<![CDATA[How To Deal]]>2d680ac2-5763-5cb9-a208-d3c11da03a48Sat, 11 Apr 2026 02:40:37 +0000Captivate.fmAttachment Nerdhttps://artwork.captivate.fm/e42cc46e-49c1-4f7b-929b-7f34b105df66/cover-optimized-with-logo.pngHow To DealAttachment NerdAttachment NerdHow To Deal is the podcast for parents who want to raise emotionally healthy kids in a world full of messy moments. Therapist and bestselling author Eli Harwood (aka The Attachment Nerd) brings you real stories, expert advice, and practical tools to build stronger relationships with your children—and yourself. Attachmentnerd.comhttps://www.attachmentnerd.comfalseepisodiccc36d380-f34a-11f0-8840-9356525c6c8dnopodcastMembershipHow To Make a Parenting U-Turn | With Wendy SynderHow To Make a Parenting U-Turn | With Wendy SynderEpisode Summary

If you've ever whispered to yourself, "Is it too late? Have I already done too much damage?" — this episode is for you. Eli sits down with Wendy Snyder, founder of Fresh Start Family and author of the brand-new book Fresh Start Your Family, to talk about the most hopeful truth in parenting: it is never too late to start over. Wendy shares her own raw journey from a reactive, overwhelmed mom to a parenting educator who has helped thousands of families worldwide break the cycle of fear-based discipline — and she brings the receipts, the real stories, and the practical tools to prove it.

Key Takeaways

  • You are not failing — your nervous system is repeating what it knows. When you snap, yell, or fall back into old patterns, it's not a character flaw. It's a conditioned response. Self-compassion is the first step to change, not a luxury.
  • Failure is just unfinished success. Mistakes — yours and your kids' — are opportunities to learn, not evidence that you're a bad parent. 99% of mistakes are repairable.
  • Your nervous system chooses the comfortable hell over the uncomfortable heaven — until it gets enough data that something new is safe. Change is possible, but it takes consistent small steps and community support.
  • Repair is greater than perfection. A true repair includes: owning your part, affirming your child's dignity ("You don't deserve to be spoken to that way"), sharing what you're learning, and doing a make-up — an act of service to restore the relationship.
  • Strong-willed kids are cycle breakers. They are the ones who force the change. Their resistance to fear-based tactics is a feature, not a bug.
  • A fresh start is available at every age — with toddlers, tweens, teens, and yes, even as an adult child with aging parents. Humility + willingness = the beginning of change.
  • True leadership isn't certainty and control — it's maintaining connection while holding dignity for the whole family.

About the Guest

Wendy Snyder is the founder & CEO of Fresh Start Family, an online worldwide educational positive parenting platform, and host of The Fresh Start Family Show podcast. Through her transformational programs, coaching, and courses, Wendy has helped thousands of families break generational cycles of fear, punishment, and disconnection. Her new book, Fresh Start Your Family: Powerful Parenting to Restore Peace in Your Home, is available now.

Connect with Wendy:


Resources Mentioned


Connect


]]>Episode Summary

If you've ever whispered to yourself, "Is it too late? Have I already done too much damage?" — this episode is for you. Eli sits down with Wendy Snyder, founder of Fresh Start Family and author of the brand-new book Fresh Start Your Family, to talk about the most hopeful truth in parenting: it is never too late to start over. Wendy shares her own raw journey from a reactive, overwhelmed mom to a parenting educator who has helped thousands of families worldwide break the cycle of fear-based discipline — and she brings the receipts, the real stories, and the practical tools to prove it.

Key Takeaways

  • You are not failing — your nervous system is repeating what it knows. When you snap, yell, or fall back into old patterns, it's not a character flaw. It's a conditioned response. Self-compassion is the first step to change, not a luxury.
  • Failure is just unfinished success. Mistakes — yours and your kids' — are opportunities to learn, not evidence that you're a bad parent. 99% of mistakes are repairable.
  • Your nervous system chooses the comfortable hell over the uncomfortable heaven — until it gets enough data that something new is safe. Change is possible, but it takes consistent small steps and community support.
  • Repair is greater than perfection. A true repair includes: owning your part, affirming your child's dignity ("You don't deserve to be spoken to that way"), sharing what you're learning, and doing a make-up — an act of service to restore the relationship.
  • Strong-willed kids are cycle breakers. They are the ones who force the change. Their resistance to fear-based tactics is a feature, not a bug.
  • A fresh start is available at every age — with toddlers, tweens, teens, and yes, even as an adult child with aging parents. Humility + willingness = the beginning of change.
  • True leadership isn't certainty and control — it's maintaining connection while holding dignity for the whole family.

About the Guest

Wendy Snyder is the founder & CEO of Fresh Start Family, an online worldwide educational positive parenting platform, and host of The Fresh Start Family Show podcast. Through her transformational programs, coaching, and courses, Wendy has helped thousands of families break generational cycles of fear, punishment, and disconnection. Her new book, Fresh Start Your Family: Powerful Parenting to Restore Peace in Your Home, is available now.

Connect with Wendy:


Resources Mentioned


Connect


]]>a4588297-799c-40c8-a8fe-f79490777ef8Fri, 10 Apr 2026 09:00:00 -060030:56falsefull213132How To Use Music and Rhythm To Regulate Ourselves and Our Kids | With Kira WileyHow To Use Music and Rhythm To Regulate Ourselves and Our Kids | With Kira WileyEpisode Summary

Did you know humming can literally lower your heart rate in the middle of a parenting meltdown? In this episode, Eli is joined by bestselling children's music artist and mindfulness expert Kira Willey to unpack the science of why rhythm is one of the most powerful regulation tools available to parents and kids — and how to start using it today.

From butterfly taps to transition songs to the Ha Ha Hyena game, Kira shares practical, playful, and science-backed strategies that work with how children's brains actually develop — through music, movement, and imagination. Whether you're in the middle of a chaotic morning routine or trying to head off a bedtime meltdown, this episode will change the way you think about the music already in your life.

Key Takeaways

  • Rhythm is structure — the organized, predictable beat of music has a biologically calming effect on the nervous system, even in babies.
  • Humming is a secret superpower — a 2023 study found humming lowers heart rate and increases heart rate variability (HRV), activating the parasympathetic nervous system and reducing stress.
  • Butterfly taps work — rhythmic self-tapping (crossing arms and gently patting your own shoulders) can bring groundedness during moments of high frustration.
  • Music bypasses words — instead of talking at dysregulated kids, music engages entirely different parts of the brain, bringing more attention and focus.
  • Transition songs are magic — a simple song tied to getting in the car, cleaning up toys, or sitting down to dinner creates predictability and reduces meltdowns.
  • Music creates durable memories — information set to melody is remembered differently in the brain. People with dementia can still sing their wedding song when they can't remember family members' names.
  • Singing together releases oxytocin — communal music-making (even just humming or clapping) releases the love and trust hormone, lowers collective heart rate, and builds genuine connection.
  • You are the DJ of your home's vibe — music is the fastest, easiest tool you have to set the emotional tone of any room, any moment.
  • Practice tools before you need them — teach kids breathing games and rhythm exercises during calm times so those tools are ready when big feelings hit.

About the Guest

Kira Willey is an award-winning children's music artist, author, and kids' yoga and mindfulness expert. She is the bestselling author of Breathe Like a Bear and her brand-new book The Joyful Child: Calm the Chaos, Connect with Your Kids, and Create More Happiness in Your Daily Routines. Kira is also the co-creator and host of three PBS mindfulness, music, and yoga television shows and creator of Rockin' Yoga school programs.


Resources Mentioned

  • 📘 The Joyful Child by Kira Willey — Amazon | Penguin Random House
  • 📘 Breathe Like a Bear by Kira Willey — Amazon
  • 🔬 2023 Humming/HRV Study (Trivedi et al., Cureus) — Read the study
  • 🧠 The HALT Framework (Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired) — a simple self-check tool for knowing when to pause conflict
  • 🎶 Rockin' Yoga School Programs by Kira Willey — kirawilley.com
  • 🖨️ Free Mindfulness Printables for Kids (with book order) — kirawilley.com

Learn more about secure parenting: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/secure-parenting-program

Connect with Eli:


Music by Gold Child: https://www.goldchildmusic.com/

]]>Episode Summary

Did you know humming can literally lower your heart rate in the middle of a parenting meltdown? In this episode, Eli is joined by bestselling children's music artist and mindfulness expert Kira Willey to unpack the science of why rhythm is one of the most powerful regulation tools available to parents and kids — and how to start using it today.

From butterfly taps to transition songs to the Ha Ha Hyena game, Kira shares practical, playful, and science-backed strategies that work with how children's brains actually develop — through music, movement, and imagination. Whether you're in the middle of a chaotic morning routine or trying to head off a bedtime meltdown, this episode will change the way you think about the music already in your life.

Key Takeaways

  • Rhythm is structure — the organized, predictable beat of music has a biologically calming effect on the nervous system, even in babies.
  • Humming is a secret superpower — a 2023 study found humming lowers heart rate and increases heart rate variability (HRV), activating the parasympathetic nervous system and reducing stress.
  • Butterfly taps work — rhythmic self-tapping (crossing arms and gently patting your own shoulders) can bring groundedness during moments of high frustration.
  • Music bypasses words — instead of talking at dysregulated kids, music engages entirely different parts of the brain, bringing more attention and focus.
  • Transition songs are magic — a simple song tied to getting in the car, cleaning up toys, or sitting down to dinner creates predictability and reduces meltdowns.
  • Music creates durable memories — information set to melody is remembered differently in the brain. People with dementia can still sing their wedding song when they can't remember family members' names.
  • Singing together releases oxytocin — communal music-making (even just humming or clapping) releases the love and trust hormone, lowers collective heart rate, and builds genuine connection.
  • You are the DJ of your home's vibe — music is the fastest, easiest tool you have to set the emotional tone of any room, any moment.
  • Practice tools before you need them — teach kids breathing games and rhythm exercises during calm times so those tools are ready when big feelings hit.

About the Guest

Kira Willey is an award-winning children's music artist, author, and kids' yoga and mindfulness expert. She is the bestselling author of Breathe Like a Bear and her brand-new book The Joyful Child: Calm the Chaos, Connect with Your Kids, and Create More Happiness in Your Daily Routines. Kira is also the co-creator and host of three PBS mindfulness, music, and yoga television shows and creator of Rockin' Yoga school programs.


Resources Mentioned

  • 📘 The Joyful Child by Kira Willey — Amazon | Penguin Random House
  • 📘 Breathe Like a Bear by Kira Willey — Amazon
  • 🔬 2023 Humming/HRV Study (Trivedi et al., Cureus) — Read the study
  • 🧠 The HALT Framework (Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired) — a simple self-check tool for knowing when to pause conflict
  • 🎶 Rockin' Yoga School Programs by Kira Willey — kirawilley.com
  • 🖨️ Free Mindfulness Printables for Kids (with book order) — kirawilley.com

Learn more about secure parenting: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/secure-parenting-program

Connect with Eli:


Music by Gold Child: https://www.goldchildmusic.com/

]]>17d103b2-5659-4378-8be0-f5f34e4fadbbFri, 03 Apr 2026 09:00:00 -060026:28falsefull212122How To Deal With Boredom | With Lizzie AssaHow To Deal With Boredom | With Lizzie AssaHow to Deal with Kids Who Say "I'm Bored" — with Lizzie Assa

Episode Summary

Parenting coach and author Lizzie Assa joins Eli to unpack why modern parents have accidentally taken over their children's play — and how to give it back. From reframing boredom as a bid for connection, to setting up "play pockets" around your home, this episode is a practical, permission-giving guide to raising kids who can play independently.

Key Takeaways

  1. Play belongs to the child. Your job is not to optimize or entertain during play — it's to protect the time and space for it.
  2. Boredom isn't a failure. When your child says "I'm bored," it can be a bid for connection — and it's a sign you've reserved unstructured time for them.
  3. Be a mirror, not an entertainer. When kids invite you into play, give the control back: "Tell me what the puppy does."
  4. Play pockets work. Bring open-ended materials to where life already happens in your home — the kitchen, laundry room, even the bathroom cabinet.
  5. Less really is more. Too many toys create decision fatigue and actually prevent kids from entering deep imaginative play.
  6. Independent play is a skill that takes practice. Like learning to read, it needs gradual scaffolding — not a scheduled demand.
  7. Close the loop. Come back after the play session to notice and name what your child accomplished. This builds play confidence.

About the Guest

Lizzie Assa, MS Ed is a parenting coach, former preschool teacher, and founder of The Workspace for Children — a platform followed by over 200K parents on Instagram. She is the author of But I'm Bored!: Discover the Power of Independent Play to Raise Confident, Resilient Kids (G.P. Putnam's Sons, 2026), which she also narrated as an audiobook.

  1. 🌐 Website: workspaceforchildren.com
  2. 📸 Instagram: @theworkspaceforchildren
  3. 📬 Substack: The Workspace for Children on Substack

Resources Mentioned

  1. 📗 But I'm Bored! by Lizzie Assa — Amazon | Penguin Random House
  2. 🎧 But I'm Bored! Audiobook (read by Lizzie herself) — Amazon Audible
  3. 🌐 The Workspace for Children — play guides, coaching, and playspace design resources
  4. 📬 The Workspace for Children Substack — weekly ideas for independent play
  5. 🛒 Lizzie's Curated Toy & Play Favorites — open-ended toy recommendations mentioned in the episode

Learn more about secure parenting: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/secure-parenting-program

Connect with Eli:

  1. Website: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/
  2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentnerd/
  3. TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentnerd

Music by Gold Child: https://www.goldchildmusic.com/

]]>How to Deal with Kids Who Say "I'm Bored" — with Lizzie Assa

Episode Summary

Parenting coach and author Lizzie Assa joins Eli to unpack why modern parents have accidentally taken over their children's play — and how to give it back. From reframing boredom as a bid for connection, to setting up "play pockets" around your home, this episode is a practical, permission-giving guide to raising kids who can play independently.

Key Takeaways

  1. Play belongs to the child. Your job is not to optimize or entertain during play — it's to protect the time and space for it.
  2. Boredom isn't a failure. When your child says "I'm bored," it can be a bid for connection — and it's a sign you've reserved unstructured time for them.
  3. Be a mirror, not an entertainer. When kids invite you into play, give the control back: "Tell me what the puppy does."
  4. Play pockets work. Bring open-ended materials to where life already happens in your home — the kitchen, laundry room, even the bathroom cabinet.
  5. Less really is more. Too many toys create decision fatigue and actually prevent kids from entering deep imaginative play.
  6. Independent play is a skill that takes practice. Like learning to read, it needs gradual scaffolding — not a scheduled demand.
  7. Close the loop. Come back after the play session to notice and name what your child accomplished. This builds play confidence.

About the Guest

Lizzie Assa, MS Ed is a parenting coach, former preschool teacher, and founder of The Workspace for Children — a platform followed by over 200K parents on Instagram. She is the author of But I'm Bored!: Discover the Power of Independent Play to Raise Confident, Resilient Kids (G.P. Putnam's Sons, 2026), which she also narrated as an audiobook.

  1. 🌐 Website: workspaceforchildren.com
  2. 📸 Instagram: @theworkspaceforchildren
  3. 📬 Substack: The Workspace for Children on Substack

Resources Mentioned

  1. 📗 But I'm Bored! by Lizzie Assa — Amazon | Penguin Random House
  2. 🎧 But I'm Bored! Audiobook (read by Lizzie herself) — Amazon Audible
  3. 🌐 The Workspace for Children — play guides, coaching, and playspace design resources
  4. 📬 The Workspace for Children Substack — weekly ideas for independent play
  5. 🛒 Lizzie's Curated Toy & Play Favorites — open-ended toy recommendations mentioned in the episode

Learn more about secure parenting: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/secure-parenting-program

Connect with Eli:

  1. Website: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/
  2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentnerd/
  3. TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentnerd

Music by Gold Child: https://www.goldchildmusic.com/

]]>0cdd4149-e949-414b-86aa-ebe5d225f380Fri, 27 Mar 2026 09:00:00 -060031:22falsefull211112How To Be a Secure Parent in the Midst of a CrisisHow To Be a Secure Parent in the Midst of a CrisisEpisode Summary

In this powerful solo episode, Eli Harwood gets real about one of the hardest parenting challenges there is: how do you help your child feel safe and secure when you don't feel safe yourself? Drawing from a deeply personal experience — her six-year-old daughter's unexpected ICU admission — Eli walks through the core principles of attachment-based parenting under pressure. Whether you're navigating a family health crisis, divorce, oppression, or uncertainty in the world, this episode will remind you that your presence is one of the most powerful medicines you can offer your kids.

Key Takeaways

  1. Your job isn't to remove fear — it's to make sure your child doesn't feel alone in it. Saying "everything's fine" when it isn't is a dismissal; acknowledging "this feels hard" is connection.
  2. Attachment systems exist for moments of threat. Crisis doesn't break attachment — it activates it.
  3. Act on what you can control, then become emotional support. Take practical steps to remove real threat, but once you've done what you can, your presence is the intervention.
  4. Distinguish removing threat from removing discomfort. We aren't supposed to shield our kids from all discomfort — we're meant to protect them from real danger and walk alongside them through the rest.
  5. You cannot pour from an empty cup. Your nervous system needs co-regulation too. Lean on your community so you can show up for your kids.
  6. Imperfection is part of the process. Crisis is messy. Keep returning to connection — that returning is what secure attachment feels like to a child.
  7. The 'Good Enough Parent' is one who keeps coming back. D.W. Winnicott's concept reminds us that reliability and repair matter far more than perfection.

About Eli Harwood

Eli Harwood (MA, LPC), known as @attachmentnerd, is a licensed therapist, USA TODAY bestselling author, and Child Psychology Award winner with 19+ years of clinical experience. She is a mom of three and the creator of Attachment Nerd, a community of 1.2M+ caregivers worldwide. Eli translates peer-reviewed attachment research into plain-language tools that help parents build trust, connection, and resilience with their kids — without shame or blame.

  1. 🌐 Website: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/
  2. 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentnerd/
  3. 🎵 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentnerd

Resources Mentioned

  1. 📖 Eli's Newest Book — How to Deal with Your __ So Your Kids Don't Have To (the book referenced in the episode with a chapter on parental loneliness) https://www.amazon.com/Deal-Your-__-Kids-Dont/dp/1632175967
  2. 📖 Eli's Book — Raising Securely Attached Kids (USA TODAY Bestseller, Child Psychology Award winner) https://www.amazon.com/Raising-Securely-Attached-Kids-Connection-Focused/dp/B0CPDP7DT5
  3. 📖 Eli's Book — Securely Attached (attachment workbook for adults) https://www.amazon.com/Securely-Attached-Transform-Attachment-Relationships/dp/1632174898
  4. 🧠 D.W. Winnicott's "Good Enough Mother/Parent" concept — learn more via Wikipedia overview: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Good_enough_parent
  5. 🎓 Secure Parenting Program (Pay-What-You-Can) https://www.attachmentnerd.com/secure-parenting-program

Learn more about secure parenting: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/secure-parenting-program

Connect with Eli:

  1. Website: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/
  2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentnerd/
  3. TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentnerd

Music by Gold Child: https://www.goldchildmusic.com/

]]>Episode Summary

In this powerful solo episode, Eli Harwood gets real about one of the hardest parenting challenges there is: how do you help your child feel safe and secure when you don't feel safe yourself? Drawing from a deeply personal experience — her six-year-old daughter's unexpected ICU admission — Eli walks through the core principles of attachment-based parenting under pressure. Whether you're navigating a family health crisis, divorce, oppression, or uncertainty in the world, this episode will remind you that your presence is one of the most powerful medicines you can offer your kids.

Key Takeaways

  1. Your job isn't to remove fear — it's to make sure your child doesn't feel alone in it. Saying "everything's fine" when it isn't is a dismissal; acknowledging "this feels hard" is connection.
  2. Attachment systems exist for moments of threat. Crisis doesn't break attachment — it activates it.
  3. Act on what you can control, then become emotional support. Take practical steps to remove real threat, but once you've done what you can, your presence is the intervention.
  4. Distinguish removing threat from removing discomfort. We aren't supposed to shield our kids from all discomfort — we're meant to protect them from real danger and walk alongside them through the rest.
  5. You cannot pour from an empty cup. Your nervous system needs co-regulation too. Lean on your community so you can show up for your kids.
  6. Imperfection is part of the process. Crisis is messy. Keep returning to connection — that returning is what secure attachment feels like to a child.
  7. The 'Good Enough Parent' is one who keeps coming back. D.W. Winnicott's concept reminds us that reliability and repair matter far more than perfection.

About Eli Harwood

Eli Harwood (MA, LPC), known as @attachmentnerd, is a licensed therapist, USA TODAY bestselling author, and Child Psychology Award winner with 19+ years of clinical experience. She is a mom of three and the creator of Attachment Nerd, a community of 1.2M+ caregivers worldwide. Eli translates peer-reviewed attachment research into plain-language tools that help parents build trust, connection, and resilience with their kids — without shame or blame.

  1. 🌐 Website: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/
  2. 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentnerd/
  3. 🎵 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentnerd

Resources Mentioned

  1. 📖 Eli's Newest Book — How to Deal with Your __ So Your Kids Don't Have To (the book referenced in the episode with a chapter on parental loneliness) https://www.amazon.com/Deal-Your-__-Kids-Dont/dp/1632175967
  2. 📖 Eli's Book — Raising Securely Attached Kids (USA TODAY Bestseller, Child Psychology Award winner) https://www.amazon.com/Raising-Securely-Attached-Kids-Connection-Focused/dp/B0CPDP7DT5
  3. 📖 Eli's Book — Securely Attached (attachment workbook for adults) https://www.amazon.com/Securely-Attached-Transform-Attachment-Relationships/dp/1632174898
  4. 🧠 D.W. Winnicott's "Good Enough Mother/Parent" concept — learn more via Wikipedia overview: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Good_enough_parent
  5. 🎓 Secure Parenting Program (Pay-What-You-Can) https://www.attachmentnerd.com/secure-parenting-program

Learn more about secure parenting: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/secure-parenting-program

Connect with Eli:

  1. Website: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/
  2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentnerd/
  3. TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentnerd

Music by Gold Child: https://www.goldchildmusic.com/

]]>637134ec-448d-4687-8dcb-70b83b9b4167Sun, 22 Mar 2026 09:00:00 -060019:07falsefull210102How to Deal with Clutter & Be a More Present Parent | With Katy WellsHow to Deal with Clutter & Be a More Present Parent | With Katy WellsHow to Deal with Clutter (ft. Katy Joy Wells)

Episode Summary

Feeling overwhelmed by your home — and how it's affecting your ability to show up for your kids? In this episode, Eli welcomes holistic decluttering expert and author Katy Joy Wells to explore the surprising connection between a cluttered home and your capacity to be a present, secure parent. Katy breaks down the four types of clutter, explains why popular decluttering methods keep failing, and gives you two practical habits you can start today — no weekend overhaul required.

Key Takeaways

  1. Clutter isn't just about stuff. It steals your time, energy, and ability to connect with your kids — and there's real science behind it.
  2. There are 4 types of clutter — superficial, scarcity, sentimental, and identity — and each requires a different strategy. Applying the wrong tool to the wrong type is why most methods fail.
  3. We don't just buy things — we buy stories, emotions, and beliefs about ourselves. Understanding what's driving your accumulation is the key to stopping the cycle.
  4. The "good enough home" (inspired by D.W. Winnicott's attachment concept) gives you permission to release shame and focus on what actually matters.
  5. Mess is expected. Clutter is optional. Neither says anything about your worth as a parent.
  6. Start with two habits: Set up a permanent donation station, and practice daily "clutter audits" built into your existing routine.
  7. Action creates motivation — not the other way around. You don't need to feel motivated to start; you just need to start.

About the Guest

Katy Joy Wells is a holistic decluttering expert, host of The Maximized Minimalist Podcast (5M+ listens, Top 50 globally), and author of Making Home Your Happy Place: A Real-Life Guide to Decluttering Without the Overwhelm. Through her online programs and podcast, she has helped hundreds of thousands of families transform chaotic homes into calm, clutter-free spaces by getting to the emotional root of the problem.

  1. 🌐 Website: katyjoywells.com
  2. 📺 YouTube: youtube.com/@katyjoywells
  3. 📸 Instagram: @katyjoywells

Resources Mentioned

  1. 📖 Making Home Your Happy Place by Katy Joy Wells — Available everywhere books are sold
  2. 🎙️ The Maximized Minimalist Podcast — Katy's podcast with 350+ episodes
  3. 🧠 UCLA Clutter & Cortisol Study (PubMed) — Research showing women in cluttered homes have elevated cortisol levels and adverse health profiles
  4. 📚 D.W. Winnicott's "Good Enough Mother" concept — The attachment theory concept referenced in episode
  5. 🏠 Katy's Free Declutter Guide — Get started simplifying today

Learn more about secure parenting:

https://www.attachmentnerd.com/secure-parenting-program

Connect with Eli:

  1. Website: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/
  2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentnerd/
  3. TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentnerd

Music by Gold Child: https://www.goldchildmusic.com/

Mentioned in this episode:

009 - Intro

]]>How to Deal with Clutter (ft. Katy Joy Wells)

Episode Summary

Feeling overwhelmed by your home — and how it's affecting your ability to show up for your kids? In this episode, Eli welcomes holistic decluttering expert and author Katy Joy Wells to explore the surprising connection between a cluttered home and your capacity to be a present, secure parent. Katy breaks down the four types of clutter, explains why popular decluttering methods keep failing, and gives you two practical habits you can start today — no weekend overhaul required.

Key Takeaways

  1. Clutter isn't just about stuff. It steals your time, energy, and ability to connect with your kids — and there's real science behind it.
  2. There are 4 types of clutter — superficial, scarcity, sentimental, and identity — and each requires a different strategy. Applying the wrong tool to the wrong type is why most methods fail.
  3. We don't just buy things — we buy stories, emotions, and beliefs about ourselves. Understanding what's driving your accumulation is the key to stopping the cycle.
  4. The "good enough home" (inspired by D.W. Winnicott's attachment concept) gives you permission to release shame and focus on what actually matters.
  5. Mess is expected. Clutter is optional. Neither says anything about your worth as a parent.
  6. Start with two habits: Set up a permanent donation station, and practice daily "clutter audits" built into your existing routine.
  7. Action creates motivation — not the other way around. You don't need to feel motivated to start; you just need to start.

About the Guest

Katy Joy Wells is a holistic decluttering expert, host of The Maximized Minimalist Podcast (5M+ listens, Top 50 globally), and author of Making Home Your Happy Place: A Real-Life Guide to Decluttering Without the Overwhelm. Through her online programs and podcast, she has helped hundreds of thousands of families transform chaotic homes into calm, clutter-free spaces by getting to the emotional root of the problem.

  1. 🌐 Website: katyjoywells.com
  2. 📺 YouTube: youtube.com/@katyjoywells
  3. 📸 Instagram: @katyjoywells

Resources Mentioned

  1. 📖 Making Home Your Happy Place by Katy Joy Wells — Available everywhere books are sold
  2. 🎙️ The Maximized Minimalist Podcast — Katy's podcast with 350+ episodes
  3. 🧠 UCLA Clutter & Cortisol Study (PubMed) — Research showing women in cluttered homes have elevated cortisol levels and adverse health profiles
  4. 📚 D.W. Winnicott's "Good Enough Mother" concept — The attachment theory concept referenced in episode
  5. 🏠 Katy's Free Declutter Guide — Get started simplifying today

Learn more about secure parenting:

https://www.attachmentnerd.com/secure-parenting-program

Connect with Eli:

  1. Website: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/
  2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentnerd/
  3. TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentnerd

Music by Gold Child: https://www.goldchildmusic.com/

Mentioned in this episode:

009 - Intro

]]>31873b20-6f44-402d-9ff6-608b0ec859a0Sun, 15 Mar 2026 09:00:00 -060036:50falsefull2992How To Prepare Your Kids for a World Full of Cults | With NXIVM Whistleblowers Sarah & NippyHow To Prepare Your Kids for a World Full of Cults | With NXIVM Whistleblowers Sarah & NippyHow to Prepare Your Kids for a World Full of Cults

Episode Summary

In this powerful episode, host Eli welcomes NXIVM whistleblowers and A Little Bit Culty podcast hosts Sarah Edmondson and Anthony "Nippy" Ames to talk about what cultic abuse actually looks like — and more importantly, what parents can do to help protect their children from it. Together, they explore the psychology of manipulation, the red flags every parent should know, and how raising kids who can question authority may be one of the greatest protective gifts we can give them.

Key Takeaways

  1. Cults start with inspiration, not coercion. The first step into a high-control group almost always feels meaningful — like joining a movement or community that's changing the world.
  2. It can happen to anyone. Cults often recruit high-achieving, charismatic individuals — not just vulnerable or uneducated people. Intelligence is not a shield.
  3. The real red flag isn't the group — it's the behavior. Look for: inability to question authority, isolation from family/friends, love bombing, "us vs. them" thinking, and a "one true way" belief system.
  4. Teach kids to spot tricky behaviors, not tricky people. Abusers are often well-respected members of society — coaches, pastors, teachers. Teach kids that it's the behavior that's the warning sign, not the person.
  5. Secrets vs. surprises. A great framework for kids: surprises feel light and exciting; secrets feel heavy. Secrets are not good for our hearts.
  6. Love bombing + future faking = a manipulation pattern. Excessive praise, special treatment, and promises that never come true are a recognizable sequence used by predators.
  7. Raising empowered kids is inconvenient — and worth it. Children who are allowed to question authority, express preferences, and push back learn to recognize when something feels wrong.
  8. If you're worried about a group, don't go to the leader. Seek out former members, look on Reddit, and find outside voices before confronting the situation from inside.

About the Guests

Sarah Edmondson is a Canadian actress and podcaster who spent 12 years inside NXIVM before blowing the whistle and helping bring down cult leader Keith Raniere. She is featured in HBO's The Vow documentary series and is the author of the memoir Scarred. She co-hosts A Little Bit Culty podcast with her husband Nippy.

  1. 🌐 Website: alittlebitculty.com
  2. 📸 Instagram: @sarahedmondson
  3. 🐦 Twitter/X: @sarahjedmondson

Anthony "Nippy" Ames is a former NXIVM member turned whistleblower, featured prominently in HBO's The Vow. He is the Executive Producer of A Little Bit Culty podcast.

  1. 🌐 Website: alittlebitculty.com
  2. 📸 Instagram: @anthonyames11
  3. 🐦 Twitter/X: @nippyames

Resources Mentioned

  1. 📺 The Vow (HBO Documentary Series) — Watch on Max
  2. 📚 Scarred by Sarah Edmondson — Amazon | Publisher (Chronicle Books)
  3. 🎙️ A Little Bit Culty Podcast — alittlebitculty.com
  4. 📖 Sarah & Nippy's Upcoming Book — Pre-order at sarahedmondson.com/book
  5. 🕷️ Spot a Spider (Dr. Amy Saltzman's child safety program) — spotaspider.com
  6. 🧠 Dr. Ramani Durvasula on Future Faking & Narcissism — doctor-ramani.com
  7. 📖 I'm Glad My Mom Died by Jennette McCurdy — Amazon

Learn more about secure parenting:

https://www.attachmentnerd.com/secure-parenting-program

Connect with Eli:

  1. Website: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/
  2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentnerd/
  3. TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentnerd

Music by Gold Child: https://www.goldchildmusic.com/

]]>How to Prepare Your Kids for a World Full of Cults

Episode Summary

In this powerful episode, host Eli welcomes NXIVM whistleblowers and A Little Bit Culty podcast hosts Sarah Edmondson and Anthony "Nippy" Ames to talk about what cultic abuse actually looks like — and more importantly, what parents can do to help protect their children from it. Together, they explore the psychology of manipulation, the red flags every parent should know, and how raising kids who can question authority may be one of the greatest protective gifts we can give them.

Key Takeaways

  1. Cults start with inspiration, not coercion. The first step into a high-control group almost always feels meaningful — like joining a movement or community that's changing the world.
  2. It can happen to anyone. Cults often recruit high-achieving, charismatic individuals — not just vulnerable or uneducated people. Intelligence is not a shield.
  3. The real red flag isn't the group — it's the behavior. Look for: inability to question authority, isolation from family/friends, love bombing, "us vs. them" thinking, and a "one true way" belief system.
  4. Teach kids to spot tricky behaviors, not tricky people. Abusers are often well-respected members of society — coaches, pastors, teachers. Teach kids that it's the behavior that's the warning sign, not the person.
  5. Secrets vs. surprises. A great framework for kids: surprises feel light and exciting; secrets feel heavy. Secrets are not good for our hearts.
  6. Love bombing + future faking = a manipulation pattern. Excessive praise, special treatment, and promises that never come true are a recognizable sequence used by predators.
  7. Raising empowered kids is inconvenient — and worth it. Children who are allowed to question authority, express preferences, and push back learn to recognize when something feels wrong.
  8. If you're worried about a group, don't go to the leader. Seek out former members, look on Reddit, and find outside voices before confronting the situation from inside.

About the Guests

Sarah Edmondson is a Canadian actress and podcaster who spent 12 years inside NXIVM before blowing the whistle and helping bring down cult leader Keith Raniere. She is featured in HBO's The Vow documentary series and is the author of the memoir Scarred. She co-hosts A Little Bit Culty podcast with her husband Nippy.

  1. 🌐 Website: alittlebitculty.com
  2. 📸 Instagram: @sarahedmondson
  3. 🐦 Twitter/X: @sarahjedmondson

Anthony "Nippy" Ames is a former NXIVM member turned whistleblower, featured prominently in HBO's The Vow. He is the Executive Producer of A Little Bit Culty podcast.

  1. 🌐 Website: alittlebitculty.com
  2. 📸 Instagram: @anthonyames11
  3. 🐦 Twitter/X: @nippyames

Resources Mentioned

  1. 📺 The Vow (HBO Documentary Series) — Watch on Max
  2. 📚 Scarred by Sarah Edmondson — Amazon | Publisher (Chronicle Books)
  3. 🎙️ A Little Bit Culty Podcast — alittlebitculty.com
  4. 📖 Sarah & Nippy's Upcoming Book — Pre-order at sarahedmondson.com/book
  5. 🕷️ Spot a Spider (Dr. Amy Saltzman's child safety program) — spotaspider.com
  6. 🧠 Dr. Ramani Durvasula on Future Faking & Narcissism — doctor-ramani.com
  7. 📖 I'm Glad My Mom Died by Jennette McCurdy — Amazon

Learn more about secure parenting:

https://www.attachmentnerd.com/secure-parenting-program

Connect with Eli:

  1. Website: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/
  2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentnerd/
  3. TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentnerd

Music by Gold Child: https://www.goldchildmusic.com/

]]>ba02eb19-d327-4eb9-a8ac-1a2491b03f6dFri, 06 Mar 2026 09:00:00 -060039:17falsefull2882How to Teach Young Kids About Body Safety & Consent | With Jayneen SandersHow to Teach Young Kids About Body Safety & Consent | With Jayneen SandersHow to Deal with Teaching Kids Body Safety & Consent | Jayneen Sanders

Episode Summary

In this deeply important conversation, Eli sits down with internationally acclaimed children's book author and publisher Jayneen Sanders to explore how parents can teach body safety, consent, and boundaries to children of all ages — from infancy through the teen years. Together they discuss why body autonomy is one of the most powerful tools we can give our kids, how grooming actually works, and what we can do to raise children who trust their instincts and feel safe coming to us.

Key Takeaways

  1. Start from birth. You can begin narrating body care to infants — "I'm moving your arm to put your jacket on" — planting the seeds of body autonomy from day one.
  2. Use the word 'consent' with young children. Teaching kids that no one can enter their personal space without permission — and that they must ask too — is the foundation of body safety.
  3. Be a warrior parent. When grandparents or other adults override your child's physical boundaries (the forced hug), speak up. Protecting body autonomy in the moment is not rude — it's essential.
  4. Teach the four-step boundary response: Name the boundary that was crossed → Share how it made you feel → State what you want them to do → Know your next step (tell a trusted adult).
  5. Teach body warning signs. Kids' bodies give them signals — a sick stomach, shakiness, or an "icky" feeling — when something is wrong. Empower children to act on those signals immediately.
  6. Build a safety network of 3–5 trusted adults, including at least one outside the immediate family, so children always have someone to turn to.
  7. Check in regularly, not anxiously. Monthly low-pressure check-ins ("Has anyone made you uncomfortable lately?") keep communication open without creating fear.
  8. Prevention is far easier than treatment. A child who discloses abuse and is believed experiences significantly less long-term trauma than one who cannot tell anyone.
  9. Read books together and keep the conversation going. Books give children visual anchors and open the door to ongoing dialogue — which is where the real protection lives.
  10. It takes a village. Ask your child's school and childcare center about their safety policies and background check procedures.

About the Guest

Jayneen Sanders is an experienced educator, author, and publisher who advocates globally for Body Safety, Gender Equality, and Respectful Relationship Education. She founded Educate2Empower Publishing and has written over 100 children's books on critical topics including body safety and consent. Her first body safety book, Some Secrets Should Never Be Kept, was published 15 years ago and is now available in 7 languages.

Connect with Jayneen:

  1. 🌐 Website: e2epublishing.info
  2. 📸 Instagram: @jayneensandersauthor
  3. 🐦 Twitter/X: @jayneensanders
  4. 💼 LinkedIn: Jayneen Sanders

Resources Mentioned

  1. 📚 Respect Me, Respect My Boundaries by Jayneen Sanders — Shop at Educate2Empower (Jayneen's newest book, featuring a 4-step boundary-setting process)
  2. 📚 Some Secrets Should Never Be Kept by Jayneen Sanders — Amazon | Educate2Empower
  3. 📚 Body Safety Education: A Parents' Guide by Jayneen Sanders — Amazon
  4. 🏫 All Jayneen's Books & Free Resources — Educate2Empower Publishing Shop
  5. 🌐 Consent Parenting (school safety checklists & resources) — consentparenting.com
  6. 💬 Mr. Rogers quote referenced: "What is mentionable is manageable."

Learn more about secure parenting: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/secure-parenting-program

Connect with Eli:

  1. Website: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/
  2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentnerd/
  3. TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentnerd

Music by Gold Child: https://www.goldchildmusic.com/

]]>How to Deal with Teaching Kids Body Safety & Consent | Jayneen Sanders

Episode Summary

In this deeply important conversation, Eli sits down with internationally acclaimed children's book author and publisher Jayneen Sanders to explore how parents can teach body safety, consent, and boundaries to children of all ages — from infancy through the teen years. Together they discuss why body autonomy is one of the most powerful tools we can give our kids, how grooming actually works, and what we can do to raise children who trust their instincts and feel safe coming to us.

Key Takeaways

  1. Start from birth. You can begin narrating body care to infants — "I'm moving your arm to put your jacket on" — planting the seeds of body autonomy from day one.
  2. Use the word 'consent' with young children. Teaching kids that no one can enter their personal space without permission — and that they must ask too — is the foundation of body safety.
  3. Be a warrior parent. When grandparents or other adults override your child's physical boundaries (the forced hug), speak up. Protecting body autonomy in the moment is not rude — it's essential.
  4. Teach the four-step boundary response: Name the boundary that was crossed → Share how it made you feel → State what you want them to do → Know your next step (tell a trusted adult).
  5. Teach body warning signs. Kids' bodies give them signals — a sick stomach, shakiness, or an "icky" feeling — when something is wrong. Empower children to act on those signals immediately.
  6. Build a safety network of 3–5 trusted adults, including at least one outside the immediate family, so children always have someone to turn to.
  7. Check in regularly, not anxiously. Monthly low-pressure check-ins ("Has anyone made you uncomfortable lately?") keep communication open without creating fear.
  8. Prevention is far easier than treatment. A child who discloses abuse and is believed experiences significantly less long-term trauma than one who cannot tell anyone.
  9. Read books together and keep the conversation going. Books give children visual anchors and open the door to ongoing dialogue — which is where the real protection lives.
  10. It takes a village. Ask your child's school and childcare center about their safety policies and background check procedures.

About the Guest

Jayneen Sanders is an experienced educator, author, and publisher who advocates globally for Body Safety, Gender Equality, and Respectful Relationship Education. She founded Educate2Empower Publishing and has written over 100 children's books on critical topics including body safety and consent. Her first body safety book, Some Secrets Should Never Be Kept, was published 15 years ago and is now available in 7 languages.

Connect with Jayneen:

  1. 🌐 Website: e2epublishing.info
  2. 📸 Instagram: @jayneensandersauthor
  3. 🐦 Twitter/X: @jayneensanders
  4. 💼 LinkedIn: Jayneen Sanders

Resources Mentioned

  1. 📚 Respect Me, Respect My Boundaries by Jayneen Sanders — Shop at Educate2Empower (Jayneen's newest book, featuring a 4-step boundary-setting process)
  2. 📚 Some Secrets Should Never Be Kept by Jayneen Sanders — Amazon | Educate2Empower
  3. 📚 Body Safety Education: A Parents' Guide by Jayneen Sanders — Amazon
  4. 🏫 All Jayneen's Books & Free Resources — Educate2Empower Publishing Shop
  5. 🌐 Consent Parenting (school safety checklists & resources) — consentparenting.com
  6. 💬 Mr. Rogers quote referenced: "What is mentionable is manageable."

Learn more about secure parenting: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/secure-parenting-program

Connect with Eli:

  1. Website: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/
  2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentnerd/
  3. TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentnerd

Music by Gold Child: https://www.goldchildmusic.com/

]]>e6c9e918-ff3e-48c4-b995-ac85f35102e2Fri, 27 Feb 2026 09:00:00 -060035:54falsefull2772How to Deal with Our Highly Sensitive Kids | With Kristin Gallant, co-founder of Big Little FeelingsHow to Deal with Our Highly Sensitive Kids | With Kristin Gallant, co-founder of Big Little FeelingsHow to Deal with Raising a Highly Sensitive or Neurodivergent Kid

Episode Summary

Eli sits down with Kristin Gallant, co-founder of Big Little Feelings, to dig into one of the most misunderstood parenting challenges: raising a child who feels everything — deeply, loudly, and fully. Together they unpack what it really means to have a "big feeler" in your home, why the goal was never to make sensitive kids less sensitive, and the three most powerful things parents can do to help these kids thrive.

Key Takeaways

  1. There's a spectrum of sensitivity. Big feelers aren't just one type of kid — some push their feelings outward (intensity, drive), others turn them inward (overwhelm, collapse). Knowing your child's pattern matters.
  2. First step: rule out or rule in neurodivergence. Many highly sensitive kids are also autistic, have ADHD, or both. Getting clarity on how your child's brain works is one of the most powerful gifts you can give them.
  3. Believe your child. When the slide feels terrifying or the smell of salami is physically painful, validate it. Children who are believed learn to trust and advocate for themselves.
  4. Teach the Zones of Regulation. Help your child identify what zone they're in (red, yellow, green) and what they need in that state — this is more powerful than simply validating feelings.
  5. Diagnosis = understanding, not a verdict. Labels give children language, resources, and permission to stop wondering "what's wrong with me?"
  6. Your home can be the safe haven the world isn't. You may not be able to change the world for your big feeler, but you can make home a place where they don't have to mask.
  7. Resilience doesn't come from masking. It comes from authentic connection, belonging, and supported coping — not from teaching kids to suppress who they are.
  8. Let them bloom on their own timeline. Attuning to your child and meeting their nervous system where it is creates the safety from which real growth — extroversion, advocacy, friendship — can organically emerge.

About the Guest

Kristin Gallant is a parent coach and co-founder of Big Little Feelings, one of the most trusted parenting resources on the internet. Alongside her business partner Deena Margolin (a licensed child therapist), Kristin has created research-backed, parent-approved courses used by over 500,000 families. Diagnosed with ADHD at 37, and a mom to an autistic child, Kristin brings both professional expertise and deeply personal experience to her work. Her newest course, the Big Feelers Program, was built specifically for parents of highly sensitive, ADHD, and autistic kids.

  1. 🌐 Website: https://biglittlefeelings.com/
  2. 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/biglittlefeelings

Resources Mentioned

  1. 🎓 Big Feelers Program (Big Little Feelings Course) — The course built for parents of highly sensitive, ADHD, and autistic kids: https://biglittlefeelings.com/products/big-feelers
  2. 📘 The Zones of Regulation by Leah Kuypers — The self-regulation curriculum referenced in this episode (red zone, yellow zone, green zone framework): https://www.zonesofregulation.com/ Also on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Zones-Regulation-Leah-Kuypers/dp/B008M7E0G8
  3. 📗 Permission to Feel by Dr. Marc Brackett (Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence) — Referenced when discussing the importance of labeling emotions (mentalizing): https://www.amazon.com/Permission-Feel-Unlocking-Emotions-Ourselves/dp/1250212847 Learn more about Marc's work: https://marcbrackett.com/
  4. 🏫 Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence — Marc Brackett's research center on emotional intelligence: https://medicine.yale.edu/childstudy/communitypartnerships/ycei/

Learn More About Secure Parenting

Ready to build a more secure relationship with your child? https://www.attachmentnerd.com/secure-parenting-program

Connect with Eli:

  1. Website: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/
  2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentnerd/
  3. TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentnerd

Music by Gold Child: https://www.goldchildmusic.com/

]]>How to Deal with Raising a Highly Sensitive or Neurodivergent Kid

Episode Summary

Eli sits down with Kristin Gallant, co-founder of Big Little Feelings, to dig into one of the most misunderstood parenting challenges: raising a child who feels everything — deeply, loudly, and fully. Together they unpack what it really means to have a "big feeler" in your home, why the goal was never to make sensitive kids less sensitive, and the three most powerful things parents can do to help these kids thrive.

Key Takeaways

  1. There's a spectrum of sensitivity. Big feelers aren't just one type of kid — some push their feelings outward (intensity, drive), others turn them inward (overwhelm, collapse). Knowing your child's pattern matters.
  2. First step: rule out or rule in neurodivergence. Many highly sensitive kids are also autistic, have ADHD, or both. Getting clarity on how your child's brain works is one of the most powerful gifts you can give them.
  3. Believe your child. When the slide feels terrifying or the smell of salami is physically painful, validate it. Children who are believed learn to trust and advocate for themselves.
  4. Teach the Zones of Regulation. Help your child identify what zone they're in (red, yellow, green) and what they need in that state — this is more powerful than simply validating feelings.
  5. Diagnosis = understanding, not a verdict. Labels give children language, resources, and permission to stop wondering "what's wrong with me?"
  6. Your home can be the safe haven the world isn't. You may not be able to change the world for your big feeler, but you can make home a place where they don't have to mask.
  7. Resilience doesn't come from masking. It comes from authentic connection, belonging, and supported coping — not from teaching kids to suppress who they are.
  8. Let them bloom on their own timeline. Attuning to your child and meeting their nervous system where it is creates the safety from which real growth — extroversion, advocacy, friendship — can organically emerge.

About the Guest

Kristin Gallant is a parent coach and co-founder of Big Little Feelings, one of the most trusted parenting resources on the internet. Alongside her business partner Deena Margolin (a licensed child therapist), Kristin has created research-backed, parent-approved courses used by over 500,000 families. Diagnosed with ADHD at 37, and a mom to an autistic child, Kristin brings both professional expertise and deeply personal experience to her work. Her newest course, the Big Feelers Program, was built specifically for parents of highly sensitive, ADHD, and autistic kids.

  1. 🌐 Website: https://biglittlefeelings.com/
  2. 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/biglittlefeelings

Resources Mentioned

  1. 🎓 Big Feelers Program (Big Little Feelings Course) — The course built for parents of highly sensitive, ADHD, and autistic kids: https://biglittlefeelings.com/products/big-feelers
  2. 📘 The Zones of Regulation by Leah Kuypers — The self-regulation curriculum referenced in this episode (red zone, yellow zone, green zone framework): https://www.zonesofregulation.com/ Also on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Zones-Regulation-Leah-Kuypers/dp/B008M7E0G8
  3. 📗 Permission to Feel by Dr. Marc Brackett (Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence) — Referenced when discussing the importance of labeling emotions (mentalizing): https://www.amazon.com/Permission-Feel-Unlocking-Emotions-Ourselves/dp/1250212847 Learn more about Marc's work: https://marcbrackett.com/
  4. 🏫 Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence — Marc Brackett's research center on emotional intelligence: https://medicine.yale.edu/childstudy/communitypartnerships/ycei/

Learn More About Secure Parenting

Ready to build a more secure relationship with your child? https://www.attachmentnerd.com/secure-parenting-program

Connect with Eli:

  1. Website: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/
  2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentnerd/
  3. TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentnerd

Music by Gold Child: https://www.goldchildmusic.com/

]]>a598e139-da62-459d-8ceb-b146388f09e5Fri, 20 Feb 2026 09:00:00 -060040:45falsefull2662How to Deal with Mom Guilt | With Jessica Tomich SorciHow to Deal with Mom Guilt | With Jessica Tomich SorciJessica Tomich Sorci, LMFT and creator of the Mom Parts Method, shares insights on transforming mom guilt and shame using Internal Family Systems therapy. She reveals why these painful feelings aren't signs of failure, but actually pathways to healing both ourselves and our mothering.

Key Takeaways

  1. Guilt has purpose: It's a reminder when we've acted outside our values and creates opportunity for repair
  2. Shame points to old wounds: Shame is a "bookmark for your unmet needs" from childhood that still need healing
  3. Motherhood activates everything: Kids are like "heat-seeking hovercrafts" for our unresolved issues, making motherhood both triggering and healing
  4. You're mothering two kids: You're always mothering your actual child plus your inner child who still needs care
  5. Parts are trying to help: Even our "worst" internal parts are actually trying to protect and help us, they just need updating

About the Guest

Jessica Tomich Sorci, LMFT, is a pioneer in maternal mental health who created the Mom Parts method, applying Internal Family Systems therapy to motherhood. As a Level 3 Certified IFS Therapist and Certified Perinatal Mental Health Professional, she brings deep expertise to helping mothers transform difficult emotions into self-compassion.

Connect with Jessica:

  1. Website: https://www.jessicatomichsorci.com/
  2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jessicatomichsorci/
  3. LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jessica-tomich-sorci-2b577056/

Resources Mentioned

  1. When Good Moms Feel Bad - Jessica's book co-authored with Rebecca Geshuri
  2. Mom Parts Community - Online community and salons for mothers
  3. Mothercentered Approach Training - Professional training program for therapists
  4. Internal Family Systems Institute - Founded by Richard Schwartz, creator of IFS therapy
  5. Introduction to Internal Family Systems by Richard Schwartz

Learn more about secure parenting: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/secure-parenting-program

Connect with Eli:

  1. Website: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/
  2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentnerd/
  3. TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentnerd

Music by Gold Child: https://www.goldchildmusic.com/

]]>Jessica Tomich Sorci, LMFT and creator of the Mom Parts Method, shares insights on transforming mom guilt and shame using Internal Family Systems therapy. She reveals why these painful feelings aren't signs of failure, but actually pathways to healing both ourselves and our mothering.

Key Takeaways

  1. Guilt has purpose: It's a reminder when we've acted outside our values and creates opportunity for repair
  2. Shame points to old wounds: Shame is a "bookmark for your unmet needs" from childhood that still need healing
  3. Motherhood activates everything: Kids are like "heat-seeking hovercrafts" for our unresolved issues, making motherhood both triggering and healing
  4. You're mothering two kids: You're always mothering your actual child plus your inner child who still needs care
  5. Parts are trying to help: Even our "worst" internal parts are actually trying to protect and help us, they just need updating

About the Guest

Jessica Tomich Sorci, LMFT, is a pioneer in maternal mental health who created the Mom Parts method, applying Internal Family Systems therapy to motherhood. As a Level 3 Certified IFS Therapist and Certified Perinatal Mental Health Professional, she brings deep expertise to helping mothers transform difficult emotions into self-compassion.

Connect with Jessica:

  1. Website: https://www.jessicatomichsorci.com/
  2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jessicatomichsorci/
  3. LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jessica-tomich-sorci-2b577056/

Resources Mentioned

  1. When Good Moms Feel Bad - Jessica's book co-authored with Rebecca Geshuri
  2. Mom Parts Community - Online community and salons for mothers
  3. Mothercentered Approach Training - Professional training program for therapists
  4. Internal Family Systems Institute - Founded by Richard Schwartz, creator of IFS therapy
  5. Introduction to Internal Family Systems by Richard Schwartz

Learn more about secure parenting: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/secure-parenting-program

Connect with Eli:

  1. Website: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/
  2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentnerd/
  3. TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentnerd

Music by Gold Child: https://www.goldchildmusic.com/

]]>6a6e3f8d-68e8-4d88-a6a7-483434491d42Fri, 13 Feb 2026 09:00:00 -060030:18falsefull2552How to Deal with Safety Without Scaring Your Kids | With Dannah Eve,How to Deal with Safety Without Scaring Your Kids | With Dannah Eve,In this powerful conversation, safety expert Dannah Eve, known as The Street Smart Blonde with over 4 million followers, combines her academic knowledge with street smarts to deliver life-saving insights. We explore practical strategies for keeping our families safe without living in constant fear.

## Key Takeaways

- **Live aware, not in fear** - Dannah's motto emphasizes empowerment over paranoia

- **The What If Game** - Turn safety preparation into engaging family activities

- **Lying to survive** - Teaching kids when dishonesty protects their safety

- **Family code words** - Essential communication tools for emergencies

- **Trust your gut instinct** - Developing intuition as a safety muscle

- **Connection as protection** - Being your child's safe space builds trust

## About the Guest


**Dannah Eve** is a trusted safety expert and digital creator known as The Street Smart Blonde. As a former D1 athlete and Summa Cum Laude graduate in Criminology and Psychology, she combines academic knowledge with street smarts to deliver life-saving insights to her rapidly growing audience of over 4 million followers across her social media platforms.


**Connect with Dannah:**

- Website: [dannaheve.com](https://www.dannaheve.com/)

- Instagram: [@dannah_eve](https://www.instagram.com/dannah_eve/)

- YouTube: [@dannah_eve](https://www.youtube.com/@dannah_eve)

- Twitter: [@dannah_eve](https://x.com/dannah_eve)

- LinkedIn: [Dannah Eve](https://www.linkedin.com/in/dannah-eve-434b33193/)


## Resources Mentioned


- **Street Smarts Book** by Dannah Eve - [Amazon](https://www.amazon.com/Street-Smarts-Instincts-Outsmart-Danger/dp/0063438887) | [Barnes & Noble](https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/street-smarts-dannah-eve/1147525519) | [Bookshop.org](https://bookshop.org/p/books/street-smarts-trust-your-instincts-outsmart-danger-and-stay-safe-in-a-world-that-isn-t-dannah-eve/872c84c47df982dc)

---


**Learn more about secure parenting:**

https://www.attachmentnerd.com/secure-parenting-program


**Connect with Eli:**

- Website: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/

- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentnerd/

- TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentnerd


**Music by Gold Child:**

https://www.goldchildmusic.com/

]]>In this powerful conversation, safety expert Dannah Eve, known as The Street Smart Blonde with over 4 million followers, combines her academic knowledge with street smarts to deliver life-saving insights. We explore practical strategies for keeping our families safe without living in constant fear.

## Key Takeaways

- **Live aware, not in fear** - Dannah's motto emphasizes empowerment over paranoia

- **The What If Game** - Turn safety preparation into engaging family activities

- **Lying to survive** - Teaching kids when dishonesty protects their safety

- **Family code words** - Essential communication tools for emergencies

- **Trust your gut instinct** - Developing intuition as a safety muscle

- **Connection as protection** - Being your child's safe space builds trust

## About the Guest


**Dannah Eve** is a trusted safety expert and digital creator known as The Street Smart Blonde. As a former D1 athlete and Summa Cum Laude graduate in Criminology and Psychology, she combines academic knowledge with street smarts to deliver life-saving insights to her rapidly growing audience of over 4 million followers across her social media platforms.


**Connect with Dannah:**

- Website: [dannaheve.com](https://www.dannaheve.com/)

- Instagram: [@dannah_eve](https://www.instagram.com/dannah_eve/)

- YouTube: [@dannah_eve](https://www.youtube.com/@dannah_eve)

- Twitter: [@dannah_eve](https://x.com/dannah_eve)

- LinkedIn: [Dannah Eve](https://www.linkedin.com/in/dannah-eve-434b33193/)


## Resources Mentioned


- **Street Smarts Book** by Dannah Eve - [Amazon](https://www.amazon.com/Street-Smarts-Instincts-Outsmart-Danger/dp/0063438887) | [Barnes & Noble](https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/street-smarts-dannah-eve/1147525519) | [Bookshop.org](https://bookshop.org/p/books/street-smarts-trust-your-instincts-outsmart-danger-and-stay-safe-in-a-world-that-isn-t-dannah-eve/872c84c47df982dc)

---


**Learn more about secure parenting:**

https://www.attachmentnerd.com/secure-parenting-program


**Connect with Eli:**

- Website: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/

- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentnerd/

- TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentnerd


**Music by Gold Child:**

https://www.goldchildmusic.com/

]]>bdabdc34-9b64-42af-b624-1dfef594dd70Thu, 05 Feb 2026 09:00:00 -060048:34truefull2442How to Deal With Bias as Parents | Destini Ann DavisHow to Deal With Bias as Parents | Destini Ann DavisWe all have biases. Every single one of us.

They're the mental shortcuts our brains built when we were young—and most of us never thought to question them. But what happens when your child starts forming their own identity, and it challenges everything you thought you believed?

In this episode, Eli sits down with Destini Ann Davis—bestselling author of Very Intentional Parenting, certified parenting coach, and creator to unpack how our unexamined biases can quietly erode secure attachment with our kids.

They dive into:

  1. Why ALL humans have biases (and why that's not the same as being "bad")
  2. The difference between recognizing bias and acting on it
  3. How proximity and diverse exposure actually rewires our brains
  4. Why "distance breeds suspicion, but proximity breeds empathy" (Tyler Merritt)
  5. Teaching kids to pause and get curious instead of react with judgment
  6. How authenticity about our own biases creates deeper connections

Whether it's biases about race, gender, neurodivergence, body size, or a hundred other things—this conversation will help you examine what you're unconsciously passing on.

📝 TAKE THE TEST: Harvard University's Implicit Association Test (IAT) — https://implicit.harvard.edu/implicit/takeatest.html

ABOUT THE GUEST:

Destini Ann Davis is a certified parenting coach, bestselling author, and speaker who helps parents create intentional, connected relationships with their children through her "Very Intentional Parenting" approach. Her TikTok has grown to over 900K followers, and she recently earned her master's in psychology.

  1. Website: https://www.destiniann.com/
  2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/destini.ann/
  3. LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/destini-davis-a44700266/
  4. Book: Very Intentional Parenting by Destini Ann Davis

RESOURCES MENTIONED:

  1. Harvard Implicit Association Test (IAT): https://implicit.harvard.edu/implicit/takeatest.html
  2. I Take My Coffee Black by Tyler Merritt: https://www.amazon.com/Take-My-Coffee-Black-Reflections/dp/1546029419
  3. Very Intentional Parenting by Destini Ann Davis

📚 PRE-ORDER ELI'S NEW BOOK: "How to Deal With Your ____, So Your Kids Don't Have To: An Encyclopedia for Ditching Your Emotional Baggage" (April 2026) 👉 https://www.attachmentnerd.com/how-to-deal-book

🎓 SECURE PARENTING PROGRAM: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/secure-parenting-program

CONNECT WITH ELI:

  1. Website: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/
  2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentnerd/
  3. TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentnerd

🎵 Music by Gold Child: https://www.goldchildmusic.com/

]]>We all have biases. Every single one of us.

They're the mental shortcuts our brains built when we were young—and most of us never thought to question them. But what happens when your child starts forming their own identity, and it challenges everything you thought you believed?

In this episode, Eli sits down with Destini Ann Davis—bestselling author of Very Intentional Parenting, certified parenting coach, and creator to unpack how our unexamined biases can quietly erode secure attachment with our kids.

They dive into:

  1. Why ALL humans have biases (and why that's not the same as being "bad")
  2. The difference between recognizing bias and acting on it
  3. How proximity and diverse exposure actually rewires our brains
  4. Why "distance breeds suspicion, but proximity breeds empathy" (Tyler Merritt)
  5. Teaching kids to pause and get curious instead of react with judgment
  6. How authenticity about our own biases creates deeper connections

Whether it's biases about race, gender, neurodivergence, body size, or a hundred other things—this conversation will help you examine what you're unconsciously passing on.

📝 TAKE THE TEST: Harvard University's Implicit Association Test (IAT) — https://implicit.harvard.edu/implicit/takeatest.html

ABOUT THE GUEST:

Destini Ann Davis is a certified parenting coach, bestselling author, and speaker who helps parents create intentional, connected relationships with their children through her "Very Intentional Parenting" approach. Her TikTok has grown to over 900K followers, and she recently earned her master's in psychology.

  1. Website: https://www.destiniann.com/
  2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/destini.ann/
  3. LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/destini-davis-a44700266/
  4. Book: Very Intentional Parenting by Destini Ann Davis

RESOURCES MENTIONED:

  1. Harvard Implicit Association Test (IAT): https://implicit.harvard.edu/implicit/takeatest.html
  2. I Take My Coffee Black by Tyler Merritt: https://www.amazon.com/Take-My-Coffee-Black-Reflections/dp/1546029419
  3. Very Intentional Parenting by Destini Ann Davis

📚 PRE-ORDER ELI'S NEW BOOK: "How to Deal With Your ____, So Your Kids Don't Have To: An Encyclopedia for Ditching Your Emotional Baggage" (April 2026) 👉 https://www.attachmentnerd.com/how-to-deal-book

🎓 SECURE PARENTING PROGRAM: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/secure-parenting-program

CONNECT WITH ELI:

  1. Website: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/
  2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentnerd/
  3. TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentnerd

🎵 Music by Gold Child: https://www.goldchildmusic.com/

]]>664c6532-d9ad-4324-b942-4194a21d6f39Thu, 29 Jan 2026 09:00:00 -060001:09:39falsefull2332How To Deal With Big Kids and Bigger Feelings | with Alyssa CampbellHow To Deal With Big Kids and Bigger Feelings | with Alyssa CampbellYour kid finally learned to regulate their emotions... and then they turned 8 and it all fell apart. Sound familiar?

In this episode, Eli sits down with Alyssa Campbell—co-author of the New York Times bestseller Tiny Humans, Big Feelings and her new book Big Kids, Bigger Feelings—to unpack why the pre-teen years hit so differently (and why your biases might be making it worse).

They dive into:

  1. Why that "calm period" around age 6-7 doesn't last (and what's actually happening in your kid's brain)
  2. How to parent when your sensory needs are completely opposite your child's
  3. The difference between entitlement and dysregulation (spoiler: it's usually the second one)
  4. Why "attention-seeking" behavior is actually a need, not a want
  5. A free tool to understand your (and your kid's) unique nervous system

Whether you have neurotypical or neurodivergent kids, this conversation will change how you see those eye rolls, door slams, and "attitudes."

Resources mentioned:

  1. Take the free Sensory Quiz: seedquiz.com
  2. Big Kids, Bigger Feelings by Alyssa Campbell
  3. Tiny Humans, Big Feelings
  4. Learn more about Seed and Sew: Link

Music by Gold Child - www.goldchildmusic.com

]]>Your kid finally learned to regulate their emotions... and then they turned 8 and it all fell apart. Sound familiar?

In this episode, Eli sits down with Alyssa Campbell—co-author of the New York Times bestseller Tiny Humans, Big Feelings and her new book Big Kids, Bigger Feelings—to unpack why the pre-teen years hit so differently (and why your biases might be making it worse).

They dive into:

  1. Why that "calm period" around age 6-7 doesn't last (and what's actually happening in your kid's brain)
  2. How to parent when your sensory needs are completely opposite your child's
  3. The difference between entitlement and dysregulation (spoiler: it's usually the second one)
  4. Why "attention-seeking" behavior is actually a need, not a want
  5. A free tool to understand your (and your kid's) unique nervous system

Whether you have neurotypical or neurodivergent kids, this conversation will change how you see those eye rolls, door slams, and "attitudes."

Resources mentioned:

  1. Take the free Sensory Quiz: seedquiz.com
  2. Big Kids, Bigger Feelings by Alyssa Campbell
  3. Tiny Humans, Big Feelings
  4. Learn more about Seed and Sew: Link

Music by Gold Child - www.goldchildmusic.com

]]>e624c679-f4bf-41b7-aea2-0212f95e5ce8Sun, 18 Jan 2026 09:00:00 -060042:49falsefull2222How to Deal with Parenting When You’re Trying to Break Cycles (with My Mom, Babs Slaton)How to Deal with Parenting When You’re Trying to Break Cycles (with My Mom, Babs Slaton)What would you tell your younger mom self?

In this deeply personal first episode, Eli sits down with **Babs Slaton, MA, LPC**—fellow therapist, colleague at the PASS Center, and the original cycle breaker in Eli's family. Babs was the first person in their family system to look around at the dysfunction and say, "This feels insecure. We need to figure something out."

Babs shares the five things she wishes someone had told her when she was a young mom in the trenches—wisdom refined through decades of parenting, therapy, and watching her grandchildren thrive.

]]>What would you tell your younger mom self?

In this deeply personal first episode, Eli sits down with **Babs Slaton, MA, LPC**—fellow therapist, colleague at the PASS Center, and the original cycle breaker in Eli's family. Babs was the first person in their family system to look around at the dysfunction and say, "This feels insecure. We need to figure something out."

Babs shares the five things she wishes someone had told her when she was a young mom in the trenches—wisdom refined through decades of parenting, therapy, and watching her grandchildren thrive.

]]>857df6fc-2155-406d-a012-d62cd2ffcc16Mon, 12 Jan 2026 09:00:00 -060022:04falsefull2112Guiding Young Hearts: Helping Children Through LossGuiding Young Hearts: Helping Children Through LossIn this insightful talk, Eli explores the multifaceted concept of loss from a child's perspective, providing parents and caregivers with a comprehensive framework to understand and aid children during these challenging times. From the little losses to the big ones, discover strategies and insights to navigate these poignant moments in a child's life.

]]>In this insightful talk, Eli explores the multifaceted concept of loss from a child's perspective, providing parents and caregivers with a comprehensive framework to understand and aid children during these challenging times. From the little losses to the big ones, discover strategies and insights to navigate these poignant moments in a child's life.

]]>ccbc935b-10bb-470a-ab10-b4a269004d55Wed, 14 Jun 2023 09:00:00 -060020:51falsefull1441Mastering Your Calm: A Parents Guide to Co-RegulationMastering Your Calm: A Parents Guide to Co-RegulationIn this episode, we'll delve into calming yourself when a loved one is upset, exploring the parent-child dynamic of co-regulation and debunking misconceptions about calmness.

For full episode please become a member of the Nerd Herd. Details can be found at www.attachmentnerd.com

]]>In this episode, we'll delve into calming yourself when a loved one is upset, exploring the parent-child dynamic of co-regulation and debunking misconceptions about calmness.

For full episode please become a member of the Nerd Herd. Details can be found at www.attachmentnerd.com

]]>6e482a10-96be-4623-a3b2-e20bd376e289Mon, 22 May 2023 09:00:00 -060016:04falsefull1331How to Repair With Your Child When You Are the One Who Messed UpHow to Repair With Your Child When You Are the One Who Messed UpIn this episode, we dive deep into a very personal, yet universal, parenting experience. Our host shares her journey of miscommunication and repair with her son, revealing the raw and tender dynamics of the parent-child relationship.

We discuss how easily we can misread situations, and how a moment of jest can turn into a moment of distress. But more importantly, we explore the aftermath: the process of owning our mistakes, acknowledging the impact, and working towards mending the rupture.

We delve into the steps of making repairs, from granting space for our children to express their feelings to understanding their needs for reparation. We also highlight the importance of public acknowledgment of our mistakes, a key component of the social fabric of our lives.

Finally, we address the importance of not beating ourselves up when we falter and the need for patience as repairs may take time. This episode is a true testament to the fact that it's not about never messing up, but about how we rise and recover when we do.

So, join us on this enlightening journey, as we learn, grow, and together, continue to become better parents, one repair at a time.

]]>In this episode, we dive deep into a very personal, yet universal, parenting experience. Our host shares her journey of miscommunication and repair with her son, revealing the raw and tender dynamics of the parent-child relationship.

We discuss how easily we can misread situations, and how a moment of jest can turn into a moment of distress. But more importantly, we explore the aftermath: the process of owning our mistakes, acknowledging the impact, and working towards mending the rupture.

We delve into the steps of making repairs, from granting space for our children to express their feelings to understanding their needs for reparation. We also highlight the importance of public acknowledgment of our mistakes, a key component of the social fabric of our lives.

Finally, we address the importance of not beating ourselves up when we falter and the need for patience as repairs may take time. This episode is a true testament to the fact that it's not about never messing up, but about how we rise and recover when we do.

So, join us on this enlightening journey, as we learn, grow, and together, continue to become better parents, one repair at a time.

]]>4c8d0dfe-d2f5-4e5c-91ab-8053ad215839Wed, 17 May 2023 09:00:00 -060006:50falsebonus1221Taming Tiny Tempers: Helping Kids Manage AngerTaming Tiny Tempers: Helping Kids Manage AngerDive into this episode as we explore effective strategies for co-regulating and guiding children through their emotional journey. Discover how empathy and understanding can foster a nurturing environment that supports emotional growth, equipping kids with the tools they need to express and manage their anger in healthy ways.

Stressed by parenting struggles? I get it. That's why I created Attachment Nerd's all-in-one approach, providing expert coaching, essential resources, and a warm community.

Like many satisfied parents, you can build deep connections and overcome day-to-day hurdles. Let's embark on this journey together at Attachmentnerd.com

TRSbD9rysYlN6dxy0MGj

]]>Dive into this episode as we explore effective strategies for co-regulating and guiding children through their emotional journey. Discover how empathy and understanding can foster a nurturing environment that supports emotional growth, equipping kids with the tools they need to express and manage their anger in healthy ways.

Stressed by parenting struggles? I get it. That's why I created Attachment Nerd's all-in-one approach, providing expert coaching, essential resources, and a warm community.

Like many satisfied parents, you can build deep connections and overcome day-to-day hurdles. Let's embark on this journey together at Attachmentnerd.com

TRSbD9rysYlN6dxy0MGj

]]>d6bf6250-219c-44bb-a539-381c3a52e86aTue, 02 May 2023 09:00:00 -060008:12falsebonus1111