50 Cent had 21 questions. Now we’ve got ours. No prep, no “it depends,” and no changing your answer because the other one picked better.

More money or more time, and we split on it. A house full of company every weekend or a wide open calendar. One more day with our kids as toddlers. The ’90s without modern tech. Never cook again or never clean again, and why Christa cleans the clean house every Thursday. Spontaneous road trip versus perfectly planned vacation, plus the Paso Robles trifecta: a blown-out truck window, a melted picnic table, and a cut-open head, all in one campground. Fun parent or the one they call for advice. And a giant orange spider that has Christa in deep conversation with her AI.

Some of these got silly. A few got a lot deeper than we expected.

Next week is episode 10, and it’s our Ask Us Anything. Get your questions in to hello@bedtimebanter.com.

We’re not experts. We’re just awake.

New episodes Sundays.

Have something we should talk about? If something’s been rattling around in your head all week, send it to hello@bedtimebanter.com. We read every one.

bedtimebanter.com

@bedtimebanterpod

Turns out being in your 40s means having a catchphrase for absolutely everything. This week we went through the ones we live by, the ones we question, and the ones our kids are sick of hearing.

Leave people better than you found them. You get what you pay for, as told by a living room tattoo of a dove our daughter swears is a dragon. No is a complete sentence. Not my circus, not my monkeys. If they wanted to, they would. The ’90s classics that don’t hold up, and the one Christa says every single day to keep the kids in line. Plus the days are long but the years are short, radical change requires radical change, and the one we’d retire forever if we never had to hear it again.

Then the real question: if we could only pass one down to our kids, which would it be?

Episode 10 is our Ask Us Anything. Send your questions to hello@bedtimebanter.com.

We’re not experts. We’re just awake.

New episodes Sundays.

Have something we should talk about? If something’s been rattling around in your head all week, send it to hello@bedtimebanter.com. We read every one.

bedtimebanter.com

@bedtimebanterpod

Our boy turns 14 in April, which means a paycheck, a schedule, and a boss who isn’t us. So we went back through every job we’ve ever had.

Babysitting newborn twins at 10, back when that was apparently fine. Picking range balls for $4 an hour and a story involving a gas hose that we probably shouldn’t tell. Six weeks at Burger King under a manager with a glass eye, and the lifeguard course that got Christa out. Heavily starched denim and velour sweatsuits at Mr. Rags. A weekend radio show that started at 6 AM, sometimes straight from the club. Boxing promotions and time with Sylvester Stallone. The Apple job with the golden handcuffs, and why walking away was worth it. And how a spin bike in the back row turned into a career Christa never saw coming.

Then the real stuff: what every one of those jobs taught us, and what we want our kids to take into theirs.

Episode 10 is coming, and we’re doing an Ask Us Anything. Send your questions to hello@bedtimebanter.com. Shade about the Mr. Rags years will be returned.

We’re not experts. We’re just awake.

New episodes Sundays.

Have something we should talk about? If something’s been rattling around in your head all week, send it to hello@bedtimebanter.com. We read every one.

bedtimebanter.com

@bedtimebanterpod

Three and a half years ago we traded the mountains of northern Nevada for a state where the highest point is an overpass. We expected sunshine and the occasional alligator. We didn’t expect it to become home this fast.

This one’s a love letter to the Sunshine State. Waving at every car that passes, or you’re a monster. Neighbors who skip “do you go to church” and go straight to “which one.” A grocery store with produce that looks like it came off another planet, and the day we found out romaine actually has a taste. Humidity, the shower after the shower, and the cold snap where Drew wouldn’t turn on the heat. Frozen iguanas falling out of trees. Rocket launches from the backyard. A pond gator named Armando. A daughter who relocates turtles and tree frogs as a full-time job.

And the part we didn’t see coming: what this place did for all four of us, and whether we ever thought we’d stay.

Pictures of the rocket launch are going up on Instagram.

We’re not experts. We’re just awake.

New episodes Sundays.

Have something we should talk about? If something’s been rattling around in your head all week, send it to hello@bedtimebanter.com. We read every one.

bedtimebanter.com

@bedtimebanterpod

Football, lacrosse, volleyball, sewing, horseback riding, disc golf, and an orthodontist appointment for good measure. We swore we’d never be these parents. This week we barely looked at each other.

So Christa needed to vent before anyone got to the silver lining, and Drew met her there. Coaching a team of eight-year-olds that was more like herding cats. Dinner at 4:30 or 9:30, nothing in between. A Celsius at 8 PM and a movie that took three nights to finish. Telling our boy no on basketball, and why saying no protects the whole family. Caddying 36 holes in the Florida heat while he took third place against a field of grown men. And the hotel washcloth that never seems to make it back to the hotel.

Then the part that makes it worth it: watching them love every minute of it.

If you’ve got kids in sports, we see you. Keep the snacks coming.

We’re not experts. We’re just awake.

New episodes Sundays.

Have something we should talk about? If something’s been rattling around in your head all week, send it to hello@bedtimebanter.com. We read every one.

bedtimebanter.com

@bedtimebanterpod

We set high expectations. For ourselves, for each other, for pretty much everyone in our lives. Lately we’ve been learning which ones to hold onto and which ones to hand back to God. So we made a game of it.

Rapid fire, expectation versus reality. The family vacation that’s really just a trip. Finally getting to stay up late, and being mad if you’re awake past 10:38. Forty-five minutes of scrolling for a show one of us sleeps through anyway. Cuddling all night versus the wall of pillows. The new couch that turned into a whole new living room, and the one that showed up in 27 boxes.

Then it gets real. Marriage being 100/100, not 50/50. Why friendship as an adult is so hard. Almost six years without a drink. And why 440 square feet was the happiest we’ve ever been.

Turns out the messy, ordinary version is the good stuff.

We’re not experts. We’re just awake.

New episodes Sundays.

Have something we should talk about? If something’s been rattling around in your head all week, send it to hello@bedtimebanter.com. We read every one.

bedtimebanter.com

@bedtimebanterpod

Two episodes of our story were heavy enough. This week we lightened it up and went back to the '90s, and we're pretty sure they were better.

Calling the movie theater for showtimes. Blockbuster late fees and the shame that came with them. TGIF, Topanga, and JTT. Finding your friends by the pile of bikes and drinking out of whatever hose was closest. Christa the rink rat versus Drew and his pogo stick. Starter jackets, Dunkaroos, Pizza Hut with the chandeliers, and a Surge and Jolt doubleheader. CD binders that held 750 discs, the toothpaste trick, and the songs that still take us right back. Plus the settled debate over whether Die Hard is the greatest Christmas movie ever made. It is.

Then the real question: if we could go back, would we?

What business from our childhood needs to come back? Send it in. We're serious about this one.

No tears this time. Unless you miss Dunkaroos.

We're not experts. We're just awake.

New episodes Sundays.

Have something we should talk about? If something's been rattling around in your head all week, send it to hello@bedtimebanter.com. We read every one.

bedtimebanter.com

@bedtimebanterpod

Last time we left off at the wedding. This one fills in the sixteen years since.

A surprise pregnancy test we had to buy twice. A loss that almost convinced us to stop at one, and the baby girl who came after. A kindergarten class of 46 that turned us into homeschoolers overnight. Selling the house, buying a 42-foot fifth wheel neither of us knew how to tow, and hitting the road with two kids and Louie, the wiener dog. Then the phone call that brought us home in five days, and the six months we got with Christa's dad because of it. And finally, the move to the furthest corner of the map.

It's a long one, and some of it is heavy. There's also a grill that melted straight through a picnic table on New Year's Eve.

We're not experts. We're just awake.

New episodes Sundays.

Have something we should talk about? If something's been rattling around in your head all week, send it to hello@bedtimebanter.com. We read every one.

bedtimebanter.com

@bedtimebanterpod

Before we get into everything else, we figured we should tell you how we got here.

This one goes back to the beginning. How we met, what we each thought of one another, and whether those two accounts match. Dating. The proposal, which was a repeat of history. The wedding, and the endless humor behind it all.

Everything after the wedding is a whole other episode.

We're not experts. We're just awake.

New episodes Sundays.

Have something we should talk about? If something's been rattling around in your head all week, send it to hello@bedtimebanter.com. We read every one.

bedtimebanter.com

@bedtimebanterpod

This is a quick preview of what Bedtime Banter is going to be.

We're Drew and Christa. Married, in our forties, raising our family in Florida. Every week we sit down after bedtime and talk about the day, and somewhere in there we end up on whatever's going on in the world, because at this stage of life those two things don't really separate.

No script. No segments. Some nights it's parenting, some nights it's the news, most nights it's both and a few things in between.

We're not experts. We're just awake.

New episodes Sundays.

Have something we should talk about? If something's been rattling around in your head all week, send it to hello@bedtimebanter.com.

bedtimebanter.com

Instagram: @bedtimebanterpod