Early Care for Every Kid

Rewilding birth and empowering women | Amanda Alappat, coach and advocate

Danielle An — Thu, 26 Aug 2021 06:00:00 -0500

In this episode, Amanda Alappat, a homebirth mama, certified doula, coach, seasoned yoga teacher, joins me to discuss:

(04:30) how birthing is a pivotal experience that could color motherhood
(06:50) the importance of knowing our options
(07:40) considerations+support needed for optimal conditions preconception, during pregnancy, postpartum
(19:20) Amanda's home birth story
(28:00) physiologic birth
(31:40) Amanda's surprising and empowering first home birth
(38:00) RIE (Resources for Infant Educarers) parenting
(44:00) how we could help empower women by reclaiming birth, knowing all our options

and more.

Mentioned in this episode:

Amanda Alappat https://www.amandaalappat.com/
Amanda Alappat https://www.instagram.com/amanda_alappat/
RIE Parenting https://www.rie.org/about/ries-basic-principles/

Join the conversation:

follow earlycareforeverykid.org
connect instagram.com/earlycareforeverykid
subscribe earlycareforeverykid.captivate.fm/listen
transcript https://share.descript.com/view/VoOs1pT07lw

---

Transcript

AI-generated transcript below. Please excuse any typos or errors.

Danielle An

Wherever you are, however, your day or night's been going. I hope you feel as inspired as I am after this episode with Amanda Alappat, to take a moment, to see how we feel in our bodies and take charge of how we mother, our children and ourselves.

This is early care for every kid, a podcast for people who want to make learning, living, and loving more harmonious for everyone. I'm your host, Danielle An each week, I interview fellow parents, educators, advocates, and community leaders who care for and work with young children and families. I share their experiences, insights, and specific, actionable tips on how you could help make the world work better for everyone.

Amanda Alappat is on a mission to support and elevate women. She is a home birth mama seasoned yoga teacher and a veteran personal trainer who was once a competitive champion boxer. Amanda has two small children and an artist husband. She splits her time between New York city, their retreat, home and art gallery in the Poconos in Pennsylvania and Costa Rica.

The destination of their upcoming family retreats. Amanda believes strongly in both physiologic birth and mothering, and is the practitioner of RIE a respectful approach to parenting. She loves growing her own food. Unschooling her daughter breastfeeding her son, hosting women's circles and retreats all while cultivating sisterhood and community.

Welcome to our conversation with Amanda Alappat. I'm so grateful to have you today because you are on a mission. You are a woman, a force on a mission to support and elevate women and womanhood and motherhood, sisterhood, community rewilding. Could you please tell me how you came into this space of birthing and rewilding motherhood?

What does that mean?

Amanda Alappat

Okay, so I'll give you the summary. I got into the fitness industry 20 years ago, and that is before Instagram and before social media. And so I was one of the only women in the industry and as such, I train. Many female clients, because they look to me as opposed to big bulky men. And I had years of one-on-one with women.

And of course I would encounter pregnant women. So I got pre and postnatal certified because I wanted to make sure that what we were doing was safe. And I just fell in love working with pregnant women and new mothers. And from there, I got into yoga and I did a pre and postnatal yoga teacher training.

And within that training, the word doula came into my stratosphere. Prior to that, I never really heard of doulas, but it just seemed like this natural progression. Okay. I'm going to train a woman through her pregnancy. And now I have the skillset to support her in her birth. And then I could train her after the birth.

And so it was just this natural progression and evolution of my career. And so I became a doula and I assisted many births. And I knew through that experience, that when it came time for me to have my own children, I really wanted to have a home birth. And so four years ago, after 70 hours of labor, I gave birth to my daughter at home.

Recently, six months ago, I had my son also a home birth wildly different than the first and in in-between when I was newly pregnant with my son, I went on a women's retreat and sat in. Many circles during that week, I had sat in circle before and I actually hosted several women's circles before. Cause I always was really drawn to community and connection.

We have a backyard space in Manhattan. I would host one day women's retreats and me and my husband did many retreats. I was always hosting play dates and we were always sitting in circle. And so from there, the retreat really showed me that I need to be doing more of this. And that was right before COVID hit.

So I came back, me and my friend were like, we're going to host monthly women's circles or we're going to do all this stuff. And then the world shut down. So we started hosting them online and we still do it monthly. I just feel really called and really passionate about reminding women. That birth belongs to us and that we're currently living in a monoculture of birth, which basically means everyone's having very similar experiences.

We don't even know that we have these options and it's highly medicalized and women are very passive through the experience. And we've been fed this line that we should only want a healthy mom and a healthy baby, which is actually like code word for like, you make it out alive. If you have an alive baby in your life, that's how low the bar is grateful.

Be grateful and it's diminishes the experience. And for me, I really strongly believe that the experience is so profound and so pivotal women need to reclaim it and recognize it. The ripple effect that how a women for. Really could color how she goes into mothering, how she feels about herself, her perspective of the world, her own level of self-confidence and how she bonds with and treats her child.

So really that's where I feel my work needs to focus on.

Danielle An

Even if we are not in a maternal space. I think the culture that we are in excludes so many different options for women, because we don't know about our options. I mean, I wish I knew more about my body, about the different ways of birthing, even before I went into pregnancy or in the early stages of pregnancy naturally, I thought, okay, I'm going to do whatever my mother did, but the standards are really, truly so

low, low.

Amanda Alappat

The bar is so low. I feel like it's important to reiterate this point. You only give birth once, right? You only have like one shot. Of course, if you have multiple kids, but each birth is a singular event, you don't get a do over with mothering. If you make a mistake, you could course correct. You could do better.

Next time. You could learn from your mistakes with birth. It's one chance. That's why it's so important for women to be educated and to take some time before it happens to make sure they know what their options are, because if they don't know what their options are, they don't have any, I

Danielle An

feel like with pregnancy, the focus becomes carrying the child to term and how to ensure a healthy pregnancy.

But the focus is really just on the child inside and not even much discussion of delivery options. So how do you support in your work? The motherhood journey and the space

Amanda Alappat

around that? So I really start with preconception. Which I know for some people might be a radical idea that there's preparation and there are steps that could be taken even before you get pregnant.

Because in my perspective, you want to set yourself up for an optimal experience and the most healthiest, vibrant, beautiful, solid, healthy, robust baby. And that really starts with the state of your body. So I start with women to boost their nutrition, to as much as possible detox, their homes, eliminate harmful products, maybe investing in a water filter and air filter, right?

Like really getting yourself to a place where you create the space to call on your child. That could also look like looping in your partner, financially planning for a baby, literally clearing your home, shutting some stuff that could be a ritual where you sit in circle and you pray to your baby and you make contact with it and say, yes, I'm ready for you, please.

So preconception, I feel very strongly about my husband and I, we personally took 18 months to prepare for our first child with our second. We took about three months, but we had already implemented so much from the first baby and you want the best quality, egg, and sperm. We took almost two years to plan and prepare for our wedding, which is like a party, right.

I just don't see how, and of course, sometimes you just get pregnant. Great. But I really think there's something to be said about going in with intention and clarity and conscious.

Danielle An

Is there anything else that you might want to add to the discussions that you had, Larry, your physical space, your mental space, intentionally inviting the things that you want for the child, as well as logistical things like finance, parenting philosophy, and having your partner on board.

Is there anything else that you might want to add to

Amanda Alappat

that could be also movement exercise? Especially if a woman is sedentary or conversely working out really hard and thinking she has to kill herself at the gym, developing a movement practice. Um, thinking about your relationship with your partner, having a child is going to expose gaps in your marriage and cracks if you will.

And so what things might be coming up or what things may come up later on, where do you need to solidify? What kind of female support are you surrounded by? Do you have other friends in a similar stage of their lives? Do you have any kind of sisterhood who's supporting you? We talk about maternity leave.

What that looks like for someone like me. Who's self-employed I had two in those 18 years. Financially safe because there's no one paying my maternity leave and really whatever comes up for the woman, she wants to spend all of our time focusing on diet and eating for optimal fertility and optimal pregnancy.

That's cool. But there are so many different sort of facets to look at and examine. And what's your connection to God, right? Because there is a mystery to all of this. There is a magic to all of this, so there's many layers.

Danielle An

So preconception during the pregnancy you offer that kind of ongoing support as well as during delivery and after.

Amanda Alappat

Right. Okay. And then postpartum and then parenting. Yes. Could you

Danielle An

tell me about the birthing as well as after. Delivery, because I think physically, and I think even more mentally doing something that you never thought you could do is truly a transformational event that happens for any mother and even the father.

Could you tell us a little bit more about the importance of the support that you need afterwards?

Amanda Alappat

I find that it's a big missing piece because there is a lot of emphasis on the pregnancy. There is a lot of emphasis on the birth, and then there's really not much talk about, especially the immediate postpartum, but also the ongoing postpartum.

And even if you think about care providers, they see you at your six week mark after giving birth. And then they're like, okay, Good luck. See you when you, if you, when you get pregnant again, and six weeks is nothing. So my work is to also, hopefully in pregnancy, have the woman and her family start thinking about what kind of layers of support they have, what kind of support they want.

So that might be a postpartum doula that might be a mother-in-law or a mother to come and stay or family that might be some friends, maybe setting up a meal train for some couples. It's a baby nurse. So just thinking about what they are comfortable with, what they could afford, where they see they're going to need the most help.

Like for me, I didn't want a baby nurse because I didn't want someone sleeping in my house. I wanted to be the one to wake up with my baby, but for some other women, they really want that sleep through the night. So that would be something also, who's going to be taking care of the mother. Who's going to be feeding her.

Who's going to be tending to her needs. Who's going to be massaging her or. Checking in with her emotionally and making her feel like it's okay to rest. Who can she really trust with her baby for a half an hour or an hour? So she could recover. Who's going to be doing the laundry, grocery, shopping the dog walking.

And if the father let's say, or the partner has a week off from work or two weeks off who is going to hold space for that mother, when all of a sudden it's heard her baby alone all day, every day. So we talk about that. I also talk about postpartum nutrition. I personally feel like everyone should have some kind of bodywork or pelvic floor therapy or some kind of practice to help restore their body.

You know, in some countries that standard of care, you get like 10 sessions with the pelvic floor therapist here we don't. So, but you have to be more proactive. I could talk about with them Yoni steaming, which is a very nice practice. Some women like to have a belly bind, just something to close them up in a way.

Danielle An

Okay. Hang on. What is Yoni steaming?

Amanda Alappat

think it is, you can think of it as a facial for your vagina and your vulva. So basically you would get a collection of herbs that you bring to a boil and then you place it in a bowl. And there are like Yoni steaming stools, which I have. But before I had one, I would put the bowl in the toilet. And then sit backwards on the toilet so I could lean over and it's basically wonderful.

You know, it has a lot of therapeutic benefits and healing, and again, it's like the intention, right? Like I'm setting an intention for healing and I'm carving out this time and I'm prioritizing my self-care and look for it. If you have a beautiful, wonderful birth without tearing, but your pelvic floor and your lady parts still definitely took a, I don't want to say that.

Yeah, definitely. We're pushed and stretched. I'm just

Danielle An

curious because I come from. An Asian culture. And in my two postpartum experiences, I was advised by my mother to have a postpartum. I don't want to say doula, but a postpartum caretaker for me and the baby. And I don't know how I might have survived without that.

My mother was not here for, especially my first birth. And I thought that was mostly like an Asian cultural thing. So this is really interesting for me. Cause I feel like in mainstream, I'll say America, it's not widely talked about or discuss the postpartum care, taking and recovery for mothers. There's a lot of focus on feeding diaper changes, bouncing

Amanda Alappat

back, get back to work, sleep, train your baby as if nothing happened as if within six to 12.

You're expected to, you're supposed to. Yeah, I do think other coaches, teachers do a much better job. My husband's Indian and they have a lot of aerobatic traditions, certain massages and just same kind of thing. Like another woman coming to care for intents of the mother. Whereas in this country, unfortunately, it's a Bismal, it's an abomination really of what's the emphasis on getting back into shape, exterior, external exterior.

It's no wonder that so many women have pelvic floor disorders and continents. Of course, of course. Like there was no tending to, there was no healing. There was no time for recovery. And you know, especially a lot of women are now isolated without any kind of support doing it on their own. Especially if you have multiple children.

So part of my work is to tell families there

these are even options. So I'm curious, why do you think these are such mysterious things that people don't even know to ask about, to inquire about, to get curious about as options? Why do you think that is? Why is this kind of information not widely spread among expecting mothers?

The post people want the truth? Yes, please. I think the whole experience from preconception to postpartum has been co-opted by the medical system, the obstetric medical system and the allopathic system, which is a for-profit business tending to let's say, look for pathologies or interference or manipulation control, a lot of benefits of disconnect, right?

Do they want a woman in their full power showing up to birth wild and loud and moving around and primal? Or do they want a woman that's passive and medicated and, um, and obedient. And unfortunately there's so many women experiencing traumatic births and then they're handing this baby and it's okay.

Good luck. And then breastfeeding is usually challenging if they have any kind of tearing, right? No one is really serving them or supporting them. It's a damn shame. One of the teachers that I learned from, she says, if you want to look at the health of the planet, look at the health of mothers. And yes, I know so many women that are suffering are really suffering.

Danielle An

Yeah. Even from my own personal experiences and observations, when the mother is not in a good spot, physically, mentally, whether it's from a recent birth and recovery and traumatic birth, or even a normal, whatever is called a normal birth, it's just a really extraordinary event in a person's life. It's a physical, emotional experience.

So I think that whole life stage without that kind of support or mothering of the mother, there's no way that a mother. Be in a space to provide care and nurture the child that needs the mother to survive

Amanda Alappat

because they really set the tone for the family. The mother usually sets the tone for the family and look, I know all of this and I still didn't have enough support in my most recent birth.

And it really, it...

Creating lasting connections w/ kids | Rev. Susan Nason, The Parent Whisperer NY

Danielle An — Wed, 18 Aug 2021 11:00:00 -0500

Rev. Susan Nason, parent educator and founder of the Parent Whisperer NY, joins me to discuss:

(07:15) Why parents need to develop communication skills
(10:20) How to establish trust and boundaries
(13:50) Why it’s crucial to acknowledge feelings sooner than later
(22:32) “Loved people love.”
(30:00) Kids seeking attention or connection?
(32:51) The most foundational (and often simple) thing parents could do to nurture kids’ sense of self-worth (role play) + what happens for us when we do that
(34:35) How we might better connect with strangers

and more.

Susan is a mother, grandmother, and educator helping parents create loving cycles and lasting connections with their children.

Mentioned in this episode:

The Parent Whisperer NY http://theparentwhispererny.com/
Contact Rev. Susan Nason rev.susannason@gmail.com
“How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk” https://amzn.to/3mbxtcF
“Siblings Without Rivalry” https://amzn.to/3mdFmOy
5-min Loving Kindness Metta Meditation https://youtu.be/Y-z4HqdTQFw

* Affiliate Disclaimer: I may earn a small commission when you make a qualifying purchase at the amazon.com links above at no additional cost to you. Thanks.

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connect instagram.com/earlycareforeverykid
subscribe earlycareforeverykid.captivate.fm/listen

How to create space for yourself without the guilt

Danielle An — Wed, 11 Aug 2021 01:00:00 -0500

In this episode of early care for every kid, we discuss:

(00:50) How I reconciled not getting it all done sometimes
(02:23) How you can feel good about giving yourself space/care
(06:29) Questions to ask yourself when deciding what’s important now

Join the conversation:

follow earlycareforeverykid.org
connect instagram.com/earlycareforeverykid
subscribe earlycareforeverykid.captivate.fm/listen
transcript https://share.descript.com/view/pD1r4VazjBa

Transcript:

AI-generated transcript below. Please excuse any typos or errors.

Danielle An (00:00)

In this episode, I want to talk about giving ourselves more space without the guilt to take care of ourselves first, especially because we are caregivers to very little children who are always watching. This is early care for every kid, a podcast for people who want to make learning, living, and loving more harmonious for everyone.

I'm your host, Danielle An each week, I interview fellow parents, educators, advocates, and community leaders. The care for and work with young children and families. I share their experiences, insights, and specific, actionable tips on how you could help make the world work better for everyone. Welcome to our conversation.

Danielle An (00:50)

Hi I was away last week and despite wanting to be disciplined and consistent about podcast episodes, I myself also just take the week without giving any advance notice. I felt a little guilty and frustrated and frankly was very cranky and myself to be skipping an episode. But I do want to talk about how I've come to feel okay about it all

After taking an unplanned last minute road trip to visit my in-laws for the first time since the pandemic, I wasn't quite sure I was going to be able to record and release this episode or any episode, but I take a moment to think about is that really important right now for me this week, especially cause I wasn't feeling very well. I decided that it's okay. Let's skip a week and come back the week after. So here we are.

And it just reminded me to maybe encourage you to give ourselves, give yourself some more space. Without guilt to intentionally take care of ourselves first and recharge as needed. So that would, we could be at a healthier, more regulated space where we are feeling generous and happy to share what we do and do it with joy and gladness.

So when we are with our kids, we're not erupting at them. Something really minute.

Danielle An (02:23)

I want to talk about the mindset shift as I decided, okay, this week I will skip an episode because it might demonstrate a little bit about what a lot of caregivers, a lot of mothers do, especially when it comes to personal work and family lives.

We set ourselves up for failure a lot of times, because there are too many things that need to get done that don't. Fit on our plate neatly. And we are not meant to do all the things on our own without any support, even before the coronavirus and during a pandemic. And. As we are perhaps slowly getting to a safer place and still a tenuous place where there's still a lot of uncertainty.

There's a lot of clarity how we are not individually meant to do it all alone, breakfast, lunch, and dinner, and all the stacks, all the nursing or pumping and the bottle washing and feeding or a sanitizing that needs to happen. And just keeping the house. Clean enough or making a living doing work that will.

Support your family financially, be able to afford a toy book, a summer camp program, or a caretaker. Keep your family safe. Keep them engaged or feed a newborn or a baby while also. Wiping a toddlers, but, and also give the toddler a bath while also preparing dinner. And at the same time, reading a book and maybe putting another child to sleep or plan birthday parties, we were never meant to have 10 arms and do it all alone at the same time in one season, the point is we have a lot going on, even just as caretakers.

Which in itself is a full-time job, whether you're paid to do that kind of care giving or not. If on top of that, when you have income earning work that needs to happen or elder care that needs to happen or taking care of your relationship, if you have a partner or self-development, whatever it is, we cannot fit all that in one day in 24 hours. Or in one week.

I think it is really important to also remind herself that we are animals. We have our human bodies that need rest and food and sleep and connection so that we can do the things that fill us up and also share. That kind of excitement and joy and life Venus with our family, our loved ones and our community.

Well, I used to have a hard time rearranging priorities and timelines for work projects for my home, my family, or myself, feeling the things that I had planned to do, whether it was because I had set the expectation for myself or because it was set by other people. Deliver, but I think I have gotten better at recognizing that it's okay.

Sometimes that the world will not blow up. At least in my sphere. It does not always have dire long lasting consequences. So I hoped this might be a quick reminder to you if you're listening that if you're feeling like you're failing at a lot of things and you're dropping so many balls and you're not living up to who you had thought you would be or what you would be doing, it's okay.

Sometimes to take a deep breath first and let certain things roll off your shoulder and just stretch yourself out and breathe a little bit because.

If you saw a friend who was struggling and overwhelmed or burnt out, really running on fumes, you would probably be more tender and gracious, forgiving, and encouraging towards them.

Danielle An (06:29)

So I've tried to see how I might help myself in that way to remember that. Oh, it's okay. You know, you're doing great. That's enough for today and let yourself rest and do the rest tomorrow. Just having the intention of what I'm not going to do today and what I will do today and what I will ask somebody else to do.

I know we talk a lot about putting on an oxygen mask on yourself first, but I think the first time I heard how important it is for mothers, especially to take care of themselves was I think. I want to say fifth grade in my elementary school in Korea and my home economics teacher, I think that's what it was.

We had home economics back then and she had said, moms have to take care of themselves first and that you have to eat well and take care of your body at that time. For some reason, I was gross. I thought that was such a self-indulgent idea at that time, but I recognize many decades later, how. Wise and true.

That is. And just from my own experience, I'm no good to anybody. If I feel like I'm burning myself in service of my kids and for whatever reason, if they seem ungrateful, if I did something extra special for them, whether it was creating a Halloween costume for them and they suddenly changed their mind, I would just get so angry.

And that's not the intention that we do these things for. I realize I was probably doing that for validation and recognition. Oh, I'm a mom. Thank you so much. I appreciate it. And while I encourage and teach that kind of gratitude and recognizing what other people did for you, the intention. Yeah. To do things out of love, not for the validation.

Look how much sacrifice I'm making for you. Like not sleeping and doing all these things for you. And if you don't recognize it, I'm going to boil up. So I think as mothers, we do so much, not always because we're asked, but because we put it on ourselves and I think. Wanted to talk about the real quick, and I'm sure there are other examples that you could think of, uh, in your own lives.

And I invite you to question how much of these things are really necessary right now is there is something that I can just take off for now, is this really necessary and feel free to let yourself off the hook as long as it doesn't cause harm to other people. Of course, if you happen to find yourself in a place where you feel completely alone, or like you're in an endless loop of all the things I need to get done and you're failing at Getty, all of it done.

Please remember you are never meant to do it all alone and you should perhaps consider shedding some of those responsibilities and letting other people. Including your very young toddlers to take over some things I know that toddlers are capable of and happy to take over some of the cleaning jobs. So even if they don't do it quite the way that you might want to please remember to ask for help, whenever you can.

And take good care of yourself first so that you could be who you want to be. Thanks for joining me, Danielle An for this episode of early care for every kid. Connect with me on Instagram @ earlycareforeverykid. You can also hit the follow button wherever you're listening, to subscribe to the podcast and listen to all the episodes so far. Till next time, take care.

Creating a supportive learning environment for kids and teachers | Precious Hallman, educator and author

Danielle An — Wed, 28 Jul 2021 03:00:00 -0500

Precious Hallman, educator, mother, and author based in Memphis, TN, joins me to discuss:

(02:06) path to becoming an educator
(08:30) ongoing support and structure teachers need to be effective and stay motivated
(14:55) teaching and parenting during the pandemic
(17:30) tips for getting parents and kids engaged and invested in learning
(21:40) what makes a great teacher/mentor?
(31:25) measuring a child's growth/learning + pros/cons of testing
(39:13) tips for recharging as a busy working parent
(40:40) resource for parents and children during and beyond the pandemic

and more.

Mentioned in this episode:

Precious Hallman http://preciousmorganhallman.com/
Parents • Children • Home: Creating A Supportive Learning Environment During A Pandemic & Beyond https://earlycareforeverykid.captivate.fm/preciousbook
Stillman College https://stillman.edu/

Join the conversation:

follow earlycareforeverykid.org
connect instagram.com/earlycareforeverykid
subscribe earlycareforeverykid.captivate.fm/listen
transcript https://share.descript.com/view/pD1r4VazjBa

Transcript:

AI-generated transcript below. Please excuse any typos or errors.

Precious Hallman is an educator author mother, and advocate for equity for all children. She currently teaches fourth grade science in Memphis, Tennessee, where she resides with her husband and their two sons. Recently, she published her first book, Parents, Children, Home, Creating a Supportive Learning Environment During a Pandemic and Beyond. As many parents with young children who cannot get vaccinated just yet, have anxiety over the upcoming school year and perhaps anxiety over the past school year. I hope this episode and her book can be a helpful resource and some comfort for you. We discuss her path and training to becoming an educator and her experiences as a teacher and a mother during the pandemic.

We also talk about specific things teachers can do to get ongoing support and professional development, to build trust, communication, and accountability for themselves had students and families and how we, the public might recognize and value the work educators do every day.

This is early care for every kid, a podcast for people who want to make learning, living, and loving more harmonious for everyone. I'm your host, Danielle An. Each week, I interview fellow parents, educators, advocates, and community leaders. Who care for and work with young children and families. I share their experiences, insights, and specific, actionable tips on how you could help make the world work better for everyone.

Welcome to our conversation with Precious Hallman.

Welcome Precious. You have a passion for it, children and all people. And you've been an educator for 17 years. How did you come to seek out or fall into education as a career?

Well, originally, as I mentioned before, I was a biology major. I always had a passion about science and animals and everything that involves science.

And it was a huge conflict with being a college athlete and traveling so much for my first two years of undergrad, my freshman year. Sophomore year that's when I realized, okay, this is not going to work with having labs at night and I'm not here. So I then switched my major. I changed my major at the speaking with my parents and they were fine with it.

And I knew that I already loved children. I love working with them from many years of Sunday school and vacation Bible school and working with children in my community and also in community. Activities. And so I'm like, well, why don't I go? Why don't I become a teacher? Um, I love teaching. I love facilitating. I love people. And so that's how I came to become an education major.

In your undergrad years. Is there a lot of hands-on interaction and hands-on in classroom training as part of the curriculum to become a teacher?

Yes. And at Stillman College, they had a really renowned program educational program in the practicum years in which you had to actually complete a practicum in every single area.

So even PE because they were saying, what if you go to a small area and you're at a school where you have to teach during the day, you also have to teach PE at some point during the day. So it was a glad I had the practicum with physical education. I had a practicum. With special needs children, actually functional skills where you have to teach them just the basics, like drinking out of straw.

So I had a practicum with them as well. And so each practicum will last anywhere from six to eight weeks, where you have an experience in all sorts of classes, you have to have a practicum and music where I was working with a music teacher all day with students and just learning the different instruments and notes.

It was a wide variety because they were saying, okay, you never know. What your experience is going to be out. Like once you get a job as a teacher. And so I really loved that part because it made sure that you were prepared no matter what direction in which your educational career went in, you would be prepared.

You are a fourth grade science teacher right now. So I understand that your biology and your science and love for nature and animals probably played into this specialization. Do teachers, especially in elementary school, do they get to normally choose their specializations? Or is it assigned,

I would say early as assigned, but they will ask you, which you prefer. You know, sometimes it's just what they have available and you're trying to get your foot in the door. So you may just choose to teach reading or math, or you may have to teach all of the content area, which I had to do a couple of times throughout my career, but. Most part, you know, they give you the opportunity to choose.

And then once you choose that, sometimes you may end up having to move. In my case, my first year I taught first grade for a semester. And so I taught all subjects, but then it was a K eight school and my principal really wanted to keep me and he was like, okay, so the next year. Sixth grade AP class available for you.

And at that time I was teaching reading language arts and he was like, well, you will have this advanced placement class and you know, you'll have a couple of others, but he was saying, that's all I have. So do you want that? And I was like, sure, I'll take it. And so that's how I. Moved from teaching all subjects to Dan teach and reading, and then now in science, so kind of full circle with everything that I actually love, you know, the ELA and literature piece, and then also the science.

Yeah.

And I think that's such a, a necessary skill for teachers to learn. Uh, in their training and also as they are teaching out in the real world, because like you said, you really never know which community you might find yourself in and what the particular community's needs might be, whether it's grade level or subject matter.

I understand from our previous conversation that you also come from a family of educators and community leaders. Could you tell me a little bit more about.

Well, my father, um, he was a long-term history, high school history teacher and coaches. Well, but he has a passion for history. And my mother is, well, my mother has taught primarily in a church setting.

And most recently she teaches a, um, now that she's retired from social work, she teaches a parenting class. And so what it does is really preparing parents. You know, helping them to become better parents, but also helping them to understand their children at all ages. Because the parents that come to her program, they have children ranging from age five all the way up to age 18.

And so just really, we try to keep them connected. Cause you know, once I children become teenagers, it seems like they're, you know, we're out of touch. With where they are at that time and what their interests are, you know, as they get older, they change. And so that program is really close to and dear to her heart right now, as she's helping them in that community.

And, and you know, it's also an opportunity for them to have a family meal every night cause they provide the, a meal on the night. So they sit down as a family. Which is something they may not do if they're at home. And so they have a family style meal and then they break out and go to their own individual classes and then come back.

Um, my dad actually was an educator for 30 plus years in some form or another. He went from being a history teacher to being a school counselor. And then he also transitioned into administration as assistant principal and principal. So I always had that love. And then now. Cousins that are teachers across the United States.

There are teachers and loving the career. So it's like, as you stated, it's throughout my family,

I think the desire to be of service and, and just natural curiosity and love for people, children. I think that is probably the greatest driving force for somebody to want to become a teacher and to teach and lead and mentor.

You are on the instructional leadership team. So what kind of ongoing support is essential for teachers as they continue to learn and grow alongside their own students.

I think really just having someone there that you can lean on for a lot of teachers, you know, they don't necessarily want to go to their building administration, their principal, their assistant principal, and say, well, I'm really struggling in this or for them to come in and see that they're really struggling with it.

And then feel like they're. Inadequate, but, you know, to some point, so I feel like just having an advisor or a coach, and that also called at times called a manager, someone that you can actually go through and say, okay, where you come into my classroom and will you just observe this part of my lesson and give me feedback?

You know, I think it's really just having a relationship with someone where, you know, okay, this person is not judging me. You're not coming in, you know, to try it. Get me or give me this feedback just so they can cross off a box, but actually having someone that actually cares about my progression as a team.

You know, cause as educators, educators want to be the very best educators they are. And I think many people may not understand that, but teachers are constantly critiquing themselves. The feedback that they get from someone that they know that genuinely cares about the students and about their progression as a teacher is key.

And so that's what the instructional leadership team allows us to do. It allows me to support teachers at my school who teach the science subject, but maybe not. Right. And just trying to figure out the ins and out of education, the nuances, you know, managing their time. Some of it is just time management and some of them is just preparation.

So it's different parts to their career that they may be struggling with at that moment. Um, one that they know, um, that it also teaches because I'm a teacher as well, so they know, okay. She understands what I'm going through. Either I've been there before, or it may be something that I'm actually struggling with right now.

And so having the opportunity to go in, give them positive feedback. And then walking with them through the process to improve in that particular area. So I think that that's the biggest thing when it comes to supporting the teacher, having someone that they can always go to and ask the questions or get feedback, or don't want just to, um, sometimes it's just venting frustrated.

I had a frustrating day having someone that I can go and talk to and get it all out and then just start over fresh. The veer. I think that's the most important thing.

Would you say that all schools provide that kind of internal support system among teachers and peer groups? Or is this unique to your school?

I think every school system has some version of it, right? It may have a different name. I know most new teachers are given and mentor teacher, but that may even, you know, after their first or second year. And so it's important for them to be able to have this throughout their career. Even for me being an educator for 17 years, I need that as well, because you never really reached a point where you think, you know, People can tell you that, but there's still areas in which you were struggling with.

And the students are different these days. The children that we have these days are totally different from children before in the eighties and the nineties and the four then, and even in 2000, they're, you know, they're different. They play a lot of video games and maybe watch them or TV as opposed to children in the past, spent a lot of time outside.

And so you have to understand the generation as well, that your team. And so I think that most school system has, and maybe not so much in maybe the rural areas, those smaller towns, like my hometown, but in most of the cities and inner city schools, they have that support throughout a teacher's career where they always have that accountability.

And I think that kind of accountability and also a support network where you feel like you can safely go and seek feedback without fear of it affecting your performance review or job security. Right. Right.

What kind of advice might you give to teachers who seek that kind of mentorship or support who may not feel like they have that in their current school system?

For them to advocate for themselves to seek out that kind of mentorship and relations.

Probably I would tell them to start where they are, start with those teachers. Like maybe friends that they have that teach. Maybe not even in that same district, maybe in another state, two of my best friends teach in two different days. I'm in Tennessee. One of them is in Alabama. The one is in Mississippi. So they may want to start with those people they know within the district or not. And even those teachers that they have formed relationships with because like my school we're like one big family. And so you can go to anywhere. But you think that may have something down there, you may not something that you might be struggling and maybe they've mastered.

So I was saying also those communities within their school with teammates, or maybe teachers that may teach that same subject, but in different grades. Maybe in the K two teachers may be teaching something that maybe the three, five teacher needs to master is wellness. So I think just networking within your school or networking within your school system, because when we have professional development, as we talked about I've facilitated for before, there are teachers in my sessions that are from schools all over the district.

And so even though we're all in the same district, we're all at different schools. So that's the opportunity to network as well, but you can start have your own group. Now that we're using Microsoft team, you can have a team created where you add those teachers from other schools and you all have the opportunity to get together maybe once a week or biweekly, or even once a month.

And so I would say, just try networking with other teachers in your area or that, you know, I think that's great advice. I think begin where you are and seek out the people that you can connect with with that same goal.

I think that's great advice then the pandemic has made remote learning the go-to and an actual, a very useful tool.

I wanted to ask you how that's been going for you this past year in whether you're in the school room or if you're behind a screen as well.

Well, it's been going well and funny, you should ask that because I just completed my. Week is going back into in-person learning. And so, um, congratulations. So we started here in Memphis.

We started in August 31st, which is about three weeks later than we would have started. And so we were all virtual the entire time up into last week. And for me, I'm a big component of form of relationships with parents and students throughout my career. Mainly after I became a parent, I realized the importance of having that support and the parents having a good relationship with the teacher, because it's going to benefit the child all the time throughout the year.

They have a much more successful school year. If they have that support. And so my main thing has been that relationship trying to build that because the students show up when you, I have a relationship with your teacher and your mom or your dad and your teacher have a relationship they're going to be there consistently every day.

They're going to be logging in. They're going to be excited about learning. They're going to have that accountability piece as to turning in their work and really striving to do their best. And we had finally mastered teaching from home. And then now we're back in the school, but we're still not, you know, walking around teaching, we're still teaching online.

So now we have students in the building and we also have students that are at home because those parents are opted. So for their children to learn virtually this year, the school district is honoring that for the rest of the year. And so I love that, especially for my own boys. What would they prefer?

They wanted to stay home. And so I was glad that I could do that. Cause I know that's not the reality for every parent or every educator. So now that we're in the building, you know, it's our new normal, but I would say that we had a successful first week, day.

That kind of consistency and accountability at home and engagement from the family to make it not like, Hey, did you do your schoolwork?

Let me see. Not like a controlling command, kind of watching over your shoulder, but it's a way to keep the conversation going. The engagement and joy for learning also so that the child doesn't feel like he or she does not have the support at home, if they needed help.

How do you ensure that the parents are aware of any issues that could be prevented and how do we foster that environment?

How do you get the parents engaged?

I will speak as a teacher and also as a parent. Yes, please. So I think as a parent, you know, so that you don't sing, like you're being that helicopter parent or standing over their shoulders, I would say have a regular conversation with your kids, maybe doing dinner, you know, start by asking them how was their day, what was the best part of your day and why?

And just having that regular easy breezy conversation. Damn, you will see them start to open up. But of course, you're going to have to ask questions, especially if you have a teenager, like I do you have to ask those questions that will lead to an open ended question? How or why questions otherwise you'll get yes, no.

And you know, that's it. So asking those questions and being genuinely interested in what they're doing, you know, if they have...

Teaching basketball and lessons for life | Michael Deutsch, founder of Hands On Hoops

Danielle An — Wed, 21 Jul 2021 00:30:00 -0500

Michael Deutch, basketball coach and founder of Hands On Hoops, a youth basketball program, joins me to discuss:

(02:12) what is the Hands On Hoops program?
(03:17) on learning to be part of a team, a community
(05:07) transferrable skills from basketball to real life
(08:04) using his platform to help the community
(16:32) how traditional gender roles harm men also
(18:23) on transitioning to more personally fulfilling work
(25:30) the power of "word of mom"
(27:39) the magic words

and more.

Mentioned in this episode:

Hands On Hoops https://handsonhoops.com/ | handsonhoopsnyc@gmail.com
Coach John Wooden https://coachwooden.com/
Coalition for the Homeless https://www.coalitionforthehomeless.org/

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subscribe earlycareforeverykid.captivate.fm/listen
transcript https://share.descript.com/view/gAxxvdI2Lon

AI-generated transcript below. Please excuse any typos or errors.

What could we learn from the game of basketball? Today, I'm joined by Michael Deutsch, founder of Hands On Hoops, a basketball program based in New York City. Besides being a coach. Michael is a father, an entrepreneur, and an active community leader. We talk about his path and inspiration for creating a basketball program for our kids.

The transferable skills that young children and families take away. And how he shows up as a leader and role model, not only for his daughters, but for so many in our company.

This is early care for every kid, a podcast for people who want to make learning, living, and loving more harmonious for everyone.

I'm your host, Danielle An. Each week, I interview fellow parents, educators, advocates, and community leaders. Who care for and work with young children and families. I share their experiences, insights, and specific, actionable tips on how you could help make the world work better for everyone. Here's my conversation with Coach Mike today.

Coach Mike, Michael Deutsch founder of Hands On Hoops based in New York City. I am so glad to be talking to you today, coach, because you really do embody what a true coach and role model would look like and you teach what's really important in instilling in our kids. So welcome to the show.

Thank you so much, Danielle.

Really nice to be here.

I'm so excited. I just want to share that I first came across you through our local New York City, Facebook parenting group review. One of the moms who would normally not leave any reviews, had raving reviews about you and how you were engaging with the children and how you came and made it so easy.

So Hands On Hoops is for children between the ages of two to six. Is.

Well, actually the program is for kids between ages two through 17.

Okay. Please tell me about Hands On Hoops.

Sure. Hands On Hoops is a kids program. It's a basketball and transferable skills program where kids learn to share the basketball.

Be a great teammate. Build a positive attitude, listen to instructions and apply them, learn through having fun and also learn core basketball skills on an adjustable basket. So we have all kinds of classes throughout. New York City and also virtual classes, right? The world. We just did a virtual class in Israel.

And is that because of COVID times?

I would say it's because. For every parent has zoom on their laptop and zoom has made it so easy, but I would say COVID has been a spark, for parents to find something for their kids to do while at home.

Right. And I find that consistent in how you show up in our community.

You find ways to offer support, not just to obviously teaching children basketball skills, but also to the parents. When my younger child, when he was a three-year old and I think 2018, I just recently saw some pictures that popped up on my phone. He was an itty-bitty and he was. Not the best at waiting for his turn in line and always very eager and physical.

I noticed that you were crouching down for his eye level patiently guiding him to take turns and instill a team spirit.

Yeah, it is about that. It's about transitioning a toddler age. Think about it. A kid has been getting all the attention. A child's been getting all the attention. So now they're in a class with a group of kids.

They're studying every other kid, their insecurities come out. But when you throw that team concept at the kids and start to express, Hey, what is a team? Everyone? Oh, a team means we work together. We help each other and we share the basketball. So now it's that good feeling of being this team and not having all the focus on myself.

I'm now going to focus on every other child in the class and it takes a child out of their head. Right. And the insecurity goes away because a team is stronger than an individual.

So these are part of what you call transferable skills. That's right. Yeah. And what were you seeing in your personal, or I guess professional life that led you to believe in the importance of these transferable skills from basketball to real life, personal life?

I was doing this with my dad, but my dad had me playing basketball when I was about three years old. And unfortunately we didn't have a basket that was lower and more kid friendly. It was the regular basket. So my dad, he actually had me learning a basketball skills, pure basketball skills. Which I apply to a classes as well, but as I got older, I started to read more books.

I started to read books about John Wooden, the greatest basketball coach, ever, his team, UCLA, the UCLA Bruins college basketball team. They won 10 championships, seven in a row. So he was talking about the importance of a team. And how working together is critical, giving your best, trying your hardest.

Those are two of the most important things that a kid could learn giving it your best, trying your hardest. So I tried to take what Coach Wooden was talking about and bring it to real life with kids. And I realized I was also the captain of my team in high school. I just realized that it was about, we, it wasn't about me and that's what made our team successful.

So the books, the teams that I played on. That all had a role in imparting the knowledge to the kids currently.

So you were in athletics through high school. And did you also play in college or?

No,

I didn't play college ball, but I played soccer, basketball and baseball throughout my early years to a high school year.

Being on all those teams had a tremendous impact on my life.

And how would you say being on those team sports helped you in your personal life specifically?

Well, that's interesting because it really did help me in my personal life because I just realized there are a lot of people compare themselves to others and I just, I've always taken a mindset of.

We, how can we do it together? So instead of being a quote unquote seller where everything's about, I it's about we, and that's the way I've always lived. My life it's narrative. I've never been the one to sit there and dominate a room about, I am this. I am that. No, it's about we work. We do. That's bigger than us.

How can we help the homeless people? I started a program called homeless helpers.

So that's another thing. I also am active in our local community, even online. And besides sharing information about your basketball Hands On Hoops program, you are always seeking ways to connect to people and provide ways for people who might be interested in helping other community members.

By offering chances to donate or even coordinate donation, pickup or drop off. How did you come to be interested in people experiencing homelessness?

So I was at a, what was it? A super bowl party a couple of years back. And I started speaking with a guy and he was telling me about, uh, Coalition for the homeless, how he goes out Tuesday nights in event that coalition for the homeless supplies to him, they also supply the food.

So he goes out and he feeds people who are experiencing homelessness. So it's every Tuesday night and 50 times a year. And he also goes to two shelters and listen, I have a pulse. I get it. Yes. There was an, is a serious problem in New York city. So hearing him speak, thinking to myself, wait a second. I've built up this brand with parents through my social media.

And through basketball and kids, soy thinking, wait a second, we could work together. He and I could work together. I could supply him with all the clothes and he could give clothes and feed the homeless. And it was as simple as that. And it got me so excited and jacked up. I had to jump in the water ahead first.

And that was it. Bang, let's go.

It seems to me that one of the consistent threads is team spirit. Understanding it's not all about your strengths or your personal individual victories, but also just understanding that it's a team effort. The team wins. It's not just your personal, not about me or I, and even when people are experiencing, uh, difficulties that may not necessarily be their personal flaws or faults. Right? So you are in a position to see that it is more of a community, like a team effort when one person is vulnerable, the whole team is vulnerable. Yeah.

That's true. So true. That vulnerability is an opportunity and it's an opportunity for people to lift that person up.

And it's not something that I'm just sitting here saying I've seen that happen so many times in my life. One of the things that I'm part of, I'm part of a man, the men's team has been great because it's a bunch of men who are on a we're on a call now. Cause it's zoom related, but we were meeting in person.

And I've seen men countless amounts of time get lifted up when they had a problem. When I had a problem, when I had issues going on, everyone else was asking me questions was giving me their advice. If I wanted advice. And I have seen that work so many times. And again, it gets back to teams.

Would you say that there's a lot of pressure to be perfect and strong, especially for boys and men.

Yeah. Cause I find that I personally find that the pressure to be perfect and not just seem perfect outwardly, but even to have those expectations for yourself, women and girls feel this too. But I think especially for. Boys and men, they have an idea of what perfection may seem. That's perhaps a little different from what girls and women feel.

What would you say about that?

Yes, absolutely. Hey, look, that could have started when they were younger. When I was younger, I was definitely very conscious of myself, really young, and I find that even with my kids, I have to. So I let them know. They don't have to be perfect. So I love them. They don't have to be perfect.

And when they're not perfect, it's okay. We can just laugh about laugh seriously. No, no problem. It's okay. And it's really worked well.

Can you give me an example of what perfection might mean for your, you have two daughters, correct?

Yeah. I have a 14 year old and an eight year old.

What is their idea of perfection that you are seeing?

I feel like with my 14 year old, we've gotten past that she can make mistakes. There are times where we all make mistakes and I'll make a mistake. And let's say I was late two, three minutes late. And I gave her a time. What I'll do is right in front of them, just to clean up, it's called clean up, clean up for me being late right there.

I'll do some jumping jacks and then make it fun. And so we goof goof around so that not to take it so seriously. But also remind like, Hey, I should have been on time and I should have been my word. Right.

So acknowledging, recognizing whatever it was that perhaps needed correction or addressing just the recognition of that and not taking it so seriously, like a character flaw.

Right,

right, right. Exactly. It's not like a crime has been committed, but. If it was something that was really big in my life or their life and we were late or, or we weren't our word or my daughters weren't prepared for school, it would be something important. It would be maybe their grade would be effected or, and again, even if there are bad grades, we'll move past it.

It's not the end of the world. It's, we'll move past it. We'll figure things out and figure out a ways to study better ways. I remember when my daughter, she didn't get her, her homework in, or she forgot to hand it in. We had conversations about that and the conversations were really meaningful to her and it changed the way she did things.

They weren't beat up verbally for doing something wrong. It's Hey, let's discuss it and see if she can come to a conclusion from our conversation and she could be better at it, or we'll just do better next time. And it worked this one instance, which changed my daughter's way of doing her homework and taking notes and being prepared.

Right. I love hearing you say we had a discussion of how we. Do better next time. I love the, we that's coming through there where it's not an actually having discussions on the tools that she might be able to use next time. So she can develop that for herself, even without someone watching over her. I love that.

Yeah. Going back to more of the. Perfectionistic ideas of what maybe you yourself or society may have for men. Could you speak a little bit more to that

for men as hunters, quote, unquote hunters, I would say there's definitely a pressure on men to provide for their families. And to still live that prototype of a life where men are providing and making money and paying for everything and women are taking care of the kids.

And I would say a lot of the pressures for men are related to that

deep down like a hunter for the family protection provider security. I would agree with that. And

shame shame is on the other side. When men don't come through the way they think they should then change, takes over. Did you

ever struggle with that cow to make it work financially for your family?

Oh, no doubt. No doubt. Uh, I, you know, I wasn't doing what I love. And that set me back. That totally set me back. I was in a business and wasn't really happy with it. I had a partner and I even worked for a company for awhile and it was always that pressure of, Hey, the money's not the money that I expect to be making.

And I'm not even doing what I love and, you know, we only have one life here and well, but wait, I have this rent to pay and I have these expenses to pay. And how am I going to transition? How am I going to turn things around to where, you know, I wake up with a smile on my face and I had that for awhile.

Absolutely. I had that too, before I was able to find the basketball, the basketball program and come to that realization and take that first action. On basketball. I know

you were in a corporate environment professionally before you transitioned. Yes. Tell me a little bit more about that process of identifying what gave you that spark and feeling of purpose and joy that made you feel like it was worthwhile to wake up in the morning, do what you do.

I listened to a lot of podcasts to find some inspiration did that morning and night really looking for inspiration. And I found it, it was about 10 and a half years ago. A friend of mine, he said to me, Hey, you should be doing what you always love to do my nephew. He needs to learn about basketball and he has friends and you can do classes with all of them.

And I said, oh, what a great idea. Let's go. I'm in, I mean, right. Always come from an entrepreneurial family, my grandparents, my grandfathers, they started businesses. So in my mind, I was going to be starting something. And thankfully the world, the world for me just came together. Everything came together. My friend bringing that up to me, having two young daughters.

And having an entrepreneurial mindset. Which I've been building up all for a lot of years. I've been reading a lot of books over the years, starting when I was 18.

Right. You are a basketball coach. How did you settle into that as a way to get. Young children and families that sense of community and learning these transferable skills through play.

In fact, I had a vision that it's kind of funny. I had a vision that at some point I was going to be doing something with young kids. It was when I woke up one morning and I was thinking to myself, wait a second. I can see myself. Working with young kids, because I already work with kids who play basketball and they're older.

So they're seven years old to a 17 years old. Then all of a sudden it changed. It was like two 30 in the morning. And I decided to work with young kids toddlers because I had toddlers. And I just felt like there was so much to show them the kids in the playground. They can. Plan a swing. They could jump on the monkey bars, but they could learn a sport.

Right. But that was the aha moment. And I had an Amazon moment of, Hey, I'm going to order everything at two 30 in the morning. I ordered everything. It was like, all right, I'm doing okay. And it was such a joy. It's a joy to know that I was going to be doing what I loved and giving back to these kids and giving to parents because a lot of parents were in need because they didn't know much about sports and they felt insecure about teaching their kids.

They're two year olds or three-year-olds basketball,

possibly the wrong way.

Dads. You talk about an insecurity. There it is for dads. Hey, I'm a man. I'm the man of the household, but I can't teach my child a sport. It was beautiful when they would come up to me. Um, and they would say to me, you know, I don't really I'd be in the park. I don't really know how to teach my kids a lot of basketball.

I, so can you help my child?

Were you at the time, just more informally hanging out at your neighborhood playground with your toddler or with your friends is deaf use who are older, or you were just inviting children to come and play

What's the advance child tax credit?

Danielle An — Tue, 13 Jul 2021 06:00:00 -0500

In this episode of early care for every kid, we discuss:

(01:30) what is the expanded/advance child tax credit
(02:40) how to claim the child tax credit (even if non-filer)
(03:01) how much will your family receive when
(04:18) who is eligible to receive the child tax credit
(05:06) how to claim the child tax credit (even if $0 income)
(07:00) when and how much
(07:42) why you might want to unenroll from the monthly payments
(08:43) immediate benefits of the child tax credits for businesses and families
(10:34) to be sure, naysayers may say...
(11:34) what I say
(13:14) benefits vs costs of the child tax credit
(15:00) how to make this a permanent fixture
(15:42) how to be a good neighbor

Mentioned in this episode:

Advance Child Tax Credit Payments in 2021 (Manage Payments | Non-Filers | Check Eligibility) https://www.irs.gov/credits-deductions/advance-child-tax-credit-payments-in-2021
American Rescue Plan https://www.whitehouse.gov/american-rescue-plan/
Research from the Center on Budget and Policy Priorities https://www.cbpp.org/research/federal-tax/house-covid-relief-bill-includes-critical-expansions-of-child-tax-credit-and

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AI-generated transcript below. Please excuse any typos or errors.

Danielle An

(00:00)

If you're a parent like me, you may have received an actual hard copy letter in the mail recently about the Advanced Child Tax Credit payments that will begin this week. I can't believe I'm saying this, but I'm excited to talk about updates from the IRS. The Advanced Child Tax credit and the payment schedule, what it is, who's eligible, and how much you can expect to receive.

It's all coming up in this episode of early care for every kid.

This is early care for every kid, a podcast for people who want to make learning, living, and loving more harmonious for everyone. I'm your host, Danielle An. Each week, I interview fellow parents, educators, advocates, and community leaders who care for and work with young children and families. I share their experiences, insights, and specific, actionable tips on how you could help make the world work better for everyone. Welcome to our conversation.

(01:30)

Beginning this week, the IRS will start making Advanced Child Tax Credit payments to eligible households in monthly payments. I'll go over what the advanced child tax credit is, who is eligible to receive this payment, what you have to do to claim this, when and how you can expect to receive how much, and finally, some thoughts on this.

(02:40)

1. First, what is the advanced child tax credit? Generally a child tax credit is a credit allowed for a percentage of work-related expenses to care for dependents a taxpayer would incur to work or to look for work, like childcare costs, before or after school care costs.

Typically tax credit is available only when you file your taxes. But this year 2021, the IRS is making early monthly payments, hence the name advance child tax credit, starting this Thursday, July 15th. Under President Joe Biden's American Rescue Plan signed into law in March of this year, 2021, a big change or expansion is that even non taxpayers, any parents with dependents, including people who have not filed taxes can get the payment.

One caveat for non tax filers, though, if you haven't filed taxes this year, or in recent years, for whatever reason, to be paid the child tax credit, you'd have to go to the IRS portal to submit basic info. Like your full name, current address, date of birth, social security number for you, your spouse, your dependents, bank account info, et cetera.

I'm including the link in the show notes.

(03:01)

Now, how much is this payment for your family?

Parents with an income of less than $150,000, if you're married and filing jointly, will get a max of $300 for each kid under the age of 6 and $250 for each kid ages 6 to 17 in monthly advanced payments.

If you have dependents aged 5 years old or younger, including newborns, payment amount will be up to $300 a month for each kid. That translates to $3,600 total per kid.

If you have dependents aged 6 through 17 years old, payment amount will be up to $250 per month per kid, or $3,000 total.

For example, if you have two kids in that age range from six to 17 years old, it would be up to $500 a month, starting this July through the end of the year.

The other half of the money will be part of your tax refund in 2022 when you file your 2021 taxes next year.

Families with higher incomes or with older dependents will get smaller payments.

(04:18)

2. So who is eligible to receive the advanced child tax credit?

The short answer is if you filed your 2020 taxes with the IRS , you don't have to take any additional action to receive the advanced child tax credit. Half of the total amount will be deposited into your bank account by direct deposit every month from July through December, over a six months.

The other half of the total amount will be paid when you file your 2021 taxes next year.

If you have not, or were not required to file taxes this year, or in recent years, you can still start accessing this money.

You just need to go to the child tax credit update portal on the IRS website and submit some info. I want to say this again.

(05:06)

Even if you typically don't file taxes, even if you had $0 in earned income, you can receive advanced child tax credit payments if eligible.

So again, who is eligible? In general, qualified children must live with the taxpayer or the tax filer in the United States for more than half the year.

I'm going to read this part directly from the IRS site, most recently updated June 14th, 2021:

You qualify for advanced child tax credit payments. If you have a qualifying child. Also you or your spouse, if married, filing a joint return, must have your main home in one of the 50 States or the District of Columbia for more than half the year. Your main home can be any location where you regularly live.

Your main home may be your house, apartment, mobile, home shelter, temporary lodging, or other location, and doesn't need to be the same physical location throughout the taxable year. You don't need a permanent address to get these payments. If you are temporarily away from your main home because of illness, education, business, vacation, or military service, you are generally treated as living in your main home.

So if you've lived in the United States for more than half of the year for 2021, and you have a qualifying child that is your dependent under the age of 18, then I believe you are eligible. Even if you have zero earned income.

But you must submit your information on the IRS sites portal. And the link will be in the show notes.

(07:00)

3. So. When and how you can expect to receive how much?

If your family is expecting to receive $3,000 total, six monthly payments of half of that amount, so 1500, would be made between July 15, this Thursday, through December 2021 over six months. Then when you file your taxes next year in 2022, your family would receive the other half, or 1500, as the seventh payment.

This monthly payment is intended to help immediately for dealing with monthly bills or expenses.

(07:42)

If you'd rather receive a lump sum next year when you file taxes in 2022, families have the option to unenroll or opt out anytime this year from the monthly payment of the child tax credit.

Now, why would anyone want to unenroll from this monthly payment, besides maybe just wanting a lump sum payment?

I'm not a tax expert, but if you anticipate any changes in your household's financial circumstances this year? Like moving up an income bracket or your dependents age out of an age bracket, say from five years old to six years old or 17 to 18, or if there's a change in custody. In these cases, you may want to unenroll from the monthly payment to a lump sum next year, but you should look into the IRS portal to get more specific answers. Again, I'm not an expert. I'm just sharing my research.

(08:43)

4. Some thoughts

So why am I excited about this? All this could be a lifeline for families and for businesses who could really use increased spending. We are seeing signs of our economy bouncing back. With summer camps and schools mandated to open back up in the fall.

But so many parents, especially women, left the labor force and have yet to rejoin the workforce due to lack of reliable childcare options during and after COVID. And according to the latest US Census Survey in May, a third of all adults with children are struggling to pay their usual expenses like food, rent, healthcare, and transportation.

One in eight adults living with children report their household doesn't have enough food to eat. One in five renters living with children reported they're not caught up on rent. Black and brown families and women, women of color are disproportionately feeling the strain of the pandemic. And research shows that financial hardship has long-term consequences for the healthy development of children.

We can get into this more in a separate episode, but research also shows that putting money directly into families is the most impactful way of reducing child poverty. Often families will struggle to make ends meet and have to take on expensive debt with high interest. A monthly allowance boosts a family's income and helps pay for the cost of diapers, food, formula, healthcare, childcare, clothing, and housing, according to their shifting needs.

(10:34)

Now a taxpayer without any dependents may feel like this kind of child tax credit, especially an expanded one, is unfair since public funds are going towards a specific population: families with dependents. I get how it may seem like it's unfair to direct public funds to address a need that's unique to one population like families with children.

Great for people who make under $150,000 with multiple children. But not so great for those without dependents or for those who earn well beyond the $150,000 threshold who don't need this kind of tax credit.

If we chose to have children, shouldn't we figure out any work-related expenses, including childcare costs, how to house clothe and feed our own kids?

(11:34)

But I want to respond to that line of argument or questioning, not with some moral argument like it's good to help others in need, but with an observation.

Even if we're not avid library users or public park users or subway or bus or train users or a commuter that needs to cross the Brooklyn Bridge daily. Having these public services or infrastructure in place helps our communities learn, grow, and connect more efficiently and effectively.

We can't always pinpoint what exactly contributed to new research or development or inventions or collaborations that advance our quality of life collectively. But without having basic needs met, like getting from one place to another or not being hungry or cold or safe, individuals can't thrive and communities can thrive.

It's only when we elevate the quality of life for everyone, at least to a basic livable, dignified level that we can all flourish and live creatively, or even just function?

Besides how do you not care about others at all? I just don't know. Even if their needs have nothing to do with my quality of life.

(13:14)

In any case, the benefits of the tax credit are supposed to far outweigh the costs.

Since child poverty costs the US between $800 billion to 1.1 trillion annually.

But thanks to the expanded child tax credit, about 4.1 million more children under 18 will be lifted out of poverty according to research.

(15:00)

5. What to do

Currently the child tax credit expansions apply for this year only. According to the American Family's Plan, President Biden would like to extend this into 2025. And there is a movement in Congress to make this tax break permanent, to help families among Democrats.

But it would help more families and children if it eliminated the requirement for a social security number. Because many who might actually really need this kind of child tax credit may not apply due to the families immigration status. Or for people without stable housing or a bank account.

But it would help more families and children who might need it the most if it eliminated or tweaked the requirements for a social security number, a home address, or a bank account. Many who might actually really need this kind of child tax credit may not apply out of fear for the families or relatives immigration status or due to housing insecurity or lack of access to a bank account.

In any case as expected, this movement is meeting resistance from Republicans who argue that this kind of child tax allowance encourages reliance on welfare and anti work attitude.

I think it's quite obvious that this is a helpful tax credit that will immediately give a big boost to our economy and families with children . And one that has merit to be made permanent. It will need some tweaks, a lot of support, activation and noise from constituents to the representatives to make it a meaningful fixture against resistance.

To sum this episode up. If you've filed taxes already, you don't need to take any action to receive the advanced child tax credit. If you haven't filed anything, you're still eligible if you live in the US for more than half of 2021, and have a child who will be under the age of 18, by the end of 2021.

Check out the IRS portal, linked in the show notes to check your eligibility for the payments, submit your info or opt out of receiving monthly payments. And instead to receive a lump sum next year, when you file taxes.

(15:42)

Finally, if there's anyone in your community who may not be aware of the expanded eligibility, especially those who may not have filed taxes in the past, who may not be familiar with filing taxes or the interface, this could be helpful information to share. If you're listening to this podcast and know someone who might need help submitting their information on the IRS portal to be able to receive payments, please let's be a good neighbor.

Thanks for joining me Danielle An for this episode of early care for every kid. I hope this clarified some questions you may have had, but didn't have time to look into. You can find the resources mentioned at early care for every kid.org/five. And connect with me on Instagram at early care for every kid.

If you haven't already, go ahead and hit the follow button wherever you're listening to subscribe to the podcast. Till next time, take care.

Getting curious | Angelina Torres, advocate for kids w/ special needs (Part 2)

Danielle An — Wed, 07 Jul 2021 04:00:00 -0500

>> Trigger Warning: Mention of childhood abuse in this episode

Angie is a mom, an early childhood educator, and an advocate for children with special needs.

In Part 2 of my conversation with Angelina Torres, we discuss:

● (02:05) services available to serve special needs (IFSP IEP, etc.)

● (05:08) how schools and teachers could better support all families and children

● (06:20) equity vs. equality

● (14:40) speaking up + listening on behalf of children’s needs

● (18:00) some signs of possible abuse of neglect in young children

● (20:00) collaborating and connecting w/ Angie.

Mentioned in this episode:

● Angie Torres https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100008365907919&sk=about

● MOMally Astoria facebook group facebook.com/groups/MOMallyAstoria/about

● Getting special services

○ IFSP Individualized Family Service Plan https://www.understood.org/articles/en/ifsp-what-it-is-and-how-it-works

○ IEP https://www.pacer.org/parent/php/PHP-c59.pdf

● If you suspect possible child abuse or neglect https://www.parent.com/blogs/conversations/steps-to-take-now-if-you-suspect-child-abuse

Join the conversation:

follow earlycareforeverykid.org
connect instagram.com/earlycareforeverykid

Speaking up for all children | Angelina Torres, advocate for kids w/ special needs (Part 1)

Danielle An — Wed, 30 Jun 2021 02:30:00 -0500

>> Trigger Warning: Mention of childhood abuse in this episode

In Part 1 of my conversation with Angelina Torres, we discuss:

(02:27) Angie's early entry into early childhood care
(05:46) why focus on the earliest years?
(08:35) the basic essential needs for infants (what are they and why do they matter?)
(14:35) reshuffling of childcare arrangements while studying, working, running a business as a mom to 3
(21:21) really going for what lights you up
(23:03) the need for a support system for all kids, even outside the family unit
(26:13) being a good parent

Angie is a mom, an early childhood educator, and an advocate for children with special needs.

Mentioned in this episode:

MOMally Astoria facebook.com/groups/MOMallyAstoria/about
Why Early Childhood https://www.startearly.org/why-early-childhood/

Join the conversation:

follow earlycareforeverykid.org
connect instagram.com/earlycareforeverykid

Elevating diverse voices for equity | Tricia Shimamura, NYC Council Candidate

Danielle An — Tue, 22 Jun 2021 09:00:00 -0500

New York City Council candidate Tricia Shimamura joins me to discuss:

(04:00) what it means to run as a historically underrepresented voice and intersectional perspective in NYC today
(04:37) how diversity and accessibility (or the lack thereof) translates to community priorities, budget, and equity (quality of life for businesses and families)
(8:06) how to begin participating in community activism and leadership
(11:50) universal childcare
(24:25) building coalitions to tackle maternal mortality and childcare crises
(29:50) qualities that make women natural leaders
(33:03) cultivating future civic leaders through She Will Rise
(40:50) saying yes to running for office

and more.

Tricia is a mom, social worker, community activist, and proud Japanese Puerto Rican woman running to serve District 5 of the NYC Council.

Mentioned in this episode:

Tricia Shimamura triciaforny.nyc
New York City Council council.nyc.gov
What Does the NYC Council Do? youtube.com/watch?v=5Kn5YLSjenY
She Will Rise shewillrise.nyc
“Rumors of Our Progress Have Been Greatly Exaggerated: Why Women’s Lives Aren’t Getting Any Easier - And How We Can Make Real Progress For Ourselves and Our Daughters” by Congresswoman Carolyn B. Maloney penguinrandomhouse.com/books/593742

NY Primary Election is 6/22/2021!

Go vote! voting.nyc

Join the conversation:

connect earlycareforeverykid.org
instagram instagram.com/earlycareforeverykid

Why care about early childhood care? | Danielle An (Intro)

Danielle An — Tue, 22 Jun 2021 04:00:00 -0500

How would it feel to live in a culture that honored our individuality? What would it take to create a world where everyone felt absolutely free to pursue their aspirations?

In this very first episode, I am excited to share

(00:40) a bit of background on your host, Danielle An
(11:05) what early care has anything to do with living wonderful lives (a quick story)
(08:10) what to expect in future episodes (inspiration, resources, and community!)
(18:05) how you can join the conversation

Join the conversation:

follow earlycareforeverykid.org
connect instagram.com/earlycareforeverykid

Introducing early care for every kid

Danielle An — Wed, 10 Feb 2021 10:00:00 -0500

What would it look like to live in a culture that honored individuality and harnessed the power of self worth? How do we make learning, living, and loving more harmonious not only for the children of today and tomorrow, but also the inner child we each already have within us?

Danielle An tries to answer these questions through the lens of a mother trying to raise feminist sons. You can look forward to interviews with fellow parents, educators, entrepreneurs, activists, and thought leaders doing big and small things in the early childhood space to bring us closer to that kind of world.

We share intimate stories that may make you laugh out loud, or cry, to help you feel less alone or blindsided by the early childhood years. We share insights on what families and young children need to thrive.

The mission? To move hearts and minds into taking action to make early care a birthright for every kid.

Join the conversation:

Subscribe earlycareforeverykid.org

Connect instagram.com/earlycareforeverykid