Kirsten Johnson Podcast

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Ep 150 The #1 Way Angry AA's Come For You

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 06:00:00 -0700

You’re Angry. You’re Resentful. You’re a Dry Drunk. You’ll Be Drunk in Five Years.

Have you ever heard things like this? 👀

Today’s episode dives into the #1 way AA defenders come for you (and why it’s actually a logical fallacy).

This one’s a total game-changer in our Critical Thinking Series, because once you see this pattern — you can’t unsee it. We’re breaking down how ad hominem (Latin for “to the person”) and appeal to authority show up in arguments, manipulation, and cult-like thinking — not just in AA, but everywhere.

00:00 Way Angry AA's Come For You Intro

01:28 Ad Hominem

04:35 Appeal to Authority

07:24 Staying Safe From Manipulation

14:18 Dry Drunk Mythology

18:06 Ad Hominem Deeper Dive

Whether you’re deprogramming from a high-control group, rethinking recovery, or just learning to trust your own brain again — this one’s for you.

Tara's Stanton Peel interview

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👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 149 I'm sorry (my amends)

Tue, 04 Nov 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Today’s episode is called “I’m Sorry (My Amends)” — but this isn’t the kind of amends you think. 🕊️

I just got off our Deprogram Zoom Call inside the free Deprogram Lounge, and someone said something that hit me hard:

“I don’t agree with everything you say.” And honestly… that’s exactly what I hope for.

This episode is about learning to think for ourselves again — after indoctrination, after dogma, after groupthink. It’s about realizing that disagreement isn’t danger. It’s freedom. 💥

In this episode:

Why I want you to disagree with me
How critical thinking cracked my AA brainwashing
What “recovering from recovery” really means
Why blind faith feels like safety — but isn’t
How we find truth together through dialogue

🌀 Deprogram AA Course

📚 Deprogram Book List

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👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 148 Vibing LIVE with Burn The Stigma

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 07:30:00 -0700

You're invited to our first ever LIVE stream episode featuring Tara Grace from Burn The Stigma and Kirsten (me, Sobriety Bestie) discussing all the addiction and recovery things.

We went live on Sunday November 2nd and are thinking about making this an ongoing thing (let me know what you think!).

Burn The Stigma channel:‪@Burnthestigma420‬

🪩 Get free tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 147 Escaping from Alcoholics Anonymous 👻🎃🕸️🕷️💀

Fri, 31 Oct 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Escaping AA: Halloween Special with Carrie (AA Escapee 👻)

Your best thinking got you here — now let’s get you free.

In this Halloween jam, Carrie and I riff the AA clichés we lived, how we actually left, and what life’s like now without the daily-reprieve hamster wheel.

Critical thinking, self-trust, nervous system regulation, and writing a new story — no chips required.

Carrie's Substack

Timestamps:

0:00 Escaping from AA Intro

0:19 What It Was Like (in AA)

08:36 What happened (to leave AA)

10:59 No Daily Reprieve Needed

15:36 Escaping AA

18:49 What It's Like Now

28:33 Reinventing + Reconstructing After AA

31:34 AA Escapee Awakening

34:34 Normalizing Leaving Recovery

🪩 Get free tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 146 The AA Big Book's Most Harmful Line

Tue, 28 Oct 2025 06:00:00 -0700

There are many harmful aspects of Alcoholics Anonymous, but today we’re diving into what I believe is the most damaging paragraph in the Big Book of AA — and how it quietly stripped away my self-trust, autonomy, and personal power.

If you’ve ever wondered why you still doubt yourself, feel “selfish” for wanting things, or have trouble trusting your own instincts after AA — this episode is for you.

In this podcast, I break down how this one paragraph shaped my thinking for years and how I’ve been rewiring my brain since leaving AA.

Timestamps:

00:00 Intro Harmful Line in AA Big Book

02:42 Most Harmful Big Book Paragraph

03:55 Why It's Harmful

07:15 How The Harmful Brainwashing Happened

🌀 Deprogram AA Course

📚 Deprogram Book List

🪩 Get free tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 145 Five Ways AA Fools Smart People

Sun, 26 Oct 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Ever wonder how smart, self-aware people can get trapped in systems like AA for years, decades or life? 🤔

In this episode, we break down the decision traps that keep us stuck — and how to reclaim your mind, freedom, and critical thinking power.

If you’ve ever felt fooled, shamed, or confused after leaving a high-control group or belief system, this one’s for you.

Timestamps:

00:00 AA Fools Smart People Intro

01:38 1 - Loss Aversion

05:20 2 - Sunk Cost Fallacy

08:56 3 - Framing Effect

11:04 4 - Mental Accounting

13:29 5 - Overconfidence or Intuition Bias

16:17 Growing in Wisdom

19:11 Cautious With Ideologies

Biology of Desire book review video

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👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 144 Ideological Possession: Big Freedom Unlock

Thu, 23 Oct 2025 06:00:00 -0700

There’s a term that unlocked massive freedom for me when I left Alcoholics Anonymous: Ideological Possession.

In this episode, I share how I first heard the concept from Jordan Peterson, how it helped me see AA for what it truly is — a belief system, not a path to truth — and how understanding it completely changed the way I see the world.

If you’ve ever felt possessed by an ideology — whether it’s AA, religion, politics, or something else — this one’s for you.

We’ll talk about:

00:00 Ideological Possession Intro

04:15 “You don’t have ideas, ideas have you”

06:02 Understanding Ideological Possession Unlocked Freedom

07:56 True Believers vs. Periphery Cult Members

10:17 Why I no longer try to convert anyone

Jordan Peterson video

🪩 Get free tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 143 Why Addiction Is Not A Disease — Biology of Desire Book Review

Tue, 21 Oct 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Is addiction a disease, a choice — or something in between? 🤔

In this episode, I dive into The Biology of Desire: Why Addiction Is Not a Disease by Mark Lewis, PhD — the book we just finished in our Deprogram Book Club inside the free Deprogram Lounge community. 💬📚

Mark Lewis argues that addiction isn’t a disease or a moral failing — it’s a deeply learned habit rooted in neuroplasticity and desire.

In this video, I share my biggest takeaways from the book, how my view of addiction has evolved since leaving AA, and why I now see addiction as a habit of thought, feeling, and behavior — one that can be unlearned.

We’ll explore:

Why the “disease model” doesn’t hold up to science
How neuroplasticity explains both addiction and recovery
What studies like Rat Park + Vietnam veterans reveal about environment
Why “recovery” is really just the beginning of something new
How AA pathologizes normal emotions and replaces self-trust with dogma

Timestamps:

00:54 Core Framework

01:31 Addiction as a Habit

06:03 We Over Pathologize People

07:51 Evidence Against The Disease Model

09:40 Habit Loops

12:23 Our Brains Recover On Their Own

5 Ways to Stop Second Guessing Yourself After Leaving AA

🪩 Get free tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 142 Seven Ways AA Hijacked Your Brain

Sun, 19 Oct 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Leaving AA isn’t just about walking away from meetings — it’s about rewiring your brain.

In this episode of The Sobriety Bestie Podcast, I share 7 ways Alcoholics Anonymous can hijack your thinking (often subtly, then aggressively)… and how to get your critical thinking and self-trust back.

I spent 10 years in AA and left in 2020. What I’ve discovered since will blow your mind. This video is part of our Critical Thinking Series — because freedom starts with changing our minds.

Timestamps:

00:00 Intro – AA Brainwashing Intro

01:13 1 – Authority Bias

04:10 2 – Groupthink

06:42 3 – Confirmation Bias

13:27 4 – Learned Helplessness

18:14 5 – Negativity Bias

23:47 6 – Anchoring Bias

28:03 7 – Illusory Truth Effect

Videos mentioned:

Deconstructing Sobriety Birthdays + AA Sober Time

Leaving AA Conversations (playlist)

🪩 Get free tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 141 Five Ways To Stop Second Guessing Yourself After Leaving AA

Sun, 12 Oct 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Have you ever caught yourself spinning on a decision — looping between “what if” and “maybe not”? You’re not alone.

In this episode, I’m sharing 5 powerful ways to stop second-guessing yourself, especially if you’re leaving AA, deconstructing 12-step ideology, or just learning to trust your own thinking again.

By the end of this video, you’ll understand:

Why second-guessing happens
How to spot cognitive dissonance in real time
A simple move to get unstuck fast

This is for anyone who’s been taught to doubt themselves — by society, religion, recovery programs, or high-control groups — and is now reclaiming their critical thinking, intuition, and freedom.

Timestamps:

00:00 Stop Second Guessing Yourself in Recovery intro

00:59 Why I Was Second Guessing Myself After Leaving AA

03:30 1 - Cognitive Dissonance

11:32 2 - Fear of Mistakes or Regrets

16:45 3- Conditioning and Authority

23:36 4 - Perfectionism and Control

29:08 5 - Threat Mode Biology

38:55 Recap 5 Ways to Stop Second Guessing Yourself

🪩 Get free tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 140 Six Months Speaking Out About AA Changed My Life

Mon, 06 Oct 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Six months ago I finally hit publish on my first video about leaving AA—and it changed everything.

What started as fear turned into freedom, growth, and a whole new life. In this episode I reflect on six months of dissenting out loud, what I’ve learned from deconstructing Alcoholics Anonymous, and why this work matters so much. From 123 videos to playlists on AA mind control, cult comparisons, grieving, and alternatives, we’ve built a massive resource for anyone ready to get AA out of their head (playlists linked below)

Playlists:

AA Mind Control

AA Is A Cult

AA Culty Comments

Leaving AA Conversations

Now, as I move from deconstruction into critical thinking and reconstruction, I’m inviting you to keep evolving with me. Team Freedom—let’s keep getting free together.

Quackaholics Anonymous YouTube Channel

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👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 139 Quackaholics Anonymous: AA Kept Him Relapsing, Leaving Set Him Free – Victor’s Story

Fri, 03 Oct 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Victor from Quackaholics Anonymous shares his powerful journey of breaking free from Alcoholics Anonymous and finding the power to quit drinking on his own.

In this candid conversation, Victor opens up about being branded a “chronic relapser” in AA, feeling isolated and hopeless, and how leaving the program set him free. From realizing AA was a scam, to rebuilding life on his own terms, to starting one of the first dissenting AA YouTube channels — this is his story of reclaiming self-esteem, critical thinking, and true sobriety.

Whether you loved AA, hated it, or are just questioning it, this interview shines light on what life after AA can look like.

Timestamps:

00:00 Intro Quackaholics Anonymous

03:48 Deprogramming Out Loud, Online

05:28 First Leaving Alcoholics Anonymous

10:24 Seeing Old Timers "True Colors"

13:58 DUI + Getting Back On Your Feet

16:57 Feeling Empty After Leaving AA

19:31 Deciding To Leave AA

24:35 Finding The Power To Stop Drinking Without AA

28:14 Realizing AA Is A Scam

35:17 Starting A Dissenting + Deprogramming AA YouTube Channel

47:33 The Mindset That Got Him Sober Without AA

54:20 Rebuilding Life After AA

1:03:13 Deconstructing AA Martyrdom + Self Sacrafice

1:11:58 Best Part About AA Dissenting

1:23:20 AA Disables Critical Thinking + Self Esteem

1:28:14 AA Friendships After Leaving AA?

1:34:00 Commenting With Trolls, Haters + AA Lovers

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 138 AA Invented This Term to Control You #CultyComments

Wed, 01 Oct 2025 06:00:00 -0700

In this episode of the Sobriety Bestie Podcast, I’m unpacking a culty comment that accuses my podcast of being “alcoholic thinking and behaving at its finest.”

🚫 Here’s the truth: there is no such thing as “alcoholic thinking” or “alcoholic behavior” outside of literally drinking alcohol.

These terms were invented and weaponized by AA to control the narrative, sell the disease model, and funnel people toward God as the supposed solution.

We’ll break down:

How Bill W. used Dr. Silkworth’s “fatal disease” pitch to sell God
Why terms like “alcoholic thinking” are propaganda, not science
How attacking the messenger distracts from the real issue: the harmful ideology
How critical thinking is a path to freedom

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 137 Deconstructing Sobriety Birthdays and AA Sober Time

Mon, 29 Sep 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Welcome to our sobriety birthday party podcast. Today September 29th I'm 16 years sober and Carrie (here's her Substack) turned 26 years sober on September 17th, the day we recorded this. You're in for a fun treat as we unpack all the sobriety birthday and sober time things.

In this candid convo, Carrie and I unpack the status game around sober time, the shame of “starting over,” why slips don’t erase growth, and what feels actually worth celebrating now.

If you’ve ever felt weird about chips, countdowns, or announcing your sobriety date, this one’s for you.

We explore:

What sobriety dates measure—and what they don’t
The difference between early-days momentum vs. long-term identity
How purity culture sneaks into recovery language
Alternative markers of progress (health, boundaries, critical thinking, purpose)
Harm-reduction openness and letting people choose what works for them

00:00 Intro deconstructing sobriety birthdays and AA sober time

1:04 Carrie's sobriety birthday feels

06:26 Rethinking slips, relapses and changing sobriety date

10:36 AA conference slipped alcohol

16:02 Rigidity around sobriety birthday announcements

21:39 What does a sobriety birthday actually measure?

23:04 Does drinking actually "erase" sobriety time?

31:04 Why anchor to an old bad habit?

36:59 Sobriety date becomes new birthday

40:18 Sobriety birthday parties

47:37 How long does it take to deprogram?

55:18 Sobriety time "status" game

57:27 Coerced into marketing AA via sobriety chips

1:07:52 What feels relevant to celebrate now?

1:17:22 Do sobriety birthdays matter?

1:24:20 Sober time hierarchy + countdowns

Carrie's Substack: https://carrieengland.substack.com/

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 136 AA Across The World Same Book, Same Control #CultyComments

Fri, 26 Sep 2025 06:00:00 -0700

In today’s Culty Comments episode of the Sobriety Bestie Podcast, we’re breaking down a classic AA defender argument: “You got sober in the wrong country — AA is different elsewhere.”

I’ve been to meetings across the U.S., Australia, Bali, India, Nepal, and Europe — and here’s the truth: no matter the culture, no matter the meeting format, it all comes back to the same book and the same controlling ideology.

👉 In this episode we’ll cover:

Attacking the messenger instead of the message
My firsthand experiences in Australia AA
How AA’s “Big Book” is inherently controlling
Why the 12 Steps are always the same path

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 135 How Charlie Sheen Got Sober (And His Thoughts on AA)

Wed, 24 Sep 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Charlie Sheen has been one of the most outspoken celebrities about his relationship with Alcoholics Anonymous and sobriety.

From his infamous “winning” era in 2011 to creating his own Sober Valley Lodge, to now approaching 8 years sober, Charlie has been refreshingly candid about what worked—and what didn’t—for him.

In this video, we react to Charlie Sheen’s recent appearance on the Joe Rogan podcast, dive into his brand-new book The Book of Sheen (2025), and unpack his raw thoughts on AA, interventions, sponsorship, and making the decision to quit drinking on his own terms.

2011 Charlie Sheen Interview

Joe Rogan Podcast with Charlie Sheen

The Book of Sheen

Timestamps:

00:00 How Charlie Sheen Got Sober Intro

01:37 Charlie Sheen on Joe Rogan Podcast

05:26 Charlie Sheen's Intervention

07:33 How Charlie Sheen Got Sober (this time)

14:32 Making A Decision + Sticking To It

18:21 Charlie Sheen On AA's Indoctrination Process

24:51 Charlie Sheen Got Sober On His Own

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 134 Alan Carr's Quit Drinking Without Willpower — Book Review

Mon, 22 Sep 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Alan Carr flips the script on alcohol. Instead of using willpower to fight cravings, he shows how to remove the desire to drink altogether. 🎉

In this episode, I review Allen Carr’s Easy Way to Quit Drinking Without Willpower and share how the method connected with my own journey—both quitting cigarettes and alcohol.

Whether you’re looking for an AA alternative, rethinking your relationship with alcohol, or just curious about habit change, this perspective shift might blow your mind.

Get the book here.

Timestamps:

00:00 Allen Carr's Easy Way to Quit Drinking Intro

02:35 How I Quit Smoking Cigarettes

09:07 All Brains Can Become Addicted

10:46 Brainwashed Quitting is Hard

13:46 Brainwashed into Drinking Trap

15:45 Little Monster (Withdrawal) + Big Monster (Desire to Drink)

21:08 New Attitude on Sobriety

23:07 Addictive Personality Mythology

27:01 Alcohol Does Not Cause Pleasure

29:56 Don't Drink Poison Ever

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 133 Deprogramming AA From the Inside — Bobby C.’s Story

Fri, 19 Sep 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Bobby C from Anonymous Addiction Podcast spent 35 years inside Alcoholics Anonymous — but he was never fully at peace with the ideology. Trapped by cognitive dissonance, he questioned the slogans, the control structures, and the religious roots even while he kept showing up.

In this conversation, Bobby shares how he saw “cults within the cult,” why the chips and steps never sat right, and how he finally shifted into true freedom outside the 12-step frame.

Bobby C's YouTube

Bobby C's Facebook Group

Bobby C's TikTok

Timestamps:

00:00 — Intro Bobby C Deprogramming While In AA

02:05 — Joining AA + First Sponsor

08:29 — In Alcoholics Anonymous 35 Years

10:08 — Control structure: Steps, Traditions, Concepts, Trustees

14:36 — Roots in religion: Oxford Group, Sister Ignatia, priests

18:14 — Labels, DSM skepticism, and “dis-ease”

23:14 — Culture & media: why AA dominates screen time

39:30 — Paradigm shift away from 12-step + leaving timeline

50:45 — Becoming a SMART Recovery facilitator

56:05 — Boundaries, in-person community, and the “becoming” lens

1:11:10 — How Bobby C and Sobriety Bestie "met"

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 132 AA Doublespeak: Your Best Thinking Got Your Here

Wed, 17 Sep 2025 06:00:00 -0700

AA loves to say “Your best thinking got you here.”

But when I arrived at AA, I was in survival mode with my worst thinking—traumatized, anxious, medicated, and terrified. To call that my “best” is pure doublespeak.

In this episode, I break down why this phrase is manipulative, how it positions members to distrust their own thoughts, and how Bill Wilson’s best thinking (propaganda, PR, Oxford Group ideology) is what actually got me to AA.

We’ll unpack:

Why “best thinking” is not survival mode.
How AA reframes your worst mental state as your “best” to enforce obedience.
The propaganda that made AA seem like the only path.
What “best thinking” actually means (from a neuroscience perspective).
Why leaving AA required my true best thinking.

Timestamps:

00:00 Your Best Thinking Got You Here Intro

01:48 My Worst Thinking Got Me To AA

06:49 Survival Thinking vs Best Thinking

09:42 Bill Wilson’s Best Thinking + AA Propaganda

13:12 What My Best Thinking Looks Like

15:02 Invitation to the Deprogram Lounge

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 131 When Strangers Try to Convince You You’re Powerless #CultyComments

Mon, 15 Sep 2025 06:00:00 -0700

A random AA stranger tried to convince me that I’m powerless—that I can’t even know if I’ll drink tomorrow.

He compared my choices to predicting the lottery. 🤦‍♀️

This episode breaks down the logical fallacies and culty ideology behind the powerless narrative AA keeps pushing. Of course I have no clue what YOU should or will do. But I do know I'm not drinking tomorrow.

We’re powerful. We can change habits, rewire our brains, and decide our own future.

Anyone trying to convince you otherwise? 🚩 That’s control, not truth.

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 130 The Doctor's Opinion That Trapped Millions for Life – Big Book Deconstruction #2

Fri, 12 Sep 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Welcome back to our Big Book Deconstruction series. In this episode, Kirsten and Carrie (Carrie’s Substack here) unpack The Doctor’s Opinion — the chapter that AA uses as its "medical" foundation.

We explore how Dr. Silkworth’s unproven ideas about a “fatal progressive disease” became the sales pitch that trapped millions into a lifetime of dependence.

🕒 Timestamps

00:00 – Deconstructing The Doctor's Opinion Intro

01:23 – Dr. Silkworth Traps + Converts Us

04:08 – Lies AA Coerced Us Into Believing

08:25 – Bill + Dr. Silkworth Fall Off The Pedestal

15:56 – We Need A New "Marty Mann"

22:44 – Predators in Alcoholics Anonymous

29:34 – AA Opinions Are Not Facts

34:29 – Deconstructing The Doctor's Opinion

40:17 – Bill Becoming A Millionaire

47:31 – Deconstructing Dr. Silkworth's Letter

57:15 – Body + Mind "Abnormal" Mythology

01:08:23 – The "Allergy" Manipulation

01:13:31 – Toxicity + Learned Helplessness in AA

01:19:39 – Bill's Best Thinking Got Us To AA

01:29:22 – Breaking AA's Global Indoctrination

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 129 Common Abuse And Mistreatment in AA

Wed, 10 Sep 2025 06:00:00 -0700

In this episode of the Sobriety Bestie Podcast, we’re breaking down the most common forms of abuse and mistreatment in Alcoholics Anonymous—from being told you have a “progressive, fatal disease,” to being convinced you’re powerless, to the gaslighting baked into terms like “dry drunk” or “denial.”

These points come from Rational Recovery by Jack Trimpey, written 30 years ago but still just as relevant today. We’ll unpack the first 10 examples from the book and talk about how AA’s harmful messaging keeps people stuck in fear, shame, and learned helplessness.

This conversation is about more than deconstructing AA—it’s about critical thinking, self-trust, and freedom.

Rational Recovery book: https://amzn.to/47AyGlh

Timestamps:

00:00 Intro Common Abuse in AA

02:22 1 — "Fatal progressive disease"

04:41 2 — "Can't abstain on your own"

05:21 3 — "AA is the only way"

06:31 4 — "AA is not religious"

07:22 5 — "Must surrender to AA ideology"

08:58 6 — "You'll relapse without AA"

09:18 7 — "Dry drunk"

11:34 8 — "Alcoholism symptoms"

12:30 9 — "Leaving AA means you'll relapse"

14:25 — 10 "Doubting AA means is a symptom"

16:12 We save ourselves

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 128 Guilt, Doublespeak + Denial in AA Recruitment #CultyComments

Mon, 08 Sep 2025 06:00:00 -0700

In this #CultyComments episode, we’re breaking down two of AA’s most common contradictions:

👉 “AA has no leaders.” Really? Sponsors, old-timers, secretaries, and even professional recruiters all lead — they just hide it behind the doublespeak of “trusted servants.”

👉 “You can leave anytime.” On the surface, yes. But the ideology repeats that leaving = relapse, jails, institutions, or death. That’s phobia indoctrination, and it keeps people trapped even when they want out.

This isn’t about shaming one person. It’s about exposing how AA’s own language and thought reform tactics convince members they’re free, while quietly controlling their choices.

✨ In this video, I unpack:

The doublespeak of “trusted servants”
Why AA says you can leave while planting fear of leaving
How recruitment gets disguised as “suggestion” or care
What cult recovery teaches us about breaking free

Any group that tells you you’ll die if you leave? 🚩 Run for the hills.

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 127 She Decided to Drink Again After 13 Years in AA — Emma’s Story (Group Thinking Podcast)

Fri, 05 Sep 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Emma from Group Thinking Podcast left AA after nearly 13 years—and chose moderation. In this candid conversation, we unpack what made her walk away, how she rebuilt community, why “your disease is getting worse even when you’re sober” never sat right, and what deprogramming looks like in real life.

We get into AA culture, Finland AA vs. international AA, sponsorship red flags, nervous system regulation, trying alcohol again (including first-week hangovers and fear), and the power of speaking out.

Emma also shares how launching a deconstructing AA podcast became both purpose and therapy—and why multiple recovery paths (not one ideology) should be the norm. ⛪📘🧠

Emma's Group Thinking Podcast

Timestamps:

00:00 Emma from Group Thinking Podcast intro

01:00 Leaving AA After 13 Years

07:54 ACA, 12 Step Pathologizing Culture

10:38 Starting A Deprogramming Podcast

13:20 Nervous System Regulation After AA

15:30 Deciding To Drink Alcohol Again

18:00 Podcasting To Help Deprogramming Journey

22:10 Coming Out Online About Leaving AA

23:54 Drinking in Front of AA Family Member

27:19 Feeling Confident Drinking

31:05 Steps to Leaving AA

37:00 Finland AA Vs. International AA

39:22 Emma's Message

43:23 Rebuilding Life After AA

50:37 Advice to Former Self

54:20 Most Harmful Part of AA

1:00:09 Best Part of Leaving AA

1:04:07 Tried to Make AA Safer

1:09:35 Feedback From Podcast Listeners

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 126 Hidden Danger in AA Meetings

Wed, 03 Sep 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Any group that tells you you’ll die if you leave? 🚩 Run for the hills.

In this episode of the Sobriety Bestie Podcast, I dive into the hidden danger in AA meetings — not just shady individuals or mini–cult leaders, but the ideology itself.

📖 Inspired by Rational Recovery: The New Cure for Substance Addiction by Jack Trimpey, we’ll unpack his concept of Recovery Group Disorder (RGD) — the compulsive dependency on recovery meetings that looks and feels a lot like addiction itself.

Rational Recovery book: https://amzn.to/47AyGlh

Timestamps:

00:00 Intro — hidden dangers in AA

01:14 What is “Recovery Group Disorder”?

03:06 Are recovery meetings required?

05:55 Expanded definition of RGD

08:08 Problems AA creates in identity + thinking

10:40 How AA builds dependency

14:28 Moving on with life

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 125 Rational Recovery Book — Escape the Recovery Trap

Mon, 01 Sep 2025 06:00:00 -0700

You are powerful. You can decide your future. You don’t need AA, sponsors, or church basements to stay sober.

In this episode of the Sobriety Bestie Podcast, I dive into Rational Recovery: The New Cure for Substance Addiction by Jack Trimpey — the revolutionary AA alternative that says: once you decide, that’s it. No “recovery process,” no lifelong meetings.

We’ll explore:

Why Rational Recovery rejects the disease model
The Addictive Voice Recognition Technique (AVRT) & “The Beast”
The power of making a Big Plan
How Rational Recovery success rates compare to AA
Why recovery groups can actually keep you stuck

I wish I had found this book when I got sober in 2009. It’s bold, liberating, and a must-read if you’re deprogramming from AA or exploring real freedom.

You can check out the Rational Recovery book here.

Timestamps

00:00 Rational Recovery intro

03:16 Rational Recovery history

04:56 No recovery meetings required

07:05 Rational Recovery core philosophy

10:22 Recovery reality check

13:50 Addictive Voice Recognition Technique

15:43 Being "in two minds" about drinking

19:28 Deciding to not drink

23:13 Common myths Rational Recovery challenges

25:15 "Recovery Group Disorder"

26:34 Rational Recovery main takeaway

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 124 13th Step Filmmaker Exposes AA’s Darkest Secrets — Monica Richardson's Story

Fri, 29 Aug 2025 06:00:00 -0700

After 36 years in Alcoholics Anonymous, filmmaker Monica Richardson discovered the truth she never expected: AA has a dark side.

In this episode of the Sobriety Bestie Podcast, Monica shares her journey from devoted member to whistleblower, revealing:

How violent offenders and predators are court-ordered into meetings
The cover-ups and silence that keep people trapped
Why she decided to make her documentary, The 13th Step
How she finally broke free after 36 years

This is a powerful conversation about trust, recovery, and taking your power back.

Monica Richardson's links:

Watch The 13th Step Documentary

Monica's Deprogram FB Group

Monica's YouTube

Connect with Monica: makeAAsafer@gmail.com

Timestamp:

00:00 Monica's AA Escape Story

1:04 Criminals Court Ordered to AA

05:09 Monica's 13th Step Film

06:35 Cracks in the Brainwashing

13:00 Dark Side of LA and Hawaii AA

18:59 More Reasons to Leave AA

24:49 Making a Plan to Leave AA

39:13 Nurses, Doctors, Pilots Forced into AA

46:11 Anger and AA

47:50 Navigating Being 13th Stepped

54:57 A Wave of 12 Step Harm Awarness

1:04:45 Autism, Sexual Abuse + Gaslighting

1:09:16 Kicked out of Sober Living, Psychedelics + Healing

1:12:31 Monica's Deprogramming 12 Step Facebook Group

1:15:20 Advice to Someone Leaving AA

Additional Resources Monica Mentioned:

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 123 RFK Jr Is Brainwashed — And Recruiting Us

Wed, 27 Aug 2025 06:00:00 -0700

RFK Jr. just admitted it: AA is brainwashing — and he wanted it. 🤯

In this episode, we break down his April 2025 speech on the opioid crisis in Nashville and expose how deeply Alcoholics Anonymous ideology is woven into his words.

From “your disease is doing pushups” to magical thinking and lifelong indoctrination, this talk is packed with AA propaganda — and it’s being spread from the top of American health leadership.

This isn’t about RFK Jr. as a person — it’s about the dangerous ideology being promoted as fact. If you’ve ever questioned AA, felt trapped by its dogma, or wondered why so much of this sounds like cult language… this episode will be a game-changer.

You can watch the original video here.

Timestamps:

00:00 Intro RFK Jr Indoctrinating The World

01:50 "Disease" learned helplessness indoctrination

04:50 "It's irrelevant how I got it"

07:75 "My addiction is doing push ups"

10:04 12 step brainwashing + propaganda

17:00 12 step religious conversion

20:26 42 years of daily meetings

24:38 Jails, institutions, death + identity manipulation

36:07 What about church and state?

39:33 Misinformation about AA roots

51:24 Daily reprieve manipulation

54:57 Spiritual bypassing

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 122 Who AA Helps, Harms and Kills — Book Review

Mon, 25 Aug 2025 06:00:00 -0700

AA doesn’t just “help” people. It also harms — and in some cases, kills. This episode is a deep dive into AA: Who It Helps, Who It Harms, Who It Kills, and Why by Dr. Edward Wilson, PhD.

We’ll explore the central premise of the book: that AA is either irrelevant or actively harmful for most people who misuse alcohol. You’ll hear clips from the author himself, and then I unpack the book through the lens of my own experience after 10 years in AA and 5 years out.

We’ll look at why AA only works for a narrow group, how it harms “normals” who might have recovered naturally, and why it can be deadly for the bright, creative, independent thinkers who are forced to conform and cut off from self-trust.

For anyone deprogramming from the cult religion of Alcoholics Anonymous, or anyone seeking new ways to understand alcohol addiction, this book is a liberating resource.

Get the book here

Watch video from reaction here

Timestamps:

00:00 AA Helps, Harms, Kills intro

01:24 Author Dr. Edward Wilson reaction

05:10 Minnesota Model doesn't work?

07:26 Why people think AA works

10:28 Ego development: protect + conform

11:36 Ego development: outgrow AA

12:06 Ego development: AA harms

15:54 Ego development: AA is toxic

18:21 Who AA helps, harms, kills

19:01 Recovery + growth outside AA

20:26 "In Recovery" identity stunts growth

21:04 Dr. Wilson's multi solution approach

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 121 The Forward That Stole Your Power – Big Book Deconstruction #1

Fri, 22 Aug 2025 06:00:00 -0700

We’re kicking off a brand-new series deconstructing the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous — exposing the hidden messages, the power-stripping language, and the indoctrination baked into its pages.

In this episode, we unpack the Forward to the First Edition — where AA starts shaping how you see yourself, your “disease,” and your ability to choose your own recovery path. We’ll talk about how the language trains self-abandonment, why this sets you up for lifelong dependence on the program, and how to reclaim your agency.

Whether you’ve left AA, are thinking about leaving, or just want to understand the mechanics of its influence, this series will help you see the text with new eyes — and take your power back.

Timestamps:

00:00 Intro Big Book Deconstruction

01:22 Carrie's intro to the AA Big Book

04:20 AA sponsors as cult leaders

11:00 Kirsten's intro to the AA Big Book

14:50 AA Big Book Title page

20:32 Forward to First Edition

28:22 Bill decides we are "sick"

41:15 AA's care about the system not the people

47:07 Bill knows how we should live

54:50 We're allowed to feel angry

57:15 Bill's pitch to exploit us

1:00:20 MANY requirements for AA membership

1:13:09 Learning through AA mishaps

1:20:24 Can't separate AA good from AA harm

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 120 My Most Cringe AA Confession…

Wed, 20 Aug 2025 06:00:00 -0700

I’ve got a cringe confession from my AA days… one I’ve never shared until now. Since it’s my birthday week (and my book’s birthday too), today I’m revealing an AA secret that I haven't shared yet — and unpacking what that says about mind control, cult personality, and how far I’ve come in deprogramming.

I’ll share my AA cringe story and the story behind The Heartgasm Revolution book, and give you the free PDF this week to celebrate (links below).

Timestamps:

00:00 Most AA Cringe Moment Intro

01:27 Dedicated to Bill

05:39 Charles Manson Mind Control

06:46 Cult Persona

08:34 Healing Emotions in Sobriety

11:16 Heartgasms + Self Love

14:13 Your Free Gift!!

17:38 Committing to Courage

📕 Get The Heartgasm Revolution — A Mind Blowing Guide To Self Love

Free Book PDF https://www.sobrietybestie.com/free-book

Paperback Book https://amzn.to/4mTPSGV

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 119 Emotional Closure After AA — Grieving AA 6: Goodbye Letter

Mon, 18 Aug 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Leaving Alcoholics Anonymous can feel like walking away from your entire world — relationships, identity, purpose, safety, community, and structure. That’s why so many of us feel stuck in grief, even after we’ve left.

In Part 6 of the Grieving AA series, I’m sharing a powerful tool from the Grief Recovery Method — the Completion Letter. This is not about excusing harm or betraying yourself. It’s about ending the loop of overthinking, guilt, shame, and anger… and reclaiming your freedom.

Inside, you’ll learn:

✨ The 5 parts of the Goodbye Letter (and why they matter)
✨ How to speak your truth without judgment or guilt
✨ A ritual option to fully release AA and close that chapter of your life

Whether you write the letter, speak it aloud, or burn it in a ceremony, this process can help you cut the energetic tie, close the grief, and move forward without the weight of AA still on your shoulders.

Timestamps:

00:00 Grief Recovery Method completion letter intro

08:14 Writing the letter

09:02 The apologies

12:11 The forgiveness

13:11 Significant emotional truths

15:38 The Closure

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 118 Realizing the Truth About AA — Grieving AA 5: Acceptance

Fri, 15 Aug 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Acceptance after leaving Alcoholics Anonymous isn’t about forgiving abuse or sugarcoating the harm — it’s about choosing yourself and stepping into freedom.

In this episode of the Sobriety Bestie Podcast, I share what “acceptance” really means in the grieving process — without surrendering to AA’s powerlessness narrative. We’ll unpack:

Why acceptance is not the same as condoning
Breaking free from the “AA saved my life” myth
How to reclaim your power and stability outside the rooms
Journaling prompts to deepen your own acceptance and freedom

If AA was part of your life and leaving brought up grief, doubt, or relief, this is your space to get clarity and move forward on your terms.

📝 Journaling Prompts in this Episode:

What truth can you see now that you couldn’t before?
What no longer has a hold on you?
What parts of AA do you no longer need?
What beliefs are you choosing now?
What does freedom look like for you today?
What support system are you building?

Timestamps:

00:00 Acceptance after AA

05:00 Journaling prompts

13:32 Finding purpose after AA

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 117 Dark Night of The Soul After AA — Grieving AA 4: Depression

Thu, 14 Aug 2025 06:00:00 -0700

What if you never feel okay again after leaving AA? For many of us, there’s a crash after the anger fades — the loss of community, identity, and structure can feel like a dark night of the soul. It’s not failure — it’s grief.

In this episode of the Grieving AA series, we talk about the depression stage, why it happens, and how to navigate the “after-recovery void” between who you were in AA and who you’re becoming now. You’ll also get journaling prompts to help you move through this phase.

📝 Journaling Prompts in this Episode:

What feels heavy right now? Can you name it without fixing it?
What parts of yourself or life feel missing?
Have you felt this kind of fog before? What helped then?
What did AA give you that you’re afraid you’ll never find again?
What does your body need right now — rest, comfort, permission to not be okay?
What would it look like to meet yourself with compassion right now?

Timestamps:

00:00 Depression after leaving AA intro

08:04 Journal prompts

09:12 Dark night of the soul

14:46 This too shall pass

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 116 Why Part of You Still Wants to Go Back to AA — Grieving AA 3: Bargaining

Wed, 13 Aug 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Bargaining is a normal stage of grief — but when you’ve left AA, it can keep you stuck.

Maybe you’ve told yourself, “It wasn’t that bad,” “I can just take the good and leave the rest,” or “Maybe I was the problem.”

In this episode, I break down how AA culture trains us to bargain with harm, avoid the full truth, and even spiritualize abuse. I share real examples from my 10 years in AA, how I recognized my own bargaining, and how you can start unpacking it.

📌 Inside this video:

What bargaining looks like after leaving AA
How “take the good, leave the rest” keeps the programming alive
Spiritual bypassing and blame-shifting
Real-life examples from my time in AA
Journaling prompts to help you unpack it

📝 Journaling Prompts:

What part of you still wants to believe AA wasn’t that bad?
What are you afraid might happen if you admit the harm?
Have you told yourself you can “just take the good” even when you know the harm runs deeper?
What would it mean to fully face the truth about AA for you?
In what ways have you internalized the blame for what happened in AA?
Have you avoided unpacking your experience because you feel you “should be over it”?
What spiritual lessons (if any) are you using to justify your pain or your AA experience?
What do you gain by holding on to parts of AA — and what might it be costing you?

Timestamps:

00:00 Doubting your decision to leave AA intro

07:17 Journaling prompts

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 115 Why You’re So Angry at AA — Grieving AA 2: Anger

Tue, 12 Aug 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Are you still angry about what happened in AA — or that you were even there?

You're not alone. This episode dives into the second stage of grief after leaving Alcoholics Anonymous: anger.

I was stalked in AA. I was gaslit, misdiagnosed, manipulated — and told that feeling angry meant I was the problem. If anything like this sounds familiar, this one's for you.

Inside this episode:

🔥 Why anger is a valid, protective response
💔 What you're really grieving when you leave AA
🧠 How AA pathologizes normal human emotions
👀 The real meaning behind being called "resentful" or a "dry drunk"
✍️ Guided journaling prompts to help you process and heal

📝 Journaling Prompts in this Episode:

What am I angry about, even if I feel like I shouldn’t be?
Who or what do I feel betrayed by and why?
When I get angry about AA, if I do, what do I hear in my head that tries to silence me?
How might my anger be trying to protect me?
What might I say to a loved one who was angry in a similar situation?
What happens in my body when I let myself feel anger without making it wrong?

Timestamps:

00:00 Grieving AA: Anger intro

5:44 AA pathologized anger

12:08 Angry at an AA member

17:02 Journaling prompts

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 114 Was AA Really That Bad? — Grieving AA Part 1: Denial

Mon, 11 Aug 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Welcome to the Grieving AA series — a 6-part journey to untangle from Alcoholics Anonymous and reclaim your emotional freedom.

In this first episode, we unpack denial. What if the group that “saved your life”… was actually harming your mind? What if the thing you thought was spiritual… was a religious cult in disguise?

We’ll explore:

🧠 Cognitive dissonance (AA helped me / AA harmed me)
🧪 How gaslighting and indoctrination distort your self-trust
💔 Why denial makes sense after coercive control
✍️ Plus journaling prompts to help you pop out of the fog

Timestamps:

00:00 Grieving AA Denial Intro

05:40 What denial may look like

10:05 Journaling prompts

📝 Journaling Prompts in this Episode:

What parts of AA still feel helpful or comforting to you, and why?
Why do you feel loyal to AA if you do, and what does loyalty mean to you?
Have you ever downplayed your pain or made excuses for what happened in AA?
If what you experienced happened to a loved one, what would you tell them about it?
What are you afraid might happen if you fully let yourself question AA?
What would it mean to trust yourself even just a little bit more right now?

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 113 Bali Rehab Therapist Leaves AA — Mark’s Story

Fri, 08 Aug 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Mark, a former AA member, professional therapist, and addiction counselor, shares why he left Alcoholics Anonymous after four years and what happened next.

We talk about the uncomfortable truths inside the rooms, what it was like to be sober and rebellious, and how AA fed his ego instead of helping him heal.

Mark shares what it was like working in a rehab while quietly deprogramming from 12-step ideology — and why real healing required trusting himself, not a dogma.

Timestamps:

00:00 Intro

02:12 Why Did You Leave AA?

09:00 "AA Fed My Ego"

10:46 AA While Working At A Bali Rehab

13:34 Addiction Therapist Advice on AA

14:54 How AA Reacted To Him Leaving

17:58 Still sober?

21:05 What Deprogramming Was Like

23:57 Feeling Betrayed in AA

30:00 If You Left AA But Still Are "In Recovery"

32:36 Find Out Why You Drank

36:09 Learning To Trust Yourself Again

39:48 He Always Knew He'd Leave AA

45:13 A Big Thing To Work On

Mark's website

Mark's Facebook

Mark's Instagram

Join our free deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here → 🔓 AA Escape Kit click here

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

→ 🌀 Deprogram AA Course

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 112 Does AA Make Drinking Worse?

Wed, 06 Aug 2025 06:00:00 -0700

What if it’s not the booze — but the belief system?

In this episode of the Sobriety Bestie Podcast, we dive into Alan Marlatt’s 1973 expectancy experiment, featured in Resisting 12-Step Coercion by Stanton Peele.

This study throws a major wrench in AA’s core claim: the “physical allergy” to alcohol.

🔬 Study findings?

👉 People who thought they were drinking alcohol behaved more "drunk" — even when they weren’t.

👉 Those who were drinking but didn’t know it? No typical "alcoholic" behavior.

So… is it the alcohol or the expectation? Does AA’s ideology create a self-fulfilling prophecy that makes drinking worse?

📍 We’ll break down the study, bust the allergy myth, and explore how belief — not booze — might be the real trigger.

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 111 The Study That Shatters AA's Biggest Claim

Mon, 04 Aug 2025 06:00:00 -0700

You were told to leave AA is to drink — and to drink is to die. But what if the data says otherwise?

In this episode of the Sobriety Bestie Podcast, I break down one of the most important studies you’ve probably never heard of — the 1992 NLAES study conducted by the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism.

This massive, government-funded study followed thousands of people who met the criteria for alcohol dependence... and most of them got better without AA or treatment.

This episode dives into:

🧠 The myth of powerlessness
📉 What actual recovery stats show
🚫 The “real alcoholic” label as loaded language
📚 Highlights from Resisting 12-Step Coercion

🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 110 Midtown AA “13th Stepping” Scandal — Mandi’s Story

Fri, 01 Aug 2025 06:00:00 -0700

This is not just one woman’s story. It’s a window into what’s been allowed to happen behind closed doors in Alcoholics Anonymous.

At 15 years old, Mandi was sent to AA as a “troubled teen.” What followed was not recovery — it was manipulation, coercion, grooming, and systemic cover-up.

In this conversation, Mandi details how a so-called spiritual leader in the Midtown AA group in Washington, D.C. used his power to exploit underage girls — and how the group protected him.

This conversation exposes the underbelly of AA culture: the “13th stepping,” the spiritual gaslighting, the silence around sexual abuse, and the refusal to evolve.

Timestamps:

00:00 Intro Midtown AA Exploitation

01:44 Why It Was Hard To Leave AA

06:34 1990's "Troubled Teen" Sent To AA

9:19 Midtown AA Cult

12:15 Misdiagnosed As Alcoholic

17:54 Breaking Free From AA

22:50 Coercive Control in AA

27:45 13th Stepping Children

32:46 What Helped Her Heal

41:23 Red flags in AA

48:00 Societies Blind Spot to AA Harms

1:02:36 Sinclair Method + "No Meds" in AA

1:06:55 Cult Experts Won't Touch AA

1:09:55 If You're in A Rouge AA Group

1:17:49 Staying Safe From Predators

1:26:47 Leaving AA, Cocaine + ADHD Diagnosis

1:35:12 Sexual Abuse: Speaking Out + Not Being Believed

1:46:34 Men Get 13th Stepped Too

1:49:42 Trafficked To Other AA Groups

2:00:41 Shifting Public Consciousness on Addiction Recovery

Mandi's IG: https://www.instagram.com/mandiptalkspredators/

Mandi's Substack: https://mandiptalkspredators.substack.com/

Join our free deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here → 🔓 AA Escape Kit click here

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

→ 🌀 Deprogram AA Course

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 109 Why AA's Calls You Resentful When You Leave #CultyComments

Wed, 30 Jul 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Why does AA call you resentful just for leaving? In this episode of Culty Comments, we break down how the word resentment got rebranded from sin, why it’s weaponized against dissenters, and how AA uses emotional manipulation to keep you locked in.

If you've ever been called "bitter," "angry," or "a dry drunk" after walking away… this one's for you.

Join our free deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here → 🔓 AA Escape Kit click here

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→ 🌀 Deprogram AA Course

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 108 Preacher Exposes the Truth About AA—And I’m Shook

Mon, 28 Jul 2025 06:00:00 -0700

🚨 This Preacher Says AA Is Dangerous — And He Has a Bus to Prove It 🚌

In today’s reaction episode, we dive into a bold and controversial video titled "Alcoholics Anonymous Is Dangerous – Part 1" by Jim Battle.

This preacher isn’t holding back—and neither am I.

From cult recruitment tactics to the powerless indoctrination, we break down exactly why AA might not be what you think it is.

Original video AA Is Dangerous Pt 1

Orange Papers

00:00 – Intro AA Is Dangerous

01:10 – Meet Jim Battle, the preacher warning the world about AA

03:22 – The first thing wrong with AA

07:10 – Why “It works if you work it” is a lie

08:44 – Warning: AA kills people

12:20 – “AA Takes Lives”—What if that was the slogan?

13:36 – You are not powerless

23:50 – AA’s deceptive cult recruitment tactics

28:47 – AA never takes responsibility for deaths

29:50 – Court-ordered religion? Separation of church and state violation

Join our free deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here → 🔓 AA Escape Kit click here

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

→ 🌀 Deprogram AA Course

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 107 Big Book Thumper Leaves AA After 32 Years — Carrie's Story

Fri, 25 Jul 2025 06:00:00 -0700

After 32 years in Alcoholics Anonymous, Carrie walked away from the program she once lived and breathed. A retired VA nurse, dynamic speaker, and hardcore Big Book Thumper, Carrie sponsored thousands and climbed the service ladder—until she started asking herself the one question AA fears most: Do I actually believe this?

This powerful conversation dives into indoctrination, service burnout, identity loss, spiritual manipulation, predatory behavior in meetings, and the courage it takes to walk away. If you’re questioning AA, feeling trapped, or just want to hear a brutally honest story of breaking free—this one’s for you.

Carrie's substack: https://carrieengland.substack.com/

👇 Timestamps

00:00 Intro

04:02 Indoctrinated into hardcore AA

07:38 Core issues under drinking

09:20 Drunk on AA Kool-Aid

12:20 Cracks in AA brainwashing

17:01 Retired VA registered nurse for substance abuse

18:28 Elite AA & Getting Fired by a Sponsor

22:27 "I feel scammed"

26:38 Questioning AA + Sponsor Burnout

31:40 Her Big Regret from AA

36:40 AA is a Religious Cult

37:48 Leaving AA Feels Scary

40:41 Predators in AA

45:12 The First Days After Leaving

50:20 Coming Out Online About Leaving AA

53:41 AA Myths She No Longer Believes

58:34 What Surprised Her About Leaving

1:04:03 Cults Within the Cult

1:14:00 Alternatives to AA

1:15:10 Is She Still “in Recovery”?

1:18:30 Ego, Self-Esteem & Service

1:24:25 AA as Self-Medication

1:28:06 Learning to Trust Herself Again

Join our free deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here → 🔓 AA Escape Kit click here

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 106 Wait... Every AA Meeting is Toxic? #CultyComments

Wed, 23 Jul 2025 06:00:00 -0700

"Sorry You Missed That Part" — AA Indoctrination in Full View

Welcome to another episode of Culty Comments — where we break down the ideology, not the individual. Today we’re responding to a spicy little comment that accuses me of bashing AA, claims meetings have “personalities,” and confidently declares I’m going downhill (lol ok Bro).

But here’s the thing:

Cult members can view deconstructing as "bashing"

Mind control can trap us in survival

Deconstruction unlocks freedom

Join our free deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here → 🔓 AA Escape Kit click here

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

→ 🌀 Deprogram AA Course

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 105 The Dangerous AA Lie That Jordan Peterson Repeated

Mon, 21 Jul 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Jordan Peterson once helped me break free from AA's ideological grip.

But in this viral clip from Theo Von’s podcast, he repeats dangerous myths about Alcoholics Anonymous — calling it “psychologically intelligent” and denying the harm it causes.

So today, we're unpacking this AA propaganda in real time — from coerced confessions to forced religious conversion, and the global indoctrination that keeps people stuck in a cult disguised as recovery.

This isn’t about bashing Jordan or Theo — it’s about calling out misinformation that gets millions of people trapped in high-control systems.

Let’s critically think together.

⏱️ Timestamps:

00:00 – Intro Jordan Peterson on Alcoholics Anonymous

01:32 – Theo Von: 12 Steps Not Working?

02:52 – AA Alternatives? Why Are We Ignoring the Data?

05:22 – Ideological Possession in AA

10:02 – Peterson: The 12 Steps Are a Religion

12:10 – AA Is Exploitative (Here's How)

17:54 – Does AA Do Harm? (Peterson Says No…)

21:01 – AA’s Coerced Confession Culture

22:38 – AA’s Forced Religious Conversion

Join our free deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here → 🔓 AA Escape Kit click here

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

→ 🌀 Deprogram AA Course

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 104 Leaving 12 Step with Tara @BurnTheStigma

Fri, 18 Jul 2025 06:00:00 -0700

What if the thing you were told would save your life… was actually harming you the most?

In this raw and powerful episode, Tara from @BurnTheStigma shares how 10 years in AA and 12-step recovery impacted her more deeply — and more dangerously — than heroin ever did.

We unpack the hidden trauma of 12-step indoctrination, the slow unraveling of belief systems, and the courage it takes to walk away from something everyone says “works.”

Tara's Recovery Rebellion Podcast

Timestamps:

00:00 Intro with Tara Burn The Stigma

01:20 What Leaving AA Was Like

06:29 Growing Out of Addiction

10:08 Realizing AA is Harmful

13:01 ADHD in addiction and recovery

16:13 AA Wasn't Working

20:55 Starting to Deconstruct AA

24:54 AA is Dangerous

31:08 How Long is Deconstructing AA?

33:57 What's Been The Most Liberating?

41:30 The Power of Choice

53:28 Harm Reduction

57:56 Sobriety Wasn't The Goal

1:04:23 AA Affected Life More Negatively Than Heroin

1:07:08 Freedom Through Deconstructing AA

Are you on your deconstructing AA journey and want support?

Join our free deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

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Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 103 Dangerous False Choice AA Keeps Repeating #CultyComments

Thu, 17 Jul 2025 06:00:00 -0700

It’s Not a Loving Philosophy — It’s a Cult Religion.

Welcome back to Culty Comments — where we deconstruct the ideology of Alcoholics Anonymous so we can get free. Today’s comment says:

"The alcoholic death is worse than anything you can say about AA. I love AA, not perfection, but progress and life-saving philosophy of love and others paying it forward."

Let’s unpack this.

What if what looks like “love” is actually coercive control?

What if that “life-saving philosophy” is rooted in cult religion tactics and false binaries like “AA or death”?

And what if the people praising AA the loudest are also the most deeply controlled by it?

Join our free deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here → 🔓 AA Escape Kit click here

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

→ 🌀 Deprogram AA Course

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 102 You Won’t Believe What He Compared AA To #CultyComments

Wed, 16 Jul 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Someone Just Compared AA to a Gym… Seriously?!

In this episode of #CultyComments, we're unpacking a wild claim: that Alcoholics Anonymous is no more of a cult than a gym. 😳

I break down the real differences — including the shame, moral inventories, powerlessness, and threats of death — and share why this kind of ideology comparison is not just off, it's dangerous.

👉 If you’ve ever questioned AA or felt the residue of its ideology stuck in your head, you’re not alone. This episode is for those of us unpacking the thought reform and reclaiming our autonomy.

Are you on your deconstructing AA journey and want support?

Join our free deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here → 🔓 AA Escape Kit click here

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

How I Overcame Alcoholism TEDx talk

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 101 What is a Recovery Dharma Meeting Like?

Tue, 15 Jul 2025 06:00:00 -0700

What is a Recovery Dharma meeting actually like? I went to a Recovery Dharma meeting today so that I could report back to you with what one of their meetings is like.

Timestamps:

00:00 Intro: Recovery Dharma Meeting

01:54 How the Meeting Began

05:09 Introductions + Rituals

10:26 Meditation Format

13:26 Shares, Timers, and Group Dynamics

17:29 Closing Rituals + “Virtual Parking Lot” Explained

19:26 Final Thoughts on Recovery Dharma

I went to one for the very first time — no prep, no research — and here’s what happened.

If you’re curious about Buddhist-inspired recovery, or exploring alternatives to AA, this breakdown will help you feel it out.

From ancestral rituals to bell meditations to community shares, this is a full walk-through of my unfiltered experience. Spoiler: it’s very different from AA.

Are all Recovery Dharma meetings like this one? Drop your experience in the comments — let’s compare notes.

Recovery Dharma Meetings click here

Are you on your deconstructing AA journey and want support?

Join our free deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here → 🔓 AA Escape Kit click here

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

→ 🌀 Deprogram AA Course

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 100 AA's Step 4 Sent Steve-O to the Psych Ward

Mon, 14 Jul 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Diving deep for more AA propaganda, this time it's Steve O on Joe Rogan.

Timestamps:

00:00 Steve-O on Rogan: AA Indoctrination

03:33 Rehab $100K for 30 days?!

06:35 Inside Rehab: Meetings & Mind Control

09:40 Creepy Roommates & “Therapy”

11:22 12 Steps = Path to God

15:02 Step Work → Mental Health Crisis

16:30 Psych Ward After Step 4

18:53 Still Pushing AA?

23:01 “You’re Never Free” Lie

25:55 Always Recruiting, 1% Success

30:07 Pickle Myth & AA Logic

In this episode of the Sobriety Bestie Podcast, I react to Steve-O’s appearance on the Joe Rogan podcast — a textbook example of how AA ideology spreads through media and celebrity culture.

This isn’t just a recovery story. It’s AA propaganda wrapped in a personal narrative, and Joe Rogan’s reactions are… kind of perfect.

From $100,000 rehab bills to “you’re never free” indoctrination, this conversation exposes the emotional, financial, and psychological cost of AA’s outdated, unscientific model — including how Steve-O was institutionalized after doing the 12 steps.

Join our free deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here → → 🔓 AA Escape Kit

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

→ 🌀 Deprogram AA Course

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 99 Leaving AA, Unmasking Autism + Naltrexone – Josh’s Story

Sun, 13 Jul 2025 06:00:00 -0700

🧠 AUTISM, A.A., & THE SINCLAIR METHOD | A powerful deconstruction story 🎙️

00:00 – Intro AA, Autism, Sinclair Method

00:48 – What A.A. Was Like at First

03:16 – How Alcohol Helped Mask Autism Traits

04:31 – Discovering Autism + Reframing "Alcoholism"

09:39 – Critical Thinking & Cognitive Dissonance in A.A.

16:03 – The Moment He Knew He Had to Leave AA

20:58 – Starting the Sinclair Method

23:32 – Reading The Cure for Alcoholism

25:18 – Dr. Silkworth: The Myth That Built A.A.

27:46 – What Being on Naltrexone Actually Feels Like

33:55 – Realizing A.A. Is a Cult + Starting to Deprogram

42:00 – Books That Helped Him Escape A.A. Ideology

50:39 – Autism, Endorphins & Naltrexone

55:14 – Why You Need a Community After Leaving A.A.

58:13 – Autism, ADHD & Rethinking Sobriety

1:05:19– The Sinclair Method Stigma

1:11:49 – Using A.I. to Support a Divergent Brain

In this special episode of the Sobriety Bestie Podcast, Kirsten is joined by Josh — a subscriber, deconstructionist, and Sinclair Method success story — to unpack his experience leaving Alcoholics Anonymous, discovering his autism, and reclaiming his freedom.

If you've ever felt gaslit by A.A., misdiagnosed, or curious about alcohol harm reduction alternatives like Naltrexone and The Sinclair Method… this conversation will light you up.

Resources Mentioned:

Deprogramming AA YouTube: Quackaholics Anonymous

Sinclair Method YouTube: Thrive Alcohol Recovery

Sinclair Method Discord

📚 Books mentioned:

The Cure for Alcoholism by Roy Eskapa

Our Great Responsibility (Bill W's GSC talks)

More Revealed

US of A.A. by Joe Miller

👋 Want to join the Escape Kit community and get support deprogramming from A.A.?

🔓 AA Escape Kit → 🔓 AA Escape Kit

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 98 The Cure for Alcoholism – Book Review

Sat, 12 Jul 2025 06:00:00 -0700

📘 The Cure for Alcoholism — Book Review (Sinclair Method Deep Dive) Could a generic $2 pill actually reverse alcohol addiction?

🎙️ Timestamps:

00:00 – The Cure for Alcoholism

02:11 – Alcoholism cure: the core message

03:19 – How I’d get sober if I could go back

05:01 – Evidence based + FDA-approved since 1994

09:14 – What surprised me the most

10:50 – Alcohol Deprivation Effect

14:17 – Learning + unlearning addiction

19:30 – Drink your way sober

In today’s episode of the Sobriety Bestie Podcast, I’m reviewing The Cure for Alcoholism by Dr. Roy Eskapa — and I’m OBSESSED.

This book breaks down the science of the Sinclair Method in a way that’s practical, evidence-based, and radically more humane than the fear-based abstinence approaches most of us were handed.

If you’re looking for a gentle, science-backed alternative to rehab or AA… this book (and this video) is for you.

Join our free deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here → → 🔓 AA Escape Kit

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 97 Welcome to AA. Now Betray Yourself. #CultyComments

Fri, 11 Jul 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Did I really have free will in my first AA meeting… or was I coerced into self-identifying?

Today on Culty Comments, we’re unpacking the pressure, the mind control, and the emotional manipulation baked into Alcoholics Anonymous—starting with the forced identification as an "alcoholic."

🎯 In this episode:

The truth about group pressure and AA's identification rituals

Why “you can leave any time” is a myth rooted in thought reform

What happened when I tried not to say the words at my first meeting

How coercive control works in recovery—and why it’s so dangerous

Are you on your deconstructing AA journey and want support?

Join our free deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here → 🔓 AA Escape Kit click here

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 96 We Don’t Owe Bill Wilson’s Cult Anything #CultyComments

Thu, 10 Jul 2025 06:00:00 -0700

We don’t owe Bill Wilson’s cult religion sh*t.

In this episode of Culty Comments, I respond to a viewer who accuses me of being “not a real alcoholic,” rallying hate, and owing something to AA because I once benefited from it.

Let’s unpack the real issue: not toxic people… but toxic ideology.

👉 The guilt trip.

👉 The “real alcoholic” mind trap.

👉 The indoctrination that tells us we must give it away to keep it.

This episode isn’t about hate — it’s about deprogramming, reclaiming your mind, and getting free.

Are you on your deconstructing AA journey and want support?

Join our free deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here → 🔓 AA Escape Kit click here

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 95 Alcohol Addiction vs Social Media Addiction

Wed, 09 Jul 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Is TikTok trolling just bad behavior… or a hidden addiction?

00:00 Intro: Alcohol vs. TikTok Addiction

09:06 Why Trolls Lash Out

11:13 Long-Term Fallout: Cross-Addictions

12:36 Why TikTok Addiction Is Intense

13:27 AA Steppers & Trolling

14:09 AA and Cross Addictions: Deeper Truth

17:40 Healing Anxiety + Trauma Tangent

20:14 ADHD + Adderall Tangent

22:33 My AuDHD Optimization

In this episode of the Sobriety Bestie Podcast, we dive into the neuroscience behind alcohol addiction vs. social media addiction, and why AA trolls on TikTok might not be angry — they might be addicted to righteousness.

We explore dopamine, intermittent reinforcement, identity fusion, and trauma.

Then I tangent (hard) into how I healed my anxiety, optimized my ADHD brain without meds, and why critical thinking is the real path to freedom.

Are you on your deconstructing AA journey and want support?

Join our free deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here → 🔓 AA Escape Kit

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

What is a SMART Recovery meeting like?

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 94 How To Get Sober Without Rehab or AA (Advice To My Former Self)

Tue, 08 Jul 2025 13:15:00 -0700

If I could go back to 2009—right before I went to rehab and spent 10+ years in AA—this is what I wish I knew. In this video, I share 4 alternatives to rehab and Alcoholics Anonymous that could have saved me thousands of dollars and a decade of my life.

These tools are cheaper than rehab, faster than AA, and backed by science.

👇 Videos you may vibe with:

What is Sinclair Method

What is SMART Recovery?

AA Misdiagnosed Me As Alcoholic – I'm Actually Neurodivergent

👋 Want to join the Escape Kit community and get support deprogramming from A.A.?

🔓 AA Escape Kit → 🔓 AA Escape Kit

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

→ 🌀 Deprogram AA Course

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 93 Neuroscience Behind AA TikTok Trolls

Tue, 08 Jul 2025 06:00:00 -0700

AA TikTok trolls aren’t just passionate — they’re in a chemical loop.

00:00 Intro AA TikTok Trolls

02:43 Intermittent Reward

05:09 1. Dopamine — The Hook

05:44 2. Norepinephrine — The Rush

06:50 3. Endorphins — The Emotional Relief

07:46 4. Oxytocin — Tribal Belonging

08:37 5. Cortisol — The Trigger

10:07 Biochemical addictive loop

12:40 AA ideology fails us

This video breaks down the neuroscience behind their compulsive behavior, including dopamine addiction, trauma bonding, and identity fusion.

What looks like “sobriety” might actually be emotional dysregulation... disguised as spiritual recovery.

If you’ve ever felt attacked by an AA loyalist online — this will explain what’s likely going on inside their brain.

Are you on your deconstructing AA journey and want support?

Join our free deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here → 🔓 AA Escape Kit

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 92 AA Trolls and the Brain: Rage Addiction?

Mon, 07 Jul 2025 06:00:00 -0700

What are AA TikTok trolls actually drunk on? It’s not alcohol. It’s control, certainty, and the chemical high of outrage.

👇 TIMESTAMPS:

00:00 Intro AA Trolls Rage Addiction?

02:05 1. Ideological Possession

07:07 2. Reward-Seeking / Rage Addiction

09:40 Unhinged AA Member Kept Coming Back

11:47 3. Unhealed Trauma + Internalized Abuse

13:11 4. Deindividuation + Mob Mentality

16:02 Why TikTok Feels So Different from Other Platforms

This episode breaks down the neuroscience behind their behavior — and how social media addiction, ideological possession, and unresolved trauma create the perfect storm.

Join our free deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here → 🔓 AA Escape Kit

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 91 How 90 Days of AA Dissenting Changed Me

Sun, 06 Jul 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Today we're reflecting on doing 90 in 90 — not meetings, but 90 days of AA dissenting.

👇 TIMESTAMPS

00:00 90 in 90 intro

02:14 Breaking my anonymity online

03:40 Growth in 90 days of dissenting

08:02 Advice I'd give my getting sober self

13:56 Deconstructing AA journey

15:41 Most harmful part of AA

19:40 Taking your power back after AA

26:07 Speaking out about AA

31:36 What’s next for the channel + community

For the past three months, I’ve been deconstructing Alcoholics Anonymous out loud online. What started as a scary moment of “coming out” has turned into a massive awakening.

From reclaiming my power to unraveling the cult-like ideology of AA, here’s everything I’ve learned — and what I’d say to myself in 2009 before I ever set foot in a meeting.

🎧 If you’re navigating the after-recovery void, deprogramming from AA, or just curious about alternatives — this one’s for you.

Are you on your deconstructing AA journey and want support?

Join our free deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here → 🔓 AA Escape Kit

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 90 People Reversing Alcohol Addiction With A Pill?

Sat, 05 Jul 2025 06:00:00 -0700

💊 🍷 What Is a Sinclair Method Meeting Like? (My Honest Experience)

I didn’t even know The Sinclair Method had meetings — so I went to one! In this video, I’m sharing exactly what it was like: the vibe, the shares, how it compares to AA and SMART, and what I loved (and didn’t love) about it.

Welcome to the Sobriety Bestie Podcast — I’m Kirsten, and after 10 years in AA and 5 years of deprogramming, I’m exploring real alternatives to recovery dogma. Whether you're curious about harm reduction, neuroscience, or healing without the cult vibes, you're in the right place.

🎙️ Timestamps:

00:00 – What is a Sinclair Method meeting like?

02:58 – What is The Sinclair Method

05:35 – Why Sinclair Method has meetings

06:25 – What a TSM meeting was like

09:07 – What TSM shares are like

11:52 – My experience at the Sinclair Method meeting

14:37 – What I liked and didn’t like

Join our free deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here → 🔓 AA Escape Kit

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 89 How Cult Indoctrination Mirrors Addiction

Fri, 04 Jul 2025 06:00:00 -0700

How Cult Indoctrination Mirrors Addiction (with AA as the Case Study)

👇 TIMESTAMPS:

00:00 Intro Cult Indoctrination + Addiction

02:01 1. Dopamine-Driven Reinforcement

04:33 2. Withdrawal When You Question or Leave

08:12 3. Intermittent Reinforcement + Trauma Bonding

10:17 4. Identity Fusion = Neurological Compulsion

11:26 5. Rituals Become Self-Soothing Addictions

In this first episode of our Addiction Science series, we explore how high-control systems like Alcoholics Anonymous mirror the brain patterns of addiction — from dopamine-driven rewards to trauma bonding, identity fusion, and ritualized self-soothing.

If leaving AA felt like withdrawal, you’re not alone. And you’re not crazy — it’s neurological.

This video dives into how cult indoctrination hijacks the brain’s reward systems, creates emotional dependency, and wires obedience into your sense of safety. We break down the science, the psychology, and the lived experience of what it’s like to leave a system that felt like your only lifeline — and realize it was an addiction in disguise.

Whether you're deconstructing AA, leaving another high-control group, or simply curious about how cults mimic addiction... this one’s for you.

Are you on your deconstructing AA journey and want support?

Join our free deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here → 🔓 AA Escape Kit

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 88 The Most Deranged AA Comment Yet #CultyComments

Thu, 03 Jul 2025 06:00:00 -0700

In today’s Culty Comments episode, we’re breaking down one of the worst AA defender comments I’ve received — and that’s saying a lot. From made-up accusations to full-blown victim-blaming, this one went way beyond “spirited disagreement.”

Why do some people inside AA go this hard when someone speaks out?

Let’s talk about it in the comments— the projection, the spiritual bypassing, the mind control, and why it’s so hard to leave AA and speak your truth.

Join our deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 87 Brad Pitt Just Promoted AA to Millions — Here’s the Problem

Wed, 02 Jul 2025 06:00:00 -0700

🎬 Welcome to our new series: AA Propaganda

Brad Pitt just promoted AA to millions on Dax Shepard’s podcast which also got picked up on CNN and various news stations. What seems like an honest share is actually part of a much bigger problem…

When celebrities talk about Alcoholics Anonymous like it’s the one true path to recovery — without acknowledging its 1930s cult roots, religious doctrine, or total lack of modern science — it spreads ideology, not information.

This isn’t about Brad or Dax personally. It’s about how Alcoholics Anonymous has shaped culture, medicine, and minds through unexamined influence and media repetition.

This is how the indoctrination spreads.

Are you on your deconstructing AA journey and want support?

Join our free deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here → 🔓 AA Escape Kit

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 86 Drink Your Way Sober? (The Sinclair Method)

Tue, 01 Jul 2025 06:00:00 -0700

🍷 What Is The Sinclair Method? (Drink to Sobriety?)

Is it actually possible to drink your way sober? Sounds wild — but the Sinclair Method is a real, evidence-based approach to ending alcohol addiction without cold turkey, meetings, or shame.

After 10 years in AA and 5 years out, I’m diving deep into recovery alternatives that don’t require surrendering your life or identity. If you’re sober, sober curious, or just want options that aren’t culty church basements… this one’s for you.

🎙️ Timestamps:

00:00 – Intro: What is The Sinclair Method?

01:26 – Abstinence culture

02:59 – What is Sinclair Method?

06:25 – How Sinclair Method differs

07:26 – Why Sinclair Method is not mainstream

11:38 – Step 1: Learn about TSM

15:03 – Step 2: Get a Naltrexone prescription

16:35 – Step 3: Drink with Naltrexone

17:17 – Step 4: It’s a process, not a miracle

18:48 – Step 5: Sinclair Method support & community

Cravings fade. Drinking often declines. Sobriety may naturally follow.

No powerlessness. No steps. No lifelong labels.

Just neuroscience + consistency.

Join our free deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here → 🔓 AA Escape Kit

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 85 Alcoholism: Fatal, Progressive Disease… or Reversible Habit?

Mon, 30 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Is Alcohol Addiction a Fatal Progressive Disease… or Just a Reversible Habit?

Let’s unpack one of the most fear-based ideas in AA — the “disease doing pushups in the parking lot.”

Spoiler: it’s not real. But something IS happening in the brain… and it’s actually reversible.

🎙️ Timestamps:

00:00 – Fatal progressive or habit intro

03:10 – Fatal progressive disease mythology

07:41 – Consequences of AA ideology

09:59 – Fatal progressive disease roots

14:16 – Alcohol deprivation effect

18:29 – The Sinclair Method

20:13 – Why Sinclair Method is unknown

We’re diving into propaganda, brain wiring, and how modern science debunks 1930s recovery mythology. This episode kicks off my AA Alternatives series — so if you’ve ever questioned what you were told in the church basement, this is for you.

Join our free deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here → 🔓 AA Escape Kit

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 84 Blinded by the Big Book #CultyComments

Sun, 29 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

What do you call it when someone is so deep in AA ideology, they literally can’t see reality anymore?

In today’s Culty Comments, we unpack a wild comment that accuses me of “k*lling the real alcoholic” — all because I dared to say I’m not one. From purple-glasses metaphors to brainwashing cracks, we’re diving into ideological possession, thought control, and the bizarre ways AA defenders protect the system at all costs.

🧠 Topics inside:

What is ideological possession?

“Real alcoholic” as a control tactic

Why AA defenders can’t let you leave

The culty death-threat language hidden in “spiritual growth”

And yes… the Big Book glasses

Join our deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 83 The AA "Real Alcoholic" Gaslight #CultyComments

Sat, 28 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

What happens when someone says AA worked for them — but they never did a 4th step, and now they can socially drink?

In today’s episode of Culty Comments, we unpack the wild logic of “real alcoholic” rhetoric, circular definitions, and why AA defenders erase anyone who doesn’t fit the narrative. Plus… did someone really claim AA is scientific because Dr. Bob was a rectal surgeon?!

Let’s talk about:

The No True Scotsman fallacy in AA

Stepper-splaining and circular dogma

Why questioning AA = instant exile

Join our deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here → 🔓 AA Escape Kit

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course: → 🌀 Deprogram AA Course

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 82 What is SMART Recovery? | AA Alternatives Ep 02

Fri, 27 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Today I share an overview of SMART Recovery—what it is, how it works, and how it compares to AA. I attended my first SMART Recovery meeting and completed the facilitator training to better understand the structure, tools, and philosophy behind the program.

Timestamps:

00:00 – What is SMART Recovery intro

03:14 – What is SMART Recovery?

05:41 – Who is SMART Recovery for?

06:39 – Core features of SMART Recovery

09:08 – How SMART differs from AA

13:16 – What SMART meetings are like

14:17 – SMART Recovery resources

SMART Recovery is a science-based approach that supports people in changing addictive behaviors without labels, powerlessness, or a spiritual requirement. It emphasizes tools, self-management, and personal growth.

This video is part of a larger series exploring non–12-step recovery paths for those looking for alternatives to AA or the lifelong recovery model.

If you’ve participated in SMART Recovery or facilitated meetings, feel free to share your insights in the comments. Your experience may help others explore this option.

Join our deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

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Ep 81 What a SMART Recovery Meeting Is Like | AA Alternatives Ep 01

Thu, 26 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

My First SMART Recovery Meeting: What It Was Really Like

Today I’m sharing my honest experience going to a SMART Recovery meeting for the first time — even though I’ve been sober since 2009 and wasn’t looking for support getting sober. I did it to explore non-12-step recovery options and expand the conversation beyond AA.

👇 Timestamps

00:00 What SMART Recovery is like intro

02:11 Who SMART is for

02:57 Why I didn't go to SMART to get sober

03:44 I went to an online SMART meeting

07:25 SMART Recovery meeting starts

09:48 SMART Recovery check-ins

12:06 Guide vs Guru (and what the training actually says)

14:13 What SMART shares are like

19:26 How SMART talked about AA

21:50 SMART meeting ending

In this episode, I break down what happened in the meeting, how it felt, how SMART compares to AA, and what surprised me (both good and not-so-good). If you’re deconstructing AA or just curious about SMART Recovery, this is for you.

📚 I also completed SMART Recovery’s training this week, so I’ll be sharing more non-12-step resources here soon. Let’s build the playlist together!

🎯 WHO THIS IS FOR:

— People deconstructing from AA

— Folks looking for science-based recovery

— Anyone curious about SMART Recovery

— Sober people wanting connection, tools, and community (not dogma)

Join our deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here → → 🔓 AA Escape Kit

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 80 Why Is AA Adverting Now? #CultyComments

Wed, 25 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Is AA really attraction not promotion as it's traditions state? Let’s Talk About Those Billboards… 🚨⛓️

AA claims attraction, not promotion — but national billboard campaigns, train ads, and bus stop posters tell a different story. In this episode of #CultyComments, we break down a recent 2024 paid ad campaign by Alcoholics Anonymous and explore why they might be ramping up promotion now.

🎯 Is this a sign that AA is struggling to survive?

💥 Is it gaslighting to call this “not advertising”?

🧠 And what are they trying to sell you, really?

We’ll also talk about:

• Why these ads contradict AA’s core traditions

• Whether meeting attendance is declining

• How “attraction, not promotion” functions as a form of ideological control

• And what it really costs to go to AA — financially and psychologically

Join our deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the kit:

→ 🔓 AA Escape Kit

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 79 AA Cult Logic: You’re The Problem #CultyComments

Tue, 24 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Rule #1 of a cult? It’s not a cult. Rule #2? You’re the problem.

In this episode of #CultyComments, we dive into a classic AA-defender mindset: “You’re just bashing AA—you offer nothing helpful!” But what happens when you do offer resources... and they still say you’re wrong?

🧠 This video explores:

— Why AA ideology can’t tolerate dissent

— The gaslighting built into “it works if you work it”

— Why deconstructing AA ≠ bashing

— And why AA’s tiny market share proves it's not “the only way”

Continue your deconstructing AA journey with free resources and a community inside the Escape Kit.

→ 🔓 AA Escape Kit

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 78 How AA Is Like Scientology Ep 01 — AA vs Cult

Mon, 23 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

AA vs. Cult: How Is Alcoholics Anonymous Like Scientology?

In our new series AA vs. Cult series, we’re unpacking how Alcoholics Anonymous mirrors the structure, control, and indoctrination tactics of high-control groups — starting with Scientology.

Join our deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the

→ 🔓 AA Escape Kit

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TIkTok @SobrietyBestie

💬 Let’s Connect

IG @SobrietyBestie

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Ep 77 Why Do Smart People Join Cults #CultyComments

Sun, 22 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Realizing you were in a cult changes everything.

In this episode of #CultyComments, I respond to someone who says being in AA makes you weak, codependent, and pathetic. But here’s the truth: being in a cult doesn’t mean you’re broken—it means you’re human. And waking up to it? That’s power.

We get into:

— Why cults prey on smart, high-functioning people

— The gaslighting baked into AA’s “you’re the problem” mindset

— Why realizing AA is a cult can be very liberating

— And how deconstructing AA unlocks freedom

Join our deprogramming AA Community and get free resources

in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit here → 🔓 AA Escape Kit

Want to dive deeper?

Join my Deprogramming AA course: → 🌀 Deprogram AA Course

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 76 30 Years in AA and Can’t Handle Critical Thinking #CultyComments

Sat, 21 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Thinking critically isn't dangerous. It’s only “dangerous” to AA ideology — and that’s exactly why it matters.

In this episode of #CultyComments, we break down a response from someone 30 years into AA who says my "Why I Left AA" video should be taken down.

In this episode:

— How AA identity creates fear of other perspectives

— Why “you’ll drink if you leave” is toxic programming

— What makes deconstructing AA a positive, life-giving process

— And why you're allowed to think critically, trust yourself, and get free

Join our deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here:

→ 🔓 AA Escape Kit

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 75 Getting sober from AA, not alcohol #CultyComments

Fri, 20 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

AA isn’t the only way—and this channel isn’t about getting sober. We are in our deconstructing AA era. Two different problems.

In this episode of #CultyComments, we respond to someone confused about the difference. They ask: “What’s the positive solution?” But what if the solution is deconstructing the harmful beliefs AA installs?

We’re talking:

The myth of one-size-fits-all recovery

Why “just be positive” = spiritual bypassing

AA ideology as mental scaffolding that needs to be dismantled

Thinking critically is how we deconcstruct

👉 If you’re here to reclaim your voice, not follow a script—this is your place.

Join our deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit

here:

→ 🔓 AA Escape Kit

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

AA Cult Religion Origins

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 74 Deconstructing AA: More Was Revealed 5 Years After Leaving

Thu, 19 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

More was revealed… even five years after leaving AA.

I thought I was done deconstructing. I thought I had moved on. But the deeper I spoke, researched, and connected — the more AA’s ideology kept showing up in my mind.

In this episode of the Sobriety Bestie Podcast, I share:

🧠 How AA’s programming lingers long after we leave

📉 Why “more freedom” is possible after the escape

📣 What I’ve learned from speaking out publicly

🛠️ The tools + playlists that helped me deconstruct even further

🏛️ Why AA’s ideology is more like a mental structure than a memory

🧳 And how you can start unpacking it, too

Whether you left AA last week or 15 years ago — if you’re still feeling its grip, this is for you.

Let’s unlearn, get free, and reclaim our truth together.

YouTube playlists mentioned:

AA Mind Control

Yes AA is a Cult

Grab your free deprogram AA resources and community:

→ 🔓 AA Escape Kit

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

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Ep 73 Did Bill Wilson Get Sober on LSD?

Wed, 18 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Did Bill Wilson—the founder of Alcoholics Anonymous—actually get sober on LSD? It’s a rumor that won’t die… but is there any truth to it?

Let's break down where this myth came from, what really happened during Bill’s detox, and the actual hallucinogens involved in his early sobriety (hint: it wasn’t acid 👀).

We’ll also explore:

🍄 The truth about Bill’s later use of LSD in the 1950s

🧠 The Belladonna treatment he received in the hospital

⛪ The Oxford Group’s role in his spiritual conversion

💊 What psychedelics have to do with modern recovery

💬 And why this rumor might not be as wild as it seems…

Timestamps:

00:00 Bill got sober on LSD?

01:16 He was on hallucinogens

02:29 Psychedelics and sobriety

05:32 Bill W. took LSD

Grab your free AA Escape Kit here:

→ 🔓 AA Escape Kit

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 72 Exposing the "AA Bashing" Smear #CultyComments

Tue, 17 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Ever been accused of “AA bashing” just for telling the truth?

In this #CultyComments episode, we break down why that phrase gets thrown around so fast — and what it actually reveals about cult psychology. Spoiler: it's not about your tone. It's about their programming.

Inside this episode:

🚩 Why “AA bashing” is a classic thought-stopping tactic

🧠 How cults use language to silence dissent

🔥 Why feedback feels threatening to the indoctrinated

📕 What Lifton’s criteria say about this exact behavior

Calling truth-telling “bashing” is a red flag — not because it hurts AA, but because it exposes it.

Ready to start deconstructing AA? Grab your free:

→ 🔓 AA Escape Kit

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 71 Why the Serenity Prayer Was Never Meant for AA – Cult Religion Part 6 of 6

Mon, 16 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

The Serenity Prayer wasn’t written for Alcoholics Anonymous — It was written to resist authoritarianism. And its author likely would’ve hated that AA uses it.

In Part 6 of the AA Cult Religion Origins series, we uncover how AA co-opted the Serenity Prayer from theologian Reinhold Niebuhr — a fierce critic of the Oxford Group and moral absolutism — and stripped it of its true meaning.

Inside this episode:

🔎 Who really wrote the Serenity Prayer

⚠️ Why he opposed the Oxford Group (AA’s cult roots)

🧠 How AA repurposed a resistance prayer into a tool for obedience

📿 The disturbing irony behind chanting it at meetings

The Serenity Prayer was never about passive acceptance — it was about moral courage. Yet AA uses it to reinforce powerlessness, surrender, and group control.

This isn’t just a borrowed prayer. It’s another layer of AA’s myth, appropriation, and dishonesty.

Ready to start deconstructing AA? Grab your free:

→ 🔓 AA Escape Kit

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

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Ep 70 The Truth About the 12 Steps – Cult Religion Part 5 of 6

Sun, 15 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

The 12 Steps weren’t created to help you recover — They were designed to make you surrender to God.

In Part 5 of our Cult Religion series, we uncover the real origin of the 12 Steps. Not trial and error. Not divine inspiration. They were lifted directly from the Oxford Group — a 1930s religious cult obsessed with sin, confession, and absolute surrender to God.

Inside this episode:

🔎 Where each step really came from

⚠️ How religious control was disguised as “recovery”

🤯 How Bill Wilson didn’t invent the steps

📖 The disturbing links between AA’s program and moral re-armament tactics

💥 The steps were never a medical solution. They were a religious conversion tool. And most of us had no idea.

Ready to start deconstructing AA? Grab your free:

→ 🔓 AA Escape Kit

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 69 AA's Hidden Years – Cult Religion 4 of 6

Sat, 14 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

AA was NOT founded in 1935 — the early years were hidden.

In this episode, we unpack AA’s “hidden years” — when the group wasn’t AA at all, but was still operating entirely inside the authoritarian Oxford Group cult religion.

Timestamp:

00:00 AA cult religion origins intro

01:01 OG "AA" meetings

04:19 Bill's split from Oxford Group

07:12 Crafting AA's 12 steps

Want guidance in your deconstructing AA process? If so, you can check out my Deprogramming AA course here:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Ep 68 When AA Says Dissent Is Murder #CultyComments

Fri, 13 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

“Do you think your videos have killed anyone?”

Someone really said that — and it’s not uncommon. In culty systems, dissent isn’t just frowned upon — it’s framed as deadly.

In this #CultyComments episode, we unpack why Alcoholics Anonymous defenders go to extremes like this. Why does speaking out about AA’s harm get twisted into killing people? Why is truth treated like a threat?

We’ll break down:

The culty roots of AA’s 12 Steps

The ideology behind calling critics dangerous

Why telling the truth isn’t the harm — it exposes it

And what’s actually causing damage inside the rooms

Ready to start deconstructing AA? Grab your free:

→ 🔓 AA Escape Kit

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 67 Why AA Belittles Your Exit #CultyComments

Thu, 12 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

“What’s so courageous about leaving AA?” Well... let’s talk about it.

If you’ve ever tried to leave Alcoholics Anonymous after fully buying in, you already know: it’s not just leaving the rooms. It’s walking away from an identity, a belief system, a community, and a mountain of fear-based programming that told you you’d die without it.

In this Culty Comment episode, I break down why leaving AA is one of the most courageous things many of us will ever do — and why people who mock that don’t understand indoctrination, identity-level control, or phobia programming.

Ready to start deconstructing AA? Grab your free:

→ 🔓 AA Escape Kit

Want to dive deeper? Join my Deprogramming AA course:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 66 Bill W Was Coerced Into A Cult – Cult Religion 3 of 6

Wed, 11 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

How Bill W was coerced into a cult.. Bill W was drugged on Belladonna in an alcohol rehab center when he was coerced into a cult religion.

For a year prior to that, Bill Wilson was aggressively recruited into the Oxford Group — a fundamentalist cult religion — by his friend Ebby then he became its proselytizer.

What we were taught about the “birth of AA” is a false narrative.

Timestamps:

00:00 AA cult religion origins intro

02:00 Ebby's coerced conversion

02:48 Ebby coerces Bill's conversion

06:58 Generational recovery trauma

08:46 Bill starts deceptively proselytizing

11:48 Spiritual experience or coerced conversion?

Want guidance in your deconstructing AA process? If so, you can check out my Deprogramming AA course here:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 65 The Cult Religion That Birthed AA – Cult Religion 2 of 6

Tue, 10 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Today we’re going deep into the cult that birthed Alcoholics Anonymous: The Oxford Group.

AA didn’t start as an independent program — it was copied almost point-for-point from a religious cult with authoritarian, even fascist-tinged, ideology.

00:00 AA cult religion DNA intro

01:02 Oxford Group + Alcoholics Anonymous

04:03 AA copied Oxford Group core practices

06:14 Social control + structure

08:58 Psychological control techniques

10:05 Authoritarianism + fascist

Once you see the DNA of where AA really came from — you can start to truly deconstruct its hold on your mind.

Want guidance in your deconstructing AA process? If so, you can check out my Deprogramming AA course here:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 64 Why AA Lies About It's Origins – Cult Religion 1 of 6

Mon, 09 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Why does Alcoholics Anonymous STILL hide its origin?

In this first episode of the AA Cult Religion DNA series, we’re diving deep into the mythology vs. reality of how AA really began — and why the truth has been covered up for nearly 100 years.

Was it really founded in 1935?

Why are the Oxford Group cult religion roots missing from AA’s official story?

And what does this deceptive recruiting mean for those of us who trusted AA?

Want guidance in your deconstructing AA process? If so, you can check out my Deprogramming AA course here:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 63 Debunking the "AA Saves Millions" Myth #CultyComments

Sun, 08 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

In today’s Culty Comments episode, we’re breaking down a classic fear-based Alcoholics Anonymous defense: “AA saves millions — your message could kill people!”

Is it "badmouthing" to talk about the actual harms of a system? Or… is the system the one doing harm? 🤔

We’ll unpack:

✅ The myth of “millions saved” (with no data to back it)

✅ How AA defenders use emotional blackmail to silence dissent

✅ Why questioning the system is NOT the same as harming people

✅ How coercive control works in AA ideology

We are waking up to cult tactics in 2025. Talking about harm is not harm — it’s healing. Let’s get free.

Deprogramming AA course:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 62 When AA Has To Make You The Problem #CultyComments

Sat, 07 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

AA Makes You the Problem — Culty Comments Breakdown

Today’s Culty Comment is packed with manipulation tactics straight out of the AA ideology playbook. We’re going to break it down so you can see:

✅ Dissent is pathologized

✅ They question your motives

✅ You become the problem if you see through the ideology

⚠️ Remember — this isn’t about the commenter. It’s about the ideology that speaks through them — and how this shows up in so many interactions when you leave AA or start questioning it. This is about YOUR freedom.

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

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Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 61 How He Rebuilt His Life After Leaving AA – Bob's Story

Fri, 06 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

How he rebuilt his life after leaving AA (Bob's story) is our first episode in what will be an ongoing series of sharing real stories of people who have left Alcoholics Anonymous and are building vibrant lives beyond the rooms.

You know.. a little what it was like, what happened that made us leave AA and what it's like now...

Some of you requested to hear other people's stories of leaving AA, so let's go!

Today, I’m joined by Robert who I met in the rooms in 2009. He shares openly about his journey, insights, and reflections on Alcoholics Anonymous and on rebuilding his life after leaving AA.

Timestamps:

00:00 Intro Bob's story

04:36 Critically thinking while in AA

14:22 Building community after AA

18:34 Deprogramming AA course

20:17 Taking your power back

23:15 5 Years after leaving AA reflections

27:34 The 13th step

29:20 Anxiety about speaking out

Want to go deeper in your deprogramming AA journey? Check out my Deprogramming AA online course Bob spoke about in this video, here's the link:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 60 Why AA Members Deny Your Experience #CultyComments

Thu, 05 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Why do AA members deny your experience? Why do they say, “I never saw that, so it didn’t happen”? In today’s Culty Comments episode, I break down a classic AA defense tactic — and show how it’s rooted in AA ideology, not reality.

If you've ever had your experience dismissed by someone in AA… this video will help you see what’s really going on — and why it’s not about you.

Want to dive deeper into your deprogramming? Check out my online course:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 59 The Truth About “I’m an Alcoholic” #CultyComments

Wed, 04 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

AA’s most brainwashing line? Let’s break it down. In today’s Culty Comments episode, I respond to a comment defending the classic AA identity statement: “Hi, I’m [Name], and I’m an alcoholic.”

We’ll dissect the culty ideology behind this humiliation ritual and why it keeps members trapped in obedience and free labor for Bill’s program. If you’re on your own deprogramming journey — or wondering if you are — this one’s for you.

Want to dive deeper into your deprogramming? Check out my online course:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 58 Yes, AA is a Cult – part 4 of 4

Tue, 03 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Yes AA is a cult. For me, leaving AA was harder than getting sober — it can take serious courage to break free.

In this final video of my Yes, AA is a Cult series, we finish walking through the International Cultic Studies Association’s 15-point cult checklist .

Timestamps:

00:00 AA is a cult intro

02:10 13 – Inordinate time demands

08:30 14 – Insular social circles

13:40 15 – No life outside the group + fear to leave

19:26 Yes, AA is a cult conclusion

If you’ve felt trapped in AA, or struggled to fully leave it behind, this will resonate. And if you’re ready for deeper support, check out my Deprogram course:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 57 Yes, AA is a Cult – part 3 of 4

Mon, 02 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Welcome to Part 3 of our Yes, AA is a Cult series.

Today, we're breaking down Points 9–12 of the Cult Checklist from the International Cultic Studies Association (ICSA) — and diving deep into how guilt, shame, recruitment, and financial manipulation are baked into the culture of Alcoholics Anonymous.

Timestamp:

00:00 AA is a cult intro

01:09 9 – Guilt & shame as control

08:01 10 – Cut ties & change goals

13:20 11 – Recruitment

17:44 12 – Money

Want to dive deeper into your deprogramming? Check out my online course:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 56 AA Shames Speaking Out As A ‘Defect’ #CultyComments

Sun, 01 Jun 2025 06:00:00 -0700

AA made “obsession” a bad word — but for many of us (autistic, ADHD, neurodivergent), deep focus is just how our brains work.

My work since 2012 has been to solve a major problem I went through then turn around and guide others through it on social media and in paid online courses. This is literally my job. So to call me "obsessed" with my current topic is like calling a barista obsessed with coffee, or a McDonald's worker obsessed with hamburgers.

It's like, Bro, why you gotta pathologize work? And why make my natural wiring a "character defect?"

But it's obvious why -- because it's not about "obsession," it's about AA. When you believe the AA ideology you can't tolerate those who don't and dare claim their story and voice. It feels like a threat. But that doesn't mean those who leave should stay anonymous and have no support. We deserve better.

Timestamps:

00:00 AA Makes Reality Wrong

02:30 AA demonizes obsession

07:47 Control or change the channel?

09:32 Devaluing AA deprogramming

12:13 It's about AA, not about obsession

Want to deep dive deprogram in an online course?

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 55 The AA Guilt Trip That Keeps You Stuck #CultyComments

Sat, 31 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

In this episode of Culty Comments, we break down a classic guilt-laced message straight from the AA playbook — and unpack how emotional debt keeps so many people stuck.

Is it really “help” if you’re made to feel forever obligated?

Is it service… or subtle control?

Let’s talk about what’s actually going on underneath the slogans.

If you've ever felt like you "owe" AA your life — this one's for you.

Want to deep dive deprogram in an online course?

🌀 Deprogram AA Course, click here

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 54 Yes, AA is a Cult – part 2 of 4

Fri, 30 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

YES, AA is a cult. This is art 2 of a 4-part series comparing Alcoholics Anonymous to the “Characteristics Associated with Cultic Groups” by Michael D. Langone, Ph.D. (International Cultic Studies Association).

In this episode, we'll cover checklist points 5–8 with how they can show up inside Alcoholics Anonymous.

If you’ve ever heard “don’t trust your thinking,” or “outside help won’t work,” you’ve lived this.

Timestamps:

00:00 Yes, AA is a cult intro

01:14 5 – The group is elitist

06:28 6 – Us-versus-them mentality

12:45 7 – Leaders are not accountable

18:12 8 – Ends justify the means mentality

Want to dive deeper into your deprogramming? Check out my online course:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 53 Yes, AA is a Cult – part 1 of 4

Thu, 29 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Welcome to our AA is a cult series. You came to get sober. You got indoctrinated.

This series is explores Alcoholics Anonymous as a cult. We'll go point by point through the “Characteristics Associated with Cultic Groups” by Michael D. Langone, Ph.D. from the International Cultic Studies Association, comparing AA to cult characteristics.

This episode covers the first 4 traits on the checklist to explore AA is a cult.

Timestamps:

00:00 AA is a cult intro

06:50 Cult within a cult

08:58 1 – AA has absolute truth

13:58 2 – Doubt + dissent discouraged

17:06 3 – Mind-altering practices to suppress doubt

19:46 4 – Members told how to think, act, and fee

29:25 Yes, AA is a cult

Want to dive deeper into your deprogramming? Check out my online course:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 52 Defending AA or Exposing It? You Decide! #CultyComments

Wed, 28 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Welcome to our new series: Culty Comments — where we break down real AA dogma defender comments from the internet and unpack the Alcoholics Anonymous ideology hiding underneath.

This isn’t about the commenters themselves. It’s about the thought reform they’re parroting — and how it keeps so many of us trapped.

This series is for anyone deprogramming from AA and waking up their critical thinking again. Let's get freee!

Want to dive deeper into your deprogramming? Check out my online course:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 51 How AA Controls Your Mind – part 8 of 8: Dispensing of Existence

Tue, 27 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

How AA Is Controlling Your Mind part 8 of 8. Today we unpack one of the most disturbing tactics of all: Dispensing of Existence. 😳

Inside Alcoholics Anonymous, you’re either a disciple or you’re in danger.

If you stay, you’re “spiritually fit.” If you leave, you’re erased. Labeled a ticking time bomb. A danger to others. Spiritually dead.

This episode breaks down:

🔹 How AA makes you fear life outside the program

🔹 Why people shun you when you leave (and what that really means)

🔹 The cult-coded language that equates leaving with dying

🔹 Why your identity, safety, and existence are only “valid” inside the system

🔹 And how Bill W. sold it all with a pitch, not a prescription

If you’ve ever felt ghosted, dismissed, or demonized for walking away from AA — this is the episode you’ve been waiting for.

Here's the video I mentioned: 30 Signs of Emotional Manipulation

🧘🏼‍♀️ FREE RESOURCES to jumpstart your evolution 👇

📖 30 Signs of Emotional Manipulation Guide

🧠 Neurodivergent Discovery Portal

🧘🏼‍♀️ GO DEEPER with the online deprogramming AA course👇

Ep 50 How AA Controls Your Mind – part 7 of 8: Doctrine Over Person

Mon, 26 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Welcome back to our Deprogramming AA series — 8 Signs AA Is Controlling Your Mind. In this episode, we’re diving into Doctrine Over Person, a hallmark of mind control tactics from Dr. Robert Jay Lifton’s thought reform framework.

🧠 Inside AA, your personal experiences, trauma, instincts, and emotions are often dismissed if they conflict with the doctrine — the Big Book, the steps, the slogans, or a sponsor's opinion. You're told:

“That's not in the book.”
“You’re in denial.”
“You didn’t do it right.”
“You need to do more steps.”

That’s how the doctrine always wins. You are gaslit into distrusting yourself.

In this episode, I talk about:

How trauma is reframed as your fault ("What's your part in it?")
How doubt is labeled denial
How questioning is pathologized
Why “It works if you work it” is a blame-loop, not a helpful slogan
The hypocrisy of AA dismissing modern science and outside help
How the doctrine overrides common sense, self-trust, and even medical care

And I share a vulnerable story: the time I was told to make amends to someone who harmed me, and how I now see the steps were often a vehicle for suppressing trauma, not healing it.

🧘🏼‍♀️ GO DEEPER WITH ONLINE COURSES 👇

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 49 AA Amends Can Harm Trauma Survivors

Sun, 25 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

What happens when a trauma survivor is told inside Alcoholics Anonymous that they need to make amends… for their own abuse?

Today we're looking at the disturbing truth about how the 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous can retraumatize survivors, especially women. From misguided sponsorship to silence baked into AA culture, this clip from the Group Thinking Podcast exposes the emotional and psychological harm caused by the amends process.

Want help deprogramming AA?

🌀 Deprogram AA Course here

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

@SobrietyBestie

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 48 What Made Me Question AA After 10 Years?

Sat, 24 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

I was in AA for 10 years then something began to shift, AA started to no longer seem true.

If you’re in that in-between space—questioning, unraveling, sensing that something’s off—you are not bananas. You’re waking up.

Want help deprogramming, check out my Deprogram AA course:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

P.S. Here's the video I mention, What made AA ideology shatter

Ep 47 How AA Controls Your Mind – part 6 of 8: Loaded Language

Fri, 23 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

AA’s language isn’t just weird — it’s weaponized.

In Part 6 of this 8-part series on How AA Controls Your Mind, we break down Loaded Language — one of the most powerful (and dangerous) tactics used in high-control groups like Alcoholics Anonymous.

From phrases like “Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic” to “Feelings aren’t facts” and “It works if you work it,” AA uses thought-stopping slogans to control identity, shut down thinking, and keep you locked into the system.

Deprogramming AA course:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 46 How AA Controls Your Mind - part 5 of 8: Sacred Science

Thu, 22 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

🎙️ 8 Signs AA Is Controlling Your Mind – Part 5: Sacred Science

Welcome to the Sobriety Bestie Podcast. I'm Kirsten, your hostess and friend in this deprogramming adventure—where we’re reclaiming our minds from AA ideology and taking our power back.

In today’s episode, we dive into Sacred Science, the 5th sign in Dr. Robert Jay Lifton’s thought reform model. We explore how Alcoholics Anonymous frames its doctrine as absolute truth, discouraging questions, outside help, and critical thinking.

🚨 When the Big Book becomes the ultimate authority and obedience is confused with spirituality, you're no longer healing—you're being controlled.

💡 Topics we cover:

How the Big Book became untouchable dogma
The weaponization of “it works if you work it”
Why questioning AA is treated like heresy
The danger of sacred science in high-control groups
How to reclaim your autonomy and THINK for yourself

🧠 Recovery is a path—not a prison. Truth doesn’t fear questions. Let’s break the spell.

Want to deeper dive? Explore my online courses:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 45 Backlash From Telling The Truth About AA

Wed, 21 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

AA Comes for You — What Happened When I Told the Truth

I was in AA for 10 years. I left in 2020. But when I started talking publicly about it in 2025, everything changed.

This episode is about the backlash. The DMs. The control disguised as concern. The friends who got weird. And the culty energy that came pouring in when I finally spoke the truth.

If you’ve felt the pressure to stay silent… If you’ve felt the shame, the phobia indoctrination, or the gaslighting from people still inside…

You are not bananas.

You’re waking up.

And you’re not alone.

Want to recover from AA? Check out my deprogramming AA course:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 44 How AA Controls Your Mind - part 4 of 8: Cult of Confession

Tue, 20 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

In this episode, we dive into Lifton’s fourth marker of mind control: The Cult of Confession — and how AA uses this tactic to break you down and keep you dependent.

We explore how Alcoholics Anonymous normalizes emotional exposure to unqualified sponsors, reframes trauma as your fault, and builds a culture where silence is seen as dangerous, boundaries are seen as defects, and outside help is often discouraged — sometimes with tragic consequences.

🧠 Is this “spiritual progress,” or psychological control?

🎧 Let’s talk about confession culture, coercive sponsorship, and what it really means to reclaim your autonomy.

🧘🏼‍♀️ FREE RESOURCES to jumpstart your evolution 👇

📕 Self Love + Emotional Sobriety Book

🧘🏼‍♀️ GO DEEPER WITH ONLINE COURSES 👇

🚀 Rocket Your Recovery

💥 Big Dream Energy

💗 Live Your Truth

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 43 How AA Controls Your Mind - part 3 of 8: Demand for Purity

Mon, 19 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Welcome to Part 3 of our 8-part series: “8 Signs AA Is Controlling Your Mind” — today we’re diving into Demand for Purity 😇➡️🩸

In high-control groups, purity isn’t about health — it’s about obedience. In this episode, we'll dive into how AA creates an all-or-nothing mindset:

👉 Character defects = normal emotions labeled as flaws

👉 Self-policing and shame are spiritualized

👉 Outside help is discouraged

👉 Relapse = total failure, instead of a data point

…and how that pressure can sabotage your healing and keep you trapped in fear.

This 8 part Mind Control series is inspired by Dr. Robert Jay Lifton’s Thought Reform and the Psychology of Totalism, so we can unpack the hidden mind control tactics embedded in AA culture.

If you’ve ever felt guilt, shame, or like you weren’t “working your program hard enough,” this episode is for you.

🩷 It's safe to trust yourself 🩷

Dive deeper in your deprogramming journey with a self study course:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 42 AA's Harm Runs Deeper Than You Think

Sun, 18 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

AA is worse than I thought — 5 weeks of speaking out is changing everything.

I was in AA for 10 years — from 2009 to 2020. I left five years ago. But it wasn’t until I started talking about it publicly that I realized how deep the indoctrination really went.

Now that I’m five weeks into sharing my truth online, I’m seeing AA with new eyes — and honestly, it’s worse than I thought.

The control, the shame, the silencing… it’s all showing up again, only this time I’m on the outside of Alcoholics Anonymous.

🧘🏼‍♀️ GO DEEPER WITH ONLINE COURSES 👇

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 41 Ten Reasons Why AA Holds You Hostage

Sat, 17 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

— Here's 10 ways Alcoholics Anonymous benefits from keeping you trapped inside the rooms of AA.

Ever wonder why AA wants you to stay forever?

In this episode of the Sobriety Bestie Podcast, I’m breaking down 10 ways AA benefits from keeping you inside — from book sales to free labor to spiritual obedience disguised as “God’s will.”

This isn’t just a support group. It’s a system that uses fear, guilt, and control to hold onto you… even after you’ve outgrown it.

Want guidance with your deprogramming? Check out my deprogram AA course:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 40 How AA Controls Your Mind - part 2 of 8: Mystical Manipulation

Fri, 16 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Mystical Manipulation is when AA reframes your emotional responses, coincidences, or discomfort as “spiritual guidance” to keep you loyal to the program. It’s when sponsors are treated like prophets, emotional highs are assigned religious meaning, and everything—especially harm—is justified as “God’s will.”

I even share the most disturbing thing my sponsor ever said... and how weaponized spirituality made it possible.

This series is based on Lifton’s “Thought Reform and the Psychology of Totalism.” Today’s focus:

“You’re here for a reason” = mysticism as control

Sponsors speaking “for God”

Gratitude as a silencing tool

Emotional highs mistaken for divine truth

How AA uses “God’s will” to excuse harm

This is what it looks like when your agency is spiritually hijacked.

🩷 It's safe to trust yourself 🩷

Dive deeper in your deprogramming journey with a self study course:

🌀 Deprogram AA

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 39 How AA Controls Your Mind - part 1 of 8: Milieu Control

Thu, 15 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Welcome to a powerful 8-part mini-series based on Dr. Robert Jay Lifton’s Thought Reform and the Psychology of Totalism — originally used to study brainwashing in Maoist China, and disturbingly relevant to high-control groups like Alcoholics Anonymous.

In Part 1, we’re breaking down Milieu Control — how AA controls your physical environment, your relationships, your thinking, and even your identity.

We’ll explore:

AA's indoctrination through immersion

Sponsorship as moral authority

Suppression of voice, critical thinking, and autonomy

Groupthink, shame tactics

If you've ever felt emotionally manipulated, second-guessed your truth, or wondered why it was so hard to leave AA — this series is for you. There’s nothing wrong with you. You were just in a system designed to control.

🩷 It's safe to trust yourself 🩷

Dive deeper in your deprogramming journey with a self study course:

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 38 Why I'll Never Go To AA Again

Wed, 14 May 2025 08:45:00 -0700

I was an AA true believer. I cried on Bill W’s grave. I did AA across the world.

But once I saw the truth—it all fell apart.

In this episode of the Sobriety Bestie Podcast, I break down how AA hooked me with high-control tactics, outdated 1930's ideology, and identity-based manipulation… and why I’ll never go to AA again.

🔍 Topics we cover:

The sales tactics hidden inside the 12 steps
Why “real alcoholic” is loaded language that locks you in
The pushup disease in the parking lot myth 🙄
How AA keeps you stuck in a lifetime sentence
What I realized when I deprogrammed with modern science and truth

If you’re questioning the program, you’re not alone.

If you’re waking up, I see you.

If you’re ready to reclaim your mind—you’re in the right place.

Want to go deeper? Check out my online course:

🌀 Click here to check out Deprogram AA

You can listen to the full episode on Group Thinking Podcast here

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get free.

Ep 37 What's The Hardest Part of Leaving AA?

Tue, 13 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Let's open up about the reason leaving Alcoholics Anonymous is so hard. For me, it was probably the phobia indoctrination, the deeply ingrained belief that to leave is to die.

✨ But today is about you.

What’s been the hardest part for you about leaving AA?

Whether you’re freshly out or still untangling the mindset years later, this episode holds space for your truth—and invites you to share it.

📥 DM me on Instagram @sobrietybestie or comment on Sobriety Bestie YouTube. Your experience might inspire an episode or mini-series to better support you and others on this journey.

💡 In this episode:

The phobia that kept Kirsten stuck for 10 years
Why silence protects ideology—not people
What exit trauma really feels like
The freedom that unfolds on the other side of fear
Why speaking out leads to deeper deprogramming

You are not alone. And you are not powerless.

Let’s keep waking up, together. 💥

Ep 36 The Mindf*ck of Being Half In and Half Out of AA

Mon, 12 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

What if you're going to meetings, working with a sponsor, maybe even doing the steps… but deep down, you don’t believe it anymore?

Today’s episode is for you.

This is a living f*cking amends to anyone I ever indoctrinated into AA. I used to believe it all. I taught it all. And now I know better. If you're stuck in that weird in-between—half in, half out—you're not alone. And you're not crazy.

We’re talking about:

What it feels like to question AA while still in it
The emotional + mental toll of staying silent around your doubts
Why “alcoholism” isn’t a real diagnosis—and what is
Whether harm reduction inside AA is even possible
Tips from folks who deprogrammed while still attending meetings
Why your gut knows when it’s time to leave
A call to trust yourself, your brain, and your future

👉🏽 This episode is a permission slip. Not to do what I say—but to listen to yourself.

And if you’ve been silently struggling, I’d love to hear from you. Leave a comment on the YouTube version of this episode here or DM me—let’s start a better conversation about recovery, truth, and autonomy.

Because it’s not your job to conform.

It’s your right to get free.

🧘🏼‍♀️ FREE RESOURCES to jumpstart your evolution 👇

📍 Roadmap to Freedom Masterclass

📖 30 Signs You're Being Emotionally Manipulated guide

🧘🏼‍♀️ GO DEEPER WITH ONLINE COURSES 👇

💬 Let’s Connect: @SobrietyBestie

Ep 35 Finding A Good Therapist After AA

Fri, 09 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

When you're deprogramming from Alcoholics Anonymous or any high-control group, finding the right therapist can make all the difference.

In this episode of the Sobriety Bestie Podcast, I walk you through key questions to ask when choosing a therapist — based on advice from cult recovery expert Dr. Janja Lalich. This isn’t just about credentials. It’s about alignment, safety, and whether your therapist truly supports your freedom — not just your compliance.

Read the list of Q's on Dr. Janja Lalich's website here.

🩷 It's safe to trust yourself 🩷

🧘🏼‍♀️ GO DEEPER WITH ONLINE COURSES 👇

🚀 Rocket Your Recovery

💊 Digital Anxiety Pill

💥 Big Dream Energy

💗 Live Your Truth

🚘 Driving Anxiety

🧘🏼‍♀️ FREE RESOURCES to jumpstart your evolution 👇

📖 30 Signs You're Being Emotionally Manipulated guide

💬 Let’s Connect

@SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 34 Is Your Therapist Stunting Your Growth?

Thu, 08 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

If your therapist is in AA and reinforces the fear, they’re not holding space for your healing — they’re likely holding you hostage to an outdated ideology.

In this episode of the Sobriety Bestie Podcast, we’re diving into a hard truth:

You can’t deprogram from AA with a therapist who’s still inside the program.

Even if they claim to be open-minded or say they support other paths… if they're still in the rooms, they’re still operating from AA's limiting framework.

🩷 It's safe to trust yourself 🩷

Want to dive deeper? Check out my deprogramming AA course:

🌀 Deprogram Course

🧘🏼‍♀️ FREE RESOURCES to jumpstart your evolution 👇

📖 30 Signs You're Being Emotionally Manipulated guide

🧘🏼‍♀️ GO DEEPER WITH ONLINE COURSES 👇

😞 The 13th Step Documentary by Monica Richardson

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 33 The Craziest Thing My Sponsor Said - the 13th step

Wed, 07 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Today I’m telling the story of the most disturbing thing my AA sponsor ever said to me. It was about a known predator in our Alcoholics Anonymous meetings… and how she spiritualized it.

This is part of the deprogramming AA series and a crucial conversation about the 13th step—a term so common it has its own name, and that alone should raise alarms.

If you've ever felt unsafe, doubted your gut, or experienced sexual predation inside Alcoholics Anonymous—this one's for you.

You're not alone. It's safe to trust yourself.

Healing is possible. Freedom is available. And silence is not the solution.

Free resources + online courses mentioned:

📺 My TED talk on s*xual abuse + addiction

📕 Heartgasm Revolution Book – Emotional sobriety meets self love

🌀 Deprogram AA course – Reclaim your power + rebuild self-trust

🦁 L iberated in Sober Skin course – Build emotional freedom + rediscover your purpose

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 32 Thirty Signs You're Being Emotionally Manipulated

Tue, 06 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

In 30 signs you're being emotionally manipulated, we're diving in so you can recognize emotional manipulation in real time AND reclaim your power.

We’re diving into 30 emotional manipulation tactics—what they are, how they show up in everyday life, and how they’re often used inside Alcoholics Anonymous.

This episodes corresponding free guide and online course 👇

📖 30 Signs You're Being Emotionally Manipulated guide

🩷 It's safe to trust yourself 🩷

🧘🏼‍♀️ FREE RESOURCES to jumpstart your evolution 👇

🧘🏼‍♀️ GO DEEPER WITH ONLINE COURSES 👇

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 31 Does AA Become A New Addiction?

Mon, 05 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

You got sober—but did you get free?

In this episode of the Sobriety Bestie Podcast, we’re talking about something few people in recovery circles are willing to touch: the idea that Alcoholics Anonymous itself can become addictive. For some of us, the meetings, the steps, the fellowship… it all felt like self medicine. Or maybe it never did.

Does AA become another addiction? We'll dive into:

How AA can become a new form of dependency
Why the “daily reprieve” might actually be lifetime codependency
The emotional, biochemical, and psychological hits that kept us hooked
The trauma-informed lens on early sobriety and self-medication
What helped me break free—and what might help you, too

Whether you felt high on AA or just scared to leave, this conversation is for you. Let’s unpack the layers with honesty, compassion, and zero shame. Because leaving recovery shouldn’t feel like a relapse—and questioning the program doesn’t make you broken. It makes you courageous AF.

🩷 It's safe to trust yourself 🩷

🧘🏼‍♀️ FREE RESOURCES to jumpstart your evolution 👇

📍 Roadmap to Freedom Masterclass

🦁 Sober Confidence Mini Course

📕 Self Love + Emotional Sobriety Book

🧠 Neurodivergent Discovery Portal

📖 30 Signs You're Being Emotionally Manipulated guide

🧘🏼‍♀️ GO DEEPER WITH ONLINE COURSES 👇

🚀 Rocket Your Recovery

💊 Digital Anxiety Pill

💥 Big Dream Energy

💗 Live Your Truth

🚘 Driving Anxiety

💬 Let’s Connect

@SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 30 Alcoholics Anonymous Costs More Than You Think

Fri, 02 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Everyone says AA is free. But what if it’s not?

In this episode of the Sobriety Bestie Podcast, we break down the real costs of Alcoholics Anonymous—from the thousands of hours of unpaid emotional labor to the therapy bills many of us face after leaving. If you’ve ever paid to unfuck your mind from 12-step ideology, this is for you.

We’ll dive into:

The hidden emotional, psychological, and financial costs of long-term AA involvement
Why “free” often means unpaid labor and internalized guilt
How coercive control can feel like service when you believe it’s saving your life
The cost of deprogramming—and why it’s the best money you’ll ever spend
The truth about purpose, dopamine, and building a meaningful life outside of recovery

If you’ve spent years sponsoring, sharing, showing up, and being told your value was in how much you gave away—this episode will hit deep. It’s time to talk about what we gave, what we lost, and why leaving AA might be the most liberating decision we’ve ever made.

Check out the Deprogramming course 👇

🩷 It's safe to trust yourself 🩷

🧘🏼‍♀️ FREE RESOURCES to jumpstart your evolution 👇

🧘🏼‍♀️ GO DEEPER WITH ONLINE COURSES 👇

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 29 The Hidden Danger in AA's Disease Model

Thu, 01 May 2025 06:00:00 -0700

Today in our deprogram AA series we’re unpacking how the AA disease model doesn’t just offer support—it can program you into a state of learned helplessness.

What starts as help can turn into a trap: you’re told you’re powerless, broken, and forever in recovery. But what if that’s not true? What if the idea of having a “fatal, progressive disease” is a belief system—not a biological reality—and what if that belief is what’s keeping you stuck?

We explore:

The origins of AA’s disease concept (spoiler: Bill was a salesman)
How “powerlessness” becomes programming
The myth of the disease doing pushups in the parking lot
The emotional cost of being told recovery is forever
And how to unbrainwash yourself so you can finally move on, empowered

This episode is for anyone questioning the forever recovery model, wondering if they’ve already healed, and ready to reclaim their autonomy, agency, and actual freedom.

Check out the Deprogramming course 👇

🩷 It's safe to trust yourself 🩷

🧘🏼‍♀️ FREE RESOURCES to jumpstart your evolution 👇

🧘🏼‍♀️ GO DEEPER WITH ONLINE COURSES 👇

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 28 Identity Manipulation + Self Diagnosis in AA

Wed, 30 Apr 2025 06:00:00 -0700

What if you weren’t an “alcoholic” after all?

In this episode, we dive deep into two of AA’s most insidious high-control tactics:

🔹 Identity manipulation

🔹 Self-diagnosis under pressure

We unpack:

How AA gets you to adopt the “alcoholic” label when you’re at your most vulnerable
Why that label isn’t a medical diagnosis (and never has been)
The harm that comes from mistaking neurodivergence, trauma, or mental health struggles as “alcoholism”
How many folks only discovered their ADHD, autism, or bipolar II after leaving AA—and how life got so much better with real support
The difference between addiction recovery and discovering who you really are

If you’ve ever felt gaslit by AA’s one-size-fits-all “solution,” this episode is for you.

⚡ Ready to deprogram the dogma and reclaim your brain?

Check out the Deprogram course: A self-paced experience to help you untangle the mindf*ck, trust yourself again, and move forward with clarity and confidence.

🎓 Click here to explore the course →

You don’t need to spend your whole life fixing what was never broken.

Your wiring isn’t a defect.

You are not a walking diagnosis.

Let’s stop anchoring to our past—and start living our truth.

🩷 It's safe to trust yourself 🩷

🧘🏼‍♀️ FREE RESOURCES to jumpstart your evolution 👇

🧘🏼‍♀️ GO DEEPER WITH ONLINE COURSES 👇

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 27 Do you have to be "In Recovery" forever?

Tue, 29 Apr 2025 06:00:00 -0700

In today's Daily Dogma Detox series, we’re talking about a phase of sobriety that no one seems to mention — graduating from recovery. What if you don’t need to “recover” for the rest of your life? What if you’re actually done?

We'll reflect on what it means to leave AA, the silence around the exit, the courage it takes to trust your gut, and the power of reclaiming your own timeline. This episode is for the brave souls who know it's time to move on — and want permission to celebrate their liberation.

✨ We talk about:

– Why leaving AA is rarely acknowledged (and why that’s harmful)

– What it means to graduate from recovery

– Why critical thinking = freedom

– The importance of trusting your inner knowing

– Celebrating your sovereignty (book burning optional 😉)

🎉 Whether you left quietly or are just starting to question it all — this one’s for you. Let’s normalize the exit. Let’s make graduating from recovery something to be proud of.

Check out the Deprogramming course 👇

🩷 It's safe to trust yourself 🩷

🧘🏼‍♀️ FREE RESOURCES to jumpstart your evolution 👇

🧘🏼‍♀️ GO DEEPER WITH ONLINE COURSES 👇

🎓 Click here for the Deprogramming AA Course →

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 26 AA Brainwashes You To Fear Leaving

Mon, 28 Apr 2025 06:00:00 -0700

What happens when a recovery group uses fear to keep you from leaving?

In this episode, I unpack one of the most manipulative (and most normalized) control tactics inside AA:

phobia indoctrination—the messaging that to leave the group is to die.

We talk about:

How this tactic is baked into AA's structure and slogans
Why it feels so terrifying to leave—even if your intuition is screaming to go
A real-life story of receiving one of these subtle “death threat” messages in the middle of a manicure
Why this isn’t about bashing AA—but reclaiming your right to think, leave, and live

I also share how I worked through the phobia programming in therapy, and what finally helped me trust myself enough to walk away—and keep going.

👣 If you’re deprogramming and feeling the fear:

You're not alone—and you're not broken.

I created Deprogram for folks like us—people untangling from AA’s control and reclaiming their autonomy. It's a self study course (no sponsors, no meetings, no BS).

🩷 It's safe to trust yourself 🩷

🧘🏼‍♀️ FREE RESOURCES to jumpstart your evolution 👇

🧘🏼‍♀️ GO DEEPER WITH ONLINE COURSES 👇

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 25 Is Alcoholics Anonymous a Cult?

Sun, 27 Apr 2025 06:00:00 -0700

The question so many of us wonder... Is Alcoholics Anonymous a Cult?

We're pulling today's pod from Sobriety Bestie YouTube on.. is AA a cult. Listen in here or you can watch it on Sobriety Bestie Youtube.

Based on my 10 years inside AA, 5 years outside AA, and everything I’ve learned since speaking publicly — I’m unpacking it all.

Inside this episode:

✨ My first impressions of AA (hint: it wasn’t great)

✨ Love bombing, mind control, and "friends with conditions"

✨ Why informed consent matters in recovery

✨ How the real whiplash hit AFTER I left

✨ Why speaking out is met with cult-like behavior

✨ And how my mind is still evolving on this question today

This is about truth. freedom. critical thinking.

If you’ve ever wondered:

– "What the hell did I just go through?"

– "Why does leaving AA feel so intense?"

– "Am I crazy for questioning it?"

You are not alone.

There are thousands of us silently thriving after leaving AA.

It’s time to have the conversations that help us heal, evolve and move forward.

🔗 Links + Resources Mentioned:

Check out the Deprogramming course 👇

🩷 It's safe to trust yourself 🩷

🧘🏼‍♀️ FREE RESOURCES to jumpstart your evolution 👇

🧘🏼‍♀️ GO DEEPER WITH ONLINE COURSES 👇

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 24 AA Didn't Save My Life

Fri, 25 Apr 2025 06:00:00 -0700

In this raw and honest episode, I dive deep into one of the most common mantras in recovery spaces: “AA saved my life.”

But what if it didn’t?

What if you saved your own life?

This is a powerful conversation for anyone walking through the fog of deprogramming—especially if you’ve ever felt like AA took credit for your transformation while gaslighting your intuition. I’m unpacking the cultural conditioning that equates obedience with salvation, and why reclaiming your autonomy is such a big damn deal.

If you’ve ever whispered “I can’t do this anymore” and found the courage to choose life—this one’s for you.

🔗 Links & Resources

Check out the Deprogramming course 👇

🩷 It's safe to trust yourself 🩷

🧘🏼‍♀️ FREE RESOURCES to jumpstart your evolution 👇

🧘🏼‍♀️ GO DEEPER WITH ONLINE COURSES 👇

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 23 Breaking Free From AA's Manipulation

Thu, 24 Apr 2025 06:00:00 -0700

When I left AA, I didn’t just walk away from meetings—I dove straight into studying emotional manipulation.

Because I felt humiliated.

Embarrassed.

Played.

Like how did I believe all the nonsense FULLY and for so long. So I wanted to understand what the hell had happened—and how to never fall for it again.

In this episode, I’m sharing:

The simple tactic I use in real time to break free from manipulation
3 high-control manipulation tactics you’ll often see in AA
How recognizing these patterns can help you reclaim your agency and self-trust

If you’ve ever questioned your experience inside AA…

If you’ve ever felt guilt-tripped, silenced, or confused by the way people acted when you tried to leave… If you’re still unpacking the internal programming...

This is for you.

🧠 Want help deprogramming the AA mindf*ckery?

Deprogram is an on demand course to help you deprogram AA’s fear-based messaging and reclaim your mind, your power, and your life.

🩷 It's safe to trust yourself 🩷

🧘🏼‍♀️ FREE RESOURCES to jumpstart your evolution 👇

🧘🏼‍♀️ GO DEEPER WITH ONLINE COURSES 👇

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 22 How AA Sponsors Block Us From Understanding Ourselves

Wed, 23 Apr 2025 06:00:00 -0700

AA told me I had “alcoholic thinking," and "untreated alcoholism" amongst other terms Bill made up.

But it turns out… I’m autistic. And ADHD.

Not broken, not diseased, not spiritually bankrupt—just wired differently.

In today’s Daily Dogma Detox episode, I’m unpacking how Alcoholics Anonymous blocked me from discovering who I really am. I was misdiagnosed inside the rooms—told that my neurodivergent traits were “character defects,” my sensory overwhelm was “untreated alcoholism,” and my entire internal world was a spiritual sickness.

But it wasn’t.

Inside the AA framework, I couldn’t see clearly.

Outside of it, I could finally meet myself.

We talk about:

Why AA’s language and ideology delay accurate diagnoses
How autism and ADHD often get mislabeled as “alcoholism”
What it feels like to pray away your traits (and fail)
The difference between self-medication and addiction
And how modern tools can actually help us thrive

If you’ve ever wondered whether there’s more to your story than “alcoholism”… there probably is. And it’s safe to get curious.

🧠 Need support after leaving AA?

Check out my course: Deprogram

It’s not a group. It’s not a meeting. It’s a powerful self-guided experience to help you deprogram, reclaim your identity, and move forward—on your own terms.

Check out the Deprogramming course 👇

🩷 It's safe to trust yourself 🩷

🧘🏼‍♀️ FREE RESOURCES to jumpstart your evolution 👇

🧘🏼‍♀️ GO DEEPER WITH ONLINE COURSES 👇

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 21 Why AA Pushes Back When You Walk Away

Tue, 22 Apr 2025 05:45:00 -0700

Why does AA react so intense when you leave? We're diving into it in another Daily Dogma Detox special episode.

In today’s episode, I’m breaking down the real reason why AA members push back so hard when someone chooses to leave—and thrive. When your exit doesn’t fit their narrative, it becomes a threat to their identity. The system can’t acknowledge your freedom, so it labels you as wrong, dangerous, or “not a real alcoholic.”

We’re talking about:

Ideological possession (yes, it’s a real thing)
Closed systems and why your truth threatens the whole structure
Why speaking out feels scary—and why that fear was planted there
Programming that tells you not to trust your own thinking
And how to reclaim your voice, your autonomy, and your damn self

If you’ve left AA (or are thinking about it), this episode is here to remind you that your intuition is your compass. Not Bill’s ideas. Not groupthink. You.

🧠 Ready to deprogram from AA?

Check out my self-paced, on-demand course: Deprogram.

It’s not a meeting, not a group—just a straight-up roadmap to help you reclaim your mind, your voice, and your power.👇

🩷 It's safe to trust yourself 🩷

🧘🏼‍♀️ FREE RESOURCES to jumpstart your evolution 👇

🧘🏼‍♀️ GO DEEPER WITH ONLINE COURSES 👇

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 20 Sharing About Leaving AA Was Shocking

Mon, 21 Apr 2025 06:00:00 -0700

What happens when you finally speak your truth about leaving Alcoholics Anonymous?

In this episode, I’m diving into the shock of sharing publicly about my exit from Alcoholics Anonymous—and the unexpected emotional and psychological waves that followed. From subtle manipulation to ideological possession, we’re naming what happens when you walk away from a high-control group… and dare to say so out loud.

I’m not here to bash. I’m here to break free.

And if you’re on that path too—this one’s for you.

We talk about:

The after-recovery void (what no one warns you about)
Exit trauma and the psychology of leaving a belief system
High-control tactics (even from “well-meaning” people)
Why reclaiming your intuition is everything
And how freedom becomes the north star after programming

If you’re navigating the weird, messy, courageous process of leaving AA—or trying to rebuild your trust in yourself—know this: you’re not alone. There’s life (and deep liberation) on the other side.

🧠 Want help deprogramming the AA mindf*ckery?

Check out my on-demand course, Deprogram .

No groups. No sponsors. Just you, reclaiming your voice and your power.👇

🩷 It's safe to trust yourself 🩷

🧘🏼‍♀️ FREE RESOURCES to jumpstart your evolution 👇

🧘🏼‍♀️ GO DEEPER WITH ONLINE COURSES 👇

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 19 AA Misdiagnosed Me As Alcoholic

Sun, 20 Apr 2025 06:45:00 -0700

What if you were never actually an alcoholic… but neurodivergent all along?

Or maybe you have another diagnosis that explains everything like Type 2 Bipolar or depression or...

In this episode, I share how Alcoholics Anonymous misdiagnosed me—and how I came to discover I’m autistic and ADHD after I left the rooms. We unpack the pressure to conform inside AA, the common misdiagnosis, especially with women in recovery, and what it really feels like to finally see yourself clearly after years of confusion and self-doubt.

If you’ve ever felt like something deeper was going on beneath your drinking—or if you’re in recovery and suspect you might be neurodivergent—this episode is for you.

Timestamps:

00:00 – AA Misdiagnosed Me As Alcoholic

04:30 – Why ADHD and Autism Get Missed in Recovery

10:58 – Misdiagnosis in AA Is Very Common

18:57 – Leaving AA Can Feel Like Withdrawal

26:08 – Finding Out I'm Neurodivergent After Leaving AA

31:10 – Can You Self-Diagnose as Neurodivergent?

Resources mentioned 👇

🧠 Neurodivergent Discovery Portal

🩷 It's safe to trust yourself 🩷

🧘🏼‍♀️ FREE RESOURCES to jumpstart your evolution 👇

🧘🏼‍♀️ GO DEEPER WITH ONLINE COURSES 👇

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

Ep 18 Telling The Internet I Left AA

Sun, 13 Apr 2025 03:30:00 -0700

📝 SHOW NOTES: Five days ago, I told the internet that I left Alcoholics Anonymous—after 10 years in, and 5 years out. I finally said it out loud.

And everything exploded.

In this episode, I’m giving you the real, raw, behind-the-scenes of what happened next. From the relief I felt, to the backlash I received, to the massive outpouring of support that showed me just how many people are silently struggling in the shadows of leaving recovery.

If you’re questioning recovery, quietly outgrowing AA, or just curious what it’s like to come out of the leaving AA closet—this is for you.

We talk about:

The emotional aftermath of hitting publish
The freedom that came from finally telling the truth
The reaction I got (the good, the bad, and the trolling)
Why this message is especially for autistic & neurodivergent women
Exit trauma, self-trust, and choosing truth over fear
What happens when we stop hiding and show up authentic

🎧 Listen now, and if it resonates, share it with someone silently suffering. Let's make this conversation not-so-silent anymore.

🔗 Mentioned in this episode:

→ Why I Left AA After 10 Years

→ Deprogram AA Course

→ My TED Talk

→ Personal Facebook (come say hi)

💬 Let’s talk:

Are you in, out, or somewhere in-between? Send me a DM, I’d love to hear your story.

Ep 17 Why I left AA after 10 years

Mon, 07 Apr 2025 12:15:00 -0700

🎧 Episode Summary:

In this raw, unfiltered, and deeply personal episode, I finally break my silence and my anonymity around Alcoholics Anonymous. After 10 years as a devoted, true-believer AA member and 5 years since leaving the program, I'm opening up about why I left — and what happened next.

This is the story of what it means to evolve beyond recovery. It’s not an AA bash-fest. It’s a soul-truth telling, and my intention is to liberate anyone who’s been quietly wrestling with doubts, dissonance, and the terrifying question: What if I leave... and I die?

I share:

The moment I realized I was in a high-control ideology
How critical thinking cracked open my AA worldview
The painful (and freeing) process of deprogramming
Why I now believe recovery can become learned helplessness
How I discovered I was autistic and ADHD after leaving AA
What recovery actually means to me now
The surprising grief, fear, and freedom that comes from walking away

If you've ever felt trapped in a program that once saved you, or you’ve questioned whether staying is still serving your evolution — this episode is for you.

I share this not to convince, but to validate, to liberate, and to remind you: You're allowed to grow beyond where you started.

🌀 If You’re in the Deprogramming Phase…

I created a course called Deprogram, specifically for folks leaving AA and navigating the messy, liberating, identity-shifting work of reclaiming their own mind.

It’s a roadmap I wish existed when I left Alcoholics Anonymous.

🩷 It's safe to trust yourself 🩷

🧘🏼‍♀️ FREE RESOURCES to jumpstart your evolution 👇

🧘🏼‍♀️ GO DEEPER WITH ONLINE COURSES 👇