Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’ve struggled for a month, since I read Dawn Kohler’s book, The Messages, to figure out how to introduce this woman, what direction to take our discussion, and how to adequately portray the events that took place in her life….I’ve come up with nothing that seems to fully do the job so I’m just going to say “wow” and jump right in. 

In her 30’s Dawn’s body simply would not let her get out of her car as she pulled into her thriving, award-winning computer company, for another day as CEO in a job she loved. She couldn’t get her hand to open the door. After sitting for hours she finally drove home and started on one of the most interesting and spiritual journey’s I’ve ever read about. She says, “by sheer self-mutiny, the self I was born to be decided to hijack the one I had created.”

Tune into the audio for Dawn Kohler’s story and the amazing things we are going to learn from it.

Dawn Kohler was an award-winning entrepreneur in the computer industry when she was abruptly summoned to take a life-altering course. What followed was an extraordinary healing journey from childhood abuse and rape. This journey took a giant toll on her, on her family, and on her marriage, but it gave her profound insights, incredible healing, and deep understanding. Combining these insights, and her business experience, Dawn became a sought-after Executive Coach helping leaders understand and enhance their impact on others and their contribution to the world. Her clients have included many of the most influential women in entertainment, as well as senior leaders at Sony Pictures, NBC Universal, Lionsgate, DreamWorks, Fox, Snapchat, Disney, and Amazon. 

Dawn is the author of 3 books including her recent memoir, The Messages, a prophetic journey.

Tune into my talk with Dawn. Here are just some of the things we talk about:

1. While your book, The Messages, is the whole detailed story, will you please tell the listeners your story, and then we’ll move into where that brought you?
2. In your recent memoir, you share the story of how you came to receive a series of what you experienced as divine messages. What were the messages? How will they impact us? And why do you think they came to you, a secular businesswoman? 
3. In your book you share a conversation with your therapist where she said, “You followed your messages, faced your fears, encountered great upheavals, and released a lifetime of stored emotions that, honestly, I’m surprised have not killed you by now., It’s the hero’s journey. you want through the crucible in order to come out the other side and bring back a treasure to the kingdom.”
4. The onset of your personal journey was marked by high anxiety and depression. We are certainly seeing an increase in both in our culture, do you think those symptoms are a kind of summons or awakening for all of us? 
5. How do we answer the call to a greater life? Why are some called and some aren’t?
6. In your book you say, “People need to understand how important it is to take responsibility for their own healing. We can avoid so much suffering if we embrace who we really are and learn to love more deeply.” How do we do this?
7. You also said, “Our spirit is always trying to heal us, deepen our capacity to love, and guide us to where we can best serve. We just have to listen and follow our own path.” I want to talk about “our own path.” Your experience is incredible, but very different from my understanding of how the universe works. My sons are on paths that I can’t fully understand. This idea of our “own path” is really opening me up to allowance, but how do we support each other when our understanding and belief in a certain path differs from how someone else, especially people...]]>Episode: 238 - The Messages: A Story of Navigating Life Transitions and Embracing Change

   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’ve struggled for a month, since I read Dawn Kohler’s book, The Messages, to figure out how to introduce this woman, what direction to take our discussion, and how to adequately portray the events that took place in her life….I’ve come up with nothing that seems to fully do the job so I’m just going to say “wow” and jump right in. 

   In her 30’s Dawn’s body simply would not let her get out of her car as she pulled into her thriving, award-winning computer company, for another day as CEO in a job she loved. She couldn’t get her hand to open the door. After sitting for hours she finally drove home and started on one of the most interesting and spiritual journey’s I’ve ever read about. She says, “by sheer self-mutiny, the self I was born to be decided to hijack the one I had created.”

   Tune into the audio for Dawn Kohler’s story and the amazing things we are going to learn from it.

   Dawn Kohler was an award-winning entrepreneur in the computer industry when she was abruptly summoned to take a life-altering course. What followed was an extraordinary healing journey from childhood abuse and rape. This journey took a giant toll on her, on her family, and on her marriage, but it gave her profound insights, incredible healing, and deep understanding. Combining these insights, and her business experience, Dawn became a sought-after Executive Coach helping leaders understand and enhance their impact on others and their contribution to the world. Her clients have included many of the most influential women in entertainment, as well as senior leaders at Sony Pictures, NBC Universal, Lionsgate, DreamWorks, Fox, Snapchat, Disney, and Amazon. 

   Dawn is the author of 3 books including her recent memoir, The Messages, a prophetic journey.

   Tune into my talk with Dawn. Here are just some of the things we talk about:

   1. While your book, The Messages, is the whole detailed story, will you please tell the listeners your story, and then we’ll move into where that brought you?
   2. In your recent memoir, you share the story of how you came to receive a series of what you experienced as divine messages. What were the messages? How will they impact us? And why do you think they came to you, a secular businesswoman? 
   3. In your book you share a conversation with your therapist where she said, “You followed your messages, faced your fears, encountered great upheavals, and released a lifetime of stored emotions that, honestly, I’m surprised have not killed you by now., It’s the hero’s journey. you want through the crucible in order to come out the other side and bring back a treasure to the kingdom.”
   4. The onset of your personal journey was marked by high anxiety and depression. We are certainly seeing an increase in both in our culture, do you think those symptoms are a kind of summons or awakening for all of us? 
   5. How do we answer the call to a greater life? Why are some called and some aren’t?
   6. In your book you say, “People need to understand how important it is to take responsibility for their own healing. We can avoid so much suffering if we embrace who we really are and learn to love more deeply.” How do we do this?
   7. You also said, “Our spirit is always trying to heal us, deepen our capacity to love, and guide us to where we can best serve. We just have to listen and follow our own path.” I want to talk about “our own path.” Your experience is incredible, but very different from my understanding of how the universe works. My sons are on paths that I can’t fully understand. This idea of our “own path” is really opening me up to allowance, but how do we support each other when our understanding and belief in a certain path differs from how someone else, especially people we love, are unfolding?
   
   

   CONTACT DAWN OR BUY HER BOOK:

   • For more information about our guest today Dawn Kohler, or to sign up for one of Dawn’s upcoming workshop, please go to www.DawnKohler.com
   • To purchase, or read a sample of Dawn’s new book- The Messages, you can find it here on Amazon 
   • To follow dawn on Facebook please go to https://www.facebook.com/dawnkohlerauthor
   
   

   Here’s a thought…what are you doing in your life to move toward love, to move toward healing? Consider that question this week. I believe, when we all do our little parts, the difference it makes for the whole is monumental, for the whole is all of the parts. 

   Consider what needs healing in you, and how you can move toward bringing more love into the world, and then take steps to do just that. That IS our best life….

   Thanks for leaving a review - I want to share one that was left be a listener: 

   Loving this podcast!!!

   December 5, 2021

   I’ve only listened to two episodes and I’m already feeling how much this podcast is positively improving my life. I’m so glad this podcast exists and can’t wait to listen to all of the episodes and reflect on my life and work towards loving my story

   by rweisz8 from United States

   ]]>06a2137b-3c58-4596-8ff5-ee10a31fac42Wed, 08 Feb 2023 06:00:00 -070038:19falsefull238238Lori LeeEpisode 237: Bang Head Here: Interview with Josh Brazier & Hollie Henderson - Part 2Episode 237: Bang Head Here: Interview with Josh Brazier & Hollie Henderson - Part 2

   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today is Part 2 of Bang Head Here. We’re back with Hollie and Josh, the authors of Bang Head Here, and today we are talking shop. In Part 1 we got their stories, of Hollie’s troubled youth and how it put her on this incredible path, so go back and listen to part 1 to get her full story. 

   And we got Josh’s story of being a young man in Morocco and working with refugees from West Africa, watching their abuse and deportment that became so formative for him as he built a life of humanitarian work.

   Today we want to move on with our conversation with them so we can glean insight from their wisdom.

   Hollie and Josh, welcome back to the show.

   Let’s dive right back into our conversation and pick up where we left off…..Last episode we finished up with the challenges teens are having with connection, this episodes let’s go to the next obvious question:

   Tune into our conversation about:

   1. What keeps parents from connecting with their teens and young adult children?

   2. Why are you able to connect with teens when the parents cannot?

   3. Let’s talk about developing resilience. In your book you talk about the need of accepting that pain is a part of life. You say, “We realized that we didn’t really know what it meant to look at pain without trying to avoid it. In essence we didn’t know how to be ok with not feeling ok.” Let’s talk about this idea of acceptance of all the emotions of living, but then let’s talk about how this is a part of becoming resilient. 

   4. How do we fill our resiliency tanks? How do we lay a foundation of resiliency?

   5. Why do young people listen and how do you keep their attention? “In your book you gave some great advice - “Make sure what you say today is living and void of judgement.” “If you can make them feel loved and valued at least once a day, you’ll have a great start.”

   6. How do we deal with and avoid pain? What are healthy ways of dealing with pain?

   How to contact Hollie and Josh:

   WEBSITE: https://www.joshandhollie.com/

   EMAIL: info@joshandhollie.com

   FACEBOOK: @joshandholliecoaching

   INSTAGRAM: @josh_and_hollie

   TWITTER: @JoshHollie2

   I’ve spent a lot of time lately thinking about how hard communication is for everyone. When you think about it, we all have different experiences, different triggers, different insecurities, different stories about everything. And with those stories that we are telling ourselves in our own heads, we are creating different realities. In Bang Head Here, Josh and Hollie say, “We know very little about what’s going on her to really know what’s going on. It’s a reminder that we need to keep our initial opinions and perceptions out of the equation until we have had enough time to be curious, ask questions and create different perspectives and possibilities, and to give the benefit of the doubt.”

   Your challenge this week is to give someone the benefit of the doubt. When you are hit with frustration or fear in one of your relationships, give them the benefit of the doubt and approach them with that in mind.

   So many teens right now seem to struggle so deeply. Suicide rates are so high. Social media doesn’t help. We’re dealing with the first generation being raised on the internet, hitting our heads against that proverbial wall, and finding our way around outcomes we’ve not had to deal with before. Bang Head Here may be a great resource for you. 

   We’ll see you in two weeks.

   ]]>Episode 237: Bang Head Here: Interview with Josh Brazier & Hollie Henderson - Part 2

   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today is Part 2 of Bang Head Here. We’re back with Hollie and Josh, the authors of Bang Head Here, and today we are talking shop. In Part 1 we got their stories, of Hollie’s troubled youth and how it put her on this incredible path, so go back and listen to part 1 to get her full story. 

   And we got Josh’s story of being a young man in Morocco and working with refugees from West Africa, watching their abuse and deportment that became so formative for him as he built a life of humanitarian work.

   Today we want to move on with our conversation with them so we can glean insight from their wisdom.

   Hollie and Josh, welcome back to the show.

   Let’s dive right back into our conversation and pick up where we left off…..Last episode we finished up with the challenges teens are having with connection, this episodes let’s go to the next obvious question:

   Tune into our conversation about:

   1. What keeps parents from connecting with their teens and young adult children?

   2. Why are you able to connect with teens when the parents cannot?

   3. Let’s talk about developing resilience. In your book you talk about the need of accepting that pain is a part of life. You say, “We realized that we didn’t really know what it meant to look at pain without trying to avoid it. In essence we didn’t know how to be ok with not feeling ok.” Let’s talk about this idea of acceptance of all the emotions of living, but then let’s talk about how this is a part of becoming resilient. 

   4. How do we fill our resiliency tanks? How do we lay a foundation of resiliency?

   5. Why do young people listen and how do you keep their attention? “In your book you gave some great advice - “Make sure what you say today is living and void of judgement.” “If you can make them feel loved and valued at least once a day, you’ll have a great start.”

   6. How do we deal with and avoid pain? What are healthy ways of dealing with pain?

   How to contact Hollie and Josh:

   WEBSITE: https://www.joshandhollie.com/

   EMAIL: info@joshandhollie.com

   FACEBOOK: @joshandholliecoaching

   INSTAGRAM: @josh_and_hollie

   TWITTER: @JoshHollie2

   I’ve spent a lot of time lately thinking about how hard communication is for everyone. When you think about it, we all have different experiences, different triggers, different insecurities, different stories about everything. And with those stories that we are telling ourselves in our own heads, we are creating different realities. In Bang Head Here, Josh and Hollie say, “We know very little about what’s going on her to really know what’s going on. It’s a reminder that we need to keep our initial opinions and perceptions out of the equation until we have had enough time to be curious, ask questions and create different perspectives and possibilities, and to give the benefit of the doubt.”

   Your challenge this week is to give someone the benefit of the doubt. When you are hit with frustration or fear in one of your relationships, give them the benefit of the doubt and approach them with that in mind.

   So many teens right now seem to struggle so deeply. Suicide rates are so high. Social media doesn’t help. We’re dealing with the first generation being raised on the internet, hitting our heads against that proverbial wall, and finding our way around outcomes we’ve not had to deal with before. Bang Head Here may be a great resource for you. 

   We’ll see you in two weeks.

   ]]>a1da3b55-15ab-4588-b48b-7e57cf594bf6Wed, 25 Jan 2023 06:00:00 -070030:07falsefull237237Lori LeeEpisode 236: Bang Head Here - Interview with Josh Brazier & Hollie HendersonEpisode 236: Bang Head Here - Interview with Josh Brazier & Hollie Henderson - Part 1

   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast.

   What do you get when you bring together a woman who was an at-risk teen, with severe troubles in her family of origin, and a man who on his LDS mission to Morroco worked with thousands of African refugees who were abused by guards and eventually deported, despite all their struggles, to make a better life? What you get is a dynamic duo who have partnered together, after years of their own experience in social work - like violence prevention and humanitarian programs, to help families and troubled youth learn to communicate and solve pain points.

   You also get a new book called: Bang Head Here. 

   Tune in because we are going to get into their stories, as well as the tremendous work they are doing and you’ll definitely learn some things about communicating with your loved ones.

   Today’s podcast is about a number of things. It’s about how to communicate in families, especially with at-risk youth. It’s about how to recognize the part we play, as parents and caregivers, in the miscommunications that occur. It’s about sharing the life experiences of two people who have taken some traumatic experiences and turned them into skills to share and help families communicate better. It’s ultimately about using what they know to help others along the path of building better life stories.

   We have a couple “guides” with us today. Let me introduce them:

   First, Hollie:

   Hollie has been training teens and adults for over twenty years. Her training work began in the field of violence prevention and dating violence prevention. Hollie has trained thousands of teens and young adults to recognize the warning signs that lead to violent and deadly relationships.

   She is an active parent & teen coach who specializes in working with at-risk teens and young adults and their parents. She understands the struggle and nuances of these relationships primarily because she once was an "at-risk teen" who has found a way to reconnection within a family structure that once was failing.

   Josh:

   With over 15 years of experience working with youth and family in over a dozen countries, Josh brings a very unique perspective to healing and family culture. Having worked alongside thousands of young people and having been inside hundreds of struggling households, Josh's experience has led to deep and powerful insights that help create a new path of healing. 

   Having worked for the past decade creating social programs for youth in the US and abroad, Josh brings his 15 years of experience working with youth to help solve real pain points the youth are facing.

   Tune in to the audio program to hear about his story serving in Morocco on an LDS mission. In a Spanish provence there was a refugee camp where thousands of West Africans were coming up to create a better life in Europe. He was tasked with building a church and helping the refugees - creating an English speaking branch. He worked with these people building good spaces for them. The refugees had to deal with very difficult psychological issues, abuse from the guards physically, verbally, sexually abused - rape was an issue. The overcrowding was severe. In addition the refugees had the horrible struggles in their travels to actually get to where they were - friends being eaten by wild animals, drinking their own urine to survive on the trail, women having to sell their bodies. He grew very close to these people as he walked with them on this path. One day he got on his boat to go to mainland Spain with his branch, when they were all apprehended by local authorities and his entire branch was deported to their countries of origin. He never saw them again and the trauma of the event caused a great deal of personal struggle. He started his program to honor these people. It became]]>Episode 236: Bang Head Here - Interview with Josh Brazier & Hollie Henderson - Part 1

   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast.

   What do you get when you bring together a woman who was an at-risk teen, with severe troubles in her family of origin, and a man who on his LDS mission to Morroco worked with thousands of African refugees who were abused by guards and eventually deported, despite all their struggles, to make a better life? What you get is a dynamic duo who have partnered together, after years of their own experience in social work - like violence prevention and humanitarian programs, to help families and troubled youth learn to communicate and solve pain points.

   You also get a new book called: Bang Head Here. 

   Tune in because we are going to get into their stories, as well as the tremendous work they are doing and you’ll definitely learn some things about communicating with your loved ones.

   Today’s podcast is about a number of things. It’s about how to communicate in families, especially with at-risk youth. It’s about how to recognize the part we play, as parents and caregivers, in the miscommunications that occur. It’s about sharing the life experiences of two people who have taken some traumatic experiences and turned them into skills to share and help families communicate better. It’s ultimately about using what they know to help others along the path of building better life stories.

   We have a couple “guides” with us today. Let me introduce them:

   First, Hollie:

   Hollie has been training teens and adults for over twenty years. Her training work began in the field of violence prevention and dating violence prevention. Hollie has trained thousands of teens and young adults to recognize the warning signs that lead to violent and deadly relationships.

   She is an active parent & teen coach who specializes in working with at-risk teens and young adults and their parents. She understands the struggle and nuances of these relationships primarily because she once was an "at-risk teen" who has found a way to reconnection within a family structure that once was failing.

   Josh:

   With over 15 years of experience working with youth and family in over a dozen countries, Josh brings a very unique perspective to healing and family culture. Having worked alongside thousands of young people and having been inside hundreds of struggling households, Josh's experience has led to deep and powerful insights that help create a new path of healing. 

   Having worked for the past decade creating social programs for youth in the US and abroad, Josh brings his 15 years of experience working with youth to help solve real pain points the youth are facing.

   Tune in to the audio program to hear about his story serving in Morocco on an LDS mission. In a Spanish provence there was a refugee camp where thousands of West Africans were coming up to create a better life in Europe. He was tasked with building a church and helping the refugees - creating an English speaking branch. He worked with these people building good spaces for them. The refugees had to deal with very difficult psychological issues, abuse from the guards physically, verbally, sexually abused - rape was an issue. The overcrowding was severe. In addition the refugees had the horrible struggles in their travels to actually get to where they were - friends being eaten by wild animals, drinking their own urine to survive on the trail, women having to sell their bodies. He grew very close to these people as he walked with them on this path. One day he got on his boat to go to mainland Spain with his branch, when they were all apprehended by local authorities and his entire branch was deported to their countries of origin. He never saw them again and the trauma of the event caused a great deal of personal struggle. He started his program to honor these people. It became a very meaningful and formative time in his life.

   This is the first of a 2-part series highlighting the work you to do, as well as your own personal stories. With two of you, who have very interesting personal stories as well as lots of wisdom to impart to us, we’re going to give this two full episodes.

   Let’s start with Josh’s story -

   Tune to hear Josh and Hollie's person stories and then we get down to talking shop:

   We talk about:

   What trends are you seeing that are causing so much disconnection in families? 

   What are the biggest challenges teens face when it comes to connection?

   In your book you say, “Your connection with your loved one is incredibly vital to their emotional stability and their healing process.” I loved this point because sometimes in my own family I wonder if I just need to get out of the way, but it was a reminder that I need to do what I can to make a good connection, because that’s going to help them in their process of growth and healing. In fact, further on in the book you said that we should be asking the question: “What can I do to build a stronger relationship with my loved one so that when she starts to struggle, I am connected enough to help her solve her conflict.”

   Part 1 ends here, but in two weeks tune in for the rest of the story. For the answers to more burning questions about communication and connection between teens and parents as they work to write their best life story with the people they love. Share this with someone who needs to hear it.

   To order Bang Head Here or to contact Hollie and Josh:

   Website: https://www.joshandhollie.com/

   Email: info@joshandhollie.com

   Facebook: @joshandholliecoaching

   Instagram: @josh_and_hollie

   Twitter: @JoshHollie2

   We’ll see you in two weeks for Part II.

   ]]>90f2ee15-7be5-42b2-b018-577b79867dfcWed, 11 Jan 2023 06:00:00 -070041:52falsefull236236Lori LeeEpisode 235: Best of 2022Episode 235: Best of 2022

   Welcome to the LYS Podcast. Today’s episode is one of my favorites of the year because it celebrates what you, the listeners, enjoyed most over the past year. I love looking at the top 5 episodes because it tells me about our past year, what resonated with everyone - which episodes lifted your spirits, connected with you, gave you what you wanted to create your best life story.

   But I also love this episode because it’s a fun listen - you get to hear little teasers of the favorite shows, and decide which ones you may want to go back and listen to or share.

   Click the link to find out the top 5 listener-favorites for the year.

   So let’s get started with the top 5 episodes of 2022.

   Coming in at #5 is Episode 214 - Walking on Water. In this episode we discuss the deep importance of us of learning to walk with faith, of coming to understand what it is, why it’s important, and how to develop and use it in our own lives. I share clips from 3 excellent women who are expert on the topic and we talk about how we have to have more faith in our why, in ourselves, and in our supportive universal purpose and God, than we have in fear. 

   In this clip I have just grabbed a little piece from the first of these women. Take a listen.

   #4

   Having the faith to take action in your life is a HUGE step to making things happen, but one of the next most powerful steps in creating a peaceful life is the ability to see how our trials help us to grow - to be able to recognize that the shit of life is the fertilizer….

   I’ll add in this little thought as well. I was reading a symposium paper on why bad things happen, and there was a wonderful section that talked about how we CANNOT learn to forgive without being hurt and having someone to forgive. We cannot learn patience without having to struggle with the shortage of time, we can’t gain understanding and empathy without knowing a particular pain - someone who has struggled with illness can understand another who struggles with this also. etc.. While our desire to avoid pain is strong, growth, understanding and the development of Christ-like qualities comes only through knowing the opposite side of it. 

   Which takes us to #4 - Episode 227, my interview with Carrington Smith, the author of Blooming: Finding Gifts in the Shit of Life

   Here’s a clip from listener favorite #4: (Tune into the audio program)

   You can find the whole episode that includes her numerous personal stories of rape and abuse and how she comes to claim her story. Episode 227.

   #3

   Now, What is #3 for 2022? The 3rd most downloaded episode is: Episode 218 - Life Engineered with Rusty Lindquist. 

   I’m loving this countdown, because each of the top downloads, as it turns out, are all super life tools.

   #5 - Having the faith to step out and take action

   #4 - Understanding that our trials and failures are really our greatest tools for building our character and refining us.

   And now, in #3 - Creating our life with intention - Engineering the life you want on purpose

   Tune into the audio program to hear a clip from my interview with Rusty Lindquist.

   To listen to the entire episode, pull up episode 218 on your app or on loveyourstorypodcast.com 

   #2

   Now we are to #2 - The second most downloaded episode this year was:

   Episode 212: Domestic Violence: Interview Brielle Cotterman and Melissa Haenchen

   Brielle...]]>Episode 235: Best of 2022

   Welcome to the LYS Podcast. Today’s episode is one of my favorites of the year because it celebrates what you, the listeners, enjoyed most over the past year. I love looking at the top 5 episodes because it tells me about our past year, what resonated with everyone - which episodes lifted your spirits, connected with you, gave you what you wanted to create your best life story.

   But I also love this episode because it’s a fun listen - you get to hear little teasers of the favorite shows, and decide which ones you may want to go back and listen to or share.

   Click the link to find out the top 5 listener-favorites for the year.

   So let’s get started with the top 5 episodes of 2022.

   Coming in at #5 is Episode 214 - Walking on Water. In this episode we discuss the deep importance of us of learning to walk with faith, of coming to understand what it is, why it’s important, and how to develop and use it in our own lives. I share clips from 3 excellent women who are expert on the topic and we talk about how we have to have more faith in our why, in ourselves, and in our supportive universal purpose and God, than we have in fear. 

   In this clip I have just grabbed a little piece from the first of these women. Take a listen.

   #4

   Having the faith to take action in your life is a HUGE step to making things happen, but one of the next most powerful steps in creating a peaceful life is the ability to see how our trials help us to grow - to be able to recognize that the shit of life is the fertilizer….

   I’ll add in this little thought as well. I was reading a symposium paper on why bad things happen, and there was a wonderful section that talked about how we CANNOT learn to forgive without being hurt and having someone to forgive. We cannot learn patience without having to struggle with the shortage of time, we can’t gain understanding and empathy without knowing a particular pain - someone who has struggled with illness can understand another who struggles with this also. etc.. While our desire to avoid pain is strong, growth, understanding and the development of Christ-like qualities comes only through knowing the opposite side of it. 

   Which takes us to #4 - Episode 227, my interview with Carrington Smith, the author of Blooming: Finding Gifts in the Shit of Life

   Here’s a clip from listener favorite #4: (Tune into the audio program)

   You can find the whole episode that includes her numerous personal stories of rape and abuse and how she comes to claim her story. Episode 227.

   #3

   Now, What is #3 for 2022? The 3rd most downloaded episode is: Episode 218 - Life Engineered with Rusty Lindquist. 

   I’m loving this countdown, because each of the top downloads, as it turns out, are all super life tools.

   #5 - Having the faith to step out and take action

   #4 - Understanding that our trials and failures are really our greatest tools for building our character and refining us.

   And now, in #3 - Creating our life with intention - Engineering the life you want on purpose

   Tune into the audio program to hear a clip from my interview with Rusty Lindquist.

   To listen to the entire episode, pull up episode 218 on your app or on loveyourstorypodcast.com 

   #2

   Now we are to #2 - The second most downloaded episode this year was:

   Episode 212: Domestic Violence: Interview Brielle Cotterman and Melissa Haenchen

   Brielle Cotterman shared her attempted murder story, and Melissa Haenchen of the Utah Domestic Violence Coalition shared tips for escaping a domestic violence situation in this episode.

   In this clip you’ll hear part of her story, but the larger episode goes into a lot more detail about grooming, what to watch out for, and how to seek help. Here’s a taste of the #2 favorite for 2022.

   To listen to the entire episode, find episode 212 and listen as these two women share so many good pointers gained from their own experiences - with Brielle having experienced it herself, and with Melissa working with so many woman with so many stories.

   #1

   We are finally to #1! The most downloaded show of 2022 was: Episode 211: Healthy Co-Parenting - my interview with Jae Behrman and Amanda Louder.

   This episode was fascinating because it’s not very often that you get to speak with both a husband and a wife, who have divorced, and who take responsibility for their parts in the dissolution of the marriage. It was such an interesting interview because Amanda was very clear in calling out Jae’s abuses, but Jae was incredible in claiming them, learning from them, and sharing how they had both grown. No Jerry Springer drama….though it certainly could have been.

   Before I share the clip, let me just say, I love the topic of this episode because taking about healthy co-parenting is not something you hear very often, and yet it is a topic that should get a lot more air time because so many of us need to know how to do it, and need to do better at it. So, definitely take in the whole episode if you missed this one, especially if you co-parent in a divorce situation.

   This number 1 episode with Jae and Amanda stands out because of their honesty with the audience and with each other. It stands out because we are talking about something that doesn’t get talked about enough - healthy co-parenting, and it stands out because it’s so unique to have people claiming their responsibility for breaking things, and being able to share appreciation for growth in relationships that have caused so much pain. Jae and Amanda set a great example for all who do or will walk the path of broken marriage and co-parenting. Thanks to them, and thanks to all who have been on the show this year!! I’m deeply grateful to all of you for what I have learned and for your courage. 

   As we end the show - I want to thank YOU for being here. Really! Thank you for sharing this time with me.

   And, thanks to all who have hopped on and left a review for the show. I appreciate you very much. Please do now, if you haven’t. I want to share a review we got from  jla1206 from United States. JLA 1206 says:

   Title: Lori creates a safe place for all of us

   I was not always been comfortable with my story. This podcast has helped me see the beauty, depth, joy, richness, and compassion available to me regardless of how hard my story seemed at times. I love every interview and insight offered. And feel like Lori does an exceptional job at creating a safe place for all of us to discover and fall in love with our stories. Thank you Lori for sharing your gifts with us!

   Have a wonderful close out of 2022 and a wonderful New Year! A quick reminder about LIFE - Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday - the 21 Life Connection Challenges. If you still need Christmas gifts, this book is more than a gift - it’s a path to living life with more connection, self-care and possibility, and what could be more wonderful than that? It spells out all the 21 Challenges - 21 Life Hacks that are fun to implement, but provide you with so many tips for living your life on purpose. You can find it on Amazon or go to LoveYourStoryPodcast.com for a link that will take you there!!

   Please come back and join us in 2023 for another year of brave stories, insights, lessons, struggles and successes. Happy New Year!

   ]]>58157374-9558-464b-9cad-72603b878ec9Wed, 28 Dec 2022 06:00:00 -070025:42falsefull235235Lori LeeEpisode 234: Your Extraordinary Starts Now - Interview Shannon Bahrke-HappeEpisode 234: Your Extraordinary Starts Now - Interview Shannon Bahrke-Happe

   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast.

   Do you remember Shannon Bahrke Happe? Her 12-year career on the U.S. Ski Team, which brought her to the Olympics. Check out this list of her accomplishments:

    Member of 3 Olympic Teams (2002, 2006, 2010)

    Bronze Medal in Vancouver, CAN, 2010

    Silver Medal in Salt Lake City, UT, 2002

   World Championships:

    Member of 6 World Championship Teams

   World Cups:

    Member of U.S. Freestyle Ski Team for 12 years (1998-2010)

    On "A" Team (top 10 in the world or higher) all 12 years

    Over World Cup title, 2003

    7 World Cup wins

    26 World Cup podiums

   U.S. National Championships:

    6 U.S. titles

   Geez.. Well, today she’s here to reveal how she overcame obstacles, doubts, and fears to ultimately earn her 2 Olympic Medals. Shannon will also share how the same mindset, tools, and strategies directly correlate to how EVERYONE can execute them to achieve their maximum potential! 

   Click the link to listen to our discussion and to feel her energy.

   Today’s show is titled - Your Extra-Ordinary Starts Now! And Shannon Bahrke Happe is here to talk about how she did it.

   Welcome Shannon!

   Tune in to hear our discussion about the following:

   As always I want to start with your story. I listened to your TED talk where you talked about how average you felt you were, and yet here you are with a 12-year career on the US Ski Team and 2 Olympic medals. How did you go from average person to Olympic medal winner?

   As I mentioned, I’ve titled this episode: Your extraordinary starts now - because that’s what you teach. So teach us a little about how to be extraordinary. 

   Great things take work. A sense of entitlement will NOT help you accomplish much. I worry about the upcoming generation who often think if something is hard that it’s not meant for them. Let’s talk about how to develop mental toughness.

   You have the “Always do 1 More” adage. Can you teach us about that?

   You talk about envisioning the end goal with our senses. What does that look like? How have you used that? - a little manifesting hack here.

   Every day we have hundreds of choices - actions, reactions, these choices matter because they change the outcome. How do we “choose to win” in these small daily choices. 

   Turn your biggest challenges and roadblocks into opportunities - what does this look like? I love putting this one out there. This is an important tool to understand when you are mired in a really tough space.

   Final thoughts on living extraordinary lives on purpose?

   To Contact Shannon Bahrke-Happe

   ShannonBahrke.com

   TeamEmpowerHour.com

   (713) 670-4047

   MogulMama@mac.com

   Let’s end with two quotes: 

   1. ”Whether you think you can, or think you can't, you're probably right." - Henry Ford 

   2. Albert Einstein said, “In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.”

   You only have one life to live, so why not make it something fabulous and unforgettable? As a 20-something I had a poem on my wall called If I had My Life to Live Over. The author was talking about dancing in the rain and eating chocolate cake for breakfast and worrying less and celebrating more. I think we could all stand to take a moment to stop, step out of the rat race, take a breath and decide how we want to make a difference, how we want to be grateful and powerful and what it means to us, individually to live an ordinary live or an extraordinary life. Sometime it’s just small and simple things that make a huge difference. It is a path of mindset shifts, of positive talk shifts, of a choice to do one...]]>Episode 234: Your Extraordinary Starts Now - Interview Shannon Bahrke-Happe

   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast.

   Do you remember Shannon Bahrke Happe? Her 12-year career on the U.S. Ski Team, which brought her to the Olympics. Check out this list of her accomplishments:

    Member of 3 Olympic Teams (2002, 2006, 2010)

    Bronze Medal in Vancouver, CAN, 2010

    Silver Medal in Salt Lake City, UT, 2002

   World Championships:

    Member of 6 World Championship Teams

   World Cups:

    Member of U.S. Freestyle Ski Team for 12 years (1998-2010)

    On "A" Team (top 10 in the world or higher) all 12 years

    Over World Cup title, 2003

    7 World Cup wins

    26 World Cup podiums

   U.S. National Championships:

    6 U.S. titles

   Geez.. Well, today she’s here to reveal how she overcame obstacles, doubts, and fears to ultimately earn her 2 Olympic Medals. Shannon will also share how the same mindset, tools, and strategies directly correlate to how EVERYONE can execute them to achieve their maximum potential! 

   Click the link to listen to our discussion and to feel her energy.

   Today’s show is titled - Your Extra-Ordinary Starts Now! And Shannon Bahrke Happe is here to talk about how she did it.

   Welcome Shannon!

   Tune in to hear our discussion about the following:

   As always I want to start with your story. I listened to your TED talk where you talked about how average you felt you were, and yet here you are with a 12-year career on the US Ski Team and 2 Olympic medals. How did you go from average person to Olympic medal winner?

   As I mentioned, I’ve titled this episode: Your extraordinary starts now - because that’s what you teach. So teach us a little about how to be extraordinary. 

   Great things take work. A sense of entitlement will NOT help you accomplish much. I worry about the upcoming generation who often think if something is hard that it’s not meant for them. Let’s talk about how to develop mental toughness.

   You have the “Always do 1 More” adage. Can you teach us about that?

   You talk about envisioning the end goal with our senses. What does that look like? How have you used that? - a little manifesting hack here.

   Every day we have hundreds of choices - actions, reactions, these choices matter because they change the outcome. How do we “choose to win” in these small daily choices. 

   Turn your biggest challenges and roadblocks into opportunities - what does this look like? I love putting this one out there. This is an important tool to understand when you are mired in a really tough space.

   Final thoughts on living extraordinary lives on purpose?

   To Contact Shannon Bahrke-Happe

   ShannonBahrke.com

   TeamEmpowerHour.com

   (713) 670-4047

   MogulMama@mac.com

   Let’s end with two quotes: 

   1. ”Whether you think you can, or think you can't, you're probably right." - Henry Ford 

   2. Albert Einstein said, “In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.”

   You only have one life to live, so why not make it something fabulous and unforgettable? As a 20-something I had a poem on my wall called If I had My Life to Live Over. The author was talking about dancing in the rain and eating chocolate cake for breakfast and worrying less and celebrating more. I think we could all stand to take a moment to stop, step out of the rat race, take a breath and decide how we want to make a difference, how we want to be grateful and powerful and what it means to us, individually to live an ordinary live or an extraordinary life. Sometime it’s just small and simple things that make a huge difference. It is a path of mindset shifts, of positive talk shifts, of a choice to do one more thing, a choice to keep at it, a choice to follow your intuition not your fear, and before you know it, life is big and bold and extraordinary.

   Your challenge for this week is to take that moment. Step away for 30 minutes from the rat race and take a deep breath, maybe sit alone in a coffee shop and nurse your favorite tea or cocoa while you think; maybe walk a forest trail, or get up early and have the morning to yourself so you can take stock - but do that, decide what small and simple thing you can add on your path to creating the life you REALLY want, on purpose.

   ]]>be895f5b-c5cc-4221-8530-b846a506168aWed, 14 Dec 2022 06:00:00 -070033:44falsefull234234Lori LeeEpisode 233: Little Bites of Bravery - Life HackEpisode 233: Little Bites of Bravery - Life Hack

   November is a set of 3 episodes called 15-minute life hacks. I’m calling the November nudges. Each episode is a quick reminder of a life tool to inspire and help you connect to the world around you as you create your best life story on purpose.

   Today is week 3 and we’re all about courage. It’s called Little Bites of Bravery. This life hack is about how to tackle the scarier, bigger things in our lives, and Jessica Burrell, owner of Life Amplified is with me for all 3 episodes.

   Come with us for a quickie. This one’s about taking it one step at a time.

   Tune into the audio program for my discussion with Jess about the importance of being brave - even in small increments.

   We talk about things like:

   What is Bravery? — the quality or state of having or showing mental or moral strength to face danger, fear, or difficulty.

   I first heard the saying “Little bites of bravery,” from Lady Gaga on her interview with Oprah on May 31, 2022; Your Life In Focus Tour

   Lady Gaga started the Born This Way Foundation, (Foundation to support mental health) they encourage courage with “Little Bites of Bravery” 

   She said, “Just be a little braver every day. If you feel like you can’t do something, just go take a little bite of bravery. I promise you before you know it, you’re taking a big ol’ bite of bravery.”

   Be Brave for 10 seconds. What can I step into for 10 seconds? Think about that...

   A couple quotes we like on this topic:

   “I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.” 

   ― Nelson Mandela

   “It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed.” 

   ― Theodore Roosevelt

   Tune in while I tell the story: The Giant

   I found this story in the book -Lead with a Story, by Paul Smith. (American Management Association, 2012, Pg 144-145)

   Once upon a time, in a land far away, there lived a very bright and trustworthy young woman. Having learned all she could in her own village, she set out to explore the neighboring lands. After some time, she came upon a great city surrounded by a huge castle wall. “Surely I can learn something new from the people here,” she thought to herself. But after entering the city, she found its people too frightened and depressed to share any wisdom. “Why is everyone here so sad?” she asked. One trembling citizen answered, “Today is the day the giant comes.”

   “Giant?” she scoffed in disbelief. “There’s no such thing as giants.”;

   “Oh, but there is,” came the response. “He stands over 10 feet tall! So tall, he can’t rightly be called a man at all.”

   Skeptical, but intrigued, the young woman pleaded, “Tell me more of this giant.”

   So the frightened citizen nervously explained to her, “Every year, on the same day, and at the same hour, he comes down from the mountain where he lives. He stands at the edge of the clearing and yells, ‘Send out your bravest man for me to fight, or I will knock down these walls and kill everyone inside!’ Each year, one poor valiant soul steps out to face the giant and there he stands, mesmerized by the giant’s enormity and the impossible task ahead. Every year the giant slays the poor warrior where he stands before he even draws his sword. The warrior doesn’t even move. It’s as if he is hypnotized.”

   Eyes wide with fascination, the woman begs, “Can I see this giant?”

   “The only way to see the giant,” the citizen explained “is to face him in battle.”

   “Eager to learn, the woman responded, “Then that is what I will do.”

   Shortly thereafter the voice of the giant rang through the village and the woman stepped out...]]>Episode 233: Little Bites of Bravery - Life Hack

   November is a set of 3 episodes called 15-minute life hacks. I’m calling the November nudges. Each episode is a quick reminder of a life tool to inspire and help you connect to the world around you as you create your best life story on purpose.

   Today is week 3 and we’re all about courage. It’s called Little Bites of Bravery. This life hack is about how to tackle the scarier, bigger things in our lives, and Jessica Burrell, owner of Life Amplified is with me for all 3 episodes.

   Come with us for a quickie. This one’s about taking it one step at a time.

   Tune into the audio program for my discussion with Jess about the importance of being brave - even in small increments.

   We talk about things like:

   What is Bravery? — the quality or state of having or showing mental or moral strength to face danger, fear, or difficulty.

   I first heard the saying “Little bites of bravery,” from Lady Gaga on her interview with Oprah on May 31, 2022; Your Life In Focus Tour

   Lady Gaga started the Born This Way Foundation, (Foundation to support mental health) they encourage courage with “Little Bites of Bravery” 

   She said, “Just be a little braver every day. If you feel like you can’t do something, just go take a little bite of bravery. I promise you before you know it, you’re taking a big ol’ bite of bravery.”

   Be Brave for 10 seconds. What can I step into for 10 seconds? Think about that...

   A couple quotes we like on this topic:

   “I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.” 

   ― Nelson Mandela

   “It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed.” 

   ― Theodore Roosevelt

   Tune in while I tell the story: The Giant

   I found this story in the book -Lead with a Story, by Paul Smith. (American Management Association, 2012, Pg 144-145)

   Once upon a time, in a land far away, there lived a very bright and trustworthy young woman. Having learned all she could in her own village, she set out to explore the neighboring lands. After some time, she came upon a great city surrounded by a huge castle wall. “Surely I can learn something new from the people here,” she thought to herself. But after entering the city, she found its people too frightened and depressed to share any wisdom. “Why is everyone here so sad?” she asked. One trembling citizen answered, “Today is the day the giant comes.”

   “Giant?” she scoffed in disbelief. “There’s no such thing as giants.”;

   “Oh, but there is,” came the response. “He stands over 10 feet tall! So tall, he can’t rightly be called a man at all.”

   Skeptical, but intrigued, the young woman pleaded, “Tell me more of this giant.”

   So the frightened citizen nervously explained to her, “Every year, on the same day, and at the same hour, he comes down from the mountain where he lives. He stands at the edge of the clearing and yells, ‘Send out your bravest man for me to fight, or I will knock down these walls and kill everyone inside!’ Each year, one poor valiant soul steps out to face the giant and there he stands, mesmerized by the giant’s enormity and the impossible task ahead. Every year the giant slays the poor warrior where he stands before he even draws his sword. The warrior doesn’t even move. It’s as if he is hypnotized.”

   Eyes wide with fascination, the woman begs, “Can I see this giant?”

   “The only way to see the giant,” the citizen explained “is to face him in battle.”

   “Eager to learn, the woman responded, “Then that is what I will do.”

   Shortly thereafter the voice of the giant rang through the village and the woman stepped out to meet him.

   She looked out across the clearing to the edge of the forest at the foothills of the mountain. Sure enough, there stood an enormous giant! For a moment, she just stood and stared at him from a distance. There was a gentle rise in the ground separating the two, so she could only see him from the waist up. It was difficult to tell exactly how big he was, but he was clearly taller than any man she had ever seen or heard of. She was struck with the same awe and terror all of her predecessors surely felt at that moment. The giant was real. Facing him today she would surely die. She considered running back inside the castle walls, but she had given her word to the people to face their giant, so with all the bravery she could muster she began to walk tentatively toward the giant. And, the giant began to walk toward her.

   After a few paces up the gentle incline, she gained a full line of sight to the giant and she could see his whole form. With the better angle, she could tell he was not nearly the 10 feet in height she first believed but was perhaps only 7-feet-tall. He was still massive, but at least now in human proportions. She was still no match for him, but at least she would meet her defeat at the hands of something recognizable.

   With that element of the unknown removed, she was able to walk at a normal pace and after a few more steps the giant appeared to be smaller still. Was this some strange optical illusion? The giant appeared to be not much bigger than she was now. She might actually have a chance! With this new hope, her pace quickened. And with every step, she could tell it was no illusion. The giant was actually shrinking before her very eyes and the faster she ran, the faster the giant shrank.

   Her terror had turned to hope, and now that hope and turned to confidence. Certain of her victory, she was now in an all-out sprint toward the giant. As she reached the middle of the clearing she stopped and stood toe-to-toe with the “giant” who was now only 12 inches tall and still shrinking. She reached down and picked him up in the palm of her hand. She only had time to ask one question before he disappeared. “Who are you?” she said.

   The giant responded in a tiny and dwindling voice, “I am known by many names, but to your people I am known as fear.”

   We all have fear. That’ is part of being human. There is no shame in recognizing or admitting that. Some of our fears we understand, like self persecution, avoiding rejection, some things scare the hell out of us and we don’t know why, but either way, moving through a meaningful life means we have to face fears, we have to call on courage. Fully becoming means we push past the banshee voices of anxiety, judgment, doom, certain social ostracization, and face our fears with little bites of bravery. 

   Throw yourself forward one little step at a time, if that’s all you can muster.

   Share this episode and let’s keep up our forward momentum. 

   See you in two weeks for the next great episode - it's holiday time. We've got some fun December episodes coming up.

   ]]>8b21988e-0ac6-44af-81a2-463de2f56584Wed, 30 Nov 2022 06:00:00 -070019:35falsefull233233Lori LeeEpisode 232: Be an Encourager - Life HackEpisode 232: Be an Encourager - Life Hack

   Welcome to the LYS Podcast 

   November is a set of 3 episodes called 15-minute life hacks. I’m calling the November nudges. Each episode is a quick reminder of a life tool to inspire and help you connect to the world around you as you create your best life story on purpose.

   Today is week 2 and we’re all about cheerleading. This life hack is about Being and Encourager and Jessica Burrell, owner of Life Amplified will be here for all 3 episodes.

   Come with me for a quickie. This one’s about lifting as we go.

   When I started my Next Level training - that was my emotional intelligence training back in 2016, I had no idea what it would entail. I was there because a friend suggested the training for my own personal growth. I’m not here today to list all the things I gained, but one of those things was a personal coach. My coaches, across my program, not only called me out on my fears and complaints, they not only answered my hard questions, they were also cheerleaders. When I said, “It’s too hard,” or “I can’t do it.” they said, “If you say so.” And, I automatically knew it was up to me to change my attitude. But when I was in the struggle to pull up courage, to face fear and self doubt, they would look at me with complete and utter faith. They would help me envision outcomes and create belief. When I doubted, they did not. Oh my heart! What an incredible gift. To find people who will believe and lift you, support you when you need it most.

   Join us for the audio program where we talk - short and sweet about the importance of encouraging each other.

   Some of the things we talk about:

   “You can borrow my belief in you until you can believe it for yourself.” - Jessica’s friend.

   We don’t do life alone, and we have chances everyday to make a big difference in people’s lives - in the lives of our families and friends. These moments of cheerleading can make a huge difference in each other’s lives, can cement relationships. We can make history when we cheerlead at the crossroads of people’s dreams.

   I heard a story the other day of a little gal that carried glitter in her pockets. When her mom was doing laundry she asked her why there was glitter in her pockets. “Mom,” she said, “you never know when someone needs to be celebrated.”

   Clifton Strength Finders: Jessica’s strength is WOO. How many of your have the gift of Winning Others Over by supporting them.

   Reminder - in my book LIFE - Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday, the 21-Challenges, Challenge 12 is - Give someone in your SOI hardy encouragement for something they are doing. Do what you can to forward THEIR agenda.

   Sometimes this is simple like leaving a podcast review for a podcast you like. Maybe it’s showing up to a ribbon cutting or kick-off party, maybe it’s calling to tell them you know they’ve got what it takes to make their dream happen. Think about the other person, what they are trying to accomplish - how you can support them and what you can contribute to helping them move forward. By small and simple things. 

   Whether it’s glitter in your pocket to throw for those spontaneous celebrations, or really standing for someone’s dream. Whether it’s a quick phone call to say, “you can do it,” or creating a killer play-list for someone with all the “take the world by storm” songs, let’s be cheerleaders. 

   Of course your challenge this week is to find someone in your SOI that you can cheer on. That you can celebrate. That you can shore up their foundation when they doubt.

   LET’S DO THIS! Have a great two weeks, until we meet again.

   ]]>Episode 232: Be an Encourager - Life Hack

   Welcome to the LYS Podcast 

   November is a set of 3 episodes called 15-minute life hacks. I’m calling the November nudges. Each episode is a quick reminder of a life tool to inspire and help you connect to the world around you as you create your best life story on purpose.

   Today is week 2 and we’re all about cheerleading. This life hack is about Being and Encourager and Jessica Burrell, owner of Life Amplified will be here for all 3 episodes.

   Come with me for a quickie. This one’s about lifting as we go.

   When I started my Next Level training - that was my emotional intelligence training back in 2016, I had no idea what it would entail. I was there because a friend suggested the training for my own personal growth. I’m not here today to list all the things I gained, but one of those things was a personal coach. My coaches, across my program, not only called me out on my fears and complaints, they not only answered my hard questions, they were also cheerleaders. When I said, “It’s too hard,” or “I can’t do it.” they said, “If you say so.” And, I automatically knew it was up to me to change my attitude. But when I was in the struggle to pull up courage, to face fear and self doubt, they would look at me with complete and utter faith. They would help me envision outcomes and create belief. When I doubted, they did not. Oh my heart! What an incredible gift. To find people who will believe and lift you, support you when you need it most.

   Join us for the audio program where we talk - short and sweet about the importance of encouraging each other.

   Some of the things we talk about:

   “You can borrow my belief in you until you can believe it for yourself.” - Jessica’s friend.

   We don’t do life alone, and we have chances everyday to make a big difference in people’s lives - in the lives of our families and friends. These moments of cheerleading can make a huge difference in each other’s lives, can cement relationships. We can make history when we cheerlead at the crossroads of people’s dreams.

   I heard a story the other day of a little gal that carried glitter in her pockets. When her mom was doing laundry she asked her why there was glitter in her pockets. “Mom,” she said, “you never know when someone needs to be celebrated.”

   Clifton Strength Finders: Jessica’s strength is WOO. How many of your have the gift of Winning Others Over by supporting them.

   Reminder - in my book LIFE - Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday, the 21-Challenges, Challenge 12 is - Give someone in your SOI hardy encouragement for something they are doing. Do what you can to forward THEIR agenda.

   Sometimes this is simple like leaving a podcast review for a podcast you like. Maybe it’s showing up to a ribbon cutting or kick-off party, maybe it’s calling to tell them you know they’ve got what it takes to make their dream happen. Think about the other person, what they are trying to accomplish - how you can support them and what you can contribute to helping them move forward. By small and simple things. 

   Whether it’s glitter in your pocket to throw for those spontaneous celebrations, or really standing for someone’s dream. Whether it’s a quick phone call to say, “you can do it,” or creating a killer play-list for someone with all the “take the world by storm” songs, let’s be cheerleaders. 

   Of course your challenge this week is to find someone in your SOI that you can cheer on. That you can celebrate. That you can shore up their foundation when they doubt.

   LET’S DO THIS! Have a great two weeks, until we meet again.

   ]]>04d16801-3472-4b32-926d-0ab859f52ef4Wed, 16 Nov 2022 06:00:00 -070018:47falsefull232232Lori LeeEpisode 231: Life Hack - Clearing ConversationsEpisode 231: Life Hack - Clearing Conversations: 5 Steps to Clearing Up Miscommunication November is a set of 3 episodes called 15-minute life hacks. I’m calling the November nudges. Each episode is a quick reminder of a life tool to inspire and help you connect to the world around you as you create your best life story on purpose.   Today is week 1 and we’re bring you 5 actionable steps for clearing up misunderstandings. This life hack is about communication, and Jessica Burrell, owner of Life Amplified will be here for all 3 episodes.   The other day I was at a music festival and most everyone was busy enjoying the music, but one young man walked by the outskirts of the main body screaming into his phone. He REALLY wanted to be heard by the party on the other side.   Communication vies for the top rung on the ladder of human struggles. We want so badly to be heard and understood, as does each person we interact with. But we all have different backgrounds, different stories in our minds, different insecurities that trigger hot buttons, different experiences. We all create different stories in our minds about what is going on. This makes clear communication extremely challenging.   Add in things like text and email that allow things to be taken out of context. It’s a wonder we are not all constantly misunderstanding. Or, maybe we are. Join the audio for my discussion with Jessica Burrell, owner of Amplify Your Life as we discuss the 5 steps of having a clearing conversation. Step 1 - Tell the event without emotion Step 2 - The stories I made up about myself were... Step 3 - The stories I made up about you/institution/world were... Step 4 - I acknowledge my stories and what they created... Step 5 - In the future I commit to...   We share examples about a misunderstanding between Jessica and I; a misunderstanding between Jessica and one of her teammates, we talk about how we create stories in our own minds…. This is one of the most important and self aware aspects of this process.   We can all use clearing conversations multiple times a week. We can use them everybody - kids, friends, associates, parents, etc. This is a person-to-person skill set. Ya know, communication skills should have been taught in public schools, but since they aren’t we get to acquire our own communication skills along our individual paths. This one is golden.   Your challenge this week is to have a clearing conversation with someone you have a misunderstanding with. Just try it. Let them know you’re trying a new format and have them work with you.   I promise - it’s worth it. Please share this with someone - maybe even the someone you want to have the clearing conversation with. We’ll see you in two weeks for the next 15-minute life hack.]]>Episode 231: Life Hack - Clearing Conversations: 5 Steps to Clearing Up Miscommunication November is a set of 3 episodes called 15-minute life hacks. I’m calling the November nudges. Each episode is a quick reminder of a life tool to inspire and help you connect to the world around you as you create your best life story on purpose.   Today is week 1 and we’re bring you 5 actionable steps for clearing up misunderstandings. This life hack is about communication, and Jessica Burrell, owner of Life Amplified will be here for all 3 episodes.   The other day I was at a music festival and most everyone was busy enjoying the music, but one young man walked by the outskirts of the main body screaming into his phone. He REALLY wanted to be heard by the party on the other side.   Communication vies for the top rung on the ladder of human struggles. We want so badly to be heard and understood, as does each person we interact with. But we all have different backgrounds, different stories in our minds, different insecurities that trigger hot buttons, different experiences. We all create different stories in our minds about what is going on. This makes clear communication extremely challenging.   Add in things like text and email that allow things to be taken out of context. It’s a wonder we are not all constantly misunderstanding. Or, maybe we are. Join the audio for my discussion with Jessica Burrell, owner of Amplify Your Life as we discuss the 5 steps of having a clearing conversation. Step 1 - Tell the event without emotion Step 2 - The stories I made up about myself were... Step 3 - The stories I made up about you/institution/world were... Step 4 - I acknowledge my stories and what they created... Step 5 - In the future I commit to...   We share examples about a misunderstanding between Jessica and I; a misunderstanding between Jessica and one of her teammates, we talk about how we create stories in our own minds…. This is one of the most important and self aware aspects of this process.   We can all use clearing conversations multiple times a week. We can use them everybody - kids, friends, associates, parents, etc. This is a person-to-person skill set. Ya know, communication skills should have been taught in public schools, but since they aren’t we get to acquire our own communication skills along our individual paths. This one is golden.   Your challenge this week is to have a clearing conversation with someone you have a misunderstanding with. Just try it. Let them know you’re trying a new format and have them work with you.   I promise - it’s worth it. Please share this with someone - maybe even the someone you want to have the clearing conversation with. We’ll see you in two weeks for the next 15-minute life hack.]]>42a0e36c-f195-4cda-a9c7-b3274b6796f6Wed, 02 Nov 2022 06:00:00 -070021:24falsefull231231Lori LeeEpisode 230: Your Story Matters - Interview Amy ChandlerEpisode 230: Your Story Matters - Interview Amy Chandler Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Every once in awhile I find another story practitioner who preaches the same truths I teach. Birds of a feather - another who understands this simple but often overlooked idea of how much our stories matter, how powerful we can be when we realize the power in our stories, and our ability to write them with intention. Today is one of those days. Amy Chandler is an entrepreneur who helps people become an active agent in their story. She is the founder of a non profit called My Story Matters, that started forming about 15 years ago - one chapter at a time. She understands her mission is to empower people with the tools and resources they need to write their own story. As they do so, they choose to claim and create the future they want to achieve. She knows that within each of us is a unique skill set designed to help us achieve far more than we realize. Tune into the audio program for our talk - because Amy has been to correctional facilities, in elementary schools, in high schools, all over the place helping people tell their stories, and I think you’ll like hearing about her adventures and seeing what they tell you about the importance of your own story. I asked Amy questions like:
   1. Amy, let’s start off with what you do in My Story Matters. What exactly do you do and who do you do it with?
   2. In your work, what stories can you share of watching people step into their power as they own their stories?
   3. Let’s talk about intentional living. What is your take on that - specifically about healing? Share any specific story of this happening?
   4. You talk about claiming and creating a life of miracles. What does that mean to you?
   5. One of the quotes you often share is “When we give voice and energy to our war stories they consume us. When we give voice and energy to our champion story it transforms us.” This sounds a lot like what I call - THE STORIES WE TELL OURSELVES. Let’s talk about this a bit.
   6. I’d really like to hear about what you call, "dealing with life’s detours through the growth zone”
   7. Let’s end with some stories of transformation that you have witnessed as the people you have worked with have stepped up to find, tell, accept their stories.
   
   Find Amy: amy@mystorymatters.org www.mystorymatters.org www.safeharborscourse.com @mystorymatters Why do our stories matter? I think they matter on multiple levels. They matter to us individually because they are literally the playing out of our lives. They matter to us because we want to have adventure, fun, love, accomplishment, satisfaction, growth. They matter to us because if our lives don’t matter, the foundation of purpose starts to dissolve. Our stories also matter from a simple space of empowerment. When you know who you are and the power you have to create just what you want, you realize you are powerful, you matter, and that ties us into why our stories matter to each other. Our stories matter to each other because we are all in the same giant play. Our characters interact, we benefit from one another, we share with one another, we hurt one another sometimes, we set off domino effects everyday that matter to many people (in kind and positive ways as well as cruel and difficult ways), we shine a light on the way ahead as we share our stories and support one another. No one does life alone, we all need each other, and like it or not, acknowledge it or not, our lives are woven together like a...]]>Episode 230: Your Story Matters - Interview Amy Chandler Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Every once in awhile I find another story practitioner who preaches the same truths I teach. Birds of a feather - another who understands this simple but often overlooked idea of how much our stories matter, how powerful we can be when we realize the power in our stories, and our ability to write them with intention. Today is one of those days. Amy Chandler is an entrepreneur who helps people become an active agent in their story. She is the founder of a non profit called My Story Matters, that started forming about 15 years ago - one chapter at a time. She understands her mission is to empower people with the tools and resources they need to write their own story. As they do so, they choose to claim and create the future they want to achieve. She knows that within each of us is a unique skill set designed to help us achieve far more than we realize. Tune into the audio program for our talk - because Amy has been to correctional facilities, in elementary schools, in high schools, all over the place helping people tell their stories, and I think you’ll like hearing about her adventures and seeing what they tell you about the importance of your own story. I asked Amy questions like:
   1. Amy, let’s start off with what you do in My Story Matters. What exactly do you do and who do you do it with?
   2. In your work, what stories can you share of watching people step into their power as they own their stories?
   3. Let’s talk about intentional living. What is your take on that - specifically about healing? Share any specific story of this happening?
   4. You talk about claiming and creating a life of miracles. What does that mean to you?
   5. One of the quotes you often share is “When we give voice and energy to our war stories they consume us. When we give voice and energy to our champion story it transforms us.” This sounds a lot like what I call - THE STORIES WE TELL OURSELVES. Let’s talk about this a bit.
   6. I’d really like to hear about what you call, "dealing with life’s detours through the growth zone”
   7. Let’s end with some stories of transformation that you have witnessed as the people you have worked with have stepped up to find, tell, accept their stories.
   
   Find Amy: amy@mystorymatters.org www.mystorymatters.org www.safeharborscourse.com @mystorymatters Why do our stories matter? I think they matter on multiple levels. They matter to us individually because they are literally the playing out of our lives. They matter to us because we want to have adventure, fun, love, accomplishment, satisfaction, growth. They matter to us because if our lives don’t matter, the foundation of purpose starts to dissolve. Our stories also matter from a simple space of empowerment. When you know who you are and the power you have to create just what you want, you realize you are powerful, you matter, and that ties us into why our stories matter to each other. Our stories matter to each other because we are all in the same giant play. Our characters interact, we benefit from one another, we share with one another, we hurt one another sometimes, we set off domino effects everyday that matter to many people (in kind and positive ways as well as cruel and difficult ways), we shine a light on the way ahead as we share our stories and support one another. No one does life alone, we all need each other, and like it or not, acknowledge it or not, our lives are woven together like a tapestry. We are almost inseparable. Our living, our loving, our growing, our falling down, our being, matters deeply to the world. Challenge for the week: Take the opportunity to let someone in your life know how much their life affects you. Share this episode with just one person this week - more if you’re willing to go the extra mile. And remember that Your Story Matters.]]>aa6b0292-39f6-4ad2-9952-64d2720394d4Wed, 19 Oct 2022 06:00:00 -070033:19falsefull230230Lori LeeEpisode 229: Mothering with Intention - Interview Lara JohnsonEpisode 229: Mothering with Intention

   - Interview Lara Johnson

   
   

   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. The other day I had a woman approach me and confide that she was a focused and successful career woman before her children, and that she struggles with being with her kids all the time. It felt like her career was fading away and her kids did not afford her the success she felt in the corporate world. She was panicking and felt a bit like she was drowning. We talked a bit about seasons of life, about investing our time in the things we most value, in living our best, personal lives.

   
   

   Today we are diving into this topic with an expert. Lara Johnson has been married for 14 years, has 3 beautiful tyrants, 2 spicy cats, and a baby on the way. She has the best job in the world helping moms live their lives ON purpose and WITH purpose.

   
   

   In her free time she likes to grow and kill plants, play with pretty rocks, awkwardly dance in the kitchen, read too many books, and spend time with God, nature, and her family.

   
   

   As a speaker, podcast host, writer, consultant, and coach, she has helped thousands of moms be in a better mood, play more with their kids, manage their homes better, get their to-do lists done, and answer their purpose with fire in their Souls. Stay tuned for my talk with her and how mothering/ and apply this to fathering as well, can be less stressful and more of what you want.

   
   

   Can I start with a worry I have? I am always so honored to be a part of sharing the sacred stories of people’s lives. But so often, the triumph comes after the tragedy, the struggle, maybe always….there is no triumph in sitting around and watching TV or in a story that focuses on the easy times of our lives. Therefore, I find that our episodes are often focused on something depressing - an eating disorder, a divorce, mental illness, sexual assault, death, domestic violence….this sounds like dark list, and I can just imagine people saying, geez, I don’t want to tune in to another depressing story, (even though they have happy endings of learning.) So, I’ve tried really hard this year to include lots of positive episodes that focus on creating our life stories on purpose, like the Hero on a Mission series, and noticing and focusing on our happiness in the Practical Happiness episode, or how to Engineer our Lives on purpose, in the Life Engineered episode. Well, today is another of those supportive, live-on-purpose episodes, and this one is about motherhood. How to Mother on purpose in our own unique ways.

   
   

   Tune in to hear my interview with Lara Johnson where we talk about ideas like:

   
   

   Lara - first tell us what you do and why you’re qualified to talk to us about this topic.

   
   

   Motherhood can be a challenge - those of us lucky enough to be mothers have found our way through in different ways. Some moms love babies, some love teens, some love toddlers, some want many kids, some want only one or two, and as we learn and navigate this, we learn who we are and boy is this a workshop for patience and love and joy and things you never imagined. But like all things, we can live reactively or intentionally. Let’s talk about what a reactive MOM life looks like and what a MOM on purpose life looks like.

   
   

   We all come with different talents and abilities. You say, “Your kids don’t need the best, they just need you.” Do you think our children need specifically what we have to offer?

   
   

   You have something called Discover Your Purpose - how does that work?

   
   

   How to Contact Lara Johnson:E: lara@larajohnsoncoaching.com

   
   

   W: Episode 229: Mothering with Intention

   - Interview Lara Johnson

   
   

   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. The other day I had a woman approach me and confide that she was a focused and successful career woman before her children, and that she struggles with being with her kids all the time. It felt like her career was fading away and her kids did not afford her the success she felt in the corporate world. She was panicking and felt a bit like she was drowning. We talked a bit about seasons of life, about investing our time in the things we most value, in living our best, personal lives.

   
   

   Today we are diving into this topic with an expert. Lara Johnson has been married for 14 years, has 3 beautiful tyrants, 2 spicy cats, and a baby on the way. She has the best job in the world helping moms live their lives ON purpose and WITH purpose.

   
   

   In her free time she likes to grow and kill plants, play with pretty rocks, awkwardly dance in the kitchen, read too many books, and spend time with God, nature, and her family.

   
   

   As a speaker, podcast host, writer, consultant, and coach, she has helped thousands of moms be in a better mood, play more with their kids, manage their homes better, get their to-do lists done, and answer their purpose with fire in their Souls. Stay tuned for my talk with her and how mothering/ and apply this to fathering as well, can be less stressful and more of what you want.

   
   

   Can I start with a worry I have? I am always so honored to be a part of sharing the sacred stories of people’s lives. But so often, the triumph comes after the tragedy, the struggle, maybe always….there is no triumph in sitting around and watching TV or in a story that focuses on the easy times of our lives. Therefore, I find that our episodes are often focused on something depressing - an eating disorder, a divorce, mental illness, sexual assault, death, domestic violence….this sounds like dark list, and I can just imagine people saying, geez, I don’t want to tune in to another depressing story, (even though they have happy endings of learning.) So, I’ve tried really hard this year to include lots of positive episodes that focus on creating our life stories on purpose, like the Hero on a Mission series, and noticing and focusing on our happiness in the Practical Happiness episode, or how to Engineer our Lives on purpose, in the Life Engineered episode. Well, today is another of those supportive, live-on-purpose episodes, and this one is about motherhood. How to Mother on purpose in our own unique ways.

   
   

   Tune in to hear my interview with Lara Johnson where we talk about ideas like:

   
   

   Lara - first tell us what you do and why you’re qualified to talk to us about this topic.

   
   

   Motherhood can be a challenge - those of us lucky enough to be mothers have found our way through in different ways. Some moms love babies, some love teens, some love toddlers, some want many kids, some want only one or two, and as we learn and navigate this, we learn who we are and boy is this a workshop for patience and love and joy and things you never imagined. But like all things, we can live reactively or intentionally. Let’s talk about what a reactive MOM life looks like and what a MOM on purpose life looks like.

   
   

   We all come with different talents and abilities. You say, “Your kids don’t need the best, they just need you.” Do you think our children need specifically what we have to offer?

   
   

   You have something called Discover Your Purpose - how does that work?

   
   

   How to Contact Lara Johnson:E: lara@larajohnsoncoaching.com

   
   

   W: larajohnsoncoaching.com

   
   

   IG: @lara.t.johnson

   
   

    

   
   

   Motherhood is the most influential role played on this planet. It is the creation and nurture of new lives, new hearts, new mindsets. It IS, after all, the creation and nurture of people. So this really big role is given to women - regular women who come with baggage and weaknesses and struggles, but we women also have heart, strength, love, wisdom, and an array of talents. As with anything, we can focus on where we feel we fall short, or we can focus on where we shine, on what we bring to the table. I love the idea that what we bring is what our kids need. I also love the reminder that we can approach all roles in our lives with intention. I did a vision board when my children were young and on it I spelled out the things I wanted to leave with them - a love for the outdoors, a secure base, an ability to be self-sufficient, an understanding of living with values. We approached life with these ideas in mind. I took them hiking and skiing, canoeing and canyoneering. I taught them to do their own laundry, they contributed through daily chores as they learned how to do things. I’ve always had their back, and I support them the best I can as they try things, as they succeed, as they fail. I have tried to create a home of safety, good books, good movies, education. When they were small I’d subscribe them to National Geographic kids and we’d watch videos about the Book of Virtues and living well. I’d say that was all very intentional. I’m a bit of a tomboy and I only had boys, which I think is how it should be. I’ve never been able to picture myself doing a little girl’s hair or tolerating a shopaholic or emotional frenzy. Drama, not my thing. So I hope my boys were with me because I was what they need/needed. As we leave today, if you haven’t already, think about how much of your mothering is reactionary, and how much of it is on purpose. Then maybe choose something you can intentionally do with your children that will create something you want to create with them. Your time with your children is an investment, always an investment.

   
   

   Please share this episode with one other mother that you know. We’ll see you in two weeks.

   ]]>43c93f12-52f6-4d12-aa88-0e66424ea09eWed, 05 Oct 2022 06:00:00 -070029:45falsefull229229Lori LeeEpisode 228: The Stewardship Principle - Interview Ganel-Lyn CondieEpisode 228: The Stewardship Principle - Interview Ganel-Lyn Condie

   
   

   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast.

   
   

   “When was the last time you experienced a major shift in your perspective? A moment when you learned something that changed your paradigm so significantly that the way you once saw things is forever altered with a new viewpoint?” So begins the book, “The Stewardship Principle,” by Ganel-Lyn Condie

   
   

   Tune into the audio program because today Ganel-Lyn is on the show to take us deeper into what that paradigm shift is, and I for one, needed the shift.

   
   

   Ganel-Lyn Condie is a popular motivational speaker – she inspires with her unique honesty, authenticity and spirit. She is dedicated to her family, faith, and inspiring others. Ganel-Lyn has experienced healing from a major chronic illness and is the mother to two miracle children. After the heart-breaking suicide of her 40 year old sister, Ganel-Lyn is constantly working towards suicide prevention. Ganel-Lyn lives with an open heart and feels passionate about sharing principles that will empower others to live life with more joy. She is a regular television/radio guest, and hosts the popular shows REAL TALK CFM and THE MIDDLE. Ganel-Lyn’s talks and books have now encouraged thousands of people all over the world.

   
   

    

   
   

   Connect with Ganel-Lyn:

   
   

   Facebook - Real Talk: https://www.facebook.com/groups/realtalkcfm/?multi_permalinks=775617246659046&notif_id=1621479650343120&notif_t=feedback_reaction_generic&ref=notif

   
   

   Website: www.ganellyn.com

   
   

   Instagram - The Middle: https://www.instagram.com/third.hour/

   
   

   Buy her book the Stewardship Principe: https://ganellyn.com/products/

   
   

    

   
   

   Click to listen to the interview:

   
   

   Here are some of my main take-aways from this concept: A. Everything is on loan to us from God, so we can talk with him about how he wants us to handle our stewardships. B. Success is about our process and efforts, not necessarily about the outcome. C. Our stewardships - the good and the bad are tailor made for us, so don’t bother with comparison. D. This whole process of stewarding is what the path to being more like God looks like.

   
   

   This week's challenge: What are you struggling with right now in your life - a child? a relationship? a health issue? Your challenge this week is to shift your mindset from owning this to one of stewardship over it. How does this lighten the load? How does this bring hope?

   
   

   Thanks for being with us. Please share this episode - it’s a couple clicks on your phone to message it to someone you know, and spread the love, joy and understanding around creating your best life on purpose.

   ]]>Episode 228: The Stewardship Principle - Interview Ganel-Lyn Condie

   
   

   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast.

   
   

   “When was the last time you experienced a major shift in your perspective? A moment when you learned something that changed your paradigm so significantly that the way you once saw things is forever altered with a new viewpoint?” So begins the book, “The Stewardship Principle,” by Ganel-Lyn Condie

   
   

   Tune into the audio program because today Ganel-Lyn is on the show to take us deeper into what that paradigm shift is, and I for one, needed the shift.

   
   

   Ganel-Lyn Condie is a popular motivational speaker – she inspires with her unique honesty, authenticity and spirit. She is dedicated to her family, faith, and inspiring others. Ganel-Lyn has experienced healing from a major chronic illness and is the mother to two miracle children. After the heart-breaking suicide of her 40 year old sister, Ganel-Lyn is constantly working towards suicide prevention. Ganel-Lyn lives with an open heart and feels passionate about sharing principles that will empower others to live life with more joy. She is a regular television/radio guest, and hosts the popular shows REAL TALK CFM and THE MIDDLE. Ganel-Lyn’s talks and books have now encouraged thousands of people all over the world.

   
   

    

   
   

   Connect with Ganel-Lyn:

   
   

   Facebook - Real Talk: https://www.facebook.com/groups/realtalkcfm/?multi_permalinks=775617246659046&notif_id=1621479650343120&notif_t=feedback_reaction_generic&ref=notif

   
   

   Website: www.ganellyn.com

   
   

   Instagram - The Middle: https://www.instagram.com/third.hour/

   
   

   Buy her book the Stewardship Principe: https://ganellyn.com/products/

   
   

    

   
   

   Click to listen to the interview:

   
   

   Here are some of my main take-aways from this concept: A. Everything is on loan to us from God, so we can talk with him about how he wants us to handle our stewardships. B. Success is about our process and efforts, not necessarily about the outcome. C. Our stewardships - the good and the bad are tailor made for us, so don’t bother with comparison. D. This whole process of stewarding is what the path to being more like God looks like.

   
   

   This week's challenge: What are you struggling with right now in your life - a child? a relationship? a health issue? Your challenge this week is to shift your mindset from owning this to one of stewardship over it. How does this lighten the load? How does this bring hope?

   
   

   Thanks for being with us. Please share this episode - it’s a couple clicks on your phone to message it to someone you know, and spread the love, joy and understanding around creating your best life on purpose.

   ]]>a35ab2cc-a863-4721-9a84-941606752b28Wed, 21 Sep 2022 06:00:00 -070037:21falsefull228228Lori LeeEpisode 227: Blooming - Interview Carrington SmithEpisode 227: Blooming - Interview Carrington Smith Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. The most beautiful flowers and plants bloom with fertilizer, water, and light. Today’s guest, Carrington Smith, says in her book, “I had been told to shut up and not tell my story. It makes people feel uncomfortable. But the truth is that my power, my secret weapons, my gifts are IN my stories. That is where I discovered the authentic me - where I discovered the gifts, the buried treasure - in all the shit (which turns out to be fertilizer). It is in the debris of life, in the fire, that I found out who I was and what I was made of. Tune in for my interview with Carrington to hear her story and the process of blooming. Carrington Smith is the author of Blooming: Finding Gifts in the Shit of Life. Despite being born into a legacy of wealth, life was not so kind to her. Carrington has survived childhood abuse, sexual assault, two divorces, mountains of debt, religious manipulation, and the loss of close friends. In her bestselling, debut memoir, she combines her wit with wisdom to share her journey from trauma to triumph. Today, with a shift in mindset, she lives a life filled with joy, opportunity, and purpose. We talk about her story at home - Everyone’s story starts at home. You spend a number of chapters giving your background with your family, the incident with you father and the bike ride, the toilet incident at church, your mother’s response to your rape - these stories set a scene of a childhood that was traumatic and unsupportive. Can you share some of these most pivotal stories with us and then let’s talk about what gifts these held for you. Let’s talk about the importance of owning our stories. In your experience, how did you do this? What was the power behind owning your whole messy story?     CONNECT WITH CARRINGTON Carrie@CarringtonLegal.com Carrington-Smith.com +1(512)627-7467 in/CarrieSmithTrabue @CarringtonATX   In each of the interviews on the love your story show, our purpose is to share the stories of our lives and learn from one another how we got through them - that’s what stories do, they inspire and teach. Carrington’s book more or less sums up what we are doing here on every show - listening and learning how to bloom despite the hard stuff. But I think we’re far enough along here to note that in the end, we can really thrive BECAUSE of the hard stuff we go through. We learn who we are as our character unfolds and we learn and grow. We become strong because we had to. We become empathetic because we now understand things we didn’t know before the fertilizer got shoveled our way. We become resilient because we learned to bounce back and regroup. We bloom BECAUSE of the fertilizer. It’s a rough game, and it’s one we often want to tap out of, but understanding how it’s played, can help a lot when the growth spurts happen. Your challenge this week is to choose one of your past challenges - something really tough you went through, and to journal at least 1 page about what you gained from that experience. Just let it free flow as you write, and by the end you’ll be able to dig through and find the gifts. Have a beautiful week and share this, right now, with someone in your life who is struggling. We’ll let the show remind them that there are gifts to be found in the hard stuff. See you in two weeks.]]>Episode 227: Blooming - Interview Carrington Smith Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. The most beautiful flowers and plants bloom with fertilizer, water, and light. Today’s guest, Carrington Smith, says in her book, “I had been told to shut up and not tell my story. It makes people feel uncomfortable. But the truth is that my power, my secret weapons, my gifts are IN my stories. That is where I discovered the authentic me - where I discovered the gifts, the buried treasure - in all the shit (which turns out to be fertilizer). It is in the debris of life, in the fire, that I found out who I was and what I was made of. Tune in for my interview with Carrington to hear her story and the process of blooming. Carrington Smith is the author of Blooming: Finding Gifts in the Shit of Life. Despite being born into a legacy of wealth, life was not so kind to her. Carrington has survived childhood abuse, sexual assault, two divorces, mountains of debt, religious manipulation, and the loss of close friends. In her bestselling, debut memoir, she combines her wit with wisdom to share her journey from trauma to triumph. Today, with a shift in mindset, she lives a life filled with joy, opportunity, and purpose. We talk about her story at home - Everyone’s story starts at home. You spend a number of chapters giving your background with your family, the incident with you father and the bike ride, the toilet incident at church, your mother’s response to your rape - these stories set a scene of a childhood that was traumatic and unsupportive. Can you share some of these most pivotal stories with us and then let’s talk about what gifts these held for you. Let’s talk about the importance of owning our stories. In your experience, how did you do this? What was the power behind owning your whole messy story?     CONNECT WITH CARRINGTON Carrie@CarringtonLegal.com Carrington-Smith.com +1(512)627-7467 in/CarrieSmithTrabue @CarringtonATX   In each of the interviews on the love your story show, our purpose is to share the stories of our lives and learn from one another how we got through them - that’s what stories do, they inspire and teach. Carrington’s book more or less sums up what we are doing here on every show - listening and learning how to bloom despite the hard stuff. But I think we’re far enough along here to note that in the end, we can really thrive BECAUSE of the hard stuff we go through. We learn who we are as our character unfolds and we learn and grow. We become strong because we had to. We become empathetic because we now understand things we didn’t know before the fertilizer got shoveled our way. We become resilient because we learned to bounce back and regroup. We bloom BECAUSE of the fertilizer. It’s a rough game, and it’s one we often want to tap out of, but understanding how it’s played, can help a lot when the growth spurts happen. Your challenge this week is to choose one of your past challenges - something really tough you went through, and to journal at least 1 page about what you gained from that experience. Just let it free flow as you write, and by the end you’ll be able to dig through and find the gifts. Have a beautiful week and share this, right now, with someone in your life who is struggling. We’ll let the show remind them that there are gifts to be found in the hard stuff. See you in two weeks.]]>6417e925-4d51-4054-8c3b-f7950fe21c34Wed, 07 Sep 2022 06:00:00 -070034:25falsefull227227Lori LeeEpisode 226: Life is Hard, But I'll Be Okay - Interview Johnny SirpillaEpisode 226: Life is Hard, But I'll Be Okay - Interview Johnny Sirpilla Welcome to the LYS Podcast. Today’s story is of Johnny Sirpilla, his wife Susan, their struggle with infertility, the death of their triplets, and the power of hope, coming through pain, and learning to live with gratitude.   Johnny Sirpilla, founder of Encourage, LLC, and author of Life is Hard, But I’ll Be OK, he is a professional speaker to businesses, communities and universities, about managing thoughts, leading yourself to productive choices and framing each challenge in your life as an opportunity for self-reflection and growth.   Right up our alley. I want to start with a couple reviews of Johnny Sirpilla’s book - Life is Hard but I’ll Be Ok.   Dr. Nido Qubein, President of High Point University, says… “He has written a book to help anyone deal head-on with any struggle they face so they can become more resilient, eventually heal, and find beauty in the hardship, the silver lining in a dark cloud.”   Srini Pillay, M.D., Harvard-trained psychiatrist, said, “Johnny Sirpilla takes us on a journey through adversity and reminds us that anyone who is falling apart can put themselves together again at a higher level. With a heartwarming style of writing, he reminds us to find the blessings in our struggles and to explore our shadow selves so that we can live in a more whole and self-forgiving way. Touched by magic himself, Sirpilla will remind you that your own magic is more within your reach than you think. A profoundly touching page turner, this book is a must read.”   Tune in to hear my conversation with Johnny as he shares his story and what he's learned. To contact Johnny: johnny@encourage33.com encourage33.com LinkedIn - Johnny-Sirpilla   In a talk by Elder Larry S. Kacher, a Seventy in the LDS Church, called Ladder of Faith, Elder Kacher illustrates what we’ve seen in the Sirpilla’s story. (The Sirpilla family are members of the Catholic church.)   He asks the question, “How will life’s challenges affect our faith in Jesus Christ? And what effect will our faith have on the joy and peace we experience in this life?”   Johnny’s story, and their faith, is a prime example of this - choosing faith has allowed them to find peace.   Elder Kacher goes on, “Accepting God’s will in place of our own is key to finding joy no matter the circumstances….our faith in him, can and will, guide us through the complexities of life. Indeed we find that there is simplicity on the other side of life’s complexities as we remain steadfast in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope.” This story Johnny has shared today, is one of resilience and the power of managing thoughts to seek gratitude when life is hard - I hope you have found a light in his experience that will shine on your own path.  Remember that though life can be hard, you can be okay. Please share this episode with someone you think would benefit from hearing it. We’ll see you in two weeks for the next episode of the Love Your Story podcast.            ]]>Episode 226: Life is Hard, But I'll Be Okay - Interview Johnny Sirpilla Welcome to the LYS Podcast. Today’s story is of Johnny Sirpilla, his wife Susan, their struggle with infertility, the death of their triplets, and the power of hope, coming through pain, and learning to live with gratitude.   Johnny Sirpilla, founder of Encourage, LLC, and author of Life is Hard, But I’ll Be OK, he is a professional speaker to businesses, communities and universities, about managing thoughts, leading yourself to productive choices and framing each challenge in your life as an opportunity for self-reflection and growth.   Right up our alley. I want to start with a couple reviews of Johnny Sirpilla’s book - Life is Hard but I’ll Be Ok.   Dr. Nido Qubein, President of High Point University, says… “He has written a book to help anyone deal head-on with any struggle they face so they can become more resilient, eventually heal, and find beauty in the hardship, the silver lining in a dark cloud.”   Srini Pillay, M.D., Harvard-trained psychiatrist, said, “Johnny Sirpilla takes us on a journey through adversity and reminds us that anyone who is falling apart can put themselves together again at a higher level. With a heartwarming style of writing, he reminds us to find the blessings in our struggles and to explore our shadow selves so that we can live in a more whole and self-forgiving way. Touched by magic himself, Sirpilla will remind you that your own magic is more within your reach than you think. A profoundly touching page turner, this book is a must read.”   Tune in to hear my conversation with Johnny as he shares his story and what he's learned. To contact Johnny: johnny@encourage33.com encourage33.com LinkedIn - Johnny-Sirpilla   In a talk by Elder Larry S. Kacher, a Seventy in the LDS Church, called Ladder of Faith, Elder Kacher illustrates what we’ve seen in the Sirpilla’s story. (The Sirpilla family are members of the Catholic church.)   He asks the question, “How will life’s challenges affect our faith in Jesus Christ? And what effect will our faith have on the joy and peace we experience in this life?”   Johnny’s story, and their faith, is a prime example of this - choosing faith has allowed them to find peace.   Elder Kacher goes on, “Accepting God’s will in place of our own is key to finding joy no matter the circumstances….our faith in him, can and will, guide us through the complexities of life. Indeed we find that there is simplicity on the other side of life’s complexities as we remain steadfast in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope.” This story Johnny has shared today, is one of resilience and the power of managing thoughts to seek gratitude when life is hard - I hope you have found a light in his experience that will shine on your own path.  Remember that though life can be hard, you can be okay. Please share this episode with someone you think would benefit from hearing it. We’ll see you in two weeks for the next episode of the Love Your Story podcast.            ]]>a2f3194b-809a-42a0-84ee-14904e32015dWed, 24 Aug 2022 06:00:00 -070038:15falsefull226226Lori LeeEpisode 225: Wonders and Miracles - Interview Liza LawrenceEpisode 225: Wonders and Miracles - Interview Liza Lawrence Albert Einstein said, “There are only two ways to live your life: as though nothing is a miracle, or as though everything is a miracle.” Miracles - what are they? I suggest that miracles are things that we don’t yet know how to explain. They are events or happenings that go beyond what we can do for ourselves. We often beg for miracles, search for miracles, or manifest miracles by our faith. One thing I found really interesting about Christ’s ministry, is that before he did any miracle he said to the person, “Be it unto you according to your faith.” I find that fascinating. According to this, I draw the conclusion that first one must believe before miracles occur. Today I’ve invited Liza Laurence to the show - she is the host of the Wonders and Miracles podcast, to discuss her thoughts on miracles and some of the incredible ones she has heard, and then I’m going to share clips from 3 past podcasts, where my interviewees share some pretty miraculous experiences. Tune into the audio program to hear it straight from the people who are kind and brave enough to share their personal experiences. Do you believe God can do miracles? Do you believe you can create miracles because you believe strongly in a course of action? That belief in God, in ourselves, in the power of Universal law working for our good, despite our current limited understanding, seems to be crucial in the manifestation of miracles. Today’s discussion brings awareness to some unusual, even inexplicable things that create awe and wonder. Magic. Let’s welcome Liza Laurence, the host of the Wonders and Miracles podcast. Join us to hear Liza answer questions like: 1. What do you think is the definition of a miracle? 2. How many miracles have you shared with the guests on your podcast? How many episodes do you have up? 3. What are your top 3 miracles you were most awed in hearing? 4. Why do you do an entire podcast about miracles?     To contact Liza or listen to her podcast: wondersandmiraclespodcast@gmail.com, Podcast: Wonders and Miracles - www.wondersandmiracles.com     As I re-listen to past podcasts I notice miracles. Personal miracles that go on in people’s lives as they create, as they go through tough times, as they heal. Today I wanted to share a couple clips - In episode 182, my interview with Richard Paul Evans, we talk about just a few of the miraculous events that happened as the book Christmas Box came together, but one of the sections I found most interesting was the way these little orbs of light followed him around as he spoke with people - Tune in for clips from that interview. The first year of the show we did a feature on the search for Annie Schmidt, daughter of Jon Schmidt from the popular group, The Piano Guys. I spoke with 3 people for this 3 part series, on of which was her mother. To say that miracles abounded in this search for her missing daughter is an understatement, but today I share one clip where Annie spoke to her mother after her death. (For the whole incredible story go to loveyourstorypodcast.com and listen to episodes 73-75. Tune in to hear miracles from this search. In episode 187, Deb Atella shares her own story of a lost loved one coming back to help her when she was hospitalized with a life and death hemorrhage. Tune in to hear her story. I think there are lots of kinds of miracles - Miracles we manifest with our faith, miracles that are just a hug from God - tender mercies, the miracles of angels around us, and serendipity moments. If you want to listen to more miracles, episode 10 of this podcast shared a whole pile of serendipitous and miraculous...]]>Episode 225: Wonders and Miracles - Interview Liza Lawrence Albert Einstein said, “There are only two ways to live your life: as though nothing is a miracle, or as though everything is a miracle.” Miracles - what are they? I suggest that miracles are things that we don’t yet know how to explain. They are events or happenings that go beyond what we can do for ourselves. We often beg for miracles, search for miracles, or manifest miracles by our faith. One thing I found really interesting about Christ’s ministry, is that before he did any miracle he said to the person, “Be it unto you according to your faith.” I find that fascinating. According to this, I draw the conclusion that first one must believe before miracles occur. Today I’ve invited Liza Laurence to the show - she is the host of the Wonders and Miracles podcast, to discuss her thoughts on miracles and some of the incredible ones she has heard, and then I’m going to share clips from 3 past podcasts, where my interviewees share some pretty miraculous experiences. Tune into the audio program to hear it straight from the people who are kind and brave enough to share their personal experiences. Do you believe God can do miracles? Do you believe you can create miracles because you believe strongly in a course of action? That belief in God, in ourselves, in the power of Universal law working for our good, despite our current limited understanding, seems to be crucial in the manifestation of miracles. Today’s discussion brings awareness to some unusual, even inexplicable things that create awe and wonder. Magic. Let’s welcome Liza Laurence, the host of the Wonders and Miracles podcast. Join us to hear Liza answer questions like: 1. What do you think is the definition of a miracle? 2. How many miracles have you shared with the guests on your podcast? How many episodes do you have up? 3. What are your top 3 miracles you were most awed in hearing? 4. Why do you do an entire podcast about miracles?     To contact Liza or listen to her podcast: wondersandmiraclespodcast@gmail.com, Podcast: Wonders and Miracles - www.wondersandmiracles.com     As I re-listen to past podcasts I notice miracles. Personal miracles that go on in people’s lives as they create, as they go through tough times, as they heal. Today I wanted to share a couple clips - In episode 182, my interview with Richard Paul Evans, we talk about just a few of the miraculous events that happened as the book Christmas Box came together, but one of the sections I found most interesting was the way these little orbs of light followed him around as he spoke with people - Tune in for clips from that interview. The first year of the show we did a feature on the search for Annie Schmidt, daughter of Jon Schmidt from the popular group, The Piano Guys. I spoke with 3 people for this 3 part series, on of which was her mother. To say that miracles abounded in this search for her missing daughter is an understatement, but today I share one clip where Annie spoke to her mother after her death. (For the whole incredible story go to loveyourstorypodcast.com and listen to episodes 73-75. Tune in to hear miracles from this search. In episode 187, Deb Atella shares her own story of a lost loved one coming back to help her when she was hospitalized with a life and death hemorrhage. Tune in to hear her story. I think there are lots of kinds of miracles - Miracles we manifest with our faith, miracles that are just a hug from God - tender mercies, the miracles of angels around us, and serendipity moments. If you want to listen to more miracles, episode 10 of this podcast shared a whole pile of serendipitous and miraculous experiences. Go back and get the goods! When you stop and focus on miracles, you can’t help but feel that God and the universe have your back. We begin to realize how little we truly understand, how much more there is to learn, and how abundant the universe is. If you have a miracle story you want to share, you can contact Liza at wondersandmiracles.com. This week, your challenge is to pay attention to the wonders in your life. To notice God in his abundance and generosity, train your eyes to see the magic and just sit with the idea that there is more than we understand and good things are afoot. Thanks for being here.]]>f855a6f9-b29f-4973-afa4-c0925685f67cWed, 10 Aug 2022 06:00:00 -070040:37falsefull225225Lori LeeEpisode 224: Practical Happiness - Interview with Pamela Gail JohnsonEpisode 224: Practical Happiness - Interview with Pamela Gail Johnson

   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Let me start with a story:

   A Native American story tells about how god gathered his animal advisers together to help him decide where to hide the Secret to a Happy Life from humans. 

   He first asked the Eagle, “Where shall I put it?” 

   The Eagle answered, “I shall hide it at the top of the highest mountain. Man will never find it there.” 

   God considered this but decided against it. “One day, Man will go there,” he said. 

   Next, he asked the Clam, “Where shall I put it, little Clam?” “I will hide it at the bottom of the deepest ocean,” the Clam answered.

   This seemed like a better idea, but the Lord hesitated again. 

   “Man will go there someday,” he said after some thought. Then the wise Owl stepped forward. “Though I regretfully cannot take it there myself,” he intoned, “perhaps you ought to hide the secret on the moon.” 

   After considering this, God finally came to the same conclu- sion as before: “No. There, too, Man shall go.” 

   After some period of reflection, the humble Opossum came forward. “Perhaps,” he said, so softly that he could barely be heard, “the secret should be hidden in the heart of Man.” There was an awed silence among the animals. 

   Finally, the Lord spoke: “Yes, cunning Opossum, that will be the last place Man will look.” 

   This story reminds us of something that we already know but are often reluctant to embrace: Our happiness is inside us. The challenge is knowing how to find it. 

   This story is shared from the introduction of the book, Practical Happiness, by Pamela Gail Johnson who is here today with me on the show. 

   Tune into the audio program where we are talking about personal happiness. The individual nature of it all, and what makes YOU happy. 

   Today on the show I have the founder of the Society of Happy People, and the author of Practical Happiness here to support us in intentionally creating our own happy spaces. 

   Pamela Gail Johnson has helped people understand, expand, and rethink their happiness mindset since 1998, when she found the Society of Happy People. As a mostly happy person, she asked herself, where are all the happy people? She decided they needed their own tribe. Are you one of her tribe, or would you like to be? Yes, of course, who doesn’t want to be part of the happiness people tribe.

   She has started 3 happiness holidays and her new book “Practical Happiness: Four principles to Improve Your Life.”

   Tune in to the audio program to hear my conversation with Pamela.

   As I’ve considered happiness in my own life - I have my own 4 ingredients to happiness: I have determined that happiness is comprised of 1. purpose - without purpose most people are unhappy and unmoored. And, 2. people - we need healthy personal relationships. 3. Gratitude, where we don’t ignore all the great blessings in our lives. Gratitude makes you feel like the universe has your back. 4. Fun - whatever is fun for you.

   Our brains are hardwired to quickly recognize and help us get away from things that can hurt us. This goes back to our caveman days, when we had to protect ourselves from gigantic, hairy, scary creatures and such. Our brains evolved to help us recognize danger and keep us safe. That’s why it’s always easier, and maybe even more natural, for us to see what’s wrong before we can see what’s right. Having a positive outlook usually requires a conscious effort until it becomes a habit or our go-to mindset. Practice this mindset. Look for what is going right.

   Your challenge for this week is to look for what is going right in your life right now. Take 5 minutes, sometime this week, and write a list of the things that make you smile. Then, I want you to put the list...]]>Episode 224: Practical Happiness - Interview with Pamela Gail Johnson

   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Let me start with a story:

   A Native American story tells about how god gathered his animal advisers together to help him decide where to hide the Secret to a Happy Life from humans. 

   He first asked the Eagle, “Where shall I put it?” 

   The Eagle answered, “I shall hide it at the top of the highest mountain. Man will never find it there.” 

   God considered this but decided against it. “One day, Man will go there,” he said. 

   Next, he asked the Clam, “Where shall I put it, little Clam?” “I will hide it at the bottom of the deepest ocean,” the Clam answered.

   This seemed like a better idea, but the Lord hesitated again. 

   “Man will go there someday,” he said after some thought. Then the wise Owl stepped forward. “Though I regretfully cannot take it there myself,” he intoned, “perhaps you ought to hide the secret on the moon.” 

   After considering this, God finally came to the same conclu- sion as before: “No. There, too, Man shall go.” 

   After some period of reflection, the humble Opossum came forward. “Perhaps,” he said, so softly that he could barely be heard, “the secret should be hidden in the heart of Man.” There was an awed silence among the animals. 

   Finally, the Lord spoke: “Yes, cunning Opossum, that will be the last place Man will look.” 

   This story reminds us of something that we already know but are often reluctant to embrace: Our happiness is inside us. The challenge is knowing how to find it. 

   This story is shared from the introduction of the book, Practical Happiness, by Pamela Gail Johnson who is here today with me on the show. 

   Tune into the audio program where we are talking about personal happiness. The individual nature of it all, and what makes YOU happy. 

   Today on the show I have the founder of the Society of Happy People, and the author of Practical Happiness here to support us in intentionally creating our own happy spaces. 

   Pamela Gail Johnson has helped people understand, expand, and rethink their happiness mindset since 1998, when she found the Society of Happy People. As a mostly happy person, she asked herself, where are all the happy people? She decided they needed their own tribe. Are you one of her tribe, or would you like to be? Yes, of course, who doesn’t want to be part of the happiness people tribe.

   She has started 3 happiness holidays and her new book “Practical Happiness: Four principles to Improve Your Life.”

   Tune in to the audio program to hear my conversation with Pamela.

   As I’ve considered happiness in my own life - I have my own 4 ingredients to happiness: I have determined that happiness is comprised of 1. purpose - without purpose most people are unhappy and unmoored. And, 2. people - we need healthy personal relationships. 3. Gratitude, where we don’t ignore all the great blessings in our lives. Gratitude makes you feel like the universe has your back. 4. Fun - whatever is fun for you.

   Our brains are hardwired to quickly recognize and help us get away from things that can hurt us. This goes back to our caveman days, when we had to protect ourselves from gigantic, hairy, scary creatures and such. Our brains evolved to help us recognize danger and keep us safe. That’s why it’s always easier, and maybe even more natural, for us to see what’s wrong before we can see what’s right. Having a positive outlook usually requires a conscious effort until it becomes a habit or our go-to mindset. Practice this mindset. Look for what is going right.

   Your challenge for this week is to look for what is going right in your life right now. Take 5 minutes, sometime this week, and write a list of the things that make you smile. Then, I want you to put the list someplace where you can see it regularly, and make sure that you’re including those happy things in your days. Look for the good, acknowledge the good, celebrate the good, enjoy the good. Roll around in the good!

   Please share this podcast with all the people in your life that could use a happy thought this morning. It’s easy to hit share on your podcast app and just text them a copy. Do a little good in the world by sharing the good.

   See you in two weeks for our next episode.

   ]]>40f76413-a1d2-4422-97f7-5f83d9426ac8Wed, 27 Jul 2022 06:00:00 -070036:54falsefull224224Lori LeeBitter or BetterEpisode 223: Bitter or Better

   
   

   Rumi said, “The wound is the place the light enters you.”

   
   

   I love this gorgeous truth, the poetry of it, the truth in it, the hope of it. 

   
   

   In our times of suffering and trial it is often hard to see the purpose. Instead it’s the “why me?’ It’s the visceral jerking away from pain, it’s the scream. But if we realize that this too shall pass, and in its wake will be strength and color we don’t yet understand, we can hold to hope. 

   
   

   Join me today for insight from a war hostage, a woman who was hit by a car and had her leg paralyzed, and from a man who recovered from a truly traumatic childhood into an engineer of lives, too see how the wound is the place that the light enters you, and the importance of trusting the process. 

   
   

   I want to start with 4 truths today:

   1. 
      
   3. You can’t get past the past until you accept it. 
   4. 
      
   5. 
      
   7. The process of growth is pushing past one wall after another, and often those walls are painful.
   8. 
      
   9. 
      
   11. Failure is feedback. It teaches us what not to do. 
   12. 
       
   14. Don’t stare at the error too long. Move past it, move along and use the information. 
   15. 
       
   16. 
       
   17. 
       
   19. Create a supportive story to go along with the learning: Which story is better?
   20. 
       

   
   

   
   

   A. I was treated unfairly and I feel shame about not being enough, or not succeeding as I expected, or God is unjust and cruel, or life is a bitch and then you die, or …

   
   

   B. I learned _____________. I trust there is a reason for this experience.

   
   

   I was listening to Oprah’s Interview, on her podcast Super Soul, with Elizabeth Gilbert. I have to say i was really impressed with Elizabeth and how centered she was. So calm, and the attitude was incredible. Let me tell you why - 

   
   

   Oprah was commenting on the the space in Elizabeth’s life - She’s the one that wrote “Eat, Love, Pray” - when she left her husband and got news that her best friend had a lethal cancer, and she discovered in that moment that she actually was in love with her best friend. She went to her bedside to walk the path of death with her, which was heart wrenching on multiple levels, but the mindset that Elizabeth had was just inspiring.  She said, “I came here to  live a life fully, so I will take all of it. I came here to do this, I want the whole ride.” She said, “Even in the worst moments I knew this is exactly where I’m supposed to be.”

   
   

   In the worst times she looks at, “What am I being asked to learn or do right now?” “Why is this being offered to me in this amount of pain?”

   
   

   Her willingness to feel deeply, to feel the whole range and depth of emotions that living provides for us was so brave. So advanced. 

   
   

   Most of us shy away from pain. We don’t want that range of emotions - I do for sure, but listening to her courage at facing all there was to get out of the experience of living, I was just impressed. I wanted to follow her around and become her disciple. 

   
   

   Something else I really got out of this was that she didn’t try to blame the hard times on God, or question her own worthiness because of her struggle, she simply accepted it as the process of living, and granted herself huge amounts of mercy. No shame in the process of —-I landed here in the wrong marriage or the wrong job, or here we go again, or ..… She says, Go to mercy for yourself, not to shame or judgement, and keep doing your best.

   
   

   She pointed out that we don’t have to know how to get through a thing, but you square your shoulders and you walk through it. You are good enough. YOU CAN DO...]]>Episode 223: Bitter or Better

   
   

   Rumi said, “The wound is the place the light enters you.”

   
   

   I love this gorgeous truth, the poetry of it, the truth in it, the hope of it. 

   
   

   In our times of suffering and trial it is often hard to see the purpose. Instead it’s the “why me?’ It’s the visceral jerking away from pain, it’s the scream. But if we realize that this too shall pass, and in its wake will be strength and color we don’t yet understand, we can hold to hope. 

   
   

   Join me today for insight from a war hostage, a woman who was hit by a car and had her leg paralyzed, and from a man who recovered from a truly traumatic childhood into an engineer of lives, too see how the wound is the place that the light enters you, and the importance of trusting the process. 

   
   

   I want to start with 4 truths today:

   1. 
      
   3. You can’t get past the past until you accept it. 
   4. 
      
   5. 
      
   7. The process of growth is pushing past one wall after another, and often those walls are painful.
   8. 
      
   9. 
      
   11. Failure is feedback. It teaches us what not to do. 
   12. 
       
   14. Don’t stare at the error too long. Move past it, move along and use the information. 
   15. 
       
   16. 
       
   17. 
       
   19. Create a supportive story to go along with the learning: Which story is better?
   20. 
       

   
   

   
   

   A. I was treated unfairly and I feel shame about not being enough, or not succeeding as I expected, or God is unjust and cruel, or life is a bitch and then you die, or …

   
   

   B. I learned _____________. I trust there is a reason for this experience.

   
   

   I was listening to Oprah’s Interview, on her podcast Super Soul, with Elizabeth Gilbert. I have to say i was really impressed with Elizabeth and how centered she was. So calm, and the attitude was incredible. Let me tell you why - 

   
   

   Oprah was commenting on the the space in Elizabeth’s life - She’s the one that wrote “Eat, Love, Pray” - when she left her husband and got news that her best friend had a lethal cancer, and she discovered in that moment that she actually was in love with her best friend. She went to her bedside to walk the path of death with her, which was heart wrenching on multiple levels, but the mindset that Elizabeth had was just inspiring.  She said, “I came here to  live a life fully, so I will take all of it. I came here to do this, I want the whole ride.” She said, “Even in the worst moments I knew this is exactly where I’m supposed to be.”

   
   

   In the worst times she looks at, “What am I being asked to learn or do right now?” “Why is this being offered to me in this amount of pain?”

   
   

   Her willingness to feel deeply, to feel the whole range and depth of emotions that living provides for us was so brave. So advanced. 

   
   

   Most of us shy away from pain. We don’t want that range of emotions - I do for sure, but listening to her courage at facing all there was to get out of the experience of living, I was just impressed. I wanted to follow her around and become her disciple. 

   
   

   Something else I really got out of this was that she didn’t try to blame the hard times on God, or question her own worthiness because of her struggle, she simply accepted it as the process of living, and granted herself huge amounts of mercy. No shame in the process of —-I landed here in the wrong marriage or the wrong job, or here we go again, or ..… She says, Go to mercy for yourself, not to shame or judgement, and keep doing your best.

   
   

   She pointed out that we don’t have to know how to get through a thing, but you square your shoulders and you walk through it. You are good enough. YOU CAN DO IT.

   
   

   I can’t say I have ever heard a braver approach to living - to be able to honestly embrace the whole emotional spectrum as an experiential learning space. 

   
   

   I’m going to share 3 clips from 3 people who have learned, through their own struggle, that the dark days hold gifts.

   
   

   Tune into the audio program to hear from:

   
   

   Episode 218 - Rusty Lindquist: Life Engineered

   
   

   Sister Susan H. Porter, First Councilor in the Primary General Presidency in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints said, "God’s love is not found in the circumstances of our lives but in His presence in our lives."

   
   

   It seems a common mindset to believe that if I am living right that bad things shouldn’t happen to me….my brother felt that deeply and it unmoored him when real life happened. 

   
   

   It’s clear that God lets us go through hard things, but that if we call on him and pay attention, if we allow him to walk with us there will be support, comfort, added strength, and a turning of the events of our lives for our best. God can orchestrate a great deal of good from what appears to be a pile of bad.

   1. 
      
   3. Episode 83 - Wendy Garrett - Life is Tough, but I am Tougher
   4. 
      

   
   

   
   

   Wendy Garrett was a gymnast. She was struck by an automobile and one of her legs was paralyzed. While her gymnastics career was over, this led her to a different life of running marathons all over the world. Why is she glad this happened to her?

   
   

    

   
   

   3. Episode 160 - Jo Marie Taylor: How being a hostage set her free.

   
   

   On 2 August 1990 at 2:00 am, local time, Iraq launched an invasion of Kuwait with four elite Iraqi Republican Guard Division and Iraqi Army Special Forces. The main thrust was conducted by the commandos deployed by helicopters and boats to attack Kuwait City while the other divisions seized the airports and two airbases. Kuwait didn’t stand for long and the Iraqi invasion quickly turned into a take-over. JoMarie Taylor, an American, was visiting Kuwait with her Kuwaiti husband found herself a hostage in the country, hiding and navigating the fear and daily threat of death; watching the destruction, rape, murder and mayhem of the invasion – all this challenged the way she thought about life, but what it taught her was to Trust the process. There is a purpose to our sufferings and sometimes it takes a long time to see, but when the tapestry is turned over, the design will be beautiful.

   
   

    

   
   

   From these three interviews I’m hearing - 1. Sometimes things need to happen the way they happen 2. We can’t always see the big picture but God can turn our struggles for our good, and believing in that can give us the ability to trust the process until we do see it. 3. Accepting our stories and choosing to let them make us better rather than bitter is a choice we are in control of.

   
   

   Thanks for being here today. Remember that you can find more wonderful episodes on loveyourstorypodcast.com, you can buy your Love Your Story-shirt or get your copy of LIFE - Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday on the website.

   
   

   I’d sure appreciate your reviews and hearing from you. See you in two weeks for the next episode.  

   ]]>199490ee-8f7f-428a-b8b2-b0fce17efbf7Wed, 13 Jul 2022 06:00:00 -070024:05falsefull223223Lori LeeWhat Energy Do You Source?Episode 222: Hero On A Mission, Part 2

   - With Jessica Burrell

   Donald Miller says, in his book,  Hero On A Mission, “Life is a beautiful experience and we get to participate in making it so….the idea that fate writes our story is a lie. We do not suffer fate, we partner with fate to write a story generated from our own God-given creativity and agency. And that story can be more than interesting, it can be meaningful.”

   Part 2 in this 2-part series puts Jessica Burrell and host Lori Lee in the hot seat to discuss when they have sourced all these energy types:

   Let’s have a little fun today and talk about what these roles look like in our own lives - Jessica and I will be the guinne pigs. As we do this we can start to be more aware of what energy we are sourcing in our lives, and with that awareness, create life stories with more intention and understanding. 

   Hero energy is where you take responsibility for your responses to life. A hero moves forward.

   When have you been sourcing Hero energy?

   Listen to the audio program to hear both responses.

   Victim energy is when you feel you have no way out. A victim gives up because they believe they are doomed. No one moves it forward. Life is hard, fate is against me.

   When have you sourced Victim energy?

   Listen to the audio program to hear both responses.

   Note - If the story is going to work, the hero must not source victim energy.

   If we find we are sourcing victim energy and feel shame, we move into the villain character who attacks the victim inside us. Don’t do that either. 

   When Donald brought that up, I thought that was super interesting, that we could be a villain to ourselves.

   Let’s talk about the villain: We want to make sure we/ the hero doesn’t source villain energy. 

   How is the hero responding to their challenge? When they are insulted, how do they react, when they feel all is lost, do they lash out like a villain?

   When have you sourced Villain energy in your life?

   Listen to the audio program to hear both responses.

   The story is about the transformation of the hero, the guide is the most respected and wise in the story - like Yoda for Luke, or Haimich for Katniss in the Hunger Games, or Gandolf in Lord of the Rings. When we are the guide - we sacrifice ourselves for another. 

   When have you sourced guide energy?

   Listen to the audio program to hear both responses.

   To buy Hero On A Mission:

   https://www.amazon.com/Hero-Mission-Path-Meaningful-Life/dp/B09128GM6X/ref=sr_1_1?crid=23XV87SEK24U5&keywords=Hero+on+a+mission&qid=1653058903&sprefix=hero+on+a+missio%2Caps%2C214&sr=8-1

   To contact Jessica Burrell:

   hello@jessicaburrell.com

   Life forces us to live a story. It’s not a choice. We can moan and rage and create a victim or villain story, OR we can create a path of transformation in our life. A path to meaning. A path to transformation.

   So much of this is about our identity and who we believe we are. Do we believe we are helpless (victim)? Do we believe other people are small (villain)? Do we believe we are in control and can transform and change - growth mindset - hero energy? Are we willing to guide, with wisdom and selflessness, when needed? 

   In stories, pain is the only way that heroes transform and become the better versions of themselves. 

   Pain is the force that transforms us. There is a redemptive perspective of pain. We must take the thing that hurt us and shape it into an inner strength. Pick up the pain and turn it into something useful. Victims can heal into heroes and heroes can strengthen into guides.

   Humans are designed to change. Healthy people learn from their mistakes. That’s a lot of hope. We hope you've learned some...]]>Episode 222: Hero On A Mission, Part 2

   - With Jessica Burrell

   Donald Miller says, in his book,  Hero On A Mission, “Life is a beautiful experience and we get to participate in making it so….the idea that fate writes our story is a lie. We do not suffer fate, we partner with fate to write a story generated from our own God-given creativity and agency. And that story can be more than interesting, it can be meaningful.”

   Part 2 in this 2-part series puts Jessica Burrell and host Lori Lee in the hot seat to discuss when they have sourced all these energy types:

   Let’s have a little fun today and talk about what these roles look like in our own lives - Jessica and I will be the guinne pigs. As we do this we can start to be more aware of what energy we are sourcing in our lives, and with that awareness, create life stories with more intention and understanding. 

   Hero energy is where you take responsibility for your responses to life. A hero moves forward.

   When have you been sourcing Hero energy?

   Listen to the audio program to hear both responses.

   Victim energy is when you feel you have no way out. A victim gives up because they believe they are doomed. No one moves it forward. Life is hard, fate is against me.

   When have you sourced Victim energy?

   Listen to the audio program to hear both responses.

   Note - If the story is going to work, the hero must not source victim energy.

   If we find we are sourcing victim energy and feel shame, we move into the villain character who attacks the victim inside us. Don’t do that either. 

   When Donald brought that up, I thought that was super interesting, that we could be a villain to ourselves.

   Let’s talk about the villain: We want to make sure we/ the hero doesn’t source villain energy. 

   How is the hero responding to their challenge? When they are insulted, how do they react, when they feel all is lost, do they lash out like a villain?

   When have you sourced Villain energy in your life?

   Listen to the audio program to hear both responses.

   The story is about the transformation of the hero, the guide is the most respected and wise in the story - like Yoda for Luke, or Haimich for Katniss in the Hunger Games, or Gandolf in Lord of the Rings. When we are the guide - we sacrifice ourselves for another. 

   When have you sourced guide energy?

   Listen to the audio program to hear both responses.

   To buy Hero On A Mission:

   https://www.amazon.com/Hero-Mission-Path-Meaningful-Life/dp/B09128GM6X/ref=sr_1_1?crid=23XV87SEK24U5&keywords=Hero+on+a+mission&qid=1653058903&sprefix=hero+on+a+missio%2Caps%2C214&sr=8-1

   To contact Jessica Burrell:

   hello@jessicaburrell.com

   Life forces us to live a story. It’s not a choice. We can moan and rage and create a victim or villain story, OR we can create a path of transformation in our life. A path to meaning. A path to transformation.

   So much of this is about our identity and who we believe we are. Do we believe we are helpless (victim)? Do we believe other people are small (villain)? Do we believe we are in control and can transform and change - growth mindset - hero energy? Are we willing to guide, with wisdom and selflessness, when needed? 

   In stories, pain is the only way that heroes transform and become the better versions of themselves. 

   Pain is the force that transforms us. There is a redemptive perspective of pain. We must take the thing that hurt us and shape it into an inner strength. Pick up the pain and turn it into something useful. Victims can heal into heroes and heroes can strengthen into guides.

   Humans are designed to change. Healthy people learn from their mistakes. That’s a lot of hope. We hope you've learned some things about yourself, about your story, and about the possibility for engaging with the energy you want, on purpose.

   Thanks for being here. Share this episode with your friends and family

   *Additional music by Kevin MacLeod

   ]]>06fb0f29-9c69-4a51-abee-5f80e9cea6c7Wed, 29 Jun 2022 06:00:00 -070027:39falsefull222222Hero energy, villain energy, victim energy, or guide energy. What do they look like? Hero On A Mission, by Donald Miller, starts our discussion on what each looks like.Lori LeeEpisode 221: Hero on a Mission, Part 1 - with Jessica BurrellEpisode 221: Hero on a Mission, Part 1 - with Jessica Burrell

   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast! Today’s episode is a double whammy of goodness because we are going to be discussing some really fun ideas for moving our lives forward, from Donald Miller’s book - Hero on a Mission, and we’re doing it with Jessica Burrell, the owner of Amplify Your Vision, the fabulous transformational coach.

   Do you want your life story to be as meaningful as possible? Are you willing to take responsibility for your own life story? 

   The good life stories take work. Our lives have a beginning, middle and end - like a story. We play many roles - friends, husband, wife, son, daughter, teacher, learner etc. - we are multi-dimensional characters. But within our story there are times we also play the role of the villian, the victim, the hero and hopefully the guide.

   But before we go there, we first need to talk about our own power and responsibility. This brings us to - Who is writing your story? Do you think fate is responsible for where you are, for how your story turns out? Do you believe others, who act upon you, determine the storyline? Is it God that writes our story? As Donald Miller says in his book, if it’s fate or God they are doing a very unfair job.

   In Hero on a Mission, Donald Miller says, “What if God has created the scene - the sunset, the sunrise, the ocean, the mountains. He has set the scene for US to create within. The broken nature of life is a fact. But, we have been given a pen to write our way within it. 

   It felt right when he said, God isn’t writing your story, Fate isn’t writing your story, there has rather, been a space created for you to pick up the pen and write the meaning into your own story. We get to decide if we use colorful sparkle pens, we get to decide what we focus on, who we want to become, how WE choose to deal with the natural tragedies that arise from a world full of crazy. This is the gift of agency. You alone have the responsibility to shape your life into something meaningful. To learn from the setbacks and pain, to create with intention.

   Tune in to the audio program for an interesting discussion about what it looks like when we play the hero, victim, villain and the guide. What energy are you sourcing?

   Let’s start with a little definition and explanation:

   Heroes are victims going through the process of transformation.

   Victims believe they are buffeted by circumstances and they have no power in their own lives. They often give up, surrender to fate, believe they are doomed.

   The Villain makes others small. They don’t seek transformation, they seek revenge.

   The Guide helps the hero. The hero does not transform alone - we all have help. Lots of help. The hero doesn’t know how to do it all, because they are in the process of transformation. Here’s the cool part…the pain transforms a hero into a guide for others.

   Donald Miller says, in the book, “Life is a beautiful experience and we get to participate in making it so….the idea that fate writes our story is a lie. We do not suffer fate, we partner with fate to write a story generated from our own God-given creativity and agency. And that story can be more than interesting, it can be meaningful.”

   Join us for Part 2 as we discuss our personal times of sourcing the hero, villain, victim and guide energy.

   To buy the book:

   https://www.amazon.com/Hero-Mission-Path-Meaningful-Life/dp/B09128GM6X/ref=sr_1_1?crid=VH6LCREL2CE&keywords=Hero+on+a+Mission&qid=1653005991&sprefix=hero+on+a+mission%2Caps%2C275&sr=8-1

   See you in two weeks.

   ]]>Episode 221: Hero on a Mission, Part 1 - with Jessica Burrell

   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast! Today’s episode is a double whammy of goodness because we are going to be discussing some really fun ideas for moving our lives forward, from Donald Miller’s book - Hero on a Mission, and we’re doing it with Jessica Burrell, the owner of Amplify Your Vision, the fabulous transformational coach.

   Do you want your life story to be as meaningful as possible? Are you willing to take responsibility for your own life story? 

   The good life stories take work. Our lives have a beginning, middle and end - like a story. We play many roles - friends, husband, wife, son, daughter, teacher, learner etc. - we are multi-dimensional characters. But within our story there are times we also play the role of the villian, the victim, the hero and hopefully the guide.

   But before we go there, we first need to talk about our own power and responsibility. This brings us to - Who is writing your story? Do you think fate is responsible for where you are, for how your story turns out? Do you believe others, who act upon you, determine the storyline? Is it God that writes our story? As Donald Miller says in his book, if it’s fate or God they are doing a very unfair job.

   In Hero on a Mission, Donald Miller says, “What if God has created the scene - the sunset, the sunrise, the ocean, the mountains. He has set the scene for US to create within. The broken nature of life is a fact. But, we have been given a pen to write our way within it. 

   It felt right when he said, God isn’t writing your story, Fate isn’t writing your story, there has rather, been a space created for you to pick up the pen and write the meaning into your own story. We get to decide if we use colorful sparkle pens, we get to decide what we focus on, who we want to become, how WE choose to deal with the natural tragedies that arise from a world full of crazy. This is the gift of agency. You alone have the responsibility to shape your life into something meaningful. To learn from the setbacks and pain, to create with intention.

   Tune in to the audio program for an interesting discussion about what it looks like when we play the hero, victim, villain and the guide. What energy are you sourcing?

   Let’s start with a little definition and explanation:

   Heroes are victims going through the process of transformation.

   Victims believe they are buffeted by circumstances and they have no power in their own lives. They often give up, surrender to fate, believe they are doomed.

   The Villain makes others small. They don’t seek transformation, they seek revenge.

   The Guide helps the hero. The hero does not transform alone - we all have help. Lots of help. The hero doesn’t know how to do it all, because they are in the process of transformation. Here’s the cool part…the pain transforms a hero into a guide for others.

   Donald Miller says, in the book, “Life is a beautiful experience and we get to participate in making it so….the idea that fate writes our story is a lie. We do not suffer fate, we partner with fate to write a story generated from our own God-given creativity and agency. And that story can be more than interesting, it can be meaningful.”

   Join us for Part 2 as we discuss our personal times of sourcing the hero, villain, victim and guide energy.

   To buy the book:

   https://www.amazon.com/Hero-Mission-Path-Meaningful-Life/dp/B09128GM6X/ref=sr_1_1?crid=VH6LCREL2CE&keywords=Hero+on+a+Mission&qid=1653005991&sprefix=hero+on+a+mission%2Caps%2C275&sr=8-1

   See you in two weeks.

   ]]>b749fdd7-16fe-45d2-8b22-85530c4cdd7eWed, 15 Jun 2022 06:00:00 -070026:12falsefull221221Lori LeeEpisode 220: Death with a Little "d" - Interview Margaret MeloniEpisode 220: Death with a Little "d" - Interview Margaret Meloni

   When a marriage fails, a friendship terminates, we find new wrinkles and new sagging skin, we lose a job or lose a beloved pet, the facts of impermanence stare, unblinking, at us. While logically we can acknowledge that impermanence is a matter of fact, a fact of life, it is also something we fear. We fear losing our youth, people and pets we love, a job that helps us define who we are, a way of life, wealth, etc. With that fear comes suffering. Learning to let go….that’s what we are talking about today.

   Today’s episode is about Death with a little d. I’ve called in our death specialist, Margaret Meloni, but we aren’t talking about dealing with the death of our loved ones or ourselves today, more about the death of less crucial things. And we are having this discussion because a section of the road to enlightenment is living with more peace and less fear, and impermanence is one of those things we get to understand better.

   Tune in for what this looks like in real life and maybe come away with a new coping skill.

   Margaret Meloni is used to talking about death. In fact, her second book recently hit the book stands, Sitting With Death: Buddhist Insights to Help You Face Your Fears and Live a Peaceful Life. Her first book, Carpooling with Death, was highlighted in episode 146 of the Love Your Story podcast. But I don’t want to talk about Death with a big D today. Refer back to that episode for that discussion. 

   Today I want to talk about impermanence. Margaret’s second season on her podcast, Death Dhamma, she is focusing on death with a little d. - the impermanence of all things and with the ability to accept that impermanence we increase the ability to create less painful life stories. So we’ll learn how to navigate the inevitability of change today.

   In the audio program we'll discuss ideas like:

   Can you tell us a little about how you got into the study of death?

   What is death with a little “d”?

   Let’s talk about the idea of impermanence. How do you define it? What does it look like in our lives? How do we accept it?

   Things that we can expect to be impermanent: relationships, health, jobs, etc. What would you add to this list?

   Shelley Knight said, “We are all grieving something. When we talk about grief people think it’s the death of a loved one and it’s not just that – that’s bereavement. Grief is the loss of anything with which you have an emotional connection. It could be your health, a relationship, a dream, your self-confidence, or something else. We don’t need to hide it. We need to normalize it.”

   In your discussions on your podcast regarding this topic - what insight/story has stuck with you the most?

   Let’s talk about: pain+resistance = suffering. Does the acceptance of impermanence help us with resistance and thus reduce our suffering? There are lots of real feelings to deal with when we lose something important to us. 

   What do you think is the most helpful Buddhist teaching regarding impermanence and dealing with it?

   In your blog post - Master Improvisation, Master Impermanence, you talk about the rules of good improv. 

   “All you need to know is that there will be death, in that awareness there will be peace.” - Margaret Meloni

   To Contact Margaret:

   Social Media

   https://twitter.com/MargaretMeloni

   https://www.linkedin.com/in/margaretmeloni/

   https://www.facebook.com/DeathDhamma

   Episode 220: Death with a Little "d" - Interview Margaret Meloni

   When a marriage fails, a friendship terminates, we find new wrinkles and new sagging skin, we lose a job or lose a beloved pet, the facts of impermanence stare, unblinking, at us. While logically we can acknowledge that impermanence is a matter of fact, a fact of life, it is also something we fear. We fear losing our youth, people and pets we love, a job that helps us define who we are, a way of life, wealth, etc. With that fear comes suffering. Learning to let go….that’s what we are talking about today.

   Today’s episode is about Death with a little d. I’ve called in our death specialist, Margaret Meloni, but we aren’t talking about dealing with the death of our loved ones or ourselves today, more about the death of less crucial things. And we are having this discussion because a section of the road to enlightenment is living with more peace and less fear, and impermanence is one of those things we get to understand better.

   Tune in for what this looks like in real life and maybe come away with a new coping skill.

   Margaret Meloni is used to talking about death. In fact, her second book recently hit the book stands, Sitting With Death: Buddhist Insights to Help You Face Your Fears and Live a Peaceful Life. Her first book, Carpooling with Death, was highlighted in episode 146 of the Love Your Story podcast. But I don’t want to talk about Death with a big D today. Refer back to that episode for that discussion. 

   Today I want to talk about impermanence. Margaret’s second season on her podcast, Death Dhamma, she is focusing on death with a little d. - the impermanence of all things and with the ability to accept that impermanence we increase the ability to create less painful life stories. So we’ll learn how to navigate the inevitability of change today.

   In the audio program we'll discuss ideas like:

   Can you tell us a little about how you got into the study of death?

   What is death with a little “d”?

   Let’s talk about the idea of impermanence. How do you define it? What does it look like in our lives? How do we accept it?

   Things that we can expect to be impermanent: relationships, health, jobs, etc. What would you add to this list?

   Shelley Knight said, “We are all grieving something. When we talk about grief people think it’s the death of a loved one and it’s not just that – that’s bereavement. Grief is the loss of anything with which you have an emotional connection. It could be your health, a relationship, a dream, your self-confidence, or something else. We don’t need to hide it. We need to normalize it.”

   In your discussions on your podcast regarding this topic - what insight/story has stuck with you the most?

   Let’s talk about: pain+resistance = suffering. Does the acceptance of impermanence help us with resistance and thus reduce our suffering? There are lots of real feelings to deal with when we lose something important to us. 

   What do you think is the most helpful Buddhist teaching regarding impermanence and dealing with it?

   In your blog post - Master Improvisation, Master Impermanence, you talk about the rules of good improv. 

   “All you need to know is that there will be death, in that awareness there will be peace.” - Margaret Meloni

   To Contact Margaret:

   Social Media

   https://twitter.com/MargaretMeloni

   https://www.linkedin.com/in/margaretmeloni/

   https://www.facebook.com/DeathDhamma

   https://www.facebook.com/groups/962871121024043

   Website:

   https://www.margaretmeloni.com/

   What are you grieving the loss of in your life. Maybe it’s as simple as the loss of an expectation - you expected a marriage to be happily ever after, you expected a friend to be loyal, you expected a party you threw to turn out differently. Your challenge this week is to consider the importance of things as a whole in your life. Take a deep breath and accept that inevitability. Sit with it for as long as you need, and when you are ready, stand up and live more fully into those things you love because they won’t be around forever. Life is change.

   Who loves this podcast? Will you please scroll down your app and leave us a review. Tell us your favorite thing about the show.

   Have a great 2 weeks. 

   ]]>d142a5b7-bee3-46d1-bb69-c63344cf27b8Wed, 01 Jun 2022 06:00:00 -070034:02falsefull220220Lori LeeEpisode 219: Come Off Conqueror - Interview Bonnie RandallEpisode 219: Come Off Conqueror - Interview Bonnie Randall Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. "You can't go back and change the beginning of your story... but you can start where you are today and change your ending" On today’s show we are talking about coming of conqueror. What does that mean? To conquer something is to prevail over it; to overcome and take control of. Often times we are held hostage by events in our pasts that have traumatized us. We are cripple by the abuses of others, by shame, even by our own destructive choices. We are talking about events we have not been able to heal from. Events in our stories that have us stuck, like a knight in a mud bog - forward progress inhibited, wallowing in the dirt and muck we don’t know how to break free from. Tune into the audio program for my interview with Bonnie Randal, creator the YouTube channel Come off Conqueror. Ms. Randall is a champion of the down-trodden. She has a 20-year career in marketing at all levels from Fortune 500 to non-profit and charity work. Her charity work has led to her meeting many trauma survivors, and her own experience with date rape has created understanding bonds with these survivors and has sparked a passion for helping them heal. Her mission is to help victims of abuse, primarily women and children, conquer their trauma and live healthy, fulfilling lives. She believes that God is the key, and so she started a Youtube channel, Come Off Conqueror, where survivors share stories of healing, as well as insights from other therapists, healers, authors and practitioners to help women take back their power, heal, and step into their true identities. "It is not possible for you to sink lower than the infinite life of Christ's Atonement." - Elder Jeffrey R. Holland In today's interview I talk with Bonnie about:

   1. Her story.
   2. How did you heal? How long did it take?
   3. There are lots of treatment programs out there. What is your philosophy for healing?
   4. I’d love to hear some inspiring stories from the women you’ve worked with. What have you learned from them?
   5. What do we all need to know - most of all - about how to heal?
   6. What exactly do you offer people? Where can people find you to share stories with you?

   
     Contact information for Bonnie Randall https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC7v_-x8uvv89jW7pVfZC6cg https://www.facebook.com/groups/817834172106176   I don’t know why so many terrible things happen in the world - bad things to good people. But what I do know is that trauma changes us. We know more, we sometimes come to understand things we never wanted to understand. Sometimes it breaks our souls, our minds and our bodies. This is why healing becomes so important. Like our bodies our souls can be healed. It’s not fast, and it needs proper care and time, and help. But healing is hope. Healing is essential to stepping out of the dark, sticky bog in which trauma can throw us. Healing is part of the process of being able to live again. Your challenge this week is to consider what trauma in your past may still have a negative hold on you - one that holds you back because you don’t understand how to get past it. Take this acknowledgement into your meditations and your prayers and ask for the way of healing to open to you. Keep this intention in your heart this week. See what doors open. Please share this episode link with anyone you think it would bless. Have a great week creating your life intentionally. See you in two weeks.]]>Episode 219: Come Off Conqueror - Interview Bonnie Randall Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. "You can't go back and change the beginning of your story... but you can start where you are today and change your ending" On today’s show we are talking about coming of conqueror. What does that mean? To conquer something is to prevail over it; to overcome and take control of. Often times we are held hostage by events in our pasts that have traumatized us. We are cripple by the abuses of others, by shame, even by our own destructive choices. We are talking about events we have not been able to heal from. Events in our stories that have us stuck, like a knight in a mud bog - forward progress inhibited, wallowing in the dirt and muck we don’t know how to break free from. Tune into the audio program for my interview with Bonnie Randal, creator the YouTube channel Come off Conqueror. Ms. Randall is a champion of the down-trodden. She has a 20-year career in marketing at all levels from Fortune 500 to non-profit and charity work. Her charity work has led to her meeting many trauma survivors, and her own experience with date rape has created understanding bonds with these survivors and has sparked a passion for helping them heal. Her mission is to help victims of abuse, primarily women and children, conquer their trauma and live healthy, fulfilling lives. She believes that God is the key, and so she started a Youtube channel, Come Off Conqueror, where survivors share stories of healing, as well as insights from other therapists, healers, authors and practitioners to help women take back their power, heal, and step into their true identities. "It is not possible for you to sink lower than the infinite life of Christ's Atonement." - Elder Jeffrey R. Holland In today's interview I talk with Bonnie about:

   1. Her story.
   2. How did you heal? How long did it take?
   3. There are lots of treatment programs out there. What is your philosophy for healing?
   4. I’d love to hear some inspiring stories from the women you’ve worked with. What have you learned from them?
   5. What do we all need to know - most of all - about how to heal?
   6. What exactly do you offer people? Where can people find you to share stories with you?

   
     Contact information for Bonnie Randall https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC7v_-x8uvv89jW7pVfZC6cg https://www.facebook.com/groups/817834172106176   I don’t know why so many terrible things happen in the world - bad things to good people. But what I do know is that trauma changes us. We know more, we sometimes come to understand things we never wanted to understand. Sometimes it breaks our souls, our minds and our bodies. This is why healing becomes so important. Like our bodies our souls can be healed. It’s not fast, and it needs proper care and time, and help. But healing is hope. Healing is essential to stepping out of the dark, sticky bog in which trauma can throw us. Healing is part of the process of being able to live again. Your challenge this week is to consider what trauma in your past may still have a negative hold on you - one that holds you back because you don’t understand how to get past it. Take this acknowledgement into your meditations and your prayers and ask for the way of healing to open to you. Keep this intention in your heart this week. See what doors open. Please share this episode link with anyone you think it would bless. Have a great week creating your life intentionally. See you in two weeks.]]>3c5aae52-049e-4256-9153-d4375640290aWed, 18 May 2022 06:00:00 -070049:47falsefull219219Lori LeeEpisode 218: Life Engineered - Interview Rusty LindquistEpisode 218: Life Engineered- Interview Rusty Lindquist Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast! When we talk about living your life story with intention, we are essentially saying, let’s engineer our lives. Let’s look at what we want and purposefully create thought patterns and habits to be who we want to be. Rusty Lindquist was interviewed in the early years of the podcast - episode 21 - Remember that because you’re going to want to go back and listen to his story if you haven’t heard it yet - His father thought he was being called on by God to sacrifice his son and that led Rusty and his mother to run for their lives. This man lived alone, hiding out in a forest as a 10 year-old. He knows how to go from trauma to success, so he’s got cred. Rusty founded Life Engineering to help individuals, parents, leaders, and organizations cut through everything and achieve excellence. Life Engineering provides the tools and the training, the motivation and the methodology, an entire system designed to help people move beyond where they have been, to go farther than they thought they could… to achieve more, to do more, to become more. It’s about more than just short-term success. It’s the disciplined pursuit of excellence.   Tune into the audio program for my discussion with Rusty Lindquist and to get a real look at what life engineering looks like and answers to these questions: Let’s start with your story - what was the path to creating Life Engineering? What are the main components of engineering a life? What activates and unleashes our energy? - Our potential… What about apathy? What happens when you feel like the effort isn’t worth the outcome? Let’s talk about human potential and science. What do you scientifically know about how to access human potential? What motivates us?   To contact Rusty: rusty@lifeengineering.com www.lifeengineering.com Learn to sustain energy and begin your purposeful journey - YouTube The Greatest Asset On Earth - YouTube Leadership Development and Live Training – Life Engineering   Time, talent, energy….understanding how to activate and sustainably employ that energy so you can reach the outcomes you want. Anything worth having is going to take work. I can tell you now, having a few decades of living under my belt, that time just keeps rolling on. Before you know it another 10 years have passed, and what have you done? Did you do, experience, become what you wanted? If not, now is the time to use the resources, like what Rusty has talked about, like what I talk about on the show, the 21 Challenges, life coaches, etc. to help you engineer what you want. I love that we live in an age where we have so many resources for our success. So many that it’s sometimes overwhelming - so many podcasts, so many books, so many life coaches, so many programs, but all it takes is one good one. Start somewhere if you need support and greater understanding of what it looks like to go a little further than you’ve gone in the past. Image that satisfied feeling a year from now, when you’ve created something you really feel great about. Or lived in an active way that created opportunities for you. Your challenge this week is just to think about what you want in your life, and then consider what type of engineering could help you get it. Thanks for being here. Check out www.loveyourstorypodcast.com for links to buy...]]>Episode 218: Life Engineered- Interview Rusty Lindquist Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast! When we talk about living your life story with intention, we are essentially saying, let’s engineer our lives. Let’s look at what we want and purposefully create thought patterns and habits to be who we want to be. Rusty Lindquist was interviewed in the early years of the podcast - episode 21 - Remember that because you’re going to want to go back and listen to his story if you haven’t heard it yet - His father thought he was being called on by God to sacrifice his son and that led Rusty and his mother to run for their lives. This man lived alone, hiding out in a forest as a 10 year-old. He knows how to go from trauma to success, so he’s got cred. Rusty founded Life Engineering to help individuals, parents, leaders, and organizations cut through everything and achieve excellence. Life Engineering provides the tools and the training, the motivation and the methodology, an entire system designed to help people move beyond where they have been, to go farther than they thought they could… to achieve more, to do more, to become more. It’s about more than just short-term success. It’s the disciplined pursuit of excellence.   Tune into the audio program for my discussion with Rusty Lindquist and to get a real look at what life engineering looks like and answers to these questions: Let’s start with your story - what was the path to creating Life Engineering? What are the main components of engineering a life? What activates and unleashes our energy? - Our potential… What about apathy? What happens when you feel like the effort isn’t worth the outcome? Let’s talk about human potential and science. What do you scientifically know about how to access human potential? What motivates us?   To contact Rusty: rusty@lifeengineering.com www.lifeengineering.com Learn to sustain energy and begin your purposeful journey - YouTube The Greatest Asset On Earth - YouTube Leadership Development and Live Training – Life Engineering   Time, talent, energy….understanding how to activate and sustainably employ that energy so you can reach the outcomes you want. Anything worth having is going to take work. I can tell you now, having a few decades of living under my belt, that time just keeps rolling on. Before you know it another 10 years have passed, and what have you done? Did you do, experience, become what you wanted? If not, now is the time to use the resources, like what Rusty has talked about, like what I talk about on the show, the 21 Challenges, life coaches, etc. to help you engineer what you want. I love that we live in an age where we have so many resources for our success. So many that it’s sometimes overwhelming - so many podcasts, so many books, so many life coaches, so many programs, but all it takes is one good one. Start somewhere if you need support and greater understanding of what it looks like to go a little further than you’ve gone in the past. Image that satisfied feeling a year from now, when you’ve created something you really feel great about. Or lived in an active way that created opportunities for you. Your challenge this week is just to think about what you want in your life, and then consider what type of engineering could help you get it. Thanks for being here. Check out www.loveyourstorypodcast.com for links to buy Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday, to get the show notes with Rusty’s contact information, to hear all the past 200+ episodes and all the great stories in each one.

   Have a great 2 weeks creating your best life - every step counts.

   ]]>a2ca9961-9909-4c29-a677-9e00e8202a4dWed, 04 May 2022 06:00:00 -070043:34falsefull218218Lori LeeEpisode 217: What's the Most Important Story in the World? Interview Mary Alice ArthurEpisode 217: What's the Most Important Story in the World? Interview Mary Alice Arthur

   For all my Love Your Story listeners, you know the premise of the podcast is that we are living our story and while our backstories may be messy, coming to love and accept them is crucial to self-love and acceptance and to moving forward in a healthy way. We also constantly talk about the fact that since our lives are an unfolding story, and we have agency and intellect, we can, if we choose, control that story, we can shift directions at any time. We understand that the stories we tell ourselves determine what we believe, how we see the world, how we see ourselves - and those are powerful things, because they, in turn, determine our very lives. I have a question - do you get this in theory, or do you REALLY get it and put it into action?

   Stay tuned — On today's show I have Mary Alice Arthur, a woman who has spent her life as a story activist helping people to understand this, and to empower them to use this power that we all have. She is the author of 365 Alive - Find your voice, Claim your Story. Live Your Brilliant Life. And she has travelled the world goin gin and out of organizations, systems and cultures working with groups and individuals helping them realize that story is the secret superpower of humanity.

   Back to my question - do you REALLY get the super power you have within the story you are living? Do you use that super power with intention? Maybe you’re just starting to understand it. …. Well, if you really get it, then you begin to use your power to track the stories you are telling yourself. To determine which stories are lifting you, and which ones are holding you down. Then, with that information, you start to purposefully and intelligently make room for the stories that support and empower you. You become aware of the damage stories can have as well, and you realize you can purposefully extract the destruction, you don't have to make space for it, or feed it. So….Today’s show is particularly exciting because we have a guest who is going to give us more know-how, more insight, and actual things we can do to understand and embrace this power that lies within our mind and spirit, so we can create our best life story with intention.

   Mary Alice, welcome to the show!! 

   I want to start with a quote from you, “The stories you tell yourself influence whether you feel powerless or powerful, color how you define success and happiness, underpin eery action you take. When you wake up to the stories at work in for life you suddenly step into the position of power. Story stops being what defines you and becomes your ally.”

   We want to make story our ally. We want to more fully understand the position of power we have with story. 

   How do you help people understand the subjectiveness of story, and the power the stories we tell ourselves have in how our lives unfold?

   When I read the Harry Potter books I would think, man, why doesn’t Harry study harder? If you knew you had that kind of power, why wouldn’t you figure out how to use it? Really practice… but in real life we do have power - amazing power that few of us take the time and effort to tap in to. 

   Tune into the audio program to hear our conversation about the most important story in the world and how we can use it to support ourselves.

   To contact Mary Alice:

   365live.org

   www.getsoaring.com

   mary-alice@getsoaring.com

   We’ve already had a lot to think about in this episode, so I’ll just end with the challenge - get clear on your own story. Pinpoint one area of your life that isn’t working for you as well as you’d like and take an honest look around the stories you are telling yourself, the stories others are creating for you, and determine how you could shift that story, look at it from a different...]]>Episode 217: What's the Most Important Story in the World? Interview Mary Alice Arthur

   For all my Love Your Story listeners, you know the premise of the podcast is that we are living our story and while our backstories may be messy, coming to love and accept them is crucial to self-love and acceptance and to moving forward in a healthy way. We also constantly talk about the fact that since our lives are an unfolding story, and we have agency and intellect, we can, if we choose, control that story, we can shift directions at any time. We understand that the stories we tell ourselves determine what we believe, how we see the world, how we see ourselves - and those are powerful things, because they, in turn, determine our very lives. I have a question - do you get this in theory, or do you REALLY get it and put it into action?

   Stay tuned — On today's show I have Mary Alice Arthur, a woman who has spent her life as a story activist helping people to understand this, and to empower them to use this power that we all have. She is the author of 365 Alive - Find your voice, Claim your Story. Live Your Brilliant Life. And she has travelled the world goin gin and out of organizations, systems and cultures working with groups and individuals helping them realize that story is the secret superpower of humanity.

   Back to my question - do you REALLY get the super power you have within the story you are living? Do you use that super power with intention? Maybe you’re just starting to understand it. …. Well, if you really get it, then you begin to use your power to track the stories you are telling yourself. To determine which stories are lifting you, and which ones are holding you down. Then, with that information, you start to purposefully and intelligently make room for the stories that support and empower you. You become aware of the damage stories can have as well, and you realize you can purposefully extract the destruction, you don't have to make space for it, or feed it. So….Today’s show is particularly exciting because we have a guest who is going to give us more know-how, more insight, and actual things we can do to understand and embrace this power that lies within our mind and spirit, so we can create our best life story with intention.

   Mary Alice, welcome to the show!! 

   I want to start with a quote from you, “The stories you tell yourself influence whether you feel powerless or powerful, color how you define success and happiness, underpin eery action you take. When you wake up to the stories at work in for life you suddenly step into the position of power. Story stops being what defines you and becomes your ally.”

   We want to make story our ally. We want to more fully understand the position of power we have with story. 

   How do you help people understand the subjectiveness of story, and the power the stories we tell ourselves have in how our lives unfold?

   When I read the Harry Potter books I would think, man, why doesn’t Harry study harder? If you knew you had that kind of power, why wouldn’t you figure out how to use it? Really practice… but in real life we do have power - amazing power that few of us take the time and effort to tap in to. 

   Tune into the audio program to hear our conversation about the most important story in the world and how we can use it to support ourselves.

   To contact Mary Alice:

   365live.org

   www.getsoaring.com

   mary-alice@getsoaring.com

   We’ve already had a lot to think about in this episode, so I’ll just end with the challenge - get clear on your own story. Pinpoint one area of your life that isn’t working for you as well as you’d like and take an honest look around the stories you are telling yourself, the stories others are creating for you, and determine how you could shift that story, look at it from a different angle, focus on what was learned instead of negative emotion, consider other perspectives, what would it look like to experiment with changes in the stories you’re telling so they could serve you. 

   I know it’s hard work, but we can do hard things, especially when there is so much riding on it. 

   Like Harry Potter learning to use his magic, sometimes the process is slow, but one step at a time, we make progress. Take a step this week.

   Thanks for being here - share this episode with someone it will bless. Do a little good in the world by sharing a link. See you in two weeks for our next episode. 

   ]]>54aae47e-5c32-4a73-b8c1-1f013a174729Wed, 20 Apr 2022 06:00:00 -070034:42falsefull217217Lori LeeEpisode 216: Resiliency - What does it take to bounce back?Episode 216: Resiliency - What does it take to bounce back?

   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast.

   Today we are talking about Resilience - let’s define it: Resilence is “an ability to recover from or adjust easily to misfortune or change.”

   Lynn G. Robbins, a leader in the LDS church shared, “During my visit to Brigham Young University–Idaho in the fall of 2017, the school’s new president, Henry J. Eyring, told me that his foremost concern was the high dropout rate of college freshmen. Students leave college for a variety of reasons, but a lack of resilience is one of the leading reasons that many universities across the United States are experiencing this same challenge.”

   He then mentioned that the military is noticing the same thing:

   “Discovering a lack of resilience among its recruits, the U.S. Army started offering the Master Resilience Training (MRT) program to fortify soldiers against the stress, demands, and hardships of military service.”

   Colleges, military, these are just a few places where this lack of resilience is being noted among us.

   So let’s have a conversation….

   University, the Military, Covid - these things are not causing the lack of resiliency, they are just exposing it. How do we become more resilient?’’

   Stay tuned for a look at resiliency and the keys we need to help us bounce back.

   Lower resilience among today’s youth may be caused by a number of things - I’ll throw a few out:

   1. Less physical activity (read too much device time), so the don’t know how to push through resistance.
   2. Impatience in a world of instant gratification. Resilience is developed in great part through the virtue of patience.
   3. Protection from rough seas. “Smooth seas do not make skillful sailors.”

   
   

   While the reasons are important so we can start making changes, what I want to talk about today is what resiliency looks like.

   Is it just me, or have you also noticed, as we listen to the incredible life stories shared on this podcast, that one thing constantly pops up, a cross roads. This cross roads, in all our lives, may come up over and over, but that’s why it’s even more important to be aware of it. It is the cross roads of choosing victimhood/blame/depression and giving-up OR choosing growth/overcoming and keep on, keeping on.

   This cross roads is a sacred place. It’s a place where the human soul does its hardest work. It is not a place to be taken lightly or to be talked about lightly. It is not the cause of the struggle, it is the choice in the struggle.

   Today we talk about resiliency - because as Steve Goodier said, “My scars remind me that I did indeed survive my deepest wounds. That in itself is an accomplishment. And they bring to mind something else, too. They remind me that the damage life has inflicted on me has, in many places, left me stronger and more resilient. What hurt me in the past has actually made me better equipped to face the present.” 

   I start out with this quote because I think when we are deep in the struggle that this becomes and important thing to remember. It might feel like life is unfair and you’re getting the shit kicked out of you, but someday it will be this process and what you do with it that create your character and your strength.

   On today’s show we’ll hear from 3 people, clips of their stories and how they navigated the horrible spaces of paralysis from a rodeo accident, walking again after a bike/SUV collision, and taking back life after sexual abuse, and a deep emersion in alcoholic households. 

   We all have our own path with our own difficult struggles - no one’s is the same….but what is the same is the importance of resiliency. This one thing determines whether you make it through, and how you show up on the other side. 

   What does resiliency look like? It’s always best...]]>Episode 216: Resiliency - What does it take to bounce back?

   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast.

   Today we are talking about Resilience - let’s define it: Resilence is “an ability to recover from or adjust easily to misfortune or change.”

   Lynn G. Robbins, a leader in the LDS church shared, “During my visit to Brigham Young University–Idaho in the fall of 2017, the school’s new president, Henry J. Eyring, told me that his foremost concern was the high dropout rate of college freshmen. Students leave college for a variety of reasons, but a lack of resilience is one of the leading reasons that many universities across the United States are experiencing this same challenge.”

   He then mentioned that the military is noticing the same thing:

   “Discovering a lack of resilience among its recruits, the U.S. Army started offering the Master Resilience Training (MRT) program to fortify soldiers against the stress, demands, and hardships of military service.”

   Colleges, military, these are just a few places where this lack of resilience is being noted among us.

   So let’s have a conversation….

   University, the Military, Covid - these things are not causing the lack of resiliency, they are just exposing it. How do we become more resilient?’’

   Stay tuned for a look at resiliency and the keys we need to help us bounce back.

   Lower resilience among today’s youth may be caused by a number of things - I’ll throw a few out:

   1. Less physical activity (read too much device time), so the don’t know how to push through resistance.
   2. Impatience in a world of instant gratification. Resilience is developed in great part through the virtue of patience.
   3. Protection from rough seas. “Smooth seas do not make skillful sailors.”

   
   

   While the reasons are important so we can start making changes, what I want to talk about today is what resiliency looks like.

   Is it just me, or have you also noticed, as we listen to the incredible life stories shared on this podcast, that one thing constantly pops up, a cross roads. This cross roads, in all our lives, may come up over and over, but that’s why it’s even more important to be aware of it. It is the cross roads of choosing victimhood/blame/depression and giving-up OR choosing growth/overcoming and keep on, keeping on.

   This cross roads is a sacred place. It’s a place where the human soul does its hardest work. It is not a place to be taken lightly or to be talked about lightly. It is not the cause of the struggle, it is the choice in the struggle.

   Today we talk about resiliency - because as Steve Goodier said, “My scars remind me that I did indeed survive my deepest wounds. That in itself is an accomplishment. And they bring to mind something else, too. They remind me that the damage life has inflicted on me has, in many places, left me stronger and more resilient. What hurt me in the past has actually made me better equipped to face the present.” 

   I start out with this quote because I think when we are deep in the struggle that this becomes and important thing to remember. It might feel like life is unfair and you’re getting the shit kicked out of you, but someday it will be this process and what you do with it that create your character and your strength.

   On today’s show we’ll hear from 3 people, clips of their stories and how they navigated the horrible spaces of paralysis from a rodeo accident, walking again after a bike/SUV collision, and taking back life after sexual abuse, and a deep emersion in alcoholic households. 

   We all have our own path with our own difficult struggles - no one’s is the same….but what is the same is the importance of resiliency. This one thing determines whether you make it through, and how you show up on the other side. 

   What does resiliency look like? It’s always best to look at real life examples: So I’m dipping into 3 past interviews.

   We’ll hear some tips for sure, but as I listen to stories on the podcast, over and over, ONE thing that pops out front and center - ALWAYS —as the key to resiliency— is ATTITUDE. Resiliency is determine by how we respond to hard things.

   Dieter F. Uchtdorf said, “It’s your reaction to adversity, not adversity itself that determines how your life’s story will develop.”

   “I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.” -- Maya Angelou

   “Persistence and resilience only come from having been given the chance to work through difficult problems.” -- Gever Tulles

   There is no end to the quotes about this fact of life - when we are beat down to the very bottom of what we feel we can handle, that is the time where the choice becomes crucial. Attitude, even if you can only start with a small hope, will put us on the path of residency.

   In Episode 166 - Braxton Nielsen - Born to Succeed, was always interested in rodeo, Braxton placed 8th in the nation in 2017 and then went pro. His dream of becoming a world champion bareback rider was getting closer and closer, but life happened and after the accident Braxton was given less than a 5% chance of walking again. 

   Five fused vertebrae’s, two rods, eight screws, numbness in his right leg and can’t feel his left foot. Recover is a long road, but stay tuned today to hear about his journey and to soak in some of that positive attitude that Braxton exudes as he talks about life.

   Tune into the audio program to hear his clip

   In Episode 168 - Michael O’Brien speaking about how he survived the morning of July 11, 2001 (more about that in a minute) said,

    “If we want to create the lives we want to create, it is all emotional labor.” —Michael O’Brien

   So, on the morning of July 11, 2001, Michael O’Brien, an avid cyclist, was riding his bicycle on a New Mexico road when an SUV hit him head-on going 40 mph. The crushing accident left him near death as the mede-vac helicopter descended to take his broken body to be pieced back together. Today Michael is with us and will take us to the darkness of his accident and the long, slow road to recovery, but he’ll also take us to his shift – the moment when he decided it was the power of his mind that would decide the rest of his life. It wasn’t the tragedy that would define him, but how he responded to the tragedy.

   Tune into the audio program to hear his clip.

   Bethany Wallace in episode 151 - Finding Your Way to Healing, talks to us about her story of how she overcame, forgave, learned and took action after being sexually assaulted multi times and living in Beverly alcoholic households. 

   Tune into the program to hear her clip.

   Her journey in resiliency was supported by gratitude and the power to choose. She has spent the past 12 years taking actions, often in spite of her feelings, to become a healthier person.

   As we close this discussion, let’s revisit the what it takes: 1. A positive mindset/attitude 2. hard work - a willingness to not give up. 3. Support from others. Don’t forget to reach out, to get support, to allow the humanness of the process

   Your challenge this week is to look at your challenges and your attitude about them. Where are you and how can you shift it to a more positive space?

   Share this episode with anyone who may benefit - Just copy the link and email it, or hit share episode on your app. It’s easy and it’s a great way to make the world better.

   Have a great 2 weeks, until we meet again.

   ]]>67d27bcb-33da-4bac-870c-e172d12c3925Wed, 06 Apr 2022 06:00:00 -070029:54falsefull216216Lori LeeEpisode 215: Interview: Kimberly Hill - Men's Relationship CoachEpisode 215: Interview: Kimberly Hill - Men's Relationship Coach Healthy relationships are one of the most important parts, if not THE most important part of creating a life story that we love. When it comes down to it, on our death beds, it’s always about the relationships we’ve had, not about how many days we worked, or how many toys we bought. Intimate relationships are crucial to our well-being. This relationship - the one with our significant other - finding them - the right one, and nurturing a healthy relationship, is, dare I say, a life goal for most.   So, today’s guest, Kimberly Hill, the host of the Self Confidence Project podcast, and men’s life, dating and relationship coach, is here to talk to us about where men are struggling, how to navigate this area with authenticity, common mistakes and how to over come them, and a lot more.   Tune into the audio program for this very cool discussion that’s going to focus on the men of the world.   Kimberly says, “Healthy relationship are not a fantasy. They do exist. But they require more than just love. They require an equal portion of love, compassion, a deep understanding of one’s self, commitment, excitement and effort - from both parties. Kimberly has thousands of hours of direct work with men on confidence, dating and relationships and brings a mastery of coaching, emotional maturity practices and leadership to her clients.  She gets to the heart of what really matters, and I’m so excited to have an episode that focuses on men, because I think they often get left out of this mind-set work,  so let’s get started…   On the show we start with Kimberly's story…how she got into this work of helping men with this intimate and super important part of their lives? We discuss what mistakes men make most in relationships? I ask her what she thinks is the best mind-set for men in dating, and in relationships? We talk about life satisfaction and why this is a part of her coaching. Then we delve into how a man can get a clear vision for his life after a divorce and then set boundaries in his dating? To get a hold of Kimberly: info@selfconfidenceproject.com www.kimberlyninahill.com and her podcast: The Self-Confidence Project The Self-Confidence Project is a weekly podcast featuring conversations on life, dating, relationships, confidence and motivation. In each episode, Kimberly talks candidly about the stuff we all face in life and love. She shares an honest perspective to bring you the truth you need to hear – even if it’s not pretty. If you’re looking for relatable content and inspiring advice on how to transform your relationship and dating experience, tune into The Self-Confidence Project.   Your challenge for this week is to look at your primary relationship, or the primary relationship that you want, and take one small step toward making it a little more healthy.   Thanks for listening, please leave a review for the show on whatever app you listen, and if you email me a screen shot of your review and your address I’ll mail you  a Love Your Story sticker. Email is lorijlee@msn.com   See you in two weeks for our next episode of how to live your best life story on purpose.]]>Episode 215: Interview: Kimberly Hill - Men's Relationship Coach Healthy relationships are one of the most important parts, if not THE most important part of creating a life story that we love. When it comes down to it, on our death beds, it’s always about the relationships we’ve had, not about how many days we worked, or how many toys we bought. Intimate relationships are crucial to our well-being. This relationship - the one with our significant other - finding them - the right one, and nurturing a healthy relationship, is, dare I say, a life goal for most.   So, today’s guest, Kimberly Hill, the host of the Self Confidence Project podcast, and men’s life, dating and relationship coach, is here to talk to us about where men are struggling, how to navigate this area with authenticity, common mistakes and how to over come them, and a lot more.   Tune into the audio program for this very cool discussion that’s going to focus on the men of the world.   Kimberly says, “Healthy relationship are not a fantasy. They do exist. But they require more than just love. They require an equal portion of love, compassion, a deep understanding of one’s self, commitment, excitement and effort - from both parties. Kimberly has thousands of hours of direct work with men on confidence, dating and relationships and brings a mastery of coaching, emotional maturity practices and leadership to her clients.  She gets to the heart of what really matters, and I’m so excited to have an episode that focuses on men, because I think they often get left out of this mind-set work,  so let’s get started…   On the show we start with Kimberly's story…how she got into this work of helping men with this intimate and super important part of their lives? We discuss what mistakes men make most in relationships? I ask her what she thinks is the best mind-set for men in dating, and in relationships? We talk about life satisfaction and why this is a part of her coaching. Then we delve into how a man can get a clear vision for his life after a divorce and then set boundaries in his dating? To get a hold of Kimberly: info@selfconfidenceproject.com www.kimberlyninahill.com and her podcast: The Self-Confidence Project The Self-Confidence Project is a weekly podcast featuring conversations on life, dating, relationships, confidence and motivation. In each episode, Kimberly talks candidly about the stuff we all face in life and love. She shares an honest perspective to bring you the truth you need to hear – even if it’s not pretty. If you’re looking for relatable content and inspiring advice on how to transform your relationship and dating experience, tune into The Self-Confidence Project.   Your challenge for this week is to look at your primary relationship, or the primary relationship that you want, and take one small step toward making it a little more healthy.   Thanks for listening, please leave a review for the show on whatever app you listen, and if you email me a screen shot of your review and your address I’ll mail you  a Love Your Story sticker. Email is lorijlee@msn.com   See you in two weeks for our next episode of how to live your best life story on purpose.]]>0cd88639-8437-4f25-ab95-a7e419151403Wed, 23 Mar 2022 06:00:00 -070035:06falsefull215215Lori LeeEpisode 214 - Walking on WaterEpisode 214 - Walking on Water Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast! Today is about taking a walk on the water.  In my living room I have one picture of Christ. It is a picture of his feet. A picture of him from the knees down, walking on the water. I chose this painting, because in my soul I sense the deep importance of this display to us. The deep importance for us of learning to walk with faith, of coming to understand what it is, why it’s important, and how to develop and use it in our own lives.   For us to grow and stretch, and become more, we have to risk. We have to struggle to stand, to try to walk in the first place. We have to have more faith in our why, in ourselves, and in our supportive universal purpose and God, than in fear. Tune into the audio program for 3 clips from incredible women about the idea of walking on water.   Martha Beck, the international life coach said, “Every leap into light starts as a leap in the dark.”   I’ll point out the obvious - Every leap into the dark is a step out onto the water…   In episode 78 I did an interview Ganel-Lyn Condie, the popular LDS writer and speaker. We called the show: Trust the Process   One of the things we talked about was that faith is a process - we start by daring to step out of the boat, if we want to walk on water, and from there the process of sinking, rising and walking on water unfolds over and over.  Here’s a clip from our conversation: Here's the link to her full episode if you'd like to hear the whole interview: https://loveyourstorypodcast.com/captivate-podcast/episode-78-interview-ganel-lyn-condie-trust-process/   All who try will sink, rise, and walk on water, over and over. It’s the process. And when others are trying, let’s give them credit too. Empathy and understanding in the process is important, so we can all practice and learn with one another’s support.   One important key is that our lives are less about what is going on around us, and more about what is going on inside us. We create the meaning that events have to us. Do we create that meaning around faith or around fear? That’s an important question because the answer will determine very different outcomes. In my interview with Leslie Householder, the ward-winning international best selling author of The Jackrabbit Factor, Portal to Genius and Hidden Treasures, we discussed this idea of what faith is and how mindset triggers the power of faith. Tune into the audio episode to hear from Leslie - If you'd like to hear her entire interview, here is the link:   https://loveyourstorypodcast.com/captivate-podcast/episode173-rare-faith-interview-with-leslie-householder/ Another quote by Martha Beck, the internationally renowned life coach, shares some of the real life ways we use faith. She  said, “Anyone who embraces the mender’s way of life must proceed through continual, infinite, breathtaking leaps of faith. Each time you face an unknown future with creativity rather than grasping at known quantities, you leap. Each time you dare to believe your art can sustain you financially, you leap. Each time you trust your tribe, you leap. Each time you embrace a love that lays you bare in body, heart, or soul, you leap. And whenever you begin to disbelieve in yourself, your destiny, your ability to heal some part of the world, you must leap instead into the branches of magic.” We use faith every day in every way. When we get out of bed, when we attempt something new, when we reach out to someone and risk rejection, when we trust God and things we may not understand, when we choose to trust that living better, kinder, with more love will bring us happier lives than resorting to more basic emotions like anger, hatred, holding grudges. When we work hard at something -going to school, working for a promotion or a new client,...]]>Episode 214 - Walking on Water Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast! Today is about taking a walk on the water.  In my living room I have one picture of Christ. It is a picture of his feet. A picture of him from the knees down, walking on the water. I chose this painting, because in my soul I sense the deep importance of this display to us. The deep importance for us of learning to walk with faith, of coming to understand what it is, why it’s important, and how to develop and use it in our own lives.   For us to grow and stretch, and become more, we have to risk. We have to struggle to stand, to try to walk in the first place. We have to have more faith in our why, in ourselves, and in our supportive universal purpose and God, than in fear. Tune into the audio program for 3 clips from incredible women about the idea of walking on water.   Martha Beck, the international life coach said, “Every leap into light starts as a leap in the dark.”   I’ll point out the obvious - Every leap into the dark is a step out onto the water…   In episode 78 I did an interview Ganel-Lyn Condie, the popular LDS writer and speaker. We called the show: Trust the Process   One of the things we talked about was that faith is a process - we start by daring to step out of the boat, if we want to walk on water, and from there the process of sinking, rising and walking on water unfolds over and over.  Here’s a clip from our conversation: Here's the link to her full episode if you'd like to hear the whole interview: https://loveyourstorypodcast.com/captivate-podcast/episode-78-interview-ganel-lyn-condie-trust-process/   All who try will sink, rise, and walk on water, over and over. It’s the process. And when others are trying, let’s give them credit too. Empathy and understanding in the process is important, so we can all practice and learn with one another’s support.   One important key is that our lives are less about what is going on around us, and more about what is going on inside us. We create the meaning that events have to us. Do we create that meaning around faith or around fear? That’s an important question because the answer will determine very different outcomes. In my interview with Leslie Householder, the ward-winning international best selling author of The Jackrabbit Factor, Portal to Genius and Hidden Treasures, we discussed this idea of what faith is and how mindset triggers the power of faith. Tune into the audio episode to hear from Leslie - If you'd like to hear her entire interview, here is the link:   https://loveyourstorypodcast.com/captivate-podcast/episode173-rare-faith-interview-with-leslie-householder/ Another quote by Martha Beck, the internationally renowned life coach, shares some of the real life ways we use faith. She  said, “Anyone who embraces the mender’s way of life must proceed through continual, infinite, breathtaking leaps of faith. Each time you face an unknown future with creativity rather than grasping at known quantities, you leap. Each time you dare to believe your art can sustain you financially, you leap. Each time you trust your tribe, you leap. Each time you embrace a love that lays you bare in body, heart, or soul, you leap. And whenever you begin to disbelieve in yourself, your destiny, your ability to heal some part of the world, you must leap instead into the branches of magic.” We use faith every day in every way. When we get out of bed, when we attempt something new, when we reach out to someone and risk rejection, when we trust God and things we may not understand, when we choose to trust that living better, kinder, with more love will bring us happier lives than resorting to more basic emotions like anger, hatred, holding grudges. When we work hard at something -going to school, working for a promotion or a new client, stretching into a new area, we are using faith. It’s a very everyday occurrence.   When dealing with faith I think there are a couple different segments of the process. The first is believing enough to step out onto the water - so to speak.    George Lucas, the creator of Star Wars, put it this way, “You simply have to put one foot in front of the other and keep going.” This ode to persistence is based on faith. We don’t keep walking into the dark forest unless we believe we have a shot at surviving. This is hope, this is faith, this is persistent action that creates results.   The second, is intentionally using the tools that Leslie Householder just mentioned, tapping into Universal Law and being able to create intentionally through our mindset and belief.    And the third aspect, I believe, is trusting in God and his grace, because things don’t always turn out the way WE want.   In my interview with Katie Lee, the musician, in episode 131, she shared a gorgeous song that I want to share again on this episode. It’s called Trust Grace. Tune into the full episode to hear some of her beautiful music and ideas - or use this link to listen to her entire episode: https://loveyourstorypodcast.com/captivate-podcast/episode-131-interview-katie-lee-inspirational-music-time/   I believe that faith is the first of all principles. Without it we do nothing. Without it we don’t get out of bed in the morning, and with it, worlds can be created.   Learning faith, practicing faith, exercising that faith daily, may be one of the most challenging things we learn how to do, because in using it we are combating fear, and fear is a very real human emotion - that may be the fear of failure, the fear of not being enough, the fear of not being accepted, the fear of death, the fear of not having enough, etc. etc. . But as we come to understand the importance of faith, the concepts behind tapping into the universal laws that support it, and we stretch into trusting God daily, we WILL become more powerful. We will get better at walking on the water. It’s not something we just do on our own, and it’s not something God does for us, it’s a partnership. Faith requires us to believe in his wisdom and his grace, even when we can’t see it. Faith requires us to stretch into the unknown. But it is by faith that miracles happen. It is by faith that we grow and become stronger. It is by faith that we change our world. It is by faith that we create. It is by faith that we walk on water.   Your challenge this week is to consider what you are currently afraid of. What storm is keeping you in the boat, and what one brave move will allow you to step out of the boat? Take it. And know that taking that step, walking, sinking, and reaching out, is all part of the process, over and over as we get stronger.    Thank you for listening in to today’s program. Please share it with someone it would support today. And take a quick second to scroll down your app and leave us a review. It’s easy and I really appreciate hearing from you. Until next time. Keep working to love your story, and create it with intention.                    ]]>3cf83ea9-69f5-49a6-a483-9820aa5be3fcWed, 09 Mar 2022 06:00:00 -070025:59falsefull214214Lori LeeEpisode 213: Got Trauma? Interview Trevor LayEpisode 213: Got Trauma? Interview Trevor Lay Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. As we live our life stories, and strive to create our best life story, we have the opportunity to deal with challenges. One of these challenges can be trauma. There are many things that cause trauma for us - violence, abuse, we’ll get into this more in the interview, and what causes trauma for some will not cause trauma in another, but learning to navigate and learn from it, and doing the work to make sure it doesn’t sabotage us and our relationships, seems like a pretty important skill set. Mark Goulston, MD, said, “Unlike simple stress, trauma changes your view of your life and yourself. It shatters your most basic assumptions about yourself and your world — “Life is good,” “I’m safe,” “People are kind,” “I can trust others,” “The future is likely to be good” — and replaces them with feelings like “The world is dangerous,” “I can’t win,” “I can’t trust other people,” or “There’s no hope.” Join me today as I talk with Trevor Lay, from Little Rock Arkansas, who has over 18 years of experience in behavioral healthcare and social services. He specializes in trauma and does trauma trainings for his local DHS offices and foster care support groups in Little Rock. Stay tuned for conversation about what trauma is, misconceptions about trauma, how it works in the body, how to effectively treat it, and the effect it can have on our relationships. Trevor Lay is the Executive Director of Full Potential Child Development Center and received his Master’s degree in Social Work from the University of Arkansas. Trevor came to my attention after using his skills to help Bethany Wallace, a past guest of the Love Your Story podcast, and she highly recommended him - said his skill set was a God-send that helped to salvage her marriage. So Trevor and I have done some talking, and I think we’re all going to learn some helpful things today. Join Trevor and I on the audio program to hear answers to some of these questions: 1. Let’s start with a little of your story. Why do you do the work you do? 2. One of your favorite quotes is By Bessel Van Der Kolk M.D, from The Body Keeps the Score. “Being able to feel safe with other people is probably the single most important aspect of mental health; safe connections are fundamental to meaningful and satisfying lives.” — What does this quote mean to you? 3. What is trauma? What types are the most prevalent? Misconceptions? 4. What are the symptoms of trauma? 5. How does trauma get lodged in the body? 6. How does it manifest itself in our behavior with other? Relationships? 7. You do marital counseling privately - do you find trauma and marriage overlap? 8. What should people who have experienced trauma do to start down the path to recovery? To find Trevor Lay: trevor.lay.5@gmail.com I’ll close with a quote from Michelle Rosenthal. “Trauma creates change you don’t choose. Healing is about creating change you do choose.” Thanks for being here today. Please share this episode link with someone who has suffered from trauma. Keep living your best life story, on purpose. And I’d sure appreciate hearing from listeners, with on the website loveyourstorypodcast.com - or through reviews on your podcast app. See you in two weeks.]]>Episode 213: Got Trauma? Interview Trevor Lay Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. As we live our life stories, and strive to create our best life story, we have the opportunity to deal with challenges. One of these challenges can be trauma. There are many things that cause trauma for us - violence, abuse, we’ll get into this more in the interview, and what causes trauma for some will not cause trauma in another, but learning to navigate and learn from it, and doing the work to make sure it doesn’t sabotage us and our relationships, seems like a pretty important skill set. Mark Goulston, MD, said, “Unlike simple stress, trauma changes your view of your life and yourself. It shatters your most basic assumptions about yourself and your world — “Life is good,” “I’m safe,” “People are kind,” “I can trust others,” “The future is likely to be good” — and replaces them with feelings like “The world is dangerous,” “I can’t win,” “I can’t trust other people,” or “There’s no hope.” Join me today as I talk with Trevor Lay, from Little Rock Arkansas, who has over 18 years of experience in behavioral healthcare and social services. He specializes in trauma and does trauma trainings for his local DHS offices and foster care support groups in Little Rock. Stay tuned for conversation about what trauma is, misconceptions about trauma, how it works in the body, how to effectively treat it, and the effect it can have on our relationships. Trevor Lay is the Executive Director of Full Potential Child Development Center and received his Master’s degree in Social Work from the University of Arkansas. Trevor came to my attention after using his skills to help Bethany Wallace, a past guest of the Love Your Story podcast, and she highly recommended him - said his skill set was a God-send that helped to salvage her marriage. So Trevor and I have done some talking, and I think we’re all going to learn some helpful things today. Join Trevor and I on the audio program to hear answers to some of these questions: 1. Let’s start with a little of your story. Why do you do the work you do? 2. One of your favorite quotes is By Bessel Van Der Kolk M.D, from The Body Keeps the Score. “Being able to feel safe with other people is probably the single most important aspect of mental health; safe connections are fundamental to meaningful and satisfying lives.” — What does this quote mean to you? 3. What is trauma? What types are the most prevalent? Misconceptions? 4. What are the symptoms of trauma? 5. How does trauma get lodged in the body? 6. How does it manifest itself in our behavior with other? Relationships? 7. You do marital counseling privately - do you find trauma and marriage overlap? 8. What should people who have experienced trauma do to start down the path to recovery? To find Trevor Lay: trevor.lay.5@gmail.com I’ll close with a quote from Michelle Rosenthal. “Trauma creates change you don’t choose. Healing is about creating change you do choose.” Thanks for being here today. Please share this episode link with someone who has suffered from trauma. Keep living your best life story, on purpose. And I’d sure appreciate hearing from listeners, with on the website loveyourstorypodcast.com - or through reviews on your podcast app. See you in two weeks.]]>ba538bb6-6d95-4938-8d11-9751aea541d9Wed, 23 Feb 2022 06:00:00 -070029:09falsefull213213Lori LeeEpisode 212: Domestic Violence: Interview Brielle Cotterman and Melissa HaenchenEpisode 212: Domestic Violence: Interview Brielle Cotterman and Melissa Haenchen

    Brielle Cotterman is a TEDx Speaker, Publicity Expert, and Celebrity-Maker. She is a survivor of attempted murder and domestic violence and an advocate for a world where intimate partner abuse is not tolerated and survivors are met with empathy. She is a graduate of Indiana University, a World’s Grand Champion Equestrian, and she has been married for just over a year to the love of her life and owns & operates a show horse breeding farm, where she lives with her husband, three children and many, many animals!

   She has spent the better part of the last decade helping clients to craft and scale Dream careers to 7 figures and beyond by leveraging their personal stories and passions in order to create speaking tours, author award-winning books, procure media placements, and inspire the millions of people that need to hear their story.

   Tune in to the audio program to hear Brielle's story about having a gun held to her head, and how she has overcome the abuse.

   Melissa Haenchen, Prevention Coordinator at the Utah Domestic Violence Coalition, hails from Eastern Kansas and earned her degree in Women, Gender and Sexuality Studies from the University of Kansas. She began her career as a domestic violence advocate, and has also held roles coordinating outreach and events for an organization serving adult survivors of childhood sexual abuse and supporting parents to strengthen protective factors to prevent childhood sexual abuse, child abuse and neglect.

   1-3 women undergo abuse. If you need help - please use the following tools:

   To contact Brielle Cotterman:

   www.Briellecotterman.com

   To contact Melissa Haenchen:

   Utah Domestic Violence Coalition:

   Office: 801-521-5544

   Help Resources:

   24-hour LinkLine - 1-800-897-LINK (Available 24/7 in Utah)

   For other locations in the USA: www.thehotline.org

   1-800-799-7233

   Utah Coalition Against Sexual Assault - www.ucasa.org

   Utah's 24 hr. Sexual Violence crisis line: 1-888-421-1100

   Share this episode with anyone who may need it. We'll see you in two weeks for our next episode of the Love Your Story podcast.

   ]]>Episode 212: Domestic Violence: Interview Brielle Cotterman and Melissa Haenchen

    Brielle Cotterman is a TEDx Speaker, Publicity Expert, and Celebrity-Maker. She is a survivor of attempted murder and domestic violence and an advocate for a world where intimate partner abuse is not tolerated and survivors are met with empathy. She is a graduate of Indiana University, a World’s Grand Champion Equestrian, and she has been married for just over a year to the love of her life and owns & operates a show horse breeding farm, where she lives with her husband, three children and many, many animals!

   She has spent the better part of the last decade helping clients to craft and scale Dream careers to 7 figures and beyond by leveraging their personal stories and passions in order to create speaking tours, author award-winning books, procure media placements, and inspire the millions of people that need to hear their story.

   Tune in to the audio program to hear Brielle's story about having a gun held to her head, and how she has overcome the abuse.

   Melissa Haenchen, Prevention Coordinator at the Utah Domestic Violence Coalition, hails from Eastern Kansas and earned her degree in Women, Gender and Sexuality Studies from the University of Kansas. She began her career as a domestic violence advocate, and has also held roles coordinating outreach and events for an organization serving adult survivors of childhood sexual abuse and supporting parents to strengthen protective factors to prevent childhood sexual abuse, child abuse and neglect.

   1-3 women undergo abuse. If you need help - please use the following tools:

   To contact Brielle Cotterman:

   www.Briellecotterman.com

   To contact Melissa Haenchen:

   Utah Domestic Violence Coalition:

   Office: 801-521-5544

   Help Resources:

   24-hour LinkLine - 1-800-897-LINK (Available 24/7 in Utah)

   For other locations in the USA: www.thehotline.org

   1-800-799-7233

   Utah Coalition Against Sexual Assault - www.ucasa.org

   Utah's 24 hr. Sexual Violence crisis line: 1-888-421-1100

   Share this episode with anyone who may need it. We'll see you in two weeks for our next episode of the Love Your Story podcast.

   ]]>d15ac190-0b42-496e-9916-67db4f94f2bcWed, 09 Feb 2022 06:30:00 -070048:42falsefull212212Lori LeeEpisode 211: Healthy Co-Parenting: Interview with Jae Behrman and Amanda LouderEpisode 211: Healthy Co-Parenting: Interview with Jae Behrman and Amanda Louder

   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today I have an interesting duo. A divorced couple who had 3 children together. After their divorce they needed to heal and grow individually, but they also had to immediately co-parent. This is an important topic, because for children of broken homes, how this co-parenting is done can make a huge difference in how much baggage the children take away, in how secure the children feel with life, even how loved the children feel. I haven’t heard someone talk about this before so I’m looking forward to today’s conversation.

   In 2011 Jae and Amanda filed for divorce. Stay tuned to find out why. But more importantly, stay tuned to hear a story of growth and positive co-parenting and what that looks like. 

   Join the audio for my discussion with Jae and Amanda for the answers to some of these questions:

   Tell me just a little bit about who each of you are today, then we’ll jump backward in time to get your story.

   Jae - What did you learn about yourself from your first marriage? What have you done to heal and grow?

   Amanda - What did you learn about yourself? What have you done to heal and grow?

   Jae - How is Amanda better now? What growth have you seen?

   Amanda - How is Jae better now? What broth have you seen?

   Did you always co-parent well together? What does that look like for you guys?

   When did you make this choice to co-parent carefully and positively and what does it look like to co-parent with someone who has hurt you?

   Why is co-parenting well so important to our children?

   Individual thoughts on change, growth, and forgiveness after divorce.

   
   

   I have two quotes I want to share. The first is from Oprah Winfrey. She said,

   “We can’t become what we need to be by remaining what we are.”

   Our dark days, the break-up of a family, the dissolution of a relationship, especially these times can be wake-up calls, the fast track to growth, if you let it.

   The second quote is from Bernice Johnson Reagon, She said,

   “Life’s challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, they’re supposed to help you discover who you are.”

   
   

   Keep creating a story you love through continued growth. Nobody gets it all right the first time. It’s a process. 

   Please share this episode with anyone you think it will support and inspire. You can find all the show notes on our website at www.loveyoustorypodcast.com

   To contact Amanda Louder:

   amandalouder.com/blog/podcast

   See you in two weeks for the next great inspirational episode where stories show us the way forward.

   ]]>Episode 211: Healthy Co-Parenting: Interview with Jae Behrman and Amanda Louder

   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today I have an interesting duo. A divorced couple who had 3 children together. After their divorce they needed to heal and grow individually, but they also had to immediately co-parent. This is an important topic, because for children of broken homes, how this co-parenting is done can make a huge difference in how much baggage the children take away, in how secure the children feel with life, even how loved the children feel. I haven’t heard someone talk about this before so I’m looking forward to today’s conversation.

   In 2011 Jae and Amanda filed for divorce. Stay tuned to find out why. But more importantly, stay tuned to hear a story of growth and positive co-parenting and what that looks like. 

   Join the audio for my discussion with Jae and Amanda for the answers to some of these questions:

   Tell me just a little bit about who each of you are today, then we’ll jump backward in time to get your story.

   Jae - What did you learn about yourself from your first marriage? What have you done to heal and grow?

   Amanda - What did you learn about yourself? What have you done to heal and grow?

   Jae - How is Amanda better now? What growth have you seen?

   Amanda - How is Jae better now? What broth have you seen?

   Did you always co-parent well together? What does that look like for you guys?

   When did you make this choice to co-parent carefully and positively and what does it look like to co-parent with someone who has hurt you?

   Why is co-parenting well so important to our children?

   Individual thoughts on change, growth, and forgiveness after divorce.

   
   

   I have two quotes I want to share. The first is from Oprah Winfrey. She said,

   “We can’t become what we need to be by remaining what we are.”

   Our dark days, the break-up of a family, the dissolution of a relationship, especially these times can be wake-up calls, the fast track to growth, if you let it.

   The second quote is from Bernice Johnson Reagon, She said,

   “Life’s challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, they’re supposed to help you discover who you are.”

   
   

   Keep creating a story you love through continued growth. Nobody gets it all right the first time. It’s a process. 

   Please share this episode with anyone you think it will support and inspire. You can find all the show notes on our website at www.loveyoustorypodcast.com

   To contact Amanda Louder:

   amandalouder.com/blog/podcast

   See you in two weeks for the next great inspirational episode where stories show us the way forward.

   ]]>a1f45156-fd24-4644-b856-d1a532412bc1Wed, 26 Jan 2022 06:30:00 -070044:11falsefull211211Lori LeeEpisode 210: 3 Tips for Being Exceptional with Co-Host Jessica BurrellEpisode 210: 3 Tips for Being Exceptional

   with Co-Host Jessica Burrell

   Let's start off 2022 with 3 Tips for Being Exceptional.

   Join us in the audio program to hear the discussion about being exceptional and what these tips mean in much more detail:

   3-Tips:

   #1 - It's How We Do What We Do.

   #2 - Be the Miracle

   #3 - Get off the Bench

   To contact Jessica Burrell:

   Jessica@amplifyyourvision.com

   ]]>Episode 210: 3 Tips for Being Exceptional

   with Co-Host Jessica Burrell

   Let's start off 2022 with 3 Tips for Being Exceptional.

   Join us in the audio program to hear the discussion about being exceptional and what these tips mean in much more detail:

   3-Tips:

   #1 - It's How We Do What We Do.

   #2 - Be the Miracle

   #3 - Get off the Bench

   To contact Jessica Burrell:

   Jessica@amplifyyourvision.com

   ]]>55864039-0b1f-48c7-b35c-da80cdc8ccedWed, 12 Jan 2022 06:30:00 -070028:28falsefull210210Lori LeeEpisode 209: Best of 2021Episode 209: Best of 2021

   Best of 2021

   Welcome to the LYS Podcast! Today’s episode is one of my favorite of the year because it celebrates the listener favorites from the past year. Today we’ll hear little clips from the top five episodes of 2021. What did you guys love best? Which episodes lifted your spirits and gave you a dash of inspiration to create your best life story - whether that meant striving a little harder, living with intention, or making it through one of the muddy swamps in your life story?

   Welcome to the top 5 LYS episodes of 2021. 

   Let’s start out with #5 - Drum roll. This year you guys loved the idea of owning your own story - episode 188: Own Your Story takes us on a discussion of what it looks like to accept yourself, your life, your responsibility, and your power. 

   https://loveyourstorypodcast.com/captivate-podcast/episode-188-own-your-story/

   #4 favorite for 2021 is episode 185 My interview with Barney “Scout” Mann (trail name is Scout.) , the author of Journeys North and Pacific Crest Trail, Appalachian trail and Continental Divide through-hiker. This Triple Crown hiker has logged a lot of miles: The Pacific Crest Trail is 2650 miles long and covers 26 national forests, 7 national parks, 5 state parks and 3 national monuments. It takes 5 months at an average of 20 miles a day. The Appalachian Trail is 2180 miles and the Continental Divide Trail is 3100 miles. His book Journeys North is stories from the PCT, stories about humanity, connection, strength, companionship.

   https://loveyourstorypodcast.com/captivate-podcast/episode-185-a-story-about-life-on-the-trail-interview-barney-scout-mann/

   #3 People’s choice for 2021 is episode 187 - Spiritual Gifts with Deb Atella. In 2005 Deb had a near death experience where she saw family members who had passed away. Her experience and ability to tune into the spirit world was something that took awhile to get used to, but as she accepted the gift, put limits on when she was available to the spirits on the other side, she embraced what felt like a spiritual gift. This episode is a conversation about spiritual gifts and her story. 

   https://loveyourstorypodcast.com/captivate-podcast/episode-187-spiritual-gifts-interview-deb-atella/

   Now to #2 - The second most loved episode of 2021 is the story of Michael Anthony in episode 193. Michael Anthony was born to a hyper-abusive drug addict mother who cut his finger off when he was 4-years-old, a step father you pray you never have, and a racist grandmother who pushed him into an identity crisis. By the time he was 9 his family was often homeless, certainly living in poverty, and he was eventually adopted by his grandmother. He turned to drugs and alcohol to survive the continued abuse.

   He’s the creator of Think Unbroken. This interview is all about how we heal mentally from traumatic events in our lives. He shares his story to show what it looks like to keep climbing out of the hole and do whatever it takes to heal and excel.

   https://loveyourstorypodcast.com/captivate-podcast/episode-193-think-unbroken-interview-with-michael-anthony/

   I loved my interview with Michael because I could just hear the solid sense of self in everything he shared. His insights were powerful, his overcoming incredible. This was one of my favorite episodes too.

   Now, here we are at #1 - the most downloaded episode of 2021 was Accept and Nurture your Awesome episode 184. My audience are seekers. People who want inspiration. People learning to love their story and accept their story. This episode launched 2021 with some life coach referrals and a quick discussion about leaning into nurturing our best selves. Maybe this episode was #1 because this is the starting point for all of us - self-acceptance, self-love, and healing any long-held beliefs that contribute to our false...]]>Episode 209: Best of 2021

   Best of 2021

   Welcome to the LYS Podcast! Today’s episode is one of my favorite of the year because it celebrates the listener favorites from the past year. Today we’ll hear little clips from the top five episodes of 2021. What did you guys love best? Which episodes lifted your spirits and gave you a dash of inspiration to create your best life story - whether that meant striving a little harder, living with intention, or making it through one of the muddy swamps in your life story?

   Welcome to the top 5 LYS episodes of 2021. 

   Let’s start out with #5 - Drum roll. This year you guys loved the idea of owning your own story - episode 188: Own Your Story takes us on a discussion of what it looks like to accept yourself, your life, your responsibility, and your power. 

   https://loveyourstorypodcast.com/captivate-podcast/episode-188-own-your-story/

   #4 favorite for 2021 is episode 185 My interview with Barney “Scout” Mann (trail name is Scout.) , the author of Journeys North and Pacific Crest Trail, Appalachian trail and Continental Divide through-hiker. This Triple Crown hiker has logged a lot of miles: The Pacific Crest Trail is 2650 miles long and covers 26 national forests, 7 national parks, 5 state parks and 3 national monuments. It takes 5 months at an average of 20 miles a day. The Appalachian Trail is 2180 miles and the Continental Divide Trail is 3100 miles. His book Journeys North is stories from the PCT, stories about humanity, connection, strength, companionship.

   https://loveyourstorypodcast.com/captivate-podcast/episode-185-a-story-about-life-on-the-trail-interview-barney-scout-mann/

   #3 People’s choice for 2021 is episode 187 - Spiritual Gifts with Deb Atella. In 2005 Deb had a near death experience where she saw family members who had passed away. Her experience and ability to tune into the spirit world was something that took awhile to get used to, but as she accepted the gift, put limits on when she was available to the spirits on the other side, she embraced what felt like a spiritual gift. This episode is a conversation about spiritual gifts and her story. 

   https://loveyourstorypodcast.com/captivate-podcast/episode-187-spiritual-gifts-interview-deb-atella/

   Now to #2 - The second most loved episode of 2021 is the story of Michael Anthony in episode 193. Michael Anthony was born to a hyper-abusive drug addict mother who cut his finger off when he was 4-years-old, a step father you pray you never have, and a racist grandmother who pushed him into an identity crisis. By the time he was 9 his family was often homeless, certainly living in poverty, and he was eventually adopted by his grandmother. He turned to drugs and alcohol to survive the continued abuse.

   He’s the creator of Think Unbroken. This interview is all about how we heal mentally from traumatic events in our lives. He shares his story to show what it looks like to keep climbing out of the hole and do whatever it takes to heal and excel.

   https://loveyourstorypodcast.com/captivate-podcast/episode-193-think-unbroken-interview-with-michael-anthony/

   I loved my interview with Michael because I could just hear the solid sense of self in everything he shared. His insights were powerful, his overcoming incredible. This was one of my favorite episodes too.

   Now, here we are at #1 - the most downloaded episode of 2021 was Accept and Nurture your Awesome episode 184. My audience are seekers. People who want inspiration. People learning to love their story and accept their story. This episode launched 2021 with some life coach referrals and a quick discussion about leaning into nurturing our best selves. Maybe this episode was #1 because this is the starting point for all of us - self-acceptance, self-love, and healing any long-held beliefs that contribute to our false stories of unworthiness. 

   https://loveyourstorypodcast.com/captivate-podcast/episode-184-accept-and-nurture-your-awesom/

   A huge thanks to all my listeners! You are exceptional, worthy, movers and shakers in your own lives. I applaud you for every step you take toward loving your story. And I thank you for being here on to listen to the great stories.

   If you haven’t gotten your LYS t-shirt this year, hop on the website and grab one, and then send me a picture of you, anywhere in the world, wearing your t-shirt. I love collecting these, and people love these t-shirts.

   As we end 2021 I extend my prayers and blessings for all of you and want to let you know that we have some brave, well-rounded topics coming in 2022, so stick with us and share us with the people you know. 

   Also, you can still get copies of LIFE Living Intentional and Fearless everyday for friends and loved ones as they start a new year. Gifts that show you care. Links for purchasing are on www.loveyourstorypodcast.com - for t-shirts and the book. 

   Close out 2021 with a celebration, and get ready to for all the wonderful days and weeks ahead of creating your best life story in 2022. What can you do today to create your best life story?

   ]]>b386e900-72df-4e67-b7ec-234d3eff93bdWed, 29 Dec 2021 06:30:00 -070027:04falsefull209209Lori LeeEpisode 208: What Do I Magnify?Episode 208: What Do I Magnify? Whatever I see through the magnifying glass grows bigger. It is up to me where I focus that lense. At the beginning of the year I mentioned that my focus for the year was “What I focus on Expands.” We talked about that earlier, so today’s discussion is a little different - we’re talking about magnifying. It’s a space to ask yourself, what do I magnify? I think this topic is so important because it is the very power we create our stories with. What we magnify becomes bigger for us.  If I’m focusing on all the crazy political upheaval, I’m going to be filled with the emotions that brings up in me. Maybe I’ll be full of fear, spreading stories and fears with others, spending lots of time hording TP or …. If I’m focused on the good I see in others the world is going to feel pretty nice and I’ll see the beauty and diversity in people, which will create friendships, understanding between people, create a greater space for loving. If I’m magnifying business growth or making money my I will see business opportunity, I will see networking opportunities, I will see money making opportunity. That will be the focus of my story. I’ve invited Jessica Burrell, Owner of Amplify Your Vision, to have a discussion with me about this topic - let’s say she’s going to be co-hosting with me off and on through 2022, so you’ll get to tap into her wisdom. So, I’ll introduce Jessica and then I want to start out with a story… Jessica is a Leadership and Transformational Business Coach and Owner of Amplify Your Vision Agency.. Visionary entrepreneurs & community leaders hire Jessica (and her team) to help get them feeling more on fire in their business! Because most don’t have time, systems and processes or a team. She supports them in creating client attraction and community scaling strategies as well as removing any mindset blocks in order to not feel burned out as they propel to their next level! Ultimately, she helps them create a sustainable strategy for their business, implement proven systems and processes, take action and create the space to focus on their zone of genius as well as achieve the financial freedom they desire! ​She has been growing communities for over 4 years, in both the physical and virtual space, knowing that there is nothing more powerful than a strong community of visionaries who support each other and choose collaboration over competition in order for everyone to win!   Welcome to the LYS podcast Jessica Let me jump into this story from a book I’m reading called, Be The Miracle by Regina Brett, A New York Times Best-Selling Author. And, after I’ve read this, Jess, let’s discuss the ideas. Tune into the audio program to hear our discussion about these topics: - what I focus on expands - law of attraction - how are you proving yourself right - we are always stacking evidence, which evidence are you stacking? To contact Jessica Burrell: hello@jessicaburrell.com Thank you for listening and for working to Love Your Story. Please share this episode with someone who could use it. Also, don't forget to hop over to the shop page and get your Love Your Story t-shirt and a copy of L.I.F.E - Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday!    ]]>Episode 208: What Do I Magnify? Whatever I see through the magnifying glass grows bigger. It is up to me where I focus that lense. At the beginning of the year I mentioned that my focus for the year was “What I focus on Expands.” We talked about that earlier, so today’s discussion is a little different - we’re talking about magnifying. It’s a space to ask yourself, what do I magnify? I think this topic is so important because it is the very power we create our stories with. What we magnify becomes bigger for us.  If I’m focusing on all the crazy political upheaval, I’m going to be filled with the emotions that brings up in me. Maybe I’ll be full of fear, spreading stories and fears with others, spending lots of time hording TP or …. If I’m focused on the good I see in others the world is going to feel pretty nice and I’ll see the beauty and diversity in people, which will create friendships, understanding between people, create a greater space for loving. If I’m magnifying business growth or making money my I will see business opportunity, I will see networking opportunities, I will see money making opportunity. That will be the focus of my story. I’ve invited Jessica Burrell, Owner of Amplify Your Vision, to have a discussion with me about this topic - let’s say she’s going to be co-hosting with me off and on through 2022, so you’ll get to tap into her wisdom. So, I’ll introduce Jessica and then I want to start out with a story… Jessica is a Leadership and Transformational Business Coach and Owner of Amplify Your Vision Agency.. Visionary entrepreneurs & community leaders hire Jessica (and her team) to help get them feeling more on fire in their business! Because most don’t have time, systems and processes or a team. She supports them in creating client attraction and community scaling strategies as well as removing any mindset blocks in order to not feel burned out as they propel to their next level! Ultimately, she helps them create a sustainable strategy for their business, implement proven systems and processes, take action and create the space to focus on their zone of genius as well as achieve the financial freedom they desire! ​She has been growing communities for over 4 years, in both the physical and virtual space, knowing that there is nothing more powerful than a strong community of visionaries who support each other and choose collaboration over competition in order for everyone to win!   Welcome to the LYS podcast Jessica Let me jump into this story from a book I’m reading called, Be The Miracle by Regina Brett, A New York Times Best-Selling Author. And, after I’ve read this, Jess, let’s discuss the ideas. Tune into the audio program to hear our discussion about these topics: - what I focus on expands - law of attraction - how are you proving yourself right - we are always stacking evidence, which evidence are you stacking? To contact Jessica Burrell: hello@jessicaburrell.com Thank you for listening and for working to Love Your Story. Please share this episode with someone who could use it. Also, don't forget to hop over to the shop page and get your Love Your Story t-shirt and a copy of L.I.F.E - Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday!    ]]>4fdc1d19-667a-49cb-a1c5-0971c5316aceWed, 15 Dec 2021 06:00:00 -070036:49falsefull208208Lori LeeEpisode 207 It’s All About the Love: Interview Sterling JaquithEpisode 207 It's All About the Love:

   Interview Sterling Jaquith

   
   

   Brene Brown said, “If we want to fully experience love and belonging, we must believe that we are worthy of love and belonging.” We are going to build on this idea.

   Step 1 is to believe we are worthy of love and belonging.

   
   

   Step 2 is to develop self-love

   
   

   I am currently reading a book called, Health Revelations from Heaven and Earth, by Tommy Rosa and Stephen Sinatra, MD, where Tommy shares his near-death experience and the things he was taught in while in “heaven” and one of the most important points he learned was about self-love.

   
   

   He said - 

   
   

   “To be self-loving is the foundation of divine love. Divine love flows eternally and unconditionally between God and all living beings and never waivers. But for you to truly perceive and feel divine love, there must be a foundation of self-love in your life. With this foundation you can also love others unconditionlly, as God loves you. You will be able to love without fear and without wanting. Self-love also activates the Divine Spark within you. You will become love, and you will find your life filled with miracles and possibilities. So, love yourself first - without ego - and you will be complete within.” 

   
   

   I’ve put this podcast together today because a couple things fell in line. 1. I want to feel that love because I think it’s hard to love our neighbor as God does when we don’t understand what that kind of love feels like. 2. because I am reading that book. And, 3. Because the other day I was listening to Brooke Castillo and The Life Coach School podcast and she was doing an interview with Sterling Jaquith, a Catholic Mom Life Coach that was talking the god-love, self-love talk. 

   
   

   I invited Sterling to the show, because I wanted to talk with her about these topics. You get to listen in.

   
   

   Tune into the audio program to hear our discussion on these topics:

   1. What do you think of this idea that we have to have self-love as our foundation before we can love others?
   2. What about the idea that we have to love ourselves before we can truly perceive and feel divine love? 
   3. How did you learn this concept?
   4. Have you felt God’s love in a direct way?

   
   

   
   

   There are those people who have had the opportunity to feel an actual down pour of God’s love upon them. For those who have felt that incredible, all-encompassing love, it’s hard for them to put it into words, because there is simply no earthly comparison they can draw for us. They use terms like, non-judgmental, flowing, utter peace, unconditional…sometimes we get these reports from those who have had a near-death experience, or from someone who shares a deeply personal moment where God has enveloped them in his love and let them feel it first-hand. 

   What are steps we can take to increase our self love?

   “One way to engender self-love is through forgiveness. Learning to forgive others as well as yourself…”

   
   

   To contact Sterling Jaquith:Catholic Life Coach

   
   

   www.madeforgreatness.co

   
   

   
   

   Lets just review the steps for accessing that great understanding of who we are and how much we are loved.

   
   

   #1 - as Brene Brown stated, we have to believe we are worthy of love and belonging.

   
   

   #2 Once we get that we are worthy of it, we much work to love and accept ourselves - this is what Love Your Story is all about - coming to love who you are and what you’ve been through, no matter how messy the path has been.

   
   

   #3 With these under our belt we begin to...]]>Episode 207 It's All About the Love:

   Interview Sterling Jaquith

   
   

   Brene Brown said, “If we want to fully experience love and belonging, we must believe that we are worthy of love and belonging.” We are going to build on this idea.

   Step 1 is to believe we are worthy of love and belonging.

   
   

   Step 2 is to develop self-love

   
   

   I am currently reading a book called, Health Revelations from Heaven and Earth, by Tommy Rosa and Stephen Sinatra, MD, where Tommy shares his near-death experience and the things he was taught in while in “heaven” and one of the most important points he learned was about self-love.

   
   

   He said - 

   
   

   “To be self-loving is the foundation of divine love. Divine love flows eternally and unconditionally between God and all living beings and never waivers. But for you to truly perceive and feel divine love, there must be a foundation of self-love in your life. With this foundation you can also love others unconditionlly, as God loves you. You will be able to love without fear and without wanting. Self-love also activates the Divine Spark within you. You will become love, and you will find your life filled with miracles and possibilities. So, love yourself first - without ego - and you will be complete within.” 

   
   

   I’ve put this podcast together today because a couple things fell in line. 1. I want to feel that love because I think it’s hard to love our neighbor as God does when we don’t understand what that kind of love feels like. 2. because I am reading that book. And, 3. Because the other day I was listening to Brooke Castillo and The Life Coach School podcast and she was doing an interview with Sterling Jaquith, a Catholic Mom Life Coach that was talking the god-love, self-love talk. 

   
   

   I invited Sterling to the show, because I wanted to talk with her about these topics. You get to listen in.

   
   

   Tune into the audio program to hear our discussion on these topics:

   1. What do you think of this idea that we have to have self-love as our foundation before we can love others?
   2. What about the idea that we have to love ourselves before we can truly perceive and feel divine love? 
   3. How did you learn this concept?
   4. Have you felt God’s love in a direct way?

   
   

   
   

   There are those people who have had the opportunity to feel an actual down pour of God’s love upon them. For those who have felt that incredible, all-encompassing love, it’s hard for them to put it into words, because there is simply no earthly comparison they can draw for us. They use terms like, non-judgmental, flowing, utter peace, unconditional…sometimes we get these reports from those who have had a near-death experience, or from someone who shares a deeply personal moment where God has enveloped them in his love and let them feel it first-hand. 

   What are steps we can take to increase our self love?

   “One way to engender self-love is through forgiveness. Learning to forgive others as well as yourself…”

   
   

   To contact Sterling Jaquith:Catholic Life Coach

   
   

   www.madeforgreatness.co

   
   

   
   

   Lets just review the steps for accessing that great understanding of who we are and how much we are loved.

   
   

   #1 - as Brene Brown stated, we have to believe we are worthy of love and belonging.

   
   

   #2 Once we get that we are worthy of it, we much work to love and accept ourselves - this is what Love Your Story is all about - coming to love who you are and what you’ve been through, no matter how messy the path has been.

   
   

   #3 With these under our belt we begin to access divine love, which helps us to love ourselves even more, to love others better, to begin to feel God’s divine love for us. 

   
   

   Your challenge for this week is to check in with yourself. Do you believe that you are worthy of love? Do you accept and love YOU? Ask a few searching questions - how does knowing your own worth help you love others better? 

   
   

   As we close out 2021 I want to remind you to pick up your Love Your Story t-shirt and then send me photos of you in it as you do your story! I get pics from all over the place, and I love it. Also, remember you can share these podcasts with friends and family and create a little support and love for each other just by sharing an inspirational link. 

   ]]>e96bd2d2-6a57-410b-9b6b-05cec928322cWed, 01 Dec 2021 06:00:00 -070041:22falsefull207207Lori LeeEpisode 206: A Doable, Enjoyable Guide to Living the Life You Want – Interview Danielle DinkelmanEpisode 206: A Doable, Enjoyable Guide to Living the Life You Want - Interview Danielle Dinkelman

   If Diets don’t work, What does? - A doable, enjoyable guide to living the life you want.

   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today’s episode is about how to create real change when we want to. It’s about our health and lifestyle. Now before you tune out because it’s been done a million times, let me tell you what’s different….Danielle Dinkelman was referred to me by a fellow podcast host. I liked the idea of intentionally creating a healthy lifestyle, but everyone has an angle on this. The reason I took a look at her book  “If diets don’t work, what does.” was because I was coming up hard agains the Covid 15 pound weight gain. But there are a couple things I know about myself - 1st - I’ve never had to diet, I don’t. I don’t own a scale. If I tell myself I can have some food I will inevitably eat 3 or 4 more times of that food than I normally would. It is completely unrealistic for me to even pretend for one moment that I’m going to ever go on a diet. I also know I have to manage who I am, not try to will power my way into anything. I’ve also had a hard time getting myself to go to the gym no matter how many times I’ve put it on my calendar. So…..long story short, what did Danielle Dinkelman have to say that hadn’t been said before and would it actually be useful? She sent me her book. I read it because I was feeling a little desperate to get back into my really cool hiking shorts that I’d only had for one season before Covid his and I sat around on my butt, in front of my computer in Zoom meetings for a year. I read it to see if it would be worthy of you, my audience.    Tune in for a couple really strong ideas that will work for everyone….. Danielle is in the house. Let's talk about how  we create a healthy eating and exercising lifestyle we will enjoy - one not filled with desperation? To contact Danielle or buy her book:

   Danielle Dinkelman, NBC-HWC

   National Board Certified Health & Wellness Coach

   Spark Health Coaching, LLC

   www.danielledinkelman.com

   youtube.com/healthylivingwithdanielledinkelman

    

   I think living your best life on purpose definitely includes taking care of your body. It is the case that houses your spirit and when you feel good, you rock things. Feeling good is important, and the greatest chance of creating a lifestyle that is healthy is to have realistic expectations and to create habits that you are excited about. Fun habits and eating that serve you rather than feel like handcuffs. There are good foods we like, and exercises and movements we are more drawn to than others. We CAN create healthy lifestyles that serve us. Your challenge for this week is to take a look at the habits you have around food or exercise and see if they need to be...]]>Episode 206: A Doable, Enjoyable Guide to Living the Life You Want - Interview Danielle Dinkelman

   If Diets don’t work, What does? - A doable, enjoyable guide to living the life you want.

   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today’s episode is about how to create real change when we want to. It’s about our health and lifestyle. Now before you tune out because it’s been done a million times, let me tell you what’s different….Danielle Dinkelman was referred to me by a fellow podcast host. I liked the idea of intentionally creating a healthy lifestyle, but everyone has an angle on this. The reason I took a look at her book  “If diets don’t work, what does.” was because I was coming up hard agains the Covid 15 pound weight gain. But there are a couple things I know about myself - 1st - I’ve never had to diet, I don’t. I don’t own a scale. If I tell myself I can have some food I will inevitably eat 3 or 4 more times of that food than I normally would. It is completely unrealistic for me to even pretend for one moment that I’m going to ever go on a diet. I also know I have to manage who I am, not try to will power my way into anything. I’ve also had a hard time getting myself to go to the gym no matter how many times I’ve put it on my calendar. So…..long story short, what did Danielle Dinkelman have to say that hadn’t been said before and would it actually be useful? She sent me her book. I read it because I was feeling a little desperate to get back into my really cool hiking shorts that I’d only had for one season before Covid his and I sat around on my butt, in front of my computer in Zoom meetings for a year. I read it to see if it would be worthy of you, my audience.    Tune in for a couple really strong ideas that will work for everyone….. Danielle is in the house. Let's talk about how  we create a healthy eating and exercising lifestyle we will enjoy - one not filled with desperation? To contact Danielle or buy her book:

   Danielle Dinkelman, NBC-HWC

   National Board Certified Health & Wellness Coach

   Spark Health Coaching, LLC

   www.danielledinkelman.com

   youtube.com/healthylivingwithdanielledinkelman

    

   I think living your best life on purpose definitely includes taking care of your body. It is the case that houses your spirit and when you feel good, you rock things. Feeling good is important, and the greatest chance of creating a lifestyle that is healthy is to have realistic expectations and to create habits that you are excited about. Fun habits and eating that serve you rather than feel like handcuffs. There are good foods we like, and exercises and movements we are more drawn to than others. We CAN create healthy lifestyles that serve us. Your challenge for this week is to take a look at the habits you have around food or exercise and see if they need to be replaced. Then consider a healthy food or movement you would really enjoy that it would be fun to create a new habit around. It’s a great place to start. And, if you need help you can call Danielle. Thanks for being here - Live your best life on purpose! Create habits that serve YOU! Start the new year intentionally and in charge of your own life. See you in two weeks. Share this podcast with someone who would enjoy it.]]>08f21991-4ac9-4dd2-92b5-11e9cc732a05Wed, 17 Nov 2021 07:00:00 -070037:02falsefull206206Lori LeeEpisode 205: You Do You – Live Your Own Colorful StoryEpisode 205: You Do You - Live Your Own Colorful Story   The other day I was emailing with a woman who said she was really concerned about her granddaughter. She was trying to teach her granddaughter - or encourage her - to do her own life. You Do You! She said infatically. I wondered which podcast episode might be a support to her granddaughter, and I suggested a couple, but I realized we talk about this all the time, in lots of different stories, but wouldn’t it be fun to have one episode that brought some of those together. This is our You Do You episode. Stay tuned for lots of fun thoughts on overcoming the stigmas that hold us back, the power to change our circumstances, samples on what it looks like to customize your life, and let’s create our own magic as we live our own bright, magical, individual lives. Sometimes our lives are unexpected - always. In fact if was this very question “Did your life turn out as you expected” that was the first Love Your Story research project. 19 out of 20 peoples lives did NOT turn out as they expected. That’s perfectly normal. But as we seek to live our own big lives - as we struggle to find our way, often times there are a couple things we must accept: 1. We need to accept who we are fully (accept and love ourselves) and where we’ve been (all the good and the bad. All the blessings and the set-backs). 2. We are responsible for creating the life we want for ourselves. No one else gets to be blamed for what we create or don’t create. 3. Our life experiences, talents and the things that light us up qualify us to do what we came to do and be who we came to be. Your magic and living into what you love will help you live big. Tune into the audio program to hear the clips highlighted below.  Here is a clip from episode 104 with Taunia Dawn Terry and a bit about how she found her path. Our experience gives us insight that makes us uniquely qualified to do certain things. You can change when you don’t like where you are at. What she called the divine right not to settle. And as we change and grow we come to know ourselves better and what works for us.  One of the road blocks we run into as we navigate our culture and desire to be accepted is that of what others think of us. Here is a clip from Laurann Turner’s story in episode 127, where she talks about this struggle for her and coming to understand that she didn’t want to settle. As she became aware of the control other’s approval had on her, she could also shift instead of stay stuck. To live our full destiny, or simply to create our own happiness, there is the novel idea of taking it a step further - actually thinking outside the box of cultural, familial, religions, etc. expectation to find a path that works for us - an individual solution - even if it deviates.  Here is Rebecca Dahl in episode 132 and our discussion about the book Deviate. This illustrates the idea in a super interesting way. At the core of everything we are talking about customizing our lives. In episode 133 I spoke with Erik and Emily Orton about their 5000 mile trip across the Caribbean and how they got there and what it took to go the distance in this radical customization. Marvin Cassler, as you’ll hear, is the premier example of living everyday in a very unconventional way. His example of thinking outside the box in order to live life on his own terms, is one of the most radical I’ve heard. What does You Do You look like to you? Is it sailing the Caribbean, living in a storage shed, creating a marriage on unusual terms, or quitting a job and starting over? Is it learning more about you so you know what you want to create? Is it creating courage to do it your...]]>Episode 205: You Do You - Live Your Own Colorful Story   The other day I was emailing with a woman who said she was really concerned about her granddaughter. She was trying to teach her granddaughter - or encourage her - to do her own life. You Do You! She said infatically. I wondered which podcast episode might be a support to her granddaughter, and I suggested a couple, but I realized we talk about this all the time, in lots of different stories, but wouldn’t it be fun to have one episode that brought some of those together. This is our You Do You episode. Stay tuned for lots of fun thoughts on overcoming the stigmas that hold us back, the power to change our circumstances, samples on what it looks like to customize your life, and let’s create our own magic as we live our own bright, magical, individual lives. Sometimes our lives are unexpected - always. In fact if was this very question “Did your life turn out as you expected” that was the first Love Your Story research project. 19 out of 20 peoples lives did NOT turn out as they expected. That’s perfectly normal. But as we seek to live our own big lives - as we struggle to find our way, often times there are a couple things we must accept: 1. We need to accept who we are fully (accept and love ourselves) and where we’ve been (all the good and the bad. All the blessings and the set-backs). 2. We are responsible for creating the life we want for ourselves. No one else gets to be blamed for what we create or don’t create. 3. Our life experiences, talents and the things that light us up qualify us to do what we came to do and be who we came to be. Your magic and living into what you love will help you live big. Tune into the audio program to hear the clips highlighted below.  Here is a clip from episode 104 with Taunia Dawn Terry and a bit about how she found her path. Our experience gives us insight that makes us uniquely qualified to do certain things. You can change when you don’t like where you are at. What she called the divine right not to settle. And as we change and grow we come to know ourselves better and what works for us.  One of the road blocks we run into as we navigate our culture and desire to be accepted is that of what others think of us. Here is a clip from Laurann Turner’s story in episode 127, where she talks about this struggle for her and coming to understand that she didn’t want to settle. As she became aware of the control other’s approval had on her, she could also shift instead of stay stuck. To live our full destiny, or simply to create our own happiness, there is the novel idea of taking it a step further - actually thinking outside the box of cultural, familial, religions, etc. expectation to find a path that works for us - an individual solution - even if it deviates.  Here is Rebecca Dahl in episode 132 and our discussion about the book Deviate. This illustrates the idea in a super interesting way. At the core of everything we are talking about customizing our lives. In episode 133 I spoke with Erik and Emily Orton about their 5000 mile trip across the Caribbean and how they got there and what it took to go the distance in this radical customization. Marvin Cassler, as you’ll hear, is the premier example of living everyday in a very unconventional way. His example of thinking outside the box in order to live life on his own terms, is one of the most radical I’ve heard. What does You Do You look like to you? Is it sailing the Caribbean, living in a storage shed, creating a marriage on unusual terms, or quitting a job and starting over? Is it learning more about you so you know what you want to create? Is it creating courage to do it your way despite the expectations of others?  I truly believe that we are all individual lights. We all have our own set of talents, skills, natural ways of being, and that color and magic that we are is needed in the world. When we don’t live true to ourselves we stunt our own growth and we deprive the world of all the light we can shine. Your challenge this week is to consider what popped into your mind as you listened to these stories. You know what section of your intentional living might need to be tweaked. Do it! Live bright with no regrets.  Thanks for being here. If you liked the show, please leave a review - it just takes a second. And, we’ll see you in two weeks for the next episode that supports your intentional and inspirational living. Go to loveyourstorypodcast.com for more information on our 21 Life Challenge Groups. Let’s get your group started.]]>e71e0a8e-0e91-42c7-878b-0935bbbb16aeWed, 03 Nov 2021 07:00:00 -070032:22falsefull205205Lori LeeEpisode 204: A Look at Adapting – Interview with Kimber CrossEpisode 204: A Look at Adapting - Interview Kimber Cross Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast where we sit around this technological campfire and share stories of doing hard and fabulous things, shining a light on overcoming road blocks for living our best lives on purpose.  Today’s guest, Kimber Cross, is an adaptive athlete from Tacoma, Washington. Born without fingers on her right hand, Kimber didn’t let that slow her down. From the time she was young her athletic spirit always found a way. Today Kimber is an avid alpinist who climbs routes up the volcanoes of the Northwest, as well as peaks of the Cascades and Olympics. The past 3 years she’s been focused on ice climbing using a custom prosthetic Petzl ice tool.  Stay tuned for her story of what it was like growing up without fingers on your right hand, how she’s adapted and excelled, and what she’s learned from the journey. Tune in to the audio program to hear Kimber's experiences as she shows us what it looks like to adapt. To follow Kimber: Instagram: @kimberbelle   We all have obstacles in our individual lives. These obstacles are as individual to each of us as our lives are. Some of these obstacles are more obvious to others - like not having a hand, while other obstacles may be deep grief, loss, hidden abuse, depression, anxiety, etc. etc. These challenges make us stronger as we face them. Could Kimber have played small and afraid, not risking, feeling handicapped. Trying to stay hidden? She could have, and so can we as we face our obstacles, but we also have the much better choice to square our shoulders, look straight at the challenge, and one day at a time, one choice at a time, get strong. It’s always a choice. Your challenge for this week is to consider the something in your life you need to gain some strength around. That thing you know gives you lots of growth opportunities, and take one strengthening step toward it and away from a story that limits you. Thanks for being here with us today. We’ll see you in 2 weeks for the next fabulous episode. Go live big!]]>Episode 204: A Look at Adapting - Interview Kimber Cross Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast where we sit around this technological campfire and share stories of doing hard and fabulous things, shining a light on overcoming road blocks for living our best lives on purpose.  Today’s guest, Kimber Cross, is an adaptive athlete from Tacoma, Washington. Born without fingers on her right hand, Kimber didn’t let that slow her down. From the time she was young her athletic spirit always found a way. Today Kimber is an avid alpinist who climbs routes up the volcanoes of the Northwest, as well as peaks of the Cascades and Olympics. The past 3 years she’s been focused on ice climbing using a custom prosthetic Petzl ice tool.  Stay tuned for her story of what it was like growing up without fingers on your right hand, how she’s adapted and excelled, and what she’s learned from the journey. Tune in to the audio program to hear Kimber's experiences as she shows us what it looks like to adapt. To follow Kimber: Instagram: @kimberbelle   We all have obstacles in our individual lives. These obstacles are as individual to each of us as our lives are. Some of these obstacles are more obvious to others - like not having a hand, while other obstacles may be deep grief, loss, hidden abuse, depression, anxiety, etc. etc. These challenges make us stronger as we face them. Could Kimber have played small and afraid, not risking, feeling handicapped. Trying to stay hidden? She could have, and so can we as we face our obstacles, but we also have the much better choice to square our shoulders, look straight at the challenge, and one day at a time, one choice at a time, get strong. It’s always a choice. Your challenge for this week is to consider the something in your life you need to gain some strength around. That thing you know gives you lots of growth opportunities, and take one strengthening step toward it and away from a story that limits you. Thanks for being here with us today. We’ll see you in 2 weeks for the next fabulous episode. Go live big!]]>072af002-f66d-4b8b-aa38-a74836448f0bWed, 20 Oct 2021 07:00:00 -070041:55falsefull204204Lori LeeEpisode 203: Today You Choose - It's all about Family: Interview Jason MartinEpisode 203: Today You Choose - It's all about Family: Interview Jason Martin

   This is Your Captain Speaking - Life Lessons from the Journey So Far

   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. How often have you thought about the importance of intentionally making your family - the people you love - the most important thing in your life? Not just in word and intention, but in actuality? 

   On today’s show I’m talking with Jason Martin, the author or This is your Captain Speaking - Life Lessons from the Journey so far. As I read his book it was easy to sum up the entire premise - Make Your Family Your Top Priority, and the intentionality of making memories, recording memories, sharing memories with loved ones.

   In this heartwarming book he wrote to his family, Jason Martin takes us on a journey inside his life as a husband, father, provider, and a family leader. You will watch as he shows you how to create a life filled with memories that your children will remember for the rest of their lives. By creating a legacy built on the foundations of love, hope, and gratitude, your family will learn critical life lessons to become the best versions of everything they can be. —-This is what we are all about on the Love Your Story podcast - intentionally creating the life we want on purpose. Stay tuned for my discussion with Jason - the Captain of his family, and I think you’ll leave with some ideas for your own intentional family living.

   Jason Martin has not experience as a writer, in fact he failed copy editing in college, but he is a believer in dreams and stretching. He is a former sports anchor and currently runs one of the most successful real estate teams in Washington D.C., but above all, his family is his #1 priority. He and his wife Jennifer have 3 human children and a dog named Scooby, and together they live a fun, wild, everyday normal life. Jason writes this book specifically to his family, addressing them in unexpected places. There is not question we are peaking into a compilation he wrote for his family, but in that compilation we see what it looks like to put family first. There is no doubt he wishes to teach, support and leave a legacy for his kids.

   Tune in to the audio program to hear my discussion with Jason. You don't want to miss it.

   You start out your book with “Anyone who knows me will tell you that above all else comes family.” Let’s start out with why….

   To contact Jason or buy his book:

   todayyouchoose.com

   jason@jasonmartingroup.com

   https://www.amazon.com/This-Your-Captain-Speaking-Lessons/dp/1954801009/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1625763215&sr=8-2

   The last section of this book has a list of 9 final lessons. I wanted to end with 3 of them that I liked. #1 - Consistency: Consistency is required for success in life. As you create your best life story on purpose be consistent with those things that really matter. Consistently be there - show up. Consistently be kind. Consistently listen. Consistently sit down and tackle that project. Intentionality requires consistency. #2 What you tell yourself matters - here we are back to the idea that the stories you tell yourself are the most powerful stories you will ever tell. If your self-talk is uplifting and supportive you’ll fly. #3 Ideas to Action - as you intentionally plan what you want in your story you’ll start with an idea. If you don’t put that idea into action it won’t happen. So remember, intentionally living requires you to take action. Even if it takes years to show up. 

   Your challenge for this week is to think about your family. Think about the priority they are for you and see if your actions are aligned with where that priority sits in your mind and heart. All these ideas we’ve discussed today are ideas you can teach...]]>Episode 203: Today You Choose - It's all about Family: Interview Jason Martin

   This is Your Captain Speaking - Life Lessons from the Journey So Far

   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. How often have you thought about the importance of intentionally making your family - the people you love - the most important thing in your life? Not just in word and intention, but in actuality? 

   On today’s show I’m talking with Jason Martin, the author or This is your Captain Speaking - Life Lessons from the Journey so far. As I read his book it was easy to sum up the entire premise - Make Your Family Your Top Priority, and the intentionality of making memories, recording memories, sharing memories with loved ones.

   In this heartwarming book he wrote to his family, Jason Martin takes us on a journey inside his life as a husband, father, provider, and a family leader. You will watch as he shows you how to create a life filled with memories that your children will remember for the rest of their lives. By creating a legacy built on the foundations of love, hope, and gratitude, your family will learn critical life lessons to become the best versions of everything they can be. —-This is what we are all about on the Love Your Story podcast - intentionally creating the life we want on purpose. Stay tuned for my discussion with Jason - the Captain of his family, and I think you’ll leave with some ideas for your own intentional family living.

   Jason Martin has not experience as a writer, in fact he failed copy editing in college, but he is a believer in dreams and stretching. He is a former sports anchor and currently runs one of the most successful real estate teams in Washington D.C., but above all, his family is his #1 priority. He and his wife Jennifer have 3 human children and a dog named Scooby, and together they live a fun, wild, everyday normal life. Jason writes this book specifically to his family, addressing them in unexpected places. There is not question we are peaking into a compilation he wrote for his family, but in that compilation we see what it looks like to put family first. There is no doubt he wishes to teach, support and leave a legacy for his kids.

   Tune in to the audio program to hear my discussion with Jason. You don't want to miss it.

   You start out your book with “Anyone who knows me will tell you that above all else comes family.” Let’s start out with why….

   To contact Jason or buy his book:

   todayyouchoose.com

   jason@jasonmartingroup.com

   https://www.amazon.com/This-Your-Captain-Speaking-Lessons/dp/1954801009/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1625763215&sr=8-2

   The last section of this book has a list of 9 final lessons. I wanted to end with 3 of them that I liked. #1 - Consistency: Consistency is required for success in life. As you create your best life story on purpose be consistent with those things that really matter. Consistently be there - show up. Consistently be kind. Consistently listen. Consistently sit down and tackle that project. Intentionality requires consistency. #2 What you tell yourself matters - here we are back to the idea that the stories you tell yourself are the most powerful stories you will ever tell. If your self-talk is uplifting and supportive you’ll fly. #3 Ideas to Action - as you intentionally plan what you want in your story you’ll start with an idea. If you don’t put that idea into action it won’t happen. So remember, intentionally living requires you to take action. Even if it takes years to show up. 

   Your challenge for this week is to think about your family. Think about the priority they are for you and see if your actions are aligned with where that priority sits in your mind and heart. All these ideas we’ve discussed today are ideas you can teach your family. Kids and help parents understand new ideas and parents should absolutely teach children how to live intentionally. If there is something you can tweak this week to help your kids learn an idea, know they are your priority, or just create a little family love. Do it.

   Thanks for being here. If you liked the show, please leave us a review on apple podcasts or wherever you listen. See you in two weeks. 

   ]]>68b2f2e0-d7dd-412e-9ba3-f913d47ee43cWed, 06 Oct 2021 07:00:00 -070038:21falsefull203203Lori LeeEpisode 202: Challenge #19 Meditation: Interview Andrea CarverEpisode 202: Challenge #19 Meditation: Interview Andrea Carver We create. Everyday we create connection, chaos, possibility, drama, conversation, expectations, money, homes, relationships, works of art, friction, love, stories, or we don’t… Our power lies in our ability to direct our life story with every choice  and every thought. Welcome to the 21 Challenges - 21 life hacks that have been set up to help you connect, take care of self, create possibility, and get out of the dol drums.  This series of podcasts highlights the challenges one-by-one to give you background on why the challenge was included in the 21, a deeper understanding of the concept itself, and ideas on how to implement it. These simple challenges create big ah-ha’s and leave you with some great new tools to play with. Today we focus on Challenge #19 - Meditate. Take 20 minutes to meditate today. Find a quiet place, quiet your mind, focus on your breathing and let everything rest for the moment.  It has been proven that those who meditate regularly have increased energy, increased presence of mind, and even increased health and intellect. There are many forms of meditation. For this challenge, choose one that works for you, but the idea is that you will absolutely, definitely, spend 20 minutes slowing down and trying it out. As a special gift and guest today I’m bring your Andrea Carver, a long time meditator and meditation specialist. Tune into the audio program to hear the answers to questions such as: Why meditate? What does meditating look like? There are so many types of meditation. What types do you suggest? What do you find when you meditate? Some thoughts/quotes on meditation: “Your goal is not to battle with the mind, but to witness the mind.” – Swami Muktananda “Feelings come and go like clouds in a windy sky. Conscious breathing is my anchor.” – Thich Nhat Hahn "Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment." -- Buddha "Nowhere can man find a quieter or more untroubled retreat than in his own soul." --Marcus Aurelius Andrea Carver provides a 15 minuted guided meditation in the audio program to help you get started.]]>Episode 202: Challenge #19 Meditation: Interview Andrea Carver We create. Everyday we create connection, chaos, possibility, drama, conversation, expectations, money, homes, relationships, works of art, friction, love, stories, or we don’t… Our power lies in our ability to direct our life story with every choice  and every thought. Welcome to the 21 Challenges - 21 life hacks that have been set up to help you connect, take care of self, create possibility, and get out of the dol drums.  This series of podcasts highlights the challenges one-by-one to give you background on why the challenge was included in the 21, a deeper understanding of the concept itself, and ideas on how to implement it. These simple challenges create big ah-ha’s and leave you with some great new tools to play with. Today we focus on Challenge #19 - Meditate. Take 20 minutes to meditate today. Find a quiet place, quiet your mind, focus on your breathing and let everything rest for the moment.  It has been proven that those who meditate regularly have increased energy, increased presence of mind, and even increased health and intellect. There are many forms of meditation. For this challenge, choose one that works for you, but the idea is that you will absolutely, definitely, spend 20 minutes slowing down and trying it out. As a special gift and guest today I’m bring your Andrea Carver, a long time meditator and meditation specialist. Tune into the audio program to hear the answers to questions such as: Why meditate? What does meditating look like? There are so many types of meditation. What types do you suggest? What do you find when you meditate? Some thoughts/quotes on meditation: “Your goal is not to battle with the mind, but to witness the mind.” – Swami Muktananda “Feelings come and go like clouds in a windy sky. Conscious breathing is my anchor.” – Thich Nhat Hahn "Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment." -- Buddha "Nowhere can man find a quieter or more untroubled retreat than in his own soul." --Marcus Aurelius Andrea Carver provides a 15 minuted guided meditation in the audio program to help you get started.]]>c17e338f-1461-4a3b-8ad0-e02858a56c9cWed, 22 Sep 2021 08:00:00 -070033:30falsefull202202Lori LeeEpisode 201: Iditarod Trail Invitational - 350 Miles of Self-Sustained Running in the Alaskan Wilderness: Interview - Austin HansenEpisode 201: Iditarod Trail Invitational - 350 Miles of Self-Sustained Running in the Alaskan Wilderness: Interview - Austin Hansen The Iditarod Trail Invitational is the world's longest running winter ultra-marathon. One of the most challenging experiences on the planet, participants brave extreme physical, environmental and mental challenges as they travel along the historic Iditarod Trail on bicycle, foot or skis. Requiring self-sufficiency and the considerable resilience to make it through up to 30 frozen days and nights, the Iditarod Trail Invitational has built its reputation on notoriously inhospitable conditions and minimal outside support. For its participants, the Iditarod Trail Invitational is a measure of human willpower like no other. On today’s show I bring you Austin Hansen, a man who was not only invited, but succeeded in completing the Iditarod Trail Invitational 350 this year in 2021 -  thats 350 Miles of self-sustained, snow laden, torture, in my book. Tune in to the audio program to hear about his adventure, the reasons he does it, and what he’s learned. Austin Hansen has spent the last 5 years running marathons - 15 marathons, 8 Ultras, and 3 full triathlons, but this year he took a giant step into Winter Ultra Marathons. Welcome to the show. To contact Austin: Instagram: austwhansen Email: austinHansen8@gmail.com While we may not all be ready to hop a plane to Alaska to traverse the frozen tundra for hundreds of miles unsupported, we each have challenging paths. Hearing stories of how people embrace these types of physical challenges serve as motivation and example for what it looks like to really put your whole heart and soul into self-discipline, focus, pushing yourself, and being strong when everything in you wants to quit. For one person it may be on a physical level, for another it may be emotional or mental, sometimes it’s both. Thank you Austin for sharing your storyl. Your challenge this week is to look at the biggest challenge in your life right now and think about what you’ve heard today. How can you stay the path?  Have a great week and as we sign off, here’s a word from the show sponsor, the 21-Life Connection Challenges that can help you and people your work with, live with, or play with join together for personal growth and connection:  ]]>Episode 201: Iditarod Trail Invitational - 350 Miles of Self-Sustained Running in the Alaskan Wilderness: Interview - Austin Hansen The Iditarod Trail Invitational is the world's longest running winter ultra-marathon. One of the most challenging experiences on the planet, participants brave extreme physical, environmental and mental challenges as they travel along the historic Iditarod Trail on bicycle, foot or skis. Requiring self-sufficiency and the considerable resilience to make it through up to 30 frozen days and nights, the Iditarod Trail Invitational has built its reputation on notoriously inhospitable conditions and minimal outside support. For its participants, the Iditarod Trail Invitational is a measure of human willpower like no other. On today’s show I bring you Austin Hansen, a man who was not only invited, but succeeded in completing the Iditarod Trail Invitational 350 this year in 2021 -  thats 350 Miles of self-sustained, snow laden, torture, in my book. Tune in to the audio program to hear about his adventure, the reasons he does it, and what he’s learned. Austin Hansen has spent the last 5 years running marathons - 15 marathons, 8 Ultras, and 3 full triathlons, but this year he took a giant step into Winter Ultra Marathons. Welcome to the show. To contact Austin: Instagram: austwhansen Email: austinHansen8@gmail.com While we may not all be ready to hop a plane to Alaska to traverse the frozen tundra for hundreds of miles unsupported, we each have challenging paths. Hearing stories of how people embrace these types of physical challenges serve as motivation and example for what it looks like to really put your whole heart and soul into self-discipline, focus, pushing yourself, and being strong when everything in you wants to quit. For one person it may be on a physical level, for another it may be emotional or mental, sometimes it’s both. Thank you Austin for sharing your storyl. Your challenge this week is to look at the biggest challenge in your life right now and think about what you’ve heard today. How can you stay the path?  Have a great week and as we sign off, here’s a word from the show sponsor, the 21-Life Connection Challenges that can help you and people your work with, live with, or play with join together for personal growth and connection:  ]]>40ea215e-77a6-4351-a468-15f1cf2d6227Wed, 08 Sep 2021 08:00:00 -070035:37falsefull201201Lori LeeEpisode 200: Use Your Stories to Find Your Ideal Career – Interview Kerri TwiggEpisode 200: Use Your Stories to Find Your Ideal Career - Interview Kerri Twigg The Love Your Story podcast is about loving your story on all levels. Today we explore a new level - how to use story to find your best and most satisfying career - and we’ll start with the stories we tell about ourselves….no really, not just in theory and how those stories affect our self confidence, but these stories are the foundation for The Career Stories Method, by Kerri Twigg, as she helps us narrow in on the career stories we have and how to use them to get into your ideal work.    My interview with Kerri takes a look at her 11 step method for finding or creating your perfect career, and how to use your stories in your cover letter, resume, and online postings.   Before I interview authors I always try to read their books to make sure they are a good fit for my audience and that their work is legit. I got Kerri’s book - The Career Stories Method, from her PR firm 2 weeks ago, and while I was not sure I’d make it through it in time for the interview I jumped in. As I read I discovered that the steps were interesting, thought provoking, and I started doing the work and considering my own stories as I read along. I’ve sticky notes poking out of many pages and I’ve got my 3x5 cards with my stories in a little stack. She’s legit. Kerri Twigg is the founder and operator of Career Stories. Though courses and coaching she helps people use their stories to grow their careers, or find their ideal work. She’s worked for 20 years helping people find out what makes them awesome and how that helps their career.    “A resume is where you put your most incredible stories in one place in order to open up opportunities.” —Kerri Twigg on her Ted Talk   Tune into our interview for the 11 Steps to finding your ideal career and for my talk with Kerri about her story. To contact Kerri: www.career-stories.com TEDx Talk - Burn Your Old Resume Her Book: The Career Stories Method: 11 Steps to Find Your Ideal Career - and Discover Your Awesome Self in the Process I love a couple things about the Career Story Method. The first is that it’s a process of discovering your awesome self. It guides us through a detailed look at the things we really shine at, and that’s a fun journey. The second is the focus on the power of story, which is, of course, what this entire podcast is set up for, to help remind you how important our stories our - our stories, the ones we tell ourselves about ourselves, about other people, about our lives and situations. These will bring us happiness or misery. Stories help us illustrate to others our experience and help others share with us their experiences - it’s how we find our way down the human path. Kerri has methodized a way to using your stories to bless you and your path. She says she does this process every year, and encourages us to do the same. I found it a very interesting process, I’d recommend it. Especially if you need a change, but even if you don’t it helps you really dial in on what you’re good at. - And who doesn’t want a little more of that. See you in two weeks for the next episode of the Love Your Story podcast.]]>Episode 200: Use Your Stories to Find Your Ideal Career - Interview Kerri Twigg The Love Your Story podcast is about loving your story on all levels. Today we explore a new level - how to use story to find your best and most satisfying career - and we’ll start with the stories we tell about ourselves….no really, not just in theory and how those stories affect our self confidence, but these stories are the foundation for The Career Stories Method, by Kerri Twigg, as she helps us narrow in on the career stories we have and how to use them to get into your ideal work.    My interview with Kerri takes a look at her 11 step method for finding or creating your perfect career, and how to use your stories in your cover letter, resume, and online postings.   Before I interview authors I always try to read their books to make sure they are a good fit for my audience and that their work is legit. I got Kerri’s book - The Career Stories Method, from her PR firm 2 weeks ago, and while I was not sure I’d make it through it in time for the interview I jumped in. As I read I discovered that the steps were interesting, thought provoking, and I started doing the work and considering my own stories as I read along. I’ve sticky notes poking out of many pages and I’ve got my 3x5 cards with my stories in a little stack. She’s legit. Kerri Twigg is the founder and operator of Career Stories. Though courses and coaching she helps people use their stories to grow their careers, or find their ideal work. She’s worked for 20 years helping people find out what makes them awesome and how that helps their career.    “A resume is where you put your most incredible stories in one place in order to open up opportunities.” —Kerri Twigg on her Ted Talk   Tune into our interview for the 11 Steps to finding your ideal career and for my talk with Kerri about her story. To contact Kerri: www.career-stories.com TEDx Talk - Burn Your Old Resume Her Book: The Career Stories Method: 11 Steps to Find Your Ideal Career - and Discover Your Awesome Self in the Process I love a couple things about the Career Story Method. The first is that it’s a process of discovering your awesome self. It guides us through a detailed look at the things we really shine at, and that’s a fun journey. The second is the focus on the power of story, which is, of course, what this entire podcast is set up for, to help remind you how important our stories our - our stories, the ones we tell ourselves about ourselves, about other people, about our lives and situations. These will bring us happiness or misery. Stories help us illustrate to others our experience and help others share with us their experiences - it’s how we find our way down the human path. Kerri has methodized a way to using your stories to bless you and your path. She says she does this process every year, and encourages us to do the same. I found it a very interesting process, I’d recommend it. Especially if you need a change, but even if you don’t it helps you really dial in on what you’re good at. - And who doesn’t want a little more of that. See you in two weeks for the next episode of the Love Your Story podcast.]]>25ba359c-8a53-4748-8f55-e763e0307872Wed, 25 Aug 2021 08:00:00 -070030:41falsefull200200Lori LeeChallenge #16 - Free HugsEpisode 199: Challenge #16 - Free Hugs

   We create. Everyday we create connection, chaos, possibility, drama, conversation, expectations, money, homes, relationships, works of art, friction, love, stories, or we don’t…

   Our power lies in our ability to direct our life story with every choice and every thought.

   Welcome to the 21 Challenges - 21 life hacks that have been set up to help you connect, take care of your beautiful self, create possibility, and get out of the dol drums. 

   This series of podcasts highlights the challenges one-by-one to give you background on why the challenge was included in the 21, a deeper understanding of the concept itself, and ideas on how to implement it. These simple challenges create big ah-ha’s and leave you with some great new tools to play with.

   Today we focus on Challenge # 16 - Give Free Hugs…stay tuned for some loving, touching, feeling. 

    

   Let’s start out with some wisdom from Oprah. Love that lady. She said, “When you make loving others the story of your life, there’s never a final chapter, because the legacy continues. You lend your light to one person and he or she shines it on another and another and another. And I know for sure that in the final analysis of our lives—when the to-do lists are no more, when the frenzy is finished, when our email inboxes are empty—the only. Thing that will have any lasting value is whether we’ve loved others and whether they loved us.”

   During the Covid upheaval touch became a thing carefully guarded. That makes this challenge even more pertinent now because we are all a little touch deprived…. even if you have to get creative.

   In a world where we can feel alone in a sea of a million people, the chance to hold another’s hand or to be hugged, can be a gift, an anchor, a place where for that moment you are not alone. For that moment you are joining forces. A hug is a human action that allows us to connect, communicate, and exchange energy in a meaningful way. For however long the moment lasts we are unafraid to touch, and that is a beautiful moment; and important moment. In fact, science shows it’s an absolutely crucial moment that must be repeated often.

   In Greater Good Magazine, out of Berkley, an article called, Why Physical Touch Matters for our Well Being said, “The science of touch came of age in the mid-1990s, when two scientists traveled to Romania to examine the sensory deprivation of children in understaffed orphanages. The touch-deprived children, they found, had strikingly lower cortisol and growth development levels for their age group. From the time we are in the womb through our elderly years, touch plays a primary role in our development and physical and mental well-being. New studies on touch continue to show the importance of physical contact in early development, communication, personal relationships, and fighting disease. Although the therapeutic benefits have become increasingly clear, scientists argues that, thanks to no-touch policies in schools and the isolating effects of cell phones and computers, (and now Covid) Americans are touching each other less.” 

   That makes this challenge even more important.

   In that article, they had some specific research on hugging: “They injected a cold germ into these people who were in the study, and those who had more hugs had a better immune response to the cold virus. (So, touch helps us fight disease.) And then [there are] some studies showing that if you get hugged by your partner before a stressful condition like giving a speech or doing math problems, people do better. Performance is better if they’ve been hugged by a partner before the stress.”

   In 2016, I found myself in Ohio doing this emotional intelligence training I speak of so often. Let me tell you about my experience setting up a Free Hugs stand.

   Tune in to hear...]]>Episode 199: Challenge #16 - Free Hugs

   We create. Everyday we create connection, chaos, possibility, drama, conversation, expectations, money, homes, relationships, works of art, friction, love, stories, or we don’t…

   Our power lies in our ability to direct our life story with every choice and every thought.

   Welcome to the 21 Challenges - 21 life hacks that have been set up to help you connect, take care of your beautiful self, create possibility, and get out of the dol drums. 

   This series of podcasts highlights the challenges one-by-one to give you background on why the challenge was included in the 21, a deeper understanding of the concept itself, and ideas on how to implement it. These simple challenges create big ah-ha’s and leave you with some great new tools to play with.

   Today we focus on Challenge # 16 - Give Free Hugs…stay tuned for some loving, touching, feeling. 

    

   Let’s start out with some wisdom from Oprah. Love that lady. She said, “When you make loving others the story of your life, there’s never a final chapter, because the legacy continues. You lend your light to one person and he or she shines it on another and another and another. And I know for sure that in the final analysis of our lives—when the to-do lists are no more, when the frenzy is finished, when our email inboxes are empty—the only. Thing that will have any lasting value is whether we’ve loved others and whether they loved us.”

   During the Covid upheaval touch became a thing carefully guarded. That makes this challenge even more pertinent now because we are all a little touch deprived…. even if you have to get creative.

   In a world where we can feel alone in a sea of a million people, the chance to hold another’s hand or to be hugged, can be a gift, an anchor, a place where for that moment you are not alone. For that moment you are joining forces. A hug is a human action that allows us to connect, communicate, and exchange energy in a meaningful way. For however long the moment lasts we are unafraid to touch, and that is a beautiful moment; and important moment. In fact, science shows it’s an absolutely crucial moment that must be repeated often.

   In Greater Good Magazine, out of Berkley, an article called, Why Physical Touch Matters for our Well Being said, “The science of touch came of age in the mid-1990s, when two scientists traveled to Romania to examine the sensory deprivation of children in understaffed orphanages. The touch-deprived children, they found, had strikingly lower cortisol and growth development levels for their age group. From the time we are in the womb through our elderly years, touch plays a primary role in our development and physical and mental well-being. New studies on touch continue to show the importance of physical contact in early development, communication, personal relationships, and fighting disease. Although the therapeutic benefits have become increasingly clear, scientists argues that, thanks to no-touch policies in schools and the isolating effects of cell phones and computers, (and now Covid) Americans are touching each other less.” 

   That makes this challenge even more important.

   In that article, they had some specific research on hugging: “They injected a cold germ into these people who were in the study, and those who had more hugs had a better immune response to the cold virus. (So, touch helps us fight disease.) And then [there are] some studies showing that if you get hugged by your partner before a stressful condition like giving a speech or doing math problems, people do better. Performance is better if they’ve been hugged by a partner before the stress.”

   In 2016, I found myself in Ohio doing this emotional intelligence training I speak of so often. Let me tell you about my experience setting up a Free Hugs stand.

   Tune in to hear that story...

   We come programmed to hold onto one another. We arrive hardwired to grasp hands and give hugs, and if we are lucky and wise, we don’t lose our grip.

   This challenge can be adapted for Covid by bringing it in to family members and friends you feel comfortable being close to, but the power of touch, with permission, even with people we may not be close to, like those who walked by our hug booth, was amazing, beautiful, insightful, and one of the largest ah-ha moments that unexpectedly showed up for me. It was so fun and interesting to see how people responded.

   Take this challenge and then go to the back of the book and record your experience. What was the hardest part? What was the response of others? What did you learn? How did it feel?

   If you don’t already have your book: Life - Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday, the 21 Life Connection Challenges, order your book off Amazon so you can get into all the life-hack challenges, or if you have a group you’d like to do it with, we have the new group platform

   Thanks for being here. See you in two weeks for the newest life-hack tip. Live intentional and fearless people. You’ve got this!

   ]]>1fc95daf-b0b8-4107-924a-06ad86d7fb7cWed, 11 Aug 2021 07:00:00 -070012:37falsefull199199Lori LeeShe Made a Difference for a LivingEpisode 198: She Made a Difference for a Living

   Someone at the memorial service on Monday referred to her as a homespun philanthropist, though I doubt she would have liked that description. Her wit was too sharp to fit the mellow image of homespun. As for philanthropist? She once said, “That’s such a pretentious word.”

   Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast. The clip I’ve just shared comes from a woman’t obituary that died probably 25 years ago. 

   So many years ago, I can’t remember the date, I ripped an article out of the Boston Globe newspaper called, “She made a difference for a living.” The article is yellowed and brittle, and if I had to guess I’d say it’s around 25 years old. Stay tuned in today’s episode for how Elizabeth Noyce became a one-woman economic development corporation in the 80’s and 90’s, without the Internet, and see what her story means to you.

    

   When Elizabeth Noyce died Ellen Goodman of the Boston Globe wrote an article that highlighted her life. I’ve been through many a business class where we are asked to write our own obituary and what we want to be known for/what our business wants to be known for, so we can plan now and reverse engineer what we do. I doubt that Elizabeth Noyce did this, but I’m sure any of us would be very pleased indeed to have a write-up like this done about us after we pass.

   Elizabeth Noyce was as unpretentious as her adopted state of Maine. She could walk down …

   Tune into the audio program to hear the rest of the article.

   One of the reasons we share stories is to show how things can be done. Stories are used to inspire, to initiate deeper thought, to shine a light on things. Today’s story of a woman’s life who lived decades earlier, shines a light on moral fiber, on the extraordinary, on a person who created good in the world on purpose, who forsook her own limelight living for the more understated. You may be thinking, “Sure, If I had millions of dollars I could do good too.” But I have to ask…would you, maybe you would? But now, right now we still have a responsibility to do good. We always have something to work with. We can always do good in our communities - This story is just a reminder to check in with yourself - are you caught in “he who has the most toys wins” mindset? Are you stuck in what’s in it for me? Is looking good and being in the limelight more important than doing good? As Elizabeth Noyce said, we can all just hope to make a little difference in our own communities. Are you creating peace, support for community and neighbors, hope and positive energy? Are you, if you are able, creating abundance for others in positive ways, or are you caught up in the fear, violence, the frantic stretch for control that permeates the neighborhoods and mindsets across the country? 

   Might I suggest that for a living, in our own individual ways, that we intentionally strive to make a positive difference. Choose light, choose love, choose growth, choose goodness. Choose sharing. 

   In order to create a greater more positive connection, I’ve created the 21 Life Connection Challenges - Group Style. Do you have a group you’re involved in that wants a fun way to connect and create good in their lives and in the world?

    

   Thanks for being here today. Live Big! Live Intentional. Live Well.

   ]]>Episode 198: She Made a Difference for a Living

   Someone at the memorial service on Monday referred to her as a homespun philanthropist, though I doubt she would have liked that description. Her wit was too sharp to fit the mellow image of homespun. As for philanthropist? She once said, “That’s such a pretentious word.”

   Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast. The clip I’ve just shared comes from a woman’t obituary that died probably 25 years ago. 

   So many years ago, I can’t remember the date, I ripped an article out of the Boston Globe newspaper called, “She made a difference for a living.” The article is yellowed and brittle, and if I had to guess I’d say it’s around 25 years old. Stay tuned in today’s episode for how Elizabeth Noyce became a one-woman economic development corporation in the 80’s and 90’s, without the Internet, and see what her story means to you.

    

   When Elizabeth Noyce died Ellen Goodman of the Boston Globe wrote an article that highlighted her life. I’ve been through many a business class where we are asked to write our own obituary and what we want to be known for/what our business wants to be known for, so we can plan now and reverse engineer what we do. I doubt that Elizabeth Noyce did this, but I’m sure any of us would be very pleased indeed to have a write-up like this done about us after we pass.

   Elizabeth Noyce was as unpretentious as her adopted state of Maine. She could walk down …

   Tune into the audio program to hear the rest of the article.

   One of the reasons we share stories is to show how things can be done. Stories are used to inspire, to initiate deeper thought, to shine a light on things. Today’s story of a woman’s life who lived decades earlier, shines a light on moral fiber, on the extraordinary, on a person who created good in the world on purpose, who forsook her own limelight living for the more understated. You may be thinking, “Sure, If I had millions of dollars I could do good too.” But I have to ask…would you, maybe you would? But now, right now we still have a responsibility to do good. We always have something to work with. We can always do good in our communities - This story is just a reminder to check in with yourself - are you caught in “he who has the most toys wins” mindset? Are you stuck in what’s in it for me? Is looking good and being in the limelight more important than doing good? As Elizabeth Noyce said, we can all just hope to make a little difference in our own communities. Are you creating peace, support for community and neighbors, hope and positive energy? Are you, if you are able, creating abundance for others in positive ways, or are you caught up in the fear, violence, the frantic stretch for control that permeates the neighborhoods and mindsets across the country? 

   Might I suggest that for a living, in our own individual ways, that we intentionally strive to make a positive difference. Choose light, choose love, choose growth, choose goodness. Choose sharing. 

   In order to create a greater more positive connection, I’ve created the 21 Life Connection Challenges - Group Style. Do you have a group you’re involved in that wants a fun way to connect and create good in their lives and in the world?

    

   Thanks for being here today. Live Big! Live Intentional. Live Well.

   ]]>7c7dd7dc-359a-4bfc-af1e-2839041e67b0Wed, 28 Jul 2021 07:00:00 -070012:27falsefull198198Lori LeeChallenge #14 - 22 Minutes of Focus - Time blocking and momentumEpisode 197: Challenge #14 - 22 Minutes of Focus: Time Blocking and Momentum We create. Everyday we create connection, chaos, possibility, drama, conversation, expectations, money, homes, relationships, works of art, friction, love, stories, or we don’t… Our power lies in our ability to direct our life story with every choice  and every thought. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast and the 21 Life Connection Challenges - 21 life hacks that have been set up to help you connect, take care of  your fabulous self, create possibility in your life, and get out of the dol drums.  This series of podcasts highlights the challenges one-by-one, gives you background on why the challenge was included in the 21 chosen challenges, a deeper understanding of the concept itself, and ideas on how to implement it. These simple challenges create big ah-ha’s and leave you with some great new tools to play with. Today we focus on Challenge #14 - this one is about getting off that couch, getting that stone rolling down the mountain, the push that starts the momentum. You’ll love this life-hack.   Challenge 14 is to choose one of the projects in your life that you have been putting off and devote 22 minutes of time to focus on that project. Set a timer and rock n roll. I have two words for you -  Time blocking Momentum Back in 2016 I was fresh into the idea of learning how to podcast. When I was setting up the Love Your Story podcast I had to learn how to use the equipment, organize content, find my way through the mountain of to-dos… I would get stuck. Stuck because of the overwhelm. This past year 2020, when I was creating the 21-Life Connection Challenges and creating the group platform we just launched so more people could connect and learn from the challenges, I hit the same wall. There is so much to do, to plan, to organize. I’d wake up some mornings filled with anxiety and not sure where to start, then I’d end up pushing things I didn’t want to do, mostly because I wasn’t sure how to do them, or there was a fear of failure attached, so I’d push them to the bottom of the list. When I can see this happening, I know for me that the only way out of it is to time block. Instead of feeling like if I jump in I’m going to get lost and never get out. Or fearing that I’m going to be in the pain of uncharted territory indefinitely, I break my time into chunks.  I will work on X for 30 minutes. I will then work on Y for 1 hour. I will then work on Z for 45 minutes. This helps me to wade in, get going, and for some reason that “out” on the other side of my timer gives me solace. Today’s challenge is to choose something you’ve been putting off - something on that pile of things to do - is it a work deal, a garage that needs cleaning, a bill that needs dealing with, a conversation that needs to happen, an idea that needs your complete attention to work through it? ….Give it a moment and that thing will come to you.  Now, get things set up, and set your timer for 22 minutes and jump all in. Let me share some examples from one of our recent challenge groups: Bernadette said, “I totally blew this one. I decided to spend some time on family history. I set the timer, started my task, and the timer went off in due course. Three and a half hours later... I was still making great progress.😂” This is a great example of momentum. Sometimes when the ball gets rolling that 22 minutes doesn’t matter any more. Mel said, “I am a self proclaimed organized person. My house is tidy. Everything in the house has a place or what I call a home, or it doesn’t get to stay long. However,...]]>Episode 197: Challenge #14 - 22 Minutes of Focus: Time Blocking and Momentum We create. Everyday we create connection, chaos, possibility, drama, conversation, expectations, money, homes, relationships, works of art, friction, love, stories, or we don’t… Our power lies in our ability to direct our life story with every choice  and every thought. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast and the 21 Life Connection Challenges - 21 life hacks that have been set up to help you connect, take care of  your fabulous self, create possibility in your life, and get out of the dol drums.  This series of podcasts highlights the challenges one-by-one, gives you background on why the challenge was included in the 21 chosen challenges, a deeper understanding of the concept itself, and ideas on how to implement it. These simple challenges create big ah-ha’s and leave you with some great new tools to play with. Today we focus on Challenge #14 - this one is about getting off that couch, getting that stone rolling down the mountain, the push that starts the momentum. You’ll love this life-hack.   Challenge 14 is to choose one of the projects in your life that you have been putting off and devote 22 minutes of time to focus on that project. Set a timer and rock n roll. I have two words for you -  Time blocking Momentum Back in 2016 I was fresh into the idea of learning how to podcast. When I was setting up the Love Your Story podcast I had to learn how to use the equipment, organize content, find my way through the mountain of to-dos… I would get stuck. Stuck because of the overwhelm. This past year 2020, when I was creating the 21-Life Connection Challenges and creating the group platform we just launched so more people could connect and learn from the challenges, I hit the same wall. There is so much to do, to plan, to organize. I’d wake up some mornings filled with anxiety and not sure where to start, then I’d end up pushing things I didn’t want to do, mostly because I wasn’t sure how to do them, or there was a fear of failure attached, so I’d push them to the bottom of the list. When I can see this happening, I know for me that the only way out of it is to time block. Instead of feeling like if I jump in I’m going to get lost and never get out. Or fearing that I’m going to be in the pain of uncharted territory indefinitely, I break my time into chunks.  I will work on X for 30 minutes. I will then work on Y for 1 hour. I will then work on Z for 45 minutes. This helps me to wade in, get going, and for some reason that “out” on the other side of my timer gives me solace. Today’s challenge is to choose something you’ve been putting off - something on that pile of things to do - is it a work deal, a garage that needs cleaning, a bill that needs dealing with, a conversation that needs to happen, an idea that needs your complete attention to work through it? ….Give it a moment and that thing will come to you.  Now, get things set up, and set your timer for 22 minutes and jump all in. Let me share some examples from one of our recent challenge groups: Bernadette said, “I totally blew this one. I decided to spend some time on family history. I set the timer, started my task, and the timer went off in due course. Three and a half hours later... I was still making great progress.😂” This is a great example of momentum. Sometimes when the ball gets rolling that 22 minutes doesn’t matter any more. Mel said, “I am a self proclaimed organized person. My house is tidy. Everything in the house has a place or what I call a home, or it doesn’t get to stay long. However, over the past 11 years I’ve held onto baby items from both children and now it’s time to start purging the baby item totes. I used my 22 minutes to reorganize and pass along three totes worth of items. Some will go to a girlfriend expecting a baby girl in February and the other stack will go to a Guatemalan Humanitarian project. It feels good to know that everything I pulled from the totes will for sure be used by other little babies. Loved this timed challenge- helped me start a big project by allowing me a bite sized, pre-determine amount of energy I had to devote. Will be adopting this one again soon.  Lori said, “I had emptied a box yesterday, mostly paper, had it sorted on my craft table. Last night I washed my mailbox dividers to be ready for this challenge. I put the timer on after taking a before and after pics. I put together the mail slot and put the paper in according to topic. Got about 1/3 of the way through it and went a few minutes over. Not done yet, but progress.” Haylee said, "I just completed this one. It was great to feel that intentional drive and to stay on my task because time was a ticking.😀My kitchen corner has been an eyesore that was bugging me and really annoying my organized husband. It took me 35 minutes, but I got it done!  (You should have seen the before and after pictures.) As YOU do this challenge you’re going to discover a couple things: 

   1. It’s so much easier when you know you have an out. 
   2. Sometimes once we get started and get that momentum going we don’t need the out and we can just keep rolling. 
   3. When it’s done and you’ve either exited at 22 minutes or finished the “thing,” you will feel accomplished, proud at having made progress, and it might even be a fun new life hack you decide to use over and over. 

   
   This challenge, like all the challenges, is more than it appears on the surface. Momentum is a powerful force and learning tricks of the trade to help you ease into the things your resisting can make all the difference. Work smart people! I’ll bet that this life-hack will become a favorite also. It’s one of mine. Your challenge for the week is to take this challenge. Order your book off Amazon so you can get into all the life-hack challenges and start recording your experiences in the book, or if you have a group you’d like to do it with, we have the new group platform.   Thanks for being here. See you in two weeks for the newest life-hack tip. Live intentional and fearless people. You’ve got this!]]>5049cdcc-b729-47b7-82d7-e63fc1384ee0Wed, 14 Jul 2021 07:00:00 -070009:25falsefull197197Lori LeeA Story of Rape and Healing - Interview Janiel GreenEpisode 196: A Story of Rape and Healing - Interview Janiel Green What you see when you look at Janiel Green, the creator of Culture Trekking, is hundreds of beautiful photos of her travels all over the world. She is snorkeling in beautiful blue waters, and standing on top of mountains. She’s laughing at the camera with her beautiful smile,  but the story always goes deeper. Culture Trekking was created by this vivacious young woman as a way to survive a brutal rape. When it came time to choose between accepting her fear as the new status quo of her life or making a strategic choice to choose love and connection with people around the world through travel, she chose the later.   Janiel is a physician’s Assistant, a survivor, and the creator of the YouTube Channel and website called Culture Trekking, dedicated to  inspiring people to explore through cultural connections and sustainable adventures. She’s a dog lover - she has two - Finn and Zoey, and of course, she travels in her free time. Tune into the audio program for my interview with Janiel and hear her story of rape and healing. Beware of candid discussion regarding sexual trauma. To connect with Janiel: Culturetrekking.com Youtube.com/c/cutlruetrekking Facebook.com/CultureTrekking Instagram.com/CultureTrekking Twitter.com/CultureTrekking One of the things Janiel wrote is, “When you let go of the illusion of control, things will happen to you like a tsunami wave, there is still goodness in the world you just have to be open to receiving it. Thanks for being here for this week’s show. We’ll see you in two weeks for the next episode of the Love Your Story podcast. If you liked this episode, please leave us a quick review on your app. It’s good Karma to support.]]>Episode 196: A Story of Rape and Healing - Interview Janiel Green What you see when you look at Janiel Green, the creator of Culture Trekking, is hundreds of beautiful photos of her travels all over the world. She is snorkeling in beautiful blue waters, and standing on top of mountains. She’s laughing at the camera with her beautiful smile,  but the story always goes deeper. Culture Trekking was created by this vivacious young woman as a way to survive a brutal rape. When it came time to choose between accepting her fear as the new status quo of her life or making a strategic choice to choose love and connection with people around the world through travel, she chose the later.   Janiel is a physician’s Assistant, a survivor, and the creator of the YouTube Channel and website called Culture Trekking, dedicated to  inspiring people to explore through cultural connections and sustainable adventures. She’s a dog lover - she has two - Finn and Zoey, and of course, she travels in her free time. Tune into the audio program for my interview with Janiel and hear her story of rape and healing. Beware of candid discussion regarding sexual trauma. To connect with Janiel: Culturetrekking.com Youtube.com/c/cutlruetrekking Facebook.com/CultureTrekking Instagram.com/CultureTrekking Twitter.com/CultureTrekking One of the things Janiel wrote is, “When you let go of the illusion of control, things will happen to you like a tsunami wave, there is still goodness in the world you just have to be open to receiving it. Thanks for being here for this week’s show. We’ll see you in two weeks for the next episode of the Love Your Story podcast. If you liked this episode, please leave us a quick review on your app. It’s good Karma to support.]]>b26baf9b-ec7d-4975-8e91-084d71d67e82Wed, 30 Jun 2021 07:00:00 -070036:50falsefull196196Lori LeeChallenge #12 - Forward Someone Else's AgendaEpisode 195: Challenge #12 Challenge #12 -  Give someone in your SOI hardy encouragement for something they are doing. Do what you can to forward their agenda.  We create. Everyday we create connection, chaos, possibility, drama, conversation, expectations, money, homes, relationships, works of art, friction, love, stories, or we don’t… Our power lies in our ability to direct our life story with every choice  and every thought. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast and the 21 Life Connection Challenges - 21 life hacks that have been set up to help you connect, take care of  your fabulous self, create possibility in your one and only life, and get out of the dol drums and anxiety that’s looming.  This series of podcasts highlights the challenges one-by-one, gives you background on why the challenge was included in the 21 chosen challenges, a deeper understanding of the concept itself, and ideas on how to implement it. These simple challenges create big ah-ha’s and leave you with some great new tools to play with. Today we focus on Challenge #12 - which is: Give someone in your sphere of influence hardy encouragement for something they are doing. Do what you can to forward their agenda.  Tune in for how giving really is the key to receiving.  A few years back a read a book called Love is the Killer App. It espoused the novel idea that the very most successful way to do business was to actually help other people. When you interview a client, spoke with an associate, met someone new, the first thing you do is consider what you know, who you know, what books you’ve read, …you search your arsenal of value and see what you can give to the other person to support them where they are at. GIVE. Do you know someone you could introduce them to that would further their agenda? Have you read a book that would support what they are currently working on? Have you found a digital tool that would support their forward movement? In a world where people are always pushing their own agenda, this was novel, fresh, pioneering. Tune in to hear the excerpt from that book.... Let me share some personal experiences.

   1. I have been in many networking groups, training groups, and entrepreneurial support style groups. When I need something as simple as a review for the podcast, let’s say, and I put that out to the group, I’m always surprised at how difficult it is for people to even give a few easy minutes to support someone else’s agenda. They all show up hoping someone will give them the next best client, but they aren’t willing to support one another. It’s been interesting for me to watch. Even people who commit to leaving a podcast review, in this example, often won't follow through, in my experience. It makes it easy to make a splash in a room like this when you go in willing to support them.
   2. The end of 2019 I invited a group of influencers together to share what they were about with the express intent that each person who attended would see what they could do to move the others’ agendas forward. It wasn’t about pushing your own agenda, it was about seeing what you could do to help others, but at the same time, the very nature of this sharing made it so your own agenda would be focused on by others also. It’s amazing how much getting connected to the right person or business can help. How an idea you hadn’t thought of can change things for you because someone else did a little brainstorming with you. We really don’t do this alone. But when you come at it from how can I help instead of how can you help me, you actually get both with a lot more success.
   3. During Christmas I throw a...]]>Episode 195: Challenge #12 Challenge #12 -  Give someone in your SOI hardy encouragement for something they are doing. Do what you can to forward their agenda.  We create. Everyday we create connection, chaos, possibility, drama, conversation, expectations, money, homes, relationships, works of art, friction, love, stories, or we don’t… Our power lies in our ability to direct our life story with every choice  and every thought. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast and the 21 Life Connection Challenges - 21 life hacks that have been set up to help you connect, take care of  your fabulous self, create possibility in your one and only life, and get out of the dol drums and anxiety that’s looming.  This series of podcasts highlights the challenges one-by-one, gives you background on why the challenge was included in the 21 chosen challenges, a deeper understanding of the concept itself, and ideas on how to implement it. These simple challenges create big ah-ha’s and leave you with some great new tools to play with. Today we focus on Challenge #12 - which is: Give someone in your sphere of influence hardy encouragement for something they are doing. Do what you can to forward their agenda.  Tune in for how giving really is the key to receiving.  A few years back a read a book called Love is the Killer App. It espoused the novel idea that the very most successful way to do business was to actually help other people. When you interview a client, spoke with an associate, met someone new, the first thing you do is consider what you know, who you know, what books you’ve read, …you search your arsenal of value and see what you can give to the other person to support them where they are at. GIVE. Do you know someone you could introduce them to that would further their agenda? Have you read a book that would support what they are currently working on? Have you found a digital tool that would support their forward movement? In a world where people are always pushing their own agenda, this was novel, fresh, pioneering. Tune in to hear the excerpt from that book.... Let me share some personal experiences.
      1. I have been in many networking groups, training groups, and entrepreneurial support style groups. When I need something as simple as a review for the podcast, let’s say, and I put that out to the group, I’m always surprised at how difficult it is for people to even give a few easy minutes to support someone else’s agenda. They all show up hoping someone will give them the next best client, but they aren’t willing to support one another. It’s been interesting for me to watch. Even people who commit to leaving a podcast review, in this example, often won't follow through, in my experience. It makes it easy to make a splash in a room like this when you go in willing to support them.
      2. The end of 2019 I invited a group of influencers together to share what they were about with the express intent that each person who attended would see what they could do to move the others’ agendas forward. It wasn’t about pushing your own agenda, it was about seeing what you could do to help others, but at the same time, the very nature of this sharing made it so your own agenda would be focused on by others also. It’s amazing how much getting connected to the right person or business can help. How an idea you hadn’t thought of can change things for you because someone else did a little brainstorming with you. We really don’t do this alone. But when you come at it from how can I help instead of how can you help me, you actually get both with a lot more success.
      3. During Christmas I throw a retreat for my sister and sister in-laws. This past year we were doing a round table and sharing what we were about for 2021. I was talking about the new 21 Challenges Group platform that was launching and my dear sister in-law says, if you need help selling your book, I can do that. Those beautiful words are just the sort of thing you don’t hear very often. This is the type of thing I’m talking about.
      
      This is why this challenge is so powerful. Because by these small acts of sharing who we are, what we know, things we’ve learned, we can help someone else out immeasurably. It’s an act of kindness, but even more so, it’s an act of networking w great Karma. Just as was illustrated in the influencers example I just shared, when you give to others they give to you. You build relationships on caring and sharing instead of competition and self-promotion. The people in your life, in your sphere of influence, who have agendas they are pouring their heart and soul into, will be so grateful for someone else to care about what they are doing. It’s such an easy way to shine, to connect, to network, to share, to build valuable relationships in the very best way. Martha Beck, International Life Coach, said, “Relationships are the most important human experience available to us. I realized in my twenties that the meaning of life is not about what happens to people; it’s about what happens between people. Learning to connect with each other, to experience empathy, to step outside our own experience, and to experience love in all its forms—these, I believe, are the experiences for which we became human.” While this challenge is definitely about stepping above the crowd, creating relationship on a higher level of doing, it’s a very Karmic way to approach your personal networking (friends, family, work).  When people realize that you work as a love cat, that you’re passionate, kind, a doer, a helper, you know people and things,  they become increasingly aware of who you are and they soon start caring about what you do, how they can help you by nurturing the relationship, and the good comes rolling back around.  Be a Love Cat! Today find someone in your sphere of influence and do something to support them, just for the sake of testing this out. You might even like it so much, you’ll start working this way, and how much better would the world be then?   See you in two weeks for our next episode of the Love Your Story podcast and how you can create your best life on purpose.]]>ebf365f5-b183-4a11-8eba-029cf4628c9bWed, 16 Jun 2021 07:00:00 -070013:30falsefull195195Lori LeeDo the Work to Heal - Interview Andrea CarverEpisode 194: Do the Work to Heal

      Interview Andrea Carver

      Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast…if you are a regular listener to this podcast you know how the stories you tell yourself create your reality. That’s what the whole Love Your Story movement is about —helping you to realize and take control of your life stories. 

      Wayne Dyer said, “Be open to everything and attached to nothing.” This is key as we do work with our own stories.

      Today I have a treat for you. Andrea Carver is here on the show. She is a Craniosacral Therapist who has been practicing for 30 years. The heart of her work as a therapist is a spiritual understanding of the unlimited potential for growth of the human spirt and as she has done her work over the past 3 decades, she hears stories every day that are similar to each other….limiting stories that need to be reframed. Stay tuned for our interview and to learn a few skills for taking old stories and shifting them into empowering ones. Let’s be open to everything and attached to nothing, and we’ll see where we land…

      Tune into the audio program to hear answers to questions like:

      1. You said that the same script you hear from people is that they have had negative experiences that happened to them in their past, those experiences helped them create a story that they tell themselves (their perceived reality) and then the spend their life looking for proof to validate these stories. Tell us some of those stories.
      2. How do you take an old story -something ugly and damaging - and make it an incredible learning experience filled with wisdom and enlightenment?
      3. During the past year we have all been staying home more, connecting less, touching less and dealing with the resulting anxiety, depression and stress that comes when humans can’t be the social beings they are - and of course the stress of the unknown that surrounds the pandemic. Well, now we have to deal with the mental and emotional aftermath. What do you suggest for us all to deal with this Covid backlash?
      4. You have trained under some really impressive people - Deepak Chopra and Byron Katie…what was that like? What did you learn?
      
      

      To contact Andrea:

      1andreawellness@gmail.com

      https://www.andreawellness.com

       

      Deepak Chopra said, “Quit trying to fight the darkness and look for more light.” As we conclude I think this a fitting stair to step out on…as we consider our stories and how they are holding us back, let us all be less resistant to changing them. Let us look for the light and the learning that comes from the shift, rather than struggling in the dark. Your challenge this week is to identify one story in your life that you know is holding you back. Shifting our stories is often something we cannot do alone. We need guidance and help because we are so stuck in our own way of seeing the world. We think how we see things is fact. Well, if you need help meeting this challenge You can go to loveyourstorypodcast.com and find Andrea’s contact information in the show notes, but I also suggest that you listen to the 5 Steps to Reframing your story - that is episode 46-50, each episode deals with one of the 5 steps for reframing your story. Excellent for walking you through all the steps as you do the work.

      Thanks for being here today. We are so happy to be able to provide you with tools. We hope you will use them in the way that best serves you. We’ll see you in two weeks. If you enjoyed the show, please leave a review on whatever platform you listen on! Caio

      ]]>Episode 194: Do the Work to Heal

      Interview Andrea Carver

      Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast…if you are a regular listener to this podcast you know how the stories you tell yourself create your reality. That’s what the whole Love Your Story movement is about —helping you to realize and take control of your life stories. 

      Wayne Dyer said, “Be open to everything and attached to nothing.” This is key as we do work with our own stories.

      Today I have a treat for you. Andrea Carver is here on the show. She is a Craniosacral Therapist who has been practicing for 30 years. The heart of her work as a therapist is a spiritual understanding of the unlimited potential for growth of the human spirt and as she has done her work over the past 3 decades, she hears stories every day that are similar to each other….limiting stories that need to be reframed. Stay tuned for our interview and to learn a few skills for taking old stories and shifting them into empowering ones. Let’s be open to everything and attached to nothing, and we’ll see where we land…

      Tune into the audio program to hear answers to questions like:

      1. You said that the same script you hear from people is that they have had negative experiences that happened to them in their past, those experiences helped them create a story that they tell themselves (their perceived reality) and then the spend their life looking for proof to validate these stories. Tell us some of those stories.
      2. How do you take an old story -something ugly and damaging - and make it an incredible learning experience filled with wisdom and enlightenment?
      3. During the past year we have all been staying home more, connecting less, touching less and dealing with the resulting anxiety, depression and stress that comes when humans can’t be the social beings they are - and of course the stress of the unknown that surrounds the pandemic. Well, now we have to deal with the mental and emotional aftermath. What do you suggest for us all to deal with this Covid backlash?
      4. You have trained under some really impressive people - Deepak Chopra and Byron Katie…what was that like? What did you learn?
      
      

      To contact Andrea:

      1andreawellness@gmail.com

      https://www.andreawellness.com

       

      Deepak Chopra said, “Quit trying to fight the darkness and look for more light.” As we conclude I think this a fitting stair to step out on…as we consider our stories and how they are holding us back, let us all be less resistant to changing them. Let us look for the light and the learning that comes from the shift, rather than struggling in the dark. Your challenge this week is to identify one story in your life that you know is holding you back. Shifting our stories is often something we cannot do alone. We need guidance and help because we are so stuck in our own way of seeing the world. We think how we see things is fact. Well, if you need help meeting this challenge You can go to loveyourstorypodcast.com and find Andrea’s contact information in the show notes, but I also suggest that you listen to the 5 Steps to Reframing your story - that is episode 46-50, each episode deals with one of the 5 steps for reframing your story. Excellent for walking you through all the steps as you do the work.

      Thanks for being here today. We are so happy to be able to provide you with tools. We hope you will use them in the way that best serves you. We’ll see you in two weeks. If you enjoyed the show, please leave a review on whatever platform you listen on! Caio

      ]]>f16d8c32-047c-4d54-b926-44595fb1f1c7Wed, 02 Jun 2021 07:00:00 -070027:20falsefull194194Lori LeeEpisode 193: Think Unbroken – Interview with Michael AnthonyEpisode 193: Think Unbroken - Interview with Michael Anthony Michael Anthony was born to a hyper-abusive drug addict mother who cut his finger off when he was 4-years-old, a step father you pray you never have, and a  racist grandmother who pushed him into an identity crisis. By the time he was 9 his family was often homeless, certainly living in poverty, and he was eventually adopted by his grandmother. He turned to drugs and alcohol to survive the continued abuse. There is a lot more to Michael’s story… he is now the author of the best-selling book Think Unbroken.… despite learning disabilities and not graduation high school on time, Michael found success in corporate America in his early twenties. But, he says, success only made things worse. He found himself morbidly obese, high and drunk daily and ultimately self-sabataging everything around him. It wasn’t until he decided to do whatever it took to heal from his childhood trauma that his life really began. TUNE INTO THE AUDIO PROGRAM TO HEAR MY INTERVIEW WITH MICHAEL and such topics as: 1. I want to start out with your story - because that’s what we do here - we tell stories. Take us back to your childhood. What are some of your main memories? 2. You said you had a mirror moment where you chose to do what it took to heal. Tell us about that moment. 3. How do you think healing begins? 4. How do we think unBroken? 5. What is the one thing we can do right now to create a mindset shift? 6. You work as a coach, mentor and educator for adult survivors of child abuse. You say you  help survivors get out of the vortex. What does that mean? 7. Tell us about the Unbroken podcast and Think Unbroken Academy. Final tips for rebuilding yourself after abuse. Childhood abuse and trauma is a topic we have hit on in only a few episodes. I remember the one where his father tried to kill him because he thought he was a prophet, like Abraham, who had to kill his son…but I’m grateful for Michael’s story, and his work. Think Unbroken was created out of necessity - as so many things are. But the beauty of those creations is that it provides resources for people who need them. What was he willing to do to become the hero of his story? What are you willing to do to be the hero/heroine you want to be in your story? The journey to healing is long and difficult for even the toughest of warriors. Childhood trauma and abuse take so much energy to overcome, and one of the best tools in your arsenal is a support system that you can leverage when the going gets tough. Contact information for Michael and Think Unbroken, is in the show notes on www.loveyourstorypodcast.com If you are in a space where healing is needed, that’s not a place of shame, that’s a place of growth. Create the life story that you want, on purpose. You can do it. Thanks for being here today. If you like the show, please leave us a review and share us with your friends. We’ll see you in two weeks for the next episode.]]>Episode 193: Think Unbroken - Interview with Michael Anthony Michael Anthony was born to a hyper-abusive drug addict mother who cut his finger off when he was 4-years-old, a step father you pray you never have, and a  racist grandmother who pushed him into an identity crisis. By the time he was 9 his family was often homeless, certainly living in poverty, and he was eventually adopted by his grandmother. He turned to drugs and alcohol to survive the continued abuse. There is a lot more to Michael’s story… he is now the author of the best-selling book Think Unbroken.… despite learning disabilities and not graduation high school on time, Michael found success in corporate America in his early twenties. But, he says, success only made things worse. He found himself morbidly obese, high and drunk daily and ultimately self-sabataging everything around him. It wasn’t until he decided to do whatever it took to heal from his childhood trauma that his life really began. TUNE INTO THE AUDIO PROGRAM TO HEAR MY INTERVIEW WITH MICHAEL and such topics as: 1. I want to start out with your story - because that’s what we do here - we tell stories. Take us back to your childhood. What are some of your main memories? 2. You said you had a mirror moment where you chose to do what it took to heal. Tell us about that moment. 3. How do you think healing begins? 4. How do we think unBroken? 5. What is the one thing we can do right now to create a mindset shift? 6. You work as a coach, mentor and educator for adult survivors of child abuse. You say you  help survivors get out of the vortex. What does that mean? 7. Tell us about the Unbroken podcast and Think Unbroken Academy. Final tips for rebuilding yourself after abuse. Childhood abuse and trauma is a topic we have hit on in only a few episodes. I remember the one where his father tried to kill him because he thought he was a prophet, like Abraham, who had to kill his son…but I’m grateful for Michael’s story, and his work. Think Unbroken was created out of necessity - as so many things are. But the beauty of those creations is that it provides resources for people who need them. What was he willing to do to become the hero of his story? What are you willing to do to be the hero/heroine you want to be in your story? The journey to healing is long and difficult for even the toughest of warriors. Childhood trauma and abuse take so much energy to overcome, and one of the best tools in your arsenal is a support system that you can leverage when the going gets tough. Contact information for Michael and Think Unbroken, is in the show notes on www.loveyourstorypodcast.com If you are in a space where healing is needed, that’s not a place of shame, that’s a place of growth. Create the life story that you want, on purpose. You can do it. Thanks for being here today. If you like the show, please leave us a review and share us with your friends. We’ll see you in two weeks for the next episode.]]>8626d010-f92f-496f-8b54-ff8cb9b09356Wed, 19 May 2021 07:00:00 -070040:01falsefull193193Lori LeeEpisode 192: Challenge 11: Say YES to something you would usually say no to.Episode 192: Challenge 11: Say YES to something you would usually say no to. We create. Everyday we create connection, chaos, possibility, drama, conversation, expectations, money, homes, relationships, works of art, friction, love, stories, or we don’t… Our power lies in our ability to direct our life story with every choice  and every thought. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast and the 21 Life Connection Challenges - 21 life hacks that have been set up to help you connect, take care of  your fabulous self, create possibility in your one-and-only life, and get out of the dol drums or anxiety that follows too close on your heels.  This series of podcasts highlights the challenges one-by-one, gives you background on why the challenge was included in the 21 chosen challenges, a deeper understanding of the concept itself, and ideas on how to implement it. These simple challenges create big ah-ha’s and leave you with some great new tools to play with. Today we focus on Challenge #11 - To say YES to something you would usually say NO to. Stay tuned for stretching into YES! This IS a good one.   Let me just start off by stating the obvious. If you keep doing what you’re doing, you’ll keep getting what you’re getting. Keep saying no to the things you habitually say no to, and nothing new is going to move into your life. In 2016 my friend and colleague Sally walked into my office. “You’ve GOT to go to this emotional intelligence training I just finished,” she proclaimed. I laughed at her, because in fact she’d just indicated I needed emotional intelligence training. I retorted “I HAVE to, do I?”  “Yes,” she said unapologetically, “You really have to work through your issues with men.” Blunt as she was I was also aware of this fact and so I asked her to tell me more. As she spoke I decided I would look into it. I would say “Yes.” It involved buying airline tickets to fly across the country, the fees to sign up for the conference, paying for a motel/air bnb  and Uber…and I was a single mom trying to support my family, but I said yes because in my gut I knew I was stuck, and while I would usually say no to the extra expenditure, I decided to say YES. This saying Yes changed everything for me. After a year of training, repeated trips across the country, a transition into coaching, I found my way through the walls that I’d been stuck behind. I found my next step forward, a path that brings me to you today on the airwaves of podcast love. Saying ‘Yes’ changed everything for me. When Gandolf invited Bilbo on an adventure, how did saying YES change his life, his understanding, his experience…. Can you even imagine the adventure lost, the change of the story if the protagonist says ‘no’ and sits in the shire? The story dissolves, and certainly his part in saving middle earth is no longer.  If you love a mystery, remember, you never know where saying YES is going to take you. Me seldom realize the moments that will change our lives. You don’t know when that YES will start of chain of events that saves the world. You don’t know….that’s the adventure of it all. Why do this challenge: Remember the movie “Yes Man?” In it Jim Carrey takes an oath to say yes to everything that comes up, to everything anyone asks him to do. The movie is the tale of how his life drastically changes and all the adventures that happen because he is willing to say yes to new things - giving a homeless man money, taking flying lessons, going on a date, throwing a bridal shower…by saying yes to all these things he creates a life that is 180 degrees different from the one he lived before and it opened up finding love,...]]>Episode 192: Challenge 11: Say YES to something you would usually say no to. We create. Everyday we create connection, chaos, possibility, drama, conversation, expectations, money, homes, relationships, works of art, friction, love, stories, or we don’t… Our power lies in our ability to direct our life story with every choice  and every thought. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast and the 21 Life Connection Challenges - 21 life hacks that have been set up to help you connect, take care of  your fabulous self, create possibility in your one-and-only life, and get out of the dol drums or anxiety that follows too close on your heels.  This series of podcasts highlights the challenges one-by-one, gives you background on why the challenge was included in the 21 chosen challenges, a deeper understanding of the concept itself, and ideas on how to implement it. These simple challenges create big ah-ha’s and leave you with some great new tools to play with. Today we focus on Challenge #11 - To say YES to something you would usually say NO to. Stay tuned for stretching into YES! This IS a good one.   Let me just start off by stating the obvious. If you keep doing what you’re doing, you’ll keep getting what you’re getting. Keep saying no to the things you habitually say no to, and nothing new is going to move into your life. In 2016 my friend and colleague Sally walked into my office. “You’ve GOT to go to this emotional intelligence training I just finished,” she proclaimed. I laughed at her, because in fact she’d just indicated I needed emotional intelligence training. I retorted “I HAVE to, do I?”  “Yes,” she said unapologetically, “You really have to work through your issues with men.” Blunt as she was I was also aware of this fact and so I asked her to tell me more. As she spoke I decided I would look into it. I would say “Yes.” It involved buying airline tickets to fly across the country, the fees to sign up for the conference, paying for a motel/air bnb  and Uber…and I was a single mom trying to support my family, but I said yes because in my gut I knew I was stuck, and while I would usually say no to the extra expenditure, I decided to say YES. This saying Yes changed everything for me. After a year of training, repeated trips across the country, a transition into coaching, I found my way through the walls that I’d been stuck behind. I found my next step forward, a path that brings me to you today on the airwaves of podcast love. Saying ‘Yes’ changed everything for me. When Gandolf invited Bilbo on an adventure, how did saying YES change his life, his understanding, his experience…. Can you even imagine the adventure lost, the change of the story if the protagonist says ‘no’ and sits in the shire? The story dissolves, and certainly his part in saving middle earth is no longer.  If you love a mystery, remember, you never know where saying YES is going to take you. Me seldom realize the moments that will change our lives. You don’t know when that YES will start of chain of events that saves the world. You don’t know….that’s the adventure of it all. Why do this challenge: Remember the movie “Yes Man?” In it Jim Carrey takes an oath to say yes to everything that comes up, to everything anyone asks him to do. The movie is the tale of how his life drastically changes and all the adventures that happen because he is willing to say yes to new things - giving a homeless man money, taking flying lessons, going on a date, throwing a bridal shower…by saying yes to all these things he creates a life that is 180 degrees different from the one he lived before and it opened up finding love, connecting with people, seeing and doing things he’d never done.   That’s the idea here, but rather than saying yes to everything, all you have to do is choose one thing today to say yes to - but it has to be something you would usually have said no to. Then, you can keep saying yes if you want, but let’s start with one thing. This challenge is about creating possibility in your life. In one group who was participating in the challenges a woman shared that she approached the whole day with the question - “Can I say Yes to that?” On that day her children got a special treat because things she had habitually been saying no to, she realized she didn’t need to say no to. Fun and insight into her own habits was her take-away. You can imagine how her kids loved it. I had a gentleman who was taking the challenge tell me, I always say yes to everything and everyone, so I adapted the challenge to be brave and say no when someone asked me to do something I didn’t want to do. Style points. You know if this approach is the one you should take. One woman said yes to getting highlights in her hair. One said yes to buying a life coaching program she had been putting off. Another agreed to play games with her parents despite the fact she was not a game player. She bonded with her parents for a couple hours and found the connection was worth the effort. Does your significant other want to try something he/she thinks would be fun, but you’ve said no? Today is the day to try something new. YES! Did you know that novelty is one of the things humans need most. We will go looking for it when things get too predictable. Novelty feeds our souls. New things creates possibility for us. Lest you. Stumble past what that means…possibility means something new, something magic, something wonderful has the chance to thrill you. But that magic requires you get out of your comfort zone. In the Ted Talk 2020 by Tracy Edwards, the first woman to win the Yachtsman of the Year trophy, she shares how saying Yes created her best possible life. Listen to the audio to hear this clip. She said Yes to backpacking in Greece. Yes to working on boats. Yes to learning to navigate. And, one yes at a time she stopped being a bystander in her own life. Now, know that this challenge isn’t to add more to your plate of things to do, nor is it to complicate your life, we all know the importance of boundaries, but it is about saying yes to something that you would usually dismiss so you can stretch into a new experience, a greater possibility of freshness, fun and novelty. Push past the resistance and do that uncomfortable thing.  I’ll leave you to your “Yes” day with this final quote by Martha Beck, International Life Coach, “Even if it’s nothing but an alluring tickle, push the objections aside and move into the feeling of “Yes!” Believe it or not, this sensation — not pain, not self-sacrifice, not stoic numbness — is the surest indicator that you’re on the path that will lead you to the best possible effect you can have on the world.” Live big, live intentional and you know what your challenge is this week. Say “Yes” to something you would usually say no to. See you in two weeks for the next LYS Podcast.]]>5e1ee8fc-3d2e-4f3c-90f6-0e7adbadc4d2Wed, 05 May 2021 07:00:00 -070014:34falsefull192192Lori LeeEpisode 191: A Tool for Testing Conspiracy Theories – Interview Jeannie Banks ThomasEpisode 191: A Tool for Testing Conspiracy Theories - Interview Jeannie Banks Thomas I don’t know about you, but every day my husband comes home and informs me of the latest conspiracy theory he’s heard around the water cooler at work. About how the government is collapsing, the political parties are behind any number of heinous crimes, and of course that the constitution is hanging by a thread. Corona virus was created to get us all chipped through vaccines, and the powers that be are scheduled to shut down all business they don’t agree with through a manipulation of social media and the world’s banking structure. This was just last week… So, when I attended a lecture this past week, by Jeannie Banks Thomas, a professor of Folklore at Utah State University, and she provided a tool for honing in on Your Legend, Rumor, and Conspiracy Theory Detectors, I thought I’d get her on the show so the general public could use this acronym she calls SLAP - S L A P to determine the likelihood that the rumor is true. Stay tuned for some very helpful talk about legends, rumors and conspiracy theory’s during a time where we have more of these than we can begin to process.   Jeannie Banks Thomas is a folklorist and a Fellow of the American Folklore Society. She is the author or co-author of several books including Putting the Supernatural in Its Place (2015); Haunting Experiences (2007); Naked Barbies, Warrior Joes, and Other Forms of Visible Gender (2003); and Featherless Chickens, Laughing Women, and Serious Stories (1997). Two of her books have won international prizes. She is the co-director of USU’s Digital Folklore Project, which names the #DigitalTrendoftheYear, and she is an award-winning teacher. Additionally, her scholarly work has appeared in the Journal of American Folklore, Western Folklore, Journal of Folklore Research, Midwestern Folklore, and Contemporary Legend, among other journals. She is a professor at Utah State University. Welcome Jeannie to the Love Your Story podcast Listen in to the audio program for my discussion with Jeannie. 1. Why is a folklorist such a good person to address this topic? 2. What brought you to this area of research recently? 3. You have a tool for rapidly getting a sense of the veracity of legends, rumors and conspiracy theories, tell us what it is. SLAP -S is for “Scare” Test L is for “Logistics” Test A is for “A-List” Test P is for “Prejudice” Test 4. What websites can people check   Sooooo timely. With all the fake news and the open rumor venue of the internet, with all the dissension politically and the fear and rumor about sickness and apocalyptic revving, this voice of reason is a tool to help you not get pulled into false stories - which of course, the human race is famous for. It’s a tool to help you sort. Your challenge this week is to apply it to one of the rumors you hear and see how well it works. If you’re interested in signing your group up for the 21 Challenges….here’s a word from our sponsor….Insert See you in two weeks for the Love Your Story podcast.]]>Episode 191: A Tool for Testing Conspiracy Theories - Interview Jeannie Banks Thomas I don’t know about you, but every day my husband comes home and informs me of the latest conspiracy theory he’s heard around the water cooler at work. About how the government is collapsing, the political parties are behind any number of heinous crimes, and of course that the constitution is hanging by a thread. Corona virus was created to get us all chipped through vaccines, and the powers that be are scheduled to shut down all business they don’t agree with through a manipulation of social media and the world’s banking structure. This was just last week… So, when I attended a lecture this past week, by Jeannie Banks Thomas, a professor of Folklore at Utah State University, and she provided a tool for honing in on Your Legend, Rumor, and Conspiracy Theory Detectors, I thought I’d get her on the show so the general public could use this acronym she calls SLAP - S L A P to determine the likelihood that the rumor is true. Stay tuned for some very helpful talk about legends, rumors and conspiracy theory’s during a time where we have more of these than we can begin to process.   Jeannie Banks Thomas is a folklorist and a Fellow of the American Folklore Society. She is the author or co-author of several books including Putting the Supernatural in Its Place (2015); Haunting Experiences (2007); Naked Barbies, Warrior Joes, and Other Forms of Visible Gender (2003); and Featherless Chickens, Laughing Women, and Serious Stories (1997). Two of her books have won international prizes. She is the co-director of USU’s Digital Folklore Project, which names the #DigitalTrendoftheYear, and she is an award-winning teacher. Additionally, her scholarly work has appeared in the Journal of American Folklore, Western Folklore, Journal of Folklore Research, Midwestern Folklore, and Contemporary Legend, among other journals. She is a professor at Utah State University. Welcome Jeannie to the Love Your Story podcast Listen in to the audio program for my discussion with Jeannie. 1. Why is a folklorist such a good person to address this topic? 2. What brought you to this area of research recently? 3. You have a tool for rapidly getting a sense of the veracity of legends, rumors and conspiracy theories, tell us what it is. SLAP -S is for “Scare” Test L is for “Logistics” Test A is for “A-List” Test P is for “Prejudice” Test 4. What websites can people check   Sooooo timely. With all the fake news and the open rumor venue of the internet, with all the dissension politically and the fear and rumor about sickness and apocalyptic revving, this voice of reason is a tool to help you not get pulled into false stories - which of course, the human race is famous for. It’s a tool to help you sort. Your challenge this week is to apply it to one of the rumors you hear and see how well it works. If you’re interested in signing your group up for the 21 Challenges….here’s a word from our sponsor….Insert See you in two weeks for the Love Your Story podcast.]]>de866478-6a86-4480-b8fe-99f9fdd07a57Wed, 21 Apr 2021 07:00:00 -070029:52falsefull191191Lori LeeEpisode 190: Challenge #9 - Take Someone to LunchEpisode 190: Challenge #9 – Take Someone

      to Lunch

      We create. Everyday we create connection, chaos, possibility, drama, conversation, expectations, money, homes, relationships, works of art, friction, love, stories, or we don’t… Our power lies in our ability to direct our life story with every choice  and every thought. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast and the 21 Life Connection Challenges - 21 life hacks that have been set up to help you connect, take care of your fabulous self, create possibility in your one and only life, and get out of the dol drums or disconnect that’s been lingering around.  This series of podcasts highlight the challenges one-by-one, give you background on why the challenge was included in the 21 chosen challenges in the first place, provides a deeper understanding of the concept itself, and shares ideas on how to implement it. These simple challenges create big ah-ha’s and leave you with some great new tools to play with. Today we focus on Challenge 9. Take someone to lunch. Stay tuned for yummy talk.   When goldilocks carefully turned the door nob on the cottage of the three bears, she was just looking for a little food. Too hot? Too cold? Just right? If you’ve spent much time alone, you know a meal isn’t just right unless you’re sharing it with good company. And, if there’s one thing we all understand, it’s the power of a good meal. Mix the two - good company and good food, and it’s magic. My friends and I call it Breaking Bread Together. One year I did a cleanse. The premise was no food, but all the water (and a few mix-ins) that you wanted. What I noticed from the experience is that we humans spend A LOT of time focused on food. When we don’t have to eat, we get a lot more time to do other things- no lunch breaks or dinner hour, no grocery shopping, no meal planning, and interestingly, much less socializing. Suddenly I had an extra 4 hours in the day. A lot of our lives are spent connecting over food.   Welcome to Challenge #9 of the 21 Life Connection Challenges. Hopefully you’ve already tested 8 of the life hacks and you’ve already had some interesting experiences and some ah-ha moments. How do I know you’ve had some good stuff happen? Because everyone who does the challenges whole heartedly does. Yes, everyone.  Keep up the good work! You’re one of the doers in this world. Challenge #9, Take Someone to Lunch, is based on a three tier idea.  First, we need human connection and eating with friends or people we want to get to know is a casual and fun way to connect. And, you could even take it further. What if you invited the “other” to lunch? Someone with different political ideas, a different religion, a culture you didn’t understand, but could get a peak into over a beautiful lunch? Right now, in our current world of division, this angle creates a possibility of increased understanding and insight. Second, treating someone is an act of generosity that creates warmth and kindness in the world. Good Karma. By small and simple things are unexpected ripples started, and this act of generosity is one of the those stones thrown into a pond. Third, we all love good food. Celebrate a delicious moment in your day and make an affair of it. Being present with good food is one of life’s treasures. During Covid and the contemplation of the loss of taste and smell it really brought home the tragedy of no longer enjoying the delight of good food. When I did the interview with one of the first COVID patients in episode _______ and he shared how difficult eating was because he couldn’t taste or smell it, how it changed the nature of eating for him, I realized how tragic such a loss would be. Good food....]]>Episode 190: Challenge #9 – Take Someone

      to Lunch

      We create. Everyday we create connection, chaos, possibility, drama, conversation, expectations, money, homes, relationships, works of art, friction, love, stories, or we don’t… Our power lies in our ability to direct our life story with every choice  and every thought. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast and the 21 Life Connection Challenges - 21 life hacks that have been set up to help you connect, take care of your fabulous self, create possibility in your one and only life, and get out of the dol drums or disconnect that’s been lingering around.  This series of podcasts highlight the challenges one-by-one, give you background on why the challenge was included in the 21 chosen challenges in the first place, provides a deeper understanding of the concept itself, and shares ideas on how to implement it. These simple challenges create big ah-ha’s and leave you with some great new tools to play with. Today we focus on Challenge 9. Take someone to lunch. Stay tuned for yummy talk.   When goldilocks carefully turned the door nob on the cottage of the three bears, she was just looking for a little food. Too hot? Too cold? Just right? If you’ve spent much time alone, you know a meal isn’t just right unless you’re sharing it with good company. And, if there’s one thing we all understand, it’s the power of a good meal. Mix the two - good company and good food, and it’s magic. My friends and I call it Breaking Bread Together. One year I did a cleanse. The premise was no food, but all the water (and a few mix-ins) that you wanted. What I noticed from the experience is that we humans spend A LOT of time focused on food. When we don’t have to eat, we get a lot more time to do other things- no lunch breaks or dinner hour, no grocery shopping, no meal planning, and interestingly, much less socializing. Suddenly I had an extra 4 hours in the day. A lot of our lives are spent connecting over food.   Welcome to Challenge #9 of the 21 Life Connection Challenges. Hopefully you’ve already tested 8 of the life hacks and you’ve already had some interesting experiences and some ah-ha moments. How do I know you’ve had some good stuff happen? Because everyone who does the challenges whole heartedly does. Yes, everyone.  Keep up the good work! You’re one of the doers in this world. Challenge #9, Take Someone to Lunch, is based on a three tier idea.  First, we need human connection and eating with friends or people we want to get to know is a casual and fun way to connect. And, you could even take it further. What if you invited the “other” to lunch? Someone with different political ideas, a different religion, a culture you didn’t understand, but could get a peak into over a beautiful lunch? Right now, in our current world of division, this angle creates a possibility of increased understanding and insight. Second, treating someone is an act of generosity that creates warmth and kindness in the world. Good Karma. By small and simple things are unexpected ripples started, and this act of generosity is one of the those stones thrown into a pond. Third, we all love good food. Celebrate a delicious moment in your day and make an affair of it. Being present with good food is one of life’s treasures. During Covid and the contemplation of the loss of taste and smell it really brought home the tragedy of no longer enjoying the delight of good food. When I did the interview with one of the first COVID patients in episode _______ and he shared how difficult eating was because he couldn’t taste or smell it, how it changed the nature of eating for him, I realized how tragic such a loss would be. Good food. Connection. Enjoying the little things and making them a celebration. This is what we are about today. Laurie Colwin said, “One of the delights of life is eating with friends; second to that is talking about eating. And, for an unsurpassed double whammy, there is talking about eating while you are eating with friends.” How to do this challenge -  Choose someone you don’t usually take to lunch. Maybe it’s someone you’ve been wanting to get to know, or someone you need to connect with in your sphere of influence. What if it’s someone you love and haven't spent time with lately, or a neighbor you want to connect with. What if it’s someone you’ve noticed doesn’t have a lot of friends and could use some social time. Or perhaps the “other” a person different from you where you could expand your understanding by hearing from them - someone with a different political view or ideology. It never hurts to listen and gain understanding. What if it’s a lunch date with your child? Ok now, make plans to take them to lunch. Make sure they know it’s your treat. That being said, if eating out is not your bag, there’s nothing that says you can’t cook and stay in.  The first time I did this challenge I invited a colleague from the university over for soup and salad in my warm and homey kitchen. We sat, ate, chatted, caught up on a couple years of academic thought and gossip, and in the end those couple of hours were a brilliant investment in the friendship, in my network, in life. As with all the challenges. Enjoy the journey. Relish the preparation. Extend an official invite. Make it special this time around. We need more special moments, more good food, more time with good company, and an intent to connect deserves a special touch. What does a special touch look like? A written invitation? A heart-felt verbal invitation telling them you want to spend special time with them? A special place setting at a home table? Fine china? Someone’s favorite restaurant? Attention to detail? You decide… even small touches make the moment stand out.  Today you get to create a connection of your own, or set a date with someone to do so. And don’t forget to come back to your book and record how the whole thing went down.  Too hot? Too cold? Or Just Right? I’m betting on the latter.  Thanks for being here for a Love Your Story podcast. Go to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com for more great episodes, for links to buy your own copy of the book, and for links to sign up your group to do the challenges together - MASSIVE CONNECTION. See you in 2 weeks for the next episode of the Love Your Story podcast.  ]]>d7c9b437-752a-4679-b4bc-19eeac189fb2Wed, 07 Apr 2021 07:00:00 -070010:50falsefull190190Lori LeeEpisode 189: Makes Loaves, Not WarEpisode 189: Cuyler Black, 

      Make Loaves, Not War

      Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast. We all love a good story and today I bring you a story from one of my favorite cartoonists. Today’s episode features Cuyler Black. It’s story time. In his ever so humorous, and even joyfully irreverent way, Cuyler Black, a …. Minister, creates stories and comics that bring home important points with humor and humanizing. Today’s story - Make Loaves, Not War is a little reminder of what Christ meant about living with love and a poignant reminder that in the days of the Romans in Israel, a time of savage occupation, when people felt loyal to their politics, that it was ever so difficult to picture how a Savior could save his people with love.  I think it applies to the very situations we find ourselves in now. Enjoy. Make Loaves, Not War On a hilltop, late in the day, the disciples stood around Jesus. They watched as thousands of hungry people dined on five loaves of bread and two fish that had miraculously multiplied while being distributed in baskets among the crowd. “One guy asked if we multiplied anything for dessert, preferably a light sorbet,” said Nathanael. Peter snorted. “Where is he? I’ll feed him multiple knuckle sandwiches.” “Save your knuckles for those Pharisees over there,” muttered Andrew. “Look at them. Standing around trying to figure out how this free buffet violates the Torah.”  “Forget the Pharisees!” said Simon the Zealot. “It’s the Romans I’m looking forward to kicking in the gluteus maximus!” He turned to Jesus. “Rabbi, when does our real training begin?” “Real training?” said Jesus. “Yeah! I mean, today’s lesson on how to be waiters isn’t exactly what we signed up for.” Simon looked to the other disciples for confirmation, then spoke to Jesus again. “Look, you’re a natural leader. You’re driven and fearless. Not to mention you can control the weather and drop-kick demons. You’re the Messiah! And we all know you’re planning something big. Revolution! Insurrection against our oppressors! So train us! We’re your hand-picked revolutionaries!” “We’re totally committed,” said Philip. “We already ordered a bunch of these.” He held up a cap embroidered with the words Make Israel Great Again For the First Time in 900 Years But Who’s Counting? “And I made this!” said Thomas, unfurling a massive flag emblazoned with the name JESUS. “The flagpole has a spearhead at one end for impaling Roman soldiers!” “Boys, you don’t understand,” Jesus said. “I didn’t come to incite a violent rebellion against political authority. I’ve got bigger fish to fry.” “No more fish! We’re stuffed!” groaned a man sitting nearby. “Unless there’s dessert.” “Look,” Jesus continued. “My kingdom is not of this world. Kingdoms, empires, governments of this world will rise and fall, be good or bad, and even at their best are flawed. They are human constructions. Don’t put faith in them to solve every problem. Instead, put faith in your heavenly Father. Do you remember the prayer I taught you?” The disciples looked at him with blank stares. Andrew brightened. “Oh, I know! Rub-a-dub-dub, thanks for the—” “No,” said Jesus. “That wasn’t from me.” He sighed. “Let me remind you. It starts: Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.” “Right! Right!” said Peter. “Then it goes: ‘Give us today our daily bread! Forgive—’” “Enough bread!” a woman moaned. “Another crumb and I’ll hurl! … But is there dessert?” Jesus massaged his temples for a moment.“My point is that it’s God’s kingdom you ought to work to establish. Pray for his authority to govern every heart....]]>Episode 189: Cuyler Black, 

      Make Loaves, Not War

      Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast. We all love a good story and today I bring you a story from one of my favorite cartoonists. Today’s episode features Cuyler Black. It’s story time. In his ever so humorous, and even joyfully irreverent way, Cuyler Black, a …. Minister, creates stories and comics that bring home important points with humor and humanizing. Today’s story - Make Loaves, Not War is a little reminder of what Christ meant about living with love and a poignant reminder that in the days of the Romans in Israel, a time of savage occupation, when people felt loyal to their politics, that it was ever so difficult to picture how a Savior could save his people with love.  I think it applies to the very situations we find ourselves in now. Enjoy. Make Loaves, Not War On a hilltop, late in the day, the disciples stood around Jesus. They watched as thousands of hungry people dined on five loaves of bread and two fish that had miraculously multiplied while being distributed in baskets among the crowd. “One guy asked if we multiplied anything for dessert, preferably a light sorbet,” said Nathanael. Peter snorted. “Where is he? I’ll feed him multiple knuckle sandwiches.” “Save your knuckles for those Pharisees over there,” muttered Andrew. “Look at them. Standing around trying to figure out how this free buffet violates the Torah.”  “Forget the Pharisees!” said Simon the Zealot. “It’s the Romans I’m looking forward to kicking in the gluteus maximus!” He turned to Jesus. “Rabbi, when does our real training begin?” “Real training?” said Jesus. “Yeah! I mean, today’s lesson on how to be waiters isn’t exactly what we signed up for.” Simon looked to the other disciples for confirmation, then spoke to Jesus again. “Look, you’re a natural leader. You’re driven and fearless. Not to mention you can control the weather and drop-kick demons. You’re the Messiah! And we all know you’re planning something big. Revolution! Insurrection against our oppressors! So train us! We’re your hand-picked revolutionaries!” “We’re totally committed,” said Philip. “We already ordered a bunch of these.” He held up a cap embroidered with the words Make Israel Great Again For the First Time in 900 Years But Who’s Counting? “And I made this!” said Thomas, unfurling a massive flag emblazoned with the name JESUS. “The flagpole has a spearhead at one end for impaling Roman soldiers!” “Boys, you don’t understand,” Jesus said. “I didn’t come to incite a violent rebellion against political authority. I’ve got bigger fish to fry.” “No more fish! We’re stuffed!” groaned a man sitting nearby. “Unless there’s dessert.” “Look,” Jesus continued. “My kingdom is not of this world. Kingdoms, empires, governments of this world will rise and fall, be good or bad, and even at their best are flawed. They are human constructions. Don’t put faith in them to solve every problem. Instead, put faith in your heavenly Father. Do you remember the prayer I taught you?” The disciples looked at him with blank stares. Andrew brightened. “Oh, I know! Rub-a-dub-dub, thanks for the—” “No,” said Jesus. “That wasn’t from me.” He sighed. “Let me remind you. It starts: Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.” “Right! Right!” said Peter. “Then it goes: ‘Give us today our daily bread! Forgive—’” “Enough bread!” a woman moaned. “Another crumb and I’ll hurl! … But is there dessert?” Jesus massaged his temples for a moment.“My point is that it’s God’s kingdom you ought to work to establish. Pray for his authority to govern every heart. That’s what I’m here to teach and preach.” He turned to the crowd and raised his voice. “The kingdom of God is near! Repent and believe! Let your heavenly Father rule in your life, that you may love your enemies, bring good news to the poor, comfort the brokenhearted, proclaim liberty to the captives, bring justice to the oppressed, gather all nations to worship him, and prepare the way for a new heaven and a new earth!” Jesus’ arms were raised to the sky, and his face shone with the glory of God. A profound hush fell over the people as they contemplated it all. “Any word on the sorbet?” came a voice, breaking the silence. “Do you see how they hang on your every utterance, Master?” said Simon the Zealot. “You have them in the palm of your hand! I hear what you’re saying about a different kingdom, but this is a rare opportunity! There must be 5,000 men here! We can march straight to Jerusalem and overthrow the Romans!” Jesus glared at his disciples. “None of you have any part with me if you choose the path of violence and insurrection! My Father’s kingdom is a dominion of peace! Blessed are the peacemakers for they will be called the children of God!” His look softened. “Boys, it’s a hard thing I ask, but if you’re going to follow me, you must learn to love your enemies. You’ll have to put aside selfish impulses and deny yourselves. Can you do that?” One by one, the disciples nodded. Peter gave a thumbs-up. “Easy as pie.”  “PIE!!” shouted the people, as they all got to their feet and surged up the hill toward Jesus. Where to find Cuyler Black: https://www.cuylerblack.com As we strive to put back together a country torn apart by political differences, soaked in fear of the other, or just deeply unsettled and feeling disconnected, I hope you will take a moment to take stock of your thoughts, the power you have to create your own story, and check in with love, Your challenge is to see if you are putting aside selfish impulses in order to try and understand others, and to think about what it might look like to love your enemies….  Love all of you listeners and thank you for being here today. We’ll see you in two weeks for the next episode of the Love Your Story podcast. Live Big!]]>a0ac9673-315e-4f4c-9f87-22e1eb80bd58Wed, 24 Mar 2021 08:00:00 -070009:19falsefull189189Lori LeeEpisode 188 - Own Your StoryEpisode 188: Own Your Story It’s a fact that some people come through difficult times bitter, broken and cynical, while others emerge wiser, more empathetic and stronger. I believe the path connecting the two - the journey between the pain and the growth is maybe the most important part of the path. I have a story - it’s all mine. I write it everyday. Today I may throw in a plot twist as I get ready to change jobs, or free myself from a bad relationship, or adopt a child. I may create a peaceful scene at a coffee shop, because that sounds nice about now. And then maybe I feel like my story needs a little trip to the spa. I love girl spa days. They always look so great in the movies. Maybe I’ll have them put cucumbers on my eyes and cover my face in some gory green mud just so I know what that’s like. That sounds like a fun story to write. Or maybe I want to become an engineer or an opera singer…..hmmmmm what should I write on my life notebook today? Sometimes, someone else writes something we don’t like. A spouse gets abusive and all the sudden the story takes a dark unexpected turn that I get to frantically try to write myself out of. What about the shameful parts that have been shoved to the bottom of the story, a footnote we want no one to read ever? What about the fear of facing our dreams and failure and daring greatly?  While there are sometimes parts of our story that make us uncomfortable, part of loving your story is learning how to make peace with the bad as well as the good. At the very heart of learning to accept ourselves is learning to accept all the spaces we see as failures, short falls, down right horrible sections, the betrayals, the let-downs, the messy stuff we feel shame about.  This episode about owning your own story is not to focus on the rough spaces, but the rough spaces are a very real part of who we are, how we got to where we are, what we learned and how we see the world. We cannot be whole without the dark threads of our tapestry. So, let’s talk about owning it all!   It’s not a new story. It’s one we all know. You know the one, it’s where a personal loss or tragedy or need takes you to the realm from which you are certain you will never return. It’s the dark-days-of-the-soul story. I’ve noticed a few things about this part of life. #1 - It’s a sacred space. It’s often a private space, one where the deepest details are kept in our vaults for we can’t bear to show too much humanness, our mistakes, our heart ache, our private travails, our crawling, our moments of shaking our fist at heaven. #2 - That everyone has these. While we may feel we are alone and life has dealt unjustly with us, that no-one in our circles would ever understand, the truth is we must each traverse this path on the hero’s journey, because it is how the hero becomes the hero. It’s an important part of being alive.  The other day I spoke with a man who was absolutely crushed. After years of fighting an addiction and begging God for help, never to receive any additional and heavenly support by his estimation, his world began to crumble. If God wasn’t there to help him beat the very darkness God claims to want to pull us out of, then could God really be there? The idea that his sincerest cries from an aching heart were not enough, not worthy of the ear of God, only exacerbated his hopelessness, and where was he to go if everything he had believed in, his foundation, was not there to support his wobbly heart? His face crumbled in tears and his sobs tore at my heart.  This was a dark day of the soul.  I spoke with a woman who told me of 5 years of going without sleep as she raised 3 toddlers who seemed to never sleep....]]>Episode 188: Own Your Story It’s a fact that some people come through difficult times bitter, broken and cynical, while others emerge wiser, more empathetic and stronger. I believe the path connecting the two - the journey between the pain and the growth is maybe the most important part of the path. I have a story - it’s all mine. I write it everyday. Today I may throw in a plot twist as I get ready to change jobs, or free myself from a bad relationship, or adopt a child. I may create a peaceful scene at a coffee shop, because that sounds nice about now. And then maybe I feel like my story needs a little trip to the spa. I love girl spa days. They always look so great in the movies. Maybe I’ll have them put cucumbers on my eyes and cover my face in some gory green mud just so I know what that’s like. That sounds like a fun story to write. Or maybe I want to become an engineer or an opera singer…..hmmmmm what should I write on my life notebook today? Sometimes, someone else writes something we don’t like. A spouse gets abusive and all the sudden the story takes a dark unexpected turn that I get to frantically try to write myself out of. What about the shameful parts that have been shoved to the bottom of the story, a footnote we want no one to read ever? What about the fear of facing our dreams and failure and daring greatly?  While there are sometimes parts of our story that make us uncomfortable, part of loving your story is learning how to make peace with the bad as well as the good. At the very heart of learning to accept ourselves is learning to accept all the spaces we see as failures, short falls, down right horrible sections, the betrayals, the let-downs, the messy stuff we feel shame about.  This episode about owning your own story is not to focus on the rough spaces, but the rough spaces are a very real part of who we are, how we got to where we are, what we learned and how we see the world. We cannot be whole without the dark threads of our tapestry. So, let’s talk about owning it all!   It’s not a new story. It’s one we all know. You know the one, it’s where a personal loss or tragedy or need takes you to the realm from which you are certain you will never return. It’s the dark-days-of-the-soul story. I’ve noticed a few things about this part of life. #1 - It’s a sacred space. It’s often a private space, one where the deepest details are kept in our vaults for we can’t bear to show too much humanness, our mistakes, our heart ache, our private travails, our crawling, our moments of shaking our fist at heaven. #2 - That everyone has these. While we may feel we are alone and life has dealt unjustly with us, that no-one in our circles would ever understand, the truth is we must each traverse this path on the hero’s journey, because it is how the hero becomes the hero. It’s an important part of being alive.  The other day I spoke with a man who was absolutely crushed. After years of fighting an addiction and begging God for help, never to receive any additional and heavenly support by his estimation, his world began to crumble. If God wasn’t there to help him beat the very darkness God claims to want to pull us out of, then could God really be there? The idea that his sincerest cries from an aching heart were not enough, not worthy of the ear of God, only exacerbated his hopelessness, and where was he to go if everything he had believed in, his foundation, was not there to support his wobbly heart? His face crumbled in tears and his sobs tore at my heart.  This was a dark day of the soul.  I spoke with a woman who told me of 5 years of going without sleep as she raised 3 toddlers who seemed to never sleep. On her last wits end there were days she would beg God for someone to show up and take care of her children so she could get one night of sleep - but no one came. There were times she would shake her son to get him to be quiet, or hit him, or even kick him when her repressed anger could no longer be held back. She was filled with shame over these actions because she knew better, but she could not handle the endless lack of sleep, and she discovered a deep hidden anger had built up. Her shame at the things she had done was buried deep and she had to find her way out.   As I prayed and pondered, demanded that God show up for those who needed him, I received an impression, the image of the caterpillar who must make it’s own way from the chrysalis; the rose who cannot be pried open early or it never flowers; the baby bird who must break its own way out of the egg so it has the strength to live.  The dark night of the soul is for everyone, even the ones we love and hate to see suffer. It must be this way because  we become through our struggle. I mention these examples, not to say that God never shows up - he often does; but when he doesn’t seem to, the path ahead has different purposes - leading you - us - to what we need to be, who we need to be. For example, the woman who was so tired she couldn’t mother well eventually found a 12-step program that was very influential in helping her become the person she needed to become in her future life. She needed to seek out that process, learn it, and become. It was part of taking her to her best story. We only know that now because we are looking back 20 years. But that’s how it goes. Hindsight teaches us many things. So….When we can accept that these painful, personal spaces are normal and a part of all good stories, we can then move on to a realization that the dark nights of the soul are not places to hide from in shame. They need not be a thing that separates us from our human family, when in fact, they are our common thread. They bring us to the beauty of such things as empathy, understanding, perspective and depth, not to mention a compilation of other things we might need, a great class, a teacher, a support group, a 12-step program, a new perspective, a struggle born of grief that yields beautiful things.  Trust the process. When we chisel our way out of our shell with our own little beak, we gain everything.  Oprah, in her book, What I Know For Sure, shared her shameful hidden story, and I’d like to share it with you here: She says, “For years, I had a secret that almost no one knew. Even Gayle, who knew everything about me, wasn’t aware of it until several years into our friendship. I hid it until I felt safe enough to share: the years I was sexually abused, from age 10-14, my resulting promiscuity, and finally, at 14, my becoming pregnant. I was so ashamed I hid the pregnancy until my doctor noticed my swollen ankles and belly. I gave birth in 1968; the baby died in the hospital weeks later. I want back to school and told no one. My fear was that if I were found out, I would be expelled. So I carried the secret into my future, always afraid that if anyone discovered what had happened, they too would expel me from their lives. Even when I found the courage to publicly reveal the abuse, I still cared the shame and kept the pregnancy a secret. When a family member who has since died, leaked this story to the tabloids, everything changed. I felt devastated. Wounded. Betrayed. How could this person do this to me? I cried and cried….When I dragged myself from my bed for work on Monday morning after the news broke, I felt beaten and scared. I imagined that every person on the street was going to point their finger at me and scream, “pregnant at fourteen you wicked girl…expelled!” No one said a word, through —not strangers, not the people I knew. I was shocked. Nobody treated me differently. For decades, I had been expecting a reaction that never came….I soon realized that having the secret out was liberating. Not until then could I begin repairing the damage done to my spirit as a young girl. What I learned for sure was that holding the shame was the greatest burden of all.” So, while it is often private, a dragon we must face to stretch our souls, we are not a lone creature who cannot be understood, a pioneer of pain. No, we are human, we are part of a greater whole, we are trusted, we are growing, and sometimes we must simply reach out of the hole we find ourselves in, ask for a hand to hold, another human, or angel to connect with long enough to get the strength for one more day. The struggle is the dance. Now, every story is different. Every dark day of the soul is individual. But what stays the same is our humanness and also that voice that tells you that if people knew how broken you are, or what you had done, or how screwed up you really are, how you handled some difficult emotion, some vice you allowed, some forgiveness withheld, some shame no one can ever know….if they knew, your children would not love you, your parents would dis-own you, your friends would leave in droves, and your therapist would stay, but only for the money….  I suspect we all hear this voice. Are we unlovable because of our true stories? Sometimes it feels like that, but in reality we can expand, become more full of love, more human and more god-like at once because of the sacredness of our true stories. Take a deep breath, close your eyes, accept that this is a part of being here. The price to play the game, especially if you’re playing big, trusting, stretching, trying….is vulnerability and sometimes pain, but YOUR pain makes you who you are, and accepting your story tapestry with all the dark threads as well as the colorful, shining threads is what makes a beautiful tapestry and a beautiful story. Your challenge for this week is to dig into your heart, in that little space you hope to hide, that sacred, child-like space that fears exposure and name your feelings about the darker threads of your tapestry, and then extend compassion to that younger you. We all do the best we can with the tools we have in the moment. We live, we learn….accept all of it, all of you, your whole experience, and let it be what it is. It’s okay. Own your whole story. It’s the first step to loving it. Closing ad: If you are a leader of a group - formal or information - book club, down-line, head of Human Resources department, head of a youth group, - I want to work with your group to help you connect and create better results on purpose. 2021 is the focus on groups doing the 21 challenges and I’ve set up a great platform with discussion wall, audio and video support, leader boards and badges, and personalized guiding. Go to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com or call me at 801 663 6964 for a chat about if it’s right for your group. 801 663 6964.]]>d9427faf-226d-4fd8-af6c-5455844126fbWed, 10 Mar 2021 08:00:00 -070017:45falsefull188188Lori LeeEpisode 187 - Spiritual Gifts: Interview Deb AtellaEpisode 187 - Spiritual Gifts:

      Interview Deb Atella

      Have you ever wondered what your spiritual gifts are? What is a spiritual gift? Spiritual gifts are acknowledged as  word of wisdom, the word of knowledge, increased faith, the gifts of healing, the gift of miracles, the gift of prophecy, the discernment of spirits, diverse kinds of tongues, interpretation of tongues.  I’m still not certain what mine are, but I have noticed and interacted with others who have the spiritual gift of connecting to angels and spiritual communication - the discernment of spirits. In this case, Deb Atella is open to sharing her near death experience and her path to tapping into her intuitive spiritual gifts. I like these stories of finding and figuring out spiritual gifts because it shines a light on how it happens…. Stay tuned to hear her detailed story and how she figured out what her gifts were and how to manage them. And then she shares  3 tips she’s learned for resilient living. Deb Atella is the creator of the Sisterhood of What Next?! FB group and the host of the soon to be released aTella Like it is podcast. She is an expert at creating morning routines to set your day up for success and joy and an expert in teaching  people how to differentiate between their ego running the show and their soul/higher-self/intuition running the show.  Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Let’s start where we always do. What is your story? In 2005 you had a near death experience and experiences with seeing family members who had passed away. Can you take us back to that story…. TUNE INTO THE AUDIO PROGRAM TO HEAR OUR DISCUSSION AND HEAR THE ANSWERS TO THESE QUESTIONS: What did that teach you? So you had spiritual gifts that started to manifest at that time. How did you deal with that? You started meditating back in 2012, but didn’t make it a habit until 2017. That daily meditation habit led you to creating a clarity and enjoyment of life that you hadn’t experienced before. It also led you to finally opening up to your spiritual gifts that started manifesting in 2005. How did you embrace those? So…let’s get to the promised skills. How do we learn resilience? What transition skills can you share with us? TO CONTACT DEB ATELLA:
      debatella@gmail.com
      hideb@deborahatella.com
      Instagram @Episode 187 - Spiritual Gifts:

      Interview Deb Atella

      Have you ever wondered what your spiritual gifts are? What is a spiritual gift? Spiritual gifts are acknowledged as  word of wisdom, the word of knowledge, increased faith, the gifts of healing, the gift of miracles, the gift of prophecy, the discernment of spirits, diverse kinds of tongues, interpretation of tongues.  I’m still not certain what mine are, but I have noticed and interacted with others who have the spiritual gift of connecting to angels and spiritual communication - the discernment of spirits. In this case, Deb Atella is open to sharing her near death experience and her path to tapping into her intuitive spiritual gifts. I like these stories of finding and figuring out spiritual gifts because it shines a light on how it happens…. Stay tuned to hear her detailed story and how she figured out what her gifts were and how to manage them. And then she shares  3 tips she’s learned for resilient living. Deb Atella is the creator of the Sisterhood of What Next?! FB group and the host of the soon to be released aTella Like it is podcast. She is an expert at creating morning routines to set your day up for success and joy and an expert in teaching  people how to differentiate between their ego running the show and their soul/higher-self/intuition running the show.  Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Let’s start where we always do. What is your story? In 2005 you had a near death experience and experiences with seeing family members who had passed away. Can you take us back to that story…. TUNE INTO THE AUDIO PROGRAM TO HEAR OUR DISCUSSION AND HEAR THE ANSWERS TO THESE QUESTIONS: What did that teach you? So you had spiritual gifts that started to manifest at that time. How did you deal with that? You started meditating back in 2012, but didn’t make it a habit until 2017. That daily meditation habit led you to creating a clarity and enjoyment of life that you hadn’t experienced before. It also led you to finally opening up to your spiritual gifts that started manifesting in 2005. How did you embrace those? So…let’s get to the promised skills. How do we learn resilience? What transition skills can you share with us? TO CONTACT DEB ATELLA:

      debatella@gmail.com

      hideb@deborahatella.com

      Instagram @deborahatella

      Facebook @debatella and Sisterhood of What Next?!

      Website: www.deborahatella.com

      Be compassionate with yourself, Find stillness and stay in gratitude. These tips are so beautiful for living well.  Your challenge this week is to find spaces to implement these 3 tips. Perhaps as you love on your self and sit still and listen with gratitude, you will find more recognition of your own spiritual gift. It’s also said that we can ask for spiritual gifts - seek after the ones we want. So, that’s a little something to think about. The world needs powerful, gifted souls to walk with light and shine that light on the world. If you feel that call, know that you can seek for and develop your own spiritual gifts. Remember that 2021 is the year of the 21 Challenges - Group Style. Sign up your group now for a three week ride of connection and fun during a time that we all so badly need it. www.loveyourstorypodcast.com for more info. See you in two weeks for the next episode.]]>426114e7-54b3-4128-abc7-b5b31289ff6eWed, 24 Feb 2021 09:00:00 -070047:07falsefull187187Lori LeeEpisode 186 - What You Focus on ExpandsEpisode 186 What You Focus on Expands

      The Law of Perpetual Transmutation

      If what you focus on expands let’s make damn sure we are focusing on things we want to expand. Do you want your waistline to expand? Do you want your bills to expand? Do you want your ornery neighbor to spend more time staring over your fence? Do you want the effects of COVID to have more power in your life? Nah….let’s think about things we do want. What do you think of focusing on the things you CAN do and not the things you CAN’T do? What do you think about focusing on your strengths rather than your weaknesses? How much more fun and productive is that? What do you think about imagining your ideal life, in all aspects, and putting it out there to expand and come into being? If I focus on my ability to throw a great party and giving people a space to connect in (a strength), rather than beating myself up over not being a great promoter personality (not a gift I possess)- well, one is productive and the other destructive. Let’s focus on things we want more of….because that’s how we get them. In 1847 Thomas Edison was born. He was easily distracted in school and he didn’t get good grades. Kids teased him and teachers called him “dim.” He was from a poor family growing up, so he would find ways to make money to buy supplies for his “lab.” He started a newspaper in his teens, the Weekly Herald, and he knew how to focus. Thomas Edison was known as - The Wizard of Menlo Park, and his inventions where called “Edison’s Miracles.” He could boast of over 1000 inventions. The phonograph, the electric lamp, the telegraph improvements, telephone work, batteries, to name only a few. How did he do it? As I studied Thomas Edison’s biography I think “focus” could be the word to best describe him. He was obsessed with his work and would sometimes work 100 hours a week. He didn’t sleep much, and while I don’t advise this, he left his wife on his wedding day to run to his lab and forgot to come back because of his focus on a project. Thomas Edison created a life story that was rich in creation, rich in money - he was a millionaire at age 40 - and rich in accomplishment. Now, he may not have had the best personal relationships because he didn’t focus on those. But he had the life he had because of what he focused on, because he never let that focus on his lab or creations waiver, even when he had failed repeatedly. We all know his quote, “Results? I’ve got a lot of results. I know 50,000 things that won’t work.” I share this as an easy example of focus. When we focus our time, our heart, our money, and our vision on a thing we can all move mountains. But it’s more than just hard work. Let’s talk about the Law of Perpetual Transmutation.

      - Law of Perpetual Transmutation

      As 2020 launched I proclaimed that it was a year where I would study the laws of the universe. I focused on and got around to only one - it was the first one in Leslie Householder’s book Hidden Treasures. Much of what I’ll talk about regarding this law, aside from my personal experiences, come from the things she teaches. I highly recommend her work. What is the law of Perpetual Transmutation? In a nutshell, it simply means that everything is in the process of either coming into physical form or breaking down and going out of it. The premise behind this law is one of creation. We actively create with our thoughts all the time. The things we focus on with real intent, belief, and consistency start to manifest and show up in our lives. There should be a big label stamped on our brains - a big red warning sign. “Dangerous if used in correctly.” Because this works regarding good and bad. Let’s do a quick exercise - Look at your life right now. Whatever you have created - whatever you are dealing with - whatever you have, has been formed by your thoughts. You may not have brought all the]]>Episode 186 What You Focus on Expands

      The Law of Perpetual Transmutation

      If what you focus on expands let’s make damn sure we are focusing on things we want to expand. Do you want your waistline to expand? Do you want your bills to expand? Do you want your ornery neighbor to spend more time staring over your fence? Do you want the effects of COVID to have more power in your life? Nah….let’s think about things we do want. What do you think of focusing on the things you CAN do and not the things you CAN’T do? What do you think about focusing on your strengths rather than your weaknesses? How much more fun and productive is that? What do you think about imagining your ideal life, in all aspects, and putting it out there to expand and come into being? If I focus on my ability to throw a great party and giving people a space to connect in (a strength), rather than beating myself up over not being a great promoter personality (not a gift I possess)- well, one is productive and the other destructive. Let’s focus on things we want more of….because that’s how we get them. In 1847 Thomas Edison was born. He was easily distracted in school and he didn’t get good grades. Kids teased him and teachers called him “dim.” He was from a poor family growing up, so he would find ways to make money to buy supplies for his “lab.” He started a newspaper in his teens, the Weekly Herald, and he knew how to focus. Thomas Edison was known as - The Wizard of Menlo Park, and his inventions where called “Edison’s Miracles.” He could boast of over 1000 inventions. The phonograph, the electric lamp, the telegraph improvements, telephone work, batteries, to name only a few. How did he do it? As I studied Thomas Edison’s biography I think “focus” could be the word to best describe him. He was obsessed with his work and would sometimes work 100 hours a week. He didn’t sleep much, and while I don’t advise this, he left his wife on his wedding day to run to his lab and forgot to come back because of his focus on a project. Thomas Edison created a life story that was rich in creation, rich in money - he was a millionaire at age 40 - and rich in accomplishment. Now, he may not have had the best personal relationships because he didn’t focus on those. But he had the life he had because of what he focused on, because he never let that focus on his lab or creations waiver, even when he had failed repeatedly. We all know his quote, “Results? I’ve got a lot of results. I know 50,000 things that won’t work.” I share this as an easy example of focus. When we focus our time, our heart, our money, and our vision on a thing we can all move mountains. But it’s more than just hard work. Let’s talk about the Law of Perpetual Transmutation.

      - Law of Perpetual Transmutation

      As 2020 launched I proclaimed that it was a year where I would study the laws of the universe. I focused on and got around to only one - it was the first one in Leslie Householder’s book Hidden Treasures. Much of what I’ll talk about regarding this law, aside from my personal experiences, come from the things she teaches. I highly recommend her work. What is the law of Perpetual Transmutation? In a nutshell, it simply means that everything is in the process of either coming into physical form or breaking down and going out of it. The premise behind this law is one of creation. We actively create with our thoughts all the time. The things we focus on with real intent, belief, and consistency start to manifest and show up in our lives. There should be a big label stamped on our brains - a big red warning sign. “Dangerous if used in correctly.” Because this works regarding good and bad. Let’s do a quick exercise - Look at your life right now. Whatever you have created - whatever you are dealing with - whatever you have, has been formed by your thoughts. You may not have brought all the circumstances into your life, but you have decided how to think about them and how much to let them bother or bolster you. If you look around and see lack and disappointment, let that be a sign that your thoughts get to shift to bring you something different. If you look around and feel gratitude, happiness with your relationships, contentment with the things you have, take full credit for that. You have created that also. Let me share an example - If your relationships are lacking, take an internal audit of what you focus on in those relationships. If things are bad with a significant other are you focusing on what they do wrong, on what they don’t bring to the table, on what they do that bothers you, on how you feel they fall short? If you do, justified as you may feel, those will be the things you see. Let’s pull in the car example - you know how it goes. The minute you buy a make and model of a certain car you will see them everywhere, where before you didn’t notice them nearly so much. If I buy a white Subaru I’m going to see white Subarus everywhere. My experience of them expands. If I’m focusing, say on my child, and I’m frustrated because her grades aren’t as good as her brothers, well that is going to expand. It’s going to become something that is always on your mind, something that begins to define her, something that takes root as a deficiency. If I choose to focus on the classes she is getting the best grades in and praise her, that will expand. If I focus on her strengths, she’ll feel loved and seek to expand those. Have you ever read the book, “As a Man Thinketh,” by James Allen? He died in 1912, it’s an older book, but a classic. Here is a quote from this small, easy read, “Man is made or unmade by himself; in the armory of thought he forges the weapons by which he destroys himself. He also fashions the tools with which he builds for himself heavenly mansions of joy and strength and peace. By the right choice and true application of thought, man ascends to the Divine Perfection; by the abuse and wrong application of thought, he descends below the level of the beast. Between these two extremes are all the grades of character, and man is their maker and master. Of all the beautiful truths pertaining to the soul which have been restored and brought to light in this age, none is more gladdening or fruitful of divine promise and confidence than this – that man is the master of thought, the molder of character, and maker and shaper of condition, environment, and destiny. As a being of Power, Intelligence, and Love, and the lord of his own thoughts, man holds the key to every situation, and contains within himself that transforming and regenerative agency by which he may make himself what he wills.” So - let’s get back to the law. The Law of Perpetual Transmutation says that everything is in the process of coming into physical form or going out of it. The power of our thoughts is what starts the formation of something - all things are created spiritually before they are created physically, and our thoughts begin the process of matter taking form into spiritual creation so it can manifest physically. Just think - everything had to be thought of before it could be created. All things are made of a thinking substance - intelligence, that begins to form as we call it forth. When we know how to tap into this law and use it, we start learning to create intentionally. The power comes from three main things - 1. You have to be able to very clearly see the finished goal/project/result. What does the problem look like solved? 2. You must be able to pull in emotion - because emotion is the power that imprints things in our subconscious and supercharges those thoughts. So… What does the woman/man who has accomplished that feel like? Stay in that place and revel in those emotions. 3. Your faith or fear is the lever that sends the energy forward or backward. Picture something manifesting from the ether, taking form in front of you, and each time you truly believe it is coming the thing becomes more solid. Each time you doubt it moves backward, becomes less tangible, more ethereal. When we feel fear remember the scripture, “Peace be Still. Be still and know that I am god.” Another favorite… “For God has not given us the spirit of fear but of power and of love and of a sound mind. 2 Timothy 1:7 Russel M. Neilsen, prophet of the Latter Day Saint church, said, “If you really want a certain blessing, you’d better find out what the laws are that govern that blessing and then work on becoming obedient to those laws.” For us, it comes back to trust in the law, faith in things we can’t see. Trust that the way will show up. Trust the process. It is important that you make the commitment to reach the goal, to see it done. It is important that you move forward with faith. Let’s bring in a few scriptures that back-up this law… James 1:6 - Ask in faith nothing wavering. Matthew 21:22 And all things whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive. Enos 1:15 - Whatsoever thing ye shall ask in faith believing that ye shall receive, in the name of Christ, ye shall receive it. Now let’s talk personal experience. Since I’ve worked on understanding this law better this year, of course I need to have tried it out. Here are a couple success stories: This year my son moved out and I turned his room into my office. I wanted to be thoughtful about placing only the minimum of what I needed, and the exact right stuff in the office because I didn’t want clutter or unsightly spaces with funky energy to throw off my work. I had everything finished but I still needed a couch or a chair to the space across from my desk. Should I buy it or should I try to manifest it? I went shopping, I got ideas, I waited to see what may turn up. I had pictured it, numerous times. I did have intent. But still I waited, just in case it might appear. Well, it did…..I found a couch. More accurately, a friend who knew I was looking for a coach texted from the storage facility where she worked and said, someone just cleaned out their unit and left a perfect brown leather couch for the taking. “If you don’t want it,” she threatened, “I’m totally taking it.” It turned out to be perfect for that little spot beneath my office window. It was exactly the right height, the right length, and the right color. Thank you, angels and fun universal law. I also think I manifested my first podcast editor. I was in a coaching group and we had set an intention for finding someone to pick up the slack in the areas I did not have competent skills. I imagined and prayed and the next day I was walking my dog when I ran into some beloved neighbors I hadn’t seen and talked to in some time, only to find out that he was the camera man for the BYU TV series StoryTrek, he was steeped in story, and he knew how to edit audio. This kicked off a partnership that I will forever be grateful for. And finally - 1. I set a big goal this past year as I was testing the law. It was a big financial goal. I’m not comfortable going into all the details around it, but here are some things I noticed. First, I followed all the steps of seeing it, feeling it, being grateful for it. I didn’t know how it would happen, but I put the wheels in motion….and as Leslie Householder says, “Stay Calm and see what happens.” As the year unfolded I took every work opportunity that came to me. I serviced more real estate clients in 2020 than I had in my previous 13 years as a Realtor. I got more professional writing jobs at higher pay rates than I’d ever been paid before. I said daily gratitudes, I worked hard, really hard. Here’s what I noticed. The first time, I think it was about June, that I put down a major chunk of change toward this goal. My willingness to put my skin in the game toward my goal escalated what the universe was bringing to me. I find this fascinating. I have no additional thoughts on it, just an observation that came up during my test of the law. We have to be behind our own dreams and willing to do our part. Another thing I noticed, unexpected things came up - not that they should have been unexpected, but in my case I hadn’t thought it all through. As I had calculated the amounts needed I had been looking at flat sums. I also needed to figure in taxes and tithing and keeping a base line, etc. etc. But I think this is par for all courses. There will always be unexpected aspects of what we manifest and we have to be open to how things will twist and turn along the way. So…. In a nutshell. I’ve watched things large and small expand as I focus. Try it. As I close out this episode let’s go over the steps of manifesting through the universal law of transmutation - Now, remember universal laws are laws. The law of gravity works whether you believe it will or not. It does what it does. So do all the other laws. The Law of Perpetual Transmutation will always work - things will either come into being or go out of being, according to your faith. Let’s review and I encourage you to do your own tests, if you’re interested. Step 1: Get a clear vision of what you want. Trust your instincts. Go all the way through the vision of what it feels like to have it done. Feel real gratitude for it. Step 2: Present it for approval, adjustment and direction to your higher power. The voice of inspiration will come only after you have a clear picture of what you seek and after you allow gratitude - true gratitude for what you received in enjoying that success. Just check in. Step 3: Adjust as inspired. What can I do? What do I need to leave to the universe? Step 4: Acknowledge the successful completion for with God as your partner all things are possible. Nourish the seed with belief and gratitude and all you need will come. - Do you notice how belief and gratitude are a part of every step? Step 5: Move forward each day. Stay in Belief. Our thoughts are powerful - they do things. Our thoughts do more than we realize. If you can picture what you want, and believe it’s on its way, by God’s law it must come. Keep discarding fear and nurturing belief. Keep that focus! In conclusion I’ll end with a Tony Robbins quote: “Your life is determined by what you focus on.” Truth is truth. Your challenge for this week is to think of something, large or small, that you’d really like to have in your life, and then apply the steps we talked about. Start small first, if you want. Here’s a quick ad: In January we launched the platform for group leaders to bring their groups to Love Your Story for the 21-Challenges. If you’re a leader who believes in self-improvement for your team, group or downline, and you need to create better connection with your people, let me help you - we are set up and ready to book your 21 days to connection and improved life performance. Go to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com for more information. See you in two weeks.  ]]>33d7f24c-0bd9-46ca-884c-9cbb180d2b9dWed, 10 Feb 2021 08:00:00 -070024:25falsefull186186Lori LeeEpisode 185: A Story About Life on the Trail – Interview Barney “Scout” MannEpisode 185: A Story About Life on the Trail - Interview Barney "Scout" Mann Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast. As you may or may not know I am an avid hiker. I am the author of two editions of The Best Hikes Near Salt Lake City, published by Falcon Guides. I’m the author of Wild Weekends in Utah, and The Best Snowshoe Trails of the Wasatch. Because of my love of being on the trails, in nature, I have harbored secret desires to hike the countries longest trails - the real crow jewels. They are so long though that it takes months to through hike them and it takes a special time - no job, extra money, .… In the end, of course, those are all excuses. A few years back I hopped on the Appalachian trail and hiked the northern section and climbed the tallest peak in Maine, Mt. Katahdin. - the northern terminus of the trail. I swam naked in a stream and remember being eaten alive by the worst mosquitoes I’ve ever experienced that night in camp. But I sure love that photo on the top Mt, Katahdin. Well, today we get a fabulous pleasure to hear stories from Barney - trail name Scout - Mann about the Pacific Crest Trail and his book Journeys North. Tune in for stories of the trail and what it’s like to hike thousands of miles.   Barney Scout Mann is one of the rare individuals who have hiked America’s Triple Crown - The Appalachian, Continental Divide, and Pacific Crest trails. For those of you who are unfamiliar with these trails they are the longest trails in the country. The Pacific Crest Trail is 2650 miles long and covers 26 national forests, 7 national parks, 5 state parks and 3 national monuments. It takes 5 months at an average of 20 miles a day. The Appalachian Trail is 2180 miles and the Continental Divide Trail is 3100 miles. On top of that he and his wife Sandy have also hosted thousands of Pacific Crest Trail hopefuls in their San Diego home as they get ready to hit the trail. You may be familiar with the Pacific Crest Trail from the popular book and movie Wild - From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail, by Cheryl Strayed. I can’t tell you how many questions I have about those trails, but I think what’s going to be most interesting is the stories. Let me tell you a little bit more about Scout - Barney Scout Mann is also the author of the book Journey’s North - the Pacific Crest Trail, and it’s said it is the next best thing to being on the PCT yourself. In this book he follows a selection of hikers that he and his wife got close to along the trail and tells their story. Let me read this review - “Few things are more innately human, rooted deeply in our shared history, than storytelling and traversing land masses on foot. In Journeys North, master story teller Barney Scout Mann invites us to gather around his campfire as he weaves the narrative of ordinary people hiking thousands of miles across desert and mountains. The unfolding of their stories against eh backdrop of nature at her most sublime, and her most fierce, reveals their primal humanness in powerful relief. Their interactions, with nature and with each other, prove that we are more connected and wildly capable than we believe. Tune into the audio program to hear my interview with Scout.

      Where to find a copy of Journey's North

      Order Journeys North on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Journeys-North-Pacific-Crest-Trail/dp/1680513214/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=Journeys+North&qid=1607558123&sr=8-1 or order a copy signed by the author from his website: http://www.barneyscoutmann.com   No matter your journey or story line, one of the things you...]]>Episode 185: A Story About Life on the Trail - Interview Barney "Scout" Mann Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast. As you may or may not know I am an avid hiker. I am the author of two editions of The Best Hikes Near Salt Lake City, published by Falcon Guides. I’m the author of Wild Weekends in Utah, and The Best Snowshoe Trails of the Wasatch. Because of my love of being on the trails, in nature, I have harbored secret desires to hike the countries longest trails - the real crow jewels. They are so long though that it takes months to through hike them and it takes a special time - no job, extra money, .… In the end, of course, those are all excuses. A few years back I hopped on the Appalachian trail and hiked the northern section and climbed the tallest peak in Maine, Mt. Katahdin. - the northern terminus of the trail. I swam naked in a stream and remember being eaten alive by the worst mosquitoes I’ve ever experienced that night in camp. But I sure love that photo on the top Mt, Katahdin. Well, today we get a fabulous pleasure to hear stories from Barney - trail name Scout - Mann about the Pacific Crest Trail and his book Journeys North. Tune in for stories of the trail and what it’s like to hike thousands of miles.   Barney Scout Mann is one of the rare individuals who have hiked America’s Triple Crown - The Appalachian, Continental Divide, and Pacific Crest trails. For those of you who are unfamiliar with these trails they are the longest trails in the country. The Pacific Crest Trail is 2650 miles long and covers 26 national forests, 7 national parks, 5 state parks and 3 national monuments. It takes 5 months at an average of 20 miles a day. The Appalachian Trail is 2180 miles and the Continental Divide Trail is 3100 miles. On top of that he and his wife Sandy have also hosted thousands of Pacific Crest Trail hopefuls in their San Diego home as they get ready to hit the trail. You may be familiar with the Pacific Crest Trail from the popular book and movie Wild - From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail, by Cheryl Strayed. I can’t tell you how many questions I have about those trails, but I think what’s going to be most interesting is the stories. Let me tell you a little bit more about Scout - Barney Scout Mann is also the author of the book Journey’s North - the Pacific Crest Trail, and it’s said it is the next best thing to being on the PCT yourself. In this book he follows a selection of hikers that he and his wife got close to along the trail and tells their story. Let me read this review - “Few things are more innately human, rooted deeply in our shared history, than storytelling and traversing land masses on foot. In Journeys North, master story teller Barney Scout Mann invites us to gather around his campfire as he weaves the narrative of ordinary people hiking thousands of miles across desert and mountains. The unfolding of their stories against eh backdrop of nature at her most sublime, and her most fierce, reveals their primal humanness in powerful relief. Their interactions, with nature and with each other, prove that we are more connected and wildly capable than we believe. Tune into the audio program to hear my interview with Scout.

      Where to find a copy of Journey's North

      Order Journeys North on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Journeys-North-Pacific-Crest-Trail/dp/1680513214/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=Journeys+North&qid=1607558123&sr=8-1 or order a copy signed by the author from his website: http://www.barneyscoutmann.com   No matter your journey or story line, one of the things you will always find is that the supporting characters in your story and on your journey provide the most meaningful spaces of stretching, loving, learning, enjoyment and growth. While Journeys North focuses on a cast of real characters making their way north together on the Pacific Crest trail, the thing that stands out are the moments someone provides a free bed, a warm meal, a hand up, a listening ear. This week see how often you can provide something positive to the people you cross paths with. And have fun on your life journey, wherever it is taking you. Thanks for being here today. Closing reminder - get your copy of LIFE - Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday and start the 21 challenges that will bring possibility, connection - in a time we so badly need it - and self care into your life. It’s available on Amazon. And if you have family or groups you can do the challenges with, it’s even more fun. Live Your Best Life Story on purpose. See you in two weeks.]]>f6fcbc52-70e1-4300-97c7-8227755c1c75Wed, 27 Jan 2021 08:00:00 -070039:18falsefull185185Lori LeeEpisode 184: Accept and Nurture Your AwesomeEpisode 184: Accept and Nurture Your Awesome No matter who you are, or where you came from, you are a beautiful miracle full of talents, ideas, light and potential. There are a lot of messy things in the process of living that can make us feel unworthy, that easily create spaces of not-good-enough. One thing I know for sure is that those stories - those voices are NOT true. No matter who you are. I’ve watched some of the most incredible people on the planet struggle with feelings of not being good enough, as I look on wondering how they could possibly even consider the idea that they weren’t incredible. If you’re one of those who feels unworthy in any way - because you were abused or unloved, because God didn’t answer your prayers, because some broken person or people told you you weren’t good enough, because you were the 7th grader that got shoved in the locker, because you didn’t get straight A’s, because you didn’t get the job, because you are ill and can’t do the things you wish you could do, because you have an addiction you’re fighting, because you have stories in your own mind - your own voice telling you and reinforcing that you are not okay, not enough. It doesn’t matter where the stories come from, there isn’t one of them that is true. Stay tuned today because I’m sharing 4 life coaches to help you let go of things you need to let go of, recognize things you can’t see in yourself, and help propel you forward into your best life story.   The first step IS to accept this idea that you are a beautiful miracle, full of talents, ideas, light and potential.. To hold onto it - even if you can’t believe it right now. There is no one here that isn’t good enough to be here. We were created by God, and that means we are good enough, worthy enough, and incredible. What you do from here - with all you’ve been given, is just the fun part. And yes, the messy part is inevitable, but once we start accepting ourselves fully we’ll also be able to watch how our stories shift. Am I oversimplifying? Not regarding our value, but long held beliefs of unworthiness, of not-enough, are often not shaken easily. Just let the idea sit with you. One minute at a time. Start to make a place for it. If you are one of us that has past wounds that are contributing to that unworthy/not-good-enough feeling, the work before you right now, is to first heal those wounds. As Oprah pointed out, “The healing of our past wounds is one of the most worthwhile challenges of life.” The good news is that it’s no one else’s responsibility to fix it, but our own. This gives us control and power, because we each get to be responsible for our own lives. “Buuuttttt…” you say, “what about when my ex-husband gave me an STD? What about when I lost my job? What about….” Yes, sometimes other people use their agency to cause us pain and difficulty, but we ALWAYS have the choice of what we do with what other people shove at us. We can become bitter and cynical, or we can find learning and keep the joy. As Viktor Frankl said, “Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” Let’s start out this new year on the right foot - with the complete acceptance that we are worthy, fabulous, colorful, and messy and that’s just perfect. But, what do you do if you’re not fully buying into that? If you want a little help in remembering who you are? In today’s episode I’m going to introduce you to 5 different life coaches, and you can see if one of them speaks your language. One of the difficulties I have with choosing my coaches is that I hate to waste money on someone I’m not going to connect with, and it’s always hard to know. Everyone I’m having on the show today I have worked with in one way or another and I can vouch for them. I’ll let you hear a little from them about what they do...]]>Episode 184: Accept and Nurture Your Awesome No matter who you are, or where you came from, you are a beautiful miracle full of talents, ideas, light and potential. There are a lot of messy things in the process of living that can make us feel unworthy, that easily create spaces of not-good-enough. One thing I know for sure is that those stories - those voices are NOT true. No matter who you are. I’ve watched some of the most incredible people on the planet struggle with feelings of not being good enough, as I look on wondering how they could possibly even consider the idea that they weren’t incredible. If you’re one of those who feels unworthy in any way - because you were abused or unloved, because God didn’t answer your prayers, because some broken person or people told you you weren’t good enough, because you were the 7th grader that got shoved in the locker, because you didn’t get straight A’s, because you didn’t get the job, because you are ill and can’t do the things you wish you could do, because you have an addiction you’re fighting, because you have stories in your own mind - your own voice telling you and reinforcing that you are not okay, not enough. It doesn’t matter where the stories come from, there isn’t one of them that is true. Stay tuned today because I’m sharing 4 life coaches to help you let go of things you need to let go of, recognize things you can’t see in yourself, and help propel you forward into your best life story.   The first step IS to accept this idea that you are a beautiful miracle, full of talents, ideas, light and potential.. To hold onto it - even if you can’t believe it right now. There is no one here that isn’t good enough to be here. We were created by God, and that means we are good enough, worthy enough, and incredible. What you do from here - with all you’ve been given, is just the fun part. And yes, the messy part is inevitable, but once we start accepting ourselves fully we’ll also be able to watch how our stories shift. Am I oversimplifying? Not regarding our value, but long held beliefs of unworthiness, of not-enough, are often not shaken easily. Just let the idea sit with you. One minute at a time. Start to make a place for it. If you are one of us that has past wounds that are contributing to that unworthy/not-good-enough feeling, the work before you right now, is to first heal those wounds. As Oprah pointed out, “The healing of our past wounds is one of the most worthwhile challenges of life.” The good news is that it’s no one else’s responsibility to fix it, but our own. This gives us control and power, because we each get to be responsible for our own lives. “Buuuttttt…” you say, “what about when my ex-husband gave me an STD? What about when I lost my job? What about….” Yes, sometimes other people use their agency to cause us pain and difficulty, but we ALWAYS have the choice of what we do with what other people shove at us. We can become bitter and cynical, or we can find learning and keep the joy. As Viktor Frankl said, “Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” Let’s start out this new year on the right foot - with the complete acceptance that we are worthy, fabulous, colorful, and messy and that’s just perfect. But, what do you do if you’re not fully buying into that? If you want a little help in remembering who you are? In today’s episode I’m going to introduce you to 5 different life coaches, and you can see if one of them speaks your language. One of the difficulties I have with choosing my coaches is that I hate to waste money on someone I’m not going to connect with, and it’s always hard to know. Everyone I’m having on the show today I have worked with in one way or another and I can vouch for them. I’ll let you hear a little from them about what they do and you can see if someone strikes your fancy. Listen to the episode to hear each coach discuss their services.

      Contact Information for the coaches:

      Emily Lee Email: zonedincoaching@gmail.com Website: physiologyoffaith.com/coaching Text: 801-920-6191 Lara Johnson E: lara@larajohnsoncoaching.com W: larajohnsoncoaching.com IG: @lara.t.johnson Rebecca Thalman Visionaryreframe.com 435-535-1071 Natalie Kristine Burrage www.natalieburrage.com IG: natalie_burrage YT: https://www.youtube.com/user/lss7773 Email: nkbworldwide@gmail.com   Five Tips

      1. What we focus on expands - focus on the things you love about yourself and living.
      2. Let go of the past. All you have is the present in which to embrace living.
      3. When a negative story about you pops up follow it backward to see where it comes from. Often this is the easiest way to debunk it.
      4. List the things you are grateful for everyday - that gratitude is powerful in changing your energy and what you attract.
      5. When experiences come up that make you face your weak spots, know that this is life giving you a chance to leave the past behind. It’s a chance to bring it front and center and deal with it so you can let it go. Choosing instead to embrace your magic self.

      
        My hope is that you already are aligned with your awesome intrinsic value. But, if you’re feeling like you need support, I hope one of those coaches peaked your interest. And if you’re not considering the support and guidance of a coach, maybe one of the 5 tips struck a cord and you can focus on that this week. Your challenge is to take one small step forward into supporting your awesome self and accepting your own magic. My call to action today is to let you know that GROUPS are the big things for 2021. With Covid keeping so many of us separate we are finding exceptional connection in facilitating a group platform for people who have a group they would like to do the 21 Challenges with. Go to loveyourstorypodcast.com and sign up for more information and I’ll work personally with you to get your group rocking and rolling on a group platform to do the challenges together. We’ll create connection in this disconnected world, better lives that make us happier, and we’ll do it in a supportive and accountable platform that makes the journey all the richer. See you in two weeks for the next episode.]]>b348b408-bf15-491c-8d33-d80d16fbce63Wed, 13 Jan 2021 08:00:00 -070030:36falsefull184184Lori LeeEpisode 183: The Best of 2020The Best of 2020 As 2020 comes to an end, many of us won’t be sad to see it end. Many will be hoping that a new year will be bringing a clean, safe, healthy slate, a hope for better things than we’ve seen. If that wasn’t just the craziest year to-date. We’ve had intense social unrest resulting in riots with serious injuries and massive property damage; we’ve had the circus we call elections, COVID, of course, which meant quarantines, higher than normal death tolls, and life as we know it cancelled. We’ve had fires and earthquakes, mask shaming and job loss. And we can look at it that way, but as in all things, our realities are the stories we tell ourselves about the things going on around us. We also have the choice to focus on the positive things that came from the past year. More time with family, more time in nature, focus on our homes and personal spaces, opportunities abounded. Personally I’ve had my best year ever in real estate. It was a great abundant year. While I missed my usual social calendar it’s been a different and interesting experience to slow down without the same expectation of social interaction - even if that expectation is always just created by me. It was fun to get to say no to things and have an awesome excuse. I’ve enjoyed the things I’ve gotten done on my home and property because of the quarantine. I’ve sent more cards by snail mail to connect, and I’ve said gratitudes every morning and relied on faith rather than fear. I’ve tried to learn from my mistakes - my food storage may not have been all it should have been, but after the pandemic shutdown I was able to improve it. The podcast has continued on inspiring me and others with the wonderful interviews and ideas we share here. As I look back on the 2020 podcast episodes I’ve shared, I notice a theme. The stories that have been shared are illustrations of real people doing really hard things in difficult circumstances, and coming out better and stronger on the other side of that struggle. They are stories to inspire us and show us what it looks like to stand tall when the going gets really rough. If it’s been a tough year for you, fill up on these inspirational stories that show how people make their way through tough things only to come out with massive growth on the other side. That’s a message we’ve needed this year. Stay tuned for the Best of 2020 - the top 5 downloaded episodes.   The thing I love about a “Best Of” episode is that you get little quips - reminders - from the best stories. By listening to this one episode you’ll walk away with brilliant insights from 5 others, and maybe your interest will be peaked enough to go back and listen to the full story from the past episode, so you can get all the insight and brilliance of the vulnerable and triumphant tales each guest has shared. Let’s get started… I love every episode I put together for the show. I don’t ever publish a story or idea that I’m not proud of. So, I could feature every episode this year in the best of - haha, but I’ve decided to pull the top 5 episodes with the most downloads for the year. And, here they are…. Number 5 - In Episode 162: I interviewed Jeff Meyer from The Mental Edge and he talked to us about How to Perform at our Highest Levels. We all do something - are you a parent, a lawyer, an actress, a podcaster, a soccer player? Whatever it is you do, staying in a space of peak performance is the surest way to find success in being your best YOU and creating your best story. This topic was something we could all use this year as we needed and wanted to stay sharp despite working from home, or learning to juggle kids schooling at home. I’m not surprised this one was a hit.   Here’s just a clip of our discussion about how being present is so important to creating real connection and performing at our highest levels as leaders and parents: Tune...]]>The Best of 2020 As 2020 comes to an end, many of us won’t be sad to see it end. Many will be hoping that a new year will be bringing a clean, safe, healthy slate, a hope for better things than we’ve seen. If that wasn’t just the craziest year to-date. We’ve had intense social unrest resulting in riots with serious injuries and massive property damage; we’ve had the circus we call elections, COVID, of course, which meant quarantines, higher than normal death tolls, and life as we know it cancelled. We’ve had fires and earthquakes, mask shaming and job loss. And we can look at it that way, but as in all things, our realities are the stories we tell ourselves about the things going on around us. We also have the choice to focus on the positive things that came from the past year. More time with family, more time in nature, focus on our homes and personal spaces, opportunities abounded. Personally I’ve had my best year ever in real estate. It was a great abundant year. While I missed my usual social calendar it’s been a different and interesting experience to slow down without the same expectation of social interaction - even if that expectation is always just created by me. It was fun to get to say no to things and have an awesome excuse. I’ve enjoyed the things I’ve gotten done on my home and property because of the quarantine. I’ve sent more cards by snail mail to connect, and I’ve said gratitudes every morning and relied on faith rather than fear. I’ve tried to learn from my mistakes - my food storage may not have been all it should have been, but after the pandemic shutdown I was able to improve it. The podcast has continued on inspiring me and others with the wonderful interviews and ideas we share here. As I look back on the 2020 podcast episodes I’ve shared, I notice a theme. The stories that have been shared are illustrations of real people doing really hard things in difficult circumstances, and coming out better and stronger on the other side of that struggle. They are stories to inspire us and show us what it looks like to stand tall when the going gets really rough. If it’s been a tough year for you, fill up on these inspirational stories that show how people make their way through tough things only to come out with massive growth on the other side. That’s a message we’ve needed this year. Stay tuned for the Best of 2020 - the top 5 downloaded episodes.   The thing I love about a “Best Of” episode is that you get little quips - reminders - from the best stories. By listening to this one episode you’ll walk away with brilliant insights from 5 others, and maybe your interest will be peaked enough to go back and listen to the full story from the past episode, so you can get all the insight and brilliance of the vulnerable and triumphant tales each guest has shared. Let’s get started… I love every episode I put together for the show. I don’t ever publish a story or idea that I’m not proud of. So, I could feature every episode this year in the best of - haha, but I’ve decided to pull the top 5 episodes with the most downloads for the year. And, here they are…. Number 5 - In Episode 162: I interviewed Jeff Meyer from The Mental Edge and he talked to us about How to Perform at our Highest Levels. We all do something - are you a parent, a lawyer, an actress, a podcaster, a soccer player? Whatever it is you do, staying in a space of peak performance is the surest way to find success in being your best YOU and creating your best story. This topic was something we could all use this year as we needed and wanted to stay sharp despite working from home, or learning to juggle kids schooling at home. I’m not surprised this one was a hit.   Here’s just a clip of our discussion about how being present is so important to creating real connection and performing at our highest levels as leaders and parents: Tune into the audio recording for that clip. Number 4 - Episode 158 I interviewed Kristen Ulmer and our relationship to fear. Now, Kristen Ulmer is a thought leader on fear and anxiety who draws from her tenure as the most fearless woman extreme skier in the world for 12 years. I think this episode did so well because we are all trying to figure out how to navigate our fears. In 2020 there was a lot of possible fear, so this episode was embraced. Kristen is the author of: The Art of Fear: Why Conquering Fear Won’t Work and What to Do Instead, she’s known for radially challenges existing norms about what to do about fear and anxiety. Here’s a clip from our conversation about how fear needs to be acknowledged in order to he healthy. Tune into the audio program to hear the clip or go to the whole episode to find out what to do instead of locking the “kids” in the basement. Number 3 Episode 157 - Our 2020 New Year’s Episode was titled - What if Nothing Is Wrong with You? I had mixed emotions about this episode being so popular. On the one hand I was thrilled that people were connecting with the show and that I hit a spot people needed to hear - I loved that. On the other I felt sad that so many of us truly think there are things wrong with us - so much so that an episode that shared the new and crazy idea that we might not be broken was something people clamored to. But I have to admit I loved this idea because of the spaces I feel broken in. It is just a universal space we all traverse - learning to fully embrace our beauty. Above all, I hope the ideas helped people accept themselves. What if nothing was wrong with you? How would that settle into your heart? This episode on self love, self acceptance, and the novel idea that we are acceptable here and now, just as we are. In fact we are more than acceptable – we are beloved and filled with magic, was one of the year’s favorites. Tune into the podcast for that clip.   Number 2 Episode164 - I interviewed Tyson Steel about his 23 day Alaskan survival wilderness story in the lowlands south of Denali National Park, in below freezing temperatures after his home burnt to the ground. The fire killed his best friend– a lab who had been with him through thick and thin, and he spent the next 3 weeks alone in the Alaskan wilderness trying to survive. Let’s share again a bit of his story. Tune into the podcast to hear his clip. This interview took place very soon after the tragedy and Tyson had just returned to the states from Alaska. He hadn’t had time to process everything yet and was still in the beginning phases of sorting through what happened. His story is tragic, touching, and unnerving all at once. Update: Tyson has since returned to his homestead to rebuild, and as you listen to the whole episode you’ll learn more about what that homestead is like. Drum Roll….. Our Number 1 most downloaded episode for 2020 was episode 160 - my interview with Jo Marie Taylor and how being held hostage in Kuwait during the Iraqi invasion in 1990 challenged the entire way she thought about life.   I love that this is our number 1 show, because it’s really the number 1 message for 2020. If there was one message that would help and bless us all through that list of things that went wrong in 2020, this message is the one that smooths them all over. We need to accept one another. We need to open our minds and hearts. We need to allow for different ways of thinking and still give personal respect to another’s right to believe as they will. The examples shown in her story - in the full episode - of people risking their lives to help one another, shows the human spirit at it’s most valiant. May we take this beautiful lesson with us into 2021 and let’s see what kind of magic we can make in the coming year. A special thank you to all my loyal listeners and interviewees on the show who make this a place of sharing, learning, and growth. Blessings on all of you. As we close up 2020, I hope you have got your copy - the tool I have provided for all seekers of a more connected live with greater possibility - of LIFE Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday - the 21 Life Connection Challenges. If you haven’t you can get your on Amazon! It will be a great program to start out the new year with! 21 Challenges for creating a life with more connection, more possibility, and more self care. We could all use that. Support the podcast and yourself and get your copy. Have a wonderful holiday and I’ll see you in 2021.]]>697d4585-50a7-48b4-ac26-30474f9d9ef2Wed, 30 Dec 2020 08:00:00 -070036:10falsefull183183Lori LeeEpisode 182: Miracles Abound - Interview Richard Paul EvansEpisode 182:

      Miracles Abound- Interview Richard Paul Evans and Christmas Box International Direcor, Celeste Edmunds

      Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today is our Christmas episode, and since Christmas is a season of love, of miracles, of family, of wintery fun and of treats. Well, I have a treat for you. Today Richard Paul Evans, author of the Christmas Box and 40 consecutive NYT Bestsellers, that always seem to come out around Christmas time, and Celeste Edmunds the Exec. Director of Christmas Box International are here to share a little of all of that - miracles, stories of family and children, gifts and all good things to set the scene for Christmas. On top of that, The Noel Letters, Richard’s new book is out for Christmas and we’re going to hear about that as well, so stay turned. To start, you have to know who these folks are When Richard Paul Evans wrote the #1 best-seller, The Christmas Box, he never intended on becoming an internationally known author. The story was written as an expression of love for his then two young daughters. - It was a Chrsitmas gift he self published and handed out to family and friends. Three years later, this quiet, simple story of parental love and the true meaning of Christmas made history when it became simultaneously the #1 hardcover and paperback book in the nation. Since then, more than eight million copies of The Christmas Box have been printed. Six of Evans’s books have been produced into television movies. There are currently more than 24 million copies of his books in print. As an acclaimed speaker, Evans has shared the podium with such notable personalities as President George W. Bush, President George and Barbara Bush, former British Prime Minister John Majors, Ron Howard, Elizabeth Dole, Deepak Chopra, Steve Allen, and Bob Hope. Evans has been featured on the Today show, Glenn Beck, CNN and Entertainment Tonight, as well as in Time, Newsweek, People, The New York Times, Washington Post, Good Housekeeping, USA Today, TV Guide, Reader’s Digest, and Family Circle - we’re thrilled to have him here on the Love Your Story podcast. Evans has won numerous awards, made the big bucks, and used that money to do really good things in the world. One of which is that during the Spring of 1997, Evans founded The Christmas Box House International, an organization devoted to building shelters and providing services for abused and neglected children. To date, more than 125,000 children have been served by Christmas Box House facilities. That is where Celeste comes in. Celeste is his Executive Director of Christmas Box International. This is kind of fun - almost 2 decades ago Celeste was Richard’s personal assistant. She was at his side fighting the good fight back when Christmas Box International was just a dream. Now, she’s the executive director of this international shelter. She is an exceptional advocate because she was a former foster child herself. It’s a bit like a fairytale. So, with no further ado…. Welcome Richard and Celeste. I want to first start with stories…. Richard - I just finished reading the Miracle of the Christmas Box, which for those of you who don’t know, it is a book that tells the story of all the miracles involved during the journey of the Christmas Box making its way into the world. It’s an inspiring and amazing book just to hear of that journey, and I wanted to read a little excerpt from that book… It’s on page 224 and you have just spoken to a group and someone approaches you… Tune into the audio program to hear the details of that reading, and to hear about Richard's experiences with writing the new book, why Christmas Box International was started, and to hear the tale of a LOT of miracles.  

      NEW BOOK

      "The Noel Letters" is about an editor for a major New...]]>Episode 182:

      Miracles Abound- Interview Richard Paul Evans and Christmas Box International Direcor, Celeste Edmunds

      Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today is our Christmas episode, and since Christmas is a season of love, of miracles, of family, of wintery fun and of treats. Well, I have a treat for you. Today Richard Paul Evans, author of the Christmas Box and 40 consecutive NYT Bestsellers, that always seem to come out around Christmas time, and Celeste Edmunds the Exec. Director of Christmas Box International are here to share a little of all of that - miracles, stories of family and children, gifts and all good things to set the scene for Christmas. On top of that, The Noel Letters, Richard’s new book is out for Christmas and we’re going to hear about that as well, so stay turned. To start, you have to know who these folks are When Richard Paul Evans wrote the #1 best-seller, The Christmas Box, he never intended on becoming an internationally known author. The story was written as an expression of love for his then two young daughters. - It was a Chrsitmas gift he self published and handed out to family and friends. Three years later, this quiet, simple story of parental love and the true meaning of Christmas made history when it became simultaneously the #1 hardcover and paperback book in the nation. Since then, more than eight million copies of The Christmas Box have been printed. Six of Evans’s books have been produced into television movies. There are currently more than 24 million copies of his books in print. As an acclaimed speaker, Evans has shared the podium with such notable personalities as President George W. Bush, President George and Barbara Bush, former British Prime Minister John Majors, Ron Howard, Elizabeth Dole, Deepak Chopra, Steve Allen, and Bob Hope. Evans has been featured on the Today show, Glenn Beck, CNN and Entertainment Tonight, as well as in Time, Newsweek, People, The New York Times, Washington Post, Good Housekeeping, USA Today, TV Guide, Reader’s Digest, and Family Circle - we’re thrilled to have him here on the Love Your Story podcast. Evans has won numerous awards, made the big bucks, and used that money to do really good things in the world. One of which is that during the Spring of 1997, Evans founded The Christmas Box House International, an organization devoted to building shelters and providing services for abused and neglected children. To date, more than 125,000 children have been served by Christmas Box House facilities. That is where Celeste comes in. Celeste is his Executive Director of Christmas Box International. This is kind of fun - almost 2 decades ago Celeste was Richard’s personal assistant. She was at his side fighting the good fight back when Christmas Box International was just a dream. Now, she’s the executive director of this international shelter. She is an exceptional advocate because she was a former foster child herself. It’s a bit like a fairytale. So, with no further ado…. Welcome Richard and Celeste. I want to first start with stories…. Richard - I just finished reading the Miracle of the Christmas Box, which for those of you who don’t know, it is a book that tells the story of all the miracles involved during the journey of the Christmas Box making its way into the world. It’s an inspiring and amazing book just to hear of that journey, and I wanted to read a little excerpt from that book… It’s on page 224 and you have just spoken to a group and someone approaches you… Tune into the audio program to hear the details of that reading, and to hear about Richard's experiences with writing the new book, why Christmas Box International was started, and to hear the tale of a LOT of miracles.  

      NEW BOOK

      "The Noel Letters" is about an editor for a major New York publishing house who returns to her childhood home in Salt Lake City to see her estranged, dying father. What she believed would be a brief visit turns into something more as she inherits the bookstore her father fought to keep alive. Reeling from loneliness, a recent divorce, and unanticipated upheavals in her world, Noel begins receiving letters from an anonymous source, each one containing thoughts and lessons about her life and her future. She begins to reacquaint herself with the bookstore and the people she left behind, and in doing so, starts to unravel the reality of her painful childhood and the truth about her family. As the holidays draw near, she receives a Christmastime revelation that changes not only how she sees the past but also how she views her future.

      To connect with the Christmas Box International on social media:

      IG: thechristmasbox_intl, FB: @TheChristmasBoxInternational You can find Richard's books in all book stores. The story of Richard Paul Evans and the miracles that surrounded his book, the healing, the momentum toward even more miracles with the children being cared for from the Christmas Box International, the Christmas Angels that have been placed around the country where parents go for healing, it’s truly a true story that leaves one in awe…it is a miracle that has created other miracles and the ripple effects go on.   As we move into the last part of the holiday season I encourage you to look for the miracles and the magic in your own life. To notice with gratitude the moments of intuition and serendipity that lead you to beautiful things. I believe in miracles. Today’s show has been a peek at real life miracles. Surround yourself with light, love, healing, and miracles as often as you can, and try to create those for others. That’s what Christmas is all about. The birth of Christ - who is love, who is the doer of miracles. Have a beautiful holiday everyone, and join me in two weeks for the Best of 2020 and the unveiling of the top 5 downloaded Love Your Story shows/episodes for the past year. Don’t forget to get your copy of LIFE - Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday - the 21 Life Connection Challenges. In 2021 I’m starting a new opportunity for groups to sign on and complete the challenges together for added momentum, accountability, and fun. Go to loveyourstorypodcast.com to get more information and to sign up your group. I’ll contact you personally as we get your group - women’s group, youth group, book club, church group, work group, started on the challenges for creating more connection, self-care, and possibility in your life story.]]>194b40fe-245f-410a-a522-9b4deff15d74Wed, 16 Dec 2020 08:00:00 -070044:40falsefull182182Lori LeeEpisode 181 Challenge #7 - Pick ONE Thing for You.Episode 181 Challenge #7

      Pick ONE Thing for You

      Elenor Brown said, “Self care is any action you purposefully take to improve your physical, emotional or spiritual well being.” Today’s episode is part of a series that explores the challenges in the book: LIFE - Living Intentional and Fearless Every day - the 21 LIFE Connection Challenges. THIS is a PERMISSION episode. Today we are on challenge #7 - to pick one thing you’ve been wanting to do or buy for yourself and just do it. I don’t know about you, but I often put off splurging on something I really want because I can’t justify the expense in my own head.  Tune in for today’s quickie episode about how and why this challenge is a beautiful one to embrace. And after you listen, I hope you’ll take the challenge. Because YOU matter.    I was talking with a friend the other day about the nature of the 21 challenges and she begged me to add it into the explanation. So, here it is -  I have a tendency in life to pick and choose what I want to do. I suspect we all probably do. We have to make all kinds of choices everyday where to spend our time. But when I was doing my emotional intelligence training we quickly learned that we did not have that option. It made everyone severely uncomfortable, but we came to understand that if it was part of the program we HAD to do it or leave the program. Boy did we all push through some blocks and every time we learned from it. We found gems of insight and growth that getting OUT of one’s comfort zone brings. Well, that to is the nature of the 21 challenges. If you start the challenges and then just pick the ones that feel comfortable to you, you don’t stretch, you don’t learn, you don’t get out of the program what it holds for you. So, just a reminder - when you start the 21 challenges - commit, in your own head and heart, to push past your resistance and do EVERY challenge.  This series of episodes where I go over the challenges in detail with everyone who is listening, allows you to follow along in doing the challenges, but even better, to understand why the challenges are in the program in the first place. This set of explanatory episodes started in episode 12 and then again in 89  were we who were doing Random Acts of Kindness together, talked about the experiences. These were episodes exploring Challenge # 1 -Do a Random Act of Kindness. In episode 163 I spoke with Ashley Stuart, a de-clutter expert, and we talked about why challenge #2 - to get rid of one thing you no longer need - is so much more important than this simple act seems on the surface. In episode 169 I tackled an in-depth on challenge #3  - this is where we looked at what it really means and looks like to find the lesson in something that doesn’t go your way. Great stuff with expert Leslie Householder on finding the gratitude and lesson in our trials or disappointments. In episode 171 we got into detail about why Challenge #4 - a life hack I call “Success-file” is so important to living happy. Challenge #5  was episode 174 where we got real about giving people the benefit of the doubt and why it’s a relationship saver. And Challenge #6 - the Love Bomb in episode 176.  PLEASE catch up on those episodes if you missed them and take each challenge for yourself. They are included for very important reasons - as you’ll hear as you listen to those episodes.  But today let’s talk about challenge #7. This is the first challenge in the book that directly addresses self-care. The other challenges are about looking outward and doing for others and cleaning up]]>Episode 181 Challenge #7

      Pick ONE Thing for You

      Elenor Brown said, “Self care is any action you purposefully take to improve your physical, emotional or spiritual well being.” Today’s episode is part of a series that explores the challenges in the book: LIFE - Living Intentional and Fearless Every day - the 21 LIFE Connection Challenges. THIS is a PERMISSION episode. Today we are on challenge #7 - to pick one thing you’ve been wanting to do or buy for yourself and just do it. I don’t know about you, but I often put off splurging on something I really want because I can’t justify the expense in my own head.  Tune in for today’s quickie episode about how and why this challenge is a beautiful one to embrace. And after you listen, I hope you’ll take the challenge. Because YOU matter.    I was talking with a friend the other day about the nature of the 21 challenges and she begged me to add it into the explanation. So, here it is -  I have a tendency in life to pick and choose what I want to do. I suspect we all probably do. We have to make all kinds of choices everyday where to spend our time. But when I was doing my emotional intelligence training we quickly learned that we did not have that option. It made everyone severely uncomfortable, but we came to understand that if it was part of the program we HAD to do it or leave the program. Boy did we all push through some blocks and every time we learned from it. We found gems of insight and growth that getting OUT of one’s comfort zone brings. Well, that to is the nature of the 21 challenges. If you start the challenges and then just pick the ones that feel comfortable to you, you don’t stretch, you don’t learn, you don’t get out of the program what it holds for you. So, just a reminder - when you start the 21 challenges - commit, in your own head and heart, to push past your resistance and do EVERY challenge.  This series of episodes where I go over the challenges in detail with everyone who is listening, allows you to follow along in doing the challenges, but even better, to understand why the challenges are in the program in the first place. This set of explanatory episodes started in episode 12 and then again in 89  were we who were doing Random Acts of Kindness together, talked about the experiences. These were episodes exploring Challenge # 1 -Do a Random Act of Kindness. In episode 163 I spoke with Ashley Stuart, a de-clutter expert, and we talked about why challenge #2 - to get rid of one thing you no longer need - is so much more important than this simple act seems on the surface. In episode 169 I tackled an in-depth on challenge #3  - this is where we looked at what it really means and looks like to find the lesson in something that doesn’t go your way. Great stuff with expert Leslie Householder on finding the gratitude and lesson in our trials or disappointments. In episode 171 we got into detail about why Challenge #4 - a life hack I call “Success-file” is so important to living happy. Challenge #5  was episode 174 where we got real about giving people the benefit of the doubt and why it’s a relationship saver. And Challenge #6 - the Love Bomb in episode 176.  PLEASE catch up on those episodes if you missed them and take each challenge for yourself. They are included for very important reasons - as you’ll hear as you listen to those episodes.  But today let’s talk about challenge #7. This is the first challenge in the book that directly addresses self-care. The other challenges are about looking outward and doing for others and cleaning up the spaces we surround ourselves with - these all bless us with connection and clarity and less direct self care, - but THIS challenge is just plain and simply about treating you. Let me finish Eleanor Brown’s quote - that I started in the beginning. “Self-care is any action you purposefully take to improve your physical, emotional or spiritual well being. Too often, we do not make time for sufficient self-care because we’re too busy taking care of others. Life’s demands at home - even more so now during COVID, in our community and at work can take our lives out of balance. Self care can be getting more rest, eating healthier food, spending more time in thoughtful reflection, being kinder to yourself, smiling more, playing or engaging in any activity that renews you. By making time for self-care you prepare yourself to be your best so you can share your gifts with the world. Rest and self-care create a foundation and example of self love that inspires others and allows you to give your best. When you take time to replenish your spirit, it allows you to serve others from the overflow. Self-care isn’t selfish. You cannot serve from an empty vessel.” As I’ve mentioned, this challenge is to pick one thing you’ve really been wanting to enjoy, have, or do, and just do it. I’m giving you permission. Even urging you to do so. What does this look like for you? Is it to get a massage? Take a nap? Buy a dress? Splurge on a membership to the gym or country club? Treat yourself to a pedicure or a movie. Maybe you order out instead of making dinner and then hit a bubble bath. What about a hike to realign your spirit in a natural space?  Or maybe it’s 20 minutes for meditating. What have you been wanting or needing? This is personal… Let’s talk about why for a moment. Deepak Chopra, a spiritual and physical physician and head of the Chopra Center, shared in his 21-Day Abundance mediation series, the answer in very simple terms…. “When you believe you are valuable you surround yourself with luxury, comfort and pleasures beyond those needed for everyday living. Luxury is not materialism. It doesn’t have to be an expensive car or opulent home. It can simply be the sweet fragrance of flowers picked from a garden, a drop of scented oil dropped in a warm bath, a piece of rich chocolate, or the sound of beautiful music. These are live’s small luxuries that cost very little but mean so much. Do you feel worthy of such luxury? Luxury is our natural state and abundance our birthright…by elevating your view of yourself you elevate the quality of your life. Your outer world will echo your thoughts beliefs and intentions that you are a treasured being. Take some time today to do something for yourself that you consider luxurious… make this a habit, the more you bring small luxuries into your life the more you will recognize yourself as a worthy spiritual being, deserving of love and abundance.” I love the wisdom of Deepak Chopra and I’ve always been a fan of surrounding myself with lots of things that feel luxurious - little things as he mentioned, that I love, fresh flowers, yummy candles, massage, pedicures, chai tea, sushi…thinks that make me happy in small doses.  Sometimes we get too busy to focus on us. Sometimes we put off something we’d love for others. Sometimes, it just gets lost because it’s not our habit to set aside time or a little money or special attention for a joyful moment. Challenge 7 is the reminder. When you are doing the challenges you don’t get to pick and choose, you just do them. That’s part of the growth cycle. And this one is laced with fun. Feedback I’ve received from those doing the challenge has been riddled with excitement on this particular challenge. A sigh of relieve in some cases. A push to do that thing for yourself that is waiting to give you a break, a joyful moment, a pat on the back.  One man explained to me how on Challenge 7 day, when others tried loading him with things to do, he simply told them, “No, today is my day. And he went and got a haircut and bought himself a few favorite treats and enjoyed some alone time.  Another woman signed herself up for a workshop she had been wanting to attend. She was totally giddy about the investment in herself. Another gal booked a day at the spa. What would your fun self-care wish be? I got on FaceBook last month and asked people what kind of things they did for self care. Here’s a short list: facials, hike, surf, mountain bike, ski, read, outside projects in the yard, shower, brownies and coke, cuddles, Zumba, hot yoga, mediation, gardening, play the piano, workout, do puzzles, take walks and look at the sunset.  Do those spark any ideas for you? What do YOU do for self care? And, if you can’t quickly answer with a few go-to things, this challenge is even more important for you. I’d like to share a TedX talk with you called “Self Care - what it really is.”  Susanna Joy Winters suggests 3 restorative activities that focus on self care in a way that is simple, natural, and all about emotional and mental self care. See what you think of her ideas - she’s got some fabulous points about how self care - slowing down and sitting in stillness as a way of self-care, also helps us control the stories in our heads. Tune into the audio program to hear this section of the show. Whether your self-care is treating yourself to something you’ve been meaning to buy - showing yourself you’re worth spending the dough on. Or it centers on emotional and mental self care through stillness and moments with nature - a little “earthing”. Or your best self-care may be moving and feeling your body - getting the endorphins to get you a dose of happy and get the blood pumping, it’s definitely worth doing over and over. You start with one stretch - this challenge, the self splurge,  but once you see how good it feels, I hope you’ll schedule in some self love on a regular basis. Thanks for being here today for this quick talk about loving on ourselves. Your challenge this week is to take Challenge #7 and do something just for you. You have permission - I insist. Get your own copy of the 21 Life Connection Challenges on Amazon  (search the word LIFE and Lori Lee) or you can find the link on loveyourstorypodcast.com. Give it as a gift to the people you love and do the challenges together. It’s a way to build good energy and connection in this time of social and political distancing and upheaval. Take action to make your story just what you want it to be. See you in two weeks for the next episode ]]>a908b8ac-a080-4c7e-b40e-a3f03b46eef0Wed, 02 Dec 2020 08:00:00 -070019:54falsefull181181Lori LeeEpisode 180: Hearts of the Fathers - Interview Sheldon LawrenceEpisode 180: Hearts of the Fathers - Interview Sheldon Lawrence

      Fleeing from a deadly head-on collision, a man descends into a hellish realm to hide from Heaven’s beconing light. God can rescue him from the darkness, but escaping Hell is only the beginning. The greatest test comes as he confronts his broken relationships and sees himself and others in truth. Tune in for this week’s episode of the LYS podcast and Week 2 of story time. It’s the season of gratitude and holiday prep. To aid in your holiday prep I am sharing with you, in each November episode, a book I think shares an important message - and maybe will make your gift giving experience easier and more fun.  Last week was Six and Spider Jungle, a kid’s book about accepting everyone with all their wonderful differences, and this week we get a little more serious as the author of Hearts of the Fathers, Sheldon Lawrence, joins me for a preview of his book. Stay tuned and see if you get what so many have gotten out of this book….a changed desire to really live and a greater trust in God’s love.   Inspired by the research of hundreds of near-death experiences, this book has transformed the way I view potential spiritual growth in a universe grounded in God’s love. Sheldon has put into fictional form - often the funnest form of reading - a possible look at what life after death might entail. The first time I ready this book I loved it because it aligned with my strong, personal belief that we will continue to grow and learn and progress after this life. It also really illustrated how the energy - good or bad - that we create here and now, travels with us as we leave this world. I’m excited to share this book with you because it’s going to give you some serious food for thought. Sheldon Lawrence teaches writing at BYU-Idaho. His award winning personal essays have appeared in various journals and magazines. He earned a PhD in English at Idaho State University where he specialize in the study of spiritual autobiography. He lives with his wife and 4 children in Rexburg, ID. He is the author of the spiritual novel, Hearts of the Fathers and today he is here to talk to us about it.  Tune into the audio program to hear the interview with Sheldon. Get a copy of the book on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Hearts-Fathers-story-Heaven-after-ebook/dp/B01IYJMR7W/ref=sr_1_3?dchild=1&keywords=Hearts+of+the+Fathers&qid=1601482891&sr=8-3 As we wrap up November I’ve given you 3 great ideas for holiday gift books: Of course there is the 21-Day Challenges in the book LIFE - Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday. I recommend getting that for everyone you love and then doing the challenges together as a way to build and bond with family and friends. It’s available on Amazon. https://www.amazon.com/L-I-F-Intentional-Fearless-Connection-Challenges/dp/1793127328 There is Six and Spider Jungle by Jef Olsen that we previewed in last week’s episode - a wonderful story for the children on your list - and he’ll send you a free download link if you email him. Get his email in the show notes on loveyourstorypodcast.com And today’s book - Hearts of the Fathers. Something for everyone! Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours. May you create a Thanksgiving story full of magic and happy moments. Remember to count your blessings everyday. It’s the key to abundant living. See you in a couple weeks on the next episode of the LYS podcast.Episode 180: Hearts of the Fathers - Interview Sheldon Lawrence

      Fleeing from a deadly head-on collision, a man descends into a hellish realm to hide from Heaven’s beconing light. God can rescue him from the darkness, but escaping Hell is only the beginning. The greatest test comes as he confronts his broken relationships and sees himself and others in truth. Tune in for this week’s episode of the LYS podcast and Week 2 of story time. It’s the season of gratitude and holiday prep. To aid in your holiday prep I am sharing with you, in each November episode, a book I think shares an important message - and maybe will make your gift giving experience easier and more fun.  Last week was Six and Spider Jungle, a kid’s book about accepting everyone with all their wonderful differences, and this week we get a little more serious as the author of Hearts of the Fathers, Sheldon Lawrence, joins me for a preview of his book. Stay tuned and see if you get what so many have gotten out of this book….a changed desire to really live and a greater trust in God’s love.   Inspired by the research of hundreds of near-death experiences, this book has transformed the way I view potential spiritual growth in a universe grounded in God’s love. Sheldon has put into fictional form - often the funnest form of reading - a possible look at what life after death might entail. The first time I ready this book I loved it because it aligned with my strong, personal belief that we will continue to grow and learn and progress after this life. It also really illustrated how the energy - good or bad - that we create here and now, travels with us as we leave this world. I’m excited to share this book with you because it’s going to give you some serious food for thought. Sheldon Lawrence teaches writing at BYU-Idaho. His award winning personal essays have appeared in various journals and magazines. He earned a PhD in English at Idaho State University where he specialize in the study of spiritual autobiography. He lives with his wife and 4 children in Rexburg, ID. He is the author of the spiritual novel, Hearts of the Fathers and today he is here to talk to us about it.  Tune into the audio program to hear the interview with Sheldon. Get a copy of the book on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Hearts-Fathers-story-Heaven-after-ebook/dp/B01IYJMR7W/ref=sr_1_3?dchild=1&keywords=Hearts+of+the+Fathers&qid=1601482891&sr=8-3 As we wrap up November I’ve given you 3 great ideas for holiday gift books: Of course there is the 21-Day Challenges in the book LIFE - Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday. I recommend getting that for everyone you love and then doing the challenges together as a way to build and bond with family and friends. It’s available on Amazon. https://www.amazon.com/L-I-F-Intentional-Fearless-Connection-Challenges/dp/1793127328 There is Six and Spider Jungle by Jef Olsen that we previewed in last week’s episode - a wonderful story for the children on your list - and he’ll send you a free download link if you email him. Get his email in the show notes on loveyourstorypodcast.com And today’s book - Hearts of the Fathers. Something for everyone! Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours. May you create a Thanksgiving story full of magic and happy moments. Remember to count your blessings everyday. It’s the key to abundant living. See you in a couple weeks on the next episode of the LYS podcast. ]]>66fd1c43-005b-41be-8190-0705dac811ceWed, 18 Nov 2020 08:00:00 -070036:04falsefull180180Lori LeeEpisode 179: Six in Spider Jungle - Interview Jef OlsenEpisode 179: Six in Spider Jungle - Interview Jef Olsen

       

      It’s November and we are all starting to look for ideas for holiday gifts. Well, my two November episodes are going to provide you with some wonderful story gift ideas. Each episode will be a discussion with an author about a story book that may be just the thing you need. You’ll have to listen in and see, each week will be a very different type of book. 

      This week I’ll start out with a quote from Maya Angelou, she said, “If you are always trying to be normal, you will never know how amazing you can be.”

      Maya’s words of wisdom starts out this episode perfectly, because today you get to hear a story about a spider named Rex who had 6 legs instead of 8. Read by the author Jef Olsen, this new book is a reminder that being yourself puts something wonderful into the world that wasn’t there before.

       

      Tune into the audio program for a little story time, and a way to get a free digital copy for yourself or someone on your gift list.

       

      Jef Olsen (that’s with 1 f) is an introvert who is occasionally happy to attend a gathering. He says he lived a very happy and stress free youth because when something was too difficult, he simply did not do it. He avoided the hard stuff. A lover of history, be got a BA in History from the University of Utah, then realized he needed money to pay the bills, so he went to law school. Currently he works as the senior in-house legal counsel for a vehicle service contract company, is married to a super human wife, and is the father of 6 children that he travels the world with. He’s a fan of Marvel comics, Star Wars and the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

      Jef wrote this book, but he feels like he wrote it down as the ideas came to him, rather than made it up. Rex the spider is named after his first best friend. Jef says, “I like the idea of acceptance and appreciation. It costs nothing to be kind.” This book for me was simply that people are different and that we should look at acceptance instead of rejection of others that seem or look different.

      I was thinking that an illustrated copy of this book might make a great Christmas gift. We’ll hope that Jef and Kate have copies ready for the holidays. You can reach him at his email to check up on that. 

       

      Jef Olsen: jef_olsen@hotmail.com

       

      Angelina Jolie shared a peak into her childhood, “I want to say when I was little, like Maleficent, I was told I was different. And I felt out of place and too loud, too full of fire, never good at sitting still, never good at fitting in. And then one day I realized something – something I hope you all realize. Different is good. When someone tells you that you are different, smile and hold your head up and be proud.”

      The best stories are created with interesting characters. Be who you are, and be good at it. Love your own colors and share them. To love your story, you cannot dislike your main character - YOU. 

      As we sign off today I want to ask you to hop on iTunes and leave a review for the podcast. If you’ll do this, then email me your address and I’ll send you a Love Your Story podcast sticker. Thanks for being all the wonderful that you are. I’ll see you in two weeks on the next episode. 

      ]]>Episode 179: Six in Spider Jungle - Interview Jef Olsen

       

      It’s November and we are all starting to look for ideas for holiday gifts. Well, my two November episodes are going to provide you with some wonderful story gift ideas. Each episode will be a discussion with an author about a story book that may be just the thing you need. You’ll have to listen in and see, each week will be a very different type of book. 

      This week I’ll start out with a quote from Maya Angelou, she said, “If you are always trying to be normal, you will never know how amazing you can be.”

      Maya’s words of wisdom starts out this episode perfectly, because today you get to hear a story about a spider named Rex who had 6 legs instead of 8. Read by the author Jef Olsen, this new book is a reminder that being yourself puts something wonderful into the world that wasn’t there before.

       

      Tune into the audio program for a little story time, and a way to get a free digital copy for yourself or someone on your gift list.

       

      Jef Olsen (that’s with 1 f) is an introvert who is occasionally happy to attend a gathering. He says he lived a very happy and stress free youth because when something was too difficult, he simply did not do it. He avoided the hard stuff. A lover of history, be got a BA in History from the University of Utah, then realized he needed money to pay the bills, so he went to law school. Currently he works as the senior in-house legal counsel for a vehicle service contract company, is married to a super human wife, and is the father of 6 children that he travels the world with. He’s a fan of Marvel comics, Star Wars and the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

      Jef wrote this book, but he feels like he wrote it down as the ideas came to him, rather than made it up. Rex the spider is named after his first best friend. Jef says, “I like the idea of acceptance and appreciation. It costs nothing to be kind.” This book for me was simply that people are different and that we should look at acceptance instead of rejection of others that seem or look different.

      I was thinking that an illustrated copy of this book might make a great Christmas gift. We’ll hope that Jef and Kate have copies ready for the holidays. You can reach him at his email to check up on that. 

       

      Jef Olsen: jef_olsen@hotmail.com

       

      Angelina Jolie shared a peak into her childhood, “I want to say when I was little, like Maleficent, I was told I was different. And I felt out of place and too loud, too full of fire, never good at sitting still, never good at fitting in. And then one day I realized something – something I hope you all realize. Different is good. When someone tells you that you are different, smile and hold your head up and be proud.”

      The best stories are created with interesting characters. Be who you are, and be good at it. Love your own colors and share them. To love your story, you cannot dislike your main character - YOU. 

      As we sign off today I want to ask you to hop on iTunes and leave a review for the podcast. If you’ll do this, then email me your address and I’ll send you a Love Your Story podcast sticker. Thanks for being all the wonderful that you are. I’ll see you in two weeks on the next episode. 

      ]]>631b4166-ee5a-4f68-8910-8ba426df2a0aWed, 04 Nov 2020 08:00:00 -070027:53falsefull179179Lori LeeGhost Story Call-InEpisode 178: Ghost Stories

      Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast, it’s our Halloween 2020 episode. 

      Have you ever seen a ghost? Experienced energy from the unseen? Felt something you couldn’t see or had doors slam for no reason?

      The world is full of ghost stories. For Halloween I opened up the phone lines to have people call in and share their own ghost stories. Stay tuned for the call ins and get a little ghost story thrill to prepare you for Halloween….

      I’ll start our spooky episode with this quote from George Q. Cannon - 

      "There are places....where the influence or the presence of invisible spirits are very perceptibly felt...and that...evil influences or spirits...affect (us)..... I have come to the conclusion that if our eyes were open to see the spirit world around us, we should feel differently on the subject than we do; we would not be so unguarded and careless and so indifferent whether we had the spirit and power of God with us or not; but we would be continually watchful and prayerful to our Heavenly Father for his Holy Spirit and his holy angels to be around us....

      With that warning in mind, let’s listen to the call ins:

      Listen to the audio to hear the call-in ghost stories.

      
      

      Our time is already up, but those stories should get the holiday “spirit” flowing. I’ll be honest, I’m a little more freaked out than I was before I heard the stories, but all I can say is, “May the Halloween spirit be with you and may it be a friendly one.”

      Join us in a few weeks for our November episodes which will highlight some great story gift ideas for the upcoming gift-giving season.

      Our first November episode will be a discussion with the author of Six and Spider Jungle, for the younger kids on your list ,and a lesson in how our differences make us stronger. You’ll also get a free download, so listen in.

      See you in two weeks, and Happy Halloween.

      ]]>Episode 178: Ghost Stories

      Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast, it’s our Halloween 2020 episode. 

      Have you ever seen a ghost? Experienced energy from the unseen? Felt something you couldn’t see or had doors slam for no reason?

      The world is full of ghost stories. For Halloween I opened up the phone lines to have people call in and share their own ghost stories. Stay tuned for the call ins and get a little ghost story thrill to prepare you for Halloween….

      I’ll start our spooky episode with this quote from George Q. Cannon - 

      "There are places....where the influence or the presence of invisible spirits are very perceptibly felt...and that...evil influences or spirits...affect (us)..... I have come to the conclusion that if our eyes were open to see the spirit world around us, we should feel differently on the subject than we do; we would not be so unguarded and careless and so indifferent whether we had the spirit and power of God with us or not; but we would be continually watchful and prayerful to our Heavenly Father for his Holy Spirit and his holy angels to be around us....

      With that warning in mind, let’s listen to the call ins:

      Listen to the audio to hear the call-in ghost stories.

      
      

      Our time is already up, but those stories should get the holiday “spirit” flowing. I’ll be honest, I’m a little more freaked out than I was before I heard the stories, but all I can say is, “May the Halloween spirit be with you and may it be a friendly one.”

      Join us in a few weeks for our November episodes which will highlight some great story gift ideas for the upcoming gift-giving season.

      Our first November episode will be a discussion with the author of Six and Spider Jungle, for the younger kids on your list ,and a lesson in how our differences make us stronger. You’ll also get a free download, so listen in.

      See you in two weeks, and Happy Halloween.

      ]]>cfe93c45-4d60-43ee-bfeb-83a95bbbf72fWed, 21 Oct 2020 08:00:00 -070034:04falsefull178178Lori LeeEpisode 177: Dealing with Anger - Interview Lara JohnsonEpisode 177: Dealing with Anger - Interview Lara Johnson

      Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast. Today we are talking about ANGER and how to deal with it. Anger, like all the “negative” emotions we feel, is often something we feel like we have to suppress in order to be a “good” person. But what happens when we suppress our feelings rather than allow and experience them? I’m not advocating for zero self-control, rather I want to explore with you a real life story that can show us what suppressed anger can do to us and how acceptance and allowance of our emotions helps us heal.

      Today my guest is Lara Johnson. After being molested as a child Lara was angry. Anger became her constant companion, but also her shackles. Giving herself permission to BE angry changed her life and allowed her to move on once and for all.

      Stay tuned to hear her story and to talk to this now certified life coach as she helps us with tips and understanding for dealing with our own emotions.

      Tune in to the audio program to hear Lara's interview.

      Thick That Hang said, in The Heart of the Buddhas’s teaching: Transforming Suffering into Peace, Joy and Liberation, “Letting go gives us freedom, and freedom is the only condition for happiness. If, in our heart, we still cling to anything - anger, anxiety, or possessions - we cannot be free.” 

      and, Mark Twain said, 

      “Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.” 

      All our emotions, the ones we label “good” and “bad,” are perhaps all here to teach us love. In this case the idea of self-love being key - giving ourselves permission to feel what we feel and love ourselves through those emotions we label as “negative” or “bad.” When the key to healing is allowing space for us to feel our way through the experience without judgement of ourselves, we can move more smoothly forward through our lives. We propel ourselves forward through the experiences that feel like road blocks. So much easier said than done, especially because this allowing may be in direct conflict with how you’ve been trained - not to allow a place for “bad” emotions. But today’s discussion is a beam of light on how we make it through with love and grace.

      Your challenge this week is to choose a powerful emotion you are feeling - something WILL come up this week, and instead of fighting it off or feeling bad for feeling it, practice sitting with it and just letting it be with you for a bit, without judgement. Ask it how long it needs to stay and notice what it may be protecting you from. Some of these insights will give you the clarity to accept with love.

      Thanks for being here today. Don’t forget you can get your copy of LIFE - Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday - the 21 LIFE connection challenges on Amazon - start the 21 Challenges to create more self-care, more connection and more possibility in your own life or give it as a gift and help someone else create these wonderful things in their life.

      Would sure appreciate a review of the podcast, on whatever platform you listen. Those reviews help me know my work with stories is reaching and helping.

      Have a great week creating your best life story.

      ]]>Episode 177: Dealing with Anger - Interview Lara Johnson

      Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast. Today we are talking about ANGER and how to deal with it. Anger, like all the “negative” emotions we feel, is often something we feel like we have to suppress in order to be a “good” person. But what happens when we suppress our feelings rather than allow and experience them? I’m not advocating for zero self-control, rather I want to explore with you a real life story that can show us what suppressed anger can do to us and how acceptance and allowance of our emotions helps us heal.

      Today my guest is Lara Johnson. After being molested as a child Lara was angry. Anger became her constant companion, but also her shackles. Giving herself permission to BE angry changed her life and allowed her to move on once and for all.

      Stay tuned to hear her story and to talk to this now certified life coach as she helps us with tips and understanding for dealing with our own emotions.

      Tune in to the audio program to hear Lara's interview.

      Thick That Hang said, in The Heart of the Buddhas’s teaching: Transforming Suffering into Peace, Joy and Liberation, “Letting go gives us freedom, and freedom is the only condition for happiness. If, in our heart, we still cling to anything - anger, anxiety, or possessions - we cannot be free.” 

      and, Mark Twain said, 

      “Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.” 

      All our emotions, the ones we label “good” and “bad,” are perhaps all here to teach us love. In this case the idea of self-love being key - giving ourselves permission to feel what we feel and love ourselves through those emotions we label as “negative” or “bad.” When the key to healing is allowing space for us to feel our way through the experience without judgement of ourselves, we can move more smoothly forward through our lives. We propel ourselves forward through the experiences that feel like road blocks. So much easier said than done, especially because this allowing may be in direct conflict with how you’ve been trained - not to allow a place for “bad” emotions. But today’s discussion is a beam of light on how we make it through with love and grace.

      Your challenge this week is to choose a powerful emotion you are feeling - something WILL come up this week, and instead of fighting it off or feeling bad for feeling it, practice sitting with it and just letting it be with you for a bit, without judgement. Ask it how long it needs to stay and notice what it may be protecting you from. Some of these insights will give you the clarity to accept with love.

      Thanks for being here today. Don’t forget you can get your copy of LIFE - Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday - the 21 LIFE connection challenges on Amazon - start the 21 Challenges to create more self-care, more connection and more possibility in your own life or give it as a gift and help someone else create these wonderful things in their life.

      Would sure appreciate a review of the podcast, on whatever platform you listen. Those reviews help me know my work with stories is reaching and helping.

      Have a great week creating your best life story.

      ]]>89019c8b-0c44-4077-b3ba-df88c54c02e8Wed, 07 Oct 2020 08:00:00 -070032:02falsefull177177Lori LeeEpisode 176: Challenge #6 - The Love Bomb
      

      ]]>
      

      ]]>52f3f3d9-8ac6-4e71-b039-ed4732697141Wed, 23 Sep 2020 08:00:00 -070017:09falsefull176176Lori Lee7 Tips from 7 InfluencersEpisode 175: 7 Tips from 7 Influencers

      Near the end of 2019 a group of influencers met for lunch. Their purpose was for each to come to understand better the good that the others were trying to do in the world and to see how they might support each another and help each other along their individual paths. At the end of that 4-hour lunch and cram session I asked each to share with me/my audience one piece of advice that they felt, from their experience, was most important - the piece of advice they wanted to leave for the world, and we proceeded to think, laugh, and share our way around the circle.

      Stay tuned for these 7 tips on living well, from 7 people who aren’t just thinking about making a mark on the world, but are actually doing it.

       

      In Oprah’s book, What I Know for Sure,  she says, “I live in the space of thankfulness - and for that, I have been rewarded a million times over. I started out giving thanks for small things, and the more thankful I became, the more my bounty increased, That’s because—for sure — what you focus on expands. When you focus on the goodness in your life, you create more of it.”

      I want to start out this episode acknowledging a gratefulness for these wonderful people and all the other wonderful people in the world trying to create good, do good, and make the world better, just because they can. THANK YOU.

      I also think that my advice, if I toss mine into this pot, involves this very topic. To create your best life story is to stay grateful. Gratitude reminds you you are supported by something bigger than yourself. Gratitude releases chemicals that make you happy, Gratitude helps you focus on the good in your life, and that brings more goodness and magic, and greater abundance. Gratitude is the key living well, in so many ways. Gratitude is a foundational tool to creating a life story that feels like it’s full of magic.

      Now here’s 7 more tips….Listen in to our conversation and excuse the background sounds of doorbells, background laughing and the occasional door closing.

       

      Jennifer Anderson - Listen and Act on Inspiration - just take the first step.

      Rachel Reist - Be present. Be here now, not longing for something past or future. 

      Ashley Stuart- Reassess and reverse your relationship with stuff. Connect with your life style and your people and the way you want to live and then proactively bring in only what you need.

      Andy Proctor. - The happiness guru - I you feel like your stuck ask yourself if you’re trying to live a past dream that no longer serves you.

      Lindsay Kjar - Mixed Faith Marriage Coaching: Meet your own needs. Know what your desires, hope and dreams are and then figuring out how you can meet those needs on your own so you aren’t waiting for someone else to create your happiness.

      Mel Miller - Know that all the pieces/things you need in your life will show up. If you need to make something happen there IS a person in your life that can help you do what you need to do. Just show up with your vision and things will appear.

      Rachel Von neiderhausern - Remember the power of 1. Each small act/choice to help others will ripple out. 

      Thanks for tuning in this week. This week’s challenge is to choose the piece of advise that really stood out to you, and consider how you are living it in your life. I know at least one of these suggestions probably grabbed your attention and made your mind wander into your own thoughts. Grab that piece and take two steps - 1. Think on it and why it caught your attention. 2. Act on it. What doe your gut tell you you need to do with that piece of advice.

      A couple announcements - in 2020 I started a new section of Love Your Story called Tell Your Story. If you are interested in collecting your story in audio format for posterity, or if you have a family member or friend that you would like privately...]]>Episode 175: 7 Tips from 7 Influencers

      Near the end of 2019 a group of influencers met for lunch. Their purpose was for each to come to understand better the good that the others were trying to do in the world and to see how they might support each another and help each other along their individual paths. At the end of that 4-hour lunch and cram session I asked each to share with me/my audience one piece of advice that they felt, from their experience, was most important - the piece of advice they wanted to leave for the world, and we proceeded to think, laugh, and share our way around the circle.

      Stay tuned for these 7 tips on living well, from 7 people who aren’t just thinking about making a mark on the world, but are actually doing it.

       

      In Oprah’s book, What I Know for Sure,  she says, “I live in the space of thankfulness - and for that, I have been rewarded a million times over. I started out giving thanks for small things, and the more thankful I became, the more my bounty increased, That’s because—for sure — what you focus on expands. When you focus on the goodness in your life, you create more of it.”

      I want to start out this episode acknowledging a gratefulness for these wonderful people and all the other wonderful people in the world trying to create good, do good, and make the world better, just because they can. THANK YOU.

      I also think that my advice, if I toss mine into this pot, involves this very topic. To create your best life story is to stay grateful. Gratitude reminds you you are supported by something bigger than yourself. Gratitude releases chemicals that make you happy, Gratitude helps you focus on the good in your life, and that brings more goodness and magic, and greater abundance. Gratitude is the key living well, in so many ways. Gratitude is a foundational tool to creating a life story that feels like it’s full of magic.

      Now here’s 7 more tips….Listen in to our conversation and excuse the background sounds of doorbells, background laughing and the occasional door closing.

       

      Jennifer Anderson - Listen and Act on Inspiration - just take the first step.

      Rachel Reist - Be present. Be here now, not longing for something past or future. 

      Ashley Stuart- Reassess and reverse your relationship with stuff. Connect with your life style and your people and the way you want to live and then proactively bring in only what you need.

      Andy Proctor. - The happiness guru - I you feel like your stuck ask yourself if you’re trying to live a past dream that no longer serves you.

      Lindsay Kjar - Mixed Faith Marriage Coaching: Meet your own needs. Know what your desires, hope and dreams are and then figuring out how you can meet those needs on your own so you aren’t waiting for someone else to create your happiness.

      Mel Miller - Know that all the pieces/things you need in your life will show up. If you need to make something happen there IS a person in your life that can help you do what you need to do. Just show up with your vision and things will appear.

      Rachel Von neiderhausern - Remember the power of 1. Each small act/choice to help others will ripple out. 

      Thanks for tuning in this week. This week’s challenge is to choose the piece of advise that really stood out to you, and consider how you are living it in your life. I know at least one of these suggestions probably grabbed your attention and made your mind wander into your own thoughts. Grab that piece and take two steps - 1. Think on it and why it caught your attention. 2. Act on it. What doe your gut tell you you need to do with that piece of advice.

      A couple announcements - in 2020 I started a new section of Love Your Story called Tell Your Story. If you are interested in collecting your story in audio format for posterity, or if you have a family member or friend that you would like privately interviewed to collect their story, contact me at lorijlee@msn.com with Tell Your Story in the subject line. For more information on it you can go to loveyourstorypodcast.com and click on tools and Tell Your Story. You can also still get links to get your copy of LIFE Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday - the 21 Life Connection Challenges.

      Share the love people! Have a wonderful week. 

       

      ]]>48e02571-d0a9-45dc-b263-c808eb2345edThu, 10 Sep 2020 09:00:00 -070019:07falsefull175175Lori LeeEpisode 174: Challenge #5 - Giving the Benefit of the DoubtEpisode 174: Challenge #5 - Giving the Benefit of the Doubt

      Welcome Listeners to the Love Your Story podcast. Today’s episode is a part of a series where I am going into more detail on each of the challenges in my book - LIFE  - which stands for: Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday, the 21 Life Connection Challenges - today is all about Challenge #5 - Give someone the benefit of the doubt.

      Just a quick recap - 

      In episode 12 and 89 I went into some wonderful detail about the process of doing Random Acts of Kindness, which is Challenge # 1 in the 21 Life Connection Challenges.

      In episode 163 I went into detail with Ashley Stuart, a de-clutter expert, and we talked about why challenge #2 - to get rid of 1 thing you no longer need - is so much more important than this simple act seems on the surface. 

      In episode 169 I tackled an in-depth on challenge #3 where we looked at what it really means and looks like to find the lesson in something that doesn’t go your way. Again, great stuff with expert Leslie Householder on finding the gratitude and lesson in our trials or disappointments.

      In episode episode 171 we got into detail about why Challenge #4 - a life hack I call “Success-file” is so important to living happy.

      And today we are on Challenge #5 - which is - Giving people the benefit of the doubt and how that becomes relationship changing.

       

      The recaps of these challenges is about getting into more detail about why the challenge was included in the book, to hear what experts have to say about the topic, and to see what it looks like in real life.

      These 21 Challenges are not just a random bunch of challenges I threw together. They have been chosen for specific reasons, and the shifts they cause in every day lives just by using them. That’s what these episodes are about - is delving into why each challenge is important.

      So let’s talk about the challenge of giving someone the benefit of the doubt. —challenge #5.

      Giving someone the benefit of the doubt may be easier than it sounds. But first let’s talk about what it is:

      The Urban Dictionary says, To give someone the benefit of the doubt is to default to the belief that their intentions are honest, and not assume malice when there is uncertainty or doubt surrounding the circumstances.

      Or, in other words, to believe something good about someone, rather than something bad, when you have the possibility of doing either. 

      The reason this challenge is included is because this small decision will make a huge difference in your relationships, and the challenges are to help you create connection in your life.

      Benefit of the doubt example:

      John didn't pay me back the $20 he owes me, but I'll give him the benefit of the doubt that he simply forgot and isn't trying to rip me off.

      Jill is late, but there must be a good reason and it’s not just because she doesn’t respect my time.

      My spouse hasn’t done what they agreed to do, but before getting upset I’ll talk to them about it - something probably got in the way.

      Let’s talk about doing it ….giving the benefit of the doubt?

      When someone does or says something that irritates you, feels unfair, or feels like a betrayal, giving the benefit of the doubt means that you consciously change the way you are interpreting the situation and the story you are building around it, and instead find a way to give that person the benefit of the doubt that they did not mean offense, that they are doing the best they can, that there is part of the story you don’t understand, or consider that there may be a misunderstanding.

      People rub up against each other (metaphorically speaking) all the time; it’s what we do. There are rubs and irritants, and miscommunications every day. But if everyone gave each other...]]>Episode 174: Challenge #5 - Giving the Benefit of the Doubt

      Welcome Listeners to the Love Your Story podcast. Today’s episode is a part of a series where I am going into more detail on each of the challenges in my book - LIFE  - which stands for: Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday, the 21 Life Connection Challenges - today is all about Challenge #5 - Give someone the benefit of the doubt.

      Just a quick recap - 

      In episode 12 and 89 I went into some wonderful detail about the process of doing Random Acts of Kindness, which is Challenge # 1 in the 21 Life Connection Challenges.

      In episode 163 I went into detail with Ashley Stuart, a de-clutter expert, and we talked about why challenge #2 - to get rid of 1 thing you no longer need - is so much more important than this simple act seems on the surface. 

      In episode 169 I tackled an in-depth on challenge #3 where we looked at what it really means and looks like to find the lesson in something that doesn’t go your way. Again, great stuff with expert Leslie Householder on finding the gratitude and lesson in our trials or disappointments.

      In episode episode 171 we got into detail about why Challenge #4 - a life hack I call “Success-file” is so important to living happy.

      And today we are on Challenge #5 - which is - Giving people the benefit of the doubt and how that becomes relationship changing.

       

      The recaps of these challenges is about getting into more detail about why the challenge was included in the book, to hear what experts have to say about the topic, and to see what it looks like in real life.

      These 21 Challenges are not just a random bunch of challenges I threw together. They have been chosen for specific reasons, and the shifts they cause in every day lives just by using them. That’s what these episodes are about - is delving into why each challenge is important.

      So let’s talk about the challenge of giving someone the benefit of the doubt. —challenge #5.

      Giving someone the benefit of the doubt may be easier than it sounds. But first let’s talk about what it is:

      The Urban Dictionary says, To give someone the benefit of the doubt is to default to the belief that their intentions are honest, and not assume malice when there is uncertainty or doubt surrounding the circumstances.

      Or, in other words, to believe something good about someone, rather than something bad, when you have the possibility of doing either. 

      The reason this challenge is included is because this small decision will make a huge difference in your relationships, and the challenges are to help you create connection in your life.

      Benefit of the doubt example:

      John didn't pay me back the $20 he owes me, but I'll give him the benefit of the doubt that he simply forgot and isn't trying to rip me off.

      Jill is late, but there must be a good reason and it’s not just because she doesn’t respect my time.

      My spouse hasn’t done what they agreed to do, but before getting upset I’ll talk to them about it - something probably got in the way.

      Let’s talk about doing it ….giving the benefit of the doubt?

      When someone does or says something that irritates you, feels unfair, or feels like a betrayal, giving the benefit of the doubt means that you consciously change the way you are interpreting the situation and the story you are building around it, and instead find a way to give that person the benefit of the doubt that they did not mean offense, that they are doing the best they can, that there is part of the story you don’t understand, or consider that there may be a misunderstanding.

      People rub up against each other (metaphorically speaking) all the time; it’s what we do. There are rubs and irritants, and miscommunications every day. But if everyone gave each other the benefit of the doubt that they meant well, or that they are doing the best they can in their current state of understanding, I suspect life would generate a whole lot less friction and we would instead create grace for others. 

      I know I am always grateful when people afford me a little grace and create stories that are generous and kind rather than being quick to take offense. I never mean to be offensive but sometimes I most certainly am, and I appreciate it when a friend or person is mature enough not to jump to conclusions or offense.

      It is human nature to want to make sense of things we see and hear, so we try to fill in the details. This is where we get power - Instead of filling the stories with negative beliefs, fill other people’s stories with compassion. The person with the scowl is not angry with you; rather, they are having a bad day and could use a smile.

      The guy riding your bumper in traffic might really have an emergency he needs to speed to, he’s not just being a jerk.

      By choosing to fill stories with kindness rather than negativity, this obviously changes our interactions with others because if we go in having filled in negative details or taken things at face value we’ll be ready to fight or confront. But, if we fill their stories with compassion, we will begin our interactions with kindness. And this one choice changes everything.

      The main reason we we strive to give the benefit of the doubt, which I know first-hand, is when we do it saves our relationships. For me, it saves how I feel about the people in my life.

      Years ago I was just starting to go out with a guy that I had known from high school. He was the heart throb back then and a big catch, but he was a hard one to get to know. Well….One of my friends who had known him was supposed to be putting in a good word for me - in fabulous Jr. high style, even though we were adults, but every time I spoke with her about if she’d had the conversation with him, she just put me off. I was really hurt by her lack of support because we had been good friends since high school and I had supported her with many such things, and I couldn’t figure out why she would tell me one thing and then act differently - act like she was on board and then not follow through. I felt a sense of betrayal, if I’m honest. I felt like she was letting me down when I felt like she could really help out and it didn’t seem like it would be much skin off her back - a simple thing. After a few weeks of this I realized my feelings toward her were really changing. I wasn’t feeling like she was a good friend. I wasn’t feeling like I could trust her to have my back. It was a real cross-roads moment. I recognized that if I did not come up with a way to give her the benefit of the doubt that I would be forfeiting this friendship. So I made the choice…I made the conscious choice to create a reality in my own head that allowed for her own issues, her own jealousy, her inability to be straight forward with me, and to allow her to be whole, with all her issues and choices, because that’s what friends do. It allowed me to continue my friendship with her - which I have never regretted.

      Boots on the ground - giving the benefit of the doubt saves relationships, creates less stress, and generates better feelings in our own hearts

      Liz Newman said, “Give people the benefit of the doubt, over and over again, and do the same for yourself. Believe that you’re trying and that they’re trying. See the good in others, so it brings out the best in you.” 

      I have a special treat for you today - some of the people who have been taking the challenges are families - which include, of course, children and teens. Three of these fabulous kids have offered to share their experiences with this challenge.

      Here they are:

      Tune into the audio program to hear these teen's experiences with the challenge.

      Quick recap: Giving the benefit of the doubt does primarily 3 things: 1. Saves your relationships 2. Creates less stress for you. 3. Changes the energy at which you approach people which changes outcomes for the better.

      Your challenge this week is to keep this top of mind and to practice giving the benefit of the doubt. I’d love to hear from you about your experience. Email me at lorijlee@msn.com with Challenge 5 in the subject line. You can do this at home with family members, with people across the board whether you know them or not, so there is lots of opportunity.

      If you want your own copy of the 21 LIFE Connection Challenges hop on Amazon or hit up loveyourstorypodcast.com for a link to Amazon to get your own copy.

      We’ll see you in two weeks for our next episode.

      ]]>2fedcb5c-5173-4452-ac3e-791d5423191bWed, 26 Aug 2020 09:00:00 -070015:49falsefull174174Lori LeeEpisode173 - Rare Faith: Interview with Leslie HouseholderEpisode173 - Rare Faith: Interview with Leslie Householder

       

      Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast my beloved audience. How many of you have heard of the term, “Rare Faith?”

      There is the simple faith that we have knowing the sun will rise each morning, because we’ve seen it thousands of times. Then there is the type of faith that makes things happen. Today on the show I have Leslie Householder. Stay tuned for lots of wisdom from this woman who has the Rare Faith Platform where she teaches universal laws.

       

      Leslie is the ward-winning international best selling author of The Jackrabbit Factor, Portal to Genius and Hidden Treasures. These books are all about how we access heaven’s help in our money matters and how this rare faith is the key to making things happen. She has helped people all over the world discover and apply the Rare kind of faith that causes powerful life changes. She takes time to help those in her audience crush every challenge, achieve every goal, and vanquish every monster under their beds. She is also - above all - a dedicated wife and mother of seven children. Yes…..she does alllll this. 

      Tune into the audio program to hear her answers to questions like:

      1. Where did you get the term Rare Faith?
      2. How did you come to understand the idea of rare faith?
      3. How have you used rare faith in your own life. What did that look like?
      4. You have a book called Hidden Treasures that explains a list of universal laws and how they work. I’ve often thought, as I’ve heard the statement that all blessings are predicated on laws, that if I only knew what the laws were that were tied to the blessings I wanted, then I could more actively seek the outcomes I wished for. Tell us a little about these universal laws.
      5. How have you tested them?
      6. How often does your faith falter?
      7. How do we come to really understand a universal law? Trial and error? How often is there error if it’s a law?
      8. How do you share and teach these? How can people find you if they want more information?

      
      

       

      There are laws of the universe we are very familiar with - like the law of gravity. We know it works whether we believe in it or not. It makes sense that the other laws of the universe work the same way. It also makes sense to me that laws were put in place to govern the unfolding of seasons, the circle of life, the earth on its track in the universe, so why wouldn’t God have also put into place laws that determined outcomes for his children. Laws that, like science and physics, are consistent? These are the laws we talked about today. How powerful would we be if we came to truly understand, practice and create with these laws?

      It’s an exciting concept and I hope you got something wonderful out of listening to Leslie today.

      For more information on Leslie:

      leslie@rarefaith.org

      #rarefaith

      www.rarefaith.org

      Share this episode with someone else who would find interesting. Sharing a podcast episode is an easy way to do a random act of kindness for someone. And it you REALLY liked it, share it on your social media and tag me.

      Thanks for being here - remember you’ve always got the loveyourstorypodcast website where you can get links to all the past episodes, you can order your LYS t-shirts, you can find a link to buy LIFE - Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday - the 21 LIFE Connection Challenges, or you can find our new link to TELL YOUR STORY where you can start to get your own story/life history recorded in audio format.

      See you in two weeks.

      *Thanks to Franz Danzi: Wind Quintet Opus 67, Nos.2 by Soni Ventorum Wind Quintet for music in this podcast.

      ]]>Episode173 - Rare Faith: Interview with Leslie Householder

       

      Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast my beloved audience. How many of you have heard of the term, “Rare Faith?”

      There is the simple faith that we have knowing the sun will rise each morning, because we’ve seen it thousands of times. Then there is the type of faith that makes things happen. Today on the show I have Leslie Householder. Stay tuned for lots of wisdom from this woman who has the Rare Faith Platform where she teaches universal laws.

       

      Leslie is the ward-winning international best selling author of The Jackrabbit Factor, Portal to Genius and Hidden Treasures. These books are all about how we access heaven’s help in our money matters and how this rare faith is the key to making things happen. She has helped people all over the world discover and apply the Rare kind of faith that causes powerful life changes. She takes time to help those in her audience crush every challenge, achieve every goal, and vanquish every monster under their beds. She is also - above all - a dedicated wife and mother of seven children. Yes…..she does alllll this. 

      Tune into the audio program to hear her answers to questions like:

      1. Where did you get the term Rare Faith?
      2. How did you come to understand the idea of rare faith?
      3. How have you used rare faith in your own life. What did that look like?
      4. You have a book called Hidden Treasures that explains a list of universal laws and how they work. I’ve often thought, as I’ve heard the statement that all blessings are predicated on laws, that if I only knew what the laws were that were tied to the blessings I wanted, then I could more actively seek the outcomes I wished for. Tell us a little about these universal laws.
      5. How have you tested them?
      6. How often does your faith falter?
      7. How do we come to really understand a universal law? Trial and error? How often is there error if it’s a law?
      8. How do you share and teach these? How can people find you if they want more information?

      
      

       

      There are laws of the universe we are very familiar with - like the law of gravity. We know it works whether we believe in it or not. It makes sense that the other laws of the universe work the same way. It also makes sense to me that laws were put in place to govern the unfolding of seasons, the circle of life, the earth on its track in the universe, so why wouldn’t God have also put into place laws that determined outcomes for his children. Laws that, like science and physics, are consistent? These are the laws we talked about today. How powerful would we be if we came to truly understand, practice and create with these laws?

      It’s an exciting concept and I hope you got something wonderful out of listening to Leslie today.

      For more information on Leslie:

      leslie@rarefaith.org

      #rarefaith

      www.rarefaith.org

      Share this episode with someone else who would find interesting. Sharing a podcast episode is an easy way to do a random act of kindness for someone. And it you REALLY liked it, share it on your social media and tag me.

      Thanks for being here - remember you’ve always got the loveyourstorypodcast website where you can get links to all the past episodes, you can order your LYS t-shirts, you can find a link to buy LIFE - Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday - the 21 LIFE Connection Challenges, or you can find our new link to TELL YOUR STORY where you can start to get your own story/life history recorded in audio format.

      See you in two weeks.

      *Thanks to Franz Danzi: Wind Quintet Opus 67, Nos.2 by Soni Ventorum Wind Quintet for music in this podcast.

      ]]>4b64df43-67a2-415a-8ff8-1c1b8433be7dWed, 12 Aug 2020 09:00:00 -070035:59falsefull173173Lori LeeEpisode 172: Letting Go of the Past - Interview with Djana KazicEpisode 172: Letting Go of the Past - Interview with Djana Kazic

      What happens when you have a past that you need to let go of?

      My guest today is Dana Kazic, born and raised in Sarajevo, Bosnia and Herzegovina. Caught in the middle of the Bosnian conflict, shot as a teenager during that war, Djana says the saddest thing she sees is how so many people play the victim role - she still sees it in Bosnia - people who can’t let go of wrongs done to them. Her choice to finally leave the area, despite her close relationship to her family, to create a better destiny for herself is a story she wants to share. She says, “Everyone is the creator of their own universe. Your thoughts and words become your reality. Dare to dream for fortune follows the brave.” Stay tuned for Djana’s story and what she learned having spent 3 years mostly without electricity, water, little food and grenades constantly falling on them, never knowing if she would see her family again from day to day.

       

      Djana has spent her time since the war getting an education, working, and globe trotting. She to her BA in Sarajevo, her Masters in Italy, did her management training in Malaysia and got her PhD in Hawaii. Today she’s her to share her story.

       

      Tune into the audio program for her story and interview.

       

      Do you have a story - something that happened to you in your past that makes you feel like a victim? Something that happened that you haven’t been able to let go of?

      If you need to reframe a story that is holding you back - please go back and listen to episodes 46-50 of the Love Your Story podcast, for 5 full episodes that explore the steps of how to truly reframe a story so you can find the meaning and purpose in the experience - so the story can support and build a better life moving forward rather than keep a holdin’ you back.

      There is also an online course you can purchase on the website: www.loveyourstorypodcast.com for the 5 steps to reframing your stories. These tools have been provided to help you love your story. Because that’s what this is all about.

      Thanks for being here this week - share the episode with one other person who would find value in this story. It makes the world better to share the love.

      See you in two weeks for the next new episode of the Love Your Story podcast.

      ]]>Episode 172: Letting Go of the Past - Interview with Djana Kazic

      What happens when you have a past that you need to let go of?

      My guest today is Dana Kazic, born and raised in Sarajevo, Bosnia and Herzegovina. Caught in the middle of the Bosnian conflict, shot as a teenager during that war, Djana says the saddest thing she sees is how so many people play the victim role - she still sees it in Bosnia - people who can’t let go of wrongs done to them. Her choice to finally leave the area, despite her close relationship to her family, to create a better destiny for herself is a story she wants to share. She says, “Everyone is the creator of their own universe. Your thoughts and words become your reality. Dare to dream for fortune follows the brave.” Stay tuned for Djana’s story and what she learned having spent 3 years mostly without electricity, water, little food and grenades constantly falling on them, never knowing if she would see her family again from day to day.

       

      Djana has spent her time since the war getting an education, working, and globe trotting. She to her BA in Sarajevo, her Masters in Italy, did her management training in Malaysia and got her PhD in Hawaii. Today she’s her to share her story.

       

      Tune into the audio program for her story and interview.

       

      Do you have a story - something that happened to you in your past that makes you feel like a victim? Something that happened that you haven’t been able to let go of?

      If you need to reframe a story that is holding you back - please go back and listen to episodes 46-50 of the Love Your Story podcast, for 5 full episodes that explore the steps of how to truly reframe a story so you can find the meaning and purpose in the experience - so the story can support and build a better life moving forward rather than keep a holdin’ you back.

      There is also an online course you can purchase on the website: www.loveyourstorypodcast.com for the 5 steps to reframing your stories. These tools have been provided to help you love your story. Because that’s what this is all about.

      Thanks for being here this week - share the episode with one other person who would find value in this story. It makes the world better to share the love.

      See you in two weeks for the next new episode of the Love Your Story podcast.

      ]]>162c69b6-8520-4bed-9473-9be918bed4cdWed, 29 Jul 2020 09:00:00 -070032:11falsefull172172Lori LeeEpisode 171: Challenge #4 - Success FileEpisode 171: Challenge #4 - Success File

      Welcome Listeners to the Love Your Story podcast. Today’s episode is a part of a series where I am going into more detail on each of the challenges in my book - LIFE Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday, the 21 Life Connection Challenges.

      
      

      In episode 89  I went into some wonderful detail about the process of doing Random Acts of Kindness  —Challenge # 1 in the 21 Life Connection Challenges— and we did some boots on the ground recording on the RAK night and what they looked like, what  popped up for those doing the acts of kindness, and what feelings and thoughts doing the RAK’s generated in those doing them. Responses of those who got the acts of kindness. It’s all a lot less predictable than it sounds.

      
      

      In episode 164 I went into detail with Ashley Stuart, a de-clutter expert, and we talked about why challenge #2 - to get rid of 1 thing you no longer need - is so much more important than this simple act seems on the surface. 

      
      

      In episode 170 I tackled an in-depth on challenge #3 where we looked at what it really means and looks like to find the lesson in something that doesn’t go your way. Again, great stuff with expert Leslie Householder on finding the gratitude and lesson in our trials or disappointments.

      
      

      This series of episodes is specifically to delve into why these challenges were included in the book in the first place, by getting into more detail about what they are, having experts weigh in on the ideas, and then showing real life examples.

      
      

      Tune into the audio because today we are exploring Challenge #4 - it’s a thing I call Success-file.

      
      

      Let’s jump right in! What is challenge #4? 

      
      

      Challenge #4 is “At the end of the day as you are lying in bed, make a mental list of all the things you accomplished today.”  Now stick with me here - I know it seems easy, but some of the best things are!

      
      

      This is one of my favorite challenges. I call it Success file - which is a play on words - success FUL - Success FILE. It’s one of my favorites because I love doing it. Because it makes me happy and because I get a great deal of satisfaction reliving, even just for a moment, the spaces in which I spent my time.

      
      

      The way this works is at the end of the day you list - either in your head, or on paper, everything you got done that day. This switches things up a bit, because the natural tendency is to consider and mull over everything we still need to get done and to stress about it as we are falling to sleep. This makes it so our mind can’t slow down which means it takes longer to go to sleep, and then the sleep isn’t as good because your subconscious is concerned with all you still need to do because that’s what you fell asleep thinking about.

      
      

      With Success Filing you lay in bed and count everything you did that day- “I got up and got out of bed. I had a shower and did my hair and make-up - nice job! I ate something healthy and made sure the kids had breakfast. I got all the kids to school. I did dishes. I had a good talk with a friend. I got to work on time. I sent a positive email. I said my prayers or went over gratitudes, I got caught up on….. you get the idea.

      
      

      Let’s talk about WHY…

      
      

      One way that we drive ourselves to overwhelm, stress and anxiety is by harboring a constant focus on what we have not yet accomplished. There will always be more to do, let’s get that out of the way right now. Even when you’re dead there will still be more that could be done, but I think what matters more is what you’ve already done and if you enjoyed that journey. I know that ENJOY THE JOURNEY is a cliche, but it’s a cliche’ because it is used often, and it is used often because it has real meaning. 

      
      

      If we take time to celebrate our wins —the small ones]]>Episode 171: Challenge #4 - Success File

      Welcome Listeners to the Love Your Story podcast. Today’s episode is a part of a series where I am going into more detail on each of the challenges in my book - LIFE Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday, the 21 Life Connection Challenges.

      
      

      In episode 89  I went into some wonderful detail about the process of doing Random Acts of Kindness  —Challenge # 1 in the 21 Life Connection Challenges— and we did some boots on the ground recording on the RAK night and what they looked like, what  popped up for those doing the acts of kindness, and what feelings and thoughts doing the RAK’s generated in those doing them. Responses of those who got the acts of kindness. It’s all a lot less predictable than it sounds.

      
      

      In episode 164 I went into detail with Ashley Stuart, a de-clutter expert, and we talked about why challenge #2 - to get rid of 1 thing you no longer need - is so much more important than this simple act seems on the surface. 

      
      

      In episode 170 I tackled an in-depth on challenge #3 where we looked at what it really means and looks like to find the lesson in something that doesn’t go your way. Again, great stuff with expert Leslie Householder on finding the gratitude and lesson in our trials or disappointments.

      
      

      This series of episodes is specifically to delve into why these challenges were included in the book in the first place, by getting into more detail about what they are, having experts weigh in on the ideas, and then showing real life examples.

      
      

      Tune into the audio because today we are exploring Challenge #4 - it’s a thing I call Success-file.

      
      

      Let’s jump right in! What is challenge #4? 

      
      

      Challenge #4 is “At the end of the day as you are lying in bed, make a mental list of all the things you accomplished today.”  Now stick with me here - I know it seems easy, but some of the best things are!

      
      

      This is one of my favorite challenges. I call it Success file - which is a play on words - success FUL - Success FILE. It’s one of my favorites because I love doing it. Because it makes me happy and because I get a great deal of satisfaction reliving, even just for a moment, the spaces in which I spent my time.

      
      

      The way this works is at the end of the day you list - either in your head, or on paper, everything you got done that day. This switches things up a bit, because the natural tendency is to consider and mull over everything we still need to get done and to stress about it as we are falling to sleep. This makes it so our mind can’t slow down which means it takes longer to go to sleep, and then the sleep isn’t as good because your subconscious is concerned with all you still need to do because that’s what you fell asleep thinking about.

      
      

      With Success Filing you lay in bed and count everything you did that day- “I got up and got out of bed. I had a shower and did my hair and make-up - nice job! I ate something healthy and made sure the kids had breakfast. I got all the kids to school. I did dishes. I had a good talk with a friend. I got to work on time. I sent a positive email. I said my prayers or went over gratitudes, I got caught up on….. you get the idea.

      
      

      Let’s talk about WHY…

      
      

      One way that we drive ourselves to overwhelm, stress and anxiety is by harboring a constant focus on what we have not yet accomplished. There will always be more to do, let’s get that out of the way right now. Even when you’re dead there will still be more that could be done, but I think what matters more is what you’ve already done and if you enjoyed that journey. I know that ENJOY THE JOURNEY is a cliche, but it’s a cliche’ because it is used often, and it is used often because it has real meaning. 

      
      

      If we take time to celebrate our wins —the small ones as well as large accomplishments, we improve our self esteem, we lower our stress, we get a moment of attention, satisfaction, and reconsideration about things that otherwise get pushed under the rug of time, lost to the pace of modern living.

      
      

      When I lay in bed and do this I feel wonderful. I count everything I did that day and I almost feel a sigh of relief in my soul. It’s a mini celebration that makes me feel accomplished and gives me time to think over and reminisce about the good, the things that are now OFF my list, and this make me feel strong. And, if there are a few things that went awry I get to consider what I might have done differently and shift quietly.

      
      

      I think the bottom line for doing this is simple - it makes us happier, improves our sleep, lessens our stress and improves our mood.

      
      

      Why do we need a tool like this in the first place?

      
      

      We are programmed, evolutionarily, to focus on what is wrong so we can protect ourselves from pain, attack, etc. It’s called a negativity bias. That’s why we can remember the emotional disappointments or traumas in our past so much easier than we can remember all the good things that happened to us. It’s so that we can remember what hurt us and stay away from it. The bummer side of this survival mechanism is that it creates a lot of unhappiness in our lives because our thoughts naturally swirl around the pain, the undone, the not right, and our thoughts create our reality and thus we end up having to actively manage our thoughts in order to create JOYFUL living on purpose. This involves monitoring the stories we are telling ourselves about our selves and our lives and the people and things going on around us. Well, challenge #4 is one of the techniques for managing the stories you are telling yourself about your journey.

      
      

      When you take the few minutes it takes to acknowledge your own daily progress, to focus on what you did instead of what you didn’t do, when you celebrate your success - large and small and become your own best cheerleader, you shift your energy and your reality and your journey.

      
      

      Bam! That is why this becomes a really gorgeous tool.

      
      

      Now let’s get a little outside thought on the topic:

      
      

      Rescue Time blog says, “When Harvard’s Teresa Amabile looked into the daily habits of hundreds of knowledge workers across industries, she found that out of all the things that can boost our mood and motivation during the workday, “the single most important is making progress on meaningful work.”

      
      

      Just like we love crossing small tasks off our to-do list, being able to see that we’re even one step closer to a big goal is a huge motivator. The problem is that these “small wins” are notoriously hard to measure. And worse, we tend to ignore them.”

      
      

      
      

      As author Jocelyn K. Glei notes: “Most of us make advances small and large every single day, but we fail to notice them because we lack a method for acknowledging our progress. This is a huge loss.

      
      

      There’s a reason we’re busier than ever but feel like nothing gets done. When all you see is a huge goal looming in front of you, it’s easy to get depressed and feel defeated.”

      
      

      Well, in response to Jocelyn’s comment that we lack a method for acknowledging our progress - NOW YOU NO LONGER LACK A METHOD. It’s called Success-File.

      
      

      Let’s talk a little data now: In a study conducted to determine how the normal life inside organizations influence performance, researchers had 238 employees, across seven companies, keep a daily diary. After looking over 12,000 diary entries they found that capturing small wins every day is what keeps us motivated. To increase self confidence, motivation, and future success, all you need to do is record the small wins. Why does this work? When we acknowledge that we accomplished something our reward center is activated and we feel a sense of pride - specifically, the neurochemical dopamine is released and we feel happy, energized, hopeful. It’s why we seek accomplishment in the first place - we are hooked on the feeling. By acknowledging the wins daily we keep happy, we keep motivated, we keep positive.”

      
      

      Well…that’s it for today people. Your challenge, of course, is to go to sleep tonight counting your accomplishments for the day, rather than sheep. And it will only take one day of doing this to realize how good it feels and you’ll be hooked.

      
      

      
      

      Let’s hear it for less stress, better sleep, and the joy of celebrating ALL that you do! 

      
      

      The tools are here for better living.

      
      

      If you’d like a copy of the 21 Challenges - Your own book with places to record your experiences. It’s yours. Easy to find on Amazon. It’s called LIFE -  Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday - the 21 Life Connection Challenges. Just search my name and the word LIFE in capital letters and it comes right up. You can also go to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and there is a link that will take you right to Amazon. The book has amazing challenges that have deep purpose in them. If you’re looking for a program or format for helping you to create more connection, possibility and self care in your life - I highly recommend all 21 challenges in the book. 

      
      

      Also - use the website to find all past episode and copy and share links of those episodes with the people you love. It’s an easy way to do an RAK - share an empowering episode with someone that would enjoy it.

      
      

      See you in two weeks for our next fabulous episode. Have fun success filing.

      ]]>4ea1600a-a24d-464f-b786-bb8f44228b14Wed, 15 Jul 2020 09:00:00 -070014:13falsefull171171Lori LeeEpisode 170 Life Through the Eyes of a Child Trapped in a Blind and Deaf Man's Body: Interview with Kenny Tedford & Paul Smithe33a492f-6b02-47d0-bd32-523028c5a41eWed, 01 Jul 2020 09:00:00 -070033:19falsefull170170Lori LeeEpisode 169: Challenge #3: Find the Lesson in Something that Doesn't Go Your WayEpisode 169: Challenge #3: Find the Lesson in Something that Doesn't Go Your Way

      Welcome Listeners to the Love Your Story podcast. Today’s episode is a part of a series where I am going into more detail on each of the challenges in my book - LIFE Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday, the 21 Life Connection Challenges.

      In episode 89 I went into some wonderful detail about the process of doing Random Acts of Kinds - and we got feedback from the RAK night and what they looked like, what popped up for those doing the acts of kindness, and what feelings and thoughts doing the RAK’s generated in those doing them. It’s all a lot less predictable than it sounds.

      In episode 163 I went into detail with Ashley Stuart, a de-clutter expert, and we talked about why challenge #2 - to get rid of 1 think you no longer need - is so much more important than this simple act seems on the surface. 

      These episodes open up the wonderful egg of why these challenges were included in the book in the first place by getting into more detail about what they are, having experts weigh in on the ideas, and then showing real life examples.

      Stay tuned because today we are exploring Challenge #3 - to find the lesson in something that doesn’t go your way.

      Maya Angelo said, “If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude.”. 

      Amen, sista!

      There are lots of ways to look at life. Lots of ways to look at every event that happens to us and the way we interpret it. I’m talking about the guy who cuts us off in traffic, or your friend that always shows up late - I’m talking about every day stuff. When we learn how to be aware of our conclusion and interpretations of them, and then we get good at choosing perceptions that serve us, then we control our own destiny with power.

      We acknowledge all the time that our stories are filled with challenges - people we clash with; lost love; bad drivers; situations that require the depths of our patience; health and body issues; disappointments; lost jobs; that lump of coal you got for Christmas; the state of the world; the defining of sharks.

      Of course there are also moments of beauty and miracles, but this challenge is about the habit of how we deal with disappointments and challenges. One of the tays we can approach life is with the idea that everything is a life lesson. If you look at life as if the people you meet and everything you encounter are all a part of your learning experience here in this thing we call life, then we get lots of opportunities to choose attitude.

      When we approach life as if all our experiences hold a gift for us then hope and faith become our companions instead of blaming, bitterness and disappointment. 

      It’s easy to start making up stories about ourselves and others when things don’t happen the way we want: I’m not good enough; that person had it out for me; my boss doesn’t really like me, the world is full of assholes. None of these are helpful stories - even if they seem real. That’s where the practiced habit of remembering that you get the wonderful challenge and opportunity to choose how you see things. 

      1. Become aware of your interpretations
      2. Remember they are not fact - they are created by your upbringing, culture, belief system, education, assumptions, etc.
      3. Choose to shift the negative interpretations into ones that will serve you better.

      
      

      What do I mean by ones that serve you better? Choose interpretations that focus on the lesson or meaning in something really hard. For example, when I was first reframing my story about many difficult things that had happened to me as I went through 3 divorces, I realized, with some reframing help, that I had experienced many things that gave me massive amounts of empathy for others. I had gained empathy and understanding that helped me grow. My most...]]>Episode 169: Challenge #3: Find the Lesson in Something that Doesn't Go Your Way

      Welcome Listeners to the Love Your Story podcast. Today’s episode is a part of a series where I am going into more detail on each of the challenges in my book - LIFE Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday, the 21 Life Connection Challenges.

      In episode 89 I went into some wonderful detail about the process of doing Random Acts of Kinds - and we got feedback from the RAK night and what they looked like, what popped up for those doing the acts of kindness, and what feelings and thoughts doing the RAK’s generated in those doing them. It’s all a lot less predictable than it sounds.

      In episode 163 I went into detail with Ashley Stuart, a de-clutter expert, and we talked about why challenge #2 - to get rid of 1 think you no longer need - is so much more important than this simple act seems on the surface. 

      These episodes open up the wonderful egg of why these challenges were included in the book in the first place by getting into more detail about what they are, having experts weigh in on the ideas, and then showing real life examples.

      Stay tuned because today we are exploring Challenge #3 - to find the lesson in something that doesn’t go your way.

      Maya Angelo said, “If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude.”. 

      Amen, sista!

      There are lots of ways to look at life. Lots of ways to look at every event that happens to us and the way we interpret it. I’m talking about the guy who cuts us off in traffic, or your friend that always shows up late - I’m talking about every day stuff. When we learn how to be aware of our conclusion and interpretations of them, and then we get good at choosing perceptions that serve us, then we control our own destiny with power.

      We acknowledge all the time that our stories are filled with challenges - people we clash with; lost love; bad drivers; situations that require the depths of our patience; health and body issues; disappointments; lost jobs; that lump of coal you got for Christmas; the state of the world; the defining of sharks.

      Of course there are also moments of beauty and miracles, but this challenge is about the habit of how we deal with disappointments and challenges. One of the tays we can approach life is with the idea that everything is a life lesson. If you look at life as if the people you meet and everything you encounter are all a part of your learning experience here in this thing we call life, then we get lots of opportunities to choose attitude.

      When we approach life as if all our experiences hold a gift for us then hope and faith become our companions instead of blaming, bitterness and disappointment. 

      It’s easy to start making up stories about ourselves and others when things don’t happen the way we want: I’m not good enough; that person had it out for me; my boss doesn’t really like me, the world is full of assholes. None of these are helpful stories - even if they seem real. That’s where the practiced habit of remembering that you get the wonderful challenge and opportunity to choose how you see things. 

      1. Become aware of your interpretations
      2. Remember they are not fact - they are created by your upbringing, culture, belief system, education, assumptions, etc.
      3. Choose to shift the negative interpretations into ones that will serve you better.

      
      

      What do I mean by ones that serve you better? Choose interpretations that focus on the lesson or meaning in something really hard. For example, when I was first reframing my story about many difficult things that had happened to me as I went through 3 divorces, I realized, with some reframing help, that I had experienced many things that gave me massive amounts of empathy for others. I had gained empathy and understanding that helped me grow. My most painful life moments had still been painful and had still been gigantic and had still often been the choices of other people that affected me, but I could focus on that or I could focus on what I learned and how I became better because of that learning.

      An interpretation that serves you is one that lightens the load of stress, anger, victimhood, frustration, and fear.

      I’m always a believer that real life examples help teach best so I have three for you today. These 3 folks agreed to tackle Challenge #3 that week and then record a blurb for me on how they shifted their interpretation of a frustrating situation into one that helped them learn or find positive things in it.

      Listen to the audio program to hear 3 audio recordings of people who took the challenge.

      Now, let’s go to our expert.

      Leslie Householder is joining me today to bring us all examples and wisdom.

      Listen to the audio program to hear my interview with Leslie.

      I’m going to close with one quote that sums it all up:

      Dale Carnegie said, “Happiness does not depend on any external conditions, it is governed by our mental attitude.”

      It is my hope that you will take this challenge in you own life and start to practice it. It’s worth the work it will take at first, because soon enough you’ll get so you go there looking for a reframe more naturally.

      If you’d like a copy of LIFE- Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday - the 21 Life Connection Challenges, you can get your own copy with ALL the challenges in it off Amazon. Just search my name and the word LIFE in capital letters and it comes right up. You can also go to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and there is a link that will take you right to Amazon. The book has amazing challenges that have deep purpose in them. If you’re looking for a program or format for helping you to create more connection, possibility and self care in your life - I highly recommend all 21 challenges in the book. It’s also a workbook style with a place at the end of each challenge to record your experiences. It’s all part of the learning.

      See you in two weeks for our next fabulous episode.

      ]]>a7d33882-b19c-47f4-a32e-73fc5061b44cWed, 17 Jun 2020 09:00:00 -070033:35falsefull169169Lori LeeEpisode 168: My Last Bad Day - the SHIFT - Interview Michael OBrienEpisode 168: My Last Bad Day - The SHIFT - Interview Michael O'Brien

       

      On the morning of July 11, 2001, Michael O’Brien, an avid cyclist, was riding his bicycle on a New Mexico road when an SUV hit him head-on going 40 mph. The crushing accident left him near death as the mede-vac helicopter descended to take his broken body to be pieced back together. Today Michael is with us and will take us to the darkness of his accident and the long, slow road to recovery, but he’ll also take us to his shift - the moment when he decided it was the power of his mind that would decide the rest of his life. It wasn’t the tragedy that would define him, but how he responded to the tragedy.

      I recently returned from a Genius Bootcamp, put on by Leslie Householder, in Arizona. The concept behind her teachings are a greater understanding of universal law and how to implement those laws for the greatest most powerful creations of our own lives. At the very foundation of universal law is the understanding of the power of the human mind. Where we focus our attention begins to create things spiritually, and eventually we bring those into the physical world - whether it’s an idea of something we want to create, attracting money, or changing our vibrations to live healthier or with more joy. Truth always ties into truth and as I read Michael O’Brien’s book Shift  and cheered him on as he intentionally chose the mindset and perspective that would help him make his way back into a life he wanted, I just smiled at the way this truth comes up over and over. This is why I’m always asking you, “What story are you telling yourself?” “Are you creating your life on purpose?” And “You’re responsible for creating the life story you want to tell.” It’s all about our personal agency to shift our story when needed.”

      Listen to the audio program to hear Michael's story and how he shifted. We talk about questions like:

      1. Your accident was almost 20 years ago and I believe your book just came out. When did you decide you wanted to start sharing your story and why?

      2. Take us back to the accident - what do you remember?

      3. What was the hardest part?

      4. What would you do differently?

      5. What were you most grateful for at the time?

      6. How did the shift happen?

      7. You have 20 tips at the back of your book - can you share your top 3?

      When I talk about reframing our stories - the ones that are holding us back, I’m talking about this very thing - this SHIFT. When we are stuck in a story that isn’t serving us, we MUST understand that we can shift our perspective and change our interpretation in order to stay on higher vibrational levels - in order to stay out of the victim mindset - in order to live our best life story. 

      I’m grateful to Michael for sharing his story and his shift and giving us a visual of what that looks like in action. The power of our minds more vast than we can comprehend. Use yours to create your best space: to lift you when you are down, to intentionally create the life you want, to overcome.

      For more information on Michael and his books:

      www.facebook.com/michaelspeloton

      www.instagram.com/michaelobrienshift

      Books: My Last Bed Day Shift, and his memoir: Shift: Creating Better Tomorrows

      Your challenge this week is to find a story that needs to shift for you. Are you in a fight with your spouse and you can choose to let go of a way of seeing something that can help you find a happier space? Are you holding a grudge - can you shift and give someone the benefit of the doubt? Do you have something bigger that needs a major shift? Try changing the thought and see what happens. Things only have the power we give them.

      See you in two weeks on the next episode of Love Your Story

      ]]>Episode 168: My Last Bad Day - The SHIFT - Interview Michael O'Brien

       

      On the morning of July 11, 2001, Michael O’Brien, an avid cyclist, was riding his bicycle on a New Mexico road when an SUV hit him head-on going 40 mph. The crushing accident left him near death as the mede-vac helicopter descended to take his broken body to be pieced back together. Today Michael is with us and will take us to the darkness of his accident and the long, slow road to recovery, but he’ll also take us to his shift - the moment when he decided it was the power of his mind that would decide the rest of his life. It wasn’t the tragedy that would define him, but how he responded to the tragedy.

      I recently returned from a Genius Bootcamp, put on by Leslie Householder, in Arizona. The concept behind her teachings are a greater understanding of universal law and how to implement those laws for the greatest most powerful creations of our own lives. At the very foundation of universal law is the understanding of the power of the human mind. Where we focus our attention begins to create things spiritually, and eventually we bring those into the physical world - whether it’s an idea of something we want to create, attracting money, or changing our vibrations to live healthier or with more joy. Truth always ties into truth and as I read Michael O’Brien’s book Shift  and cheered him on as he intentionally chose the mindset and perspective that would help him make his way back into a life he wanted, I just smiled at the way this truth comes up over and over. This is why I’m always asking you, “What story are you telling yourself?” “Are you creating your life on purpose?” And “You’re responsible for creating the life story you want to tell.” It’s all about our personal agency to shift our story when needed.”

      Listen to the audio program to hear Michael's story and how he shifted. We talk about questions like:

      1. Your accident was almost 20 years ago and I believe your book just came out. When did you decide you wanted to start sharing your story and why?

      2. Take us back to the accident - what do you remember?

      3. What was the hardest part?

      4. What would you do differently?

      5. What were you most grateful for at the time?

      6. How did the shift happen?

      7. You have 20 tips at the back of your book - can you share your top 3?

      When I talk about reframing our stories - the ones that are holding us back, I’m talking about this very thing - this SHIFT. When we are stuck in a story that isn’t serving us, we MUST understand that we can shift our perspective and change our interpretation in order to stay on higher vibrational levels - in order to stay out of the victim mindset - in order to live our best life story. 

      I’m grateful to Michael for sharing his story and his shift and giving us a visual of what that looks like in action. The power of our minds more vast than we can comprehend. Use yours to create your best space: to lift you when you are down, to intentionally create the life you want, to overcome.

      For more information on Michael and his books:

      www.facebook.com/michaelspeloton

      www.instagram.com/michaelobrienshift

      Books: My Last Bed Day Shift, and his memoir: Shift: Creating Better Tomorrows

      Your challenge this week is to find a story that needs to shift for you. Are you in a fight with your spouse and you can choose to let go of a way of seeing something that can help you find a happier space? Are you holding a grudge - can you shift and give someone the benefit of the doubt? Do you have something bigger that needs a major shift? Try changing the thought and see what happens. Things only have the power we give them.

      See you in two weeks on the next episode of Love Your Story

      ]]>5d68b818-5fb9-47e0-8211-7ac6feea0d2dWed, 03 Jun 2020 09:00:00 -070042:33falsefull168168Lori LeeEpisode 167: Life Interrupted - Problems Call Forth our Courage and our WisdomEpisode 167: Life Interrupted - Problems Call Forth our Courage and our Wisdom

      Scott Peck, author of The Road Less Traveled said, “Problems call forth our courage and our wisdom; indeed, they create our courage and our wisdom. It is only because of problems that we grow mentally and spiritually.” 

      Stay tuned for today’s episode which I have created to remind you about all the courage and wisdom you’ve gained from your problems and challenges, and that life interrupted is actually just life.

      As most of you know, the Love Your Story podcast started from an earlier time in my life where I didn’t love my story. I felt shame and disappointment about my three failed marriages. I felt like I had failed in places where I was meant to succeed. What I wasn’t seeing during those rough years was that the relationship problems and all my efforts at saving my relationships, the struggles and the learning, the mistakes, the stretching that was required in the most painful places, and maybe especially the spiritual experiences I had as I tried to stand again after being metaphorically gutted in all kinds of ways….well these events would create courage and wisdom. They would show me my own strength. They would give me empathy and understanding I could never have had if I hadn’t been in the battles I’d fought.

      Elisabeth Kubler Ross said, “The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation , a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fill them with compassion, gentleness and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.” 

      Today’s episode is a reminder that the problems in your life, big and small, have the potential to call forth your courage and wisdom. They have the potential to create in you understanding and empathy, and to align you with the human plight in ways that the easy life could not. As we traverse our problems sometimes it’s hard to remember that they are opportunities, that they are workshops, so this reminder episode is a space for you to look at the problem you are currently wrestling with - what is it? Let’s pinpoint it right here……., now console yourself with the knowledge that you are growing, and then consider what story you can create around it that will serve you best - that will help with that growth state, that will bring hope bubbling to the surface, even if it’s just hope for a better time, with the knowing that at some point the difficult parts of your journey will make more sense.

      
      

      In episode 22 Becky Andrews, a blind woman, mom, and mental health councilor shares a story of an important crossroads where she recognized a crucial moment in her life - where she could choose to control her fear or to stay home bound. She shifted from her fear and chose how she was going to let her problem of losing her eyesight and the fear she felt control her life. Here’s Becky:

      
      

      Tune in for this flashback clip...

      
      

      Hellen Keller once said, “Although the world is very full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it.”

      
      

      The overcoming of it - the struggle, these are the opportunities of the metaphorical cocoon. Richard Bach, one of my favorite writers - pointed out, “What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls the butterfly.”

      
      

      We are all at a different stage within our cocoons - changing, growing, turning stubby legs into beautiful wings. I always remember the example taught in grade school - you can’t help a chicken break out of it’s egg or it won’t be strong enough to survive. You can’t pry a roses petals open or it will wilt and die. You can’t tear open the cocoon to help the butterfly emerge - the butterfly must break out of...]]>Episode 167: Life Interrupted - Problems Call Forth our Courage and our Wisdom

      Scott Peck, author of The Road Less Traveled said, “Problems call forth our courage and our wisdom; indeed, they create our courage and our wisdom. It is only because of problems that we grow mentally and spiritually.” 

      Stay tuned for today’s episode which I have created to remind you about all the courage and wisdom you’ve gained from your problems and challenges, and that life interrupted is actually just life.

      As most of you know, the Love Your Story podcast started from an earlier time in my life where I didn’t love my story. I felt shame and disappointment about my three failed marriages. I felt like I had failed in places where I was meant to succeed. What I wasn’t seeing during those rough years was that the relationship problems and all my efforts at saving my relationships, the struggles and the learning, the mistakes, the stretching that was required in the most painful places, and maybe especially the spiritual experiences I had as I tried to stand again after being metaphorically gutted in all kinds of ways….well these events would create courage and wisdom. They would show me my own strength. They would give me empathy and understanding I could never have had if I hadn’t been in the battles I’d fought.

      Elisabeth Kubler Ross said, “The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation , a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fill them with compassion, gentleness and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.” 

      Today’s episode is a reminder that the problems in your life, big and small, have the potential to call forth your courage and wisdom. They have the potential to create in you understanding and empathy, and to align you with the human plight in ways that the easy life could not. As we traverse our problems sometimes it’s hard to remember that they are opportunities, that they are workshops, so this reminder episode is a space for you to look at the problem you are currently wrestling with - what is it? Let’s pinpoint it right here……., now console yourself with the knowledge that you are growing, and then consider what story you can create around it that will serve you best - that will help with that growth state, that will bring hope bubbling to the surface, even if it’s just hope for a better time, with the knowing that at some point the difficult parts of your journey will make more sense.

      
      

      In episode 22 Becky Andrews, a blind woman, mom, and mental health councilor shares a story of an important crossroads where she recognized a crucial moment in her life - where she could choose to control her fear or to stay home bound. She shifted from her fear and chose how she was going to let her problem of losing her eyesight and the fear she felt control her life. Here’s Becky:

      
      

      Tune in for this flashback clip...

      
      

      Hellen Keller once said, “Although the world is very full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it.”

      
      

      The overcoming of it - the struggle, these are the opportunities of the metaphorical cocoon. Richard Bach, one of my favorite writers - pointed out, “What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls the butterfly.”

      
      

      We are all at a different stage within our cocoons - changing, growing, turning stubby legs into beautiful wings. I always remember the example taught in grade school - you can’t help a chicken break out of it’s egg or it won’t be strong enough to survive. You can’t pry a roses petals open or it will wilt and die. You can’t tear open the cocoon to help the butterfly emerge - the butterfly must break out of the cocoon itself in order to have the strength to fly off. We are of a grand design and that design requires struggle, but that struggle creates beauty. 

      
      

      Let me share another example from another earlier Love Your Story episode. This was one of the craziest stories I’ve heard on the podcast - 

      
      

      In episode 21 I interviewed Rusty Lindquist and he shared his story of his father trying to sacrifice him as Abraham tried to sacrifice Isaac in the Bible. His mother escapes with her two children but the drama and trauma doesn’t stop there… it’s an almost unbelievable story that I highly recommend going back and listening to, but I want to just share a clip today….

      
      

      Tune in for this flashback clip...

      
      

      His story is an excellent example of being able to choose the story you create about your experiences - Rusty could have been a VERY traumatized and broken man, but his choice to look at his story as the space for overcoming and sharing created a successful outlook on life for him. He went on to creat a solid marriage, a close family with lots of kids, a successful and stable career, and a platform for sharing his story to help others. This was built intentionally. This was the overcoming.

      
      

      In episode 65 Annadel Lemon shares some ideas on taking back our power. I don’t know all the processes of healing that Rusty went through as he grew up, but this next example shines a light on the process of healing and being gentle with ourselves as we enter the recovery phase.

      
      

      When Annadel was 15 years old her father shot her mother and then killed himself in a tragedy that certainly created a difficult story for Annadel. Instead of letting her story and her problems hold her back Annadel found that she naturally started looking for things she could be grateful for in her life. She says that being able to get to that space of gratitude for the growth, the life shifts, the new opportunities, despite our losses, is key, but first there is a process of grieving our losses. I think this is an important piece of the puzzle as we discuss the ideas of life’s interruptions, because the space and compassion for ourselves, for our pain, for the processes we must go through is part of the growth, and we need to allow for that part of the struggle without self recrimination. Let’s be real about how we heal. It’s a process and that process requires self compassion, an allowing and a tenderness rather than judgement and pressure. Here’s what Annadel has to say: 

      Tune in for this flashback clip...

      
      

      As we are making our best life plans shit happens and life, the life we envisioned is interrupted or even completely rerouted. In episode 103/104 Taunia Terry finds her way back to herself after 5 abusive marriages - those weren’t in the plan. In episode 115 Sara Dean works through infertility and the life she had planned, the life she wanted, and creates something different than she originally expected - the Shameless Mom Academy. 

      
      

      When your husband leaves you unexpectedly, when you don’t get that promotion at work that you’ve invested years into getting, when you get that cancer diagnosis that changes your life, or your child is born with disabilities….what you pictured gets interrupted and the canvas you’re painting on suddenly has colors you never expected. 

      
      

      What do you do with those colors? That’s up to you - like Becky’s story; like Rusty’s story. We always have choice.

      
      

      Now, stick with me through a couple threaded thoughts - First, we all know the adage that Nobody said Life is Fair. It’s not. Second adage - You can do hard things. You can. Third adage, Life is Messy. That’s a fact. Fourth adage: Live Well. Laugh Often, Love Much. That one’s just annoying, but it’s still great advice.

      
      

      In other words, the very nature of this thing we call life is that nothing is guaranteed, fair, or easy, but that we are strong and we can choose to laugh, love, and live with beauty.

      
      

      In episode 30 - Titled “Beautiful People Do Not Just Happen.” I quoted Simon Sinek…and I want to use this quote again - 

      Simon Sinek said, “The most important thing to do before we die is live.” 

      I think Simon Sinek’s quote applies to this topic beautifully because times of trial are times when living is the hardest. It’s these hard, uphill climbs when we often want to stop – sit down on the metaphorical trail or jump off the cliff. I’ve had moments where I could not see any point in going on. I’ve had times I wanted the whole darn thing to be over with. But I’ve come to realize, that like it or not, living is a collage of beautiful spaces and staggering pain. There are incredible ah ha moments, peace is often fleeting, uncertainty is a given, and fear – in all its forms is a part of the game, but it’s also rife with accomplishment, joy, love, and magic. It’s a mixed bag of everything, and I’ll state the obvious - it’s the bad that helps us appreciate the good. It’s the dark that lets us see the light.

      
      

      Live with all you’ve got people - live before you die. There isn’t room for leaving early. You’ve got power, choices, and internal strength. Call on all of it when you need to, and I’m a fan of including God and all that extra power when things get beyond me - I highly recommend that. 

      
      

      Think back with me through your life. What courage and wisdom have you gained from your “life interrupted” moments? (Leave a space here……)

      
      

      The answer to this one question is enough to put things into perspective and even to shine a light of hope on any current interruptions to your ideal.

      
      

      Your wisdom and courage didn’t come from having everything go right. So, the fact that it may not all being going smoothly right now is still okay…it’s all going to be alright - all of it. Even the stuff that so inconsiderately interrupted your plan.

      
      

      You are getting tougher, wiser and braver and every time the skies darken you flex those muscles. 

      
      

      You choose to be held hostage by the worst things that have happened to you, or you find your way forward knowing that this too shall pass and when it does you’ll have a little more wisdom, a little more courage, and a greater understanding of your own strength.

      
      

      In the words of Aristotle, “It is during our darkest moments that we must focus to see the light.” 

      
      

      Life interrupted is just life. Not the life we planned, but have faith that the story ends with someone - YOU - who knows things they didn’t know when they started; who understands things they did not once understand, and along with that you’ll also have a bag of magic tricks you’ve learned along your journey. It really IS about the journey and the journey is an adventure, and the nature of an adventure is that you never know what’s around the next corner. Surprises are the norm and struggles make us strong, and the nature of life is the mixed bag of all of it.

      
      

      You’ve got this. 

      
      

      Thanks for being with me today.

      
      

      Quick reminder: Go to loveyourstorypodcast.com for your t-shirts, for the link to buy your copy of LIFE - Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday - my book with the 21 Life Connection Challenges in it, and to get a link to all the 160+ episodes that have aired over the past 3.5 years. Including the ones I shared snippets of today.

      
      

      Your challenge for the week is to take a moment and consider the toughest times of your life and to catalogue the growth that came to you during those times. It’s a GREAT journal entry that will serve to strengthen you even more.

      
      

      See you in two weeks - back here.

      ]]>e6cbff51-95ec-4c42-bcff-52e204388af0Wed, 20 May 2020 09:00:00 -070034:30falsefull167167Lori LeeEpisode166: Born to Succeed - Interview Braxton NielsenEpisode166: Born to Succeed - Interview Braxton Nielsen

      August 31, 2017 Braxton Nielsen was crushed and paralyzed by a bucking bronco in a rodeo in Filer, Idaho. Growing up his dad always told him he was born to succeed. Those comments created a mindset that would serve Braxton as he faced a broken back. 

      Aways interested in rodeo, Braxton placed 8th in the nation in 2017 and then went pro. His dream of becoming a world champion bareback rider was getting closer and closer, but life happened and after the accident Braxton was given less than a 5% chance of walking again. 

      Five fused vertebrae’s, two rods, eight screws, numbness in his right leg and can’t feel his left foot. Recover is a long road, but stay tuned today to hear about his journey and to soak in some of that positive attitude that Braxton exudes as he talks about life.

       

      Braxton was born and raised in Roosevelt Utah where he now resides with his lovely wife Heather. He grew up loving the outdoors, spending time with family, and he was a three sport athlete in high school where he received all state awards. Braxton says. “We as individuals were born to succeed. There are no limits. The only one that limits yourself is you. Life is great. Don’t waste a second being unhappy, but be grateful, be positive and truly know that you were born to succeed.”

      Tune into the audio program to hear Braxton's Story and to talk about questions like:

      1. When did you know you wanted to rodeo?

      2. What type of mental focus does it take to bareback ride?

      3. Did that help you deal with this?

      4. Tell me about the accident.

      5. What happened afterward?

      6. When did you decide you were going to beat it?

      7. What was it like?

      8. What was the hardest part?

      9. How did you get through that part?

      10. How do you stay so positive?

      11. How can other people keep that same attitude when they are faced with their tough spaces?

      The thing that stands out to me most about Braxton is his infectious optimism. It’s as if there really is no doubt that we are all incredibly powerful, born to succeed and nothing stands in our way. Thank YOU Braxton for sharing that faith, that optimism, and for shining a light on what it looks like to truly live big and face our problems head-on.

      More information on Braxton: Podcast: Born to Succeed; #borntosucceed

      Your challenge this week is to repeat this mantra - all week long - “I was born to succeed.” Do it on the way to work. Do it while you’re walking down the hall. Chant it in the shower! The subconscious is what creates our outcomes, and our subconscious is programed by emotion and repetition. There really is power to repetition and belief. Chant, baby chant.

      Thanks for being here this week - remember to use the website - loveyourstorypodcast.com where you can order your LYS t-shirt - share any LYS episode - or comment on episodes and share your own expiences. Remember that in 2020 I stated a new option called “Tell Your Story.” This is for people who want their own audio recording of their story - for posterity, for personal record, or know a family member or friend who should capture their story. Contact me at lorijlee@msn.com with Tell Your Story in the subject line and we’ll make that happen.

      See you in two weeks on the next episode.

      ]]>Episode166: Born to Succeed - Interview Braxton Nielsen

      August 31, 2017 Braxton Nielsen was crushed and paralyzed by a bucking bronco in a rodeo in Filer, Idaho. Growing up his dad always told him he was born to succeed. Those comments created a mindset that would serve Braxton as he faced a broken back. 

      Aways interested in rodeo, Braxton placed 8th in the nation in 2017 and then went pro. His dream of becoming a world champion bareback rider was getting closer and closer, but life happened and after the accident Braxton was given less than a 5% chance of walking again. 

      Five fused vertebrae’s, two rods, eight screws, numbness in his right leg and can’t feel his left foot. Recover is a long road, but stay tuned today to hear about his journey and to soak in some of that positive attitude that Braxton exudes as he talks about life.

       

      Braxton was born and raised in Roosevelt Utah where he now resides with his lovely wife Heather. He grew up loving the outdoors, spending time with family, and he was a three sport athlete in high school where he received all state awards. Braxton says. “We as individuals were born to succeed. There are no limits. The only one that limits yourself is you. Life is great. Don’t waste a second being unhappy, but be grateful, be positive and truly know that you were born to succeed.”

      Tune into the audio program to hear Braxton's Story and to talk about questions like:

      1. When did you know you wanted to rodeo?

      2. What type of mental focus does it take to bareback ride?

      3. Did that help you deal with this?

      4. Tell me about the accident.

      5. What happened afterward?

      6. When did you decide you were going to beat it?

      7. What was it like?

      8. What was the hardest part?

      9. How did you get through that part?

      10. How do you stay so positive?

      11. How can other people keep that same attitude when they are faced with their tough spaces?

      The thing that stands out to me most about Braxton is his infectious optimism. It’s as if there really is no doubt that we are all incredibly powerful, born to succeed and nothing stands in our way. Thank YOU Braxton for sharing that faith, that optimism, and for shining a light on what it looks like to truly live big and face our problems head-on.

      More information on Braxton: Podcast: Born to Succeed; #borntosucceed

      Your challenge this week is to repeat this mantra - all week long - “I was born to succeed.” Do it on the way to work. Do it while you’re walking down the hall. Chant it in the shower! The subconscious is what creates our outcomes, and our subconscious is programed by emotion and repetition. There really is power to repetition and belief. Chant, baby chant.

      Thanks for being here this week - remember to use the website - loveyourstorypodcast.com where you can order your LYS t-shirt - share any LYS episode - or comment on episodes and share your own expiences. Remember that in 2020 I stated a new option called “Tell Your Story.” This is for people who want their own audio recording of their story - for posterity, for personal record, or know a family member or friend who should capture their story. Contact me at lorijlee@msn.com with Tell Your Story in the subject line and we’ll make that happen.

      See you in two weeks on the next episode.

      ]]>3403bd9e-fb8d-438b-9a84-5441b2dff139Wed, 06 May 2020 09:00:00 -070031:55falsefull166166Lori LeeEpisode 165 COVID 19 Survivor Story: Interview Matt NeweyEpisode 165 COVID 19 Survivor Story:

      Interview Matt Newey

       

      Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Over the past month I’ve listened to a number of podcast hosts hop on and talk about their take regarding COVID 19 and the Coronavirus. I’m almost sick of hearing about it, but one thing I haven’t heard is a real first-hand account of having the virus. So….today that’s what I’m bringing to you. Stay tuned for my interview with Matt Newey, a 23 year old outdoor photographer/video from Centerville, UT. Who, on March 19th, was Utah’s 78th confirmed Covid-19 case. 

       

      Matt Newey most likely contracted the virus while on a ski trip to Colorado with four friends. 

      This is Matt’s Covid-19 story.

      First - let’s make Matt a real person. Here’s a little about him. Matt is a 23 year old outdoor photographer, videographer and adventurer. From the time Matt got his first Gopro camera at the age of 10 he has been videoing himself ever since doing ski backflips, rock climbing and searching for the perfect landscape photo. In high school shooting one of his many time lapse shots of the Great Salt Lake he realized his mission is to “chase sunsets for a living.” He further realized that this is his passion when he went off at 18 on an 8 day solo trip taking pictures on southern Utah. He’s a skier, a son, a brother, and an all around good kid who survived.

      Tune into the audio program to hear Matt tell his own story.

      To find Matt:

      Instagram: @mattcnewey https://www.instagram.com/mattcnewey/

      YouTube: https://youtu.be/Vd7tpRbas48

      Website: https://mattcnewey.com/work

      Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/666837390339248/posts/1063467160676267/?vh=e&d=n

      Lots of stories are being written right now. People who are getting COVID 19, people who are fighting it on the front lines, people who are terrified and living as such, people who are creating some wonderful family/home time during social distancing and quarantine.

      Personally I feel like this very odd time for us holds a basket of opportunities. Family time. Time to take stock of our preparedness. Time to focus on home and loved ones. Time to slow down. Time, like Matt has illustrated, where you are on the front lines and you have a story to share in order to help others better understand what is going on.

      I encourage all of us to turn to love, community, family and sharing to get the most beauty and positive outcome from a time in history that also holds the potential for loss and suffering. Each day write beautiful things into your story. Small and simple things that feel better than fear. 

      Also - it’s a great time for families to hop on Amazon and buy my book - LIFE - Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday - the 21 LIFE Connection challenges. I’ve gotten lots of reports of families who are doing the challenges together and making the most of their social distancing time while practicing fun life skills together.

      See you in two weeks on the next episode of the LYS podcast.

      ]]>Episode 165 COVID 19 Survivor Story:

      Interview Matt Newey

       

      Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Over the past month I’ve listened to a number of podcast hosts hop on and talk about their take regarding COVID 19 and the Coronavirus. I’m almost sick of hearing about it, but one thing I haven’t heard is a real first-hand account of having the virus. So….today that’s what I’m bringing to you. Stay tuned for my interview with Matt Newey, a 23 year old outdoor photographer/video from Centerville, UT. Who, on March 19th, was Utah’s 78th confirmed Covid-19 case. 

       

      Matt Newey most likely contracted the virus while on a ski trip to Colorado with four friends. 

      This is Matt’s Covid-19 story.

      First - let’s make Matt a real person. Here’s a little about him. Matt is a 23 year old outdoor photographer, videographer and adventurer. From the time Matt got his first Gopro camera at the age of 10 he has been videoing himself ever since doing ski backflips, rock climbing and searching for the perfect landscape photo. In high school shooting one of his many time lapse shots of the Great Salt Lake he realized his mission is to “chase sunsets for a living.” He further realized that this is his passion when he went off at 18 on an 8 day solo trip taking pictures on southern Utah. He’s a skier, a son, a brother, and an all around good kid who survived.

      Tune into the audio program to hear Matt tell his own story.

      To find Matt:

      Instagram: @mattcnewey https://www.instagram.com/mattcnewey/

      YouTube: https://youtu.be/Vd7tpRbas48

      Website: https://mattcnewey.com/work

      Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/666837390339248/posts/1063467160676267/?vh=e&d=n

      Lots of stories are being written right now. People who are getting COVID 19, people who are fighting it on the front lines, people who are terrified and living as such, people who are creating some wonderful family/home time during social distancing and quarantine.

      Personally I feel like this very odd time for us holds a basket of opportunities. Family time. Time to take stock of our preparedness. Time to focus on home and loved ones. Time to slow down. Time, like Matt has illustrated, where you are on the front lines and you have a story to share in order to help others better understand what is going on.

      I encourage all of us to turn to love, community, family and sharing to get the most beauty and positive outcome from a time in history that also holds the potential for loss and suffering. Each day write beautiful things into your story. Small and simple things that feel better than fear. 

      Also - it’s a great time for families to hop on Amazon and buy my book - LIFE - Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday - the 21 LIFE Connection challenges. I’ve gotten lots of reports of families who are doing the challenges together and making the most of their social distancing time while practicing fun life skills together.

      See you in two weeks on the next episode of the LYS podcast.

      ]]>1c3814f3-1299-4adb-b714-26af9d7a3ca7Wed, 22 Apr 2020 09:00:00 -070026:58falsefull165165Lori Lee23-Day Alaskan Wilderness Survival: Interview - Tyson SteeleEpisode 164: 23-Day Alaskan Wilderness Survival: Interview - Tyson Steele

      His last semester of grad school Tiberius Steele lived in his car. When the university revoked all the grad student teaching scholarships he was forced to find a way to continue on with his schooling, but he couldn’t afford rent, so Tyson removed the passenger seat from his tiny Hyundai Accent, built a bed where the seat had been and parked up the canyon at nights. “It was great,” he said, “No rent, fresh mountain air. From that point on I was hooked on the idea of budget, small living.”

      But that’s just the beginning. How do we get from here to surviving in the Alaskan wilderness—in the lowlands south of Denali National Park, for 23 days in below freezing temperatures after his home burnt to the ground, killing his best friend and dog - a lab who had been with him through six years of rough living, and eating from burned out cans of food with melted plastic in them from the fire that decimated all his belongings?

      Tune into the audio program for my interview with Tiberius Steele - mountain man, survivor, poet, hermit, and teacher.

      To follow Tyson on social media:

      Instagram: @homesteadalaska

      You can also find him on YouTube.

      Tyson made his way through very dark days of cold, hunger and deprivation. What was the key? He says it was looking for the beauty around him - focusing on the northern lights, looking a moose in the eyes, noticing the beautiful countryside and singing to himself.

      ]]>Episode 164: 23-Day Alaskan Wilderness Survival: Interview - Tyson Steele

      His last semester of grad school Tiberius Steele lived in his car. When the university revoked all the grad student teaching scholarships he was forced to find a way to continue on with his schooling, but he couldn’t afford rent, so Tyson removed the passenger seat from his tiny Hyundai Accent, built a bed where the seat had been and parked up the canyon at nights. “It was great,” he said, “No rent, fresh mountain air. From that point on I was hooked on the idea of budget, small living.”

      But that’s just the beginning. How do we get from here to surviving in the Alaskan wilderness—in the lowlands south of Denali National Park, for 23 days in below freezing temperatures after his home burnt to the ground, killing his best friend and dog - a lab who had been with him through six years of rough living, and eating from burned out cans of food with melted plastic in them from the fire that decimated all his belongings?

      Tune into the audio program for my interview with Tiberius Steele - mountain man, survivor, poet, hermit, and teacher.

      To follow Tyson on social media:

      Instagram: @homesteadalaska

      You can also find him on YouTube.

      Tyson made his way through very dark days of cold, hunger and deprivation. What was the key? He says it was looking for the beauty around him - focusing on the northern lights, looking a moose in the eyes, noticing the beautiful countryside and singing to himself.

      ]]>d2a0d42e-22d1-4dda-981b-9773cc03dbe8Wed, 08 Apr 2020 09:00:00 -070035:41falsefull164164Lori LeeChallenge #2: Clutter EditedEpisode 163 Challenge #2 Clutter Edited: Interview: Ashley Stuart

       

      Ta Da! Introducing a set of episodes that are going to get into detail on each of the 21 challenges in the book L.I.F.E - Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday - the 21 Life Connection Challenges. In May of 2018 I tackled the first challenge - to do a Random Act of Kindness. It was episode 89. We got a group together who went out and did RAK and then I recorded their experiences for you guys and shared it. Now I’m on to challenge #2. Challenge #2 in the book is about taking a step toward decluttering our spaces - about less is more, and about the incredible importance in this concept. The challenge itself is to start out by getting rid of just 1 unneeded item you have in your house. It’s a stepping stone to a bigger clearing.

      Stay tuned as I start the second in a series of episodes that will delve more deeply into the 21 LIFE connection challenges and we’ll talk about how and why these challenges are going to make your life better.

       

      We call it decluttering, parring down, downsizing, making space, trending toward minimalism, heck…maybe just cleaning house. The trend with the millennials is to own less so they can do more, move faster, have more freedom, save money by needing less space and create a smaller carbon foot print. Every generation has a few signature ideas and those ideas usually flow in the opposite direction of those of their parents. It’s no secret that their parent’s generation is about accumulation. Their grandparents - the Boomers who lived in a time of rationing during the wars, and the natural tendency toward survival —to collect - to make sure you will always have enough. To store up against the needy day. We live in a time of abundance and accumulation is a natural tendency, but now it’s time to manage it. More is not better, and he who dies with the most toys is still dead and he who lives with the most clutter just leaves a lot of shit for other people to sort through.

      “Hording” is a word we hear far too often these days, and as a Realtor who spends lots of days going through houses, I can verify that it’s a real thing. 

      Graham Hill, talking from the TED stage shares some interesting ideas about the state of America and our clutter.

      Tune into the audio program to hear this TED clip.

      In my book L.I.F.E. Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday challenge #2 is to choose at least one unneeded item and get rid of it. It’s that simple. 

      At any given moment there is a good chance we have clutter around us. Maybe it’s the gaggle of water bottles being thrown from side-to-side in the backseat of your car as you turn corners, or the stuff on your kitchen cabinets successfully hiding the surface you could be using to cook and eat on. What about your office, or the garage you can’t actually pull a car into. Often we’ve become so used to our clutter we don’t even see it anymore. So look a little closer.

      Why?

      If you start cleaning up some of this external clutter, you’ll notice that internal clutter disappears as well. This challenge is important on many levels. There is a freeing of energy that takes place when we release our hold on material items. This freeing of energy translates into our mental state in far deeper ways than we even realize. 

      In my late 20’s we sold our home and packed all our belongings into a storage shed so we could travel for a year. Despite being hundreds of miles from my things I can verify there was an energetic tie that always had to my “stuff.” We have a connection to our belongings, a real connection, and this is great - our “things” are there to serve us, help us do what we want and need to do, but too often we forget the part where we let go of them, let them move on to help someone else when they’ve completed their time with us. Instead it’s about what I can control, what I...]]>Episode 163 Challenge #2 Clutter Edited: Interview: Ashley Stuart

       

      Ta Da! Introducing a set of episodes that are going to get into detail on each of the 21 challenges in the book L.I.F.E - Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday - the 21 Life Connection Challenges. In May of 2018 I tackled the first challenge - to do a Random Act of Kindness. It was episode 89. We got a group together who went out and did RAK and then I recorded their experiences for you guys and shared it. Now I’m on to challenge #2. Challenge #2 in the book is about taking a step toward decluttering our spaces - about less is more, and about the incredible importance in this concept. The challenge itself is to start out by getting rid of just 1 unneeded item you have in your house. It’s a stepping stone to a bigger clearing.

      Stay tuned as I start the second in a series of episodes that will delve more deeply into the 21 LIFE connection challenges and we’ll talk about how and why these challenges are going to make your life better.

       

      We call it decluttering, parring down, downsizing, making space, trending toward minimalism, heck…maybe just cleaning house. The trend with the millennials is to own less so they can do more, move faster, have more freedom, save money by needing less space and create a smaller carbon foot print. Every generation has a few signature ideas and those ideas usually flow in the opposite direction of those of their parents. It’s no secret that their parent’s generation is about accumulation. Their grandparents - the Boomers who lived in a time of rationing during the wars, and the natural tendency toward survival —to collect - to make sure you will always have enough. To store up against the needy day. We live in a time of abundance and accumulation is a natural tendency, but now it’s time to manage it. More is not better, and he who dies with the most toys is still dead and he who lives with the most clutter just leaves a lot of shit for other people to sort through.

      “Hording” is a word we hear far too often these days, and as a Realtor who spends lots of days going through houses, I can verify that it’s a real thing. 

      Graham Hill, talking from the TED stage shares some interesting ideas about the state of America and our clutter.

      Tune into the audio program to hear this TED clip.

      In my book L.I.F.E. Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday challenge #2 is to choose at least one unneeded item and get rid of it. It’s that simple. 

      At any given moment there is a good chance we have clutter around us. Maybe it’s the gaggle of water bottles being thrown from side-to-side in the backseat of your car as you turn corners, or the stuff on your kitchen cabinets successfully hiding the surface you could be using to cook and eat on. What about your office, or the garage you can’t actually pull a car into. Often we’ve become so used to our clutter we don’t even see it anymore. So look a little closer.

      Why?

      If you start cleaning up some of this external clutter, you’ll notice that internal clutter disappears as well. This challenge is important on many levels. There is a freeing of energy that takes place when we release our hold on material items. This freeing of energy translates into our mental state in far deeper ways than we even realize. 

      In my late 20’s we sold our home and packed all our belongings into a storage shed so we could travel for a year. Despite being hundreds of miles from my things I can verify there was an energetic tie that always had to my “stuff.” We have a connection to our belongings, a real connection, and this is great - our “things” are there to serve us, help us do what we want and need to do, but too often we forget the part where we let go of them, let them move on to help someone else when they’ve completed their time with us. Instead it’s about what I can control, what I can claim, what I can store up against need.

      Julia Cameron said, “When we clear the physical clutter from our lives, we literally make way for inspiration and good orderly direction to enter.”

      Challenge #2 isn’t just about keeping a tidy home. It’s about taking a step on the path of freeing our energy, our hearts and our minds.

      Let’s talk about an important fact: More stuff does not equate with more happiness.

      I think we collect because we think if we have more choices we will be happier, but the paradox is that the more choices we have the more paralyzed we become. Why does 5 Guys burger place do so well? Could it be because they only have a few choices on their menu? In proving Barry’s research I can verify large menus frustrate me, prolong my decision making, and often leave me with regret. Have you noticed that?

      Swarthmore College psychologist Barry Schwarz, Author of the Paradox of Choice,  said from the TED stage, that the result of too many choices creates - paralysis, reconsidering our choices and opportunity costs, which reduce our happiness. He also points out that it creates an escalation of expectation. Meaning, if we have more choices for things we have higher expectations and less satisfaction.

      If we are collecting, keeping, storing, and hording to create happiness for ourselves, we are on the wrong path. But where to start?

      Here’s a tip from ideas.TED.com. “Have you ever looked in your kitchen cabinets and wondered why you have so many mugs or cups, yet you use so few of them? Pick out the ones that make you the happiest - because some choice IS better than no choice, but too much choice complicates and clutters.

      Let’s talk to a professional:

      Today I have invited a professional organizer - Ashley to hop on a quick interview and talk about a couple things - namely the physical AND mental aspects of getting rid of clutter.

      Ashley spent 15 years as a radio DJ and voice over artist. Four years ago Ashley decided to step out on a limb and turn a talent for organizing into a full time Professional Organizing business, Rethink Clutter, which focuses on the emotional attachments we have to "stuff" and she empowers others to recognize and overcome them. Ashley’s “Organizational Grid” teaches you how to get decluttered, organized, and increase your productivity! She has worked on everything fromEtsy shops and corporate offices, garages and man caves, craft rooms and pantries, and everything in between.

      Everything Ashley does is with the intent to “own her life instead of being owned by stuff!”

      Tune into the audio to hear my interview with Ashley.

      Now you folks out there who have some serious clutter issues may not want to hear this, but it’s a proven fact that people’s emotional upheavals can manifest themselves in how they keep our surroundings. If your surroundings are a little rough, it may be an opportunity to consider what type of mental clutter might need to be unpacked and uncluttered as well. Star Hansen, a professional organizer says, “Clutter is an external demonstration of our internal storms.”

      Let your clutter inform you of your internal state, use it as a way to take stock. And then start the work of letting go - mentally and physically. 

      I hope today’s episode has shed a little light onto the importance of editing our clutter and challenge #2 of the 21 Life Connection Challenges. Please hop on the website and share your comments and experiences under this episode as I’d love to hear your thoughts - loveyourstorypodcast.com

      Thanks and this week’s challenge is to get rid of at least one thing that you don’t love that is cluttering up your closet, your cabinets, your desk or your car. Take a step toward freedom and a cleaner joy.

      See you in two weeks on the next episode of the LYS podcast.

      ]]>912ab7a7-7654-4d9f-b590-aebb4f86b414Wed, 25 Mar 2020 09:00:00 -070037:49falsefull163163Lori LeeEpisode 162: The Mental Edge: How to Perform at our Highest Levels - Interview Jeff MeyerEpisode 162: The Mental Edge: How to Perform at our Highest Levels - Interview Jeff Meyer

      We all do something.

      Are you a parent, a lawyer, an actress, a podcaster, a Realtor, a soccer player, a sales person, a teacher, a socialite?

      Whatever it is YOU do, staying in a space of peak performance is the surest way to find success in being your best YOU. Today I talk with the originator of the Mental Edge, a insulting firm that offers sports and management counseling to athletes - it's all about the science of developing mental toughness and the mental techniques that keep us at our sharpest. Guess what? Some of it is all about the stories we tell ourselves.

      Tune in to the audio program for my interview with Jeff Meyer.

      Jeff has worked with over 2500 clients, from pro athletes, performers, coaches, administrators, and corporations. Jeff is from Colorado and earned his bachelor's degree in Social Psychological Kinesiology. he went on to earn a Masters degree in Pedagogy. Both from the University of Noreen Colorado. Jeff has coached men's basketball for 29 years at Division I, Division II, and high school levels. Jeff is a popular speaker with corporations, universities and athletic teams. He inspires though sand on how they can use mental toughness to be more successful in today's competitive climate.

      To get a hold of Jeff:

      Email: jeffmeyermentaledge@gmail.com

      ]]>Episode 162: The Mental Edge: How to Perform at our Highest Levels - Interview Jeff Meyer

      We all do something.

      Are you a parent, a lawyer, an actress, a podcaster, a Realtor, a soccer player, a sales person, a teacher, a socialite?

      Whatever it is YOU do, staying in a space of peak performance is the surest way to find success in being your best YOU. Today I talk with the originator of the Mental Edge, a insulting firm that offers sports and management counseling to athletes - it's all about the science of developing mental toughness and the mental techniques that keep us at our sharpest. Guess what? Some of it is all about the stories we tell ourselves.

      Tune in to the audio program for my interview with Jeff Meyer.

      Jeff has worked with over 2500 clients, from pro athletes, performers, coaches, administrators, and corporations. Jeff is from Colorado and earned his bachelor's degree in Social Psychological Kinesiology. he went on to earn a Masters degree in Pedagogy. Both from the University of Noreen Colorado. Jeff has coached men's basketball for 29 years at Division I, Division II, and high school levels. Jeff is a popular speaker with corporations, universities and athletic teams. He inspires though sand on how they can use mental toughness to be more successful in today's competitive climate.

      To get a hold of Jeff:

      Email: jeffmeyermentaledge@gmail.com

      ]]>5d2ab220-d369-4a5b-9e2a-b357f6a605bfWed, 11 Mar 2020 09:00:00 -070036:17falsefull162162Lori LeeEpisode 161 The Power of the Human Soul - Interview: Todd SylvesterEpisode 161 The Power of the Human Soul - Interview: Todd Sylvester

      Today let’s gather around the technological campfire and hear the story of Todd Sylvester, addict turned inspiration. How does our hero come to be addicted to drugs and alcohol as a teen and how did he find his way out of that dark hole? What led him to try and help teens and young people not make his same mistakes and instead take hope in who they are?

      Stay tuned. His story is featured in Simon Sinek’s new book, “Find Your Why,” and today we’ll get a sneak peak at HIS why.

      Todd Sylvester learned that the human soul is more powerful than addiction after he beat his own addiction over 25 years ago. In 1989 he founded the non-profit, anti-drug entity Sly Dog “Drug Free That’s Me, which features a sought after education program for elementary schools. This program has encouraged over 100 thousand school-age students while emphasizing principles of positive self-talk (the stories we’re telling ourselves), personal commitment, goal setting and character building. He’s a podcaster, author, speaker and inspiration.

      When I heard you speak at a conference up at the University of Utah last year I loved your 4 Life Changing Principles because they were right up my alley – you were preaching to the preacher, so I want you to share those, but before you do can you tell us your story?

      Tune into the audio program to hear Todd's story - how he got started, what rock bottom looked like, and the little girl that helped pull him out of his hole.

      No one grows up thinking “I want to be an addict when I grow up and lose control over my own choices.” But somehow lots and lots of people end up walking that messy, destructive path. There are lots of things we can get addicted to, and the tragedy with addiction is the way something else takes over our body and our agency. A few months ago I had a friend who fell off the wagon after years of being drug-free. That one decision did serious damage to his career, his bank account, his family relationships, his self respect, and a number of other things he’d been developing in his life. The saying goes, “Once and addict, always an addict,” and so we see the importance of not starting that battle in the first place, or life becomes a constant struggle on and off the wagon. I love Todd’s work because these lessons – the loss and destruction that accompanies addiction, are not ones that we want anyone to have to learn. If we, as people, can be taught, as children, the importance of not stepping anywhere near this path, entire lives can be saved and massive heartache avoided.

      If you feel Todd’s story could warn or help anyone you know, please pass it along to them. If you have a local elementary school where his program could help children, maybe look into it and pass it along.

      To contact Todd:

      @tsinspires

      #beliefcast 

      www.toddsylvesterinspires.com

      As I sign off today I want to shamelessly plug my book: LIFE Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday. The 21 Life Connection Challenges. If you haven’t got your copy, hop on Amazon or the website: loveyourstorypodcast.com and get a copy for you and your family, or your book club or your ladies group. If you make a video of you and your group doing the challenges and send it to me, I’ll send out free Love Your Story t-shirts your way. Send your link to lorijlee@msn.com I’d LOVE to see what you guys are doing out there with the challenges. 

      ]]>Episode 161 The Power of the Human Soul - Interview: Todd Sylvester

      Today let’s gather around the technological campfire and hear the story of Todd Sylvester, addict turned inspiration. How does our hero come to be addicted to drugs and alcohol as a teen and how did he find his way out of that dark hole? What led him to try and help teens and young people not make his same mistakes and instead take hope in who they are?

      Stay tuned. His story is featured in Simon Sinek’s new book, “Find Your Why,” and today we’ll get a sneak peak at HIS why.

      Todd Sylvester learned that the human soul is more powerful than addiction after he beat his own addiction over 25 years ago. In 1989 he founded the non-profit, anti-drug entity Sly Dog “Drug Free That’s Me, which features a sought after education program for elementary schools. This program has encouraged over 100 thousand school-age students while emphasizing principles of positive self-talk (the stories we’re telling ourselves), personal commitment, goal setting and character building. He’s a podcaster, author, speaker and inspiration.

      When I heard you speak at a conference up at the University of Utah last year I loved your 4 Life Changing Principles because they were right up my alley – you were preaching to the preacher, so I want you to share those, but before you do can you tell us your story?

      Tune into the audio program to hear Todd's story - how he got started, what rock bottom looked like, and the little girl that helped pull him out of his hole.

      No one grows up thinking “I want to be an addict when I grow up and lose control over my own choices.” But somehow lots and lots of people end up walking that messy, destructive path. There are lots of things we can get addicted to, and the tragedy with addiction is the way something else takes over our body and our agency. A few months ago I had a friend who fell off the wagon after years of being drug-free. That one decision did serious damage to his career, his bank account, his family relationships, his self respect, and a number of other things he’d been developing in his life. The saying goes, “Once and addict, always an addict,” and so we see the importance of not starting that battle in the first place, or life becomes a constant struggle on and off the wagon. I love Todd’s work because these lessons – the loss and destruction that accompanies addiction, are not ones that we want anyone to have to learn. If we, as people, can be taught, as children, the importance of not stepping anywhere near this path, entire lives can be saved and massive heartache avoided.

      If you feel Todd’s story could warn or help anyone you know, please pass it along to them. If you have a local elementary school where his program could help children, maybe look into it and pass it along.

      To contact Todd:

      @tsinspires

      #beliefcast 

      www.toddsylvesterinspires.com

      As I sign off today I want to shamelessly plug my book: LIFE Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday. The 21 Life Connection Challenges. If you haven’t got your copy, hop on Amazon or the website: loveyourstorypodcast.com and get a copy for you and your family, or your book club or your ladies group. If you make a video of you and your group doing the challenges and send it to me, I’ll send out free Love Your Story t-shirts your way. Send your link to lorijlee@msn.com I’d LOVE to see what you guys are doing out there with the challenges. 

      ]]>b1824d8b-6949-4603-a3b4-14bedf713246Wed, 26 Feb 2020 09:00:00 -070044:54falsefull161161Lori LeeEpisode 160: How Being a Hostage Set Her Mind Free - Interview: Jo Marie TaylorEpisode 160 How Being a Hostage Set Her Mind Free - Interview: Jo Marie Taylor

      There are moments in our lives that change us – become defining moments because they challenge what we thought we knew and make us think about things differently. 

      On 2 August 1990 at 2:00 am, local time, Iraq launched an invasion of Kuwait with four elite Iraqi Republican Guard Division and Iraqi Army Special Forces. The main thrust was conducted by the commandos deployed by helicopters and boats to attack Kuwait City while the other divisions seized the airports and two airbases. Kuwait didn’t stand for long and the Iraqi invasion quickly turned into a take-over.

      JoMarie Taylor, an American, was visiting Kuwait with her Kuwaiti husband found herself a hostage in the country, hiding and navigating the fear and daily threat of death; watching the destruction, rape, murder and mayhem of the invasion – all this challenged the way she thought about life.

      Tune into the audio program for her story as she shares her hostage experience and the change it created in her life story moving forward. Jo’s story is an opening into our own considerations about how our traumatic experiences shape and change us and how that’s part of the messy, beautiful process we call life.

      Raised in Ogden, Utah in the 60’s and 70’s JoMarie came from a mixed faith family life with a Catholic mother and a Latter Day Saint father. She met her husband, a former Moslem at Weber State University and they were married in 1987. In 1990 they moved to Kuwait to visit her in-laws because her father in-law had had issues with his heart and while they were there Iraq invaded. Her parents went for 5 weeks hearing nothing but CNN reports on the invasion and being unable to get a hold of their daughter. Let’s hear the story from Jo.

      Listen to the audio to hear Jo Marie's story.

      To contact Jo Marie:

      jomarietaylor1@yahoo.com

      Pinterest:@healthcoacch.jomarie

      Facebook: Health Coach JoMarie

      Website: www.coachJoMarie.com

      Our life experiences shape us. We hare stretched and refined, pruned and challenged, and in that process we make many choices. We can choose bitterness, cynicism, doubt, victimhood, on and on. We also can choose hope, faith, love, forgiveness, light. I’ve noticed something about older people. Most of them are either grumpy old and bitter, or they are wise, old and enlightened. Some are extreme and of course some lie in between, but it’s easy to see the roll that our chosen stories and focus play in determining who we are and who we become. In my interview with JoMarie we see a woman who, like us all, is shaped by her experiences, and in this case, opened to broader ways of considering life.

      As you consider your own life experiences, especially the ones you still find difficult, shameful, horrifying…consider your interpretation of events and the story you have built around them. Does that story feed fear and anger? If so, how can you reshape that story to serve you and help you find meaning? If you have chosen to find the meaning and learning in your difficult spaces please take a moment and congratulate yourself for such a healing, wise and self-supporting approach. Sometimes we need help to reframe the stories closest to us. If that’s the case, you can reach out to me or listen to earlier podcasts that share the 5 Steps to reframing your story.

      Thanks for being with us today! May you grow and stretch as you write your best life story, knowing that while you can’t always chose what happens to you, you can choose your response to those events.

      Don’t forget to pick up your copy of LIFE – Living Intentional and Fearless everyday – the 21 Life...]]>Episode 160 How Being a Hostage Set Her Mind Free - Interview: Jo Marie Taylor

      There are moments in our lives that change us – become defining moments because they challenge what we thought we knew and make us think about things differently. 

      On 2 August 1990 at 2:00 am, local time, Iraq launched an invasion of Kuwait with four elite Iraqi Republican Guard Division and Iraqi Army Special Forces. The main thrust was conducted by the commandos deployed by helicopters and boats to attack Kuwait City while the other divisions seized the airports and two airbases. Kuwait didn’t stand for long and the Iraqi invasion quickly turned into a take-over.

      JoMarie Taylor, an American, was visiting Kuwait with her Kuwaiti husband found herself a hostage in the country, hiding and navigating the fear and daily threat of death; watching the destruction, rape, murder and mayhem of the invasion – all this challenged the way she thought about life.

      Tune into the audio program for her story as she shares her hostage experience and the change it created in her life story moving forward. Jo’s story is an opening into our own considerations about how our traumatic experiences shape and change us and how that’s part of the messy, beautiful process we call life.

      Raised in Ogden, Utah in the 60’s and 70’s JoMarie came from a mixed faith family life with a Catholic mother and a Latter Day Saint father. She met her husband, a former Moslem at Weber State University and they were married in 1987. In 1990 they moved to Kuwait to visit her in-laws because her father in-law had had issues with his heart and while they were there Iraq invaded. Her parents went for 5 weeks hearing nothing but CNN reports on the invasion and being unable to get a hold of their daughter. Let’s hear the story from Jo.

      Listen to the audio to hear Jo Marie's story.

      To contact Jo Marie:

      jomarietaylor1@yahoo.com

      Pinterest:@healthcoacch.jomarie

      Facebook: Health Coach JoMarie

      Website: www.coachJoMarie.com

      Our life experiences shape us. We hare stretched and refined, pruned and challenged, and in that process we make many choices. We can choose bitterness, cynicism, doubt, victimhood, on and on. We also can choose hope, faith, love, forgiveness, light. I’ve noticed something about older people. Most of them are either grumpy old and bitter, or they are wise, old and enlightened. Some are extreme and of course some lie in between, but it’s easy to see the roll that our chosen stories and focus play in determining who we are and who we become. In my interview with JoMarie we see a woman who, like us all, is shaped by her experiences, and in this case, opened to broader ways of considering life.

      As you consider your own life experiences, especially the ones you still find difficult, shameful, horrifying…consider your interpretation of events and the story you have built around them. Does that story feed fear and anger? If so, how can you reshape that story to serve you and help you find meaning? If you have chosen to find the meaning and learning in your difficult spaces please take a moment and congratulate yourself for such a healing, wise and self-supporting approach. Sometimes we need help to reframe the stories closest to us. If that’s the case, you can reach out to me or listen to earlier podcasts that share the 5 Steps to reframing your story.

      Thanks for being with us today! May you grow and stretch as you write your best life story, knowing that while you can’t always chose what happens to you, you can choose your response to those events.

      Don’t forget to pick up your copy of LIFE – Living Intentional and Fearless everyday – the 21 Life Connection Challenges on Amazon. Share the love.

      See you in two weeks on the LYS podcast. 

      ]]>42b51a2e-a723-4660-bd68-81909857d457Wed, 12 Feb 2020 09:00:00 -070034:44falsefull160160Lori LeeEpisode 159 The Art of Working with the Cards You're Dealt: Interview Erik JensenEpisode 159 The Art of Working with the Cards You're Dealt - Interview: Erik Jensen

      Each of us are dealt a deck of cards, so to speak, when we are born onto this planet. This deck includes where we are born, the family we are born into, the culture, geography, religion, expectations, a certain body, health issues, disabilitites, money or no money. We each get a different set-up. I believe we get the set-up that we need in order to learn the things we need to learn. Whether or not you are of that same mind set, we can’t deny that we all have a different set of circumstances and what we do with those circumstances determines who we are and how we live. We are the creators of our own lives, and like an artist we have a certain amount of clay, paint, or in today’s case, recycled computer keys to work with.

      Erik Jensen is a born artist – He’s also deaf. I met him at the Salt Lake City Arts Festival where he was showing his incredible keyboard keys art creations. It’s hard to explain without graphics, but basically he creates really impressive pictures by coloring and organizing recycled computer keyboard keys into pictures. His art has won several awards since he started in high school, through college and in arts shows and festivals. He graduated from Utah Valley University with a BS in Art Education in 2017. He started doing art with computer keyboard keys in 2013, started doing it as a business in 2017 and and went to being a full-time artist in 2018. He loves spending time with his family and when he finds the time, he even gets on his 36-inch unicycle for exercise! His productive and artistic life is built from his specific deck of cards – a supportive mom and teachers, his artists eye, being deaf and learning how to hear and talk and sign.

      Tune into the audio program to hear the interview with Erik.

      To find him and his art:

      Erik Jensen Art

      Computer Key Artist

      erikjensenart@gmail.com

      https://www.erikjensenart.com

      http://www.facebook.com/erikjensenart

      http://www.instagram.com/erikjensenart

      What is something in your life that you feel like you may have gotten short-changed on? I knew a woman in my church who said she didn’t want to live with her family after this life because they were really awful to her. She felt like she’d been dealt a crappy family. I met a woman recently who was divorced many years ago, and now in her 70’s she is still stuck in the story of how hard life has always been because she is alone. Maybe you grew up in poverty and it felt like it was impossible to get ahead? Maybe you struggle with an illness that stops you from living how you wish you could. At my house we play Monopoly Deal a lot. This is Monopoly with cards. Every hand is of course a different set of assets, chance cards, money and opportunities to create with, but what you do with your cards determines if you win or lose. What is a card you are holding in your metaphorical deck of life cards that you need to find a way to leverage or learn or create something valuable with? Erik had to work with the card in his hand of being deaf. His choice to not let this unchangeable card hold him back has made all the difference. Your challenge this week is to take stock and find a challenging card in your hand and start playing with ideas of learning or leveraging this card into supporting the life you want. Could it be learning from the cards you’ve been dealt? Empathy and understanding gained? In Episode 83 you’ll remember Wendy Garrett who was in an auto/scooter accident where one of her legs was paralyzed, but...]]>Episode 159 The Art of Working with the Cards You're Dealt - Interview: Erik Jensen

      Each of us are dealt a deck of cards, so to speak, when we are born onto this planet. This deck includes where we are born, the family we are born into, the culture, geography, religion, expectations, a certain body, health issues, disabilitites, money or no money. We each get a different set-up. I believe we get the set-up that we need in order to learn the things we need to learn. Whether or not you are of that same mind set, we can’t deny that we all have a different set of circumstances and what we do with those circumstances determines who we are and how we live. We are the creators of our own lives, and like an artist we have a certain amount of clay, paint, or in today’s case, recycled computer keys to work with.

      Erik Jensen is a born artist – He’s also deaf. I met him at the Salt Lake City Arts Festival where he was showing his incredible keyboard keys art creations. It’s hard to explain without graphics, but basically he creates really impressive pictures by coloring and organizing recycled computer keyboard keys into pictures. His art has won several awards since he started in high school, through college and in arts shows and festivals. He graduated from Utah Valley University with a BS in Art Education in 2017. He started doing art with computer keyboard keys in 2013, started doing it as a business in 2017 and and went to being a full-time artist in 2018. He loves spending time with his family and when he finds the time, he even gets on his 36-inch unicycle for exercise! His productive and artistic life is built from his specific deck of cards – a supportive mom and teachers, his artists eye, being deaf and learning how to hear and talk and sign.

      Tune into the audio program to hear the interview with Erik.

      To find him and his art:

      Erik Jensen Art

      Computer Key Artist

      erikjensenart@gmail.com

      https://www.erikjensenart.com

      http://www.facebook.com/erikjensenart

      http://www.instagram.com/erikjensenart

      What is something in your life that you feel like you may have gotten short-changed on? I knew a woman in my church who said she didn’t want to live with her family after this life because they were really awful to her. She felt like she’d been dealt a crappy family. I met a woman recently who was divorced many years ago, and now in her 70’s she is still stuck in the story of how hard life has always been because she is alone. Maybe you grew up in poverty and it felt like it was impossible to get ahead? Maybe you struggle with an illness that stops you from living how you wish you could. At my house we play Monopoly Deal a lot. This is Monopoly with cards. Every hand is of course a different set of assets, chance cards, money and opportunities to create with, but what you do with your cards determines if you win or lose. What is a card you are holding in your metaphorical deck of life cards that you need to find a way to leverage or learn or create something valuable with? Erik had to work with the card in his hand of being deaf. His choice to not let this unchangeable card hold him back has made all the difference. Your challenge this week is to take stock and find a challenging card in your hand and start playing with ideas of learning or leveraging this card into supporting the life you want. Could it be learning from the cards you’ve been dealt? Empathy and understanding gained? In Episode 83 you’ll remember Wendy Garrett who was in an auto/scooter accident where one of her legs was paralyzed, but instead of making a home in victim land she found joy in getting involved in the world’s 7 largest marathons and having experiences she wouldn’t have had any other way. What does your deck look like? How can you find joy and life satisfaction even from the tough cards?

      Share this podcast with someone you love and leave us a review on iTunes or wherever you listen. We’ll see you next week on the Love Your Story podcast.

      ]]>652c7d41-2ec0-44dd-84a0-45367a73843cWed, 29 Jan 2020 09:00:00 -070026:43falsefull159159Lori LeeEpisode 158 A Healthy Relationship to Fear: Interview Kristen UlmerEpisode 158 A Healthy Relationship to Fear: Interview with Kristen Ulmer

      Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Let’s face the fear. 

      Kristen Ulmer is a thought leader on fear and anxiety who draws from her tenure as the most fearless woman extreme skier in the world for 12 years, from intently studying Zen for 16 years, and from facilitating tens of thousands of clients on flow and peak performance.

      The author of: The Art of Fear: Why Conquering Fear Won’t Work and What to Do Instead, she’s known for radially challenges existing norms about what to do about fear and anxiety. Facilitating and speaking all over the world, some of her clients include Google, Citigroup, Olympic athletes, and the US Air Force. Her revolutionary work has also been featured in such media as NPR, The Wall Street Journal, Forbes Magazine, USA Today, Tim Ferriss’s “Tribe of Mentors,” the Megyn Kelly show and many more.

      She’s on the show today to share her story of being a world-class extreme skier and to teach us what she understands about facing and managing fear.

      Tune in to the audio program to hear answers to the following questions and a whole lot more.

      1. Tell us the story of how you got started and extreme skiing and what you did.
      2. How did you become a fear/anxiety expert?
      3. What do you teach that's different from everyone else
      4. What fears do you face today?
      5. Final words of advice

      
      

      To find Kristen: www.kristenulmer.com

      What do YOU fear? What do you do when you fear something? Do you run? Do you hide? Do you face it? Run toward it? 

      Challenge this week is to think about how you are living intentional and fearless everyday and how you can live just a little more fearless. What scary thing can you face this week? What courage muscle can you flex?

      Don’t forget to use the tools on the loveyourstorypodcast.com website. All the 140+ episodes to share, t-shirts to buy, and links to by the book: LIFE Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday, so youc anget you and your family started on 21 fun challenges to creating more connection and possibility in your life.

      See you next week. Share the love.

      ]]>Episode 158 A Healthy Relationship to Fear: Interview with Kristen Ulmer

      Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Let’s face the fear. 

      Kristen Ulmer is a thought leader on fear and anxiety who draws from her tenure as the most fearless woman extreme skier in the world for 12 years, from intently studying Zen for 16 years, and from facilitating tens of thousands of clients on flow and peak performance.

      The author of: The Art of Fear: Why Conquering Fear Won’t Work and What to Do Instead, she’s known for radially challenges existing norms about what to do about fear and anxiety. Facilitating and speaking all over the world, some of her clients include Google, Citigroup, Olympic athletes, and the US Air Force. Her revolutionary work has also been featured in such media as NPR, The Wall Street Journal, Forbes Magazine, USA Today, Tim Ferriss’s “Tribe of Mentors,” the Megyn Kelly show and many more.

      She’s on the show today to share her story of being a world-class extreme skier and to teach us what she understands about facing and managing fear.

      Tune in to the audio program to hear answers to the following questions and a whole lot more.

      1. Tell us the story of how you got started and extreme skiing and what you did.
      2. How did you become a fear/anxiety expert?
      3. What do you teach that's different from everyone else
      4. What fears do you face today?
      5. Final words of advice

      
      

      To find Kristen: www.kristenulmer.com

      What do YOU fear? What do you do when you fear something? Do you run? Do you hide? Do you face it? Run toward it? 

      Challenge this week is to think about how you are living intentional and fearless everyday and how you can live just a little more fearless. What scary thing can you face this week? What courage muscle can you flex?

      Don’t forget to use the tools on the loveyourstorypodcast.com website. All the 140+ episodes to share, t-shirts to buy, and links to by the book: LIFE Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday, so youc anget you and your family started on 21 fun challenges to creating more connection and possibility in your life.

      See you next week. Share the love.

      ]]>44315856-8cf6-432a-88ab-8d292982cf38Wed, 15 Jan 2020 09:00:00 -070031:34falsefull158158Lori LeeEpisode 157 What If Nothing Is Wrong With You?Episode 157 What if Nothing is Wrong with You?

      Happy 2020 my people! I know the new year is all about resolutions and what we can do to improve just a bit, and there’s plenty of time for that, but what do you think of the idea that we are pretty darn impressive just the way we are. What if nothing was wrong with you? I know….what if there really was nothing wrong with you and you just accepted that. How would that settle into your heart? 

      Stay tuned for today’s episode on self love, self acceptance, and the novel idea that we are acceptable here and now, just as we are. In fact we are more than acceptable – we are beloved and filled with magic.

      Since loving ourselves creates the foundation for loving our story – this topic is ideal for the Love Your Story podcast, so I wanted to pose the question to you – What if there is nothing wrong with you?

      I first heard this statement from Susan Henkel’s TED Talk, part of the “How to Be a Better Human” series, so let’s start there…

      Susan Henkels has worked as a psychotherapist for more than 45 years. That means she’s spent decades smiling and nodding, decades handing over tissues at the appropriate moment — and decades hearing people tell her all the things about themselves that need to be fixed.

      One day, as she was listening to a patient take her through the “whole list of what was wrong with her,” says Henkels, “I thought in the middle of this litany, ‘What? There’s actually nothing wrong with her.’”

      From that moment, she realized there is a surprising power to be found in prompting people to ask themselves, “What if there’s nothing wrong with me?”

      She says, This does not mean we’re perfect. For instance, most of us could stand to eat better and sit up straighter. But we can stop spending so much time dwelling on our personal shortcomings and imagining how our lives will be better once we finally — finally! — vanquish them. “We create this whole list of what we think is wrong and then create an entire life around it,” 

      In fact, the attributes we think of as problems can be our strengths. Henkels tells this story in her TedX talk. 

      “What if there’s nothing wrong with you?” is about building the skill of acceptance.  Henkels says this question is about pressing pause on your inner critic and making “a choice to let go of all the ways you’ve made yourself wrong,” as she puts it. 

      Tune into the audio program to hear a clip of this Ted talk.

      As you look at your own level of self love, let’s start with these questions. 1. What if there’s nothing wrong with you? And as you start to categorize that favorite list of short comings – ask yourself – What’s wrong with that? Really…could your perceived weakness really be a strength?

      Let me share a story. I shared this in an earlier podcast, but it applies here so I’ll share it again. Last year I was at a women’s empowerment conference. One of the activities we were doing involved consideration of how who we are and our natural tendencies helps us to fulfill our callings – the things we are here to do. In other words, I am equipped to do what I am here to do. As I personally considered a topic I have often been criticized for and thus I have interpreted it as a weakness – that of being strong willed, determined, and sometimes pushy, it struck me that perhaps I am okay just as I am – perhaps that strength was given to me to accomplish what I need to accomplish. Perhaps I have a warrior goddess energy rather than a healing goddess energy or a sweet, compliant goddess energy because I will have battles I need to fight through, and there is definitely a place for the guardians and warrior goddesses, as much as there is a place for the goddesses of mercy, kindness and a more docile energy. This was the first time this has ever...]]>Episode 157 What if Nothing is Wrong with You?

      Happy 2020 my people! I know the new year is all about resolutions and what we can do to improve just a bit, and there’s plenty of time for that, but what do you think of the idea that we are pretty darn impressive just the way we are. What if nothing was wrong with you? I know….what if there really was nothing wrong with you and you just accepted that. How would that settle into your heart? 

      Stay tuned for today’s episode on self love, self acceptance, and the novel idea that we are acceptable here and now, just as we are. In fact we are more than acceptable – we are beloved and filled with magic.

      Since loving ourselves creates the foundation for loving our story – this topic is ideal for the Love Your Story podcast, so I wanted to pose the question to you – What if there is nothing wrong with you?

      I first heard this statement from Susan Henkel’s TED Talk, part of the “How to Be a Better Human” series, so let’s start there…

      Susan Henkels has worked as a psychotherapist for more than 45 years. That means she’s spent decades smiling and nodding, decades handing over tissues at the appropriate moment — and decades hearing people tell her all the things about themselves that need to be fixed.

      One day, as she was listening to a patient take her through the “whole list of what was wrong with her,” says Henkels, “I thought in the middle of this litany, ‘What? There’s actually nothing wrong with her.’”

      From that moment, she realized there is a surprising power to be found in prompting people to ask themselves, “What if there’s nothing wrong with me?”

      She says, This does not mean we’re perfect. For instance, most of us could stand to eat better and sit up straighter. But we can stop spending so much time dwelling on our personal shortcomings and imagining how our lives will be better once we finally — finally! — vanquish them. “We create this whole list of what we think is wrong and then create an entire life around it,” 

      In fact, the attributes we think of as problems can be our strengths. Henkels tells this story in her TedX talk. 

      “What if there’s nothing wrong with you?” is about building the skill of acceptance.  Henkels says this question is about pressing pause on your inner critic and making “a choice to let go of all the ways you’ve made yourself wrong,” as she puts it. 

      Tune into the audio program to hear a clip of this Ted talk.

      As you look at your own level of self love, let’s start with these questions. 1. What if there’s nothing wrong with you? And as you start to categorize that favorite list of short comings – ask yourself – What’s wrong with that? Really…could your perceived weakness really be a strength?

      Let me share a story. I shared this in an earlier podcast, but it applies here so I’ll share it again. Last year I was at a women’s empowerment conference. One of the activities we were doing involved consideration of how who we are and our natural tendencies helps us to fulfill our callings – the things we are here to do. In other words, I am equipped to do what I am here to do. As I personally considered a topic I have often been criticized for and thus I have interpreted it as a weakness – that of being strong willed, determined, and sometimes pushy, it struck me that perhaps I am okay just as I am – perhaps that strength was given to me to accomplish what I need to accomplish. Perhaps I have a warrior goddess energy rather than a healing goddess energy or a sweet, compliant goddess energy because I will have battles I need to fight through, and there is definitely a place for the guardians and warrior goddesses, as much as there is a place for the goddesses of mercy, kindness and a more docile energy. This was the first time this has ever crossed my mind because it went against a cultural representation created about gender roles in my culture. But I loved it because it made sense and because it fostered a space of self acceptance, and just like the example in the Ted talk – how freeing to see something you have often considered a downfall or weakness and suddenly realize it makes you who you are and allows you to be who you came to be and do what you came to do. And what’s wrong with that?

      In my interview with Emma Houston in episode 129, on fierceness, Emma talks about loving on ourselves. Tune into the audio program to hear this clip.

      Laurann Turner also has some words of wisdom from episode #127 - tune in to hear this clip as well.

      I love to discuss the concepts, but concepts don’t help us much until we implement them into our ways of being. So I always like to discuss ways to take action.

      In my earlier episode #26 with Natalie Burrage, a self-love coach, we discussed the “how” of starting to love ourselves and then talked about a few tips. Tune into the audio program to hear her tips.

      When we say, “Nothing is wrong with me,” we aren’t saying, “I’m perfect.” Rather we walk into a space of self-acceptance. And when we ask “and what’s wrong with that?” we start to question long held perceptions that may be completely off base.

      One of the greatest tools of darkness is to make us feel as if we are not enough, as if we are flawed and broken and can never be good enough or as good as others. This mindset keeps us small and often afraid. We accomplish less, we step out of our comfort zone less, we hide our lights under a bushel for fear they are not bright enough or believing we don’t have a light worth shining. It’s a brilliant plan, really. A plan built on fear of rejection – beginning with our own rejection of ourselves. But as we come to understand the dark tools that don’t serve us, rather attack us at our very core and understand how they keep us small and afraid we can combat them with light, and loving ourselves is where this starts, where we remove the dampening blankets of shame and fear and not-enough and we start to shine. We are all in different places in our levels of accepting ourselves, but we all have a favorite list of things we’ve come to believe are wrong with us, so let’s start with self-acceptance and work from there.

      Your challenge this week comes up the next time your inner critic starts to harp on you – come back with “and what’s wrong with that?” See where that questioning train of thought takes you and add a dose of compassion for your own beautiful soul.

      As you move forward into the new year I’d like to suggest that you grab a copy of the LIFE – Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday – it’s about creating connection and possibility – but also SELF CARE. And we can all use a little more self acceptance, self love, and self care. Grab a copy on Amazon or hit the website – loveyourstorypodcast.com for a link to the Amazon page.

      Happy New Year. Great things lie ahead.

      Thanks to Daryl Chen and Ideas.Ted.Com for the information shared on Henkel’s Ted Talk

      ]]>c18d30e1-a3c2-495b-b075-18f644cacc97Wed, 01 Jan 2020 08:00:00 -070017:07falsefull157157Lori LeeEpisode 156 The Gift of Presence: Interview Rachel ReistEpisode 156 The Gift of Presence: Interview Rachel Reist

      Once upon a time in a land of bounty there lived a woman who knew the difference between a Christmas present and Christmas Presence. She was one of only a few who had slowed down enough to think about the power of being with her people vs. the power of doing things and buying stuff, but the difference it made significantly changed the experiences for all around her, but especially for herself.

      As a woman, she saw herself as the guardian of her family. She had learned through many years of giving away and trying to meet outward expectations, that holding space for her to be herself and for her loved ones to be themselves, created a sacred space… held a space of sacredness for being present in the most important ways.

      She created traditions carefully and on purpose and as those traditions were executed and played out she didn’t rush through them, she stayed fully present and enjoyed each moment, each person, each smile, each shift in energy.

      As she held the space for sacred being she remained fully present to the moment, and this changed all her experiences. She had transformed from harried and rushed with doubts and fears as her carefully planned holiday events unfolded, to a space of presence that was slower, more allowing, and and done with great purpose.

      One day as she opened her home to guests who were arriving for her dinner party, she had to remind herself that being present with her friends who were soon to arrive was more important than having each hor douvre plate perfectly situation and each napkin folded. “People care more about how you make them feel, than they do about the details of a situation,” she rehearsed. She took a deep breath as the door bell rang and as each guest arrived she didn’t hurry them in, she looked in their eyes, she let them know how grateful she was they had arrived, and then after careful connection with each she opened herself to allow things to unfold as they would, whether or not the night met her expectations. For things seldom unfolded as one expected. Tonight was no exception. As the party closed down they hadn’t had enough time to do the gift exchange at the end of the night – change of plans, people would just take a gift on their way out the door. Jamie, her friend’s husband had spilled a drink on the living room carpet, and Casandra, her friend from work, had gotten into it with one of the other guests, but holding space for each of her beloved friends and being present rather than embarrassed, rushed, or disappointed allowed her to thoroughly enjoy the evening exactly as it played out. As she raised her glass in a final toast she reminded them that this dinner party had been her gift to them for the season and that rather than a present she was so grateful for the gift of their presence in her home.

      What might the gift of presence look like in your life? How might being present and intentional about each thing you do this holiday season change your experience into a sacred space rather than a harried space?

      Today I have a guest – Rachel Reist here, who is is a licensed clinical social worker and a Qualified Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction instructor, trained through the Center for Mindfulness in Medicine, Healthcare, and Society at the University of Massachusetts Medical School. Her career has been devoted to working with children, adolescents, and families and she currently works at the Davis Mindfulness Center.

      I want to talk about some of the principles illustrated in the story I just told – things like being vs. doing and simplifying, and the power of attunement in our personal relationships. How do we hold space for ourselves and each other?

      Tune in to the audio program to hear my discussion with Rachel about being vs. doing, slowing down, and the greatest gift we can give to others and...]]>Episode 156 The Gift of Presence: Interview Rachel Reist

      Once upon a time in a land of bounty there lived a woman who knew the difference between a Christmas present and Christmas Presence. She was one of only a few who had slowed down enough to think about the power of being with her people vs. the power of doing things and buying stuff, but the difference it made significantly changed the experiences for all around her, but especially for herself.

      As a woman, she saw herself as the guardian of her family. She had learned through many years of giving away and trying to meet outward expectations, that holding space for her to be herself and for her loved ones to be themselves, created a sacred space… held a space of sacredness for being present in the most important ways.

      She created traditions carefully and on purpose and as those traditions were executed and played out she didn’t rush through them, she stayed fully present and enjoyed each moment, each person, each smile, each shift in energy.

      As she held the space for sacred being she remained fully present to the moment, and this changed all her experiences. She had transformed from harried and rushed with doubts and fears as her carefully planned holiday events unfolded, to a space of presence that was slower, more allowing, and and done with great purpose.

      One day as she opened her home to guests who were arriving for her dinner party, she had to remind herself that being present with her friends who were soon to arrive was more important than having each hor douvre plate perfectly situation and each napkin folded. “People care more about how you make them feel, than they do about the details of a situation,” she rehearsed. She took a deep breath as the door bell rang and as each guest arrived she didn’t hurry them in, she looked in their eyes, she let them know how grateful she was they had arrived, and then after careful connection with each she opened herself to allow things to unfold as they would, whether or not the night met her expectations. For things seldom unfolded as one expected. Tonight was no exception. As the party closed down they hadn’t had enough time to do the gift exchange at the end of the night – change of plans, people would just take a gift on their way out the door. Jamie, her friend’s husband had spilled a drink on the living room carpet, and Casandra, her friend from work, had gotten into it with one of the other guests, but holding space for each of her beloved friends and being present rather than embarrassed, rushed, or disappointed allowed her to thoroughly enjoy the evening exactly as it played out. As she raised her glass in a final toast she reminded them that this dinner party had been her gift to them for the season and that rather than a present she was so grateful for the gift of their presence in her home.

      What might the gift of presence look like in your life? How might being present and intentional about each thing you do this holiday season change your experience into a sacred space rather than a harried space?

      Today I have a guest – Rachel Reist here, who is is a licensed clinical social worker and a Qualified Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction instructor, trained through the Center for Mindfulness in Medicine, Healthcare, and Society at the University of Massachusetts Medical School. Her career has been devoted to working with children, adolescents, and families and she currently works at the Davis Mindfulness Center.

      I want to talk about some of the principles illustrated in the story I just told – things like being vs. doing and simplifying, and the power of attunement in our personal relationships. How do we hold space for ourselves and each other?

      Tune in to the audio program to hear my discussion with Rachel about being vs. doing, slowing down, and the greatest gift we can give to others and ourselves.

      My wish for you this holiday season is that you will create exactly what you want. That you will have the rich moments with the people you care for and that you will be able to give things of true value – your presence, your love, and memories you’ll all cherish. Be your celebrations large or small – remember the simplifying – when we are purposeful and present we change the nature of the experience. Create your best Christmas story this year.

      Don’t forget to pick up copies of my book: LIVE Living Intentional and Fearless Every day for everyone on your gift list who is a seeker for better living. For everyone who needs a little more connection, possibility and self-care in their lives. Easiest shopping ever. Just grab it on Amazon and have it delivered right to your door. It’s also a fabulous, intentional gift to start a group or a family project to do all the 21 Challenges together and share the journey of filling your lives with good things.

       

      Loveyourstorypodcast.com has all our past episodes, you can shop for the LYS t-shirt or there is a link to Amazon to get your copy of the book.

       

      Have a wonderful holiday my friends. I’ll see you on the first Wednesday of the new year.

       

      ]]>75c226ad-d7e3-4499-be3d-6682ab7dddadWed, 18 Dec 2019 09:00:00 -070031:33falsefull156156Lori LeeEpisode 155 The Power of Flaws – Interview with Chantel SoumisEpisode 155 The Power of Flaws - Interview with Chantel Soumis

       

      Augusten Burroughts said, “I, myself, am made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions.”

      I love this quote because it is a simple statement of our beautiful individuality and the normalness of our unique qualities. Whether we would really actually call these things flaws, sometimes when they don’t align with societal expectation, they feel like flaws.

      For example, today’s guest is an advocate for the differently-abled community. Her own diagnosis of debilitating multiple sclerosis and her inability to get work after this diagnosis spurred her to fight for a broader more open view of our differences, handicaps, and challenges. Stay tuned for a discussion on the power of individuality and how flaws make us unique, beautiful and indispensable.

      Chantel Soumis a top LinkedIn Creator with over 30k organic followers in one year. Chantel is also the Founder and Creative Director of Stardust Creative LLC, a brand agency focused on embracing differences through personal and corporate branding. She’s spoken at VidCon as one of the first LinkedIn video creators as well as at international conferences in LA, London, Dallas, and more.

      As an advocate for the differently-abled community, Chantel spreads awareness, hope, and inspiration to those around the world fighting for acceptance by sharing the hidden struggles of differently-abled community. By administering an attitude of gratitude, Chantel has overcome severe obstacles and spends a substantial portion of her time coaching others to accept and believe in themselves, and to treat one another with dignity and value, recognizing we are all brothers and sisters of the human race.

      Tune into the audio program to hear Chantel's story and our discussion on how our flaws make us unique and beautiful.

      Sarah Vowell, in her book, Take the Cannoli, said, “We are flawed creatures, all of us. Some of us think that means we should fix our flaws. But get rid of my flaws and there would be no one left.”

      In an earlier episode, I shared an insight I gained at a conference this past year – it was that the things I had often acknowledged as flaws within myself were actually exactly who and how I was supposed to be to do what I came her to do. It was a new idea and it was fresh and full of self-acceptance.

      I am a firm believer in the beauty of the diverse and varied. It is these colors and textures in each of us that make us who we are and help us do what we want and need to do.

      Your challenge this week is to take one of those things you feel is a flaw about you and to reframe it. Find a statement that celebrates your differences – an affirmation that starts to help you see that supposed flaw as something that is actually helping you be who you need to be and do what you need to do. Embrace and love your own quirky self, whatever that looks like. And remember, most people are very unaware of others flaws, they are too worried about their own.

      Let any self-criticism go and start with self-acceptance.

      Don’t forget to use the Love Your Story website – all 150+episodes are available to listen to and share. You can buy your love your story t-shirts, or get the link for my book: LIFE Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday – the 21 LIFE connection challenges.

      Have a great week taking another step toward self-love and the story YOU want to live. See you in a couple of weeks.

      ]]>Episode 155 The Power of Flaws - Interview with Chantel Soumis

       

      Augusten Burroughts said, “I, myself, am made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions.”

      I love this quote because it is a simple statement of our beautiful individuality and the normalness of our unique qualities. Whether we would really actually call these things flaws, sometimes when they don’t align with societal expectation, they feel like flaws.

      For example, today’s guest is an advocate for the differently-abled community. Her own diagnosis of debilitating multiple sclerosis and her inability to get work after this diagnosis spurred her to fight for a broader more open view of our differences, handicaps, and challenges. Stay tuned for a discussion on the power of individuality and how flaws make us unique, beautiful and indispensable.

      Chantel Soumis a top LinkedIn Creator with over 30k organic followers in one year. Chantel is also the Founder and Creative Director of Stardust Creative LLC, a brand agency focused on embracing differences through personal and corporate branding. She’s spoken at VidCon as one of the first LinkedIn video creators as well as at international conferences in LA, London, Dallas, and more.

      As an advocate for the differently-abled community, Chantel spreads awareness, hope, and inspiration to those around the world fighting for acceptance by sharing the hidden struggles of differently-abled community. By administering an attitude of gratitude, Chantel has overcome severe obstacles and spends a substantial portion of her time coaching others to accept and believe in themselves, and to treat one another with dignity and value, recognizing we are all brothers and sisters of the human race.

      Tune into the audio program to hear Chantel's story and our discussion on how our flaws make us unique and beautiful.

      Sarah Vowell, in her book, Take the Cannoli, said, “We are flawed creatures, all of us. Some of us think that means we should fix our flaws. But get rid of my flaws and there would be no one left.”

      In an earlier episode, I shared an insight I gained at a conference this past year – it was that the things I had often acknowledged as flaws within myself were actually exactly who and how I was supposed to be to do what I came her to do. It was a new idea and it was fresh and full of self-acceptance.

      I am a firm believer in the beauty of the diverse and varied. It is these colors and textures in each of us that make us who we are and help us do what we want and need to do.

      Your challenge this week is to take one of those things you feel is a flaw about you and to reframe it. Find a statement that celebrates your differences – an affirmation that starts to help you see that supposed flaw as something that is actually helping you be who you need to be and do what you need to do. Embrace and love your own quirky self, whatever that looks like. And remember, most people are very unaware of others flaws, they are too worried about their own.

      Let any self-criticism go and start with self-acceptance.

      Don’t forget to use the Love Your Story website – all 150+episodes are available to listen to and share. You can buy your love your story t-shirts, or get the link for my book: LIFE Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday – the 21 LIFE connection challenges.

      Have a great week taking another step toward self-love and the story YOU want to live. See you in a couple of weeks.

      ]]>7947babb-bdb2-4f99-830c-831b6760cbfdWed, 04 Dec 2019 09:00:00 -070040:59falsefull155155Lori LeeEpisode 154: 2nd Annual Stories of Appreciation: Giving ThanksEpisode 154: 2nd Annual Stories of Appreciation: Giving Thanks

      Ralph Marston, the author of the Daily Motivator, said, “Make it a habit to tell people thank you. To express your appreciation, sincerely and without the expectation of anything in return. Truly appreciate those around you, and you’ll soon find many others around you. Truly appreciate life, and you’ll find that you have more of it.”

      I love his quotes – they are always so wise, and today his quote is going to usher in four stories of people who took the 2nd Annual Appreciation Challenge.

      
      

      What is the appreciation challenge? Last year in episode 62  we had the 1st Stories of Appreciation episode where I asked specific people to identify someone in their lives who was under-appreciated and to show them profound appreciation, and then to share with us the experience.  Stay tuned to hear the four stories and get ideas for how to plant these seeds in your own life.

      
      

      I have found that there is one thing everyone craves, and that’s appreciation. When we lavish it we create love, increased self-worth and simple satisfaction. We generate healthier relationships and we plant seeds for a harvest of even more good results from those to whom we have shown appreciation.

      
      

      A person who feels appreciated will always do more than what is expected.

      
      

      William James, well-known psychologist and philosopher, said, “The deepest principle of human nature is a craving to be appreciated.”

      
      

      We all want and need to feel valued for who we are and we love being recognized for our contributions and accomplishments. It’s important for us to know that we have made a difference in the world and to the people around us. When a person takes the time to express real appreciation for something we have done it builds our self-confidence, but more importantly it helps us know we are seen, our efforts have been accepted, and it empowers us. More often than not a simple appreciation also infuses an energy and motivation to work harder and do more. It’s powerful stuff. So, let’s hop in and hear about the experiences people had in going out of their way to show appreciation.

      
      

      Tune into the audio program to hear the stories from our participants.

      
      

      I extend this same challenge to you. Think about someone in your life who is often under-appreciated and go out of your way to show them appreciation today. This way of building connection in your life is powerful! Share the love and appreciation, people. It’s a small and simple thing that makes the world and your relationships sooo much richer.

      
      

      Happy Thanksgiving

      
      

      Enjoy the abundance in your life and in your relationships. Create more abundance by planting these seeds for your own rich harvest. Thanks for loving Love Your Story.

      
      

      Remember the website www.loveyourstorypodcast.com has all the episodes – these are also great for sharing. It’s easy to share a link and send someone an episode you think they’d enjoy. You can also buy your copy of LIFE Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday. It’s the perfect Christmas gift for all the people in your life who are seekers and want to create more connection, self-care and possibility in their lives. Easy to get off Amazon and fun to give. I’ll see you in a few weeks on the next episode of the Love Your Story podcast.

      ]]>Episode 154: 2nd Annual Stories of Appreciation: Giving Thanks

      Ralph Marston, the author of the Daily Motivator, said, “Make it a habit to tell people thank you. To express your appreciation, sincerely and without the expectation of anything in return. Truly appreciate those around you, and you’ll soon find many others around you. Truly appreciate life, and you’ll find that you have more of it.”

      I love his quotes – they are always so wise, and today his quote is going to usher in four stories of people who took the 2nd Annual Appreciation Challenge.

      
      

      What is the appreciation challenge? Last year in episode 62  we had the 1st Stories of Appreciation episode where I asked specific people to identify someone in their lives who was under-appreciated and to show them profound appreciation, and then to share with us the experience.  Stay tuned to hear the four stories and get ideas for how to plant these seeds in your own life.

      
      

      I have found that there is one thing everyone craves, and that’s appreciation. When we lavish it we create love, increased self-worth and simple satisfaction. We generate healthier relationships and we plant seeds for a harvest of even more good results from those to whom we have shown appreciation.

      
      

      A person who feels appreciated will always do more than what is expected.

      
      

      William James, well-known psychologist and philosopher, said, “The deepest principle of human nature is a craving to be appreciated.”

      
      

      We all want and need to feel valued for who we are and we love being recognized for our contributions and accomplishments. It’s important for us to know that we have made a difference in the world and to the people around us. When a person takes the time to express real appreciation for something we have done it builds our self-confidence, but more importantly it helps us know we are seen, our efforts have been accepted, and it empowers us. More often than not a simple appreciation also infuses an energy and motivation to work harder and do more. It’s powerful stuff. So, let’s hop in and hear about the experiences people had in going out of their way to show appreciation.

      
      

      Tune into the audio program to hear the stories from our participants.

      
      

      I extend this same challenge to you. Think about someone in your life who is often under-appreciated and go out of your way to show them appreciation today. This way of building connection in your life is powerful! Share the love and appreciation, people. It’s a small and simple thing that makes the world and your relationships sooo much richer.

      
      

      Happy Thanksgiving

      
      

      Enjoy the abundance in your life and in your relationships. Create more abundance by planting these seeds for your own rich harvest. Thanks for loving Love Your Story.

      
      

      Remember the website www.loveyourstorypodcast.com has all the episodes – these are also great for sharing. It’s easy to share a link and send someone an episode you think they’d enjoy. You can also buy your copy of LIFE Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday. It’s the perfect Christmas gift for all the people in your life who are seekers and want to create more connection, self-care and possibility in their lives. Easy to get off Amazon and fun to give. I’ll see you in a few weeks on the next episode of the Love Your Story podcast.

      ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4262Wed, 20 Nov 2019 09:00:00 -070020:55falsefull154154What is the appreciation challenge? Last year in episode 62 we had the 1st Stories of Appreciation episode where I asked specific people to identify someone in their lives who was under-appreciated and to show them profound appreciation, and then to share with us the experience. Stay tuned to hear the four stories and get ideas for how to plant these seeds in your own life.Lori LeeEpisode 153 Climb Every Mountain: the quest to do hard things – Interview David RoskellyEpisode 153 Climb Every Mountain: the quest to do hard things – Interview David Roskelly

       

      Sitting atop the world at 29,029 feet elevation is not something everyone has on their bucket list, but David Roskelley had a whole lot more than just that day in 2013 on top of Everest. He also summited the other 8 highest peaks on the 7 continents. Math not adding up….I’ll let him explain that one to you, but suffice it to say, this incredible athlete and regular everyday guy, loves to do hard things and is here today to share why we can do hard things too. Join me for my discussion with David Roskelley the first American to climb the nine highest peaks on seven continents and the world’s tallest volcanoes on each of the 7 continents. I’m loving his story.

      
      

      David Roskelley is a partner in an environmental engineering firm called R&R Environmental, Inc., and teaches public health at the University of Utah’s Rocky Mountain Center for Occupational and Environmental Health as an adjunct professor. The Utah resident is clearly an avid mountaineer who has his next goals set on the moon – literally. And that’s a whole other story.

      
      

      Tune into the audio program to hear about David’s adventures.

      
      

      David said,

      
      

      “Many people ask why I chose to set the “Seven Summits” as a goal.  The answers are not exactly simple and I’m not 100% certain myself.  However, I love to do difficult things and would encourage anyone reading this post to set a difficult goal and work toward it.  Otherwise, we tend to float through life rudderless (“take control and set a goal” I say).  Recently, I’ve been reading a book by Edward Whymper, Scrambles in the Alps (1871) where he discusses “patient, difficult, laborious toil” in the mountains and how it helps us “come back to our daily occupations better fitted to fight the battle of life and overcome impediments which obstruct our paths, strengthen and cheered by the recollection of past labors”.  For me, it’s easier to contend with traffic, email, commuting, phone calls, constant work obligations, etc. after completing something very difficult.  I just focus on the accomplishment and everything else pales in comparison.

      
      

      Don’t think everyone’s “difficult” is the same and don’t feel you have to climb big mountains or run marathons to accomplish something.  Everyone’s challenges are different and for some it would be easier to walk across Asia than to speak in public or get married or finish their education.”

      
      

      What hard thing are you working on in your life? As we discussed in the beginning of this podcast – everyone’s difficult is something different. I’d like to remind you that the difficult you are in today is giving you the strength that you will need to be who you are supposed to be. As the ever-popular phrase goes, “You can do hard things.” We say this because sometimes we need the reminder that we are powerful, courageous and so far our track record for making it through hard things is 100%, and that’s a pretty darn good rate of success.

      
      

      Your challenge this week is to consider if you need to set a goal – something big and wonderful that feels hard and scary. If you do – take a deep breath, embrace the vision of it happening, and then write that puppy down. Because YOU can do hard things.

      
      

      Thanks for being with us today. Remember loveyourstorypodcast.com for access to all past episodes, to buy your t-shirt, and the link to buy my new, fun book: LIFE Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday. Join the fun trend of embarking on these life enhancing daily challenges – there are 21 of them in the book. You can also find it on Amazon!

      
      

      If you’re part of the crowd that has jumped on the 21 Life Connection Challenges in my book – I’d love to hear about your experiences. Drop me a]]>Episode 153 Climb Every Mountain: the quest to do hard things – Interview David Roskelly

       

      Sitting atop the world at 29,029 feet elevation is not something everyone has on their bucket list, but David Roskelley had a whole lot more than just that day in 2013 on top of Everest. He also summited the other 8 highest peaks on the 7 continents. Math not adding up….I’ll let him explain that one to you, but suffice it to say, this incredible athlete and regular everyday guy, loves to do hard things and is here today to share why we can do hard things too. Join me for my discussion with David Roskelley the first American to climb the nine highest peaks on seven continents and the world’s tallest volcanoes on each of the 7 continents. I’m loving his story.

      
      

      David Roskelley is a partner in an environmental engineering firm called R&R Environmental, Inc., and teaches public health at the University of Utah’s Rocky Mountain Center for Occupational and Environmental Health as an adjunct professor. The Utah resident is clearly an avid mountaineer who has his next goals set on the moon – literally. And that’s a whole other story.

      
      

      Tune into the audio program to hear about David’s adventures.

      
      

      David said,

      
      

      “Many people ask why I chose to set the “Seven Summits” as a goal.  The answers are not exactly simple and I’m not 100% certain myself.  However, I love to do difficult things and would encourage anyone reading this post to set a difficult goal and work toward it.  Otherwise, we tend to float through life rudderless (“take control and set a goal” I say).  Recently, I’ve been reading a book by Edward Whymper, Scrambles in the Alps (1871) where he discusses “patient, difficult, laborious toil” in the mountains and how it helps us “come back to our daily occupations better fitted to fight the battle of life and overcome impediments which obstruct our paths, strengthen and cheered by the recollection of past labors”.  For me, it’s easier to contend with traffic, email, commuting, phone calls, constant work obligations, etc. after completing something very difficult.  I just focus on the accomplishment and everything else pales in comparison.

      
      

      Don’t think everyone’s “difficult” is the same and don’t feel you have to climb big mountains or run marathons to accomplish something.  Everyone’s challenges are different and for some it would be easier to walk across Asia than to speak in public or get married or finish their education.”

      
      

      What hard thing are you working on in your life? As we discussed in the beginning of this podcast – everyone’s difficult is something different. I’d like to remind you that the difficult you are in today is giving you the strength that you will need to be who you are supposed to be. As the ever-popular phrase goes, “You can do hard things.” We say this because sometimes we need the reminder that we are powerful, courageous and so far our track record for making it through hard things is 100%, and that’s a pretty darn good rate of success.

      
      

      Your challenge this week is to consider if you need to set a goal – something big and wonderful that feels hard and scary. If you do – take a deep breath, embrace the vision of it happening, and then write that puppy down. Because YOU can do hard things.

      
      

      Thanks for being with us today. Remember loveyourstorypodcast.com for access to all past episodes, to buy your t-shirt, and the link to buy my new, fun book: LIFE Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday. Join the fun trend of embarking on these life enhancing daily challenges – there are 21 of them in the book. You can also find it on Amazon!

      
      

      If you’re part of the crowd that has jumped on the 21 Life Connection Challenges in my book – I’d love to hear about your experiences. Drop me a line on the website or on FB.

      ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4259Wed, 06 Nov 2019 09:00:00 -070038:59falsefull153153Sitting atop the world at 29,029 feet elevation is not something everyone has on their bucket list, but David Roskelley had a whole lot more than just that day in 2013 on top of Everest. He also summited the other 8 highest peaks on the 7 continents, as well as the 7 highest volcanoes. Tune in for our talk about doing hard things.Lori LeeEpisode 152 What Do You Love About YOUR Life Story?Episode 152 What Do You Love About YOUR Life Story?

      Welcome back to the Love Your Story Podcast. Today we are talking about what you love about your life story. I walked the streets, with microphone in hand, of Salt Lake City, Utah to find out what people love about their life story.

      Today I want you to think about what you love about your life story. Today we celebrate the things that are going right. The seeds you’ve planted that have born good fruit. What seeds have you sown and what fruit have you harvested? Ponder on that, but stay tuned to hear what people on the streets said when I put the microphone to them.

      At the most basic level of the Love Your Story movement we talk about how we are responsible for creating our best life stories on purpose – because we can. We celebrate the law of the harvest. We don’t get apricots because we plant lettuce. Your life looks the way it does because of your thoughts, your words, your actions. If you’re getting lettuce and you want apricots well, plant apricot seeds, but if you love it, pat yourself on the back and celebrate the things you love because you have also created those – planted those seeds.

      Tune into the audio program to hear what people on the street had to say. It’s grand.

      Thanks for tuning in. I love almost everything about my life. That doesn’t mean that I don’t have goals or want more of this and that. But I love my home and yard with all it’s big, green trees; I love my children, my family, my job, my friends, my car, my dog and the good, good people in my life who are my friends. I love the magic I see pop up in my life every day. I love summer heat and the abundance I’m blessed with. I love my podcast and the people I meet on my podcast. I love my community and the people in my tribe. Thank you to all of you who make my life so wonderful.

      Blessings to you and good job for all the wonderful things you have created in your life story. Keep up the good work!! Keep planting and nourishing the seeds you wish to harvest.

       

      ]]>Episode 152 What Do You Love About YOUR Life Story?

      Welcome back to the Love Your Story Podcast. Today we are talking about what you love about your life story. I walked the streets, with microphone in hand, of Salt Lake City, Utah to find out what people love about their life story.

      Today I want you to think about what you love about your life story. Today we celebrate the things that are going right. The seeds you’ve planted that have born good fruit. What seeds have you sown and what fruit have you harvested? Ponder on that, but stay tuned to hear what people on the streets said when I put the microphone to them.

      At the most basic level of the Love Your Story movement we talk about how we are responsible for creating our best life stories on purpose – because we can. We celebrate the law of the harvest. We don’t get apricots because we plant lettuce. Your life looks the way it does because of your thoughts, your words, your actions. If you’re getting lettuce and you want apricots well, plant apricot seeds, but if you love it, pat yourself on the back and celebrate the things you love because you have also created those – planted those seeds.

      Tune into the audio program to hear what people on the street had to say. It’s grand.

      Thanks for tuning in. I love almost everything about my life. That doesn’t mean that I don’t have goals or want more of this and that. But I love my home and yard with all it’s big, green trees; I love my children, my family, my job, my friends, my car, my dog and the good, good people in my life who are my friends. I love the magic I see pop up in my life every day. I love summer heat and the abundance I’m blessed with. I love my podcast and the people I meet on my podcast. I love my community and the people in my tribe. Thank you to all of you who make my life so wonderful.

      Blessings to you and good job for all the wonderful things you have created in your life story. Keep up the good work!! Keep planting and nourishing the seeds you wish to harvest.

       

      ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4246Wed, 23 Oct 2019 09:00:54 -070021:17falsefullEpisode 152 What Do You Love About YOUR Life Story? Welcome back to the Love Your Story Podcast. Today we are talking about what you love about your life story. I walked the streets, with microphone in hand, of Salt Lake City, Utah to find out what people love about their life story. Today I…Lori LeeEpisode 151 Finding Your Way to Healing: Interview Bethany WallaceEpisode 151 Finding Your Way to Healing: Interview Bethany Wallace

      As we share stories around the technological campfire sometimes it seems the main tale is about the character who causes the harm and their path to destruction or learning. But there is also the other side of the story. The story of the victims, those affected by the poor choices of others. Today’s guest had an alcoholic father, two alcoholic husbands, and survived multiple sexual assaults and exploitations before the age of 20.

      Stay tuned as we hear Bethany’s story of triumph as we see proof of a 12-step recovery program giving her the strength and insight to overcome, forgive, learn and take action.

      Bethany Wallace is proof that 12-step recovery programs work if we’re willing to do the work. She has spent the past 12 years taking actions, often in spite of her feelings, to become a healthier person. She enjoys life with her husband and daughter in the Ozarks. Bethany loves working with others in recovery, advocating for sexual assault victims and survivors, writing, and hiking. Bethany also owns a communications consulting business and partners with mission-minded organizations and companies to improve soft skills and to build better workplaces.

      Tune into the audio program to hear Bethany’s story and how we all have different paths to healing.

      Support groups or counseling can benefit family members affected by someone else’s alcohol abuse. Alcohol abuse and alcoholism can have devastating impacts on families. Spouses of people with alcohol problems may be at an increased risk for emotional or physical abuse. If you fall into this category, know that you can find support for your own healing as your story unfolds with this battle.

      As the hero of our stories we seldom pick the antagonists, the dragons, the Darth Vadars that will show up in our lives to teach us and challenge us. But once we embark on the battle it is the wise soul who looks for resources to aid them in their fight to overcome the dark and rise again into the light.

      Your challenge this week is to find resources to help you with whatever your fight is. There are groups, programs, coaches, mentors, doctors, authors…resources to help and guide us. I hope this podcast is one of those, but use everything you can find for your particular battle. This week seek out one.

      Don’t forget to use the Love Your Story website – all 150+episodes are available to listen to and share. You can buy your love your story t-shirts, or get the link for my book: LIFE Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday – the 21 LIFE connection challenges.

      Have a great week taking another step toward self-love and the story YOU want to live. See you in a couple of weeks.

       

       

      ]]>Episode 151 Finding Your Way to Healing: Interview Bethany Wallace

      As we share stories around the technological campfire sometimes it seems the main tale is about the character who causes the harm and their path to destruction or learning. But there is also the other side of the story. The story of the victims, those affected by the poor choices of others. Today’s guest had an alcoholic father, two alcoholic husbands, and survived multiple sexual assaults and exploitations before the age of 20.

      Stay tuned as we hear Bethany’s story of triumph as we see proof of a 12-step recovery program giving her the strength and insight to overcome, forgive, learn and take action.

      Bethany Wallace is proof that 12-step recovery programs work if we’re willing to do the work. She has spent the past 12 years taking actions, often in spite of her feelings, to become a healthier person. She enjoys life with her husband and daughter in the Ozarks. Bethany loves working with others in recovery, advocating for sexual assault victims and survivors, writing, and hiking. Bethany also owns a communications consulting business and partners with mission-minded organizations and companies to improve soft skills and to build better workplaces.

      Tune into the audio program to hear Bethany’s story and how we all have different paths to healing.

      Support groups or counseling can benefit family members affected by someone else’s alcohol abuse. Alcohol abuse and alcoholism can have devastating impacts on families. Spouses of people with alcohol problems may be at an increased risk for emotional or physical abuse. If you fall into this category, know that you can find support for your own healing as your story unfolds with this battle.

      As the hero of our stories we seldom pick the antagonists, the dragons, the Darth Vadars that will show up in our lives to teach us and challenge us. But once we embark on the battle it is the wise soul who looks for resources to aid them in their fight to overcome the dark and rise again into the light.

      Your challenge this week is to find resources to help you with whatever your fight is. There are groups, programs, coaches, mentors, doctors, authors…resources to help and guide us. I hope this podcast is one of those, but use everything you can find for your particular battle. This week seek out one.

      Don’t forget to use the Love Your Story website – all 150+episodes are available to listen to and share. You can buy your love your story t-shirts, or get the link for my book: LIFE Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday – the 21 LIFE connection challenges.

      Have a great week taking another step toward self-love and the story YOU want to live. See you in a couple of weeks.

       

       

      ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4242Wed, 09 Oct 2019 09:00:40 -070045:43falsefullAs we share stories around the technological campfire sometimes it seems the main tale is about the character who causes the harm and their path to destruction or learning. But there is also the other side of the story. The story of the victims, those affected by the poor choices of others. Today’s guest had an alcoholic father, two alcoholic husbands, and survived multiple sexual assaults and exploitations before the age of 20. Stay tuned as we hear Bethany’s story of triumph and her path to healing - a 12-step recovery program giving her the strength and insight to overcome, forgive, learn and take action. Her path to healing and mine were different, but we are celebrating and discussing how our paths to healing are different for everyone. Your path will come if you are open to it.Lori LeeEpisode 150: The Happiness Guru Is In: Interview with Andy ProctorEpisode 150: The Happiness Guru Is In:

      Interview with Andy Proctor

      Who doesn’t want to be happy? When you ask someone what they want in life, the most common answer is “to be happy.” Often the idea of happiness is considered one of chance, luck, or the blessed, but the truth is that your happiness depends only upon the story you create in your own mind about your life. Today’s guest is a certified positive psychology practitioner who has been teaching the science of human flourishing to mass media audiences for the past 5 years. He is the host of the More Happy Life podcast and has been featured in The New York Times, ABC News, Fox Business and many other national publications. He is currently on the board of TEDxBYU and is the director of the 1000 Words speaker series.

      Stay tuned for a 5 Tools for creating your own happiness and Andy Proctor’s story of how he found his way to the happiness path.

       

      We are here to thrive, not just to endure. It’s true that difficult things will happen in each of our lives. We’ll all have those dragons to fight and dark swamps to cross….it’s how we earn the magic elixir of learning and strength, but our ability to bounce back from the battles is, in the words of Andy Proctor, “One of the most important life skills we can develop.”

      Andy, welcome to the LYS podcast.

      So, you are the happiness guy. First and foremost we like a good story on this podcast, so can we head right into your story? What events in your life took place that placed your feet on the path of figuring out how to create happy?

      Tune in to the audio program to hear Andy’s story.

      What tools have you used that have had the greatest impact in your own personal life?

      • Some of the tools Andy mentions:
        • Morning Dance Party – I dance on my trampoline almost every day. This is in an effort to develop my strength of zest. I put my earbuds in and turn on awesome music that makes me want to dance and I imagine I am the life of the party or that I’m on stage dancing in front of a stadium of cheering fans. This generates dopamine and serotonin in my brain as well as helping me to boost BDNF levels that are like “miracle grow” for the brain. A lot of my ideas for my day come while I’m dancing. Not always, but sometimes. I do at least 3 songs. Also, rebounding for 3 minutes boosts your immune system by up to 300%. So that’s also great.
        
        

      
      

      • • Write a Letter To Yourself – I recently heard a speech by Stuart Edge where he talked about writing a letter to himself asking for advice. I thought this was so powerful so I decided to try it. On a day when I was having a rough time, I decided to write a letter to my future self (64-year-old Andy). I asked for help in dealing with some of the issues I’m trying to figure out in my life. About a week later when I was sitting quietly, I felt like my future self was trying to write back, but I was too tired to write so I went to bed and had a dream of my future life. I woke up the next morning inspired and wrote a letter back from my future self giving me advice and encouragement. There are tons of benefits to doing this. Mindfulness. Trusting your intuition. Writing can improve your mode and be a catalyst for faster healing, and better overall quality of life.
        • Magic Wand Activity –  if you had a magic wand what would you change about the world? List at least five things or as many as you can. Then write what you can do to be a part of that change during your lifetime. List as many as you can. This activity was something I found from the Stanford Greater Good Science Center to increase purpose. It really helped me to zero in on what I thought needed to happen to make...]]>Episode 150: The Happiness Guru Is In:

          Interview with Andy Proctor

          Who doesn’t want to be happy? When you ask someone what they want in life, the most common answer is “to be happy.” Often the idea of happiness is considered one of chance, luck, or the blessed, but the truth is that your happiness depends only upon the story you create in your own mind about your life. Today’s guest is a certified positive psychology practitioner who has been teaching the science of human flourishing to mass media audiences for the past 5 years. He is the host of the More Happy Life podcast and has been featured in The New York Times, ABC News, Fox Business and many other national publications. He is currently on the board of TEDxBYU and is the director of the 1000 Words speaker series.

          Stay tuned for a 5 Tools for creating your own happiness and Andy Proctor’s story of how he found his way to the happiness path.

           

          We are here to thrive, not just to endure. It’s true that difficult things will happen in each of our lives. We’ll all have those dragons to fight and dark swamps to cross….it’s how we earn the magic elixir of learning and strength, but our ability to bounce back from the battles is, in the words of Andy Proctor, “One of the most important life skills we can develop.”

          Andy, welcome to the LYS podcast.

          So, you are the happiness guy. First and foremost we like a good story on this podcast, so can we head right into your story? What events in your life took place that placed your feet on the path of figuring out how to create happy?

          Tune in to the audio program to hear Andy’s story.

          What tools have you used that have had the greatest impact in your own personal life?

          • Some of the tools Andy mentions:
            • Morning Dance Party – I dance on my trampoline almost every day. This is in an effort to develop my strength of zest. I put my earbuds in and turn on awesome music that makes me want to dance and I imagine I am the life of the party or that I’m on stage dancing in front of a stadium of cheering fans. This generates dopamine and serotonin in my brain as well as helping me to boost BDNF levels that are like “miracle grow” for the brain. A lot of my ideas for my day come while I’m dancing. Not always, but sometimes. I do at least 3 songs. Also, rebounding for 3 minutes boosts your immune system by up to 300%. So that’s also great.
            
            
          
          
          • • Write a Letter To Yourself – I recently heard a speech by Stuart Edge where he talked about writing a letter to himself asking for advice. I thought this was so powerful so I decided to try it. On a day when I was having a rough time, I decided to write a letter to my future self (64-year-old Andy). I asked for help in dealing with some of the issues I’m trying to figure out in my life. About a week later when I was sitting quietly, I felt like my future self was trying to write back, but I was too tired to write so I went to bed and had a dream of my future life. I woke up the next morning inspired and wrote a letter back from my future self giving me advice and encouragement. There are tons of benefits to doing this. Mindfulness. Trusting your intuition. Writing can improve your mode and be a catalyst for faster healing, and better overall quality of life.
            • Magic Wand Activity –  if you had a magic wand what would you change about the world? List at least five things or as many as you can. Then write what you can do to be a part of that change during your lifetime. List as many as you can. This activity was something I found from the Stanford Greater Good Science Center to increase purpose. It really helped me to zero in on what I thought needed to happen to make the world a better place and I found real things (which I have since done) to make a dent within my sphere of influence. (working on a new anti-loneliness project, creating a course for those who struggle with their faith, etc.) Victor Frankl said “those who have a why to live can bear with almost any “how”
            • Friendship Wall – One of the things that has helped me to decrease my own loneliness and increase my happiness has been creating what I call a friendship wall. We take pictures in our phones, but how often do we pull up our albums and look at them in our phones to remember those great moments with the people we are close to? So I used an app called freeprints to print off pictures of people I love and hang them on my wall. Then I look at my wall every day and it helps remind me that I am not alone and it makes me want to reach out to my good friends more often. And I do, and it helps.
            • What went well? – This helps you to train your brain to focus on the things that go well during your day. At the end of each day write down three things that went well during the last 24 hours. Studies show that if you do this for 8 weeks every day, you literally rewire your brain. We are all born with the negativity bias. Our brains are wired to focus on possible threats and we focus more on the things that are negative than the things that are positive. Even though more positive things happen than negative, it takes almost three times as many positive things to make up for the negative things that happen. This is why writing down what went well can have an impact on us.
            
            
          
          

          When we hit those rough patches it doesn’t feel like we’re in charge of our own happiness. Often it feels like an emotion controls us, or another person’s actions have plummeted us into despair or discouragement, or even apathy. But happiness is just like anything else worthwhile. It takes some effort to create positive mindsets and habits, but WE ARE completely in charge of the story we are writing and whether it’s a tragedy, a comedy, or drama. Thanks to Andy for sharing his insights – I hope you found even just one nugget of wisdom to take into your way of being for a good strong trial run. BE HAPPY my friends – This is what finding joy in your journey looks like. Decide to put on the rosy glasses, the dance shoes, and a focus on flowers rather than weeks.

          Remember to use the Love Your Story podcast website – you’ve got access to all 140+ episodes for sharing and listening. You can buy your own LYS t-shirt. You can buy a copy of the new book: LIFE Living Intentional and Fearless every day. You can also find it on Amazon.

          See you next week. Get out there and do some intentional living!

          ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4237Wed, 25 Sep 2019 09:00:52 -070042:16falsefullWho doesn’t want to be happy? When you ask someone what they want in life, the most common answer is “to be happy.” Often the idea of happiness is considered one of chance, luck, or the blessed, but the truth is that your happiness depends only upon the story you create in your own mind about your life. Today’s guest is a certified positive psychology practitioner who has been teaching the science of human flourishing to mass media audiences for the past 5 years. He is the host of the More Happy Life podcast and has been featured in The New York Times, ABC News, Fox Business and many other national publications. He is currently on the board of TEDxBYU and is the director of the 1000 Words speaker series. Tune in to hear some tips on happy.Lori LeeEpisode 149 How is Your Life Like a Fairytale?Episode 149 How is Your Life Like a Fairytale?

          Once upon a time, there was you….

          And then what happened?

          When we are young we pattern our life dreams and expectations after the stories we hear and the movies we watch. Often, in American culture, Disney plays a major role in that. While the Disney rendition of fairytales is a butcher job of the originals, children only know what they are shown and taught and so we head off into our lives picturing a prince or princess and a happily ever-after.

          We all want love, magic, and riches. That sounds good – I’ll take that.

          I learned this week when I asked people how their life was like a fairytale, that the go-to mindset was to think about how it was a happily ever after. Fairytale seems to equate with perfection or the ideal. Stay tuned to hear my man-on-the-street quicky interviews where people got to share how their lives were like fairytales.

          When I first started getting the responses and everyone was going straight to the happily-ever-after,  I had to ask – haven’t you ever read an entire fairytale? What about the challenges along the way? What about the problem the main character faced? Repunzel was a prisoner who wanted freedom, Cinderella was enslaved and wanted a little recreation, the Shoemaker and his wife were on the verge of financial ruin and desperately wanted money to buy food, the princess in the Princess and the Frog had lost something important to her. She desperately wanted her golden ball. Goldilocks was tired and hungry and wanted a place to crash.

          The main character wants something in these stories and they are faced with major obstacles. Fairytales aren’t just about happily ever afters, they are about a hero or heroine facing heartbreak/challenge/disappointment, often the death of a parent. We love the stories with happy endings, but the stories are only interesting and beloved because the main character found their way through the struggle.

          This is the part of the stories that smack a bit more of real life. We will always have challenges because those are the steps to growth and understanding. Challenges –check!

          Let’s talk about more ways our lives are like fairytales:

          One of the things I love about fairytales is the way magic shows up to help. Whether it is a fairy godmother, or an elf, or a frog, or simply the thing they wanted, there is a pattern that aligns closely with the universal laws of creation. As we desire, believe we will receive, envision and focus, then magic shows up to help us take something from an idea into literal creation.  I love the fairy godmothers– the serendipity, the “coincidence” the unplanned for things that show up just when I need them. I love these because it makes life seem so unpredictable and wonderful and supported by goodness. How wonderful to be able to believe that magic will show up. We all have those people we turn to in tough times – the people who show up in a pinch. Sometimes it is the small and simple things – the books, the advice, the workshop, the tip, the connection, the idea that glitters with magic and takes us where we need to go. Pay attention to the magic in your life and celebrate how much it really is like a fairytale. (Listen to the episode on serendipity – episode 10)

           

          It’s also like a fairytale because we have wonderful pets and while they might not sing and talk to us in our native tongue they love us unconditionally and whenever life gets rough they are there.

          Have you ever noticed that in fairytales there is almost always an enchanted forest? We also have nature – botanical gardens, backyards, wilderness, hiking trails, fresh air – head into nature and feel the magic.

          One of the lessons of fairytales is that beauty is often buried. Things are not as they appear. A beautiful face doesn’t equate with a beautiful personality. The lesson here is the...]]>Episode 149 How is Your Life Like a Fairytale?

          Once upon a time, there was you….

          And then what happened?

          When we are young we pattern our life dreams and expectations after the stories we hear and the movies we watch. Often, in American culture, Disney plays a major role in that. While the Disney rendition of fairytales is a butcher job of the originals, children only know what they are shown and taught and so we head off into our lives picturing a prince or princess and a happily ever-after.

          We all want love, magic, and riches. That sounds good – I’ll take that.

          I learned this week when I asked people how their life was like a fairytale, that the go-to mindset was to think about how it was a happily ever after. Fairytale seems to equate with perfection or the ideal. Stay tuned to hear my man-on-the-street quicky interviews where people got to share how their lives were like fairytales.

          When I first started getting the responses and everyone was going straight to the happily-ever-after,  I had to ask – haven’t you ever read an entire fairytale? What about the challenges along the way? What about the problem the main character faced? Repunzel was a prisoner who wanted freedom, Cinderella was enslaved and wanted a little recreation, the Shoemaker and his wife were on the verge of financial ruin and desperately wanted money to buy food, the princess in the Princess and the Frog had lost something important to her. She desperately wanted her golden ball. Goldilocks was tired and hungry and wanted a place to crash.

          The main character wants something in these stories and they are faced with major obstacles. Fairytales aren’t just about happily ever afters, they are about a hero or heroine facing heartbreak/challenge/disappointment, often the death of a parent. We love the stories with happy endings, but the stories are only interesting and beloved because the main character found their way through the struggle.

          This is the part of the stories that smack a bit more of real life. We will always have challenges because those are the steps to growth and understanding. Challenges –check!

          Let’s talk about more ways our lives are like fairytales:

          One of the things I love about fairytales is the way magic shows up to help. Whether it is a fairy godmother, or an elf, or a frog, or simply the thing they wanted, there is a pattern that aligns closely with the universal laws of creation. As we desire, believe we will receive, envision and focus, then magic shows up to help us take something from an idea into literal creation.  I love the fairy godmothers– the serendipity, the “coincidence” the unplanned for things that show up just when I need them. I love these because it makes life seem so unpredictable and wonderful and supported by goodness. How wonderful to be able to believe that magic will show up. We all have those people we turn to in tough times – the people who show up in a pinch. Sometimes it is the small and simple things – the books, the advice, the workshop, the tip, the connection, the idea that glitters with magic and takes us where we need to go. Pay attention to the magic in your life and celebrate how much it really is like a fairytale. (Listen to the episode on serendipity – episode 10)

           

          It’s also like a fairytale because we have wonderful pets and while they might not sing and talk to us in our native tongue they love us unconditionally and whenever life gets rough they are there.

          Have you ever noticed that in fairytales there is almost always an enchanted forest? We also have nature – botanical gardens, backyards, wilderness, hiking trails, fresh air – head into nature and feel the magic.

          One of the lessons of fairytales is that beauty is often buried. Things are not as they appear. A beautiful face doesn’t equate with a beautiful personality. The lesson here is the importance of not judging.

          What about true love? Most fairytales involve relationships of the romantic kind because this is something the human heart longs for. We long for love, acceptance, someone who sees our beauty and value. It’s one of our greatest longings. If you haven’t found this, remember to look at others this same way and be grateful for all the love you do have in your life and you will create more.

          I did something for this episode that I’ve wanted to do for a while. I went out on the streets of Salt Lake City, Utah and did a Man-On-The-Street approach. I asked others how their lives were like fairytales. Here’s what they had to say.

          Tune in to the audio program for my interviews with the people of Salt Lake City.

          This romantic idea of your life as a fairytale – of you as the hero or heroine of an intriguing tale is fun to play with. How IS YOUR life like a fairytale? Your challenge this week is to think about your own personal role in your own personal fairytale. Do you have the support of loving animals or fairy godmothers? Does magic show up just when you need it – an idea, a book, a person? Do you face a challenge that requires courage and ingenuity? Have you found your prince or princess? Do you live in a wonderful cottage or castle? Just for a moment, realize how much your life is like the beloved fairytales and think to yourself: “If this were a fairytale, what would the brave protagonist do now?” How do I write the best life story moving forward? What can I do to create connection (Snow White and the 7 Dwarves), possibility (Cinderella), and self-care (Rapunzel)? What courageous thing can I do to move my story forward in all the best ways?

          Have a great week this week. If you’re a fan of the show, you’ll love my book: LIFE – Living Intentional and Fearless Every day – the 21 LIFE Connection Challenges. It’s an organized way to create possibility, connection and self-care in your life. Available on Amazon or there is a link on loveyourstorypodcast.com.

           

          ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4234Wed, 11 Sep 2019 09:00:10 -070024:48falsefullOnce upon a time, there was you…. And then what happened? Tune in to hear what people on the street said when I asked them how their life was like a fairytaleLori LeeEpisode 148 Keys to Courage: Interview with Amy PerkinsEpisode 148 Keys to Courage: Interview with Amy Perkins

          How many powerful manifestors do you know? What are the keys to being brave enough to get what you really want from your life story?

          Today I’m interviewing Amy Perkins, whose platform is the Keys to Courage. Tune in to learn from a lady who has learned to manifest powerfully, and let’s see if we can find some keys for writing the life story we want to live for ourselves.

          Amy is passionate about helping you live your best life. That dream life. The one you wish you had.

          Eighteen months ago, she got sick and tired of going through the motions. She felt there had to be more. She left a 25-year career in education after witnessing leaders who were not leading with integrity. She wanted a career that was fulfilling, one that made an impact and left a legacy. She sought a deeper bond with her family and she sought richer relationships with friends. So she went on a journey to find her purpose and live with purpose, and on that journey, she found the keys to building confidence, finding clarity and the keys to courage. Today she’s going to share her journey and the magic elixir that she discovered on her own hero’s journey.

          Tune into the audio program to hear her story and to find out what she thinks the keys to courage and manifesting are.

          To contact Amy:

          Learn more about why she founded Keys to Courage at: https://www.keystocourage.com/
          Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/keystocourage/
          LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/amy-perkins/detail/recent-activity/shares/
          Blog: https://www.keystocourage.com/blog/

           

          Self-belief and self-love is always the foundation of living your best life story. I’m grateful for Amy’s enthusiasm and insights into increasing our self-love, our faith, our courage! Share this episode with someone who may need it and your challenge for today is to ………..

          Don’t forget to use the Love Your Story website – all 130+episodes are available to listen to and share. You can buy your love your story t-shirts, or get the link for my book: LIFE Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday – the 21 LIFE connection challenges.

          Have a great week taking another step toward self-love and the story YOU want to live. See you in a couple weeks.

           

          ]]>Episode 148 Keys to Courage: Interview with Amy Perkins

          How many powerful manifestors do you know? What are the keys to being brave enough to get what you really want from your life story?

          Today I’m interviewing Amy Perkins, whose platform is the Keys to Courage. Tune in to learn from a lady who has learned to manifest powerfully, and let’s see if we can find some keys for writing the life story we want to live for ourselves.

          Amy is passionate about helping you live your best life. That dream life. The one you wish you had.

          Eighteen months ago, she got sick and tired of going through the motions. She felt there had to be more. She left a 25-year career in education after witnessing leaders who were not leading with integrity. She wanted a career that was fulfilling, one that made an impact and left a legacy. She sought a deeper bond with her family and she sought richer relationships with friends. So she went on a journey to find her purpose and live with purpose, and on that journey, she found the keys to building confidence, finding clarity and the keys to courage. Today she’s going to share her journey and the magic elixir that she discovered on her own hero’s journey.

          Tune into the audio program to hear her story and to find out what she thinks the keys to courage and manifesting are.

          To contact Amy:

          Learn more about why she founded Keys to Courage at: https://www.keystocourage.com/
          Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/keystocourage/
          LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/amy-perkins/detail/recent-activity/shares/
          Blog: https://www.keystocourage.com/blog/

           

          Self-belief and self-love is always the foundation of living your best life story. I’m grateful for Amy’s enthusiasm and insights into increasing our self-love, our faith, our courage! Share this episode with someone who may need it and your challenge for today is to ………..

          Don’t forget to use the Love Your Story website – all 130+episodes are available to listen to and share. You can buy your love your story t-shirts, or get the link for my book: LIFE Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday – the 21 LIFE connection challenges.

          Have a great week taking another step toward self-love and the story YOU want to live. See you in a couple weeks.

           

          ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4227Wed, 28 Aug 2019 09:00:13 -070028:13falsefullToday I’m interviewing Amy Perkins, whose platform is the Keys to Courage. Tune in to learn from a lady who has learned to manifest powerfully, and let’s see if we can find some keys for writing the life story we want to live for ourselves.Lori LeeEpisode 147 Both Sides of the Story: Inside Adoption – Interview with Cherie Burton and Wendy ToomerEpisode 147 Both Sides of the Story: Inside Adoption – Interview with Cherie Burton and Wendy Toomer

          When Cherie Burton was 25 she got pregnant and was abandoned by the father. Her decision to adopt out her baby daughter was accompanied by all the birth mother grief, stigma, shame, and judgment that often accompanies an unwed mother and “giving a baby away.”

          She showed up on the adoptive parents’ doorstep when her daughter was just 3 weeks old and Wendy’s new family let Cherie wake her up and rock her back to sleep. Cherie is here today to walk us through her story of the decision of choosing adoption, the path of the toll that takes on the heart and mind, and the things she’s learned.

          The adoption was an open adoption and the adoptive family has always been open with Wendy about her birth mom.

          Cherie says “I learned we do not own each other. Parents merely have stewardship and a our souls are on “loan” from the Divine. We’re just all here to teach each other love, sacrifice, forgiveness, kindness and compassion. I’m pretty convinced Wendy, her mom Susan and I had soul contracts with each other to have this experience before we came here.”

          Wendy, who is also with us today, says because of the open adoption she has always known how she came to her family and her adoptive parents have always been supportive. She acknowledges that it does have a unique set of issues, but knowing her genetics has helped her deal with PPD and PPA after having her first child, because she knew that mental illness ran in her genes and she was able to seek help from her birth mom to get through some tough spots. She says her birth mom is like an aunt or a best friend and they talk often and are so much alike.

          Cherie Burton, the birth mother, has degrees in psychology and sociology and has worked as a group counselor at a psychiatric hospital, an addiction recovery center and a behavioral facility for teen boys.  She has stepped away from clinical work to inspire women worldwide to reach their full potential through books, workshops and retreats. Her work as an author, podcaster, international business owner, speaker, mom of 6, emotional release facilitator and leadership development trainer has helped thousands of women magnify their gifts and find wholeness

          Wendy Toomer, the adopted child, is now married to her husband Larkin. They have been married for 7 years and she is pregnant with their second child. She is a Master Esthetician specializing in laser hair removal but mainly stays home with her best friend, a wild two-year-old boy named Tucker. During this season of her life she is focused on nurturing babies in a healthy and happy home.

          Tune into the audio program for Cherie’s story and how she decided to embark on adoption as a 25-year-old, one year away from graduating from college, and then hear Wendy’s experience as the daughter with two mothers.

          This is our first interview on adoption and I am so pleased to be able to do a “Both Sides of the Story” approach. Thank you, Cherie and Wendy, for shining a light on your process of learning, growth, and experience. It is by our stories that we shine a light on the path in front of others in how to move forward in spaces we personally have not yet trod.

          To learn more about Cherie’s work you can find her at:

          cherie@cherieburton.com

          Website:Episode 147 Both Sides of the Story: Inside Adoption – Interview with Cherie Burton and Wendy Toomer

          When Cherie Burton was 25 she got pregnant and was abandoned by the father. Her decision to adopt out her baby daughter was accompanied by all the birth mother grief, stigma, shame, and judgment that often accompanies an unwed mother and “giving a baby away.”

          She showed up on the adoptive parents’ doorstep when her daughter was just 3 weeks old and Wendy’s new family let Cherie wake her up and rock her back to sleep. Cherie is here today to walk us through her story of the decision of choosing adoption, the path of the toll that takes on the heart and mind, and the things she’s learned.

          The adoption was an open adoption and the adoptive family has always been open with Wendy about her birth mom.

          Cherie says “I learned we do not own each other. Parents merely have stewardship and a our souls are on “loan” from the Divine. We’re just all here to teach each other love, sacrifice, forgiveness, kindness and compassion. I’m pretty convinced Wendy, her mom Susan and I had soul contracts with each other to have this experience before we came here.”

          Wendy, who is also with us today, says because of the open adoption she has always known how she came to her family and her adoptive parents have always been supportive. She acknowledges that it does have a unique set of issues, but knowing her genetics has helped her deal with PPD and PPA after having her first child, because she knew that mental illness ran in her genes and she was able to seek help from her birth mom to get through some tough spots. She says her birth mom is like an aunt or a best friend and they talk often and are so much alike.

          Cherie Burton, the birth mother, has degrees in psychology and sociology and has worked as a group counselor at a psychiatric hospital, an addiction recovery center and a behavioral facility for teen boys.  She has stepped away from clinical work to inspire women worldwide to reach their full potential through books, workshops and retreats. Her work as an author, podcaster, international business owner, speaker, mom of 6, emotional release facilitator and leadership development trainer has helped thousands of women magnify their gifts and find wholeness

          Wendy Toomer, the adopted child, is now married to her husband Larkin. They have been married for 7 years and she is pregnant with their second child. She is a Master Esthetician specializing in laser hair removal but mainly stays home with her best friend, a wild two-year-old boy named Tucker. During this season of her life she is focused on nurturing babies in a healthy and happy home.

          Tune into the audio program for Cherie’s story and how she decided to embark on adoption as a 25-year-old, one year away from graduating from college, and then hear Wendy’s experience as the daughter with two mothers.

          This is our first interview on adoption and I am so pleased to be able to do a “Both Sides of the Story” approach. Thank you, Cherie and Wendy, for shining a light on your process of learning, growth, and experience. It is by our stories that we shine a light on the path in front of others in how to move forward in spaces we personally have not yet trod.

          To learn more about Cherie’s work you can find her at:

          cherie@cherieburton.com

          Website:https://cherieburton.com/#Home Women Seeking Wholeness Podcast:https://cherieburton.com/category/womenseekingwholeness/ 

          FB: https://www.facebook.com/CherieBurtonPage/  

          As you all know – my motto is to live intentionally and fearless every day!

          “I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived.”–Henry David Thoreau.

          My new book LIFE – Live Intentional and Fearless Every day is available on Amazon or a link on www.loveyourstorypodcast.com. With 21 LIFE Connection Challenges to help you create more connection, possibility, and self-care in your own wonderful story. To help you live your best life story on purpose.

          ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4222Wed, 14 Aug 2019 09:00:33 -070045:42falsefullEpisode 147 Both Sides of the Story: Inside Adoption – Interview with Cherie Burton and Wendy Toomer When Cherie Burton was 25 she got pregnant and was abandoned by the father. Her decision to adopt out her baby daughter was accompanied by all the birth mother grief, stigma, shame, and judgment that often accompanies an…Lori LeeEpisode 146 Carpooling With Death: Finding Peace in Loss – Interview Margaret MeloniEpisode 146 Carpooling With Death: Finding Peace in Loss – Interview Margaret Meloni

           

          In my teens I loved the book series The Incarnations of Immortality. Thantos/Grim Reaper was one of my favorite characters.  As an adult, I guess that fascination held over because I dress up as the Grim Reaper for Halloween every year. I have a real scythe hung from the pegboard in my garage. That being said, for all the interest in the incarnation itself, I have only had my grandparent’s die and when my son was diagnosed with leukemia my mind would occasionally turn to the “what if” and I would immediately retreat. At the Western States Folklore conference this past weekend there was a paper presented exploring the use of a character – the Grim Reaper or the like – (and there IS one in every culture) – to represent an event that we each must face. One suggestion that was made was that we have created a figure to escort us from this life into the next because we don’t know where we are going. There are so many unknowns. Perhaps those unknowns are what creates so much fear around death, but as the cheeky like to say, “No one is getting out of here alive.”

          Margaret Meloni – the author of Carpooling with Death, is a Buddhist practitioner and a new voice on the subject of death awareness. Dealing with the death of her father, her mother and her husband within a two-year period gave her the opportunity to “make friends with death,” as she put it. Her book is to help others accept death as an essential part of life and to become death ready.

          Tune into our audio discussion to hear what she has to say.

          To buy her book:

           

          As I conduct my interviews for this podcast, one of the themes that often repeats itself as we deal with some of the most sacred and dark places we have to travel, often death of a child, a spouse, a loved one is at the heart of that struggle. Today’s interview was to share Margaret’s story, but also to give tools as we all must eventually deal with the conclusion of our stories, as well as the conclusion of the stories of loved ones. I hope you’ve received some insights, tips, or inspiration for a positive mind-set shift as we face the final chapters of our stories.

          While we life – my motto is to live intentionally and fearless every day! “I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived.” Henry David Thoreau.  My new book LIFE – Live Intentional and Fearless Every day is available on www.loveyourstorypodcast.com. With 21 LIFE Connection Challenges to help you create more connection, possibility, and self-care in your own wonderful story. To help you live on purpose before your own final chapter comes along.

          ]]>Episode 146 Carpooling With Death: Finding Peace in Loss – Interview Margaret Meloni

           

          In my teens I loved the book series The Incarnations of Immortality. Thantos/Grim Reaper was one of my favorite characters.  As an adult, I guess that fascination held over because I dress up as the Grim Reaper for Halloween every year. I have a real scythe hung from the pegboard in my garage. That being said, for all the interest in the incarnation itself, I have only had my grandparent’s die and when my son was diagnosed with leukemia my mind would occasionally turn to the “what if” and I would immediately retreat. At the Western States Folklore conference this past weekend there was a paper presented exploring the use of a character – the Grim Reaper or the like – (and there IS one in every culture) – to represent an event that we each must face. One suggestion that was made was that we have created a figure to escort us from this life into the next because we don’t know where we are going. There are so many unknowns. Perhaps those unknowns are what creates so much fear around death, but as the cheeky like to say, “No one is getting out of here alive.”

          Margaret Meloni – the author of Carpooling with Death, is a Buddhist practitioner and a new voice on the subject of death awareness. Dealing with the death of her father, her mother and her husband within a two-year period gave her the opportunity to “make friends with death,” as she put it. Her book is to help others accept death as an essential part of life and to become death ready.

          Tune into our audio discussion to hear what she has to say.

          To buy her book:

           

          As I conduct my interviews for this podcast, one of the themes that often repeats itself as we deal with some of the most sacred and dark places we have to travel, often death of a child, a spouse, a loved one is at the heart of that struggle. Today’s interview was to share Margaret’s story, but also to give tools as we all must eventually deal with the conclusion of our stories, as well as the conclusion of the stories of loved ones. I hope you’ve received some insights, tips, or inspiration for a positive mind-set shift as we face the final chapters of our stories.

          While we life – my motto is to live intentionally and fearless every day! “I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived.” Henry David Thoreau.  My new book LIFE – Live Intentional and Fearless Every day is available on www.loveyourstorypodcast.com. With 21 LIFE Connection Challenges to help you create more connection, possibility, and self-care in your own wonderful story. To help you live on purpose before your own final chapter comes along.

          ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4217Wed, 31 Jul 2019 09:00:32 -070044:12falsefullWe've all heard the saying that "death is a part of life," but that doesn't soften the blow of loss or drive away our fears of the unknown. Author Margaret Meloni lost her father, mother, and husband within2 years of each other and found that by using her Buddist techniques she could find peace amidst great loss. She shares how in her book and we get into some great discussion on the impermanence of life and how we can find peace and acceptance.Lori LeeEpisode 145 The Power of Story to Parent and Sell: Interview with Paul SmithEpisode 145 The Power of Story to Parent and Sell:

          Interview with Paul Smith

           

          Join me today for my interview with Paul Smith

          Paul Smith is one of the world’s leading experts in business storytelling. He’s one of Inc. Magazine’s Top 100 Leadership Speakers of 2018, a storytelling coach, and bestselling author of the books Sell with a Story (#1 Amazon bestseller in Sales and Selling), Parenting with a Story, and Lead with a Story (#1 Amazon bestseller in Business Communication) already in its 11^th printing and available in 7 languages around the world. Paul is also a former consultant at Accenture and former executive and 20-year veteran of The Procter & Gamble Company.

          As part of his research on the effectiveness of storytelling, Paul has personally interviewed over 250 CEOs, executives, leaders, and salespeople in 25 countries, documenting over 2,000 individual stories. Leveraging those stories and interviews, Paul identified the components of effective storytelling and developed templates and tools to apply them in practice. His work has been featured in The Wall Street Journal, Inc. Magazine, Time, Forbes, Fast Company, The Washington Post, PR News, and Success Magazine, among others.

          Paul delivers professional workshops and keynote addresses on effective storytelling for leaders and salespeople. His clients include international giants like Hewlett Packard, Google, Ford Motor Company, Bayer Medical, Abbott, Novartis, Progressive Insurance, Kaiser Permanente, and Procter & Gamble.

          Paul holds a bachelor’s degree in economics and an MBA from the Wharton School at the University of Pennsylvania. He lives with his wife and two sons in the Cincinnati suburb of Mason, Ohio. He can be found at www.leadwithastory.com.

          Tune into the audio for my candid discussion with him and hear some of his favorite teaching stories.

          To buy his books or follow his work:

          Web: www.LeadWithAStory.com
          LinkedIn: http://www.linkedin.com/in/smithpa9

          Books:
          Lead with a Story (Amazon #1 Bestseller in Business Communication)
          Sell with a Story (Amazon #1 Bestseller in Sales and Selling)
          Parenting with a Story 

          ]]>Episode 145 The Power of Story to Parent and Sell:

          Interview with Paul Smith

           

          Join me today for my interview with Paul Smith

          Paul Smith is one of the world’s leading experts in business storytelling. He’s one of Inc. Magazine’s Top 100 Leadership Speakers of 2018, a storytelling coach, and bestselling author of the books Sell with a Story (#1 Amazon bestseller in Sales and Selling), Parenting with a Story, and Lead with a Story (#1 Amazon bestseller in Business Communication) already in its 11^th printing and available in 7 languages around the world. Paul is also a former consultant at Accenture and former executive and 20-year veteran of The Procter & Gamble Company.

          As part of his research on the effectiveness of storytelling, Paul has personally interviewed over 250 CEOs, executives, leaders, and salespeople in 25 countries, documenting over 2,000 individual stories. Leveraging those stories and interviews, Paul identified the components of effective storytelling and developed templates and tools to apply them in practice. His work has been featured in The Wall Street Journal, Inc. Magazine, Time, Forbes, Fast Company, The Washington Post, PR News, and Success Magazine, among others.

          Paul delivers professional workshops and keynote addresses on effective storytelling for leaders and salespeople. His clients include international giants like Hewlett Packard, Google, Ford Motor Company, Bayer Medical, Abbott, Novartis, Progressive Insurance, Kaiser Permanente, and Procter & Gamble.

          Paul holds a bachelor’s degree in economics and an MBA from the Wharton School at the University of Pennsylvania. He lives with his wife and two sons in the Cincinnati suburb of Mason, Ohio. He can be found at www.leadwithastory.com.

          Tune into the audio for my candid discussion with him and hear some of his favorite teaching stories.

          To buy his books or follow his work:

          Web: www.LeadWithAStory.com
          LinkedIn: http://www.linkedin.com/in/smithpa9

          Books:
          Lead with a Story (Amazon #1 Bestseller in Business Communication)
          Sell with a Story (Amazon #1 Bestseller in Sales and Selling)
          Parenting with a Story 

          ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4211Wed, 17 Jul 2019 09:00:30 -070044:46falsefullPaul Smith is in the house! Leading expert on how to use stories to parent, sell and excel in the business world. You won't want to miss this conversation with the author of three best-selling books on how to use story. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it. We're talking about giving your kids the courage to stand up in tough situations, explaining to a client what your business is about in a quick and memorable way, and creating a story around the item you're selling so it creates value. This is the big stuff people.Lori LeeEpisode 144 Novelty: Keeping Life InterestingEpisode 144 The Power of Novelty

           

          Bored? Been doing a lot of the same things lately? Talking to a lot of the same people? Dealing with the same old problems?

          Have you ever watched a movie or read a book where every day was exactly the same? The reason there is only one movie like this – Groundhog Day – is because it’s a reallllly boring story. We, humans, have active minds and novelty, freshness, bright and flashy squirrels grab our attention. Today’s podcast is about the richness of bringing novelty into your story.

          We all have ways of doing things. We all have things that work for us.

          I like my flavor of tea, I like to drive my Subaru, I like my house clean, I prefer my ripped jeans, and if I had my druthers I would wear high heels maybe only 5 times a year. I have my favorite Burt’s Bees lip color. And frankly, it’s taken me a lifetime to get all my favorites pinned down. I’m not saying get rid of the good stuff. But I am opening a discussion about bringing a little va-voom into your love life, into your family relationships, into your exercise routine, into your career….where could your life use some novelty? Let’s shake it up.

          Cambridge Dictionary defines novelty as the quality of being new and unusual.

          Have you ever been in a place where someone did something completely unexpected? They busted out a dance move, or started singing at the top of their lungs, or threw you over their shoulder. What about the dance mobs that show up in a shopping center or the giant bouquet of balloons someone sent you at work? These things are unexpected and they are fun, interesting and memorable.

          Let me start with a question for you – which part of your life is a little flat? I have a rather easy solution for you. Just requires a little thought, maybe just some spontaneity.

          The solution is novelty.

          Today’s discussion is going to be short, sweet and to the point – just a reminder to add some spice and keep things interesting. I’ll keep it short so you have more time to figure out the fresh, new thing you’re going to add to your life story today.

          Research into brain health and longevity suggests that regular experiences of novelty are essential to a long, happy life. Why is this?

          It’s simple – according to Brain World Magazine, novelty makes us happy because a rush of dopamine accompanies fresh experiences of any kind. In one study published in the journal Neuron, participants were shown a set of pictures – mostly commonplace images like landscapes, faces, interiors, then randomly an “oddball” image was thrown in and when that happened the pleasure centers of the brain lit up resulting in that dopamine rush.

          This programming has probably helped us seek learning and growth through the ages. The attraction to novelty motivates us to explore and adventure and this gives us more information for survival.

          But how does it help us live better now? Is novelty important in our safe modern world?  I’m going to suggest it’s exactly the same. Maybe we’re not exploring new lands or maybe we are, but what if something as ordinary as the survival of a relationship requires something a little new and fresh? Frankly, it’s impossible to thrive without novelty and understanding this about the human condition is a powerful tool to living better and creating better relationships at home, work, and in the world around us.

          When you do the same thing all the time with the same person life becomes WAY too predictable, less fun, and sometimes just boring. Maybe the best thing for your love life or a relationship that’s getting a little dull is to shake it up. Do something you haven’t done before, or done for a while. Do something unexpected.

          So here are some ideas for you:

          I surveyed a dozen people about novelty ideas to spice up relationships. Aside from all the sexual remarks that popped out- which is also a great...]]>Episode 144 The Power of Novelty

           

          Bored? Been doing a lot of the same things lately? Talking to a lot of the same people? Dealing with the same old problems?

          Have you ever watched a movie or read a book where every day was exactly the same? The reason there is only one movie like this – Groundhog Day – is because it’s a reallllly boring story. We, humans, have active minds and novelty, freshness, bright and flashy squirrels grab our attention. Today’s podcast is about the richness of bringing novelty into your story.

          We all have ways of doing things. We all have things that work for us.

          I like my flavor of tea, I like to drive my Subaru, I like my house clean, I prefer my ripped jeans, and if I had my druthers I would wear high heels maybe only 5 times a year. I have my favorite Burt’s Bees lip color. And frankly, it’s taken me a lifetime to get all my favorites pinned down. I’m not saying get rid of the good stuff. But I am opening a discussion about bringing a little va-voom into your love life, into your family relationships, into your exercise routine, into your career….where could your life use some novelty? Let’s shake it up.

          Cambridge Dictionary defines novelty as the quality of being new and unusual.

          Have you ever been in a place where someone did something completely unexpected? They busted out a dance move, or started singing at the top of their lungs, or threw you over their shoulder. What about the dance mobs that show up in a shopping center or the giant bouquet of balloons someone sent you at work? These things are unexpected and they are fun, interesting and memorable.

          Let me start with a question for you – which part of your life is a little flat? I have a rather easy solution for you. Just requires a little thought, maybe just some spontaneity.

          The solution is novelty.

          Today’s discussion is going to be short, sweet and to the point – just a reminder to add some spice and keep things interesting. I’ll keep it short so you have more time to figure out the fresh, new thing you’re going to add to your life story today.

          Research into brain health and longevity suggests that regular experiences of novelty are essential to a long, happy life. Why is this?

          It’s simple – according to Brain World Magazine, novelty makes us happy because a rush of dopamine accompanies fresh experiences of any kind. In one study published in the journal Neuron, participants were shown a set of pictures – mostly commonplace images like landscapes, faces, interiors, then randomly an “oddball” image was thrown in and when that happened the pleasure centers of the brain lit up resulting in that dopamine rush.

          This programming has probably helped us seek learning and growth through the ages. The attraction to novelty motivates us to explore and adventure and this gives us more information for survival.

          But how does it help us live better now? Is novelty important in our safe modern world?  I’m going to suggest it’s exactly the same. Maybe we’re not exploring new lands or maybe we are, but what if something as ordinary as the survival of a relationship requires something a little new and fresh? Frankly, it’s impossible to thrive without novelty and understanding this about the human condition is a powerful tool to living better and creating better relationships at home, work, and in the world around us.

          When you do the same thing all the time with the same person life becomes WAY too predictable, less fun, and sometimes just boring. Maybe the best thing for your love life or a relationship that’s getting a little dull is to shake it up. Do something you haven’t done before, or done for a while. Do something unexpected.

          So here are some ideas for you:

          I surveyed a dozen people about novelty ideas to spice up relationships. Aside from all the sexual remarks that popped out- which is also a great idea,  other ideas included:

          1. Having each person write a list of 5 things they’d like to try or do and then taking turns doing the things on both lists. And, being a good sport about the other’s list, even if it wouldn’t be your first choice.
          2. Do something crazy together every day for a week. The level of crazy would depend on how much the couple already does things outside their comfort zone.
          3. One woman left a note on the kitchen table when her husband got home from work. It said, “Husband, welcome home. I’m hiding in the house with a Nerf gun, here is the other one… The loser cooks dinner tonight. May the odds be ever in your favor. Xo your wife.
          4. Don’t forget the fun in the mundane space of just getting things done.: Hike sports game, movie, amusement park, museum, bungee jumping… something you guys think is fun or something you haven’t done before to keep it novel.
          5. Take a class together that is fun and a little outside your comfort zone.
          6. Leave an unexpected note in an unexpected place.
          7. Create a treasure hunt for the other party.
          8. Maybe it’s as simple as offering to do something new and kind and unexpected for the other person every day for a week. I bet that becomes a memorable week.

          
          

          Speaking of memory –

          Learning, whether academic, job-related or personal all relies on novelty. New experiences stimulate the memory centers of the brain as well ,that’s why you remember the out-of-the-ordinary event that happened in high school, or the craziest date you ever went on, or the person who shoved a pie in their friend’s face, or the greeter at Walmart that sang you a beautiful song while you were at self-checkout, or hippies in the park having sex, or the streaker at the College basketball game, or the kid that takes his shirt off at the bowling tournament. These were real events that the people in my survey remembered…. This is also why good teachers and leaders are looking for new ways to approach otherwise mundane topics that are fraught with the known or expected. It’s the novelty that cements them in your memory. I’m preparing a public presentation for next month and I’m trying to think of something unexpected and novel I can do to get their attention and make it memorable….

          So we have the dopamine – increased happiness. We have the memory centers that are stimulated by novelty – for retaining our experiences. But we also have motivation and engagement created by the dopamine. People cannot maintain interest in any topic for long if novelty is not present. We need dopamine to keep us motivated, or we’ll look for pleasure and interest in other places. This is a great thing to understand when you want or need to keep people or a person interested in a topic, a relationship, an idea. Novelty again is the key.

          What about professionally?

          Career success is also dependent on this. People become bored and unmotivated at work- that’s nothing new.  We need new challenges. Creativity and innovation is practically impossible without novel experiences. Our brains are never challenged to consider new perspectives or to integrate new information without novelty.  So, let’s bring it to work too.

          One of the participants in my informal survey said that she controls the novelty of what she wears to work each day, so she keeps that interesting. Maybe it’s something that small.

          As I close up I will end with the ever-popular Latin phrase Carpe Diem – Seize the day.

          Your challenge today is to add some novelty – something unexpected and fun into your story. People who actively seek new experiences throughout life live happier, healthier lives. Translation – they live and create better stories.

          What will you do today to make your story more unpredictable? Have fun creating your best life story.

          Remember to head to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com for a link to buy my book LIFE Living Intentional and Fearless Every day. To pick up your LYS T-shirt, to sign up for story coaching or to tune into any of the over 130+ episodes available on just about any topic you can think of for living your best life story.

          Thanks for being here.

           

           

           

           

           

           

           

          ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4208Wed, 03 Jul 2019 09:00:21 -070013:10falsefullBored? Been doing a lot of the same things lately? Talking to a lot of the same people? Dealing with the same old problems? The solution is novelty. Join us for the discussion on why we MUST have novelty in our lives to keep it fun, productive and healthy. This is the stuff good stories are made of.Lori LeeEpisode 143 Suicide Panel: “Stay in Your Body” Part 2Episode 143 Suicide Panel: The plea to “Stay in Your Body” Part 2

          Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast. Today is Part 2 of the Suicide Panel Discussion. If you missed last week’s discussion – go back and grab it – these 4 panelists are a powerhouse, and I must admit, just when I thought I knew what one of them was going to say, they surprised me with a different insight. I put together this panel because of my own shock at what is being called the suicide “epidemic.” It used to be that every once in a while you’d hear about someone taking their own life, but it wasn’t often and it was said in hushed tones. Now, it seems like every week I hear of someone else committing suicide and I’m shocked and filled with questions. What has cause the increase in suicide? Why now? What’s going on out there in battle for our lives?

          We all know that space of feeling disconnected, of being frustrated that life/relationships/career didn’t turn out as we expected. I’m sure at one time or another we’ve all felt alienated. It’s when those feelings of disconnection and alienation combine with the hopelessness that things will never change that suicide has become an all too familiar option. But what is the cause of so much hopelessness?

          
          

          Tune in for the rest of our discussion with this dynamic panel:

          
          

           

          
          

          Cherie Burton

          
          

          has worked as a group counselor at a psychiatric hospital, an addiction recovery center and a behavioral facility for teen boys.  She has stepped away from clinical work to inspire women worldwide to reach their full potential through books, workshops and retreats. Her work as an author, podcaster, international business owner, speaker, mom of 5, emotional release facilitator and leadership development trainer has helped thousands of women magnify their gifts and find wholeness. Cherie’s sister took her own life and this has affected Cherie’s work.

          
          

          Link to Cherie Burton’s podcast: Women Seeking Wholeness – https://cherieburton.com/category/womenseekingwholeness/

          
          

           

          
          

          Ganel-Lyn Condie

          
          

          is a popular motivational speaker – known for inspiring others with her unique honesty, authenticity and spirit. She is dedicated to her family, faith, and inspiring others. Ganel-Lyn loves teaching others with speaking and writing. She has experienced healing from a major chronic illness and is the mother to two miracle children. After the heart-breaking suicide of her 40-year-old sister, Ganel-Lyn is constantly working towards prevention. Ganel-Lyn lives with an open heart and feels passionate about sharing principles that will empower others to live life with more joy. She is a regular television and radio guest. Ganel-Lyn’s talks and books have now encouraged thousands of people all over the world. She loves growing older with her cute husband Rob and aims to keep learning and loving.

          
          

          For links to Ganel-Lyn’s books, talks, and platform: http://www.ganellyn.com/

          
          

           

          
          

          Megan Cook Johnson

          
          

          received a Masters Degree in Social Work from BYU in 2008. She has been a therapist at LDS Family Services for 10 years where her focus has been treating Depression and Anxiety. She had recently been trained in Hypnotherapy and is working on starting a private practice. Megan is the Co-Founder of The Emily Effect Foundation, an organization that honors her late sister Emily and seeks to raise awareness and improve resources for those experiencing Postpartum Mood Disorders.

          
          

          Link to the Emily Effect Foundation: https://theemilyeffect.org/

          
          

           

          
          

          Seth Adam Smith

          
          

          is a best-selling, award-winning author and blogger whose writings have been translated into over...]]>Episode 143 Suicide Panel: The plea to “Stay in Your Body” Part 2

          Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast. Today is Part 2 of the Suicide Panel Discussion. If you missed last week’s discussion – go back and grab it – these 4 panelists are a powerhouse, and I must admit, just when I thought I knew what one of them was going to say, they surprised me with a different insight. I put together this panel because of my own shock at what is being called the suicide “epidemic.” It used to be that every once in a while you’d hear about someone taking their own life, but it wasn’t often and it was said in hushed tones. Now, it seems like every week I hear of someone else committing suicide and I’m shocked and filled with questions. What has cause the increase in suicide? Why now? What’s going on out there in battle for our lives?

          We all know that space of feeling disconnected, of being frustrated that life/relationships/career didn’t turn out as we expected. I’m sure at one time or another we’ve all felt alienated. It’s when those feelings of disconnection and alienation combine with the hopelessness that things will never change that suicide has become an all too familiar option. But what is the cause of so much hopelessness?

          
          

          Tune in for the rest of our discussion with this dynamic panel:

          
          

           

          
          

          Cherie Burton

          
          

          has worked as a group counselor at a psychiatric hospital, an addiction recovery center and a behavioral facility for teen boys.  She has stepped away from clinical work to inspire women worldwide to reach their full potential through books, workshops and retreats. Her work as an author, podcaster, international business owner, speaker, mom of 5, emotional release facilitator and leadership development trainer has helped thousands of women magnify their gifts and find wholeness. Cherie’s sister took her own life and this has affected Cherie’s work.

          
          

          Link to Cherie Burton’s podcast: Women Seeking Wholeness – https://cherieburton.com/category/womenseekingwholeness/

          
          

           

          
          

          Ganel-Lyn Condie

          
          

          is a popular motivational speaker – known for inspiring others with her unique honesty, authenticity and spirit. She is dedicated to her family, faith, and inspiring others. Ganel-Lyn loves teaching others with speaking and writing. She has experienced healing from a major chronic illness and is the mother to two miracle children. After the heart-breaking suicide of her 40-year-old sister, Ganel-Lyn is constantly working towards prevention. Ganel-Lyn lives with an open heart and feels passionate about sharing principles that will empower others to live life with more joy. She is a regular television and radio guest. Ganel-Lyn’s talks and books have now encouraged thousands of people all over the world. She loves growing older with her cute husband Rob and aims to keep learning and loving.

          
          

          For links to Ganel-Lyn’s books, talks, and platform: http://www.ganellyn.com/

          
          

           

          
          

          Megan Cook Johnson

          
          

          received a Masters Degree in Social Work from BYU in 2008. She has been a therapist at LDS Family Services for 10 years where her focus has been treating Depression and Anxiety. She had recently been trained in Hypnotherapy and is working on starting a private practice. Megan is the Co-Founder of The Emily Effect Foundation, an organization that honors her late sister Emily and seeks to raise awareness and improve resources for those experiencing Postpartum Mood Disorders.

          
          

          Link to the Emily Effect Foundation: https://theemilyeffect.org/

          
          

           

          
          

          Seth Adam Smith

          
          

          is a best-selling, award-winning author and blogger whose writings have been translated into over thirty languages and featured on the Huffington Post, Good Morning America, Fox News, CNN, the Today show, Forbes, and many other news outlets around the world. In 2015, his book “Your Life Isn’t for You” was awarded a gold medal for inspirational memoir.

          
          

          A survivor of a suicide attempt in 2006, Seth has become an advocate for resources and understanding concerning depression and suicide prevention, and he regularly writes about these topics in his books and on his blog. He and his family currently live in Arizona.

          
          

          Seth’s Book: Your Life Isn’t For You: https://www.amazon.com/Your-Life-Isnt-You-Selfless/dp/1626560951/ref=sr_1_2?keywords=Seth+Adam+smith&qid=1557957868&s=gateway&sr=8-2

          
          

          This second episode picks up after our introductions to each panel member and their stories. Let’s hop right into the questions.

          
          

          Tune into the audio program for the discussion.

          Thank you for tuning in to this intense and meaningful discussion on the topic of the epidemic of suicide. We’ve talked about connecting with self, about seeing other people beyond ourselves, about healing, about mental illness, about darkness vs. light and the idea of mental warfare between good and evil and so much more. I invite you to share this podcast, to be the hope for someone else, to connect with your own wholeness, to remember that you are a miracle and we all need each other. I invite you to reach out for tools when you are in need, to help remove shame around the topic of suicide so we can be open and find solutions. I invite you to follow or connect with any of these panel members through their books, workshops, blogs, therapy sessions or in any way that you need to. Their contact information will be in the show notes.

          
          

          The human soul is precious – everyone. Stay in the battle finding the moments of joy and fighting through the moments of darkness because there is always hope. Good things always come.

          
          

          Don’t forget your resource –  www.loveyourstorypodcast.com to buy my book LIFE Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday, to listen to all 130+ podcast episodes on all types of topics related to creating your best life story, or to share any of them. We’ll pick up next week with the rest of the discussion.

          
          

           

          ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4200Wed, 19 Jun 2019 09:00:00 -070036:44falsefull143143Today is Part 2 of the Suicide Panel Discussion. This panel is made up of powerful influencers, and I must admit, just when I thought I knew what one of them was going to say, they surprised me with a different insight. I put together this panel because of my own shock at what is being called the suicide “epidemic.” Tune in for Part 2.Lori LeeEpisode 142 Suicide Panel: “Stay in Your Body”Episode 142 Suicide Panel: The plea to “Stay in Your Body”

          According to SAVE – Suicide Awareness and Voices of Education (who uses the most recent data available from the Centers for Disease Control and the World Health Organization) the following facts show us the current state and rate of suicide in the US.

          1. 
             
          2. Suicide is the 10thleading cause of death in the US for all ages. (CDC)
          3. 
             
          4. 
             
          5. Every day, approximately 123 Americans die by suicide. (CDC)
          6. 
             
          7. 
             
          8. There is one death by suicide in the US every 12 minutes. (CDC)
          9. 
             
          10. 
              
          11. Depression affects 20-25%of Americans ages 18+ in a given year. (CDC)
          12. 
              
          13. 
              
          14. Suicide takes the lives of over 44,965 Americans every year.
          15. 
              
          16. 
              
          17. 80% -90% of people that seek treatment for depression are treated successfully using therapy and/or medication.
          18. 
              

          
          

          Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast.

          
          

          Every human soul is precious. We all know that space of feeling disconnected, of being frustrated that life/relationships/career didn’t turn out as we expected. I’m sure at one time or another we’ve all felt alienated. It’s when those feelings of disconnection and alienation combined with the hopelessness that things will never change that suicide has become an all too familiar option.

          
          

          What is the cause of so much hopelessness? Why is suicide so prevalent now that the word ‘epidemic’ has been used to describe it? What is the cause and what is the solution?

          
          

          Today I have an amazing panel put together on the topic of suicide. These men and women have personal experience with suicide – either with family members or in Seth’s case, his own personal experience. We have put this panel together because we care. Because suicide as a supposed solution is out of control and we need to find answers, reduce shame, and shine a light of hope.

          
          

          Let me introduce the panel members and we’ll see if we can answer any of these questions and gain some insight and even hope.

          
          

          Cherie Burton

          
          

          has degrees in psychology and sociology and has worked as a group counselor at a psychiatric hospital, an addiction recovery center and a behavioral facility for teen boys.  She has stepped away from clinical work to inspire women worldwide to reach their full potential through books, workshops and retreats. Her work as an author, podcaster, international business owner, speaker, mom of 5, emotional release facilitator and leadership development trainer has helped thousands of women magnify their gifts and find wholeness. Cherie’s sister took her own life and this has affected Cherie’s work.

          
          

          Link to Cherie Burton’s podcast: Women Seeking Wholeness – https://cherieburton.com/category/womenseekingwholeness/

          
          

           

          
          

          Ganel-Lyn Condie

          
          

          is a popular motivational speaker – known for inspiring others with her unique honesty, authenticity and spirit. She is dedicated to her family, faith, and inspiring others. Ganel-Lyn loves teaching others with speaking and writing. She has experienced healing from a major chronic illness and is the mother to two miracle children. After the heart-breaking suicide of her 40-year-old sister, Ganel-Lyn is constantly working towards prevention. Ganel-Lyn lives with an open heart and feels passionate about sharing principles that will empower others to live life with more joy. She is a regular television and radio guest. Ganel-Lyn’s talks and books have now encouraged thousands of people all over the world. She loves growing older with her cute husband Rob and aims to keep learning and loving.

          
          

          For links to Ganel-Lyn’s books, talks and...]]>Episode 142 Suicide Panel: The plea to “Stay in Your Body”

          According to SAVE – Suicide Awareness and Voices of Education (who uses the most recent data available from the Centers for Disease Control and the World Health Organization) the following facts show us the current state and rate of suicide in the US.

          1. 
             
          2. Suicide is the 10thleading cause of death in the US for all ages. (CDC)
          3. 
             
          4. 
             
          5. Every day, approximately 123 Americans die by suicide. (CDC)
          6. 
             
          7. 
             
          8. There is one death by suicide in the US every 12 minutes. (CDC)
          9. 
             
          10. 
              
          11. Depression affects 20-25%of Americans ages 18+ in a given year. (CDC)
          12. 
              
          13. 
              
          14. Suicide takes the lives of over 44,965 Americans every year.
          15. 
              
          16. 
              
          17. 80% -90% of people that seek treatment for depression are treated successfully using therapy and/or medication.
          18. 
              

          
          

          Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast.

          
          

          Every human soul is precious. We all know that space of feeling disconnected, of being frustrated that life/relationships/career didn’t turn out as we expected. I’m sure at one time or another we’ve all felt alienated. It’s when those feelings of disconnection and alienation combined with the hopelessness that things will never change that suicide has become an all too familiar option.

          
          

          What is the cause of so much hopelessness? Why is suicide so prevalent now that the word ‘epidemic’ has been used to describe it? What is the cause and what is the solution?

          
          

          Today I have an amazing panel put together on the topic of suicide. These men and women have personal experience with suicide – either with family members or in Seth’s case, his own personal experience. We have put this panel together because we care. Because suicide as a supposed solution is out of control and we need to find answers, reduce shame, and shine a light of hope.

          
          

          Let me introduce the panel members and we’ll see if we can answer any of these questions and gain some insight and even hope.

          
          

          Cherie Burton

          
          

          has degrees in psychology and sociology and has worked as a group counselor at a psychiatric hospital, an addiction recovery center and a behavioral facility for teen boys.  She has stepped away from clinical work to inspire women worldwide to reach their full potential through books, workshops and retreats. Her work as an author, podcaster, international business owner, speaker, mom of 5, emotional release facilitator and leadership development trainer has helped thousands of women magnify their gifts and find wholeness. Cherie’s sister took her own life and this has affected Cherie’s work.

          
          

          Link to Cherie Burton’s podcast: Women Seeking Wholeness – https://cherieburton.com/category/womenseekingwholeness/

          
          

           

          
          

          Ganel-Lyn Condie

          
          

          is a popular motivational speaker – known for inspiring others with her unique honesty, authenticity and spirit. She is dedicated to her family, faith, and inspiring others. Ganel-Lyn loves teaching others with speaking and writing. She has experienced healing from a major chronic illness and is the mother to two miracle children. After the heart-breaking suicide of her 40-year-old sister, Ganel-Lyn is constantly working towards prevention. Ganel-Lyn lives with an open heart and feels passionate about sharing principles that will empower others to live life with more joy. She is a regular television and radio guest. Ganel-Lyn’s talks and books have now encouraged thousands of people all over the world. She loves growing older with her cute husband Rob and aims to keep learning and loving.

          
          

          For links to Ganel-Lyn’s books, talks and platform: http://www.ganellyn.com/

          
          

           

          
          

          Megan Cook Johnson

          
          

          received a Masters Degree in Social Work from BYU in 2008. She has been a therapist at LDS Family Services for 10 years where her focus has been treating Depression and Anxiety. She had recently been trained in Hypnotherapy and is working on starting a private practice. Megan is the Co-Founder of The Emily Effect Foundation, an organization that honors her late sister Emily and seeks to raise awareness and improve resources for those experiencing Postpartum Mood Disorders.

          
          

          Link to the Emily Effect Foundation: https://theemilyeffect.org/

          
          

           

          
          

          Seth Adam Smith

          
          

          is a best-selling, award-winning author and blogger whose writings have been translated into over thirty languages and featured on the Huffington Post, Good Morning America, Fox News, CNN, the Today show, Forbes, and many other news outlets around the world. In 2015, his book “Your Life Isn’t for You” was awarded a gold medal for inspirational memoir.

          
          

          A survivor of a suicide attempt in 2006, Seth has become an advocate for resources and understanding concerning depression and suicide prevention, and he regularly writes about these topics in his books and on his blog. He and his family currently live in Arizona.

          
          

          Seth’s Book: Your Life Isn’t For You: https://www.amazon.com/Your-Life-Isnt-You-Selfless/dp/1626560951/ref=sr_1_2?keywords=Seth+Adam+smith&qid=1557957868&s=gateway&sr=8-2

          
          

           

          
          

          Tune into the audio program to hear each of these amazing panel members discuss their thoughts and ideas on the topic of suicide. Did we find some answers? I think we did. This is part one of a two-part series.

          
          

          Tune in next week to hear the full panel discussion as we finish up with Part 2 and the brilliant ideas these panel members share on disconnect, on healing, on hope, and incredible insights into why to stay in your body and fight the good fight.

          
          

          Don’t forget your resource –  www.loveyourstorypodcast.com to buy my book LIFE Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday, to listen to all 130+ podcast episodes on all types of topics related to creating your best life story, or to share any of them. We’ll pick up next week with the rest of the discussion.

          
          

           

          ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4193Wed, 05 Jun 2019 09:00:00 -070050:28falsefull142142We all know those feelings of disconnect, alienation and even hopelessness. These are common human emotions. But what is happening that has propelled the idea of taking your own life as a possible solution? Current suicide rates have been referred to as an epidemic. What's going on? Today I have an amazing panel put together on the topic of suicide. These men and women have personal experience with suicide – either with family members or in Seth’s case, his own personal experience. We have put this panel together because we care. Because suicide as a supposed solution is out of control and we need to find answers, reduce shame, and shine a light of hope.Lori LeeEpisode 141 Healing Body and Mind: Interview Amanda Grow – Part 2Episode 141 Healing Body and Mind:

          Interview Amanda Grow – Part 2

          Welcome to the rest of Amanda Grow’s story.

          Did you know that the United States has the highest maternal mortality rate in the developed world? Because severe childbirth complications have become very rare, it is easy to forget that childbirth can be life threatening. Amanda Grow, a wife and mother of 4 children – 1 daughter and 3 sons, experienced an extremely rare complication of childbirth known as Amniotic Fluid Embolism which has a mortality rate of 80%. Last week you heard about her rapid blood transfusion that nearly drained the hospitals blood supply and left her in a medically induced coma for a week.

          
          

          This week we’ll get more of her story and talk about the importance of healing.

          
          

          Amanda’s story today isn’t just about a miracle and the healing of her body. It’s also about the toll such an event takes on us mentally as well as physically, and today we’re looking at the total process of finding meaning in brokenness and the process of rebuilding.

          
          

          Amanda is the owner of Strategic ACT Prep, a business she built over 10 years that helps high school students prepare for standardized tests. At the time of her medical crisis, she had 12 employees and three locations. The crisis necessitate major life changes as it took many months to regain mental and physical functioning. She and her business partner summoned the courage to shut down all 3 locations and let all the employees go. In the aftermath of the crisi, Amanda has also experienced mental health challenges characterisctic to Post Intensive Care Syndrome, situational drpession, and post traumatic stress. She has also struggled through a deep identity crisis as she no longer has the energy to the “do it all” mo, business owner and community member she once was Amanda has a bachelors degree from Brigham Young University and a Master’s degree from the Univesity of Utah. She and her husband now serve on the Patient and Family Advisory Council for Intermountain Medical Center.

          
          

          In this two-part series we are talking about recovering from accidents, loss, death. Sometimes we may gloss over the real process of climbing out of those dark holes that take us to the brink of strength. Mental and emotional recovery can be significantly harder than a physical recovery. It can be a long road to becoming whole and even then we will most certainly not be the same. Sometimes what must be grieved is the loss of who we were before. This is all a normal part of growth and life. It’s worth the two episodes to get the whole story and to learn about giving ourselves space to heal.

          
          

          Tune into the audio program for the rest of the interview with Amanda.

          
          

          To follow Amanda and her story on Facebook: Miracles for Amanda Grow

          
          

          Your challenge for this week – the same as last week (while we’re on the topic)  is to think about your own journey. Is there a space where you have expected yourself to bounce back more quickly, or expected someone else to bounce back and get back to normal without a sensitivity to the length and depth of the process. Consider what this looks like in your circles and see if there isn’t a place where you need to check in, allow, and nurture, yourself or another.

          
          

          Remember the website – You can go there to get your copy of my new book: LIFE – Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday. The 21 Life Connection Challenges. Or hop on Amazon.

          
          

          On the website you can also buy t-shirts, listen to all the past episodes, and reach out if you would like to contact me. See you next week.

          ]]>Episode 141 Healing Body and Mind:

          Interview Amanda Grow – Part 2

          Welcome to the rest of Amanda Grow’s story.

          Did you know that the United States has the highest maternal mortality rate in the developed world? Because severe childbirth complications have become very rare, it is easy to forget that childbirth can be life threatening. Amanda Grow, a wife and mother of 4 children – 1 daughter and 3 sons, experienced an extremely rare complication of childbirth known as Amniotic Fluid Embolism which has a mortality rate of 80%. Last week you heard about her rapid blood transfusion that nearly drained the hospitals blood supply and left her in a medically induced coma for a week.

          
          

          This week we’ll get more of her story and talk about the importance of healing.

          
          

          Amanda’s story today isn’t just about a miracle and the healing of her body. It’s also about the toll such an event takes on us mentally as well as physically, and today we’re looking at the total process of finding meaning in brokenness and the process of rebuilding.

          
          

          Amanda is the owner of Strategic ACT Prep, a business she built over 10 years that helps high school students prepare for standardized tests. At the time of her medical crisis, she had 12 employees and three locations. The crisis necessitate major life changes as it took many months to regain mental and physical functioning. She and her business partner summoned the courage to shut down all 3 locations and let all the employees go. In the aftermath of the crisi, Amanda has also experienced mental health challenges characterisctic to Post Intensive Care Syndrome, situational drpession, and post traumatic stress. She has also struggled through a deep identity crisis as she no longer has the energy to the “do it all” mo, business owner and community member she once was Amanda has a bachelors degree from Brigham Young University and a Master’s degree from the Univesity of Utah. She and her husband now serve on the Patient and Family Advisory Council for Intermountain Medical Center.

          
          

          In this two-part series we are talking about recovering from accidents, loss, death. Sometimes we may gloss over the real process of climbing out of those dark holes that take us to the brink of strength. Mental and emotional recovery can be significantly harder than a physical recovery. It can be a long road to becoming whole and even then we will most certainly not be the same. Sometimes what must be grieved is the loss of who we were before. This is all a normal part of growth and life. It’s worth the two episodes to get the whole story and to learn about giving ourselves space to heal.

          
          

          Tune into the audio program for the rest of the interview with Amanda.

          
          

          To follow Amanda and her story on Facebook: Miracles for Amanda Grow

          
          

          Your challenge for this week – the same as last week (while we’re on the topic)  is to think about your own journey. Is there a space where you have expected yourself to bounce back more quickly, or expected someone else to bounce back and get back to normal without a sensitivity to the length and depth of the process. Consider what this looks like in your circles and see if there isn’t a place where you need to check in, allow, and nurture, yourself or another.

          
          

          Remember the website – You can go there to get your copy of my new book: LIFE – Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday. The 21 Life Connection Challenges. Or hop on Amazon.

          
          

          On the website you can also buy t-shirts, listen to all the past episodes, and reach out if you would like to contact me. See you next week.

          ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4182Wed, 29 May 2019 09:00:00 -070029:17falsefull141141Join us for Part 2 of the Amanda Grow story. Did you know that the United States has the highest maternal mortality rate in the developed world? Because severe childbirth complications have become very rare, it is easy to forget that childbirth can be life threatening. Amanda Grow, a wife and mother of 4 children, experienced an extremely rare complication of childbirth known as Amniotic Fluid Embolism which has a mortality rate of 80%. Last week you heard about her rapid blood transfusion that nearly drained the hospitals blood supply and left her in a medically induced coma for a week. This week we'll get more of her story and talk about the importance of healing - both body and mind, and grieving the loss of who she was before the ordeal. Sometimes that's one of the most crucial parts of the process. Letting go of what was for what is.Lori LeeEpisode 140 Healing Body and Mind: Interview Amanda Grow – Part 1Episode 140 Healing Body and Mind:

          Interview Amanda Grow – Part 1

          Did you know that the United States has the highest maternal mortality rate in the developed world? Because severe childbirth complications have become very rare, it is easy to forget that childbirth can be life-threatening. Amanda Grow, a wife, and mother of 4 children – 1 daughter and 3 sons, experienced an extremely rare complication of childbirth known as Amniotic Fluid Embolism which has a mortality rate of 80%.

          Amandas story today isn’t just about a miracle and the healing of her body. It’s also about the toll such an event takes on us mentally as well as physically and today we’re looking at the total process of finding meaning in brokenness and the process of rebuilding.

          
          

          Amanda is the owner of Strategic ACT Prep, a business she built over 10 years that helps high school students prepare for standardized tests. At the time of her medical crisis, she had 12 employees and three locations. The crisis necessitate major life changes as it took many months to regain mental and physical functioning. She and her business partner summoned the courage to shut down all 3 locations and let all the employees go. In the aftermath of the crisi, Amanda has also experienced mental health challenges characterisctic to Post Intensive Care Syndrome, situational drpession, and post traumatic stress. She has also struggled through a deep identity crisis as she no longer has the energy to the “do it all” mo, business owner and community member she once was Amanda has a bachelors degree from Brigham Young University and a Master’s degree from the Univesity of Utah. She and her husband now serve on the Patient and Family Advisory Council for Intermountain Medical Center.

          
          

          Tune into the audio program to hear about her rapid blood transfusion that nearly drained the hospital’s blood supply and left her in a medically induced coma for a week.

          
          

          We’ll discuss questions like:

          
          

          You said, “A crisis or trauma is not just one chapter in your life…it is a deep canyon that affects everything going forward from that point.” Tell me a little about that.

          
          

          What do you feel is the most important part of your story?

          
          

          What was your biggest struggle?

          
          

          What has been your most important growth or insight gained?

          
          

          How are you doing now?

          
          

          To follow Amanda on Facebook look for: Miracles for Amanda Grow

          
          

          So often we are talking about recovering from accidents, loss, death….the stories we tell here are always about the victors who find their way out of the dark, and they shine a light for us so that if we are having similar experiences we can learn from their stories. Sometimes is hindsight I think we may gloss over the real process of climbing out of those dark holes that take us to the brink of strength. Mental and emotional recovery is significantly harder than physical recovery. It can be a long road to becoming whole and even then we will most certainly not be the same. Sometimes what must be grieved is the loss of who we were before. This is all a normal part of growth and life.

          
          

          Amanda’s story and feelings about her story focus on these concepts of acknowledging the real journey.

          
          

          Your challenge for this week is to think about your own journey. Is there a space where you have expected yourself to bounce back more quickly, or expected someone else to bounce back and get back to normal without a sensitivity to the length and depth of the process. Consider what this looks like in your circles and see if there isn’t a place where you need to check in, allow, and nurture, yourself or another.

          
          

          Remember the website – You can go there to get your copy of my new book: LIFE – Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday. The 21]]>Episode 140 Healing Body and Mind:

          Interview Amanda Grow – Part 1

          Did you know that the United States has the highest maternal mortality rate in the developed world? Because severe childbirth complications have become very rare, it is easy to forget that childbirth can be life-threatening. Amanda Grow, a wife, and mother of 4 children – 1 daughter and 3 sons, experienced an extremely rare complication of childbirth known as Amniotic Fluid Embolism which has a mortality rate of 80%.

          Amandas story today isn’t just about a miracle and the healing of her body. It’s also about the toll such an event takes on us mentally as well as physically and today we’re looking at the total process of finding meaning in brokenness and the process of rebuilding.

          
          

          Amanda is the owner of Strategic ACT Prep, a business she built over 10 years that helps high school students prepare for standardized tests. At the time of her medical crisis, she had 12 employees and three locations. The crisis necessitate major life changes as it took many months to regain mental and physical functioning. She and her business partner summoned the courage to shut down all 3 locations and let all the employees go. In the aftermath of the crisi, Amanda has also experienced mental health challenges characterisctic to Post Intensive Care Syndrome, situational drpession, and post traumatic stress. She has also struggled through a deep identity crisis as she no longer has the energy to the “do it all” mo, business owner and community member she once was Amanda has a bachelors degree from Brigham Young University and a Master’s degree from the Univesity of Utah. She and her husband now serve on the Patient and Family Advisory Council for Intermountain Medical Center.

          
          

          Tune into the audio program to hear about her rapid blood transfusion that nearly drained the hospital’s blood supply and left her in a medically induced coma for a week.

          
          

          We’ll discuss questions like:

          
          

          You said, “A crisis or trauma is not just one chapter in your life…it is a deep canyon that affects everything going forward from that point.” Tell me a little about that.

          
          

          What do you feel is the most important part of your story?

          
          

          What was your biggest struggle?

          
          

          What has been your most important growth or insight gained?

          
          

          How are you doing now?

          
          

          To follow Amanda on Facebook look for: Miracles for Amanda Grow

          
          

          So often we are talking about recovering from accidents, loss, death….the stories we tell here are always about the victors who find their way out of the dark, and they shine a light for us so that if we are having similar experiences we can learn from their stories. Sometimes is hindsight I think we may gloss over the real process of climbing out of those dark holes that take us to the brink of strength. Mental and emotional recovery is significantly harder than physical recovery. It can be a long road to becoming whole and even then we will most certainly not be the same. Sometimes what must be grieved is the loss of who we were before. This is all a normal part of growth and life.

          
          

          Amanda’s story and feelings about her story focus on these concepts of acknowledging the real journey.

          
          

          Your challenge for this week is to think about your own journey. Is there a space where you have expected yourself to bounce back more quickly, or expected someone else to bounce back and get back to normal without a sensitivity to the length and depth of the process. Consider what this looks like in your circles and see if there isn’t a place where you need to check in, allow, and nurture, yourself or another.

          
          

          Remember the website – You can go there to get your copy of my new book: LIFE – Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday. The 21 Life Connection Challenges. Or hop on Amazon.

          
          

          On the website you can also buy t-shirts, listen to all the past episodes, and reach out if you would like to contact me. See you next week.

          ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4177Wed, 22 May 2019 09:00:00 -070026:56falsefull140140Did you know that the United States has the highest maternal mortality rate in the developed world? Because severe childbirth complications have become very rare, it is easy to forget that childbirth can be life-threatening. Amanda Grow, a wife, and mother of 4 children – 1 daughter and 3 sons, experienced an extremely rare complication of childbirth known as Amniotic Fluid Embolism which has a mortality rate of 80%. Amanda's story today isn’t just about a miracle and the healing of her body. It’s also about the toll such an event takes on us mentally as well as physically, and today we’re looking at the total process of finding meaning in brokenness and the process of rebuilding.Lori LeeEpisode 139 Speak Your Truth – with Guest Co-Host Laurann TurnerEpisode 139 Speak Your Truth

          – with Guest Co-Host Laurann Turner

          Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today is episode 2 with co-host LaurannTurner on deck for another imporatnt LIFE hack conversation.

          Your hosts are:

          Lori Lee – author of LIFE – Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday: the 21 LIFE Connection Challenges

          and

          Laurann Turner  – author of: Every Single Day

          Today we are talking about Speaking Your Truth. What does it mean to speak your truth?

          Barbara De Angelis is an American relationship consultant, lecturer and author, TV personality, relationship, personal growth adviser and spiritual teacher. She said, “Living with integrity means: Not settling for less than what you know you deserve in your relationships. Asking for what you want and need from others. Speaking your truth, even though it might create conflict or tension. Behaving in ways that are in harmony with your personal values. Making choices based on what you believe, and not what others believe.”

           

          I start out this audio conversation by asking Laurann, “What is speaking your truth to you?”

          Tune into the audio program for our important discussion on why you “aren’t Willie Wonka so quit selling sugar.”

          To buy Laurann’s book go to Amazon.com

          Thank you for tuning into the Love Your Story podcast. Please leave us a review on whatever format you listen to your podcasts. We would so appreciate that love from your side of the world.

          ]]>Episode 139 Speak Your Truth

          – with Guest Co-Host Laurann Turner

          Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today is episode 2 with co-host LaurannTurner on deck for another imporatnt LIFE hack conversation.

          Your hosts are:

          Lori Lee – author of LIFE – Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday: the 21 LIFE Connection Challenges

          and

          Laurann Turner  – author of: Every Single Day

          Today we are talking about Speaking Your Truth. What does it mean to speak your truth?

          Barbara De Angelis is an American relationship consultant, lecturer and author, TV personality, relationship, personal growth adviser and spiritual teacher. She said, “Living with integrity means: Not settling for less than what you know you deserve in your relationships. Asking for what you want and need from others. Speaking your truth, even though it might create conflict or tension. Behaving in ways that are in harmony with your personal values. Making choices based on what you believe, and not what others believe.”

           

          I start out this audio conversation by asking Laurann, “What is speaking your truth to you?”

          Tune into the audio program for our important discussion on why you “aren’t Willie Wonka so quit selling sugar.”

          To buy Laurann’s book go to Amazon.com

          Thank you for tuning into the Love Your Story podcast. Please leave us a review on whatever format you listen to your podcasts. We would so appreciate that love from your side of the world.

          ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4168Wed, 15 May 2019 09:00:11 -070028:14falsefullEpisode 139 Speak Your Truth – with Guest Co-Host Laurann Turner Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today is episode 2 with co-host LaurannTurner on deck for another imporatnt LIFE hack conversation. Your hosts are: Lori Lee – author of LIFE – Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday: the 21 LIFE Connection Challenges and Laurann…Lori LeeEpisode 138 You See What You Look For – with Guest Co-Host Laurann TurnerEpisode 138 You See What You Look For –

          with Guest Co-Host Laurann Turner

          Welcome to the Lori and Laurann Series. During the month of May I will have Laurann Turner on to co-host with me on two important life-hack topics.

          Your hosts are:

          Lori Lee – author of LIFE – Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday – the 21 LIFE Connection Challenges

          And

          Laurann Turner  – author of – Every Single Day

          Today we are talking about how you WILL see what you look for. I want you to do an experiment with me. Wherever you are listening to this I want you to look around you for 15 seconds and notice everything that is red …….Okay now close your eyes.

          Tell me everything that you noticed that was blue.

          The first time I did this it clarified this idea of the power of my focus as a person. I could only remember the red because that was exactly what I was focused on. I quickly saw how this applied to other aspects of life.

          If I’m looking for good I’ll find it, at the exclusion of all else. If I’m looking for bad and focusing on the unfair and negative aspect of a situation, I won’t be able to see the good. Stay tuned as Laurann and I kick around the idea.

          Tune into the audio program for our discussion on how you WILL see what you look for. You don’t want to miss it.

          Martha Beck said, “No storyteller can describe everything that ever happens to a hero; as autobiographers, we build our stories from a very limited selection of facts. The information we choose to include or exclude determines whether we see our lives as comedy, tragedy, romance, or adventure.”  In other words, we will create our story by what we look to include in it. Will yours be a tragedy or a comedy? Will it be a love story or an inspirational how-to? You decide.

          To buy Laurann’s book go to Amazon.com

          Thank you for tuning into the Love Your Story podcast. Share this episode with someone who could use it today. Share the love.

          ]]>Episode 138 You See What You Look For –

          with Guest Co-Host Laurann Turner

          Welcome to the Lori and Laurann Series. During the month of May I will have Laurann Turner on to co-host with me on two important life-hack topics.

          Your hosts are:

          Lori Lee – author of LIFE – Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday – the 21 LIFE Connection Challenges

          And

          Laurann Turner  – author of – Every Single Day

          Today we are talking about how you WILL see what you look for. I want you to do an experiment with me. Wherever you are listening to this I want you to look around you for 15 seconds and notice everything that is red …….Okay now close your eyes.

          Tell me everything that you noticed that was blue.

          The first time I did this it clarified this idea of the power of my focus as a person. I could only remember the red because that was exactly what I was focused on. I quickly saw how this applied to other aspects of life.

          If I’m looking for good I’ll find it, at the exclusion of all else. If I’m looking for bad and focusing on the unfair and negative aspect of a situation, I won’t be able to see the good. Stay tuned as Laurann and I kick around the idea.

          Tune into the audio program for our discussion on how you WILL see what you look for. You don’t want to miss it.

          Martha Beck said, “No storyteller can describe everything that ever happens to a hero; as autobiographers, we build our stories from a very limited selection of facts. The information we choose to include or exclude determines whether we see our lives as comedy, tragedy, romance, or adventure.”  In other words, we will create our story by what we look to include in it. Will yours be a tragedy or a comedy? Will it be a love story or an inspirational how-to? You decide.

          To buy Laurann’s book go to Amazon.com

          Thank you for tuning into the Love Your Story podcast. Share this episode with someone who could use it today. Share the love.

          ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4162Wed, 08 May 2019 09:00:21 -070017:35falsefullLife Hack: You will see what you look for. If you want to be happy, look at the things that make you happy because those are the things that will then be magnified. If you're focusing on what's wrong instead of what's right, the wrong becomes magnified in your story, in your life, and in your mind. This is one of the easiest ways to direct your life. Tune in for my discussion with guest co-host Laurann Turner, author of Every Single Day.Lori LeeEpisode 137 Interview Christine McAlister: The Crossroads – Which path does your story take?Episode 137 Interview Christine McAlister – The Crossroads – Which path does your story take?

          Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today I want to start out with a question: Have you ever had something really horrible happen in your life, and you came to the understanding that your story could go one of two ways – you could hide, wallow, wear the cloak of victimhood, lose yourself in the sadness or self-loathing or embarrassment, or whatever emotion was kicking your ass at the time, or you could write a life story with a resilient main character? When I talk about this I know it sounds a little flippant as if doing this is easy and must be done, but the truth is that it’s anything but easy. It’s the space where the battle is waged in our hearts and minds, but the outcome is what determines if our story is a tragedy, a comedy, and inspirational how-to.  That crossroads is a crucial space in all stories. Today my guest is Christine McAlister, a woman who gave birth to a full-term stillborn daughter and stood staring at this very crossroads. “I would have much rather died,” she said to me.  Stay tuned for her story and struggle at the crossroads.

           

          Christine McAlister and her husband and “rainbow baby,” Fiora, live with their 2 rescue dogs, near their Arabian horses, in Louisville, Kentucky. She is a lover of books and stories and an entrepreneur, business coach, and the author of the #1 bestseller The Income Replacement Formula: Seven Simple Steps To Doing What You Love And Making Six Figures From Anywhere. An expert on turning tragedy into triumph, she founded her company, Life With Passion, after the full-term stillbirth of her first daughter, Maeve. She’s been featured in Inc., Business Insider, The Huffington Post, and the Entrepreneurs On Fire podcast. Christine is a big self-knowledge junky and she helps high-achievers all over the world to replace their incomes and ditch their 9-5s, by building businesses out of their passions.

          Join me on the audio program to hear Christine’s story of birthing a stillborn child and how she decided which crossroads to take.

          To follow Christine:

           

          Founder, Life With Passion
          Join us now at The Passionate & Profitable Entrepreneur Society, a cozy, supportive Facebook group for women chasing their big dreams!

          The Income Replacement Formula: 7 Simple Steps to Doing What You Love & Making Six Figures From Anywhere is now available on Amazon!

           

          Your challenge this week:

          Walt Whitman said, “Happiness, not in another place, but this place…not for another hour, but this hour…” What story could you reframe – if it were possible to reframe it, where you would shift you from a place of victim to resilient hero/heroin?

          Share this episode with someone who could use it today. And don’t forget you can find my book: LIFE – Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday on Amazon or on the website: www.loveyourstorypodcast.com

          See you next week on the Love Your Story podcast.

           

           

           

          .

           

          ]]>Episode 137 Interview Christine McAlister – The Crossroads – Which path does your story take?

          Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today I want to start out with a question: Have you ever had something really horrible happen in your life, and you came to the understanding that your story could go one of two ways – you could hide, wallow, wear the cloak of victimhood, lose yourself in the sadness or self-loathing or embarrassment, or whatever emotion was kicking your ass at the time, or you could write a life story with a resilient main character? When I talk about this I know it sounds a little flippant as if doing this is easy and must be done, but the truth is that it’s anything but easy. It’s the space where the battle is waged in our hearts and minds, but the outcome is what determines if our story is a tragedy, a comedy, and inspirational how-to.  That crossroads is a crucial space in all stories. Today my guest is Christine McAlister, a woman who gave birth to a full-term stillborn daughter and stood staring at this very crossroads. “I would have much rather died,” she said to me.  Stay tuned for her story and struggle at the crossroads.

           

          Christine McAlister and her husband and “rainbow baby,” Fiora, live with their 2 rescue dogs, near their Arabian horses, in Louisville, Kentucky. She is a lover of books and stories and an entrepreneur, business coach, and the author of the #1 bestseller The Income Replacement Formula: Seven Simple Steps To Doing What You Love And Making Six Figures From Anywhere. An expert on turning tragedy into triumph, she founded her company, Life With Passion, after the full-term stillbirth of her first daughter, Maeve. She’s been featured in Inc., Business Insider, The Huffington Post, and the Entrepreneurs On Fire podcast. Christine is a big self-knowledge junky and she helps high-achievers all over the world to replace their incomes and ditch their 9-5s, by building businesses out of their passions.

          Join me on the audio program to hear Christine’s story of birthing a stillborn child and how she decided which crossroads to take.

          To follow Christine:

           

          Founder, Life With Passion
          Join us now at The Passionate & Profitable Entrepreneur Society, a cozy, supportive Facebook group for women chasing their big dreams!

          The Income Replacement Formula: 7 Simple Steps to Doing What You Love & Making Six Figures From Anywhere is now available on Amazon!

           

          Your challenge this week:

          Walt Whitman said, “Happiness, not in another place, but this place…not for another hour, but this hour…” What story could you reframe – if it were possible to reframe it, where you would shift you from a place of victim to resilient hero/heroin?

          Share this episode with someone who could use it today. And don’t forget you can find my book: LIFE – Living Intentional and Fearless Everyday on Amazon or on the website: www.loveyourstorypodcast.com

          See you next week on the Love Your Story podcast.

           

           

           

          .

           

          ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4159Wed, 01 May 2019 09:00:20 -070028:42falsefullHave you ever had something really horrible happen in your life, and you came to the understanding that your story could go one of two ways – you could hide, wallow, wear the cloak of victimhood, lose yourself in the sadness or self-loathing or embarrassment, or whatever emotion was kicking your ass at the time, or you could write a life story with a resilient main character? Today I talk with Christine McAlister as she tells her story of the full-term stillbirth of her first daughter and the crossroads she stood at. This episode is about the crossroads we all have to stand at in our lives.Lori LeeEpisode 136 Am I Worthy of Happiness? Love? Being Treated Well?Episode 136 Am I Worthy of Happiness? Love? Being Treated Well?

          In 1992 Wayne’s World came out. A silly show about 2 slacker friends who are trying to promote their cable show. One of their famous cult lines is “We’re not worthy.” They would sing out this phrase whenever something particularly good happened. We used to use this saying to elicit a laugh within our group of friends. I don’t know if any of us ever actually felt that way, we were just goofing around and being silly, but as I talk with people as I do my current work with story one of the primary issues that repeatedly pops up is that many people feel unworthy. Unworthy of good love. Unworthy of a good life. Unworthy of being treated well. They play small because they feel they deserve to be disregarded, heck they don’t deserve something better.  Whether it’s a voice in their head that capitalizes on mistakes they’ve made, or something they have marinated in over the years as others made thoughtless comments, these feelings are no joke. They create small lives and relationships where people feel like they deserve to be treated badly. Let’s talk about why the idea of unworthiness is a lie – in EVERY case.

           

          Am I worthy? Sometimes this isn’t even a question we ask ourselves, it’s just a sense – a feeling we harbor that influences whether we dare to think big, act big, and demand respectful treatment.

          I think the first question is… worthy of what? Am I worthy to be loved? Am I worthy to be treated well? Am I worthy of happiness? Am I worthy of good fortune?

          One of the ways that I test an idea is comparing the light it brings. Let me explain:

          Often times the idea of “worthiness” has something to do with God. Worthiness and God have been linked for as long as we have records/scripture.

          So here is the question I ask myself. Does God want us to live small – beneath our capability? Does God want us settling for unhappy, abusive or dark situations because we’ve deemed ourselves unworthy?

          One distinct scripture comes to mind: “The worth of souls is great in the sight of God.”

          Notice it did not say the worth of a clean soul or a perfect soul is great in the sight of God….no it said the WORTH of a soul is great.

          If God deems the worth of every soul as great do you think that changes because someone else on this planet told you you weren’t worth much? No. Who do you believe? God or the other?

          Who creates feelings of self-doubt and unworthiness – would that ever be God? Does that create light or love? No.

          One of my favorite scriptures is 2Timothy 1 – “For God does not give us the spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.

          We are worthy simply because we are children of God. Any other feeling is NOT from him. Our worthiness is not even dependent upon our actions or the side of the tracks we come from, or what other people think of us or say about us. We are worthy of love, happiness, and all good things because we are here.

           

          I asked Laurann Turner, the author of Every Single Day and proponent of self-love and acceptance — you’ll remember her from an episode last month– about the idea of worthiness, we ended up in a big conversation.

           

          Tune into the audio program for our conversation.

          We are worthy, YOU are worthy, just as you are, to lift your eyes to the light, to seek after good things, to embrace all you are and can be, and go make great things happen. You are worthy of happiness. No one, no action, no way of being can take that away from you. You are worthy of being treated well and expecting that treatment. You are worthy of your greatest happiness.

          In the Doctrine and Covenants 71:6 – a scripture—it says, “For unto him that receiveth it shall be given more abundantly, even power.”

          This tells me we need to accept our own worthiness as a child of God. That we need to accept the gifts]]>Episode 136 Am I Worthy of Happiness? Love? Being Treated Well?

          In 1992 Wayne’s World came out. A silly show about 2 slacker friends who are trying to promote their cable show. One of their famous cult lines is “We’re not worthy.” They would sing out this phrase whenever something particularly good happened. We used to use this saying to elicit a laugh within our group of friends. I don’t know if any of us ever actually felt that way, we were just goofing around and being silly, but as I talk with people as I do my current work with story one of the primary issues that repeatedly pops up is that many people feel unworthy. Unworthy of good love. Unworthy of a good life. Unworthy of being treated well. They play small because they feel they deserve to be disregarded, heck they don’t deserve something better.  Whether it’s a voice in their head that capitalizes on mistakes they’ve made, or something they have marinated in over the years as others made thoughtless comments, these feelings are no joke. They create small lives and relationships where people feel like they deserve to be treated badly. Let’s talk about why the idea of unworthiness is a lie – in EVERY case.

           

          Am I worthy? Sometimes this isn’t even a question we ask ourselves, it’s just a sense – a feeling we harbor that influences whether we dare to think big, act big, and demand respectful treatment.

          I think the first question is… worthy of what? Am I worthy to be loved? Am I worthy to be treated well? Am I worthy of happiness? Am I worthy of good fortune?

          One of the ways that I test an idea is comparing the light it brings. Let me explain:

          Often times the idea of “worthiness” has something to do with God. Worthiness and God have been linked for as long as we have records/scripture.

          So here is the question I ask myself. Does God want us to live small – beneath our capability? Does God want us settling for unhappy, abusive or dark situations because we’ve deemed ourselves unworthy?

          One distinct scripture comes to mind: “The worth of souls is great in the sight of God.”

          Notice it did not say the worth of a clean soul or a perfect soul is great in the sight of God….no it said the WORTH of a soul is great.

          If God deems the worth of every soul as great do you think that changes because someone else on this planet told you you weren’t worth much? No. Who do you believe? God or the other?

          Who creates feelings of self-doubt and unworthiness – would that ever be God? Does that create light or love? No.

          One of my favorite scriptures is 2Timothy 1 – “For God does not give us the spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.

          We are worthy simply because we are children of God. Any other feeling is NOT from him. Our worthiness is not even dependent upon our actions or the side of the tracks we come from, or what other people think of us or say about us. We are worthy of love, happiness, and all good things because we are here.

           

          I asked Laurann Turner, the author of Every Single Day and proponent of self-love and acceptance — you’ll remember her from an episode last month– about the idea of worthiness, we ended up in a big conversation.

           

          Tune into the audio program for our conversation.

          We are worthy, YOU are worthy, just as you are, to lift your eyes to the light, to seek after good things, to embrace all you are and can be, and go make great things happen. You are worthy of happiness. No one, no action, no way of being can take that away from you. You are worthy of being treated well and expecting that treatment. You are worthy of your greatest happiness.

          In the Doctrine and Covenants 71:6 – a scripture—it says, “For unto him that receiveth it shall be given more abundantly, even power.”

          This tells me we need to accept our own worthiness as a child of God. That we need to accept the gifts he has for us, and we need to keep accepting the joy and right to create a beautiful life that is inherently ours.

          Your challenge this week is to think about what spaces in your life you might feel unworthy of really good things. Follow that thought train backward and discover where that feeling comes from, and then kick that feeling out. Practice shifting into the things we’ve learned today – the proof that the worth of our souls is great. That God does NOT give us the spirit of fear but of power and love and a sound mind, and that as we receive all the good that is inherently for us we will be given even more abundantly. Love ourselves is a crucial key before we can truly love others. Accepting our own deep worthiness for living our biggest and best story on purpose – changes everything! You ARE worthy. Now live like it.

          www.loveyoustorypodcast.com has all past episodes, you can buy t-shirts, you can buy the 21 LIFE Connection challenges book or reach out to me. See you next week! Live a Great Story!

           

          ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4153Wed, 24 Apr 2019 09:00:40 -070035:15falsefullEpisode 136 Am I Worthy of Happiness? Love? Being Treated Well? In 1992 Wayne’s World came out. A silly show about 2 slacker friends who are trying to promote their cable show. One of their famous cult lines is “We’re not worthy.” They would sing out this phrase whenever something particularly good happened. We used…Lori LeeEpisode 135 Divorce PanelEpisode 135 Divorce Panel

          Marriage and divorce are both common experiences. According to the American Psychological Association, in Western cultures, more than 90 percent of people marry by age 50. This is healthy and desirable both mentally and physically when the relationship is healthy. But 40-50% of marriages in the US end in divorce with the rates being even higher for subsequent marriages.

          But let’s be clear…none of us got married with the intention of getting divorced. Suffice it to say, we can all say, “I never thought I’d be here.”

          I see this comment a lot on online dating profiles in the online dating realm. Other comments I see often include “just trying to make it through,” “I love my family more than anything.” “my kids are my whole world,” and “I like to laugh, have fun, and I’m looking for someone with a sense of humor.”

          The first two quotes establish the rocky and difficult nature of the path divorce shoves us onto; a path we didn’t plan for, a path full of pain, and loss of life expectations, a path of destruction. The third and fourth quotes emphatically state loyalties and responsibility as we cling to the loves of our lives, our children, trying o keep them steady on the path adult decisions have forced upon them and keep our own hearts from hemorrhaging any further with loss of time, connection with blood of our blood and bone of our bone; our babies.  And the last quote speaks to a need to rebuild, to find hope, to laugh again and to laugh with someone.  This podcast episode will look more deeply at these three areas.

          Sometimes divorce is selfishness, messy betrayals, and a path through hell. Some divorces are more amicable, but it is still the destruction of a partnership that at one time held hope and dreams. Sometimes divorce is because we are too lazy to get unselfish and grow, but sometimes walking away has nothing to do with weakness and everything to do with strength.

          For any of you who know my story – you know that my divorces are the basis for the entire Love Your Story podcast. My story is told in 3 video segments on the Love Your Story website, but in a nutshell, my feelings of failure and the shame that accompanied that did not create a story I loved or was at peace with. I had to reframe my story of failure by focusing on the things I learned and the things those lessons prepared me for. I focused on my growth and the fact that I did the best I could at the time and so did the others involved. My new focus was on acceptance, and allowing, and moving forward with faith and hope in better things.

          Today I have a panel of five adults who have gone through a divorce. Three men and two women. I will be the mediator of the panel and will ask the questions. Each one of these people has had very different experiences, but today we are here to hear what they learned and what they would do over again and what they wouldn’t.  Let me introduce the panel members:

          1. Doug L. is from Colorado. He was married for 24 years and has been divorced for about a year and a half. He says he got divorced because his wife told him they were getting divorced – there’s also a little diverging religion and a roving eye on her part, but we’ll keep the details minimal. He says he likes walks on the beach, sunsets and kittens. Turn-offs are vegetarians and neighbors who let their dogs poop on his front lawn, and hairy backs (not sure if that is on men or women.)
          2. Jae B. was originally from Colorado, spent his first marriage years in Texas, and a few years ago moved to Utah to be close to his children. He has been married twice. He had 3 children with his first wife, who he was married to for 13 years. His second marriage was mix of 7 kids and lasted 2 years.
          3. Kathy S has been married and divorced twice. She has 3 children – 1 with her first husband and 2 with her second. She says her first marriage...]]>Episode 135 Divorce Panel

             Marriage and divorce are both common experiences. According to the American Psychological Association, in Western cultures, more than 90 percent of people marry by age 50. This is healthy and desirable both mentally and physically when the relationship is healthy. But 40-50% of marriages in the US end in divorce with the rates being even higher for subsequent marriages.

             But let’s be clear…none of us got married with the intention of getting divorced. Suffice it to say, we can all say, “I never thought I’d be here.”

             I see this comment a lot on online dating profiles in the online dating realm. Other comments I see often include “just trying to make it through,” “I love my family more than anything.” “my kids are my whole world,” and “I like to laugh, have fun, and I’m looking for someone with a sense of humor.”

             The first two quotes establish the rocky and difficult nature of the path divorce shoves us onto; a path we didn’t plan for, a path full of pain, and loss of life expectations, a path of destruction. The third and fourth quotes emphatically state loyalties and responsibility as we cling to the loves of our lives, our children, trying o keep them steady on the path adult decisions have forced upon them and keep our own hearts from hemorrhaging any further with loss of time, connection with blood of our blood and bone of our bone; our babies.  And the last quote speaks to a need to rebuild, to find hope, to laugh again and to laugh with someone.  This podcast episode will look more deeply at these three areas.

             Sometimes divorce is selfishness, messy betrayals, and a path through hell. Some divorces are more amicable, but it is still the destruction of a partnership that at one time held hope and dreams. Sometimes divorce is because we are too lazy to get unselfish and grow, but sometimes walking away has nothing to do with weakness and everything to do with strength.

             For any of you who know my story – you know that my divorces are the basis for the entire Love Your Story podcast. My story is told in 3 video segments on the Love Your Story website, but in a nutshell, my feelings of failure and the shame that accompanied that did not create a story I loved or was at peace with. I had to reframe my story of failure by focusing on the things I learned and the things those lessons prepared me for. I focused on my growth and the fact that I did the best I could at the time and so did the others involved. My new focus was on acceptance, and allowing, and moving forward with faith and hope in better things.

             Today I have a panel of five adults who have gone through a divorce. Three men and two women. I will be the mediator of the panel and will ask the questions. Each one of these people has had very different experiences, but today we are here to hear what they learned and what they would do over again and what they wouldn’t.  Let me introduce the panel members:

             1. Doug L. is from Colorado. He was married for 24 years and has been divorced for about a year and a half. He says he got divorced because his wife told him they were getting divorced – there’s also a little diverging religion and a roving eye on her part, but we’ll keep the details minimal. He says he likes walks on the beach, sunsets and kittens. Turn-offs are vegetarians and neighbors who let their dogs poop on his front lawn, and hairy backs (not sure if that is on men or women.)
             2. Jae B. was originally from Colorado, spent his first marriage years in Texas, and a few years ago moved to Utah to be close to his children. He has been married twice. He had 3 children with his first wife, who he was married to for 13 years. His second marriage was mix of 7 kids and lasted 2 years.
             3. Kathy S has been married and divorced twice. She has 3 children – 1 with her first husband and 2 with her second. She says her first marriage failed because neither us them were really mature enough to see past their own wants and needs, and the second because her husband chose a different path.
             4. Robb B was married for 15 years and has been single for 6 years. He has 3 children and attributes his divorce to neglect, his wife finding a new boyfriend, a lack of communicating of needs and stress.
             5. Rebekah B was married to her first husband for almost 16 years. She says her marriage failed because they didn’t have similar life goals or a vision for the future. She had a brief second marriage that lasted 2 weeks – she ended it when she found out he wasn’t honest with her.
             
             

             So let’s jump in with the questions. I’ll ask each 3 of the participants to answer each question: (Tune into the audio program to hear their answers)

             1. What did you learn from marriage and divorce?
             2. What would you do differently?
             3. What would you do all over again?
             4. What advice would you give people who are considering divorce?
             5. What has been the hardest part of divorce?
             6. What helped you most during the darkest times?
             
             

              

             The American Psychological Association has a few tips on marriage and divorce, and as we end this episode I’ll share their ideas:

             1. Separation and divorce are emotionally difficult, but it IS possible to have healthy breakups. Don’t buy into the story that you need to be the biggest possible ass because you’re hurt. Rise above your lower self regardless of the actions of the ex-partner.
             2. Tips for keeping your current romantic relationship healthy include: talking openly, keeping it interesting and seeking help if needed. They point out that every relationship has ups and downs, but some factors are more likely than others to create bumps in a relationship. Finances and parenting decisions often create recurring conflicts, for example. One sign of a problem is having repeated versions of the same fight over and over. In such cases, psychologists can help couples improve communication and find healthy ways to move beyond the conflict.
             3. Research on what makes a marriage work shows that people in a good marriage have completed these psychological “tasks”:
             
             

              

             • Separate emotionally from the family you grew up in; not to the point of estrangement, but enough so that your identity is separate from that of your parents and siblings.
             • Build togetherness based on a shared intimacy and identity, while at the same time set boundaries to protect each partner’s autonomy.
             • Establish a rich and pleasurable sexual relationship and protect it from the intrusions of the workplace and family obligations.
             • For couples with children, embrace the daunting roles of parenthood and absorb the impact of a baby’s entrance into the marriage. Learn to continue the work of protecting the privacy of you and your spouse as a couple.
             • Confront and master the inevitable crises of life.
             • Maintain the strength of the marital bond in the face of adversity. The marriage should be a safe haven in which partners are able to express their differences, anger, and conflict.
             • Use humor and laughter to keep things in perspective and to avoid boredom and isolation.
             • Nurture and comfort each other, satisfying each partner’s needs for dependency and offering continuing encouragement and support.
             • Keep alive the early romantic, idealized images of falling in love, while facing the sober realities of the changes wrought by time.
             
             

             Thanks to Judith S. Wallerstein, PhD, co-author of the book “The Good Marriage: How and Why Love Lasts” for these stats and suggestions.

             With that I will say adieu. Thanks for being here for open discussions about life and how to create your best life story on purpose. Share this episode with someone you know who might need it or enjoy it. Share the love, people. Remember loveyourstorypodcast.com for access to all the 120+ episodes and to the tools and online courses for reframing old stories that are holding you back or jumping into the 21 LIFE Connection Challenges for actively creating more connection, self-care, and possibility in your life moving forward.  See you next week.

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4147Wed, 17 Apr 2019 09:00:30 -070043:57falsefullMarriage and divorce are both common experiences in our culture. Ninety percent of people get married by the time they are 50, and 40-50% end up divorced. None of us get married with the intention of getting divorced, so traversing this slippery mountain slope is not something any of us come prepared for. Today I have asked 5 people who have been through divorce to sit on a panel and share their stories and advice on the topic of divorce. Tune in for some wisdom from people who have walked the path - Doug, Kathy, Jae, Rebekah, and Robb.Lori LeeEpisode 134 Living Intentional and Fearless Every dayEpisode 134 Living Intentional and Fearless Every day

              

             Eleanor Roosevelt said, “in the long run, we shape our lives, and we shape ourselves. The process never ends until we die. And the choices we make are ultimately our own responsibility.”

             In other words: Happiness is an inside job and we are VERY POWERFUL beings. Today we are going to talk about what it means to live intentionally and fearless and I’m going to tell you about a new tool to help you jump into that feet first.

             I was on a podcast interview with Emily and Erik Orton from New York last week. They are the authors of the book Seven at Sea. He is a screenwriter and one of his productions flopped – stayed open for only 5 weeks, and he had to take a temporary job in a high rise. His job gave him a view out the window of the Hudson River and he used to watch the sailboats sailing by. He started dreaming about what it would look like to learn to sail; to live life on your own terms. He wasn’t from the class of people who usually sail. His wife, Emily who stayed at home with their 5 kids, had a fear of deep water, but one step at a time they considered What Could Go Right instead of What Might Go Wrong. Soon enough they had learned how to sail, taught their children, and they found themselves living on a sailboat for a year as they traveled 5000 miles from New York to the Carribean and back. This was all done despite having very limited funds, their youngest daughter was down syndrome, and none of them had any background in sailing.

             I loved this interview because when I asked them what their big takeaway from this incredible life adventure was, Emily answered that she found 3 types of confidence:  1. She learned to trust herself because she did what she set out to do. 2. Competence: She learned new skills on this adventure so she had an increased sense of Competence – how to rig, how to find food in completely unknown places, a hundred new things she learned how to do.  3. She gained a sense of comfort with uncertainty.  They learned after weeks and months of sailing to new islands, not knowing their way around, not knowing where food would be on each island, not having a crystal ball about weather, or having all the answers…..they learned to trust that things would emerge and they would find their way.

             Erik said – “We will not know all the answers when we begin, and that’s okay. Now we know we will figure them out.”

             This last one was my favorite because it was the learned skill and choice or FAITH OVER FEAR.

             I saw an ad in an Oprah magazine many years ago, it said, “Every woman has a story. It’s not how you tell it, it’s how you live it.”

             The Love Your Story platform has 3 parts: 1. The Past: Most of us have stories from our past that hold us back. Those stories hold shame, or a deep sense of victimhood, or unworthiness, or regret. Until we learn to reframe these we stay stuck in places that we can’t progress past. I work with clients to help them reframe their stories. 2. The Present: When I did my original presentation to this group last year I talked about this aspect of story – the stories that we are telling ourselves right now and the importance of recognizing the negative ones that eat away at our confidence, worthiness and engagement with the world. These are critical to recognize and manage. 3. The Future – this is my focus for today’s discussion – taking action – living intentional and fearless to create the story line you want to tell, the story line you want to live. This requires intention and courage.

             We do lots of this – fighting against the fear and self doubt. What’s one thing you’re doing to live intentional? To live fearless?

              

             We are not pawns of life. We are the creators of our stories and by living intentional and fearless every day we can write a story that brings us fierce joy, pride in our risings, and...]]>Episode 134 Living Intentional and Fearless Every day

              

             Eleanor Roosevelt said, “in the long run, we shape our lives, and we shape ourselves. The process never ends until we die. And the choices we make are ultimately our own responsibility.”

             In other words: Happiness is an inside job and we are VERY POWERFUL beings. Today we are going to talk about what it means to live intentionally and fearless and I’m going to tell you about a new tool to help you jump into that feet first.

             I was on a podcast interview with Emily and Erik Orton from New York last week. They are the authors of the book Seven at Sea. He is a screenwriter and one of his productions flopped – stayed open for only 5 weeks, and he had to take a temporary job in a high rise. His job gave him a view out the window of the Hudson River and he used to watch the sailboats sailing by. He started dreaming about what it would look like to learn to sail; to live life on your own terms. He wasn’t from the class of people who usually sail. His wife, Emily who stayed at home with their 5 kids, had a fear of deep water, but one step at a time they considered What Could Go Right instead of What Might Go Wrong. Soon enough they had learned how to sail, taught their children, and they found themselves living on a sailboat for a year as they traveled 5000 miles from New York to the Carribean and back. This was all done despite having very limited funds, their youngest daughter was down syndrome, and none of them had any background in sailing.

             I loved this interview because when I asked them what their big takeaway from this incredible life adventure was, Emily answered that she found 3 types of confidence:  1. She learned to trust herself because she did what she set out to do. 2. Competence: She learned new skills on this adventure so she had an increased sense of Competence – how to rig, how to find food in completely unknown places, a hundred new things she learned how to do.  3. She gained a sense of comfort with uncertainty.  They learned after weeks and months of sailing to new islands, not knowing their way around, not knowing where food would be on each island, not having a crystal ball about weather, or having all the answers…..they learned to trust that things would emerge and they would find their way.

             Erik said – “We will not know all the answers when we begin, and that’s okay. Now we know we will figure them out.”

             This last one was my favorite because it was the learned skill and choice or FAITH OVER FEAR.

             I saw an ad in an Oprah magazine many years ago, it said, “Every woman has a story. It’s not how you tell it, it’s how you live it.”

             The Love Your Story platform has 3 parts: 1. The Past: Most of us have stories from our past that hold us back. Those stories hold shame, or a deep sense of victimhood, or unworthiness, or regret. Until we learn to reframe these we stay stuck in places that we can’t progress past. I work with clients to help them reframe their stories. 2. The Present: When I did my original presentation to this group last year I talked about this aspect of story – the stories that we are telling ourselves right now and the importance of recognizing the negative ones that eat away at our confidence, worthiness and engagement with the world. These are critical to recognize and manage. 3. The Future – this is my focus for today’s discussion – taking action – living intentional and fearless to create the story line you want to tell, the story line you want to live. This requires intention and courage.

             We do lots of this – fighting against the fear and self doubt. What’s one thing you’re doing to live intentional? To live fearless?

              

             We are not pawns of life. We are the creators of our stories and by living intentional and fearless every day we can write a story that brings us fierce joy, pride in our risings, and treasure troves beyond what we may realize we are capable of. We can do this because the universe has our back, and when you are standing up and stepping into the arena, running toward the fear and watching it disappear…well, that’s when the magic happens. That’s when you stand in your power, create possibility, and shine.

             Henry David Thoreau said, “When you achieve your dreams, it’s not so much what you get, as what you become while achieving it.”

             The best stories are not about characters who are binge watching Netflix. They aren’t even about people who have found a comfortable place to sort of not rock the boat – even though most of the time that is what we humans are searching for – that sweet, comfortable spot– no, the best storylines, the best movies, the best books are those when the character wants something bad enough that they are willing to overcome the obstacles in front of them to get it. Those stories show growth and the characters change as they stretch and often face things they don’t want to face. But to do this we often need what Emily was talking about – that sense of comfort with uncertainty. The knowing that we won’t know how to do everything and we won’t know how the story will end, but we will still take action and move forward. We will act in faith.

             Let me share some examples with you:

             First an example of reframing tragedy:

             In episode 83 Wendy Garret was in a scooter accident where one of her legs was paralyzed, when I asked her, toward the end of the interview if she would undo the accident if she could, she said no because without the paralysis of her leg she wouldn’t have been able to qualify for the seven largest world marathons. Her tragedy had become a ticket to experiences she was so pleased that she could have. She intentionally choose to amplify her story with action. She created an interesting story and turned tragedy into triumph.

             I share this because when we know that we even in through life’s dark experiences we can choose to see light, there is increased faith rather than fear.

             Example of Intentional living:

             In episode 23 with Marvin Castler who decided to live his life on his own terms. He chooses to live in a storage shed and drive a prius to save money so he can hike all summer – living out on the trails – the Pacific Crest Trail, the Appalachian Trail, the Continental Divide trail and many others. During the winter he teaches 3^rd grade and travels to University of Arizona Wildcat games as the SuperFan – painted face, blue beard and all . He’s got a story – a story written from his own personal desires to hike, be in touch with nature, play big as a Super Fan. He acts and creates his own personal lifestyle – a story all his own, and it IS interesting.

             Example of Intentional and Fearless Creation

             In episode 115 Sara Dean took her struggle with infertility and created the Shameless Mom Academy podcast. She was finally able to get pregnant with her son, but no other fertilization efforts brought her anymore children, so she channeled her love and the extra time she felt she had because of raising only 1 child, into a podcast to support and inspire other moms around the world.

             These three examples show people intentionally writing a life story on their own terms. Turning what first felt like tragedy into something beautiful and fulfilling, or in Marvin’s case, just intentionally building a unique storyline all his own.

             Now – I want to qualify the word FEARLESS – I don’t mean that we don’t feel fear when we face something new, something we don’t know how to do, something that pushes our buttons regarding the fear of rejection, or the fear of failure, or the fear of public humiliation, or the fear of loss, or the fear of wasting time or money – we definitely feel the fear – but by FEARLESS I mean we work out that muscle and we FEAR LESS. Each time we face a fear and see our own growth and experiences in tough places we increase our faith in ourselves, in the Universal way of things, in God, and decrease our fear.  That makes us incredibly powerful!

             What about if we feel like what we want doesn’t look like everyone else’s story?

             One of the most beautiful and exciting things about us humans is how individual we all are. In the scriptures, God tells us that we are to give the beggar what he wants not what we think he deserves or needs. I’ve always found this interesting. I bring this up because to me it illustrates that God cares about us individually, and he cares what WE want. The crazy type of life we each want to live is totally legit. There’s not just one way to do it. We often get ourselves caught up in all the shoulds and musts that are imposed by a cultural expectation, but once we are bold enough to see past those – past the “one way of doing things,” –to deviate, our own true style and heart can break out. This is beautiful and exciting because it’s something different and unique for everyone. And there is so much satisfaction in that type of life creation.

             The story we WANT to write matters. It matters to us and it matters to God, and frankly, I think it matters to the whole world because we all benefit when we each follow our bliss and the talents and gifts we were sent to create with. Don’t rip yourself off, don’t rip the world off. Live your unique life story.

             So, back to the question – what does it mean to live intentionally. I think it means to live on purpose. Not to be acted upon, but to be the instigator of the story only you can write.

             Here’s a couple questions I’d like you to think about: Hit pause after each question and think about it.

             1. Is your life run by a bunch of “must do’s” that others create for you, or are you creating your storyline?
             2. If you feel like you’re at the mercy of other people’s expectations, what would you do differently if you could just start writing something new?
             3. If you are simply not taking action – if you’re in the “nothing is happening in my story because I’m lazy, or paralyzed by fear, or just too comfortable” is that the legacy you want to leave behind?
             4. What is something that is really important to you – something you want enough to overcome the obstacles that stand in your way: a fantastic relationship? A bike ride across the country? To buy that rental property and become a landlord?
             5. The fastest way to change up a story is to add a character or to incite an action that you can’t turn back from. Does your story need a little excitement?
             
             

             Well….the good news is that you are in charge of your choices every day. With every choice to act or not act you write the next paragraph in your life story. So you are totally the one with all the power.

             Ralph Marston said, “From this moment on, you don’t have to let anyone else’s opinion have any influence on the way you live your life. From this moment on, you can make every choice based on your highest, most treasured values. From this moment on, you can let go of all worries about what you might or might not happen. From this moment on, you can drop all your resentment and anguish about what’s already in the past. From this moment on, your life can be as good as you choose to make it. From this moment on, you can persistently stick with your commitment to living the best life you can imagine. Today your wisdom is greater than it’s ever been. Today, you have more experience than at any other point in your life so far. So today, and from now on, you’re able to make the most of all that. From this moment on, you can expect the best, and live up to those expectations. From this moment on, the possibilities are beautiful and amazing. Let this be the day you choose to live at a higher level than ever before.”

              

             Let me tell you part of my personal story –My Love Your Story research started because I did NOT love my story. I had been married and divorced three times. I felt shame and disbelief about my story. And I had also acquired a lot of pain, distrust of men, cynicism. I didn’t wallow in the victim spaces, but I was emotionally roughed up and I could NOT see my way around it after tears. One day one of my friends from work walked into my office and said I just returned from this emotional intelligence training. You need to go.

             I trusted her and so I went. I went because I knew I was stuck and I knew that despite all I had tried I couldn’t get myself unstuck. I had no idea what lay ahead. I had no idea that I would spend the better part of the next year flying back and forth between Utah and Ohio attending one level after another and working my way through coaches and programs and eventually becoming a coach myself in the program.

             One day while I was going through one of my coaching sessions, my coach handed us an assignment with the confidence of someone who couldn’t be challenged, but beneath her challenge excitement bubbled. She knew she was sending us out to gain an insight, but she also knew that we would all push back and opt for a trek to Starbucks if given even the slightest option between setting up a free-hugs stand and retreating to a safe and comfortable place. We weren’t given the slightest option.

             The assignment was to take 30 minutes and create a sign announcing free hugs – translation: head to the dollar store for poster board and markers, then we’d have another fifteen minutes to set up shop and choose our spot, after which we’d have an hour to offer hugs to the general passers-by.  My teammates and I looked at each other with trepidation, but we knew there was no way out, so we pulled up our big-people panties and went to work. At least if this flopped we’d flop together and have a story to tell. This uncomfortable assignment joined the ranks of many uncomfortable, but ultimately life-changing projects that my life coaches insisted upon during my emotional intelligence training.

             When I became a coach and started helping others who were as fresh and uncomfortable as I had once been I got to see and experience the transformation from the other side of the experience, and regardless of the side you were on, the experiences were powerful. They created discomfort, connection, communication, love, and possibility. One thing was certain. I wouldn’t have done these things on my own. I wouldn’t have even thought of many of them and I would have figured myself too busy to bother with others. But, if you’re not getting what you want from your life – if your story needs some tweaking, then you have to do things differently.

             The third tier of the Love Your Story platform is one of taking action to create your life on purpose. Last year I created something many of you have heard about – the 21-Day Challenge for creating connection/possibility/self-care in our lives.

             The precursor to this book started as the 21-Day Challenge. It was designed to provide a buffet of life hacks that the Love Your Story podcast audience and followers would try out during a three week period after which they could choose the life-hacks that individually meant the most to them and helped them create more connection, self-care, and possibility in their lives. It was an on-line course.

             We created on-line groups that embarked on the challenge together and then supported one another on the Love Your Story podcast Facebook page.  As the groups worked and I talked with participants, I found that some things needed improvement. Some people didn’t like

             *accessing their challenges on-line each morning.

             *Some wanted to keep their notes

             *Some felt guilt for getting behind and not doing a new challenge each day, which created a sense of failure rather than the intended improvements in their life stories.

             *Some wanted to give it as a gift – but I wasn’t sure how to do that online.

             So…I held a focus group. I got feedback from the participants and ideas for some powerful changes were made. Namely – it shouldn’t be a 21-day challenge, it would be more beneficial to have the 21 challenges available for people to do at their own pace. So the name changed. No longer was it the 21-Day Challenge, but it became the 21 L.I.F.E. Connection Challenges that it is today.

             The next upgrade was to put it in a book form. Creating a book solved multiple problems, namely people could keep a record of their notes at the end of each challenge, they could return to each challenge at will, and they could do the challenges at their own pace.

             So today, you are seeing the tried and tested product for creating better connection, possibility, and self-care in your own life, in your own powerful way, and in a way that is challenging, fun and interesting all at the same time.

              

             This is my tool – for this third and extremely important tier of creating our lives on purpose. We all know the things we should be doing. It’s not that the ideas are unheard of. You probably already do some of them. But the book is a fun and organized way that involves exercises that I have watched work with hundreds of people. It’s a taster’s table of life-hacks and sometimes it’s just really nice to have a format to follow – something to prompt that action you want to take to create better things in your life. A platform to follow and inspire you.

             For your copy and start to creating more connection, more possibility and more self-care in your story, you can get a copy of the book on the website – www.loveyourstorypodcast.com. These give you 21 challenges to take action on and you’ll be surprised how sometimes it is the small and simple things that start a whole new storyline. If you want to start living more intentionally, this book is a great place to start.

              

              

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4142Wed, 10 Apr 2019 09:00:51 -070030:09falsefullEpisode 134 Living Intentional and Fearless Every day   Eleanor Roosevelt said, “in the long run, we shape our lives, and we shape ourselves. The process never ends until we die. And the choices we make are ultimately our own responsibility.” In other words: Happiness is an inside job and we are VERY POWERFUL beings.…Lori LeeEpisode 133 Interview Emily and Erik Orton – Seven at Sea: What Could Go Right?Episode 133 Interview Emily and Erik Orton – Seven at Sea: What Could Go Right?

             Wanderlust. Boredom. Frustration. Whatever the reason, we have all had days where we wished we could just pack our bags and take off. But for a myriad of reason – spouse, kids, jobs, responsibility – we do not.

             Last year we followed the Kjars, a family who sold their home and loaded their kids in a motor home and headed out to visit 50 states in 52 weeks. They left their daily lives – the grind and created an unusual storyline. Today I am speaking with another family, this one from New York City, who took their 5 children, cast off convention, and loaded up a sailboat for a year at sea with just their family. Erik and Emily Orton recently published their book – Seven at Sea.

             The book takes us along for the ride of challenges, joys and concrete issues like finances, schooling, learning how to sail….but most important, and the thing I like best is that it reminds us that our lives are what we make them. We write our story plot lines and we have far more freedom in our creative writing than most of us allow ourselves. Today I want to talk to the Orton’s about their adventures, but also about how one finds the guts to think outside the box and write crazy plot lines with oodles of meaning and excitement.

             Erik Orton worked a temp job night shift in a cubicle in Manhattan to help provide for his wife and their five children, the youngest with Down Syndrome. Erik watched the sailboats on the Hudson River during his breaks and dared to dream that life could be more than just surviving. Despite having no sailing experience, his wife Emily’s phobia of deep water and already being financially stretched, the family of seven turned their excuses into reasons and their fears into motivation as they set off on a voyage that ultimately took them 5000 miles from New York to the Caribbean and back.

             Tune into the podcast for my amazing interview with this brave and dynamic couple.

             To follow Eric and Emily or to buy Seven at Sea:

             www.sevenatsea.com

              

             I feel like the meaning of today’s podcast is about customizing our own lives. Your challenge for this week is to consider what excuses you’ve let get in your way of writing some really great scenes into your life story. What are those excuses and what creative way could you get around them if you REALLY wanted to? Consider it…..

             Thanks for joining us today on the Love Your Story podcast. Share this episode, or another favorite episode with a friend – share the love people. Share the love and live big, bold and on purpose. You got this!

             Don’t forget loveyourstorypodcast.com for t-shirts, the 21-Life Connection Challenges book, to sign up for coaching and all the past episodes of the podcast.

             Have a great week.

             ]]>Episode 133 Interview Emily and Erik Orton – Seven at Sea: What Could Go Right?

             Wanderlust. Boredom. Frustration. Whatever the reason, we have all had days where we wished we could just pack our bags and take off. But for a myriad of reason – spouse, kids, jobs, responsibility – we do not.

             Last year we followed the Kjars, a family who sold their home and loaded their kids in a motor home and headed out to visit 50 states in 52 weeks. They left their daily lives – the grind and created an unusual storyline. Today I am speaking with another family, this one from New York City, who took their 5 children, cast off convention, and loaded up a sailboat for a year at sea with just their family. Erik and Emily Orton recently published their book – Seven at Sea.

             The book takes us along for the ride of challenges, joys and concrete issues like finances, schooling, learning how to sail….but most important, and the thing I like best is that it reminds us that our lives are what we make them. We write our story plot lines and we have far more freedom in our creative writing than most of us allow ourselves. Today I want to talk to the Orton’s about their adventures, but also about how one finds the guts to think outside the box and write crazy plot lines with oodles of meaning and excitement.

             Erik Orton worked a temp job night shift in a cubicle in Manhattan to help provide for his wife and their five children, the youngest with Down Syndrome. Erik watched the sailboats on the Hudson River during his breaks and dared to dream that life could be more than just surviving. Despite having no sailing experience, his wife Emily’s phobia of deep water and already being financially stretched, the family of seven turned their excuses into reasons and their fears into motivation as they set off on a voyage that ultimately took them 5000 miles from New York to the Caribbean and back.

             Tune into the podcast for my amazing interview with this brave and dynamic couple.

             To follow Eric and Emily or to buy Seven at Sea:

             www.sevenatsea.com

              

             I feel like the meaning of today’s podcast is about customizing our own lives. Your challenge for this week is to consider what excuses you’ve let get in your way of writing some really great scenes into your life story. What are those excuses and what creative way could you get around them if you REALLY wanted to? Consider it…..

             Thanks for joining us today on the Love Your Story podcast. Share this episode, or another favorite episode with a friend – share the love people. Share the love and live big, bold and on purpose. You got this!

             Don’t forget loveyourstorypodcast.com for t-shirts, the 21-Life Connection Challenges book, to sign up for coaching and all the past episodes of the podcast.

             Have a great week.

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4133Wed, 03 Apr 2019 09:00:33 -070042:04falsefullErik Orton worked a temp job night shift in a cubicle in Manhattan to help provide for his wife and their five children, the youngest with Down Syndrome. Erik watched the sailboats on the Hudson River during his breaks and dared to dream that life could be more than just surviving. Despite having no sailing experience, his wife Emily’s phobia of deep water and already being financially stretched, the family of seven turned their excuses into reasons and their fears into motivation as they set off on a voyage that ultimately took them 5000 miles from New York to the Caribbean and back. Tune in for one of my favorite interviews.Lori LeeEpisode 132 Interview Rebecca Cookston – DeviateEpisode 132 Interview Rebecca Cookston – Deviate

             What does it mean to deviate?

             When I think of the word deviate I think of getting off course. Does deviate have a negative connotation to you? In the book Deviate, the Science of Seeing Differently, by Beau Lotto, he discusses the idea of looking at things differently in order to get different results. The word deviate is more about choosing what not to look at, in order to create a new experience.

             Today I am introducing you to a guest who is dear to my heart. Rebecca Cookston is a personal friend of mine whom I met while walking along my street one day. She had moved in four or five doors down with her new husband – husband number four, in a small cottage where she would create a worm farm and home school her children. She’s a salt-of-the-earth wisdom worker and I’ve spent many an hour discussing ideas with her over the years. Her experience with her now, 5 husbands, was always interesting to me for a number of reasons, first, I loved that someone I respected had even more marriages under their belt than I did – and she was younger than me, and I also admired the way she took it in stride. She didn’t ever seem to be embarrassed, she lived and learned and accepted the experiences as part of her journey. After a few years, I was helping her pack up a trailer so she could safely return back home to her parents as she exited marriage number four. Just like her previous relationships, this one too was fraught with emotional and verbal abuse and physical intimidation. I took a couple of her house plants to “babysit” until she had her own space again, and she moved on to create something totally different. She is now a  4-time divorcee, a woman of the earth who had at several points, had to learn how to survive on food stamps and do the single mother hustle. Through her life experiences, Rebecca has learned to shift her focus to not look at certain things and this allows her to create a whole new range of possibilities which didn’t exist before. By doing this her life has greatly deviated onto a new and wonderful path.

             Tune into the podcast for the actual interview with Rebecca Cookston.

             Rebecca does not hang out in the social media space, so no links for her here.

             Since my conversation with Rebecca, the idea of deviating has been on my mind in a more proactive way. When something comes up in my life and I start thinking – geez, it should look like this – I’m stopping, and I find myself saying, “why does it have to look like that? What if instead, it looked like this?”

             For example,  as I have studied under the big podcast and online coaching players in the industry my idea of success has been formed by their results – big money, big following, big impact.

             What is MY idea of success though? As I’ve pondered and sought inspiration around this I have had a number of things come clear – first, success is in the individual impactful and influence on THE ONE. When we focus on the real help we can give just ONE person, then we have real influence. It’s not a puppy mill, it’s not a fast-tracking of clients to get numbers, it’s about real lives one at a time. By redefining what success is to me and choosing where I look and where I don’t look – I’m looking at the one and taking it one at a time with my clients instead of looking at comparison stats.  My actions and peace deviate by allowing for a different definition of success. I’ve also had the clarity that I can not know the ripples and impact of my work because it reaches well beyond monitoring. This helps me deviate my definition of success also.

             This life-hack tool of writing our own stories creates a real sense of creativity and freedom. Freedom from the “norm,” and the “expected,”  with a move toward possibility and creative license within your own life. If we can think outside the box and create a new way of arranging perceptions in our lives so that we find...]]>Episode 132 Interview Rebecca Cookston – Deviate

             What does it mean to deviate?

             When I think of the word deviate I think of getting off course. Does deviate have a negative connotation to you? In the book Deviate, the Science of Seeing Differently, by Beau Lotto, he discusses the idea of looking at things differently in order to get different results. The word deviate is more about choosing what not to look at, in order to create a new experience.

             Today I am introducing you to a guest who is dear to my heart. Rebecca Cookston is a personal friend of mine whom I met while walking along my street one day. She had moved in four or five doors down with her new husband – husband number four, in a small cottage where she would create a worm farm and home school her children. She’s a salt-of-the-earth wisdom worker and I’ve spent many an hour discussing ideas with her over the years. Her experience with her now, 5 husbands, was always interesting to me for a number of reasons, first, I loved that someone I respected had even more marriages under their belt than I did – and she was younger than me, and I also admired the way she took it in stride. She didn’t ever seem to be embarrassed, she lived and learned and accepted the experiences as part of her journey. After a few years, I was helping her pack up a trailer so she could safely return back home to her parents as she exited marriage number four. Just like her previous relationships, this one too was fraught with emotional and verbal abuse and physical intimidation. I took a couple of her house plants to “babysit” until she had her own space again, and she moved on to create something totally different. She is now a  4-time divorcee, a woman of the earth who had at several points, had to learn how to survive on food stamps and do the single mother hustle. Through her life experiences, Rebecca has learned to shift her focus to not look at certain things and this allows her to create a whole new range of possibilities which didn’t exist before. By doing this her life has greatly deviated onto a new and wonderful path.

             Tune into the podcast for the actual interview with Rebecca Cookston.

             Rebecca does not hang out in the social media space, so no links for her here.

             Since my conversation with Rebecca, the idea of deviating has been on my mind in a more proactive way. When something comes up in my life and I start thinking – geez, it should look like this – I’m stopping, and I find myself saying, “why does it have to look like that? What if instead, it looked like this?”

             For example,  as I have studied under the big podcast and online coaching players in the industry my idea of success has been formed by their results – big money, big following, big impact.

             What is MY idea of success though? As I’ve pondered and sought inspiration around this I have had a number of things come clear – first, success is in the individual impactful and influence on THE ONE. When we focus on the real help we can give just ONE person, then we have real influence. It’s not a puppy mill, it’s not a fast-tracking of clients to get numbers, it’s about real lives one at a time. By redefining what success is to me and choosing where I look and where I don’t look – I’m looking at the one and taking it one at a time with my clients instead of looking at comparison stats.  My actions and peace deviate by allowing for a different definition of success. I’ve also had the clarity that I can not know the ripples and impact of my work because it reaches well beyond monitoring. This helps me deviate my definition of success also.

             This life-hack tool of writing our own stories creates a real sense of creativity and freedom. Freedom from the “norm,” and the “expected,”  with a move toward possibility and creative license within your own life. If we can think outside the box and create a new way of arranging perceptions in our lives so that we find more joy, peace and fulfillment, well, I think it’s time we consider a little deviation.

             Thanks for tuning in to another Love Your Story discussion on life tools for building your best life story moving forward. If you would be interested in sponsoring the Love Your Story podcast we are looking for sponsors to help keep these great episodes, stories and story tool discussions coming out every Wednesday.

             Also – use the website www.loveyourstorypodcast.com to buy your t-shirts, enroll in classes to help you love your story, and to listen to all the back episodes. See you next week.

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4136Wed, 27 Mar 2019 09:00:33 -070027:47falsefullWhat does it mean to deviate? In the book Deviate, the Science of Seeing Differently, by Beau Lotto, he discusses the idea of looking at things differently in order to get different results. The word deviate is more about choosing what not to look at, in order to create a new experience.  Today I am talking with Rebecca Cookston is a personal friend of mine. Divorced four times and realizing that she needed to made some mind shifts she started learning to deviate. Tune in today for what that looks like and how it changed her outcomes.Lori LeeEpisode 131 Interview Katie Lee- It’s Inspirational Music TimeEpisode 131 Interview Katie Lee- It’s Inspirational Music Time

             I’ve been looking for some really good music for the podcast. Well, I found a singer/songwriter that I’m going to share with you today. Get ready for some inspirational music – full songs!

             Katie Lee is a Special Ed. Preschool Teacher and Singer/Songwriter. She is originally from Arizona but has been in Utah for 10 years. She enjoys performing in whatever capacity she can. She often plays local acoustic shows, weddings, retreats and just held her first religious musical fireside, but I think she ought to be much bigger. This girl is TALENTED.  She is a lover of people and bringing light and joy into others lives, so she’s sharing her music with you today. She loves a good adventure and can make simple things fun.

             Today she is going to share three of her original pieces of music with us. It’s a special inspirational musical treat today!

             Tune in for my discussion with Katie Lee and for her wonderful music.

             Songs:

             “Here” – played in the into at [2:00] minutes

             “God is Aware” – played at [9:00]

             “Trust Grace” – played at [19:00]

             God is Aware struck a note with me because so many of the stories we share on this podcast are about the spaces when we are fighting the dragons in our stories and we want to feel God has our back. We don’t want to feel alone. We want miracles. God is aware of every prayer and every bended knee – when you can’t see, don’t give into doubt.

             Trust Grace is a song that helps us look into Katie’s own story of overcoming her trials with trichotillomania.

             To find her music or to follow her go to:

             Free download @noisetrade.com/katielee  (Noise Trade)

             Instagram: @ktleeitsme

             Facebook: Katie Lee Music

             YouTube: www.youtube.com/katieleemusic

              

              

             ]]>Episode 131 Interview Katie Lee- It’s Inspirational Music Time

             I’ve been looking for some really good music for the podcast. Well, I found a singer/songwriter that I’m going to share with you today. Get ready for some inspirational music – full songs!

             Katie Lee is a Special Ed. Preschool Teacher and Singer/Songwriter. She is originally from Arizona but has been in Utah for 10 years. She enjoys performing in whatever capacity she can. She often plays local acoustic shows, weddings, retreats and just held her first religious musical fireside, but I think she ought to be much bigger. This girl is TALENTED.  She is a lover of people and bringing light and joy into others lives, so she’s sharing her music with you today. She loves a good adventure and can make simple things fun.

             Today she is going to share three of her original pieces of music with us. It’s a special inspirational musical treat today!

             Tune in for my discussion with Katie Lee and for her wonderful music.

             Songs:

             “Here” – played in the into at [2:00] minutes

             “God is Aware” – played at [9:00]

             “Trust Grace” – played at [19:00]

             God is Aware struck a note with me because so many of the stories we share on this podcast are about the spaces when we are fighting the dragons in our stories and we want to feel God has our back. We don’t want to feel alone. We want miracles. God is aware of every prayer and every bended knee – when you can’t see, don’t give into doubt.

             Trust Grace is a song that helps us look into Katie’s own story of overcoming her trials with trichotillomania.

             To find her music or to follow her go to:

             Free download @noisetrade.com/katielee  (Noise Trade)

             Instagram: @ktleeitsme

             Facebook: Katie Lee Music

             YouTube: www.youtube.com/katieleemusic

              

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4121Wed, 20 Mar 2019 09:00:43 -070029:04falsefullToday's episode is an inspirational music treat. Tune in for 3 original songs from the singer/songwriter Katie Lee and let her music buoy your day. You might even want to get the free download and become her regular fan. We'll talk about her process of navigating her own trials and developing her love of music and skill as a songwriter/singer/producer. Don't miss these songs. She's amazing.Lori LeeEpisode 130 Believe. Believe. Believe: A Few Words on Living with FaithBelieve. Believe. Believe. – A few words on living with Faith

              

             Do we ever know our way forward, completely? I seldom do. I’m always walking one step further into the darkness hoping it’s the right direction. When we are trying new things and taking risks – living into possibility, this is the landscape.

             Martha Beck said, “Every leap into light starts as a leap in the dark.” That has been my experience. Stay tuned for a few words on living with faith – in yourself, in the force that guides you, in your possibility and mission. It changes the story completely.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it

             Remember Hansel and Gretel? They didn’t know where they were headed, but they knew if they left a trail of bread crumbs they could solve their own problem. Yes, I realize that’s an interesting example since the birds end up eating their best-laid plans, but in the end, isn’t that usually how it goes? Life makes you move forward instead of letting you follow the trail back. And quite often it is in an unexpected way– walking into a dark forest, throwing out our best solutions as we move forward, like bread crumbs, and then things shift, the story gets more intense and doesn’t look like we expected. Here’s to the faith that in the end we’ll all push our personal witches into the oven and return home a hero, but let me point out a couple things – Hansel and Gretel had to walk into the woods to have their experience, even though it was traumatic, and of course they first had their desperate search for the trail that had vanished – we can relate to that when things change in our lives. In the end, they had to grasp hands and adapt or die, to put it bluntly. They had to move forward or stay stuck. They had to believe enough to drop the bread crumbs and move into the dark.

             Let’s kick off this fun discussion with the most basic understanding that fear and faith are opposites.

             If you believe the universe or God has your back and if you believe in yourself, the fear decreases. The more faith you have, the less fear dominates your thoughts and actions. This is important to understand because when you notice a high fear factor regarding something you’re trying to do you can stop for a moment and take stock of your faith around the given situation. You can decide where you stand and what needs to be adjusted.

             I’ve noticed something about myself lately. I’ve noticed that whenever I take on something that I have not done before, that I constantly shove that thing to the bottom of my list of things to do. I’ll share some specific examples. Recently my podcast editor took a full-time position elsewhere which required me to find a new podcast editor. One of the things my old podcast editor did for me was to design the cover photos for each episode. Well, that’s not usually something podcast editors do apparently, and my new editor did not include that in his services, so I needed to figure out how to use photoshop so I could design my own cover photos. Something new I don’t know how to do. Because I wasn’t sure which was the best program (could I use a cheaper program) and then I didn’t know how to use the program, I kept pushing it down the list of things to do because it was a step into the dark that I didn’t know how to take. I see this pattern repeated often for me.

             Example #2 – While I have 3 published books, all 3 have been published by publishers. They ask me to write the book. I write the book. Their editors edit, they design the layout, they...]]>Believe. Believe. Believe. – A few words on living with Faith

              

             Do we ever know our way forward, completely? I seldom do. I’m always walking one step further into the darkness hoping it’s the right direction. When we are trying new things and taking risks – living into possibility, this is the landscape.

             Martha Beck said, “Every leap into light starts as a leap in the dark.” That has been my experience. Stay tuned for a few words on living with faith – in yourself, in the force that guides you, in your possibility and mission. It changes the story completely.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it

             Remember Hansel and Gretel? They didn’t know where they were headed, but they knew if they left a trail of bread crumbs they could solve their own problem. Yes, I realize that’s an interesting example since the birds end up eating their best-laid plans, but in the end, isn’t that usually how it goes? Life makes you move forward instead of letting you follow the trail back. And quite often it is in an unexpected way– walking into a dark forest, throwing out our best solutions as we move forward, like bread crumbs, and then things shift, the story gets more intense and doesn’t look like we expected. Here’s to the faith that in the end we’ll all push our personal witches into the oven and return home a hero, but let me point out a couple things – Hansel and Gretel had to walk into the woods to have their experience, even though it was traumatic, and of course they first had their desperate search for the trail that had vanished – we can relate to that when things change in our lives. In the end, they had to grasp hands and adapt or die, to put it bluntly. They had to move forward or stay stuck. They had to believe enough to drop the bread crumbs and move into the dark.

             Let’s kick off this fun discussion with the most basic understanding that fear and faith are opposites.

             If you believe the universe or God has your back and if you believe in yourself, the fear decreases. The more faith you have, the less fear dominates your thoughts and actions. This is important to understand because when you notice a high fear factor regarding something you’re trying to do you can stop for a moment and take stock of your faith around the given situation. You can decide where you stand and what needs to be adjusted.

             I’ve noticed something about myself lately. I’ve noticed that whenever I take on something that I have not done before, that I constantly shove that thing to the bottom of my list of things to do. I’ll share some specific examples. Recently my podcast editor took a full-time position elsewhere which required me to find a new podcast editor. One of the things my old podcast editor did for me was to design the cover photos for each episode. Well, that’s not usually something podcast editors do apparently, and my new editor did not include that in his services, so I needed to figure out how to use photoshop so I could design my own cover photos. Something new I don’t know how to do. Because I wasn’t sure which was the best program (could I use a cheaper program) and then I didn’t know how to use the program, I kept pushing it down the list of things to do because it was a step into the dark that I didn’t know how to take. I see this pattern repeated often for me.

             Example #2 – While I have 3 published books, all 3 have been published by publishers. They ask me to write the book. I write the book. Their editors edit, they design the layout, they distribute, they sell. They send me royalty checks. Well, I am working this year to put out the 21 LIFE Connection Challenges in book form. I’m excited about what this will mean and the great access it will give everyone to the challenges and creating their best life stories, but I’ve never gone through the self-publishing process before. I’m not sure how to design the layout of a book. I’m not sure about distribution. Because of this my work on this project is constantly relegated to the end of my list. I’ve done nothing in over 6 weeks.

             So, I started noticing this pattern. When I don’t know my way forward I stall. Once I recognized the pattern I decided to change it. I could see my own fear and hesitation around stepping into the darkness, but I could also see that all that was required was to step into the darkness.

             I started taking active steps to find people who could shed a light on what I didn’t know. This mindset shift of recognition and then action is the way I’m going to create action and douse fear.

             Sometimes when we are facing a fear vs. faith situation it requires releasing old thought systems and surrender to new ways of being that are defined by an absolute belief in yourself and your ability to create, as well as in God, the universe, or the power that guides your life. Faith is a belief in things beyond what you can control, beyond what you can see or prove, beyond what you know – or in my case, beyond what I know how to do. But it’s that belief that is the precursor to creation and the shield against fear—the belief in what I’m creating. The belief in God’s support of my efforts. The belief in my ability to learn and do.

             There is always choice. Choice for fear or choice for faith.

             Let me share a story that impressed me about a man who chose faith year after year regarding who he was meant to be and what he was meant to do.

             James Owens is a graphic artist, a cartoonist, a novelist. In his book Drawing out the Dragons he shares specific stories about his personal life, the choices that one at a time contributed to his massive success in the realms in which he flourishes. At 16 he was the youngest professional publisher ever to be an exhibitor at the San Diego Comic-Con.  He was dedicated and persistent to his vision. Always believing despite the difficulty of succeeding at his chosen profession and art. The rest of his life, each decision to compromise or hold strong, was always based on the faith that he was meant to be a comic book artist. When he had no money to buy food and his home was being foreclosed on because his endeavors weren’t paying off, he still believed in himself, in his destiny, and at each turn he went to work, harder and harder until he had the meetings with the people he needed in order to accomplish what he wanted to accomplish. And did he do it, despite the dark days of unknowing?  He most certainly did. What struck me about his story was his seeming unwavering faith and dedication to his dream. Let me share a small part of his story:

             James had embarked on his dream of starting a comic book company. He was the creator and illustrator of his comics and so his hands were vital. Two issues into his series a woman takes a left turn in front of him and he is in an auto accident that smashes his right hand.  At the hospital, the doctors examined his hand and said there was too much damage to do surgery, which would just increase scar tissue, so the best they could do was to put the bones back in place and then engage in therapy for a year. They told him he would have 30-40% of the use of his hand if he worked hard.  He says, “For the second time that year I had a big decision to make. I had to decide how much I really wanted to do what I was doing because according to the doctors my career as an artist was all but over. For my part, I believed something different. I believed that if you really want to do something, no one can stop you, but if you really don’t want to do something, no one can help you. As he sat there with his hand in a brace from his fingertips to his elbow, he announced he was going to rehabilitate his hand, heal completely and then pick up where he’d left off with issue three of StarChild. He said everyone in the world decided I was wrong. The doctors, friends, family and a few curious patients all gathered around him and applauded his optimism and attitude, but they insisted he needed to be realistic. He proved them all wrong.

             His book is called: Drawing out the Dragons–A beginner’s guide to making choices that matter. I think choosing faith is a choice that matters because it’s the choice that determines whether you move forward and the kind of power you have behind you. I’m not just talking about faith in a career path here. His story is just an example of keeping a vision and determination with anything in your life. Maybe it’s choosing faith over fear as you battle with depression, an eating disorder or an addiction. Maybe it’s faith over fear that God has your back. Maybe it’s faith over fear that you can be a good parent. Maybe it’s faith over fear that you can support your family. It’s different for all of us.

             Theodore Roosevelt said, “Believe you can and you’re halfway there.”

             And, Martha Beck, the internationally renowned life coach, one of my favorites,  said, “Anyone who embraces the mender’s way of life must proceed through continual, infinite, breathtaking leaps of faith. Each time you face an unknown future with creativity rather than grasping at known quantities, you leap. Each time you dare to believe your art can sustain you financially, you leap. Each time you trust your tribe of menders, you leap. Each time you embrace a love that lays you bare in body, heart, or soul, you leap. And whenever you begin to disbelieve in yourself, your destiny, your ability to heal some part of the world, you must leap instead into the branches of magic.”

             In the book Rise of Superman by Steve Kotler, he tackles the relationship between imagination and physical possibility. He quotes psychologist Michael Gervais, “you have to understand that the brain tells stories. When most hear about an impossible feat – the sub-four-minute mile; the MegaRamp 1080 – our first reaction is: ‘Not real, no way, not possible.’ But we have a strong need to make meaning out of experience and this new reality forces us to change our story. We move to, ‘That’s crazy, far out, unreal.’ Pretty soon, we accept this new reality and shift our paradigm further and this engages the imagination. We start imagining the impossible as possible. What does impossible feel like, sound like, look like? And then we start to be able to see ourselves doing the impossible –that’s the secret. There is an extremely tight link between our visual system and our physiology: once we can actually see ourselves doing the impossible, our chances of pulling it off increase significantly.”

             Proven, over and over, that once a threshold is passed by someone, others, now realizing it’s possible, push past that threshold with increased speed and frequency, it’s impossible to deny the power of belief in the ability to accomplish a thing. Someone just has to believe enough to push past the limitation, and suddenly the rest of the world can follow.

             George Lucas said, “You simply have to put one foot in front of the other and keep going.” This ode to persistence is based on faith. We don’t keep walking into the dark forest unless we believe we have a shot at surviving. This is hope, this is faith, this is persistent action that creates results.

             Our lives are less about what is going on around us, and more about what is going on inside us. We create the meaning that events have to us. Do we create that meaning around faith or around fear? That’s an important question because the answer will determine very different outcomes.

             Fear isn’t going anywhere.  It’s maybe the most common negative human emotion we all share. But there is good news. Courage can become a habit. The way to combat fear is to make a mindset shift. This shift doesn’t mean that fear disappears, it means that your faith in yourself, your ability, your support, your god, outlives the fear that tries to shut you down. It means you believe, and so you do, and your hope and your faith becomes action and then things really start cookin’.

             For me, this shift happened when I was surrounded by coaches telling me not to rip the world off. I was surprised how much fear popped up every day when I started creating this podcast. There were fears I didn’t even know I had. It became a daily reckoning – each day I would end up finding a new fear and I’d have to push past it. We’ve talked about being in the arena and getting dirty – being the hero – this is the mental space where you are fighting your dragons. This is the space where you step onto the dark forest path overhung with vines and spooky noises, but you step onto the path anyway. This is the part of the story where you enter the lair of the antagonist to steal back the jewel of your own ability. This is the high stakes space of beating out the shadows of your own mind.

             Remember what Emerson said, “Do the thing you fear and the death of fear is certain.”

             I want to leave this topic with one final thought – what do you think about the idea of the faith we show in others gives them additional power and the faith that other’s show in us buoys and supports us in our forward movement. This seems perhaps obvious – we all like to be supported, but I wonder if there isn’t a real power behind this – faith is a power, but I think it’s also a power that can be shared. A combined faith may create an exponential power behind it. So maybe, just maybe, we can start thinking about lending our own faith and support to others as they embark on their challenges, large and small, and help push one another up the next mountain.

             Thanks for listening in today. I hope you’ve found even just one take-away that will propel you forward with faith along your own path – faith is the power to overcome fear. The power behind forward movement. Believe in you, in your story, in a Universe that has your back.

             Quick plug for the website – loveyourstorypodcast.com – it’s got all the 120+ episodes that you can listen to and share. It’s got on-line courses – the 21 LIFE Connection Challenges for creating possibility and connection in your life and the 5-Steps to reframing old stories that hold you back. You can also buy your Love Your Story t-shirts there.

             Thanks for being a part of the audience. Keep up the great work and this week your challenge is to push past just one fear. Just one fear!

             See you next week.

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4115Wed, 13 Mar 2019 09:00:50 -070024:19falsefullDo we ever know our way forward, completely? I seldom do. I’m always walking one step further into the darkness hoping it’s the right direction. When we are trying new things and taking risks – living into possibility, this is the landscape. What does it take to leap into the light....a leap into the dark.Lori LeeEpisode 129 Interview Emma Houston: Your Fierceness-Own it! Live it!Episode 129 Interview Emma Houston:

             Your Fierceness-Own it! Live it!

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today I’m talking with Emma Houston.

             I met her as I sat in the audience at a women’s empowerment weekend seminar. I loved her message, her spunk, her authentic energy and I wanted her to share with you the same things she shared with us in the audience that day.

             She is a thriver, a supporter, a victor, a mentor and a cheerleader for people going through life’s challenges. She’s a spunky little black woman, an active member of the Calvary Baptist Church, and the owner and CEO of Brighter Day Productions.

             Emma Houston Hails from Texas originally. In 2016 she was appointed as Diversity and Inclusion Director by mayor Ben McAdams for the Salt Lake County’s Office of Diversity Affairs, so she is obviously now in Utah.

             She is the former chairwoman of the Governor’s Office of Ethnic Affairs and former secretary for the YWCA Board and UAA Board. She is a cancer survivor and serves on the Huntsman Cancer Foundation Community Advisory Committee. She is also the chair for the Martin Luther King Commission.  She is passionate about sharing her skills and connections and working with communities. She has survived the storms of life with style and grace and seeks to cheer on those in the battle.

             Tune into the audio program for my interview with Emma.

             For more information on Emma:

              www.facebook.com/emma.e.houston  

             http://www.linkedin.com/pub/emma-e-houston/16/55b/723 

              

             I’ve been wondering, what you, the listeners, think about the line-up of interviews I’ve been hosting. Sometimes it feels like I interview  people who have had a lot of struggle, and while the interviews are all about illustrating through our stories how to get past our struggles, I don’t want there to be a feeling of “Oh My Gosh, what depressing story are we going to get today?” I want to tell stories that create hope and faith. I think I do.

             The people on the podcast are the ones thriving despite their challenges. They are icons of getting in the arena and standing back up.  My interview with Emma was all about her great attitude, spirit, and sense of humor – all important in living out those life stories – tough and otherwise. But,  I’d love your feedback. I’d love to know which episodes you’re really connecting with and which ones you like or don’t like. You can reach me at lorijlee@msn.com, or leave comments below each episode on the website www.loveyourstorypodcast.com, or hop on our FB page – Love Your Story podcast. Love to get your feedback. Thanks for tuning in. I couldn’t do this without the audience and I hope with all my heart that you are finding value. I know I am. These people are amazing!

             ]]>Episode 129 Interview Emma Houston:

             Your Fierceness-Own it! Live it!

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today I’m talking with Emma Houston.

             I met her as I sat in the audience at a women’s empowerment weekend seminar. I loved her message, her spunk, her authentic energy and I wanted her to share with you the same things she shared with us in the audience that day.

             She is a thriver, a supporter, a victor, a mentor and a cheerleader for people going through life’s challenges. She’s a spunky little black woman, an active member of the Calvary Baptist Church, and the owner and CEO of Brighter Day Productions.

             Emma Houston Hails from Texas originally. In 2016 she was appointed as Diversity and Inclusion Director by mayor Ben McAdams for the Salt Lake County’s Office of Diversity Affairs, so she is obviously now in Utah.

             She is the former chairwoman of the Governor’s Office of Ethnic Affairs and former secretary for the YWCA Board and UAA Board. She is a cancer survivor and serves on the Huntsman Cancer Foundation Community Advisory Committee. She is also the chair for the Martin Luther King Commission.  She is passionate about sharing her skills and connections and working with communities. She has survived the storms of life with style and grace and seeks to cheer on those in the battle.

             Tune into the audio program for my interview with Emma.

             For more information on Emma:

              www.facebook.com/emma.e.houston  

             http://www.linkedin.com/pub/emma-e-houston/16/55b/723 

              

             I’ve been wondering, what you, the listeners, think about the line-up of interviews I’ve been hosting. Sometimes it feels like I interview  people who have had a lot of struggle, and while the interviews are all about illustrating through our stories how to get past our struggles, I don’t want there to be a feeling of “Oh My Gosh, what depressing story are we going to get today?” I want to tell stories that create hope and faith. I think I do.

             The people on the podcast are the ones thriving despite their challenges. They are icons of getting in the arena and standing back up.  My interview with Emma was all about her great attitude, spirit, and sense of humor – all important in living out those life stories – tough and otherwise. But,  I’d love your feedback. I’d love to know which episodes you’re really connecting with and which ones you like or don’t like. You can reach me at lorijlee@msn.com, or leave comments below each episode on the website www.loveyourstorypodcast.com, or hop on our FB page – Love Your Story podcast. Love to get your feedback. Thanks for tuning in. I couldn’t do this without the audience and I hope with all my heart that you are finding value. I know I am. These people are amazing!

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4112Wed, 06 Mar 2019 09:00:07 -070033:25falsefullWhat does it mean to accept your own fierce beauty? What does it look like to face cancer with faith in your journey? Emma Houston was appointed in 2016 as Diversity and Inclusion Director by mayor Ben McAdams for the Salt Lake County’s Office of Diversity Affairs. She is the former chairwoman of the Governor’s Office of Ethnic Affairs and former secretary for the YWCA Board and UAA Board. She is a cancer survivor and serves on the Huntsman Cancer Foundation Community Advisory Committee. She is also the chair for the Martin Luther King Commission. She's here today because she is also a cheerleader--a cheerleader reminding us of our own fierce beauty, power, and control over our growth and attitudes, no matter what life throws our way. Tune in for some cheering!Lori LeeEpisode 128: Let’s Talk about Stress BabyEpisode 128: Let’s Talk about Stress Baby

             Hans Selye said, “It is not stress that kills us, it is our reaction to it.” You, yes you, the one listening to the podcast – do you have stress in your life? Do you think of that stress as being good or bad?

             In today’s episode we’re going to talk about the S word! Yup – Stress. Who can’t use a few empowering tips and stories about this constant state of the 21^st century? Stay tuned for insights from a lot of great minds on this topic.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

             What if stress isn’t what you’ve always thought it was? I’m going to start today’s discussion with some scientific research and then we’re going to hear from folks like the Dalai Lama and Marcus Aurelius, and when we’re done, you just might see things a little differently.

             So, starting with a TED talk by Kelly McGonigal, a health psychologist, where she makes her confession – that the idea she’s been teaching about stress and seeing it as the enemy has been all wrong.  Listen to this research study she did and then let’s talk about this new way of seeing things:

             https://www.ted.com/talks/kelly_mcgonigal_how_to_make_stress_your_friend#t-43174  ([1:16] – [6:30])

             So…if we view our body’s response to stress and fabulous programming that’s helping you rise to the challenge, how does it change your aversion to stress?

             Dalai Lama said, “We can never obtain peace in the outer world until we obtain peace within ourselves.”

             What if part of that peace is a shift of a story. The shift of the story that stress is bad, that life is overwhelming, that I can’t possibly handle this intensity of living, to the story that your body’s response to stress is healthy, helpful, and manageable? Well first off, if you change the story and you tell yourself this new truth, your body believes you and your responses internally change. That inner peace with a clearer understanding becomes a stepping stone for a more peaceful outer world. We can create a new understanding and story about the physical effects of stress.

             Now, another great thinker, Marcus Aurelius shares wisdom about the psychological power we have regarding what we allow to cause us stress. He  said, “If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your own estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.”

             Let me repeat that: “If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your own estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.”

             Gosh that does two things – First, it means you and I have to take responsibility for our mental state, but second, that means we suddenly have control. Yay!

             Let me state the obvious in a few examples – if you have a set of internal stories about how thin and lifeless your hair is, well, regardless of if that’s true, that in and of itself does not cause pain, it’s the fact that you find it unacceptable that causes you the pain. If you have a belief that reading a book is painful – it’s not that reading a book is actually painful, it’s that you chose to see it as painful. If you have issues around money and your car breaks down and you have to pull out the credit card for a new fuel line – this experience is only painful if your mindset creates pain around it.

             I hear over and...]]>Episode 128: Let’s Talk about Stress Baby

             Hans Selye said, “It is not stress that kills us, it is our reaction to it.” You, yes you, the one listening to the podcast – do you have stress in your life? Do you think of that stress as being good or bad?

             In today’s episode we’re going to talk about the S word! Yup – Stress. Who can’t use a few empowering tips and stories about this constant state of the 21^st century? Stay tuned for insights from a lot of great minds on this topic.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

             What if stress isn’t what you’ve always thought it was? I’m going to start today’s discussion with some scientific research and then we’re going to hear from folks like the Dalai Lama and Marcus Aurelius, and when we’re done, you just might see things a little differently.

             So, starting with a TED talk by Kelly McGonigal, a health psychologist, where she makes her confession – that the idea she’s been teaching about stress and seeing it as the enemy has been all wrong.  Listen to this research study she did and then let’s talk about this new way of seeing things:

             https://www.ted.com/talks/kelly_mcgonigal_how_to_make_stress_your_friend#t-43174  ([1:16] – [6:30])

             So…if we view our body’s response to stress and fabulous programming that’s helping you rise to the challenge, how does it change your aversion to stress?

             Dalai Lama said, “We can never obtain peace in the outer world until we obtain peace within ourselves.”

             What if part of that peace is a shift of a story. The shift of the story that stress is bad, that life is overwhelming, that I can’t possibly handle this intensity of living, to the story that your body’s response to stress is healthy, helpful, and manageable? Well first off, if you change the story and you tell yourself this new truth, your body believes you and your responses internally change. That inner peace with a clearer understanding becomes a stepping stone for a more peaceful outer world. We can create a new understanding and story about the physical effects of stress.

             Now, another great thinker, Marcus Aurelius shares wisdom about the psychological power we have regarding what we allow to cause us stress. He  said, “If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your own estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.”

             Let me repeat that: “If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your own estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.”

             Gosh that does two things – First, it means you and I have to take responsibility for our mental state, but second, that means we suddenly have control. Yay!

             Let me state the obvious in a few examples – if you have a set of internal stories about how thin and lifeless your hair is, well, regardless of if that’s true, that in and of itself does not cause pain, it’s the fact that you find it unacceptable that causes you the pain. If you have a belief that reading a book is painful – it’s not that reading a book is actually painful, it’s that you chose to see it as painful. If you have issues around money and your car breaks down and you have to pull out the credit card for a new fuel line – this experience is only painful if your mindset creates pain around it.

             I hear over and over – “well, we can’t help what we feel,” and I understand that idea very well. When I deeply feel irritated or disappointed and it’s a natural response to something, I don’t want to take responsibility for that. Sometimes it feels very justified, but the truth is that for our own peace of mind there are things that we can start to shift to help us let go of our own estimates of pain. Last week I was irritated that a certain friend chose to spend time elsewhere, other than with me. So, I stopped and acknowledged the disappointment, but then moved on to the idea that I can build a story around this as a rejection, or I can create thoughts about how nice it was for this person to spend time with their family. Which one is going to support me best? Which one will support my relationship? Which one will create stress and unhappiness and which one will create peace? The truth bomb here is that we control our stress levels with our stories.

             So, we’re not just about talk – we’re about action. So here’s a little how-to on the Cognitive Restructuring front: a 3 step process

             1.Identify the thoughts that are causing you stress and anxiety, depression or self-doubt.

             If you have a belief that you are unlovable, or dirty or a bad mom, or that everyone else knows the key to happiness and you’re the only one missing the key. I’m not good enough. I’m not skinny enough.  My ADHD means I can’t do this.  – Identify the thought/s.

             2.  The exercise of noticing when you feel that way will become a habit. After you notice, follow the thought back to see where it stems from.

             For example, you notice that you are stressed that your sister and her husband are coming for dinner. You don’t want to feel stressed, you know it’s not that big of a deal, so you start following the thought bread crumbs back…I’m feeling stressed because I still have to pick up celery for the soup. I know I can do it on the way home from work, but there are 5 or 6 steps to get dinner ready and what if I don’t have time to set an Etsy appropriate table? Why do I care about this? I care because my sister is always sharp, on the ball, I’ve always felt like she was judging how frumpy my life looked in comparison. Why do I think she thinks this? I don’t know, but she must. Who wouldn’t? So, this stress is about the created worry that my sister will judge me? What if she does? What if I just made a good meal, broke bread with family in love and worried less about appearances? How would the love I bring change my feelings and any potential judgment?

             3. Once you find the original source of the stress and challenge that thought, you begin to release old stories and emotionally negative beliefs, and this can change your feelings. There is an intimate link between what we think and what we feel. Cognitive restructuring allows you to change the way you feel by changing what you think. It’s a process of replacing damaging thoughts and beliefs with more accurate and beneficial beliefs. You target the thoughts causing you the anxiety, depression and pressure and stress.

             So…let’s recap – #1 – the new research on stress is that it only causes physical harm when you believe that it causes physical harm. So you can change your physical response to stressful situations by claiming the new things we know about appreciating the bodies systems for helping you to prepare for your highest performance level.

             #2 Again, is in the mind – the only external things that cause you to stress are the ones that you internally have stories around the nature of the thing or event. So again, you can recognize and adjust your own irritation, stress, crazy levels by considering the internal stories you have around them.

             Albert Schweitzer said, “The greatest discovery of any generation is that human beings can alter their lives by altering the attitudes of their minds.”

             And, last but not least – your challenge this week is to use the cognitive restructuring steps on just one thought that’s causing you stress or discomfort this week. Just try it out.

             I love this final quote because it’s an ode to our beautiful complexity as human beings and our creative, messy space of figuring out how to live well and create our best life stories: It’s by Audre Lorde. She said,

             “I am my best work—a series of road maps, reports, recipes, doodles, and prayers from the front lines.”

             Have a great week people. Thanks for being here. Please access the loveyourstorypodcast.com website and take advantage of the online courses for reframing your stories that are holding you back, or getting started on the 21-LIFE Connection challenges for creating your best life purpose with these 21-Life Hacks.

             See you next week people! Live your best life story.

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4107Wed, 27 Feb 2019 09:00:36 -070014:49falsefullWhat if stress isn’t what you’ve always thought it was? I’m going to start today’s discussion with some scientific research and then we’re going to hear from folks like the Dalai Lama and Marcus Aurelius, and when we’re done, you just might see things a little differently. You'll definitely see how much YOU control your stress levels. Tune in!!Lori LeeEpisode 127 Interview Laurann Turner: Every Single DayEpisode 127 Interview Laurann Turner: Every Single Day

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast where we share stories so we can learn and growth with each other, and where we talk about story tools – life hacks—for living your best life story on purpose.

             Today I’m talking with Laurann Turner, author of Every Single Day.

             Laurann was raised on a small farm in Northern Utah.  She has an MBA and worked in the Healthcare Industry for 12 years in various positions including her latest job as Vice President of Operations. While working and building her exterior successes, she realized on the inside she wasn’t happy. – I think we’ve all been at a place where we can relate to that —  Having a desire to have inner peace & happiness she walked away from her esteemed career and six-figure income and then decided to start listening to her higher power and embark on a  16-month journey to reconnect with inner self and to become who she is truly meant to be.

             She sold her beloved house in order to disconnect with old ties and in her book Every Single Day she describes the steps, processes and experienced she used to find happiness Every Single Day. Many claim she is a beacon of joy & inspiration – I second that. Laurann is a courageous individual and an avid navigator of life’s trials.  She loves encouraging, mentoring and supporting those who want to work on becoming their best, most authentic selves.  She works as a professional Realtor, Master Cookie Decorator, Author, and Occasional Clothing Model, but today she’s going to share her story and shine a light on the path of transformation.

             Tune in to the audio program for my discussion with Laurann.

             Every Single Day we create the next page in our story. Every single day we choose how to live and what thoughts to let dominate our minds. Every Single Day we create or destroy, we hide or we throw the doors open and live boldly. Every Single Day we have choice. What does your day look and feel like? What changes might you need to make to enjoy the journey Every Single Day?

             Thanks for tuning in to today’s story. Don’t forget you can go to the website, www.loveyourstorypodcast.com to get access to all the past episodes, to buy t-shirts, to sign up for the 21 LIFE Connection Challenges or to start the 5 Steps to Reframing a Past Story course. I hope you’ll use the tools and share the podcast with people you think would find value in it. See you next week.

             For more information on Laurann Turner or to find her book:

             everysingledaycorporation.com

             Intagram: @laurannturner

             ]]>Episode 127 Interview Laurann Turner: Every Single Day

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast where we share stories so we can learn and growth with each other, and where we talk about story tools – life hacks—for living your best life story on purpose.

             Today I’m talking with Laurann Turner, author of Every Single Day.

             Laurann was raised on a small farm in Northern Utah.  She has an MBA and worked in the Healthcare Industry for 12 years in various positions including her latest job as Vice President of Operations. While working and building her exterior successes, she realized on the inside she wasn’t happy. – I think we’ve all been at a place where we can relate to that —  Having a desire to have inner peace & happiness she walked away from her esteemed career and six-figure income and then decided to start listening to her higher power and embark on a  16-month journey to reconnect with inner self and to become who she is truly meant to be.

             She sold her beloved house in order to disconnect with old ties and in her book Every Single Day she describes the steps, processes and experienced she used to find happiness Every Single Day. Many claim she is a beacon of joy & inspiration – I second that. Laurann is a courageous individual and an avid navigator of life’s trials.  She loves encouraging, mentoring and supporting those who want to work on becoming their best, most authentic selves.  She works as a professional Realtor, Master Cookie Decorator, Author, and Occasional Clothing Model, but today she’s going to share her story and shine a light on the path of transformation.

             Tune in to the audio program for my discussion with Laurann.

             Every Single Day we create the next page in our story. Every single day we choose how to live and what thoughts to let dominate our minds. Every Single Day we create or destroy, we hide or we throw the doors open and live boldly. Every Single Day we have choice. What does your day look and feel like? What changes might you need to make to enjoy the journey Every Single Day?

             Thanks for tuning in to today’s story. Don’t forget you can go to the website, www.loveyourstorypodcast.com to get access to all the past episodes, to buy t-shirts, to sign up for the 21 LIFE Connection Challenges or to start the 5 Steps to Reframing a Past Story course. I hope you’ll use the tools and share the podcast with people you think would find value in it. See you next week.

             For more information on Laurann Turner or to find her book:

             everysingledaycorporation.com

             Intagram: @laurannturner

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4103Wed, 20 Feb 2019 09:00:52 -070048:10falsefullLaurann Turner is the author of Every Single Day. Every Single Day we create the next page in our story. Every single day we choose how to live and what thoughts to let dominate our minds. Every Single Day we create or destroy, we hide or we throw the doors open and live boldly. Every Single Day we have choice. What does your day look and feel like? What changes might you need to make to enjoy the journey Every Single Day? Tune in for our discussion and a dose of inspiration.Lori LeeEpisode 126 The Dating Challenge: 35 Dates for Her 35th Birthday – Interview with Katie HoustonEpisode 126 The Dating Challenge: 35 Dates for Her 35th Birthday – Interview with Katie Houston

             Katie Houston is a thirty-something high school choir teacher who is passionate about education, writing, musicals, and human interaction.  She studied music education at BYU and the University of Utah and dreams of someday writing a book.  Her hobbies include singing with the Tabernacle Choir on Temple Square, crafting homemade cards, trying to look like she knows what she’s doing at Orange Theory Fitness, and watching crime TV.

             In todays interview we follow Katie’s challenge to date 35 men in 3 months. This is how it got started:

             She woke up early in the morning a couple days before her 35th birthday and spontaneously set a crazy goal: She was going on 35 dates in 3 months using social media to help connect her with new people. She launched her experiment by asking friends and family on Facebook and Instagram to set her up and she stayed active on dating apps. She also appeared on a Facebook live show called, “Friday Night Love” and discussed her experiment.

             Her goal was about the journey and not the end result. She didn’t expect to fall in love, but welcomed it if it happened. She kept a journal of each date on her blog, “A Teacher’s Diary.” She called it 35 Chances, because she viewed each date as a new chance to learn something about dating. She chose to focus her writing on positive lessons learned rather than a dating critique. She learned a lot about herself, both good and bad, and met some very cool people.

             Did she fall in love? You’ll have to listen to find out!

              

             Tune into the audio program as we follow her challenge.

             To follow Katie or to get in touch with her:
             Website: www.mshouston.blogspot.com
             Instagram: @ktkarrots

             ]]>Episode 126 The Dating Challenge: 35 Dates for Her 35th Birthday – Interview with Katie Houston

             Katie Houston is a thirty-something high school choir teacher who is passionate about education, writing, musicals, and human interaction.  She studied music education at BYU and the University of Utah and dreams of someday writing a book.  Her hobbies include singing with the Tabernacle Choir on Temple Square, crafting homemade cards, trying to look like she knows what she’s doing at Orange Theory Fitness, and watching crime TV.

             In todays interview we follow Katie’s challenge to date 35 men in 3 months. This is how it got started:

             She woke up early in the morning a couple days before her 35th birthday and spontaneously set a crazy goal: She was going on 35 dates in 3 months using social media to help connect her with new people. She launched her experiment by asking friends and family on Facebook and Instagram to set her up and she stayed active on dating apps. She also appeared on a Facebook live show called, “Friday Night Love” and discussed her experiment.

             Her goal was about the journey and not the end result. She didn’t expect to fall in love, but welcomed it if it happened. She kept a journal of each date on her blog, “A Teacher’s Diary.” She called it 35 Chances, because she viewed each date as a new chance to learn something about dating. She chose to focus her writing on positive lessons learned rather than a dating critique. She learned a lot about herself, both good and bad, and met some very cool people.

             Did she fall in love? You’ll have to listen to find out!

              

             Tune into the audio program as we follow her challenge.

             To follow Katie or to get in touch with her:
             Website: www.mshouston.blogspot.com
             Instagram: @ktkarrots

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4089Wed, 13 Feb 2019 09:00:25 -070059:25falsefullKatie Houston is a thirty-something high school choir teacher who woke up early in the morning a couple days before her 35th birthday and spontaneously set a crazy goal: She was going on 35 dates in 3 months using social media to help connect her with new people. She launched her experiment by asking friends and family on Facebook and Instagram to set her up and she stayed active on dating apps. She also appeared on a Facebook live show called, "Friday Night Love" and discussed her experiment. Tune in as we follow her LOVE challenge and let's see if she falls in love...Lori LeeEpisode 125 Interview David Hutchens: Using Story to Create ConnectionEpisode 125 Interview David Hutchens: Using Story to Create Connection

             Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast. A few years ago I was volunteering at the Parliament of Religions – a space where every religious affiliation you can think of, from across the world-monks, Wickens, Christians, tribal leaders, etc. came together for a conference of understanding one another better and working together.

             So… I’m walking through the meditation labyrinths, the info. tables, and the food booths and I find this unmanned table with a stack of books and the word MUSE on it. I stop. I’m always looking for my muse. On the table sat a sign that read “$20” and a stack of books sat next to it. I picked up the book and flipped through it. It was well illustrated – gotta love an easy read– and the concepts were exactly what I wanted to know more about as I personally studied story and worked with my clients on finding and crafting their stories. So I dropped $20 bucks, took a book and tucked it in my bag. I used the Circle of the 9 Muses for the development of my Story Launchpad workshop and got a much broader view of helping organizations extract their stories. So, I knew David and worked with his stuff way before I made contact with him as a person. Needless to say, I’m super stoked to hop on this conversation with him because business leaders out there – this is the real stuff.

             David is the author of Circle of the 9 Muses: A Storytelling Field Guide for Innovators and Meaning Makers,  and is creator of the Learning Fables — a book series that uses narrative and metaphor to illustrate principles of organizational learning.

             With titles that include “Outlearning the Wolves” and “Shadows of the Neanderthal,” the popular business fables have sold more than a quarter-million copies in over a dozen languages.section of narrative, leadership, and complex systems change for more than 20 years.

             Besides being a bestselling author, business writer and learning designer, he created solutions for The Coca-Cola Company, PayPal, Wal-Mart, Accenture, IBM, L’Oreal, The US Olympic Committee, and others. He travels the world and shares his knowledge of story and how to use it with big business. So stay tuned for the good stuff!

              

             To hear our conversation on using story to create connection in all parts of life – business, personal, and even in a college entrance interview, tune into the audio program.

             To follow or get in touch with David:

             Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DavidHutchens9Muse/
             Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidbhutchens/
             LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/davidhutchens/
             Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidbhutchens

              

             ]]>Episode 125 Interview David Hutchens: Using Story to Create Connection

             Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast. A few years ago I was volunteering at the Parliament of Religions – a space where every religious affiliation you can think of, from across the world-monks, Wickens, Christians, tribal leaders, etc. came together for a conference of understanding one another better and working together.

             So… I’m walking through the meditation labyrinths, the info. tables, and the food booths and I find this unmanned table with a stack of books and the word MUSE on it. I stop. I’m always looking for my muse. On the table sat a sign that read “$20” and a stack of books sat next to it. I picked up the book and flipped through it. It was well illustrated – gotta love an easy read– and the concepts were exactly what I wanted to know more about as I personally studied story and worked with my clients on finding and crafting their stories. So I dropped $20 bucks, took a book and tucked it in my bag. I used the Circle of the 9 Muses for the development of my Story Launchpad workshop and got a much broader view of helping organizations extract their stories. So, I knew David and worked with his stuff way before I made contact with him as a person. Needless to say, I’m super stoked to hop on this conversation with him because business leaders out there – this is the real stuff.

             David is the author of Circle of the 9 Muses: A Storytelling Field Guide for Innovators and Meaning Makers,  and is creator of the Learning Fables — a book series that uses narrative and metaphor to illustrate principles of organizational learning.

             With titles that include “Outlearning the Wolves” and “Shadows of the Neanderthal,” the popular business fables have sold more than a quarter-million copies in over a dozen languages.section of narrative, leadership, and complex systems change for more than 20 years.

             Besides being a bestselling author, business writer and learning designer, he created solutions for The Coca-Cola Company, PayPal, Wal-Mart, Accenture, IBM, L’Oreal, The US Olympic Committee, and others. He travels the world and shares his knowledge of story and how to use it with big business. So stay tuned for the good stuff!

              

             To hear our conversation on using story to create connection in all parts of life – business, personal, and even in a college entrance interview, tune into the audio program.

             To follow or get in touch with David:

             Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DavidHutchens9Muse/
             Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidbhutchens/
             LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/davidhutchens/
             Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidbhutchens

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4083Wed, 06 Feb 2019 09:00:13 -070037:47falsefullMy interview today is with David Hutchens, the author of Circle of the 9 Muses: A Storytelling Field Guide for Innovators and Meaning Makers,  and is creator of the Learning Fables -- a book series that uses narrative and metaphor to illustrate principles of organizational learning. With titles that include "Outlearning the Wolves" and "Shadows of the Neanderthal," the popular business fables have sold more than a quarter-million copies in over a dozen languages.section of narrative, leadership, and complex systems change for more than 20 years. Today we talk about creating connection with story - in business, in our personal lives, and even in a college admittance interview. Tune in today to hear a down-to-earth conversation about how businesses and people are using story to remove the barriers that stand between them and to create new levels of understanding that result in sales, connection, and even scholarship.Lori LeeEpisode 124 Hope – A Light in the DarkEpisode 124 Hope – A Light in the Dark

              

             Desmond Tutu said, “Hope is being able to see that there is light despite all of the darkness.”

             You don’t get out of bed in the morning without hope. We have hope in many things. Hope in God, hope in family, hope our efforts will bear fruit, hope we’ll find that perfect someone, hope we’ll overcome a sickness, hope that life holds beauty, hope the toilet won’t back up, hope our kids will live well, hope we get the job, hope we get pregnant, hope we don’t get pregnant, hope we’ll lose 10 lbs.…hope is the reason we keep on keepin on. But what happens when you hit those patches, the dissolving of a relationship, the terminal diagnosis, the loss of a job, severe bullying, despair and overwhelming self-criticism for another failure, and hope gets up and walks out of the room?

             A few years ago a friend separated from her husband. She moved to a new town, she started doing emotional work and building a new community around her, but her hope ebbed and flowed. “What can I do for you?” I asked. “I just need hope” she said, “and sometimes that’s hard to come by.” So this episode is for her, and for all the people who have moments where that light of hope isn’t visible in the storm you are currently in – that would be all of us.

             One of the spaces and stories that creates hopelessness is that space of feeling as if we have failed, are failing, or are destined to keep screwing things up. This heavy space is like a drain that sucks the light right out of our souls. So let me share an idea that I heard in church the other day:

             When a parent pays for a child to take piano lessons so that they can learn a new skill, develop a talent, understand music, they do not expect the child will sit down and instantly be a concert pianist. They hope the child will sit and practice day after day before even a beginner song can be played. They don’t want the child to pay them back for the lessons, they want the child to take the opportunity given to them to learn something new. They hope the child will respond to the gift and keep practicing year after year until the skill is acquired.

             So it is with our Heavenly Father/Mother, with God. We have been given opportunities in our lives to learn many, many things. We often learn these things through trial and error. God doesn’t expect us to be an expert at them out of the gate. We will practice love. We will practice disciplining our minds and bodies, we will practice patience. We will practice overcoming judgment. We will practice sharing and playing nice. We will practice loving ourselves. We will practice healthy boundaries. We will practice living big. We will practice communicating well. Every day we will have opportunities to practice, with every interaction and experience before us. We always get to keep trying. And, we are all practicing different songs.

             It’s important to remember that there is never a fall or a fail, a wrong note, where we should stay down. It’s common that when we feel we have failed at something – a marriage, self-control, an expectation, something new we tried, that dark mists of shame and hopelessness, discouragement and futility can easily start to build and swirl at our feet  – this is the common human experience. My belief is that it is the adversary looking for every crack in our armor, in an attempt to drain us of hope and increase the darkness we live in. Whether or not you believe in an adversary – a force of darkness that competes with the light, it is the human experience to feel both darkness and light and to choose which they will gravitate toward.  For me the hope comes from not staying in a place of self beat-up, but instead asking myself what I learned from the situation and then being kind to myself and moving forward with the new knowledge I gained to try again – to keep moving toward light.  We are never unworthy or unwanted.  We are simply...]]>Episode 124 Hope – A Light in the Dark

              

             Desmond Tutu said, “Hope is being able to see that there is light despite all of the darkness.”

             You don’t get out of bed in the morning without hope. We have hope in many things. Hope in God, hope in family, hope our efforts will bear fruit, hope we’ll find that perfect someone, hope we’ll overcome a sickness, hope that life holds beauty, hope the toilet won’t back up, hope our kids will live well, hope we get the job, hope we get pregnant, hope we don’t get pregnant, hope we’ll lose 10 lbs.…hope is the reason we keep on keepin on. But what happens when you hit those patches, the dissolving of a relationship, the terminal diagnosis, the loss of a job, severe bullying, despair and overwhelming self-criticism for another failure, and hope gets up and walks out of the room?

             A few years ago a friend separated from her husband. She moved to a new town, she started doing emotional work and building a new community around her, but her hope ebbed and flowed. “What can I do for you?” I asked. “I just need hope” she said, “and sometimes that’s hard to come by.” So this episode is for her, and for all the people who have moments where that light of hope isn’t visible in the storm you are currently in – that would be all of us.

             One of the spaces and stories that creates hopelessness is that space of feeling as if we have failed, are failing, or are destined to keep screwing things up. This heavy space is like a drain that sucks the light right out of our souls. So let me share an idea that I heard in church the other day:

             When a parent pays for a child to take piano lessons so that they can learn a new skill, develop a talent, understand music, they do not expect the child will sit down and instantly be a concert pianist. They hope the child will sit and practice day after day before even a beginner song can be played. They don’t want the child to pay them back for the lessons, they want the child to take the opportunity given to them to learn something new. They hope the child will respond to the gift and keep practicing year after year until the skill is acquired.

             So it is with our Heavenly Father/Mother, with God. We have been given opportunities in our lives to learn many, many things. We often learn these things through trial and error. God doesn’t expect us to be an expert at them out of the gate. We will practice love. We will practice disciplining our minds and bodies, we will practice patience. We will practice overcoming judgment. We will practice sharing and playing nice. We will practice loving ourselves. We will practice healthy boundaries. We will practice living big. We will practice communicating well. Every day we will have opportunities to practice, with every interaction and experience before us. We always get to keep trying. And, we are all practicing different songs.

             It’s important to remember that there is never a fall or a fail, a wrong note, where we should stay down. It’s common that when we feel we have failed at something – a marriage, self-control, an expectation, something new we tried, that dark mists of shame and hopelessness, discouragement and futility can easily start to build and swirl at our feet  – this is the common human experience. My belief is that it is the adversary looking for every crack in our armor, in an attempt to drain us of hope and increase the darkness we live in. Whether or not you believe in an adversary – a force of darkness that competes with the light, it is the human experience to feel both darkness and light and to choose which they will gravitate toward.  For me the hope comes from not staying in a place of self beat-up, but instead asking myself what I learned from the situation and then being kind to myself and moving forward with the new knowledge I gained to try again – to keep moving toward light.  We are never unworthy or unwanted.  We are simply practicing. Hopelessness would have you throw the music down and stomp off when you hit the wrong notes. Hope comes from the understanding that we are definitely going to hit wrong notes – a lot of them. And, that’s okay, expected, but we are blessed to try again.

             If you have children, you will remember when they were learning to walk or to ride a bike. When they fell you never once thought, “Oh, well that child has fallen, he/she is now unworthy to continue to try.” We must be as loving and supportive to ourselves. We are learning every day, and every day we get to keep trying. Maybe that trying involves creating boundaries that support you – moving away from social media or peers who bring you down. Maybe trying is seeking therapy or outside help. Maybe trying is just changing stories that are holding you back. Maybe trying is new affirmations. Maybe trying in just practicing loving that person you really don’t love right now. Maybe trying is getting out of bed and looking beyond yourself.

             Each one of us is a sacred being. We are beautiful and beloved and full of potential and talent. Even if we aren’t fully aware of all the power and beauty we hold, we most certainly are vibrant and sacred. Every one of us.

             In her book, You are Magnificent, Ganel-Lynne Condi said, “Do the best you can with the information and factors you have at the time; that really is the best you can do.”

             She goes on to share that a therapist once told her that hope is not a feeling, it is a choice. A choice to keep choosing a plan B when plan A doesn’t work out. “So,” she says, “if plan A hasn’t worked like you hoped, keep choosing another plan B. Maintain and protect the hope and love you still have, and seek out sources that will expand that light…this is how we can keep acting instead of being acted upon.”

             Three final ideas I want to share with you that give me hope:

             1. In the Old Testament when Moses was leading the Children of Isreal out of 400 years of slavery in Egypt, he finds himself in the desert with hordes of people who need food and water. I imagine this would have felt like a pretty hopeless situation, but with the prayers of Moses, the Lord gave them manna, or a bread-like substance, that they would find on the ground each morning. Every day they would wake and be able to collect what they needed to survive.
             
             

              

             I have a saying on my wall to remind me that God has my back – that his love is distilled upon me every day no matter the circumstance. It says, “The Lord’s love distills upon us as manna. Manna comes daily.”

              

             Every day that I wake up and stare out the window into the world and face whatever I’m facing, hope tells me that there will be manna out there. I will find what I need to do what I have to do and learn what I need to learn and I am exactly where I’m supposed to be right now –even if it’s in the middle of a storm.  The fact that God will distill upon me daily little pieces of his love his huge, but at the foundation of this is the healing power of the atonement of Christ. He forgives us over and over and over – not as a burden, but as a joyful grace. He forgives us frequently and freely. He never tires of our efforts to learn and grow. Knowing this, even when I don’t completely understand how the process of cleansing works, simply that I can keep trying and he’ll keep doing his part. This creates hope. I don’t overcomplicate it – I just keep trying.

              

             Faith, trust and hope are certainly very tight bedfellows.

              

             2. The second is what I call the Experimental Mindset. What is experience? It is an experiment. When you try something new you are doing an experiment, and with that experiment you get an experience. And, sometimes – most of the time when we try something we’ve never done before we suck at it. It’s supposed to be that way. Try something you’ve never done. Some parts will work, some parts will need to be tweaked, and then you try again. When you think about it this way it’s less daunting to try things for the first time.
             
             

             First project. First Client. First date.

             Experience tells you if you want to do it again, how to do it better the next time, each step is a new experiment, a new experience, a new chance to get it right. Even if it goes wrong, it was just an experiment.

             John Lee Dumas, successful  podcaster, business man and entrepreneur said, “I make mistakes daily. Some big, some small. I make mistakes because I’m a doer. I’ve become a recognized authority because I’m a doer, not because I don’t make mistakes.”

             And the third one is people…

             3. One of the things that has repeatedly stood out to me in my interviews on this podcast is that when people are in their darkest spaces, sometimes the thing they learn is how much other people around them care. Sometimes the hard spaces require that we ask for help or to be vulnerable and then unexpectedly people step up. So many of the interviews I’ve conducted have had sections where the big take-away is that we are not alone on our experimental journey. If you feel alone, reach out. There are people to catch you.
             
             

             Let me share a story from Oprah, in her book,  What I know for Sure, she shares:

             “In times of crisis, I’ve always marveled at the way people reach out with words of encouragement. I’ve had moments of real devastation in my life –we all have—but I’ve been sustained by the grace and love of friends who have asked, “Is there anything I can do to help?” not knowing that they already have, just by asking. People I’ve known well and others I’ve never met have, in touch moments built me a bridge of support. I’ll never forget when, after a particularly difficult setback a few years ago, my friend BeBe Winans stopped by unexpectedly. “There’s something I came to tell you,” he said. And started singing what he knows is my favorite spiritual: “I surrender all. I surrender all. All to thee, my blessed Savior, I surrender all.” I sat silently, closed my eyes, and opened myself to his gift of love and song. When he finished, I felt a release of pressure. I was content to just be. And for the first time in weeks, I experienced pure peace. When I opened my eyes and wiped away the tears, BeBe was beaming. He started laughing and gave me a big hug. “Girls,” he said, “I just came ot remind you, you don’t have to carry this load all by yourself.” To know that people care about how you’re doing when the doing isn’t so good – that’s what love is. I feel blessed to know this for sure.”

              

             Hopelessness is the plague of our day. As suicide rates soar, depression and anxiety become the norm, and drug addiction increases, we see manifest amongst us all the results of hopelessness in the most severe ways. It becomes a space of darkness that takes over the minds and hearts of our societies. It might ebb and flow, but when it’s in the flow we desperately need a light – something, a candle, a flickering flame before us that we can see far enough ahead to keep moving forward instead of giving up.

             Can I encourage you, if you are NOT in that dark space, to be the light for someone else. And if you are, to remember that life is an experiment, a time to practice our songs, and wrong notes are just part of learning. Reach out if you need help, because often the disconnectedness of our digital age is part of the problem.

             Keep trying because you are sacred, you are needed, and everything you’re going through is preparing you to be who you need to be and to do what you need to do. You are the hero of your story, fighting the dragon for the pot of gold you cannot see on the other side of the fight.

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4076Wed, 30 Jan 2019 09:00:34 -070018:50falsefullYou don’t get out of bed in the morning without hope. We have hope in many things. Hope in God, hope in family, hope our efforts will bear fruit, hope we’ll find that perfect someone, hope we’ll overcome a sickness, hope that life holds beauty, hope the toilet won’t back up, hope our kids will live well, hope we get the job, hope we get pregnant, hope we don’t get pregnant, hope we’ll lose 10 lbs.…hope is the reason we keep on keepin on. But what happens when you hit those patches, the dissolving of a relationship, the terminal diagnosis, the loss of a job, severe bullying, despair and overwhelming self-criticism for another failure, and hope gets up and walks out of the room? Today's episode is all about HOPE - the good stuff. Tune in to find a little - or a lot.Lori LeeEpisode 123 Interview Jeff Soelberg: Losing a Hand – Giving a HandEpisode 123 Interview Jeff Soelberg: Losing a Hand – Giving a Hand

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast where I get to interview people with STORIES! Getting down to the nitty-gritty of real life. What we really experience, what we struggle with, how we overcome, and the journey of the hero along that path – falling down and getting up.

             Today I bring Jeff Soelberg to the table.  He’s just your average middle age guy whose life changed for the better on July 6, 2016, when he lost 3 of his fingers in a work accident and severely damaged his wrist. Over 8 months and 6 surgeries, hundreds of stitches and 1000s of hours of PT, he returned to work a different man. Jeff, instead of staying in the dark space created by the loss of the use of his hand decided to look for the news doors this could open for him. He now has a mechanical addition to his hand and he’s embraced the CrossFit competitions where he’s excelled and met inspiring individuals.  Stay tuned to hear about his story.

             The night of Jeff’s accident his surgeon told him that he wouldn’t be able to lift weights again. He didn’t accept that and today he takes pride in proving his surgeon wrong.  He’s a 55 year old who is competing against 20 and 30-year-olds in adaptive CrossFit competitions. He’s a big proponent of sharing the idea that we can overcome any challenge, climb any mountain we set our minds to and that we can do it no matter our age or ability.

             Tune into the audio program for my interview with Jeff. Since the interview Jeff has continued to create new and exciting things:

             In September he set the Indoor Rowing World Record for the 1/2 marathon 21097 meters in the Physically Disabled over 50 division. 1 hour 34 min 28 sec.
             He participated in the first ever Para Spartan Elite Race in Laughlin, Nevada.
             He has been peaking to groups about overcoming challenges.
             He started to do testing with his prosthetic manufacturer. Test the limits and abilities of my hands.
             To follow his new foundation that is in the works:
             Website: www.jeffgivingahand.org

              

             Michelle Obama said, “You should never view your challenges as a disadvantage. Instead, it’s important for you to understand that your experience facing and overcoming adversity is actually one of your biggest advantages.”

             I believe Jeff exemplifies this. He’s a great example of taking a challenging situation and finding the silver-lining; making the best of it; taking it a step further to try and encourage others.

             Your challenge for this week is to think about what your largest challenge is right now at this moment in time. Can you find 5 things to be grateful for regarding this challenge? What are you learning from it? What people has it brought into your life? What opportunities has it created? Give it a little thought and you’ll find that there is always a silver lining and finding it not only broadens your perspective, it’s also the key that starts to change the energy and anxiety that surrounds the challenge.

             Have a great week out there creating your best life stories. Share this episode with someone you feel it might inspire and we’ll see you next week on the Love Your Story podcast.

             ]]>Episode 123 Interview Jeff Soelberg: Losing a Hand – Giving a Hand

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast where I get to interview people with STORIES! Getting down to the nitty-gritty of real life. What we really experience, what we struggle with, how we overcome, and the journey of the hero along that path – falling down and getting up.

             Today I bring Jeff Soelberg to the table.  He’s just your average middle age guy whose life changed for the better on July 6, 2016, when he lost 3 of his fingers in a work accident and severely damaged his wrist. Over 8 months and 6 surgeries, hundreds of stitches and 1000s of hours of PT, he returned to work a different man. Jeff, instead of staying in the dark space created by the loss of the use of his hand decided to look for the news doors this could open for him. He now has a mechanical addition to his hand and he’s embraced the CrossFit competitions where he’s excelled and met inspiring individuals.  Stay tuned to hear about his story.

             The night of Jeff’s accident his surgeon told him that he wouldn’t be able to lift weights again. He didn’t accept that and today he takes pride in proving his surgeon wrong.  He’s a 55 year old who is competing against 20 and 30-year-olds in adaptive CrossFit competitions. He’s a big proponent of sharing the idea that we can overcome any challenge, climb any mountain we set our minds to and that we can do it no matter our age or ability.

             Tune into the audio program for my interview with Jeff. Since the interview Jeff has continued to create new and exciting things:

             In September he set the Indoor Rowing World Record for the 1/2 marathon 21097 meters in the Physically Disabled over 50 division. 1 hour 34 min 28 sec.
             He participated in the first ever Para Spartan Elite Race in Laughlin, Nevada.
             He has been peaking to groups about overcoming challenges.
             He started to do testing with his prosthetic manufacturer. Test the limits and abilities of my hands.
             To follow his new foundation that is in the works:
             Website: www.jeffgivingahand.org

              

             Michelle Obama said, “You should never view your challenges as a disadvantage. Instead, it’s important for you to understand that your experience facing and overcoming adversity is actually one of your biggest advantages.”

             I believe Jeff exemplifies this. He’s a great example of taking a challenging situation and finding the silver-lining; making the best of it; taking it a step further to try and encourage others.

             Your challenge for this week is to think about what your largest challenge is right now at this moment in time. Can you find 5 things to be grateful for regarding this challenge? What are you learning from it? What people has it brought into your life? What opportunities has it created? Give it a little thought and you’ll find that there is always a silver lining and finding it not only broadens your perspective, it’s also the key that starts to change the energy and anxiety that surrounds the challenge.

             Have a great week out there creating your best life stories. Share this episode with someone you feel it might inspire and we’ll see you next week on the Love Your Story podcast.

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4073Wed, 23 Jan 2019 09:00:48 -070048:15falsefullToday I bring Jeff Soelberg to the table.  He’s just your average middle age guy whose life changed for the better on July 6, 2016, when he lost 3 of his fingers in a work accident and severely damaged his wrist. Over 8 months and 6 surgeries, hundreds of stitches and 1000s of hours of PT, he returned to work a different man. A better man - with a whole new life.Lori LeeEpisode 122 Interview Madeleine Black: Gang Rape and the Ultimate Act of CourageEpisode 122 Interview with Madeleine Black

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. On the podcast I have shared stories of everything from eating disorders, infertility, losing a child, suicide, death of a spouse….lots of hard things that people have experienced, overcome and learned and grown from. Today’s story is dark. This is the first story shared on the podcast about rape.  Violently gang-raped when she was thirteen years old, and raped three more times before the age of eighteen, Madeleine has experienced more trauma in her life than most ever will. Living in a state of shock and self-loathing, it took her years of struggle to confront the buried memories of that first attack and begin to undo the damage it wrought, as men continued to take advantage of her fragility in the worst possible way.

             Yet, after growing up with a burden no teenager should ever have to shoulder, she found the heart to carry out the best revenge plan of all; leading a fulfilling and happy life.  For Madeleine, forgiveness was the key.  True forgiveness takes genuine effort.  It takes a real desire to understand those who have done us so much harm.  It is the ultimate act of courage.

             Today she tells the story of finding her voice and her heart and an acceptance of herself. Stay tuned for her story, and know that we tell these stories on the podcast,  not to focus on the hard spaces, but to celebrate the people who learn, grow and thrive despite the dark and terrible roads we walk.

              

             Madeline Black wrote a book called Unbroken.

             In Unbroken, Madeleine tells her deeply moving and empowering story, as she discovers that life is about how a person chooses to recover from adversity.  We are not defined by what knocks us down – we are defined by how we get back up.

             She says,

             ‘If anyone had told me a few years ago that one day I would be giving radio and TV interviews, speaking publicly or writing a book; I would never have believed them.  But after sharing my story publicly for the first time in September 2014 I realized that my voice and words are now my strength and I will continue to speak out against sexual violence for all those who can’t find their voice yet…’

             Tune in for the audio program and her Madeleine tell her own story.

             For more information on Madeleine:

             Website: www.madeleineblack.co.uk
             Twitter: www.twitter.com/madblack65
             Facebook: www.facebook.com/MadeleineBlackUnbroken
             Book link: https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/reviews/B06XNLZ8RV/ref=cm_cr_arp_mb_viewopt_srt?ie=UTF8&sortBy=recent&pageNumber=1

              

             The things that happen to us do not define who we are. It is what we do with the things that happen to us that creates our strength and learning. Madeliene’s shared ideas of love winning over hate, and sharing her authentic path of events that happened, but also her natural response to those events, and then her learning to overcome those horrible spaces through accepting love. Love – the key to opening many doors, is a powerful story. So many of us have]]>Episode 122 Interview with Madeleine Black

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. On the podcast I have shared stories of everything from eating disorders, infertility, losing a child, suicide, death of a spouse….lots of hard things that people have experienced, overcome and learned and grown from. Today’s story is dark. This is the first story shared on the podcast about rape.  Violently gang-raped when she was thirteen years old, and raped three more times before the age of eighteen, Madeleine has experienced more trauma in her life than most ever will. Living in a state of shock and self-loathing, it took her years of struggle to confront the buried memories of that first attack and begin to undo the damage it wrought, as men continued to take advantage of her fragility in the worst possible way.

             Yet, after growing up with a burden no teenager should ever have to shoulder, she found the heart to carry out the best revenge plan of all; leading a fulfilling and happy life.  For Madeleine, forgiveness was the key.  True forgiveness takes genuine effort.  It takes a real desire to understand those who have done us so much harm.  It is the ultimate act of courage.

             Today she tells the story of finding her voice and her heart and an acceptance of herself. Stay tuned for her story, and know that we tell these stories on the podcast,  not to focus on the hard spaces, but to celebrate the people who learn, grow and thrive despite the dark and terrible roads we walk.

              

             Madeline Black wrote a book called Unbroken.

             In Unbroken, Madeleine tells her deeply moving and empowering story, as she discovers that life is about how a person chooses to recover from adversity.  We are not defined by what knocks us down – we are defined by how we get back up.

             She says,

             ‘If anyone had told me a few years ago that one day I would be giving radio and TV interviews, speaking publicly or writing a book; I would never have believed them.  But after sharing my story publicly for the first time in September 2014 I realized that my voice and words are now my strength and I will continue to speak out against sexual violence for all those who can’t find their voice yet…’

             Tune in for the audio program and her Madeleine tell her own story.

             For more information on Madeleine:

             Website: www.madeleineblack.co.uk
             Twitter: www.twitter.com/madblack65
             Facebook: www.facebook.com/MadeleineBlackUnbroken
             Book link: https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/reviews/B06XNLZ8RV/ref=cm_cr_arp_mb_viewopt_srt?ie=UTF8&sortBy=recent&pageNumber=1

              

             The things that happen to us do not define who we are. It is what we do with the things that happen to us that creates our strength and learning. Madeliene’s shared ideas of love winning over hate, and sharing her authentic path of events that happened, but also her natural response to those events, and then her learning to overcome those horrible spaces through accepting love. Love – the key to opening many doors, is a powerful story. So many of us have our own hard stories. We all look for others who have had similar experiences so that we can find our way to navigate the hard places. That’s why we share stories.

             Your challenge this week is to share the love – share this episode or one of the other inspiring Love Your Story podcast episodes with someone in your life who could stand to use a story that show the human spirit in overcoming and leaning into love.

             www.loveyourstorypodcast.com

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4068Wed, 16 Jan 2019 09:00:26 -070022:32falsefullToday’s story is dark. This is the first story shared on the podcast about rape.  Violently gang-raped when she was thirteen years old, and raped three more times before the age of eighteen, Madeleine has experienced more trauma in her life than most ever will. Living in a state of shock and self-loathing, it took her years of struggle to confront the buried memories of that first attack and begin to undo the damage it wrought, as men continued to take advantage of her fragility in the worst possible way. Yet, after growing up with a burden no teenager should ever have to shoulder, she found the heart to carry out the best revenge plan of all; leading a fulfilling and happy life.  For Madeleine, forgiveness was the key.  True forgiveness takes genuine effort.  It takes a real desire to understand those who have done us so much harm.  It is the ultimate act of courage. Tune in for her raw story.Lori LeeEpisode 121 The Iron Cowboy – Interview with James Lawrence: What is your Impossible?Episode 121: James Lawrence – The Iron Cowboy

             Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast. I have a question for you. What is YOUR impossible? What boundaries have you set on yourself for how far you can go? It’s commonly acknowledged that we set our own limits on ourselves, and this idea of redefining impossible got really serious with today’s guest James Lawrence, aka the Iron Cowboy.

             James got the nickname after he started wearing a cowboy hat during the marathon portion of his Ironman races so he could easily be identified by his five children.  Originally from Calgary Canada, he now lives in Utah with his wife Sunny their kids.  With two Guinness world records under his belt, James and his family attempted to take his endurance even further and do something every person deemed impossible. Complete 50 Ironmans in 50 consecutive days in all 50 states. Did he do it? Stay tuned to find out. And, let’s talk about redefining impossible.

              

             When James announced his plan to complete 50 Ironmans in 50 consecutive days in all 50 states everyone thought he was crazy.  An Ironman consists of a 2.4-mile swim, a 112-mile bike ride, and a 26.2-mile run – a marathon. In Lawrence’s case, he would have to complete those distances and then make it to the next state in time to do it all over again the next day. Even Lawrence’s coach didn’t think he could do it.

             When I met James Lawrence he was standing in a REAL soccer box raising funds and selling his book: Iron Cowboy. I got a copy that night and started reading it the following week. All I can say is holy shit. That was one painful, crazy-ass, unbelievable journey. His book is the story of his herculean 50-day journey and all the wonderful, miserable, and life-threatening events that happened along the way, as well as a glance at his life leading up to the mission, and winning two prior world records. Lawrence holds two world records in the Guinness Book of World Records: one for completing 22 half-Ironmans in one year (2010) and one for completing 30 full Ironmans in one year (2012). In 2015, he started out on this crazy quest to set a record for completing 50 Ironman distances in 50 states in 50 days.

             Along the way, Lawrence survived tropical storms, internal bleeding, hypothermia, hyperthermia, dehydration, nerve damage, infected foot blisters, a blood-clot scare, extreme sleep deprivation (he only got four to five hours of sleep each night), and a bike crash!

              

             Tune into the audio program for my interview with the Iron Cowboy and hear his stories and thoughts, including:

             “No matter how extreme my suffering became, it was only suffering.”

             “We’re not entirely on our own, because we can draw inspiration to achieve our own impossible, by seeing others conquer theirs.”

             “The good you do is not always the good you expected to do.”

             “The one thing I could control was my attitude, so I decided the predicament was a test rather than a setback. Unable to change my situation, I changed its meaning instead.” Can you tell us about this particular situation and your thoughts on it?

              

             After this feat, Sports Illustrated ranked James in the top 50 fittest freaks with the likes of Lebron James and Connor McGregor, 2 of James favorite athletes.  RedBull declares that ‘when it comes to endurance, he is unstoppable’ and Success magazine named him ‘The Most Enduring Man In The World’.  He has literally Redefine the definition of impossible.

             To learn more about James, buy his book, or follow him:

             James Lawrence
             Episode 121: James Lawrence – The Iron Cowboy

             Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast. I have a question for you. What is YOUR impossible? What boundaries have you set on yourself for how far you can go? It’s commonly acknowledged that we set our own limits on ourselves, and this idea of redefining impossible got really serious with today’s guest James Lawrence, aka the Iron Cowboy.

             James got the nickname after he started wearing a cowboy hat during the marathon portion of his Ironman races so he could easily be identified by his five children.  Originally from Calgary Canada, he now lives in Utah with his wife Sunny their kids.  With two Guinness world records under his belt, James and his family attempted to take his endurance even further and do something every person deemed impossible. Complete 50 Ironmans in 50 consecutive days in all 50 states. Did he do it? Stay tuned to find out. And, let’s talk about redefining impossible.

              

             When James announced his plan to complete 50 Ironmans in 50 consecutive days in all 50 states everyone thought he was crazy.  An Ironman consists of a 2.4-mile swim, a 112-mile bike ride, and a 26.2-mile run – a marathon. In Lawrence’s case, he would have to complete those distances and then make it to the next state in time to do it all over again the next day. Even Lawrence’s coach didn’t think he could do it.

             When I met James Lawrence he was standing in a REAL soccer box raising funds and selling his book: Iron Cowboy. I got a copy that night and started reading it the following week. All I can say is holy shit. That was one painful, crazy-ass, unbelievable journey. His book is the story of his herculean 50-day journey and all the wonderful, miserable, and life-threatening events that happened along the way, as well as a glance at his life leading up to the mission, and winning two prior world records. Lawrence holds two world records in the Guinness Book of World Records: one for completing 22 half-Ironmans in one year (2010) and one for completing 30 full Ironmans in one year (2012). In 2015, he started out on this crazy quest to set a record for completing 50 Ironman distances in 50 states in 50 days.

             Along the way, Lawrence survived tropical storms, internal bleeding, hypothermia, hyperthermia, dehydration, nerve damage, infected foot blisters, a blood-clot scare, extreme sleep deprivation (he only got four to five hours of sleep each night), and a bike crash!

              

             Tune into the audio program for my interview with the Iron Cowboy and hear his stories and thoughts, including:

             “No matter how extreme my suffering became, it was only suffering.”

             “We’re not entirely on our own, because we can draw inspiration to achieve our own impossible, by seeing others conquer theirs.”

             “The good you do is not always the good you expected to do.”

             “The one thing I could control was my attitude, so I decided the predicament was a test rather than a setback. Unable to change my situation, I changed its meaning instead.” Can you tell us about this particular situation and your thoughts on it?

              

             After this feat, Sports Illustrated ranked James in the top 50 fittest freaks with the likes of Lebron James and Connor McGregor, 2 of James favorite athletes.  RedBull declares that ‘when it comes to endurance, he is unstoppable’ and Success magazine named him ‘The Most Enduring Man In The World’.  He has literally Redefine the definition of impossible.

             To learn more about James, buy his book, or follow him:

             James Lawrence

             james@ironcowboy.com

             Twitter: @ironcowboyjames

             Instagram: @ironcowboyjames

             Facebook: www.facebook.com/IronCowboy/

              

             Your challenge this week is to start to look at the boundaries you have placed on yourself? How can you blow past those? How can you fight the pain, or fear or stories that sit between you and what you’ve thought was possible for you? If James Lawrence can push through the unimaginable mental and physical pain and discipline required to do 50 Ironman races in 50 days, we are certainly capable looking at this example and digging deep into our own wells of endurance. Look at your self created boundaries and choose one this week to show it who’s boss.

             Thanks for tuning in for his fantastic story. If you like the show, please take a minute and leave a review on iTunes. It makes a big difference for us podcast folks, because it helps rank our shows. Share the love people and go out and create your best life story on purpose.

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4064Wed, 09 Jan 2019 09:00:49 -070033:52falsefullWhat is YOUR impossible? What boundaries have you set for yourself for how far you can go? It’s commonly acknowledged that we set our own limits, and this idea of redefining impossible got really serious with today’s guest James Lawrence, aka the Iron Cowboy. In 2015, he started out on this crazy quest to set a record for completing 50 Ironman distances in 50 states in 50 days. Tune in for his story about how he made this happen and how you can redefine your own impossibles.Lori LeeEpisode 120 Finding Joy – Those 5-Star MomentsEpisode 120 Finding Joy – Those 5-Star Moments

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today’s episode is about JOY! Men and women are that they might have joy and there is a simple way to find it. It’s all about paying attention to the in-between moments in our stories because that’s where the magic happens. Stay tuned for this quick reminder about being present to the moments that bring you joy and let’s get 2019 started off on the best possible foot – not so much about change, instead let’s just talk about finding the joy in our lives and living into it with gusto and new eyes.

             A life story holds those big moments. The ah-ha moments. The defining moments – the child is born, the lesson is learned, the new job is landed, the trip that started the domino effect is embarked upon.

             These are beautiful moments caught in the nets of memory, but the real magic isn’t there. The real magic is so much quieter. So quiet in fact, if you don’t open your eyes and heart you miss the magic all together – and that would be a shame, because this is the magic that makes joy the landscape.

             Let me explain.

             My favorite morning moment is sitting with a war mug of vanilla chai tea. Delicious, comforting and slow. It’s magic every morning.

             I love blue sky days with trees full of green leaves. As I walk my dog Rocky, around the block I revel in the color; joy and gratitude are like a deep sigh because instead of being caught up in what I have to do, or the latest stress, I stop and look and listen and say prayers of gratitude. I notice the sparkle of the sun off a puddle or the sound of kids playing and laughing, or the fresh air in my lungs. The little things we miss a million times a day because we don’t tune in.

             Laughing with my friends – really laughing, that’s a 5-star moment. Skiing a great line, a really good kiss, a freshly mowed lawn or vacuumed floor, real smiles on my son’s faces, quick and witty banter with my siblings.

             Life’s defining moments, the joyful spaces, require a simple awareness, or they pass in the fog of the day and your real spaces of joy with it, while we wait for that something big, that huge accomplishment, that next big win, that unforgettable event.

             My friend Tonya says her list of small magic includes hugs from her nephew Henry, kisses from her nieces, being photo bombed by her sister, smiling at strangers, making someone laugh, really good friends, reading and having a revelation.

             What are your 5-Star moments? And when they happen I want you to stop and take a breath, and just sit in the joy while you whisper out a gratitude.

             My life blooms in richness when I am aware of these moments. Every normal day feels rich and magic, supported and blessed. Yours can too. Right now.

             One of the reasons we get away from these details is that our 21^st Century minds have learned to skim everything. We live in information overload, so instead of soaking in the rich details of our lives, we skim the massive amounts of information and happenings around us to sort where we will put our focus. The down side of this type of management is that the details, the magic spaces, the little things become invisible.

             Research from Ohio State University points out that Although adults can beat children at most cognitive tasks, new research shows that children’s limitations can sometimes be their strength. In two studies, researchers found that adults were very good at remembering information they were told to focus on, and ignoring the rest. In contrast, 4- to 5-year-olds tended to pay attention to all the information that was presented to them – even when they were told to focus on one particular item. Proof that being childlike is a more joyful state.

             In an article in the HuffPost, Elaine Vilorio wrote in her article, The Art of Noticing, “As a whole, we take everything for...]]>Episode 120 Finding Joy – Those 5-Star Moments

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today’s episode is about JOY! Men and women are that they might have joy and there is a simple way to find it. It’s all about paying attention to the in-between moments in our stories because that’s where the magic happens. Stay tuned for this quick reminder about being present to the moments that bring you joy and let’s get 2019 started off on the best possible foot – not so much about change, instead let’s just talk about finding the joy in our lives and living into it with gusto and new eyes.

             A life story holds those big moments. The ah-ha moments. The defining moments – the child is born, the lesson is learned, the new job is landed, the trip that started the domino effect is embarked upon.

             These are beautiful moments caught in the nets of memory, but the real magic isn’t there. The real magic is so much quieter. So quiet in fact, if you don’t open your eyes and heart you miss the magic all together – and that would be a shame, because this is the magic that makes joy the landscape.

             Let me explain.

             My favorite morning moment is sitting with a war mug of vanilla chai tea. Delicious, comforting and slow. It’s magic every morning.

             I love blue sky days with trees full of green leaves. As I walk my dog Rocky, around the block I revel in the color; joy and gratitude are like a deep sigh because instead of being caught up in what I have to do, or the latest stress, I stop and look and listen and say prayers of gratitude. I notice the sparkle of the sun off a puddle or the sound of kids playing and laughing, or the fresh air in my lungs. The little things we miss a million times a day because we don’t tune in.

             Laughing with my friends – really laughing, that’s a 5-star moment. Skiing a great line, a really good kiss, a freshly mowed lawn or vacuumed floor, real smiles on my son’s faces, quick and witty banter with my siblings.

             Life’s defining moments, the joyful spaces, require a simple awareness, or they pass in the fog of the day and your real spaces of joy with it, while we wait for that something big, that huge accomplishment, that next big win, that unforgettable event.

             My friend Tonya says her list of small magic includes hugs from her nephew Henry, kisses from her nieces, being photo bombed by her sister, smiling at strangers, making someone laugh, really good friends, reading and having a revelation.

             What are your 5-Star moments? And when they happen I want you to stop and take a breath, and just sit in the joy while you whisper out a gratitude.

             My life blooms in richness when I am aware of these moments. Every normal day feels rich and magic, supported and blessed. Yours can too. Right now.

             One of the reasons we get away from these details is that our 21^st Century minds have learned to skim everything. We live in information overload, so instead of soaking in the rich details of our lives, we skim the massive amounts of information and happenings around us to sort where we will put our focus. The down side of this type of management is that the details, the magic spaces, the little things become invisible.

             Research from Ohio State University points out that Although adults can beat children at most cognitive tasks, new research shows that children’s limitations can sometimes be their strength. In two studies, researchers found that adults were very good at remembering information they were told to focus on, and ignoring the rest. In contrast, 4- to 5-year-olds tended to pay attention to all the information that was presented to them – even when they were told to focus on one particular item. Proof that being childlike is a more joyful state.

             In an article in the HuffPost, Elaine Vilorio wrote in her article, The Art of Noticing, “As a whole, we take everything for granted. If encountered frequently enough, people and tasks seem to become mundane and uninteresting. The walk to and from school becomes just another routine trudge. Your grandparents’ crankiness and need to talk about their past becomes a nuisance, something you are forced to listen to in order to maintain familial decorum. Your classmates and friends become people that you think you know well, or at least well enough…Your life, and everything in your life, seems to be relatively well-known. Yet, life is not like that at all. In fact, life is a wondrous, mysterious thing. Your life is something remarkable, with new things to be discovered every day, every hour, every second and every minute.

             Life is so interesting! I loathe, absolutely loathe, when I see my classmates, colleagues, or friends tweet or talk about how bored they are. How can one be utterly bored in this life? To appreciate this life, one must learn the art of noticing. Noticing is a skill that, at first, requires effort. You have to have the patience to look a second time or a third time or a fourth time or a millionth time. It never ends because there is always something to catch your attention. And it is okay to falter, to become frustrated and stop noticing for a while. One must remember, however, to always come back and notice.

             She continues…

             Not too long ago, I stumbled upon a blog titled “Walking to Listen” by a Mr. Andrew Forsthoefel, a 23-year-old noticing connoisseur. Andrew decided to start walking across the United States with one motive: to listen. Although Andrew is not the only person to begin this feat, his goal — the goal of listening — struck me as unheard of. In describing the reason for his walk, he writes, “I’m walking the country to listen. There’s no such thing as the Average Joe, no such thing as a boring, uninteresting, unexceptional life. This walk is to honor that. Life is fast, and I’ve found it’s easy to confuse the miraculous for the mundane, so I’m slowing down, way down, in order to give my full presence to the extraordinary that infuses each moment and resides in every one of us.” And so, he walks and he meets people, really truly meets them, and he learns their stories. He learns to see the beauty everywhere he crosses because there is beauty in even the shabbiest places and people. Therefore, he notices.”

             Joy becomes a moment by moment gift.  Today I’m talking about 5-star moments so we can all stop and take stock, reconnect with you by being in touch with your own delight. Today’s podcast is a reminder to savor the moments of your life. The in-between moments, because that’s where your personal magic lies. As we start this new year, my wish for all of us is that we find more joy. The beautiful part of this is that no matter how bad or how good our lives are, finding that joy is within our own power.

             By small and simple things our lives play out and those who learn to relish the magic moments are the lucky ones who live in joy. And, here’s the fun part…the more you practice seeing these magic moments, the more of them you see. It’s like they expand and reproduce, just because you’re paying attention. So….you can magnify the joyful moments, just by looking for them.

             Now that’s a great way to start out 2019,

             Your challenge this week: find your 5-star moments and acknowledge them as they happen. Find your joy in the daily magic. Once it’s a habit, the way you see your story shifts into spaces of fuller joy and recognition of the moments that bring that joy. I used to try to find a magic moment in every day. It’s fun. I’d wait for some wonderful glimpse of joy and then I’d claim it. “This is my magic moment,” I’d say to myself, and I’d just move on letting it soak into my heart. Now I look for more than one.

             Walt Whitman said, “Happiness, not in another place, but this place…not for another hour, but this hour…” What are you happy about right now?

             Share this episode with someone who could use it today. Who do you wish joy upon? See you next week on the Love Your Story podcast.

              

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4061Wed, 02 Jan 2019 09:00:47 -070014:34falsefullToday’s episode is about JOY! Men and women are that they might have joy and there is a simple way to find it. It’s all about paying attention to the in-between moments in our stories because that’s where the magic happens. Stay tuned for this quick reminder about being present to the moments that bring you joy and let’s get 2019 started off on the best possible foot – not so much about change, instead let’s just talk about finding the joy in our lives and living into it with gusto and new eyes.Lori LeeEpisode 119 Best of 2018Episode 119 Best of 2018

             It’s the last episode of 2018 and I want to thank all of you who are listening and all of those who have shared their brave and vulnerable stories on the show this year. It’s been a phenomenal year filled with crazy good episodes if I do say so myself.  I started this episode out wanting to do the BEST OF 2018, but realized as I surveyed the shows that if I did that it would be a VERY long episode, so my editor and I, pulled numbers at random to do a year-end review. Today’s episode does a quick reminder blurb from 10 of the top episodes of the past year. Listen in for some quick refreshers.

             We talk about 3 angles regarding story on this podcast – the first is the past. When we have stories that are holding us back we need to do the work to reframe them so we can move forward in our full power. The second is the present. Becoming aware of the stories we are telling ourselves today, especially about ourselves, creates or diminishes our power to live well and be who we came to be. And third, is the future. Every day we plant the seeds for our tomorrow – for the next chapter in our story  and so the things we do today matter to our future story.  This is the focus of our first flashback for 2018 – Doing acts of kindness in the world to create a better story. One of the episodes we did this year – episode 89 was a live discussion with the group who had gathered to do random acts of kindness. In this blurb Rebecca Dahl Cookston and I are discussing her experience and the effects   – uncomfortable and satisfying, of the RAK.

             Listen to the audio program to hear the conversation.

             In episode 72 I open a discussion about a story archetype. Story archetypes are the repetitive characters we see in our stories because they mark crucial points within a story – these are found in fairy tales, but also in our real-life stories. In this episode, I’m talking about the Threshold Guardian or the thing or person that stands as a block to you getting something you want. It’s important to understand this concept so that when your threshold guardians show up in real life you can see them for what they are.

             Listen to the audio program to hear the chosen segment.

             One of our most popular series this year was Episode 73-75 The Search for Annie Schmidt. Annie Schmidt, the daughter of John Schmidt the pianist from the popular group, the Piano Guys, went missing in 2016. The subsequent search for her and the discovery of her body was filled with miracles and cooperation.

             Listen to the audio program to hear a section from the trilogy where Annie’s mother talks about the miracle of hearing her daughter from the grave.

             Jennifer Anderson was meditating and talking with God at 3 a.m. one morning and she was inspired to create a journal. This journal entitled 3 a.m. with God changed her career path and her focus as she focuses on helping people listen, hear and act on inspiration.

             Listen to the audio program for a short segment of my chat with Jennifer.

             In episode 93 I talk about another story archetype – the Herald. These are real. There are moments when we are called into the adventures of our lives. Do we say no or do we say yes?

             Listen to the audio program for that segment.

             Mark Shurtleff, a past attorney general of Utah, shared a vulnerable personal interview with me about the toll the difficult events of the past few years took on him. His public face got personal in this interview  – episode 96.

             Listen to the audio program for the piece of our interview.

             You want someone to understand you better? Share a story that illustrates why you feel as you do. This is a key story tool. Tune into episode 70 for a whole discussion on sharing stories to create understanding.

             Tune into the audio program for a quick pointer about how to help others understand you better.

             In episode...]]>Episode 119 Best of 2018

             It’s the last episode of 2018 and I want to thank all of you who are listening and all of those who have shared their brave and vulnerable stories on the show this year. It’s been a phenomenal year filled with crazy good episodes if I do say so myself.  I started this episode out wanting to do the BEST OF 2018, but realized as I surveyed the shows that if I did that it would be a VERY long episode, so my editor and I, pulled numbers at random to do a year-end review. Today’s episode does a quick reminder blurb from 10 of the top episodes of the past year. Listen in for some quick refreshers.

             We talk about 3 angles regarding story on this podcast – the first is the past. When we have stories that are holding us back we need to do the work to reframe them so we can move forward in our full power. The second is the present. Becoming aware of the stories we are telling ourselves today, especially about ourselves, creates or diminishes our power to live well and be who we came to be. And third, is the future. Every day we plant the seeds for our tomorrow – for the next chapter in our story  and so the things we do today matter to our future story.  This is the focus of our first flashback for 2018 – Doing acts of kindness in the world to create a better story. One of the episodes we did this year – episode 89 was a live discussion with the group who had gathered to do random acts of kindness. In this blurb Rebecca Dahl Cookston and I are discussing her experience and the effects   – uncomfortable and satisfying, of the RAK.

             Listen to the audio program to hear the conversation.

             In episode 72 I open a discussion about a story archetype. Story archetypes are the repetitive characters we see in our stories because they mark crucial points within a story – these are found in fairy tales, but also in our real-life stories. In this episode, I’m talking about the Threshold Guardian or the thing or person that stands as a block to you getting something you want. It’s important to understand this concept so that when your threshold guardians show up in real life you can see them for what they are.

             Listen to the audio program to hear the chosen segment.

             One of our most popular series this year was Episode 73-75 The Search for Annie Schmidt. Annie Schmidt, the daughter of John Schmidt the pianist from the popular group, the Piano Guys, went missing in 2016. The subsequent search for her and the discovery of her body was filled with miracles and cooperation.

             Listen to the audio program to hear a section from the trilogy where Annie’s mother talks about the miracle of hearing her daughter from the grave.

             Jennifer Anderson was meditating and talking with God at 3 a.m. one morning and she was inspired to create a journal. This journal entitled 3 a.m. with God changed her career path and her focus as she focuses on helping people listen, hear and act on inspiration.

             Listen to the audio program for a short segment of my chat with Jennifer.

             In episode 93 I talk about another story archetype – the Herald. These are real. There are moments when we are called into the adventures of our lives. Do we say no or do we say yes?

             Listen to the audio program for that segment.

             Mark Shurtleff, a past attorney general of Utah, shared a vulnerable personal interview with me about the toll the difficult events of the past few years took on him. His public face got personal in this interview  – episode 96.

             Listen to the audio program for the piece of our interview.

             You want someone to understand you better? Share a story that illustrates why you feel as you do. This is a key story tool. Tune into episode 70 for a whole discussion on sharing stories to create understanding.

             Tune into the audio program for a quick pointer about how to help others understand you better.

             In episode 116 you get a special treat – the book – Key to your Super Self and how your Stories unlock your power in audio form. Here’s a blurb discussing how inner stories get created from a young age. To get this book in e-book form you can go to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and a pop-up box will come up where you can sign up for it.

             Tune into the audio program to hear the quick blurb from the book

             One of the loudest most destructive stories that goes on in our heads is an attack on our bodies. Episode 76 is dedicated to a discussion on how to stop this and accept your fabulous, blessed body that allows you to do all the great things you do.

             Tune into the audio program for some thoughts on loving our bodies.

             One of our latest episodes was an interview with Donna Marino who lost her father in 9/11 – I was honored to get to discuss these events with her with an inside individual look at this national tragedy.

             Tune into the audio episode for this clip from the Donna Marino episode.

             I am honored to be a party to listening and recording the personal, vulnerable, and raw stories of loss and triumph, fear and conquering, standing back up in the arena after the hard stuff hits, and celebrating and discussing ideas that help us all create the best life stories on purpose. Thanks for being a part of the Love Your Story audience. I hope you listen weekly for empowerment and inspiration and share each episode with someone you know who could use a light. Tune in next week as we start 2019, and be prepared for another fantastic year of stories and support in creating YOUR best life story on purpose.

             *There were soooo many good episodes and great stories in the past year. All of them deserved a spot in this episode, but we just couldn’t fit them all.

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4058Wed, 26 Dec 2018 09:00:02 -070030:25falsefullIt’s the last episode of 2018 and I started this episode out wanting to do the BEST OF 2018, but realized as I surveyed the shows that if I did that it would be a VERY long episode, so my editor and I, pulled numbers at random to do a year-end review. Today’s episode does a quick reminder blurb from 10 of the top episodes of the past year. Tune in for some quick story tips and reminders about powerful episodes.Lori LeeEpisode 118 Mitchell’s Story – A Father’s Story of Losing His Child to Muscular DystrophyEpisode 118 Mitchell’s Story – A Father’s Story of Losing his Child to Muscular Dystrophy

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. As we gather around the technology campfire and tell our stories, one of the stories we hope we never have to tell is one of losing a child. Of all the fears and tragedies, this one ranks in the top heartbreaks.

             Today, my interview with Chris Jones is a discussion about his son Mitchell, who passed away from heart failure in 2013, and the Facebook page titled Mitchell’s Journey that has gained international attention as a place for healing and gaining an understanding of the process of grieving.

             Chris Jones lives in Salt Lake City, Utah with his wife, Natalie and 3 living children. Their son, Mitchell Jones had Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy, a catastrophic muscle wasting disease that is fatal.

             Mitchell’s Journey has become a hope for many and his father speaks and shares insights on finding purpose, meaning and joy despite the difficulties we face. He talks about how gratitude is a great healer and how broken things mend. Eventually.

             Stay tuned for Mitchell’s story, Chris’s story, and some raw discussion on facing one of the hardest storylines possible.

             Vicky Harrison said, “Grief is like the ocean. It comes in waves, ebbing and flowing. Sometimes the water is calm and sometimes it is overwhelming. All we can do is learn to swim.”

             Tune in to the audio program for Chris’s retelling of his experience with his son’s illness and passing.

             For more information about Chris and Mitchell:

             https://www.facebook.com/mitchellsjourney/

             www.mitchellsjourney.org

             www.instagram.com/mitchells_journey

             #mitchellsjourney

             #babiesmadeofsan

              

             Mother Teresa said, “It’s not about how much we give, it’s how much love we put into giving.”

             Call to action: Spend time with the people you love. Really spend that looking-in-the-eye/belly laughing time with them. Don’t waste a moment, you don’t know how many you have.

             And, if you like the podcast, I’d appreciate you showing your appreciation for the show by leaving a review wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, remember the website – loveyourstorypodcast.com is always available with all the episodes, show notes, and tools like the 21 Challenges for creating your best life story on purpose. See you next week.

              

             ]]>Episode 118 Mitchell’s Story – A Father’s Story of Losing his Child to Muscular Dystrophy

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. As we gather around the technology campfire and tell our stories, one of the stories we hope we never have to tell is one of losing a child. Of all the fears and tragedies, this one ranks in the top heartbreaks.

             Today, my interview with Chris Jones is a discussion about his son Mitchell, who passed away from heart failure in 2013, and the Facebook page titled Mitchell’s Journey that has gained international attention as a place for healing and gaining an understanding of the process of grieving.

             Chris Jones lives in Salt Lake City, Utah with his wife, Natalie and 3 living children. Their son, Mitchell Jones had Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy, a catastrophic muscle wasting disease that is fatal.

             Mitchell’s Journey has become a hope for many and his father speaks and shares insights on finding purpose, meaning and joy despite the difficulties we face. He talks about how gratitude is a great healer and how broken things mend. Eventually.

             Stay tuned for Mitchell’s story, Chris’s story, and some raw discussion on facing one of the hardest storylines possible.

             Vicky Harrison said, “Grief is like the ocean. It comes in waves, ebbing and flowing. Sometimes the water is calm and sometimes it is overwhelming. All we can do is learn to swim.”

             Tune in to the audio program for Chris’s retelling of his experience with his son’s illness and passing.

             For more information about Chris and Mitchell:

             https://www.facebook.com/mitchellsjourney/

             www.mitchellsjourney.org

             www.instagram.com/mitchells_journey

             #mitchellsjourney

             #babiesmadeofsan

              

             Mother Teresa said, “It’s not about how much we give, it’s how much love we put into giving.”

             Call to action: Spend time with the people you love. Really spend that looking-in-the-eye/belly laughing time with them. Don’t waste a moment, you don’t know how many you have.

             And, if you like the podcast, I’d appreciate you showing your appreciation for the show by leaving a review wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, remember the website – loveyourstorypodcast.com is always available with all the episodes, show notes, and tools like the 21 Challenges for creating your best life story on purpose. See you next week.

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4049Wed, 19 Dec 2018 09:00:52 -070033:33falsefullAs we gather around the technology campfire and tell our stories, one of the stories we hope we never have to tell is one of losing a child. Of all the fears and tragedies, this one ranks in the top heartbreaks. Today, my interview with Chris Jones is a discussion about his son Mitchell, who passed away from heart failure in 2013, and the Facebook page titled Mitchell’s Journey that has gained international attention as a place for healing and gaining an understanding of the process of grieving.Lori LeeEpisode 117 Interview Donna Marino – My Dad Died on 9-11 in the Twin TowersEpisode 117 Interview Donna Marino – My Dad Died on 9-11 in the Twin Towers

             On September 11, 2001, nineteen men hijacked four fuel-loaded US commercial airplanes bound for west coast destinations. A total of 2,977 people were killed in New York City, Washington, DC and outside of Shanksville, Pennsylvania.

             The attack was orchestrated by alQaeda leader Osama bin Laden. At the World Trade Center site in Lower Manhattan, 2,753 people were killed when hijacked American Airlines Flight 11 and United Airlines Flight 175 were intentionally crashed into the north and south towers, or as a result of the crashes.

             The victims ranged in age from two to 85 years. Approximately 75-80% of the victims were men.

             At the Pentagon in Washington, 184 people were killed when hijacked American Airlines Flight 77 crashed into the building.

             Near Shanksville, Pennsylvania, 40 passengers and crew members aboard United Airlines Flight 93 died when the plane crashed into a field. It is believed that the hijackers crashed the plane in that location, rather than their unknown target, after the passengers and crew attempted to retake control of the flight deck.

             We all know of the tragedy of 9-11, you probably remember where you were at when you heard the news. Today I interview Donna Marino, a woman whose father, an electrician in the twin-towers, passed away on that fateful and terrible day. She takes us inside her story of events and shares how she worked through victimhood into a space her dad would be proud of – a space of releasing, renewing, and helping others through her work as a licensed clinical psychologist to do the same.

             Dr. Donna Marino is a licensed clinical psychologist, certified yoga teacher, Reiki practitioner and positive psychology coach who has been working in mental health for over 20 years. Dr. Marino is a mom of two tween girls and is married to the love of her life, the second time around.  She is also the surviving daughter of her father who was lost in the terror attacks on the twin towers on 9-11. Here’s her story.

             Tune in to the audio program for Donna’s story and experience in her own words.

             For more information on Dr. Donna Marino:

             www.inner-guidance.com

             https://www.facebook.com/drdonnamarino, https://www.linkedin.com/in/drdonnamarino/, https://twitter.com/GuidanceInner, https://www.pinterest.com/drdonnamarino/, https://www.pinterest.com/innerguidance0137/

              

             ]]>Episode 117 Interview Donna Marino – My Dad Died on 9-11 in the Twin Towers

             On September 11, 2001, nineteen men hijacked four fuel-loaded US commercial airplanes bound for west coast destinations. A total of 2,977 people were killed in New York City, Washington, DC and outside of Shanksville, Pennsylvania.

             The attack was orchestrated by alQaeda leader Osama bin Laden. At the World Trade Center site in Lower Manhattan, 2,753 people were killed when hijacked American Airlines Flight 11 and United Airlines Flight 175 were intentionally crashed into the north and south towers, or as a result of the crashes.

             The victims ranged in age from two to 85 years. Approximately 75-80% of the victims were men.

             At the Pentagon in Washington, 184 people were killed when hijacked American Airlines Flight 77 crashed into the building.

             Near Shanksville, Pennsylvania, 40 passengers and crew members aboard United Airlines Flight 93 died when the plane crashed into a field. It is believed that the hijackers crashed the plane in that location, rather than their unknown target, after the passengers and crew attempted to retake control of the flight deck.

             We all know of the tragedy of 9-11, you probably remember where you were at when you heard the news. Today I interview Donna Marino, a woman whose father, an electrician in the twin-towers, passed away on that fateful and terrible day. She takes us inside her story of events and shares how she worked through victimhood into a space her dad would be proud of – a space of releasing, renewing, and helping others through her work as a licensed clinical psychologist to do the same.

             Dr. Donna Marino is a licensed clinical psychologist, certified yoga teacher, Reiki practitioner and positive psychology coach who has been working in mental health for over 20 years. Dr. Marino is a mom of two tween girls and is married to the love of her life, the second time around.  She is also the surviving daughter of her father who was lost in the terror attacks on the twin towers on 9-11. Here’s her story.

             Tune in to the audio program for Donna’s story and experience in her own words.

             For more information on Dr. Donna Marino:

             www.inner-guidance.com

             https://www.facebook.com/drdonnamarino, https://www.linkedin.com/in/drdonnamarino/, https://twitter.com/GuidanceInner, https://www.pinterest.com/drdonnamarino/, https://www.pinterest.com/innerguidance0137/

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4046Wed, 12 Dec 2018 09:00:58 -070047:32falsefullWe all know of the tragedy of 9-11, you probably remember where you were at when you heard the news. Today I interview Donna Marino, a woman whose father, an electrician in the twin-towers, passed away on that fateful and terrible day. She takes us inside her story of events and shares how she worked through victimhood into a space her dad would be proud of – a space of releasing, renewing, and helping others through her work as a licensed clinical psychologist to do the same.Lori LeeEpisode 116 The Key to Your Super Self – How your Stories unlock your PowerEpisode 116 The Key to Your Super Self –

             How your Stories unlock your Power

              

             The Key to Your Super Self was originally an audio/e-book to help people become aware of the stories they tell themselves and how those stories either unlock their superpowers of self-love, faith and belief in our own possibility, or how those stories are key in causing us to live small lives.

             We bring it to you on today’s podcast – the full audio version, as a Christmas treat for your mind-set empowerment.

             If you prefer the e-book, send me an email at lorijlee@msn.com. I’ll email you the link.

              

              

             ]]>Episode 116 The Key to Your Super Self –

             How your Stories unlock your Power

              

             The Key to Your Super Self was originally an audio/e-book to help people become aware of the stories they tell themselves and how those stories either unlock their superpowers of self-love, faith and belief in our own possibility, or how those stories are key in causing us to live small lives.

             We bring it to you on today’s podcast – the full audio version, as a Christmas treat for your mind-set empowerment.

             If you prefer the e-book, send me an email at lorijlee@msn.com. I’ll email you the link.

              

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4042Wed, 05 Dec 2018 09:00:40 -070041:44falsefullThe Key to Your Super Self was originally an audio/e-book to help people become aware of the stories they tell themselves and how those stories either unlock their superpowers of self-love, faith and belief in our own possibility, or how those stories are key in causing us to live small lives.<br /> <br /> We bring it to you on today's podcast - the full audio version, as a Christmas treat for your mind-set empowerment.Lori LeeEpisode 115 Interview Sara Dean: A Story of the Struggle with InfertilityEpisode 115 Interview Sara Dean: A Story of the Struggle of Infertility

             Have you or someone you know struggled with infertility? Sara Dean – the creator and host of the popular podcast the Shameless Mom Academy, tells us her story of infertility, going through the emotional process of combating infertility, and the life changes that came as she successfully got pregnant with her son Vinny.  “I’m getting an F in making babies,” she bemoaned as she and her husband traveled this road of eager desperation. Tune in for the story of her journey, and our discussion on how we acquire life tools that help us stay healthy through these moments that bring you to your knees.

              

             Sara Dean is the creator and host of the Shameless Mom Academy Podcast, a top-rated podcast rapidly approaching 1 million downloads.  Sara’s biggest passion is helping women own their space.  After enduring her own identity crises following the birth of her son, Sara took her background in psychology/health/ wellness and rebuilt her identity, one step at a time.  Sara motivates and inspires women to stop shrinking and start growing.  She is on a mission to inspire women and moms, in particular, to live bigger, bolder, braver #everydamnday. Let’s get into our interview and her rollercoaster story of pushing through those spaces a hero pushes through to get the rewards they seek.

              

             Tune into the audio program for Sara Dean’s story.

             Find Sara: https://shamelessmom.com/

              

             We all have such different life stories, but they are tailor-made for each of us. The stories lines are diverse, but the similarities lie in the concept of challenge, overcoming, facing fear, rising when we are brought to our knees, or not. Loved the idea of reframing the story when it doesn’t turn out as we expect, and taking the power back for finding joy in our circumstances. As we each go through our lives we find the tricks and tricks – if we seek them – for living through the tough spaces and creating mindsets and self-care that buoy us up during the times we go to war with our challenges. If you don’t have your toolbox with the tried and true, go to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and under tools, choose the 21 Challenges and sign up for that system of trying out 21 LIFE Connection tools that you can personalize for your own support and live creation. Live big people and I’ll see you next week as we tell the next story!

             ]]>Episode 115 Interview Sara Dean: A Story of the Struggle of Infertility

             Have you or someone you know struggled with infertility? Sara Dean – the creator and host of the popular podcast the Shameless Mom Academy, tells us her story of infertility, going through the emotional process of combating infertility, and the life changes that came as she successfully got pregnant with her son Vinny.  “I’m getting an F in making babies,” she bemoaned as she and her husband traveled this road of eager desperation. Tune in for the story of her journey, and our discussion on how we acquire life tools that help us stay healthy through these moments that bring you to your knees.

              

             Sara Dean is the creator and host of the Shameless Mom Academy Podcast, a top-rated podcast rapidly approaching 1 million downloads.  Sara’s biggest passion is helping women own their space.  After enduring her own identity crises following the birth of her son, Sara took her background in psychology/health/ wellness and rebuilt her identity, one step at a time.  Sara motivates and inspires women to stop shrinking and start growing.  She is on a mission to inspire women and moms, in particular, to live bigger, bolder, braver #everydamnday. Let’s get into our interview and her rollercoaster story of pushing through those spaces a hero pushes through to get the rewards they seek.

              

             Tune into the audio program for Sara Dean’s story.

             Find Sara: https://shamelessmom.com/

              

             We all have such different life stories, but they are tailor-made for each of us. The stories lines are diverse, but the similarities lie in the concept of challenge, overcoming, facing fear, rising when we are brought to our knees, or not. Loved the idea of reframing the story when it doesn’t turn out as we expect, and taking the power back for finding joy in our circumstances. As we each go through our lives we find the tricks and tricks – if we seek them – for living through the tough spaces and creating mindsets and self-care that buoy us up during the times we go to war with our challenges. If you don’t have your toolbox with the tried and true, go to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and under tools, choose the 21 Challenges and sign up for that system of trying out 21 LIFE Connection tools that you can personalize for your own support and live creation. Live big people and I’ll see you next week as we tell the next story!

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4038Wed, 28 Nov 2018 09:00:31 -070039:25falsefullHave you or someone you know struggled with infertility? Sara Dean – the creator and host of the popular podcast the Shameless Mom Academy, tells us her story of infertility, going through the emotional process of combating infertility, and the life changes that came as she successfully got pregnant with her son Vinny.  “I’m getting an F in making babies,” she bemoaned as she and her husband traveled this road of eager desperation. Tune in for the story of her journey, and our discussion on how we acquire life tools that help us stay healthy through these moments that bring you to your knees.Lori LeeEpisode 114 Law of the HarvestEpisode 114

             Tomorrow Begins Today: Law of the Harvest

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. One of my favorite sayings is “Tomorrow Begins Today.”  I have the saying, torn from a magazine, stuck with one lone magnet to the front of my fridge. I look at it every day because it reminds me that what I am doing right now, in this moment, isn’t just about today, it’s about the law of the harvest. It’s about creating what I want in my life tomorrow, going forward. It’s about planting the seeds for the fruits I want to come forth. It’s about karma. It’s about active creation from a big picture perspective. It’s about planting and nurturing seeds in work, in relationships, in self-development, in learning. Tomorrow begins today and that means today is a powerful space to occupy.

              

             If you could harvest anything you wanted in your life, what would it be? It’s November, it’s harvest time. Thanksgiving is giving thanks for what we’ve harvested over the summer. Let’s think about this for a minute.

              

             When I was a child we lived in a small Idaho community and each summer my parents planted beans, potatoes, tomatoes, chard, onions, you name it.  We had a garden plot that ran down one whole side of our property and at the top of our alfalfa fields, we had another big garden- rows and rows of raspberry bushes. During the summer my dad would irrigate the garden, and my brothers and sister and I would splash in the water in our swimming suits as it flooded the lawn, but during the week, we’d pull weeds, every day. Before we could play we had to pull weeds, and at harvest time we carried our little buckets and made our way through the rows of the reaching, pickery, raspberry plants, plucking off plump maroon berries, and piling them in our buckets. My mom made jam and canned peaches and beans. She froze corn and berries. It was a busy time and I’ll be honest, I hated it. I hated weeding, I hated picking beans and raspberries, I just wanted to be out biking and roller skating down the street in front of our house. But what my parents knew and cared about, that I didn’t at the time, was that all that fresh fruit, all those delicious vegetables, had to be planted, then nurtured and watered, and then, of course, harvested so we could eat healthy, fresh, and self-sufficient. It was the law of the harvest at work. The tomorrow of healthy eating would start in the spring with the smallest of seeds and a plot of dirt.

             From small and simple things we would reap a bounty of gorgeous fruits and vegetables, overflowing with colors and goodness. All it took was the willingness to act – to plant the seed, and nurture – weed and water, and then the harvest was a hundredfold.  Such is the law in our lives.

             Today is a space you created with all your days that came before. The glorious and the ugly. If you’re sitting in a warm home surrounded by family and loved ones, it’s because you worked, you loved, you invested in yourself and others. If you’re loving yourself it’s because you plant thoughts and gentleness in your own heart and mind about who you are and what you do.  If you have friends it’s because you are a friend.

             The opposite is also true. If you live in lack, in any of these spaces, it is so because of the seeds planted within your mindset and actions, as well. If your relationships are anemic it’s because of the way you do not invest in them, and the people you allow into your life. If you struggle with an addiction it is most likely because you chose to get involved with an addictive substance. If you live in fear it is because you allow thoughts of fear rather than faith to dominate your mind. If you are in debt chances are it is due to choices you made to spend. Let’s hop on the responsibility train.

             Today I’m talking about “Tomorrow Begins Today” so that TODAY we begin creating for tomorrow – for all the tomorrows that will bear the fruit of the seeds planted]]>Episode 114

             Tomorrow Begins Today: Law of the Harvest

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. One of my favorite sayings is “Tomorrow Begins Today.”  I have the saying, torn from a magazine, stuck with one lone magnet to the front of my fridge. I look at it every day because it reminds me that what I am doing right now, in this moment, isn’t just about today, it’s about the law of the harvest. It’s about creating what I want in my life tomorrow, going forward. It’s about planting the seeds for the fruits I want to come forth. It’s about karma. It’s about active creation from a big picture perspective. It’s about planting and nurturing seeds in work, in relationships, in self-development, in learning. Tomorrow begins today and that means today is a powerful space to occupy.

              

             If you could harvest anything you wanted in your life, what would it be? It’s November, it’s harvest time. Thanksgiving is giving thanks for what we’ve harvested over the summer. Let’s think about this for a minute.

              

             When I was a child we lived in a small Idaho community and each summer my parents planted beans, potatoes, tomatoes, chard, onions, you name it.  We had a garden plot that ran down one whole side of our property and at the top of our alfalfa fields, we had another big garden- rows and rows of raspberry bushes. During the summer my dad would irrigate the garden, and my brothers and sister and I would splash in the water in our swimming suits as it flooded the lawn, but during the week, we’d pull weeds, every day. Before we could play we had to pull weeds, and at harvest time we carried our little buckets and made our way through the rows of the reaching, pickery, raspberry plants, plucking off plump maroon berries, and piling them in our buckets. My mom made jam and canned peaches and beans. She froze corn and berries. It was a busy time and I’ll be honest, I hated it. I hated weeding, I hated picking beans and raspberries, I just wanted to be out biking and roller skating down the street in front of our house. But what my parents knew and cared about, that I didn’t at the time, was that all that fresh fruit, all those delicious vegetables, had to be planted, then nurtured and watered, and then, of course, harvested so we could eat healthy, fresh, and self-sufficient. It was the law of the harvest at work. The tomorrow of healthy eating would start in the spring with the smallest of seeds and a plot of dirt.

             From small and simple things we would reap a bounty of gorgeous fruits and vegetables, overflowing with colors and goodness. All it took was the willingness to act – to plant the seed, and nurture – weed and water, and then the harvest was a hundredfold.  Such is the law in our lives.

             Today is a space you created with all your days that came before. The glorious and the ugly. If you’re sitting in a warm home surrounded by family and loved ones, it’s because you worked, you loved, you invested in yourself and others. If you’re loving yourself it’s because you plant thoughts and gentleness in your own heart and mind about who you are and what you do.  If you have friends it’s because you are a friend.

             The opposite is also true. If you live in lack, in any of these spaces, it is so because of the seeds planted within your mindset and actions, as well. If your relationships are anemic it’s because of the way you do not invest in them, and the people you allow into your life. If you struggle with an addiction it is most likely because you chose to get involved with an addictive substance. If you live in fear it is because you allow thoughts of fear rather than faith to dominate your mind. If you are in debt chances are it is due to choices you made to spend. Let’s hop on the responsibility train.

             Today I’m talking about “Tomorrow Begins Today” so that TODAY we begin creating for tomorrow – for all the tomorrows that will bear the fruit of the seeds planted today. And because it’s amazing how small seeds – a tiny, tiny, seed that is so small it may get lost in the palm of your hand, once it is planted and nurtured, will create such glorious and intricate flowers, or a sprawling plant from which abundant fruits or vegetables continue to develop. The concept of our ability to create such harvests by planting simple seeds is glorious and powerful and not to be missed.

             When I was 18 I started college. I packed up my car and drove to a college an hour or so away and moved into my first apartment. Two years later I finished my associate’s degree and with it moved to California to use that degree.

             One thing leads to the next. I invested in my education which allowed me to travel to a different state to accept a job where I then met people, created memories and created friendships I’ve had for 20 years. When I went back to school for my bachelor’s degree, that lead me not only to a more educated mind and a deeper understanding of things but to friends, to rock climbing (a class I took), to backpacking, to people who would shape the rest of my life. I met my future husband while at college and that, of course, led to my children.  My education gave me the credentials I needed to get my first jobs, the skills to write work worth being published, and the foundation for getting my master’s degree further down the road. My investment in my master’s degree allowed me to teach at the university, which had always been a dream. It allowed me to study something that I love, and it eventually was key in creating the Love Your Story podcast and the incredible people I’ve met on this particular journey.

             Of course, there are hundreds, even thousands of other things that were born from these choices, but the choice to seek education led me to knowledge, to people, to experiences, to purpose and to accomplishment. It brought forth abundantly.

             The law of the harvest is a universal law. What you plant will determine what you reap. If you plant weeds you will not get fruit and vegetables. If you plant trees you will not get cacti. If you plant flowers you will get bouquets.

             Choices, all of them, lead somewhere. What choices are you making right now and where are they leading?

             Put the podcast on pause and think about that question. Where are they really leading? Are those choices taking you where you want to go? Are you becoming who you want to be? Are you creating the relationships you want to create? Are you planting the seeds for the experiences you want to have? If you want to travel to Europe, are you planting the seeds to make that happen eventually? If you want a good relationship with someone, are you spending the time and effort to create it? If you want a promotion are you actually planting the appropriate seeds to get it? If you want to be good at something are you practicing? If you want to live with less fear are you becoming aware of the stories you tell yourself that create fear or self-doubt?

             As we discuss the harvest, we are focused on results, but I want to expand into the process as well. –You know, the journey.

             I was reading in Oprah’s book, What I Know For Sure, the other day and she talks about the line from LeeAnn Womack’s song that says, When you get the choice to sit out or dance, I hope you dance.

             She says, “What I know for sure is that every day brings a chance for you to draw in a breath, kick off your shoes, and step out and dance –to live free of regret and filled with as much joy, fun, and laughter as you can stand. You can either waltz boldly onto the stage of life and live the way you know your spirit is nudging you to, or you can sit quietly by the wall, receding into the shadows of fear and self-doubt. You have the choice this very moment – the only moment you have for certain – I hope you aren’t so wrapped up in nonessential stuff that you forget to really enjoy yourself, because this moment is about to be over. I hope you’ll look back and remember today as the day you decided to make every one count, to relish each hour as if there would never be another. And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance.”

             As I read that last week I decided to accept a couple of invitations that included travel. I struggled with the scheduling and taking too much time away from home, but as I thought about that line – when you have the choice to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance, I decided I was going to say yes to the dance. And I booked my trips and crossed out days on my calendar. As of the writing of this I have not make those trips yet, but on further reflection I know it was right to accept the dance. Sitting in my office doing things that feel important versus being out meeting people and creating connections and possibility,  the travel and the networking, the relationship building and the opportunities, these are going to plant seeds for more good fruit to come. There will be plenty of days to sit in my office doing important work on the computer.

             This idea of actively engaging with life is just one way of planting seeds for tomorrow’s harvest. There is also the active creation of making choices to live within your moral and ethical codes to create your character, as you wish it to be. Planting the seeds of honesty today creates peace and trust tomorrow. Service today creates connection, the feel-goods of lightening someone’s burden, love, good karma, friendship.  The seeds of living according to your belief system bears the fruits of self-respect.  The seeds of love beget the fruits of more love – love begets love.

             In high school, my oldest son dedicated himself to taking AP classes and getting good grades in school. He harvested good results on his AP exams and tested out of college-level classes. He harvested the fruits of scholarships.

             My mother invested her life in caring for her children and grandchildren and her harvest has been 6 children and 20 grandchildren who love her.

             I have attended a networking group faithfully and sought to help others forward their interests, the harvest for me is connection with some amazing ladies who also help and support my efforts with the Love Your Story podcast. They listen, they share, they buy t-shirts and make FB posts. Not to mention my opportunity to know them and bask in their goodness, energy, joy, and forward thinking.

             There are also ill planted seeds:

             I have seen friends and associates plant the following seeds –  Choosing to look at pornography and harvesting the fruits of addiction, twisted sexual expectation, a mindset of objectifying women, and much worse.

             I watched one friend lose his driver’s license, go to jail, and pay over 10K in court costs as his choices to drink and drive harvested him some rough years.

             I’ve seen the seeds of laziness and apathy harvest stagnation and a life stalled out. Lots of time lost.

             The seeds of self-loathing and condemnation have brought about the fruits of small and fearful lives when not tackled with serious efforts of breaking through that storm of darkness.  I have spoken with many people, as they sought to reframe their self-perceptions, who had lived small and afraid because they saw themselves as unworthy and so didn’t dare go for big things. Ben didn’t dare ask women out that he found attractive because he couldn’t bear the possible rejection he was certain he would get. So he lived lonely. He resorted to using pornography and living a small, fearful life, all because he was certain he was too nerdy to try and build a real life that included a real relationship. Karen was certain she was a bad mother because she did not love being home with little kids all the time. She knew how often she yelled and she constantly told herself she was not cut out for this. Her enjoyment of mothering curtailed by her self-loathing and certainty that everyone else was doing it so much better.  It was the inner critic that planted seeds of self-doubt and failure, and so she harvested a negative and depleting parenting experience.

             But, of course, those are not the type of seeds we want to plant or nurture. We want to pull out those weeds and allow for the purposeful placement of seeds that will bare joy and peace, goodness and abundance. Again, it’s all within our power. Decide the harvest you want. Identify the seeds you need to plant. Plant those babies and then nurture them every day. You’ll start to see the bud pop from the metaphorical dirt, then you’ll see the stalks grow stronger and fuller as you continue to nurture them. And before long you’ll start to see more fruit than you could have imagined. The fruits of our labors are often far broader than we expected.

             In the episode where I interviewed Heidi Totten, in October, the creator of 100 Humanitarians, we talked about how her original trip to Kenya, years ago, planted the seeds for a vision of greater impact that turned into a non-profit that she created that has provided underwear for the women in Kenya, as well as bringing gardening and other ways of supporting and making life better for the people of Kenya. It was a simple trip that turned into something that has made a tremendous difference in the lives of women of Kenya. Seeds planted, work done. Harvest happening. And the harvest is so rich!

             Let me mention another way of planting seeds – gratitude. In the book The Magic, by Rhonda Bryne, she talks about the way to create more abundance in your life – more health, more money, better relationships, the fruition of your dreams– you must first give gratitude. To receive you have to give. Her premise is that the magic formula for harvesting good things is to be grateful for what you already have.  You plant seeds of gratitude with the words Thank You, and you harvest more of the things you are grateful for. For example, since I have started doing the 28 days of gratitude suggested in her book, I have daily planted seeds of gratitude in my own heart and top-of-mind consciousness because each day I start out focusing on 10 things I’m grateful for and why I’m thankful for them. The WHY is interesting because it takes it to a deeper level and I get to evaluate what’s important to me on this deeper level. For example, today I was grateful for a big basket of grapes Valerie gave to me. When I looked at the “why” it was because it was abundance, and I love abundance. It was because it gave me a chance to create a fresh, healthy juice – and I love to eat and feel healthy. And, it was because it was a kindness and I appreciate the kindnesses of my friends. I was grateful because that one act was about abundance, health, and friendship.

             As I do this exercise continuously, I have harvested a clarity about how much I am supported and blessed by God. I have harvested an awareness of all the people who bring abundance, kindness and blessings to me daily. I have harvested a space of deep appreciation and peace because of the deep realization and top-of-mind awareness of the abundance that flows to me every single day.  The repetition is what has cemented this deep sense of understanding, and it’s a beautiful harvest all its own.

             So, I’ll end with a story shared by  Dieter F. Uchtdort of the LDS Church in a talk called God’s Harvest, 2014.

             A woman named Christa once worked for a small seed company. She loved her job. It was a source of immense wonder that each tiny seed she sold had the capacity to transform itself into something quite miraculous—a carrot, a cabbage, or even a mighty oak tree.

             Christa loved sitting at her computer taking orders and answering questions. But one day she received a complaint that puzzled her.

             “The seeds don’t work,” the customer said. “I bought them two months ago and still nothing.”

             “Did you plant them in good soil and give them enough water and sunlight?” Christa asked.

             “No, but I did my part,” the customer replied. “I bought the seeds. After all, they are guaranteed to grow.”

             “But you didn’t plant them?”

             “Heavens no. That would mean getting my hands dirty.”

             Christa thought about this and decided that planting guidelines would have to be written. She resolved what the first guideline would be: “You must follow planting instructions for the seeds to sprout. You can’t set them on the shelf and expect them to grow.”

             It wasn’t long before another complaint puzzled her.

             “The seeds aren’t producing,” a customer claimed.

             “Did you plant them in good soil?” Christa responded. “Did you give them the appropriate amount of water and sunlight?”

             “Oh, yes,” the customer insisted. “I did all that―exactly as it says on the package. But they don’t work.”

             “Did anything happen at all? Did they sprout?”

             “Nothing happened,” the customer said. “I planted them just as directed. I was hoping to have tomatoes for dinner. Now I am very disappointed.”

             “Wait,” Christa replied. “Are you saying you planted the seeds today?”

             “Don’t be ridiculous,” the customer replied. “I planted them a week ago. I was not expecting to see tomatoes on the first day; I was patient. Let me tell you, there has been a lot of watering and waiting between then and now.”

             Christa knew she would have to add another guideline: “These seeds conform to the laws of biology. If you plant the seeds in the morning and expect to eat tomatoes later that week, you will be disappointed. You must be patient and wait for the work of nature to unfold before you.”

             All went well until Christa received another complaint.

             “I’m very disappointed in your seeds,” the customer began. “I planted them just as the package recommended. I gave them water, made sure they had sunshine, and waited until finally they produced their harvest.”

             “Sounds like you did everything right,” Christa said.

             “That’s all very fine,” the customer replied. “But what I got was zucchini!”

             “My records show that those were the seeds you ordered,” Christa said.

             “But I don’t want zucchini; I want pumpkins!”

             “I’m not following.”

             “I planted the seeds in my pumpkin patch—the very same soil that produced pumpkins last year. I praised the plants every day, telling them what beautiful pumpkins they would become. But instead of large, round, orange pumpkins, I got long, green zucchini. Tons of them!”

             Christa knew then that guidelines might not be enough and that it was necessary to state a principle: “The seed you plant and the time of the planting determine the harvest.”

             May you actively decide on what you want to harvest, and then plant the right seeds. May you want the harvest bad enough that daily you will water, weed, and pay some attention to the seed. And, may you garner a harvest that exceeds your expectations – something wonderful, colorful, peaceful, joyful, filled with love and any other thing you hope to create!

             Tomorrow begins today, and that’s a powerful place to be.

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4035Wed, 21 Nov 2018 09:00:40 -070024:29falsefullWelcome to the Love Your Story podcast. One of my favorite sayings is “Tomorrow Begins Today.”  I have the saying, torn from a magazine, stuck with one lone magnet to the front of my fridge. I look at it every day because it reminds me that what I am doing right now, in this moment, isn’t just about today, it’s about the law of the harvest. It’s about creating what I want in my life tomorrow, going forward. It’s about planting the seeds for the fruits I want to come forth. It’s about karma. It’s about active creation from a big picture perspective. It’s about planting and nurturing seeds in work, in relationships, in self-development, in learning. Tomorrow begins today and that means today is a powerful space to occupy.Lori Lee113 Remembering Kylee Bruce: Tips on dealing with Loss and Grief113 Remembering Kylee Bruce: Tips on dealing with Loss and Grief

             Welcome to another episode of the Love Your Story podcast, where I get to delve into people’s amazing stories to learn from their experiences and share that with you. Today I have two guests with me – this is a new approach for Love Your Story, but this story, the death of Kylee Bruce is one of surviving and thriving for those she left behind, and the two people who loved and lost in this story are Kylee’s mother Gaylene and her fiancée, Brandon Forseth. Together they will tell the story of her tragic loss and the ways they have found to survive.

              

             Joining me today are Gaylene and Brandon from Oregon.

              

             When Gaylene was young her father shot her mother and then committed suicide. From a young age, Gaylene had the opportunity to figure out how to process loss, but she says that one of the things that is most important about her story is the way she has learned, from others, how to do this and that it CAN be done. Her life has included the loss of her parents, a marriage through divorce and then the loss of her daughter Kylee when she was killed in an automobile accident, and her process of seeking for tools and processing pain has been an important part of her journey.

             When Kylee died in a car accident in December of 2016, she was carrying Brandon, her fiancee’s child.

             Brandon said, “I’m not an expert on love, I was just really good at loving Kylee. My story is one of true love, grief, and how I found a way to keep my Kylee’s legacy alive. I haven’t yet been able to “overcome” grief completely, and I doubt I ever will but I have found a way to keep waking up every morning with purpose.”  So, today we’re going to talk about Kylee’s story and how to process grief. How to survive and thrive despite loss.

              

             Tune into the audio program for my interview with Gaylene and Brandon.

             You can find them on the Facebook Group: #lovehardproject

              

             Washington Irving said, “There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are the messengers of overwhelming grief, of deep contrition, and of unspeakable love.”

             The pains of loss can leave us stripped of hope, of a desire to go on, and rack us with the worst pains we can experience in this life. But as we’ve discussed today, there is a way to survive. There is a tomorrow and even though you perhaps can’t see it in the dark places, others have gone before you and found the way. Follow in their footsteps, even if you are crawling. One step at a time allow for grieving and loving and celebrating those beautiful souls you have walked with.

             Thanks for being with us today for Kylee’s story and for Gaylene and Brandon’s stories and journey’s through grief. Your challenge this week is to love hard on the people who are important to you. We don’t ever know when loss will knock on our door, so today, in this moment, right now, love with all your heart. No regrets.

             Share this episode with someone who could use it and check out the Love Your Story podcast website for all the past episodes, classes and life story challenges

             ]]>113 Remembering Kylee Bruce: Tips on dealing with Loss and Grief

             Welcome to another episode of the Love Your Story podcast, where I get to delve into people’s amazing stories to learn from their experiences and share that with you. Today I have two guests with me – this is a new approach for Love Your Story, but this story, the death of Kylee Bruce is one of surviving and thriving for those she left behind, and the two people who loved and lost in this story are Kylee’s mother Gaylene and her fiancée, Brandon Forseth. Together they will tell the story of her tragic loss and the ways they have found to survive.

              

             Joining me today are Gaylene and Brandon from Oregon.

              

             When Gaylene was young her father shot her mother and then committed suicide. From a young age, Gaylene had the opportunity to figure out how to process loss, but she says that one of the things that is most important about her story is the way she has learned, from others, how to do this and that it CAN be done. Her life has included the loss of her parents, a marriage through divorce and then the loss of her daughter Kylee when she was killed in an automobile accident, and her process of seeking for tools and processing pain has been an important part of her journey.

             When Kylee died in a car accident in December of 2016, she was carrying Brandon, her fiancee’s child.

             Brandon said, “I’m not an expert on love, I was just really good at loving Kylee. My story is one of true love, grief, and how I found a way to keep my Kylee’s legacy alive. I haven’t yet been able to “overcome” grief completely, and I doubt I ever will but I have found a way to keep waking up every morning with purpose.”  So, today we’re going to talk about Kylee’s story and how to process grief. How to survive and thrive despite loss.

              

             Tune into the audio program for my interview with Gaylene and Brandon.

             You can find them on the Facebook Group: #lovehardproject

              

             Washington Irving said, “There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are the messengers of overwhelming grief, of deep contrition, and of unspeakable love.”

             The pains of loss can leave us stripped of hope, of a desire to go on, and rack us with the worst pains we can experience in this life. But as we’ve discussed today, there is a way to survive. There is a tomorrow and even though you perhaps can’t see it in the dark places, others have gone before you and found the way. Follow in their footsteps, even if you are crawling. One step at a time allow for grieving and loving and celebrating those beautiful souls you have walked with.

             Thanks for being with us today for Kylee’s story and for Gaylene and Brandon’s stories and journey’s through grief. Your challenge this week is to love hard on the people who are important to you. We don’t ever know when loss will knock on our door, so today, in this moment, right now, love with all your heart. No regrets.

             Share this episode with someone who could use it and check out the Love Your Story podcast website for all the past episodes, classes and life story challenges

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4031Wed, 14 Nov 2018 09:00:08 -070050:24falsefullKylee Bruce was killed in a car wreck. She was carrying her boyfriend's child and as he came upon the scene to inquire about who was involved in the wreck, the police surrounded him as they discovered who he was looking for. They knew she had been killed and they didn't want him to get hurt there on the busy highway. Today I interview Kylees mother and her boyfriend Brandon. We get the whole story and we also talk about dealing with loss and grief.Lori LeeEpisode 112 Death by Prescription: The Opioid CrisisEpisode 112 Death by Prescription: The Opioid Crisis

             In 2009 Darlene Schultz’s 18-year-old son went to his doctor to get something for the pain for his degenerative back disease. He had just gotten a job at Home Depot and needed to control his pain so he could work. He came home with oxi-cotton. After 4 years of trying to beat the addiction, going through jail time and immense struggles, in 2013 this same young man overdosed in his parent’s bed and despite all work by paramedics he did not recover.

             This mom, along with many others, has felt the shame associated with addiction, the horrible loss of a child and the travail of watching them walk the road of self-loathing and a struggle against a substance that controls their lives.

             Stay tuned today for stories from moms who have lost children, for comments from Utah’s Attorney General, Sean Reyes; thoughts from John Huber, the U.S. Attorney for the District of Utah, and his take on prosecuting drug offenders, and thoughts by Brian Besser, the agent in charge of the Drug Enforcement Administration of Utah and the Metro Narcotics Task Force. I also get some interview time with Dr. Jennifer Plumb, a medical professional and tireless fighter in the opioid crisis.

              

             In 2017 49,068 Americans died from opioid-related overdoses. 115 Americans die from opioids every day. From 2010-2016 heroin-related overdose deaths have increased by 500%. And, more than 80% of heroin users started their cycle of addiction with prescription opioids.  In October of 2018 the Utah Solutions Summit took place. This was a coming together of law enforcement, doctors, parents, students, recovery groups and many others for an open conversation of stemming the tide of opioid addiction and death. These interviews and stories were collected from this summit to give you, the listener, a well-rounded look at the opioid stories and things being done in our communities – in this case, specifically the state of Utah, who has made tremendous progress because of the willingness of all these parties to work together. Have you wondered about the opioid crisis and the billboards you see along the freeway telling you to get aware? Today’s episode will give you some insight. Some of these comments are coming from panel discussions, some from interviews. You may hear some background noise, but here we go.

              

             Tune into the audio program for stories, interviews, and discussion.

              

             Support Groups for those dealing with addiction or supporting addicts include:

             USARA – Utah Support Advocates for Recovery Awareness

             180 E. 2100 S. Suite 100 Salt Lake City, UT 84115; 801.599.1667

             Overdose Awareness Utah

             1021 N. 540 W. American Fork, UT 84003; 801.234.9963; FB: Overdose Awareness Utah

              

             Utah stands as an example as a state who has excellent collaboration between families, politicians, law enforcement and medical professionals who care and are banding together to take on this crisis of addiction that so often begins with prescription pills. Our death toll has decreased this year, due to these efforts, and all are hoping to keep up this trend. If you or someone you love is caught in this crisis, I will have the recommended organizations and contact information in the show notes on the website at www.loveyourstorypodcast.com, and I thank the moms who were willing to share their stories, hearts and advice on the show today. Thanks for being here today, and if you liked the show, please leave a review on iTunes/Apple podcasts or wherever you listen. See you next week on the LYS podcast.

             ]]>Episode 112 Death by Prescription: The Opioid Crisis

             In 2009 Darlene Schultz’s 18-year-old son went to his doctor to get something for the pain for his degenerative back disease. He had just gotten a job at Home Depot and needed to control his pain so he could work. He came home with oxi-cotton. After 4 years of trying to beat the addiction, going through jail time and immense struggles, in 2013 this same young man overdosed in his parent’s bed and despite all work by paramedics he did not recover.

             This mom, along with many others, has felt the shame associated with addiction, the horrible loss of a child and the travail of watching them walk the road of self-loathing and a struggle against a substance that controls their lives.

             Stay tuned today for stories from moms who have lost children, for comments from Utah’s Attorney General, Sean Reyes; thoughts from John Huber, the U.S. Attorney for the District of Utah, and his take on prosecuting drug offenders, and thoughts by Brian Besser, the agent in charge of the Drug Enforcement Administration of Utah and the Metro Narcotics Task Force. I also get some interview time with Dr. Jennifer Plumb, a medical professional and tireless fighter in the opioid crisis.

              

             In 2017 49,068 Americans died from opioid-related overdoses. 115 Americans die from opioids every day. From 2010-2016 heroin-related overdose deaths have increased by 500%. And, more than 80% of heroin users started their cycle of addiction with prescription opioids.  In October of 2018 the Utah Solutions Summit took place. This was a coming together of law enforcement, doctors, parents, students, recovery groups and many others for an open conversation of stemming the tide of opioid addiction and death. These interviews and stories were collected from this summit to give you, the listener, a well-rounded look at the opioid stories and things being done in our communities – in this case, specifically the state of Utah, who has made tremendous progress because of the willingness of all these parties to work together. Have you wondered about the opioid crisis and the billboards you see along the freeway telling you to get aware? Today’s episode will give you some insight. Some of these comments are coming from panel discussions, some from interviews. You may hear some background noise, but here we go.

              

             Tune into the audio program for stories, interviews, and discussion.

              

             Support Groups for those dealing with addiction or supporting addicts include:

             USARA – Utah Support Advocates for Recovery Awareness

             180 E. 2100 S. Suite 100 Salt Lake City, UT 84115; 801.599.1667

             Overdose Awareness Utah

             1021 N. 540 W. American Fork, UT 84003; 801.234.9963; FB: Overdose Awareness Utah

              

             Utah stands as an example as a state who has excellent collaboration between families, politicians, law enforcement and medical professionals who care and are banding together to take on this crisis of addiction that so often begins with prescription pills. Our death toll has decreased this year, due to these efforts, and all are hoping to keep up this trend. If you or someone you love is caught in this crisis, I will have the recommended organizations and contact information in the show notes on the website at www.loveyourstorypodcast.com, and I thank the moms who were willing to share their stories, hearts and advice on the show today. Thanks for being here today, and if you liked the show, please leave a review on iTunes/Apple podcasts or wherever you listen. See you next week on the LYS podcast.

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4026Wed, 07 Nov 2018 09:00:27 -070001:00:58falsefullIn 2009 Darlene Schultz’s 18-year-old son went to his doctor to get something for the pain for his degenerative back disease. He had just gotten a job at Home Depot and needed to control his pain so he could work. He came home with oxi-cotton. After 4 years of trying to beat the addiction, going through jail time and immense struggles, in 2013 this same young man overdosed in his parent’s bed and despite all work by paramedics he did not recover.  This mom, along with many others, has felt the shame associated with addiction, the horrible loss of a child and the travail of watching them walk the road of self-loathing and a struggle against a substance that controls their lives. Stay tuned today for stories from moms who have lost children, for comments from Utah’s Attorney General, Sean Reyes; thoughts from John Huber, the U.S. Attorney for the District of Utah, and his take on prosecuting drug offenders, and thoughts by Brian Besser, the agent in charge of the Drug Enforcement Administration of Utah and the Metro Narcotics Task Force. I also get some interview time with Dr. Jennifer Plumb, a medical professional and tireless fighter in the opioid crisis.  Lori LeeEpisode 111 ZombiesEpisode 111 Zombies

             Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast. Today is Halloween and so it’s appropriate I bring to you a story steeped in the bizarre and spooky. Today we speak of zombies. Not in theory, but it reality. Join me for a trip to Haiti and a dive into voodoo, magic, and the bizarre reality of real life (the word is used lightly) zombies.

             In February of 1974, Wade Davis, the future Harvard Scientist who would journey into the secret societies of Haitian Voodoo, zombies and magic, had his first meeting with the man who would send him on this quest to discover the plants used in creating the drugs that turned people into Zombies.

             Today’s podcast includes part of Wade’s story from his book The Serpent and the Rainbow and his astonishing journey into the secret societies of Haitian voodoo, as well as an interview with Lynne McNeill, Associate Folklore professor at Utah State University,  who went to Haiti with a film crew to delve into the Zombie stories, and the experiences she had there is past year.  Happy Halloween, you won’t want to miss this bizarre look into the realm of zombies, possession, and first-hand experiences and discussions Lynne had with priest and priestess of the Voodoo religion.

              

             Let’s jump right into Wade Davis’s story that starts in 1974….At this point in his life, he was just a student, anxious and restless to explore. The Amazon was his first choice and so he approached the venerable professor Richard Evans Schultes in the Department of Anthropology for his advice. As he slipped onto the 4^th floor of Harvard’s Botanical Museum and the office of Professor Schultes, he was met with herbarium cases and photos of professor Schultes in exotic locales. The advice Schultes gave was sparse, so without plans and just enough money to support himself for a year, Davis headed to Colombia. Schultes turned out to be a catalyst of adventure, but Davis was on his own to find his way. This student of anthropology embarked onto what would be only his first adventure in exotic places where his life was often at risk due to jungles and rainforests, foreign and wild cultures, lack of supplies and uncharted territory as he sought to collect plants. He had advised himself before embarking on this journey to “risk discomfort and solitude for understanding.”  This first expedition became but an episode in an ethnobotanical apprenticeship that took him throughout much of western South American. He earned his degree in anthropology in 1977. Following a two-year hiatus from the tropics, Davis returned to Harvard as one of Professor Schultes’s graduate students. Ethnobotany meant searching for plants with medicinal properties, and collecting the plants was only part of the exploration. Learning from the Indians and natives of the areas they explored were key to understanding how the plants were used.  Schultes had spent 13 years in the Amazon because he believed that the Indian knowledge of medicinal plants could offer vital new drugs for the entire world. He identified over 1800 plants of medical potential in the northwest Amazon alone and he knew that thousands more remained. These were the plants he sent his students out to find.

             Late on a Monday afternoon early in 1982 Schultes’s secretary called Davis and asked him to come into the office. “I’ve got something for you,” Schultes said. “It could be intriguing.” He handed him the New York address of Dr. Nathan Kline, psychiatrist, and pioneer in the field of psychopharmacology – the study of the actions of drugs on the mind. Kline was not a small player in the field of mental disorders and chemical imbalances rectified by drugs. His research lowered the number of patients at American psychiatric institutions from over half a million in the 50’s to 120,000 in the 80’s. He was no small player and this was not a trip to be taken lightly.

             It turned out that Davis was being sent to the...]]>Episode 111 Zombies

             Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast. Today is Halloween and so it’s appropriate I bring to you a story steeped in the bizarre and spooky. Today we speak of zombies. Not in theory, but it reality. Join me for a trip to Haiti and a dive into voodoo, magic, and the bizarre reality of real life (the word is used lightly) zombies.

             In February of 1974, Wade Davis, the future Harvard Scientist who would journey into the secret societies of Haitian Voodoo, zombies and magic, had his first meeting with the man who would send him on this quest to discover the plants used in creating the drugs that turned people into Zombies.

             Today’s podcast includes part of Wade’s story from his book The Serpent and the Rainbow and his astonishing journey into the secret societies of Haitian voodoo, as well as an interview with Lynne McNeill, Associate Folklore professor at Utah State University,  who went to Haiti with a film crew to delve into the Zombie stories, and the experiences she had there is past year.  Happy Halloween, you won’t want to miss this bizarre look into the realm of zombies, possession, and first-hand experiences and discussions Lynne had with priest and priestess of the Voodoo religion.

              

             Let’s jump right into Wade Davis’s story that starts in 1974….At this point in his life, he was just a student, anxious and restless to explore. The Amazon was his first choice and so he approached the venerable professor Richard Evans Schultes in the Department of Anthropology for his advice. As he slipped onto the 4^th floor of Harvard’s Botanical Museum and the office of Professor Schultes, he was met with herbarium cases and photos of professor Schultes in exotic locales. The advice Schultes gave was sparse, so without plans and just enough money to support himself for a year, Davis headed to Colombia. Schultes turned out to be a catalyst of adventure, but Davis was on his own to find his way. This student of anthropology embarked onto what would be only his first adventure in exotic places where his life was often at risk due to jungles and rainforests, foreign and wild cultures, lack of supplies and uncharted territory as he sought to collect plants. He had advised himself before embarking on this journey to “risk discomfort and solitude for understanding.”  This first expedition became but an episode in an ethnobotanical apprenticeship that took him throughout much of western South American. He earned his degree in anthropology in 1977. Following a two-year hiatus from the tropics, Davis returned to Harvard as one of Professor Schultes’s graduate students. Ethnobotany meant searching for plants with medicinal properties, and collecting the plants was only part of the exploration. Learning from the Indians and natives of the areas they explored were key to understanding how the plants were used.  Schultes had spent 13 years in the Amazon because he believed that the Indian knowledge of medicinal plants could offer vital new drugs for the entire world. He identified over 1800 plants of medical potential in the northwest Amazon alone and he knew that thousands more remained. These were the plants he sent his students out to find.

             Late on a Monday afternoon early in 1982 Schultes’s secretary called Davis and asked him to come into the office. “I’ve got something for you,” Schultes said. “It could be intriguing.” He handed him the New York address of Dr. Nathan Kline, psychiatrist, and pioneer in the field of psychopharmacology – the study of the actions of drugs on the mind. Kline was not a small player in the field of mental disorders and chemical imbalances rectified by drugs. His research lowered the number of patients at American psychiatric institutions from over half a million in the 50’s to 120,000 in the 80’s. He was no small player and this was not a trip to be taken lightly.

             It turned out that Davis was being sent to the Caribbean. Haiti. The “Frontier of Death” was the next mystery to be unraveled. As he met with Kline and Professor Lehman it was presented this way, “ We hear you are attracted to unusual places. If what we are about to tell you is true, as we believe it is, it means that there are men and women dwelling in the continuous present, where the past is dead and the future consists of fear and impossible desires.”  He spoke of zombies.

             “The first problem,” said Lehman, “is to know when the dead are truly dead.”  After this topic was discussed at length Lehman concluded that there were only two means of ascertaining death and the first was not infallible – it involved a brain scan and cardiogram. The second was putrefaction, which required time. Kline pulled out a death certificate for Clairvius Narcisse, dated 1962. “Our problem,” Kline explained, “is that this Narcisse is now very much alive and resettled in his village in Artibonite Valley in central Haiti. He and his family claim he was the victim of a voodoo cult and that immediately following his burial he was taken from the grave as a zombie.”

             “Yes,” he said, “the living dead.” Voodooists believe that their sorcerers have the power to raise innocent individuals from their graves to sell them as slaves. Some families will kill the dead a second time to prevent this fate from happening to family members.  The Narcisse case was not the first to come to light, but one that was most public.

             The two explained that since 1961 they had been systematically investigating all accounts of zombification.  The latest was a woman, Natagette Joseph, aged about sixty, who was supposedly killed in 1966. In 1980 she was recognized by a police officer as she wandered around her home village.

             But, back to Clairvius Narcisse – In the spring of 1962, a Haitian peasant aged about 40 approached an emergency entrance of the hospital where he was admitted under the name Clairvius Narcisse complaining of fever, body aches, and general malaise. He had also begun to spit blood. He was pronounced dead a few hours later by two attendant physicians, one of them American. The body was identified and placed in cold storage for 20 hours and then taken for burial. In 1980, 18 years after, he returned, claimed he had been made a zombie by his brother because of a land dispute when he refused to sell off his inheritance. Immediately following his resurrection from the grave he was beaten, bound and led away by a team of men to the north country where he worked as a slave with other zombies. Eventually, the zombie master was killed and whatever force kept them bound to him, dispersed. It was then that Narcisse returned to his village.

             After a clinical discussion by Kline and Lehman about the reduced metabolic rate, dying brain cells, and the likelihood of a hoax, Kline noted that the precise definition of a zombie was a body without character and without will. They explained to Davis that they felt it was a drug that allowed the dead to be resurrected. A zombie poison. They wanted to know what drug it was that could lower the metabolic rate of a victim to such a level that they would be considered dead but in fact be alive. Think of the difference this could make in surgeries!

             “What we want from you is the formula of the poison,” Lehman said to Davis. They gave him a few contact names, a small fund that had been put aside, and sent him to find the voodoo sorcerers responsible and to obtain samples of the poison and antidote, with as much observation as possible.

             Mind awhirl with questions, foreboding, and ideas, the phrase “The frontier of death” was the phrase that haunted Davis most of all. What lay ahead?

             The mystery of Haiti existed in the very air as he arrived. The thump of the city, the flow of the people, there was something electric in the air – a raw elemental energy.  Port-au-Prince lies prostrate across a low, hot tropical plain at the head of a bay flanked on both sides by soaring mountains. Haiti’s multitude  – 6 million people – sat on only 10 thousand square miles and they harbored a history of slavery, revolt, and farming.

             Davis met his contact and before long found himself experienced the rites of Rada– Voodoun possession. The spirits arrived and mounted the bodies they would possess and the drums and the dancing and fire eating left him in ah.  His contact introduced him to the man he would offer to buy the poison from, and after a charade of grocery lists of ingredients, collecting and creating he walked away with a fraudulent product. As he searched for the plants himself, those he suspected to be ingredients, he found that they were difficult to find.  At one point Davis meets up with Lamarque Douyon, Haiti’s leading psychiatrist and the director of its only psychiatric institute. Douyon’s scientific interest in the zombie phenomenon dates to a series of experiments he conducted in the late 1950’s while completing his psychiatric residency at McGill University. What he observed during the experiments reminded him of the stories he’d heard when he was younger about accounts of zombies. He recalled as well the prevalent belief among Haitians that zombies were created by a poison that brought on a semblance of death from which the victim would eventually recover. By the time he returned to take his position in Haiti he was convinced the poison existed.

             In the meeting with Douyon he was passed a document, Article 249 of the Haitian penal code, that referred specifically to zombie poison and prohibiting the use of any substance that could induce a lethargic coma indistinguishable from death. The Haitian government recognized the existence of the poison.

             Douyon also introduced him to Clairvius Narcisse, the man who had recovered from his zombification. When he shared his account he showed a scar he bore on his right cheek, just to the edge of his mouth where a nail was driven through his coffin. He recalled remaining conscious throughout this ordeal and though completely immobilized he heard is sister crying, he remembered the doctor pronouncing him dead, the arrival of the Bokor and his assistants, drums pounding, the bokor singing. They beat him with a whip, tied him with a rope and wrapped his body in black cloth. Bound and gagged he was led away on foot by two men. He was passed from party to party along the road traveling by night and hiding by day until they reached a sugar plantation in which he would be put to work.

             In his book, The Serpent and the Rainbow, Wade Davis shares his discoveries and adventures in this Haitian realm of Voodoo, and today I’m adding in a modern voice. My interview with Lynne McNeill, assistant professor of folklore at Utah State University and her first-hand experiences in Haiti with a film crew in search of rites, rituals, zombies, possession, and Voodoun culture just this past year.  Here’s our interview.

              

             For the interview with Lynne McNeill that picks up and shares her story in Haiti, tune in to the audio program.

              

             By the end of the book, The Serpent and the Rainbow, Wade Davis has crossed far beyond simply finding plants and poisons. Oh, yes, a poison had been found and identified, but now he found himself swept into a worldview, a cultural view that was far beyond his as a Western Scientist. Straddling the cultural understandings,  his research here in Haiti suggested that there was a logical purpose for zombification consistent with the heritage of the people and culture here. Invited into inner realms for which there would be no return things looked very different than they did through his skeptical eyes upon landing in Haiti.

             He said, “To be sure, I had failed to document a zombie as it was taken from the cemetery, but this was no longer something I deliberately sought out. In the last weeks, I had in fact, been offered two promising opportunities to do so, provided, of course, that the cash payment to the bokor be sufficient. I had gone as far as making the preliminary contacts before I realized that the whole concept had changed. A year or two before I would have gone ahead, emboldened by the deep skepticism I had brought with me to Haiti; now that I had completely overcome my doubts, I found myself forced by that very certainty to turn aside an opportunity that might have offered final proof to those who still share my early skepticism.”   The money that the party in question demanded was considerable. Ethically he could never be sure that his payment might not have been responsible for the victim’s fate, and that was an ethical  Rubicon he was not willing to cross. So he did not pay to see the zombie rise.  But like Lynne, he records seeing first hand the ritual possessions. The young man moving like a reptile past the legs of naked women coated in clay. The sacrificial bull, for animal sacrifices are key in the rituals to the spirits they allow to ride their own live bodies. The machete cuts the throat of the bull and Davis finishes the book, “I turned to a man pressed close beside me and saw his arm, riddled with needles and small blades, and the blood running copiously over the scars of past years, staining some leaves bound to his elbow before dripping from his skin to mine. The man was smiling. He too was possessed, like the youth straddling the dying bull, or the dancers and the women wallowing in the mud.”

             As folklorists, we observe, with as little bias as possible, the rituals and ways of folk groups and cultures. We are there to record not to pass judgment; to learn and try to understand as best we can from an emic or outside perspective. Sometimes we tell their stories, when appropriate, but most often we tell our stories of observation. Zombies have been a rampant part of popular culture in the United States;  influenced by media portrayals. Chances are your impressions of a zombie are contrived from media portrayals, but here today we tell stories of a long-held religion brought from Africa on the slave ships and clung to as a form of worship that helped the slaves of Haiti retain their cultural ties despite their removal from their country of origin. If you thought zombies were just another made up monster, maybe now you have more pieces of the truth; more background behind the stories.

             Happy Halloween. May you fight past all forms of zombification in your life, no matter where you are, no matter what you believe.  Create your story on purpose, with your own will, conviction, and agency. May death find you alive. Truly alive.

              

              

              

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4020Wed, 31 Oct 2018 09:00:54 -070054:41falsefullToday is Halloween and so it’s appropriate I bring to you a story steeped in the bizarre and spooky. Today we speak of zombies. Not in theory, but it reality. Join me for a trip to Haiti and a dive into voodoo, magic, and the bizarre reality of real life (the word is used lightly) zombies. No really, this is going to make your halloween.Lori LeeEpisode 110 The Art of Allowing – Interview with Jamie LernerEpisode 110 The Art of Allowing – Interview with Jamie Lerner

             Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast. Have you ever been in a position where you felt judged? Where you wished people would just allow you to live the life you wanted and that they’d live their life without imposing their expectations on you?

             Have you ever been on the other side of that coin?

             In this life we have agency and responsibility to create whatever beautiful storyline we deem best for us, but so often we feel we need to direct someone else’s direction, or we receive resistance from others who want us to move in different ways than we deem right for us.

             Today we are talking about the Art of Allowing. In my interview today with Jamie Lerner, co-author of the book The Ever-Loving Essence of You, and a past well-being-therapist, we will be discussing the joys and freedom to move about the world without having judgment about what anyone else is saying or doing.

             She believes that everyone is allowed to choose what is best for themselves and when we tend to what is best for our own selves and have clarity for ourselves, we care not what others have chosen for themselves. The entire point of allowing is to feel good as we flow from one loving moment to the next creating unconditional relationships along the way.

             I invited Jamie Lerner on the show today because she has a couple areas of expertise that I feel are key to creating our best life story. The first is that I want her to share her thoughts and insights on the Art of Allowing.

             The second, and reason she originally caught my attention is that as she works with her clients one of her favorite questions to ask is “Is your storyline working well for you?” she believes that the story we are incessantly telling is directly reflected in the life that we are living and if you change your story you will change your life. You know this is a space we live in here on the Love Your Story podcast, so I’m excited to hear her thoughts today.

              

             For our interview tune into the audio podcast.

              

             For more information on Jamie:

             http://www.jamie-lerner.com/

             Instagram: Jamie_lerner

             twitter.com/eleoy

             Her book: The Ever Loving Essence of You

             ]]>Episode 110 The Art of Allowing – Interview with Jamie Lerner

             Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast. Have you ever been in a position where you felt judged? Where you wished people would just allow you to live the life you wanted and that they’d live their life without imposing their expectations on you?

             Have you ever been on the other side of that coin?

             In this life we have agency and responsibility to create whatever beautiful storyline we deem best for us, but so often we feel we need to direct someone else’s direction, or we receive resistance from others who want us to move in different ways than we deem right for us.

             Today we are talking about the Art of Allowing. In my interview today with Jamie Lerner, co-author of the book The Ever-Loving Essence of You, and a past well-being-therapist, we will be discussing the joys and freedom to move about the world without having judgment about what anyone else is saying or doing.

             She believes that everyone is allowed to choose what is best for themselves and when we tend to what is best for our own selves and have clarity for ourselves, we care not what others have chosen for themselves. The entire point of allowing is to feel good as we flow from one loving moment to the next creating unconditional relationships along the way.

             I invited Jamie Lerner on the show today because she has a couple areas of expertise that I feel are key to creating our best life story. The first is that I want her to share her thoughts and insights on the Art of Allowing.

             The second, and reason she originally caught my attention is that as she works with her clients one of her favorite questions to ask is “Is your storyline working well for you?” she believes that the story we are incessantly telling is directly reflected in the life that we are living and if you change your story you will change your life. You know this is a space we live in here on the Love Your Story podcast, so I’m excited to hear her thoughts today.

              

             For our interview tune into the audio podcast.

              

             For more information on Jamie:

             http://www.jamie-lerner.com/

             Instagram: Jamie_lerner

             twitter.com/eleoy

             Her book: The Ever Loving Essence of You

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4013Wed, 24 Oct 2018 09:00:18 -070043:32falsefullToday we are talking about the Art of Allowing. In my interview today with Jamie Lerner, co-author of the book The Ever-Loving Essence of You, and a past well-being-therapist, we will be discussing the joys and freedom to move about the world without having judgment about what anyone else is saying or doing.Lori LeeEpisode 109 An Inside Look at Suicide-Interview Megan BorquinEpisode 109 An Inside Look at Suicide: Interview Megan Borquin

              

             Welcome to the Love Your Story Podcast. Today we get real with Megan Bourquin, a 21-year-old woman who attempted suicide, and her open, authentic discussion about why, mindset, her life experiences and some thoughts on how we can help stem the tide of suicide in America.

              

             Megan was born and raised in Michigan. Her upbringing was far from typical. She grew up with a father in prison and a family with enough trauma to last a lifetime. She battled with anxiety, depression, and PTSD. When she was 16 she started self-harming, self-medicating, and actively trying to take her own life. After a few failed suicide attempts she landed in extensive and long-term treatment facilities that ultimately saved her life.

              

             Tune into the audio program for our discussion.

              

             To follow Megan –

             Instagram: lovemeganbourquin

             ]]>Episode 109 An Inside Look at Suicide: Interview Megan Borquin

              

             Welcome to the Love Your Story Podcast. Today we get real with Megan Bourquin, a 21-year-old woman who attempted suicide, and her open, authentic discussion about why, mindset, her life experiences and some thoughts on how we can help stem the tide of suicide in America.

              

             Megan was born and raised in Michigan. Her upbringing was far from typical. She grew up with a father in prison and a family with enough trauma to last a lifetime. She battled with anxiety, depression, and PTSD. When she was 16 she started self-harming, self-medicating, and actively trying to take her own life. After a few failed suicide attempts she landed in extensive and long-term treatment facilities that ultimately saved her life.

              

             Tune into the audio program for our discussion.

              

             To follow Megan –

             Instagram: lovemeganbourquin

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=4006Wed, 17 Oct 2018 09:00:52 -070052:04falsefullMegan was born and raised in Michigan. Her upbringing was far from typical. She grew up with a father in prison and a family with enough trauma to last a lifetime. She battled with anxiety, depression, and PTSD. When she was 16 she started self-harming, self-medicating, and actively trying to take her own life. After a few failed suicide attempts she landed in extensive and long-term treatment facilities that ultimately saved her life. Tune in for this interview into her story and some thoughts on how to help combat the tidal wave of suicides in America.Lori LeeEpisode 108 Interview Jodi Orgill Brown: The Sun Still Shines – Surviving a brain tumor108 Interview Jodi Orgill Brown: The Sun Still Shines –

             Surviving a brain tumor

              

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today’s story is about a woman’s heartbreaking beautiful journey. At first blush, it’s hard to see how someone could reframe a non-operable brain tumor wrapped around the brain stem, the paralysis of the right side of her face, and on-going headaches, pain, and pressure as holding any beauty, but today we’ll find out how Jodi Orgill Brown does just that. Stay tuned for our discussion.

             Jodi Orgill Brown is a certified nonprofit consultant, as well as a professional speaker, a best-selling author, and a brain tumor survivor. Jodi’s professional clients and partners include: The U.S. Department of Defense, The Christopher Reeve Foundation, Intermountain Health Care, The Weber State Goddard School of Business, The National Center on Shaken Baby Syndrome, America First Credit Union, United Way (Salt Lake and Northern Utah chapters), the Doris Duke Charitable Foundation, the NOVA Principles Foundation, and One Refugee.

             Her memoir, The Sun Still Shines, won the 2016 Gold Quill and is an Amazon Bestseller. Her second book, Rise Above Depression, was released in November 2017 and hit the #1 spot on Amazon in February 2018.

             Jodi has lived in the Middle East, and on both U.S. coasts, but believes home is where you make it. She is the wife of Tolan Brown and they are parents to four amazing children.

             To hear the interview with Jodi, tune into the audio recording.

             You can also access and share all the other 100+ episodes of the podcast from this website. If you like the show, please leave us a review on iTunes/Apple podcasts and join us on our FB page. Have a great week out there creating your best life story on purpose. And don’t forget to find the beauty in the hard spaces.

             To contact Jodi or get her books:

             Email: authorjodibrown@gmail.com     

             Linkedin: jodi-orgill-brown (https://www.linkedin.com/in/jodi-orgill-brown-3613881/)

             Facebook: writerjodibrown (https://www.facebook.com/WriterJodiBrown/)

             Instagram: @jodiorgillbrown

             ]]>108 Interview Jodi Orgill Brown: The Sun Still Shines –

             Surviving a brain tumor

              

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today’s story is about a woman’s heartbreaking beautiful journey. At first blush, it’s hard to see how someone could reframe a non-operable brain tumor wrapped around the brain stem, the paralysis of the right side of her face, and on-going headaches, pain, and pressure as holding any beauty, but today we’ll find out how Jodi Orgill Brown does just that. Stay tuned for our discussion.

             Jodi Orgill Brown is a certified nonprofit consultant, as well as a professional speaker, a best-selling author, and a brain tumor survivor. Jodi’s professional clients and partners include: The U.S. Department of Defense, The Christopher Reeve Foundation, Intermountain Health Care, The Weber State Goddard School of Business, The National Center on Shaken Baby Syndrome, America First Credit Union, United Way (Salt Lake and Northern Utah chapters), the Doris Duke Charitable Foundation, the NOVA Principles Foundation, and One Refugee.

             Her memoir, The Sun Still Shines, won the 2016 Gold Quill and is an Amazon Bestseller. Her second book, Rise Above Depression, was released in November 2017 and hit the #1 spot on Amazon in February 2018.

             Jodi has lived in the Middle East, and on both U.S. coasts, but believes home is where you make it. She is the wife of Tolan Brown and they are parents to four amazing children.

             To hear the interview with Jodi, tune into the audio recording.

             You can also access and share all the other 100+ episodes of the podcast from this website. If you like the show, please leave us a review on iTunes/Apple podcasts and join us on our FB page. Have a great week out there creating your best life story on purpose. And don’t forget to find the beauty in the hard spaces.

             To contact Jodi or get her books:

             Email: authorjodibrown@gmail.com     

             Linkedin: jodi-orgill-brown (https://www.linkedin.com/in/jodi-orgill-brown-3613881/)

             Facebook: writerjodibrown (https://www.facebook.com/WriterJodiBrown/)

             Instagram: @jodiorgillbrown

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3992Wed, 10 Oct 2018 09:00:56 -070044:28falsefullToday’s story is about a woman’s heartbreaking beautiful journey. At first blush, it’s hard to see how someone could reframe a non-operable brain tumor wrapped around the brain stem, the paralysis of the right side of her face, and on-going headaches, pain, and pressure as holding any beauty, but today we’ll find out how Jodi Orgill Brown does just that. Tune in for our discussion.Lori LeeEpisode 107 Interview with Heidi Totten – What is YOUR Kenya?Episode 107 Interview with Heidi Totten – What is YOUR Kenya?

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast.

             Today we are talking about how awesome it is that we get to take underwear for granted, and how one woman is at the hub of creating underwear for women in Kenya who may have never had underwear – and most certainly do NOT take it for granted.  But it’s a lot more than just a talk about skivvies. We’re talking about 100 humanitarians international and what that means. But the question you’ll want to ask yourself when this is over is WHAT IS YOUR KENYA?

             Heidi Totten is a business strategist that creates programs and mentoring opportunities to help people transform their lives. We hear a lot of taglines like that on this podcast, but Heidi does this through a unique way of meditating and writing that helps create miracles in people’s lives; she calls it Manifesting Miracles. She is also the creator of 100 Humanitarians International, a non-profit focused on economic development in Kenya which includes teaching self-reliance and a whole lotta underwear. Let’s get the real story from Heidi –

              

             To hear the interview with Heidi, listen to the audio program.

              

             We’ve had tremendous stories of people who are creating abundance and relief for people with less in different parts of the world. Their stories are inspiring and interesting, but I love the question Heidi comes back to for our own lives which is WHAT IS YOUR KENYA? In our lives there are things we are drawn to do, and what if we just had 100 people that we influenced, touched, helped, worked with, orchestrated their talents and gifts for the forward movement of the good you feel compelled to do. It’s an interesting idea. I want to leave you with the challenge, not that you have to find 100 people for your Kenya, but to simply think about what YOUR Kenya might be. Where do you feel inclined to create something meaningful in your life?

             Thanks for being here today. Go out there and live your best life story.  Keep up the great work!

             To contact Heidi Totten:

             www.100humanitarians.com

              

             ]]>Episode 107 Interview with Heidi Totten – What is YOUR Kenya?

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast.

             Today we are talking about how awesome it is that we get to take underwear for granted, and how one woman is at the hub of creating underwear for women in Kenya who may have never had underwear – and most certainly do NOT take it for granted.  But it’s a lot more than just a talk about skivvies. We’re talking about 100 humanitarians international and what that means. But the question you’ll want to ask yourself when this is over is WHAT IS YOUR KENYA?

             Heidi Totten is a business strategist that creates programs and mentoring opportunities to help people transform their lives. We hear a lot of taglines like that on this podcast, but Heidi does this through a unique way of meditating and writing that helps create miracles in people’s lives; she calls it Manifesting Miracles. She is also the creator of 100 Humanitarians International, a non-profit focused on economic development in Kenya which includes teaching self-reliance and a whole lotta underwear. Let’s get the real story from Heidi –

              

             To hear the interview with Heidi, listen to the audio program.

              

             We’ve had tremendous stories of people who are creating abundance and relief for people with less in different parts of the world. Their stories are inspiring and interesting, but I love the question Heidi comes back to for our own lives which is WHAT IS YOUR KENYA? In our lives there are things we are drawn to do, and what if we just had 100 people that we influenced, touched, helped, worked with, orchestrated their talents and gifts for the forward movement of the good you feel compelled to do. It’s an interesting idea. I want to leave you with the challenge, not that you have to find 100 people for your Kenya, but to simply think about what YOUR Kenya might be. Where do you feel inclined to create something meaningful in your life?

             Thanks for being here today. Go out there and live your best life story.  Keep up the great work!

             To contact Heidi Totten:

             www.100humanitarians.com

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3987Wed, 03 Oct 2018 09:00:57 -070039:55falsefullToday we are talking about how awesome it is that we get to take underwear for granted, and how one woman is at the hub of creating underwear for women in Kenya who may have never had underwear – and most certainly do NOT take it for granted.  But it’s a lot more than just a talk about skivvies. We’re talking about 100 humanitarians international and what that means. But the question you’ll want to ask yourself when this is over is WHAT IS YOUR KENYA? Tune in for some inspiration and a thought-provoking question for your own life.Lori LeeEpisode 106 Wendy Yellen: Move Through the Things that Stop You, to get to the Next LevelEpisode 105 Wendy Yellen: Move Through the Things that Stop you to Get to the Next Level

              

             Wendy Yellen was named one of the international top 3 transformation experts in her field. She works in the field of Eidetic Imagery where she supports people of heart and integrity around the world to live a full, passionate, successful and unshackled life of love, awareness and compassion. I bring her to the Love Your Story podcast to provide another possible tool for getting to the bottom of any of your stories that may be holding you back.

             Today we do a little Eidetic work on the show so you can get an idea of what it is, and she shares her stories and ideas for living bigger.

             Listen to the audio program for our interview.

             If you’d like more information or to contact Wendy Yellen:

             www.myspiritualmanifesto.com

             There are many types of people and thus many types of tools that appeal to different people. Eidetic Imagery is an option. I hope you enjoyed our interview, got something out of it, and if it is of interest to you, you can learn more by contacting Wendy.

             ]]>Episode 105 Wendy Yellen: Move Through the Things that Stop you to Get to the Next Level

              

             Wendy Yellen was named one of the international top 3 transformation experts in her field. She works in the field of Eidetic Imagery where she supports people of heart and integrity around the world to live a full, passionate, successful and unshackled life of love, awareness and compassion. I bring her to the Love Your Story podcast to provide another possible tool for getting to the bottom of any of your stories that may be holding you back.

             Today we do a little Eidetic work on the show so you can get an idea of what it is, and she shares her stories and ideas for living bigger.

             Listen to the audio program for our interview.

             If you’d like more information or to contact Wendy Yellen:

             www.myspiritualmanifesto.com

             There are many types of people and thus many types of tools that appeal to different people. Eidetic Imagery is an option. I hope you enjoyed our interview, got something out of it, and if it is of interest to you, you can learn more by contacting Wendy.

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3885Wed, 26 Sep 2018 09:00:34 -070001:01:20falsefullWendy Yellen was named one of the international top 3 transformation experts in her field. She works in the field of Eidetic Imagery where she supports people of heart and integrity around the world to live a full, passionate, successful and unshackled life of love, awareness and compassion. I bring her to the Love Your Story podcast to provide another possible tool for getting to the bottom of any of your stories that may be holding you back. Would this be something that would work for you?Lori LeeEpisode 105 We All Know FearEpisode 104: We All Know Fear

             We all know fear. We’ve come up short as the fear of rejection stopped us from being vulnerable with someone, or stopped us from creating a relationship, or stopped us from sharing ourselves or an idea. We’ve known the fear of failure as we’ve contemplated doing something risky and then done an about-face as the wash of “what-if-it doesn’t-work” engulfs us.

             Fear of failure, fear of the unknown, fear of rejection are internally generated. These fears come from evolution –based circumstances. A need to be part of a community (so not wanting to alienate others), a need to know outcomes (fear of the unknown), a need to survive. Fear of the dark stems from being in a space where our senses cannot inform us of what is around us. It’s very natural to fear not-knowing. Fear is a big part of the human experience, but facing fear is the only way through it. Stay tuned for a head-on tackle of this all too familiar topic.

             In order to manage fear and to gauge which actions we will take and which ones we won’t, we ask “What If” questions. What if I try this and I fail? What if it doesn’t work? What if I make a decision and in a few years I’m not happy? What if people think I’m stupid, or if I ruin my reputation? What if my idea is too elementary? What if I get told no? What if I get hurt?

             It’s normal to ask these questions. It’s how we gauge risk. But there is a point where these questions quit serving us and they simply hold us back, paralyze us, keep us small.

             Here are a few other questions to ask yourself after you’ve listened to all the self-preservation questions: What IF it didn’t work out? Does the world really end? Would I regret the courage and adventure of trying for this, of attempting to live bigger, of loving and risking for the life with the most potential? What if it DID work out? What adventures might I find along the way? What will I learn as I let myself focus on success instead of fear? What’s really possible if I chose courage and possibility instead of fear? Do I want to still be who I am and where I am now, five years from now?

             Let me share a personal story:

             A few weeks ago I headed out on a backpacking trip with nine other people into the Wallowa mountain range. You’ll remember Lydia McGranahan, the woman who found Annie Schmidt’s body and Marty Newey, the man in Annie Schmidt’s search party from episodes 73, 74 and 75. I was invited to join this group on their annual adventure because we all wanted to meet, and because we all love nature and adventures, and because with my experience as an outdoor recreationalist – being a hiking guidebook writer – they believed I would be up for the challenge. As did I. We carpooled to Oregon, a group of 9 people. I had four in my car, with every intention that we would be spending the next 5 days together in the mountains. The plan was that we’d start out with a 6-mile day, then a 12 mile, then a 5 mile, then a 10 mile and then a 4 mile with daily side hikes tacked on. Well, I have spent many years backpacking and I know my limits well. I know that with a full pack I can punch out 8 miles a day before my feet and resolve have worn out. But, I had really wanted to come with this group and I figured if Marty, who is almost 60 could pump out that type of mileage, I could push through it. I went in with hope, but by the end of day 1, which had actually turned out to be about a mile and a half longer than projected, I was at my max for the day and I didn’t want to think about getting up bright and early as the sun warmed my tent, strapping my pack back on my aching hips and shoulders, and kicking out an additional 12 miles. The pace would be grueling. We’d climbed 3000 feet with a full pack on day one. It had been a good day, but now we were at a beautiful mountain lake, 7.5 miles into the Wallowa-Whitman National Forest and setting up a base camp was what I would do if left to my own devices. I’d set]]>Episode 104: We All Know Fear

             We all know fear. We’ve come up short as the fear of rejection stopped us from being vulnerable with someone, or stopped us from creating a relationship, or stopped us from sharing ourselves or an idea. We’ve known the fear of failure as we’ve contemplated doing something risky and then done an about-face as the wash of “what-if-it doesn’t-work” engulfs us.

             Fear of failure, fear of the unknown, fear of rejection are internally generated. These fears come from evolution –based circumstances. A need to be part of a community (so not wanting to alienate others), a need to know outcomes (fear of the unknown), a need to survive. Fear of the dark stems from being in a space where our senses cannot inform us of what is around us. It’s very natural to fear not-knowing. Fear is a big part of the human experience, but facing fear is the only way through it. Stay tuned for a head-on tackle of this all too familiar topic.

             In order to manage fear and to gauge which actions we will take and which ones we won’t, we ask “What If” questions. What if I try this and I fail? What if it doesn’t work? What if I make a decision and in a few years I’m not happy? What if people think I’m stupid, or if I ruin my reputation? What if my idea is too elementary? What if I get told no? What if I get hurt?

             It’s normal to ask these questions. It’s how we gauge risk. But there is a point where these questions quit serving us and they simply hold us back, paralyze us, keep us small.

             Here are a few other questions to ask yourself after you’ve listened to all the self-preservation questions: What IF it didn’t work out? Does the world really end? Would I regret the courage and adventure of trying for this, of attempting to live bigger, of loving and risking for the life with the most potential? What if it DID work out? What adventures might I find along the way? What will I learn as I let myself focus on success instead of fear? What’s really possible if I chose courage and possibility instead of fear? Do I want to still be who I am and where I am now, five years from now?

             Let me share a personal story:

             A few weeks ago I headed out on a backpacking trip with nine other people into the Wallowa mountain range. You’ll remember Lydia McGranahan, the woman who found Annie Schmidt’s body and Marty Newey, the man in Annie Schmidt’s search party from episodes 73, 74 and 75. I was invited to join this group on their annual adventure because we all wanted to meet, and because we all love nature and adventures, and because with my experience as an outdoor recreationalist – being a hiking guidebook writer – they believed I would be up for the challenge. As did I. We carpooled to Oregon, a group of 9 people. I had four in my car, with every intention that we would be spending the next 5 days together in the mountains. The plan was that we’d start out with a 6-mile day, then a 12 mile, then a 5 mile, then a 10 mile and then a 4 mile with daily side hikes tacked on. Well, I have spent many years backpacking and I know my limits well. I know that with a full pack I can punch out 8 miles a day before my feet and resolve have worn out. But, I had really wanted to come with this group and I figured if Marty, who is almost 60 could pump out that type of mileage, I could push through it. I went in with hope, but by the end of day 1, which had actually turned out to be about a mile and a half longer than projected, I was at my max for the day and I didn’t want to think about getting up bright and early as the sun warmed my tent, strapping my pack back on my aching hips and shoulders, and kicking out an additional 12 miles. The pace would be grueling. We’d climbed 3000 feet with a full pack on day one. It had been a good day, but now we were at a beautiful mountain lake, 7.5 miles into the Wallowa-Whitman National Forest and setting up a base camp was what I would do if left to my own devices. I’d set up a base camp, do day hikes without the pack and take time for taking it all in. My 17-year-old son was feeling similarly tired and I contemplated how to deal with the situation. We had driven 500 miles to backpack with this group of people that I was anxious to spend time with. We had been invited because they felt we were capable of the trip. I had a reputation as an outdoor recreationalist and expert in some cases because of my books. And now here I was contemplating the best step forward which might include some type of separation from the group. I considered the fear of disappointing others; the fear of damaging my reputation; the fear that I was being selfish. As I discussed it with my son he said, “Mom, I’d love to stay and do a base camp, but you just can’t. These people really look up to you and you will blow your reputation.”

             Well, with my typical inability to bottle my thoughts and emotions, that night I faced the fears in order to be true to what I felt like I could reasonably do. At first, I think Lydia thought I was joking around, but I finally said, “You know, I do nature differently than you do. You guys are incredible athletes and you put your head down and you challenge the mountain and you cruise through it. I like to BE in it. I like to sit by the lakes and spend time writing and meditating in the trees. I like to go at a pace that allows me to lift my eyes off the rocky trail and see what I’m hiking through. I want to set up a base camp.

             We had a group prayer before bed and I told them all I loved them, and then I crawled into my tent. I tossed and turned a lot of the night trying to decide if I dared actually break away from these beautiful people I had come to spend the week with. I didn’t want to. I didn’t want to miss this opportunity to spend days and nights in the mountains with them. I wanted time with each of them, but I knew my limitations. In the morning Marty approached me, in his thoughtful way and tried to make it sound as if I’d be doing him a favor if I could stay with a base group of others who weren’t wanting to tackle the aggressive schedule either. As it turned out we broke into two groups. A group of 5 headed off over the passes and pumped out 50 miles over the next 4 days, and my group put in 20 miles and 4000 feet of elevation gain. As we parted ways that day I said to Marty, “Everything is turning out exactly as it’s supposed to.” That was my consolatory comment as I broke up the group he’d so carefully put together. I didn’t know that the “supposed to” was going to look like, but I knew that facing my fears, my limitations, providing a space for others to enjoy the different way of experiencing the trip felt like the right thing to do. And was it ever!! What we got was time swimming in 3 different lakes – Aneroid, Wallowa, and a small pond along the trail; a night sitting under the eve of a cabin during a thunderstorm watching the lightning while our friends were backpacking their way over the passes and sloshing through the storm; we played cards and met Dennis the groundskeeper, who managed a collection of 100-year-old rustic cabins up around the lake. We talked and laughed and hiked, and in the end, four people who hadn’t known one another before the trip were the best of friends. Like family. We had time to really get to know one another in a way we certainly would not have with the dilution of the larger group.

             I tell this story, to illustrate my personal fears that popped up. Was my reputation damaged? Did I disappoint others in the group? I don’t know the answers to those questions. I think perhaps, a little, but by facing those fears instead of letting them dictate and push me into a space I was not comfortable in, the right things happened. It was interesting to watch the wonderful serendipity that accompanied our group. Megan had brought a sleeping bag that wasn’t warm enough for the 32 degree nights. She started throwing out the idea of finding another camper and buying a blanket off them. Then Dennis shows up – in the rainstorm he offered us shelter and when she broached the subject of buying a blanket from him later he gave us 3 big wool blankets we could use during the cold night at higher elevation, and then return them to him so it was not a weight added to the pack – best possible scenario. In order to keep Megan warm Ethan and I crowded 3 people into her two-person tent, which turned out perfect because the elastic in my tent poles was shot and my tent had to be Jimmy rigged into a claustrophobic low rider that wasn’t fun for anything but laying flat on your back. Dan’s decision, the fourth member in our party, to join us was perfect because his sense of humor and easy-going nature, his connection with Megan and appreciation of Ethan made the group dynamic exactly what it needed to be. I had time alone with Megan to conduct an interview with her for this podcast and we were able to talk about her attempted suicide and her story leading up to those events in her life. We sang at the top of our lungs as we drove home. We laughed and ordered pizza and found suckers with scorpions, which was apparently on Ethan’s bucket list. In short – it was exactly what it needed to be and it was made possible because I faced my fears of social rejection through the damage of my reputation, and as it turned out, facing my fear of upsetting others because I had a desire to take a different approach to our situation was instead met with others who also appreciated the opportunity to take my desired approach. If I had let the fears dictate my direction, an entirely different experience would have unfolded.

             Nelson Mandela said, “I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid but he who conquers that fear.”

             If you are living a life that is not fulfilling, a life dead with boredom, a story where the possibilities for rich passionate living have been left in the past, on the table, lost in the recesses of a younger you, or maybe your life just needs a bit of an update or you want a relationship you don’t have or to learn something new. Your choice is to either stay in the comfort zone that has brought you to your current space or to manage the questions and fears that keep you creating what you are creating.

             Events themselves only hold the power we give them. Even the information our senses bring to us do not have meaning in and of themselves, they are information that we then give meaning to.  We are the meaning creators. That means we also have the capability to shift the meanings that we are giving our fears. Fear of failure is a projection of events into the future. What if the projection was one of success instead?

             Let me share a couple of things to consider as we discuss overcoming the fear of failure.

             1. Reframe your mindset about failure – would it really be so horrible to try and in the worst outcome learn rather than get the outcome you expected? We live and we learn. Mistakes are just MIS takes. We can always regroup. In the movie Thor: Ragnarok, a Marvel Comic film, Thor says, “Oh I make grave mistakes all the time; everything seems to work out.”
             2. Realize that the journey and the courage for the journey is the beauty of creating – and you get to do it your way. The mindset focused on success is far more likely to succeed than that the mindset based on fear.
             3. Get excited about the things that you want to add to your life, that are just out of reach because of your fear, and push through because you want that passion, you want that stretch, you want to try all the things that YOUR soul yearns for before you leave this life. Get excited about that rich and thrilling possibility. Start picturing the success.
             4. Consider inaction. If you were the exact same person you are today, in five years, would you be happy with that? If not, action is required.
             5. Faith is the opposite of fear. Fear is of the devil to stop us. Faith is the power to envision, believe and create – a literal power. Which do you choose?

             
             

             Another quote from Thor in Ragnarok that I love from the “story” perspective is, “I choose to run toward my problems, not away from them, because that’s what heroes do.”

             So, here’s an example of a hero move – a woman named Christine Lavulo shares her story of running up against fear in her career and how she dealt with it.

              

             Listen to the audio recording to hear Christine’s story.

              

             There is a story I will end with. It’s called The Giant.

             I found this story in the book -Lead with a Story, by Paul Smith. (American Management Association, 2012, Pg 144-145)

              

             Once upon a time, in a land far away, there lived a very bright and trustworthy young woman. Having learned all she could in her own village, she set out to explore the neighboring lands. After some time, she came upon a great city surrounded by a huge castle wall. “Surely I can learn something new from the people here,” she thought to herself. But after entering the city, she found its people too frightened and depressed to share any wisdom. “Why is everyone here so sad?” she asked. One trembling citizen answered, “Today is the day the giant comes.”

             “Giant?” she scoffed in disbelief. “There’s no such thing as giants.”;

             “Oh, but there is,” came the response. “He stands over 10 feet tall! So tall, he can’t rightly be called a man at all.”

             Skeptical, but intrigued, the young woman pleaded, “Tell me more of this giant.”

             So the frightened citizen nervously explained to her, “Every year, on the same day, and at the same hour, he comes down from the mountain where he lives. He stands at the edge of the clearing and yells, ‘Send out your bravest man for me to fight, or I will knock down these walls and kill everyone inside!’ Each year, one poor valiant soul steps out to face the giant and there he stands, mesmerized by the giant’s enormity and the impossible task ahead. Every year the giant slays the poor warrior where he stands before he even draws his sword. The warrior doesn’t even move. It’s as if he is hypnotized.”

             Eyes wide with fascination, the woman begs, “Can I see this giant?”

             “The only way to see the giant,” the citizen explained “is to face him in battle.”

             “Eager to learn, the woman responded, “Then that is what I will do.”

             Shortly thereafter the voice of the giant rang through the village and the woman stepped out to meet him.

             She looked out across the clearing to the edge of the forest at the foothills of the mountain. Sure enough, there stood an enormous giant! For a moment, she just stood and stared at him from a distance. There was a gentle rise in the ground separating the two, so she could only see him from the waist up. It was difficult to tell exactly how big he was, but he was clearly taller than any man she had ever seen or heard of. She was struck with the same awe and terror all of her predecessors surely felt at that moment. The giant was real. Facing him today she would surely die. She considered running back inside the castle walls, but she had given her word to the people to face their giant, so with all the bravery she could muster she began to walk tentatively toward the giant. And, the giant began to walk toward her.

             After a few paces up the gentle incline, she gained a full line of sight to the giant and she could see his whole form. With the better angle, she could tell he was not nearly the 10 feet in height she first believed but was perhaps only 7-feet-tall. He was still massive, but at least now in human proportions. She was still no match for him, but at least she would meet her defeat at the hands of something recognizable.

             With that element of the unknown removed, she was able to walk at a normal pace and after a few more steps the giant appeared to be smaller still. Was this some strange optical illusion? The giant appeared to be not much bigger than she was now. She might actually have a chance! With this new hope, her pace quickened. And with every step, she could tell it was no illusion. The giant was actually shrinking before her very eyes and the faster she ran, the faster the giant shrank.

             Her terror had turned to hope, and now that hope and turned to confidence. Certain of her victory, she was now in an all-out sprint toward the giant. As she reached the middle of the clearing she stopped and stood toe-to-toe with the “giant” who was now only 12 inches tall and still shrinking. She reached down and picked him up in the palm of her hand. She only had time to ask one question before he disappeared. “Who are you?” she said.

             The giant responded in a tiny and dwindling voice, “I am known by many names, but to your people I am known as fear.”

             When I started the Love Your Story podcast there was fear of many things. Fear of being thought pedantic, fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of vulnerability and sharing too much, fear of telling my own story, fear of wasting time and money. I still feel fear when I create something new. When I created the 21 Challenges I feared no one would sign up. When I create classes and tools I fear no one will want them. As I create the retreat coming up in January 2019 I face the fear that no one will sign up. In hindsight, I rejoice that I faced and overcame each fear – that I pushed past them because of what I have created, because of the people who have been on this path with me, because of who I am now vs. who I was then. The giant is so small now around so many things I have to look back and remember oh ya, I WAS afraid.

             This past weekend I was at a rappelling event and I watched a woman who had never rappelled face her fear. The going was VERY slow as she let herself off the cliff and the rap down was inch by inch, but once the fear was faced the giant was smaller. Her second time down was twice as fast and her anxiety was significantly reduced. One step at a time we move forward. One step at a time the giant shrinks. Take the step before you – just one step at a time.

             Take Action! We all make mistakes – lots of them, that’s part of the game. Don’t let the fear of not hitting the home run stop you from getting in the game. If you don’t step up to bat you are just gonna sit on the sidelines, and that’s not much of a story. Everyone who ever learned how to walk fell down over and over again. Everyone who learned to play an instrument has hit a thousand wrong notes. Everyone who learned to play a sport missed lots of shots. We don’t ever learn something new without making mistakes, they are a fact of life. So, when the fear boils up in you – the fear of making a mistake, the fear of rejection, the fear of failure, just remember that facing the fear is what will make it smaller, facing the fear is the only way to go, learn, be or do anything that sits on the other side of the block, and that may be exactly what you need is found on the other side of that fear. Courage creates possibility – and one hell of a better story.

             Thanks for being with me. Your challenge for the week is to find one thing you’re afraid of, just one thing, and do it! It becomes easier with practice. The more you face your fears, the smaller they get. Go face one. It’s what heroes do.

             Don’t forget to leave us a review on iTunes, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your podcasts, if you like the podcast, and share it with a friend. The more people who listen the more good these ideas can do. Share the love people.

              

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3882Wed, 19 Sep 2018 09:00:34 -070030:10falsefullWe all know fear. We’ve come up short as the fear of rejection stopped us from being vulnerable with someone, or stopped us from creating a relationship, or stopped us from sharing ourselves or an idea. We’ve known the fear of failure as we’ve contemplated doing something risky and then done an about-face as the wash of “what-if-it doesn’t-work” engulfs us. Fear of failure, fear of the unknown, fear of rejection are internally generated. Join me today for a discussion and a few stories on why choosing fear keeps us small and pushing past it moves us forward toward our best life stories.Lori LeeEpisode 104 Interview Taunia Dawn Terry – Part 2: There Is a Price to Pay for Freedom and Joy 

             Episode 104 Interview Taunia Dawn Terry

             Part 2: There Is a Price to Pay for Freedom and Joy

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today Part 2 of my interview with Taunia Dawn Terry hits the airwaves.

             If you’re just joining us, go back and listen to her story in Part 1 because Part 2 is a our candid discussion about a woman who has beautiful spiritual gifts of intuition and healing, but Part 1 tells you how she got there. This two-part series includes a story of living through a Satanic ritual, five marriages/divorces, and a transformational path where she discovered how to listen to her higher power, how to face fear, how to pay the price for freedom, and how to uncover and use her spiritual gifts.

             Taunia Dawn Terry brings a unique approach to personal transformation. She currently works as a transformation coach, where she is known for her intuition in the Healing arts, Neurofeedback and life coaching. Taunia is an expert at guiding her clients through the chaos of change so they can transform their pain and fear into wisdom and courage. Wh is all about maximizing freedom, joy, peace, and abundance for living an ideal and authentic life.

             When speaking of healing and transformation, Taunia said,

             “There’s a price to pay for your freedom and joy. Though there is definitely a Divine grace that bestows those gifts, it is also something that must be earned. It would not be valued if you didn’t recognize the cost – in order to heal you must learn the lessons, grow, and change. You can’t have anyone else take your life tests for you.”

             Tune into the audio program for part 2 of a 2-part series and the story of how one woman survived the unspeakable, stood for change, and did what it takes to create a new story.

             We talk about the process of Awakening, Exploring, Choosing and Being. It’s good stuff.

             To contact Taunia Dawn Terry: taunia@tauniadawn.com

             Business Phone: 385-352-3233

             ]]> 

             Episode 104 Interview Taunia Dawn Terry

             Part 2: There Is a Price to Pay for Freedom and Joy

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today Part 2 of my interview with Taunia Dawn Terry hits the airwaves.

             If you’re just joining us, go back and listen to her story in Part 1 because Part 2 is a our candid discussion about a woman who has beautiful spiritual gifts of intuition and healing, but Part 1 tells you how she got there. This two-part series includes a story of living through a Satanic ritual, five marriages/divorces, and a transformational path where she discovered how to listen to her higher power, how to face fear, how to pay the price for freedom, and how to uncover and use her spiritual gifts.

             Taunia Dawn Terry brings a unique approach to personal transformation. She currently works as a transformation coach, where she is known for her intuition in the Healing arts, Neurofeedback and life coaching. Taunia is an expert at guiding her clients through the chaos of change so they can transform their pain and fear into wisdom and courage. Wh is all about maximizing freedom, joy, peace, and abundance for living an ideal and authentic life.

             When speaking of healing and transformation, Taunia said,

             “There’s a price to pay for your freedom and joy. Though there is definitely a Divine grace that bestows those gifts, it is also something that must be earned. It would not be valued if you didn’t recognize the cost – in order to heal you must learn the lessons, grow, and change. You can’t have anyone else take your life tests for you.”

             Tune into the audio program for part 2 of a 2-part series and the story of how one woman survived the unspeakable, stood for change, and did what it takes to create a new story.

             We talk about the process of Awakening, Exploring, Choosing and Being. It’s good stuff.

             To contact Taunia Dawn Terry: taunia@tauniadawn.com

             Business Phone: 385-352-3233

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3857Wed, 12 Sep 2018 09:00:25 -070051:35falsefullJoin us for Part 2 of this 2-part interview series with Taunia Dawn Terry, a survivor of a satanic ritual, 5 abusive marriages, and the powerful story of saying "this shit stops here!" This woman shows us her path to awakening, exploring, choosing and ultimately being. Watch her path as she tells her story and provides and example of transformation.Lori LeeEpisode 103 Interview Taunia Dawn Terry – Part 1: There Is a Price to Pay for Freedom and JoyEpisode 103 Interview Taunia Dawn Terry – Part 1: There Is a Price to Pay for Freedom and Joy

              

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today I have a double treat for you. My interview with Taunia Dawn Terry is one that involves one hell of a story, but spoiler alert, it ends with a woman who has beautiful spiritual gifts of intuition and healing. This two-part series includes a story of living through a Satanic ritual, five marriages/divorces, and a transformational path where she discovered how to listen to her higher power, how to face fear, how to pay the price for freedom,  and how to uncover and use her spiritual gifts. Stay tuned for my interview with Taunia and the first episode in this series.

             Taunia Dawn Terry brings a unique approach to personal transformation. She currently works as a transformation coach, where she is known for her intuition in the Healing arts, Neuro  feedback and life coaching. Taunia is an expert at guiding her clients through the chaos of change so they can transform their pain and fear into wisdom and courage. Wh is all about maximizing freedom, joy, peace and abundance for living an ideal and authentic life.

             Tune into the audio program for part 1 of a 2-part series and the story of how one woman survived the unspeakable, stood for change, and did what it takes to create a new story.

             When speaking of healing and transformation, Taunia said, “There’s a price to pay for your freedom and joy. Though there is definitely a Divine grace that bestows those gifts, it is also something that must be earned. It would not be valued if you didn’t recognize the cost – in order to heal you must learn the lessons, grow, and change. You can’t have anyone else take your life tests for you.”

             To contact Taunia Dawn Terry: taunia@tauniadawn.com

             Business Phone: 385-352-3233

             ]]>Episode 103 Interview Taunia Dawn Terry – Part 1: There Is a Price to Pay for Freedom and Joy

              

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today I have a double treat for you. My interview with Taunia Dawn Terry is one that involves one hell of a story, but spoiler alert, it ends with a woman who has beautiful spiritual gifts of intuition and healing. This two-part series includes a story of living through a Satanic ritual, five marriages/divorces, and a transformational path where she discovered how to listen to her higher power, how to face fear, how to pay the price for freedom,  and how to uncover and use her spiritual gifts. Stay tuned for my interview with Taunia and the first episode in this series.

             Taunia Dawn Terry brings a unique approach to personal transformation. She currently works as a transformation coach, where she is known for her intuition in the Healing arts, Neuro  feedback and life coaching. Taunia is an expert at guiding her clients through the chaos of change so they can transform their pain and fear into wisdom and courage. Wh is all about maximizing freedom, joy, peace and abundance for living an ideal and authentic life.

             Tune into the audio program for part 1 of a 2-part series and the story of how one woman survived the unspeakable, stood for change, and did what it takes to create a new story.

             When speaking of healing and transformation, Taunia said, “There’s a price to pay for your freedom and joy. Though there is definitely a Divine grace that bestows those gifts, it is also something that must be earned. It would not be valued if you didn’t recognize the cost – in order to heal you must learn the lessons, grow, and change. You can’t have anyone else take your life tests for you.”

             To contact Taunia Dawn Terry: taunia@tauniadawn.com

             Business Phone: 385-352-3233

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3843Wed, 05 Sep 2018 09:00:19 -070039:49falsefullMy interview with Taunia Dawn Terry is one that involves one hell of a story, but spoiler alert, it ends with a woman who has beautiful spiritual gifts of intuition and healing. This two-part series includes a story of living through a Satanic ritual, five marriages/divorces, and a transformational path where she discovered how to listen to her higher power, how to face fear, how to pay the price for freedom,  and how to uncover and use her spiritual gifts. Tune in for my interview with Taunia and the first episode in this series.Lori LeeEpisode 102 Stories from the Academy Drum and Bugle Corps.Episode 102 Stories from the Drum and Bugle Corps.

             Academy Drum and Bugle Corps is a world-class professional marching band out of Tempe Arizona. 

             Today’s episode is a group interview with some of these impressive and talented young musicians as we sat out on the field after they finished up a 10-hour practice on a hot July day. Stay tuned for their stories of learning, self-discipline, overcoming, and motivation.

             I loved talking with these kids because these young adults choose to be involved in a tremendously demanding program that requires strict discipline, and they choose this course rather than a summer of video games, strolling the malls, and snap chatting aimlessly with their friends. It’s a choice to create a story of excellence, family-like bonds through the hours of working in synchronicity with one another, and living on the road, sleeping on gym floors, and bringing their all on the competition field.

             In 2001, The Academy Brass & Percussion Ensemble was formed to give some of Arizona’s finest young musicians an introduction to the incredibly unique activity of drum and bugle corps. They started out with a membership of 50-60 musicians. In 2004, the group added the final element of the color guard, was accepted as a DCI sanctioned unit, made the name change to The Academy Drum and Bugle Corps and began competing for the first time.

             In 2006, the corps had grown to 135 members and competed for the first time in Drum Corps International World Championships in Madison, Wisconsin where they earned the title of Division II World Champion. 2007 marked their first year competing in Division I, now called World Class, where they continue to compete today. In 2009, The Academy was named the official drum and bugle corps of the City of Tempe. 2016 marked a historic season for the corps with its first appearance in World Class Finals competition and the corps is now in the middle of another stellar season – touring and competing.

             Today I interviewed a group of the musicians, as they finished up their final practice for the day.

             To hear the interviews listen to the audio show where we get the inside scoop and discuss some great tools:

             1. Try out – get in the game.
             2. Stay in the present.
             3. Focus on the goal of excellence.
             4. Keep coming back.

             
             

             For more information on the Academy drum and bugle corps go to: www.arizonaacademy.org

             Thanks for tuning in to today’s episode. I hope you found one takeaway that inspires you! Keep creating your best life story, and if there is someplace you’ve been holding back, maybe you’ve been afraid to try for something, join some group, get in the game…remember, you DON’T make 100% of the things you don’t try for. Let’s get in the game.

             www.loveyourstorypodcast.com for access to all the 100+ episodes, each one full of inspiration and empowering ideas for living your best life story. You can also sign up for the 21 LIFE Connection Challenge on the site. Join us for the next group challenge and start creating new results in your life. ! See you next week.

             ]]>Episode 102 Stories from the Drum and Bugle Corps.

             Academy Drum and Bugle Corps is a world-class professional marching band out of Tempe Arizona. 

             Today’s episode is a group interview with some of these impressive and talented young musicians as we sat out on the field after they finished up a 10-hour practice on a hot July day. Stay tuned for their stories of learning, self-discipline, overcoming, and motivation.

             I loved talking with these kids because these young adults choose to be involved in a tremendously demanding program that requires strict discipline, and they choose this course rather than a summer of video games, strolling the malls, and snap chatting aimlessly with their friends. It’s a choice to create a story of excellence, family-like bonds through the hours of working in synchronicity with one another, and living on the road, sleeping on gym floors, and bringing their all on the competition field.

             In 2001, The Academy Brass & Percussion Ensemble was formed to give some of Arizona’s finest young musicians an introduction to the incredibly unique activity of drum and bugle corps. They started out with a membership of 50-60 musicians. In 2004, the group added the final element of the color guard, was accepted as a DCI sanctioned unit, made the name change to The Academy Drum and Bugle Corps and began competing for the first time.

             In 2006, the corps had grown to 135 members and competed for the first time in Drum Corps International World Championships in Madison, Wisconsin where they earned the title of Division II World Champion. 2007 marked their first year competing in Division I, now called World Class, where they continue to compete today. In 2009, The Academy was named the official drum and bugle corps of the City of Tempe. 2016 marked a historic season for the corps with its first appearance in World Class Finals competition and the corps is now in the middle of another stellar season – touring and competing.

             Today I interviewed a group of the musicians, as they finished up their final practice for the day.

             To hear the interviews listen to the audio show where we get the inside scoop and discuss some great tools:

             1. Try out – get in the game.
             2. Stay in the present.
             3. Focus on the goal of excellence.
             4. Keep coming back.

             
             

             For more information on the Academy drum and bugle corps go to: www.arizonaacademy.org

             Thanks for tuning in to today’s episode. I hope you found one takeaway that inspires you! Keep creating your best life story, and if there is someplace you’ve been holding back, maybe you’ve been afraid to try for something, join some group, get in the game…remember, you DON’T make 100% of the things you don’t try for. Let’s get in the game.

             www.loveyourstorypodcast.com for access to all the 100+ episodes, each one full of inspiration and empowering ideas for living your best life story. You can also sign up for the 21 LIFE Connection Challenge on the site. Join us for the next group challenge and start creating new results in your life. ! See you next week.

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3831Wed, 29 Aug 2018 09:00:38 -070032:18falsefullAcademy Drum and Bugle Corps Is a world-class professional marching band out of Tempe Arizona.  Today’s episode is a group interview with some of these impressive and talented young musicians as we sat out on the field after they finished up a 10-hour practice on a hot July day. Stay tuned for their stories of learning, self-discipline, overcoming, and motivation. These kids are making a choice to stretch and achieve, not hang out on social media and walk the malls of America.Lori LeeEpisode 101 The Kjars: Part 3 – 50 States in 52 Weeks ConcludesEpisode 101 The Kjars: Part 3 – Travels to all 50 States Concludes

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. For those of you that are loyal listeners, you’ll already be familiar with the Kjars – the family traveling to all 50 states in 52 weeks in their motor home, meeting with other kids and families to see how other people in our country live.

             In the first interview – episode 45 they had just shadowed kids who were real-life cowboys – spending their days on ranches, and weightlifters competing and training.

             In our second iinterview, episode 61, they had just finished spending time with the Amish and walking the sacred ground of Gettysburg.

             Now they’ve just finished up Hawaii and Alaska and they are here to tell us the stories of their latest adventures as they finish up the 50^th state and return home. Stay tuned to catch up with the Kjars.

             Tune into the audio program for my interview with Matt and Lindsay.

             You can see their adventures on 50×52.com  and on YouTube, Instagram, and Facebook.

             https://www.facebook.com/50by52InYourShoes/

             https://www.50by52.com/

             ]]>Episode 101 The Kjars: Part 3 – Travels to all 50 States Concludes

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. For those of you that are loyal listeners, you’ll already be familiar with the Kjars – the family traveling to all 50 states in 52 weeks in their motor home, meeting with other kids and families to see how other people in our country live.

             In the first interview – episode 45 they had just shadowed kids who were real-life cowboys – spending their days on ranches, and weightlifters competing and training.

             In our second iinterview, episode 61, they had just finished spending time with the Amish and walking the sacred ground of Gettysburg.

             Now they’ve just finished up Hawaii and Alaska and they are here to tell us the stories of their latest adventures as they finish up the 50^th state and return home. Stay tuned to catch up with the Kjars.

             Tune into the audio program for my interview with Matt and Lindsay.

             You can see their adventures on 50×52.com  and on YouTube, Instagram, and Facebook.

             https://www.facebook.com/50by52InYourShoes/

             https://www.50by52.com/

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3738Wed, 22 Aug 2018 09:00:46 -070036:13falsefullJoin us for episode 3 with the Kjars - the family traveling around the country in their motor home and covering 50 states in 52 weeks. This is the final stage of their year-long journey. Where did the end up with things? Did they regret selling their house and becoming nomads? What did they learn? Are they happy to end this chapter or their brave journey? Tune in.Lori LeeEpisode 100 The Mentor: We’re all in this TogetherThe Mentor – We’re all in this Together

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. You are tuned in for episode 100, and today we are talking about the third story archetype (the third one I’ve tackled on the podcast) – the Mentor.  Joseph Campbell, in his book The Hero of a Thousand Faces, claimed that the most popular stories over millennia and across cultures, share a specific formula- the hero’s journeHero’s hero’s Journey has a specific plot structure, but it also has a repeating cast of characters, known as character archetypes. Archetypes tell us the role a character plays in the story – for instance, the hero is one of the archetypes, the threshold guardian that talked about in episode 72 is another, and the Herald that we talked about in episode 93 is yet another example. The archetype we’re talking about today is the MENTOR.  You’ll want to tune in today because nobody does this thing called LIFE on their own. We need each other. It’s why the MENTOR is such an important archetype in the story formula and in the stories of our lives. Today we’re going to start a discussion about those special people who show up at the cross roads for us, about the wise who give us sage advice, about the moments those mentors gift us with the perfect magic elixir we need in the moment, and about how we also play that most important role in the lives of the people in our story. Why is the Mentor such an important character? Because who hasn’t wished for a fairy godmother from time to time, or wanted their own Obi Wan Kenobi to show up and give them a light-saber, or when we are walking through the dark forests of our lives running from danger – who couldn’t do with the 7 dwarves showing up to give you shelter and safety as they did with Snow White? When you’re out on your scariest, out-of-your-comfort-zone stretches in life, like Dorthy in the Wizard of Oz, have you noticed how people show up along your path to give you clues, advice, and heart? Have you noticed that people show up to walk your path with you, like the Lion, the Tin Man or the Scarcrow? Stay tuned because it’s important to realize and acknowledge how much we need other people and  how important it is for us to show up for them as well.

             When I was 16 my parents and I got in a fight. The final shake out was a ultimatum – follow the rules or find someplace else to live. I moved out. I moved to Southern California with my aunt and uncle and therein started a type of mentor relationship with my Aunt Katie.  When I moved to California I was frustrated at not being trusted and not being listened to at home. I was coming from a really good home with really strict rules, and the big fight in question happened because I tried to do my laundry on Sunday – and that was a no-no. I, as the hero in this story, was on a journey of growing up. I knew what I wanted, where I wanted to be, how I wanted to do things and I certainly didn’t need shackles and restrictions or other people’s ideas of how to do things. Heck I was 16 years old and had it figured out. No really. I did. So, when I moved to Orange County California and my aunt listened to me, treated me like an adult, wore cool clothes and did cool things I felt excited with new possibilities. She was wise and we would talk about real life. That was new. She gave good advice but didn’t push me. She gave me the gifts of shelter, food, ideas and respect that this little hero needed at this stage of her story. I went back home after spending a summer at the beach and working at the local theatre and I was further along my hero’s journey because a woman who would prove to be my mentor in many ways and for many years showed up at that crossroads.

             Who are the mentors in your life? Can you think of them right off the bat? If not, here are a couple leading ideas…. The mentor character is the]]>The Mentor – We’re all in this Together

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. You are tuned in for episode 100, and today we are talking about the third story archetype (the third one I’ve tackled on the podcast) – the Mentor.  Joseph Campbell, in his book The Hero of a Thousand Faces, claimed that the most popular stories over millennia and across cultures, share a specific formula- the hero’s journeHero’s hero’s Journey has a specific plot structure, but it also has a repeating cast of characters, known as character archetypes. Archetypes tell us the role a character plays in the story – for instance, the hero is one of the archetypes, the threshold guardian that talked about in episode 72 is another, and the Herald that we talked about in episode 93 is yet another example. The archetype we’re talking about today is the MENTOR.  You’ll want to tune in today because nobody does this thing called LIFE on their own. We need each other. It’s why the MENTOR is such an important archetype in the story formula and in the stories of our lives. Today we’re going to start a discussion about those special people who show up at the cross roads for us, about the wise who give us sage advice, about the moments those mentors gift us with the perfect magic elixir we need in the moment, and about how we also play that most important role in the lives of the people in our story. Why is the Mentor such an important character? Because who hasn’t wished for a fairy godmother from time to time, or wanted their own Obi Wan Kenobi to show up and give them a light-saber, or when we are walking through the dark forests of our lives running from danger – who couldn’t do with the 7 dwarves showing up to give you shelter and safety as they did with Snow White? When you’re out on your scariest, out-of-your-comfort-zone stretches in life, like Dorthy in the Wizard of Oz, have you noticed how people show up along your path to give you clues, advice, and heart? Have you noticed that people show up to walk your path with you, like the Lion, the Tin Man or the Scarcrow? Stay tuned because it’s important to realize and acknowledge how much we need other people and  how important it is for us to show up for them as well.

             When I was 16 my parents and I got in a fight. The final shake out was a ultimatum – follow the rules or find someplace else to live. I moved out. I moved to Southern California with my aunt and uncle and therein started a type of mentor relationship with my Aunt Katie.  When I moved to California I was frustrated at not being trusted and not being listened to at home. I was coming from a really good home with really strict rules, and the big fight in question happened because I tried to do my laundry on Sunday – and that was a no-no. I, as the hero in this story, was on a journey of growing up. I knew what I wanted, where I wanted to be, how I wanted to do things and I certainly didn’t need shackles and restrictions or other people’s ideas of how to do things. Heck I was 16 years old and had it figured out. No really. I did. So, when I moved to Orange County California and my aunt listened to me, treated me like an adult, wore cool clothes and did cool things I felt excited with new possibilities. She was wise and we would talk about real life. That was new. She gave good advice but didn’t push me. She gave me the gifts of shelter, food, ideas and respect that this little hero needed at this stage of her story. I went back home after spending a summer at the beach and working at the local theatre and I was further along my hero’s journey because a woman who would prove to be my mentor in many ways and for many years showed up at that crossroads.

             Who are the mentors in your life? Can you think of them right off the bat? If not, here are a couple leading ideas…. The mentor character is the person who teaches, protects and gives the hero gifts along their path. Mentors often seem endowed with divine wisdom – they say the right thing at the right time.  Think Merlin guiding King Arthur, or in my interview with the Kjars a couple weeks back they talked about Jodie Moore, their life coach podcaster telling them ‘not to hold back’ and those words being key in their decision to sell their home and travel the country. Who have been your teachers or trainers?

             Another primary function of a mentor is as a donor or provider – one who temporarily provides the hero with some type of gift, a magic weapon, a clue, medicine, food, advice, a key. In the Hunger Games Hamich played the mentor role, bringing Katniss the silver pods that would parachute down with the gift she needed at the time. As is common with this aspect of story, the hero usually must do something to earn the gift – past a test, be kind along their path, in the case of the Hunger Games, Katniss had to convince the masses that she was in love with Peeta before Hamich would give her the medicines or healing balms she needed in the games. Can you recall the people along your life journey who suggest just the right book, or the right podcast. Maybe they bring you something you need very much but you didn’t even know you needed it.

             Last week my neighbor came over to see what the big mess on my lawn was about. I told him the story about the contractor I had hired to seal my foundation cutting my main sprinkler lines, taking the money and refusing to finish the work thus leaving my lawn dying and the front of my house a mess. He looked at me and said “that’s what I do ya know…. I’ve worked with sprinkler systems for 25 years. Let me take a look at it.” He then proceeded to pull parts and pieces from his truck and an hour and a half later my main sprinkler line was in working order and I could try to revive my ailing lawn. He wouldn’t take any payment. Now, that’s a mentor. He came, he provided a gift I dearly needed, and he relieved an anxiety that had me totally held up on this part of my path.

             Mentors also show up just at the right time – Cinderella’s fairy godmother showed up just in time to get her to the ball.  A few week’s back in my interview with Mark Shurtleff he talked about a time things got bad enough, that he thought about ending it all, jumping into the subway train, but just at that moment a dear friend called and ended up saving his life. Thank God for the people listening to the promptings and intuitions to make a call, show up, and reach out.

             One of the reasons I think this topic merits a discussion, is because those mentors who show up and give us insight, who gift us with just what we need in the moment, who help us overcome fear and anxiety in our places of struggle, these are the magic folks. These are our fairy godmothers and fairy godfathers. These are the people that deserve a thank you note, a hug, a dinner, an acknowledgement. If you’re behind in sharing your gratitude with the mentors in your life, let me launch your challenge for the week. Make a list of all the mentors you can remember who have inspired, gifted, guided and showed up for you, and let them know the difference they have made for you. Let them know how much they mean and meant. You can never give too much appreciation and no one deserves it more than those people who light our paths so we can move forward. Those people with the magic words.

             Another role of the mentor is to motivate the hero along their path. Who motivates you? Who helps you overcome your fear of moving forward into whatever life adventure awaits? Has anyone had to kick you in the butt, throw you in the pool of life, push you a little to get you out of your fear space or your stubborn space, or your self-doubt space? That’s a mentor. Have you seen the movie Forever Strong? The rugby coach guiding the delinquent high schooler. Another great movie – if you haven’t seen it, I recommend it. It’s about a champion high school rugby team that succeeds because their coach is about guiding them by the highest principles, not only in the game, but also in their lives. The clean living, the commitment to team, the honesty in school and dealings with others creates a space of exceptional power. Highland Rugby’s 35-year varsity record (1976–2012) is 419 wins and 10 losses, including 19 USA Rugby national championships in the 26 years USA Rugby sponsored a national championship. This was possible because of a man who mentored day after day, year after year, guiding heroes into their highest selves.

             Another role of the Mentor is to teach specific skills. In Greek Mythology the gods were often tutoring their favorites in wrestling, horsemanship, archery, weapons-handling, etc.  Who has taught you?

             What about a mentor as the protector. Think Dumbledore guiding Harry Potter. He was often Harry’s protector, removed as he was. Who in your life watches over you – actively or from a distance?

             We all have a series of mentors in our stories. We learn from siblings from parents, from our friends, teacher, lovers, role-models, people we work with, neighbors, therapists, it could be anyone….in fact sometimes the mentor role is filled by someone who is young, or by someone who has made the big mistakes  so others can learn what NOT to do from them.

             We also fill the role as mentors in other’s live as we do what we do… parent, teach, love, and listen to the spirit or intuition – whatever you call it – that guides you to be in the right place at the right time for someone else. Do you want to be the one at the cross roads handing out the magic elixir just when it’s needed most? Do you want to share wisdom, teach, guide? Do you want to protect, donate, walk with someone down their yellow brick road? Guess what? You already do! But, there’s no harm in paying closer attention to your intuition, to the spirit that prompts you to do something unexpected.  There’s great good in looking for ways to lift and protect each other. I think that most of the time we have no idea who we will touch or how we will make an impact. It just comes down to caring, listening, using your gifts and talents, and then things just come together. There is something about the magic of our life stories, and maybe the orchestration of angels,  that somehow the right things, ideas, books, people and magic elixir finds its way to us.

             Thanks for being the mentors you are in your world. Thanks for being here today, and don’t forget the challenge to show appreciation to your mentors this week.

             Loveyourstorypodcast.com has all the podcast episodes as well as story tools to help you  create your best life story – the on-line course: the 5 steps to reframing your past stories that hold you back, as well as the 21-Day LIFE Connection challenge that gives you a new tool for creating connection and possibility in your life story ever day for 3 weeks.  You can find them all on the website.

             Thanks for being here, we’ll see you next week for the next episode of the Love Your Story podcast.

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3730Wed, 15 Aug 2018 09:00:57 -070018:00falsefullYou’ll want to tune in today because nobody does this thing called LIFE on their own. We need each other. It’s why the MENTOR is such an important archetype in the story formula and in the stories of our lives. Today we’re going to start a discussion about those special people who show up at the crossroads for us, about the wise who give us sage advice, about the moments those mentors gift us with the perfect magic elixir we need in the moment, and about how we also play that most important role in the lives of the people in our story.Lori LeeEpisode 99 Interview with Dan Davis: Stories that StirEpisode 99 Interview with Dan Davis: Stories that Stir

             Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast. It’s a beautiful summer day for creating fabulous moments in your life story, so let’s get a little inspiration for doing something that your future self will thank you for.

             Today I have Dan Davis, the owner, and creator of Stiry – stories that stir, with me today. He and his team have told video stories of over 60 individuals and organizations from around the world. From the everyday Joe to the billion dollar CEO, each and every story is a journey of discovery.

             Stay tuned for a peek at his story and the process he’s learned for peeling back the layers of living to discover your own story and the realization that your life is more than just a list of chronological events. This is about changing the world.

             Dan Davis has run a variety of multi-million dollar companies in various industries. He’s worked in sports marketing, film production, healthcare, and digital marketing. He’s currently the CEO of Stiry, a video storytelling platform used to help people discover their full potential through stories that move you.

             Tune in to the audio program for the interview.

             For more information and to contact Dan:

             dan@stiry.com

             www.stiry.com

             facebook.com/stiry,

             instagram:@stiryofficial

             Youtube: Stiry

             ]]>Episode 99 Interview with Dan Davis: Stories that Stir

             Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast. It’s a beautiful summer day for creating fabulous moments in your life story, so let’s get a little inspiration for doing something that your future self will thank you for.

             Today I have Dan Davis, the owner, and creator of Stiry – stories that stir, with me today. He and his team have told video stories of over 60 individuals and organizations from around the world. From the everyday Joe to the billion dollar CEO, each and every story is a journey of discovery.

             Stay tuned for a peek at his story and the process he’s learned for peeling back the layers of living to discover your own story and the realization that your life is more than just a list of chronological events. This is about changing the world.

             Dan Davis has run a variety of multi-million dollar companies in various industries. He’s worked in sports marketing, film production, healthcare, and digital marketing. He’s currently the CEO of Stiry, a video storytelling platform used to help people discover their full potential through stories that move you.

             Tune in to the audio program for the interview.

             For more information and to contact Dan:

             dan@stiry.com

             www.stiry.com

             facebook.com/stiry,

             instagram:@stiryofficial

             Youtube: Stiry

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3606Wed, 08 Aug 2018 09:00:27 -070041:07falsefullToday I have Dan Davis, the owner and creator of Stiry – stories that stir, with me today. He and his team have told video stories of over 60 individuals and organizations from around the world. From the everyday Joe to the billion dollar CEO, each and every story is a journey of discovery. We get a peak at his story, unemployement, selectively coming up with the right path, and the process he’s learned for peeling back the layers of living to discover your own story and the realization that your life is more than just a list of chronological events. We talk about faith, courage, and creating your life on purpose.Lori LeeEpisode 98 Interview Talie Davis Weir: Uncovering and Acknowledging the Masterpiece You Already AreEpisode 98 Interview Talie Davis Weir:

             Uncovering and Acknowledging the Masterpiece You Already Are

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast! Where I get to interview people with amazing life stories; where we discuss tools for living our best life stories, and really often we get both at the same time. Like today! Today I bring you Talie Davis Weir from Ohio. She is a life and personal development coach that focuses on empowering leaders to create profound impact centered in JOY. I have met Talie and worked with her and she truly impersonates that JOY. She is a mom, a ballroom dancer, and a leader of retreats, but the reason I’ve asked her on the show today is that she has a really interesting life story that involves living in a religious commune, separating out of that community, divorcing her minister husband and making her way into a life of purposeful creation.

             Stay tuned for her story AND some tips on mindset, joy regardless of circumstances, and a few inside coaching tips from her.

             Tune in to the audio program for our discussion.

             To contact or get more information on Talie:

             Instagram: coachingwithtalie

             Facebook: www.facebook.com/coachingwithtalie

             Text morningsalive to 48421

              

             ]]>Episode 98 Interview Talie Davis Weir:

             Uncovering and Acknowledging the Masterpiece You Already Are

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast! Where I get to interview people with amazing life stories; where we discuss tools for living our best life stories, and really often we get both at the same time. Like today! Today I bring you Talie Davis Weir from Ohio. She is a life and personal development coach that focuses on empowering leaders to create profound impact centered in JOY. I have met Talie and worked with her and she truly impersonates that JOY. She is a mom, a ballroom dancer, and a leader of retreats, but the reason I’ve asked her on the show today is that she has a really interesting life story that involves living in a religious commune, separating out of that community, divorcing her minister husband and making her way into a life of purposeful creation.

             Stay tuned for her story AND some tips on mindset, joy regardless of circumstances, and a few inside coaching tips from her.

             Tune in to the audio program for our discussion.

             To contact or get more information on Talie:

             Instagram: coachingwithtalie

             Facebook: www.facebook.com/coachingwithtalie

             Text morningsalive to 48421

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3601Wed, 01 Aug 2018 09:00:45 -070046:31falsefullWelcome to the Love Your Story podcast! Where I get to interview people with amazing life stories. Where we discuss tools for living our best life stories, and really often we get both at the same time. Today I bring you Talie Davis Weir from Ohio. She is a life and personal development coach that focuses on empowering leaders to create profound impact centered in JOY. The reason I’ve asked her on the show today is that she has a really interesting life story that involves living in a religious commune, separating out of that community, divorcing her minister husband and making her way into a life of purposeful creation. Listen in for thoughts on removing our masks and recognizing the masterpiece you are.Lori LeeEpisode 97 Interview with the von Niederhauserns: Living and Giving on Your Own TermsEpisode 97 Interview with the von Niederhauserns: Family Humanitarian

             “Excitement and Fear are the Same Feeling.”

              

             The vonNiederhausern family consists of Rachel the mother, Steve the father and six children ages 14 – 4 months. Steve and Rachel have a very powerful way of living – on purpose. They say that sometimes it feels a little weird to buck the cultural norms of not owning a house and putting down roots, but instead of using their money to buy cars and a house and eating out regularly, as much of America does, Steve bikes to work, Rachel bargain shops, they rent a basement in a home in a good neighborhood, and they homeschool their kids.

             They then turn around and put all their money into a project called Family Humanitarian where they travel to Africa and South America to help the poor across the world by helping them create better living conditions. This they do with all their kids in tow, and other families as well.  We’ll hear their story, and also a little about how their lifestyle and Steve’s savvy with social media has garnered them 50,000 plus followers on Instagram where it caught the attention of Royal Caribbean Cruise lines and turned into a partnership of cruising the Caribbean on the cruise line’s dime, sharing with their followers a story of creating an unorthodox life, on purpose.

             Tune in to the podcast for my interview with the Von Neiderhauserns and their stories of how and why they started Family Humanitarian, what that looks like, and some thoughts on the poverty and wealth matrix.

             For more information about the von Niederhauser’s:

             @thevonfamily

             familyhumanitarian.org

             cacheloavesandfishes.org

             Thanks for being here today for a dose of love your story and how service changes lives.

              

             ]]>Episode 97 Interview with the von Niederhauserns: Family Humanitarian

             “Excitement and Fear are the Same Feeling.”

              

             The vonNiederhausern family consists of Rachel the mother, Steve the father and six children ages 14 – 4 months. Steve and Rachel have a very powerful way of living – on purpose. They say that sometimes it feels a little weird to buck the cultural norms of not owning a house and putting down roots, but instead of using their money to buy cars and a house and eating out regularly, as much of America does, Steve bikes to work, Rachel bargain shops, they rent a basement in a home in a good neighborhood, and they homeschool their kids.

             They then turn around and put all their money into a project called Family Humanitarian where they travel to Africa and South America to help the poor across the world by helping them create better living conditions. This they do with all their kids in tow, and other families as well.  We’ll hear their story, and also a little about how their lifestyle and Steve’s savvy with social media has garnered them 50,000 plus followers on Instagram where it caught the attention of Royal Caribbean Cruise lines and turned into a partnership of cruising the Caribbean on the cruise line’s dime, sharing with their followers a story of creating an unorthodox life, on purpose.

             Tune in to the podcast for my interview with the Von Neiderhauserns and their stories of how and why they started Family Humanitarian, what that looks like, and some thoughts on the poverty and wealth matrix.

             For more information about the von Niederhauser’s:

             @thevonfamily

             familyhumanitarian.org

             cacheloavesandfishes.org

             Thanks for being here today for a dose of love your story and how service changes lives.

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3532Wed, 25 Jul 2018 09:00:30 -070037:05falsefullThe VonNeiderhausern family consists of Rachel the mother, Steve the father and six children ages 14 – 4 months. Steve and Rachel have a very powerful way of living – on purpose. They say that sometimes it feels a little weird to buck the cultural norms of not owning a house and putting down roots, but instead of using their money to buy cars and a house and eating out regularly, as much of America does, Steve bikes to work, Rachel bargain shops, they rent a basement in a home in a good neighborhood, and they homeschool their kids.<br /> <br /> They then turn around and put all their money into a project called Family Humanitarian where they travel to Africa and South America to help the poor across the world by helping them create better living conditions. This they do with all their kids in tow. Tune in for their story and thoughts on the wealth and poverty matrix.Lori LeeEpisode 96 Interview with Mark Shurtleff: A Tornado of Trials – When the Other Shoe DropsEpisode 96 Interview with Mark Shurtleff: A Tornado of Trails – When the Other Shoe Drops

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today you are joining me for an interview with Mark Shurtleff the former three term Utah Attorney General. He is the founder of Shurtleff Consulting Group and Law Firm, and the owner of the Commercial clean energy project development company. He is the author of a historical novel Am I Not a Man? The Dred Scott Story and a former U.S. Naval Officer. He also is the father of five children and has 8 grandchildren.

             I’ve invited Mark on the show today because that little intro doesn’t even skim the surface of his story. In June of 2014 Mark was charged with bribery and corruption charges as the Attorney General. His home was raided by the FBI and as the next two years evolved until the criminal case was dismissed in July of 2016 there was quite an ordeal. If that’s not enough his story also involves a devastating motorcycle accident that involved 15 surgeries and a fight against cancer.

             Our discussion today is not about politics. Our discussion today is about the human side of struggle. About the story from Mark, on the inside. The hero of a story always has two journeys – the outward journey that involves the milestones and the outer struggles – the mountains to climb, the obstacles to overcome, but it also involves an inner journey of emotion, mental fortitude and failure, struggle = and sometimes that’s the bigger story. So, stay tuned as we get the inside story from Mark Shurtleff

             Tune into the audio program for the interview with Mark Shurtleff. For more information or to follow Mark:

             FB: Mark Shurtleff

             Twitter: @markshurtleff

             IG: Mark Shurtleff

             LinkedIn: Mark L. Shurtleff

             www.shurtlefflawfirm.com

              

             Adversity comes to each of us in different packages. Regardless of where others feel we stand – whether you feel Mark is right or wrong for sueing the state, for example, the adversity, his adversity is a tale that we can all relate with in our own way. It’s a tale of deep struggle. The things I take away from this discussion are:

             Thanks for joining us today – Love Your Story is about inspiring and empowering each of you wonderful listeners to find the strength to live your best story. I have provided tools on the website for reframing your past stories that are holding you back – a 5 part course you can sign up for. And, I have also created the 21-Day Life Connection Challenge that gives you 21 new tools – 1 a day for creating more connection and possibility in your life story as you move forward creating what you want on purpose. Please join us on FB in the Love Your Story Groupies FB page where we are sharing stories, notes on the podcasts we like, sharing the 21-Day Challenge together. Join us! Love to have you on

             ]]>Episode 96 Interview with Mark Shurtleff: A Tornado of Trails – When the Other Shoe Drops

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today you are joining me for an interview with Mark Shurtleff the former three term Utah Attorney General. He is the founder of Shurtleff Consulting Group and Law Firm, and the owner of the Commercial clean energy project development company. He is the author of a historical novel Am I Not a Man? The Dred Scott Story and a former U.S. Naval Officer. He also is the father of five children and has 8 grandchildren.

             I’ve invited Mark on the show today because that little intro doesn’t even skim the surface of his story. In June of 2014 Mark was charged with bribery and corruption charges as the Attorney General. His home was raided by the FBI and as the next two years evolved until the criminal case was dismissed in July of 2016 there was quite an ordeal. If that’s not enough his story also involves a devastating motorcycle accident that involved 15 surgeries and a fight against cancer.

             Our discussion today is not about politics. Our discussion today is about the human side of struggle. About the story from Mark, on the inside. The hero of a story always has two journeys – the outward journey that involves the milestones and the outer struggles – the mountains to climb, the obstacles to overcome, but it also involves an inner journey of emotion, mental fortitude and failure, struggle = and sometimes that’s the bigger story. So, stay tuned as we get the inside story from Mark Shurtleff

             Tune into the audio program for the interview with Mark Shurtleff. For more information or to follow Mark:

             FB: Mark Shurtleff

             Twitter: @markshurtleff

             IG: Mark Shurtleff

             LinkedIn: Mark L. Shurtleff

             www.shurtlefflawfirm.com

              

             Adversity comes to each of us in different packages. Regardless of where others feel we stand – whether you feel Mark is right or wrong for sueing the state, for example, the adversity, his adversity is a tale that we can all relate with in our own way. It’s a tale of deep struggle. The things I take away from this discussion are:

             Thanks for joining us today – Love Your Story is about inspiring and empowering each of you wonderful listeners to find the strength to live your best story. I have provided tools on the website for reframing your past stories that are holding you back – a 5 part course you can sign up for. And, I have also created the 21-Day Life Connection Challenge that gives you 21 new tools – 1 a day for creating more connection and possibility in your life story as you move forward creating what you want on purpose. Please join us on FB in the Love Your Story Groupies FB page where we are sharing stories, notes on the podcasts we like, sharing the 21-Day Challenge together. Join us! Love to have you on

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3470Wed, 18 Jul 2018 09:00:25 -070048:14falsefullToday you are joining me for an interview with Mark Shurtleff the former three term Utah Attorney General. In June of 2014 Mark was charged with bribery and corruption charges as the Attorney General. His home was raided by the FBI and as the next two years evolved until the criminal case was dismissed in July of 2016 there was quite an ordeal. If that’s not enough his story also involves a devastating motorcycle accident that involved 15 surgeries and a fight against cancer. Our discussion today is not about politics. Our discussion today is about the human side of struggle.Lori LeeEpisode 95 The BAD-ASS BROADEpisode 95 The Bad-Ass Broad

             Link to Stephanie’s site and this post:  https://stephaniestclaire.com/the-bad-ass-broad/

             The Bad Ass Broad

             By Stephanie St. Claire

             Sometimes life requires you to be a bad ass broad. As in, take a look at the craziness surrounding you, pull that shit together, and HANDLE IT.

             Who is the Bad Ass Broad?

             She doesn’t tolerate drama, whether it’s her own or another’s. She lives in the real world, so there is always going to be craziness to contend with. But she recognizes it early and excuses herself from the scene.

             She’s self-possessed and commands her space in the room. Her confidence is strong but quiet. She’s not a loud mouth. She takes a compliment and looks you in the eye when you’re giving it.

             She’s an observer more than a talker, acutely aware of her surroundings. She uses the information to her advantage.

             She doesn’t talk badly about other people, and while that sounds really angelic, she knows it will be traced right back to her and prizes her hard-earned credibility.

             She enjoys a good stiff drink, but never forgets that the sun will rise tomorrow and require her full strength and sobriety.

             She’s not threatened by other women. As a matter of fact, she’s the first to tell a stranger how pretty she looks, or congratulate a friend on her new promotion. She feels energized by other women’s successes.

             A bad ass broad does not get involved with someone else’s man. Period. End of story. She has a memory of how that went down and has learned from her mistakes.

             The fiercest thing about a bad ass broad is her ability to extricate herself from a situation that isn’t working.

             Once aware of her mistake, she will snap her wallet closed, snap her knees together, snap her heart out of hypnosis and head out with a swiftness that will suck the very oxygen from your lungs.

              

             
             She is discerning about what comes out of her mouth. She doesn’t blab about family drama, new beaus, possible layoffs, or her own marriage issues. She has a few confidants, and they’ve earned her trust. She waits things out to see how they will settle before she goes into details with the general public. She knows she will rise above any situation and has no interest in ruining the reputations of others.

             A bad ass broad is not afraid of hard work. She rolls up her sleeves and gets to it. She doesn’t bitch about it, and she doesn’t wait for someone else to do it. She doesn’t let herself get distracted and is very aware that resistance is a cunning enemy. Resistance being: fear, self-doubt, procrastination, addiction, distraction, narcissism, self-loathing, and perfectionism.

             A bad ass broad is not a loud mouth, gossip, or a bitch. She doesn’t throw her weight around, get loud and demanding, or act like she’s better than everyone. She lets her actions speak for themselves, which saves her of a bunch of vapid talking.

             A bad ass broad values freedom, and sometimes does things unconventionally to afford her the highest measure of it.

             She takes big risks because she is willing to be her own rescue if things don’t work out. She has survived numerous personal plot twists and can take what’s handed to her without blaming others.

             A bad ass broad is MADE, not born. She’s a sinner with the heart of a saint. She’s been trespassed against, and she’s done some trespassing of her own. But at some point, she drew a line in the sand, stopped the drama, and took back the wheel.

             She’s in charge of her life. She can take the heat. She handles business.

              

             Touring the facility and picking up slack,

             Episode 95 The Bad-Ass Broad

             Link to Stephanie’s site and this post:  https://stephaniestclaire.com/the-bad-ass-broad/

             The Bad Ass Broad

             By Stephanie St. Claire

             Sometimes life requires you to be a bad ass broad. As in, take a look at the craziness surrounding you, pull that shit together, and HANDLE IT.

             Who is the Bad Ass Broad?

             She doesn’t tolerate drama, whether it’s her own or another’s. She lives in the real world, so there is always going to be craziness to contend with. But she recognizes it early and excuses herself from the scene.

             She’s self-possessed and commands her space in the room. Her confidence is strong but quiet. She’s not a loud mouth. She takes a compliment and looks you in the eye when you’re giving it.

             She’s an observer more than a talker, acutely aware of her surroundings. She uses the information to her advantage.

             She doesn’t talk badly about other people, and while that sounds really angelic, she knows it will be traced right back to her and prizes her hard-earned credibility.

             She enjoys a good stiff drink, but never forgets that the sun will rise tomorrow and require her full strength and sobriety.

             She’s not threatened by other women. As a matter of fact, she’s the first to tell a stranger how pretty she looks, or congratulate a friend on her new promotion. She feels energized by other women’s successes.

             A bad ass broad does not get involved with someone else’s man. Period. End of story. She has a memory of how that went down and has learned from her mistakes.

             The fiercest thing about a bad ass broad is her ability to extricate herself from a situation that isn’t working.

             Once aware of her mistake, she will snap her wallet closed, snap her knees together, snap her heart out of hypnosis and head out with a swiftness that will suck the very oxygen from your lungs.

              

             
             She is discerning about what comes out of her mouth. She doesn’t blab about family drama, new beaus, possible layoffs, or her own marriage issues. She has a few confidants, and they’ve earned her trust. She waits things out to see how they will settle before she goes into details with the general public. She knows she will rise above any situation and has no interest in ruining the reputations of others.

             A bad ass broad is not afraid of hard work. She rolls up her sleeves and gets to it. She doesn’t bitch about it, and she doesn’t wait for someone else to do it. She doesn’t let herself get distracted and is very aware that resistance is a cunning enemy. Resistance being: fear, self-doubt, procrastination, addiction, distraction, narcissism, self-loathing, and perfectionism.

             A bad ass broad is not a loud mouth, gossip, or a bitch. She doesn’t throw her weight around, get loud and demanding, or act like she’s better than everyone. She lets her actions speak for themselves, which saves her of a bunch of vapid talking.

             A bad ass broad values freedom, and sometimes does things unconventionally to afford her the highest measure of it.

             She takes big risks because she is willing to be her own rescue if things don’t work out. She has survived numerous personal plot twists and can take what’s handed to her without blaming others.

             A bad ass broad is MADE, not born. She’s a sinner with the heart of a saint. She’s been trespassed against, and she’s done some trespassing of her own. But at some point, she drew a line in the sand, stopped the drama, and took back the wheel.

             She’s in charge of her life. She can take the heat. She handles business.

              

             Touring the facility and picking up slack,

             

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3376Wed, 11 Jul 2018 09:00:32 -070007:54falsefullStephanie St Clair wrote a blog post called the Bad Ass Broad. It has received a lot of attention and downloads, but when I read it I liked it because there were so many powerful statements that I either connected with or wanted to embody. Today's episode is a short reading of this blog post. Listen in for a little inspiration about what a bad ass broad looks like and lives like.Lori LeeEpisode 94 Interview with Tabitha Trent: We Can Do Hard ThingsEpisode 94 Interview with Tabitha Trent: We Can Do Hard Things

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. You are tuning in today for the story of Tabitha Trent – a young married woman with a 2-year-old daughter who was diagnosed with stage III Colon Cancer in January 2017.

             Let me share a couple reasons I’m doing this interview: first, there is probably not a soul out there that hasn’t either had cancer or known someone who has. It’s an epidemic in our modern world – my grandmother died of cancer, my mother fought breast cancer, my son has leukemia, I have another friend who has fought phenomenally hard for years but doesn’t have much time left. I’m sure you have a similar list. Second, Tabitha, from the beginning has been very open about her journey. She aligned herself with the Colorectal Cancer Alliance and volunteered in their buddy program. She’s been open from the beginning so that her journey could help others with questions or fears about the process of battling cancer.  She has proactively shared her story of grit. And third, because her advocacy and choice to shift her mindset from one of fear and denial to positivity and supporting others who were going through this as she was, gives us a story of one woman’s choice to create something powerful from something horrible.

             Stay tuned for her story and listen in on her amazing and inspirational attitude.

             Tune into the podcast for my interview with Tabitha

             Contact information for Tabitha:

             Social media tags and websites  – www.linkedin.com/in/tabtherecruiter and #TabTheRecruiter

              

             Our realities are a creation of our mindset. I know it’s hard to take that full responsibility, especially when things kick our feet out from under us. Sometimes it’s hard for me to control my mindset – I get it. And, I would never suggest that everyone who gets a horrible disease should simply bounce up and away and shift their mindset into power and positivity, because there is certainly a time for mourning, for fear, for anger, for all the other emotions that are such a big part of illness, especially terminal illness. You are totally justified to feel all those emotions and more. But stories like Tabitha’s show us that the fear and anger, the horror and depression don’t have to be where we stay. There is a choice to shift into brighter spaces. For those of you who want another option – the option of finding power and positive and getting real with your grit – here’s a story of someone who has done just that.

             Thanks for joining us for her story today.

             As I sign off I want to invite you to join the Love Your Story Podcast Groupies Facebook page and be a part of our community. We are going to be doing groups from that community who are doing the 21-Day LIFE Connection Challenge together, so you guys can do it in a group and talk about your experiences there in the community. I’d love to have everyone listening right now join that community, and if you want to join the next group of 21-Day LIFE Connection Challengers, just type it on the page or message me and I’ll be in touch about when the next group is starting. Check it out for more info on loveyourstorypodcast.com.

              

             See you next week for another inspiring story or tool on making your life story fabulous!

             ]]>Episode 94 Interview with Tabitha Trent: We Can Do Hard Things

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. You are tuning in today for the story of Tabitha Trent – a young married woman with a 2-year-old daughter who was diagnosed with stage III Colon Cancer in January 2017.

             Let me share a couple reasons I’m doing this interview: first, there is probably not a soul out there that hasn’t either had cancer or known someone who has. It’s an epidemic in our modern world – my grandmother died of cancer, my mother fought breast cancer, my son has leukemia, I have another friend who has fought phenomenally hard for years but doesn’t have much time left. I’m sure you have a similar list. Second, Tabitha, from the beginning has been very open about her journey. She aligned herself with the Colorectal Cancer Alliance and volunteered in their buddy program. She’s been open from the beginning so that her journey could help others with questions or fears about the process of battling cancer.  She has proactively shared her story of grit. And third, because her advocacy and choice to shift her mindset from one of fear and denial to positivity and supporting others who were going through this as she was, gives us a story of one woman’s choice to create something powerful from something horrible.

             Stay tuned for her story and listen in on her amazing and inspirational attitude.

             Tune into the podcast for my interview with Tabitha

             Contact information for Tabitha:

             Social media tags and websites  – www.linkedin.com/in/tabtherecruiter and #TabTheRecruiter

              

             Our realities are a creation of our mindset. I know it’s hard to take that full responsibility, especially when things kick our feet out from under us. Sometimes it’s hard for me to control my mindset – I get it. And, I would never suggest that everyone who gets a horrible disease should simply bounce up and away and shift their mindset into power and positivity, because there is certainly a time for mourning, for fear, for anger, for all the other emotions that are such a big part of illness, especially terminal illness. You are totally justified to feel all those emotions and more. But stories like Tabitha’s show us that the fear and anger, the horror and depression don’t have to be where we stay. There is a choice to shift into brighter spaces. For those of you who want another option – the option of finding power and positive and getting real with your grit – here’s a story of someone who has done just that.

             Thanks for joining us for her story today.

             As I sign off I want to invite you to join the Love Your Story Podcast Groupies Facebook page and be a part of our community. We are going to be doing groups from that community who are doing the 21-Day LIFE Connection Challenge together, so you guys can do it in a group and talk about your experiences there in the community. I’d love to have everyone listening right now join that community, and if you want to join the next group of 21-Day LIFE Connection Challengers, just type it on the page or message me and I’ll be in touch about when the next group is starting. Check it out for more info on loveyourstorypodcast.com.

              

             See you next week for another inspiring story or tool on making your life story fabulous!

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3346Wed, 04 Jul 2018 09:00:33 -070039:20falsefullYou are tuning in today for the story of Tabitha Trent – a young married woman with a 2-year-old daughter who was diagnosed with stage III Colon Cancer in January 2017. We talk about her journey of finding your grit, doing hard things, and helping others along the way. We've all been touched by cancer in one way or another. Here is a woman willing to share her story of battle and bravery.Lori LeeEpisode 93 What is a Herald? Who or What is Calling You into the Great Adventures of Your Life?Episode 93 What is a Herald?

             Who or What is Calling You into the Great Adventures of Your Life?

              

             Welcome back to the Love Your Story Podcast. Today we are picking up the story archetype discussion – specifically the archetype of the Herald. Remember in episode 72 when we talked about the Threshold Guardian and the things that test us to see how badly we want what we think we want? Well, today we are going to dig into the Herald archetype. Stay tuned for a look at who your heralds are and the invitation they are bringing, and why you should probably say “yes.”

             Joseph Campbell, in his book The Hero of a Thousand Faces, posited that the most popular stories over millennia and across cultures, share a specific formula– the heroes journey. You have consumed this “monomyth” in pop culture classics like Star Wars, the Matrix, Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, to name only a few.

             The Hero’s Journey has a specific plot structure, but it also has a repeating cast of characters, known as character archetypes. Archetypes tell us the role a character plays in the story. Thinking about the characters in your story – or the people in your story as these pivotal characters adds a bit of a perspective shift that often provides clarity in your story, but most of all, when you look closely the archetypes of story provide the handbook for life, an instruction manual on the art of human stories and creating and recognizing your own hero’s journey. If nothing else it’s very interesting to consider the things that challenge you as threshold guardians, the people in your life who invite you into adventure and new ways as heralds, and the villains we face as shadows of our own possible dark side.

             The central archetypal cast of the Heroes Journey fall into one of these eight character roles: Hero, Mentor, Ally, Herald, Trickster, Threshold Guardian, Shape Shifter, Villain or Shadow.

             Today I want to talk about the Herald.

             According to the definition on Mythcreants – Fantasy and Science Fiction for Story Tellers, “The Herald appears near the beginning to announce the need for change in the hero’s life. They are the catalyst that sets the whole adventure in motion. While they often bring news of a threat in a distant land, they can also simply show a dissatisfied hero a tempting glimpse of a new life. Occasionally they single the hero out, picking them for a journey they wouldn’t otherwise take.”

             Why do we care who the heralds are in our stories? I don’t know, maybe you don’t, but the reason I do is because they are key players in the directions we head in our lives. They may be in the script for a very short moment, but the role they play is incredibly significant, and that merits at least a 15-minute conversation. And, personally, once I have identified the heralds in my own story they take on a pedestal place in my book because they are the catalysts, the instigators for my greatest pivotal events. They opened the doors to adventure. Life is one big journey, and within it we take lots of different kinds of journeys – we take emotional journeys, we take learning journeys, we take professional journeys and journey through relationships. We take literal journeys filled with travel and adventure, and the heralds who extend those invitations, who show me the door, well, they have a special place in my heart.

             The great stories begin with the “call to adventure.” The human spirit is born to explore and grow, and change is happening to us all the time, but often it is our choice as to whether or not we accept the invitation. We have to act when the Herald shows up.

             Let’s talk about some heralds we are all familiar with from pop-culture: R2D2 brought the message of Princess Leah that started Luke on the journey of his life.  The letter announcing the ball in the Cinderella story opened a door to...]]>Episode 93 What is a Herald?

             Who or What is Calling You into the Great Adventures of Your Life?

              

             Welcome back to the Love Your Story Podcast. Today we are picking up the story archetype discussion – specifically the archetype of the Herald. Remember in episode 72 when we talked about the Threshold Guardian and the things that test us to see how badly we want what we think we want? Well, today we are going to dig into the Herald archetype. Stay tuned for a look at who your heralds are and the invitation they are bringing, and why you should probably say “yes.”

             Joseph Campbell, in his book The Hero of a Thousand Faces, posited that the most popular stories over millennia and across cultures, share a specific formula– the heroes journey. You have consumed this “monomyth” in pop culture classics like Star Wars, the Matrix, Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, to name only a few.

             The Hero’s Journey has a specific plot structure, but it also has a repeating cast of characters, known as character archetypes. Archetypes tell us the role a character plays in the story. Thinking about the characters in your story – or the people in your story as these pivotal characters adds a bit of a perspective shift that often provides clarity in your story, but most of all, when you look closely the archetypes of story provide the handbook for life, an instruction manual on the art of human stories and creating and recognizing your own hero’s journey. If nothing else it’s very interesting to consider the things that challenge you as threshold guardians, the people in your life who invite you into adventure and new ways as heralds, and the villains we face as shadows of our own possible dark side.

             The central archetypal cast of the Heroes Journey fall into one of these eight character roles: Hero, Mentor, Ally, Herald, Trickster, Threshold Guardian, Shape Shifter, Villain or Shadow.

             Today I want to talk about the Herald.

             According to the definition on Mythcreants – Fantasy and Science Fiction for Story Tellers, “The Herald appears near the beginning to announce the need for change in the hero’s life. They are the catalyst that sets the whole adventure in motion. While they often bring news of a threat in a distant land, they can also simply show a dissatisfied hero a tempting glimpse of a new life. Occasionally they single the hero out, picking them for a journey they wouldn’t otherwise take.”

             Why do we care who the heralds are in our stories? I don’t know, maybe you don’t, but the reason I do is because they are key players in the directions we head in our lives. They may be in the script for a very short moment, but the role they play is incredibly significant, and that merits at least a 15-minute conversation. And, personally, once I have identified the heralds in my own story they take on a pedestal place in my book because they are the catalysts, the instigators for my greatest pivotal events. They opened the doors to adventure. Life is one big journey, and within it we take lots of different kinds of journeys – we take emotional journeys, we take learning journeys, we take professional journeys and journey through relationships. We take literal journeys filled with travel and adventure, and the heralds who extend those invitations, who show me the door, well, they have a special place in my heart.

             The great stories begin with the “call to adventure.” The human spirit is born to explore and grow, and change is happening to us all the time, but often it is our choice as to whether or not we accept the invitation. We have to act when the Herald shows up.

             Let’s talk about some heralds we are all familiar with from pop-culture: R2D2 brought the message of Princess Leah that started Luke on the journey of his life.  The letter announcing the ball in the Cinderella story opened a door to magic and happily ever after – yes a herald can be a letter calling you into the adventure. In the Hobbit, Gandolf invites Bilbo out onto the adventure from which he may not return alive, but in reality, the adventure ends up defining his entire life and legacy.

             In my own life, my friend Sally suggested I attend and invited me to embark on the emotional intelligence training that was very key to my healing. Very key to the creation of this podcast.  My friend Sandy was key in helping me find my way to my embarking on the journey of my masters program, teaching at Utah State, and ultimately adding one of the most important stepping stones into the path of my life.  I had a terrifying dream once, I woke in a cold sweat and sat straight up in bed, my back pressed against the headboard, looking out toward the door of my bedroom for hours, all lights on, 911 dialed into my phone and my finger next to the send button. This dream helped me realize how traumatized I was being with my second husband and began my journey to leave.

             I’d like to point out the obvious, if Cinderella had not decided to accept the invitation and fight to go to the ball, if Bilbo had said “no” to Gandalf, if Luke had ignored the plea of Princess Leah the stories we know would never have taken place, but more importantly to the characters (if they were real), the experiences those characters had would never have happened. Do you see what I’m getting at here? When you don’t say yes to the Herald you don’t have much of a story to tell.

             We talk all the time about creating your life story on purpose. We talk about choices and believing in self and possibility, we talk about action, but I know far too many people for whom heralds show up with calls to action and opportunity that include leaving the Shire or believing in the magic of faith, or creating a life outside their comfort zone, or embracing passion and love and they simply can’t do it/won’t do it. The fear of failure, the fear that they might make a mistake, the fear of the possibility of regret, the fear of the unknown freezes them into the lives they are already tired of.

             Have you seen the movie “Yes Man?” In it, Jim Carrey plays a character that promises to say YES to everything anyone asks him to do. It opens up massive opportunities for experiences, for learning, for a relationship. Of course, there is lots of humor, but the takeaway is how saying YES to life, YES to opportunity, YES to the unknown opens doors. While I’m not suggesting we all relinquish our ethical better judgment, I am suggesting that we cannot embark on the adventures of our lives if we ignore our heralds. When the invitation to adventure, or change, or the unknown calls us out, the rest of our life awaits. Will we say no and keep writing the same habitually dictated script, or will we say YES and head out on the yellow brick road, on the fight for the universe, will we go to the ball and see what magic happens?

             Nobody knows what lies ahead in the future. There is never a guarantee that the adventure you’re being called to will be filled with bliss – in fact, there is pretty much a guarantee that it won’t because that’s the nature of adventure. You still have to fight Darth Vader, you still have to brave the evil stepmother, you still have to fight trolls and dragons and your inner fears, but that’s the friggin story. That’s the story you’ll be telling when like Bilbo, you retell your story at the end of your life. What did you create with your YES and what did you miss with your NO?

             We’ve had a couple episodes where I spoke with the Kjar family and their choice to heed the call to sell their home, buy a mobile home, and hit all 50 states in 52 weeks with 4 kids in tow (See episode 45 & 61 if you want more on that story). I asked them not long ago if they regretted selling everything and now that it was almost over having to start all over, and the answer was a resounding NO. It was and is an adventure of a lifetime with so many experiences that have built out the beauty of the last year of their lives and the effect it will have on all of them in the years moving forward.  They said YES to the adventure, they took the road less traveled, and that has made all the difference.

             What if I hadn’t accepted Sally’s invitation to go to the emotional intelligence training that helped me heal my story. I wouldn’t be here doing this podcast. I doubt I would have found the healing I needed in the way I needed it. I certainly wouldn’t have experienced it the way I did. That’s a game changer for me. What if I hadn’t dared accept the call to embark on a master’s program that required me as a single mom supporting two sons to drive an hour and a half each way to the university every day, stay up until 3:00 am grading papers on a regular basis – I taught at the university also, doing research and homework constantly, presenting at other universities all while holding down a full-time job? Well, what absolutely seemed impossible became possible with all the magic and hard work that a real adventure takes. You too can embark on your own adventures, but that means you have to accept the invitation when the herald brings it.

             Is there something inside you that is pushing for change?

             Is there a friend or opportunity that is offering you a new experience, a new relationship, an adventure?

             Remember heralds can be letters, invites, dreams, people….watch for your calls to adventure.

             I’ll end with a quote from Joseph Campbell, “The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty  yes to your adventure.”

             Take action! When the herald proffers you the invite, consider the possibility, not the fear. Say YES to more than you say NO to. Answer the calls into your own life story. See you next week and your challenge for the week is to think about the heralds in your life. Who were they? What did they offer? Did you choose to accept the call? Where has that answer – whatever it was – landed you?

             See you next week on the next episode of Love Your Story. May you heed the calls into your best adventures.

             Share the podcast, leave us a review on iTunes, and go to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com to sign up for a couple important tools to help you create your best story: There is the 21-Day Challenge for living your best life story now; and the 5-Steps to Reframing past stories that hold you back. See you next week.

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3264Wed, 27 Jun 2018 09:00:24 -070016:41falsefullThe Hero's Journey has a specific plot structure, but it also has a repeating cast of characters, known as character archetypes. Archetypes tell us the role a character plays in the story. Thinking about the characters in your story – or the people in your story as these pivotal characters adds a bit of a perspective shift that often provides clarity in your story. Join us today as we talk about the Heralds in your story and what adventures they are calling you on. Let's consider if you are accepting those calls to adventure or if you are stuck in a spae of fear of discomfort. Do you answer your Heralds with a YES or a NO?Lori LeeEpisode 92 Interview with Carmel Clermont: Mother to the MassesEpisode 92 Interview with Carmel Clermont: Mother to the Masses

             Carmel Clermont is a Haitian woman who was raised by her aunt in Haiti until she was 15 years old. She finally joined her parents in the US in 1986. She went to high school, and to college, got married and had 5 children, inherited 5 more stepchildren, and decided she was most at home when she was helping others, so she went to work to unofficially adopt 300 children in Haiti through the support of their orphanages.

             Tune into the podcast for the interview with Carmel and discussion topics that include her sex education classes, child prostitution, single mother programs and getting meals and general education for the inhabitants of the two orphanages she has personally taken on.

             For more information on her and on her non-profit the Clermont Care Center:

             https://www.gofundme.com/ClermontInternationalAcademy

             clermontcarecenter@gmail.com,

             clermontcarecenter.org

             https://venmo.com/schoolsponsorship

             https://www.facebook.com/Clermont-Care-Center-Inc-463807990674848

             Carmel Claremont goes beyond creating her own life on purpose, she makes sure that in the creation of her own life she is also creating a better life for others through helping to educate, feed and clothe them. She said to me:

             “I believe with my heart and soul, those that give always have more in return. Matthew 25 V  ^{35  ‘}For I was hungry, and you fed me. I was thirsty, and you gave me a drink. I was a stranger, and you invited me into your home. ³⁶ I was naked, and you gave me clothing. I was sick, and you cared for me. I was in prison, and you visited me.’  One of my greatest accomplishment on earth is becoming a mother, I think I was born to be a mother not only to my own kids but also to others I come encounter with. My aunt raised me, I grew with a lot of love and I see other children that did not have what I have, I always said to myself I want to be the best Mom, I can be.

             Thanks for tuning in this week. See you next week on the Love Your Story podcast for another great story or story tool.

             ]]>Episode 92 Interview with Carmel Clermont: Mother to the Masses

             Carmel Clermont is a Haitian woman who was raised by her aunt in Haiti until she was 15 years old. She finally joined her parents in the US in 1986. She went to high school, and to college, got married and had 5 children, inherited 5 more stepchildren, and decided she was most at home when she was helping others, so she went to work to unofficially adopt 300 children in Haiti through the support of their orphanages.

             Tune into the podcast for the interview with Carmel and discussion topics that include her sex education classes, child prostitution, single mother programs and getting meals and general education for the inhabitants of the two orphanages she has personally taken on.

             For more information on her and on her non-profit the Clermont Care Center:

             https://www.gofundme.com/ClermontInternationalAcademy

             clermontcarecenter@gmail.com,

             clermontcarecenter.org

             https://venmo.com/schoolsponsorship

             https://www.facebook.com/Clermont-Care-Center-Inc-463807990674848

             Carmel Claremont goes beyond creating her own life on purpose, she makes sure that in the creation of her own life she is also creating a better life for others through helping to educate, feed and clothe them. She said to me:

             “I believe with my heart and soul, those that give always have more in return. Matthew 25 V  ^{35  ‘}For I was hungry, and you fed me. I was thirsty, and you gave me a drink. I was a stranger, and you invited me into your home. ³⁶ I was naked, and you gave me clothing. I was sick, and you cared for me. I was in prison, and you visited me.’  One of my greatest accomplishment on earth is becoming a mother, I think I was born to be a mother not only to my own kids but also to others I come encounter with. My aunt raised me, I grew with a lot of love and I see other children that did not have what I have, I always said to myself I want to be the best Mom, I can be.

             Thanks for tuning in this week. See you next week on the Love Your Story podcast for another great story or story tool.

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3256Wed, 20 Jun 2018 09:00:00 -070035:48falsefullCarmel Clermont is a Haitian woman who was raised by her aunt in Haiti until she was 15 years old. She finally joined her parents in the US in 1986. She went to high school, and to college, got married and had 5 children, inherited 5 stepchildren and decided she was most at home when she was helping others, so she went to work to unofficially adopt 300 children in Haiti through the support of their orphanages. Tune in for stories of teaching sex education, child prostitution, single mother programs, schooling and food for all ages, and one woman who creates a story that affects so many others.Lori LeeEpisode 91 Creating Your Life on Purpose (Guest Interview with Taylor Proctor)Episode 91 Creating Your Life on Purpose

             (Guest Interview with Taylor Proctor)

             When a story is told we follow along with the main character and await the challenge or the crux of the story – the adventure, and then we listen or watch as the hero decides what to do. The events have already happened, that’s why the story can be told, but the piece we didn’t need to think about was how the characters in the story made their real-time choices and thus those actions or inactions that moved the story forward.  Let’s talk about that power. As the author of your life story every moment you are moving your story forward. Every choice, every action creates ripples, creates responses, closes doors, open doors, hurts, helps, generates energy and creates your future.  Will you enjoy poetry and tea and snuggling with a cute little Yorkie to start your day, as I did this morning? Will you start off choosing actions that make YOUR soul sing, or create love? Will you fight off fear that may loom about your day ahead? Will you yell at your kids, or take a run, or take someone for granted, or listen to an inspirational podcast that may trigger an action that will change up your day and maybe your story? Will you allow your inner critic to rip into you today, or will you manage your inner stories?  The choices are endless – really, you could create anything. What will you create today? Right now? What is your storyline? Is it on autopilot or can you shake it up for a little novelty?  Maybe just what you need today is to do something completely unexpected. Ooohhhhh – what might that be and where might that take you? Do it!

             One of the tag-lines of Love Your Story is that it seeks to empower and inspire you to create your best life story on purpose. This statement exudes personal responsibility, but it also glows with power.

             In her book The 90 Day Life, Dr. Jen Faber says,  One of the first things we must do in order to live well is to accept the responsibility we have for our own lives. “We are not the side effect of our current circumstances. We are the Cause of them. Once you realize that you had the power to create the way of life you’re in right now, you’ll see that you have the same power to change it.”

             This is not to say that you caused everything that happened to you in your life. I’m never a fan of that theory, but it is to say that your thoughts, your perceptions, your actions, your inactions, your boundaries, your allowances, your inner stories have indeed played the major role in your life as it is…and equally important is the fact that your current circumstances are a result of your interpretation of those events and if you are caught in circumstances that hold you hostage due to your past, you DO have the option to choose to heal, and thus to change your future circumstances. With healing comes a change of vision, of attitude, of gratitude and those things are key in changing your future circumstances.

             Let me get a little scientific on you for a minute.

             When you open your eyes do you see the world as it really is? Do you see reality?  This is how the book Deviate: The Science of Seeing Differently, by Beau Lotto, starts out. Deviate is a neuroscientist scientific discussion explaining why we don’t, in any way, see reality. Our senses play a limited role in what we perceive, the rest of what we create comes from our assumptions. Our brains have evolved to do this, and it works, but becoming self-aware that our perceptions aren’t reality gives us a space for questioning and breaking out of old stories that hold us back. The fact that we can perceive our own perception is amazing…. How do we step outside the past to live differently in the future? How can you change your way of seeing? How can we become active writers of our own story?

             You’re the only one seeing what you see. Perception is profoundly...]]>Episode 91 Creating Your Life on Purpose

             (Guest Interview with Taylor Proctor)

             When a story is told we follow along with the main character and await the challenge or the crux of the story – the adventure, and then we listen or watch as the hero decides what to do. The events have already happened, that’s why the story can be told, but the piece we didn’t need to think about was how the characters in the story made their real-time choices and thus those actions or inactions that moved the story forward.  Let’s talk about that power. As the author of your life story every moment you are moving your story forward. Every choice, every action creates ripples, creates responses, closes doors, open doors, hurts, helps, generates energy and creates your future.  Will you enjoy poetry and tea and snuggling with a cute little Yorkie to start your day, as I did this morning? Will you start off choosing actions that make YOUR soul sing, or create love? Will you fight off fear that may loom about your day ahead? Will you yell at your kids, or take a run, or take someone for granted, or listen to an inspirational podcast that may trigger an action that will change up your day and maybe your story? Will you allow your inner critic to rip into you today, or will you manage your inner stories?  The choices are endless – really, you could create anything. What will you create today? Right now? What is your storyline? Is it on autopilot or can you shake it up for a little novelty?  Maybe just what you need today is to do something completely unexpected. Ooohhhhh – what might that be and where might that take you? Do it!

             One of the tag-lines of Love Your Story is that it seeks to empower and inspire you to create your best life story on purpose. This statement exudes personal responsibility, but it also glows with power.

             In her book The 90 Day Life, Dr. Jen Faber says,  One of the first things we must do in order to live well is to accept the responsibility we have for our own lives. “We are not the side effect of our current circumstances. We are the Cause of them. Once you realize that you had the power to create the way of life you’re in right now, you’ll see that you have the same power to change it.”

             This is not to say that you caused everything that happened to you in your life. I’m never a fan of that theory, but it is to say that your thoughts, your perceptions, your actions, your inactions, your boundaries, your allowances, your inner stories have indeed played the major role in your life as it is…and equally important is the fact that your current circumstances are a result of your interpretation of those events and if you are caught in circumstances that hold you hostage due to your past, you DO have the option to choose to heal, and thus to change your future circumstances. With healing comes a change of vision, of attitude, of gratitude and those things are key in changing your future circumstances.

             Let me get a little scientific on you for a minute.

             When you open your eyes do you see the world as it really is? Do you see reality?  This is how the book Deviate: The Science of Seeing Differently, by Beau Lotto, starts out. Deviate is a neuroscientist scientific discussion explaining why we don’t, in any way, see reality. Our senses play a limited role in what we perceive, the rest of what we create comes from our assumptions. Our brains have evolved to do this, and it works, but becoming self-aware that our perceptions aren’t reality gives us a space for questioning and breaking out of old stories that hold us back. The fact that we can perceive our own perception is amazing…. How do we step outside the past to live differently in the future? How can you change your way of seeing? How can we become active writers of our own story?

             You’re the only one seeing what you see. Perception is profoundly personal

             Beau Lotto, posits that we do not live in reality – our senses are limited, we can only see a certain range of colors; we can only hear a certain range of sounds. We are aware of only limited dimensions. We have a limited and small window in which we as humans can actually see through. And we know it is small because other creatures have broader ranges of perception than we do. We know other things exist that we do not comprehend through our senses, which is our way of getting information from the world around us.

             The importance of understanding that we don’t really see reality in the greatest truth of things, is the basis for accepting that we create our own realities – our own stories of what is going on, in order to adapt to our environment and survive. The first key here is that reality is subjective. We create it from the exposure we have had to the environment around us and the things it has taught us.

             The second key I want to focus on from is research is the plasticity of the brain.

             It is a scientific fact that the brain is always adapting, learning and changing. This means we keep adapting to our environments, to the experiences we are going through. Old dogs CAN learn new tricks if they want to. We can change our perceptions. We can change our habits.

             Our mind is always adapting according to its perceptions, which reshapes the networks in our cortex, which is the basis for our behavior: established neural pathways.

             So his next scientific point is that minds match their ecology; ecology – the interactive relationship between things and the surrounds in which they exist. Studies have shown that people and animals that live in spaces deprived of stimulus, challenge, love, etc. their brains adapt accordingly. Whereas the more alive, different and challenging an ecology, the more the brain steps up to adapt to the higher pace. This is big for parenting and creating atmospheres full of challenge and opportunity certainly, but it also means that as we seek to create our own stories that we CAN change our perceptions of the past, and thus create different futures. We can open ourselves to new cultures and new experiences, which stretches our minds and engages with an ecology that is broader than one where we limit ourselves to a story that comprehends only habit and singular ways of seeing the world. For example, it has been proven that those who travel outside their cultures and have been exposed to broader ecologies have brains that are able to comprehend broader ways of seeing people and life because they have been influenced by diverse stimuli, rather than exposed only to smaller realms of understanding.

             In this example, people who travel more have actual physiological differences within their brains. Adapting means our brains physically change according to what they are exposed to. Your ecology – or environment -shapes your brain. Your reshaped brain creates a change of behaviors that continue to mold your brain. These adaptations change your future.

             If I can sum that up it comes down to the idea that our brains have taken in the stimulus of our surroundings, our ecology, and we have established neural response pathways to that information. The brain is reformable, it is constantly adjusting to its environment and so we can broaden our experiences and our outer ecological atmospheres which will help us to expand our perceptions and/or we can reshape our perceptions on purpose by choosing to give different meaning to the events of the past, which as you alter their meaning you then alter future reflexive response, thus you change what you are capable of. We are complex and wonderful enough that we observe our own perceptions and deviate on purpose, time and again, to get to where we wish to be. Like when a pilot makes constant adjustments in order to arrive at the right place.

             Ok. Let’s deviate from science here and go to pop-culture:

             In the movie, I Feel Pretty with Amy Schumer, an ordinary gal who is a little heavy, struggles with feelings of insecurity and inadequacy on a daily basis. The movie does a great job of letting us see inside her self-loathing, which is heartbreaking. So, in the movie she falls off a spin bike at the gym, hits her head and wakes from the fall seeing herself as the most beautiful woman she’s ever seen – exactly what she’s always wanted to be. She feels capable and confident and is empowered to live her life fearlessly, which is extraordinary to watch because nothing about her externally changes, it is nothing more than her own internal story that changes. This movie is what I talk about all the time about the difference our inner stories – the stories we tell ourselves about ourselves—can and do make in the creation of our worlds, of our realities, of our life stories. Watching her interact with men, go after the job she wants, rise to the top of her company because she is no longer self-conscious is this beautiful illustration of what is possible for all of us with this same mind shift. Watch it – if you haven’t, just to see what I mean, bold and big in story form! This simple shift of perception creates such a totally different story and world for Renee, it’s absolutely delicious. But it’s delicious because it applies to all of us.

             So, scientifically it is proven that we can change our behavior by changing our perceptions. And, as the movie illustrates so beautifully, with those changed perceptions we create a reality with an entirely different outcome – write a completely different story full of such staggering possibility when we lose the self-doubt and self-criticism, or change the past stories that we are stuck in.

             And then the next step is that in creating this different story, this different future, creating your life on purpose also requires our action.

             Dr. Jen Faber, in her book The 90-Day Life, said, “Nothing in my life ever materialized overnight. It was a series of decisions, actions, wake-up calls, and course corrections that made it happen, and all of that took time, a ton of awareness and a hunger for change.”

             Do the quiet yearnings of your heart create just a space of yearning, or does it create action?

             I bring this third point up, not to discourage you with tales of work, but rather to point out that creating a life on purpose starts with our thoughts, but it is moved forward by our choices and our actions, and our constant awareness of our perceptions and adjustments in order to get to our destination. For example, every morning I check my internal stories. Every morning I review my positive mantras and change the negative comments that creep in. This is a daily exercise. Every morning I rehearse my gratitudes. But here’s the good news – because of the plasticity of the brain, those positive things start to become the new normal. And that changes the game.

             Creating your life story on purpose is about deciding what you want, making choices to get you there, reforming your neural pathways in support of what you’re creating, persistently choosing love and novelty and whatever floats your boat. It’s about deciding and then taking your power to do – to act. If something, some thought, someone feels like it’s stopping you, you have the power and choice to change perception or to change your situation.

             Sunny Jacobs, a woman who was wrongly accused, put in prison on death row, and later released shared her thoughts about our ability to choose our frame of mind, our perspective, and our reframe. She said, “There is a freedom that only you can give to yourself, and that’s the most important freedom of all.”

             I want to end with a quick story about a woman who struggled with the all too familiar struggles of creating something she wanted, and how she finally did it.

             Tune in to the podcast for the interview with Taylor Proctor, the owner and host of the Happiness Abound podcast.

             For more information on her:

             Happinessabound.com

             Happiness Abound blog – Facebook

             You can find her podcast on iTunes and Google Play

             Thank you for being with us today for this discussion. Let me sum up the points really quickly. To create our own life story we first have to take responsibility for the power we have to create our own lives. Then we talked about understanding that our perceptions of things going on around us come directly from our experiences and the environment to which our brain has been exposed and thus learned to adapt to and we see this as reality, but it is not reality, it is not fact. Our interpretations of the events around us, things happening to us, thing going on in the world are completely objective and understanding this gives us room for choosing to see things more fluidly, to observe our observation and choose different interpretations that will support our growth. We can choose to reframe old interpretations of our life stories/events which can create space for an entirely different future.

             Then we talked about the plasticity of the brain and how this reformable aspect of our physiology allows us to create new habits, to broaden our ecologies, to orchestrate our lives. Then we talked about the importance of taking that action to use that plasticity to our advantage in changing our internal dialog – so like we saw in the movie, I Feel Pretty, we can change our actions and our futures.

             Our lives start with our thoughts – that means those should be the first space we look to when creating our life on purpose. If we have thoughts that hold us back we absolutely want to become aware of them and adjust them. Because they lead to our actions, which progress to our habits, which creates our life stories. Boom!

             Go forth fellow story creators and have an awesome week orchestrating your own life for your own best happiness. Because if you don’t, nobody else will.

             A quick reminder to head to loveyourstorypodcast.com to share your thoughts or comments, to sign up for the 21-Day Challenge or the course on reframing the past stories that hold you back, or just to listen to or share other podcast episodes. See you next week.

              

             Take Action – Create on Purpose.

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3294Wed, 13 Jun 2018 09:00:47 -070026:34falsefull9191Every choice, every action creates ripples, creates responses, closes doors, open doors, hurts, helps, generates energy and creates your future.  Will you start off choosing actions that make YOUR soul sing, or create love? Will you fight off fear that may loom about your day ahead? Will you yell at your kids, or take a run, or take someone for granted, or listen to an inspirational podcast that may trigger an action that will change up your day and maybe your story? Will you allow your inner critic to rip into you today, or will you manage your inner stories?  The choices are endless – really, you could create anything. What will you create today? Right now? What is your storyline? Is it on autopilot or can you shake it up for a little novelty?  Maybe just what you need today is to do something completely unexpected. Ooohhhhh – what might that be and where might that take you? Do it! Tune in for a scientific, as well as a pop-culture look at how we really do create our own experiences and how we can be in charge of that. I also have a guest interview with Taylor Proctor the host of the Happiness Abound podcast.Lori LeeEpisode 90 Your Origin Story: Where are you from? (Guest interview with Will Schaub)Episode 90 Your Origin Story: Where are you from?

             (Guest interview with Will Schaub)

             What is an origin story?  The definition found in the ever trusted source of Wikidepia states that:” In entertainment, an origin story is an account or back-story revealing how a character or group of people become a protagonist or antagonist, and adds to the overall study of a narrative, often giving reasons for their intentions.”

             I will add that sometimes it’s focused on what led you to a certain place – the origin of the journey. Sometimes it’s about your heritage – where you come from and how those family lines help define who you are and what you stand for.  Why does an origin story matter? Stay tuned for a story and discussion on this very topic.

             So, why does an origin story matter?  It basically boils down to helping people understand you or your idea, and story is ideal for this. Have you ever wanted someone to understand where a concept came from – like, for me, I may want to share the story of how Love Your Story was developed – Love Your Story definitely has an origin story (which BTW you can watch a video of that on the website at loveyourstorypodcast.com); or you’d really like to share with someone the story of where YOU come from so they can understand you more completely – seeking to connect with another human.

             Origin stories are powerful in business as they help you show, not just tell, why you do what you do and why that should matter to your employees or clients. For example:

             David Hutchins Origin Story example in the book Circle of the 9 Muses:

             There was an MBA student in the US on scholarship.

             “I grew up in S America and we didn’t have any money. The way we earned our money was that my father owned a trophy shop. His whole family worked there to survive. One day a famous Hollywood superstar came into their little trophy shop because they were filming a movie in town. That was really exciting for us.”

             “I spent my entire childhood observing winners, because the people who came into the trophy shop were winning things, accomplishing things. I was always fascinated. I would always watch them- whether it was Shaun Penn or the coach of a winning team. What did these winners have in common?  I wanted to understand everything I could about winners and leaders – that’s what I want to do for my career. That’s what brought me here to the US to get my MBA.”

             Now he’s not just someone who needs the job, he’s got depth and drive. Now you can see that he is there because this is an expression of his identity. This is who he is.

             In our personal lives, our origin stories may be useful for connecting with others, but they may also be most important to ourselves.

             Will Schaub, was born in Saigon, Vietnam during the Vietnam War. His mother is Vietnamese and his father is from Kansas City, MO. He has 3 brothers and 1 sister and they came to the US in 1971. His father dies shortly after they arrive and what ensues after as he watches the struggles of his mother through his childhood creates an origin story has helped shape his responses to his own life journey.

             Listen to the podcast to hear Will tell his story.

             For more information or to contact Will:

             will@willservsolutions.com

             www.willservsolutions.com

             You can also find him on LinkedIn and Facebook

              

             Spiderman’s origin story is based in receiving his powers from a scientific accident. Batman’s origin story is based in the death of his parents and how this shapes his choices and the trajectory of his life. Wonder Woman’s origin story is one of being raised by all-female Amazonian warriors with a sense of responsibility to the world. Superhero origin stories are fun to look at and they ALWAYS play the major role in the character and their...]]>Episode 90 Your Origin Story: Where are you from?

             (Guest interview with Will Schaub)

             What is an origin story?  The definition found in the ever trusted source of Wikidepia states that:” In entertainment, an origin story is an account or back-story revealing how a character or group of people become a protagonist or antagonist, and adds to the overall study of a narrative, often giving reasons for their intentions.”

             I will add that sometimes it’s focused on what led you to a certain place – the origin of the journey. Sometimes it’s about your heritage – where you come from and how those family lines help define who you are and what you stand for.  Why does an origin story matter? Stay tuned for a story and discussion on this very topic.

             So, why does an origin story matter?  It basically boils down to helping people understand you or your idea, and story is ideal for this. Have you ever wanted someone to understand where a concept came from – like, for me, I may want to share the story of how Love Your Story was developed – Love Your Story definitely has an origin story (which BTW you can watch a video of that on the website at loveyourstorypodcast.com); or you’d really like to share with someone the story of where YOU come from so they can understand you more completely – seeking to connect with another human.

             Origin stories are powerful in business as they help you show, not just tell, why you do what you do and why that should matter to your employees or clients. For example:

             David Hutchins Origin Story example in the book Circle of the 9 Muses:

             There was an MBA student in the US on scholarship.

             “I grew up in S America and we didn’t have any money. The way we earned our money was that my father owned a trophy shop. His whole family worked there to survive. One day a famous Hollywood superstar came into their little trophy shop because they were filming a movie in town. That was really exciting for us.”

             “I spent my entire childhood observing winners, because the people who came into the trophy shop were winning things, accomplishing things. I was always fascinated. I would always watch them- whether it was Shaun Penn or the coach of a winning team. What did these winners have in common?  I wanted to understand everything I could about winners and leaders – that’s what I want to do for my career. That’s what brought me here to the US to get my MBA.”

             Now he’s not just someone who needs the job, he’s got depth and drive. Now you can see that he is there because this is an expression of his identity. This is who he is.

             In our personal lives, our origin stories may be useful for connecting with others, but they may also be most important to ourselves.

             Will Schaub, was born in Saigon, Vietnam during the Vietnam War. His mother is Vietnamese and his father is from Kansas City, MO. He has 3 brothers and 1 sister and they came to the US in 1971. His father dies shortly after they arrive and what ensues after as he watches the struggles of his mother through his childhood creates an origin story has helped shape his responses to his own life journey.

             Listen to the podcast to hear Will tell his story.

             For more information or to contact Will:

             will@willservsolutions.com

             www.willservsolutions.com

             You can also find him on LinkedIn and Facebook

              

             Spiderman’s origin story is based in receiving his powers from a scientific accident. Batman’s origin story is based in the death of his parents and how this shapes his choices and the trajectory of his life. Wonder Woman’s origin story is one of being raised by all-female Amazonian warriors with a sense of responsibility to the world. Superhero origin stories are fun to look at and they ALWAYS play the major role in the character and their superhero path. As do the stories of our pasts, create for us the forward projection of our lives. I’m going to throw out an idea. As you consider your origin story this week, consider if it has held you back or helped you to live to your greatest potential.

             I throw this out for a little brain time because we have told our life stories, through our perception and our assumptions, and our lenses sooo many times that, of course, we know them forward and backward and they are fact. But this is not true. They are not fact, they are events we’ve interpreted in a certain way, and if that interpretation has added to you making choices that created a small life for you, or a scared life, or an unworthy life, then revisiting those stories and reframing them, considering how you can change your assumptions and shift into stories that create beautiful possibility and celebrate learning and individuality, well….then you’re on to something.

             Will’s story is based in watching his mother struggle, make hard choices, and stretch beyond what she thought she could do. She set an example that helped to propel him when he hit hard times. That seems like an origin story that provided inspiration and examples. Only Will knows if there are other aspects of the story that he could shift. The Love Your Story origin story came from a place of not loving my story and the search to figure out how. That’s a rags to riches —so to speak— story that illustrates taking a weak space and creating good from it.

             Your challenge this week is to consider your own origin story. First, what is it? Second, does it support your best life moving forward? Third, what other angles could you tell this story from? Fourth, Does it need a reframe, and if so, you can jump on the love your story podcast website and sign up for the reframing course.  Love Your Story is here to provide tools to help you love your story and this is one that is available to you.

             Have a great week creating your best life story and I’ll see you back here next week.

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3252Wed, 06 Jun 2018 09:00:39 -070025:11falsefullAn origin story tells where you're from and how you got to the place you are now. It often shows your journey of learning and thus helps others know you better, trust you more, and comprehend how they want to interact with you. Spiderman’s origin story is based in receiving his powers from a scientific accident. Batman’s origin story is based in the death of his parents and how this shapes his choices and the trajectory of his life. Wonder Woman’s origin story is one of being raised by all-female Amazonian warriors with a sense of responsibility to the world. Superhero origin stories are fun to look at and they ALWAYS play the major role in the character and their superhero path. As do the stories of our pasts, create for us the forward projection of our lives In today's episode we talk about how your origin story can help you, and I throw in an interview with Will Schaub, a Vietnamese immigrant and how his origin story of coming to a country as a small child, losing his father, watching his mother struggle to learn a new landscape gave him the roots to overcome his own obstacles in life. Tune in.Lori LeeEpisode 89 Random Acts of Kindness – Boots on the GroundRandom Acts of Kindness – Boots on the Ground

             It’s an inside job

              

             “Along your pathway of life, you will observe that you are not the only traveler. There are others who need your help. There are feet to steady, hands to grasp, minds to encourage, hearts to inspire, and souls to save.”

             –Thomas S. Monson, Past Prophet of the LDS Church

              

             Random Acts of Kindness are a thing. There are groups, websites, and people who rally others to get out and focus on acts of kindness and the creation of goodness and service on purpose. I am one of those who has served as a herald to help rally others into the RAK movement. I created groups and get-togethers for people who want to use this life story tool for bringing some good into the world. During two of these meet-ups I interviewed the people involved so we could get a real BOOTS ON THE GROUND retelling of what it was like. Hopefully you’ll find some inspiration from their stories. The cover photo is a group in Ohio that I was a part of. We made a sign saying we were giving away free hugs. The guy in the middle is one of the people we hugged, a man who wanted a picture with us to remember others reaching out to him.

             Enjoy the episode and I hope it will inspire you to maybe find your own RAK today.

             Tune into the episode to hear the interviews.

             ]]>Random Acts of Kindness – Boots on the Ground

             It’s an inside job

              

             “Along your pathway of life, you will observe that you are not the only traveler. There are others who need your help. There are feet to steady, hands to grasp, minds to encourage, hearts to inspire, and souls to save.”

             –Thomas S. Monson, Past Prophet of the LDS Church

              

             Random Acts of Kindness are a thing. There are groups, websites, and people who rally others to get out and focus on acts of kindness and the creation of goodness and service on purpose. I am one of those who has served as a herald to help rally others into the RAK movement. I created groups and get-togethers for people who want to use this life story tool for bringing some good into the world. During two of these meet-ups I interviewed the people involved so we could get a real BOOTS ON THE GROUND retelling of what it was like. Hopefully you’ll find some inspiration from their stories. The cover photo is a group in Ohio that I was a part of. We made a sign saying we were giving away free hugs. The guy in the middle is one of the people we hugged, a man who wanted a picture with us to remember others reaching out to him.

             Enjoy the episode and I hope it will inspire you to maybe find your own RAK today.

             Tune into the episode to hear the interviews.

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3248Wed, 30 May 2018 09:00:49 -070022:06falsefullRandom Acts of Kindness are a thing. There are groups, websites, and people who rally others to get out and focus on acts of kindness and the creation of goodness and service on purpose. It's a life story tool for creating good things in your story. I am one of those who has served as a herald to help rally others into the RAK movement. I created groups and get-togethers for people who want to use this life story tool for bringing some good into the world. During two of these meet-ups, I interviewed the people involved so we could get a real BOOTS ON THE GROUND retelling of what it was like. Hopefully, you'll find some inspiration from their stories. The cover photo is a group in Ohio that I was a part of. We made a sign saying we were giving away free hugs and we stood in a shopping center for an hour. The guy in the middle is one of the people we hugged, a man who wanted a picture with us to remember others reaching out to him.  Tune in to today's podcast for interviews with those who were in the RAK groups. It may be a little surprising because it turns out that doing Random Acts of Kindness is an inside job. See first hand the resistance we encountered.Lori LeeEpisode 88 Defining our Personal Values: Do you have Stories?Episode 88: Defining Our Personal Values –

             Do you have stories to prove these are your values?

             When a business defines its values it determines what it wants its governing value system to be. Now, this can be hot air, something that sounds good in a mission statement, or it can be something that the management and employees live by.  When we set our own personal value system it’s very similar. Actively choosing the values you wish to create your life around can give you direction, definition, and clarity as you make your day-to-day choices. Stay with me today for some thoughts on the process of setting your own personal values that will guide your life story creation and why you want to do it.

              

             Let me start out with a story

             A  new CEO had been appointed who believed strongly in putting the customer first. Right away he implemented the policy of all employees parking at the back of the lot to keep the closer spaces open for customers. Soon thereafter the CEO was out for store visits and arrived at one store just as a torrential downpour was unleashed. The employees watched nervously as he drove around the parking lot waiting to see if he would park at the back of the lot and ruin his expensive suit by running through the rain, or if he’d park up front and call it a special circumstance. A few moments later, they got their answer as the CEO sprinted through 100 yards of pouring rain, completely drenched. His suit was ruined. But, he bought a bargain suit from the store before he started his tour. There was never any question about how employees were expected to act regarding this value. MANAGEMENT MEANT WHAT THEY SAID WHEN THEY SAID THE CUSTOMER COMES FIRST.

             When we as parents and adults set our own personal value system, and then live according to those specific values, we do what this CEO did – we show our children and the world around us what we are serious about. The values we live by, and the values we expect those under our tutelage to live by.

             Early in my first marriage we sat down and created a family motto. Things we stood for. Ways of living that were important to us. We made a chart – like a mission statement you might see in a business, and we put it up so we could refer to it often.

             One of the values I wanted to impart to my children was an appreciation and a love for the outdoors. I wanted to leave a legacy of a love for the land because it was something that had always been important to me.  A space where I found peace, beauty, recreation, spiritual connection. I proceeded through their young lives to take them into nature. To teach them to camp and hike, bike and ski, to canoe and pick up trash. This is one of many values we espouse in our family, and we lived it.

             What have been the values that have been most important to you and the story/life you wanted to create? Do you know them off hand?

             When I sit down with businesses and we start the discussion of values and value stories, we start exploring how this is actually taking place within the business. If you say that customer service is your priority, do you have any stories that show you and your team giving exceptional customer service? If you don’t, maybe that’s NOT really one of your values. The good news is, even if it’s not currently one, and you want it to be one, you can start today with this value in mind.

             So, now, let me get to the meat of today’s discussion. What are your personal values? Have you ever taken the time to define 1,2,3,  personal values that you want to base your life story around? Another angle could be—what do you want people to say about you at your funeral. Were you the one who was always making others laugh? Always comforting someone? Known for your honesty? Was hard work your mantra? What about joy, integrity, virtue?

             Today’s discussion is to get you thinking. If you]]>Episode 88: Defining Our Personal Values –

             Do you have stories to prove these are your values?

             When a business defines its values it determines what it wants its governing value system to be. Now, this can be hot air, something that sounds good in a mission statement, or it can be something that the management and employees live by.  When we set our own personal value system it’s very similar. Actively choosing the values you wish to create your life around can give you direction, definition, and clarity as you make your day-to-day choices. Stay with me today for some thoughts on the process of setting your own personal values that will guide your life story creation and why you want to do it.

              

             Let me start out with a story

             A  new CEO had been appointed who believed strongly in putting the customer first. Right away he implemented the policy of all employees parking at the back of the lot to keep the closer spaces open for customers. Soon thereafter the CEO was out for store visits and arrived at one store just as a torrential downpour was unleashed. The employees watched nervously as he drove around the parking lot waiting to see if he would park at the back of the lot and ruin his expensive suit by running through the rain, or if he’d park up front and call it a special circumstance. A few moments later, they got their answer as the CEO sprinted through 100 yards of pouring rain, completely drenched. His suit was ruined. But, he bought a bargain suit from the store before he started his tour. There was never any question about how employees were expected to act regarding this value. MANAGEMENT MEANT WHAT THEY SAID WHEN THEY SAID THE CUSTOMER COMES FIRST.

             When we as parents and adults set our own personal value system, and then live according to those specific values, we do what this CEO did – we show our children and the world around us what we are serious about. The values we live by, and the values we expect those under our tutelage to live by.

             Early in my first marriage we sat down and created a family motto. Things we stood for. Ways of living that were important to us. We made a chart – like a mission statement you might see in a business, and we put it up so we could refer to it often.

             One of the values I wanted to impart to my children was an appreciation and a love for the outdoors. I wanted to leave a legacy of a love for the land because it was something that had always been important to me.  A space where I found peace, beauty, recreation, spiritual connection. I proceeded through their young lives to take them into nature. To teach them to camp and hike, bike and ski, to canoe and pick up trash. This is one of many values we espouse in our family, and we lived it.

             What have been the values that have been most important to you and the story/life you wanted to create? Do you know them off hand?

             When I sit down with businesses and we start the discussion of values and value stories, we start exploring how this is actually taking place within the business. If you say that customer service is your priority, do you have any stories that show you and your team giving exceptional customer service? If you don’t, maybe that’s NOT really one of your values. The good news is, even if it’s not currently one, and you want it to be one, you can start today with this value in mind.

             So, now, let me get to the meat of today’s discussion. What are your personal values? Have you ever taken the time to define 1,2,3,  personal values that you want to base your life story around? Another angle could be—what do you want people to say about you at your funeral. Were you the one who was always making others laugh? Always comforting someone? Known for your honesty? Was hard work your mantra? What about joy, integrity, virtue?

             Today’s discussion is to get you thinking. If you are going to plan your life story on purpose, you’ve got to have guiding principles; values that help you know what you stand for and guide you as you try to live the life you want to create – our children need this clarity from us also. Most of us, I dare say, probably leave it undefined. We’re good people, we’re going to try and live good lives. BUT the power in defining a set of specific personal values comes in handy when tough situations arise. Like the CEO in the rain storm  – he knew he wanted to put customer service first, so when it came time to make the decision of where to park, he knew where he stood on the issue.

             It reminds me of roll playing with my kids before they got put in tough social and peer pressure situations. “If your buddy offers you a beer at a party, what do you do?” The parent has made clear that underage drinking is not acceptable as a family value, then they help their children recognize the situation and learn how to navigate it. The parents often can share stories of the value in action to teach and illustrate. I shared with my kids the stories of watching my high school friends drink, all strung out on the floor at parties and making fools of themselves, and simply deciding one Saturday night that I was tired of being the only person who could carry on an intelligent conversation, stand up, or drive. I was bored to death watching drunk people lay around and throw up. So, I found new friends. It wasn’t easy…it was a big move in high school to change out friend groups almost entirely, but after awhile I had made the transition.  Sometimes our stories are warning stories of what not to do as well. Stories of how we did the wrong thing and what we learned from it.  This is the power of story at work. Our stories allow us to illustrate real-life situations. They allow us to warn. They allow us to teach and even take stock of ourselves.

             When a business defines it’s company values this it is the jumping off point for how they will treat others, how they will treat those inside the company and what they will expect from themselves and those who work with them. If you know your company value is centered on providing the latest technology for your clients – you’ve said it, you’ve put it on paper, you’ve discussed it with your people, you start looking for ways you can make this happen. You go to trade shows and stay on top of the trends, you know where you’re coming from and you’re all about new technology – you dig for it, you’re hungry for it, you market around it, you share it with your customers. It always starts with deciding what you’re about, then developing those ways of being on purpose. And guess what happens? You start to collect stories of you in action doing exactly what you said you would do. Showing what you are about.

             It works the same way in our personal lives.

             If one of your personal or family values is honesty, and you can’t think of any times where your honesty really stood out, is that truly one of your values? On the other hand, when you start living that value full force, you’ll quickly accumulate stories of honest interactions, even and especially in tough situations, that will illustrate you living up to that value. Then you start collecting your stories.

             If you determine that IS your family value, then when small and large circumstances come up you know your course of action ahead of time – and so do your kids. Maybe that means you don’t piggyback off someone else’s wi-fi, maybe that means when the grocer forgets to charge you for the cereal that you return and let them know. Maybe when you get in a tiff with a neighbor and you later find out you were in the wrong you fess up and apologize. Maybe it means that you take losses at work in order to be fair with others. Maybe it’s much bigger, but the decision to base your life choices around a certain value help determine your course of action ahead of time. That works for adults as well as kids. I think we, no matter our age, might all just be kids working on hard things at different levels.

             Ayn Rand said, “Happiness is that state of consciousness which proceeds from the achievement of one’s values.” And isn’t happiness what we’re all trying to create in our stories? I know I am. I also know that when I’m not living up to my values and the things I profess to believe, that those are the times I am definitely the most unhappy because I am at odds with myself.

             So, one of the reasons to define your values and to collect stories of you living those values, as a parent in particular, is that the stories will allow you to illustrate what those values really mean to you and thus allow you to teach your children through the use of story.

             Values are subjective. To one person, integrity means doing what his boss or parent or authority figure tells him to do. To someone else, integrity means saying no when it doesn’t feel right, even if it costs you your job or your good standing or your relationship. If you want to encourage a value or teach a value you have to provide a demonstration by telling a story that illustrates in action what that value means, behaviorally, or acting on that value and defining it through the action —which then provides a story, of course.

             Like the CEO – he SHOWED his employees what it meant to put the customer first.

             One of the values I felt was important to teach my children was that of service and thinking of others rather than of themselves. This is, of course, an on-going process, but from the time they were quite young, we would embark on service projects. We once created a group called the Secret Service Agents and we’d go out and haul in people’s garbage cans, or rake leaves. That lasted for a few months. Then we’d work at the food pantry filling bags or sorting bins. We’d walk dogs at the dog shelter. We made pillow and blankets for refugees. We collected clothes and toys to send to the Philippines, we made hygiene kits by collecting, buying, and sorting all the needed supplies and putting them together to send through a woman who sent big boxes back to the Philippines each year. We’ve walked around Salt Lake City and given burritos to the homeless – through the Burrito Project. We’ve sent cards to cancer patients through Girls Love Mail. We’ve collected blankets for the homeless, books for charity, donated time to fundraisers for breast cancer and relay for life. We’ve painted garbage cans in Yosemite and helped with Eagle Scout projects. Do my children know how to do service? I hope so. Do we have stories? We’ve got a few, but mostly I have a list, the one I just read off, that makes me feel like I did okay as a mom helping my kids learn, through action, to think outside their own needs. Did I show my kids I was serious about service? Every time I proposed another service project, they knew we were about doing good in the world. It was a value I put into action.

             So, here’s a recommendation

             1. Define the top 3 values you want your story to include. Three things that you want to be known for. Three things you want to pass on to your children or grandchildren. Three things you would be proud to live by. Go ahead. Pause the podcast and figure out what those 3 things are. Now – note, you can of course choose as many values as you like, but if you choose too many you’ll get discouraged. Maybe 3 is even too many. You decide, but having one or two things to really do a stellar job at, might be the key to the most success.
             2. Write them down. Put them on paper so you don’t forget. Reread them, share them, hold yourself accountable. Maybe that’s personal. Maybe it’s with your family. If it is with your family and everyone is going to get involved, you can all work to hold one another accountable as you share the successes.
             3. Start to live them with focus and fervor. Start to collect the stories that show you in action.
             4. Celebrate all the wins! Celebrate every value story.
             5. Keep on keepin on! These are a way of life – the way of life YOU chose.

             
             

              

             So, in closing. This week your challenge is to follow these first 3 steps – decide on your values, write them down, start to live them ….this will help you to start collecting your value stories. Have fun out there creating the life story you want.

             Don’t forget to share this podcast with someone you know who could use a little empowerment today. Share the love people.

             Also, go to the website: www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and sign up for the 21-Day Challenge to create more love, connection, and possibility in your story over the next 3 weeks.  See you next week.

              

              

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3191Wed, 23 May 2018 09:00:12 -070022:33falsefullWhen a business defines its values it determines what it wants its governing value system to be with customers and employees. When we set our own personal value system it’s very similar. Actively choosing the values you wish to create your life around can give you direction, definition, and clarity as you make your day-to-day choices it also creates stories you can use to teach your children with. Stay with me today for some thoughts on the process of setting your own personal values that will guide your life story creation and why you want to do it. What are your values? Do you have stories of you living your values? If you don't, maybe those aren't really your values. Let's talk about it.Lori LeeEpisode 87 Interview with Jen Faber: How to Live More in 3 Months than you have in 3 YearsEpisode 87 Interview with Jen Faber:

             How to Live More in 3 Months  than you have in 3 Years

              

             What does a successful life look and feel like to you? For everyone it’s going to be a little different. For Dr. Jen Faber, my guest today, she had built a six-figure wellness practice and was a thought leader in her industry, but despite all she had created in her professional life she felt like a version of herself was trapped inside and was screaming to break free.  Jen had to redefine what a successful life meant to her. She took a hard look at the fact that a good life for her was about doing what made her happy, living in a thrive mode and feeling alive every day. So, she made changes…she sold everything she owned and became a digital nomad. Stay tuned as we get a peek into someone who has taken the refrain we so often talk about – of creating your life on purpose – and let’s watch how she did it.

             Dr. Jen Faber is a lifestyle entrepreneur and author of “The 90 Day Life: How to Live More in 3 Months than you have in 3 years.” Her purpose is to empower people to break away from burnout to living the life of their dreams. For the past 15 years, Dr. Jen has focused on the fields of health and wellness, neuroscience, psychology, and motivation. She was awarded the Hilldale Research Fellowship in Social Psychology and was a teaching assistant in Experimental Psychology. She received her doctorate of Chiropractic in 2006. She worked in Morocco, New Zealand and then returned to the US and transitioned to coaching.

             Tune into the podcast for the interview with Jen Faber and almost a full hour of how to create your life on purpose.

             One of the main mantras of Love Your Story is the control we each have, that YOU have to create your own life story on purpose. Sometimes that’s just cleaning up your past stories so you can create the future you want. Sometimes that’s making small changes that add more connection or peace to your everyday life, sometimes that might look like a major overhaul like Dr. Jen shared with us on her life path. Whatever it is for you – please accept that YOU have the right, responsibility, and power to create your life on purpose. Does it take courage to make changes – sometimes A LOT. Does it take vision – a burning vision! Does it take vulnerability and a willingness for some adventure – YOU BET! But you only live once. What story will you create? What story will your life tell?

             There was a poem I used to have on my wall years ago:

             If I Had My Life to Live Over by Nadine Stair

             If I had my life to live over,

             I’d dare to make more mistakes next time.

             I’d relax, I would limber up.

             I would be sillier than I have been this trip.

             I would take fewer things seriously.

             I would take more chances.

              

             I would climb more mountains and swim more rivers.

             I would eat more ice cream and less beans.

             I would perhaps have more actual troubles,

             but I’d Have fewer imaginary ones.

              

             You see, I am one of those people who has lived sensibly and sanely,

             hour after hour, day after day.

             Oh, I’ve had my moments, and if I had to do it over again,

             I’d have more of them.

             In fact, I’d try to have nothing else.

             Just moments,

             one after another,

             instead of living so many years ahead of each day.

              

             I’ve been one of those people who never goes anywhere

             without a thermometer, a hot water bottle,

             a raincoat and a parachute.

             If I had to do it again, I would travel lighter than I have.

             If i had my life to live over,

             ...]]>Episode 87 Interview with Jen Faber:

             How to Live More in 3 Months  than you have in 3 Years

              

             What does a successful life look and feel like to you? For everyone it’s going to be a little different. For Dr. Jen Faber, my guest today, she had built a six-figure wellness practice and was a thought leader in her industry, but despite all she had created in her professional life she felt like a version of herself was trapped inside and was screaming to break free.  Jen had to redefine what a successful life meant to her. She took a hard look at the fact that a good life for her was about doing what made her happy, living in a thrive mode and feeling alive every day. So, she made changes…she sold everything she owned and became a digital nomad. Stay tuned as we get a peek into someone who has taken the refrain we so often talk about – of creating your life on purpose – and let’s watch how she did it.

             Dr. Jen Faber is a lifestyle entrepreneur and author of “The 90 Day Life: How to Live More in 3 Months than you have in 3 years.” Her purpose is to empower people to break away from burnout to living the life of their dreams. For the past 15 years, Dr. Jen has focused on the fields of health and wellness, neuroscience, psychology, and motivation. She was awarded the Hilldale Research Fellowship in Social Psychology and was a teaching assistant in Experimental Psychology. She received her doctorate of Chiropractic in 2006. She worked in Morocco, New Zealand and then returned to the US and transitioned to coaching.

             Tune into the podcast for the interview with Jen Faber and almost a full hour of how to create your life on purpose.

             One of the main mantras of Love Your Story is the control we each have, that YOU have to create your own life story on purpose. Sometimes that’s just cleaning up your past stories so you can create the future you want. Sometimes that’s making small changes that add more connection or peace to your everyday life, sometimes that might look like a major overhaul like Dr. Jen shared with us on her life path. Whatever it is for you – please accept that YOU have the right, responsibility, and power to create your life on purpose. Does it take courage to make changes – sometimes A LOT. Does it take vision – a burning vision! Does it take vulnerability and a willingness for some adventure – YOU BET! But you only live once. What story will you create? What story will your life tell?

             There was a poem I used to have on my wall years ago:

             If I Had My Life to Live Over by Nadine Stair

             If I had my life to live over,

             I’d dare to make more mistakes next time.

             I’d relax, I would limber up.

             I would be sillier than I have been this trip.

             I would take fewer things seriously.

             I would take more chances.

              

             I would climb more mountains and swim more rivers.

             I would eat more ice cream and less beans.

             I would perhaps have more actual troubles,

             but I’d Have fewer imaginary ones.

              

             You see, I am one of those people who has lived sensibly and sanely,

             hour after hour, day after day.

             Oh, I’ve had my moments, and if I had to do it over again,

             I’d have more of them.

             In fact, I’d try to have nothing else.

             Just moments,

             one after another,

             instead of living so many years ahead of each day.

              

             I’ve been one of those people who never goes anywhere

             without a thermometer, a hot water bottle,

             a raincoat and a parachute.

             If I had to do it again, I would travel lighter than I have.

             If i had my life to live over,

             I would start bare foot earlier in the spring

             and stay that way later in the fall.

             I would go to more dances.

             I would ride more merry-go-rounds.

             I would pick more daises.

              

             Create your best life on purpose people! Whatever that means to you. Love Your Story is here to remind you and empower you to live and create a story you will love! Share this podcast with someone you think needs it and as always – just a reminder to head to the website

             www.loveyourstorypodcast.com to sign up for the 21-Day Challenge for life hacks on living your best life.

             Until next week –

             Links for Jen Faber

             hello@drjenfaber.com

             to get Dr. jen’s book, go to: 90daylifebook.com

             Jen’s website: drjenfaber.com

             To follow Jen on social media: facebook.com/drjenfaber; instagram.com/drjenfaber

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3188Wed, 16 May 2018 09:00:58 -070055:18falsefullWhat does a successful life look and feel like to you? For everyone, it’s going to be a little different. For Dr. Jen Faber, my guest today, she had built a six-figure wellness practice and was a thought leader in her industry, but despite all she had created in her professional life she felt like a version of herself was trapped inside and was screaming to break free.  Jen had to redefine what a successful life meant to her. She took a hard look at the fact that a good life for her was about doing what made her happy, living in a thrive mode and feeling alive every day. So, she made changes…she sold everything she owned and became a digital nomad. Stay tuned as we get a peek into someone who has taken the refrain we so often talk about – of creating your life on purpose – and let’s watch how she did it so we can learn how to do it also. Jen is the author of The 90 Day Life.Lori LeeEpisode 86 Interview with Jennifer Anderson: 3 a.m. with GodEpisode 86 Interview with Jennifer Anderson – Chief Inspiration Officer

             Welcome to the Love Your Story Podcast, Episode 86. Have you ever woken up at approximately 3:00 a.m. in the morning? It’s weird. For years I would wake up between [3:00]- 4:00 a.m. and often at exactly the same minute regardless of when I went to bed. This went on for so long that I started to think it was some sort of weird sign, but then I was listening to Wayne Dyer who talked about waking up at 3:00 a.m. and how he felt great inspiration at that time – how he would write so much of his acclaimed work during those early morning hours. Then one day, Jennifer Anderson stood up and announced that she had created a journal called 3:00 a.m. with God, specifically for recording the thoughts and inspirations that she feels so distinctly during this all too common phenomenon of waking up at 3:00 a.m.

             Jennifer Anderson is well established in her career as a national and international consultant. She is a strategist that helps companies retain their top talent and she is a sought-after speaker about career management. She has made guest appearances on KSL News, The Matt Townsend Show, various podcasts and the Deseret News. She is published in Forbes and ranked as a “Top 40 to Follow” on Twitter.

             Listen in for the actual interview where we talk about how to recognize inspiration and the story of how and why she created the 3 a.m. with God Journal

             If you’re one of those 3:00 a.m. risers – this may be just the ticket for capturing those fleeting nighttime thoughts, inspirations, and dreams.

             Leave comments on the website – and if you’d leave a review on iTunes I’d sure appreciate it. Share the love people. Share this podcast with a friend! See you next week.

             To contact Jennifer or get a journal:

             facebook.com/3amwithgod

             instagram.com/3amwithgod

             jen@3amwithgod.com

             ]]>Episode 86 Interview with Jennifer Anderson – Chief Inspiration Officer

             Welcome to the Love Your Story Podcast, Episode 86. Have you ever woken up at approximately 3:00 a.m. in the morning? It’s weird. For years I would wake up between [3:00]- 4:00 a.m. and often at exactly the same minute regardless of when I went to bed. This went on for so long that I started to think it was some sort of weird sign, but then I was listening to Wayne Dyer who talked about waking up at 3:00 a.m. and how he felt great inspiration at that time – how he would write so much of his acclaimed work during those early morning hours. Then one day, Jennifer Anderson stood up and announced that she had created a journal called 3:00 a.m. with God, specifically for recording the thoughts and inspirations that she feels so distinctly during this all too common phenomenon of waking up at 3:00 a.m.

             Jennifer Anderson is well established in her career as a national and international consultant. She is a strategist that helps companies retain their top talent and she is a sought-after speaker about career management. She has made guest appearances on KSL News, The Matt Townsend Show, various podcasts and the Deseret News. She is published in Forbes and ranked as a “Top 40 to Follow” on Twitter.

             Listen in for the actual interview where we talk about how to recognize inspiration and the story of how and why she created the 3 a.m. with God Journal

             If you’re one of those 3:00 a.m. risers – this may be just the ticket for capturing those fleeting nighttime thoughts, inspirations, and dreams.

             Leave comments on the website – and if you’d leave a review on iTunes I’d sure appreciate it. Share the love people. Share this podcast with a friend! See you next week.

             To contact Jennifer or get a journal:

             facebook.com/3amwithgod

             instagram.com/3amwithgod

             jen@3amwithgod.com

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3172Wed, 09 May 2018 09:00:55 -070038:10falsefullHave you ever woken up at approximately 3:00 a.m. in the morning? It’s weird. For years I would wake up between 3:00- 4:00 a.m. and often at exactly the same minute regardless of when I went to bed. This went on for so long that I started to think it was some sort of weird sign, but then I was listening to Wayne Dyer who talked about waking up at 3:00 a.m. and how he felt great inspiration at that time – how he would write so much of his acclaimed work during those early morning hours. Then one day, Jennifer Anderson stood up and announced that she had created a journal called 3:00 a.m. with God, specifically for recording the thoughts and inspirations that she feels so distinctly during this all too common phenomenon of waking up at 3:00 a.m. Tune in for our discussion and her story on how and why she created the journal, as well as a few ideas on how to recognize inspiration.Lori LeeEpisode 85 Interview Dr. Brenda Kelleher-Flight: Life is a Reflection of ThoughtEpisode 85 Interview Dr. Brenda Kelleher Flight: Life is a Reflection of Thought

             Has your life turned out as you expected? Do you ever feel like things are totally out of your control? Are you overwhelmed, stuck and ready to get your life back?….so starts the paragraph on Dr. Brenda’s home page. And since that very first question she poses is the exact same question as the one I posed on my pre-dissertation research study, you can imagine that I wanted to hear what she had to say about “Has your life turned out as you expected.”

             Brenda is the author of Time to  Forgive and Forget, a certified professional coach, and a qualified mediator. She is known for helping individuals and teams create their story and focus on what they want. There are no mistakes in her world; there are only MIS takes. This means we can learn forward and do another take achieving the results we desire.  Stay tuned for my interview with Dr. Brenda Kelleher-Flight and our discussion on how the stories inside our head are creating our reality and the people we attract, and her thoughts on the idea of Point of Poise.

             For more information on Brenda Kelleher-Flight

             www.gdpconsulting.ca; 

             facebook.com/Brenda–Kelleher-Flight-GDP-Consulting-Inc-122455991132103/

              

             ]]>Episode 85 Interview Dr. Brenda Kelleher Flight: Life is a Reflection of Thought

             Has your life turned out as you expected? Do you ever feel like things are totally out of your control? Are you overwhelmed, stuck and ready to get your life back?….so starts the paragraph on Dr. Brenda’s home page. And since that very first question she poses is the exact same question as the one I posed on my pre-dissertation research study, you can imagine that I wanted to hear what she had to say about “Has your life turned out as you expected.”

             Brenda is the author of Time to  Forgive and Forget, a certified professional coach, and a qualified mediator. She is known for helping individuals and teams create their story and focus on what they want. There are no mistakes in her world; there are only MIS takes. This means we can learn forward and do another take achieving the results we desire.  Stay tuned for my interview with Dr. Brenda Kelleher-Flight and our discussion on how the stories inside our head are creating our reality and the people we attract, and her thoughts on the idea of Point of Poise.

             For more information on Brenda Kelleher-Flight

             www.gdpconsulting.ca; 

             facebook.com/Brenda–Kelleher-Flight-GDP-Consulting-Inc-122455991132103/

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3133Wed, 02 May 2018 09:00:21 -070030:18falsefullBrenda is the author of "Time to  Forgive and Forget" a certified professional coach, and a qualified mediator. She is known for helping individuals and teams create their story and focus on what they want. There are no mistakes in her world; there are only MIS takes. This means we can learn forward and do another take achieving the results we desire.  Stay tuned for my interview with Dr. Brenda Kelleher-Flight and our discussion on how the stories inside our head are creating our reality and the people we attract, and her thoughts on the idea of Point of Poise - staying in emotional balance.Lori LeeEpisode 84 Healing Our StoriesHealing Our Stories

             Healing is a cyclical event. We don’t do it once. We do it over and over. As I ponder on this topic I think about all the people I have interviewed – people who have lost children to hiking accidents, car accidents, suicide. People who have lost spouses and parents to murder and suicide. A woman with an eating disorder and a man whose father tried to kill him as a child in order to prove himself a prophet in God’s eyes. This is just the tip of the iceberg. The stories are raw, powerful, and illustrate people who found ways to stand up, heal, and move on to make the world better, to make their own lives better, and to rise from the ashes of pain, loss, betrayal and self-loathing. Today’s conversation is about healing, because it’s a part of every story, and the alternative is to suffer.

             The things we must heal from are myriad. What affects each of us and how it affects us is very personal–that personal hero’s journey. And the beauty of that is the utter brilliance of it.

             WE EACH HAVE A PERSONAL JOURNEY THAT SPECIFICALLY PLAYS OUT ACCORDING TO THE THINGS WE INDIVIDUALLY NEED TO LEARN. I THINK THE STRONGEST HEROES HAVE BEEN GIVEN THE TOUGHEST JOURNEYS. So, if yours is feeling pretty beat up right now – take heart – and badass up! You’re one of the superheroes.

             Oprah Winfrey said, “Like me, you might have experienced things that caused you to deem yourself unworthy. I know for sure that healing the wounds of the past is one of the biggest and most worthwhile challenges of life. It’s important to know when and how you were programmed, so you can change the program. And doing so is your responsibility, no one else’s. There is one irrefutable law of the universe: We are each responsible for our own life.”

             Let me tell you a story. In 2016 when I started my emotional intelligence training I didn’t really know how to get past where I was. I felt stuck. I knew I didn’t trust men, but I wasn’t really sure how to get around that. Fact was fact. And then, thank God, I started a journey of healing. It involved some crying, some screaming, some vulnerable emotional exposure, it involved telling my stories and reframing them away from victimhood into learning. It involved people who guided me, mentors and heralds. It involved my shadow self and my hero self.

             I arrived in Columbus, Ohio with my friend Anisa. My herald Sally had told me I needed to go to this conference, and being the ever so obedient friend we bought tickets and figured if it sucked we’d just go and have a great weekend in some place we’d never been. We got to our hotel room and the next three days pushed my buttons. One of the first exercises we did was to arbitrarily find a partner – a buddy, and sit across from them. You had to look them in the eyes. You didn’t have to say anything, in fact, you weren’t supposed to. We were instructed to simply maintain eye contact. This was someone I did not know, had never spoken to, and it was a man. As we sat across from one another staring into one another’s eyes and holding hands, tears started to roll down my cheeks. I was so embarrassed. There I was staring into the eyes of some man I didn’t know, and I couldn’t stop myself from crying.  Wow! I thought. I’m in for a ride. But, I really wanted to figure this out – figure out what was holding me back, figure out how to heal, so I kept at it. The leader of the workshop pissed me off because he was so arrogant and disrespectful to the students, but I stayed and bit my tongue because I wanted to move forward and instinctually I knew something was going to happen here. I didn’t know how this was going to work, or what was going to happen, but I knew I was where I needed to be. So, when the workshop leader tried to kick me out because my hand wasn’t raised high enough, I bit my tongue and raised my hand higher. My coach was incredibly tolerant, loving, but tough with me as I questioned everything, challenged...]]>Healing Our Stories

             Healing is a cyclical event. We don’t do it once. We do it over and over. As I ponder on this topic I think about all the people I have interviewed – people who have lost children to hiking accidents, car accidents, suicide. People who have lost spouses and parents to murder and suicide. A woman with an eating disorder and a man whose father tried to kill him as a child in order to prove himself a prophet in God’s eyes. This is just the tip of the iceberg. The stories are raw, powerful, and illustrate people who found ways to stand up, heal, and move on to make the world better, to make their own lives better, and to rise from the ashes of pain, loss, betrayal and self-loathing. Today’s conversation is about healing, because it’s a part of every story, and the alternative is to suffer.

             The things we must heal from are myriad. What affects each of us and how it affects us is very personal–that personal hero’s journey. And the beauty of that is the utter brilliance of it.

             WE EACH HAVE A PERSONAL JOURNEY THAT SPECIFICALLY PLAYS OUT ACCORDING TO THE THINGS WE INDIVIDUALLY NEED TO LEARN. I THINK THE STRONGEST HEROES HAVE BEEN GIVEN THE TOUGHEST JOURNEYS. So, if yours is feeling pretty beat up right now – take heart – and badass up! You’re one of the superheroes.

             Oprah Winfrey said, “Like me, you might have experienced things that caused you to deem yourself unworthy. I know for sure that healing the wounds of the past is one of the biggest and most worthwhile challenges of life. It’s important to know when and how you were programmed, so you can change the program. And doing so is your responsibility, no one else’s. There is one irrefutable law of the universe: We are each responsible for our own life.”

             Let me tell you a story. In 2016 when I started my emotional intelligence training I didn’t really know how to get past where I was. I felt stuck. I knew I didn’t trust men, but I wasn’t really sure how to get around that. Fact was fact. And then, thank God, I started a journey of healing. It involved some crying, some screaming, some vulnerable emotional exposure, it involved telling my stories and reframing them away from victimhood into learning. It involved people who guided me, mentors and heralds. It involved my shadow self and my hero self.

             I arrived in Columbus, Ohio with my friend Anisa. My herald Sally had told me I needed to go to this conference, and being the ever so obedient friend we bought tickets and figured if it sucked we’d just go and have a great weekend in some place we’d never been. We got to our hotel room and the next three days pushed my buttons. One of the first exercises we did was to arbitrarily find a partner – a buddy, and sit across from them. You had to look them in the eyes. You didn’t have to say anything, in fact, you weren’t supposed to. We were instructed to simply maintain eye contact. This was someone I did not know, had never spoken to, and it was a man. As we sat across from one another staring into one another’s eyes and holding hands, tears started to roll down my cheeks. I was so embarrassed. There I was staring into the eyes of some man I didn’t know, and I couldn’t stop myself from crying.  Wow! I thought. I’m in for a ride. But, I really wanted to figure this out – figure out what was holding me back, figure out how to heal, so I kept at it. The leader of the workshop pissed me off because he was so arrogant and disrespectful to the students, but I stayed and bit my tongue because I wanted to move forward and instinctually I knew something was going to happen here. I didn’t know how this was going to work, or what was going to happen, but I knew I was where I needed to be. So, when the workshop leader tried to kick me out because my hand wasn’t raised high enough, I bit my tongue and raised my hand higher. My coach was incredibly tolerant, loving, but tough with me as I questioned everything, challenged everything, and cried more. This was the beginning. The beginning of cleaning house. The beginning of shaking out all the left over pieces that I hadn’t worked through.

             I have a little plaque a friend gave me for Christmas this year. It shows a cute travel trailer and it says, “Sometimes your journey will take you off of your path. It’s all part of the same trip.”

             When I think about the idea of each of us embarking on our own heroes journey, fraught with struggles and gifts just for us; when I picture that each of us have our own heralds put in our path to bring us the messages we need when we need them, and mentors to guide us and provide motivation and inspiration-gifts for our own personal journey; when I think of our own individual threshold guardians who challenge us with challenges that are specially made for us, to see how badly we want what we think we want; and the tricksters in our stories that bring energies of mischief and draw attention to imbalance – but exactly in the way we need it, well, the idea of the individualized heroes journey does a couple things for me: 1. It gives me hope. When I’m feeling like I have GOT to be off the path and wandering around lost on my heroes journey; when I feel like I’m stuck in a bog or the dragons are too fierce and completely unfair, or that things are NOT playing out in the right way, I come back to the idea that I’m exactly where I need to be, learning what I need to learn, and then the panic subsides. 2. It makes me excited. If this journey is going to play out exactly as I need it to, then I’m not alone, I’m guided, there is a purpose beyond my own doing and that makes me excited about what great adventure lies ahead. What will happen today? Who will I meet? What idea will come? What abundance will show up? 3. I get to have double appreciation for the people who come into my life and walk my path with me. They are my beloved tribe, or my teachers, or my mentors, or my heralds. They are a part of my divinely orchestrated story. How cool is that, and how cool are they? 4. The villains in my life become less scary, in a way. They become part of the story of learning, forgiveness, and healing. A part of my journey. A part of my story. And while I don’t like them, if I trust that they have purpose and then I seek to find the meaning, they end up playing a role that is incalculably valuable.

             The trip to Ohio for me was just the start to my healing journey, but it was PART of my journey, a really important part of my journey, and what I learned was that we don’t have to stay stuck. Healing isn’t just dealing with what we’ve been dealt. Healing is so much more.

             So, how do we heal? In my own life, I have sought healing over and over. Every time my heart was broken, during my marriages there were horrible things to try and survive and heal from. When I do stupid things or hurt other people I often feel regret and pain that I have to work through. When mean people hurt me sometimes it takes ages to dare to engage with people again. I’ve tried everything from avoidance, to prayer, to hiding, to running off, to service, to reading voraciously, to getting a rebound boyfriend, etc. etc. It’s a process…but the most powerful ways of healing I have found have been two specific processes. 1. I always turn to God. In the scriptures, Jesus is repeatedly referred to as the master healer, as the Great Physician. Does this mean that when we ask that everything will be put back as it was? Dr. Wendy Ulrich distinguishes healing from cure. She says, “Let me first distinguish between healing from cure. Cure returns us to our previous state of wellness, which is usually what we long for. But the scriptures never speak of the gift of cure. They speak of the gift of healing. Healing is a different process from cure. Healing involves a spiritual and emotional reweaving of our life story to incorporate, not merely remove, our injuries. It involves growth and personal change, maturation into a new state of deeper trust in God despite, no in the absence of, suffering.”

             There have been times when the pain so wracked my body that I fell to my knees in tears begging for it to stop, and it did. Just like that. More than once it’s been taken from me. These times are the miracles and mercies of God, there is no question in my mind about that, for no one else could have done it. There are also processes we must go through. God removing the pain from me momentarily didn’t change the situation or what I would have to deal with. It didn’t take away the resulting baggage necessarily.  It just gave me a reprieve for the moment so I could stand back up and continue on the journey. But inevitably, in the end, I have been brought to a place of the spiritual and emotional reweaving of my life story that allows me to include a level of empathy, understanding, to refrain from judgment, and an overall comprehension of the human experience that I most certainly did not have before my suffering. This was gained with time and with processes and paths of healing that I have no doubt that He put before me. Which brings me to number 2. This is what I call the reframing process. We’ve talked about this before because it’s my patented –okay I really didn’t patent it—but it’s my 5-Step Process for being able to reframe our past stories that we need to heal from so we can move on down our path and get on with our journey. This 5-step process is covered in detail in episodes 46-50. I created this process by taking my experiences with healing and packaging it for others to start on their healing process.

             Hippocrates said, “Healing is a matter of time, but it is sometimes also a matter of opportunity.” Tools and workshops, my 5-step process, professional counseling, etc. these are the opportunity.

             I posted a question on Facebook and asked my friends what they do to heal. I got a tremendous response and it varied from journaling to drinking, to be forgiving of myself and of others, allow yourself to grieve, acknowledge your higher power and on and on. I think I was simply most impressed by how thoroughly people had created ways to heal. It was beautiful, detailed, thorough.

             The creation of the Love Your Story movement started from a place of healing. It was about me healing and learning to love my story and wanting to help other people do the same thing. Not to take the place of Christ as the master healer, of course, but as tangible steps I a mortal world to help us process our grief, our discomfort, our shame, our regrets, our own inevitable human messiness.

             To love ourselves fully we must come to love and accept our stories. Finding their beauty and meaning, despite, and even because of, the valleys of darkness we have walked through. This is key to being whole. Love your story. Love yourself.

             After our wounds have sat with us for awhile, not while they are raw, but after time has dulled the terrible pains, there comes a space of needing to make peace with the experience. Let me share these 5 steps to reframe and heal from our sacred and terrible places. That way we aren’t just talking in generalized terms about healing, but I’m actually giving you actionable steps that you can take.

             Step 1 – Accept it

              

             Most life stories turn out drastically different than we plan for or expect. That is the nature of the adventure of life. No one plans for heartbreak, disease, loss, abuse and the cadre of other experiences that take us off the course we have planned for ourselves and our happily-ever-afters. In my research, only 1 out of 20 people had lives that turned out as they thought they would. The first key to loving your story is to truly accept that you are not the only one. You’re not alone in the unexpected trajectory of life; your path has been and will be full of both the good and the bad. That’s how it is for everyone and you’re no different. Even the people who look like they have it all, don’t. Life is messy and that’s okay. Accept it. Accept yourself. Accept your own pain, your own experiences, your losses and your beautiful self.  It’s our starting point.

             Debbie Ford said, “The greatest act of courage is to be and own all that you are. Without apology, without excuses, and without one’s masks to cover the truth of who you really are.”

             There’s nothing that we can do to change the past. We get to sift out the gold from the dross and then move forward in full acceptance. Because we can change the future.

             Step 2 – Claim Your Story

              

             Shame causes us to hide, and as we hide our stories, the characters loom larger and uglier in the dark. When we tell our stories we rip away the curtains covering the events, we claim them as they are, and we let the light shine on the reality. When we do this we often find others who have similar experiences, or we simply own them and their power fades in the light. What was once a looming dragon is unveiled to be less sinister as we claim it, say it out loud, and feel the emotion it creates. Telling the story is the beginning of healing.

             Telling your story can mean different things. I’m not suggesting posting it to Facebook is a good idea. What I mean is say it out loud in a safe place. This may be a professional, a friend, a stranger, a life coach.

             Tell the story. Feel the emotion. Let it be what it is, but say it out loud.

             In Ohio I told stories I’d said out loud to very few people. It was terrifying. If was freeing. It was paramount to being able to accept them. But the safe place to do this is in a place of non-judgement. With someone who can let you tell the story and simply let it be what it is.

             Step 3 -Find Meaning and Purpose in Your Experience

              

             When events happen in our lives, caused by either ourselves or others, there is always something that can be learned. This might be the most important step in the process.

             For me the culminating purpose or meaning that I identified for my story as a whole was simply that all the things I had gone through – the heart break, the betrayal, the guilt, the fear, the abuse, the abandonment, the struggles of a single mother, the loneliness, led me to a place of greater understanding, empathy, and broader experience that allows me to connect with a larger range of people. Finding meaning for me was not about excusing anyone, not even myself, it was simply acknowledging the greater take-away and what that meant to my personal development, my personal goals, and my acceptance of my own story –my own life path, even the parts, maybe especially the parts I did not control.

             Your meaning will be very personal to you, but when you can find meaning to your suffering, it ceases to be just suffering. It begins to take on the expanded life that allows for the reframe.

             When Viktor Frankle helped his patient realize that his wife’s death meant she did not have to suffer without him as she would have if he had died first, it gave his suffering meaning.

             When Annadel Lemon, in episode 65, created a platform to help others forgive and heal from their life tragedies it gave meaning to her father’s murder of her mother and his subsequent suicide, because she created something from the ashes of her broken family.

             When Tammy Johnson, in episode 60, focused on her son’s death as a release from his depression and struggle rather than the deep loss of this 16 year-old high school student, she created meaning that allows her to find peace.

             What meaning do your sacred wounds hold?

             Step 4 – Look at Other Points of View

              

             We each grow up with a set up lenses we look through to see and interpret events in our lives. These lenses include our religion, our gender, our socio-economic standing, our education, our culture, our race, our families, our sexual experience, what side of the tracks we live on, etc.  No set of these is the exact same for any one person. These lenses, stacked one on top of the other, give us our views of the world – like a set of glasses with a stack of a dozen lenses. Once we come to understand this, it is easy to see how others around us can interpret life events differently than we do. Taking off your glasses, and making an attempt to look through another set of lenses can lead to an increased understanding and empathy for others and their part in your story.

             Consider these questions:

             1. Did the other person do they best they knew how to do at the time?
             2. Considering their lenses, how might they have interpreted, seen, or justified their role in your story?
             3. If you had been in their shoes, would you have possibly behaved in a similar way?
             4. What would that have looked like?
             5. What do you feel for the others in your story? Anger? Empathy? Feel Sorry for them? Fear? Understanding? Sadness? Forgiveness?

             
             

             While not all of these questions may apply to you and your story, it is a place to start in broadening perspective as you prepare to reframe.

             Step 5 -Reframe

              

             With these new perspectives, how does your story change? How do you see it differently? What new insights help you see it differently?

             Reframing is often not a one-person exercise. We are quite entrenched in the perspectives of our own stories, so if you need help to see different angles and perceptions of the event, find someone to work with you – a therapist, a life coach, a friend, a loved one. Someone that is detached enough from your story to be honest with you. Someone who will be able to suggest new perspectives, and honest enough to do so will be important.

             Retell the story from a different perspective, with a broadened understanding. How does the story change?

              

             Oprah Winfrey said, “Every person carries her own story of hope and sorrow, victory and loss, redemption, joy and light. Everyone has had her share of life lessons. How well you learn from them is up to you. When you choose to see the world as a classroom, you understand that all experiences are here to teach you something about yourself. And that your life’s journey is about becoming more of who you are. Another miracle: We all get to share in the journey. The hardest experiences are often the ones that teach us the most. Whenever trouble comes my way I try to ask myself: “What is this really about, and what am I supposed to learn from it?” Only when I perceive what the real lesson is can I make the best decision and grow from the experience. After everything that’s happened to me in all my years on this earth, what I’m most proud of is that I remain open to evolving. I know that every physical encounter has a metaphysical meaning. And I’m open to seeing it all.”

             The miracle of healing- of transforming our darkest places into such things as peace, acceptance, increased light, understanding, patience, empathy, and love—is always a process. It is a process guided and supported by God who always seeks to heal us, to love us, to hold our hand as we grow. It is a process of chosen opportunity, as Hippocrates said. It is a process of time, forgiveness, gentleness with ourselves and tremendous growth.

             Talie Wehr, a life coach who lives in Ohio, shared with me some of the things she does to heal. She said, “I connect to the support around me.  I make a gratitude list. Journal. Self-care. Create healthy routines or get super consistent with the ones that I already have. I let God comfort me. Be gentle with myself. Write a letter of forgiveness even if I don’t send it. Acknowledge that God is the judge, not me (seeing myself actually get down from the judge’s bench, and give the gavel to God helps me let go and forgive) I do things creatively that I deeply enjoy (dance, paint, cook, design, hike). I be a...]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3074Wed, 25 Apr 2018 09:00:52 -070029:45falsefullHealing is a cyclical event. We don’t do it once. We do it over and over. As I ponder on this topic I think about all the people I have interviewed – people who have lost children to hiking accidents, car accidents, suicide. People who have lost spouses and parents to murder and suicide. A woman with an eating disorder and a man whose father tried to kill him as a child in order to prove himself a prophet in God’s eyes. This is just the tip of the iceberg. The stories are raw, powerful, and illustrate people who found ways to stand up, heal, and move on to make the world better, to make their own lives better, and to rise from the ashes of pain, loss, betrayal and self-loathing. Today’s conversation is about healing, because it’s a part of every story, and the alternative is to suffer.Lori LeeEpisode 83 Interview Wendy Garrett – Life is Tough, but I’m TougherEpisode 83 Interview Wendy Garrett – Life is Tough, but I’m Tougher

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast,  episode 83 where I’m talking with Wendy Garrett.

             When one has a paralyzed limb it’s unlikely that you’ll see them running, but it’s even less likely that you’ll see them running a marathon, but even less likely than that is that they will be competing in the major world marathons, but that’s the story we get to hear today. Stay tuned to find out about Wendy’s accident, the long process to discovering why she couldn’t use her leg, and the way it has become possible for her to get the support she needs to walk and run on her own.

             From the age of 6 to her retirement at age 23 Wendy Garrett was a competitive gymnast. She attended Utah State University where she got her degree in Sports and Exercise Science, and after her retirement from gymnastics, she began running as a way to stay active. For her, this was ½ marathon and marathons and she became a full-time gymnastics coach which took her to San Diego, to Austin, Texas, and to beautiful Bermuda. This was where the motor accident happened that took the use of her left leg.

             Listen to the podcast to hear Wendy tell her story about the accident, how she was finally diagnosed, and the way she found herself living her dream of running six world major marathons and traveling around the world.

             She discusses having patience for God’s timing and how he can create for us something that is more beautiful than what we can create for ourselves.

             To follow her: Instagram: wendygbird22

             ]]>Episode 83 Interview Wendy Garrett – Life is Tough, but I’m Tougher

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast,  episode 83 where I’m talking with Wendy Garrett.

             When one has a paralyzed limb it’s unlikely that you’ll see them running, but it’s even less likely that you’ll see them running a marathon, but even less likely than that is that they will be competing in the major world marathons, but that’s the story we get to hear today. Stay tuned to find out about Wendy’s accident, the long process to discovering why she couldn’t use her leg, and the way it has become possible for her to get the support she needs to walk and run on her own.

             From the age of 6 to her retirement at age 23 Wendy Garrett was a competitive gymnast. She attended Utah State University where she got her degree in Sports and Exercise Science, and after her retirement from gymnastics, she began running as a way to stay active. For her, this was ½ marathon and marathons and she became a full-time gymnastics coach which took her to San Diego, to Austin, Texas, and to beautiful Bermuda. This was where the motor accident happened that took the use of her left leg.

             Listen to the podcast to hear Wendy tell her story about the accident, how she was finally diagnosed, and the way she found herself living her dream of running six world major marathons and traveling around the world.

             She discusses having patience for God’s timing and how he can create for us something that is more beautiful than what we can create for ourselves.

             To follow her: Instagram: wendygbird22

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=3055Wed, 18 Apr 2018 09:00:03 -070043:57falsefullWendy Garrett was a lifetime gymnast and gymnastics coach until an auto accident in Bermuda left her left leg paralyzed. Tune in for her story and her process of learning to trust God, his timing, and his bigger picture for us. Life is tough, but I am tougher, was her refrain as she shares what it took, and takes, to make it through those spaces in our story where we are up against the antagonists of our lives.Lori LeeEpisode 82: Hearing From Those Inside the 21-Day ChallengeHearing From Those Inside the 21-Day Challenge

             The 21-Day Challenge launched in January and I wanted to give you a peek into what the challenge has been creating for those who have jumped on the bandwagon and accepted the challenge.

             Today’s episode contains stories from four of the 21-Day Challenge participants so you can hear about some of the challenges, you can hear what the participants think of the challenges, and you can get a feel for the type of experiences being generated. I hope you’ll enjoy the stories they shared…I know I did.

             And I’d love to have you join us on the inside and start creating these powerful experiences in your own life. Join the 21-Day Challenge by going to the website and signing up:

             www.loveyourstorypodcast.com

             Fantastic bargain at only $39 and worth so much more! Create possibility, connection, and peace in your own life story!

             See you on the inside….

             Thanks to all participants who shared their experiences.

             ]]>Hearing From Those Inside the 21-Day Challenge

             The 21-Day Challenge launched in January and I wanted to give you a peek into what the challenge has been creating for those who have jumped on the bandwagon and accepted the challenge.

             Today’s episode contains stories from four of the 21-Day Challenge participants so you can hear about some of the challenges, you can hear what the participants think of the challenges, and you can get a feel for the type of experiences being generated. I hope you’ll enjoy the stories they shared…I know I did.

             And I’d love to have you join us on the inside and start creating these powerful experiences in your own life. Join the 21-Day Challenge by going to the website and signing up:

             www.loveyourstorypodcast.com

             Fantastic bargain at only $39 and worth so much more! Create possibility, connection, and peace in your own life story!

             See you on the inside….

             Thanks to all participants who shared their experiences.

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2986Wed, 11 Apr 2018 09:00:17 -070023:44falsefullThe 21-Day Challenge launched in January and I wanted to give you a peek into what the challenge has been creating for those who have jumped on the bandwagon and accepted the challenge.<br /> <br /> Today's episode contains stories from four of the 21-Day Challenge participants so you can hear about some of the challenges, you can hear what the participants think of the challenges, and you can get a feel for the type of experiences being generated. I hope you'll enjoy the stories they shared...I know I did. Powerful stuff!Lori LeeEpisode 81 Relative Race: Interview with the host Dan Debenham -Reality TV Helping People Find FamilyRelative Race: Interview with the host Dan Debenham -Reality TV Helping People Find Family

             Today I’m sitting at Roots Tech, the genealogy tradeshow at the Salt Palace in the capital of Utah, Salt Lake City. Dan Debenham, the host of the popular and highly acclaimed reality TV show Relative Race, and I, are sitting inside a bright lime green car, used by one of the teams in the reality show. We are sitting in here as a type of sound booth, so we can talk about the show, get the stories of the family members found, of the season highlights, and hear about people finding the characters in their stories that they didn’t even know were a part of their stories.

             Tune in to this week’s podcast for our discussion and see the links below to watch past episodes or follow Relative Race.

             @RelativeRace

             https://www.byutv.org/relativerace

             https://www.byutv.org/player/d294ba93-f5d4-4420-8953-77d974e34470/relative-race-season-3-episode-1

             https://www.byutv.org/relativerace

             ]]>Relative Race: Interview with the host Dan Debenham -Reality TV Helping People Find Family

             Today I’m sitting at Roots Tech, the genealogy tradeshow at the Salt Palace in the capital of Utah, Salt Lake City. Dan Debenham, the host of the popular and highly acclaimed reality TV show Relative Race, and I, are sitting inside a bright lime green car, used by one of the teams in the reality show. We are sitting in here as a type of sound booth, so we can talk about the show, get the stories of the family members found, of the season highlights, and hear about people finding the characters in their stories that they didn’t even know were a part of their stories.

             Tune in to this week’s podcast for our discussion and see the links below to watch past episodes or follow Relative Race.

             @RelativeRace

             https://www.byutv.org/relativerace

             https://www.byutv.org/player/d294ba93-f5d4-4420-8953-77d974e34470/relative-race-season-3-episode-1

             https://www.byutv.org/relativerace

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2946Wed, 04 Apr 2018 09:00:58 -070034:26falsefullToday I'm sitting at Roots Tech, the genealogy tradeshow at the Salt Palace in the capital of Utah, Salt Lake City. Dan Debenham, the host of the popular and highly acclaimed reality TV show Relative Race, and I, are sitting inside a bright lime green car, used by one of the teams in the reality show. We are sitting in here as a type of sound booth, so we can talk about the show, get the stories of the family members found, of the season highlights, and hear about people finding the characters in their stories that they didn't even know were a part of their stories.  Lori LeeEpisode 80 Interview with Diane Butterfield – Part 2: You Can’t Choose What Happens to You, but You Can Choose How You RespondInterview with Diane Butterfield – Part 2

             You Can’t Choose What Happens to You, But You Can Choose How You Respond

              

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today is episode 80, which ends a 2-part series of interviews with Diane Butterfield. I’ve given this story 2 episodes because it’s long, it’s intense, and around every corner, there is another twist to the plot, another funeral, another dragon to be slain. If you’ve ever thought life was not fair, well…you’re in good company with today’s interviewee… If you’re just joining us, go back and listen to episode 79 first so you can get the first part of the story.

             On her fridge, there’s a sign that says, “Fair is something you go to  in the fall.”  But one thing Diane is clear about is that while she is not in charge of what happens to her she is totally in charge of how she gets to act and react. In today’s episode we deal with suicide and finding your way forward when you find half your family in the cemetary. Stayed tuned for the rest of the story.

             Tune into this series for her story of infertility, job loss, tragic car accidents and the loss of her children and her husband. But you’ll also hear about tender mercies, miracles, hope and perseverance that inspires.

             ]]>Interview with Diane Butterfield – Part 2

             You Can’t Choose What Happens to You, But You Can Choose How You Respond

              

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today is episode 80, which ends a 2-part series of interviews with Diane Butterfield. I’ve given this story 2 episodes because it’s long, it’s intense, and around every corner, there is another twist to the plot, another funeral, another dragon to be slain. If you’ve ever thought life was not fair, well…you’re in good company with today’s interviewee… If you’re just joining us, go back and listen to episode 79 first so you can get the first part of the story.

             On her fridge, there’s a sign that says, “Fair is something you go to  in the fall.”  But one thing Diane is clear about is that while she is not in charge of what happens to her she is totally in charge of how she gets to act and react. In today’s episode we deal with suicide and finding your way forward when you find half your family in the cemetary. Stayed tuned for the rest of the story.

             Tune into this series for her story of infertility, job loss, tragic car accidents and the loss of her children and her husband. But you’ll also hear about tender mercies, miracles, hope and perseverance that inspires.

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2922Wed, 28 Mar 2018 09:00:50 -070046:01falsefullWelcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today is episode 80, which ends a 2-part series of interviews with Diane Butterfield. So far in her story we've learned of her infertility, the creation of her family, the loss of two of her children and the struggle to survive job loss and bankruptcy amidst it all. If you're just joining us, go back and listen to episode 79 first so you can get the first part of the story. Today we follow Diane through the suicide, perseverance, and finding hope....eventually. This series keeps it real - sometimes healing is a long process, but we can choose our response to the most difficult and painful life events.Lori LeeEpisode 79 Interview with Diane Butterfield: Part 1 – You Can’t Choose What Happens to You, but You Can Choose How You RespondInterview with Diane Butterfield – Part 1

             You Can’t Choose What Happens to You, But You Can Choose How You Respond

              

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today is episode 79, which starts a 2-part series of interviews with Diane Butterfield. I’ve given this story 2 episodes because it’s long, it’s intense, and around every corner, there is another twist to the plot, another funeral, another dragon to be slain. If you’ve ever thought life was not fair, well…you’re in good company with today’s interviewee…

             On her fridge, there’s a sign that says, “Fair is something you go to  in the fall.”  But one thing Diane is clear about is that while she is not in charge of what happens to her she is totally in charge of how she gets to act and react. Stayed tuned for the story.

             Tune into the podcast for her story of infertility, job loss, tragic car accidents and the loss of her children. But you’ll also hear about tender mercies and perseverance that inspires.

              

             ]]>Interview with Diane Butterfield – Part 1

             You Can’t Choose What Happens to You, But You Can Choose How You Respond

              

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Today is episode 79, which starts a 2-part series of interviews with Diane Butterfield. I’ve given this story 2 episodes because it’s long, it’s intense, and around every corner, there is another twist to the plot, another funeral, another dragon to be slain. If you’ve ever thought life was not fair, well…you’re in good company with today’s interviewee…

             On her fridge, there’s a sign that says, “Fair is something you go to  in the fall.”  But one thing Diane is clear about is that while she is not in charge of what happens to her she is totally in charge of how she gets to act and react. Stayed tuned for the story.

             Tune into the podcast for her story of infertility, job loss, tragic car accidents and the loss of her children. But you’ll also hear about tender mercies and perseverance that inspires.

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2875Wed, 21 Mar 2018 09:00:08 -070035:18falsefullDiane Butterfield's story wracked my heart. A woman who lives in Northern Utah with a sign on her fridge that says "Fair is something you go to in the fall." If anyone feels life has treated them unfairly, listen in to Diane's story for a staggering dose of tragedy and loss of half of her family, and the inspirational picture of how one woman chose, on purpose, how to keep going despite tremendous loss and struggle. I share her story because it illustrates a woman's journey through the darkest spaces and the choices to stand back up each time.Lori LeeEpisode 78 Interview Ganel-Lyn Condie-Trust the ProcessEpisode 78: Interview with Ganel-Lyn Condie

             One of the things that I believe that we run up against in this day in age is the issue of self-condemnation, comparison, expectations,  – we live in a cultural space of doing it all; a social media space of seeing it all – all the great vacations, all the great relationship tributes, all the perfectly prepared meals and nicely decorated homes, the business accolades of associates and friends, the award banquets and the celebrations – all wonderful things, but of course, only part of the story. We should earn good money, we should be good parents, we should create good in the world by starting a non-profit that will save the starving orphans in Africa and stop the sex trade. And, don’t forget, you should look hip, thin, and extremely put together while doing it. There are moral and ethical realms that we should be topping out on, and of course, everyone else seems to be pulling it off in a sense of knowing and purpose.

             I’m always talking about how life is Messy – I have a whole podcast episode on this – episode 8 – Life is Messy and that’s Okay; so when I hear speakers or read books with the message that WE ARE ALREADY OKAY AND DOING GREAT, when I find messages that allow for our realness and our learning and our self-acceptance and self-love as our story unfolds it strikes a cord. It feels good. I eat it up.

             Ganel-Lyn Condie has a talk out on CD called You Are Already Walking on Water, and a new book coming out called You Are More Than Enough, if that’s all I knew about Ganel-Lyn I’d definitely want to talk to her, but she was also the Managing Editor at Wasatch Woman magazine when I wrote for them,  so we’ve got some background. I’ll let Ganel-Lyn tell you how she got from there to being the author of 7 books, becoming a popular motivational speaker known for inspiring others with her unique honesty, authenticity and spirit,.and we’ll get into a discussion on TIMING, on KNOWING YOU ARE ENOUGH, and ultimately on TRUSTING THE PROCESS.

             Tune in to my interview with Ganel-Lyn.

             Find her work and more information on her on the following links:

             www.ganellyn.com

             https://www.facebook.com/GanelLyn/

              

              

             ]]>Episode 78: Interview with Ganel-Lyn Condie

             One of the things that I believe that we run up against in this day in age is the issue of self-condemnation, comparison, expectations,  – we live in a cultural space of doing it all; a social media space of seeing it all – all the great vacations, all the great relationship tributes, all the perfectly prepared meals and nicely decorated homes, the business accolades of associates and friends, the award banquets and the celebrations – all wonderful things, but of course, only part of the story. We should earn good money, we should be good parents, we should create good in the world by starting a non-profit that will save the starving orphans in Africa and stop the sex trade. And, don’t forget, you should look hip, thin, and extremely put together while doing it. There are moral and ethical realms that we should be topping out on, and of course, everyone else seems to be pulling it off in a sense of knowing and purpose.

             I’m always talking about how life is Messy – I have a whole podcast episode on this – episode 8 – Life is Messy and that’s Okay; so when I hear speakers or read books with the message that WE ARE ALREADY OKAY AND DOING GREAT, when I find messages that allow for our realness and our learning and our self-acceptance and self-love as our story unfolds it strikes a cord. It feels good. I eat it up.

             Ganel-Lyn Condie has a talk out on CD called You Are Already Walking on Water, and a new book coming out called You Are More Than Enough, if that’s all I knew about Ganel-Lyn I’d definitely want to talk to her, but she was also the Managing Editor at Wasatch Woman magazine when I wrote for them,  so we’ve got some background. I’ll let Ganel-Lyn tell you how she got from there to being the author of 7 books, becoming a popular motivational speaker known for inspiring others with her unique honesty, authenticity and spirit,.and we’ll get into a discussion on TIMING, on KNOWING YOU ARE ENOUGH, and ultimately on TRUSTING THE PROCESS.

             Tune in to my interview with Ganel-Lyn.

             Find her work and more information on her on the following links:

             www.ganellyn.com

             https://www.facebook.com/GanelLyn/

              

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2791Wed, 14 Mar 2018 09:00:01 -070048:37falsefullGanel-Lyn Condie has a talk out on CD called You Are Already Walking on Water, and a new book coming out called You Are More Than Enough, if that’s all I knew about Ganel-Lyn I’d definitely want to talk to her, because I love the people who celebrate our human realness and uplift as we seek to find our way through the messiness of life. This interview with Ganel-Lyn is an inspiring story where we learn how she went from being a managing editor to being the author of 7 books, becoming a popular motivational speaker known for inspiring others with her unique honesty, authenticity and spirit,.and then we’ll get into a discussion on TIMING, on KNOWING YOU ARE ENOUGH, and ultimately on TRUSTING THE PROCESS. Tune in!Lori LeeEpisode 77 Interview with Mark Asquith – BUSINESS – Origin Stories: The past defining the futureInterview with Mark Asquith – Origin Stories: The past defining the future

             Every story has a life, and every life has a story.  Today on the Love Your Story podcast I bring to you Mark Asquith, from England, successful entrepreneur also known as the Hot Dog kid. Why do I bring this up – the incident with the hot dog? Because it’s a catalytic story in Mark’s life that made such an impact that over 20 years later it still helps him define what he wants, who he is, and who he isn’t. Stay tuned for my interview with Mark and find out how a sausage can shape your personal brand.

             Mark Asquith, owner of Excellence Expected, Podcast Websites, and the 7-Minute Mentor podcast, is here today to share HIS story. I don’t want to give away too much, so I’ll let him tell it. From formative grade school experiences to successful business man and international speaker, I’ve asked Mark to share his story with my audience because it’s a prime example of the impact story can have in defining who we become and how we go about creating our lives.

             Tune in to the podcast for Mark’s story.

             Check him out at:

             excellence-expected.com

             podcastwebsites.com

             Twitter: @Mrasquith

             Facebook: www.facebook.com/mrasquith

             LinkedIn: Mark Asquith

             Instagram: mrasquith

             ]]>Interview with Mark Asquith – Origin Stories: The past defining the future

             Every story has a life, and every life has a story.  Today on the Love Your Story podcast I bring to you Mark Asquith, from England, successful entrepreneur also known as the Hot Dog kid. Why do I bring this up – the incident with the hot dog? Because it’s a catalytic story in Mark’s life that made such an impact that over 20 years later it still helps him define what he wants, who he is, and who he isn’t. Stay tuned for my interview with Mark and find out how a sausage can shape your personal brand.

             Mark Asquith, owner of Excellence Expected, Podcast Websites, and the 7-Minute Mentor podcast, is here today to share HIS story. I don’t want to give away too much, so I’ll let him tell it. From formative grade school experiences to successful business man and international speaker, I’ve asked Mark to share his story with my audience because it’s a prime example of the impact story can have in defining who we become and how we go about creating our lives.

             Tune in to the podcast for Mark’s story.

             Check him out at:

             excellence-expected.com

             podcastwebsites.com

             Twitter: @Mrasquith

             Facebook: www.facebook.com/mrasquith

             LinkedIn: Mark Asquith

             Instagram: mrasquith

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2778Wed, 07 Mar 2018 09:00:16 -070031:53falsefullEvery story has a life, and every life has a story.  Today on the Love Your Story podcast I bring to you Mark Asquith, from England, successful entrepreneur also known as the Hot Dog kid. Why do I bring this up – the incident with the hot dog? Because it’s a catalytic story in Mark’s life that made such an impact that over 20 years later it still helps him define what he wants, who he is, and who he isn’t. Stay tuned for my interview with Mark and find out how a sausage can shape your personal brand.Lori LeeEpisode 76 Body Talk – Stories from the Inner CriticBody Talk – Stories from the Inner Critic

             Looking in the mirror has for many, become one of the most uncomfortable things we do. Uncomfortable because the minute we do the inner critic hammers away. It’s universal. You’re not alone. Criticizing the physical form we each inhabit is a rampant and pervasive story no matter where you live or who you are. Keep listening for a discussion on body talk, recrafting body stories, and why we’re all in this together.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

             Now, I love my body – it’s taken me up mountains, down mountains, across lakes, across deserts, down canyons, across dance floors, into incredible intimacy, and anywhere I directed it to go. It’s strong and healthy and with the exception of accidents that left me broken, it always has been strong and healthy. I’ve been blessed beyond measure. I’ve been able to see the world, loved ones, trees, scenic views and blooming flowers in all their colors, sunsets and sunrises, the depth in another person’s eyes, and all the amazing things we take for granted every day. I’ve been able to hug people I care about. I’ve been able to feel the music and let my body respond, I’ve been able to hear people express ideas, teach, complain. I’ve heard dogs bark, music play. I’ve been able to taste and enjoy delicious foods, and smell pine needles and Christmas candles, cookies and a steak on the BBQ. Confession: There have been times when I’ve been down enough that the idea of leaving this life was something I toyed with. But during one of those times of considering the viability of living, I realized that if I left I’d have to leave my body behind and I couldn’t bear to do that.

             Now, that being said, I have a nice little entourage of body critiques that play over and over when I’m around a mirror. Lots of them have to do with aging, there’s one about weight, that my eyes are beady, or my forehead is too big, or my nose is too long, or … a bunch of stuff that I get to learn how to recognize as body assault chatter, and then remember that it’s the love and energy that we put out into the world, not the details of our wonderful bodies that determine our beauty and attractive natures.

             One of the difficulties of changing our body-image mindsets is that living in a culture of body perfection expectation there will always be negative feedback – real or felt that comes at us. We have to become so full of acceptance and love of our own bodies that the negative societal feedback or expectation that gets flung around has less chance of sticking. I KNOW. Easier said than done, but we are discussing the whole picture here. Let me share a personal story about negative body image feedback.

             When I was in 7^th grade, a very formative age of social awareness and self-awareness, I had a geography teacher who thought he was a funny fellow and liked to tease the girls in the class that were his class favorites. He was the coach for the boys’ basketball team, and my friend and I were starters on the girls’ basketball team, so we often received the brunt of his jokes. He teased us daily, but one day, in front of all our peers, he told us we had elephant noses. He thought that was awesome fun, and proceeded to throw that out. “Hey elephant nose,” he’d yell across the classroom when he wanted our attention. We were little girls who hadn’t grown into all our features, but having an adult, in front of all the peers for whom we hoped to be extremely cool, disparage how we looked was embarrassing. Humiliating,...]]>Body Talk – Stories from the Inner Critic

             Looking in the mirror has for many, become one of the most uncomfortable things we do. Uncomfortable because the minute we do the inner critic hammers away. It’s universal. You’re not alone. Criticizing the physical form we each inhabit is a rampant and pervasive story no matter where you live or who you are. Keep listening for a discussion on body talk, recrafting body stories, and why we’re all in this together.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

             Now, I love my body – it’s taken me up mountains, down mountains, across lakes, across deserts, down canyons, across dance floors, into incredible intimacy, and anywhere I directed it to go. It’s strong and healthy and with the exception of accidents that left me broken, it always has been strong and healthy. I’ve been blessed beyond measure. I’ve been able to see the world, loved ones, trees, scenic views and blooming flowers in all their colors, sunsets and sunrises, the depth in another person’s eyes, and all the amazing things we take for granted every day. I’ve been able to hug people I care about. I’ve been able to feel the music and let my body respond, I’ve been able to hear people express ideas, teach, complain. I’ve heard dogs bark, music play. I’ve been able to taste and enjoy delicious foods, and smell pine needles and Christmas candles, cookies and a steak on the BBQ. Confession: There have been times when I’ve been down enough that the idea of leaving this life was something I toyed with. But during one of those times of considering the viability of living, I realized that if I left I’d have to leave my body behind and I couldn’t bear to do that.

             Now, that being said, I have a nice little entourage of body critiques that play over and over when I’m around a mirror. Lots of them have to do with aging, there’s one about weight, that my eyes are beady, or my forehead is too big, or my nose is too long, or … a bunch of stuff that I get to learn how to recognize as body assault chatter, and then remember that it’s the love and energy that we put out into the world, not the details of our wonderful bodies that determine our beauty and attractive natures.

             One of the difficulties of changing our body-image mindsets is that living in a culture of body perfection expectation there will always be negative feedback – real or felt that comes at us. We have to become so full of acceptance and love of our own bodies that the negative societal feedback or expectation that gets flung around has less chance of sticking. I KNOW. Easier said than done, but we are discussing the whole picture here. Let me share a personal story about negative body image feedback.

             When I was in 7^th grade, a very formative age of social awareness and self-awareness, I had a geography teacher who thought he was a funny fellow and liked to tease the girls in the class that were his class favorites. He was the coach for the boys’ basketball team, and my friend and I were starters on the girls’ basketball team, so we often received the brunt of his jokes. He teased us daily, but one day, in front of all our peers, he told us we had elephant noses. He thought that was awesome fun, and proceeded to throw that out. “Hey elephant nose,” he’d yell across the classroom when he wanted our attention. We were little girls who hadn’t grown into all our features, but having an adult, in front of all the peers for whom we hoped to be extremely cool, disparage how we looked was embarrassing. Humiliating, really. I’ve never forgotten it. We’ve all probably got a similar story of someone in our lives mocking or finding fault with something about the way we look. Too short, too fat, too skinny, too …people can often are very cruel to one another. And then you also have the movies and the magazines that show only the glamorous and set unrealistic photoshopped expectations. Body shaming is maybe one of the toughest and most pervasive of modern challenges because it attacks are very being, which quickly translates into self-worth, self-love, and how we interact with those around us. It’s a killer.

             The relationships we have with our bodies are individual. Different for everyone, very personal. But this discussion, about body stories, is being opened today because we have been given a glorious gift. We have been given bodies that serve us and provide a vehicle for our spirits to experience incredible things, and yet we attack our selves constantly with complaints, comparisons, and criticisms instead of love.

             First, let’s talk about some ideas of why that might be, then we’ll talk about ways to start seeing things – start seeing ourselves – differently.

             Hal and Sidra Stone wrote a book called Embracing Your Inner Critic. Both clinical psychologists, they created the “Voice Dialogue” process, a therapy that gives a platform to the inner critic to talk out loud, bluntly, fiercely, and then they help their clients with tools that can transform it into an ally. Through their work, they have spoken with thousands of inner critics over the past 15 years and one of the universal things the inner critic criticizes – no matter the country, gender, age, race, you name it…is the body.  In their book, they said, “The critique of the physical body is so all-pervasive, so powerful, and exerts such a negative and destructive influence on people’s lives that we want to devote a chapter specifically to this area…”

             They talk about how the inner critic lives in mirrors, it attacks when we are shopping and trying on clothes. People say “I don’t like the shape of my face, or my hips are too big, or my neck is too short or my hair just lies there like a wet dishrag.” My toes are crooked, or my boobs are too small, or too big, or too flabby, or …

             I’d like to point out a couple ideas – open some conversation here.

             1. We live in a culture, in America, with a body image that actually a very small part of the populace can live up to – whether you are male or female. And, for those who fit into that narrow slot of having the ideal body, they really only have it for a span of time when they are at their youthful best. So no one will always have it. Might I point out that that means we have created a monster – a beauty monster that a miniscule part of the population will ever actually emulate, and the rest of the human beings spend all sorts of time in self-criticism, criticism of others, and self-loathing because of a pervasive cultural creation that severely cripples the way we think about, love and accept ourselves. This makes NO sense. Can’t we agree to start to change this? I saw a post on FB the other day that said, “If steroids aren’t allowed for athletes then photoshop shouldn’t be allowed for models.” What if we all got real?
             2. For those of you who are LDS, you’ll understand this next theory: we believe that Satan, and those who followed him, were not given a body – he is just a spirit entity. Because of this he/they are quite envious of all who have bodies, for they will never have one. What do you think of the idea that the “devil on your shoulder” becomes a literal attack – an attempt to create self-loathing over one of the greatest gifts we have: our wonderful bodies that allow us to run, jump, dance, walk, smell, experience connection and climb mountains? The body attacks are one of the most pervasive of the inner critic and I can’t help but think that is generated from a space that is intent on the destruction of self-love and acceptance that did not originate with us. When we are children we are completely unbody conscious. Nakedness doesn’t matter in the slightest. Fat rolls don’t matter in the slightest. I’ve never seen a baby worrying about if his head is too big or if his ears poke out.

             
             

             These judgments on ourselves begin to accumulate as criticisms, judgments, and cultural expectations are recognized. Then the inner critic or Satan or some misguided psychological protective device – whichever you think it is — have a heyday! It has been given all kinds of things to start throwing at us. The more we are given “supposed tos” the more fodder the critic has to throw at us. It’s a dangerous business, especially when you are unaware that it’s a critical construct, not a fact. Especially when those criticisms are believed, fostered, propagated and habitual neural pathways of self loathing are created. These attacks are particularly effective at incapacitating us because it is an attack on the very medium through which we interact with the world – our bodies. If we feel constant disgust or conflict about our physical appearance then already it is stopping us from living fully, engaging fully with others; and our self-consciousness stops us from experiencing the life we could have if we weren’t playing small in an attempt not to draw attention to what we feel insecure about. Have you ever lost a relationship because you were too self-conscious to allow it? Have you ever destroyed a relationship because you were too self-conscious and pulled back? The other day my teenage son confided that he’d felt so insecure all week because his face had broken out in acne and so he dreaded going to school and when he was there he held back from his friends and left their outings early because he was mortified about how he felt about the way he looked. Well, the result was that his girlfriend and he started hitting a rough patch because he wasn’t engaged and fun and all the usual things he is. He wasn’t himself because he was self-conscious over the way he looked. Let me know note here that it wasn’t that bad. His story about his acne was far more serious than the acne. But often times the thing we are most trying to avoid—losing love and acceptance from our peers—because of an internal story regarding some physical insecurity, actually creates the thing we are trying to avoid when those around us, or our loved one or friend couldn’t have cared less about it. Don’t be your own worst enemy.

             I had an interesting experience at one of the weekend coaching retreats I attended a few years back – this weekend was a weekend out in the woods, but we were interacting with people in which we wanted to look our best and there was a lot of vulnerability going on, and in my book it’s always best to feel comfortable with how you look when you are making yourself emotionally and mentally vulnerable. Well, once I got there I realized I hadn’t brought the things I needed to do my hair. No one else had the right size curling iron, I was stuck with really having nothing to work with on this front. I was not happy about it, who likes to look bedraggled? Well it was SOOO not ideal and I was very disappointed, but I couldn’t do anything about it, so I made a conscious decision to not be self-conscious – to not focus on myself. I simply would banish any thoughts of my own looks and focus on others and being present to the work we were doing. Well, I did it. There were times I actively had to redirect my focus, but I did it and two interesting things happened.

             1. I noticed that the less I thought about myself the happier I was. I was brighter and more loving and less self involved. That was a fun feeling. I can do that just fine when I feel like I look good, but to do it when you know you look bedraggled is a whole different game. But it was a really cool feeling.
             2. A few weeks later my coach, who was at this retreat, made a comment about how absolutely beautiful I was that weekend. Now, I had not mentioned anything to her about my predicament, my self-consciousness, my decision to focus outward. She didn’t know anything about it, so when she made this comment to me later I was forcefully struck. Is it possible that the light that comes from us when we are less concerned about ourselves and any critical analysis of our bodies we might make, and more tuned in to joy, and light and self-acceptance, that we actually become more beautiful? Hmmmmm.

             
             

             No matter how we look, even the most “beautiful” people have these critical voices. And no matter how many “imperfections” we might fix, there will always be another way that we fall short of some culturally created expectation that erroneously has created some meter for measuring the physical ideal and what gets equated as being worthy of love, acceptance, and success. Even if someone is perfectly satisfied with their appearance at age 20, age will eventually catch up with them and generate discontent. Everyone is going to have to face this particular story and decide how they are going to handle it.

             Let me also point out a fact about cultural body-image expectations. In the middle ages, the women who were considered most beautiful were those who were plump, well rounded, curvaceous. You can see this in the paintings and the sculptures. This was the preferred body form because to be fat meant that you were well-to-do, you could afford food. You were of the desired class. In the 1920’s the rage was that all the prettiest women were flappers, like Twiggy the model. Very thin, very flat chested, very boy-like. Twiggy was given her name because she looked like a stick. Depending upon when you were born, even where you were born, the beauty gauge was and is different. I have a friend who points out that if she were born in the middle ages she would have been a goddess. She focuses on her beauty, not on criticisms or self-consciousness.

             My friend Liz who is doing amazing body-love work around her weight said, “I think the trick is finding some way to be at peace with our physical selves regardless of how acceptable or well matched we are to whatever a person’s societal idea is. That way we can embrace physical imperfections and the inevitable changes that come with age as simply another part of ourselves that we appreciate, admire and love. We can appreciate our bodies as a magnificent or imperfect extension of our best inner selves. Now, of course, this is much easier said than done, in large part because of those internal insecurities we’ve grappled with our whole lives, and in part, because external forces are constantly reinforcing unhealthy expectations. But I think the secret to overcoming the influence of external negativity and expectation is learning to manage and refute unhealthy internal thoughts or stories, from that critical voice.” She goes on to point out that when we get or create negative feedback about ourselves and we hear them day after day, year after year they cause deep and defining damage.

             In Oprah Winfrey’s book What I Know For Sure,  she has a chapter on her experience with body hate and love. Tune in to the audio for my reading of her thoughts

             So what is the secret to being at peace with ourselves as we are?

             The truth is that that is going to be an individual journey for each of us. I could not guarantee one method that would solve all the body shame in the world, but let’s start with one of the biggies – the most powerful: the stories we tell ourselves determine how we feel about ourselves. Be careful with the stories and complaints you allow that inner critic to play on rewind. Like any reprogramming of our internal stories, we must first become aware that the long-held belief that you see as fact, that negative criticism you have about your body can be seen in a different way: being short doesn’t have to mean you are less, being fat isn’t a moral failure, having a long neck can be considered an asset.  What if you accept that the social stereotypes are NOT a fact? No cultural declaration of beauty has anything to do with fact.  While you may not be able to change a cultural view, you can certainly change your own acceptance and view of yourself and find your own peace.  Being open to reframing those internal stories means that as you are aware of the biting comments as they assault you, you replace them with new stories that serve and celebrate you. Stories of acceptance. “I am beautiful just the way I am.” “I love and accept myself and embrace my personal beauty.”  “I release my self-judgments and replace them with loving appreciation.” “Thank you body for taking me where I want to go; for helping me to experience life.” “I grow more and more beautiful every day.”  With this repetition, your views and acceptance levels shift. They really do, but it takes time. For me it also helps to realize that beauty is so individual – I don’t mean to be rude, but most people aren’t that good looking anyway. We’re all just a mix of features and we are going to connect with people of all shapes and sizes differently. Why feel bad about who we are, or make others feel bad about who they are. Most people are just pretty average looking and the thing that really sets us apart in the most meaningful way is the way we carry ourselves, our spirit and energy  – I truly believe these create the real beauty in a person. You’ve seen it – when someone carries themselves with confidence and pride, when they are focused on others and filled with joy rather than self-consciousness – they emanate a spirit and energy that attracts others, that makes you want to be around them.

             Recognizing and giving credence to these facts are the basis for a foundation of shifting. Recognizing and allowing for our self-worth and self-love beyond pervasive and dangerous weavings of a destructive cultural construct is the first step to self-acceptance.

             My friend Liz, who has felt the social and cultural judgments about her weight since she was young said,  “It’s not intuitive for a lot of people, and it comes easily to no one to make these adjustments in self-judgment. Up until very recently the idea of accepting my body as it is, rather than holding on hope I could change it, felt impossible. Blasphemous. Radical. It made me angry because the very suggestion seemed to imply a failing of moral and emotional strength. An unforgivable physical shame. It implied that I could never ever be hopeful or beautiful again. That my life would never really start. Which isn’t true, but to understand that, I had to read and read and read content in which really smart women insisted, ‘You’re fine the way you are. The majority of society may never see you that way, so you need to let that go. To let go of a lifetime’s worth of negative feedback. To love yourself. And when you really manage to do that, it’s gonna be enough. You’ll find that your own good opinion is good opinion enough.’ Loving ourselves means truly, deeply, letting go of what society thinks of us. So long as our worth is tied to their perceptions and opinions, we will ALWAYS be found wanting.”

             I love both Liz’s declaration, as well as Oprah’s – we must make a loving and grateful peace with our bodies. We must love and cherish the gift they are – regardless of any message otherwise from any source. Always return to gratitude that you have a body and that it allows you to jump and touch, smell and see, love and dance. Honor your body by caring for it and treating it with respect. Lindy West, author of the book Shrill said, “Loving yourself is not antithetical to health, it is intrinsic to health. You can’t take good care of a thing you hate.”

             Your challenge for this week is to start to notice the complaints and criticisms – the inner stories about...]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2765Wed, 28 Feb 2018 09:00:43 -070034:51falsefullLooking in the mirror has for many, become one of the most uncomfortable things we do. Uncomfortable because the minute we do the inner critic hammers away. It’s universal. You’re not alone. Criticizing the physical form we each inhabit is a rampant and pervasive story no matter where you live or who you are. Keep listening for a discussion on body talk, recrafting body stories, and why we’re all in this together.Lori LeeEpisode 75 The Search for Annie Schmidt: Part 3The Search for Annie Schmidt: Part 3

             “Bless the thing that broke you down and cracked you open because the world needs you open.”  –Rebecca Campbell

             On Wednesday, October 19^th, 2016 Annie Schmidt, daughter of Jon Schmidt, famous for his piano playing in the Piano Guys, and Michelle Schmidt, was reported missing. Over the next month, hundreds of people and search dogs embarked on what became an ordeal that gained national attention as the search for her unfolded. This three-part series includes interviews with Annie’s mother -Michelle, the woman who found Annie’s body – Lydia Mcgranahan, and another participant who was key in helping to find Annie – Marty Newey. This series starts out introducing Annie and Lydia – the woman who found her,  and we jump into the inspiration that brought a woman who had no idea who Annie was into the search in the Columbia River Gorge. The second installment takes us further into the search and the inspiration and weaving of events that took place as we talked about the experience with those who were there. And, this third and final episode takes us to when Annie’s body was found, to her funeral where Lydia hears Annie speak to her, and where finding Annie is also losing Annie.

             Tune in for in-depth interviews as we uncover the miraculous events surrounding the discovery of Annie Schmidt in this three-part series.

             Thanks to The Piano Guys for the use of their music in this episode.  https://thepianoguys.com/

              

             Other links regarding Annie Schmidt:

             http://fox13now.com/tag/annie-schmidt/

             https://www.deseretnews.com/article/865692954/One-year-after-the-loss-of-Annie-Schmidt-The-Piano-Guys-express-gratitude-for-prayers-with-release.html

             https://www.deseretnews.com/article/865693430/Piano-Guys-and-miracles-helped-Jon-and-Michelle-Schmidt-through-tragic-past-year.htm

             ]]>The Search for Annie Schmidt: Part 3

             “Bless the thing that broke you down and cracked you open because the world needs you open.”  –Rebecca Campbell

             On Wednesday, October 19^th, 2016 Annie Schmidt, daughter of Jon Schmidt, famous for his piano playing in the Piano Guys, and Michelle Schmidt, was reported missing. Over the next month, hundreds of people and search dogs embarked on what became an ordeal that gained national attention as the search for her unfolded. This three-part series includes interviews with Annie’s mother -Michelle, the woman who found Annie’s body – Lydia Mcgranahan, and another participant who was key in helping to find Annie – Marty Newey. This series starts out introducing Annie and Lydia – the woman who found her,  and we jump into the inspiration that brought a woman who had no idea who Annie was into the search in the Columbia River Gorge. The second installment takes us further into the search and the inspiration and weaving of events that took place as we talked about the experience with those who were there. And, this third and final episode takes us to when Annie’s body was found, to her funeral where Lydia hears Annie speak to her, and where finding Annie is also losing Annie.

             Tune in for in-depth interviews as we uncover the miraculous events surrounding the discovery of Annie Schmidt in this three-part series.

             Thanks to The Piano Guys for the use of their music in this episode.  https://thepianoguys.com/

              

             Other links regarding Annie Schmidt:

             http://fox13now.com/tag/annie-schmidt/

             https://www.deseretnews.com/article/865692954/One-year-after-the-loss-of-Annie-Schmidt-The-Piano-Guys-express-gratitude-for-prayers-with-release.html

             https://www.deseretnews.com/article/865693430/Piano-Guys-and-miracles-helped-Jon-and-Michelle-Schmidt-through-tragic-past-year.htm

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2755Wed, 21 Feb 2018 09:00:04 -070028:34falsefullOn Wednesday, October 19th, 2016 Annie Schmidt, daughter of Jon Schmidt, famous for his piano playing in the Piano Guys, and Michelle Schmidt, was reported missing. Over the next month, hundreds of people and search dogs embarked on what became an ordeal that gained national attention as the search for her unfolded. This third episode in the three-part series includes interviews with Annie’s mother -Michelle, the woman who found Annie’s body – Lydia Mcgranahan, and another participant who was key in helping to find Annie – Marty Newey. This third and final episode takes us to when Annie's body was found, to her funeral where Lydia hears Annie speak to her, and where finding Annie is also losing Annie.Lori LeeEpisode 74 The Search for Annie Schmidt: Part 2PART II The Search for Annie Schmidt

             On Wednesday, October 19^th, 2016 Annie Schmidt, daughter of Jon Schmidt, famous for his piano playing in the Piano Guys, and Michelle Schmidt, was reported missing. Over the next month, hundreds of people and search dogs embarked on what became an ordeal that gained national attention as the search for her unfolded. This three-part series includes interviews with Annie’s mother -Michelle, the woman who found Annie’s body – Lydia Mcgranahan, and another participant who was key in helping to find Annie – Marty Newey. This series starts out introducing Annie and Lydia – the woman who found her, and we jump into the inspiration that brought a woman who had no idea who Annie was into the search in the Columbia River Gorge. This second installment takes us further into the search and the inspiration and weaving of events that took place as we talk about the experience with those who were there.

             Tune in for in-depth interviews as we uncover the miraculous events surrounding the discovery of Annie Schmidt in this three-part series.

             Thanks to The Piano Guys for the use of their music in this episode.  https://thepianoguys.com/

              

             Other links regarding Annie Schmidt:

             http://fox13now.com/tag/annie-schmidt/

             https://www.deseretnews.com/article/865692954/One-year-after-the-loss-of-Annie-Schmidt-The-Piano-Guys-express-gratitude-for-prayers-with-release.html

             https://www.deseretnews.com/article/865693430/Piano-Guys-and-miracles-helped-Jon-and-Michelle-Schmidt-through-tragic-past-year.htm

             
             

             ]]>PART II The Search for Annie Schmidt

             On Wednesday, October 19^th, 2016 Annie Schmidt, daughter of Jon Schmidt, famous for his piano playing in the Piano Guys, and Michelle Schmidt, was reported missing. Over the next month, hundreds of people and search dogs embarked on what became an ordeal that gained national attention as the search for her unfolded. This three-part series includes interviews with Annie’s mother -Michelle, the woman who found Annie’s body – Lydia Mcgranahan, and another participant who was key in helping to find Annie – Marty Newey. This series starts out introducing Annie and Lydia – the woman who found her, and we jump into the inspiration that brought a woman who had no idea who Annie was into the search in the Columbia River Gorge. This second installment takes us further into the search and the inspiration and weaving of events that took place as we talk about the experience with those who were there.

             Tune in for in-depth interviews as we uncover the miraculous events surrounding the discovery of Annie Schmidt in this three-part series.

             Thanks to The Piano Guys for the use of their music in this episode.  https://thepianoguys.com/

              

             Other links regarding Annie Schmidt:

             http://fox13now.com/tag/annie-schmidt/

             https://www.deseretnews.com/article/865692954/One-year-after-the-loss-of-Annie-Schmidt-The-Piano-Guys-express-gratitude-for-prayers-with-release.html

             https://www.deseretnews.com/article/865693430/Piano-Guys-and-miracles-helped-Jon-and-Michelle-Schmidt-through-tragic-past-year.htm

             
             

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2662Wed, 14 Feb 2018 09:00:00 -070029:47falsefullOn Wednesday, October 19th, 2016 Annie Schmidt, daughter of Jon Schmidt, famous for his piano playing in the Piano Guys, and Michelle Schmidt, was reported missing. Over the next month, hundreds of people and search dogs embarked on what became an ordeal that gained national attention as the search for her unfolded. This three-part series includes interviews with Annie’s mother -Michelle, the woman who found Annie’s body – Lydia Mcgranahan, and another participant who was key in helping to find Annie – Marty Newey. This series starts out introducing Annie and Lydia – the woman who found her, and we jump into the inspiration that brought a woman who had no idea who Annie was into the search in the Columbia River Gorge. This second installment takes us further into the search and the inspiration and weaving of events that took place as we talk about the experience with those who were there, including a moment where Annie's mother hears her daughter speak to her from beyond the grave. Tune in for the rest of the story.Lori LeeEpisode 73 The Search for Annie Schmidt: Part 1THE SEARCH FOR ANNIE SCHMIDT – PART 1

             On Wednesday, October 19^th, 2016 Annie Schmidt, daughter of Jon Schmidt, famous for his piano playing in the Piano Guys, and Michelle Schmidt, was reported missing. Over the next month, hundreds of people and search dogs embarked on what became an ordeal that gained national attention as the search for her unfolded. This three-part series includes interviews with Annie’s mother -Michelle, the woman who found Annie’s body – Lydia Mcgranahan, and another participant who was key in helping to find Annie – Marty Newey. This series starts out introducing Annie and Lydia – the woman who found her, and we jump into the inspiration that brought a woman who had no idea who Annie was into the search in the Columbia River Gorge.

             Tune in for in-depth interviews as we uncover the miraculous events surrounding the discovery of Annie Schmidt in this three-part series.

             Other links regarding Annie Schmidt:

             http://fox13now.com/tag/annie-schmidt/

             https://www.deseretnews.com/article/865692954/One-year-after-the-loss-of-Annie-Schmidt-The-Piano-Guys-express-gratitude-for-prayers-with-release.html

             https://www.deseretnews.com/article/865693430/Piano-Guys-and-miracles-helped-Jon-and-Michelle-Schmidt-through-tragic-past-year.html

             
             

             ]]>THE SEARCH FOR ANNIE SCHMIDT – PART 1

             On Wednesday, October 19^th, 2016 Annie Schmidt, daughter of Jon Schmidt, famous for his piano playing in the Piano Guys, and Michelle Schmidt, was reported missing. Over the next month, hundreds of people and search dogs embarked on what became an ordeal that gained national attention as the search for her unfolded. This three-part series includes interviews with Annie’s mother -Michelle, the woman who found Annie’s body – Lydia Mcgranahan, and another participant who was key in helping to find Annie – Marty Newey. This series starts out introducing Annie and Lydia – the woman who found her, and we jump into the inspiration that brought a woman who had no idea who Annie was into the search in the Columbia River Gorge.

             Tune in for in-depth interviews as we uncover the miraculous events surrounding the discovery of Annie Schmidt in this three-part series.

             Other links regarding Annie Schmidt:

             http://fox13now.com/tag/annie-schmidt/

             https://www.deseretnews.com/article/865692954/One-year-after-the-loss-of-Annie-Schmidt-The-Piano-Guys-express-gratitude-for-prayers-with-release.html

             https://www.deseretnews.com/article/865693430/Piano-Guys-and-miracles-helped-Jon-and-Michelle-Schmidt-through-tragic-past-year.html

             
             

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2636Wed, 07 Feb 2018 09:00:00 -070028:24falsefullOn Wednesday, October 19th, 2016 Annie Schmidt, daughter of Jon Schmidt, famous for his piano playing in the Piano Guys, and Michelle Schmidt, was reported missing. Over the next month, hundreds of people and search dogs embarked on what became an ordeal that gained national attention as the search for her unfolded. This three-part series includes interviews with Annie’s mother -Michelle, the woman who found Annie's body – Lydia Mcgranahan, and another participant who was key in helping to find Annie – Marty Newey. This series starts out introducing Annie and Lydia – the woman who found her, and we jump into the inspiration that brought a woman who had no idea who Annie was into the search in the Columbia River Gorge.Lori LeeEpisode 72 What Is A Threshold Guardian? What Blocks Your Forward Progress?Understanding Story Archetypes Can Provide A Whole New Interpretation of Your Story

             Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast. Today we are getting real with the parts of story. This is going to be fun.  Have you ever been blocked in life? You’re cruising along in life, headed toward your goal or something you want, and bam, something challenges you. Of course you have! It’s a part of everyday life. So, let’s talk about a perspective shift here on this topic.

             First a definition. What is an archetype? An archetype is a recurrent symbol or motif.  In story there are 7 character archetypes. Carl Jung called the archetypes of story the ancient patterns of personality that are the shared heritage of the human race. His claim is that within the human mind all 7 of these archetypes are a part of each of us. Sometimes we’re the hero, sometimes the mentor, sometimes the Herald , the shape-shifter, threshold guardian, or the trickster. Sometimes we must even deal with the shadow – the repressed part of the hero that must be loosed or destroyed or redeemed and turned into a positive force. But, I’m getting ahead of myself… Tune in for our discussion about the troll on the bridge.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you.  Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

             As mentioned there are a handful of archetypes, but today we’re going to delve specifically into the Threshold Guardian – the symbolic troll, or knight, or witch, or voice that challenges your forward journey.

             Last year I was having an on-line conversation about how we are the heroes of our own stories and my high school boyfriend popped into the conversation and made a comment about how sometimes we are also the dragon or the antagonist in another person’s story (I’m not sure if there was an ulterior message in that comment). This got me thinking about the roles we play. Sometimes we are the extra, sitting at the table in the roadside café of someone else’s story. Sometimes we are the herald – the one who brings the message or call to adventure to another person – like Gandalf bringing the invitation to adventure for Bilbo. Sometimes we are the mentor, providing inspiration to someone on their journey, providing them with gifts – like Yoda in Star Wars. Always in our own story we are the hero, even if it’s an anti-hero, but understanding the roles we may be playing in other’s stories, and recognizing the roles that other’s play in our stories gives us a perspective shift that often is the key to breaking through something, or finding a solution, or having a little more fun in the creation of our life story.

             By understanding the parts of story, we can begin to see our lives through different eyes. We can begin to see our stories as real stories and that makes it sorta fun.

             A couple months ago I was speaking to an associate who was not on her game. She said, “I’m just thinking that maybe being a Realtor isn’t for me. It’s hard finding clients,” she said. “The other day I was knocking doors for my open house and the first door I went to the man who answered acted so put out that I was there that I almost froze up. I put the fliers in my car and just quit inviting people. Maybe this isn’t for me.”

             So, I launched into this concept about archetypes. “In story,” I explained, “there are archetypal characters. One of them is the Threshold Guardian. This is the character that is placed to keep the unworthy from entering. Often times this character is a lieutenant of the villain, a naysayer or an internal demon, sometimes it’s just someone putting up...]]>Understanding Story Archetypes Can Provide A Whole New Interpretation of Your Story

             Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast. Today we are getting real with the parts of story. This is going to be fun.  Have you ever been blocked in life? You’re cruising along in life, headed toward your goal or something you want, and bam, something challenges you. Of course you have! It’s a part of everyday life. So, let’s talk about a perspective shift here on this topic.

             First a definition. What is an archetype? An archetype is a recurrent symbol or motif.  In story there are 7 character archetypes. Carl Jung called the archetypes of story the ancient patterns of personality that are the shared heritage of the human race. His claim is that within the human mind all 7 of these archetypes are a part of each of us. Sometimes we’re the hero, sometimes the mentor, sometimes the Herald , the shape-shifter, threshold guardian, or the trickster. Sometimes we must even deal with the shadow – the repressed part of the hero that must be loosed or destroyed or redeemed and turned into a positive force. But, I’m getting ahead of myself… Tune in for our discussion about the troll on the bridge.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you.  Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

             As mentioned there are a handful of archetypes, but today we’re going to delve specifically into the Threshold Guardian – the symbolic troll, or knight, or witch, or voice that challenges your forward journey.

             Last year I was having an on-line conversation about how we are the heroes of our own stories and my high school boyfriend popped into the conversation and made a comment about how sometimes we are also the dragon or the antagonist in another person’s story (I’m not sure if there was an ulterior message in that comment). This got me thinking about the roles we play. Sometimes we are the extra, sitting at the table in the roadside café of someone else’s story. Sometimes we are the herald – the one who brings the message or call to adventure to another person – like Gandalf bringing the invitation to adventure for Bilbo. Sometimes we are the mentor, providing inspiration to someone on their journey, providing them with gifts – like Yoda in Star Wars. Always in our own story we are the hero, even if it’s an anti-hero, but understanding the roles we may be playing in other’s stories, and recognizing the roles that other’s play in our stories gives us a perspective shift that often is the key to breaking through something, or finding a solution, or having a little more fun in the creation of our life story.

             By understanding the parts of story, we can begin to see our lives through different eyes. We can begin to see our stories as real stories and that makes it sorta fun.

             A couple months ago I was speaking to an associate who was not on her game. She said, “I’m just thinking that maybe being a Realtor isn’t for me. It’s hard finding clients,” she said. “The other day I was knocking doors for my open house and the first door I went to the man who answered acted so put out that I was there that I almost froze up. I put the fliers in my car and just quit inviting people. Maybe this isn’t for me.”

             So, I launched into this concept about archetypes. “In story,” I explained, “there are archetypal characters. One of them is the Threshold Guardian. This is the character that is placed to keep the unworthy from entering. Often times this character is a lieutenant of the villain, a naysayer or an internal demon, sometimes it’s just someone putting up resistance, but their function is to test the hero/heroine (you) to see if they are determined enough to gain the prize. These Threshold Guardians pop-up whenever you are headed toward something you want.” I told her. “This is one of your Threshold Guardians. How badly do you want to be a Realtor? Will you push past the resistance?”

             Thomas Edison said, “I never did anything worth doing by accident. Nor did any of my inventions come by accident: they came by work.”

             One of the truths about our stories is that as we are writing them, in order to be the hero, we must expect challenge, resistance, and opportunity for growth and learning. That’s what the hero’s journey is all about. That’s how he/she becomes the hero.  The Threshold Guardians will guard the path forward, and the stories you create in your mind about who you are, what you want, what you are capable of, and if you can get there will determine whether you make it past the guardians. Once my friend could see the fear and discomfort she felt as a Threshold Guardian, it ceased to be that she was afraid and inadequate for the job, and instead, the resistance became the hobgoblin who was guarding the treasure.  That was something she could work with. How do I get around this hobgoblin?

             So, what resistance are you up against right now in your journey? What Threshold Guardian is challenging your determination and your forward movement, and do you really want what is on the other side of that resistance, enough to figure out your way around it? Oh, this can become a game – it can become fun instead of getting stuck in frustration, which is the main emotion when something stops us in our path.

             What do you want really bad right now? What stands in your way – mentally, physically, emotionally, logically, monetarily? There could be all kinds of blocks, all kinds of guardians. They can even be created by you.  If you were the hero/heroine of a really great movie what creative and crazy interesting things could you implement to make your way past the threshold guardians in your story?

             In the story of the three billy goats gruff the mean ugly troll was the guardian of the bridge. The three billy goats were trying to cross the bridge to get to the hill of green grass to fatten themselves and enjoy the summer sun. In order to do this they had to cross the bridge, but the troll – the threshold guardian—would stop each one as they tried to pass and threaten to eat them. Well, short story shorter, the three billy goats worked together in creative out-of-the-box solution finding and as the first two small billy goats went to cross the bridge, the troll assaulted them, and the conversation went something like this, Troll: “How dare you cross my bridge, I’m coming to gobble you up.” Billy goat: “I’m too small and scrawny, but my big brother is coming along and he’s much fatter and much tastier and you’ll want to save yourself for him.” The troll, enjoying the idea of a large and delightful meal of fresh raw billy goat let the two smaller billy goat brothers pass by in succession. When the big brother billy goat came along he didn’t go down without a fight. He used his horns and poked out the troll’s eyes and crushed his bones to small bits and butted him off the bridge for a gory end to that threshold guardian. You thought this was just a fairy tale, but as with all fairy tales there are actually morals and deeper meanings that teach us how to approach life. In this case, the moral of the story is that threshold guardians are mean, scary, will eat you for dinner, and if you are crafty enough you can turn the tables. How bad do you want to cross the bridge? Well, get creative then.

             The word Hero comes from Greek root that means to protect and serve. A hero is born from self-sacrifice – a sacrifice of their comfort, their lives, time, and health for the greater good. A hero starts out as all ego with a shadow side, but as he heads out along the heroes journey he transcends and works one day at a time, one challenge at a time, one dragon at a time to become the hero we know he/she is. The shadow archetype is a part of every hero character and in each of us. The shadow, as I mentioned earlier, is the repressed parts of the hero that must be loosed and turned positive. Wow – we are so multi-dimensional! But it is these threshold guardians, among other archetypes, who help the hero along the journey where he conquers the shadow side and becomes deserving of the big prize, the happily-ever-after, the golden crown.

             Barbara Bush and Mary Kay Ash are both credited with saying, “When you come to a roadblock, take a detour.”

             It’s all a part of the big story, the challenge, the creative solutions, the persistence roadblocks/threshold guardians create. So, this week’s take away – if you can see your road blocks as the archetypal threshold guardian, there to keep the unworthy from entering, there to challenge how badly you want the green grass and the warm sun at the top of the hill, the challenge becomes more of a game and less of discouragement.

             Consider your current threshold guardians and the creative solutions to get around them.

             Have fun creating your story out there and don’t forget about the 21-Day Challenge now available for you to sign up for on the website: www.loveyourstorypodcast.com. This challenge was created to help you test out a new story tool, every day for 21-Days and I guarantee you’ll walk away with a handful that you want to work into your everyday life to create more connection, possibility and satisfaction with your life. USE IT! And, of course, pass this podcast along to someone who might find value – share the love!

              

              

              

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2594Wed, 31 Jan 2018 09:00:37 -070014:02falsefullHave you ever been blocked in life? You’re cruising along, headed toward your goal or something you want, and BAM, something challenges you? Of course, you have! It’s a part of everyday life. So, let’s talk about a perspective shift here on this topic - what if that block is just a threshold guardian? Tune in to find out what I'm talking about.Lori LeeEpisode 71 A Story about Zimbabwe, Three Professional Golfers, and a Whole Lotta LoveA Story about Zimbabwe, Three Professional Golfers, and a Whole Lotta Love

             Once Upon A Time there were three professional golfers who walked into a bar….

             No, No, wrong story…

             But there were 3 professional golfers.  Their names were Reeve, CeCe and Lolly. All three were blond white women, but one was a native Zimbabwean, one was a native South African, and one was a native Norwegian.

             This story starts with Reeve, a coach on the professional women’s European golf tour, who in 1996 was walking through the children’s ward in a hospital in Zimbabwe. As she walked through the ward she met a  12-year-old girl who had been blinded when she was 8, by bi-lateral cataracts. Long story short, after a 15 minute surgery, this young girl who hadn’t been able to see her families faces, or where she was walking, or a sunrise or sunset for 4 years, later had the bandaged removed and her eyesight restored. Reeve cried at the miracle of it. Of how little it took to give so much back to another person. Cataract surgery costs $20 US, for supplies.

             Fast forward a few days and Reeve was walking with Laurette Maritz, better known as Lolly, South Africa’s top lady golf professional,  a beloved and household name in South Africa,  down the 18^th hole at Chapman Golf Course and the two were madly brainstorming about how they could raise money through charity golf events to purchase the medical equipment and supplies to provide this surgery for the many others in Zimbabwe who suffered from cataracts. This was 21 years ago.

             What started out as Eyes4Zimbabwe has morphed over the years into a much broader charity project that supplies everything from thousands of bales of clothing a year, to food, surgeries, dental work, hygiene supplies and literacy projects to people who might have never had clothing before, odd as that sounds. People who have never seen a pen or pencil – who have used their fingers to draw in the dirt. People who live in a place where the unemployment rate is 96% and scrounging in the dump to find things to sell is a viable and popular way of survival.

             In 2001 Cecilie Lundgreen, a Norwegian professional golfer, joined Reeve and Lolly and opened the Norwegian chapter. Six feet tall with bright blond hair and blue eyes, she is every bit the Norwegian, but all three women have a similar look. All three women are members of the LDS church. All three women use their broad reach in their professional lives to create abundance and reprieve for those who have less and suffer more in our world. All three women have hearts focused on doing good.

             So, now to the good stuff – today I am down in the Humanitarian Center of the LDS Church where these woman have collected massive amounts of supplies and the LDS church is allowing them to use their docks and bailing equipment for sorting and bailing and loading for shipment to Zimbabwe.

             This is how they work: first, they send out emails to everyone they know with their wish list of things they need – food, blankets, newborn kits, hygiene kits, school books, bibles, clothing, toys, etc. Many willing people start collecting and contacting friends and it is through the power of people and networking that massive amounts of donations are collected.  People show up with trailers full of clothes and trucks full of equipment. Stores provide donations and the medical community pitches in. Then the sorting starts – this is what I am doing today down at the Humanitarian Center. We are sorting clothing so we can put “girls pants” and “men’s coats” in specific bales for shipment. The clothes are varied, I’m struck by how unpicky and happy the African people are to get anything to wear. The clothes are not pressed or folded but smooshed together in bales to be able to ship as much as possible. Stories are told of people lined up for hours to get an outfit.

             But let me let you hear it from the mouths of]]>A Story about Zimbabwe, Three Professional Golfers, and a Whole Lotta Love

             Once Upon A Time there were three professional golfers who walked into a bar….

             No, No, wrong story…

             But there were 3 professional golfers.  Their names were Reeve, CeCe and Lolly. All three were blond white women, but one was a native Zimbabwean, one was a native South African, and one was a native Norwegian.

             This story starts with Reeve, a coach on the professional women’s European golf tour, who in 1996 was walking through the children’s ward in a hospital in Zimbabwe. As she walked through the ward she met a  12-year-old girl who had been blinded when she was 8, by bi-lateral cataracts. Long story short, after a 15 minute surgery, this young girl who hadn’t been able to see her families faces, or where she was walking, or a sunrise or sunset for 4 years, later had the bandaged removed and her eyesight restored. Reeve cried at the miracle of it. Of how little it took to give so much back to another person. Cataract surgery costs $20 US, for supplies.

             Fast forward a few days and Reeve was walking with Laurette Maritz, better known as Lolly, South Africa’s top lady golf professional,  a beloved and household name in South Africa,  down the 18^th hole at Chapman Golf Course and the two were madly brainstorming about how they could raise money through charity golf events to purchase the medical equipment and supplies to provide this surgery for the many others in Zimbabwe who suffered from cataracts. This was 21 years ago.

             What started out as Eyes4Zimbabwe has morphed over the years into a much broader charity project that supplies everything from thousands of bales of clothing a year, to food, surgeries, dental work, hygiene supplies and literacy projects to people who might have never had clothing before, odd as that sounds. People who have never seen a pen or pencil – who have used their fingers to draw in the dirt. People who live in a place where the unemployment rate is 96% and scrounging in the dump to find things to sell is a viable and popular way of survival.

             In 2001 Cecilie Lundgreen, a Norwegian professional golfer, joined Reeve and Lolly and opened the Norwegian chapter. Six feet tall with bright blond hair and blue eyes, she is every bit the Norwegian, but all three women have a similar look. All three women are members of the LDS church. All three women use their broad reach in their professional lives to create abundance and reprieve for those who have less and suffer more in our world. All three women have hearts focused on doing good.

             So, now to the good stuff – today I am down in the Humanitarian Center of the LDS Church where these woman have collected massive amounts of supplies and the LDS church is allowing them to use their docks and bailing equipment for sorting and bailing and loading for shipment to Zimbabwe.

             This is how they work: first, they send out emails to everyone they know with their wish list of things they need – food, blankets, newborn kits, hygiene kits, school books, bibles, clothing, toys, etc. Many willing people start collecting and contacting friends and it is through the power of people and networking that massive amounts of donations are collected.  People show up with trailers full of clothes and trucks full of equipment. Stores provide donations and the medical community pitches in. Then the sorting starts – this is what I am doing today down at the Humanitarian Center. We are sorting clothing so we can put “girls pants” and “men’s coats” in specific bales for shipment. The clothes are varied, I’m struck by how unpicky and happy the African people are to get anything to wear. The clothes are not pressed or folded but smooshed together in bales to be able to ship as much as possible. Stories are told of people lined up for hours to get an outfit.

             But let me let you hear it from the mouths of Reeve and CeCe.

              

             Tune in to the audio version for the interviews.

              

             It’s been a pleasure to learn about this project. An inspiration to watch people, of their own accord, work so hard to create stories that comfort and bless others. Volunteers thronged the Humanitarian center today – moms with their kids coming to sort and serve. Families and older couples. My son has been sorting and hauling bales for hours, and we are privileged to be a small part of a big story making a big difference.

             On the podcast I like to share stories of inspiration. Stories of overcoming and stories that illustrate ways of living big, bold and happy. This is one of these – from the many people who collect and donate, to the people here in the warehouse taking an hour or two out of their day to be one little cog in this machine, to these professional golfers who have created something big and beautiful. There is good in the world and we can all build that into our own stories.

             Check out the show notes for more contact information on Eyes4Zimbabwe, and thanks for tuning in today. Quick reminder – the 21-Day Challenge is live and ready for you to sign up to get a fun new challenge each day – a way to test out little ways of changing up your story to create more love, peace and possibility in your life. It’s a resource I hope you’ll use! Easy and fun. www.loveyourstorypodcast.com

              

             See you next week.

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2541Wed, 24 Jan 2018 09:00:19 -070022:44falsefullThis story starts with Reeve, a coach on the professional women’s European golf tour, who in 1996 was walking through the children’s ward in a hospital in Zimbabwe. As she walked through the ward she met a  12-year-old girl who had been blinded when she was 8, by bi-lateral cataracts. Long story short, after a 15 minute surgery, this young girl who hadn’t been able to see her families faces, or where she was walking, or a sunrise or sunset for 4 years, later had the bandaged removed and her eyesight restored. Reeve cried at the miracle of it. Of how little it took to give so much back to another person. Cataract surgery costs $20 US, for supplies. Tune in for the story of how this one event created a big and beautiful project that has blessed the lives of thousands of people across the world.Lori LeeEpisode 70 Sharing Stories to Create UnderstandingSharing Stories to Create Understanding

             Sometimes something as simple as a pair of cowboy boots and a story can change lives.

             The stories that make up our lives are the building blocks, that when put together, explain, in large part, who we are because they illustrate the paths we’ve walked and the decisions we’ve made or not made. When these stories are shared we open the doors to understanding one another, and that changes everything. Stay tuned for a discussion on understanding one another better through the sharing and listening to stories, and for a story about a girl in turquoise cowboy boots.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

             One of the many functions of story is that of sharing ourselves and our experiences with another. Once someone knows our stories they know many things about us. They know the triumphs and struggles we have faced. They know our responses to those events and people involved in those events. They know our attitudes and often we display our character by showing our choices during the unfolding of our stories and the lessons we learned within those experiences.

             Does this create vulnerability? Almost certainly, if told well. Does it create understanding? Without a doubt. Does that understanding change the way we interact with one another? Often, especially when understanding is expanded. Let me share an example.

             This example was shared by Amy S. Choi on September 30, 2015 in a Ted-Ed Blog called, How Telling Stories Can Transform a Classroom. The blog illustrates how the work StoryCorps is doing in collecting and sharing stories makes a difference, in this case, in a Jr. High classroom. More about StoryCorps in a minute, if you aren’t familiar with them.

             Story:

             Caitlyn, a quiet seventh grader, was bullied by the other kids in her class at Luther Burbank Middle School in Burbank, California. She wore the same cowboy boots every day and the other kids were awful about it.

             Ms. Mieliwocki, the English teacher introduced StoryCorps to her students. She gave them tape recorders and asked them to interview someone important in their lives. Over the next few months, the class listened to each student’s interview and discussed them together.

             Caitlyn, the gal who always wore the cowboy boots, had interviewed her mother. The two of them talked about their lives since Caitlyn’s father died of melanoma two years prior when Caitlyn was in the fifth grade. Before her dad passed away, he had wanted to get her something that would last forever — together, they picked out a pair of brown and turquoise cowboy boots. A year later, Caitlyn was diagnosed with melanoma herself. She had to have part of her foot removed. The boots her father bought were the only shoes that provided enough support for her to walk.

             None of the kids in her class, or even her teacher had known any of this, They felt small and ashamed for having been so cruel, and with this greater understanding, the teasing stopped. Not just for Caitlyn, but for everyone.

             Ms. Mieliwocki said,  “Telling our stories brought all of our lived realities into the classroom.”

             And that changed everything. It changed what the children knew about one another thus how they related to one another, and thus how they acted and treated one another. That’s a pretty big deal.

             So, StoryCorps is an American non-profit organization whose mission is to record, preserve, and share the stories of Americans from all...]]>Sharing Stories to Create Understanding

             Sometimes something as simple as a pair of cowboy boots and a story can change lives.

             The stories that make up our lives are the building blocks, that when put together, explain, in large part, who we are because they illustrate the paths we’ve walked and the decisions we’ve made or not made. When these stories are shared we open the doors to understanding one another, and that changes everything. Stay tuned for a discussion on understanding one another better through the sharing and listening to stories, and for a story about a girl in turquoise cowboy boots.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

             One of the many functions of story is that of sharing ourselves and our experiences with another. Once someone knows our stories they know many things about us. They know the triumphs and struggles we have faced. They know our responses to those events and people involved in those events. They know our attitudes and often we display our character by showing our choices during the unfolding of our stories and the lessons we learned within those experiences.

             Does this create vulnerability? Almost certainly, if told well. Does it create understanding? Without a doubt. Does that understanding change the way we interact with one another? Often, especially when understanding is expanded. Let me share an example.

             This example was shared by Amy S. Choi on September 30, 2015 in a Ted-Ed Blog called, How Telling Stories Can Transform a Classroom. The blog illustrates how the work StoryCorps is doing in collecting and sharing stories makes a difference, in this case, in a Jr. High classroom. More about StoryCorps in a minute, if you aren’t familiar with them.

             Story:

             Caitlyn, a quiet seventh grader, was bullied by the other kids in her class at Luther Burbank Middle School in Burbank, California. She wore the same cowboy boots every day and the other kids were awful about it.

             Ms. Mieliwocki, the English teacher introduced StoryCorps to her students. She gave them tape recorders and asked them to interview someone important in their lives. Over the next few months, the class listened to each student’s interview and discussed them together.

             Caitlyn, the gal who always wore the cowboy boots, had interviewed her mother. The two of them talked about their lives since Caitlyn’s father died of melanoma two years prior when Caitlyn was in the fifth grade. Before her dad passed away, he had wanted to get her something that would last forever — together, they picked out a pair of brown and turquoise cowboy boots. A year later, Caitlyn was diagnosed with melanoma herself. She had to have part of her foot removed. The boots her father bought were the only shoes that provided enough support for her to walk.

             None of the kids in her class, or even her teacher had known any of this, They felt small and ashamed for having been so cruel, and with this greater understanding, the teasing stopped. Not just for Caitlyn, but for everyone.

             Ms. Mieliwocki said,  “Telling our stories brought all of our lived realities into the classroom.”

             And that changed everything. It changed what the children knew about one another thus how they related to one another, and thus how they acted and treated one another. That’s a pretty big deal.

             So, StoryCorps is an American non-profit organization whose mission is to record, preserve, and share the stories of Americans from all backgrounds and beliefs. It is located in Brooklyn in New York City and was started in 2003. Their purpose is to remind us of our shared humanity, to strengthen and build the connections between people, to teach the value of listening, and to weave into the fabric of our culture the understanding that everyone’s story matters. If you go to their website, StoryCorps.org and hit the story tab, you can listen to story after story, only about 4-5 minutes long, from people of all walks of life as they share a meaningful life experience. I just got done listening to an interview with the mother and father of one of the victims of the Sandy Hook Elementary school shooting in Connecticut in 2012 discussing their story and the death of their daughter. Listening to the real heartfelt stories of others brings to life experiences beyond our own. Listening to their story suddenly makes that event more real to me, my empathy is increased, a connection to something that WAS remote has been created simply because I listened to another’s story.

             As shown here, in the story of the cowboy boots, StoryCorps mission provided the key to a wonderful learning experience that changed all those in that classroom through the sharing of stories. I’ll include a link to their website in the show notes.

             We all have different life journeys. Often it’s hard to understand another’s journey, especially if ours is very different, but the only way we can get closer to understanding one another is to listen to one another’s stories. To share and to listen, and in that listening try to understand and sit with a space of allowing without judgment.

             Henry David Thoreau said, “Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other’s eyes for an instant?”

             While literally being able to look through one another’s eyes is not a possibility, the closest we come is to share our stories, our perspectives. This sharing creates a space for connection. Let me share a couple places this stands out to me…and these are just a few of many.

             First, when men are going through a struggle and they try to tough it out and keep it to themselves they often cause a space of disconnect because those around who would help, often their women, just feel confused and disconnected because they don’t know what the issue is. When and if the man decides to share what is going on with him there is often compassion, nurturing, and all the things that women do best. Women’s hearts are softened when they understand a back-story, feelings, or sense a need. But it requires the sharing of their story and what they the other person is struggling with.

             This can be turned around also, when women don’t share what is wrong because they assume the man should already know, when in fact, he does not. Am I just talking about communicating with one another, no, it goes beyond that, there is a difference in me telling you I am concerned or upset about something and communicating the idea, and me sharing the background story that illustrates why I am concerned about it. It’s the background story that allows for understanding of why a person takes the approach they take or feels as they do. These may be simple or complex.

             For example: Let’s say I feel strongly that it’s the man’s duty to lock the doors at night and make sure the house is safe. My husband (which I don’t have – this is a made-up example) may not have that as a habit or he is busy with his own stuff and thus it doesn’t get done or I have to do it. I can say, “Hey, I’d really like you to lock the house up at night,” and he might feel like something else is getting pawned off on him, but if I share the story about how my dad always closed the house up at night, going from door to door, window to window, and it created a space of feeling protected, there is increased understanding of why I have the perspective I have. When there is understanding good people naturally orchestrate their lives with one another more smoothly.

             I was talking with my friend about how this works in his marriage. He said “this happens all the time, but the way it plays out is that she thinks she shouldn’t have to explain why she is asking me to do something so it looks like “ask. feel irritated. get a further explanation and share the reasonings. smooth out and find a solution.” What if when you made an ask you took the time to explain the story around your ask and the conversation could open without the irritation phase and progress into solution finding?

             Another example, in my Story Launchpad workshop – a workshop I do for business professionals to help them find and strategize how to use their stories — one of the types of stories that we work on is the Origin Story. In one workshop I was working with a mortgage lender. As she did her work she discovered that her story originated with a poor lending experience that she and her husband had had when they bought their home 20 or so years ago. At the time she was NOT in the lending industry and as they went through the process of purchasing their home they were told they were approved, and then they were told they weren’t approved, back and forth and the stress was terrible because this was at a time when you could put sweat equity into your home before you closed on it, so they had made investments of time and money in the home. No one discussed with them the costs of closing the loan so they had to dig up the money the day of closing. She didn’t understand why it had to be so difficult and she hated that they always felt like they were on the verge of losing the deal. She went into lending so that she could help others have a better lending experience; so she could keep the discomfort she felt out of the equation for those she worked with.

             When she shares this story with her clients and potential clients they begin to understand who they are working with and why they can trust her. She’s not just a fly-by-night lender hoping to make a buck, she’s a dedicated professional with a purpose beyond herself, with experience in what NOT to do and a desire to give her clients a smooth and stress-free experience. Sharing this story allows her to become something more in the eyes of those she works with; it builds trust because they understand her better.

             The other day a listener contacted me and said, I love the spaces where you get vulnerable. I love knowing that you’ve been divorced three times and that is has caused you embarrassment – it makes you real to me.

             I recorded, as a guest, on the Shameless Mom Academy podcast yesterday, and as Sara Dean and I spoke she shared a bit of her story about her infertility and her work in reframing her story to include only having one child, but being able to help more moms enjoy and excel at motherhood through her podcast and her personal work that she said she would not have had time to do if she had had more than one child. Understanding her story helped me have a greater appreciation for what she is doing and why. And really, that makes all the difference.

             Are we listening to people’s authentic stories? Are we building bridges with our stories? Today’s episode is about finding our commonality through the sharing of our stories, because that commonality it is stronger than our separateness.

             Albert Einstein said, “Peace cannot be kept by force; it can only be achieved by understanding.”

             The global nature of our world, the way we can access, trade, see and interact with people from different cultures across the world means that it has never been more important to seek to understand through sharing and listening to one another’s stories – without judgment, and instead with a spirit of attempted understanding. We are exposed to more people with different ideas. It’s a wonderful treasure trove of possibility for expanding our understanding. Even within our own country, here in the US, the deep political divisions are strong and while sharing our stories of why we each feel as we do may not change another’s mind, it will increase understanding as to where others come from and why they have the perspectives they have.

             Seeking to share stories and increase understanding is a step toward love in all relationships: from the most personal spouse and family relationships and sharing stories that help them to understand us and our quirks; to our neighbors with different ideas; to others we’ve never met and don’t yet understand in different countries, religions, and cultures.

             Who in your life, where perhaps there is misunderstanding or discord, can you share a story with today that will help increase their understanding of who you are and where you are coming from? Where can you build a bridge by sharing a story, or maybe asking for another to share their story?

             I can picture Caitlyn and her turquoise and brown cowboy boots and all the other children in their classroom sitting each day and listening to the story interviews that captured the inside lives of their schoolmates that none had previously been privy to. I can imagine through that one exercise the number of changed relationships, the empathy, and the insights those Jr. High students gained by listening and sharing and suddenly understanding something they didn’t before. That people have stories and reasons for the way they do things. That everyone’s story matters and that by sharing we open the doors to understanding.

             Thanks for being here today. I hope the discussion sparked an idea for a space where you can share a story that will create connection for you. If you’ve got some comments or stories you’d like to share, head to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and hit up the comment box under this episode. Also, don’t forget to sign up for the free audio/ebook: The Key to Your Super Self – How your Stories Unlock your Super Power. My gift to you – just head to the website to grab it. A pop-up box will pop-up when you visit the site and you can sign up for it. And, of course, if you haven’t hopped on the the 21-Day Challenge bandwagon – head to the website and sign up for a fun, productive and guided way to create more love, peace, and possibility in your story. These challenges are things like do a RAK or get rid of something in your space that you no longer need, or give someone the benefit of the doubt today. They are simple but profound things that help you create your best life story.

             See you next week for another great conversation on creating our life stories.

              

             Ted Ed Blog:

             http://blog.ed.ted.com/2015/09/30/how-telling-stories-can-transform-a-classroom/

             Story Corps Website:

             www.storycorps.org

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2486Wed, 17 Jan 2018 09:00:44 -070020:06falsefullThe stories that make up our lives are the building blocks, that when put together, explain, in large part, who we are because they illustrate the paths we’ve walked and the decisions we’ve made or not made. When these stories are shared we open the doors to understanding one another, and that changes everything. Stay tuned for a discussion on understanding one another better through the sharing and listening to stories, and for a story about a girl in turquoise cowboy boots.Lori LeeEpisode 69 Interview with Ben Amos from Engage with Story – BUSINESS – Using Video StrategicallyBen Amos Interview: Using Video Strategically (Business Episode)

             Welcome back to the Love Your Story interview land. Today we embark on a business episode in our interview with Ben Amos from Austrailia. Ben is a passionate online video strategist and the host of Engage with Story podcast. He is the founder and creative director of Innovate Media; an online video strategy and production agency based in Queensland, Australia. His podcast is all about exploring the power of storytelling in moving people to action in your business strategy. He talks with expert story artists from around the world deep diving into storytelling for business. I’ve asked him on the podcast today to talk about the angle of strategy. Stay tuned for our discussion from the land down-under.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

             In our business episodes we often discuss the importance of using story to connect with clients or employees, stakeholders or potential investors, but today we’re getting into the angle of how to grow market reach by strategically using story. This is Ben’s area of expertise. So, welcome to the Love Your Story podcast Ben.

              

             Listen to the audio for the interview with Ben Amos

              

              

             With any business endeavor, embarking with a strategy in mind, rather than using the throw a handful-of mud at the wall and see what sticks approach is generally the best idea. This way the money you are spending, the audience you are reaching, the efforts being put into the business have a purpose and end plan. Using story IS the most powerful way to connect with people in order to create a space of interest and a form for remembering what you’ve communicated, but when we tell the stories with purpose we are taking steps directly toward our goal.

             Sun Tsu, Ancient Chinese Military Strategist said, “Strategy without tactics is the slowest route to victory, tactics without strategy is the noise before defeat.” 

             Your strategy is what Ben is talking about – the vision he helps his client get before stepping on to the trail, and the tactics are the use of stories in the appropriate places to achieve this strategy.

             Thanks for tuning in today. Have a great week creating your best stories and if you haven’t signed up for the 21-Day Challenge yet, go to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and hop on the train of testing out fun story tools in this guided 3 week challenge. There’s more information on it on the website, and reach out if you have questions about it. For those of you already in the challenge – keep up the great work and momentum! You’re rockin it! See you next week.

             For more information on Ben:

             ben@engagevideomarketing.com

             www.engagevideomarketing.com

             Insta and Twitter: @engage_ben

             Free video strategy course: www.engagevideomarketing.com/foundations

              

             ]]>Ben Amos Interview: Using Video Strategically (Business Episode)

             Welcome back to the Love Your Story interview land. Today we embark on a business episode in our interview with Ben Amos from Austrailia. Ben is a passionate online video strategist and the host of Engage with Story podcast. He is the founder and creative director of Innovate Media; an online video strategy and production agency based in Queensland, Australia. His podcast is all about exploring the power of storytelling in moving people to action in your business strategy. He talks with expert story artists from around the world deep diving into storytelling for business. I’ve asked him on the podcast today to talk about the angle of strategy. Stay tuned for our discussion from the land down-under.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

             In our business episodes we often discuss the importance of using story to connect with clients or employees, stakeholders or potential investors, but today we’re getting into the angle of how to grow market reach by strategically using story. This is Ben’s area of expertise. So, welcome to the Love Your Story podcast Ben.

              

             Listen to the audio for the interview with Ben Amos

              

              

             With any business endeavor, embarking with a strategy in mind, rather than using the throw a handful-of mud at the wall and see what sticks approach is generally the best idea. This way the money you are spending, the audience you are reaching, the efforts being put into the business have a purpose and end plan. Using story IS the most powerful way to connect with people in order to create a space of interest and a form for remembering what you’ve communicated, but when we tell the stories with purpose we are taking steps directly toward our goal.

             Sun Tsu, Ancient Chinese Military Strategist said, “Strategy without tactics is the slowest route to victory, tactics without strategy is the noise before defeat.” 

             Your strategy is what Ben is talking about – the vision he helps his client get before stepping on to the trail, and the tactics are the use of stories in the appropriate places to achieve this strategy.

             Thanks for tuning in today. Have a great week creating your best stories and if you haven’t signed up for the 21-Day Challenge yet, go to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and hop on the train of testing out fun story tools in this guided 3 week challenge. There’s more information on it on the website, and reach out if you have questions about it. For those of you already in the challenge – keep up the great work and momentum! You’re rockin it! See you next week.

             For more information on Ben:

             ben@engagevideomarketing.com

             www.engagevideomarketing.com

             Insta and Twitter: @engage_ben

             Free video strategy course: www.engagevideomarketing.com/foundations

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2481Wed, 10 Jan 2018 09:00:51 -070025:24falsefullAre you using video to market your business? Are you implimenting strategy around those videos? Today we embark on a business episode in our interview with Ben Amos from Austrailia. Ben is a passionate online video strategist and the host of Engage with Story podcast. He is the founder and creative director of Innovate Media; an online video strategy and production agency based in Queensland, Australia. His podcast is all about exploring the power of storytelling in moving people to action in your business strategy. He talks with expert story artists from around the world deep diving into storytelling for business. I’ve asked him on the podcast today to talk about the angle of strategy.Lori LeeEpisode 68: Kick Off 2018 with the 21-Day Challenge21-Day Challenge – Take it and get serious about creating your best story.

             Today is Launch Day! Let me explain…

             Love Your Story was created to help people realize that their life stories are within their control. It is a platform for conversations about ideas and tools that help us shape our life stories and create them on purpose with more joy, love, satisfaction, or whatever you want to write into the story you create with your every day living. Well, since we went live in October of 2016 we have talked every week about a variety of these tools, with the hope in mind that those who are listening are getting ideas, inspiration and empowerment to create healthy, happy, and strong stories, rather than small, scared and heavily burdened life stories that often just come with the territory of living.

             But…that’s a lot of tools. If you’re anything like me, it’s all fine and dandy to know what you should do, but when there is too much to do I just shut down. I go into overwhelm mode and I don’t do anything.

             Well, today we launch the 21-Day Challenge, just in time to start off  2018 with a bang!

             Do you want to live brave, bold and joyful as you create your daily story? Do you want to be able to re-see the parts of your story that currently hold you back or are laden with fear or shame in a different and hopeful way? Well, Love Your Story is about helping you do this,– here is where the 21-Day Challenge comes in.

             I am really excited about this because this is going to be fun for those who get involved, but also because this is going to be very powerful for the people who get involved!

             First of all – click the 21-day challenge button and decide that every day, for the next 21 days, you are going to take the challenge that comes to you – whatever it is, no excuses for missing or skipping, you will embark on three weeks of interesting possibility, fun, and a few life-changing ideas. But here’s the idea behind it – it’s a tasters table of story tools. Goodbye overwhelm. You get to try out 21 different tools that build possibility, connection, and satisfaction in your life story – decide which ones you like and want to keep using. It’s like that hor derve plate in the restaurant that gives you a little taste of everything.

             So, once you sign up, each day you’ll get a new challenge based around one of the story tools – exercises for forgiving or being present, or extending a kindness, or working on your own inner voice, etc. Some really fun and guided challenges you get to play with and just work into your everyday experience.

             Once you start the challenge you’ll get an email with a link to your challenge page. Each day for 21 days a new challenge will be available on your page. Get on every morning, see what your challenge is, work it into your everyday life, and then log in for a quick report at the end of the day. There is a Write It Out link that concludes the challenge where you get to write in what you did for the challenge and the experience it created for you. This gives you some time to process and think about the experience and it gives me a peek into what great things are being created in the world. Repeat for 21 fun and exciting days. You’ll never know what the next day’s challenge will be until you unlock that challenge in the morning.

             Now – I want to point out that this is not to increase your already full list of things to do – or to add to your overwhelm—each challenge are things that we can build into everyday living. Taking little bites shows you how to do it. All the tools that help you live your best story fit into your everyday living anyway – you want a more fulfilling life story, these are tools that help you do it.

             I wanted to share a couple testimonials from some gals who have accepted Love Your Story challenges in the past.

             Katie Houston, out of SLC in...]]>21-Day Challenge – Take it and get serious about creating your best story.

             Today is Launch Day! Let me explain…

             Love Your Story was created to help people realize that their life stories are within their control. It is a platform for conversations about ideas and tools that help us shape our life stories and create them on purpose with more joy, love, satisfaction, or whatever you want to write into the story you create with your every day living. Well, since we went live in October of 2016 we have talked every week about a variety of these tools, with the hope in mind that those who are listening are getting ideas, inspiration and empowerment to create healthy, happy, and strong stories, rather than small, scared and heavily burdened life stories that often just come with the territory of living.

             But…that’s a lot of tools. If you’re anything like me, it’s all fine and dandy to know what you should do, but when there is too much to do I just shut down. I go into overwhelm mode and I don’t do anything.

             Well, today we launch the 21-Day Challenge, just in time to start off  2018 with a bang!

             Do you want to live brave, bold and joyful as you create your daily story? Do you want to be able to re-see the parts of your story that currently hold you back or are laden with fear or shame in a different and hopeful way? Well, Love Your Story is about helping you do this,– here is where the 21-Day Challenge comes in.

             I am really excited about this because this is going to be fun for those who get involved, but also because this is going to be very powerful for the people who get involved!

             First of all – click the 21-day challenge button and decide that every day, for the next 21 days, you are going to take the challenge that comes to you – whatever it is, no excuses for missing or skipping, you will embark on three weeks of interesting possibility, fun, and a few life-changing ideas. But here’s the idea behind it – it’s a tasters table of story tools. Goodbye overwhelm. You get to try out 21 different tools that build possibility, connection, and satisfaction in your life story – decide which ones you like and want to keep using. It’s like that hor derve plate in the restaurant that gives you a little taste of everything.

             So, once you sign up, each day you’ll get a new challenge based around one of the story tools – exercises for forgiving or being present, or extending a kindness, or working on your own inner voice, etc. Some really fun and guided challenges you get to play with and just work into your everyday experience.

             Once you start the challenge you’ll get an email with a link to your challenge page. Each day for 21 days a new challenge will be available on your page. Get on every morning, see what your challenge is, work it into your everyday life, and then log in for a quick report at the end of the day. There is a Write It Out link that concludes the challenge where you get to write in what you did for the challenge and the experience it created for you. This gives you some time to process and think about the experience and it gives me a peek into what great things are being created in the world. Repeat for 21 fun and exciting days. You’ll never know what the next day’s challenge will be until you unlock that challenge in the morning.

             Now – I want to point out that this is not to increase your already full list of things to do – or to add to your overwhelm—each challenge are things that we can build into everyday living. Taking little bites shows you how to do it. All the tools that help you live your best story fit into your everyday living anyway – you want a more fulfilling life story, these are tools that help you do it.

             I wanted to share a couple testimonials from some gals who have accepted Love Your Story challenges in the past.

             Katie Houston, out of SLC in Utah

             Speaking about one specific challenge – I was so surprised by how it changed the way I thought- because I was thinking about gratitude so much, I felt more gratitude. It was absolutely worth my time! It was really cool to connect with my Grandma and think about my gratitude for her, even though our relationship is complicated. I had some pretty amazing experiences. On top of that I learned about an important life tool. I learned that sometimes we may feel something, but we need to be more vigilant about expressing it. It makes such a big difference. As a teacher, for example, I need to remember what a difference it makes when I compliment my students and tell them how proud I am of them.

             I would totally do this again.

              

             Sandi Bartlett Atwood, Canada

             About 2 months ago, I woke up feeling a little defeated and lost. I had signed up for the Love Your Story Podcast earlier in the year. I listened to the first one and had enjoyed it but, to be honest, I’d been too busy, I was already successful and happy, and I was not the kind of person who needs a bunch of self-help mumbo jumbo (all wrong-minded stories I’d been telling myself by the way) but on that bleak August morning, I was lacking and looking for some direction; looking for change, so I remembered the podcast and thought okay, I’ll check it out. Well, let me tell you, 21-day challenges had quite the impact, not only on my long-term actions but on my immediate mood and goals for that day! I have since become a regular student of Love Your Story and have felt a greater clarity of vision, sense of purpose, peace of mind, and acceptance of the dynamic creative process of embracing and crafting my own story. Love Your Story challenges are simple, effective, and beg to be immediately implemented. I can honestly say the challenges changed my mood and got me excited to take action in the moment I read them–not one of those “I should try this tomorrow” deals. Now, I turn to the Podcasts and challenges when things are going well just to boost my “game” and enhance the quality of my life. I strongly recommend Lori’s challenges to anyone!

              

             I love testimonials! It makes me feel like I’m doing something right! So, now it’s your chance. It’s a new year, the time we all want to start off on the right foot! NOW IS THE TIME.

             Let’s do this! Join the fun and start creating a life story with a little more satisfaction, joy and pizzaz this year – right now! Oh, and don’t worry, none of the challenges will require you to make moral or ethical compromises! It’s all good fun.

             Go to http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/21-day-challenge/ and find the link to start on YOUR 21-Day Challenge. Pass it along to your friends too.

             While this is a very unusual episode for us – shorter than usual, for sure…I wanted to have a chance to introduce you  directly to this big opportunity for learning, growth and experiment. So go try it, and I’ll see you on the inside when we are sharing notes as I read your responses to the challenges.

              

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2473Wed, 03 Jan 2018 09:00:16 -070010:56falsefullLove Your Story was created to help people realize that their life stories are within their control. A platform for ideas and tools that help us shape our life stories and create them on purpose with more joy, love, satisfaction, or whatever you want to write into the story you create with your every day living. Well, since we went live in October of 2016 we have talked every week about a variety of these tools, with the hope in mind that those who are listening are getting ideas, inspiration and empowerment to create healthy, happy, and strong stories, rather than small, scared and heavily burdened life stories that often just come with the territory of living.<br /> <br /> But…that’s a lot of tools. If you’re anything like me, it’s all fine and dandy to know what you should do, but when there is too much to do I just shut down. I go into overwhelm mode and I don’t do anything.<br /> <br /> Well, today we launch the 21-Day Challenge, just in time to start off  2018 with a bang!  Do you want to live brave, bold and joyful as you create your daily story? Well, Love Your Story is about helping you do this,– here is where the 21-Day Challenge comes in. Listen in for an explanation of this fun challenge to start your year off strong and full of growth and possibility.Lori LeeEpisode 67 Habits – Breaking Bad: 3 Steps to Reprogramming your HabitsHabits – Breaking Bad: 3 Steps to Reprogramming your Habits

             What is a new year if not a time to create resolutions, feel crappy when we don’t really keep them, and then create stories in our minds about how we never follow through! Yay – happy new year and welcome back to the habit of attempting a new start toward better ways at the beginning of each new year. We always mean so well. Today, I have a solution that actually has a pretty strong chance of success – a 3 step process that works for changing bad habits.

             Travis Bradberry said, “Humans are creatures of habit. If you quit when things get tough, it gets that much easier to quit the next time. On the other hand, if you force yourself to push through it, the grit begins to grow in you.”

             Our habits create our character. Do you realize you have story habits? Stories that get replayed, over and over in your mind as fact. Since our character is defined by our habits, and our lives are created with our stories, it seems pretty important to consider the habitual stories we’ve got playing on autoplay. Stay tuned today for 3 steps from Michael Bungay Stanier, a Wall Street Journal Bestseller, that will give us a pattern for breaking the bad stories and reprogramming our own minds with better stories. You can also use the 3 step process for reprogramming any habit you want to change, but today we are focusing on actually changing the habitual stories that don’t serve us.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

              

             Neville said, “Health, wealth, beauty and genius are not created, they are only manifested by the arrangement of your mind—that is, by your concept of yourself, and your concept of yourself is all that you accept and consent to as true.”

             In other words, what we believe is true about ourselves is perpetuated by the stories we let play about us – in our own minds, and then these stories determine what we believe is true about us and we behave and allow accordingly, creating our health, wealth, beauty and genius. Our habitual stories create our own concept of self.

             So, let’s ask the first and most obvious question – what do you consent to as true about you?

             Have you accepted your own value, your own worthiness, your strength, resilience, and beauty? Have you embraced your own good heart, your own talents and gifts? Do you embody your badass superhero persona, because in fact, that’s who you are? Or, do you need to change a few stories to get on this track?

             There is a woman I know who raises her grandchildren. She has changed her life of being an empty nester to doing homework, attending sporting events, dealing with curfews and all the fun and challenge that comes from raising kids again. It’s a lot of work and yet whenever you talk to her about it she refuses to acknowledge how absolutely fantastic she is for this beautiful sacrifice of her time, sanity and years of service in taking on this challenge, that exhausts her. She refuses to embrace her own good heart for what it is. She won’t claim her Wonder Woman status. Why? When we do hard things like make it through a layoff, or a car crash, or an illness; when we make it through challenges like a divorce, a lawsuit, a friend stabbing you in the back and we do it with ethics and behavior we are proud of;  when we reach out to others to lift and comfort and make the world better where we can, there is nothing at all wrong with giving yourself a mental high-five and acknowledging that you are doing a great job. Every time you get it right.]]>Habits – Breaking Bad: 3 Steps to Reprogramming your Habits

             What is a new year if not a time to create resolutions, feel crappy when we don’t really keep them, and then create stories in our minds about how we never follow through! Yay – happy new year and welcome back to the habit of attempting a new start toward better ways at the beginning of each new year. We always mean so well. Today, I have a solution that actually has a pretty strong chance of success – a 3 step process that works for changing bad habits.

             Travis Bradberry said, “Humans are creatures of habit. If you quit when things get tough, it gets that much easier to quit the next time. On the other hand, if you force yourself to push through it, the grit begins to grow in you.”

             Our habits create our character. Do you realize you have story habits? Stories that get replayed, over and over in your mind as fact. Since our character is defined by our habits, and our lives are created with our stories, it seems pretty important to consider the habitual stories we’ve got playing on autoplay. Stay tuned today for 3 steps from Michael Bungay Stanier, a Wall Street Journal Bestseller, that will give us a pattern for breaking the bad stories and reprogramming our own minds with better stories. You can also use the 3 step process for reprogramming any habit you want to change, but today we are focusing on actually changing the habitual stories that don’t serve us.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

              

             Neville said, “Health, wealth, beauty and genius are not created, they are only manifested by the arrangement of your mind—that is, by your concept of yourself, and your concept of yourself is all that you accept and consent to as true.”

             In other words, what we believe is true about ourselves is perpetuated by the stories we let play about us – in our own minds, and then these stories determine what we believe is true about us and we behave and allow accordingly, creating our health, wealth, beauty and genius. Our habitual stories create our own concept of self.

             So, let’s ask the first and most obvious question – what do you consent to as true about you?

             Have you accepted your own value, your own worthiness, your strength, resilience, and beauty? Have you embraced your own good heart, your own talents and gifts? Do you embody your badass superhero persona, because in fact, that’s who you are? Or, do you need to change a few stories to get on this track?

             There is a woman I know who raises her grandchildren. She has changed her life of being an empty nester to doing homework, attending sporting events, dealing with curfews and all the fun and challenge that comes from raising kids again. It’s a lot of work and yet whenever you talk to her about it she refuses to acknowledge how absolutely fantastic she is for this beautiful sacrifice of her time, sanity and years of service in taking on this challenge, that exhausts her. She refuses to embrace her own good heart for what it is. She won’t claim her Wonder Woman status. Why? When we do hard things like make it through a layoff, or a car crash, or an illness; when we make it through challenges like a divorce, a lawsuit, a friend stabbing you in the back and we do it with ethics and behavior we are proud of;  when we reach out to others to lift and comfort and make the world better where we can, there is nothing at all wrong with giving yourself a mental high-five and acknowledging that you are doing a great job. Every time you get it right. Give yourself a mental hug and congratulate yourself for doing the best you can! Accept your value, your worthiness, your efforts, your strength and the good intents of your heart.

             In coaching I’ve watched people who absolutely shine with all they have to give, but they don’t know it. In fact, many of them believe the exact opposite, that they are unworthy or broken. They don’t see or acknowledge their own power and beauty in the world. Not out of any sense of humility, it’s just that the negative stories and insecurities have gotten in the way and built up over the years. Too often I’ve watched these stories and insecurities determine exactly what the person dares to embark on. Gorgeous people living well below their potential and tangled in fear because they believe false stories about themselves. It breaks my heart because it’s such a blatant waste of potential joy – that’s why I do what I do, really, because if the tools we discuss can help someone to be less afraid, to change old stories that hold them back, if the podcast will inspire someone to embrace and allow for their own power, well…that’s a fight worth waging, or project worth doing. So how do we change those stories – not in theory, but in actuality?

             Today’s podcast stems from a new book I’ve been reading. It’s called The Coaching Habit -Say Less, Ask More and Change the Way you Lead Forever, by Michael Bungay Stanier. It’s the first part of this book that I’m particularly interested in sharing today – the part where you change your behavior by changing your habits. I bring in his writings because he has a system for actually changing habits. It’s not just talking about habits we know we need or want to change – we’ve talked about the power of getting rid of habitual stories that don’t serve us, but now let me present this tool for creating a new habit. It’s not what you change – because everyone is going to have something different, but HOW to make a change.

             So, let’s acknowledge a couple things – first – we all know that changing old behavior is akin to climbing Everest. Not many people do it, lots die trying, and those who do it successfully put in a lot of work. Well, not to make it overly dramatic, but I feel like Michael’s simple three step program makes changing a habit a lot more accessible. It still takes paying attention and work – but we are superheroes after all. So, we’ve got this.

             Aristotle said, “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then is not an act, but a habit.”

             So, how do we repeatedly create and tell stories to ourselves that exude excellence and help us accept all the beauty we are? The habit we are looking at changing up today is regulating any negative stories coming from that inner voice.

             First, you can do a number of things to make that inner voice more tangible. Martha Beck suggests naming it, picturing it as a different being, a little dragon on your shoulder, a cat, whatever form you want to give that inner voice. Dress it up in sparkles or armor or stick a fabulous beanie on its little head. Create a being you can address, and when it talks you can picture it sitting there babbling on and you can lovingly tell it to stick a sock in it, you’ve got other positive things you prefer to focus on. Maybe you can picture yourself duct taping its mouth shut.

             So we’ve got your inner voice, now let’s talk about how to help it change any negative babble into supportive commentary.

             In Michael’s book he points out that a Duke University study says that at least 45 percent of our waking behavior is habitual and that there has been an increase of grounded findings based on neuroscience and behavioral economics that have helped clear a path for changing habits. He is coming from the place of this research. In a nutshell he suggests there are five essential components – a reason, a trigger, a micro-habit, effective practice and a plan.

             So, first, the reason – if you’re going to bother changing something in your life you usually need a pretty good reason. What is that reason? Often times, Michael mentions that doing it for ourselves is not as powerful as doing it to serve others. So less about what this new habit can do for you and more about what this new habit can do to help others you care about. How does no longer playing small and feeling unworthy serve your family, friends and loved ones? Well, while that’s a rhetorical question, think about the new example you can be to your kids, grandkids, other people who are looking for inspiration and a social go-ahead to live their biggest lives. When you believe in yourself and you risk and you live and create your best story the effect is so broad reaching it’s impossible to actually put a value on it. People look to one another to see what is possible, so when they look to you and see you loving yourself and enjoying life, you’ve given them permission to live well also. Let’s just say everyone benefits when you feel good about yourself. That’s a pretty good reason.

             Second, the trigger. When things happen in our lives it triggers other things – the habits that play out on autoplay. So, when someone rejects you maybe you get angry, maybe you feel embarrassed, maybe you get defensive. When you wake up, maybe your habit is a direct line to the coffee maker. It’s just how you start the day. Maybe when you look in the mirror your first response is to critique and criticize what you see. Maybe when someone tells you to do something your first response is to do the opposite. There are millions of triggers between us all. Hot buttons. What are yours? The first step to changing a habit is to figure out what triggers that habit or else you’ll be into the habit/behavior before you even realize it. So, what’s your trigger for the behavior you want to change?

             If you know that every time you set up an appointment for a sales call that the voice in your head is going to be telling you a story about rejection and eventual failure, well, the sales call is the trigger. If you can pinpoint that when your wife or husband comes home with a depressing story about some negative aspect of their day that you want to strangle them for always dwelling on the negative, well, it’s their negative story that is the trigger. If your mom asking you to do chores ruins your plans and everyday this triggers frustration and anger in you, well then you know that the chore list is your trigger.

             The third step is to determine a micro-habit. Michael suggests that we are more likely to create a new habit if we do not get overwhelmed with the change. So, decide what the first tiny step is in the new habit, something you can do that will take no more than 60 seconds to start to create your new habit. Short and specific. A new plan that heads you in the direction you want to go.  So, as pertaining to the inner voice, if you know that making that sales appointment is going to trigger a fearful story of rejection and instead you want to create an empowering story of success, the first step toward that would be to address the little angel/devil/dragon/hummingbird on your shoulder and say something like – “Thanks for your input, but that’s not working this time.” Then throw out a new story – your new micro-habit, one you’ve created ahead of time that creates the feeling of success. Picture yourself shaking hands and closing the sale. Or, play a short snippet from  “We are the Champions” song whenever you are triggered. Or, picture the deposit in your bank account when the sale closes and the smile on your face. Decide what works for you, but have it ready so that when the trigger comes you have a quick step that takes you in a different direction.

             The fourth step is to practice deeply. Specifically Dan Coyle in his book The Talent Code, discusses the components of deep practice. They are to practice small chunks of the bigger action. So, instead of practicing the whole tennis serve you would practice parts of it – how to throw the ball, follow through, etc. The next part is repetition, repetition, repetition. Do it fast, do it slow, do it differently, but keep repeating the same action. Notice when it goes well. Practice retrains the neural pathways into new routes, new thought patterns. So, whatever that new micro-habit is, practice it. Practice it fast, practice it slow. Practice it.

             The fifth step Michael discusses is to plan how to get back on track. He says,
             When you stumble – and everyone does – It’s easy to give up. “I may as well eat the rest of the cake, seeing as I’ve now had a slice.” The reality is that no one creates a new habit without having to pull themselves back on track. We will have to pull ourselves back on track. We will miss moments, but the key is to already have a plan for those times. “Resilient systems build in fail-safes so that when something breaks down, the next step to recover is obvious. Make your habit a resilient system.”

             So here’s how it works: There are 3 steps that pulls all this together –

             1. Identify the trigger – When this happens – fill in the blank

             
             

             When my boss tells me to put my phone away

             When my 3 year old hits her brother again

             When Bill complains about that same political issue, over and over

              

             2. Identify the old habit – What are you trying to stop doing?

             
             

             I feel micromanaged and I want to tell him to poke it.

             I feel angry and frustrated that I’m not being listened to and I yell.

             I get completely irritated and I get anxious and passive aggressive.

              

             3. Defining the new behavior – What will you do instead that takes 60 seconds or less?

             
             

             Example: When I’m feeling frustrated in our weekly meetings because my boss tells me to put my phone away, instead of letting myself get angry and feel micromanaged I’m going to …fill in the new behavior.

             Example: When my mom gives me a list of chores that frustrates the time schedule I had set out with my friends, instead of getting angry and hating her in my head and stomping around the house I will take a deep breath, shift my plans by 20 minutes, and repeat to myself, “I choose to be a respectful person.”

             Example: Every time I think about the time I was sexually harassed or molested and feelings of shame, unworthiness and fear get triggered, I will instead repeat the following: I didn’t ask for this mistreatment. I am a strong, resilient, beautiful person and this was not my fault.

             Start by writing out these 3 steps for each habit you want to change. Write them down and read over them regularly to help in reminding you what you are changing.

             Ovid said, “Nothing is stronger than habit.”

             As Michael points out in his book – this is good news and bad news. Bad news because habits are hard to break, but good news in that when you get the habits you want in place, chances are good that they will stick.

             So let’s go over those five essential components – a reason, a trigger, a micro-habit, effective practice and a plan.

             And, let’s review the three steps you create with these five components:

             1. Identify the trigger – When this happens – fill in the blank
             2. Identify the old habit – What are you trying to stop doing?
             3. Defining the new behavior – What will you do instead that takes 60 seconds or less?

             
             

              

             I think if take one habit at a time, one thing we really want to change, and focus this retraining of our minds to get rid of the stories that hold us back, and reprogram in ideas and stories that focus on our beauty, worthiness and strength, we are in for one heck of a successful year. Just think if every year for 10 years you successfully changed one bad habit – We’ll I think you’d be further ahead than most. Your challenge this week is to follow this process with just one habitual story that you want to change this year. Write down your trigger, the old habit and the new behavior, then get ready to practice.

             Have fun out there this week creating your best story every day, in the moment! You can access and share all the Love Your Story episodes on www.loveyourstorypodcast.com. You can also sign up for our exciting 21-Day Challenge now available on the website – each day a new challenge for trying out a story tool. After 21-days you’ve tried them all and you get to choose which ones to keep in your life. If you haven’t already signed up, get on and get started. It’s a lot of fun and a great way to start out the new year.

             Subscribe, rate, review and share any episodes you really like with a friend or family member today! Information on the book I quoted today will be in the show notes on the website. See you next week!

              

              

             Book: The Coaching Habit – Say Less, Ask More and Change the Way You lead Forever, by Michael Bungay Stanier

              

              

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2465Wed, 27 Dec 2017 09:00:16 -070023:25falsefullWhat is a new year if not a time to create resolutions, feel crappy when we don’t really keep them, and then create stories in our minds about how we never follow through! Yay – happy new year and welcome back to the habit of attempting a new start toward better ways at the beginning of each new year. We always mean so well. Today, I have a solution that actually has a pretty strong chance of success – a 3 step process that works for changing bad habits.Lori LeeEpisode 66 Interview with Shannon Happe: 2-Time Olympic Medalist: Mental Stories for SuccessShannon Happe Interview – A discussion on the mental stories we need to take us to over-the-top success.

             Welcome back to the next episode in Love Your Story interview land. Have you ever watched the Olympics and wondered what it takes to be one of these athletes who dominate their sport. One of these people who make it to the very top performance level? What type of mind control do they have to conquer the fears, the fatigue, overwhelm? While the Olympics are the display of physical prowess and control, behind the scenes it is a game where one must first control the mind, the stories that can so easily beset us, well…today I am talking with Shannon Happe, 2-time Olympic medalist in moguls, a US Women’s Freestyle Skier and world champion about her story and what it takes to garner that type of success. Stay tuned.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

             Shannon was born and raised in Lake Tahoe, CA and moved to Salt Lake City, UT in 1998 to pursue her dreams of making the U.S. Ski Team and to ultimately compete for the USA at the Winter Olympic Games.  She made the U.S. Ski Team that very same year and had continued success for the next twelve years.  She competed on 6 World Championship Teams, 3 Olympic Teams, brought home 2 Olympic Medals, 7 World Cup Wins, 1 Overall World Cup Title and 6 National Titles.  Since her retirement in 2010 she and her husband, Matt, started up and in 2013 sold their first company, Silver Bean Coffee.  She now has her plate full again with a 4-year-old little girl named Zoe and is now working as a Ski Champion for Deer Valley and has recently launched a corporate team building and inspiration company called Team Empower Hour!

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast Shannon.

             Listen to the podcast to hear the audio version of our discussion. You don’t want to miss it.

              

             To contact Shannon:

             mogulmama@mac.com

             www.teamempowerhour.com

             www.ShannonBahrke.com

              

             Thanks for tuning in to today’s episode. I’m grateful to Shannon for taking the time to share her story and insights, and for you, for being here to listen and learn and hopefully take a piece of inspiration out into the story of your life as you create it on purpose.

             Just a reminder about all the resources on the website: www.loveyourstorypodcast.com – head there for all the Love Your Story episodes past and present – you can listen to them right on the website. There are also wonderful resources for you  – the free audiobook you can download: The Key to Your Super Self – How your stories are the key to your Power. And, you can start the 21-Day Challenge. With a click of a button you can start your journey with 21 Days of fun challenges that provide a structured way for you to try out things that will help add meaning, satisfaction, and connection to your life story.

             See you next week.

              

             ]]>Shannon Happe Interview – A discussion on the mental stories we need to take us to over-the-top success.

             Welcome back to the next episode in Love Your Story interview land. Have you ever watched the Olympics and wondered what it takes to be one of these athletes who dominate their sport. One of these people who make it to the very top performance level? What type of mind control do they have to conquer the fears, the fatigue, overwhelm? While the Olympics are the display of physical prowess and control, behind the scenes it is a game where one must first control the mind, the stories that can so easily beset us, well…today I am talking with Shannon Happe, 2-time Olympic medalist in moguls, a US Women’s Freestyle Skier and world champion about her story and what it takes to garner that type of success. Stay tuned.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

             Shannon was born and raised in Lake Tahoe, CA and moved to Salt Lake City, UT in 1998 to pursue her dreams of making the U.S. Ski Team and to ultimately compete for the USA at the Winter Olympic Games.  She made the U.S. Ski Team that very same year and had continued success for the next twelve years.  She competed on 6 World Championship Teams, 3 Olympic Teams, brought home 2 Olympic Medals, 7 World Cup Wins, 1 Overall World Cup Title and 6 National Titles.  Since her retirement in 2010 she and her husband, Matt, started up and in 2013 sold their first company, Silver Bean Coffee.  She now has her plate full again with a 4-year-old little girl named Zoe and is now working as a Ski Champion for Deer Valley and has recently launched a corporate team building and inspiration company called Team Empower Hour!

             Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast Shannon.

             Listen to the podcast to hear the audio version of our discussion. You don’t want to miss it.

              

             To contact Shannon:

             mogulmama@mac.com

             www.teamempowerhour.com

             www.ShannonBahrke.com

              

             Thanks for tuning in to today’s episode. I’m grateful to Shannon for taking the time to share her story and insights, and for you, for being here to listen and learn and hopefully take a piece of inspiration out into the story of your life as you create it on purpose.

             Just a reminder about all the resources on the website: www.loveyourstorypodcast.com – head there for all the Love Your Story episodes past and present – you can listen to them right on the website. There are also wonderful resources for you  – the free audiobook you can download: The Key to Your Super Self – How your stories are the key to your Power. And, you can start the 21-Day Challenge. With a click of a button you can start your journey with 21 Days of fun challenges that provide a structured way for you to try out things that will help add meaning, satisfaction, and connection to your life story.

             See you next week.

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2427Tue, 19 Dec 2017 09:00:10 -070030:42falsefullShannon Happe Interview – A discussion on the mental stories we need to take us to over-the-top success. Welcome back to the next episode in Love Your Story interview land. Have you ever watched the Olympics and wondered what it takes to be one of these athletes who dominate their sport. One of these people…Lori LeeEpisode 65 Interview with Annadel Lemon: Take Back Your PowerInterview with Annadel Lemon – Take Back Your Power

             During the month of August we had a series of podcasts, one each week, that dealt with the 5 steps of reframing the parts of our stories that are hard, shameful, full of regrets, etc. — the difficult parts of our tales that often hold us back until we can accept them and find the value in the experience. This reframing is such a powerful tool, and on today’s podcast I am excited to interview Annadel Lemon. who has done some massive reframing and has her own way of making that process work.

             When Annadel was 15 years old her father shot her mother and then killed himself in a tragedy that certainly created a difficult story for Annadel. Instead of letting her story hold her back Annadel, “The Freedom Warrior,” instead decided to use her experiences of overcoming negative emotional trauma to help others clearly see their potential and do the same thing, reframing with gratitude, perspective shifts, and allowing for the grief of the moment to be okay. She uses tried and true mentoring techniques and lessons learned on her own journey to help others be more successful, healthy and create better relationships in their lives.

             Annadel has shared her message on TV, radio, and she has two audio CD’s: “Trauma Mamas: Self Care for Adoptive Parents of hard Kids” and “Brain Scrub: Cleaning out Negative Thoughts to Make Room For the Good Stuff.” That one sounds like it’s right up our alley.

             So today, Annadel is going to tell her story and share some of her insights into how to be free from negative emotional trauma by the reframing that we discuss here on the podcast.

             Welcome Annadel

             Let’s start with your story. Do you mind taking us to the story of your traumatic event and then walking us through how you reframed and used it to help catapult you into helping other get free from their difficult stories.

             Tune in to the podcast for my discussion with Annadel about her early tragedies and how she overcame them.

             To contact Annadel:

             annadel@thefreedomwarrior.com

             www.thefreedomwarrior.com – you can find her audio CD’s on her site.

             We all have trauma of different shapes and sizes in our lives. We all have parts of our stories that need a reframe, unless we’ve already done the work, it’s a part of living. Sometimes we’ve already buried them, sometimes they just haunt us, sometimes we pretend they aren’t there, but in my work on the podcast and in Annadel’s work we both seek to bring to light techniques for breaking free from the events and stories that hold us back – so we can be free.  If this has been interesting and you know that reframing would serve you, go back and listen to episodes 46-50 to get a break down of all 5 steps and ideas to consider and steps to follow as you reframe. Also, in today’s show notes you’ll find the contact information for Annadel Lemon if you wish to get in touch with her.

             Also on the website, don’t miss the free e-book/audio book – it comes in both formats – THE KEY TO YOUR SUPER SELF – How YOUR stories unlock your power!  Totally free – go grab a copy and get on the path to better understanding how to harness the power of your stories.

             See you next week and I hope you’re having a great holiday season.

             ]]>Interview with Annadel Lemon – Take Back Your Power

             During the month of August we had a series of podcasts, one each week, that dealt with the 5 steps of reframing the parts of our stories that are hard, shameful, full of regrets, etc. — the difficult parts of our tales that often hold us back until we can accept them and find the value in the experience. This reframing is such a powerful tool, and on today’s podcast I am excited to interview Annadel Lemon. who has done some massive reframing and has her own way of making that process work.

             When Annadel was 15 years old her father shot her mother and then killed himself in a tragedy that certainly created a difficult story for Annadel. Instead of letting her story hold her back Annadel, “The Freedom Warrior,” instead decided to use her experiences of overcoming negative emotional trauma to help others clearly see their potential and do the same thing, reframing with gratitude, perspective shifts, and allowing for the grief of the moment to be okay. She uses tried and true mentoring techniques and lessons learned on her own journey to help others be more successful, healthy and create better relationships in their lives.

             Annadel has shared her message on TV, radio, and she has two audio CD’s: “Trauma Mamas: Self Care for Adoptive Parents of hard Kids” and “Brain Scrub: Cleaning out Negative Thoughts to Make Room For the Good Stuff.” That one sounds like it’s right up our alley.

             So today, Annadel is going to tell her story and share some of her insights into how to be free from negative emotional trauma by the reframing that we discuss here on the podcast.

             Welcome Annadel

             Let’s start with your story. Do you mind taking us to the story of your traumatic event and then walking us through how you reframed and used it to help catapult you into helping other get free from their difficult stories.

             Tune in to the podcast for my discussion with Annadel about her early tragedies and how she overcame them.

             To contact Annadel:

             annadel@thefreedomwarrior.com

             www.thefreedomwarrior.com – you can find her audio CD’s on her site.

             We all have trauma of different shapes and sizes in our lives. We all have parts of our stories that need a reframe, unless we’ve already done the work, it’s a part of living. Sometimes we’ve already buried them, sometimes they just haunt us, sometimes we pretend they aren’t there, but in my work on the podcast and in Annadel’s work we both seek to bring to light techniques for breaking free from the events and stories that hold us back – so we can be free.  If this has been interesting and you know that reframing would serve you, go back and listen to episodes 46-50 to get a break down of all 5 steps and ideas to consider and steps to follow as you reframe. Also, in today’s show notes you’ll find the contact information for Annadel Lemon if you wish to get in touch with her.

             Also on the website, don’t miss the free e-book/audio book – it comes in both formats – THE KEY TO YOUR SUPER SELF – How YOUR stories unlock your power!  Totally free – go grab a copy and get on the path to better understanding how to harness the power of your stories.

             See you next week and I hope you’re having a great holiday season.

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2422Tue, 12 Dec 2017 09:00:45 -070032:15falsefullWhen Annadel was 15 years old her father shot her mother and then killed himself in a tragedy that certainly created a difficult story for Annadel. Instead of letting her story hold her back Annadel, “The Freedom Warrior,” instead decided to use her experiences of overcoming negative emotional trauma to help others clearly see their potential and do the same thing, reframing with gratitude, perspective shifts, and allowing for the grief of the moment to be okay. She uses tried and true mentoring techniques and lessons learned on her own journey to help others be more successful, healthy and create better relationships in their lives.  Tune in to hear her story.Lori LeeEpisode 64 Interview with Emily Chipman – BUSINESS – Managing the Stories Others Have About USINTERVIEW WITH EMILY CHIPMAN – MANAGING THE STORIES OTHERS HAVE ABOUT US

             Is it important to address or manage the stories other people have about us? Is it even possible to change the stories others have about us?

             Welcome back to Love Your Story interview land. Today I bring to you Emily Chipman, a woman and executive coach that I first met in one of my Story Launchpad workshops. She stood out to me because her additions to the conversations we were having were so insightful and spot on that I knew this woman had some great experience and real talent for coaching people.

             Emily is an executive coach with Rusman Consulting, working inside businesses and with business professionals to instigate leader and team behavioral change. Her mission is to make life better for both the leaders and those she works with, and she is truly engaging, uplifting, focused and exceptional at what she does. I’d like to also let you know, that while many can call themselves life coaches, and many do, Emily is actually accredited and trained as a coach. She is accredited by the International Coaching Federation and is one of a select number of coaches in the world certified to use the top behavioral coaching method – the Marshall Goldsmith Stakeholder Centered Coaching, which she does use with businesses all over the country. Stay tuned because we are going to talk about something we haven’t discussed before on the podcast – the idea of how we can manage the stories that others have about us. This is new ground and I’m excited to get into this discussion on how to do this.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

             Tune into the podcast for my discussion with Emily.

             For more information on Emily and her work you can contact her at:

             echipman@rusmanconsulting.com  and www.propelscoaching.com

              

             ]]>INTERVIEW WITH EMILY CHIPMAN – MANAGING THE STORIES OTHERS HAVE ABOUT US

             Is it important to address or manage the stories other people have about us? Is it even possible to change the stories others have about us?

             Welcome back to Love Your Story interview land. Today I bring to you Emily Chipman, a woman and executive coach that I first met in one of my Story Launchpad workshops. She stood out to me because her additions to the conversations we were having were so insightful and spot on that I knew this woman had some great experience and real talent for coaching people.

             Emily is an executive coach with Rusman Consulting, working inside businesses and with business professionals to instigate leader and team behavioral change. Her mission is to make life better for both the leaders and those she works with, and she is truly engaging, uplifting, focused and exceptional at what she does. I’d like to also let you know, that while many can call themselves life coaches, and many do, Emily is actually accredited and trained as a coach. She is accredited by the International Coaching Federation and is one of a select number of coaches in the world certified to use the top behavioral coaching method – the Marshall Goldsmith Stakeholder Centered Coaching, which she does use with businesses all over the country. Stay tuned because we are going to talk about something we haven’t discussed before on the podcast – the idea of how we can manage the stories that others have about us. This is new ground and I’m excited to get into this discussion on how to do this.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

             Tune into the podcast for my discussion with Emily.

             For more information on Emily and her work you can contact her at:

             echipman@rusmanconsulting.com  and www.propelscoaching.com

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2418Wed, 06 Dec 2017 09:00:56 -070023:17falsefullIs it important to address or manage the stories other people have about us? Is it even possible to change the stories others have about us? Today I interview Emily Chipman, an impressive and talented woman and executive coach of CEO of Rusman Consulting. This business-based episode gives hands-on tools for how to manage the stories others have about us, if we need to do so. tune in for actionable steps for changing the way people see you.Lori LeeEpisode 63 – One Warm Coat: Keeping the World Warm One Coat at a TimeInterview with Sherri Lewis Wood – National Founder and Board Chair of One Warm Coat

             As we round our way toward Christmas I wanted to do an interview with someone, or some group, who are serving and loving on people and creating something good in the world. Here in Utah winters are cold and having a good coat is crucial to survival, so when I met up with the organization One Warm Coat I was excited to get their story. One Warm Coat is a national non-profit organization that works to provide a free, warm coat to any person in need. They support anyone –  individuals, groups, companies, and organizations across the country by providing the tools and resources needed to hold a successful coat drive. Coats are distributed in the communities where they were collected, to children and adults in need, without charge, discrimination or obligation. Since One Warm Coat’s inception in 1992, they have worked with our volunteers to host more than 27,000 coat drives and have given away more than 5 million coats. Stay with me for an interview with Sherri Lewis Wood, the National Founder and Board Chair of One Warm Coat.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited about our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you.  Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

             Tune into the audio for the interview, but for more information on how to start a coat drive of your own go to:

             www.onewarmcoat.org

             In 2015 USA Today reported that cold kills 20 times more people than heat does, and an article in 2016 by Climate Depot claims that the US annual averages 144,000 deaths from cold. I’ve often seen the homeless in the winter an wondered how they survived, or on really horrible cold nights thanked God for a roof and a warm haven all the while worrying about those out in the cold. While solving poverty, homelessness and all the world’s problems is too large a project for anyone to take on, One Warm Coat has a great system for helping communities help themselves.

             At this time of year where we focus on giving and the chilly air signals cozy fireplaces, hot cocoa, and TV bingeing, here’s a way, another idea for spreading some love in your community. Have a wonderful holiday season and share the love this year by sharing this podcast with someone you love. If there’s an episode that struck you as really meaningful, think of someone else who would gain from it and pass it along. Tis the season.

             You can find us at www.loveyour storypodcast.com along with Love Your Story T-shirts for Christmas presents and freebies to help you get started on your own story work. Go get the free audio book/e book – you can get it in either form: The Key to Your Super Self – How your stories unlock your power, and get started on the fabulous path to creating your best story this coming year.

              

             ]]>Interview with Sherri Lewis Wood – National Founder and Board Chair of One Warm Coat

             As we round our way toward Christmas I wanted to do an interview with someone, or some group, who are serving and loving on people and creating something good in the world. Here in Utah winters are cold and having a good coat is crucial to survival, so when I met up with the organization One Warm Coat I was excited to get their story. One Warm Coat is a national non-profit organization that works to provide a free, warm coat to any person in need. They support anyone –  individuals, groups, companies, and organizations across the country by providing the tools and resources needed to hold a successful coat drive. Coats are distributed in the communities where they were collected, to children and adults in need, without charge, discrimination or obligation. Since One Warm Coat’s inception in 1992, they have worked with our volunteers to host more than 27,000 coat drives and have given away more than 5 million coats. Stay with me for an interview with Sherri Lewis Wood, the National Founder and Board Chair of One Warm Coat.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited about our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you.  Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

             Tune into the audio for the interview, but for more information on how to start a coat drive of your own go to:

             www.onewarmcoat.org

             In 2015 USA Today reported that cold kills 20 times more people than heat does, and an article in 2016 by Climate Depot claims that the US annual averages 144,000 deaths from cold. I’ve often seen the homeless in the winter an wondered how they survived, or on really horrible cold nights thanked God for a roof and a warm haven all the while worrying about those out in the cold. While solving poverty, homelessness and all the world’s problems is too large a project for anyone to take on, One Warm Coat has a great system for helping communities help themselves.

             At this time of year where we focus on giving and the chilly air signals cozy fireplaces, hot cocoa, and TV bingeing, here’s a way, another idea for spreading some love in your community. Have a wonderful holiday season and share the love this year by sharing this podcast with someone you love. If there’s an episode that struck you as really meaningful, think of someone else who would gain from it and pass it along. Tis the season.

             You can find us at www.loveyour storypodcast.com along with Love Your Story T-shirts for Christmas presents and freebies to help you get started on your own story work. Go get the free audio book/e book – you can get it in either form: The Key to Your Super Self – How your stories unlock your power, and get started on the fabulous path to creating your best story this coming year.

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2348Wed, 29 Nov 2017 09:00:26 -070021:49falsefullAs we round our way toward the holiday season I wanted to interview a person or group who were doing some good in the world. In 2015 USA Today reported that cold kills 20 times more people than heat does, and an article in 2016 by Climate Depot claims that the US annual averages 144,000 deaths from cold. So let me introduce One Warm Coat. One Warm Coat is a national non-profit organization that works to provide a free, warm coat to any person in need. They support anyone -  individuals, groups, companies, and organizations across the country by providing the tools and resources needed to hold a successful coat drive. Coats are distributed in the communities where they were collected, to children and adults in need, without charge, discrimination or obligation. Today I interview their National Founder and Board Chair Sherri Lewis Wood.Lori LeeEpisode 62 Stories of Appreciation: Giving ThanksEpisode 62 Stories of Appreciation: Giving Thanks

             I read a quote once that said, “A person who feels appreciated will always do more than what is expected.” I’m not sure who said it, but I know this is true because of how I feel when someone shows appreciation to me. It’s one of the easiest equations and it never fails: when we show appreciation to another person that person is more likely to help again, they are going to feel great, and they are going to try to exceed your expectations. It’s November, and it’s the month of giving thanks, so I thought I’d do a special episode on what it looks like when we reach out and show appreciation for the people in our lives. Stay tuned for stories from the people who got involved and what that looked like.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

             William James, well-known psychologist and philosopher, said, “The deepest principle of human nature is a craving to be appreciated.”  We all want and need to feel valued for who we are and we love being recognized for our contributions and accomplishments. It’s important for us to know that we have made a difference in the world and to the people around us. When a person takes the time to express real appreciation for something we have done it builds our self-confidence, but more importantly it helps us know we are seen, our efforts have been accepted, and it empowers us. More often than not a simple appreciation also infuses an energy and motivation to work harder and do more. It’s powerful stuff.

             So, I thought I’d proffer a challenge to a few folks around the Northern hemisphere. We’ve got some folks from Utah, from Ohio, even from Canada. Here’s what happened: I extended a challenge to 18 people to participate in this challenge by taking some time to identify someone in their life who is underappreciated, then to show them appreciation and report back on how that went. Of the 18 I challenged, only 5 were willing to take the time to share some appreciation with the people in their lives. These are the wonderful stories of those 5 fabulous people and what went down when they reached out – in their own lives as well as in the lives of those they reached out to.

             Tune in for these 5 stories from these folks who are creating some good in their stories.

             Thanks to Brooks Potter, Sandi Atwood, Jami Furniss, Katie Houston, and Robb Moats.

             One of the things I found interesting was how different people interpret showing appreciation. Jami, for example, speaks the love language of gifts and service, because to show appreciation she helped her daughter with her chores and brought a gift to her co-worker.  Robb and Brooks used genuine conversation or cards. Katie gave a compliment to her piano student.

             Three things in parting: First, there is not a right or a wrong way to show appreciation. It can be simple, it can be involved. Don’t overthink it, just do it in your style! Second, genuine appreciation is one of our deepest needs. It changes our world, it changes our relationships, it changes our own heart and it changes our experiences. It’s worth those few minutes it takes, and really, it only takes a few minutes. Sometimes just a few words. Third, are you someone who is too busy to show appreciation today, or could you find a minute during this season of showing thanks to actually SHOW SOME THANKS? It’s so easy and the payout is so high.

             I’m thankful for everyone who supports and listens to this podcast. Thank you to those...]]>Episode 62 Stories of Appreciation: Giving Thanks

             I read a quote once that said, “A person who feels appreciated will always do more than what is expected.” I’m not sure who said it, but I know this is true because of how I feel when someone shows appreciation to me. It’s one of the easiest equations and it never fails: when we show appreciation to another person that person is more likely to help again, they are going to feel great, and they are going to try to exceed your expectations. It’s November, and it’s the month of giving thanks, so I thought I’d do a special episode on what it looks like when we reach out and show appreciation for the people in our lives. Stay tuned for stories from the people who got involved and what that looked like.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

             William James, well-known psychologist and philosopher, said, “The deepest principle of human nature is a craving to be appreciated.”  We all want and need to feel valued for who we are and we love being recognized for our contributions and accomplishments. It’s important for us to know that we have made a difference in the world and to the people around us. When a person takes the time to express real appreciation for something we have done it builds our self-confidence, but more importantly it helps us know we are seen, our efforts have been accepted, and it empowers us. More often than not a simple appreciation also infuses an energy and motivation to work harder and do more. It’s powerful stuff.

             So, I thought I’d proffer a challenge to a few folks around the Northern hemisphere. We’ve got some folks from Utah, from Ohio, even from Canada. Here’s what happened: I extended a challenge to 18 people to participate in this challenge by taking some time to identify someone in their life who is underappreciated, then to show them appreciation and report back on how that went. Of the 18 I challenged, only 5 were willing to take the time to share some appreciation with the people in their lives. These are the wonderful stories of those 5 fabulous people and what went down when they reached out – in their own lives as well as in the lives of those they reached out to.

             Tune in for these 5 stories from these folks who are creating some good in their stories.

             Thanks to Brooks Potter, Sandi Atwood, Jami Furniss, Katie Houston, and Robb Moats.

             One of the things I found interesting was how different people interpret showing appreciation. Jami, for example, speaks the love language of gifts and service, because to show appreciation she helped her daughter with her chores and brought a gift to her co-worker.  Robb and Brooks used genuine conversation or cards. Katie gave a compliment to her piano student.

             Three things in parting: First, there is not a right or a wrong way to show appreciation. It can be simple, it can be involved. Don’t overthink it, just do it in your style! Second, genuine appreciation is one of our deepest needs. It changes our world, it changes our relationships, it changes our own heart and it changes our experiences. It’s worth those few minutes it takes, and really, it only takes a few minutes. Sometimes just a few words. Third, are you someone who is too busy to show appreciation today, or could you find a minute during this season of showing thanks to actually SHOW SOME THANKS? It’s so easy and the payout is so high.

             I’m thankful for everyone who supports and listens to this podcast. Thank you to those of you who have taken the time to leave reviews and to share with your friends. Thank you!

              

              

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2270Wed, 22 Nov 2017 09:00:47 -070021:49falsefullEpisode 62 Stories of Appreciation: Giving Thanks I read a quote once that said, “A person who feels appreciated will always do more than what is expected.” I’m not sure who said it, but I know this is true because of how I feel when someone shows appreciation to me. It’s one of the easiest…Lori LeeEpisode 61 Interview with the Kjars from 50×52: Update on their Travels Around the USInterview with the Kjars (pronounced Cares) 50 by 52

             The Kjar family sold their home, bought a motorhome, and took their four kids on the road for a year of seeing the country, meeting other kids their age in different parts of the country, shadowing their lives for a day, and learning how to live in cramped spaces for extended periods of time.

             Join us for today’s interview with Matt and Lindsay as we catch up with them on the road for the second time to hear how things are progressing and to get their new stories and adventures they have created since we last spoke in episode 45. We find them in Rhode Island having completed 25 of the 50 States of America.

             Tune in for some of their favorite adventures.

             If you want to follow them:

             Website: 50by52.com

             YouTube: 50 by 52

             https://m.youtube.com/channel/UCZOrNZGr0hXDC_HROgo_2XQ

             Instagram: @50by52 https://www.instagram.com/50by52/

             Facebook: 50by52 in your shoes

             https://m.facebook.com/50by52InYourShoes/

             ]]>Interview with the Kjars (pronounced Cares) 50 by 52

             The Kjar family sold their home, bought a motorhome, and took their four kids on the road for a year of seeing the country, meeting other kids their age in different parts of the country, shadowing their lives for a day, and learning how to live in cramped spaces for extended periods of time.

             Join us for today’s interview with Matt and Lindsay as we catch up with them on the road for the second time to hear how things are progressing and to get their new stories and adventures they have created since we last spoke in episode 45. We find them in Rhode Island having completed 25 of the 50 States of America.

             Tune in for some of their favorite adventures.

             If you want to follow them:

             Website: 50by52.com

             YouTube: 50 by 52

             https://m.youtube.com/channel/UCZOrNZGr0hXDC_HROgo_2XQ

             Instagram: @50by52 https://www.instagram.com/50by52/

             Facebook: 50by52 in your shoes

             https://m.facebook.com/50by52InYourShoes/

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2265Wed, 15 Nov 2017 09:00:10 -070029:43falsefullIn episode 45 we spoke with the Kjar family (Matt, Lindsay and their 4 kids) as they were in the first few months of their trip, via travel trailer, around the United States of America to see what makes us united. Their children get to shadow other children across the country who have very different lives and see how different and how similar we all are. Today we revisit them, a few months later, to catch up on their newest tales. Just having completed hitting 25 of the 50 states of America they have more stories to tell. Tune in to follow along with what they are doing, learning, and experiencing.Lori LeeEpisode 60 Interview with Tammy Johnson and the Tragic Death of her Son – A Choice of PerspectiveInterview with Tammy Johnson and the Tragic Death of her Son – A Choice of Perspective

             In 2016 a dear friend of mine went through an event that many deem to be the worst thing we can experience. The loss of a child. When I first saw the post on Facebook – the fastest way for news to travel these days – I was in utter disbelief. I couldn’t imagine it had happened, and I had no idea what to say or how to even approach her. I called around to check on her but didn’t think it best to join the throngs of people who would no doubt be pounding down her door with their condolences. It was too soon. I imagined she needed to have time to mourn, adjust, do what people do during something so unthinkable. I didn’t know how she would handle it, she was a single mom who had always been close to her son – he was her whole world. Was she going to be rolled up in a ball? Would she start using drugs to dull the pain? Would she be incapacitated for years? When I finally got to speak with her I was beyond surprised at her resilience. Frankly, I was baffled, I certainly didn’t feel that I would have handled such a thing with as much calm as she had. As I spoke to her I found that her choice of perspective in this story was one that allowed for the healthiest possible takeaway.  So, I asked her if she’d share her story.

             Desmond Tutu said, “Hope is being able to see that there is light despite all of the darkness.”

             As you’ll hear in the interview I am careful, even timid in asking her questions, still wanting to be so careful with such a topic. But she agreed to share her story and her perspective so that if her experience and choice of perspective could help someone else some good could be shared.

             Listen to the podcast to hear Tammy tell the story of Hunter’s last day and her response.

             The choice to chose our perspective is always our own. This is such a huge part of controlling our stories and creating our realities, our happiness, our unhappiness, our peace, our jealousy, our envy, our fear, our sadness. I feel like I’ve beaten this story tool to death because I’ve been writing about it so much lately, but that is precisely because it’s the foundation of our happiness. Could Tammy have looked at her son’s death as a tragic loss, unfair, and cruel as it was? Of course, but could she also choose to focus on his relief, on his time with God, rather than her deep pain and loss? That’s what she chose. I’m reminded of the story, I shared in one of the earlier episodes about Viktor Frankl.  Viktor was a prominent Jewish psychiatrist who survived the camps of Auschwitz and Dachau. Viktor talks about an elderly man who came to see him a couple years after his beloved wife had passed away. The man was distraught with grief and couldn’t move on with life because he was severely depressed. Viktor had been through the worst types of suffering, so he understood pain. He sat quietly and listened to the man pour out his grief and sorrow. When the man had finished Dr. Frankl asked him just one questions: What would have happened if you had died first and your wife would have survived you?  Well, the man said, “for her, this would have been terrible; how she would have suffered!” To this, Dr. Frankl replied, “You see, such a suffering has been spared her, and it was you who have spared her this suffering, to be sure, at the price that now you have to survive and mourn her.” The man was so moved by Dr. Frankl’s words that he simply stood up, shook his hand, and left, never to return. At the moment the perspective shifts the burden lightens.

             Your challenge this week is to find one of the stories in your life that you are currently feeling anxiety or pain about. Take some time and consider some other ways of interpreting that story. See what other angles you can take and which angle helps you to deal in the healthiest way with the event at...]]>Interview with Tammy Johnson and the Tragic Death of her Son – A Choice of Perspective

             In 2016 a dear friend of mine went through an event that many deem to be the worst thing we can experience. The loss of a child. When I first saw the post on Facebook – the fastest way for news to travel these days – I was in utter disbelief. I couldn’t imagine it had happened, and I had no idea what to say or how to even approach her. I called around to check on her but didn’t think it best to join the throngs of people who would no doubt be pounding down her door with their condolences. It was too soon. I imagined she needed to have time to mourn, adjust, do what people do during something so unthinkable. I didn’t know how she would handle it, she was a single mom who had always been close to her son – he was her whole world. Was she going to be rolled up in a ball? Would she start using drugs to dull the pain? Would she be incapacitated for years? When I finally got to speak with her I was beyond surprised at her resilience. Frankly, I was baffled, I certainly didn’t feel that I would have handled such a thing with as much calm as she had. As I spoke to her I found that her choice of perspective in this story was one that allowed for the healthiest possible takeaway.  So, I asked her if she’d share her story.

             Desmond Tutu said, “Hope is being able to see that there is light despite all of the darkness.”

             As you’ll hear in the interview I am careful, even timid in asking her questions, still wanting to be so careful with such a topic. But she agreed to share her story and her perspective so that if her experience and choice of perspective could help someone else some good could be shared.

             Listen to the podcast to hear Tammy tell the story of Hunter’s last day and her response.

             The choice to chose our perspective is always our own. This is such a huge part of controlling our stories and creating our realities, our happiness, our unhappiness, our peace, our jealousy, our envy, our fear, our sadness. I feel like I’ve beaten this story tool to death because I’ve been writing about it so much lately, but that is precisely because it’s the foundation of our happiness. Could Tammy have looked at her son’s death as a tragic loss, unfair, and cruel as it was? Of course, but could she also choose to focus on his relief, on his time with God, rather than her deep pain and loss? That’s what she chose. I’m reminded of the story, I shared in one of the earlier episodes about Viktor Frankl.  Viktor was a prominent Jewish psychiatrist who survived the camps of Auschwitz and Dachau. Viktor talks about an elderly man who came to see him a couple years after his beloved wife had passed away. The man was distraught with grief and couldn’t move on with life because he was severely depressed. Viktor had been through the worst types of suffering, so he understood pain. He sat quietly and listened to the man pour out his grief and sorrow. When the man had finished Dr. Frankl asked him just one questions: What would have happened if you had died first and your wife would have survived you?  Well, the man said, “for her, this would have been terrible; how she would have suffered!” To this, Dr. Frankl replied, “You see, such a suffering has been spared her, and it was you who have spared her this suffering, to be sure, at the price that now you have to survive and mourn her.” The man was so moved by Dr. Frankl’s words that he simply stood up, shook his hand, and left, never to return. At the moment the perspective shifts the burden lightens.

             Your challenge this week is to find one of the stories in your life that you are currently feeling anxiety or pain about. Take some time and consider some other ways of interpreting that story. See what other angles you can take and which angle helps you to deal in the healthiest way with the event at hand.

             You are worthy, wonderful and you’ve got some tools to create your biggest, boldest and most satisfying life – so do it. It’s the month of Thanksgiving, so don’t forget to count your blessings and maybe bring some gratitude into those perspective shifts.

             If you like this podcast rate, review and subscribe on iTunes/apple podcast and head to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com to comment, buy the super cool Love Your Story t-shirts, or sign up for the free audio book – The Key to Your Super Self – How your stories unlock your power. See you next week – same time, same place.

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2182Wed, 08 Nov 2017 09:00:39 -070019:30falsefullIn 2016 a dear friend of mine went through an event that many deem to be the worst thing we can experience. The loss of a child. When I first saw the post on Facebook – the fastest way for news to travel these days – I was in utter disbelief. I couldn’t imagine it had happened, and I had no idea what to say or how to even approach her. I called around to check on her but didn’t think it best to join the throngs of people who would no doubt be pounding down her door with their condolences. It was too soon. I imagined she needed to have time to mourn, adjust, do what people do during something so unthinkable. I didn’t know how she would handle it, she was a single mom who had always been close to her son – he was her whole world. Was she going to be rolled up in a ball? Would she start using drugs to dull the pain? Would she be incapacitated for years? Tune in to find out...Lori LeeEpisode 59 Focus on Your Awesome – Run YOUR Race 

             Focus on Your Awesome – Run YOUR Race

             We are all familiar with the saying that what we focus on is magnified. The things we spend our time thinking about become a reality for us, so why might I ask, do we so often focus on our weaknesses, the things we don’t feel like we’re good at? Let’s change that. We have a lot of awesome going on already.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you.  Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

             In the Disney recreation of the events of the Triple Crown-winning horse and Secretariate’s incredible underdog triumph–in the movie Secretariate–there is a scene where Secretariate’s owner, Penny Chenery Tweedy is in the stable, nose to nose with her beloved horse who is just overcoming an injury before his big race. No one is certain how he’ll perform because he hasn’t been feeling well. She looks him straight in the eye and she says, “I’ve run my race by not giving up, (she had fought for the horse for funding, she’d put her families fortune on the line, she’s stood up against other horse owners in media discussions, she had stood up against family pressure in order to get Secretariate to this place, to these races.) “Now,” she continued, “it’s your time to run your race.” The movie ends with the Belmont Stakes race, the third and final race of the Triple Crown, in 1973, and Secretariate is expected to go nose to nose with his rival of the year, Shamm. About a minute into the race, these horses are neck and neck taking turns pulling slightly ahead of one another when Secretariate begins a pull away that at first leaves people scared because they don’t believe Secretariate can keep up that pace. They’re afraid he’ll wear down and not be able to keep the pace.  Those watching the race go from excitement as the horses start out, to anger that the jockey is letting him go too fast too soon, to almost big-eyed quiet as they watch the impossible. Secretariate never falters, in fact, his stead speed increases as he leaves Shamm what feels like halfway around the course and wins by 25 lengths. Even those who don’t care about horse racing get tears in their eyes when watching the footage of this race because there is something about the power of that horse, running his own race, and pulling so far ahead, doing the impossible, and we get to sit and watch it happen. It’s one of those magical moments in history where your heart is simply caught in your throat and your joy and respect for that beautiful animal crowds out all other emotion. I share this scene with you because when Penny turned over all her expectations, told Secretariate that she had already won her race, now he simply got to run his best race, because he could, I felt a sense of freedom and understanding in my own race. I don’t need to run the same race as Chris Ducker or John Dumas or the other podcasters and online entrepreneurs.  I can and should run my own race, born of my own strengths and my own insights and my own definition of success. I get to run my race. Secretariate got to run his race. Penny ran her race. What is your race? When someone says “Run YOUR Race,” what does it feel like to you?

             In episode 25 we talked about how when you bike you look where you want to go, not where you don’t want to go – you focus on the route around the rock, not on the rock that you want to miss. Because if you focus on the rock – you’ll hit it. Every time. With this in mind, it seems to me that focusing on our strengths is a way to shine, hone what we’re good at, and spend less time focusing on that...]]> 

             Focus on Your Awesome – Run YOUR Race

             We are all familiar with the saying that what we focus on is magnified. The things we spend our time thinking about become a reality for us, so why might I ask, do we so often focus on our weaknesses, the things we don’t feel like we’re good at? Let’s change that. We have a lot of awesome going on already.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you.  Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

             In the Disney recreation of the events of the Triple Crown-winning horse and Secretariate’s incredible underdog triumph–in the movie Secretariate–there is a scene where Secretariate’s owner, Penny Chenery Tweedy is in the stable, nose to nose with her beloved horse who is just overcoming an injury before his big race. No one is certain how he’ll perform because he hasn’t been feeling well. She looks him straight in the eye and she says, “I’ve run my race by not giving up, (she had fought for the horse for funding, she’d put her families fortune on the line, she’s stood up against other horse owners in media discussions, she had stood up against family pressure in order to get Secretariate to this place, to these races.) “Now,” she continued, “it’s your time to run your race.” The movie ends with the Belmont Stakes race, the third and final race of the Triple Crown, in 1973, and Secretariate is expected to go nose to nose with his rival of the year, Shamm. About a minute into the race, these horses are neck and neck taking turns pulling slightly ahead of one another when Secretariate begins a pull away that at first leaves people scared because they don’t believe Secretariate can keep up that pace. They’re afraid he’ll wear down and not be able to keep the pace.  Those watching the race go from excitement as the horses start out, to anger that the jockey is letting him go too fast too soon, to almost big-eyed quiet as they watch the impossible. Secretariate never falters, in fact, his stead speed increases as he leaves Shamm what feels like halfway around the course and wins by 25 lengths. Even those who don’t care about horse racing get tears in their eyes when watching the footage of this race because there is something about the power of that horse, running his own race, and pulling so far ahead, doing the impossible, and we get to sit and watch it happen. It’s one of those magical moments in history where your heart is simply caught in your throat and your joy and respect for that beautiful animal crowds out all other emotion. I share this scene with you because when Penny turned over all her expectations, told Secretariate that she had already won her race, now he simply got to run his best race, because he could, I felt a sense of freedom and understanding in my own race. I don’t need to run the same race as Chris Ducker or John Dumas or the other podcasters and online entrepreneurs.  I can and should run my own race, born of my own strengths and my own insights and my own definition of success. I get to run my race. Secretariate got to run his race. Penny ran her race. What is your race? When someone says “Run YOUR Race,” what does it feel like to you?

             In episode 25 we talked about how when you bike you look where you want to go, not where you don’t want to go – you focus on the route around the rock, not on the rock that you want to miss. Because if you focus on the rock – you’ll hit it. Every time. With this in mind, it seems to me that focusing on our strengths is a way to shine, hone what we’re good at, and spend less time focusing on that thing or things we feel like we need to change.  It’s a fact, we are not all good at everything. That doesn’t make us broken. That doesn’t mean something is wrong with us. What it means is that we are in a greater position to need one another – and that’s a beautiful thing. But we can’t run our race or play our part if we are trying to be someone else with someone else’s strengths, or if we are caught up in our perceived weaknesses rather than knocking it out of the park with our own brand of kick-butt awesomeness.

             Full disclosure, I’m guilty of this in my home, we focus on the C that isn’t an A and query after how that can be improved. Too often we forget to celebrate the A’s, instead, we want to improve what we perceive as broken, rather than celebrating what is working. I don’t know if that’s a cultural thing, maybe it’s just a human thing—we look for how to make things better. But what if all along we’ve been focusing on the wrong thing? What if focusing on what is right is the way to make things better?

             Simon Sinek said, “Spending too much time focused on others’ strengths leaves us feeling weak. Focusing on our own strengths is what, in fact, makes us strong.”

             Twenty years ago I read a book called Heaven on earth – 15-minute miracles to change the world. It talked about how to make a big difference in small increments. The author proposed that in order to make a big difference that we get involved in ways that focused on what we are good at doing. Now the finding of this book was a serendipitous gift. At the time I was on the board of directors for CAPSA, the shelter and program for the prevention of sexual and physical abuse in the area I lived in. It was something I very much believed in, and I was honored to be asked to serve on the board, but I was also baffled at the role that I would be able to play. I was by far the youngest on the board, in my mid-twenties, and the rest of the board was made up of influential, and mostly wealthy members of the community. I, on the other hand, did not have the network of wealthy connects most of them already had. How was I going to raise money for the cause? How was I going to help? It was during this dilemma that I found this book. As I read, it made absolute sense to me that everyone should do what they were good at, because most people enjoy doing what they are good at, and then you have fun AND you get more accomplished. You don’t have a bunch of people flailing around in the water, hating what they are being asked to do. With that, I discovered how I could contribute. I could be their writer. As I presented the idea that I would take over the newsletter and help with grant writing, the board was totally on board. I would let those with connections raise the money, and I’d give what I had to give. Focus on my strengths.

             No one else is like you. No one else has the same set of strengths that you have. No one is your awesome self. You were made that way on purpose – given gifts and talents to share and amplify, and what if you focused on celebrating the beauty that you are instead of trying to fix the things you aren’t?

             What if I told you that you had a responsibility to be your best self? You aren’t accidentally made the way you are. You aren’t a burden on the world. You and your own brand of awesome are here to do what only you can do. What is that? I don’t know. I don’t know you, your life, your dreams, your passions, but I do know that when you focus on the gifts and talents, on the things you are naturally drawn to, that you start to step into your space, your calling, your fulfillment. Try it!

             And living small by making excuses that you don’t have anything to give is just ripping the world off, and yourself. It’s a cop-out that might feel humble at first blush, but it’s really just a fear-based response to interacting with the world.

             Now, just to be clear. This way of thinking is not to suggest that we never get out of our comfort zone, try new things, or work to improve things we want to improve. What I’m saying is that I think our improvement, our self-love, and our joy of living will increase when we accept, celebrate and share the things we are good at and focus our energy on that acceptance, celebration, and sharing. We create more of what we focus on – so keep being you in all the best ways.

             Will there be spaces where we enter the learning zone – practice getting better at what we are good at, or try something new we have an interest in, or push ourselves into new realms of doing and being? I sure hope so. But there is a difference between always focusing on what we can’t do, on what someone else can do well, and never celebrating and sharing our own brand of awesome.

             What are you good at? If the first thing that comes to mind is “nothing,” or “I can’t think of anything,” or “not much,” then you are a prime candidate for this work. It means you have NOT spent time coming to understand and recognize your own wonderful gifts. Heck, you don’t even know what they are. How can you be sharing them to the fullness of your capabilities? How can you be lavishing yourself with all that love and appreciation for yourself when you haven’t even gotten to really know your own self. It’s not arrogance to recognize and know your strengths. It’s foundational to being able to live your best life, to know what you have to give and how best to share and contribute.

             Want to figure out what your strengths are? An article from the Huffington Post, titled A Better Way to Discover Your Strengths, suggested that the strength finder quizzes that are available are bound to be a little biased, for example, when asked about generosity we are bound to focus on times we were generous rather than all the times we weren’t. The author says that getting a diverse group of people you know to tell you what they feel your strengths are—and to be specific, share specific examples of when we acted on that strength– and then to compare the responses of 10-20 people, will give you a good feel for what you’ve got going on and what you are sharing with the world. But that’s not the last step…

             Adam Grant, the author of this article said, “… the stories are sometimes so revealing and exciting that people stop there. But if you don’t map out a plan for using your strengths, the benefits will fade. In one experiment led by psychologist Martin Seligman, people who identified their strengths were temporarily happier and less depressed, but the changes didn’t last. Only those who identified their strengths and then actively used them achieved sustainable psychological gains: over the next six months, they were significantly happier and less depressed.”

             Your challenge this week, should you choose to accept it, would be to go so far as to ask your friends, associates, and family what they feel your strengths are – and don’t forget to tell them to be specific with experiences. When I did it, it turned out much different than I expected. I took some razzing from people who thought I was searching for compliments, but it was the responses that surprised me most. Things I thought we weaknesses were actually seen as strengths, ways of being that I didn’t much think about it turns out were very important to others. Try it. See what you uncover. Get to know yourself a little better through the eyes of your people, and see what mysteries you unearth. You’ve got to know if you’re a sprinter, a distance runner, a walker, or a skateboarder if you want to figure out how to run YOUR race. You get to love you, and be you, and make the world a little more colorful because you are.

             Have a great week creating your best story, and don’t forget to do me a huge favor and rate and review the podcast on Apple Podcasts. And, if you haven’t already, do yourself a favor and subscribe to the podcast because then it automatically downloads into your audio library every week when the new episode launches – just waiting for you. Easy peasy. Also, go to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com to listen, leave comments, order your awesome Love Your Story podcast t-shirt, or contact us. We love to hear from you. Follow us on Instagram @loveyourstorypodcast or on FB – Love your story podcast.

              

              

              

              

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2178Wed, 01 Nov 2017 09:00:27 -070014:41falsefullWe are all familiar with the saying that what we focus on is magnified. The things we spend our time thinking about become a reality for us, so why might I ask, do we so often focus on our weaknesses, the things we don’t feel like we’re good at? Let’s change that. We have a lot of awesome going on already.Lori LeeEpisode 58 Interview with Mina Guli – 7 Deserts Run and the 6 Rivers RunEpisode 58 Interview with Mina Guli – 7 Deserts Run and the 6 Rivers Run

             After being pushed into a swimming pool and receiving a back injury where the doctors told her she would never be able to run again. Mina Guli could have used this as an excuse to define her life with limitations and boundaries defined by victimhood. Instead, she said to herself, “Am I going to let this doctor define what I do with the rest of my life?” The answer was NO! She started swimming, then biking, then running, and today Mina has done what is known as the 6 Rivers Run (6 major rivers on 6 major continents in 6 weeks) and the 7 Deserts Run (40 marathons across 7 deserts on 7 continents in just 7 weeks). She has done this to push herself, and she’s cried and struggled in these gargantuan feats, which she’ll tell us about. She also founded a non-profit called “Thirst,” a topic that is close to her heart – bringing attention to water issues around the world, and she’s combined her tremendous runs with her desire to make the world better and to help people understand the plight of water issues around the world. I’ll let Mina tell her story… Stay tuned for my interview with an absolutely amazing woman who has run her way across the world, despite the odds.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

             For the interview listen to the podcast.

             For more information about the runs and projects, or to contact Mina Guli:

             www.thirstforwater.org

             #run4water

             www.minaguli.com

             www.facebook.com/MinaGuliWater/

             “A Life Inspired Series: The Long Run with Mina Guli” — https://vimeo.com/214242697

              

             ]]>Episode 58 Interview with Mina Guli – 7 Deserts Run and the 6 Rivers Run

             After being pushed into a swimming pool and receiving a back injury where the doctors told her she would never be able to run again. Mina Guli could have used this as an excuse to define her life with limitations and boundaries defined by victimhood. Instead, she said to herself, “Am I going to let this doctor define what I do with the rest of my life?” The answer was NO! She started swimming, then biking, then running, and today Mina has done what is known as the 6 Rivers Run (6 major rivers on 6 major continents in 6 weeks) and the 7 Deserts Run (40 marathons across 7 deserts on 7 continents in just 7 weeks). She has done this to push herself, and she’s cried and struggled in these gargantuan feats, which she’ll tell us about. She also founded a non-profit called “Thirst,” a topic that is close to her heart – bringing attention to water issues around the world, and she’s combined her tremendous runs with her desire to make the world better and to help people understand the plight of water issues around the world. I’ll let Mina tell her story… Stay tuned for my interview with an absolutely amazing woman who has run her way across the world, despite the odds.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

             For the interview listen to the podcast.

             For more information about the runs and projects, or to contact Mina Guli:

             www.thirstforwater.org

             #run4water

             www.minaguli.com

             www.facebook.com/MinaGuliWater/

             “A Life Inspired Series: The Long Run with Mina Guli” — https://vimeo.com/214242697

              

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2173Wed, 25 Oct 2017 09:00:34 -070035:34falsefullAfter being pushed into a swimming pool and receiving a back injury where the doctors told her she would never be able to run again. Mina Guli could have used this as an excuse to define her life with limitations and boundaries defined by victimhood. Instead, she said to herself, “Am I going to let this doctor define what I do with the rest of my life?” The answer was NO! She started swimming, then biking, then running, and today Mina has done what is known as the 6 Rivers Run (6 major rivers on 6 major continents in 6 weeks) and the 7 Deserts Run (40 marathons across 7 deserts on 7 continents in just 7 weeks). Tune in to find out why she is doing all this running and how she wants to change the world.Lori LeeEpisode 57 Interview: Annie MacWilliams – Triple Crown Through Hiker: AT, PCT, and Continental Divide TrailINTERVIEW WITH ANNIE MACWILLIAMS

             Today I interview a triple crown through-hiker – What’s a triple crown through-hiker? It’s someone who hikes the three longest trails in the United States – the Appalachian Trail (2165 miles), the Pacific Crest Trail (2650 miles), and the Continental Divide Trail (2800 miles).

             Tune in to hear why she does it, a few of her adventures, and to get a peek inside the head of someone crazy enough to practically live on the trails that weave across the country.

             For more information, or to contact Annie:

             mac5attack@gmail.com

             www.give5more.com

             Instagram: little.endorphin.annie

             ]]>INTERVIEW WITH ANNIE MACWILLIAMS

             Today I interview a triple crown through-hiker – What’s a triple crown through-hiker? It’s someone who hikes the three longest trails in the United States – the Appalachian Trail (2165 miles), the Pacific Crest Trail (2650 miles), and the Continental Divide Trail (2800 miles).

             Tune in to hear why she does it, a few of her adventures, and to get a peek inside the head of someone crazy enough to practically live on the trails that weave across the country.

             For more information, or to contact Annie:

             mac5attack@gmail.com

             www.give5more.com

             Instagram: little.endorphin.annie

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=2048Wed, 18 Oct 2017 09:00:48 -070028:43falsefullToday I interview a triple crown through-hiker - What's a triple crown through-hiker? It's someone who hikes the three longest trails in the United States - the Appalachian Trail (2165 miles), the Pacific Crest Trail (2650 miles), and the Continental Divide Trail (2800 miles). Tune in to hear why she does it, a few of her adventures, and to get a peek inside the head of someone crazy enough to practically live on the trails that weave across the country.Lori LeeEpisode 56 Interview: Access Fund National Conservation Team – Climbing the Nose of El CapInterview: Access Fund National Conservation Team – Climbing the Nose of El Cap

             The Access Fund is a non-profit committed to protecting climbing access and the integrity of America’s outdoor rock climbing areas. They face issues like loss of areas as private land is lost to development, or public land managers regulate the areas, or climbers overuse an area and degrade it. The Access Fund focuses on a couple areas.

             1. Legal policy and advocacy for rock climbers.
             2. Land acquisition and protection
             3. Conservation and making sure the climber aren’t loving the crags to death
             4. Risk management and working with land owner in overcoming liability lawsuits
             5. Educating climbers on Leave No Trace
             6. Helping organize local support at climbing areas

             
             

             As you can imagine this is a herculean effort. One of the programs to help with this is the National Conservation Team. This year there are two young women who make up this team:

             Annabelle McClure from Colorado: a 26-year-old biochemist

             and

             Andrea Hassler from Maryland: a 29-year-old who specializes in applied geography and connecting people with place.

             Join me today for the interview with these two women and the story of their climbing expeditions on El Cap, one of the premier multi-day climbs in the world.

             For more information on the Access Fund or to get in touch with the National Conservation Team:

             ctnational@accessfund.org

             www.accessfund.org

             ]]>Interview: Access Fund National Conservation Team – Climbing the Nose of El Cap

             The Access Fund is a non-profit committed to protecting climbing access and the integrity of America’s outdoor rock climbing areas. They face issues like loss of areas as private land is lost to development, or public land managers regulate the areas, or climbers overuse an area and degrade it. The Access Fund focuses on a couple areas.

             1. Legal policy and advocacy for rock climbers.
             2. Land acquisition and protection
             3. Conservation and making sure the climber aren’t loving the crags to death
             4. Risk management and working with land owner in overcoming liability lawsuits
             5. Educating climbers on Leave No Trace
             6. Helping organize local support at climbing areas

             
             

             As you can imagine this is a herculean effort. One of the programs to help with this is the National Conservation Team. This year there are two young women who make up this team:

             Annabelle McClure from Colorado: a 26-year-old biochemist

             and

             Andrea Hassler from Maryland: a 29-year-old who specializes in applied geography and connecting people with place.

             Join me today for the interview with these two women and the story of their climbing expeditions on El Cap, one of the premier multi-day climbs in the world.

             For more information on the Access Fund or to get in touch with the National Conservation Team:

             ctnational@accessfund.org

             www.accessfund.org

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1949Wed, 11 Oct 2017 09:00:03 -070029:25falsefullInterview: Access Fund National Conservation Team – Climbing the Nose of El Cap The Access Fund is a non-profit committed to protecting climbing access and the integrity of America’s outdoor rock climbing areas. They face issues like loss of areas as private land is lost to development, or public land managers regulate the areas, or…Lori LeeEpisode 55 Interview with the Higgenbotham Brothers – Paddle Boarding the West Coast of the U.S.Today we kick off a month of adventure interviews; stories with adventurers about their feats and stories.

             Interview with the Higgenbotham brothers (twins)

             The Higgenbotham twins are lifeguards from Southern California, endurance athletes, and surfers. Deciding, on a handshake, to undertake the adventure of a lifetime, the two brothers set out to prone paddleboard, using only their hands to propel them, from Alaska to Mexico, down the entire West coast of the United States – 2200 miles, in 2016. A feat never before done, the two experienced, cold, deprivation, broken boards, lost equipment, storms, the kindness of strangers, and moments where they made life affirming decisions. Join me for the live interview with the Higgenbothams after their completion of their trek, and to hear some of their stories.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

             For more information on the Higgenbothams and this trek you can check out their website:

             www.northamericanpaddle.com

             Otherwise, they say the best place to find them is “on the water.”

             ]]>Today we kick off a month of adventure interviews; stories with adventurers about their feats and stories.

             Interview with the Higgenbotham brothers (twins)

             The Higgenbotham twins are lifeguards from Southern California, endurance athletes, and surfers. Deciding, on a handshake, to undertake the adventure of a lifetime, the two brothers set out to prone paddleboard, using only their hands to propel them, from Alaska to Mexico, down the entire West coast of the United States – 2200 miles, in 2016. A feat never before done, the two experienced, cold, deprivation, broken boards, lost equipment, storms, the kindness of strangers, and moments where they made life affirming decisions. Join me for the live interview with the Higgenbothams after their completion of their trek, and to hear some of their stories.

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

             For more information on the Higgenbothams and this trek you can check out their website:

             www.northamericanpaddle.com

             Otherwise, they say the best place to find them is “on the water.”

             ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1933Wed, 04 Oct 2017 09:00:52 -070020:14falsefullThe Higgenbotham twins are lifeguards from Southern California, endurance athletes, and surfers. Deciding, on a handshake, to undertake the adventure of a lifetime, the two brothers set out to prone paddleboard, using only their hands to propel them, from Alaska to Mexico, down the entire West coast of the United States - 2200 miles, in 2016. A feat never before done, the two experienced, cold, deprivation, broken boards, lost equipment, storms, the kindness of strangers, and moments where they made life affirming decisions. Join me for the live interview with the Higgenbothams after their completion of their trek, and to hear some of their stories.Lori LeeEpisode 54: The Stories We Tell OurselvesThe Stories We Tell Ourselves

             Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.  Today we’re taking a quick visit to the stories we tell ourselves and how these create our entire reality. Let me start with a story:

             When I was 10 years old my mom and dad went out for the evening and I was put in charge of babysitting my younger brothers and sister. There were 4 of us. It was dark outside and we were getting ready for bed when suddenly there was a knock on the front door. Who was it? There was no peephole and we looked back and forth at one another. We whispered little questions like “do you know who it is?” “was someone supposed to come over?” “what if it’s a murderer?”  Our body language and big eyes perpetuated the story that there was something to be afraid of.  I, the one in charge, also created fear with my own fear.  Our little kid stories of being alone in a house after dark with the unknown on the other side of the door took over our young minds. We ran, all of us, into my bedroom and hid under the comforter on my bed. The four of us hunkered under the covers, eyes wide.

             When the rap, rap, rap came on the door again…the fear escalated, but I felt someone needed to answer it.  I was babysitting, so I felt it was my role to assign someone to answer the door.  I pointed at my sister, and with a sweep of my finger I assigned her the task of answering the door. She shook her head no, and so I pulled out the threats…”You go answer the door or I’m going to punch you in the nose,” I demanded.

             Her fear of what was behind the door was more powerful than her fear of me, but I had to follow through, so I pulled back my fist and punched her in the nose. She started bleeding and crying and the energy escalated to the next notch. Now there was blood AND fear, and yelling, but no one answered the door.  The four of us lay there, under the covers, yelling at each other and refusing to budge until my parents came home and we could run into the safety of their arms.

             There is a mechanism in our minds that creates gratitude, happiness, unhappiness, envy, joy or jealousy, fear or peace.  Not many of us pay too much attention to this mechanism, despite the fact that it is working all the time, in everyone alive on this planet.

             It is the stories we tell ourselves all day long, every day, about every interaction we have, about ourselves, about our friends, about our spouses, about the things that happen to us! By calling them stories I am not giving them a value of true or false, rather I am acknowledging that they are narrative interpretations we create about our experiences to make sense of our lives.

             Ryan Clarkin, one of my favorite life coaches said, “The most powerful stories we’ll ever tell are those we tell to ourselves.”

             I asked him to go into more detail about this topic, for this episode – here’s Ryan…

             –To hear Ryan’s message, listen to the audio version of the podcast.

              

             Let me share some examples of how we create stories:

             1. You may have a story about how your boss and work environment is supportive and fun. The people you work with are your friends. While someone else in the office may have a story about how the receptionist is always dismissive, the work areas untidy, the boss too caught up in their own dealings to pay attention to them.
             2. You may have a story about how your spouse is a lazy and a slob because after dinner he/she does not clean up their mess. Whereas someone...]]>The Stories We Tell Ourselves

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.  Today we’re taking a quick visit to the stories we tell ourselves and how these create our entire reality. Let me start with a story:

                When I was 10 years old my mom and dad went out for the evening and I was put in charge of babysitting my younger brothers and sister. There were 4 of us. It was dark outside and we were getting ready for bed when suddenly there was a knock on the front door. Who was it? There was no peephole and we looked back and forth at one another. We whispered little questions like “do you know who it is?” “was someone supposed to come over?” “what if it’s a murderer?”  Our body language and big eyes perpetuated the story that there was something to be afraid of.  I, the one in charge, also created fear with my own fear.  Our little kid stories of being alone in a house after dark with the unknown on the other side of the door took over our young minds. We ran, all of us, into my bedroom and hid under the comforter on my bed. The four of us hunkered under the covers, eyes wide.

                When the rap, rap, rap came on the door again…the fear escalated, but I felt someone needed to answer it.  I was babysitting, so I felt it was my role to assign someone to answer the door.  I pointed at my sister, and with a sweep of my finger I assigned her the task of answering the door. She shook her head no, and so I pulled out the threats…”You go answer the door or I’m going to punch you in the nose,” I demanded.

                Her fear of what was behind the door was more powerful than her fear of me, but I had to follow through, so I pulled back my fist and punched her in the nose. She started bleeding and crying and the energy escalated to the next notch. Now there was blood AND fear, and yelling, but no one answered the door.  The four of us lay there, under the covers, yelling at each other and refusing to budge until my parents came home and we could run into the safety of their arms.

                There is a mechanism in our minds that creates gratitude, happiness, unhappiness, envy, joy or jealousy, fear or peace.  Not many of us pay too much attention to this mechanism, despite the fact that it is working all the time, in everyone alive on this planet.

                It is the stories we tell ourselves all day long, every day, about every interaction we have, about ourselves, about our friends, about our spouses, about the things that happen to us! By calling them stories I am not giving them a value of true or false, rather I am acknowledging that they are narrative interpretations we create about our experiences to make sense of our lives.

                Ryan Clarkin, one of my favorite life coaches said, “The most powerful stories we’ll ever tell are those we tell to ourselves.”

                I asked him to go into more detail about this topic, for this episode – here’s Ryan…

                –To hear Ryan’s message, listen to the audio version of the podcast.

                 

                Let me share some examples of how we create stories:

                1. You may have a story about how your boss and work environment is supportive and fun. The people you work with are your friends. While someone else in the office may have a story about how the receptionist is always dismissive, the work areas untidy, the boss too caught up in their own dealings to pay attention to them.
                2. You may have a story about how your spouse is a lazy and a slob because after dinner he/she does not clean up their mess. Whereas someone else in that same situation may tell a story about a hard-working spouse who needs a little support and rest after a long day.
                3. You might have a story you tell yourself, about yourself, every time you look in the mirror, about how ugly you are because you put on 25 pounds after you turned 40, and that no one will find you attractive. Whereas, some in the same situation may focus their story on their health and the beautiful way their body works for them, a focus on the things they love about their body, thus creating a sense of confidence rather than self-condemnation.
                4. You may create a story about how ineffective you are because you aren’t always 100% motivated and beat yourself up over it with little mental jibes around the story – something’s wrong with me, I’m lazy, I’m undisciplined. Whereas another story might instead be focused on the things you DID get done. You build a story – I call it SUCCESSFILE at the end of the day – where you list everything you got done instead of ruminating on the things you didn’t get done yet.
                
                

                 

                The resulting response from the person telling these stories is obvious – If you are telling yourself you’re ugly every day, you will no doubt go out into the world full of self-doubt, most likely more withdrawn and less outgoing as you strive to go unnoticed. If you tell yourself the repeated story of your lazy good-for-nothin spouse your treatment and attitude toward your spouse will be very different than if you are creating a caring space for them at the end of the day. It also changes their response to you and the outcome of your stories. These stories change everything about how you interact with the world and the people around you – how you see the world. In fact, these stories create your world.

                We create stories to define our existence. We create stories to make sense of the things that happen to us. We create stories to share our live events with each other. In my master’s research, I studied the functions of the personal narrative, and there are a litany of functions – we use them to teach – like when a speaker in church shares a story about how helping a neighbor made a big difference in the neighbor’s life. We tell stories to warn, like when we tell someone about the time we got in a car with a bunch of people we didn’t know in Europe and ended up in places previously unimagined, and are lucky we didn’t end up in the bottom of river somewhere or as part of the sex slave trade. We tell stories to share awe like the story about climbing to the peak to watch the sunset and the resulting transcendent experience. We tell stories to create boundaries clearly laying the story about how the last guy that tried to grab your ass got slapped. We tell stories to brag in an acceptable way – like when I tell the story about climbing the Grand Teton in one night – it’s a mix of look what I did as well as a great story. I could go on and on….but the key here is that we CREATE the stories – the perspectives and angles, even in the retelling we create the scene, the moral, the meaning.  Now, most of the time they are our best attempt at honest creations, but they are definitely created from a chosen perspective and the reality is that we have the ability to change our perspectives, on all our stories,  in order to be happier.

                We are the Gods of our stories. We are the creators who define who we are and what we will do and where we will go. There are a lot of stories going on around us. The story we create every day as our narrative of living unfolds. The stories other people create, about themselves and about us, and about the world. But the very most powerful stories, for which we have complete control, are the stories we are telling ourselves about ourselves.  The stories we tell ourselves, about ourselves, define the potentiality of our existence and the reality of our experience.

                If you wake up in the morning and you remind yourself that it’s going to be a fantastic day and you are looking good, feeling good, and bent on creating some love in the world today. You’re going to be heading out, starting ripples in the story of life that will create beautiful things. This is just the start of your day’s story.

                If you start out the day with the voice in your head, –that sounds like fact by-the-way—focusing on your insecurities, creating stories that you’re not enough, you’re too fat, you’re too old, you’re too short, your friends don’t really respect you… well, you can see the difference. The day starts/the story starts, according to the way you let it start. You get to create your reality.

                Zen Habits website – suggests 3 steps for learning to get away from the stories we are hooked on. I’ve taken their suggestions and mixed them with my own experience and understanding of the process – here are my two-cents:

                First step: Start noticing the stories you are creating about the events that go on in your day, and the people you interact with. START NOTICING.

                It’s important to become aware that they are stories you are creating and to notice how they are affecting your happiness or unhappiness. Notice when you get stuck on a story and it plays over and over in your head. Notice the power that creates within you.  What story are you creating right now about your current situation: Is it critical and fault finding, or are you finding the good and the positive going on around you? Just notice the story.

                Second step: What can you do? 1. Consider the story as an option – a filmy possibility, a dream possibility – one way of telling it. 2. Then, consider another option in how you might tell or frame the story. What are other ways of looking at it, other possible perspectives? Is your interpretation really a fact? Did you boss really say he hated your work or did you just interpret his foul mood that way?

                Third step: Don’t react. Sit with the story, don’t cling to it. Don’t lash out – even if you’re caught up in the story. Just be aware of the moment and story as it is without interpretation. This allows you to just be with it and be less attached to it. When you can get to a place of accepting possible options openly consider which story serves you best. Which story approach creates happiness for you and those around you? Then choose the story approach that serves you. This is not about ignoring reality or sticking your head in the sand, it’s about realizing the power of your own mental creations to create your world and your experience, and then choosing how to create it.

                The Love Your Story podcast had its roots in the fact that I had let the events of my life create a space of shame about how my life seemed to have turned out. I wanted to find out if other’s lives had turned out as they expected, and my preliminary qualitative doctorate research indicated that 19 out of 20 people’s lives had NOT turned out as they expected.

                Life is messy, across the board, and that’s okay – but there is a mental badassery in actively creating your life story; in actively reframing the parts of your story that feel broken and hold you back; actively seeking to create your best story and actively loving yourself and your story, because you can!

                Questions: 1. What stories have you made up about yourself? – Remember, you’re going to think these are facts. Let me ask it this way – What do you say to yourself when you look in the mirror? When you think about doing something new? When you think about you?

                We can create stories that generate fear, that paralyze us, like my brother’s and sisters and I did.  The poor harmless neighbor standing on the other side of the door had no idea the ruckus they had caused that night 35 years ago. It was probably someone coming to say hello to my mother, or someone checking in on us, but through our words and our body language, we created a story about the situation that quickly turned to fear, violence, and chaos. Or we can create stories that empower us, that help us conquer the world and whatever small part of it we inhabit – and by conquer the world I mean the worlds of fear, of lack, of judgment, of shame, of not-enough that are a part living this thing we call life. To me, that’s what I see as conquering the world because once we have conquered the limitations and stories that create a limited and sad world for ourselves, we have indeed conquered our own world.

                 When I created the Love Your Story podcast, that’s what I had in mind. Opening conversations about topics that will help us to create our very best life stories – because we can. We ARE THE CREATORS OF OUR STORIES.

                Thanks for tuning in today. If you haven’t already, please subscribe, rate and review the podcast. And, if you’re interested in one of our new – top notch t-shirts, they are available now on the website. Also your challenge for the week –Everyday this week try to get super aware of one of your stories and run through the 3 steps mentioned in this podcast. The more you practice, the more aware you become, and the more you gain the badass skill of creating your biggest, best and most satisfying life stories on purpose. See you next week on the LYS podcast – oh ya, and share this with a friend – spread some good in the world.

                 

                References

                Mental Badassery: becoming Aware of the Stories We Tell Ourselves; Leo Babauta; zenhabits.net/narrative/

                 

                 

                ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1901Wed, 27 Sep 2017 09:00:16 -070018:56falsefullWhen I was 10 years old my mom and dad went out for the evening and I was put in charge of babysitting my younger brothers and sister. There were 4 of us. It was dark outside and we were getting ready for bed when suddenly there was a knock on the front door. Who was it? There was no peephole and we looked back and forth at one another. We whispered little questions like “do you know who it is?” “was someone supposed to come over?” “what if it’s a murderer?” Our body language and big eyes perpetuated the story that there was something to be afraid of... Tune in for the rest of the story, and a few thoughts on how we create the stories that propel us forward or hold us back.Lori LeeEpisode 53 Interview with Rob Holmes – BUSINESS – Founder and Chief Strategist of GLP Films: How to Identify Your Next Great StoryInterview with Rob Holmes – Founder and Chief Strategist of GLP Films

                How to Identify Your Next Great Story

                Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast! Today we are back in business interview land where we talk with professionals who have learned the true value of story in business, and they share their knowledge and ideas with us on how to use story in our professional spaces.

                Today we get to talk with Rob Holmes – the Founder and Chief Strategist of GLP Films, the leading content marketing agency dedicated to authentic storytelling and digital content strategy within the travel and outdoor industry.  Robs authentic approach to storytelling helps his clients identify and develop the best way to grow their business, and usually, that’s by helping them tell their story. He has a diverse background in multimedia production, conservation, marketing, and entrepreneurship. Rob has spearheaded partnerships with global travel brands including international and domestic tourism boards in Peru, Mexico, Chile, to name a few. He’s created partnerships with media publications like National Geographic and Travel and Leisure. Rob holds an MBA from the University of Washington in International Business, Marketing, and Environment Management.

                So, with that introduction, stay tuned for my discussion with Rob about HOW TO IDENTIFY YOUR NEXT GREAT STORY.

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                Listen to the podcast to hear my discussion with Rob and get his tips for finding your next great story.

                 

                For more information on Rob Holmes and GLP Films:

                 

                Watch the full Mina Guli film: www.glpfilms.com/mina-film

                Website: www.glpfilms.com

                Youtube: www.youtube.com/greenlivingproject

                Facebook: www.facebook.com/glpfilms

                Instagram: www.instagram.com/glpfilms

                Twitter: www.twitter.com/glpfilms

                 

                ]]>Interview with Rob Holmes – Founder and Chief Strategist of GLP Films

                How to Identify Your Next Great Story

                Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast! Today we are back in business interview land where we talk with professionals who have learned the true value of story in business, and they share their knowledge and ideas with us on how to use story in our professional spaces.

                Today we get to talk with Rob Holmes – the Founder and Chief Strategist of GLP Films, the leading content marketing agency dedicated to authentic storytelling and digital content strategy within the travel and outdoor industry.  Robs authentic approach to storytelling helps his clients identify and develop the best way to grow their business, and usually, that’s by helping them tell their story. He has a diverse background in multimedia production, conservation, marketing, and entrepreneurship. Rob has spearheaded partnerships with global travel brands including international and domestic tourism boards in Peru, Mexico, Chile, to name a few. He’s created partnerships with media publications like National Geographic and Travel and Leisure. Rob holds an MBA from the University of Washington in International Business, Marketing, and Environment Management.

                So, with that introduction, stay tuned for my discussion with Rob about HOW TO IDENTIFY YOUR NEXT GREAT STORY.

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                Listen to the podcast to hear my discussion with Rob and get his tips for finding your next great story.

                 

                For more information on Rob Holmes and GLP Films:

                 

                Watch the full Mina Guli film: www.glpfilms.com/mina-film

                Website: www.glpfilms.com

                Youtube: www.youtube.com/greenlivingproject

                Facebook: www.facebook.com/glpfilms

                Instagram: www.instagram.com/glpfilms

                Twitter: www.twitter.com/glpfilms

                 

                ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1895Wed, 20 Sep 2017 09:00:11 -070023:47falsefullInterview with Rob Holmes – Founder and Chief Strategist of GLP Films How to Identify Your Next Great Story Welcome back to the Love Your Story podcast! Today we are back in business interview land where we talk with professionals who have learned the true value of story in business, and they share their knowledge…Lori LeeEpisode 52 Interview with Star Coulbrooke – Poet Laureate of Logan, UtahInterview with Star Coulbrooke the Poet Laureate of Logan, Utah.

                Our life stories are poetry in the making.

                Poetry is story at its most distilled; story where every word matters; story rich in image and sound and power. Today I am excited to introduce Star Coulbrooke, Poet Laureate for the City of Logan, Utah, she is also the co-founder and coordinator of Helicon West, a bi-monthly open readings venue. She is published in literary magazines and anthologies, her poems are also available in chapbooks, notably Thin Spines of Memory and Walking the Bear. Star is also the director of the Utah State University Writing Center.  Poetry is a genre that is close to my heart. I have written poetry since I was a child, so I’m especially excited to discuss how poetry and story align. Stay tuned for our interview with Star – a wisp of a woman with spiky red hair who has a story you won’t want to miss.

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee and I’m excited about for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. The power of story serves you best when you know how to use it.

                 

                Listen to the podcast to get the details of the discussion with Star.

                To contact Star Coulbrooke:

                Star.coulbrooke@usu.edu

                Send requests for the Poet Laureate to Diane Buist diane.buist@usu.edu the USU English Department media specialist. Or, to Joseph Anderson joseph.anderson@loganutah.org  the Logan Library adult literature director. Or, Teresa HarrisTeresa.harris@loganutah.org –the Logan City recorder–for posting on the Facebook sites they maintain for the Logan City Poet Laureate. 

                 

                Poets take language and weave it into a story that explores the dark corners, the emotional epiphanies, the roller coaster ride of living and dreaming, and the mundane.  Poets weave truth, imaginings, blessings, and riots of color. They weave the raw, the vulnerable, the real,  and then they sleep on it and start again in the living of their own stories and watching the world and the stories unfolding all around us.

                David Carradine said, “If you can’t be the poet, be the poem.”  Your challenge for this week is to live poetically or maybe find a moment to sit down and put some of your thoughts on paper. I find when I write and write, unedited, that I find poetry as I sift through the words.  You are a poem. Your life story is a poetry all its own. You can write it out to make sense of it – very therapeutic, or you can just keep on living the richness, the simpleness, the greatness of each smile, each moment of gratitude, each brave moment of acceptance and daring, each small and poetic tear and tantrum, each day in your own way. Have fun creating your story this week. Share this podcast – subscribe, rate and review! Thanks for listening.

                 

                ]]>Interview with Star Coulbrooke the Poet Laureate of Logan, Utah.

                Our life stories are poetry in the making.

                Poetry is story at its most distilled; story where every word matters; story rich in image and sound and power. Today I am excited to introduce Star Coulbrooke, Poet Laureate for the City of Logan, Utah, she is also the co-founder and coordinator of Helicon West, a bi-monthly open readings venue. She is published in literary magazines and anthologies, her poems are also available in chapbooks, notably Thin Spines of Memory and Walking the Bear. Star is also the director of the Utah State University Writing Center.  Poetry is a genre that is close to my heart. I have written poetry since I was a child, so I’m especially excited to discuss how poetry and story align. Stay tuned for our interview with Star – a wisp of a woman with spiky red hair who has a story you won’t want to miss.

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee and I’m excited about for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. The power of story serves you best when you know how to use it.

                 

                Listen to the podcast to get the details of the discussion with Star.

                To contact Star Coulbrooke:

                Star.coulbrooke@usu.edu

                Send requests for the Poet Laureate to Diane Buist diane.buist@usu.edu the USU English Department media specialist. Or, to Joseph Anderson joseph.anderson@loganutah.org  the Logan Library adult literature director. Or, Teresa HarrisTeresa.harris@loganutah.org –the Logan City recorder–for posting on the Facebook sites they maintain for the Logan City Poet Laureate. 

                 

                Poets take language and weave it into a story that explores the dark corners, the emotional epiphanies, the roller coaster ride of living and dreaming, and the mundane.  Poets weave truth, imaginings, blessings, and riots of color. They weave the raw, the vulnerable, the real,  and then they sleep on it and start again in the living of their own stories and watching the world and the stories unfolding all around us.

                David Carradine said, “If you can’t be the poet, be the poem.”  Your challenge for this week is to live poetically or maybe find a moment to sit down and put some of your thoughts on paper. I find when I write and write, unedited, that I find poetry as I sift through the words.  You are a poem. Your life story is a poetry all its own. You can write it out to make sense of it – very therapeutic, or you can just keep on living the richness, the simpleness, the greatness of each smile, each moment of gratitude, each brave moment of acceptance and daring, each small and poetic tear and tantrum, each day in your own way. Have fun creating your story this week. Share this podcast – subscribe, rate and review! Thanks for listening.

                 

                ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1888Wed, 13 Sep 2017 09:00:51 -070030:00falsefullPoets take language and weave it into a story that explores the dark corners, the emotional epiphanies, the roller coaster ride of living and dreaming, and the mundane. Poets weave truth, imaginings, blessings, and riots of color. They weave the raw, the vulnerable, the real, and then they sleep on it and start again in the living of their own stories and watching the world and the stories unfolding all around us. Star Coulbrooke, the Poet Laureate of Logan, Utah, has her own story of how she found her poetry, lost her poetry, and found it again as she created her life on purpose. In this interview Star shares some of her personal story, stories and experiences she's created as the Poet Laureate in a northern Utah university town, and we discuss how the process of living our lives is the process of creating poetry through the details and emotion involved in the wild ride of life. Join us for this beautiful conversation with a woman who creates poetry and helps others to find the poetry in their own lives.Lori LeeEpisode 51 The March for Utah’s Public Lands – Being an Instigator of Change in the Bigger StoryEpisode 51: A Political Story about the newly designated Bear’s Ears National Monument and those who are willing to fight for its survival.

                For contact information for Utah senators, go to: http://senate.utah.gov/

                When President Obama designated the Bears Ears National Monument he gave the following speech – The White House; Office of the Press Secretary.

                December 28, 2016

                Statement by the President on the Designation of Bears Ears National Monument and Gold Butte National Monument

                Today, I am designating two new national monuments in the desert landscapes of southeastern Utah and southern Nevada to protect some of our country’s most important cultural treasures, including abundant rock art, archeological sites, and lands considered sacred by Native American tribes.  Today’s actions will help protect this cultural legacy and will ensure that future generations are able to enjoy and appreciate these scenic and historic landscapes. Importantly, today I have also established a Bears Ears Commission to ensure that tribal expertise and traditional knowledge help inform the management of the Bears Ears National Monument and help us to best care for its remarkable national treasures.

                Following years of public input and various proposals to protect both of these areas, including legislation and a proposal from tribal governments in and around Utah, these monuments will protect places that a wide range of stakeholders all agree are worthy of protection. We also have worked to ensure that tribes and local communities can continue to access and benefit from these lands for generations to come.

                ####

                For the state of Utah this has caused great controversy between government officials, Utah citizens, visiting tourists, outdoor recreationalists and industry professionals, and Native American Tribes. Listen to the whole podcast for real interviews with those who took to the streets to declare their support for public lands in an attempt to get the Utah governor and other Utah government officials who are opposed to it, to understand that there are many people who want the designation to remain; people who support public lands and the beauty and history the designation protects for generations to come.

                Creating our stories is something we do on a personal level. It’s also something we do on the big picture level. It’s those who dare to fight for the things they believe in, the heroes that stand up against the antagonists to create the world they believe should exist that determine how that world evolves. This podcast episode talks to some of those people who are out creating life stories backed by their ethics, principles, and sense of adventure.

                 

                 

                ]]>Episode 51: A Political Story about the newly designated Bear’s Ears National Monument and those who are willing to fight for its survival.

                For contact information for Utah senators, go to: http://senate.utah.gov/

                When President Obama designated the Bears Ears National Monument he gave the following speech – The White House; Office of the Press Secretary.

                December 28, 2016

                Statement by the President on the Designation of Bears Ears National Monument and Gold Butte National Monument

                Today, I am designating two new national monuments in the desert landscapes of southeastern Utah and southern Nevada to protect some of our country’s most important cultural treasures, including abundant rock art, archeological sites, and lands considered sacred by Native American tribes.  Today’s actions will help protect this cultural legacy and will ensure that future generations are able to enjoy and appreciate these scenic and historic landscapes. Importantly, today I have also established a Bears Ears Commission to ensure that tribal expertise and traditional knowledge help inform the management of the Bears Ears National Monument and help us to best care for its remarkable national treasures.

                Following years of public input and various proposals to protect both of these areas, including legislation and a proposal from tribal governments in and around Utah, these monuments will protect places that a wide range of stakeholders all agree are worthy of protection. We also have worked to ensure that tribes and local communities can continue to access and benefit from these lands for generations to come.

                ####

                For the state of Utah this has caused great controversy between government officials, Utah citizens, visiting tourists, outdoor recreationalists and industry professionals, and Native American Tribes. Listen to the whole podcast for real interviews with those who took to the streets to declare their support for public lands in an attempt to get the Utah governor and other Utah government officials who are opposed to it, to understand that there are many people who want the designation to remain; people who support public lands and the beauty and history the designation protects for generations to come.

                Creating our stories is something we do on a personal level. It’s also something we do on the big picture level. It’s those who dare to fight for the things they believe in, the heroes that stand up against the antagonists to create the world they believe should exist that determine how that world evolves. This podcast episode talks to some of those people who are out creating life stories backed by their ethics, principles, and sense of adventure.

                 

                 

                ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1884Wed, 06 Sep 2017 09:00:45 -070028:08falsefullJoin us today for interviews with those who marched on the Utah State Capital to make a peaceful but loud protest regarding the Utah government officials attempt to reverse the Bears Ears National Monument designation that was established in December of 2016 before President Obama left office. We go straight to the march and you get to hear their stories.Lori LeeEpisode 50 How to Re-frame Your Difficult Stories: Step 5 (Workshop 5-part Series)How to Reframe Your Difficult Stories: 5 Part Workshop Series: Step 5– The Final Reframe

                At any given moment you have the power to say, “This is NOT how the story is going to end.” Join us today as we discuss the 5^th and final step in reframing the chapters of your story that feel broken. Today we’ll put all the previous steps together to come to the final reframing of your story. Get ready to rewrite the broken chapters for good.

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                If you are just popping into this episode, I suggest you go back and listen to episodes 46 through 49 before moving onto this one. There are five steps in the process to reframing the chapters of your life that feel broken, or shameful, or you’re just not okay with them. This is the 5^th and final step. The step where everything from the previous 4 steps is brought together to help you create your final reframing and advanced understanding of your story. So, if you haven’t you’ll want to listen to the previous 4 episodes, each one dedicated to one of the steps. Now for step #5 – the actual reframe

                Reframing is looking at a story or event in our lives through a different frame of understanding: hence, the RE frame. Often we are very stuck in our own interpretation of our stories, despite the fact, as we discussed in step 4, that there are many ways to interpret a situation. We see things only as we see things and it’s a process to discover other options. When I was doing the work to reframe my stories, I could not see another way to interpret the things that had happened to me. It took another person to help me see what I couldn’t see on my own.

                In 2010, in The Huffington Post, Lifestyle Blog, Racheal Freed posted a blog post titled “The Importance of Telling our Stories.”  She tells a story from her life journey and why she feels it’s important to tell our stories. She also had a friend help with her reframe. (quick note – sometimes this in NOT a one person job because we are so stuck in our story. This is where you may need a coach or the right friend or a therapist)

                Let me tell her story in her words:

                “The first morning after arriving in Tunis, Oct. 1, 2010, my two sister travelers and I ventured deep into the Tunis Medina (an ancient walled city) to visit the home where I lived some 44 years ago. (At the time, my then-husband and I were New Peace Corps volunteers, and we “inherited” this palace of a 19th-century minister from Peace Corps architects who’d lived there during their service.)

                In our first week in Tunisia, during September 1966, we made our way, with great naïveté and some trepidation, into the hills of the romantic blue and white Mediterranean coastal town to negotiate a lease for this house with its owner, a shrewd old patriarch. We were served tea, our new language skills were tested, and the rent was agreed upon — exactly what the old man asked for.

                The house, traditionally built, was completely invisible from the street except for its tall, arched doorway and decorative door. Its rooms were designed on three sides of an interior courtyard. Its arched plaster ceilings, lavishly sculpted in plaster was hung with ornate crystal chandeliers, and the lower halves of the interior walls were encrusted with tiles set in colorful geometric patterns.

                Its 30-square-foot, marble-paved courtyard had its own well; its walls were tile-decorated and its windows to the interior rooms protected and ornamented in painted metal grill...]]>How to Reframe Your Difficult Stories: 5 Part Workshop Series: Step 5– The Final Reframe

                At any given moment you have the power to say, “This is NOT how the story is going to end.” Join us today as we discuss the 5^th and final step in reframing the chapters of your story that feel broken. Today we’ll put all the previous steps together to come to the final reframing of your story. Get ready to rewrite the broken chapters for good.

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                If you are just popping into this episode, I suggest you go back and listen to episodes 46 through 49 before moving onto this one. There are five steps in the process to reframing the chapters of your life that feel broken, or shameful, or you’re just not okay with them. This is the 5^th and final step. The step where everything from the previous 4 steps is brought together to help you create your final reframing and advanced understanding of your story. So, if you haven’t you’ll want to listen to the previous 4 episodes, each one dedicated to one of the steps. Now for step #5 – the actual reframe

                Reframing is looking at a story or event in our lives through a different frame of understanding: hence, the RE frame. Often we are very stuck in our own interpretation of our stories, despite the fact, as we discussed in step 4, that there are many ways to interpret a situation. We see things only as we see things and it’s a process to discover other options. When I was doing the work to reframe my stories, I could not see another way to interpret the things that had happened to me. It took another person to help me see what I couldn’t see on my own.

                In 2010, in The Huffington Post, Lifestyle Blog, Racheal Freed posted a blog post titled “The Importance of Telling our Stories.”  She tells a story from her life journey and why she feels it’s important to tell our stories. She also had a friend help with her reframe. (quick note – sometimes this in NOT a one person job because we are so stuck in our story. This is where you may need a coach or the right friend or a therapist)

                Let me tell her story in her words:

                “The first morning after arriving in Tunis, Oct. 1, 2010, my two sister travelers and I ventured deep into the Tunis Medina (an ancient walled city) to visit the home where I lived some 44 years ago. (At the time, my then-husband and I were New Peace Corps volunteers, and we “inherited” this palace of a 19th-century minister from Peace Corps architects who’d lived there during their service.)

                In our first week in Tunisia, during September 1966, we made our way, with great naïveté and some trepidation, into the hills of the romantic blue and white Mediterranean coastal town to negotiate a lease for this house with its owner, a shrewd old patriarch. We were served tea, our new language skills were tested, and the rent was agreed upon — exactly what the old man asked for.

                The house, traditionally built, was completely invisible from the street except for its tall, arched doorway and decorative door. Its rooms were designed on three sides of an interior courtyard. Its arched plaster ceilings, lavishly sculpted in plaster was hung with ornate crystal chandeliers, and the lower halves of the interior walls were encrusted with tiles set in colorful geometric patterns.

                Its 30-square-foot, marble-paved courtyard had its own well; its walls were tile-decorated and its windows to the interior rooms protected and ornamented in painted metal grill work. This was a space made for entertaining and displaying its ancient Muslim architectural tradition!

                Our first “reception” was a coffee and croissant breakfast for 80 to 100 people on Thanksgiving morning of 1966. Peace Corps volunteers from Massachusetts and California and those working in Tunis were invited along with the American Ambassador and other American officials to meet and greet young Senator Ted Kennedy and John Tunney, the boxer’s son and House of Representatives member, as they traveled North Africa.

                Back from memory to my 2010 journey: A taxi deposited us on the street. We walked a short distance and turned onto my narrow, unpaved street. I found the huge door at #14 and entered its dark corridor that led to our door. My heart was racing, my long-anticipated visit laced with fears that the house had been left uncared for and had fallen to ruin, that no one would be at home to answer the door, that my long-forgotten language skills would not be persuasive enough for us to be allowed in, or that the house, in reality, would not be as I remembered it.

                It felt strange for there to be so much light at the end of the dark corridor I remembered. I reached its end and turned right to knock on the door, but there was no door, just a gaping opening — the light was not from my fondly remembered courtyard. There was nothing there!

                What had been was no longer there and was, in 2010, an open field filled with three-foot-high weeds, some plastic bottles and trash. The outer walls were somewhat intact surrounding this weedy lot and on them were markings where outer wall arches had once been. Not a tile, not a remnant of plaster sculpture, not a piece of marble. There were no remains.

                I stood amidst the weeds, stunned, paralyzed into complete silence and disbelief. My memory held all these years, my beloved Ben Mustapha home of beauty and place of welcome to so many, was gone. Collapsing into the arms of my fellow volunteer, friend and traveler, I wept…

                When I returned home, my closest friend listened to my story. She said it reminded her of what concentration camp survivors must have experienced when they returned home after World War II to find their old reality gone, just a memory. This jolted me to begin to put my experience into perspective. My heart opened beyond myself. I felt compassion as I considered the many millions over centuries who have lost their homes and way of life because of wars and catastrophes as recent as those in Darfur, in the Gulf after Katrina, in Port-au-Prince after the earthquake, from tsunamis and floods all over the planet.

                And what have I gained by sharing my story? The ability to see beyond it. To notice that I’m not the only one who experiences disappointment and loss. I feel deeper compassion for those sustaining great losses. My respect for human resiliency has grown, as has my commitment to help people who must start over completely after devastating loss: rebuilding lives, homes, and hope.”

                The five steps of reframing your story allow you to step onto a path and start a process in a healthy and healing way, taking it one step at a time. It’s a process designed to specifically assist in dealing with our difficult stories. This final step: the reframe, is actually the combination of all the pieces you have created with the following four steps: If you have fully accepted, releasing any shame, your story to be what it is no matter how much you wish it was different. If you have claimed it and allowed it to be, then you are prepared to be able to tell it, out loud, in words, in a safe place. Saying it aloud, with less cringing, with the acceptance from the previous step, the story loses some of its hold on you. Bringing it into the light naturally does that. Once you have completed those two steps, and it may take a little time, you then start the work of finding the meaning behind the experience. With this meaning there is something beyond pain and disappointment that come from our most difficult experiences. We figure out what that is, and often the great power in this step is that we begin to see the strength and power, the growth and the beauty rise from the ashes. After step three when we can see some of the gold being sifted out from the dross, we move on to the fourth step, and maybe the most difficult, of taking apart our lenses and the truth about the way we interpret things and the ways others may have been interpreting events, and reconsidering that our interpretation is not necessarily fact, but that there are other ways and perspectives available and probable, and perhaps that understanding can help you find the new frame. Step five is the process of putting them all together, getting clear on what your reframe looks like. From here, I suggest writing it down or recording it so that you can reset in your heart and mind.

                An article in Inc. magazine says that those who write things out by hand have better recall and conceptual understanding of the material.  Research by Pam Mueller and Daniel Oppenheimer demonstrates that students who write out their notes on paper actually learn more. Across three experiments “Those who wrote out their notes by hand had a stronger conceptual understanding and were more successful in applying and integrating the material than those who took notes with their laptops.”

                When you are trying to reprogram a long held story and carefully guarded story there can be great power in the process of rewriting it – flushing it out in the new frame, and in words rather than just ideas.

                Step five is taking all the previous work you’ve done and synthesizing it into the final reframe that serves you in a more productive way. For me, shifting from looking at my life as broken, because it didn’t live up to the expectations within my religious teachings, or within what felt like acceptable and respectable bounds culturally, me coming to peace with it because I could look at what I had gained and how that had made me better instead of broken, it changed everything. Instead of shame and embarrassment, there was acceptance and realization of the process of living – like the making of a pearl – when an irritant, an invader into the mollusk becomes covered in lacre, layer after layer, a valuable item of beauty is created. This frame allowed me to find an inner peace, to share my story more openly when needed, to accept myself and my life path rather than constantly wonder how in the hell I got here.

                Your reframe may be like Rachael’s where you gain an insight into life that deepens your understanding in deep and beautiful ways and helps to change the world through your efforts in new ways. It may be like mine where most important was the move to loving my story with all its broken parts as well as its extravagant blessings and joys. Your reframe gets to be what it is to you, but if it provides a way to love and accept your journey or yourself and moves you toward loving your story in any way, then it’s worth every effort, because the stories we tell to ourselves, about ourselves, determine who we become. Determine our own confidence, our own peace, our interactions with the world and the good we do. This work is important!

                Martha Beck, renowned life coach said, “No part of your experience is wasted. Everything you’ve experienced so far is part of what you were meant to learn.”

                I hope you have enjoyed and found value in these five steps. I would love to hear how the process goes for you, what you need continued guidance in, and suggestions and ideas you come up with during your process. Please go to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and hit up the Contact Us page. We want to hear from you. And, stay tuned for coming episodes where we listened to you and are bringing in more stories, as told by those who lived them. See you in the next episode.

                ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1881Wed, 30 Aug 2017 09:00:06 -070016:14falsefullAt any given moment you have the power to say, “This is NOT how the story is going to end.” Join us today as we discuss the 5th and final step in reframing the chapters of your story that feel broken. Today we’ll put all the previous steps together to come to the final reframing of your story. Get ready to rewrite the broken chapters for good.Lori LeeEpisode 49 How to Re-Frame Your Difficult Stories: Step 4 (Workshop 5-Part Series)How to Reframe Your Difficult Stories: 5 Part Workshop Series: Step 4– Changing Lenses

                A farmer stood with his dog overlooking his fields. Behind them in the grasses peered a small brown rabbit, and above flew a lark. The farmer looked across the field and saw cows, milk, provisions for his family, a new car. The dog saw frustration because wild things could so easily hide and escape his chase. The rabbit saw security. To the lark flying overhead, the field was home.

                While we may all be looking at the same thing, standing in the same story, the lenses we look through to interpret that story are vastly different for everyone. Join us today as we discuss the fourth step in reframing your story – understanding lenses, and being willing to swap them out every now and again.

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                Today we are on the 4^th podcast episode in a 5-part series: The 5 Steps to Reframing a Difficult Life Story. Welcome to Step #4 – A discussion about the lenses you look through and how they determine what you see, and considering the lenses others look through as well. You’ve heard of putting on rose colored glasses, because it changes the way you see things, makes the world look a little brighter. The way you see the world is certainly affected by different tinted glasses. Well, today we are discussing first of all, the fact that we metaphorically wear lenses and that these lenses form how we interpret what goes on around us, and second of all understanding that we can swap lenses if we need to. Choose a lens, any lens, the lens you look through determines what you see, how you interpret, and often whether you are happy with the story you are creating, or the story you have lived. Understand this concept and you begin to realize that your story CAN change.

                 

                Like magic, we conjure our stories from the ether of thought. The stories we tell ourselves about ourselves form from numerous things, one of which is a set of criteria and lenses that we have adopted, usually as fact – right and wrong– from our culture and family, from our religion and the things expected of us because of our gender, our economic status, our social standing, our race, education or political beliefs, sexual experience, sexual preference, and moral codes.  There are any number of these lenses that we each, individually look through when we engage in any situation.  Picture if you will a pair of glasses with maybe a dozen lenses stacked on top of one other for us to look through. Everyone has a pair of these glasses that they are wearing. These are the lenses through which we see right and wrong, through which we judge our own stories, through which we judge the stories of others. Everyone around us is also wearing a set of these thick glasses, only a different set, with different lenses.

                An example of a lens – Brock Dethier, in his book 21 Genres, points out that because of his age (older than draft age) and his education (University professor, so he has enough education to compare wars from history to current situations) BOTH OF THESE ARE LENSES – his education and his age, he is bound to think differently about war than perhaps an uneducated 19-year-old man.

                Lynn Langer Meeks and Carol Jewkes Austin, in their book, Literacy in the Secondary English Classroom, call these lenses the “Cultural Eye.”  These beliefs, or ways of seeing the world start solidifying themselves from the time we are children, learning and...]]>How to Reframe Your Difficult Stories: 5 Part Workshop Series: Step 4– Changing Lenses

                A farmer stood with his dog overlooking his fields. Behind them in the grasses peered a small brown rabbit, and above flew a lark. The farmer looked across the field and saw cows, milk, provisions for his family, a new car. The dog saw frustration because wild things could so easily hide and escape his chase. The rabbit saw security. To the lark flying overhead, the field was home.

                While we may all be looking at the same thing, standing in the same story, the lenses we look through to interpret that story are vastly different for everyone. Join us today as we discuss the fourth step in reframing your story – understanding lenses, and being willing to swap them out every now and again.

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                Today we are on the 4^th podcast episode in a 5-part series: The 5 Steps to Reframing a Difficult Life Story. Welcome to Step #4 – A discussion about the lenses you look through and how they determine what you see, and considering the lenses others look through as well. You’ve heard of putting on rose colored glasses, because it changes the way you see things, makes the world look a little brighter. The way you see the world is certainly affected by different tinted glasses. Well, today we are discussing first of all, the fact that we metaphorically wear lenses and that these lenses form how we interpret what goes on around us, and second of all understanding that we can swap lenses if we need to. Choose a lens, any lens, the lens you look through determines what you see, how you interpret, and often whether you are happy with the story you are creating, or the story you have lived. Understand this concept and you begin to realize that your story CAN change.

                 

                Like magic, we conjure our stories from the ether of thought. The stories we tell ourselves about ourselves form from numerous things, one of which is a set of criteria and lenses that we have adopted, usually as fact – right and wrong– from our culture and family, from our religion and the things expected of us because of our gender, our economic status, our social standing, our race, education or political beliefs, sexual experience, sexual preference, and moral codes.  There are any number of these lenses that we each, individually look through when we engage in any situation.  Picture if you will a pair of glasses with maybe a dozen lenses stacked on top of one other for us to look through. Everyone has a pair of these glasses that they are wearing. These are the lenses through which we see right and wrong, through which we judge our own stories, through which we judge the stories of others. Everyone around us is also wearing a set of these thick glasses, only a different set, with different lenses.

                An example of a lens – Brock Dethier, in his book 21 Genres, points out that because of his age (older than draft age) and his education (University professor, so he has enough education to compare wars from history to current situations) BOTH OF THESE ARE LENSES – his education and his age, he is bound to think differently about war than perhaps an uneducated 19-year-old man.

                Lynn Langer Meeks and Carol Jewkes Austin, in their book, Literacy in the Secondary English Classroom, call these lenses the “Cultural Eye.”  These beliefs, or ways of seeing the world start solidifying themselves from the time we are children, learning and interpreting our world. It’s important to realize that we wear these lenses and that everyone around us has on a different set of lenses. Next, it’s important to recognize that not only do we wear these lenses, but also how our lenses create our stories – the ones we tell to others and the ones we tell to ourselves. Because then we can start to recognize that there are perspectives beyond our own, and create possibility beyond one way of seeing things.

                Let me share an example of two cultural lenses. A friend sent me an article called  Two world views: romantic and classical. The article starts out with a description of what romanticism is – “a movement of art and ideas that began in Europe in the mid eighteenth century and has now taken over the world. It’s hard to go far on almost any issue without encountering a dominant Romantic position,” it starts out.

                I bring this up in conjunction with the cultural eye, because Romanticism and Classicism are schools of thought created by cultural lenses and adopted as ways of approaching life. The power of these approaches is hard to overestimate because they create the very basis for which we make our life decisions and thus create our stories.  Let me explain.

                “Romanticism,” it says, is at its core a willingness to trust in feelings and instinct as supreme guides to life – and a corresponding suspicion of reason and analysis.” It points out how we expect that in relation to love the romantics believe that “passionate emotions will reliably guide us to a partner who can provide us with 50 years or so of intimate happiness.”  This belief alone can influence life choices away from possibly suitable mates unless the passionate chemistry and euphoric infatuation is present. These are major life choices made not on reason but on the heart and the chemicals that cause the feelings of passion to flare. This belief changes life trajectories.

                As it applies to work, the romantic mindset is one that suggests that all people will feel a pull toward a specific and meaningful vocation, holding a passion for something they must follow. When I read this section it was almost a relief to accept the opposing and classical view that not all should look to their instincts to solve the problem of what one should be doing with their life on a productive basis, rather it accepts the understanding that all work will have moments of tedium and frustration, and that the idea of an “ideal” job is folly.  Like most things, I usually come down somewhere in the middle of these topics – I most certainly believe that some people are very much driven by a clear vision of what they want to do—they feel destiny tug and must follow, and many most certainly build their dream jobs through the sheer determination of their own vision and persistence. I’ve seen it happen, I’ve done it.  I personally know a great many coaches and people who believe in the romantic approach to the story of life. It’s often taught that we must follow our dreams, and shoot for the stars. Follow your heart is a common refrain. In fact, it’s become part of the American Dream. But, it must also be said that I know just as many who are desperately seeking to find that “passion” for a vocation, that intuition that will lead them to their greatness, that clarity of purpose toward the perfect job, because culturally this romantic approach to vocation is espoused so strongly that to not find it is, for many, to interpret failure.  People in their 40’s still not certain what they were supposed to be when they grew up. People desperately trying to figure out what their passion in life is, and having no idea, but feeling that they somehow missed the boat because they never felt completely driven toward a particular vision or vocation. Just this past week a woman in a Facebook group that I am a part of, was bemoaning the fact that she needed to take time off work to find her direction, to find her passion, and she just wasn’t sure she could find it.  The reason the classic train of thought felt liberating, was that it gave all those who have never felt a singled, focused, passionate longing toward a specific vocation a get-out-of romantic jail free card. Good news – not every life story need be crafted around the romantic idea of a foreordained purpose – that’s just one lens. If you’re not feeling it, the classic lens allows for great meaning and honor in all walks of life. Life, from a classic perspective isn’t about constant thrill and passion, but fulfillment in and an appreciation for the slow and messy process of life rather than the sudden impulses of emotion.

                Stories can be told from the romantic perspective – stories of intuition, of love solving all, but also it can create unreal hopes that blind us to the dangers of feeling that we must obey instincts in love, work, and life rather than considering such classic traditions as the idea of the intense frailties of our human nature, and that our emotions often overpower our better judgment. In love classicism councils “a gracious acceptance of the madness inside each partner. It knows that ecstasy cannot last, and that the basis of all good relationships must be tolerance and mutual sympathy.” Classicism regards domestic life and chores as deeply worthy of care and effort. It suggests that financial considerations in choosing a marriage partner are not unworthy and unromantic, but necessary consideration as it plays a role in the “good life.”

                The article is much more detailed and it’s fascinating to compare the two different life approaches. Your lenses will lead you toward one side or the other, or maybe you’ll be sitting somewhere in the middle with me. Depending upon your other lenses the breakout of how much romanticism and how much classicism you agree with is an individual creation.

                Our stories, the most powerful ones, are the ones we create in our own heads. Ryan Clarkin said, “The quality of your life is determined by the quality of the conversations going on in your own mind.” That is a powerful statement. The stories going on in our minds are stories based upon our cultural eye, based upon learned or adopted attitudes, like romanticism’s idea that we should  follow our instincts, or classicisms deep mistrust of instinct and the missteps of the human mind. What you believe gives you the framework for how you position your story, which often then creates a space of judgment about the success or failure of your story. Then that judgment gets replayed over and over in our minds.

                Let me share some short examples:

                If you have been raised in a culture where eating dogs is considered normal dinner fare, then your interpretation of a dog barbeque festival may not raise your eyebrows. On the other hand, if you are from a culture where dogs are considered beloved pets and family members then eating a dog might not only seem like vomit worthy discussion, but anyone who would eat a dog may be considered to be cruel and disgusting as you look through your own cultural lenses. If you come from a family where everyone went to an Ivy League school and only the highest levels of education will do, to choose a trade school may feel like a failure because of familial expectations, and your judgments of yourself and others will most likely be tainted by those lenses and expectations, when in reality the labels you place on such a situation can only make you feel inferior or superior if you assign them and buy into that value assignment.  If you come from a family where modesty is strictly adhered and taught as a must-do, then you are likely to have judgments about people or families who do not adopt your same dress code. These concepts get pulled into the stories we create about other people and into the stories we create about ourselves. Often providing labels of “good” or “bad,” “right” or “wrong,” but all are created due to the lenses we look through.

                I want to propose, as I have done before, that our stories are not fact, but a fluid interpretation based on fluid concepts that can be reframed. If you’ve often felt like a failure because you could not find a particular job that knocked your socks off, the romantic notions provide that you’ve missed something. The classic notion provides that you have not missed anything, on the contrary, if you have found meaning in honest work that has good days and bad days, that you’re pretty normal. I don’t provide this as an excuse for those who know they have a dream and are dancing around the fear of moving forward. I provide this concept for those who genuinely do not feel drawn to a passionate purpose in their choice of profession. If you need permission to be okay with that, Classicism gives it to you. Tell your tale from a classic perspective, because truly you are creating your own reality. If one lens makes you feel inadequate or shameful, there are other lenses through which to view your story so that you can see it in a healthy way.

                So, how does this help you in reframing your story? The fourth step in the process of reframing a story, after accepting your story, being able to tell it, and finding the meaning in the things you experienced (the first three steps in this process that we’ve discussed the past 3 weeks), is to start to take it apart with the realization that the power you have assigned to the events in your story is determined by your lenses.

                Here are a few questions to help you consider this idea:

                Look at your story – what lenses have you been looking through that have defined that part of your life story? Where did you get those lenses? Is there a possibility that the thing you are absolutely sure is fact, isn’t really fact if you shift the lens? How does your story change if you looked through someone else’s lens or lenses? How do the unfulfilled life expectations programmed into you by your culture, religion, gender, family, etc affect your current self perception? What would happen if the expectations didn’t exist? What would your life feel like without them? Would it feel better or worse? How would your self perception change? How would your life story change? Were the people involved in your story doing the best they could at the time? Considering their lenses, how might they have seen the situation? (that’s a hard one because we have no way of truly understanding another’s lenses.) If you had been in their shoes would you have behaved as they did? What do you feel for the other parties in your story – hate? Anger? Empathy? Nothing? Fear? Understanding? Sadness? Forgiveness?  Do those feelings serve you? Does feeling that way about them hurt them, or you?

                Go back and write down those questions and spend some time finding your answers.

                Let’s look at the breakdown of my lenses in my story. The lenses I wear include a staunch religious upbringing involving strong ethics, morals, and family values. As a member of the LDS church, family is of predominant import. We don’t marry until death do you part, we marry in a special ceremony that seals us to our spouse for all eternity. We believe in family, in morality, in love and service. With this lens there are a great many right and wrongs. My family lens is one that is strongly based in these same principals. My grandparents stayed married, my parents stayed married, most of my siblings, cousins and aunts and uncles are still with their original spouses. (I’m directly addressing these lenses as they have to do with my issues of my divorces – of course there are other aspects of all of these lenses).  So, with these two lenses, and living in a community in which these same values are espoused, the decision for my first divorce was gigantic. The decision for my second divorce was mortifying. The dissolution of my third marriage filled me with almost a hands-in-the-air holy-shit there is no way to recover from the shame. Everyone will think I am so broken.

                Now, we’ve been discussing how we assign value to our life stories according to our lenses. What at first felt like shame and failure I was sure never to recover from, when I stopped  and took time to consider the perspective or lens shift that allows for growth and learning through these experiences, rather than a fear of being seen as a failure, fear of judgment and disgrace in my own culture, I removed my own feelings of victimhood, shame and fear of what others think of me ( I still struggle with that one occasionally, if I’m completely honest).  I have no control of the lenses of others, but I do have the ability to realize that while my life trajectory was not ideal in my culture, it did not and does not have anything to do with my self-worth. I fully realize that this was my story, my issue and we all have our own stories around our stories, but it is these that we need to make peace with. Because they are our own stories around the events in our lives, we are the creators, and so we can recreate the ones that make us feel small, fearful, ashamed, or unhappy.

                I knew the inside scoop about what had happened in my marriages. I knew I had stood up against abuse, that I had stood back up after abandonment, that I had made brave choices not to stay in situations that didn’t make me happy. I knew I had fought hard to work out every relationship, that I had tried to love well. The reality of my story was one of strength and courage. It was one of trying hard, of making mistakes sometime, but always of doing my best with whatever I was dealing with at the time. None of those things are shameful – they are things to be celebrated. And I also got to accept the mistakes I made as learning experiences.  I figured out that the feelings of shame I was feeling came from cultural, religious and familial expectation within those realms, but I was creating a story of  self consciousness over my life trajectory which created massive self doubt.

                Here’s the key, because I know these lenses are mine due to nurture, not fact, there is a fluidity to interpretation that allows for me to take the lenses off for a moment and allow myself to see my story with less judgment. Now, let me be clear, there were not people in my culture or religion or family telling me I was a loser. It was my own self consciousness and the stories of failure and fear of judgment I created within my own mind. But this is where shame resides – in our own minds.

                Another example, which I shared in the first step of this workshop series, is the different lenses between the Native Americans and those who were moving in to the new land conquering and developing it. The differences in attitudes toward nature between Native Americans and the settlers were opposites. While one culture held great reverence for the land and the circle of life involved in the natural system, the other considered a good life to be one of taming the land, expanding and clearing the land, building edifices to call sacred, rather than finding the sacred in the mountain or the wildlife. Depending upon which culture you were born in, a “good life” meant something very different.  Two different sets of cultural lenses defined a completely different way of approaching a situation. Each felt strongly that their way was correct. What if you had been a Native American who favored expansion and conquering? You may have been exiled from your tribe. But did your approach diminish your self worth? Not to the settlers and expantionists. What if you had arrived on a ship from England and aligned more strongly with the ways of the Native Americans and their deep respect for the land, and the needless slaughtering of millions of bison turned your stomach. Did that make you a bad person? Not to the Native Americans. It’s all a matter of perspective and lenses.

                This process of considering, honestly, the lenses you wear, allowing for the lenses the others in your story may]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1877Wed, 23 Aug 2017 09:00:51 -070030:41falsefullHow to Reframe Your Difficult Stories: 5 Part Workshop Series: Step 4– Changing Lenses A farmer stood with his dog overlooking his fields. Behind them in the grasses peered a small brown rabbit, and above flew a lark. The farmer looked across the field and saw cows, milk, provisions for his family, a new car. The…Lori LeeEpisode 48 How to Re-frame Your Difficult Stories: Step 3 (Workshop 5-part Series)How to Reframe Your Difficult Stories: 5 Part Workshop Series: Step 3– Finding the Meaning or Purpose Behind an Experience

                When Becky Andrews  (episode 22) found out that she had a degenerative eye disease that would cause her to go blind, I’m sure she wondered, “Why me?.” When my son was diagnosed with Leukemia and had to return from his mission where he was teaching others about Christ’s love for them and serving them, a journey he had worked, waited, and saved money for, I wondered, “Why him? When Rusty Lindquist (episode 21) was living with his mother in a trailer, in the woods, with no electricity or running water as a child because she had to hide him from a father who was trying to sacrifice Rusty, like Abraham was asked to sacrifice Isaac, in order to prove to God that he was to be the next prophet;  then one day his mother didn’t come back from work and he sat there all alone, day after day wondering what happened to her…these are not the moments when we see the meaning. These are the moments when the tornado hits and the pain rises and the rubber meets the road. But later there is a space where we must find the purpose, the meaning behind the experience in order to make peace with our path. Pain without purpose is just pain. Join us today for an in depth look at the third step of reframing our stories – Finding the meaning and purpose behind an experience.

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                A crucial step in being able to find peace in our most painful stories is the step of finding some purpose for them, some meaning, something that we can take away from the darkness, sacrifice, or pain that paved the path we walked.

                The Buddha taught that all life is suffering, that suffering comes from holding on to selfish desires, and that selfish desires can be overcome. The Christian dogma indicates that God uses our suffering to refine and teach us. If you Google suffering you will find that almost all results lead you to some religious reference, which to me indicates that when it comes to our suffering we turn outside ourselves to find answers. We want help. We want to find a peace in the storm, which is often what we turn to religion for.  This is not uncommon, in fact, it’s completely common, hence the Google search results. When we go through the chapters of our stories where we battle the dragons, the antagonists, the sorrows and disappointments we desperately want to believe that there can be something good to come from it. We hope against hope looking for answers and asking the questions…why?

                Joan Borysenko said, “We cannot wish old feelings away nor do spiritual exercises for overcoming them until we have woven a healing story that transforms our previous life’s experience and gives meaning to whatever pain we have endured.”

                Philip Zimbardo, one of the most respected psychologists of the twentieth century, and past president of the American Psychological Association taught at Yale and Stanford and authored over 50 books. He was born in 1934. When he was 5 years old he got whopping cough and pneumonia. Steve Kotler, in his book The Rise of Superman, retells Zimbardo’s story pointing out that “In those days before antibiotics 63 percent of all children with whooping cough or double pneumonia did not recover. A friend Zimbardo made, as a little boy in the hospital, died there, next to him, and Zimbardo found that the only way to fight off the depression and fear of the situation was to use his imagination – he just kept imagining better possible...]]>How to Reframe Your Difficult Stories: 5 Part Workshop Series: Step 3– Finding the Meaning or Purpose Behind an Experience

                When Becky Andrews  (episode 22) found out that she had a degenerative eye disease that would cause her to go blind, I’m sure she wondered, “Why me?.” When my son was diagnosed with Leukemia and had to return from his mission where he was teaching others about Christ’s love for them and serving them, a journey he had worked, waited, and saved money for, I wondered, “Why him? When Rusty Lindquist (episode 21) was living with his mother in a trailer, in the woods, with no electricity or running water as a child because she had to hide him from a father who was trying to sacrifice Rusty, like Abraham was asked to sacrifice Isaac, in order to prove to God that he was to be the next prophet;  then one day his mother didn’t come back from work and he sat there all alone, day after day wondering what happened to her…these are not the moments when we see the meaning. These are the moments when the tornado hits and the pain rises and the rubber meets the road. But later there is a space where we must find the purpose, the meaning behind the experience in order to make peace with our path. Pain without purpose is just pain. Join us today for an in depth look at the third step of reframing our stories – Finding the meaning and purpose behind an experience.

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                A crucial step in being able to find peace in our most painful stories is the step of finding some purpose for them, some meaning, something that we can take away from the darkness, sacrifice, or pain that paved the path we walked.

                The Buddha taught that all life is suffering, that suffering comes from holding on to selfish desires, and that selfish desires can be overcome. The Christian dogma indicates that God uses our suffering to refine and teach us. If you Google suffering you will find that almost all results lead you to some religious reference, which to me indicates that when it comes to our suffering we turn outside ourselves to find answers. We want help. We want to find a peace in the storm, which is often what we turn to religion for.  This is not uncommon, in fact, it’s completely common, hence the Google search results. When we go through the chapters of our stories where we battle the dragons, the antagonists, the sorrows and disappointments we desperately want to believe that there can be something good to come from it. We hope against hope looking for answers and asking the questions…why?

                Joan Borysenko said, “We cannot wish old feelings away nor do spiritual exercises for overcoming them until we have woven a healing story that transforms our previous life’s experience and gives meaning to whatever pain we have endured.”

                Philip Zimbardo, one of the most respected psychologists of the twentieth century, and past president of the American Psychological Association taught at Yale and Stanford and authored over 50 books. He was born in 1934. When he was 5 years old he got whopping cough and pneumonia. Steve Kotler, in his book The Rise of Superman, retells Zimbardo’s story pointing out that “In those days before antibiotics 63 percent of all children with whooping cough or double pneumonia did not recover. A friend Zimbardo made, as a little boy in the hospital, died there, next to him, and Zimbardo found that the only way to fight off the depression and fear of the situation was to use his imagination – he just kept imagining better possible futures. Today we call this visualizing – visualizing the outcomes we want. Creating our desires, first in our minds. Eventually, Zimbardo recovered and was released, and he was shocked to realize, as he looked back and viewed his time in the hospital, that it had turned out to be a positive experience because he learned self-reliance, he learned to create a perspective in difficult times that would benefit him. Though it was a difficult, terrifying, and painful time in his life, he had gained something from the experience. Something very, very important that would affect the rest of his life.

                This is an example of the ever important step on your way to reframing, of finding the blessing, the takeaway, the lesson from the tough experiences of life. It is also an example of choosing to actively direct perspective instead of letting raw emotion and reaction to the situation at hand determine your attitude.

                Viktor Frankl, a Jewish Psychologist who was interred in a concentration camp and survived, shares an experience where a client came into his office distraught because his wife had died and he was lonely and lost without her. Through Viktor’s deep understanding of suffering, he quietly asked the man a question – what would have happened if your wife had passed before you? “Oh,” said the man, “that would have been horrible. She could never have handled it.”

                “Well,” said Viktor, “you can be grateful that you have been able to spare her that difficulty and suffering, by being the one to stay behind.” Though the man had come in for an entire session or more to find some relief from his deep suffering, this one question, this one answer was all he needed to be able to move forward. He had found the purpose in his suffering – the opportunity to walk this path so his wife did not need to.  He stood up, walked out of Viktor’s office, and Viktor never saw him again.

                One of the reasons this is so important is that if we can change the negative stories we believe about ourselves, it then affects our interpretation of ourselves and our lives, and with that change behavior changes. Weights lift, outcomes shift. Our hard stories become not just about pain, but also about growth and learning or whatever the purpose or meaning turns out to be. We are talking about acceptance, freedom, and an expanded view of events and outcomes.

                Here are a couple questions to start with:  1. What did you learn from your difficult experience (the story you are reframing)?  2. What positive things came about because of the experience? 3. Did you gain an understanding of things you had previously not understood? 4. Did this experience allow you to get rid of a person, thing, idea that no longer served you? 5. What meaning or purpose starts to become clear? 6. What positive piece of gold can you pull from the dross?

                In his Ted Talk, “How the worst moments in our lives make us who we are,” Andrew Solomon shared an experience of a woman who was thrown in prison over a political issue in Burma.

                Listen to the episode to hear the excerpt from this TED talk.

                Later in his talk he made a profound statement, “If you banish the dragons, you banish the heroes.”

                When we do this step of the reframing process we are not denying the reality of events, rather, we are looking for the silver lining. You are strong, you are resilient, you know yourself and your heart – admitting that you learned something, that you gained something, is not about saying that it’s okay that the event happened, it is simply taking up your power to say, “I WILL NOT let this keep me down! I WILL find every last takeaway because I’m worth it and I want to be free in my own heart to accept my story with all its dents and scratches. There is meaning in MY story.” In August of 2016 my son was out serving an LDS Christian mission serving others, teaching about Christ, and basically out to make the world a better place. He’s 20 years old and he’s saved his money since he was little so that he could afford to do this when he graduated from high school. So here he is, out in the world, thousands of miles away from home in Utah, and he’s working with Spanish speaking people in the Philadelphia, New Jersey area when he gets diagnosed with Leukemia. For seven months he had worked 12-14 hours a day teaching and serving, thinking he was incredibly tired because the work was hard. He had no idea that his white blood cells had become mutated so thoroughly that his bone marrow was so thick it could not be pulled from his bones, and his spleen, taking over the work of trying to create the blood cells, had become so large it transformed from this small organ that can usually not be felt from the outside of your body to one that was so distended that it took up the side and front of his abdomen giving him the look of a being 4-5 months pregnant (which of course varied depending

                In August of 2016 my son was out serving an LDS Christian mission serving others, teaching about Christ, and basically out to make the world a better place. He’s 20 years old and he’s saved his money since he was little so that he could afford to do this when he graduated from high school. So here he is, out in the world, thousands of miles away from home in Utah, and he’s working with Spanish speaking people in the Philadelphia, New Jersey area when he gets diagnosed with Leukemia. For seven months he had worked 12-14 hours a day teaching and serving, thinking he was incredibly tired because the work was hard. He had no idea that his white blood cells had become mutated so thoroughly that his bone marrow was so thick it could not be pulled from his bones, and his spleen, taking over the work of trying to create the blood cells, had become so large it transformed from this small organ that can usually not be felt from the outside of your body, to one that was so distended that it took up the side and front of his abdomen giving him the look of a being 4-5 months pregnant (which of course varied depending upon the body – but it pretty big). This distention is what tipped him off that he should check in with the doctor, and he was sent home the next day with a leukemia diagnosis.

                He had worked for many years for this goal – to serve a mission. He was out serving people, teaching them about Christ, he was creating good and sharing love. Why would God do this to him? Amidst great disappointment at not being able to serve, he began treatment at one of the best cancer treatment centers in the country. When he felt well enough that he could get out of bed and function in a relatively normal manner, he took another angle with his story – he began serving in the temple, a place of worship important to him and his spiritual journey. He worked six hour shifts twice a week and then went through to do his own sessions on other days. What it looked like to me was that he had transitioned his mission service into the temple itself. While the prayers, fasting, treatments, bone marrow biopsies, weekly blood draws, sleepless nights and his own independent spiritual journey unfolded, his story was developing into something beyond what he could see. His faith was tested, his patience was tried, his body was pushed into severely difficult spaces, but his example shone like a bright star for many lives who watched and were inspired. Stories started rolling in from people who had watched him and been inspired to live better and try harder. His work in the temple was deeply satisfying and when eight months had passed and his response to treatment went from almost total mutation to .3% mutation, he went back out into the mission field, filled with joy and utter excitement to return.

                While he was not allowed to return to Philadelphia, he was allowed to move an hour away from home in order that he be in close proximity to the Huntsman Cancer Center. This less adventurous option was at first deeply disappointing for he’d grown to love the people and the area in Philadelphia, but in the end, as we looked at his story to find the meaning in what originally felt so unfair, we found beautiful purpose.  We recognized that instead of serving in one area he was actually able to serve in 3: Philly, the temple, and Orem. We recognized the lives he had touched through his experience and example, and we, his family, gained from his light and example as he walked his path with strength and faith. And I have no doubt that there is more meaning to be uncovered in the story that at first seemed so tragic. We don’t know all the people he will meet and impact in his new area. We don’t know what other gems of meaning may yet be found in this side road that turned out to be part of the journey. It is these pieces of meaning and purpose that clarify the stories of our lives.

                Brene Brown said, “Nothing is wasted. It’s all part of the process.”

                And we get to embrace this idea and do the work to spin the straw into gold.  Rumplestilskin has nothing over a person who becomes skilled in recognizing, finding, or creating purpose in the journey.

                Have fun out there creating your big, bold, wonderful story! And pass this podcast series along to someone today who might find great relief in learning how to reframe their stories. Do a little good in the world and share the love. Also, go to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and sign up for the free mini-ebook on the five steps for reframing the parts of your story that feel broken. It can serve as a notes on the process we are going through in this series. See you next week for Step 4 in this 5 step process. Lata’ fellow story creators.

                 

                 

                 

                 

                 

                ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1867Wed, 16 Aug 2017 09:00:02 -070015:14falsefullA crucial step in being able to find peace in our most painful stories is the step of finding some purpose for them, some meaning, something that we can take away from the darkness, sacrifice, or pain that paved the path we walked. Tune in this week for Step 3 in the 5 Steps to Reframing your Story.Lori LeeEpisode 47 How to Re-frame Your Difficult Stories: Step 2 (Workshop 5-Part Series)How to Reframe Your Difficult Stories 5-Part Workshop Series: Step 2 – Tell Your Stories

                Those stories hidden in the dark of night, kept under cover, the lid closely guarded and locked, cannot breathe or break free from shame, guilt or sadness that are a part of their very nature. Until the lid is opened, until the light can shine down upon the dark shadows, to chase them out and loosen the ties that hold the story closed, there will be no healing. Join us today for Step 2 of the 5 part reframing process. Tell Your Stories!

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                So, here we are in week two of our five-week series. I hope your work with the acceptance of your stories has been productive this past week. Moving onto step two this week, we come to the point of TELLING OUR STORY.  It’s time to say it out loud. To put it into words. Before some of you start hyperventilating with the idea of this type of exposure and vulnerability, this does not mean you should run out and post your most shame filled or difficult stories on Facebook, or announcing them in the city square. It means coming to a point of claiming them, where you can put into words your stories, in a safe space. A space where you are able to put words to even your deeply disturbing stories that have remained silent, in one way or another.

                Becky Andrews, a therapist at Resilience Inc, a guest we’ve had speak on the podcast, episode 022, explained to me, telling our stories is invaluable, we must talk and share our stories, she said. We know that studies indicate that talk therapy – thus sharing our stories, actually lessen the intensity and stress in our brain.

                So, I asked a woman who had done the Next Level emotional intelligence leadership workshop about her experiences in telling her stories.

                Jamie said, “There was one experience in particular where I had already had my turn to speak, but I had a very clear realization while listening to the rest of my group take their turn.  I knew without a doubt that I needed to say it out loud to my group.  I was able to share and while sharing, the pain and heartache that had started with one experience so many years ago, left me.  It was so freeing.  I obviously still have the memory, but it does not have the same effect or hold over me that it used to.  The other thing about this experience that was interesting was that there were so many other experiences in my life where other people treated me in a similar way as the person did in this initial experience. These experiences just piled up on each other over the years leaving me feeling unimportant and unloved.  By sharing this initial experience, the pain from these other events in my life left as well.  It was amazing! It was huge for me.”

                She went on, “Another experience was an exercise where you were forced to just keep talking while you really got to the bottom of things.  This gave me the opportunity to finally say out loud how I feel about my mothering.  It has been tough dealing with my son’s Aspergers, ADHD, and mood disorder.  I experienced shame and heartache over how I had handled different situations in weakness, and heartache over the situation as a whole.  Saying it out loud to a male that was there representing my son was cleansing. Saying it out loud is a necessary step to healing and moving on,” she finished.

                Often times the thing we will gain from telling our story, from putting it into words, is not something we will fully understand until it is done. Perhaps it is like Jamie,]]>How to Reframe Your Difficult Stories 5-Part Workshop Series: Step 2 – Tell Your Stories

                Those stories hidden in the dark of night, kept under cover, the lid closely guarded and locked, cannot breathe or break free from shame, guilt or sadness that are a part of their very nature. Until the lid is opened, until the light can shine down upon the dark shadows, to chase them out and loosen the ties that hold the story closed, there will be no healing. Join us today for Step 2 of the 5 part reframing process. Tell Your Stories!

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                So, here we are in week two of our five-week series. I hope your work with the acceptance of your stories has been productive this past week. Moving onto step two this week, we come to the point of TELLING OUR STORY.  It’s time to say it out loud. To put it into words. Before some of you start hyperventilating with the idea of this type of exposure and vulnerability, this does not mean you should run out and post your most shame filled or difficult stories on Facebook, or announcing them in the city square. It means coming to a point of claiming them, where you can put into words your stories, in a safe space. A space where you are able to put words to even your deeply disturbing stories that have remained silent, in one way or another.

                Becky Andrews, a therapist at Resilience Inc, a guest we’ve had speak on the podcast, episode 022, explained to me, telling our stories is invaluable, we must talk and share our stories, she said. We know that studies indicate that talk therapy – thus sharing our stories, actually lessen the intensity and stress in our brain.

                So, I asked a woman who had done the Next Level emotional intelligence leadership workshop about her experiences in telling her stories.

                Jamie said, “There was one experience in particular where I had already had my turn to speak, but I had a very clear realization while listening to the rest of my group take their turn.  I knew without a doubt that I needed to say it out loud to my group.  I was able to share and while sharing, the pain and heartache that had started with one experience so many years ago, left me.  It was so freeing.  I obviously still have the memory, but it does not have the same effect or hold over me that it used to.  The other thing about this experience that was interesting was that there were so many other experiences in my life where other people treated me in a similar way as the person did in this initial experience. These experiences just piled up on each other over the years leaving me feeling unimportant and unloved.  By sharing this initial experience, the pain from these other events in my life left as well.  It was amazing! It was huge for me.”

                She went on, “Another experience was an exercise where you were forced to just keep talking while you really got to the bottom of things.  This gave me the opportunity to finally say out loud how I feel about my mothering.  It has been tough dealing with my son’s Aspergers, ADHD, and mood disorder.  I experienced shame and heartache over how I had handled different situations in weakness, and heartache over the situation as a whole.  Saying it out loud to a male that was there representing my son was cleansing. Saying it out loud is a necessary step to healing and moving on,” she finished.

                Often times the thing we will gain from telling our story, from putting it into words, is not something we will fully understand until it is done. Perhaps it is like Jamie, where saying it out loud, giving it voice releases all the stories tied to it. Perhaps it is her experience of putting into words, in a mad unorganized rush, her story and guilty feelings about dealing with her son’s difficulties that actually give the story form and increased understanding. But sometimes it’s just the bravery of claiming it that sets you free to accept it, to accept yourself and your deeply personal identity that is foundationally built upon our stories. Sometimes in the telling you find others with similar stories and you are able to find support and community.

                You’ll notice in the examples I shared earlier that there were others listening or prodding, or bearing witness to the stories being told. I have found that reframing a story is most often NOT a one-person job. We are so entrenched in our stories that often the view of an outsider is what gives us another angle to consider. I did not reframe my stories without help. Becky Andrews, as a therapist, helps clients get perspective on their life stories all the time. Sometimes it is the perspective brought by another that serves as a key that unlocks the stuck story, or it is just the words, open to the light, that allows release. There is no question that claiming, accepting, and reframing our stories is a process, but this process cannot be done with stories that are buried and held hostage in our own fear.

                Sharing our human experiences, has always, throughout all time, been a way of connecting. It is not new to share our stories, but sometimes it is extremely uncomfortable or painful, especially when shame or guilt is involved.

                Lisaa Rankin, MD, in Psychology today, wrote an article called The Healing Power of Telling Your Story.  She says, “When we tell our stories and others bear witness, the notion that we are disconnected beings suffering alone dissolves under the weight of evidence that this whole concept is merely an illusion and that millions of others are suffering just like us. The minute you discover that someone else is suffering just like you—or even better, that they’re celebrating their wholeness just like you—that sense of disconnection eases and you start to glimpse the truth—that we are beings of vibrating energy, connected on the energy internet through processes like quantum entanglement, with overlapping consciousness that connects us to a divine Source and to the Inner Pilot Light of every being on this planet.”

                She goes on to comment on the Power of Vulnerability. “In order to benefit fully from the healing medicine of telling your story, you must resist holding anything back. You must strip off your masks, be unapologetically you, ditch worrying about what “everybody” is going to think and let your glorious freak flag fly. Otherwise, your story becomes a watered down, milk toast version of who you are.”

                “Why?” she asks, “because telling your story—while being witnessed with loving attention by others who care—may be the most powerful medicine on earth. Each of us is a constantly unfolding narrative, a hero in a novel no one else can write. And yet so many of us leave our stories untold, our songs unsung—and when this happens, we wind up feeling lonely, listless, out of touch with our life’s purpose, plagued with a chronic sense that something is out of alignment. We may even wind up feeling unworthy, unloved, or sick.”

                Find a safe place. Put words to the stories that are hard for you, the ones that have you listening to this podcast because you want the reframe. The one you don’t want to tell most of all. These are the ones that need to be told so that you can find support, freedom from shame, acceptance. Pull them out from under your bed, open the door and let the light in. Be brave enough to claim your own stories. There is a deep liberation and release from the chains we let bind us in our hidden stories when we say them out loud and claim the story only we know how to tell. These stories don’t define us, they need not hold us hostage.

                In Step #3 we take the next crucially important step of finding the meaning and purpose behind the experience. Join me next Wednesday for Step #3 – maybe the most satisfying of all five steps.

                Have fun out there creating your big, bold, wonderful story! And pass this podcast series along to someone today who might find great relief in learning how to reframe their stories. Do a little good in the world and share the love. Also, go to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and sign up for the free mini-ebook on the five steps for reframing the parts of your story that feel broken. It can serve as a notes on the process we are going through in this series. Lata’

                 

                 

                 

                 

                ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1852Wed, 09 Aug 2017 09:00:08 -070010:45falsefullThis week's episode is part 2 in a 5-week series on how to reframe your difficult stories so you can live with more freedom and joy. Those stories hidden in the dark of night, kept under cover, the lid closely guarded and locked, cannot breathe or break free from shame, guilt or sadness that are a part of their very nature. Until the lid is opened, until the light can shine down upon the dark shadows, to chase them out and loosen the ties that hold the story closed, there will be no healing. Join us today for Step 2 of the 5 part reframing process: Tell Your Stories!Lori LeeEpisode 46 How to Re-frame Your Difficult Stories: Step 1 (Workshop 5-Part Series)REFRAME YOUR DIFFICULT STORIES – 5-Part Workshop Series

                Do you want to be free of the stories in your life that make you feel small or that you find shame or guilt around? These stories often affect our self-perception and thus our interpreted self-worth. This workshop is to help you reframe and resee your life in healthier ways.

                Workshop Step #1 – Accept It

                Debbie Ford said, “The greatest act of courage is to be and own all that you are. Without apology, without excuses, and without one’s masks to cover the truth of who you really are.”

                Stay with us today as we launch into the 5-week Series outlining the 5 steps to reframing your story. Today we will discuss the first of the five steps that take you through the process of reframing your stories for a new space of freedom, peace and a new appreciation and love for your own story. This process is not always easy. In fact, if you are truly doing it correctly it could prove to be a painful process, but make no mistake, it is worth every brave step to dig deep and do the work to love your story, which leads to a fuller acceptance and love of yourself.  And what is more important than that foundation?

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                As I was finishing up my masters degree and my research on the personal narrative, and considering where I wanted to go with my doctorate work, I found that I wanted to further my work with personal narrative in an effort to make sense of my own life story, for which I did not feel complete comfort. There were spaces of shame, of disappointment and of failure that I wore on my back, everyday.

                I designed a research plan before I was even finished with my MS work and jumped into the research by interviewing women to discern if their life stories had turned out as THEY expected. It turned out that out of the 20 women who agreed to be part of the research project, only one of them said her life had turned out as planned. These women were diverse. They had different belief systems, they came from different parts of the country, they were different ages, had different careers, different marital statuses, etc.  As I became privy to their stories I felt less alone, but I also realized that there was powerful work to be done in how we view our life experiences.  After graduating with my MS degree I went into a space of consideration – where would I go from here? Would I pursue my Ph.D. and the Love Your Story research? Would I start consulting with businesses on how to use story? What would I do next? As fate would have it, I began an emotional intelligence leadership conference that lasted the entire next year as I went through one program after another. At each step, I learned more about the stories we tell ourselves, about how to reframe, about how to let go, and about how to live big. I worked with personal coaches and I eventually coached others. It became clear that what I wanted to do with my writing, my research, and my tools and understanding of story was to share them and empower as many people as were ready to stand up and love their story. People, who like me, were ready to embrace the tools and take the action for coming to a place of increased peace with their own powerful, disjointed tales.

                Brene Brown said, in her book Rising Strong, “So much of what we hear today about courage is inflated and empty rhetoric that camouflages personal fears about one’s likability, ratings, and ability to maintain a level of comfort and status. We need more people who are willing to...]]>REFRAME YOUR DIFFICULT STORIES – 5-Part Workshop Series

                Do you want to be free of the stories in your life that make you feel small or that you find shame or guilt around? These stories often affect our self-perception and thus our interpreted self-worth. This workshop is to help you reframe and resee your life in healthier ways.

                Workshop Step #1 – Accept It

                Debbie Ford said, “The greatest act of courage is to be and own all that you are. Without apology, without excuses, and without one’s masks to cover the truth of who you really are.”

                Stay with us today as we launch into the 5-week Series outlining the 5 steps to reframing your story. Today we will discuss the first of the five steps that take you through the process of reframing your stories for a new space of freedom, peace and a new appreciation and love for your own story. This process is not always easy. In fact, if you are truly doing it correctly it could prove to be a painful process, but make no mistake, it is worth every brave step to dig deep and do the work to love your story, which leads to a fuller acceptance and love of yourself.  And what is more important than that foundation?

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                As I was finishing up my masters degree and my research on the personal narrative, and considering where I wanted to go with my doctorate work, I found that I wanted to further my work with personal narrative in an effort to make sense of my own life story, for which I did not feel complete comfort. There were spaces of shame, of disappointment and of failure that I wore on my back, everyday.

                I designed a research plan before I was even finished with my MS work and jumped into the research by interviewing women to discern if their life stories had turned out as THEY expected. It turned out that out of the 20 women who agreed to be part of the research project, only one of them said her life had turned out as planned. These women were diverse. They had different belief systems, they came from different parts of the country, they were different ages, had different careers, different marital statuses, etc.  As I became privy to their stories I felt less alone, but I also realized that there was powerful work to be done in how we view our life experiences.  After graduating with my MS degree I went into a space of consideration – where would I go from here? Would I pursue my Ph.D. and the Love Your Story research? Would I start consulting with businesses on how to use story? What would I do next? As fate would have it, I began an emotional intelligence leadership conference that lasted the entire next year as I went through one program after another. At each step, I learned more about the stories we tell ourselves, about how to reframe, about how to let go, and about how to live big. I worked with personal coaches and I eventually coached others. It became clear that what I wanted to do with my writing, my research, and my tools and understanding of story was to share them and empower as many people as were ready to stand up and love their story. People, who like me, were ready to embrace the tools and take the action for coming to a place of increased peace with their own powerful, disjointed tales.

                Brene Brown said, in her book Rising Strong, “So much of what we hear today about courage is inflated and empty rhetoric that camouflages personal fears about one’s likability, ratings, and ability to maintain a level of comfort and status. We need more people who are willing to demonstrate what it looks like to risk and endure failure, disappointment, and regret – people willing to feel their own hurt instead of working it out on other people, people willing to own their stories, live their values, and keep showing up.”

                This 5-step workshop is for those people who are “willing to feel their own hurt instead of working it out on other people.”  It is specifically for “people who are willing to own their stories, live their values, and keep showing up.”

                The first step in the process of reframing your story so you can love it is to ACCEPT IT.

                I want to make four points about this, the first is that most life stories don’t turn out as expected. When we are children and we picture our lives and set our dreams, we don’t envision the tests, the trials, the losses. We picture scenes that are laid out for us in childhood stories and Disney videos, we see the unfolding of cultural iconic stories – finding true love, family, safety, prosperity.  You are not alone, indeed you are in a world full of people who have lives that look nothing like they expected. As affirmed by my research mentioned earlier. 19 out of 20 people did not have their lives turn out as they thought they would. While this is just one study, and a small one at that, in all my informal inquiries it’s far a few who claim a life resembling their youthful expectations. What needs to be understood is that it’s okay, in fact, it’s normal.

                Which brings me to my second point: Life is Messy and that’s okay. In episode 8 we discuss this very topic – for the entire podcast. I go into detail with examples of some of our greatest icons and revered figures like Christ, Oprah, Abraham Lincoln and we look closely at the messiness of their lives. The messiness is part and parcel of this whole thing called life. There is real importance in embracing the mess and letting it be what it is, because in the mess is the beauty.

                Scott Peck said, in The Road Less Traveled,

                “Problems call forth our courage and our wisdom; indeed they create our courage and our wisdom. It is only because of problems that we grow mentally and spiritually.”

                Did you hear that? Mess is part of Creation.  Embrace it. Love your mess. Love your story! It’s the only one you have. And, let’s not forget the whole point of this podcast…the idea is that we get to decide how we interpret, use, and accept our own messy stories. It’s okay that it’s messy, in fact, you want it to be messy because that’s where you find the courage, wisdom, and strength. Accept it with a gentleness for yourself and give yourself the basic dignity you deserve.

                My third point is very important, but one most people don’t stop to think about.  It is that the parameters for a good life are defined by cultures, religions, and families. What a “good life” means in one culture or religion may differ quite extremely from what another deems a “good life.” This becomes important to realize because “good” becomes a fluid concept created by a set of beliefs taught to us as fact from the time we were small. It is subjective. An example of this can be seen in the differences in attitudes toward nature between Native Americans and the settlers who were bent on expansion. While one culture held great reverence for the land and the circle of life involved in the natural system, the other considered a good life to be one of taming the land, expanding and clearing the land, building edifices to call sacred, rather than finding the sacred in the mountain or the wildlife. Depending on which culture you were born in, a “good life” meant something very different. While you may have your opinion as to which is accurate, the point is that it is subjective. European cultures are much more open about nudity than American culture. Middle Eastern cultures control their women with a heavier hand than would be accepted in Western cultures. In each of these places, what defines a “good life” becomes a little something different.

                With this understanding we realize that when you are looking at your life, if being acceptable or “good” is part of the disconnect you have with your story, then it’s important to realize from a big picture perspective that while in your neighborhood, in your family, in your sphere, your stories may not fit all the parameters of a “good life,” it does not mean that there is only one way to create a good life. Maybe your family and religion are very set against divorce at all costs, and when you left the man who was abusing you, you got black listed. There are other spaces where leaving an abusive spouse is perfectly acceptable and supported. It does not make you “bad.”  While in some spheres being subject to the control of your husband is considered the only way to be respected in the community, in other spaces in the world it would be considered a ridiculous expectation bordering on a loss of human rights. You get the idea. Let me say it this way, there are 4000 ways (arbitrary number) to create a “good life.”  There is not just one way to do it.”  A good life can be one that is lived to the best of your ability at each turn. One where you learn, grow, and stand back up and keep on fighting the fight. In earlier episodes, we spoke with a man, Adam Chase, in episode 32, who has created a life where he and his wife live in different states. Not because they don’t love each other, in fact, they newly wed, but because they chose to create a life that works for them and looks a little different, and that’s okay. In episode 23 with Marvin Cassler, we meet a man who lives in a storage shed so he can save his money for travel in the summer when he’s not at work. There are so many ways to build a good life, and if you need more models, listen to the stories of other people around the world. Listen and learn.

                Which brings me to my fourth point, which is modeling. Not too many years ago, ever aware of the intricate mental pathways and musings crowding around in my head, I realized that when a situation came up in my life that I had no precedent for handing I would scan for models. If I couldn’t find a model from how I was raised or a personal experience I had had, my brain would turn to movies. Now, right off the bat, we can see all sorts of problems with this go-to, but I suspect we all do it. If I needed to figure out how to handle an interaction with my teen, (and I have a different type of relationship with my kids than my parents had with me, so I often don’t have a model for how to handle it), then I’d think about how some character in a TV show or movie handled a similar situation. Since I’m fully aware of how unrealistic most TV and movies actually are, and how they often propagate a lack of morals that I don’t agree with, you can see how problematic this becomes. And yet, if I have no other model to look to, how do I figure out what to do? Heaven forbid we forge our own way forward using our own judgment.

                Occasionally, when I don’t have a model, I get creative and choose a route of my own making, but the fascinating idea is how the human mind always looks to models to determine how to move forward. This is one of the functions of story. Culturally stories are shared to show and teach others how things can be done. This is a universal tool across the world in all cultures. The “Chicken Soup for the Soul” series was a set of true stories captured to show people overcoming and achieving positive results. Models that lifted and made people feel good. Stories used in church settings are to provide models for what it looks like to be charitable, to forgive, to be kind. Family histories can model for us how our ancestors did things. In the interview with Amy Donaldson-Brass, episode 15, she shared her story of finding her own voice. This serves as a model of how someone else did it, and how we can do it. We love empowering stories that show the underdog winning because it models for us how the seemingly impossible becomes possible.

                We learn this as children as we speak to adults and they model for us how things are to be done. Dan McAdams, in his paper on the Psychology of Life Stories, says, “In conversation with adults about personal memories, young children become acquainted with the narrative structures through which events are typically discussed by people in their world.” By listening to the way adults tell stories, and to the stories they tell that model how the world should be, they/we are taught what is acceptable, what is not, how things should look, how situations should be handled.

                Now, let me point out the obvious: these stories are passed down multi-generationally, or at the very least from an adult to a growing and learning child. While this does not guarantee accuracy in the story, in any way, it does reflect life interpretations of what is acceptable. It is an actively constructed model of what the people before you and around you believe to be an acceptable life story. This interconnectedness between a human life and the culture in which that life is lived are often difficult to separate, and indeed the narratives “allow us to see lives as simultaneously individual and social creations,” according to the Personal Narrative Group article Interpreting Women’s Lives from the Bloomington and Indianapolis University Press. Vast numbers of influences play into the interpretation of a life, and these forces exert their power at a very early age. For example, Mary Gergen in her paper, Feminist Reconstructions in Psychology, points out that simply from a gender perspective, “…boys and girls are raised to regard their life trajectories differently.” The social, cultural, familial, religious and class expectation combine to prescribe a set of values that are acceptable and expected for each of us.

                So, identity is a cultural as well as an individual construct. The power in understanding this is, as we discussed in episode 001,  that this realization creates an understanding that at the very least, allows for a step away from absolutes. If you were born in China and your culture provided reason and expectation that women should have bound feet, or if you came from a culture where female circumcision was expected, or just because you were raised around prejudice or grew up with stories where “others” were marginalized, criticized, or harmed, doesn’t mean that we can’t seek for other models. While much of the world considers all of these atrocities, those within the cultures have accepted those actions and interpretations of life and people as acceptable and often even crucial to living in the way life is supposed to be lived for them. It is the understanding that these expectations are created by people who came before us and around us, and that that doesn’t necessarily make them right ways of thinking or being that becomes crucial. In fact, doing the work of stepping away from those culture constructs and finding other stories and models becomes crucial to examining life possibilities and the easiest way to expand our minds and to look at other ways of being is to find new models. This is where we begin to listen with open hearts to stories from people all over the world. To consider all the ways of living and to not define or marginalize our own lives because they didn’t turn out exactly as was prescribed by the culture we were raised in.

                I believe that part of accepting our stories is this understanding that there are multiple ways to live a life well. Understanding the fluidity and the man-made nature of expectation also gives us the understanding that because others say our story is not acceptable, does not make it so. If you need logical reasons to accept your story, there you have them.

                A more emotion based reason to accept your story is that you are beautiful and perfect. Your authentic self, the self before the experiences of living drug you through the mud a bit and had you wrapping yourself in protective armor, is fantastic and brilliant. You get to accept yourself just as you are – with all the scrapes and bruises, bullet wounds and scars, because there are the marks of living, learning and growing.

                Let’s close with the same quote we opened with: Debbie Ford said, “The greatest act of courage is to be and own all that you are. Without apology, without excuses, and without one’s masks to cover the truth of who you really are.”

                We live, we love, we fall, we try, we are, and we are doing our best. Accepting what is becomes crucial to moving forward and accepting your path, your life, your stories, yourself. Embrace your path and own it!

                We’ll see you next Wednesday for Step #2 for reframing your story. Work this week on accepting your story and Have fun creating your big, bold, wonderful story today! Pass this podcast series along to someone today who might find great relief in learning how to reframe their stories. Do a little good in the world and share the love. Also, go to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and sign up for the free mini-ebook on the five steps for reframing the parts of your story that feel broken. It can serve as a workbook on the process we are going through in this series. And if you would like to go to the next level, and take onlineline workshop with activities and exercises to help you get into more detail with these steps, go to the website and sign up. Lata fellow story makers.

                 

                ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1840Wed, 02 Aug 2017 09:00:03 -070020:30falsefullDo you want to be free of the stories in your life that make you feel small or that you find shame or guilt around? These stories often affect our self-perception and thus our interpreted self-worth. This workshop is to help you reframe and resee your life in healthier ways. The first episode in a 5-part series that will play during the month of August. Join us each week for the next step in the process. This week is Step 1 - Accept it!Lori LeeEpisode 45 Interview with the Kjars – 50 States in 52 Weeks via travel trailerInterview with the Kjars (pronounced Cares) 50 by 52

                The Kjar family sold their home, bought a motorhome, and took their four kids on the road for a year of seeing the country, meeting other kids their age in different parts of the country and shadowing their lives for a day, and learning how to live in cramped spaces for extended periods of time.

                Join us for today’s interview with Matt and Lindsay as we catch up with them on the road to hear how things are going and what wonderful stories and adventures they have created already.

                If you want to follow them:

                Website: 50by52.com
                YouTube: 50 by 52
                https://m.youtube.com/channel/UCZOrNZGr0hXDC_HROgo_2XQ
                Instagram: @50by52 https://www.instagram.com/50by52/

                Facebook: 50by52 in your shoes

                https://m.facebook.com/50by52InYourShoes/
                Twitter: @50by52 https://mobile.twitter.com/50by52/status/884540429437370369?refsrc=email
                ]]>Interview with the Kjars (pronounced Cares) 50 by 52

                The Kjar family sold their home, bought a motorhome, and took their four kids on the road for a year of seeing the country, meeting other kids their age in different parts of the country and shadowing their lives for a day, and learning how to live in cramped spaces for extended periods of time.

                Join us for today’s interview with Matt and Lindsay as we catch up with them on the road to hear how things are going and what wonderful stories and adventures they have created already.

                If you want to follow them:

                Website: 50by52.com
                YouTube: 50 by 52
                https://m.youtube.com/channel/UCZOrNZGr0hXDC_HROgo_2XQ
                Instagram: @50by52 https://www.instagram.com/50by52/

                Facebook: 50by52 in your shoes

                https://m.facebook.com/50by52InYourShoes/
                Twitter: @50by52 https://mobile.twitter.com/50by52/status/884540429437370369?refsrc=email
                ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1835Wed, 26 Jul 2017 09:00:20 -070020:06falsefullThe Kjar family sold their home, bought a motorhome, and took their four kids on the road for a year of seeing the country, meeting other kids their age in different parts of the country and shadowing their lives for a day, and learning how to live in cramped spaces day after day. Join us for today's interview with Matt and Lindsay as we catch up with them on the road to hear how things are going and what wonderful stories and adventures they have created already.Lori LeeEpisode 44 Dominoes. Ripples. The Butterfly Effect. – You Make A DifferenceDominos – Ripples – Butterfly Effect: You make a Difference

                Have you ever felt small or insignificant, maybe even powerless? In our big world where media gives us access to the vast happenings across the globe we come to realize the scope of the world, the overwhelming nature of the trauma and catastrophes across the globe, and all too often that bigness creates in us a sense of smallness; a sense of overwhelm and insignificance. Once we feel powerless, that our efforts will make no difference, we become passive passengers on this rock we call a planet. We hope for the best, but feel too small to instigate change. When we get to that place we have essentially stopped believing that we matter. Today I want to remind why this is untrue. Stay tuned for the small and simple things that change the world.

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                You’ve pushed the first domino in a string of set up dominoes and watched one fall into the next, and the next, and the next as the domino structure unfolds. You’ve thrown a rock in a pond and watched the ripples start small and get bigger and bigger until they cover the pond, or watched a fish break the surface of the water sending ripples out to the shore.  You’ve heard of the ‘butterfly effect’ which posits that the flap of a butterfly wing on one side of the world generates the air movement that eventually culminates in a storm on the other side of the world. All of these are an illustration of how one action sets in motion other actions, that continue to set off additional actions. And we do this a hundred times every day…

                There are thousands of reasons that each of us matter. They begin in the intrinsic value of being alive and that alone means we must be significant…to the butterfly effect and how even our smallest actions create responses, affect lives, change the world in ways we can’t fully understand.  If you’ve had a child you’ve changed the world. If you’ve loved someone you’ve had impact. If you’ve hurt someone you’ve pushed a domino. If you’ve shared or forgiven or learned something you have created some type of ripple. In a way, it seems like a silly thing to talk about because everything we do and don’t do affects the people and the world around us, in ways we can sometimes see and often in ways we cannot. It’s so obvious, but at the same time, maybe it’s not so obvious, so it merits a fifteen-minute conversation about how much we each matter in the world.

                Despite this tremendous influence and significance of each person, one of the most struggled with concepts, across the board, is that of self-worth. The one ghost that I have seen, as I’ve been privy to people’s deepest self-work, is that even the most successful of us, at our deepest core of things that hold us back, struggle with feelings of self-doubt and our own handful of insecurities about being enough—whether it’s physically, mentally, even spiritually. Self-doubt, in one way or another, is a killer of dreams and joy.

                It’s kind of crazy when you break it down. Cultural values that say odd things like – you matter if you’re a movie star, you matter if you’re a sports star, you matter if you make a lot of money…when you actually step back and evaluate the absurdness of those ideas and how heavily they are bought into, it’s disturbing. In Scientific American and Huffington Post in 2012 both ran articles on research that pre-teens put the value of being famous as their number one goal, overshadowing financial success, love, and community. American Idol, You...]]>Dominos – Ripples – Butterfly Effect: You make a Difference

                Have you ever felt small or insignificant, maybe even powerless? In our big world where media gives us access to the vast happenings across the globe we come to realize the scope of the world, the overwhelming nature of the trauma and catastrophes across the globe, and all too often that bigness creates in us a sense of smallness; a sense of overwhelm and insignificance. Once we feel powerless, that our efforts will make no difference, we become passive passengers on this rock we call a planet. We hope for the best, but feel too small to instigate change. When we get to that place we have essentially stopped believing that we matter. Today I want to remind why this is untrue. Stay tuned for the small and simple things that change the world.

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                You’ve pushed the first domino in a string of set up dominoes and watched one fall into the next, and the next, and the next as the domino structure unfolds. You’ve thrown a rock in a pond and watched the ripples start small and get bigger and bigger until they cover the pond, or watched a fish break the surface of the water sending ripples out to the shore.  You’ve heard of the ‘butterfly effect’ which posits that the flap of a butterfly wing on one side of the world generates the air movement that eventually culminates in a storm on the other side of the world. All of these are an illustration of how one action sets in motion other actions, that continue to set off additional actions. And we do this a hundred times every day…

                There are thousands of reasons that each of us matter. They begin in the intrinsic value of being alive and that alone means we must be significant…to the butterfly effect and how even our smallest actions create responses, affect lives, change the world in ways we can’t fully understand.  If you’ve had a child you’ve changed the world. If you’ve loved someone you’ve had impact. If you’ve hurt someone you’ve pushed a domino. If you’ve shared or forgiven or learned something you have created some type of ripple. In a way, it seems like a silly thing to talk about because everything we do and don’t do affects the people and the world around us, in ways we can sometimes see and often in ways we cannot. It’s so obvious, but at the same time, maybe it’s not so obvious, so it merits a fifteen-minute conversation about how much we each matter in the world.

                Despite this tremendous influence and significance of each person, one of the most struggled with concepts, across the board, is that of self-worth. The one ghost that I have seen, as I’ve been privy to people’s deepest self-work, is that even the most successful of us, at our deepest core of things that hold us back, struggle with feelings of self-doubt and our own handful of insecurities about being enough—whether it’s physically, mentally, even spiritually. Self-doubt, in one way or another, is a killer of dreams and joy.

                It’s kind of crazy when you break it down. Cultural values that say odd things like – you matter if you’re a movie star, you matter if you’re a sports star, you matter if you make a lot of money…when you actually step back and evaluate the absurdness of those ideas and how heavily they are bought into, it’s disturbing. In Scientific American and Huffington Post in 2012 both ran articles on research that pre-teens put the value of being famous as their number one goal, overshadowing financial success, love, and community. American Idol, You Tube, followers on social media, the obsession with needing exterior validation to feel worth is rampant. So let’s have a little bit of a reality check.

                The things that we do, the way we interact with others, the talents we share, the things we create, the love we generate, the smile, the hug, the choice to rescue a dog, to show patience, to forgive to notice someone else….my heavens I could go on forever with this list…these millions of interactions create responses, movements, feelings, and in general tremendous power in the world around us.  The ripple in the pond, the first domino pushed. Every day we impact one another in tremendous ways.

                Let me start with something I noticed as I have worked in groups who are doing healing work on their stories. One of the things I was initially most surprised at, was how often something small – a comment made by a peer or a teacher had literally shaped the stories in a child’s brain until as an adult they find it nearly impossible to shake off the imposed reality of the time in 6^th grade when a peer told them they were ugly. When I started teaching composition at Utah State University, we had an assignment where I had the students write about their history with writing and those teachers who had affected them most as they grew and learned to write. Inevitably there were a handful of students in each class who were certain they could not write because sometime in their elementary education they had received too many red marks on a paper, or a teacher had made a comment meant to instruct that instead was interpreted as a pronouncement that they were hopeless writers. I was shocked at how small comments, one-liners, a mark on a paper, had defined a complete interpretation of an individual’s concept of themselves. But then I considered, how in fourth grade I had written an essay about my doll Rachel and the paper had come back with praise about the descriptive detail and suddenly I knew I was a talented writer. These things are so incredibly small – and yet internalized in such a way as to be completely formative in another’s life. The other day a friend and I were talking and she shared how in grade school she had walked into a class and a class mate, who incidentally was caught up in a friend triangle, told her that she was ugly, and now, as a 40 something woman she still hears that child’s voice in her head every time she looks in the mirror.

                While these are a few negative examples of how the smallest things we do can significantly impact the trajectories of people’s lives, especially during their formative years, we also have the power to create tremendous good. I’d like to share a story told by Rick Lewis, he was a guest I interviewed on episode 41, and he tells about a time he unexpectedly had an interaction with an audience member that changed them both.

                Rick Lewis Story: Listen to the audio for this recording.

                Rick Lewis www.ricklewis.co or rick@ricklewis.co

                We’ve talked about how powerfully small things can affect us in negative ways if we buy into those stories, we’ve just heard how being patient, supportive, and kind can deeply impact another, Rick’s willingness to reach out and draw attention to and praise the man in the yellow tie for his dedication to kindness – praising another—can deeply affect another, let me share a few more stories sent to me from a listener about moments in the life of her family where they were deeply touched by the choices and actions of others:

                She says:

                We were a young married couple with two small children and had just bought our first home. When the water pipe broke, it was of course on our side of the city line and so we were responsible for fixing it. We didn’t have any money but somehow word reached a Doctor who lived up the hill from us. He had the know-how and a backhoe tractor and he came down and dug the hole for us and helped my husband to replace the pipe and covered it up. Every time I turn the water off I think of this kind man who would humble himself to help out our little family.

                When I was 8 ½ months pregnant with our third child our second child got the chicken pocks. After two weeks of nursing, her, myself and our oldest child got the chicken pocks. I have never been so sick in my life and so many horrible things can happen to a child when in the womb. I was sick of body and sick of mind. My friends and neighbors fed us for two weeks. Then I delivered a healthy baby girl, they fed us for two more weeks. They never made me feel as if I were a burden or an inconvenience in their lives.

                Four years later our oldest blew up is hand and needed surgery to reattach a tendon in his finger. Two weeks later the Dr. found a lump on the side of our youngest neck. He recommended that we have a biopsy of the lump because he felt it could be cancer. They would put him all the way under. This was because if he moved during the procedure the whole side of his face could be paralyzed. We were very worried about our boys and about how we would pay the medical bills. One day I went outside to get in the car and there in an envelope was $400 and a note telling us they hope this would help and we were loved.

                A few years ago her husband was diagnosed with brain cancer. During this time lots of choices by lots of people made a tremendous impact on this families life, for example, she lists:

                • His work sent his paycheck until the day he died. They didn’t have to do that.
                • People fed us often for eight months.
                • One night I took my husband back to our local hospital because of some complications. They wouldn’t send him to a bigger hospital because it was very possible that he would die on the way. our family Dr. sat with me all night long without charge as the nurses and Doctors fought to save his life long enough to get him to an intensive care unit.
                • My husband died Dec. 15 our daughter was married three days later in a quiet a snow storm. We were having the reception at our church. The members of our church made it happen. The walks were cleared the refreshment were taken care of as was the setup and take down. They helped make it a joyful day and day of happiness.
                • I was taken to lunch once or twice a week that first year.
                • My husband has two adult nieces that called me and sent me notes of encouragement regularly and still after almost 7 years they still check on me. During that time I went back to college, they were a great support at that time. One of them let me send my papers to her and she would correct the grammar and send them back to me.
                • Someone sends me flowers every year on Valentine day.
                
                

                She finishes her letter to me with the words: “From the smallest act to the very largest act, kindness changes people’s lives. Whether receiving or giving.”

                Rick Lewis said, in his book The Seven Rules You Were Born to Break, “Paying attention to the small daily details of our lives is one facet of excellence. When we ignore those details we discount our ability to make a difference in the lives of others and ourselves.”

                When we look about us on a daily basis to see what small act we can do for another, or how simply living our best life blesses the world, how getting rid of old negative stories that have played on rerun in our lives can free us from untruths that hold us back or make us feel insignificant, and how that changes our interaction with the world, which IS significant, we start to get an idea of how much control we have over the impact we have on the world, and how taking responsibility for small and simple things we can do causes tremendous impact around us. First, we simply have to acknowledge that no matter who you are, you are immensely significant and what you do and don’t do changes the world through ripple effects you can’t even predict. It’s crazy cool when you think about it. All you can control is what you put out there, and then the ripples start.

                My challenge to you this week is two-fold. First, sit down like the listener who sent me her list of kindnesses and take 15 minutes to think about the impact others have had on your life in a positive way. The second challenge is to look for a way to impact someone today. By small and simple things are great things brought to pass, and while you may not know how far reaching your action ends up being, you most certainly can push the first domino.

                Have a great week out there creating hero scenarios in your story. We’d love to hear some of your stories. Go to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and go to the contact us page – share, we read all your emails.

                 

                 

                 

                ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1816Wed, 19 Jul 2017 09:00:41 -070025:24falsefullDominos – Ripples – Butterfly Effect: You make a Difference Have you ever felt small or insignificant, maybe even powerless? In our big world where media gives us access to the vast happenings across the globe we come to realize the scope of the world, the overwhelming nature of the trauma and catastrophes across the…Lori LeeEpisode 43 Interview with Margaret Meloni – BUSINESS Leaders Speak the Language of StoriesInterview with Margaret Meloni  MBA, PMP

                Margaret is a speaker, writer, and teacher who supports project managers with the art and science of project management.

                Margaret understands that managing projects can be difficult and this is why her goal is to provide her community with knowledge and skills that can be used on the job RIGHT NOW! Her wish is to see her students take on tough projects and emerge as strong and sought after project managers.

                Margaret is a recipient of the University of California Los Angeles (UCLA) Distinguished Instructor Award and a contributing author to the book 101Great Ways to Enhance Your Career where she addressed the topic of conflict resolution. She has also been called upon to contribute to articles in PM Network®, the monthly magazine covering trends, tools and best practices in project management

                When she is not teaching, Margaret works to help project managers and other professionals resolve work related conflict and strengthen their soft skills. Her passion is to help people successfully navigate the workplace peacefully.

                For more information on Margaret Meloni: www.MargaretMeloni.com or www.pmstudent.com and join her community today. You can also find her on Twitter at @margaretmeloni or @pmStudent

                ]]>Interview with Margaret Meloni  MBA, PMP

                Margaret is a speaker, writer, and teacher who supports project managers with the art and science of project management.

                Margaret understands that managing projects can be difficult and this is why her goal is to provide her community with knowledge and skills that can be used on the job RIGHT NOW! Her wish is to see her students take on tough projects and emerge as strong and sought after project managers.

                Margaret is a recipient of the University of California Los Angeles (UCLA) Distinguished Instructor Award and a contributing author to the book 101Great Ways to Enhance Your Career where she addressed the topic of conflict resolution. She has also been called upon to contribute to articles in PM Network®, the monthly magazine covering trends, tools and best practices in project management

                When she is not teaching, Margaret works to help project managers and other professionals resolve work related conflict and strengthen their soft skills. Her passion is to help people successfully navigate the workplace peacefully.

                For more information on Margaret Meloni: www.MargaretMeloni.com or www.pmstudent.com and join her community today. You can also find her on Twitter at @margaretmeloni or @pmStudent

                ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1808Wed, 12 Jul 2017 09:00:46 -070024:44falsefullMargaret is a recipient of the University of California Los Angeles (UCLA) Distinguished Instructor Award and a contributing author to the book 101Great Ways to Enhance Your Career where she addressed the topic of conflict resolution. She has also been called upon to contribute to articles in PM Network®, the monthly magazine covering trends, tools and best practices in project management. Join us as we talk about how she learned the importance of story in business and her transition to using and teaching it.Lori LeeEpisode 42 Persistence – Why you keep on keepin’ onPersistence – the simple key to success

                I started sending my writing out for publication or sending out queries, while I was still in college: little blurbs on backpacking food and political rock climbing issues. I was willing to write for free.

                I look at the then and the now, and the one thing I know for certain is that the primary reason I am well published is because of persistence. Because, month after month, year after year, decade after decade I keep writing and I keep sharing, and after 20 odd years the successes add up. But if I’d gotten tired of it and given up after five years, or six years, or ten years, that would have garnered a different outcome. Now, I’m not suggesting that I have fabulous powers of persistent perseverance, because the truth is, writers always write because it’s inherent to who they are. We just keep writing because that’s what we feel like doing, but the lesson, the clarity this brings to me in hindsight, and that I bring to you, is that any time you can just keep going, you will get there. Whatever the reason you keep going–maybe it’s because you are doggedly determined and disciplined, maybe it’s because you are simply compelled to keep on keeping on, like I was, or more likely there is  some other “why” that moves you forward, but consistent persistent forward movement, WILL get you there. There is just simply something to be said for not giving up. One step after another will eventually get you to the top of the mountain. That’s a fact. Today’s episode is about the rewards of downright dogged persistence. The key to the door of success.

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story Power serves you best when you know how to use it

                Calvin Coolidge said, “Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not: nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not: unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not: the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent.”

                What is persistence? It’s starting, it’s continuing even when it gets hard, it is the courage to keep trying after you’ve faced defeat or exhaustion. It’s continued forward movement even when the payoff is not in sight. It takes focus and vision to carry on, day after day with any task or plan from which immediate rewards are not garnered. Persistence is not a trait found in the weak because it’s not easy, therefore not everyone persists. But, it is the foundation of accomplishment. It’s the key that often separates the ones who make it to the top, and those who do not.

                Let me share a story that I like to call One Grand Night – it contains some grand vistas, a grand sunrise, and some grand pain.

                Most mountaineers follow a protocol involving permits, backpacks with carefully selected gear, and physical preparation before climbing a mountain.  Not us.  It is our year to summit The Grand, the tallest peak of the Grand Teton Range in Wyoming, and after too many near cancellations of the trip because of logistics, Chad calls and says, “Let’s leave now, we’ll climb all night and summit at sunrise. We won’t even need a permit if we can do it without camping.”  And so we do.

                It is eleven p.m. by the time we arrive at the trailhead, 5 hours away,–Lupine Meadows parking lot.  The lot is filled with cars, SUV’s, trucks, and vans, the moon reflecting off the dark metal bodies lined like waiting soldiers for their hikers to return. It is high season in the Tetons and climbers must wait in line for a...]]>Persistence – the simple key to success

                I started sending my writing out for publication or sending out queries, while I was still in college: little blurbs on backpacking food and political rock climbing issues. I was willing to write for free.

                I look at the then and the now, and the one thing I know for certain is that the primary reason I am well published is because of persistence. Because, month after month, year after year, decade after decade I keep writing and I keep sharing, and after 20 odd years the successes add up. But if I’d gotten tired of it and given up after five years, or six years, or ten years, that would have garnered a different outcome. Now, I’m not suggesting that I have fabulous powers of persistent perseverance, because the truth is, writers always write because it’s inherent to who they are. We just keep writing because that’s what we feel like doing, but the lesson, the clarity this brings to me in hindsight, and that I bring to you, is that any time you can just keep going, you will get there. Whatever the reason you keep going–maybe it’s because you are doggedly determined and disciplined, maybe it’s because you are simply compelled to keep on keeping on, like I was, or more likely there is  some other “why” that moves you forward, but consistent persistent forward movement, WILL get you there. There is just simply something to be said for not giving up. One step after another will eventually get you to the top of the mountain. That’s a fact. Today’s episode is about the rewards of downright dogged persistence. The key to the door of success.

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story Power serves you best when you know how to use it

                Calvin Coolidge said, “Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not: nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not: unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not: the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent.”

                What is persistence? It’s starting, it’s continuing even when it gets hard, it is the courage to keep trying after you’ve faced defeat or exhaustion. It’s continued forward movement even when the payoff is not in sight. It takes focus and vision to carry on, day after day with any task or plan from which immediate rewards are not garnered. Persistence is not a trait found in the weak because it’s not easy, therefore not everyone persists. But, it is the foundation of accomplishment. It’s the key that often separates the ones who make it to the top, and those who do not.

                Let me share a story that I like to call One Grand Night – it contains some grand vistas, a grand sunrise, and some grand pain.

                Most mountaineers follow a protocol involving permits, backpacks with carefully selected gear, and physical preparation before climbing a mountain.  Not us.  It is our year to summit The Grand, the tallest peak of the Grand Teton Range in Wyoming, and after too many near cancellations of the trip because of logistics, Chad calls and says, “Let’s leave now, we’ll climb all night and summit at sunrise. We won’t even need a permit if we can do it without camping.”  And so we do.

                It is eleven p.m. by the time we arrive at the trailhead, 5 hours away,–Lupine Meadows parking lot.  The lot is filled with cars, SUV’s, trucks, and vans, the moon reflecting off the dark metal bodies lined like waiting soldiers for their hikers to return. It is high season in the Tetons and climbers must wait in line for a backcountry camping permit on the way up any one of the peaks: The Grand Teton, the Middle and South Tetons, the Nez Perce, Mount Owen, Mount Moran, or Teewinot.  During an ancient ice age, glaciers covered Jackson Hole and carved the jagged range with 3000 feet of ice melt.  We do not see the white glacier fields we climb by in the dark, but we hear the waterfalls and the river dumping down the mountain, looking for peace in one of the many lakes dotting the range.  By summiting in one day we will forgo the permit process, our headlamps illuminating small circles of rock as we make our way up the trail, up the rocks, up the chimneys, up the mountain.  As we climb I look into the dark at my left, yellow eyes catch the reflection of my headlamp.  They are big and bold and stare as if they know we cannot see them. They are unflinching as we make our way past.

                There is not much story to tell.  It is the same grueling thing step after step. Straight up. The trail up the Grand is not filled with switchbacks or meanders.  At 2:30 a.m. we pass a team heading down trail.  “The climbing is great,” they say, their headlamps lighting our faces as ours light theirs. They don’t want to stay on the mountain because they are hungry.  One says, “We would rather be tired than tired and hungry.” We exchange beta, offer food, and pass with well wishes.  It is not long before other teams start waking, preparing for the summit.  In the dark we are all easy to spot, headlamps pierce the darkness with yellow and blue light.  We gauge how close we are to the next team, how much faster we need to move to stay ahead.  By the time we get to the Upper Saddle I am picking my legs up one at a time, very, very, slowly.  Chad is well ahead.  He is more worried about another team passing us.  I say, “let them.”  I can hardly walk. We’ve been pushing non-stop for hours up a consistent incline to the top of one of the most beautiful and rugged ranges in the West.  It is still dark and this is the last stretch until we are directly in assault of the peak itself. So far we have done 7 up-hill miles in six hours. Lines of headlamps twist their way up the trail behind us.  It is interesting to watch the snake of lights curving its way slowly up the mountain. It provides a pulse of life, an urgency. Other people are going for the summit.

                At times I lay against rocks trying to slow my breathing to an aerobic state.  When we were still in the trees I stopped and wrapped my arms around a pine, every now and again, let it hold me up until my breathing slowed; I turned and stepped back onto the trail, one leg after the other, again. It is a race the way we push each other, and it is not a race, the way we each have to find our own way up the mountain.

                The light on the eastern horizon is a strip of purple and orange glowing through a mist from the lakes.  Oh, there are lakes.  From this vantage point of nearly 13,000 feet, we have the view of gods.  Below us, down thousands of vertical cliff feet and farther still, the remnant lakes dot the curvatures of the range.  Jenny Lake, String Lake, Surprise Lake, Amphitheatre Lake, and lakes for which I don’t know the names.  Off the west side of the Upper Saddle, the exposure becomes extreme. Cliff walls tan and sheer, fall away as if this is the chute to the middle of the world, it just drops and drops and drops into cliffs very far below.  I sit on a boulder staring to the west, doing homage in this cathedral, the light of morning pressing its fingers just far enough into the sky behind me that I can see where I may fall.  When I climb or even look along cliff walls of this magnitude I cannot help but picture my body tumbling down, cartwheel style, to a bottom I would only know for an instant.  I like to think I would have the presence of mind to tuck and flip, make some graceful and impressive aerobatic moves on my way out.  Maybe flap my arms and think about flying, like Icarus, feeling the wind in my hair, knowing how close I am to heaven.

                I’m interrupted as a guide and his client make their way up behind us, so I move, head to Bellycrawl, a horizontal flake along the abyss itself.  This, Chad moves across, unprotected, one hand and toehold at a time.  There is no margin for error and I am a mother with two small sons.  I remove my pack, send it over to Chad and straddle the flake.  I am more secure with all four appendages as an anchor.  Today is not the day for a swan dive. We can do dangerous, but we can do dangerous carefully.

                At 6:45 a.m. we position the camera for our timed summit shot.  Chad photos the steel disk embedded in the rock: 13,770 feet; Grand Teton.  We are here on the top of the world to watch the sun roll.  It is color and brightness, the haze across the range is light infused, and we are so tired this seems like the right place to nap, the right place to curl up with the wind and the sun, settle into exhausted dreams of jacuzzis and foot massages.  Alas, we have two repels and 9 downhill miles on which to torture our knees, ankles, and toes before such frivolity. But for now, we sit at the top, the hard-fought summit, and watch the sun rise on the world in all its orange, yellow and purple glory. For 30-minutes we are exultant. We are gods looking down on creation. We are exhausted and a little giddy, and we are on the top!!!

                This would be a nice place to end the story, but contrary to the Disney adaptation of fairy tales, there is life after the happily ever after.

                As we keep on keepin on, we must now return to the car. Having not brought hang gliders we must return the way we came, via foot. There is another day’s work ahead of us, and as the exhausted often do, we become giddy.  Before we reach the car, we are spouting stupid remarks and giving other mountaineers the superhero sign we have invented on the way down.  It is the secret sign we give when we see a helmet and gear that tells us they are going to a peak, not just a lake or an afternoon walk to the Meadows.  Chad creates his superhero persona and admits he will wear green tights with a yellow lightening rod on a helmet.  His superhero name is In-Cognito.  Now, looking back, the whole thing makes no sense whatsoever – so don’t expect it to, but at the time it was hilarious.  I decided I would be a superheroine fairy with purple gold wings.  This makes even less sense than Mr. In-Cognito, but if I could have flown down that mountain my feet would have been much happier.

                We created weird story scenarios, and the closer we got the more tired and sore we became, the rawer my feet got. The last two miles to the car were the hardest of the trip.  “Focus on a goal,” Chad said, “something you want at the car.”  I waddled down the trail saying my high school locker combination over and over in my mind.  It’s just a thing I do when endurance is required.

                2:15 pm, we hit the car and I grab the keys, start the air conditioner, dump a bottle of water over my head and take off my shoes.  I sit riverside and wash the blisters and grime on my toes, ice water numbing the pain with a different kind of pain.

                With my wet butt back in the driver’s seat the trip becomes epic, as they always do.  Chad sleeps and I drive to Village Inn for banana-brownie pie and a really bad Philly-beef sandwich.

                “Ain’t life Grand,” I say to myself as I pull out onto the road and drive past the big brown sign that says Grand Teton National Park. I look up at the peak we were just sitting on, and it seems impossible and possible all at the same time. So far up, so majestic, so rugged.  Just one step – sometimes brisk, sometimes dragging, sometimes compensating for a blister, one step at a time, through the pain, the danger, the exhaustion, and the unknown. That’s how you make it to the top of a mountain. And if you stop, you will not see the sunrise over the world, or feel the satisfaction of a fight well fought, you won’t sit with God in a moment of knowing. That’s just the way it is.

                There are a lot of things in life that take persistence. Hobbies, careers, relationships, fitness, heck…persistence is the key to actually making things happen. Not giving up. You want to get published? You want to get to the top of the mountain? You want to get fit? You want a good relationship? You want to ski that line? Learn to catch fish? Become something you’re proud of? Teach your kids to read? Get your kid raised? Run that marathon?  It’s going to take persistence. In a world that is filled with immediate gratification, and a culture that almost demands it, persistence may be something we need to think about a little more because it’s so much a part of being the hero. Your story isn’t going to have many action-packed moments if at resistance and roadblocks you just sit down or turn around.

                I want to share a passage with you from the book The Postmistress, by Sarah Blake. On page 119 there is a passage where an American reporter is over in England, boots on the ground, reporting via radio what’s going on during WWII and the blitzkrieg bombing of England. She is retelling a scene she’s lived through.

                “Yesterday evening I found myself once again on my stomach, flattened to the sidewalk for protection after a close call. Nothing had been hit nearby but the sound had been deafening and there are always the three or four seconds right after a bomb when you are too shaky to stand. After a little while, I pushed myself up, first to my knees, and then slowly to my feet. Across the way on the other side of the street, two boys, about ten years old, had pulled themselves off the ground also and were busy trying to back their frightened horse in the stays of their delivery cart. Come, they cajoled, weeping, wiping their tears on their sleeves, Come on, the boys patted and murmured, though they couldn’t stop their own sobs. And slowly, ever so slowly, the animal calmed and stood. Sniffling, the boys climbed up on the cart, clucked and jerked the reins, and went off again down the street.

                Waiting and watching. Weeping into your sleeves – those are not the traits of heroes, neither Ulysses, nor Aeneas, and not Joshua. Think, rather, of Penelope. Think of all the women down through the years who have watched and waited, but who, like the boys with their horse, wept and picked themselves up and went on—and you will have a small sense , then, of the heroes here. The occupied, the bombed, and the very, very, brave. This is Frankie Bard, in London, Goodnight.”  The character in the book, listening to the radio broadcast stood back from the radio and crossed her arms—she was fairly sure that the radio gal had just redefined the nature of a hero.”  –Getting back up, and continuing on.

                Sometimes persistence is about making it through tragedy. Like the war. Sometimes persistence is about being able to keep trying so you reach your goal, create what you have decided to create. Sometimes persistence is about retraining your neural pathways to change behavior or thought patterns for better living, for creating habits you want, not habits that have grabbed you and hung on. Sometimes persistence is just waking up every day, putting your feet on the ground, and trying again for whatever feels valuable to you.

                While persistence can be seen as the drudgery of pushing through pain and resistance, we can also choose to find a perspective with a little more pizzaz – that persistence is about bravery, about power, about hero stuff. Find a way to insert the fun, and gratitude in your persistent path. What might that look like?

                Maybe it involves imagining a superhero costume and dashing, or limping forward on the trail of life, but with the knowledge that what you’re doing is moving from average to greatness, from stagnant to motile, from hoping to doing.

                In the book Lead with Story,  Paul Smith shares this rendition of President Abraham Lincoln’s life events. I share it again here because President Lincoln could be the poster boy for persistence. He was a man of tremendous resistance to the ravages of life. A man of earned wisdom. And he is one of our countries greatest heroes, and yet his story is one that must have required phenomenal fortitude of heart and mind. A real hero. Let’s take another glimpse at his life:

                “When he was seven years old, his family was forced out of their home and off their farm. Like other boys his age, he was expected to work to help support the family. When he was nine, his mother died. At age of 22, the company he worked for went bankrupt and he lost his job. At 23, he ran for state legislature in a field of 13 candidates. He came in eighth. At 24, he borrowed money to start a business with a friend. By the end of the year, the business failed. The local sheriff seized his possessions to pay off his debt. His partner soon died, penniless, and he assumed his partner’s share of debt as well. He spent the next several years of his life paying it off. At 25, he ran for state legislature again. This time he won. At 26, he was engaged to be married. But his fiancée died before the wedding. The next year he plunged into a depression and suffered a nervous breakdown. At 29, he sought to become the speaker of the state legislature. He was defeated. AT 34, he campaigned for a U.S. congressional seat, representing his district. He lost. At 35, he ran for Congress again. This time he won. He went to Washington and did a good job. At 39, when his term ended, he was out of a job again. There was a one term limit rule in his party. At 40, he tried to get a job as commissioner of the General Land office. He was rejected.

                At 45 he campaigned for the U.S. Senate, representing his state. He lost by 6 electoral votes. At 47, he was one of the contenders for the vice-presidential nomination at his party’s national convention. He lost.  At 49, he ran for the same U.S. Senate seat a second time. And for a second time he lost.  Two years later, at the age of 51, after a lifetime of failure, disappointment, and loss (and relatively unknown outside of his home state of Illinois) Abraham Lincoln was elected the 16^th president of the United States. He served only four years in office before his final defeat at the hands of an assassin. But, during those 4 years, President Lincoln successfully led the country through its greatest internal crisis, the American Civil War, preserved the Union; ended slavery; and rededicated the nation to the ideals of equality, liberty, and democracy. So the next time you think about quitting because you’ve already tried and failed, ask yourself this How different would the country be if Abraham Lincoln had stopped trying after his first defeat….or his fifth….or his tenth.”

                Who you are and what you are here to do, is most often unknown. Some people have a clarity about this, a sense they are following, but I’m certain President Lincoln had no idea he was destined to become the lynchpin that held the United States of America together, nor did he understand the stress, strain, and utter depletion it would require to do what had to be done, day by day, hour by hour, decision by decision. But he moved on, one step after another, and he changed the world.

                Who knows what you are here to do, or what I am here to do. Or the impact of our actions and choices, our sacrifices and our efforts. You’ve heard of the butterfly effect – how a butterfly flapping his wings on one side of the world can affect the weather on the other side of the world. It’s often used as a metaphor to illustrate how small things can have large effects. When we keep going, it matters. When we give up, it matters, we just don’t always know in what ways it matters.

                If you’re working on a project, a talent, a relationship, a business, beating an addiction…a mountain to climb, remember that if you]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1784Wed, 05 Jul 2017 09:00:04 -070025:15falsefullCalvin Coolidge said, “Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not: nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not: unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not: the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent.” Join us today for some stories and thoughts on persistence in our own lives and why it makes all the difference.Lori LeeEpisode 041 Interview with Rick Lewis – Professional MisbehaverWelcome back to the Love Your Story interview land. A couple quick announcements before we get started – I wanted to let you know that there is a new free mini-e-book available on the Love Your Story podcast website. It’s called The 5 Steps to Reframing the parts of your story that Feel Broken. Just give us your email and we’ll send it to your inbox.

                Now, let me tell you who we’re talking with today. This man is something else.

                From Arizona,  Rick Lewis is a speaker, author, entertainer, professional misbehaver – yes, misbehaver, and confidence coach. He started as a child actor, and street performer, using humor, comedy, and theater to overcome his fears.  From this, he has become a sought-after speaker, author, and trainer who has appeared before more than 400 organizations in the last 20 years. Rick’s book, 7 Rules You Were Born to Break, is a celebrated business book that uses stories to inspire growth and his coming book, Confident Under Stress, is again a collection of stories from Rick’s own professional journey about responding to life’s opportunities and challenges with confidence and courage. Stay with us and hear some of his stories and his thoughts on how our reactions to current situations are our old stories pasted on the present.

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                Interview with Rick Lewis

                There are two primary reasons I think this idea of reaction and action are so powerful. The first is that when we act we are in charge. When we react, our past is in charge. Usually, reactions are unfair and cause things in the present to go badly. This makes it a very important thing to understand so we can act as we choose in the current situation, creating love instead of more of whatever we are dragging behind us. You know, those things we call “hot buttons.”  The second reason is that in order to reframe our stories we have to learn how to step away from the stories of the past as something set in stone.

                Wayne Dyer, a man revered for his spiritual and mindfulness work, said “One of the greatest lessons of my own life was learning to turn the inner rampage of hatred and anger toward my own father for his reprehensible behavior and abandonment of his family into an inner reaction more closely aligned with God and God-realized love.”

                Wayne is specifically talking about taking one of his life stories and learning to reframe his reaction from hatred to love. This is an important key to many of our most difficult stories.

                 

                For more information on Rick Lewis:

                www.ricklewis.co

                www.facebook.com/ricklewisco;

                Rick’s books include: 7 Rules You Were Born to Break 

                Coming soon: Confident Under Pressure

                ]]>Welcome back to the Love Your Story interview land. A couple quick announcements before we get started – I wanted to let you know that there is a new free mini-e-book available on the Love Your Story podcast website. It’s called The 5 Steps to Reframing the parts of your story that Feel Broken. Just give us your email and we’ll send it to your inbox.

                Now, let me tell you who we’re talking with today. This man is something else.

                From Arizona,  Rick Lewis is a speaker, author, entertainer, professional misbehaver – yes, misbehaver, and confidence coach. He started as a child actor, and street performer, using humor, comedy, and theater to overcome his fears.  From this, he has become a sought-after speaker, author, and trainer who has appeared before more than 400 organizations in the last 20 years. Rick’s book, 7 Rules You Were Born to Break, is a celebrated business book that uses stories to inspire growth and his coming book, Confident Under Stress, is again a collection of stories from Rick’s own professional journey about responding to life’s opportunities and challenges with confidence and courage. Stay with us and hear some of his stories and his thoughts on how our reactions to current situations are our old stories pasted on the present.

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                Interview with Rick Lewis

                There are two primary reasons I think this idea of reaction and action are so powerful. The first is that when we act we are in charge. When we react, our past is in charge. Usually, reactions are unfair and cause things in the present to go badly. This makes it a very important thing to understand so we can act as we choose in the current situation, creating love instead of more of whatever we are dragging behind us. You know, those things we call “hot buttons.”  The second reason is that in order to reframe our stories we have to learn how to step away from the stories of the past as something set in stone.

                Wayne Dyer, a man revered for his spiritual and mindfulness work, said “One of the greatest lessons of my own life was learning to turn the inner rampage of hatred and anger toward my own father for his reprehensible behavior and abandonment of his family into an inner reaction more closely aligned with God and God-realized love.”

                Wayne is specifically talking about taking one of his life stories and learning to reframe his reaction from hatred to love. This is an important key to many of our most difficult stories.

                 

                For more information on Rick Lewis:

                www.ricklewis.co

                www.facebook.com/ricklewisco;

                Rick’s books include: 7 Rules You Were Born to Break 

                Coming soon: Confident Under Pressure

                ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1778Wed, 28 Jun 2017 09:00:06 -070031:37falsefullRick Lewis, author, speaker and professional misbehaver started out as a street performer. He shares what he's learned about how our old stories get pasted onto our present situation, and why that is not in our best interest. Listen in for his thoughts and insights on our stories and how we can get them to work for us rather than against us.Lori LeeEpisode 040 A Facebook Post About How To Create Your DreamsA Facebook Post About How To Create Your Dreams 

                There are moments in our lives when someone succinctly verbalizes our beliefs and understanding in a clear and perfect fashion, and we say “Yes! That is exactly what I have come to know,” or “Yes, that is exactly what I think.” This happened to me this week. My son is on an LDS mission where he is out serving others and teaching them about Christ. While he is doing this he has very limited contact with family. Once a week the missionaries get a chance to write home, but other than that they stay focused on their work. Recently, the LDS church allowed the missionaries to have Facebook pages where they post inspiring messages and thoughts. It’s a real treat when I’m on Facebook and something pops up from my son, but today was especially interesting because his words were the exact encapsulation of everything I had been working on over the last year. Let me share them and then I’ll tell you my story. Stay tuned for the rest of the tale…

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                Here is his post:

                “A thought I had recently was that if we allow them, dreams can be so much more than just happy thoughts and wishful thinking. They can be more than pleasant imaginings left for a world more perfect than this. If we let it, the act of dreaming and then working with determination and courage can be one of the most powerful demonstrations of faith possible to man. As we team up with the Lord and “do many things of [our] own free will, and bring to pass much righteousness” (D&C [58:27]) then, by the grace of God, will we be able to develop the competency and ability we need to steadily overcome the obstacles we find that are placed in our way. As we grow to trust the promise that “all things are possible to him that believeth” (Mark [9:23]) the Lord will enable us according to the faith that we exercise in him, and we may achieve that which we have determined to be our goal. So dream big, work hard, trust much, and then enjoy watching the miracles come to pass.”

                That’s the end of his post. When I read that my first thought was, “Yay! – I needed to read that today, all of my daily struggle put into such a clear and organized paragraph.” My second thought was, “I wondered if he really knew what that meant. I have been working on this for the last year, and I’m still working with it every day, how does he just suddenly have this thought and ‘bam’ there it all is.” Maybe I’m a little slower than my son, but let me share my journey – that I’m still on, by the way – of coming to understand and live this principle. And I share it, because it may serve as a model of how to make your dreams happen.

                “Dreams can be more than just a wish or a happy thought” –  When I was in my early 20’s I had a conversation with God. I wanted three things more than anything in my life, and I felt like, in this particular conversation, that I’d been given the right to ask for them. The first was that I would have an extraordinary relationship and connection with the right man. That I’d have a husband who was my other half – the right fit. The right guy.  The second was that my children would be watched over, protected and upheld. The third was that I would be able to use my talents, gifts, and abilities to give back to the world, to create something that would inspire and lift other people. In my mind, because I was/am a writer, I pictured that being an inspirational...]]>A Facebook Post About How To Create Your Dreams 

                There are moments in our lives when someone succinctly verbalizes our beliefs and understanding in a clear and perfect fashion, and we say “Yes! That is exactly what I have come to know,” or “Yes, that is exactly what I think.” This happened to me this week. My son is on an LDS mission where he is out serving others and teaching them about Christ. While he is doing this he has very limited contact with family. Once a week the missionaries get a chance to write home, but other than that they stay focused on their work. Recently, the LDS church allowed the missionaries to have Facebook pages where they post inspiring messages and thoughts. It’s a real treat when I’m on Facebook and something pops up from my son, but today was especially interesting because his words were the exact encapsulation of everything I had been working on over the last year. Let me share them and then I’ll tell you my story. Stay tuned for the rest of the tale…

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                Here is his post:

                “A thought I had recently was that if we allow them, dreams can be so much more than just happy thoughts and wishful thinking. They can be more than pleasant imaginings left for a world more perfect than this. If we let it, the act of dreaming and then working with determination and courage can be one of the most powerful demonstrations of faith possible to man. As we team up with the Lord and “do many things of [our] own free will, and bring to pass much righteousness” (D&C [58:27]) then, by the grace of God, will we be able to develop the competency and ability we need to steadily overcome the obstacles we find that are placed in our way. As we grow to trust the promise that “all things are possible to him that believeth” (Mark [9:23]) the Lord will enable us according to the faith that we exercise in him, and we may achieve that which we have determined to be our goal. So dream big, work hard, trust much, and then enjoy watching the miracles come to pass.”

                That’s the end of his post. When I read that my first thought was, “Yay! – I needed to read that today, all of my daily struggle put into such a clear and organized paragraph.” My second thought was, “I wondered if he really knew what that meant. I have been working on this for the last year, and I’m still working with it every day, how does he just suddenly have this thought and ‘bam’ there it all is.” Maybe I’m a little slower than my son, but let me share my journey – that I’m still on, by the way – of coming to understand and live this principle. And I share it, because it may serve as a model of how to make your dreams happen.

                “Dreams can be more than just a wish or a happy thought” –  When I was in my early 20’s I had a conversation with God. I wanted three things more than anything in my life, and I felt like, in this particular conversation, that I’d been given the right to ask for them. The first was that I would have an extraordinary relationship and connection with the right man. That I’d have a husband who was my other half – the right fit. The right guy.  The second was that my children would be watched over, protected and upheld. The third was that I would be able to use my talents, gifts, and abilities to give back to the world, to create something that would inspire and lift other people. In my mind, because I was/am a writer, I pictured that being an inspirational book that was successful in reaching a broad audience. That was it. Everything else I wanted, my career, my schooling, my fun was all a huge part of my life and way of living, but the foundational aspects of a meaningful life for me were found in those three things. I suspect, these basic components are universal for many people. The desire to love and be loved, to have the best for your children, and to give back to the world, these are not new ideas, just meaningful ones.

                So, of the three only the second one, the protection, and amplification of my beautiful children, has been given to me. And, to be honest, if I had to have only one, I would sacrifice everything else for that, so thank God for his tender mercies. But that being said, let’s look at the other two for a moment.

                The first, to find the right man, has been the largest and longest struggle of my life. When we open ourselves to love we also open ourselves to heartbreak – the two go hand-in-hand, so there has been a lot of pain and disappointment. For those of you who are regular listeners to this podcast you already have a lot of background information about this area of my life, because my three marriages and all the heartbreak and struggle involved along the way has been the major part of my story that had to be reframed. I had to find the purpose behind all the broken dreams and broken hearts, because the emotional reality of it, before the reframe, was just a messy life of what felt like tremendous hurt and accumulating failure. I have loved well, and I have loved deeply, but the depth to which we love is usually equal to the pain in which we feel upon the loss of or betrayal of that love. Let’s just say no one can ever say I didn’t try. I’m not sure how I keep standing back up, but by the grace of God.

                The third item is the real story today. Last spring I had an impression that really stuck out to me. “Be it unto you according to your faith.” Now, this is a common expression, it comes from scripture, so it’s not new, but it stood out to me enough at that moment that I held on to it. I carved out a space to find out what this was about. About this same time my friend Sally returned from a Next Level Discovery workshop. She pulled me into her office one day, told me about it and said, not in these exact words, but something along the lines of, “Lori, this workshop was extremely powerful and you need it. I really think in order to move forward you’re going to need to get past all your accumulated resentment toward men, and this can be a tool to help you do it.”  I trust Sally, so I told her I’d think about it. And I did, and I went, even though it meant flying across the United States. I knew I was stuck in my life and I didn’t know how to get unstuck. I felt myself banging my head against this wall that never moved, and I didn’t have the understanding or skills to get past it. So, what did I have to lose? Worst case scenario I’d have a weekend away in Columbus, Ohio, and I got my best friend to go with me, so we’d make a week of it.

                Well, I found myself in the workshop remembering item #3. I found myself opening up the old dreams that had been shoved to the bottom of the pile, given up on, covered in the musty t-shirts and dirty socks of time, and before I knew it I was standing in front of the workshop group, 100-people strong, declaring that I would write my New York Times Best Selling book that would influence and inspire. I imagined it so vividly while I sat in that room that I literally felt it happening – I felt the feelings that I would feel when the things I wanted most manifested and for the first time it had teeth, I believed. What I didn’t know at the time was how much incredible work lay ahead. I also didn’t know how the project would morph into a podcast and the other things that have taken shape because of it. Most of all what I didn’t know was how much faith it would take every day to get out of bed and work on a project when I’m not clear on where it’s going. I can see one step ahead at a time, and only one. It’s like a mist. I feel God’s support, I feel my own desire to contribute and add value to the world, I have my vision, but so much of the day-to-day effort unfolds completely on faith. Without faith in a desired outcome, we do not engage in anything. We do not apply for a job we know we have no chance of getting, or ask someone out who is way out of our league, or try out for the Major Leagues unless we think we have a shot at it. Without faith in a course of action, we do not embark upon that course. So, getting up every day and trusting that I’ll be led, that the path I am headed down is going somewhere, that in the end I’ll actually make some type of impact in a fun and loving way as I intend, this is a path of tremendous faith for me.

                So, back to my son’s words.

                He goes on to say, “Working with determination and courage can be one of the most powerful demonstrations of faith possible to man. This is what he said, that 20-year-old kid just throws that out there, while his 47-year-old mother is living it, feeling it every day. But then I realized, he is doing the same thing in his life. Every day he wakes up at [6:00] and works with determination and courage as he goes into the community to serve and share the love of Christ. His efforts are not always met with acceptance, as you can imagine, but doing it every day is definitely one of the most powerful demonstrations of faith possible to man. We show faith when we move our feet. When we use our hearts and minds and actions to pursue a course of action. Faith without works is dead. But to get to the point where we will act we have to overcome fears – that’s a plural. Fear of failure, fear of wasted time, fear of looking stupid, fear of fill in the blank. Faith is the opposite of fear.

                Then he said, “Team up with the Lord and do many things of our own free will.”  A few years ago I came up with a three-tiered approach to living well that I felt encapsulated all the directive God had given us and made sense to me in an applicable way. For me, it was an attempt to simplify a lot of commandments and expectations. The three tiers were as follows: First – virtuous living is required in order to live a life that is clean and clear so one has the greatest chance of inspiration and guidance. All those commandments about keeping your mind and your heart and your body clean are all toward the end result of virtue, and virtue is power through a greater connection with God. It is god-like. No unclean thing can enter into the presence of God, and while we are all mortal and messy, the more virtue with which we live, the clearer the channel of communication with God.

                The second tier encompasses all the Love. This tier is about our relationships and the importance of loving each other, forgiving, serving and truly coming to a space of win/win with our fellow man. Coming to understand our connectedness and power with one another.

                The third tier then transitions into creation. This is where we start taking mini steps toward being like our father, who is a creator, and we start creating things ourselves. We take action and we create. I know from God’s perspective my little bitty creations and my struggle every day to do this is minuscule. Almost laughable, but I think about watching my children grow up and how hard they had to work to walk, and dress themselves, and clean their rooms, and do their homework, and as they learn and grow we watch them and cheer them on. And I’m sure God is doing the same thing with me. The other day I was attending a temple service and suddenly there was a clarity about the small but miraculous serendipitous and positive steps forward, answers to prayers, and blessings that had shown up in my life. Because they happen one day at a time the small successes often get clumped together as part of the process of moving forward, but I felt the Lord pointing out that these were his way of supporting me, and reminding me of them was his way of letting me know he was walking along side me. That he was there, he was aware, and he was supporting my efforts. So, back to Christian’s thought, “Team up with the Lord and do many things of our own free will.” That third tier of using our agency to create good, of our own free will, using our agency to make things happen, I feel we have a responsibility to do so, and that God will expect us to account for our time and what we did with it. That’s why tier three is important – agency, action, and faith to create things, but we are not alone in our efforts. Teaming up with the Lord to create positive creation in the world is a powerful level to live on.

                My son’s next sentence was, “By the grace of God we will be able to develop the competency and ability needed to steadily overcome the obstacles we find in front of us.” There is not one part of that sentence that does not resonate with me. Each day I pray that my brain will connect the dots. That the Lord will give me clarity in pulling ideas together. I fall terribly short more often than not, but I certainly ask for his help and through the grace of God, occasionally I am given an increased competency and ability to do what I’m doing, and more often than not it IS indeed overcoming an obstacle. That’s another thing I didn’t realize starting out on the Love Your Story adventure. I had no idea how many obstacles there would be, and how often that obstacle would be me. How often I would have to actively override the fear or apathy circuits and flush them with faith and sometimes just motion. Just because we are creating and in motion with a desire to do good, create value in the world, does not mean that obstacles, fear, money, exhaustion, diversion, lack-of-focus, etc. will not be our companions. I believe that third tier about creation and action provides a whole different level of learning and spiritual growth. It requires discipline, faith, hope, persistence, vision and a host of other spiritual muscles that get flexed and worked out on a daily basis.

                My son’s next line, “All things are possible to him that believeth (Mark [9:23]). The Lord will enable us according to the faith we exercise in him.” This brings us full circle to the beginning of my story, the time last spring where I felt the impression of “Be it unto you according to your faith.” I understand much better now why that thought was impressed upon my mind right before I embarked on this journey that I had no idea I was embarking on. One thing for certain in my story, I can only see one or two steps ahead of me at any given time. Mostly it’s a wing and a prayer, but the promise that all things are possible to him that believeth is a powerful promise. Each day I say, “help thou my unbelief,” and then I start walking forward. Can I just say, if nothing else, I am flexing some spiritual muscle and some days it’s more successful than others, but in the end of all this, no one can say I didn’t try for my number three wish either. And, because I believe, in the words of Yoda, “there is no try, only do,” therefore, I will go forth, and as my son said in his concluding remarks, “Dream big, work hard, trust much, and then enjoy watching the miracles!”

                Thank you for listening to the Love Your Story podcast and indulging me in telling so much of my own personal story. Your challenge for this week is to think about your own story. Where could you use a little more belief in yourself? A little more faith to propel you forward? What fear story can you shut down today so you can take one more step forward in faith? Please share this podcast, subscribe, rate and leave us a review. Unless you don’t like it, then skip the review part. Also, a freebie for you – go to our website, www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and get the free mini-ebook for 5 Steps to Reframing the Parts of Your Story that Feel Broken. It will come straight to your inbox, no strings. Have a great week creating your stories.

                 

                 

                ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1773Wed, 21 Jun 2017 09:00:10 -070018:00falsefullA Facebook Post About How To Create Your Dreams  There are moments in our lives when someone succinctly verbalizes our beliefs and understanding in a clear and perfect fashion, and we say “Yes! That is exactly what I have come to know,” or “Yes, that is exactly what I think.” This happened to me this…Lori LeeEpisode 039 Interview with Matt Garner – BUSINESS Speaker and CEO of Longboard PRMatt Garner, CEO of Longboard PR and a public speaker, specializes in helping people understand how to connect with their audience, and he’s a real fan of story.

                5 Tips for How To Tell A Story– with Matthew Garner

                Welcome back to Love Your Story interview land. Today I am bringing you Matthew Garner and he’s going to share his 5 tips for how to tell a story that impacts. Why does this apply to you?  Well, no matter who you are every day you are telling stories. We use stories to help our kids, our friends, our employees understand what we need or want them to do. We use stories to make real connections with each other and share our experiences. We use stories when we present ourselves at work, church, or in social circles. Stories have soooo many functions in our lives – it’s how we share awe, how we share lessons we learned – both good and bad, it’s how we make sense of things that have happened to us, it’s how we let someone into our experiences and share our lives.  Now, while story comes super naturally to everyone, and you’ve been telling stories your whole life, understanding how to tell them effectively makes you more effective and powerful in your communication. Stay Tuned.

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                If you are a leader of a family, or a manager or leader at work, you need mad story skills. Story is the genre that everyone understands – you get a much better response when you share an idea or an expectation through a story that illustrates the example, rather than an explanation or a demand. Try it. But first, we’ll get a few tips from Matt so that you can rock it!

                Matt Garner is from Longboard PR. He is a retired US Army Lieutenant Colonel who started his PR company when he retired.  His company helps companies and individuals increase their business by helping them understand their audience and how to send the message most effectively to that audience. Matt is a master storyteller, speaker and trainer, and he’s here to share his Wisdom.

                 

                To contact Matt:

                (801) 786-9383

                matt@longboardpr.com

                 

                 

                 

                ]]>Matt Garner, CEO of Longboard PR and a public speaker, specializes in helping people understand how to connect with their audience, and he’s a real fan of story.

                5 Tips for How To Tell A Story– with Matthew Garner

                Welcome back to Love Your Story interview land. Today I am bringing you Matthew Garner and he’s going to share his 5 tips for how to tell a story that impacts. Why does this apply to you?  Well, no matter who you are every day you are telling stories. We use stories to help our kids, our friends, our employees understand what we need or want them to do. We use stories to make real connections with each other and share our experiences. We use stories when we present ourselves at work, church, or in social circles. Stories have soooo many functions in our lives – it’s how we share awe, how we share lessons we learned – both good and bad, it’s how we make sense of things that have happened to us, it’s how we let someone into our experiences and share our lives.  Now, while story comes super naturally to everyone, and you’ve been telling stories your whole life, understanding how to tell them effectively makes you more effective and powerful in your communication. Stay Tuned.

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                If you are a leader of a family, or a manager or leader at work, you need mad story skills. Story is the genre that everyone understands – you get a much better response when you share an idea or an expectation through a story that illustrates the example, rather than an explanation or a demand. Try it. But first, we’ll get a few tips from Matt so that you can rock it!

                Matt Garner is from Longboard PR. He is a retired US Army Lieutenant Colonel who started his PR company when he retired.  His company helps companies and individuals increase their business by helping them understand their audience and how to send the message most effectively to that audience. Matt is a master storyteller, speaker and trainer, and he’s here to share his Wisdom.

                 

                To contact Matt:

                (801) 786-9383

                matt@longboardpr.com

                 

                 

                 

                ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1769Wed, 14 Jun 2017 09:00:42 -070019:05falsefullMatt Garner, CEO of Longboard PR and public speaker, specializes in helping people understand how to connect with their audience, and he's a real fan of story. Tune in for his 5 tips on what you must make your audience do to connect with them through story.Lori LeeEpisode 038 You Must Be Present to Win – Sensual LivingYou Must Be Present to Win – Sensual Living

                May Swenson said, “Not to be fully aroused to the potentialities of one’s senses means to walk the flat ground of appearances.” What this means is You Must Be Present to Win. Stay with us today for some thoughts on using your senses to bring the richness out of your story. The best and most interesting stories are full of rich detail. Not only is this an important technique in writing in order to take your reader where you want them to go and to help them recreate the scene in their own minds, it becomes an important part of living your own story – being fully present and aware within your own life, being in the present is required to take home the prize.

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                There is always the fine print on the bottom of the ticket that tells you that if you wander off before the drawing for the K2 skies, the facial, or the trip to Costa Rica, the loot will not fall into your hot little hands.

                Years ago I had a large wooden sign – I mean big – it was six-feet long, and it read “You Must Be Present To Win.” I hung it proudly on my dining room wall. There were a variety of interpretations, but my reason for having it there was to remind me that every moment that my mind was not fully attentive to the present experience – the smell of my son as he sat on my lap so I could read him a book, the tightness of my arms paddling across Tony Grove lake in my canoe, the feel of the breeze across my skin as I speed down a mountain path on my bike, the brilliant intricacy of a flower when I look at it in detail – every time I let those details go unnoticed I lose. I lose the opportunity to take with me what that experience offers. I lose the opportunity to be most fully alive. I skim the waters of living instead of getting deep and real.

                Our senses – sight, smell, touch, taste, hearing and I add intuition – these are the filters through which we get to interpret the world. Our senses help us connect with what surrounds us. There is a great deal of brain that is dedicated to our senses. This relationship between our senses and our brains is subjective – for example, it’s been proven that to some people cilantro tastes like a delicious herb, and to others it has a soapy flavor. The receptors in our taste buds work differently for different people, and though it’s only been in the last 30 years that scientists have figured out how smell works, it is scientifically proven that everyone smells things differently. Sight takes up a large portion of the brain, but what we see and how we see it is often influenced by our fears, our stories, our perspectives. Our senses are our link with the world around us. But when we go on auto-pilot, there is an awful lot that goes on that we miss because we aren’t paying attention. This is where the richness is found or lost. This is where you win or lose the prize.

                A few months ago I was in a group coaching meeting where a woman confessed that her life was good, she wasn’t having any problems, except that because things were running smoothly she was bored and felt life didn’t hold very much for her at the moment. Dulled and complacent she was numb. There is definitely a space in life where we are so used to stimulation, that without chaos or something extraordinary to get our chemicals flowing life feels dull, uncolorful, muted. This is not the only time we have proof of not using our senses. It also happens when we are moving so fast that we can’t take time to notice what’s going on...]]>You Must Be Present to Win – Sensual Living

                May Swenson said, “Not to be fully aroused to the potentialities of one’s senses means to walk the flat ground of appearances.” What this means is You Must Be Present to Win. Stay with us today for some thoughts on using your senses to bring the richness out of your story. The best and most interesting stories are full of rich detail. Not only is this an important technique in writing in order to take your reader where you want them to go and to help them recreate the scene in their own minds, it becomes an important part of living your own story – being fully present and aware within your own life, being in the present is required to take home the prize.

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                There is always the fine print on the bottom of the ticket that tells you that if you wander off before the drawing for the K2 skies, the facial, or the trip to Costa Rica, the loot will not fall into your hot little hands.

                Years ago I had a large wooden sign – I mean big – it was six-feet long, and it read “You Must Be Present To Win.” I hung it proudly on my dining room wall. There were a variety of interpretations, but my reason for having it there was to remind me that every moment that my mind was not fully attentive to the present experience – the smell of my son as he sat on my lap so I could read him a book, the tightness of my arms paddling across Tony Grove lake in my canoe, the feel of the breeze across my skin as I speed down a mountain path on my bike, the brilliant intricacy of a flower when I look at it in detail – every time I let those details go unnoticed I lose. I lose the opportunity to take with me what that experience offers. I lose the opportunity to be most fully alive. I skim the waters of living instead of getting deep and real.

                Our senses – sight, smell, touch, taste, hearing and I add intuition – these are the filters through which we get to interpret the world. Our senses help us connect with what surrounds us. There is a great deal of brain that is dedicated to our senses. This relationship between our senses and our brains is subjective – for example, it’s been proven that to some people cilantro tastes like a delicious herb, and to others it has a soapy flavor. The receptors in our taste buds work differently for different people, and though it’s only been in the last 30 years that scientists have figured out how smell works, it is scientifically proven that everyone smells things differently. Sight takes up a large portion of the brain, but what we see and how we see it is often influenced by our fears, our stories, our perspectives. Our senses are our link with the world around us. But when we go on auto-pilot, there is an awful lot that goes on that we miss because we aren’t paying attention. This is where the richness is found or lost. This is where you win or lose the prize.

                A few months ago I was in a group coaching meeting where a woman confessed that her life was good, she wasn’t having any problems, except that because things were running smoothly she was bored and felt life didn’t hold very much for her at the moment. Dulled and complacent she was numb. There is definitely a space in life where we are so used to stimulation, that without chaos or something extraordinary to get our chemicals flowing life feels dull, uncolorful, muted. This is not the only time we have proof of not using our senses. It also happens when we are moving so fast that we can’t take time to notice what’s going on around us. These are the moments when we are losing the now. These are the moments when we need to check in and actively get back in touch with the vividness of the colors around us, with the way the air feels on our skin or the background noises we’ve blocked out. These are the moments that we get to take a deep breath, breathe in and notice what there is to notice, or look deeply into a friend’s eyes, or hold someone’s hand and feel a moment of gratitude because you can see, feel, hear, smell, taste whatever is around you.

                When I guide outdoor adventures I almost always stop my clients and we listen for a moment – actively. Sometimes we hear the leaves rustling in the wind, sometimes the buzz of insects in the air, sometimes a stream, sometimes the birds or something rustling in the undergrowth and sometimes cars on the road below. Sometimes we hear a plane overhead. I always encourage them to reach out and touch the trees – to feel the texture of the bark. Is it papery? Peeling? Thick and jagged? What about running your hands across the grasses or reaching out to feel the petals of a flower, their perfect softness. Or even a thorn. “Breathe deep,” I tell them. What do you smell? Can you smell the pine trees? And of course, please stop for a moment and look around you – see, really see the colors. There is a whole palette of greens, browns, blues and of course, depending upon where you are, any other number of colors. I do this exercise with them because more often than not when we hike, and even when we just live our lives, we are pushing against time. We have an end result, a destination, something to check off a list, a place to be, a thing to get done, and we focus so closely on that end result or our mind is caught up in some worry that the details go unnoticed. If we’ve forgotten how to engage with the sensory aspect of life we miss the sensual details along the way – the stuff that adds the actual depth to living.

                On a late night hike in the Tetons, moving through the moon soaked dark, I met with a herd of bolting elk. They came out of nowhere their chosen trail no more than ten yards in front of me and I couldn’t see any of the. Stampeding through the Wyoming night their shadow shapes pounded past my eyes. I froze in amazement when I should have ran. I was on the edge of fear at the closeness, but their power was a magnet. In the dark I was only able to hear the force of their movements as they vaulted a fence that stood in their way. I felt the vibration of the ground as their hooves pummeled it. I could see the outline of their bodies in motion, just barely, but most potent was their smell: the smell of raw elk, of sweat, of wild animal. It held me captive in the moment, mesmerized; then they were gone. After they passed I stood taking deep breaths, trying to keep that smell: the smell of that powerful fleeting experience, of the wildness of elk. I stared hard through the darkness after them.

                Matthew Fox said that the opposite of awe is taking it all for granted. He thinks we have taken too much for granted for too long. It’s why we’re bored, and we’re violent, and we don’t have reverence, and therefore a sense of the sacred toward the soil and water and the air. It may also be why we do not hold a sense of the sacred for the other beautiful every-day gifts in our lives. The smell of a delicious dinner. The green of the trees pressed against a summer blue sky. The way the water bounces off your skin in the shower. The joy of your favorite song, or the call of your child’s voice. A hug – the pressure of another’s body close and sharing. The wet kiss of your dog and the affection behind it. Looking deeply into someone’s eyes. Having someone’s hand to hold. The smell of a really wonderful soap. Your very favorite drink. The air on your skin. The beauty of your child just as they are. A flower – it’s brilliant and beautiful design. A kiss that means something. Your feet in the warm sand. The perfect song. A tender mercy.

                Live a sensual life talking in all the detailed minutiae, and all of the sudden everything will have much deeper meaning. The world starts to come alive again, and gratitude for the small and simple springs up like a small plant in the fertile ground. Sometimes we overlook the little graces and beautiful details looking for some type of bigger sense of satisfaction. Looking for the big rush, the thrill. I know I have been guilty of this. Often still am. But perhaps that is where we most often miss the greatest depth. Every moment you are brave. Being present, without letting your mind wander to other things brings us happiness and this is something we can actually tie to scientific data.

                Matt Killingsworth, on the TedX stage at Cambridge, shared his scientific research into happiness. Research into happiness has taken many forms over the years, but one thing that could never be done was the moment to moment monitoring of the details of what made people happy. Killingsworth designed an iPhone app – Track Your Happiness– that allows him to question people, via text, at random moments during their day with a list of questions that rate their happiness and what they are doing. He’s had over 650K real time reports over 15,000 people, all diverse demographically, and he’s found that we are least happy when we allow our minds to wander away from the present moment. He’s got all the data on how often that happens, and he’s looked thoroughly into the issue, but I’ll summarize it for you – NO MATTER WHAT WE ARE DOING, even if it’s something we hate, like commuting or hanging out with in-laws we are less happy if we are not present to the moment.

                Ted Talk: Want to be happier – Stay in the moment: https://www.ted.com/talks/matt_killingsworth_want_to_be_happier_stay_in_the_moment

                Matt found that people are less happy when they are not present because when our minds wander they wander into our fears, into our worries, our regrets, and our negative voices.

                Now, this is fascinating because we know that fears are self-generated. We know that worrying about something does not change the outcome, but it does make us miserable, and we know that those negative one-liners (as we discussed in episode 6) are absolutely something we are trying to replace. And, it appears that a tool to happiness and to weeding out these things that are such a force within us for crippling our very existence can be pushed to the side by being present! Ha!! If you and I stay present, sensually aware of the things we are experiencing right now – the only time we have any control in anyway—we experience life more fully with a greater depth and richness, AND we will be happier! Scientifically proven.

                Henry David Thoreau recorded in his journal, on January 6, 1858, the following: “…very little evidence of God or man did I see just then and life not as rich and inviting an enterprise as it should be, when my attention was caught by a snowflake on my coat sleeve. It was one of those perfect, crystalline, star-shaped ones, six-rayed, like a flat wheel with six spokes, only the spokes were perfect little pine trees in shape, arranged around a central spangle. This little object, which, with many of its fellows, rested unmelted on my coat, so perfect and beautiful, reminded me that nature had not lost her pristine vigor yet, and why should man lose heart? Sometimes the pines were worn and had lost their branches…these little wheels came down like the wrecks of chariots from a battle waged in the sky…we are rained and snowed on with gems.”

                I recorded in my journal in 2008, during a backpacking yoga trip in Needles District in Canyonlands National Park, “There is silence in the desert that makes me want to shake my head just to hear something rattle. The wind stirs the junipers, but other than that the land sits vast and quiet as if we are in a void. I wonder as I sit atop a rock, how do you tell someone in the city about real silence? A void where your ears actually ring because they can’t pick up another sound and your primary sense becomes visual with the textures and colors– geologic journaling in orange, caramel, cream, and chocolate. Cliff bands, pillars, hoodoos, mushroom rocks, caves, and arches become the whole world in rumpled, smooth, shadow and color. And, the silence, when broken, is the swoosh of a raven wing, so loud it’s a big dog panting somewhere near, the wind hustling the leaves and nothing else.”

                These are the moment of people who stopped, for a moment and tuned into their senses, into the present exactly where it was, exactly what it was. These are the moment of epiphany and connection. These are the moments we can have all the time.

                I share these ideas with you today because as you write/live your life story I want to remind you that you have SOOO much control over the brilliance, the feelings, the scene, the experience. This is one of the story writing skills that takes lots of practice – always pulling yourself present. It’s why when you meditate you are supposed to pay attention to your breathing because it pulls you to the present. Right now, take a second and check in with every one of your senses. What do you see? What do you smell? What do you hear? What do you sense? What can you feel against your skin – pressure, fabric, cold, hot? What do you taste? Your challenge this week is to come back to this – to get present, as often as you can. Because we all want to win, and you must be present to win!

                Have a great week out there tuning in to your surroundings. Making your story richer and deeper because you are paying attention. Enjoy the depth and breadth and please go to www.loveyourstorypodcast and share one of your experiences. Also, don’t forget that we have the free mini e-book for you on the website—5 Steps to Reframing the Parts of Your Story that Feel Broken. See you next week and don’t forget to share this podcast with someone today.

                 

                ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1755Wed, 07 Jun 2017 09:00:22 -070017:01falsefullMay Swenson said, “Not to be fully aroused to the potentialities of one’s senses means to walk the flat ground of appearances.” What this means is You Must Be Present to Win. Stay with us today for some thoughts on using your senses to bring the richness out of your story. The best and most interesting stories are full of rich detail. Not only is this an important technique in writing in order to take your reader where you want them to go and to help them recreate the scene in their own minds, it becomes an important part of living your own story – being fully present and aware within your own life, being in the present is required to take home the prize.Lori LeeEpisode 037 Interview with Courtney Zollinger – How I Recovered from Binge Eating DisorderBinge Eating Disorder – Interview with Courtney Zollinger

                Courtney Zollinger is the author of the Snatching Sunshine blog. She began the blog to help others understand Binge Eating Disorder and to share her story in overcoming. Living in Rocklin, California Courtney is a wife and mother of a beautiful 2-year-old girl. Courtney has Bing eating disorder and has learned how to overcome. She wants to raise awareness of BED because it’s a common disorder that isn’t often discussed. On today’s podcast we hear her story, how she discovered what she had, and tools she found to help her get it under control.

                You can find more of her story on www.snatchingsunshine.com and Snatching Sunshine on Pinterest.

                ]]>Binge Eating Disorder – Interview with Courtney Zollinger

                Courtney Zollinger is the author of the Snatching Sunshine blog. She began the blog to help others understand Binge Eating Disorder and to share her story in overcoming. Living in Rocklin, California Courtney is a wife and mother of a beautiful 2-year-old girl. Courtney has Bing eating disorder and has learned how to overcome. She wants to raise awareness of BED because it’s a common disorder that isn’t often discussed. On today’s podcast we hear her story, how she discovered what she had, and tools she found to help her get it under control.

                You can find more of her story on www.snatchingsunshine.com and Snatching Sunshine on Pinterest.

                ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1747Wed, 31 May 2017 09:00:19 -070025:55falsefullCourtney Zollinger is the author of the Snatching Sunshine blog. She began the blog to help others understand Binge Eating Disorder and to share her story in overcoming. Living in Rocklin, California Courtney is a wife and mother of a beautiful 2-year-old girl. Courtney has Bing eating disorder and has learned how to overcome. She wants to raise awareness of BED because it's a common disorder that isn't often discussed. On today's podcast we hear her story, how she discovered what she had, and tools she found to help her get it under control.Lori LeeEpisode 036 Tips and Techniques for Better StorytellingTips and Techniques for Better Storytelling

                I was speaking at a business event the other day and afterward someone said, “I’d love to have some tips that I could work on, so I can tell better stories. Do you have a newsletter you can send me?” I told him about the weekly inspirational thought that you can sign up for on the website – and I totally suggest you all do that – it’s great to get an inspiration thought with a call to action each week, right in your Inbox box. But, I started thinking about his request for story tips – because that’s not what comes in the weekly inspiration.

                Why not do a whole podcast on story tips?  I thought. So, here it is – our first set of story-telling tips. Stay tuned for some tips and techniques for making your stories super effective – powerhouse stories – remember what we say—Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                When I was just starting out in real estate, and for years actually, I would present listing presentations with facts, figures, charts, and statistics. These are the things I thought people wanted to hear. When you are competing for a listing and you want to illustrate what you stand for, and you know you’ll be put up against the other competing agents, you’re going to say, “Of course I’m concerned with client connection and I’ll take your calls.” But, every agent is going to say that. What kind of different response do you think I get when instead I share an example of taking a client’s call at 10:00 pm to discuss a last-minute concern. Or when I tell a story about the time that I helped my client clean up his home when he was short on time in getting moved out? Points are scored and made when a potential client can see your claims in action by the stories you tell. It’s no longer just a statement or a stat – it’s sharing your work in action.

                This is just one example of hundreds that could be given. But the point is that there is no space in business where having a skill set that allows you to tell the right story in the right way isn’t going to be the most powerful play you can make. This is why these tools matter in the real world. So here we go – do you have your notebook ready?

                 

                1. Technique # 1 – Find your stories ahead of time so your quiver of stories is full. As a Realtor, I know the concerns of my clients and potential clients. They want to know that I can get them top dollar for their property, or negotiate the best possible deal on a purchase. They want to know that I will be honest with them. They need to trust that I know and understand the contracts and that I can protect them contractually throughout the negotiation process. They want to know that I’ll take their calls and that their best interest matters to me. Because I know these concerns, I can plan ahead and be prepared with stories that illustrate my values and performance in these areas. I’ve taken the time to dig for and pinpoint the experiences and stories that can help them get a good feel for how I do business and how I will take care of them. Do the same in your field of work. If you work for a non-profit and you are constantly talking to potential donors, have stories prepared that show their hard-earned dollars at work and the difference their money can make. Think about it ahead of time, plan and prepare. That’s what we do that makes us good. It is literally the quiver full of arrows that the hero will shoot to hit his/her mark.
                2. Technique # 2 – Get to the action....]]>Tips and Techniques for Better Storytelling

                   I was speaking at a business event the other day and afterward someone said, “I’d love to have some tips that I could work on, so I can tell better stories. Do you have a newsletter you can send me?” I told him about the weekly inspirational thought that you can sign up for on the website – and I totally suggest you all do that – it’s great to get an inspiration thought with a call to action each week, right in your Inbox box. But, I started thinking about his request for story tips – because that’s not what comes in the weekly inspiration.

                   Why not do a whole podcast on story tips?  I thought. So, here it is – our first set of story-telling tips. Stay tuned for some tips and techniques for making your stories super effective – powerhouse stories – remember what we say—Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   When I was just starting out in real estate, and for years actually, I would present listing presentations with facts, figures, charts, and statistics. These are the things I thought people wanted to hear. When you are competing for a listing and you want to illustrate what you stand for, and you know you’ll be put up against the other competing agents, you’re going to say, “Of course I’m concerned with client connection and I’ll take your calls.” But, every agent is going to say that. What kind of different response do you think I get when instead I share an example of taking a client’s call at 10:00 pm to discuss a last-minute concern. Or when I tell a story about the time that I helped my client clean up his home when he was short on time in getting moved out? Points are scored and made when a potential client can see your claims in action by the stories you tell. It’s no longer just a statement or a stat – it’s sharing your work in action.

                   This is just one example of hundreds that could be given. But the point is that there is no space in business where having a skill set that allows you to tell the right story in the right way isn’t going to be the most powerful play you can make. This is why these tools matter in the real world. So here we go – do you have your notebook ready?

                    

                   1. Technique # 1 – Find your stories ahead of time so your quiver of stories is full. As a Realtor, I know the concerns of my clients and potential clients. They want to know that I can get them top dollar for their property, or negotiate the best possible deal on a purchase. They want to know that I will be honest with them. They need to trust that I know and understand the contracts and that I can protect them contractually throughout the negotiation process. They want to know that I’ll take their calls and that their best interest matters to me. Because I know these concerns, I can plan ahead and be prepared with stories that illustrate my values and performance in these areas. I’ve taken the time to dig for and pinpoint the experiences and stories that can help them get a good feel for how I do business and how I will take care of them. Do the same in your field of work. If you work for a non-profit and you are constantly talking to potential donors, have stories prepared that show their hard-earned dollars at work and the difference their money can make. Think about it ahead of time, plan and prepare. That’s what we do that makes us good. It is literally the quiver full of arrows that the hero will shoot to hit his/her mark.
                   2. Technique # 2 – Get to the action. Once you’ve pinpointed the stories you want to use, don’t add on a preamble when you start to tell your story. The listener does not need a long explanation of where you’re trying to go. For instance, this might be a little long. “It’s great that you asked about whether or not we use environmentally safe products. I’m going to tell you something about that, this is a story we always share around the office….blah, blah, blah.
                   
                   

                    

                   Jump right into the action. Nothing loses the audience like dragging out a point. Jump into the story, imagine the scene, and go straight there. “So there I was…”  or  “there was a time, just last year we worked with the city to enhance the recycling program.” No preamble, no explanation, just take them to the scene where the action is going to happen.

                   3. Technique #3 – Don’t be afraid of vulnerability.
                   
                   

                   The stories we, as humans, connect most readily with, are those that draw out our emotion. Stories are vehicles for us to connect our emotional experiences with the characters in the story. How often when you watch a movie or read a book are you brought to tears or laughter because you are relating to the emotional spaces the characters are in? These are the places where you say, “I know what that feels like,” or you nod with certainty because the story has struck its mark.

                   To pull the emotion out of the story because you feel it will be unprofessional is to take the human factor out of the tale, and therein the tale loses its power. Emotion, vulnerability, realness – these are the spaces where we come to our own humanity, the spaces where we connect in real and lasting ways. Emotions like uncertainty, fear, anxiety, even moments that show you making mistakes, love, joy, exhilaration, these are all relatable spaces.

                   4. Technique #4 – Start with the HOOK. From journalism to advertisements, the first rule is always to start with the hook. We talked above about jumping right into the action. This is a hook technique, but the hook itself is that carefully crafted first line. That statement that instantly pulls the listener in so they engage with the tale you’re telling. “My voice was shaking from nerves.”  “Every time the phone rang I jumped.”  “After last week’s meeting, I’m not certain I’ll wear socks again.”  Whatever it is – start with the one-line hook that is going to get your listener waiting for the message you are sharing. The hook is a line that is so interesting and leaves something unanswered so you know the listener is going to want to see where it leads.
                   
                   

                   Once you find your stories, you can, with a little effort, craft your hooks.  Ok, our final tip for the day.

                   5. Technique #5 – Add the Details. Every good writer knows that without the details you just have a pile of bland facts that most often fail to take anyone away from the spot they are sitting or standing. On the other hand, details create a scene for the listener to escape into. The frayed edge of the rug, the bright gold buttons, the smell of the pine trees and the sun reflecting off the dappled ripples in the stream. These are the details that build a scene and help transport the listener. Some tips here – look for sensory information – how things looked, smelled, felt, what you could hear. What about motion – can you add in something about the jostling as you ran up the stairs, or the way Bill slammed on the brakes or the way the tires squealed. Don’t be afraid to share the details of how things unfolded because these are the pieces that create the set for the story.
                   
                   

                   So that’s it for today fellow storytellers. Five tips to work into your stories. Find the stories that you want to have ready to share in your conversations. Prep your hook and jump right into the action. Don’t be afraid to share and create the emotion involved in the story, and then bring in all the glorious details so your listeners are transported to the place you want to take them.

                   The next step – test out your stories. Take notes on the responses you get, and if necessary, adjust it again to make it even stronger.

                   If you have ideas or thoughts on story that you’d like to hear about, go to the Contact Us page and chime in. Have a great week out there working up your best stories with these new story tips and we’ll see you next Wednesday. Please share the podcast with your friends and fam. You can listen on www.loveyourstorypodcast.com or wherever you get your podcasts.

                    

                    

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1741Wed, 24 May 2017 09:00:10 -070010:10falsefullTips and Techniques for Better Storytelling I was speaking at a business event the other day and afterward someone said, “I’d love to have some tips that I could work on, so I can tell better stories. Do you have a newsletter you can send me?” I told him about the weekly inspirational thought that…Lori LeeEpisode 035 Interview with Ryan Clarkin – Business and Mindset CoachChoosing Your Perspective on Purpose – Interview with Ryan Clarkin

                   Welcome back to the  Love Your Story Podcast Interview Land! Drumroll!

                   Choosing your perspective in every situation is a concept that frankly blows the lid off of life as we know it because it gives us complete control over our realities. While to some this is an exciting idea, to others it’s WAY too much responsibility.  I don’t always do this particularly well, but sometimes I do, and when I do it’s amazing the wonders it works in creating my perspective, and my life.  So today, stay tuned to talk with Ryan Clarkin, a life coach who specializes in this very thing. Let’s figure out how to do it.

                   Ralph Marston said, “What limits you is not the way things are. What limits you is the perspective you choose to see the way things are.”

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Ryan Clarkin is a business and mindset coach for entrepreneurs who are ready to live a life of their design. He specializes in creating a clear vision, mastering interpretations, and how to instantly change your life through changing your interpretations.

                   So, welcome Ryan! Let’s talk about how we can create better, happier stories by choosing our own perspective.

                   To get ahold of Ryan you can find him on social media:

                   Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ryan.clarkin1
                   YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCJuxhoe_UzSpBlw71fYzJiQ
                   Instagram: instagram.com/ryanclarkin
                   – Creating a clear vision
                   – Mastering interpretations
                   – The Mind-Map (your layer of reality)
                   – How to instantly change your life through changing your interpretations
                   – The power of cause
                   – Vision + Belief + Action = Reality (The Lifestyle Design Equation)
                   ]]>Choosing Your Perspective on Purpose – Interview with Ryan Clarkin

                   Welcome back to the  Love Your Story Podcast Interview Land! Drumroll!

                   Choosing your perspective in every situation is a concept that frankly blows the lid off of life as we know it because it gives us complete control over our realities. While to some this is an exciting idea, to others it’s WAY too much responsibility.  I don’t always do this particularly well, but sometimes I do, and when I do it’s amazing the wonders it works in creating my perspective, and my life.  So today, stay tuned to talk with Ryan Clarkin, a life coach who specializes in this very thing. Let’s figure out how to do it.

                   Ralph Marston said, “What limits you is not the way things are. What limits you is the perspective you choose to see the way things are.”

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Ryan Clarkin is a business and mindset coach for entrepreneurs who are ready to live a life of their design. He specializes in creating a clear vision, mastering interpretations, and how to instantly change your life through changing your interpretations.

                   So, welcome Ryan! Let’s talk about how we can create better, happier stories by choosing our own perspective.

                   To get ahold of Ryan you can find him on social media:

                   Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ryan.clarkin1
                   YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCJuxhoe_UzSpBlw71fYzJiQ
                   Instagram: instagram.com/ryanclarkin
                   – Creating a clear vision
                   – Mastering interpretations
                   – The Mind-Map (your layer of reality)
                   – How to instantly change your life through changing your interpretations
                   – The power of cause
                   – Vision + Belief + Action = Reality (The Lifestyle Design Equation)
                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1737Wed, 17 May 2017 09:00:18 -070019:26falsefullChoosing your perspective in every situation is a concept that is sometimes hard to wrap your head around because it gives us complete control over our realities. While to some this is an exciting idea, to others it’s WAY too much responsibility. Join us today for my interview with Ryan Clarkin, a life coach that specializes in helping his clients choose their perspectives on purpose, because it DOES make all the difference.Lori LeeEpisode 034 Treasure HuntingTreasure Hunting

                   Elizabeth Gilbert said in her book, Big Magic,  “…you have treasures hidden within you –extraordinary treasures—and so do I, and so does everyone around us. And bringing those treasures to light takes work and faith and focus and courage and hours of devotion, and the clock is ticking, and the world is spinning, and we simply do not have time anymore to think so small.” Join us today for some treasure hunting – finding and sharing chests of gold and diamonds.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it

                   The inspiration for the title of today’s podcast comes from Elizabeth Gilbert’s book Big Magic. In the first few pages of her book she challenges the reader. She says, “Do you have the courage to bring forth the treasures that are hidden within you?” She is talking to creatives, people who write, act, dance, create. I proffer the same question to everyone. Within each of us are individual and unique talents, gifts and interests. I believe that our interests are the things we are meant to pursue. They are the compass that points us in the direction of our destiny. Which I’ve always considered great news because that means my destiny lies along a path I’m going to be interested in.

                   Gilbert says, “I don’t know what’s hidden within you. I have no way of knowing such a thing. You yourself may barely know, although I suspect you’ve caught glimpses. I don’t know your capacities, your aspirations, your longings, your secret talents. But surely something wonderful is sheltered inside you. I say this with all confidence because I happen to believe we are all walking repositories of buried treasure.”

                   Michael Strasner puts it another way. “Don’t rip the world off,” he says.  I attended a leadership conference that he facilitated. As he pushed for each of us to stretch our imaginations, our courage, and our commitment, he often came back to that idea…”Don’t rip the world off.”  You have gifts and beauty and incredible things to share with your tribe, your people, maybe even with the world on a larger scale, and now is not the time to play small.  “Life is now!” he often said. If not now, when will you start living brave, bold and giving what you have to give…telling the story you have to tell?

                   I have always been fascinated by the array and variety of talents and abilities that people have. It’s one of my favorite things– to come to recognize an individual’s gifts, and I get excited about what those gifts mean; how they bless the person and give them their own color and power; how they make the world more diverse, richer with kindness or music, art or insight, wisdom or poetry; how they bring something different than I bring, and how that makes my life richer, and the world richer because they are alive and in it. Getting to know a person is like unveiling a new work of art and getting to appreciate how much better the world is because Dan, Sara, or Amanda is in the world. And EVERYONE of us has our own, personal treasure. What is yours? How do you share it?

                   In the story, the Count of Monte Cristo, the main character is wrongly imprisoned and after years of solitary confinement eventually meets another man who is imprisoned and they share a secret escape route as they try to dig their way out of the forsaken prison where the lost are surrendered and forgotten. He and the man become friends, partners in their escape, and the older gentleman teaches him to read, teaches him history, and even teaches him fencing. Right before he dies of an...]]>Treasure Hunting

                   Elizabeth Gilbert said in her book, Big Magic,  “…you have treasures hidden within you –extraordinary treasures—and so do I, and so does everyone around us. And bringing those treasures to light takes work and faith and focus and courage and hours of devotion, and the clock is ticking, and the world is spinning, and we simply do not have time anymore to think so small.” Join us today for some treasure hunting – finding and sharing chests of gold and diamonds.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it

                   The inspiration for the title of today’s podcast comes from Elizabeth Gilbert’s book Big Magic. In the first few pages of her book she challenges the reader. She says, “Do you have the courage to bring forth the treasures that are hidden within you?” She is talking to creatives, people who write, act, dance, create. I proffer the same question to everyone. Within each of us are individual and unique talents, gifts and interests. I believe that our interests are the things we are meant to pursue. They are the compass that points us in the direction of our destiny. Which I’ve always considered great news because that means my destiny lies along a path I’m going to be interested in.

                   Gilbert says, “I don’t know what’s hidden within you. I have no way of knowing such a thing. You yourself may barely know, although I suspect you’ve caught glimpses. I don’t know your capacities, your aspirations, your longings, your secret talents. But surely something wonderful is sheltered inside you. I say this with all confidence because I happen to believe we are all walking repositories of buried treasure.”

                   Michael Strasner puts it another way. “Don’t rip the world off,” he says.  I attended a leadership conference that he facilitated. As he pushed for each of us to stretch our imaginations, our courage, and our commitment, he often came back to that idea…”Don’t rip the world off.”  You have gifts and beauty and incredible things to share with your tribe, your people, maybe even with the world on a larger scale, and now is not the time to play small.  “Life is now!” he often said. If not now, when will you start living brave, bold and giving what you have to give…telling the story you have to tell?

                   I have always been fascinated by the array and variety of talents and abilities that people have. It’s one of my favorite things– to come to recognize an individual’s gifts, and I get excited about what those gifts mean; how they bless the person and give them their own color and power; how they make the world more diverse, richer with kindness or music, art or insight, wisdom or poetry; how they bring something different than I bring, and how that makes my life richer, and the world richer because they are alive and in it. Getting to know a person is like unveiling a new work of art and getting to appreciate how much better the world is because Dan, Sara, or Amanda is in the world. And EVERYONE of us has our own, personal treasure. What is yours? How do you share it?

                   In the story, the Count of Monte Cristo, the main character is wrongly imprisoned and after years of solitary confinement eventually meets another man who is imprisoned and they share a secret escape route as they try to dig their way out of the forsaken prison where the lost are surrendered and forgotten. He and the man become friends, partners in their escape, and the older gentleman teaches him to read, teaches him history, and even teaches him fencing. Right before he dies of an accidental cave-in, he gives to Edmond a treasure map that he has always kept hidden. Through devious plight, Edmond makes a body switch with the dead man, and when the prison guards haul a body down the hill to throw into the seas, it is really Edmond. After his daring escape, he embarks on the journey of finding the hidden treasure. It’s a famed treasure that is known for its massive abundance, trunks and trunks of gold coins, diamonds, and other precious jewels. In order to find the treasure Edmond goes through many experiences, making alliances, securing a boat, a partner, and  of course, all the while he isn’t certain it will be there, or that he will find it, but he believes, he perseveres, he gets creative, and he fights his way forward – quite literally, with sword, gun, and pure intent. Eventually, his hard work pays off and he finds the incredible stash on the island of Monte Cristo, but even once he finds it he must dive into the caves below the island and pull the trunks up, hundreds of them, one at a time. He must then carry and cajole them all to safety. It is a herculean effort.  He buys the island of Monte Cristo and proceeds to unfold a life of adventure and daring revenge. It’s a great book, and movie, I highly recommend it, but I retell this cliff-note account to point out that our buried treasure isn’t just sitting on the front porch. Sometimes the greatest gifts are dug for, hungered after, developed and not given up on. While we certainly have natural gifts, things that come so easily to us that we are unaware they are not easy for everyone, we also have gifts that can be developed. Gifts and treasures of great value, if we’ll put the time and energy into finding them.

                   While I would guess that most know what they are good at, have an idea of the treasures within them, if you’d like to seek within yourself for the hidden treasures in your soul, dig a little deeper, ask yourself – What makes me feel alive? Is it painting? Is it reading to your children? Is it throwing a party? Is it a competition at the office? Is it Pinterest? What do other people really appreciate about me? Do you get compliments about being a good listener, being thoughtful, being a good friend, going the extra mile? What natural abilities do you bring to the table? Are you great at making people laugh, promoting the weekends activities with your energy, organizing your family?  Some of these things I’ve mentioned are things within ourselves that get taken for granted all the time. We look at the more obvious talents like singing, dancing, skiing, playing guitar – something that’s outward and obvious, while other fabulous and important skills that are perhaps less obvious get overlooked. In high school, I remember preparing for pageants and struggling with the talent portion because you can’t exactly shoot free-throws or ski down a stage. I ended up playing the xylophone because I was a percussionist and that was the most acceptable form of performance talent that I possessed. We do what we can, right?

                   There are three types of treasures – One’s we’ve buried, ones we’ve claimed, and ones we haven’t discovered yet. If we’ve buried your treasures that usually stems from self-doubt. One’s we’ve claimed we are aware of, proud of, and share them. The one’s we haven’t discovered may be either things we do so naturally that we aren’t even aware they are treasure because we assume that anyone can do them, and/or things you would be wonderful at with some digging and shining. There are possibly some in all three categories.

                   I have a friend who loves to sew. With her creations she not only creates her art, but she gifts others with beautiful bags, aprons, covered notebooks, and any other creations she decides to undertake. While she sews she teaches her daughter the trade, cultivating with her daughter talent and self-esteem. Just by focusing on this one talent she has developed she creates works of art, rejuvenates herself, blesses and teaches her daughter and shares her gifts with others, which blesses their lives when they have a fun apron, diaper bag, or journal from a dear friend.

                   I have another friend who is an occupational therapist by trade. She takes a couple weeks each year and travels to foreign countries on mini-missions with her church to bless those who do not have the money and resources to seek help in dealing with debilitating situations. In this two weeks she takes off to use her skill she shows her children by example what it means to serve and care for others; she lightens the burdens of the poor and sick; she finds her own reward within her service, and she keeps on top of her professional game.

                   Both of these women have many more talents than just the one I have mentioned, but you can see how much difference one can make with even just one talent. When you start unearthing all the treasures you have to offer and sharing them with the world, just think of the bounty.

                   Does it excite you to think of the joy in living fully focused on the things you are good at, celebrating your skills and sharing your gifts? I think it’s imperative to living well! It’s a must to be true to God who has blessed you with these gifts, it is a must to fulfill who you are in the greatest space of joy, and it is a must to live your best life and to impact those you can impact. Often when we are searching for our purpose in life, what we are really looking for is how we can best use our skills and our time to create a meaningful existence.

                   Let me share one of Rumi’s poems:

                   Keep walking, though there’s no place to get to.

                   Don’t try to see through the distances. That’s not for human beings.

                   Move within, but don’t move the way fear makes you move.

                   Today, like every other day, we wake up empty and frightened.

                   Don’t open the door to the study

                   and begin reading. Take down a musical instrument.

                   Let the beauty we love, be what we do.

                   There are hundreds of ways to kneel and kiss the ground.

                    

                   I love that poem, especially that last line. “There are hundreds of ways to kneel and kiss the ground.” There are hundreds of ways to write your story. There are hundreds of ways to be beautiful and let the beauty we love be what we do.

                   In Matthew 25 in the New Testament, there is the parable of the talents. In the parable, the master gives gifts of money, called talents, to his servants. He then leaves town and waits to see what the servants will do with the treasure he has given each of them. Some of them invest and develop what was given to them, for whom the master praises their wise stewardship upon his return, but one is afraid and buries his talent. The bible says that this man was chastised, and what the master originally gave him was taken away, while those who developed and created more with what they were given had more added unto them. While parables, by their very nature, have a variety of interpretations, I interpret this one to plainly state that God has given each of us treasure or gifts within ourselves. He then has left us on our own to see what we will do with what he has given us.

                   Are there any of you out there right now who are saying, “I don’t have any talents?” “I’m not good at anything?” “I’m not sure what my passion is.”  –I’ve heard that refrain plenty.  I want to quickly point out that those are the one-liner stories that we talked about in episode 06, and they don’t serve you. Get over it. If you need to do a little digging to find your buried treasure, that’s okay, to be expected, but I promise it’s there. Ask some of those closest to you what they most appreciate about you. What they feel like you are good at. You might be surprised at the answers you get.  I know I was when I tried it. I had to put up with my brothers laughing at me and saying I was fishing for compliments, but the responses were still really fascinating and unexpected. And remember that skills like listening, being a good friend, knowing how to make people laugh, how to organize a closet or bring people together. These are talents and skills that DO NOT get to be overlooked because they aren’t featured on American’s Got Talent. These are the skills, and others like them, that make all the difference in creating a beautiful world. Silence any voice in your head that tells a story of doubt regarding the treasures within you. It simply is impossible. No one is here without gifts and talents to share and develop. Noone. Choose to cultivate stories in your head that support you in discovering, accepting and celebrating your own beauty and treasure. This is where you hop bravely in the boat, put out to sea, pirates be damned. We choose the narratives we allow to play. Choose one that supports you and all the original beauty that resides in you, or you rip yourself off.

                   A story is never as good unless there is a cast of characters who are diverse and interesting. Embrace your diversity. Embrace the treasure that is yours. Don’t wish for someone else’s. Dive into the water and pull up those chests of gold and share with the world every beautiful piece you have to offer. Don’t rip the world off either, because the other option is to leave all your buried treasure, down there, buried, untouched. Are you brave enough for the adventure of finding all the gold and jewels inside of you? Of course, you are…

                   This week’s challenge is to identify a treasure within you, and then to really focus on it. Remind yourself each morning, as you look in the mirror, how awesome you are because of let say, you are one organized son of a gun. Find a way to use and share it, because you can.

                   Share this podcast with a friend so everyone starts digging for those buried treasure and sharing with each other. Make the world richer. See you next week on the Love Your Story podcast. Please go to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and sign up for our weekly inspirational thought!

                   
                   

                    

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1734Wed, 10 May 2017 09:00:28 -070015:36falsefullElizabeth Gilbert said in her book, Big Magic, “…you have treasures hidden within you –extraordinary treasures—and so do I, and so does everyone around us. And bringing those treasures to light takes work and faith and focus and courage and hours of devotion, and the clock is ticking, and the world is spinning, and we simply do not have time anymore to think so small.” Join us today for some treasure hunting – finding and sharing chests of gold and diamonds.Lori LeeEpisode 033 BUSINESS – Using Story to Discover and Define Company CultureEpisode 033 – A Business Episode – Using Story to Discover and Define Company Culture

                   Scenario #1

                   John sat at his desk, shuffling papers back and forth.  He’d recently taken over the marketing of his mortgage company and he was trying to figure out what he was doing wrong. He posted on FB, Instagram, Twitter, all the spaces they felt they could reach their customers, but they weren’t getting much response. How could he improve interaction with his potential clients?

                   Scenario #2

                   Jillian had just been promoted to head of a sales team. She knew that each team was like a family here at ABC and she was now the new leader. How was she going to set up her team dynamic? How was she going to create camaraderie, action, and a highly motivated team?

                   Scenario #3

                   The Bright and Shiny window company had been around for twenty years. They were well established and had their way of doing things. Now suddenly, when they needed to hire new people they were being asked about company culture. What in the hell is company culture? And why should we care?

                   I. What is company culture?

                   Company culture forms, if not purposefully, then organically, by the values (do you value innovation?), management styles (perform or die; Open door support, family style), attitudes and energies of the employees and the perks and benefits that create loyalty, fun, and buy-in with your employees. This culture defines the often unwritten but very real rules of behavior.

                   How do your employees act when you are not around? What do they expect from the company? Do your employees and your clients feel connected and loyal? Do your programs create space for innovation or are your people highly regulated? Do you provide extra programs like a gym membership or monthly family get together to build relationships of loyalty with your employees or clients? Does your company become a part of the employees or clients story and make that connection? What does the company expect, value and reward from its employees? What will the company provide, incentivize and tolerate?  The answers to these questions can easily outline the company culture.

                   There is an interesting article in Entrepreneur magazine, from last year, 10 examples of companies with fantastic culture. I want to share this with you because it provides real life examples of what defined and successful company cultures look like. Then, I’d love for you to share with the group what you feel your company culture is…good or bad, undefined, or well defined.

                   ^{https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/249174}

                    

                   II.WHY CREATE IT ON PURPOSE?

                   Company culture has always been around, it’s unavoidable, but it’s only been in recent history that successful companies have started to create it on purpose.

                   Why? For a number of reasons

                   1. The new millennial workforce (70%) is as concerned with company culture as they are with pay and benefits. Working with a company that has similar values and in which they feel they are a valuable part of the family in which they become a part of the company story builds loyalty and longevity in a group that frankly isn’t known for either. Does it make their story look good?
                   2. It’s the future. The speed at which business ideas and platform are changing is difficult to keep up with. Air BNB, Uber, Periscope, Google, Zappos, Twitter…these companies that are thriving are paying very close attention to company culture. It’s an important new aspect of doing business. And certainly, one that is working.
                   3. Why leave something so important to chance? It’s going to be there, you might as well create it with purpose because it affects your reputation, your customer and employee loyalty, your retention of employees, your bottom line.
                   
                   

                    

                   III.  How does story align as a tool for...]]>Episode 033 – A Business Episode – Using Story to Discover and Define Company Culture

                   Scenario #1

                   John sat at his desk, shuffling papers back and forth.  He’d recently taken over the marketing of his mortgage company and he was trying to figure out what he was doing wrong. He posted on FB, Instagram, Twitter, all the spaces they felt they could reach their customers, but they weren’t getting much response. How could he improve interaction with his potential clients?

                   Scenario #2

                   Jillian had just been promoted to head of a sales team. She knew that each team was like a family here at ABC and she was now the new leader. How was she going to set up her team dynamic? How was she going to create camaraderie, action, and a highly motivated team?

                   Scenario #3

                   The Bright and Shiny window company had been around for twenty years. They were well established and had their way of doing things. Now suddenly, when they needed to hire new people they were being asked about company culture. What in the hell is company culture? And why should we care?

                   I. What is company culture?

                   Company culture forms, if not purposefully, then organically, by the values (do you value innovation?), management styles (perform or die; Open door support, family style), attitudes and energies of the employees and the perks and benefits that create loyalty, fun, and buy-in with your employees. This culture defines the often unwritten but very real rules of behavior.

                   How do your employees act when you are not around? What do they expect from the company? Do your employees and your clients feel connected and loyal? Do your programs create space for innovation or are your people highly regulated? Do you provide extra programs like a gym membership or monthly family get together to build relationships of loyalty with your employees or clients? Does your company become a part of the employees or clients story and make that connection? What does the company expect, value and reward from its employees? What will the company provide, incentivize and tolerate?  The answers to these questions can easily outline the company culture.

                   There is an interesting article in Entrepreneur magazine, from last year, 10 examples of companies with fantastic culture. I want to share this with you because it provides real life examples of what defined and successful company cultures look like. Then, I’d love for you to share with the group what you feel your company culture is…good or bad, undefined, or well defined.

                   ^{https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/249174}

                    

                   II.WHY CREATE IT ON PURPOSE?

                   Company culture has always been around, it’s unavoidable, but it’s only been in recent history that successful companies have started to create it on purpose.

                   Why? For a number of reasons

                   1. The new millennial workforce (70%) is as concerned with company culture as they are with pay and benefits. Working with a company that has similar values and in which they feel they are a valuable part of the family in which they become a part of the company story builds loyalty and longevity in a group that frankly isn’t known for either. Does it make their story look good?
                   2. It’s the future. The speed at which business ideas and platform are changing is difficult to keep up with. Air BNB, Uber, Periscope, Google, Zappos, Twitter…these companies that are thriving are paying very close attention to company culture. It’s an important new aspect of doing business. And certainly, one that is working.
                   3. Why leave something so important to chance? It’s going to be there, you might as well create it with purpose because it affects your reputation, your customer and employee loyalty, your retention of employees, your bottom line.
                   
                   

                    

                   III.  How does story align as a tool for company culture development and why would you want to use it?

                   1. Story is the genre that every human being, regardless of culture, class, nationality, or even slot in history, has always understood.
                   
                   

                   The human mind will engage and stay engaged with a story far more easily and for far longer than any other form of communication. In addition, story gives us a framework for remembering the information longer. We become communities through shared experience.  Story has the mysterious capacity to connect, engage, and bring people together.  Stories build rapport. Stories show how you overcame something difficult, or they demonstrate how we screwed up and they become a warning. Stories are the brain’s most effortless path for parsing information so people will pay attention to them. They are the most potent force for engagement.  The real question would be why WOULDN’T you use story as a tool in business. When you know how to use it you have real power at your fingertips.

                   2. Versatile Power

                   These stories are powerful ways to show employees what you expect of them. They are marketing tools to show clients what you stand for and why they should use you. They can be used to get management and investors in-line with your vision and where you are going – all with your own powerful stories. All of these play a role in your culture.

                   3. Modern Social Media is all about communicating your story.

                    

                   VI. Lets start with Identity Stories or Origin Stories

                   Ask yourself –  What does it mean to be us?

                   This is a question answered every time an American sings the story of the Star Spangled Banner. Every time the Jews retell the story of the Exodus. This is a story that defines for you, for your company, for your employees, for your clients, where you came from and why that matters to them.

                   What was the beginning of your team or business? What was true at the beginning of the organization that is still true today?

                   This is the origin story from General Electric:

                   GE:

                   “The year was 1876, America’s centennial. It was also the year that Thomas Alva Edison opened a laboratory in Menlo Park, New Jersey. Out of that laboratory came the greatest invention of the age — a successful incandescent electric lamp (a light bulb). After a merger in 1892, he called his new organization General Electric. Today, that same spirit of innovation and discovery is still a part of everything we do.”

                   Starbucks:

                   Once Upon A Time there were three students at the University of SanFrancisco who became friends. One became an English teacher, one a history teacher, and one a writer.  In 1971 they met a man named Alfred Peet, who showed them his special coffee roasting technique, and the three decided to start a company that sold high-quality coffee beans and equipment. They named their company after the first mate in the book Moby Dick and they threw their fortunes in together for better or for worse because they found a quality product.  That’s what we are about – that’s what we’ve always been about – quality coffee.

                   Rieger & Co., a Kansas City distillery

                   Largely known for its trademark Monogram whiskey, Rieger was founded in 1887 and this company was a huge part of local Kansas City culture; the Rieger family even built an impressive hotel that was famous for being one of Al Capone’s regular haunts. The Rieger company’s success continued until Prohibition caused them to close their doors in 1919. In 2014, nearly a century after the business was forced to close, one of J. Rieger’s descendants revitalized the business. Kansas City residents greeted the new distillery with enthusiasm, a great part of Kansas City’s history was restored.

                   Now, the whiskey company aligns its modern brand to the city’s history by showcasing a timeline on the website with photos of the artifacts from the original business. Being rooted in local history and culture gives the J. Rieger name a unique kind of credibility with local residents, and the Prohibition-era origin story creates a mystique that’s almost irresistible to consumers.

                   What is your origin story and how can it be used to help define what you’re about? When you share it in sales meetings your employees gain understanding of where the company comes from, what it expects, and it gives them roots, in a way, with the company, as the employee becomes part of the story.

                    

                   VALUE STORIES

                   What does your team value? Are you a team that focuses on quality? On customer service? On speed of the deal? On hassle free? On value for your client? On the newest technologies?  To keep these values from ringing hollow in your ears and your client’s ears – to keep there from being a disconnect between your stated values and your actual values, have a story or stories to back them up. These are the “how” stories of your team. These are the stories that set behavioral boundaries for people on your team.

                   Examples: (Listen for the details)

                   1. Etsy
                   2. Zappos
                   3. Food Manufacturing
                   4. Management Style
                   5. TOMS
                   6. Les Schwab Video
                   
                   

                    

                   These were stories that could be used, instead of graphs, charts and propaganda, to show, not tell, what the company stands for to employees and customers.

                   VISION STORIES

                   Vision:  Where are YOU going? Typically this comes in something like a vision statement, but to truly invite people (usually your team or investors) into your vision it’s even better to use a story.

                   WORLD BANK example:

                   In June 1995, a health worker in a tiny town in Zambia logged on to a website for the Centers for Disease Control in Atlanta, Georgia, and got an answer to a question on how to treat malaria…This was in Zambia, one of the poorest countries in the world. The health worker used this advanced research, thousands of miles away, to save lives.

                   The most important part of this story for us in the World Bank is this: The World Bank doesn’t have its know-how accessible to all the millions of people who make decisions about poverty and money making across the world. But just imagine if we did. Think what an organization we could become, think of the growth, think of the influence.

                   Tools: How to create Vision Stories

                   1. Comparison: a – This is where we are b – This is where we want to be
                   2. Or, make up a future story of what your company looks like in 1 year, in 5 years…however far out your vision is.
                      1. What does your company look like in 5 years?
                      2. What are your customers saying about you?
                      3. What growth have you seen?
                      4. What is your competition saying about you?
                      5. What looks different?
                      
                      
                   
                   

                   Share this vision story often, so that everyone is working to create the same thing!

                   The combination of these types of stories – Origin, values and vision stories can be the means, the building blocks, for defining, building and sharing your company culture with your employees and management, as well as with your clients or customers.

                   BONUS:

                   What does this look like? How do you utilize these stories in real life management?

                   1. Find them
                   2. Use them in sales meetings to show (not tell) employees what’s expected.
                   3. Use them in management meetings to illustrate what is expected of them, to define what the company stands for, to share your vision of where you’re going. To get everyone on the same page.
                   4. Use them in your marketing campaigns to show your clients what you’re about.
                   5. Use them on your websites and in video, social media, to define your values, to highlight your customers, and to sell your products.
                   6. Have a set of stories available that show your company culture in action. When Mel, or someone else you’re hiring or working with asks about your company culture you can paint a vivid, strong picture by sharing the stories that show what you where you’re from, what you stand for, and how your employees and management interact
                   
                   

                    

                   So, get excited, start digging through the stories that have accumulated while you’ve done business – stories of successes, stories of failures, stories that show your values, and you can even start recording new stories as they happen, deciding later how you might use them – starting a story repository. Our stories are powerful tools that we can learn to work with the many other pieces of running a successful business.

                   And, if any of you are sitting there saying, wow – I don’t know where to start, I wish someone could help me figure out my stories and how to use them, I’m happy to work with you on a consulting basis.

                   *Some stories and concepts taken from David Hutchins book – The Circle of the 9 Muses

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1697Wed, 03 May 2017 09:00:37 -070019:46falsefullThe combination of these types of stories – Origin, values and vision stories can be the means, the building blocks, for defining, building and sharing your company culture with your employees and management, as well as with your clients or customers. Listen in to understand more about company culture, why you want to define it on purpose, and why story is the perfect tool to help you do that.Lori LeeEpisode 032 Interview with Adam Chase – Lawyer, Editor, AthleteAdam Chase lives in Boulder, Colorado. He is a professional trail runner, a professional snowshoe racer, a writer, a tax lawyer, an editor, an adventure racer, a mentor, a father, a husband, a brand ambassador, and the President of the American Trail Running Association. He talks to us about how he dealt with the toughest times in his 20’s, 30’s and 40’s, and how we can choose to find the best perspective possible in our story.

                   To contact Adam:

                   www.trailrunner.com

                   #timetoplay

                   Chase@hbcboulder.com

                   ]]>Adam Chase lives in Boulder, Colorado. He is a professional trail runner, a professional snowshoe racer, a writer, a tax lawyer, an editor, an adventure racer, a mentor, a father, a husband, a brand ambassador, and the President of the American Trail Running Association. He talks to us about how he dealt with the toughest times in his 20’s, 30’s and 40’s, and how we can choose to find the best perspective possible in our story.

                   To contact Adam:

                   www.trailrunner.com

                   #timetoplay

                   Chase@hbcboulder.com

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1673Wed, 26 Apr 2017 09:00:51 -070017:32falsefullAdam Chase lives in Boulder, Colorado. He is a professional trail runner, a professional snowshoe racer, a writer, a tax lawyer, an editor, an adventure racer, a mentor, a father, a husband, a brand ambassador, and the President of the American Trail Running Association. He talks to us about how he dealt with the toughest…Lori LeeEpisode 031 Anxiety – The Ties that Bind and BreakAnxiety – The Ties that Bind and Break

                   Yesterday I was listening to an episode of the Reply All podcast. It’s a podcast about different aspects of the internet, actually pretty cool because you can sorta keep tabs on interesting digital world things going on. So…. anyway, this episode was titled “Anxiety Box.” The show description goes like this, “Sometimes, on his way to work, a feeling of pressure begins thumping in Paul Ford’s chest. His breaths shorten. They speed up. And, sometimes in those moments of extreme anxiety Paul’s phone talks to him. It tells him everything that’s wrong with him.”  I had clicked on this episode arbitrarily, I hadn’t read the description, but it turns out that Paul created a program called Anxiety Box … stay with us to find out what this is and a sure fire way to break that tie that binds.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee and I’m excited about for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. The power of story serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   So as it turns out, the Anxiety Box is a computer program where you can type in all the things you’re anxious about and your email address, and all day your “anxiety” will send you messages, in the general language of that anxiety voice, to remind you how you’re probably not going to succeed, or live, or get pregnant or whatever you’re feeling anxious about. It sounds like a horrible program, but what it did for him was to dehumanize the voice in his head, the voice of his deep anxieties, and he could see them for the spam that they were.

                   Now, I bring this up because until I heard his description of what he was going through – about sitting on the couch and feeling like he really had to get on that project, and then the voice saying, “Ya, but you’ll never be able to do it.” And then that sense of overwhelm hits, and then there’s that want to crawl under a blanket and not think about it, or maybe I should subscribe to Netflix…I hadn’t known what that was. My inner voice was calling it “pathetic ineffectiveness,” I explained it to my friends as “hitting a wall,” but once he explained it as anxiety, it suddenly felt more normal, less like a flaw and more like something to be managed. I don’t think of myself as an anxious person, so I could work that through – couldn’t I? The Atlantic magazine calls Anxiety “America’s most common mental illness.” That sounds pretty normal.

                   For the last three months, I’ve had a list of things that need to be done on this podcast that I am completely inexperienced in. I’m having to learn, every step of the way, how to do each and every little thing, like setting up email campaigns for my listeners, collecting email addresses to start the community, effective social media marketing – not just regular social media marketing – no, effective social media marketing, integration with programs like lead pages, Aweber,  lead magnet construction, and what feels like a hundred other detours along each route. While you guys out there that know how to do all of this are thinking, “What’s the big deal?” for those of us who don’t know how to do all of this there is deep anxiety around figuring it out. In my case, it’s three months of staring at this list – there are actually about five lists now.  I just keep making new lists of things that should be done. Now really, I’ve been watching how-to videos and listening to the more experienced folks who have done this, and then… freezing up. My partner and I have been pushing the items on this list back and forth to each other…. Neither of us knows how to do them.

                   A few days ago I was talking to my son. I told him that I wished he knew how...]]>Anxiety – The Ties that Bind and Break

                   Yesterday I was listening to an episode of the Reply All podcast. It’s a podcast about different aspects of the internet, actually pretty cool because you can sorta keep tabs on interesting digital world things going on. So…. anyway, this episode was titled “Anxiety Box.” The show description goes like this, “Sometimes, on his way to work, a feeling of pressure begins thumping in Paul Ford’s chest. His breaths shorten. They speed up. And, sometimes in those moments of extreme anxiety Paul’s phone talks to him. It tells him everything that’s wrong with him.”  I had clicked on this episode arbitrarily, I hadn’t read the description, but it turns out that Paul created a program called Anxiety Box … stay with us to find out what this is and a sure fire way to break that tie that binds.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee and I’m excited about for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. The power of story serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   So as it turns out, the Anxiety Box is a computer program where you can type in all the things you’re anxious about and your email address, and all day your “anxiety” will send you messages, in the general language of that anxiety voice, to remind you how you’re probably not going to succeed, or live, or get pregnant or whatever you’re feeling anxious about. It sounds like a horrible program, but what it did for him was to dehumanize the voice in his head, the voice of his deep anxieties, and he could see them for the spam that they were.

                   Now, I bring this up because until I heard his description of what he was going through – about sitting on the couch and feeling like he really had to get on that project, and then the voice saying, “Ya, but you’ll never be able to do it.” And then that sense of overwhelm hits, and then there’s that want to crawl under a blanket and not think about it, or maybe I should subscribe to Netflix…I hadn’t known what that was. My inner voice was calling it “pathetic ineffectiveness,” I explained it to my friends as “hitting a wall,” but once he explained it as anxiety, it suddenly felt more normal, less like a flaw and more like something to be managed. I don’t think of myself as an anxious person, so I could work that through – couldn’t I? The Atlantic magazine calls Anxiety “America’s most common mental illness.” That sounds pretty normal.

                   For the last three months, I’ve had a list of things that need to be done on this podcast that I am completely inexperienced in. I’m having to learn, every step of the way, how to do each and every little thing, like setting up email campaigns for my listeners, collecting email addresses to start the community, effective social media marketing – not just regular social media marketing – no, effective social media marketing, integration with programs like lead pages, Aweber,  lead magnet construction, and what feels like a hundred other detours along each route. While you guys out there that know how to do all of this are thinking, “What’s the big deal?” for those of us who don’t know how to do all of this there is deep anxiety around figuring it out. In my case, it’s three months of staring at this list – there are actually about five lists now.  I just keep making new lists of things that should be done. Now really, I’ve been watching how-to videos and listening to the more experienced folks who have done this, and then… freezing up. My partner and I have been pushing the items on this list back and forth to each other…. Neither of us knows how to do them.

                   A few days ago I was talking to my son. I told him that I wished he knew how to do all of this so I could just hire him to take over this segment of the project. He asked how long I thought it would take him to learn it. As I explained that I had all the learning resources available, I realized that because he is incredibly smart and focused when he wants to be, that he could potentially get this all done within a couple weeks. It’s been three months of sitting here and looking at the list in frustration and anxiety and I’m still just looking at the list. It dawned on me that it probably wasn’t as sinister as it seemed, but that didn’t really change the fact that I could only stare at the list and imagine a fairy godmother swooping in with a wand.

                   I’m sharing this because it’s a real-life story of anxiety. It’s an example of what many of you also deal with on a daily basis, especially if you are leaning into possibility, creating big things in the world, getting in the arena and making things happen. We’ve talked about the one-liners in our heads that complain and remind us why we couldn’t, shouldn’t or wouldn’t go do this or that. And, here it is in a bold, blaring, anxiety ridden example.

                   From the outside, other people’s anxieties often seem minuscule. I mean…I look at the person, I see how capable they are, and it’s hard to believe that they are letting some arbitrary voice in their head scare the crap out them and immobilize them into a space of self-doubt. That’s often how I feel when I’m coaching or watching others – I see all their beauty, all their skill, all their heart and all their desire, and I don’t feel the doubt they feel in themselves. On the contrary, I see their power. I see their possibility. I see crazy success and awesome lives ahead of them, but before they can get there, they have to see that in themselves. And even when we do see it in ourselves, every day we’re still dealing with that voice that Paul Ford refers to as the robot spam voice that creates all the fear and doubt inside us. In the podcast episode, he admits to hitting  “reply” to those emails  his anxiety sends him and tells them to “shut the fu&% up.” Sometimes he sends that email response over and over.

                   Here’s the obvious irony for me – I’m so afraid of wasting time that I don’t embark on the project because it may not work and I will have wasted the time I spent trying to figure it out. So, I sit and stare at the list of projects that need to be done, completely wasting time, in this case, three months now, because I haven’t jumped into the projects. It reminds me of my second husband, he was so afraid of losing me that he didn’t want me to talk to other people, he didn’t want me to have friends for fear I’d like them more than I liked him, he tapped my email accounts and sent scathing emails to anyone he felt I’d been too friendly to. He put a strangle hold on me in an attempt to make sure I never left him, which of course had the opposite effect. Which brings me to the point -Too often our fears and anxieties create the exact situations we are afraid of.

                   What are you afraid of right now in your life? What are you anxious about? How are you responding to that anxiety? How is your response to the anxiety contributing to the outcome you want, or don’t want? Think about that for just a second. Go ahead, pause the podcast.

                   If I answer these questions regarding where I’m at with the podcast right now I have to say that my anxiety about these next steps is causing me to freeze up, freezing up is causing me to waste time and slow down the growth of the podcast and the Love Your Story movement. Solution – thaw the freeze and start moving forward, even if it’s one baby step at a time. Action creates motivation, just a little bit of movement starts to open the doors to possibility and the momentum builds. So today, I promise you, I’m committing to doing the first thing on the list. No matter what. Just because I don’t know how to get there, doesn’t mean I can’t get there. Remember that line – “Just because I don’t know how to get there, doesn’t mean I can’t get there.”

                   I think of the words from my coach and think – this is a good time to find support.

                   For some of us, asking for support is harder than it is for others. But I’m going to start asking around.

                   A few days later I’ve got a lunch set up with Mel the Marvelous. She’s a people connector, and she has sooo many contacts and she is going to give me a little guidance in hooking me up with someone who can help me do all these things I don’t know how to do, and maybe even sponsors for the podcast.

                   This support thing was a good idea. After I had lunch with Mel I set up a meeting with a social media expert, and Mel started “educating” some of her contacts about the chance for sponsorships and working with Love Your Story. I’ll let you know how all that goes.  But for sure, there was a bite out of the anxiety. Action had been taken.

                   Chris Ducker, the mastermind of YouPreneur, a community of entrepreneurs, said, “As much as we enjoy hearing about the self-made man or woman, the reality of things is that collaboration and connection will always play a role in our success. Bottom line, without others, dreams remain dreams. And the same goes for you. That means whatever you are pursuing, whatever you’re wanting, whatever’s keeping you awake at night because you can’t stop dreaming about it…you’re going to need to enlist the help of others to get it.”

                   Do you know who Diana Nyad is? In 2013 she was finally, on her 5^th try, did what no one else had ever done – swam from Cuba to Florida without a shark cage. It was 53 hours of straight swimming – 110 miles. She had been training and trying for years to make this swim, and by the time she did it, she was in her 60’s.  She gave a Ted Talk after this and she talked repeatedly about the work her entire team did to make this happen, (Insert Ted Talk blurb about the team). A 35 person support team who had worked with her over the years. “I didn’t do it,” she said, “we did it.  It looks like the most solitary endeavor in the world, and in many ways it is, but in other ways, the most important ways, it’s a team, and if you think I’m a badass, you should meet Bonnie.”  From what I can ascertain, Bonnie is her team manager. She had scientists, sports scientists endurance experts, neurologists. She had support, a cheering squad, an entire team working with her. Did she have moments of anxiety – Oh, you bet she did. Swimming in shark infested waters with the most poisonous jellyfish in the world surrounding you, not to mention the pure exhaustion of the swim. I can’t even imagine.

                   We don’t accomplish big things, or important things without a struggle, without moments of anxiety, fear, and not knowing how to get there – that’s just part of the journey. But the story has more than one character. The cast of the story is not just the hero – the self-made man or woman Chris Ducker was speaking of, we want our stories to have fairy godmothers who bring us just what we need when we need it, and woodsmen who save us from the wolves, and Jiminy Crickets who remind us of the best decisions, and Merlins to work their magic. Anxiety is a real life part of life and making shit happen – and often the answer to breaking that tie that binds us, is to ask for support. Reach out. Pray. Let people know what you need. You might be surprised what you find when you head out looking for support. I’m still always surprised, but it’s also those moments when other people show up big that my bonds with hope, God, and my fellow story characters grow two-sizes. That I don’t feel so alone. That I can keep moving forward. Life is best played as a team sport.

                   This week’s challenge is for those of you feeling anxious about something, anything. Determine the story around your anxious feelings and then take a step forward in finding the support you need toward the solution. Try it. What have you got to lose, but a little anxiety? Nothing changes until we do something different. Have a good week out there making your stories better. Remember you’re just where you need to be right now. Now head to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and leave your thoughts and comments on this episode. We want to hear from you.

                   Melissa Miller; Miller Consulting – Guest Interview  801.529.2905

                   www.employmentmatchmaker.com

                    

                    

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1660Wed, 19 Apr 2017 09:00:37 -070020:32falsefullWe don’t accomplish big things, or important things without a struggle, without moments of anxiety, fear, and not knowing how to get there – that’s just part of the journey. But the story has more than one character. The cast of the story is not just the hero – the self-made man or woman, we want our stories to have fairy godmothers who bring us just what we need when we need it, and woodsmen who save us from the wolves, and Jiminy Crickets who remind us of the best decisions, and Merlins to work their magic. Anxiety is a real part of life and making shit happen – and often the answer to breaking that tie that binds us, is to ask for support.Lori LeeEpisode 030 Beautiful People Do Not Just Happen – A few thoughts on AdversityBEAUTIFUL PEOPLE DO NOT JUST HAPPEN – A few thoughts on Adversity

                   Elisabeth Kubler Ross said, “The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness and a deep loving concern.  Beautiful people do not just happen.” Join us today for a discussion on those life trials that rip our very hearts out, and how they can also be the stepping stones to our depth and beauty. Stay with us to talk about the hard stuff and why it makes us beautiful.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited about our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   One thing I’ve come to understand over the years is that all people experience adversity. The ravages of life spare not race, religion, gender or geographic area. Trials, disappointments, sickness, sadness, heartbreak, and loss are all a part of life for everyone, no matter who you are. It’s part of the whole deal: death, taxes, and trails. You can’t escape any of them. But, we do get to decide how we process them; what we do with them; who we become because of them.

                   Adversity is a bag filled with variation. Trials may come from choices we make that then make our lives harder, like an unwanted teen pregnancy, or an addiction. Trials may come from choices others make that affect us like a spouse who cheats on us, an unscrupulous business scam, or abuse. Adversity may come upon us, such as an illness or death of a loved one, things that are a part of being mortal. We usually get a spattering in all three categories. We all have far more in common than we often stop to realize. There is that familiar saying about being kind to everyone because you never know what they are going through, no matter what it looks like on the outside. Probably a good idea!

                   From a story perspective, it’s an uneventful story that doesn’t have tension, climax, and a hero who must decide how to engage in the battle.

                   One of those heroes we all know – Christopher Reeve, said, “A hero is an ordinary individual who finds the strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles.” He was a super man, wasn’t he?!

                   Today I want to share a story with you about a little girl known affectionately as Lady Bug. I know this little girl personally. Her parents are real estate clients of mine, and her grandparents live next store to me. I’ve watched her run around my backyard with her cousins. She’s a real life story with her cute little glasses and her joy for life. Rylie was born in May of 2012. The first few months of her life were filled with happiness and sleep deprivation for her parents – all the normal stuff. Her mom and dad were completely in love with their beautiful baby girl.

                   Two months later, at a well-baby check-up, they asked the pediatrician to take a look at the numerous “birthmarks” that were appearing all over Rylie’s body. The Dr. took a look and then left the exam room to make some calls. When he returned he told the nervous parents that he suspected their brand new baby daughter had a genetic condition called Neurofibromatosis. He referred them to a geneticist at Primary Children’s Hospital and told them NOT to Google anything.

                   Shocked and dismayed, they went home and waited for the hospital to call them back. When the hospital called they told them the wait time was over 6 months to get in. Furious, terrified, completely sad, they turned to the internet anyway to]]>BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE DO NOT JUST HAPPEN – A few thoughts on Adversity

                   Elisabeth Kubler Ross said, “The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness and a deep loving concern.  Beautiful people do not just happen.” Join us today for a discussion on those life trials that rip our very hearts out, and how they can also be the stepping stones to our depth and beauty. Stay with us to talk about the hard stuff and why it makes us beautiful.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited about our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Story power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   One thing I’ve come to understand over the years is that all people experience adversity. The ravages of life spare not race, religion, gender or geographic area. Trials, disappointments, sickness, sadness, heartbreak, and loss are all a part of life for everyone, no matter who you are. It’s part of the whole deal: death, taxes, and trails. You can’t escape any of them. But, we do get to decide how we process them; what we do with them; who we become because of them.

                   Adversity is a bag filled with variation. Trials may come from choices we make that then make our lives harder, like an unwanted teen pregnancy, or an addiction. Trials may come from choices others make that affect us like a spouse who cheats on us, an unscrupulous business scam, or abuse. Adversity may come upon us, such as an illness or death of a loved one, things that are a part of being mortal. We usually get a spattering in all three categories. We all have far more in common than we often stop to realize. There is that familiar saying about being kind to everyone because you never know what they are going through, no matter what it looks like on the outside. Probably a good idea!

                   From a story perspective, it’s an uneventful story that doesn’t have tension, climax, and a hero who must decide how to engage in the battle.

                   One of those heroes we all know – Christopher Reeve, said, “A hero is an ordinary individual who finds the strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles.” He was a super man, wasn’t he?!

                   Today I want to share a story with you about a little girl known affectionately as Lady Bug. I know this little girl personally. Her parents are real estate clients of mine, and her grandparents live next store to me. I’ve watched her run around my backyard with her cousins. She’s a real life story with her cute little glasses and her joy for life. Rylie was born in May of 2012. The first few months of her life were filled with happiness and sleep deprivation for her parents – all the normal stuff. Her mom and dad were completely in love with their beautiful baby girl.

                   Two months later, at a well-baby check-up, they asked the pediatrician to take a look at the numerous “birthmarks” that were appearing all over Rylie’s body. The Dr. took a look and then left the exam room to make some calls. When he returned he told the nervous parents that he suspected their brand new baby daughter had a genetic condition called Neurofibromatosis. He referred them to a geneticist at Primary Children’s Hospital and told them NOT to Google anything.

                   Shocked and dismayed, they went home and waited for the hospital to call them back. When the hospital called they told them the wait time was over 6 months to get in. Furious, terrified, completely sad, they turned to the internet anyway to find what answers they could, and the pictures they found terrified them. The happiest time of their lives had just turned into the worst time of their lives.

                   The next few months were a blur of doctor appointments, specialists, waiting….so much waiting. Waiting to see if their baby girl developed a tumor. The uncertainty killed them, the waiting killed them, the sadness overwhelmed them. The doctor visits ripped their hearts out. No one could give them any answers.

                   In February of 2014 Rylie was having a routine eye exam, and her mom knew something was wrong. “How in the hell am I going to get a toddler to wear glasses,” she thought to herself. “It seems trivial now,” her mom says. Especially when we found out that Rylie was growing a tumor on her optic nerve.

                   They were rushed over to the Moran Eye Center for more tests and scheduled for an MRI the next morning. The next 24 hours were a complete blur. They were terrified to hear the MRI report, but deep down they knew what they were going to hear. They had known it was a possibility, but now it was actually happening. And it scared the hell out of them.

                   The next morning the doctors confirmed that their 19 month old daughter had two tumors growing on her brain. She was officially diagnosed with Bi-Lateral Optic Nerve Gliomas. They were told to expect a call from the oncologist. What!??? Another punch to the gut. An oncologist meant chemotherapy…. They were so scared they couldn’t even ask questions, they just said okay and hung up the phone.

                   A week later they met with an oncology team at Primary Children’s Hospital- – every option seeming so unfair! She wasn’t even 2 years old and the things they were talking about were things her mother didn’t think she could even handle as an adult. “She’s just a baby!” kept running through her mother’s mind.

                   Ultimately, two days after her second birthday Rylie began a yearlong chemotherapy protocol. It was the longest and hardest year of their lives.

                   She said, “Watching your child go through something so traumatic is completely devastating. Your sole job as a parent is to protect your child, but from the day she was diagnosed with NF we felt that control was taken away from us. For 12 long months we watched her get poison injected into her little body. We watched her scream every time they accessed her port. We wiped her tears every time she got sick. We held her hand every time they had to sedate her for another MRI, and each and every time it broke our hearts just a little bit more.”

                   Riley’s disease ruined the picture perfect dream life they had imaged. The year she went through chemo broke them down day after day. It took their world and it turned it upside down, made life a constant battle. They worry every time she complains of pain. Their hearts sink thinking it may be another tumor, a tumor they will be powerless to stop.

                   NF took control of many parts of their life; financially, emotionally… their “normal” routine is anything but normal.

                   Brandie, Rylie’s mom said, “NF has made certain parts of our life very difficult and hard to swallow but it has also made things so amazing. It has helped us find joy in the little things…. the everyday things. We found joy in the first time Rylie learned to take her medications by herself. We found joy when Rylie started preschool. We found joy in going to the grocery store- together as a family after being locked in the house for a year. We find joy in watching her be an everyday kid. We’ve learned that life is messy BUT it’s a blessing and we have to enjoy each and every moment we are given!

                   When the questions of “Why me? I don’t deserve this.” And “This is so unfair,” are the mantras repeating in our minds we are lapsing into victim mode. We have the choice to complain and become bitter. That’s definitely one approach—easy and often justified, but these questions have the power to dominate our minds. They absorb our energy and our vision and our story begins to spiral into a place of darkness. That’s the only place it can spiral to.

                   Another approach, which is often much more difficult, but so much healthier, is to ask different questions. To ask the questions like, “What can I learn from this? What action can I take from this point to creating meaning? What am I to change?” “What are my blessings today?” This is the crux of reframing a story. I feel like this is what Rylie’s family did. They found the value of the small and meaningful things. They found the gift hidden in the nightmare.

                   Our stories are created by the events that go on around us, certainly, but the power we give those events in our minds is where the stories become either tragedies or heroic tales of fighting through the fire swamp and overpowering the ROI – rodents of unusual size. This is the space where the dark side takes over, as it did with Anakin in Star Wars, and Darth Vader is created, or where one overcomes the injustices inherent with adversity by using them for transformation and learning, or finding the gift in the struggle. It’s not always something you can find right away, and that’s okay. I don’t think it’s reasonable to expect that we won’t feel our fear, disappointment and sadness and just jump right up with a positive attitude to win the day. Traumatic events are by nature, events that take us to the brink of our human capabilities, but in the end, it is up to us how they become translated.

                   Julia Cameron, in her book The Sound of Paper, describes the process of the creation of a pearl. “…pearls are what happen when an oyster or some other mollusk is irritated by the invasion of some disturbing intruder into its closed shell.  Pearls are layers and layers of soothing nacre intended to insulate the delicate mollusk from the irritant that has abraded it. At root, a pearl is a disturbance, a beauty caused by something that isn’t supposed to be there, about which something needs to be done. It is the interruption of equilibrium that creates beauty. Beauty is a response to provocation, to intrusion. …The pearl’s beauty is made as a result of insult.”

                   Different adversity requires different response. For example, when we suffer from the actions of others the healthy response requires broadening of our perspective to understand another and the often difficult task of forgiveness (check out episode 05 for thoughts on forgiveness). A death or an illness may require faith in purpose, patience in suffering, and strength in finding meaning. If we create our own pain and suffering we get to have the strength to change our behavior and live in ways that don’t create misery. If we are abused we must seek help.

                   I grew up in a loving, Christian home. We went to church every Sunday, and at that time it was implied that if we lived good lives and followed the commandments of God that our lives would be happy and safe. There was the happily ever after painted of joyful marriage and family, and all that was required was to live well and follow the commandments and ritual prescribed by the church and all would turn out rosy. It could have been my misunderstanding or the deep desire of the young women leaders to get us all to live good lives, that these false promises were made, but I had quite a time coming to grips with them as my life progressed and things didn’t turn out that way. I had to learn an important point as taught by Carlfred Broderick, a former professor of sociology and head of the marriage and family therapy program at the University of Southern California, who received his degrees from Harvard and Cornell. A member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, he wrote an essay on the Uses of Adversity. He says, “The gospel of Jesus Christ is not insurance against pain, it is the resource in event of pain, and when pain comes…rejoice that you have the resource to deal with your pain.” When there are no earthly answers, when our understanding is stretched beyond its limits, when mortality is simply too much for us, there is hope in the atonement of Christ and faith in him.

                   While this is a non-denominational podcast, meant to inspire and empower people no matter their religious beliefs, I must bear testimony that the atonement of Christ plays two roles, one in wiping away the mistakes we make so that we can start fresh and walk away from the ugliness we often create in our lives –it’s like taking the stones of guilt and shame out of the backpacks we carry around accumulating life experiences; and the second is in the power of his atonement to give us power beyond our own to keep standing up, to keep trying, to enable us to be more than we are alone when the ravages of this thing we call life knock on our door.  I’d like to suggest an equivalent for other belief systems, but there simply isn’t one. The atonement of Christ is the only power by which those things are given. So, I recommend them, because having a source of cleansing ourselves gives hope and propels us forward. The lightened load keeps us from sinking in the swamps of despair. It’s a gift and another beautiful tool given by a God who loves us.

                   Simon Sinek said, “The most important thing to do before we die is live.” I could use this quote in almost any of my podcasts because it applies across the board to every topic. But I think it applies to this topic beautifully because times of trial are times when living is the hardest. It’s these hard, uphill climbs when we often want to stop – sit down on the metaphorical trail or jump off the cliff. I’ve had moments where I could not see any point in going on. I’ve had times I wanted the whole darn thing to be over with. But I’ve come to realize, that like it or not, living is a collage of beautiful moments, staggering pain, ah ha moments, fleeting peace, uncertainty, fear – in all its forms, accomplishment, joy, love, hate, anger. The woven fabric of our lives contain colors that range from deep purples and brilliant reds to mustard yellows and deep, dark blacks. We don’t see the design in the living, but I believe God does, and I’ve lived long enough now that when I look back I start to see some of the design in the woven pattern of my life, and it’s pretty darn gorgeous!

                   Michael Jordan said, “Obstacles don’t have to stop you. If you run into a wall, don’t turn around and give up. Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it.”

                   One day I was rafting down the mocha waters of the Colorado river. It was like a postcard.  The sky that bright, rich blue with a few perfectly placed, fluffy, white clouds that dot and give dimension.  The J-rig (a style of boat) I lounge on, puttered down river and I sat facing backward, watching the waterway expand behind us between the layers of tall, red, western cliff walls rutted and shaped by the desert, brilliant in stark color.  We went, mile by mile, hour after hour, and the time was a luxury allowing me to pull out a reading book, a pen, and paper with which to write.

                   We passed another raft, the guide pushed and pulled at the oars as the umbrella-protected couple sleeps.  This is the Venice of the West. Our gondola man wore a black cowboy hat, a beard, and the grin of the young.  He lied up a storm, making up facts about history, geology, failed oil projects, and his personal theories on past civilizations.  If there is one thing river guides are infamous for, it is their gift for making up the details and coloring the truth with the same rusty red that colors these Utah rocks.  Cowboy (the name I’ve given our guide) sleeps on his cooler during the lazy water stretches, his tan legs sprawled in devil-may-care fashion.  The entire picture makes me want to write, the weather is great, wish you were here. Instead, I look at my chipped toenail polish, think about how I need to pee, and wish that my camera could capture this scene. As I float beneath the majestic cliffs carved by the river I notice the process of carving that is constantly taking place along the cliffs. Chunks of rock crumble and fall as the water cuts and shapes, more stone is revealed as the water digs deeper, removing more dirt. The canyons become broader, deeper, revealing more as the detritus is washed downstream. And isn’t that a lot like life?

                   Sending you my love for all your hard stories. And my hope that you’ll find the gifts in the nightmares, the beauty in the carving, the pattern emerging in the tapestry of your life. No matter how messy it looks from your current perspective. Keep hope and share the stories that bring hope to others.

                   Love to hear from you on our website…www.loveyourstorypodcast. Please head over and share your stories, ideas, thoughts, concerns and suggestions.

                    

                    

                    

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1649Wed, 12 Apr 2017 09:00:37 -070019:51falsefullElisabeth Kubler Ross said, “The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.” Join us today for a discussion on those life trials that rip our very hearts out, and how they can also be the stepping stones to our depth and beauty. Stay with us to talk about the hard stuff and why it makes us beautiful.Lori LeeEpisode 029 Special Edition: 10 Steps to Resiliency – with Becky AndrewsFinding Your Personal Resilience – From coping to thriving in the Journey.

                   Becky Andrews, the clinical director of Resilient Solutions Inc., and a previous guest on our show, shares with us her 10 steps to resiliency. How do you take care of yourself so you can bounce back when life is difficult? Listen to today’s podcast for her professional plan that she has also implemented in her own life, as a woman with a degenerative eye disease that caused her to lose her eyesight. Despite this disability, Becky learned resiliency as she became a wife and mother, a therapist, a community activist, and a marathon runner. She is the author of her autobiography Look up, Move Forward.

                   To contact Becky Andrews:

                   Resilientsolutionsinc.com (You can also find her book on her website.)

                   beckylpc@gmail.com

                   (801) 259 3883

                   Thank you for tuning in, and as always, please share this podcast with someone you feel could use it. Share the love!

                    

                   ]]>Finding Your Personal Resilience – From coping to thriving in the Journey.

                   Becky Andrews, the clinical director of Resilient Solutions Inc., and a previous guest on our show, shares with us her 10 steps to resiliency. How do you take care of yourself so you can bounce back when life is difficult? Listen to today’s podcast for her professional plan that she has also implemented in her own life, as a woman with a degenerative eye disease that caused her to lose her eyesight. Despite this disability, Becky learned resiliency as she became a wife and mother, a therapist, a community activist, and a marathon runner. She is the author of her autobiography Look up, Move Forward.

                   To contact Becky Andrews:

                   Resilientsolutionsinc.com (You can also find her book on her website.)

                   beckylpc@gmail.com

                   (801) 259 3883

                   Thank you for tuning in, and as always, please share this podcast with someone you feel could use it. Share the love!

                    

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1630Wed, 05 Apr 2017 14:37:10 -070025:29falsefullBecky Andrews, the clinical director of Resilient Solutions Inc., and a previous guest on our show, shares with us her 10 steps to resiliency. How do you take care of yourself so you can bounce back when life is difficult? Listen to today's podcast for her professional plan that she has also implemented in her own life, as a woman with a degenerative eye disease that caused her to lose her eyesight. Despite this disability, Becky learned resiliency as she became a wife and mother, a therapist, a community activist, and a marathon runner. She is the author of her autobiography Look up, Move Forward.Lori LeeEpisode 028 Building a Space for One Another – Setting the Scene of the StoryBuilding a Space for One Another – Setting the Scene of the Story

                   Before my children were born I created a space for them. I secured a warm home, set up a new-born bedroom. I painted and cleaned. I made quilts and chose clothing, bought story books and a baby bathtub. Acquired toys and binkies, diapers and burp cloths. We prepared a space for them to come into the world that would provide love, care, warmth, cleanliness, and learning. We created their secure base. Stay with me, we’re going to talk about the power we have to set the scene – set the stage in which our story plays out.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee and I’m excited about for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Storypower serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   When I was newly married, like really newly married, still unpacking boxes into our first little apartment, I was so nervous about being domestic that I called my aunt to get her opinion on if I should buy this little copper tea pot I had found at a department store in the mall. It was pretty groovy, but I wasn’t sure about creating a home. “Sure,” she said, “You are creating a home, a space for both of you. Your husband will appreciate what you build.” Okay, I thought. And I bought the teapot and I placed it on the stove. It’s hard for me to get back in that 24-year-old mind, I’m not certain what I was so nervous about, but at the time domesticity was not something I aspired to. Since then I have come to love the responsibility of creating a comfortable, clean environment that is filled with things that make me happy and have meaning to me; a place that provides safety and comfort for my children, my friends, and any family that decide to stop by. I keep the kitchen bright, the candles lit, the floors vacuumed and my selection of hot cocoa, tea and cider at the ready. I don’t have that copper teapot anymore, I’m not sure where it went. I also don’t have the nose ring I had put in when I had my first son – also an attempt to fight of domesticity. It’s been a process.

                   I want to talk about this subject today because I don’t think it gets talked about much. It’s something we do, some of us do it on purpose, some of us just sorta live where we’re dropped, some of us are too busy with life to focus on how we’re living, but I think purposeful living and the power that comes in creating atmosphere and place is something worth a twenty-minute conversation. It’s the basis for many of our stories– scene and set I think can make a big difference in the energy of the story, the happiness of the characters, and the delight in the space that you control.

                    

                   Spaces of light or darkness

                   I got to the point where nesting, creating the space for my child to come into the world was rich and purposeful. But it must be noted that as the days of our lives unfolded after that initial preparation of his baby room, we still continued and continue to this day, to create space for one another. Every day it’s still going on. We have the power to create all types of spaces.  Imagine spaces of creativity, possibility, spaces of love and warmth, acceptance and support. Spaces of learning and work, struggle and overcoming. Humans also create some pretty horrible spaces for each other. We so easily create spaces of stress, of unrealistic expectation, of bitterness, of revenge, of depression, of abuse, of chaos and filth, of crudeness…our options range from all the negative influences and emotions we struggle to manage, to the light-filled spaces of love, joy and possibility. Here’s the point of today’s podcast – YOU have the power to create the set...]]>Building a Space for One Another – Setting the Scene of the Story

                   Before my children were born I created a space for them. I secured a warm home, set up a new-born bedroom. I painted and cleaned. I made quilts and chose clothing, bought story books and a baby bathtub. Acquired toys and binkies, diapers and burp cloths. We prepared a space for them to come into the world that would provide love, care, warmth, cleanliness, and learning. We created their secure base. Stay with me, we’re going to talk about the power we have to set the scene – set the stage in which our story plays out.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee and I’m excited about for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Storypower serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   When I was newly married, like really newly married, still unpacking boxes into our first little apartment, I was so nervous about being domestic that I called my aunt to get her opinion on if I should buy this little copper tea pot I had found at a department store in the mall. It was pretty groovy, but I wasn’t sure about creating a home. “Sure,” she said, “You are creating a home, a space for both of you. Your husband will appreciate what you build.” Okay, I thought. And I bought the teapot and I placed it on the stove. It’s hard for me to get back in that 24-year-old mind, I’m not certain what I was so nervous about, but at the time domesticity was not something I aspired to. Since then I have come to love the responsibility of creating a comfortable, clean environment that is filled with things that make me happy and have meaning to me; a place that provides safety and comfort for my children, my friends, and any family that decide to stop by. I keep the kitchen bright, the candles lit, the floors vacuumed and my selection of hot cocoa, tea and cider at the ready. I don’t have that copper teapot anymore, I’m not sure where it went. I also don’t have the nose ring I had put in when I had my first son – also an attempt to fight of domesticity. It’s been a process.

                   I want to talk about this subject today because I don’t think it gets talked about much. It’s something we do, some of us do it on purpose, some of us just sorta live where we’re dropped, some of us are too busy with life to focus on how we’re living, but I think purposeful living and the power that comes in creating atmosphere and place is something worth a twenty-minute conversation. It’s the basis for many of our stories– scene and set I think can make a big difference in the energy of the story, the happiness of the characters, and the delight in the space that you control.

                    

                   Spaces of light or darkness

                   I got to the point where nesting, creating the space for my child to come into the world was rich and purposeful. But it must be noted that as the days of our lives unfolded after that initial preparation of his baby room, we still continued and continue to this day, to create space for one another. Every day it’s still going on. We have the power to create all types of spaces.  Imagine spaces of creativity, possibility, spaces of love and warmth, acceptance and support. Spaces of learning and work, struggle and overcoming. Humans also create some pretty horrible spaces for each other. We so easily create spaces of stress, of unrealistic expectation, of bitterness, of revenge, of depression, of abuse, of chaos and filth, of crudeness…our options range from all the negative influences and emotions we struggle to manage, to the light-filled spaces of love, joy and possibility. Here’s the point of today’s podcast – YOU have the power to create the set your life scenes unfold in.  You have the power to create a space around you that nurtures love and acceptance of the people in your life. You get to set the scene for your story. You do that in lots of ways. It’s not about money and what you can buy to surround you. Most of the really meaningful parts of creating scene are about meaning and purposeful creating. One of the first things to consider is that the things you let into your home also create those spaces of light and darkness. Media is a big one I’ll throw out for discussion. TV shows, Netflix, Cable, music, YouTube, video games– all of these things set a tone, a mood, an energy. You’ve listened to hard, crude music and you know the energy that creates. Compare that with something that creates positive energy for you. TV and movies can uplift and inspire while they can also very quickly delve into crudeness, pornography, humor that degrades and dark themes. Media has power over our moods, over our perceptions, over our life views and we also get to choose what we let into our homes and what we put in our minds. That’s not an arbitrary thing either. What goes in dictates what comes out. You want light, hope, inspiration in your daily living – make sure that’s what you put in.

                    

                   The Stuff

                   The American Association for Community theater defines the set designer’s job as: All the scenery, furniture and props the audience sees at a production of a play that make up the set design. The set designer’s job is to design these physical surroundings in which the action will take place.

                   When a set designer begins to create the layout of the set one of the things they are doing is setting mood and atmosphere. They do this with the layout of the set as well as with the items that are chosen to be present in the set, or in other words the things we place around us. I love fresh flowers, yummy candles, books, music, and dancing. So I place these things in my living space. I buy myself fresh flowers when no one else does. I fill my house with yummy scents that make it a warm and homey place. I have book shelves with books, but I also have a chair I sit in to do most of my studying and it’s surrounded by books, notepads, highlighters, sticky pads. I make sure that my children have access to books, book shelves, library cards. My son loves music so music plays daily and we sing and dance around the house, despite the fact that most of us are in different keys. Alice Walker said, “Whenever you are creating beauty around you, you are restoring your own soul.” Yes….I feel that, do you?

                   When my children were growing up I subscribed to Kid’s National Geographic magazine for them every year. Filled with pictures of exotic animals, games, and stories they raced to the mailbox when their magazine came every month.  I provided them with reading materials, games and excursions so they had positive options to choose from. This was my choice – something I actively designed and created. I think that’s where the power of this discussion comes into play—the simple realization that we have the power and responsibility to not be passive users of our space, but to create spaces around us that are filled with things that have meaning to us; that reflect our values and the values we want to pass on; that make us smile because we love that painting, that super soft couch, that chai tea that we always keep stocked in the cupboard.

                   I have a bulletin board built into my kitchen wall. It’s a large cork board and I put pictures up of our adventures. I change them out every season with new shots. –Early on, in my twenties, when my friends and I were setting up our homes, I noticed one friend who put pictures of herself and her husband all over the house. It wasn’t just in the living room, no from the back of the toilet there was a picture of them smiling on some beach. They were in the dining room, they were in the hallway. At the time I remember being shocked but impressed. I think it might have been her home that made me come to realize how wonderful it was to remind yourself daily of adventures and good times. I’ve continued to do this – keep pictures up—because I feel like it solidifies memories. On down days it reminds us we have good times. Sometimes the people in the pictures would be lost in a memory of the past, but since they are on our bulletin board they are more front and center in our lives. We remember the people more actively that come in and out of our lives. This is one of the ways I personalize my home.

                    

                   Simplicity

                   In his TED talk, Grahm Hill, a writer and designer and the founder of LifeEdited, makes a case for the idea that simplicity in our living and our ownership of “stuff” and happiness are tied. He talks about how we have 3x the amount of space that we did 50 years ago, but that we fill it up and then branch out into storage units. He points out that our happiness levels also flat-lined in the last 50 years. Early on in his history, he sold a company for 10 million dollars. He was young and he started buying stuff to fill that void that we humans often try to fill. After awhile it started to drive him crazy, so he got rid of it all. He now lives in a super simple 420 sq. ft. apartment that uses the spaces with the precision of expert design that created it. He has fold-down beds and fold-out desks. Big windows and lots of lights set the scene that feeds him. It’s all designed to save space and minimize. Nearly every wall opens up to reveal dining tables, storage or closets. He says, “Our point is less, but better. We’re not saying no stuff, we’re saying have great stuff that’s really versatile and that you really love.”

                   When he said that last part it clicked with me. Back in the days of that brass pot, I was decorating a home with things that would set an image – we built log furniture and so I bought things that fit with the décor: cabin style stuff like moose candle holders and Indian blankets. But often those things had no meaning. They just matched – it was just stuff. Since then I’ve come to realize how wonderful it is when you surround yourself with things that actually have meaning to you. When the poem on the fridge is one a friend sent in a letter and it means something. When the plant on your shelf is one you rescued when a friend moved. When the pasta bowl set is one you won at a ski race not something you bought at Bed, Bath and Beyond. You get the idea. When you surround yourself with things that have meaning to you, that remind you of people and experiences that are about YOUR life, then the scene you set is all yours.

                   Like Grahm Hill, I’m a firm believer that less is more. Our energy is tied to the things that we own, that we have a stewardship over. Twenty years ago when we sold our house to travel around the country for a year we dumped everything in storage. No matter how far we traveled I could feel my tie to all those belongings. It might sound weird, but I could actually feel them. And every time I clean out and haul boxes to Good Will I feel a release of that energy. I think there probably is something to Grahm’s argument that simplicity and happiness are linked. At the beginning of January in episode 15: 5 Challenges for 30 Days, one of the challenges was to get rid of one thing a day for 30 days. It’s a fun way to start clearing “stuff” out that you don’t need, and if need be, replacing it with something that you really love.

                   I’d love to hear your thoughts on creating our living spaces. What’s worked for you? What hasn’t? Go to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and go to the Contact Us page or leave your comments under this podcast. We can keep the discussion going.

                    

                    

                    

                    

                    

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1621Wed, 29 Mar 2017 09:00:55 -070014:46falsefullWhen a set designer begins to create the layout of the set one of the things they are doing is setting mood and atmosphere. They do this with the layout of the set as well as with the items that are chosen to be present on the set, or in other words, the things we place around us. I love fresh flowers, yummy candles, books, music, and dancing. So I place these things in my living space. I want to talk about this subject of creating our set on purpose because I don’t think it gets talked about much. It’s something we do, some of us do it on purpose, some of us just sorta live where we’re dropped, some of us are too busy with life to focus on actively creating our space, but I think purposeful living and the power that comes in creating atmosphere and place is something worth a twenty-minute conversation. It’s the basis for many of our stories-- scene and set can make a big difference in the energy of the story, the happiness of the characters, and the delight in the space that you control. Tune in...Lori LeeEpisode 027 Multiple Choice Endings – Creating Your Own Story

                    

                   Little Red Riding Hood carefully prepared her basket of 100% whole-wheat rolls, calcium supplements, an all-natural energy drink and some organic sushi for her grandmother. She secured her vibrant red cape around her neck, hopped on her bicycle, and headed through the woods to brighten the day and lighten the load of the elderly matriarch. Stay tuned to find out how the story ends.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it

                   On with the story: As little Red peddled out into traffic heading toward grannies house she noticed other women riders trailing feather boas, mini hula skirts, and pink jerseys. Turns out the riders were moms, cancer survivors, daughters, team riders, professional athletes, and a host of other female descriptors. They rode slow, they road fast, they chatted, they stopped at rest stops, they rode singly and in groups. They rode to raise cancer awareness and to raise money for research. They rode for exercise, for empowerment, for achievement.

                   Red Riding Hood discovered that the non-competitive cycling event was, at the time, the only women-only century in the country.  Though she was very interested in the women she met and the ride that looped through rural and county roads, she cut out early at the turn-off to her grandmother’s. She didn’t get the groovy t-shirt, because of course, she hadn’t registered for the race.

                   Just before she turned off she saw a dark brown blur from the corner of her eye. She turned to see what had darted across the path, but not before a peloton of 10 women riders rode over the top of what Red recognized as a wolf. Hmmm she thought, “I wonder what a wolf is doing out in this part of town.” And with her cape billowing behind her she dodged a rock and rode toward grandmas for a little generational bonding.

                   As Red wove into her grandmother’s drive she noticed there were quite a number of other vehicles. A moped, a tandem bike, two cars, a pick-up and a Jesus truck. The later was a local truck with pictures of Jesus pasted all over it and quoted scriptures prophesying the importance of loving your neighbor. It was a neighborhood anomaly. As she stood her bike against the wall she realized her grandmother’s group for the Coalition for the Protection of Animals was mid-meeting and she probably wasn’t going to get much time with her grandmother. I guess there isn’t going to be time for a game of scrabble tonight, she mused.

                   As she was about to knock on the door, she thought better of it and just turned the knob, and walked in. The door swung open, smooth and quiet, hitting Darren, a local woodsman from the area. He was a real supporter of Granny, as he often stopped by and had lunch with her while working in the nearby woods. There was no hiding that he felt this group was a little extreme, but he showed up every month, probably...]]>

                    

                   Little Red Riding Hood carefully prepared her basket of 100% whole-wheat rolls, calcium supplements, an all-natural energy drink and some organic sushi for her grandmother. She secured her vibrant red cape around her neck, hopped on her bicycle, and headed through the woods to brighten the day and lighten the load of the elderly matriarch. Stay tuned to find out how the story ends.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it

                   On with the story: As little Red peddled out into traffic heading toward grannies house she noticed other women riders trailing feather boas, mini hula skirts, and pink jerseys. Turns out the riders were moms, cancer survivors, daughters, team riders, professional athletes, and a host of other female descriptors. They rode slow, they road fast, they chatted, they stopped at rest stops, they rode singly and in groups. They rode to raise cancer awareness and to raise money for research. They rode for exercise, for empowerment, for achievement.

                   Red Riding Hood discovered that the non-competitive cycling event was, at the time, the only women-only century in the country.  Though she was very interested in the women she met and the ride that looped through rural and county roads, she cut out early at the turn-off to her grandmother’s. She didn’t get the groovy t-shirt, because of course, she hadn’t registered for the race.

                   Just before she turned off she saw a dark brown blur from the corner of her eye. She turned to see what had darted across the path, but not before a peloton of 10 women riders rode over the top of what Red recognized as a wolf. Hmmm she thought, “I wonder what a wolf is doing out in this part of town.” And with her cape billowing behind her she dodged a rock and rode toward grandmas for a little generational bonding.

                   As Red wove into her grandmother’s drive she noticed there were quite a number of other vehicles. A moped, a tandem bike, two cars, a pick-up and a Jesus truck. The later was a local truck with pictures of Jesus pasted all over it and quoted scriptures prophesying the importance of loving your neighbor. It was a neighborhood anomaly. As she stood her bike against the wall she realized her grandmother’s group for the Coalition for the Protection of Animals was mid-meeting and she probably wasn’t going to get much time with her grandmother. I guess there isn’t going to be time for a game of scrabble tonight, she mused.

                   As she was about to knock on the door, she thought better of it and just turned the knob, and walked in. The door swung open, smooth and quiet, hitting Darren, a local woodsman from the area. He was a real supporter of Granny, as he often stopped by and had lunch with her while working in the nearby woods. There was no hiding that he felt this group was a little extreme, but he showed up every month, probably for the fresh fruit smoothies granny made for everyone. They were renowned around town.

                   “Hey Red,” he said, rubbing his arm where the door had smacked him.

                   “Sorry,” Red whispered. Why are you standing so close to the door? Go sit down.”

                   “I don’t know how long I’ll be here. There was a wolf sighting earlier this morning and while I don’t want to announce it to this group, I may have to go assist with animal control.”

                   Red nodded and whispered, “You’re too late. The ladies in the peloton took care of him for you. He’s road kill.”

                   “What?” Darren looked at her askance. “The wolf is dead, out on the road?”

                   “Yup. I don’t mean to sound heartless, but pretty sure it’s seen its day. Those bikers didn’t even slow down.”

                   “Hmmmm,” Darren said, looking thoughtful. “I guess that takes care of that. What have you got in that basket?”

                   “It’s not for you,” she scolded as she smacked his hand away from the lid. “This is for granny and you’re not to touch it. What big, snoopy hands you have.”

                    

                   When I was in elementary school I used to love the “choose-your-ending” books. The story would start and every couple of pages you could decide what the protagonist would do. “If he goes into the cave, turn to page 24. If he turns around and goes back, turn to page 28.” And decision by decision you would take the protagonist to the conclusion of the story. Always with a different ending depending upon the choices your protagonist made, or more accurately, the choices that you made for your protagonist. Never mind that my protagonist almost always died, it was a grand adventure to try and create a story that you could only partially control.

                   Ha! Welcome to real life. Only now the stakes are higher. “If you break off this relationship turn to page 78. If you stay and try to let him work through his abusive behavior turn to page 47.  If you invest your life savings in Trump Towers turn to page 5. If you bought real estate in 2007 turn to page 72. If you try heroin just once, turn to page 189. If you choose porn over a real woman turn to page 69. If you spend time with your kids turn to page 32. If you spend more time at work turn to page 44.

                   The other day I was headed to my company Christmas party. I have no idea what I was thinking about, but I turned left on a green light just as an SUV blew through the intersection. I didn’t see him until my lights were within inches of his car, and he swerved, fast as lightning, and I felt nothing. I pulled over, he pulled over, there was a black smear so thin I could still see my paint through it on my front bumper, but I’d felt nothing. He was in his late twenties, had a week-old baby in his car, and his wife. We each drove away unharmed. I went to my party. He got his family home safe. But what if he’d been a second slower? What if we’d hit, him going at least 45 MPH? There could have been death. There would have been injury. There could have been totaled vehicles and life as we knew it might have changed completely. To drive off, 10 minutes later with nothing but a black smear on my bumper was a miracle that could have had any number of other endings.

                   Sometimes I think back on my life and think what if I hadn’t left my first husband? What if we’d stayed together for the kids? He would have missed out on finding his wife and their sweet little son would never have been born. My subsequent marriages wouldn’t have happened, and that would have been a good thing, but I wouldn’t have learned things – had experiences. It’s also probable that we would have lived in some level of misery that neither of us thrived in. Would we have felt brave or cowardly for not leaving?

                   It gets complex really fast. Complex beyond what we can imagine because relationships create other people who have impact that changes the world. Choices lead to staying put or moving to new places, and the people you meet in those places would never have been a part of your life path, or you a part of there’s if you’d stayed put. Do you? Don’t you? Which choice do you make at the crossroads of your life?

                   In my church, we have what is called a patriarchal blessing. It’s a blessing we believe is inspired by God to guide and direct us throughout our lives. Often it gives clues to how life will unfold if we live well. Well, I reread mine and all I can say is that I got off the path somewhere, because my life doesn’t even partially align with that blessing. One day I was feeling really badly about this. Had I blown it? Had I really missed all the things I was supposed to do, missed my calling because I had turned to page 28 and entered the cave instead of turning around….a time or two? Which turn off had been the one to get me completely lost in the woods? Or was it a little of all of them? I called my life coach, who is not of my religious persuasion, and while I was nervous to tell her my thoughts I desperately needed someone to talk it over with. Being single I don’t have a spouse to discuss this type of thing with, and I’m not going to talk to my kids about where my life went off course, so I called her. She gave me words of wisdom that I will forever hold dear. She said, “Lori , God doesn’t need people who don’t make mistakes. He uses people who have experience, who have gained empathy and understanding through living. To touch others you must be able to relate, and life will do that for you.”

                   Elisabeth Kubler Ross said, “The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness and a deep loving concern.  Beautiful people do not just happen.”

                   In the story told earlier Little Red Riding Hood will never know what it’s like to be eaten by the wolf, because a peloton of bikers chose to run him over before he got into the woods and to grandmother’s house. She will go on to live a life, never knowing how close she came to another experience entirely.

                   I have no idea what would have happened if my car would have collided with the other gentleman’s on that snowy pre-Christmas night, and I’ll go on living, be grateful for my car and that we are all in one piece, but truly we’ll forget about it soon enough, never knowing what that page might have said.

                   A few years ago I was riding my road bike and was stopped at a stop light. Right before the light changed my music bleeped out and I stopped to pull out my phone and see what was going on. That five seconds saved my life because without the music blip I would have launched off the line when the light changed and plunged into traffic, just as a man in a huge Dodge truck ran the red light and plowed through the intersection at 60 miles an hour. He would have smashed me between the car on the other side of me and there would have been very little to recover. What if?

                   As I mentioned earlier, in the choose-your-own-ending stories I always ended up dead. So, I believe my guardian angels are probably working over time, and because of that I have been saved from many a fiasco. There was the time I was dropped 100 feet from a rock climb, but lived. There was the time a drunk driver hit me head on going 65 MPH, and I walked away without injury. There is every time I bike down steep mountain trails and fly over my handle bars, only to get back up and ride another day. Who knows how many times the wolf got killed before he came to my house? Nobody knows.

                   While there are many things we do not control. There are also many places in our stories where there is no one to make our choices but us. There have been a few times I’ve wished someone else could make the hard choices. That someone else would say, “turn to page 76,” because I’m afraid of making that call. But in the end, we get to choose our own endings, and we do that every day with the decisions we make. And, just like we talk about in episode 8, it’s gonna be messy. There’s no way around that, but we become the “beautiful people” that Kubler Ross talked about earlier, because we get in the arena and we engage in life. We make the best choices we know how to make at the time. We walk into the cave or we walk away. We go into the forest or we chose a different route. But we also get to see ourselves with compassion for those choices that in hindsight seem a lot clearer than they did in the fog of the struggle. A million things can happen to us every day. We get to control some of them, we don’t get to control others. We have no idea how much assistance we are receiving from our guardian angels, and there is no way to know about the “What-ifs.” But what we do get to do is take responsibility for our choices, we get to choose big and exciting options, we get to be brave and sometimes foolhardy. We get to turn the page and see what happens, and when we make choices we regret, we get to show compassion for ourselves in that past moment, knowing we did the best we could, and then trying again.

                   Real big-boy and big-girl life is a choose-your-own-ending storybook. You are the protagonist. You make the choices. You take responsibility for those choices, learn from them, love yourself through the bad ones, and think big! Create your own adventure. We all end up dead in the end anyway.

                   This week’s challenge is to consider a life choice that you made, that you have regrets about. Show your past self-compassion for that choice to turn to page 54, when in hindsight you now wish you would have turned to page 72. Be gentle with the past you who did the best you could at the time.

                   Have fun out there telling your stories and we’ll see you next week on the love your story podcast. Don’t forget to share this podcast with a friend. It’s always a good idea to share empowerment.

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1604Wed, 22 Mar 2017 09:00:33 -070016:27falsefullWhen I was in elementary school I used to love the “choose-your-ending” books. The story would start and every couple of pages you could decide what the protagonist would do. “If he goes into the cave, turn to page 24. If he turns around and goes back, turn to page 28.” And decision by decision you would take the protagonist to the conclusion of the story. Always with a different ending depending upon the choices your protagonist made, or more accurately, the choices that you made for your protagonist. Join us today for some thoughts on creating your own adventure.Lori LeeEpisode 026 Self Love – Interview with Natalie Kristine Burrage, Love Yoga Flow Studio Owner and Self-Love Coach

                   Today we have a special guest: Natalie Kristine Burrage - a specialist and coach in loving yourself.

                   Bio: Love Yoga Flow Studio Owner, Yoga Teacher, and Self-proclaimed Creation Catalyst, Natalie Burrage loves to empower her clients from shifting from the trauma and drama of life into a space of purposeful and fun creation so they can create the life they've desired! Empowering her students with self-love is key as she watches them create the love, the money, the happiness, and the life they've been longing for. She often says that people hire her who are ready to get off the merry go round of self-delusion and temporary fixes and actually step into truth, empowerment, and doing whatever it takes (including fun!) to get the results they weren't previously able to create on their own.

                    

                   To contact Natalie:

                   https://www.instagram.com/natalie_burrage/https://www.facebook.com/thenatalieb/

                   https://twitter.com/NatalieBurrage

                   https://www.facebook.com/thenatalieb/https://twitter.com/NatalieBurrage

                   Leave your comments and thoughts below! We'd love to hear them.

                   ]]>

                   Today we have a special guest: Natalie Kristine Burrage - a specialist and coach in loving yourself.

                   Bio: Love Yoga Flow Studio Owner, Yoga Teacher, and Self-proclaimed Creation Catalyst, Natalie Burrage loves to empower her clients from shifting from the trauma and drama of life into a space of purposeful and fun creation so they can create the life they've desired! Empowering her students with self-love is key as she watches them create the love, the money, the happiness, and the life they've been longing for. She often says that people hire her who are ready to get off the merry go round of self-delusion and temporary fixes and actually step into truth, empowerment, and doing whatever it takes (including fun!) to get the results they weren't previously able to create on their own.

                    

                   To contact Natalie:

                   https://www.instagram.com/natalie_burrage/https://www.facebook.com/thenatalieb/

                   https://twitter.com/NatalieBurrage

                   https://www.facebook.com/thenatalieb/https://twitter.com/NatalieBurrage

                   Leave your comments and thoughts below! We'd love to hear them.

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1597Wed, 15 Mar 2017 09:00:06 -070024:37falsefullJoin us today for words of wisdom from the self-love guru Natalie Kristine Burrage. Loving your story and loving yourself are so closely aligned it's hard to separate one from the other, so an expert on self-love is just the ticket. How does Natalie see the world and the people around her? What are her tips for leaning into a space of loving and appreciating yourself? Why is this one of the most important things you can do for the world and yourself? Listen and find out...Lori LeeEpisode 025 – Three Stories about Three BikesThree Stories about Three Bikes

                   In the words of Dr. Seuss, “Oh the places you’ll go! There is fun to be done! There are points to be scored. There are games to be won.” Join us this week for a few stories about bikes, and the lessons they taught me about life.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee and I’m excited about for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. The power of story serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   A bike is a little like a dog. You are companions. Together you go places, you see things, and though you hopefully aren’t walking your bike too often, you are taking each other out and about for a little bit of exercise and scenery. A bike needs a ride like a dog needs a walk—okay, granted, I’m stretching the simile here. The bike needs TLC: oil and wipe-downs after a muddy day out.  It is through this relationship, this closeness, that I can tell you some stories of exploration, escape, and thrill. Though the bike wasn’t always the same, it is the bike beneath me that allows for the adventure, the experience, and the lesson.

                   The Traveler’s Bike

                   Do you believe that if you think about something with enough intent that it will eventually come to you? After my divorce,  I watched the movie, Under the Tuscan Sun and fell in love with the idea of Italy. I’ve learned that I can’t travel to new places without a mountain to climb, a trail to bike, or a river to paddle.  For me to truly feel a place, I need to hear the voice of God in the natural environment-I need to sweat and interact with the land, and so I began to picture myself biking across the Tuscan countryside. I didn’t picture the details of how it would come about, just the nodding yellow sunflowers, the ancient olive orchards, the expanse of leafy vineyards, the rolling Tuscan hills, and century-old, rock farm houses that dot the crests in the photos of Tuscany.

                   Before long my chance manifested in a writing assignment for a magazine, and  I ran my hands along the walls of the Tuscan Brunello wine cellars, sat at authentic Italian7-course dinners, took elementary language lessons from our Italian guides, enjoyed Italian cooking lessons from Italian locals, and took in the IlGran Fondo de Brunello (which I’m probably totally slaughtering the pronunciation)– a 36 kilometer mountain bike race whose 1021 participants that year, consisted almost completely of men. And instead of getting a t-shirt at registration you get a bottle of wine—so very Italian.

                   This was Italy. The cars so tiny, the washing machines so tiny. The old stone cities so empty. The countryside so rich and vast and beautiful. This was definitely not America. But, American women cluster the Italian kitchen in our old rented stone farmhouse. We slice tomatoes, fresh mozzarella, beets, parmesan, basil, and cucumber. The soundtrack to Mama Mia plays behind us while Federico Marconi makes pizza, and the deep, reverberating hum of the women all talking at once takes stage front. Corks pop and trays of food are laden with the colors of red tomatoes, white mozzarella, green pesto, and golden breads.  One woman wears a t-shirt with a bike across the chest, another has wet hair from her shower following the daily ride along the roads that pass vineyards drooping deep purple grapes that await their transformation into Brunello. We dance, swing our hips to the music while we work.

                   Each morning we bike down a steep gravel road that leads from our stone apartments, past carefully groomed vineyards, to the paved road below that winds through the Tuscan countryside. We bike to thermal spas, to old, stone, neighboring cities, to café’s...]]>Three Stories about Three Bikes

                   In the words of Dr. Seuss, “Oh the places you’ll go! There is fun to be done! There are points to be scored. There are games to be won.” Join us this week for a few stories about bikes, and the lessons they taught me about life.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee and I’m excited about for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. The power of story serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   A bike is a little like a dog. You are companions. Together you go places, you see things, and though you hopefully aren’t walking your bike too often, you are taking each other out and about for a little bit of exercise and scenery. A bike needs a ride like a dog needs a walk—okay, granted, I’m stretching the simile here. The bike needs TLC: oil and wipe-downs after a muddy day out.  It is through this relationship, this closeness, that I can tell you some stories of exploration, escape, and thrill. Though the bike wasn’t always the same, it is the bike beneath me that allows for the adventure, the experience, and the lesson.

                   The Traveler’s Bike

                   Do you believe that if you think about something with enough intent that it will eventually come to you? After my divorce,  I watched the movie, Under the Tuscan Sun and fell in love with the idea of Italy. I’ve learned that I can’t travel to new places without a mountain to climb, a trail to bike, or a river to paddle.  For me to truly feel a place, I need to hear the voice of God in the natural environment-I need to sweat and interact with the land, and so I began to picture myself biking across the Tuscan countryside. I didn’t picture the details of how it would come about, just the nodding yellow sunflowers, the ancient olive orchards, the expanse of leafy vineyards, the rolling Tuscan hills, and century-old, rock farm houses that dot the crests in the photos of Tuscany.

                   Before long my chance manifested in a writing assignment for a magazine, and  I ran my hands along the walls of the Tuscan Brunello wine cellars, sat at authentic Italian7-course dinners, took elementary language lessons from our Italian guides, enjoyed Italian cooking lessons from Italian locals, and took in the IlGran Fondo de Brunello (which I’m probably totally slaughtering the pronunciation)– a 36 kilometer mountain bike race whose 1021 participants that year, consisted almost completely of men. And instead of getting a t-shirt at registration you get a bottle of wine—so very Italian.

                   This was Italy. The cars so tiny, the washing machines so tiny. The old stone cities so empty. The countryside so rich and vast and beautiful. This was definitely not America. But, American women cluster the Italian kitchen in our old rented stone farmhouse. We slice tomatoes, fresh mozzarella, beets, parmesan, basil, and cucumber. The soundtrack to Mama Mia plays behind us while Federico Marconi makes pizza, and the deep, reverberating hum of the women all talking at once takes stage front. Corks pop and trays of food are laden with the colors of red tomatoes, white mozzarella, green pesto, and golden breads.  One woman wears a t-shirt with a bike across the chest, another has wet hair from her shower following the daily ride along the roads that pass vineyards drooping deep purple grapes that await their transformation into Brunello. We dance, swing our hips to the music while we work.

                   Each morning we bike down a steep gravel road that leads from our stone apartments, past carefully groomed vineyards, to the paved road below that winds through the Tuscan countryside. We bike to thermal spas, to old, stone, neighboring cities, to café’s for thimbles of coffee and gelato, to an abbey that hails from 1100 A.D, to wine cellars with grand barrels made of special woods, and back to the steep dirt road and back to the farm house.  One day we found Antonello, the handsome Italian doctor, at the thermal spas where we donned swimming caps and floated in the green mineral waters while looking across the valley at the Roca D’Orcia. In theory, all romantic trips to Italy should include some handsome Italian man. We found one. Clad in his European Speedo®, stretched out in the fading sun his tan body drawing stares. He spoke no English and I no Italian, so over his coffee and my juice we lilted through language lessons and found a few words we understood. I learned the Italian equivalent of 911 is 118. I learned how to say red and green in Italian. I learned how to pronounce valley and river, and that no matter how efficient one might be at witty repartee in their own language the skill evades you when you can’t speak the language of another. When he left he grabbed my face and planted a kiss on each cheek, followed by a purposeful kiss on the mouth.  Ahhhh… Italian gifts.

                   I do a lot of observing. In Saint Augustine’s words, I read a new page of the world. I watch these women, ages 36-72. They are quirky. Their marital status varies. They are blond, gray, brunette. Some have conservative views, some liberal. Body shapes vary, jobs and experiences are vastly different, and they hail from different parts of the U.S. But what they have in common is the way they pour themselves into this time and place. They are all bright in their individuality and each is richer because of all the variety that surrounds them in their comrades. Over dinner, Rosetta, our Italian cook, tells us her story of young marriage, years of servitude in her in-laws home, a son with cancer and a husband who keeps her young because every day he “brings her the water she needs to be a flower.”  Before she leaves she stands near the fireplace, and unprompted, opens her soul and sings to us in Italian with a voice of power and beauty no one expected. The applause rocks the old restored farm house and we beg for another. I reverently applaud the sharing. The sharing going on between everyone.

                   Tiger Lily

                   A bike is made up of an axle, bar ends, bar plugs, bearings, bottom bracket, brake, brake lever, brake shifter, cable, cassette, chain, a chain ring, a cog set, a derailleur, a down tube, a fork… I could go on all the way through the alphabet to wing-nut, but you get the idea. Lots of parts and pieces come together to make this thing we call a bicycle, and then we get on, ride like hell down the mountain, bouncing or jumping over rocks, roots, and logs, hoping to stay seated. Sometimes I do, sometimes I don’t. I have the scars to prove it. When I’m on the road the obstacles are less invasive, unless you count all the cars and bad drivers. One must keep an eye out for stray paraphernalia tossed into the street, for pot holes and ground-hole covers. I learned the hard way that gravel on the road is not my friend. At 10 years-old I saddle up Tiger Lily, (the name written on the side in swooping black letters) and take off from my house, on the one-mile ride to school, racing my father in his old Chevy truck. The wind blows through my long brown curls and my pink bell bottoms flap against the chain cover, my legs like pistons. I am ahead! As my father catches me and pulls up beside me I increased my speed, giving it my last and best effort while I guide my bike off the road and onto the shoulder to let him pass. Here, my tire kisses gravel, meets one big rock that I thought I’d roll over but didn’t. Here, I do my first face plant sailing over the front of my handlebars, body skidding across the gravel, my Holly Hobby outfit dirty and torn, my face streaked with blood and tears. Dad picks me up,—a crushed sparrow–loads me in the old truck and takes me home for first-aid and repair. My days as a bicycle racer screech to a halt.

                   We learn to fly in different ways. Unfortunately, mine is still often over the front of my handlebars. After the “Tiger Lily fiasco” I didn’t ride a bike seriously again until I was in my 20’s. It was the mid 90’s and mountain biking blazed onto the scene as the cool outdoor thing to do in college. My future husband, two mountain bikes (mine desperately old, his hippy chic with stickers and a collage of parts) and the wide mountain roads pulled me back onto the saddle. He patiently watched me ride my brakes when he could have been speeding down hills, but this push, this faith, this desire not to be the weak link kept me riding for the next 20 years–road and mountain bikes–finally ending up at the place where a good downhill speed run over roots and rocks and switchbacks is the reason I get on the bike. This is where fun and I embrace. But it is also on those tight switchbacks and rock covered trails that I find myself, seasonally, flying over the handlebars and onto the trail ahead. It’s been suggested I must not have the skill to stay on my bike, while I suggest that if they are always astride their bike they must not be pushing themselves hard enough. I’m sure they are right, but so am I. Overcoming fear to feel the thrill of living at the edge of your ability, to feel the wind across your skin, to engage with life. This is mind, body, and spirit engaging in living and there is no other way to do it.  All that being said, given my choice I’d rather stay on my bike.

                   The Old Red Bike

                   I wrangled the old bike, too large of a frame for my 5’6” body, into the back of our old van. This guy I knew had an older sister who used to ride, or some such thing, and this old piece of metal and gears was sitting in his parent’s garage unused and unloved. It was a bit antique but appealingly red, and free. A road bike with gears and all the things it needed to work, it found a new home, a new chain, and a little elbow grease.  Nothing here oil and water couldn’t clean up. I hauled the bike 30 miles to the little, rural town my young husband and I had moved to, the rural town that was driving me nuts with nothing to do and people I didn’t know, who knew way too much about me. Population 4371. Maybe the bike was about picking up a new sport, or finding things in common with my friends, but I suspect it was really about escape – escape from that little town on the Idaho border .

                   On went my black spandex shorts, my less than chic helmet, and off I rode down the two-lane highway, away from Hickville, 30 miles to my mother’s house and the “city”. My husband picked me up there on his way home from work on the days I rode in. “I’m impressed,” he said one day. “I think it’s really cool that you get on that old bike and ride so far. That’s a serious workout.”  And one day he surprised me with a bright yellow road bike, not excessively fancy, but it was new and it fit. No more standing on my tippy toes to straddle the frame, or swinging my leg over before the bike stopped and I accidentally landed a bar to the crotch. I was touched that he was impressed, touched by his support, and touched by the new yellow bike that we couldn’t afford.

                   I kept riding that bike until I was writing articles and bike reviews for the trade industry magazine and I finagled a discount on the latest and greatest women-specific road bike of my choice. I road to keep my sanity until I left Hickville. I sometimes still ride to keep my sanity when my children have my insides all tied in knots. But now I mostly ride for exercise, speed, the thrill and the bragging rights. In fact, it’s gotten to the point that if I don’t ride I feel guilty. –I still haven’t figured that one out. It’s come full circle, from Tiger Lily and the thrill of speed to my Specialized bikes and the thrill of speed. But there is something else the bike has taught me. When teaching someone to ride a bike one of the first jewels of information you crown upon their helmeted heads is the concept of looking where you want to go. It sounds simple, but when you’re riding on a thin trail and there is a drop-off to the side, be it 3 feet or 100 feet, don’t at the drop-off. The simple fact is that your bike tire tends to follow your line of sight. If there is a big rock in the trail, for heaven’s sake don’t look at the rock, look at the path you want to take around the rock. Look where you want your front tire to go. Look ahead, think forward, the bike moves fast and your bike will follow the path you focus on, just like life does. If you don’t want to hit the tree, don’t look at the tree. If you don’t want to go off the cliff, don’t look off the cliff. I think this is a universal law that rears its head in every self-help book, video, and workshop on the planet. But with a bike you see immediate, and I mean immediate results.

                   When I looked for Tuscany I found it—on a bike.  Without a dividing car window I saw the rich eggplant purples, the sunflower yellows, the burnt sienna and baby blue skies first hand, felt the warm Italian air across my face as I peddled through the summer afternoons, touched the cold, hard cobblestones that have snuggled the ground for at least twenty of my lifetimes. My bikes help me push limits, engage with space, time and living. Finding speed, learning to get up when I get bucked off. This is also a way of engaging with life. When I looked for a way to save my sanity I found that old red bike, my ticket to a hundred other days; a hundred other rides; a lifetime of pushing myself over broad expanses of road; and of exhausted legs and lungs that made me feel like I’d done something worthwhile. I’ve learned not to look off the cliff I don’t want to ride off – instead I look at the trail ahead, the one that takes me up the mountain, to the overlook, the one where you can see the sunrise over the world or the view over the valley, or simply the view you actually want to see. The bike is the partner,  the means, the vehicle, the tool. It IS about the bike for me, and it isn’t.

                   This week I challenge you to look forward – look where you want to go. Stop thinking about the past. Don’t look at the root or rock in the path – look around it. Push yourself a little and enjoy the ride. Have fun out there creating adventures and stories – they are the same thing really. We’ll see you next week on the Love Your Story podcast. Please head to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and leave us some feedback. We’d love to hear from you. Share your stories – Maybe we’ll use them in a podcast.

                    

                    

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1588Wed, 08 Mar 2017 09:00:52 -070018:02falsefullI’ve learned not to look off the cliff I don’t want to ride off – instead, I look at the trail ahead. It's that trail that takes you away from the past and up to the overlook with the scenic view. When you bike you don't look backward - you must look forward. The bike is the partner, the means, the vehicle, the tool for embarking on the journey, but it's the lessons you learn along the way that makes the story rich. It IS about the bike for me, and it isn’t.Lori LeeEpisode 024 All You Need is LoveChoose Love

                   Martin Luther King Jr. said, “Darkness can’t drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate can’t drive out hate; only LOVE can do that.” Join us today for a discussion on love. While love is always needed, always in style, now more than ever in our crazy and torn world, we need to talk about love. We need to share stories about love.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Last week we heard from Marvin Cassler – a man who is creating a crazy, out-of-the-box story, just exactly the way he wants it to be. Listen to that episode to see an example of someone who knows how to purposefully write his very own story. This week we’re going to delve into the topic of love. I’ll be honest, writing this podcast stresses me out because love is my favorite topic. It’s my favorite because it’s the answer to everything. It’s one of the things that I really, really believe in and that I’m always trying to do better. So this podcast needs to be good. No, it needs to be great, and that type of pressure makes me want to walk away for fear that I cannot do it justice. I probably can’t, but because it’s important, let’s talk about it, and let’s roll around in some love.

                   In the book Lost in Translation it says, “Love alone is capable of uniting living beings in such a way as to complete and fulfill them, for it alone takes them and joins them by what is deepest in themselves. This is a fact of daily experience.”

                   This daily experience makes Love a loaded word. Meanings implied and created from media, from nurture, from experience. It is the thing we crave more than anything else and it is often one of the most difficult things we engage in. It provides the utmost joy and the utmost pain. A few have had real transcendental experiences where they were filled with the love of God and actually know what that feels like, an elixir they’ll do anything to get more of, but most of us look to one another, a bunch of other imperfect people, who are also looking for love, and then in the mess, everyone tries to feel and be filled. It is the burnished space of this hunger that we all function from, often looking for someone to fill us so we can reciprocate, but this is a fool’s errand. Love begets love. Hunger does not beget love. There are many facets on the diamond of love. Love of a parent is different than love for a friend, which is different than love for a lover. There is the mature choice to love a person when the hunger transitions into familiarity. Love for mankind because of our connection, love of chocolate, love of a dear pet.

                   When Christ was asked, in the New Testament, what the most important commandment was, he explained that the first commandment was to love God and the second was to love your neighbor as yourself. I don’t know about you, but I’m often thinking about how things will affect me and my family before I consider how it’s going to affect the guy next door. Of course, when the term “neighbor” is used, Christ was referring to all around us – to our other fellow humans here riding this rock around the sun. The older I’ve gotten and the more I practice this, the better I get at thinking win/win for everyone. Coming from a place of love and acceptance without judgment, but it’s something I’m always trying to do a little better. When someone on Facebook really irritates me it’s easy to pass quick judgment. I have to stop and remind myself to love. When I want that parking spot that’s close to the front door and I can make it in before the other person...]]>Choose Love

                   Martin Luther King Jr. said, “Darkness can’t drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate can’t drive out hate; only LOVE can do that.” Join us today for a discussion on love. While love is always needed, always in style, now more than ever in our crazy and torn world, we need to talk about love. We need to share stories about love.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Last week we heard from Marvin Cassler – a man who is creating a crazy, out-of-the-box story, just exactly the way he wants it to be. Listen to that episode to see an example of someone who knows how to purposefully write his very own story. This week we’re going to delve into the topic of love. I’ll be honest, writing this podcast stresses me out because love is my favorite topic. It’s my favorite because it’s the answer to everything. It’s one of the things that I really, really believe in and that I’m always trying to do better. So this podcast needs to be good. No, it needs to be great, and that type of pressure makes me want to walk away for fear that I cannot do it justice. I probably can’t, but because it’s important, let’s talk about it, and let’s roll around in some love.

                   In the book Lost in Translation it says, “Love alone is capable of uniting living beings in such a way as to complete and fulfill them, for it alone takes them and joins them by what is deepest in themselves. This is a fact of daily experience.”

                   This daily experience makes Love a loaded word. Meanings implied and created from media, from nurture, from experience. It is the thing we crave more than anything else and it is often one of the most difficult things we engage in. It provides the utmost joy and the utmost pain. A few have had real transcendental experiences where they were filled with the love of God and actually know what that feels like, an elixir they’ll do anything to get more of, but most of us look to one another, a bunch of other imperfect people, who are also looking for love, and then in the mess, everyone tries to feel and be filled. It is the burnished space of this hunger that we all function from, often looking for someone to fill us so we can reciprocate, but this is a fool’s errand. Love begets love. Hunger does not beget love. There are many facets on the diamond of love. Love of a parent is different than love for a friend, which is different than love for a lover. There is the mature choice to love a person when the hunger transitions into familiarity. Love for mankind because of our connection, love of chocolate, love of a dear pet.

                   When Christ was asked, in the New Testament, what the most important commandment was, he explained that the first commandment was to love God and the second was to love your neighbor as yourself. I don’t know about you, but I’m often thinking about how things will affect me and my family before I consider how it’s going to affect the guy next door. Of course, when the term “neighbor” is used, Christ was referring to all around us – to our other fellow humans here riding this rock around the sun. The older I’ve gotten and the more I practice this, the better I get at thinking win/win for everyone. Coming from a place of love and acceptance without judgment, but it’s something I’m always trying to do a little better. When someone on Facebook really irritates me it’s easy to pass quick judgment. I have to stop and remind myself to love. When I want that parking spot that’s close to the front door and I can make it in before the other person vying for the spot – well, last week I had to make the conscious decision to let the guy who had his blinker on first take the spot, when I could have snaked it. I know, small, but it’s these small daily decisions that define how we live. The other day a friend on FB was really lashing out politically. His content was negative, fearful and attacking. I decided I was just going to more or less because he was really broiled in a nasty swirl I didn’t want anything to do with, but then I was taught a lesson by another joint friend who called him, reached out and showed love instead of frustration and judgment. I learned from her example. From the very mouth of Christ, we are taught that love is the most important thing we can do while we are here. But let me take it a step further. Charity, which is often interpreted to mean giving something to help someone else – like taking someone dinner when they are sick, or giving a dollar to a beggar, is actually much more than that. Charity is the PURE LOVE of Christ. It is a love that fully encompasses us unconditionally. While this is understandably hard for us to do, we get to practice it and try to understand it because truly it is the basis for where we are whole, where others can be whole, where we heal, where we grow, where we become and how we can truly bless.

                   1 Corinthians 13 Paul clears everything else out of the way when he discusses the importance of love. It says, “Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity (pure love of Christ), I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal. And, though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing. And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I have my body to be burned, and have not charity it profited me nothing.” Without Charity – which is the pure love of Christ—we are nothing. Not even if we have great spiritual gifts and faith enough to move mountains – those are powerful things! But without unconditional love for our fellow men, we are nothing.  Clearly, real love, the best we can muster, trumps everything else. This is why it’s my favorite. When there are a hundred things I am supposed to be doing right, and I’m overwhelmed with the long list of great qualities I should possess, I just toss them aside and come back to love, because if I can get that one right I can figure out the moving mountains and speaking in tongues thing down the road—and besides, learning how to love is a pretty awesome thing all on its own.

                   We often think of love as a feeling. A feeling we either have or we don’t have. May I propose that love is not just a feeling, it’s a choice. It’s an action instead of a reaction. Often, when one thinks of love, they think of romantic love. The intensity, the perfection, the rush, the hope. Well, even romantic love gets real, sooner or later, and at that point, love becomes a choice. You choose to love a real person who sometimes irritates you. A person who isn’t always thoughtful. A person who can’t read your mind and address your every emotional need. At that point, when you see the warts and things get real, you choose to love them for who they are, or your don’t.

                   There is also an unconditional love that can be extended to those around us. I did an extended three month VIP emotional training course with 44 other people from around the country. When we started we didn’t know each other well. We got to work closely in groups, we got to know one another’s weaknesses and insecurities, we got to watch each other fail and succeed. Of course, in a group that size everyone isn’t going to like everyone. There are lots of personality types and there will always be a few folks that you’re going to want to strangle. There will be some folks that you don’t respect very much. There are likely to be a few that you would never interact with in your normal life. People with different belief systems, different levels of effective functioning, it was just people – in all their real and messy glory. Well, part of our motto was that we were looking to create win/win for everyone. No man left behind. We all had a voice, we all were responsible and we all got to play team. This means that I got to be in groups where I threw my hands in the air because I didn’t understand how this person or that person could be so low functioning. I got to resist writing others off, and I got to overcome the desire to ignore others for whom I could see no good coming from the interaction. It was a process, but by the end of that three months, I had learned to accept, love, and reign in judgment for every one of those beloved people. I learned to love. It wasn’t a feeling – it was a choice. It was a choice not to judge, it was a choice to look for strengths instead of weaknesses, it was a choice to allow greater diversity in thinking, life approaches, and personality types. It was lovely. It was powerful.

                   What does love look like? I took an informal survey – I asked people for a time they remembered feeling loved.

                   Michael said, “It was in the Fall of 1986.  We sat in a Buick Skylark, and from the passenger seat, she looked at me and sang with the radio “and that’s why I love you”. And that’s why we should always show our true colors. I giggled at him and asked if he was serious. “Totally,” he said.

                   Michael’s a musician. Music has always been a language for him, and in this case, a language of love.

                   Mary said, I felt loved when my young husband learned, (in 1974) that I had dyslexia and struggled with keeping a check book and making change, and he was so kind. I hid it from him for years and when he finally found out, he was so kind and praised me for being so incredibly successful while hiding this seemingly impossible challenge.  His understanding and support spoke love.

                   Constance said, “When my Dad passed away and my husband’s law enforcement brothers/sisters all showed up, even though none of them knew him. They did it just out of love and respect for us!  Support translated into love.

                   Sally shared, “Last year after my husband passed, a lady in my church gave me a hug and asked if I were OK. She told me how important I was to the congregation and if I was sad they were all sad. This beautiful lady passed away two weeks ago but will always hold a dear place in my heart.”  Her words – if you’re sad, we’re all sad, show a willingness to walk with the down-trodden, to share one another’s burdens—this is love in action.

                   In our crazy, chaotic world today there is a lot of active resistance to love because fear has become a huge dark cloud rolling over the United States, as well as the other countries for which the policies of the US have great effect. Now more than ever we need to release resistance. Return to love. Release old thought systems that don’t come from a place of love, and surrender to new ways of being. Surrender to love as often as possible, like Martin Luther King said, hate can’t drive out hate. Let love overcome fear.

                   I say this because fear is a real power. Fear generates hatred. It creates reaction. Fear stops the creation of connection; fear stops love. And there is a lot of fear going on right now in our country.

                   We all long for connection. Marvin Cassler talked about it in episode 23 – how on the trail or at the game as a Super Fan, the meaning was often found in the people he met. In episode 19 we talked about how vulnerability allows us to create connection with one another. In many episodes we’ve talked about fear and how important it is not to let it hold us back from becoming our best selves. Well, all of that rolls into a space we must stretch into, which is to try to understand people and cultures we are not familiar with, and to which we might have fear. In the interview with Lynne McNeill – episode 16, folklore professor at USU, we talked about how an outsider must listen to the stories of other cultures and peoples, other families, and groups of people before they can ever hope to understand where they come from. How important it is to be so very careful with allowing judgments to close off our hearts.

                   Well, I have some great news! Not one of us has to pass judgment on or decide on another’s worthiness. God has said, judge not that ye be not judged, and he’s also said NOTHING is more important than loving each other. How wonderful is that?! He’s taken the dirty job out of our hands and given us the job to find the beauty and light in each other. He’s told us to cultivate love and acceptance, even as we would have for ourselves.

                   We are all heroes finding our way through our story. At different times we each stumble, at different times we excel. But if we are there to give a hand, to bear one another’s burdens during the stumbling, and to celebrate with one another during the exultant times, we will move farther and faster and more joyfully together. And, thank God that you don’t need to be anyone’s judge and jury. Just their friend. It makes life a whole lot easier.

                   While Hollywood weaves tales of passion, and movie stars and sports heroes discard spouses as convenience and irritation dictate, our models for love are often terribly flawed. When children get to watch fathers and mothers and other models choose love, choose selflessness in caring for another, they then have options beyond the stories told in the tabloids and on the movie screen. I’m not suggesting that choosing love is always easy. It often is not. But I am saying it IS a choice to choose. To act rather than to react, and that is in your control. You don’t “feel” the love anymore? Our thoughts generate our feelings. It’s so hard to take that much responsibility sometimes, but if you’re not feeling the love, try extending love – finding genuine things to compliment your beloved, on non-beloved, on. Try appreciation. Try encouragement. Try understanding. Love creates love. Gentleness and support, selflessness and mercy go much farther than critical or condemning words. Keeping score how about who did what is more of a business move than a loving move. What if your beloved showed you mercy rather than insisted on justice. How would that make you feel? Can you extend that to another? What if your neighbor reserved judgment and extended genuine friendship and support? Can you do that?

                   It’s true that love is a balm and a roller coaster and a mountain to climb. Love is speed. Love is a calm day. Love is a choice. Love is an anthem for the soul, love is a hunger, a knife, a space of giving, of bravery, of opening. Love is the greatest work of the heart. Love is not for the weak or the cowardly. Love is God and God is love and you and I are part of this very stuff, and in a way are we not then just trying, day by day, to know our true selves better and in so doing see the face of God and know our neighbor, our lover, our child, our parent, our friend, a stranger?

                   Go out there and love someone today. Don’t wait for someone to love you – love them first. Love begets love! Get YOUR LOVE OUT INTO THE WORLD! Reserve judgment. Allow for other ways of thinking and being. Find the strengths in those around you, not the weakness. Extend mercy, appreciation, and maybe just sing a love song to someone. Because you can, because that’s your true colors!

                   See you next week on the love your story podcast. Have a good time creating some loving stories. And, please – go to www.loveyourstorypodcast and give us some feedback. We want to hear your thoughts and stories.

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1584Wed, 01 Mar 2017 09:00:39 -070019:01falsefullMartin Luther King Jr. said, "Darkness can't drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate can't drive out hate; only LOVE can do that." Join us today for a discussion on love. While love is always needed, always in style, now more than ever in our crazy and torn world, we need to talk about love. We need to share stories about love.Lori LeeEpisode 023 Live Life on Your Own Terms – Interview with Marvin Cassler, Section hiker and Super fanWelcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Today, episode 23, I want to introduce you to Marvin Cassler. I found Marvin sitting at a booth representing the Pacific Coast Trail – also known as the PCT. This trail starts at the Mexican border and climbs straight up the US to the Canadian border. Endurance. Perseverance. Perspective. These are at the heart of every Pacific Crest Trail journey. It’s a place where people discover not only the trail, but what they have inside themselves. And, as it turns out, Marvin has not only hiked 1025 miles of this trail, but he’s also hiked 3200 miles of the Continental Divide Trail, 800 miles of the Arizon Trail, and 500 miles of the Colorado trail. He calls himself a section hiker and today he’s with us to talk about the very purposeful creation of the exact life he wants to live. Hi Marvin….

                   So you are known by a lot of names: Marvin Assler, Mr. Cassler by your 3^rd graders (Oh ya, he’s a third-grade teacher too), Maverik is your hiking name, and KoKo – why so many names?

                   Listen to the podcast for the rest of this interview…

                   If you’d like to get in touch with Marvin Cassler you can find him on Facebook:

                   https://www.facebook.com/cassler

                   Go to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and share your thoughts and stories.

                   ]]>Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Today, episode 23, I want to introduce you to Marvin Cassler. I found Marvin sitting at a booth representing the Pacific Coast Trail – also known as the PCT. This trail starts at the Mexican border and climbs straight up the US to the Canadian border. Endurance. Perseverance. Perspective. These are at the heart of every Pacific Crest Trail journey. It’s a place where people discover not only the trail, but what they have inside themselves. And, as it turns out, Marvin has not only hiked 1025 miles of this trail, but he’s also hiked 3200 miles of the Continental Divide Trail, 800 miles of the Arizon Trail, and 500 miles of the Colorado trail. He calls himself a section hiker and today he’s with us to talk about the very purposeful creation of the exact life he wants to live. Hi Marvin….

                   So you are known by a lot of names: Marvin Assler, Mr. Cassler by your 3^rd graders (Oh ya, he’s a third-grade teacher too), Maverik is your hiking name, and KoKo – why so many names?

                   Listen to the podcast for the rest of this interview…

                   If you’d like to get in touch with Marvin Cassler you can find him on Facebook:

                   https://www.facebook.com/cassler

                   Go to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and share your thoughts and stories.

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1576Wed, 22 Feb 2017 22:11:41 -070020:39falsefullI found Marvin sitting at a booth representing the Pacific Coast Trail – also known as the PCT. This trail starts at the Mexican border and climbs straight up the US to the Canadian border. Endurance. Perseverance. Perspective. Marvin has hiked over 1000 miles of this trail, along with many other long trails, he's also a super fan, but interestingly he also lives in a storage unit to cut down on expenses so he can travel and create the story he loves. Marvin is living on his own terms.Lori LeeEpisode 022 Brave and Afraid- Interview with Becky Andrews, Mental Health CounselorInterview with Becky Andrews – Brave and Afraid – Choosing Empowerment over Fear

                   Today we have the privilege of speaking to Becky Andrews. You may have seen her on our Instagram campaign, or you may know her from her super-human feats of tandem biking thousands of miles around the Western US, running the Boston marathon and the NY City marathon, or you may know her as a licensed clinical mental health counselor…and while she is a mom, a wife, a business owner, a life coach, and has all the education to back that up, Becky is also blind.

                   Her story is particularly powerful, because in order to accomplish all I’ve mentioned, and much more actually, she’s had to overcome fear. She’s had to take a look at her story and reframe in spaces, just as we are always talking about.

                   If you want to get a hold of Becky after listening to her interview or to purchase her book:

                   Resilencesolutionsinc.com

                   Beckylpc@gmail.com

                   (801) 259-3883

                   Book: Look Up, Move Forward

                   ]]>Interview with Becky Andrews – Brave and Afraid – Choosing Empowerment over Fear

                   Today we have the privilege of speaking to Becky Andrews. You may have seen her on our Instagram campaign, or you may know her from her super-human feats of tandem biking thousands of miles around the Western US, running the Boston marathon and the NY City marathon, or you may know her as a licensed clinical mental health counselor…and while she is a mom, a wife, a business owner, a life coach, and has all the education to back that up, Becky is also blind.

                   Her story is particularly powerful, because in order to accomplish all I’ve mentioned, and much more actually, she’s had to overcome fear. She’s had to take a look at her story and reframe in spaces, just as we are always talking about.

                   If you want to get a hold of Becky after listening to her interview or to purchase her book:

                   Resilencesolutionsinc.com

                   Beckylpc@gmail.com

                   (801) 259-3883

                   Book: Look Up, Move Forward

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1558Wed, 15 Feb 2017 09:00:45 -070024:57falsefullThough Becky Andrews is blind she hasn't let that stop her from the super-human feats of tandem biking thousands of miles around the Western US, running the Boston marathon and the NY City marathon, or from becoming a licensed clinical mental health counselor, a mom, a wife, a business owner, and a life coach. But to do all of this she's had to overcome fear and reframe difficult interpretations of a life without sight.Lori LeeEpisode 021 Get Out of Your Box – Interview with Rusty Lindquist, Author/Speaker Bamboo HRRusty tells a story of how his father tried to sacrifice him, as a child, like Abraham was called to sacrifice his son Isaac. After his mother escapes with her two children Rusty’s life gets even more interesting and tragic, and he intuits, at a young age, that his story and his ability to rise above it will create his purpose.

                   Rusty is the Vice President of HCM Strategy and Thought Leadership at Bamboo HR where he focuses on helping organizations discover and increase employee value. He is a public speaker who is focused on human performance engineering and he is passionate about helping people reframe and rise above the self-imposed limitations of their past and the stories that come along with it.

                   If you would like to get a hold of Rusty after listening to his interview:

                   rustylindquist@gmail.com

                   His book, Escape Velocity, is scheduled to be available December of 2017

                   ]]>Rusty tells a story of how his father tried to sacrifice him, as a child, like Abraham was called to sacrifice his son Isaac. After his mother escapes with her two children Rusty’s life gets even more interesting and tragic, and he intuits, at a young age, that his story and his ability to rise above it will create his purpose.

                   Rusty is the Vice President of HCM Strategy and Thought Leadership at Bamboo HR where he focuses on helping organizations discover and increase employee value. He is a public speaker who is focused on human performance engineering and he is passionate about helping people reframe and rise above the self-imposed limitations of their past and the stories that come along with it.

                   If you would like to get a hold of Rusty after listening to his interview:

                   rustylindquist@gmail.com

                   His book, Escape Velocity, is scheduled to be available December of 2017

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1556Wed, 08 Feb 2017 09:00:52 -070030:01falsefullRusty tells a story of how his father tried to sacrifice him, as a child, like Abraham was called to sacrifice his son Isaac. After his mother escapes with her two children Rusty's life gets even more interesting and tragic, and he intuits, at a young age, that his story and his ability to rise above it will create his purpose. Tune in to listen to Rusty's story and how his determination not to let his story hold him back has created not only a life he is proud of, but a life dedicated to helping others avoid the box of self-limitation.Lori LeeEpisode 020 Lean into Possibility: Making the Impossible PossibleLean into Possibility

                   Rumi said, “You were born with wings.”

                   To fly you have to jump. To jump means you have to risk. But without risk and leaning into possibility, without being off-balance at times, you are nothing but rooted to the ground, your wings unused.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Our comfort zones are very comfortable places to be. They don’t require vulnerability, because vulnerability by nature is generally uncomfortable. They don’t require risk, because real risk, the risk that pushes you past your limits is also not comfortable. Our comfort zones don’t require discomfort and so we love them – they are the happy place, but they are also the places that don’t require growth, adventure, and possibility. The only stories you are going to be telling from your comfort zone are ones you’ve already told a dozen times before.

                   Now, possibility is the flower born from the seed of risk, getting out of your comfort zone, and leaning into the unknown. Possibility is where dreams and answers lie in wait, where the unknown waits for you to pull back the veil. Possibility is the mystery that awaits you. That’s where we are going today!! What is possible for you!?

                   When we get dedicated – really serious about our lean, in fact so serious that we actually lean so far that we jump off the cliff and start using our wings, the universe creates a wind that blows up from the canyons below us and supports our faith.

                   German poet Goethe said, “Concerning all acts of initiative, there is one elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings, and material assistance which no man could have dreamed would have come his way.”

                   And, Christ said, “Be it unto you according to your faith.” In other words, when you believe enough you can fly, or in his case, walk on water. This podcast episode is really about bravery. Bravery and belief in possibility and things yet unknown. It’s about how we get to create our bigger, better life story by making sure that the stories currently raging in our minds are not holding our feet firmly to the ground while our wings ache with lost opportunity. Some of those stories look like, “Well, I have a good life. I’m fine with the way things are.”  “I can’t go after THAT dream, it’s too bold – who am I to deserve that?”  “My voice doesn’t matter, who cares about my story?”

                   For those of you who don’t follow extreme sports – sports like skiing, sky diving, surfing, motocross, etc. there is a phenomenon in human performance taking place over the past 20 years or so that is unprecedented. In the book, The Rise of Superman Steven Kotler tackles the question of how it is possible that suddenly, in the matter of one generation human feats of possibility have surpassed, often quadrupled in a matter of a very few years, what was ever considered possible for the human body to do. It is a book about the impossible and how it is happening. Using some examples from the book I’ll show you what we’re talking about. Twenty-five years ago the 360, a complete rotation on skies off a jump, was THE trick skiers were throwing. It was the cool thing in the Warren Mill ski movies. I can attest to this truth – I was there. I practiced them season after season....]]>Lean into Possibility

                   Rumi said, “You were born with wings.”

                   To fly you have to jump. To jump means you have to risk. But without risk and leaning into possibility, without being off-balance at times, you are nothing but rooted to the ground, your wings unused.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Our comfort zones are very comfortable places to be. They don’t require vulnerability, because vulnerability by nature is generally uncomfortable. They don’t require risk, because real risk, the risk that pushes you past your limits is also not comfortable. Our comfort zones don’t require discomfort and so we love them – they are the happy place, but they are also the places that don’t require growth, adventure, and possibility. The only stories you are going to be telling from your comfort zone are ones you’ve already told a dozen times before.

                   Now, possibility is the flower born from the seed of risk, getting out of your comfort zone, and leaning into the unknown. Possibility is where dreams and answers lie in wait, where the unknown waits for you to pull back the veil. Possibility is the mystery that awaits you. That’s where we are going today!! What is possible for you!?

                   When we get dedicated – really serious about our lean, in fact so serious that we actually lean so far that we jump off the cliff and start using our wings, the universe creates a wind that blows up from the canyons below us and supports our faith.

                   German poet Goethe said, “Concerning all acts of initiative, there is one elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings, and material assistance which no man could have dreamed would have come his way.”

                   And, Christ said, “Be it unto you according to your faith.” In other words, when you believe enough you can fly, or in his case, walk on water. This podcast episode is really about bravery. Bravery and belief in possibility and things yet unknown. It’s about how we get to create our bigger, better life story by making sure that the stories currently raging in our minds are not holding our feet firmly to the ground while our wings ache with lost opportunity. Some of those stories look like, “Well, I have a good life. I’m fine with the way things are.”  “I can’t go after THAT dream, it’s too bold – who am I to deserve that?”  “My voice doesn’t matter, who cares about my story?”

                   For those of you who don’t follow extreme sports – sports like skiing, sky diving, surfing, motocross, etc. there is a phenomenon in human performance taking place over the past 20 years or so that is unprecedented. In the book, The Rise of Superman Steven Kotler tackles the question of how it is possible that suddenly, in the matter of one generation human feats of possibility have surpassed, often quadrupled in a matter of a very few years, what was ever considered possible for the human body to do. It is a book about the impossible and how it is happening. Using some examples from the book I’ll show you what we’re talking about. Twenty-five years ago the 360, a complete rotation on skies off a jump, was THE trick skiers were throwing. It was the cool thing in the Warren Mill ski movies. I can attest to this truth – I was there. I practiced them season after season. They were the trick that announced you were in the top posse on the hill. Now, just two decades later, kids – like 6-year-old kids– are landing 360s and they are considered an entry trick. In 2011, only two decades later, “Bobby Brown threw the world’s first Triple Cork 1440 – which is four spins and three flips, and all off-axis.”  That is almost unfathomable forward progress in possibility just from a matter of degree comparison. World records are broken almost as fast as they are created now, which from an evolutionary standpoint is unexplainable. The rate at which physical prowess evolved in what was possible was never something that could be measured within a generation.

                   Another example Kotler uses, and he shares many, is how not long ago Evel Knievel decided to try the harrowing attempt of jumping a motorcycle over a line of buses. It was such a huge and unheard-of undertaking that people across the world tuned in to watch him risk life and limb.  “These days, on any given weekend, in arenas all over the world, you can watch dozens of riders jumping similar distances – only back-flipping as they go.”

                   Kayakers are another example. In 1997 Tao Berman blew minds when he dropped a straight drop waterfall of 83 feet in Vera Cruz, Mexico. In the following decade the record was pushed to 98 feet, then 127 feet, then kayakers entered the water at greater speeds and just over a decade later Tyler Bradt plunged 189 feet off Washington State’s Palouse Falls having more than doubled the incredible record that pushed the boundaries of what we all thought was even possible for the human body to live through. And this evolution within these extreme sports is happening at an unprecedented rate of advancement. Many more examples are shared and a much more thorough groundwork is laid in the book, but here’s the spoiler – as this extreme speed of human physical and psychological progression is being studied it has been discovered that this type of peak performance is possible because of “flow.” Flow is basically a state of meditation, mental focus, it is believing in and entering the “zone,” and it is allowing humans to redefine the impossible into possible. To do what often appears to be defying gravity and often death.

                   In Wayne Dyer’s book Wishes Fulfilled, interestingly he discusses a very similar topic in a completely different way. Dr. Dyer is famous for his spiritual leadership of teaching others the power of the mind to create the life, health, abundance…whatever they want. He says, “There’s a level of awareness available to you that you are probably unfamiliar with. It extends upward and transcends the ordinary level of consciousness that you’re most accustomed to. At his higher plane of existence, which you and every human being who has ever lived can access at will, the fulfillment of wishes is not only probably—it is guaranteed.” Dr. Dyer is talking about the power of the mind to create and remove boundaries for ourselves. He is stating, from his personal experience and many he has worked with, how we have the power within our own minds and hearts to create, through faith and action, all the wishes of our hearts – our peak performance.

                   Neville Goddard, one of the pioneering fathers of the Laws of Imaging said, “Health, wealth, beauty, and genius are not created; they are only manifested by the arrangement of your mind—that is, by your concept of yourself, and your concept of yourself is all that you accept and consent to as true.” In other words – what you believe. Who you believe yourself to be. What you believe you can do. What you believe you are worthy and capable of. It’s about belief.

                   So, what is your dream? For one minute I want you to suspend all the disbelief you’ve built up, get rid of the stories about why it’s not possible, or why you aren’t moving forward, and just imagine that nothing is in your way. What would you do? What would you want to be? What is your dream career or way of living? What would your dream relationship be like? What does real fulfillment look like to you? If money was not an option what would you be, or say, or do?

                   Say it out loud!

                   Now, what if you just went for it? What if you moved into 100% possibility? You may not know where it will lead, or where the path is even taking you, but what if you took the first step? What is the worst that could happen? What is the best that could happen? Take a moment and think about the answers.

                   This is where, like we discussed in episode seven, the heroes get in the arena and face the fears, the fear of failure, the fear of wasted time and money, the fear of looking stupid. I get all of these fears. I understand the fears, but we aren’t focusing on those. We are focusing on what’s possible when you stop looking at the fear and you start looking at the prize. There is a saying in mountain biking – look where you want to go, not where you don’t want to go. Interpreted it basically means, don’t look at the rock you don’t want to hit, and when you round a bend and there’s a drop off, don’t look down the drop off, look at the line around the rock, look at the trail that rides past the drop-off. See the path ahead, not the things that could stop you! When you start living in 100% possibility you get to start living big! And that is 100% possible, unless you tell yourself it isn’t.

                   Whether you tell yourself a thing is possible or impossible, you are right. Your mind is very powerful. Back to Christ’s saying again – “Be it unto you according to your faith.” I really believe he was giving us a key to universal law. A key to the power inside us.  I want to tell you that if you will step into action, if you will step into belief, if you will allow your inner voice and the things you intuitively know about what you are here to do, to take control and push past all the stories that stand in the way, you get to use your powers, to manifest into being, the things you want most.

                   Here’s where some story technique comes in. If you want something different than what you’ve been getting, you first must change your belief about what is possible for you. If you change what you believe, you will change what you do. So what do you believe about your potential, about your dreams, about your life?

                   There is no doubt that most of us are not the ultimate athletes that are currently challenging the concepts of possibility. We are not all spiritual powerhouses dedicated to the life of developing spiritual powers that take us beyond the realms that most ever access, but these folks show us what is possible. Show us the power of our own minds. They blaze the trail, create a model, and say, “look what you can do, if only you believe.”

                   While we are all at different levels on the path of understanding and using the powers of our own minds, and most may not be a Dr. Dyer, a Neville Goddard, or one of the extreme athletes mentioned earlier, we are people with dreams and lives to live. Those dreams matter because I believe the things we are drawn to, the things we dream of being and doing are the voices of our destiny and potential calling us. If we ignore them, we ignore our own longing to become. And what if you are the next great (fill in the blank). You probably are. But we are also people who fight diseases, who struggle to feel acceptable, who fight against shame, who get to work and put food on the table, who take care of aging parents and young toddlers. We are people who have brilliant lives to create and tragic trials to overcome, and understanding the power of our own minds, and using it, like a muscle, over and over until we are stronger and more capable, is our evolutionary and even spiritual heritage. But first we need to know we have this power, and then we need to believe in it.

                   Last night I sat across from a woman who has spent the last year battling cancer. This is not an uncommon story. Anymore it is more uncommon not to know someone taking up this battle. But I share her story because it’s one of those that doesn’t make sense to the doctors. A year ago she was diagnosed with a ten percent chance of living. She refused to die. Prayers went up for her across the country as her tribe banded together. There was a battle afoot and it was fierce. She submitted to the severe treatments, mutilating surgeries, and in her mind she simply refused to die. Her doctor told her that he would do all he could, but that her attitude would make a tremendous difference. Last night she sat across from me, in remission, doctors in the top cancer centers now studying her case, and while she attributes God answering the many prayers sent in her behalf, she also is very clear that her mindset- the way she never let the disease be a part of her in her mind, the ferocity with which she fought…these are also part of her outcome.

                   Now, let’s be clear. No one is saying that breaking the barriers of what “seems” possible is a cake walk. Kotler, in The Rise of Superman, shares the story of Danny Way, the first skateboarder to jump the Great Wall of China. I don’t have time to lay out the whole scene, but the MegaRamp was steeper and crazier than anything someone would consider skating down. When he did the trial run shoddy ramp construction sent him into the mountain. His ankle was shattered. He was rushed to the hospital with the ankle fracture and his torn ACL, but he left before they could diagnose him because he didn’t want to know the extent of the injuries. Barely able to walk, the next day he climbs ten flight of stairs to get to the top of the ramp. More than 125 million Chinese people are watching him, but this is not just a skater shooting down something like a ski ramp on a skateboard, planning to launch further than anyone on a skateboard has ever done, but it’s a feat that will require absolute precision of his ankle and knee. If they give, by even a fraction of an inch, he’s going to fly off the side and die. Kotler points out that most people can’t even stand on a broken ankle, but when all was said and done Danny not only stood on it, without give, but also withstood four Gs of pressure going into that quarter-pipe on the landing. One G is the force of gravity. Formula one drivers pull two Gs when cornering. Astronauts on take-off suffer three Gs. Most people black out at 5 Gs. What Danny Way did was so extraordinary it defies explanation. Danny Way is very clear when he says, “You want to know how I did something like jump the Great Wall on a fractured ankle,” he says. “I can’t really answer that. All I can tell you is what I already told you: When I’m pushing the edge, skating beyond my abilities, it’s always a mediation in the zone.”

                   To stay comfortable is to stay the same – your thinking stays the same, your actions stay the same. Living your best life and creating possibility means facing some fear and discomfort… jumping out of the comfort zone. If what you have to do makes you uncomfortable, you’re on the right path. Eleanor Roosevelt said, “Do one thing every day that scares you.” She didn’t say that because she thought it would be funny to have a country full of scared people, she said it because she knew that fear holds us back from so much living. Because she knew that the great men and women of the earth are facing fear everyday – it’s how they make the big things happen. When I started making this podcast I was afraid of looking stupid. I was afraid of wasting my time. I was afraid of failure. But if I hadn’t pushed past everyone of those fears, over and over, I’d still be a woman, at home, comfortable with all my extra time watching TV, living with a buried idea that felt too big, and having no idea what I was missing. Every podcast I write I’m putting my work out on the table. I’m telling stories that are often very personal and vulnerable to me. But without the vulnerable stories you wouldn’t really connect with the content. So, I keep it real, and vulnerable, and I keep leaning into possibility.

                   We had a training meeting in my office the other day, and the speaker shared a great insight I hadn’t heard before. He said when there is something that you don’t yet know how to do, or you aren’t good at, add the word “yet” to the end of the sentence because that one word opens the door to possibility.

                   So it looks like this: I don’t know how to set up an email campaign “yet.”  Or, I don’t know how to ride a bucking bronco “yet.” Or, I can’t juggle jello cubes “yet.” You see how it opens the future to a time when you will, if you want to. I love it! Next time you find yourself making statements about what you can’t do, add that “yet.”

                   More and more we are coming, as a people, to understand that there is a great deal we don’t understand about the human mind. That we are powerful beyond what we understand. But we have tremendous models showing us that we have power to create, to overcome, to be, and that these dreams, milestones, achievements, possibilities for business ventures, for relationships, for personal performance, for creation of all types begins in the mind, begins with the stories we believe about ourselves, our power, our possibility, our worthiness. This is the key, now insert it in the lock and release the stories that limit your life. Then get ready to work and blow the world away with your power to make the difference you want to make in the time you are here. Go big because you can. Because you have the power to dream, declare and deliver, if only you believe.

                   Have fun out there creating great life stories and telling the ones that make you strong! Your challenge for the week is to take a minute and journal about the questions I proffered earlier in the podcast: If you went for it, if you took action and started living and moving toward your big dream, what is the worst that could happen? What is the best that could happen? Take a moment and think about or journal about those questions. Remember, whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you are right.

                   Go to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and sign up for our weekly inspiration email, and pass this podcast onto one friend. Thanks and I’ll see you next week on the next episode of Love Your Story podcast.

                    

                    

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1552Wed, 01 Feb 2017 09:00:31 -070021:18falsefullTo fly you have to jump. To jump means you have to risk. But without risk and leaning into possibility, without being off-balance at times, you are nothing but rooted to the ground, your wings unused.Lori LeeEpisode 019 Vulnerability – The Key to Connection and PossibilityVulnerability – the key to connection and possibility

                   Brene Brown said, “I believe that vulnerability – the willingness to show up and be seen with no guarantee of outcome, is the only path to more love, belonging and joy.” Today let’s explore how vulnerability creates possibility.

                   Today let’s explore how vulnerability creates possibility.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   As adults, we accumulate experiences. Experiences that at best dull our passions and create a guarded participation in our feelings, and at worst shroud our hearts in layers and layers of armor to keep out any more of the hurt life dishes up in all its varieties.  “I want to feel passion again,” is a common refrain. Or “I can’t remember the last time I laughed really hard.” There are also all the hidden dreams we don’t dare embark on, and the relationships that die because we aren’t open enough to risk our feelings and our authentic selves. In stories, these are often the issues the protagonist is working through. We celebrate when someone overcomes an obstacle and lives their dream, when the hero finds hope and joy again when the protagonist transforms a relationship from weak and dying into something fresh and passionate. Think about the stories we watch in the theater and read in books. We are always rooting for the characters to be honest and open, to share and connect.

                   What does that mean?  For me, the big emotional work of my later life has been around finding the desire and the courage to strip off the layers of armor I have so carefully placed around myself over the course of my life. I have on a breastplate, a helmet, a nice piece of heavy mail underneath the outer layers. I have a shield…I have it all. I only know this because of how hard it was to get it off. Stories carved from our pain, these are the tales we often hold close to the chest. In our careful protection of our lives, we suffocate a past and a future, hold hostage the creator – ourselves.

                   The dictionary defines vulnerability as:

                   1. Capable of or susceptible to being wounded or hurt, as by a weapon: a vulnerable part of the body.
                   2. Open to moral attack, criticism, temptation, etc.:
                   3. An argument vulnerable to refutation; He is vulnerable to bribery.

                   
                   

                    

                   Now none of those definitions make me want to jump into vulnerability, but I learned a thing or two this year. Namely, that vulnerability is power. That seems like an oxymoron, but it turns out that it’s true. When we are real, authentically who we are, this is the space where true connection is made – or that the possibility of it even exists. One of the things that I have learned in my writing is that when I share real stories, not crafting them so they sound good, but the raw, real stuff; the stuff that makes me vulnerable, this is the space where people are touched. This is the space where readers can relate. This is the space where writing is not life as it should be, but rather, life as it is. And this makes connection. Writers help society understand the connections that bind us, and this is done, often, through realness, which requires vulnerability.

                   In my Next Level workshop there were many people who were striving to find their own vulnerability. Men wanted better relationships with their wives and they weren’t sure why they were hitting a wall. Vulnerability was completely foreign to them. That space where you share yourself, your feelings, your fears.  Fathers and mothers wanted to reconnect with...]]>Vulnerability – the key to connection and possibility

                   Brene Brown said, “I believe that vulnerability – the willingness to show up and be seen with no guarantee of outcome, is the only path to more love, belonging and joy.” Today let’s explore how vulnerability creates possibility.

                   Today let’s explore how vulnerability creates possibility.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   As adults, we accumulate experiences. Experiences that at best dull our passions and create a guarded participation in our feelings, and at worst shroud our hearts in layers and layers of armor to keep out any more of the hurt life dishes up in all its varieties.  “I want to feel passion again,” is a common refrain. Or “I can’t remember the last time I laughed really hard.” There are also all the hidden dreams we don’t dare embark on, and the relationships that die because we aren’t open enough to risk our feelings and our authentic selves. In stories, these are often the issues the protagonist is working through. We celebrate when someone overcomes an obstacle and lives their dream, when the hero finds hope and joy again when the protagonist transforms a relationship from weak and dying into something fresh and passionate. Think about the stories we watch in the theater and read in books. We are always rooting for the characters to be honest and open, to share and connect.

                   What does that mean?  For me, the big emotional work of my later life has been around finding the desire and the courage to strip off the layers of armor I have so carefully placed around myself over the course of my life. I have on a breastplate, a helmet, a nice piece of heavy mail underneath the outer layers. I have a shield…I have it all. I only know this because of how hard it was to get it off. Stories carved from our pain, these are the tales we often hold close to the chest. In our careful protection of our lives, we suffocate a past and a future, hold hostage the creator – ourselves.

                   The dictionary defines vulnerability as:

                   1. Capable of or susceptible to being wounded or hurt, as by a weapon: a vulnerable part of the body.
                   2. Open to moral attack, criticism, temptation, etc.:
                   3. An argument vulnerable to refutation; He is vulnerable to bribery.

                   
                   

                    

                   Now none of those definitions make me want to jump into vulnerability, but I learned a thing or two this year. Namely, that vulnerability is power. That seems like an oxymoron, but it turns out that it’s true. When we are real, authentically who we are, this is the space where true connection is made – or that the possibility of it even exists. One of the things that I have learned in my writing is that when I share real stories, not crafting them so they sound good, but the raw, real stuff; the stuff that makes me vulnerable, this is the space where people are touched. This is the space where readers can relate. This is the space where writing is not life as it should be, but rather, life as it is. And this makes connection. Writers help society understand the connections that bind us, and this is done, often, through realness, which requires vulnerability.

                   In my Next Level workshop there were many people who were striving to find their own vulnerability. Men wanted better relationships with their wives and they weren’t sure why they were hitting a wall. Vulnerability was completely foreign to them. That space where you share yourself, your feelings, your fears.  Fathers and mothers wanted to reconnect with children, children wanted to reconnect with parents. They wanted to heal relationships. They needed a key and the key was vulnerability. Stripping off the armor that we have so carefully placed over our hearts and heads is no small feat. In fact, it’s not something you just do. It’s a practice. It’s a way of being. It’s facing the fear every day when your next encounter could be made better by showing up open, by sharing feelings, by being your real self. It’s only when we are brave enough to risk, to be open, that possibility is created, that real connection can take place. And so, we practiced.

                   I received a note from my friend Rick. This is what it said:

                   Lori,

                   You are one of the most persistent people I have ever met. Your determination is inspiring. When you open your heart you are also one of the most gentle people I have ever met. The world knows how strong you are, but vulnerability is the key to your power and everything you want in life.  Love Rick

                   The first word I want to point out there is “when.” “When” you open your heart. This indicates that I have a hard time of it. That I protect my heart. The second thing I wish to point out is the line, “the world knows how strong you are, but vulnerability is the key to your power.” I read this to say that while my individual strength is already established, it’s not my power. The thing we often think of as power – a synonym  – “strength” is not really where our power lies. Then he reveals where the power lies – in the vulnerability. The minute we have one of those conversations where we are open and explain what we really feel and where we are coming from, when we drop the façade of having it all together, then people can see themselves in us. This vulnerable space allows connection and authenticity. It allows for empathy and understanding when needed. It creates space for relating. Armor keeps you safely untouched, disconnected, and ironically out of touch with your power.

                   Brene Brown, author, researcher and academic specializing in vulnerability and shame said, “Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it. Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and belonging and joy—the experiences that make us the most vulnerable. Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light.”
                   I took a survey to get some ideas of where people had braved vulnerability in their lives. Let me share some of the responses I got.

                   One woman said, “I think there are many types of vulnerabilities, and all pretty unique to the person. For me, one type is knowingly placing myself in a position where I can be rejected. Sharing my story in a writing class was a big one for me. It was not only sharing my writing, but also sharing a very emotional response to my relationship with my dad. I almost didn’t do it.”

                   When I asked her if it was worth it, in hindsight, she said, “ It was absolutely worth it. I didn’t share the whole thing with the class, but I ended up writing about when I was molested by a neighbor boy. It was the first time I’d ever written or talked about it. It was an extremely emotional experience finally writing it down, but it’s changed my life for the better. It’s also made me more open and vocal about sexual assault…which is what I’m hoping to write my dissertation on.”

                   I want to point out a couple things I notice about her answer. The first is that it took great bravery to first, face an event in her life that was traumatizing. Just writing about it was vulnerable. Then, she shared it,  she said it out loud and removed the curtains and shame so they could no longer keep her in the dark. Now, this alone is beautiful and brave, but it created possibility. The possibility I see that her vulnerability and bravery created was the discovery of her dissertation topic. For those who have sought advanced degrees you know that often finding that area of research, narrowing it, it a painful and involved process. Her bravery and vulnerability paved a way for her to find that topic. If she had not been able to face that part of her story she would still be hiding from it, and certainly would not be sounding a voice and creating research to stand up for things important to her. This vulnerable space is where possibility was created.

                   Another woman shared, “As an actor every time you get on stage your vulnerable. Whenever you put yourself in any spotlight you’re opening yourself up for others critiques about you. If you aren’t really honest on stage the audience can tell. Dance is that way too. In my choreography class, we had to choreograph a piece for our final concert. It was such a beautiful concert because people really dug deep and put themselves out there, myself included. It was terrifying because a piece of me was on that stage being graded by other people.”

                   I’ll give you another example, she said. I became terrified to gain weight and would only eat a pop tart or a granola bar a day. When I realized that I was headed down a slippery slope I told my roommates and close friends what I was struggling with. I was scared because I was worried they would judge me or not take me seriously. They were amazing though and really helped me through it. I think vulnerability is not only sharing your true self with others but also letting others share with you.

                   I asked her – so is it your experience that when you come from a vulnerable place, that you can connect more authentically with others? Her response, “For sure. When you’re not willing to be open and vulnerable then it’s a lot harder to connect because there’s some sort of block there.

                   Another woman, a sports writer, shared a vulnerable piece she wrote about the domestic violence cases in the NFL and how the public needs to be more open about the conversations about domestic violence. In order to do this, she divulged in this article her own experience with domestic violence. Do you think that was vulnerable? When you submit a piece like that there is a weight in the pit of your stomach as you hit the send button. It’s fear letting you know that this vulnerability stuff is scary, and it’s pure courage when your finger pushes the send button anyway.

                   There are numerous ways to be vulnerable. Another woman, a martial artist brought up the physical vulnerability of training with men. She said, “As a woman who does martial arts with men vulnerable happens almost every time I train. When I train with men I don’t know, I am putting myself out there. They could be full of themselves and want to dominate, or they could be brand new and go all wild and out of control on you. However, off the mats, I feel just opposite. I am empowered, strong and confident and know that I can handle myself if needs be. And that is so invigorating!

                   Despite that feeling of vulnerability on the mats, she creates the possibility for her empowerment off the mat by accepting and working through that vulnerable state during training. If she let her fear keep her from the mat she would be neither accomplished nor empowered. Courage – every time I see these examples of vulnerability I see courage! Courage to write, courage to speak up, courage to train, courage to dance, courage to share secrets that feel shameful. Courage to risk. And it is that courage that creates the possibility for richer experiences.

                   For my vulnerability work, every day I remind myself that I am open. I walk around with my body posture open. I don’t dismiss people, I engage with them. I stop using my armor to hold people out and instead I remind myself that I am surrounded by great people and I want to get to know them. But, I will not lie to you, I have to remind myself to do it. Sometimes I just repeat to myself “I am open.”

                   Sometimes vulnerability looks like moving forward into things that might cause you pain or loss, but doing it with your heart open. Another woman who shared her vulnerability said, “Tomorrow marks 7 weeks since the doctor told us Tracy’s liver would fail in 6-12 weeks without treatment. In that short time, I’ve gotten even more comfortable in the uncomfortable. More importantly, I’ve learned to walk in the “and” rather than in the “or”– meaning that despite the outcome (the or), we still get to plan for and live our vision for however long we can AND I get to be okay with creating and living MY vision no matter the outcome. It’s like living with each foot in a different world but walking ahead anyway in the same direction.”

                   While the tale of how we suffer, and how we are delighted; how we love, and how we lose; how we grow and how we fail is never a new one, it’s a story full of other people. These people, by themselves, lead lives full of the same things, on their own terms, so the space for connection comes when we chose to acknowledge the realness of the journey, to be vulnerable and trust that being open holds more joy and possibility than closing down.

                   Brene Brown says that vulnerability is THE work of living a whole-hearted life. And, she couldn’t have been more right in my case when she said, “hiding out, pretending and armoring up against vulnerability are killing us: killing our spirits, our hopes, our potential, our creativity, our ability to lead, our love, our faith and our joy.”

                   I feel better when I’m open. I meet people I wouldn’t have met. I create exchange and possibility.

                   As I watch others work on their vulnerability, sharing feelings and addressing issues that have been avoided, trying things they have put off for fear of looking foolish, daring to step up and try for their dreams while fighting off the tidal wave of fears that always accompanies a step like that: fear of failure, fear of looking foolish, fear of loss, fear of _________ fill in the blank. I noticed again, how universal fear is. It’s the dragon on every shoulder, and yet when I look at these people I so clearly see their potential, and I can clearly see that they need not fear. They are bright, powerful and beautiful and if they can contain their fears, shut them down, or simply replace them with another voice, then their vulnerability opens up possibility. Possibility for everything.

                   Fear is a monster, fear is a voice, fear is a dragon, a mega phone, a canker. Fear is a hole, an empty stomach, and old rose bush that won’t grow roses. Fear is a tongue that lashes out, a strangle hold, a knotted rope. Fear is a stop sign, a darkness we can’t see through. Fear is an animal with bared teeth. Fear is not love, or hope or possibility. Fear is a wrench when you need a flashlight, a hook when you need a spoon. Fear is why we armor up. Fear is why we do not make ourselves vulnerable.

                   Vulnerability is the key to connection, to your greatest power; and fear is what keeps you from it.  Exploring and testing your own vulnerability, your own real heart, this is the path Brene was talking about – the one to more love, belonging, and joy.  The more of your authentic self that you offer to something – a hobby, a person, a dream, a workshop, a challenge, a race, your job, your children…the more you are going to get back. When you allow the space of vulnerability to create possibility, …

                   As you create your story, look at your life. How often are you in your comfort zone? If you’re in your comfort zone you probably aren’t stepping into vulnerable places, you aren’t creating possibility the way you could. What about your relationships. Could they be better? Could opening up some of those vulnerable sharing spaces help you bridge spaces between you and your loved ones? This week your challenge is to find a space in which to be brave and vulnerable. See what possibility it creates when you tell someone how you really feel; when you open up and share a talent; when you bravely step forward despite possible pain and loss; when you ask for help.

                   Have fun out there telling your stories this week, and creating bigger and better possibilities because you are open to vulnerability. Embrace your vulnerability by sharing your story on our Facebook page or www.loveyourstorypodcast. See you next week – every Wednesday a new episode comes out – on Love Your Story podcast.

                    

                    

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1523Wed, 25 Jan 2017 09:00:03 -070018:53falsefullWhile the tale of how we suffer, and how we are delighted; how we love, and how we lose; how we grow and how we fail is never a new one, it’s a story full of other people. These people, by themselves, lead lives full of the same things, on their own terms, so the space for connection comes when we chose to acknowledge the realness of the journey, to be vulnerable and trust that being open holds more joy and possibility than closing down.Lori LeeEpisode 018 Gratitude, the seed from which abundance bloomsGratitude, Abundance and Prosperity – The seed and the plant

                   We all want abundance. We all want prosperity. The key to open the door is as simple as gratitude—it shows you what you already have, how prosperous you already are, how supported you are by God and the universe where it really counts. And once you truly feel that in your soul, you open for even more to flow into your space of being. The stories we tell about our abundance now set the stage for what will come. Welcome to episode 18 – where we are going to talk about the seed of gratitude and the plant that grows in to abundance and prosperity.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   We’ve just been through the holiday season. Thanksgiving is a time when we focus, for a moment on what we’re grateful for, while Christmas, quickly on its heels is a time when we shift gears and start thinking about what we want – what gift we will ask for. With January we start planning for what we want to create that we don’t yet have – a flatter stomach, a promotion, more patience, something different than what you have now. I’m all for progression and forward movement, but I’ll let you in on a secret, before we get more, we need to appreciate what we have in the now! And that’s what today’s podcast is about, how gratitude leads to abundance. How being present in the now, and grateful for what is around you at this very moment, is the key to opening more peace of mind, more abundance, and greater prosperity. Let’s get started, because there are really good reasons why life will get a lot better if you make gratitude a constant way of being. Namely: It makes for the very happiest stories.

                   You’ve heard the saying “You have to know the bad to know the good?” The idea of contrast as a teacher is nothing new, particularly when it comes to gratitude. The moments when the sound track on our lives intensifies because the trauma and drama is about to get amplified is not when we are thinking “Oh yay! I’m about to learn something wonderful.” But, with pain comes the other side of the coin, which is the appreciation for when pain is not present. Let me tell you a story.

                   When I met death and he stood close enough that his breath was hot on my face, I was left somehow different.  With his retreat he took me, with his bony fingers, past the point of the invincibility of youth.  I arrived at a place of realization, a state of understanding limits in a way that had previously escaped me.  As I lay, unable to move from the pain of broken ribs and punctured lung, fractured skull, deep puncture wounds in my arm, knee, scalp, a broken ankle and fingers, suddenly I was excruciatingly aware of the blessing of a whole body.

                   I used to rock climb multiple times a week finding a deep fulfillment in disciplining my mind and body to take me one step further than I’d gone before; to feel the rock, sometimes cold, sometimes hot, the finger pockets, the ledges, my aching legs and forearms, the chalk on my fingers and the sweat soaking through it – the adrenalin, the now.  You trust your belay partner or you wouldn’t climb with them, so I never imagined I’d lie at the bottom of a cliff victim of human error, ambulance racing to my broken body.  These are not the things we plan for.

                   I had weeks to lay and wait for the world and time to pass me by as my body tried to piece itself back together after the 100-foot fall.  This provided thinking time and a profound understanding of a few things I took for granted.

                   Not being able to lie down or breathe well from the...]]>Gratitude, Abundance and Prosperity – The seed and the plant

                   We all want abundance. We all want prosperity. The key to open the door is as simple as gratitude—it shows you what you already have, how prosperous you already are, how supported you are by God and the universe where it really counts. And once you truly feel that in your soul, you open for even more to flow into your space of being. The stories we tell about our abundance now set the stage for what will come. Welcome to episode 18 – where we are going to talk about the seed of gratitude and the plant that grows in to abundance and prosperity.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   We’ve just been through the holiday season. Thanksgiving is a time when we focus, for a moment on what we’re grateful for, while Christmas, quickly on its heels is a time when we shift gears and start thinking about what we want – what gift we will ask for. With January we start planning for what we want to create that we don’t yet have – a flatter stomach, a promotion, more patience, something different than what you have now. I’m all for progression and forward movement, but I’ll let you in on a secret, before we get more, we need to appreciate what we have in the now! And that’s what today’s podcast is about, how gratitude leads to abundance. How being present in the now, and grateful for what is around you at this very moment, is the key to opening more peace of mind, more abundance, and greater prosperity. Let’s get started, because there are really good reasons why life will get a lot better if you make gratitude a constant way of being. Namely: It makes for the very happiest stories.

                   You’ve heard the saying “You have to know the bad to know the good?” The idea of contrast as a teacher is nothing new, particularly when it comes to gratitude. The moments when the sound track on our lives intensifies because the trauma and drama is about to get amplified is not when we are thinking “Oh yay! I’m about to learn something wonderful.” But, with pain comes the other side of the coin, which is the appreciation for when pain is not present. Let me tell you a story.

                   When I met death and he stood close enough that his breath was hot on my face, I was left somehow different.  With his retreat he took me, with his bony fingers, past the point of the invincibility of youth.  I arrived at a place of realization, a state of understanding limits in a way that had previously escaped me.  As I lay, unable to move from the pain of broken ribs and punctured lung, fractured skull, deep puncture wounds in my arm, knee, scalp, a broken ankle and fingers, suddenly I was excruciatingly aware of the blessing of a whole body.

                   I used to rock climb multiple times a week finding a deep fulfillment in disciplining my mind and body to take me one step further than I’d gone before; to feel the rock, sometimes cold, sometimes hot, the finger pockets, the ledges, my aching legs and forearms, the chalk on my fingers and the sweat soaking through it – the adrenalin, the now.  You trust your belay partner or you wouldn’t climb with them, so I never imagined I’d lie at the bottom of a cliff victim of human error, ambulance racing to my broken body.  These are not the things we plan for.

                   I had weeks to lay and wait for the world and time to pass me by as my body tried to piece itself back together after the 100-foot fall.  This provided thinking time and a profound understanding of a few things I took for granted.

                   Not being able to lie down or breathe well from the injuries, my head swimming with vertigo when I tilted it back on a pillow, not being able to hold by son because of broken fingers and a broken hand; not being able to stand or walk well due to a broken ankle stripped of ligaments, made so much sweeter the chance to dance, when I finally could, to shower myself, to drive, to walk, to get up off the couch without help. This trauma taught me how much I love my body – how grateful I am for it.  I learned that when whole and healthy it functions smooth and beautiful and that I love to breathe.

                   While contrast, knowing the bad so we can fully appreciate the good, is one way to become grateful, I’m going to suggest that gratitude can become a habitual way of thinking and need not only come when compelled through comparison.

                   At its core, abundant living and gratitude is a way of seeing the world. It’s picking the good things out of our stories instead of the bad. I have learned that when we do this, we see and we create more good things! It’s a little like magic.

                   My story of my climbing accident could focus on the trauma, I could relive and relish telling about the pain and long recovery. I could focus on the belayer who dropped me from the top of the climb and the betrayal and incompetence shown. I could get lost in blame. I could focus on the scars, or I can focus on what I learned. My body has always been a loyal, healthy, beautiful, smoothly functioning friend. It has and continues to serve me well and takes me to physicals heights of exhaustion, ecstasy, and everything in between. I get to focus my story on how I really learned to appreciate the gift of a healthy, functioning body.

                   I challenge you to find those abundant gifts you take for granted every day and celebrate them!

                   Let’s talk about the first and most obvious reason why gratitude as a way of living rocks! First and foremost when you start off the day being grateful that you have hot water to shower in, food for breakfast and heat warming your house during the cold winter months, you begin the day with a mindset that allows you to feel supported, happy, fortunate. This mindset is a powerful one to step out on.  Always start with gratitude because it makes you happy, and what better reason could there be?

                   Real, heart-felt, deep-soul gratitude for the people, conveniences, opportunities, comforts and possibilities in your life is the key to joyful living. Bringing this into your life every day is well-worth the effort. How? In an early episode I shared how I say and gratitude prayer every morning. This gives me a moment that draws my attention to the hot water in my shower, to the health and strength of myself and my children, of the joy in my puppies gait as he hops down the street on his walk. That’s one way. Some people keep a gratitude journal, writing each day a list of things they are grateful for that day. I have found when I’ve done this that going back and reading the entries from the past is the most powerful part. Things I had already forgotten about are there, written on the page for me to relive again. I’m sure there are lots of ways you can bring yourself to a more habitual state of gratitude, find one that works for you BECAUSE…

                   when you buy now you will also get the extra bonus of ABUNDANCE. Living in abundance is most everyone’s goal to some degree or another. Most people don’t enjoy living in a state of lack. But many people spend a lot of time thinking about lack, and so more lack shows up in their lives. When we focus on what we don’t have, what we don’t have stays as a permanent state. After all, it is what we are focused on. Abundance, on the other hand, is also a mindset! It’s a way of thinking. It’s a magic way of thinking that helps you realize the abundance you currently live in and attract even more of that abundance into your world. Abundance thinking isn’t just about money. It’s about what we’ve been talking about – it’s about gratitude and rolling around in the beautiful abundance that is already available in your life. This looks a little different for everyone because everyone’s circumstances are different.

                   If you have someone to love, your health, your freedom, and the opportunity of just being alive, you are rich. If you have comforts like all the food you want, friends, indoor plumbing and the occasional night on the town, you have more than many people on this planet. You won the lottery. Of all the people who have every lived on the earth, and of all the people currently alive, to be one that has enough food, the opportunity for education, freedom, clothing, and a roof over your head puts you in the top percentage of abundance, and many of us have even more than that to be grateful for.

                   Chris Lee, trainer, transformational coach, and author, says in his book Transform Your Life, 10 Principles of Abundance and Prosperity, that when you join your wisdom, talents, and experience with others that you are creating abundance within your relationships and co-creating a network, a community you can draw from and contribute to, and that this is another type of abundance. Do you have a support network, friends, associates? Don’t forget to count that blessing.

                   There was a time when my kids’ father and I took a trip in a travel trailer for six months through Mexico and the Western United States to see places and make adventures. In a travel trailer you have limited water, electricity only when you plug in, and you have to empty your own black water – no easy flush of the toilet never to see your dinner bi-products again, no you have to empty your own toilet tank, hose out the tubes, and generally get a whole lot closer to the sewer than one is generally used to. When I brushed my teeth I had to get my toothbrush wet quickly then turn off the water because of the limited water. Before this adventure, I often bemoaned paying the utility bills. I was newly married and utilities like power, water, sewer just felt like unalienable rights a person should be given without having to pay for them. Ahhh youth. At any rate, when we returned from six months of life with intermittent utility privileges I was more than happy to pay those utility bills. Those utility bills meant that I had a telephone, and a warm house, and running water and a toilet that took black water far from my thoughts with the flick of a wrist. If you have a place to live and utilities, you are blessed.

                   I encourage you, even on the hard days-maybe especially on the hard days, to remember that you are abundant now! We have life, we have breath, we have our own set of abilities. These things are the foundation for creation and we get to pick the ball up from there. We would never trade these things for money, any of them. Everyone can begin to live in a state of abundance through gratitude – right now, no matter how much money you have or don’t have. There’s no waiting until you’re super rich, or until you have the new car or the latest and greatest (fill in then blank). That’s missing the point entirely. Abundance is a state of mind, not a stack of things you own. Let me repeat that: Abundance is a state of mind, not a stack of things you own.

                   Chris Lee is clear that abundance is a state of consciousness. He says that “true abundance has everything to do with how you see the world,” and that “when you live from a place of gratitude and appreciation, you can shift your consciousness quickly from a place of scarcity to a place of abundance.”  He goes on to acknowledge that it sounds too simple, but, he says, “I’m here to tell you that I know it works. You cannot have what you want until you are grateful for what you have…the state of abundance IS gratitude.”

                   Eckhart Tolle basically shared the same truth when he said, “Acknowledging the good that you already have in your life is the foundation for all abundance.”

                   So, on your road to abundance, the first and most critical step is gratitude.  And why not? It’s also the key to happiness.

                   The bubbling water around me was getting in my ears and the fat hairy man sitting next to me in the Jacuzzi was blocking my view of the moon from the Whistler Resort Hotel in Whistler, British Columbia.  Straining up in my outdoor seat on this April night I attempted to keep the water from spraying in my face and still keep the view of the moon sliding behind the foggy white clouds and coloring them with the eerie light of muted daffodil and a hazy, seaweed green. From the outdoor deck in which we sat cooking ourselves in the hot-tub, I finally gave up trying to see around him and sat back, but his body made the spray of the jets splay up and out from the water’s surface and I succeeded only in getting another face-full of water.  Moving to the other side I found a spot to lean out and over the side, my arms folded over the edge. Finally, I let my mind relax, being massaged by the night sky, by the moon in mystic dance with the clouds, painting them with its borrowed light.  I basked in the exposure of crystal stars while my body was massaged by the warm water.

                   This snapshot of 30-minutes in British Columbia is a super simple example of the take-away technique. In this tiny story I get to either focus on the man blocking my view and spraying me with water, focus on the irritation and discomfort, or I get to focus on the humor, the gorgeous night sky I was so privileged to sit under, and the great fortune of getting to relax in a hot tub after a day of skiing. That’s a super easy one, but I’ve known people who find the negative in every situation and amplify it by complaint until they and everyone around them is in a miserable funk. Who wants to be that guy? I know nobody likes to be around that guy.

                   Chris Lee says, “Abundance is the mindset – prosperity is the result.”

                   We live in a time and culture where everything we could possibly imagine is available if you have enough money. You want to travel across the world and see exotic things – all you need is money. You want a maid, a race car, surgery to rearrange your face into someone else? All you need is money.  We live in profusely prosperous times, but it’s only available for those who have the money, so everyone wants money, seeks abundance, craves the power and freedom allotted by the almighty dollar.

                   Here’s a quick little reminder from Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs: Maslow’s hierarchy of needs is a theory in psychology proposed by Abraham Maslow in 1943. It basically shows a triangle made of 5 tiers. Starting from the bottom, each tier lists a set of human needs that needs to be taken care of before we will focus on the next set. So, the bottom tier shows that we need food, water, warmth and rest. Once we have those things we will seek to find security and safety (the second tier), once we have security and safety we will seek out the third tier, intimate relationships, belonging and friends. The fourth tier is seeking after privilege and feelings of accomplishment, while the fifth tier is self-actualization and focus on achieving one’s full potential. I bring this up in conjunction with a study done in 2010 of 450,000 Americans, by Nobel prize-winning scientist Daniel Kahneman and colleagues at Princeton University. One of the things this study points out is that for those who suffer for food, water and shelter, an increase of money most certainly makes them happier, but past a certain point of income, when all the basic needs are taken care of, then a continual increase in money is NOT the key to happiness. More money does not equate with greater happiness. The goal to make six-figures might be something you want to shoot for, but don’t do it for happiness sake. Happiness is living in that state of recognizing the abundance that surrounds you, and while money opens many opportunities and provides security, at some point you must look at what you are sacrificing for the money. If the acquisition of your money comes at the price of your relationships, and you are past the point of having all you need and more, perhaps your best life move is to cut back on attaining more money for the sake of supposed happiness, and enjoy the prosperity and abundance you have created, and nurture the relationships you are so blessed to abundantly have.

                   Melanie Greensberg, Ph.D., a practicing psychologist, wrote in her article, Is Money the Secret to Happiness, that “Of peoples greatest regrets at the end of life, not spending more time with their kids when they were young, is one of the most common. Overall, money to meet basic needs is necessary, but not sufficient for life happiness. It is a piece of the pie in overall life satisfaction, along with relationship satisfaction, meaningful work, health and spiritual well-being.”  These are the pieces of life that we get to see abundantly and with gratitude, starting where we are in recognition of the wonderful abundance around us, and creating from that state of abundance.

                   Ralph Waldo Emerson takes it a step further, he goes beyond just being thankful for the good things.  He says, “Cultivate the habit of being grateful for every good thing that comes to you, and to give thanks continuously. And because all things have contributed to your advancement, you should include all things in your gratitude.”

                   Gratitude, abundance, and prosperity are to each other like a seed and the plant. Gratitude plants the seed of abundance in your life, and from the daily watering and care sprouts happiness and increased prosperity, because focus on the good brings more good blooming into your life. It’s that simple.

                   This week’s challenge is to go through a couple of your life stories, maybe even a couple of the tough ones, and find the parts and pieces of those stories that give you something to be thankful for. Find the gratitude. Find that state of abundance from which to stand and bask in the ways life is supporting you. Find the night sky instead of the obstacle blocking it. Find the lesson instead of the regret or blame. Find the light instead of the shadow.

                   Have fun out there telling your stories and I’ll see you next week with the next episode of Love Your Story podcast. We’d sure love it if you’d go to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and sign up for the weekly inspiration/challenge so we can stay in touch with you.

                    

                    

                    

                    

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1520Wed, 18 Jan 2017 09:00:25 -070021:32falsefullWe all want abundance. We all want prosperity. The key to open the door is as simple as gratitude—it shows you what you already have, how prosperous you already are, how supported you are by God and the universe where it really counts. And once you truly feel that in your soul, you open for even more to flow into your space of being. The stories we tell about our abundance now set the stage for what will come.Lori LeeEpisode 017 — 5 Challenges for 30 DaysEpisode #17       5 Challenges for 30 Days

                   Aristotle said, “We are what we repeatedly do.  Excellence then, is not an act, but a habit.”

                   What stories do you habitually tell yourself? What stories can you reframe to create better habits and ways of being? Today I’m going to give you 5 challenges for the next 30 days! Easy, but life altering if you let them in.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Think about something you do habitually. Something that might have been hard to learn at first, but after practice, you can do it without even thinking about it. Your brain has set up a pattern and you will do it the same way every time. We set up patterns of behavior by repeatedly doing them until the body and brain go on autopilot and can do them without much thought. Since we become what we repeatedly do, and we do what we repeatedly think about it makes a great deal of sense that we purposefully create thoughts and habits that will help us become who we want to be. Habits that create the story and life we want for ourselves and our loved ones. Habits that strengthen, build and empower us. Often these habits are very linked to the stories we have going on in our minds.

                   The challenge I am throwing out to you today is to take the five simple things I’ll share and implement them into your life for just 30 days. No year-long resolution, no, just try these for 30 days and see what new habits you might form and how those transform your life and your way of seeing and thinking about things.  So, let’s get started…first, eat chocolate cake everyday…just kidding.

                    1. Address and acknowledge the lesson in inconvenient situations – look at the stories.– There are lots of ways to look at life. We acknowledge all the time that our stories are filled with challenges – people we clash with, lost love, situations and people who require the very depths of our patience, health and body issues, disappointments, lost jobs, no job, that lump of coal you got for Christmas, the state of the world, the definning of shark. Of course there are also the moments of beauty and miracles, but this challenge is about the habit of how we deal with the disappointments and challenges. One of the ways we can approach life is with the idea that everything is a life lesson.  Everyone you meet, everything you encounter, they’re all part of the learning experience. So, here’s the challenge: Acknowledge the lesson, especially when things don’t go your way.  If you don’t get a job you wanted or a relationship doesn’t work, it only means the right thing for you– is still out there waiting, and the lesson you just learned is a step toward it. It’s easy to start making up stories about ourselves and others when things don’t happen the way we want: I’m not good enough; that person had it out for me; my boss doesn’t really like me; my friends always let me down, they must not respect me. None of these are helpful stories, even if they seem real. Remember that you get to choose your perspective of any situation: Attitude determines experience. When you try to find the lesson and glean a little something from the experience, and focus on that, there is less room for the one-liners to eat away and create a bad headspace for us. Every day we choose our state of mind. Try to find the lesson that comes with each challenge. Find the take-away – the thing you will ponder on, learn from, and focus on whenever you revisit that experience. It will change your...]]>Episode #17       5 Challenges for 30 Days

                   Aristotle said, “We are what we repeatedly do.  Excellence then, is not an act, but a habit.”

                   What stories do you habitually tell yourself? What stories can you reframe to create better habits and ways of being? Today I’m going to give you 5 challenges for the next 30 days! Easy, but life altering if you let them in.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Think about something you do habitually. Something that might have been hard to learn at first, but after practice, you can do it without even thinking about it. Your brain has set up a pattern and you will do it the same way every time. We set up patterns of behavior by repeatedly doing them until the body and brain go on autopilot and can do them without much thought. Since we become what we repeatedly do, and we do what we repeatedly think about it makes a great deal of sense that we purposefully create thoughts and habits that will help us become who we want to be. Habits that create the story and life we want for ourselves and our loved ones. Habits that strengthen, build and empower us. Often these habits are very linked to the stories we have going on in our minds.

                   The challenge I am throwing out to you today is to take the five simple things I’ll share and implement them into your life for just 30 days. No year-long resolution, no, just try these for 30 days and see what new habits you might form and how those transform your life and your way of seeing and thinking about things.  So, let’s get started…first, eat chocolate cake everyday…just kidding.

                    1. Address and acknowledge the lesson in inconvenient situations – look at the stories.– There are lots of ways to look at life. We acknowledge all the time that our stories are filled with challenges – people we clash with, lost love, situations and people who require the very depths of our patience, health and body issues, disappointments, lost jobs, no job, that lump of coal you got for Christmas, the state of the world, the definning of shark. Of course there are also the moments of beauty and miracles, but this challenge is about the habit of how we deal with the disappointments and challenges. One of the ways we can approach life is with the idea that everything is a life lesson.  Everyone you meet, everything you encounter, they’re all part of the learning experience. So, here’s the challenge: Acknowledge the lesson, especially when things don’t go your way.  If you don’t get a job you wanted or a relationship doesn’t work, it only means the right thing for you– is still out there waiting, and the lesson you just learned is a step toward it. It’s easy to start making up stories about ourselves and others when things don’t happen the way we want: I’m not good enough; that person had it out for me; my boss doesn’t really like me; my friends always let me down, they must not respect me. None of these are helpful stories, even if they seem real. Remember that you get to choose your perspective of any situation: Attitude determines experience. When you try to find the lesson and glean a little something from the experience, and focus on that, there is less room for the one-liners to eat away and create a bad headspace for us. Every day we choose our state of mind. Try to find the lesson that comes with each challenge. Find the take-away – the thing you will ponder on, learn from, and focus on whenever you revisit that experience. It will change your story completely because you give up victimhood, blaming, bitterness…

                    2. Success File – what was the day’s story? At the end of the day I do what is called “success file” which is a play on sounds – “successful.” I go through and list in my head all the things I got done, instead of all the things I didn’t get done. This includes everything, even getting out of bed, taking a shower, doing my make-up. Because sometimes that’s harder than others. Some days my list is longer than others, but it always shows me that I’ve created SOME successes. Maybe my list is: I got dressed and ready for work. I made breakfast for the kids. I did morning meditation. I walked the dog. I went to zumba. I took a client out on showings. I fixed dinner. I had a great conversation with my son.  Maybe instead it looks like: I got out of bed. I enjoyed a cup of tea. I read a book I’ve been wanting to read. I talked with a friend. I ate a healthy lunch. I processed some paperwork. Maybe it looks like this: I slept in late and got some extra needed ZZZs. I washed the car. I wrote a podcast. I went to a listing presentation. And that’s it. Every day is different for each person but it’s invigorating to file your successes instead of focus on the things still sitting on your List of Things To Do. Try this every night as you lay in bed before falling asleep. It’s a nice note to go to sleep on. It’s a nice way to frame your story with what you did, instead of what you didn’t.

                   3. Let Go: Get rid of one thing a day for 30 days.– We have so much clutter surrounding us at any given moment (at the office, in our cars, in our homes) and often we’ve become so accustomed to it that we no longer notice how it affects us.  If you start cleaning up some of this external clutter, a lot of internal clutter disappears as well.  When we sold our house and packed all our belongings in storage units and went off to travel Mexico I can verify that there was an energy draw to the things I owned in that storage facility. The things we own, even if they aren’t near us, tie up our energy. Choose one needless item each and every day and get rid of it.  It’s that simple.  It might be difficult at first, so expect some resistance.  But after some time you will begin to learn to let go of “things”, and your mind will thank you for your efforts. Take a box of old clothes to Goodwill. Get rid of a vase that you’ve never really loved. Throw out those water bottles clanking around in the backseat of your car. Take down that picture you’ve had on your wall for 20 years and find something new and fresh that you love, clean out your music collection, sell off the DVDs you no longer want. This can be fun. Let Go! – Pay down a debt. Get rid of a bad relationship that causes you pain. Your options are many. Your surroundings are the stage in which your story takes place. Make it a place that you love – a place that feeds your energy, not drains it – a place where your best stories can play out.

                   4. Give the benefit of the doubt – My father and I got in a spat over politics. On the way home from his house my son and I were discussing the issue, and as I shared my frustration and lack of understanding as to the party my father supported my son reminded me to give him the benefit of the doubt. While it may not make sense why so many people voted in a direction I thought was completely amoral, my son reminded me that I had to give people the benefit of the doubt that their reasons for voting that way were not based on a complete lack of ethics, morals and intelligence. Maybe they are focused on only one part of the candidate rather than the whole package…or some such thing. Sometimes, especially when we don’t understand something, giving the benefit of the doubt can be the only way.

                   I’ve been told that my communications via e-mail and text are often too direct, without emotion. This stems from the fact that I’m not generally a flowery person, more straight to the point, but without facial expression and body language it can be interpreted as stark. I begged Matt, my podcasting partner, the other day to give me the benefit of the doubt in our communications because I don’t ever mean to offend, but I’m not great at adding heart emoticons and smiley faces. In fact, sometimes after I write an email I have to back to the top and add in all the “How are you” lines that one would generally exchange in person. I really appreciate it when people give me the benefit of the doubt that I’m not being a jerk.

                   There are always places where we can take offense. People rub up against each other (metaphorically speaking), it’s what we do. There are rubs and irritants, and miscommunications all day long. But if everyone gave one another the benefit of the doubt that they meant well, that they are doing the best they can in their current state of understanding and in their current situation, I suspect life would generate a whole lot less friction and we would create grace for others. I know I’m always grateful when people afford me a little grace and create stories that are generous and kind rather than being quick to take offense.

                   5. Meditate – Meditation is quite the buzz word. On Entrepreneur on Fire podcast, the top entrepreneurs very often talk about how meditation helps them be the top performers they are. In The Universe has your Back by Gabby Bernstein, she goes into great detail about the power of meditation. It’s a key spiritual practice for her. I’m trained in Transcendental Meditation and I notice that often when I am meditating, slowing my mind down for 20 minutes, that it is these moments when very needful things that have been lost in the hustle of my mind pop up to the surface so I can take care of them. I find it also rejuvenates me for the rest of the day. I sometimes even fall asleep – and that’s okay too, frankly. Aside from what I find, or what Gabby finds, or the what the EO Fire entrepreneur’s find, science also finds that meditation improves your health, both mental and physical. It calms, clarifies, creates flow. So, even though you are busy, I highly suggest you find 10 minutes every day to sit in a place where you can be alone, close your eyes, and focus on your breathe. Try to get your mind to place of quiet – this is why we focus on the breathing – on the present moment of the body, not on all the tangents the brain can conjure up. Use any technique you like, but notice the difference and create the possibility of calm, of communication with ideas and spirit, of just taking care of yourself. It’s a worthwhile investment that can put a whole new spin on your story.

                   That’s it! My five suggestions. Do these 5 simple things for 30 days. Write them down and put them where you can see them every morning. Ready:  1. Find the lesson in difficult situations. 2. Success file  3. Get rid of one thing a day for 30 days. 4. Give the benefit of the doubt. 5. Meditate.

                   Make it fun! Be consistent! And see how different your perspective, your relationships, your home and space, and your mind-set is in just one month! It’s exciting to think about. Then hop on www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and share your thoughts, your experiences, and your results with me. I promise to respond to every post. I am excited to hear from you. And one piece of advice. Don’t be hard on yourself. If you miss a day, start again the next day. If it’s difficult at first to give someone the benefit of the doubt, just practice it, do what you can. That’s why we have 30 days to practice, because new behaviors and ways of thinking take practice and you won’t get them right all the time. And that’s okay!

                   See you next week on the next episode of Love Your Story podcast. Please share this podcast with a friend and sign up for our weekly challenge on www.loveyourstorypodcast.com.

                    

                    

                    

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1510Wed, 11 Jan 2017 17:17:38 -070015:14falsefullSince we become what we repeatedly do, and we do what we repeatedly think about it makes a great deal of sense that we purposefully create thoughts and habits that will help us become who we want to be. Habits that create the story and life we want for ourselves and our loved ones. Habits that strengthen, build and empower us. Often these habits are very linked to the stories we have going on in our minds.Lori LeeEpisode 016 Stories Are Models — Interview with Lynne McNeill, Professor of FolkloreStories are models of how to live.  We often look to how others do things in order to determine how we should do things. Stories are often the vehicle in which these models are exchanged. Today we learn that when our life stories don’t turn out in a way that fits our cultural models we can listen to stories from others to find additional worthwhile ways to create our lives. Today I interview Lynne McNeill, a professor of Folklore at Utah State University. Come along and listen to her considerable expertise in story and what we can learn from becoming aware of our stories, the stories of those around us, and the co-creation of meaning that results.

                   Podcast Interview: Lynne McNeill, Utah State University, English Department

                   See her TEDx talk here: http://tedx.usu.edu/portfolio-items/lynne-mcneill/

                   ]]>Stories are models of how to live.  We often look to how others do things in order to determine how we should do things. Stories are often the vehicle in which these models are exchanged. Today we learn that when our life stories don’t turn out in a way that fits our cultural models we can listen to stories from others to find additional worthwhile ways to create our lives. Today I interview Lynne McNeill, a professor of Folklore at Utah State University. Come along and listen to her considerable expertise in story and what we can learn from becoming aware of our stories, the stories of those around us, and the co-creation of meaning that results.

                   Podcast Interview: Lynne McNeill, Utah State University, English Department

                   See her TEDx talk here: http://tedx.usu.edu/portfolio-items/lynne-mcneill/

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1479Wed, 04 Jan 2017 09:00:17 -070025:31falsefullStories are models of how to live. We often look to how others do things in order to determine how we should do things. Stories are often the vehicle in which these models are exchanged. Today we learn that when our life stories don't turn out in a way that fits our cultural models we can listen to stories from others to find additional worthwhile ways to create our lives. Today I interview Lynne McNeill, a professor of Folklore at Utah State University. Come along and listen to her considerable expertise in story, and what we can learn from becoming aware of our stories, the stories of those around us, and the co-creation of meaning that results.Lori LeeEpisode 015 Finding Your Voice – Interview with Amy Donaldson Brass, Sports ReporterTell YOUR truth. Find YOUR voice. Sing YOUR song. Today I interview Amy Donaldson Brass about what it took to find her own voice in the male-dominated world of sports reporting. Come along and listen to our first interview as Amy tells her story.

                   Podcast Interview: Amy Donaldson Brass, Sports Reporter for the Deseret News, Salt Lake City, Utah.

                   For more information on Amy go to: http://www.deseretnews.com/author/5017/Amy-Donaldson.html

                   ]]>Tell YOUR truth. Find YOUR voice. Sing YOUR song. Today I interview Amy Donaldson Brass about what it took to find her own voice in the male-dominated world of sports reporting. Come along and listen to our first interview as Amy tells her story.

                   Podcast Interview: Amy Donaldson Brass, Sports Reporter for the Deseret News, Salt Lake City, Utah.

                   For more information on Amy go to: http://www.deseretnews.com/author/5017/Amy-Donaldson.html

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1471Wed, 28 Dec 2016 09:00:34 -070027:45falsefullTell YOUR truth. Find YOUR voice. Sing YOUR song. Today I interview Amy Donaldson Brass about what it took to find her own voice in the male-dominated world of sports reporting. Come along and listen to our first interview as Amy tells her story.Lori LeeEpisode 014 Personal Narrative – How We Reveal OurselvesPersonal Narrative – How We Reveal Ourselves

                   When we talk to one another we engage in a ritual. Most people, of course, don’t think of it that way, but there are distinct patterns we follow in verbal exchanges. One type of exchange is the sharing of stories. The way we tell our stories to each other allows us to do so many things: build reputation, share awe, warn, teach, threaten, celebrate and explore, among others. Today we’ll discuss how we use stories to reveal ourselves and to reflect others.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   During my study of the personal narrative, I used Erving Goffman’s research and writings on the interaction ritual a great deal. I studied his work in detail because the idea of a simple conversation being a complex ritual was fascinating. As I broke apart his work I marveled that a mind could take apart such common everyday actions and find these patterns. But he was right on. We do follow patterns when we talk with one another, and as he discovered, “face” is the pivot point of the ritual.

                   Let me share some definitions:

                   “Face” as Goffman defines it, is the “positive social value a person effectively claims for himself by the line others assume he has taken during a particular contact.” One might consider this your base reputation.

                   A “line” is a pattern of verbal and non-verbal acts by which he expresses his view of the situation. Something like one’s perspective on a topic.

                   If a person is “in face” then the encounter allows that person to sustain an image of oneself that he/she is comfortable with and frankly takes for granted. Which means that your reputation is in-line with what you are comfortable with.

                   If a person is “out of face” it means that information has been brought forth that does not sustain the face being held for that person. Or, in other words, that the person has not maintained their reputation. For example, if someone considers themselves smart, and they are considered smart in their social groups, and they do something foolish, they are “out of face.”

                   “Face work” is action taken to make whatever he/she is doing consistent with the “face” he/she has established. So, you’re working to maintain your reputation as whatever you are comfortable with by the things you say and do.

                   “Poise” is the ability to suppress and conceal any tendency to become shamefaced during encounters.

                   To “Save Face” is a process by which a person sustains an impression for others that he has not lost face.

                   To “Give Face” is to arrange for another to get a better line than he could have gotten otherwise. So, perhaps to brag someone up upon introduction, which is not something they could have done for themselves.

                   You get the idea here. Basic concepts we understand and take for granted in our exchanges are actually part of a ritual that we intuitively understand because we have learned it through our cultural upbringing. So why do I want to take this apart? We are always discussing in this podcast how the power of story is a powerful tool. And, as I say in the beginning of every podcast, “power works best when you know how to use it.” Understanding how we use our stories, and what they do for us in these ritual exchanges, every day, allows us to purposefully manage “face” and understand what it means when we share parts of ourselves and our stories. By the time this episode is over you will have a greater awareness of how and why you use your stories in these exchanges.

                   One of the important aspects of “face”...]]>Personal Narrative – How We Reveal Ourselves

                   When we talk to one another we engage in a ritual. Most people, of course, don’t think of it that way, but there are distinct patterns we follow in verbal exchanges. One type of exchange is the sharing of stories. The way we tell our stories to each other allows us to do so many things: build reputation, share awe, warn, teach, threaten, celebrate and explore, among others. Today we’ll discuss how we use stories to reveal ourselves and to reflect others.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   During my study of the personal narrative, I used Erving Goffman’s research and writings on the interaction ritual a great deal. I studied his work in detail because the idea of a simple conversation being a complex ritual was fascinating. As I broke apart his work I marveled that a mind could take apart such common everyday actions and find these patterns. But he was right on. We do follow patterns when we talk with one another, and as he discovered, “face” is the pivot point of the ritual.

                   Let me share some definitions:

                   “Face” as Goffman defines it, is the “positive social value a person effectively claims for himself by the line others assume he has taken during a particular contact.” One might consider this your base reputation.

                   A “line” is a pattern of verbal and non-verbal acts by which he expresses his view of the situation. Something like one’s perspective on a topic.

                   If a person is “in face” then the encounter allows that person to sustain an image of oneself that he/she is comfortable with and frankly takes for granted. Which means that your reputation is in-line with what you are comfortable with.

                   If a person is “out of face” it means that information has been brought forth that does not sustain the face being held for that person. Or, in other words, that the person has not maintained their reputation. For example, if someone considers themselves smart, and they are considered smart in their social groups, and they do something foolish, they are “out of face.”

                   “Face work” is action taken to make whatever he/she is doing consistent with the “face” he/she has established. So, you’re working to maintain your reputation as whatever you are comfortable with by the things you say and do.

                   “Poise” is the ability to suppress and conceal any tendency to become shamefaced during encounters.

                   To “Save Face” is a process by which a person sustains an impression for others that he has not lost face.

                   To “Give Face” is to arrange for another to get a better line than he could have gotten otherwise. So, perhaps to brag someone up upon introduction, which is not something they could have done for themselves.

                   You get the idea here. Basic concepts we understand and take for granted in our exchanges are actually part of a ritual that we intuitively understand because we have learned it through our cultural upbringing. So why do I want to take this apart? We are always discussing in this podcast how the power of story is a powerful tool. And, as I say in the beginning of every podcast, “power works best when you know how to use it.” Understanding how we use our stories, and what they do for us in these ritual exchanges, every day, allows us to purposefully manage “face” and understand what it means when we share parts of ourselves and our stories. By the time this episode is over you will have a greater awareness of how and why you use your stories in these exchanges.

                   One of the important aspects of “face” that must be acknowledged is that while everyone varies to some degree in how much they claim to care about what others think, everyone has a vision of themselves they wish to portray. This self-image is deeply meaningful to each of us and emotional responses are attached to it. Goffman points out that when we are in social situations where our “face” plays out as it should, we feel good and confident. But if we have an encounter where our ordinary expectations of face are not maintained we feel bad, hurt, or ashamed. These acknowledgements of the emotional import of maintaining “face” and its impact on our ability to function well establishes the serious nature of this ritual and the ritual outcome.

                   So, here’s the kicker – while this social “face” can be one of our most personal possessions, it IS on loan from society. It can be revoked by others if we don’t live up to the “face” we’ve built, or we don’t engage in the ritual properly. For example, one aspect of the ritual is that when someone is ready to leave the ritual they will start using phrases or body language to turn away or cut off conversation. It the other person in the ritual /conversation doesn’t get the clues being dropped and continues to talk and talk, it is likely that people will avoid talking to this person in the future if this is an ongoing oversight. Know what I mean? Hence the natural inclination for each of us to carefully and appropriately navigate through our communication rituals. One of the ways this is done is through the stories we share and our ability to live up to those stories.

                   For example, let’s say a new student arrives on campus and is quite vocal sharing experiences and stories about their successes at the school they’ve just transferred from. The student is in the drama department and they claim many experiences with leading roles and much acting exposure on the stage. The student drops names and techniques and talks the talk, but when it comes time to walk the walk her performance does not match the face she has claimed. She has used stories about her past experiences that show her to be experienced and strong in her field of singing, dancing and acting, but upon performing she is unable to keep this face. In which case, she is now ‘out of face’ with her society. Her reputation then changes to be not only one that does not live up to her stories, but is now also jaded by the shadow of mistrust. This is what face is and how it works. Now let’s look at some other conversational techniques.

                   In my thesis research, I discovered the fun phenomenon of what I call “plugging into the domino train.” This is where one person tells a story and those listening automatically start scanning the filing cabinets of their minds for links to their own stories. For example, eight of us were sitting in a yurt one evening after a day of biking. We were just kicking back and talking about nothing in particular. One person mentions that he connects well with older people, and how they trust him. I believe he was specifically referring to his grandparents. Another participant finds a story in his stash of experiences that illustrates him as someone who is also trusted by “older people.” He plugs his story into the conversational domino train, so to speak, and takes over the conversation with his tale of how he used to work for an older gentleman who had health issues, and how he became good friends with this man and a trusted family confidant.  While he is telling his story, everyone else in the group has that mental machine running at full speed also. If during his story he mentions something and someone else has a similar story, then upon his completion the person will/can/may try to plug into the conversational domino train with their story. So, for instance, let’s say that during his story about working for this older gentlemen, he expressed that the man was a university professor and had a beautiful collection of old books that the city had asked him to donate to a special collection in the library. Those listening to the story will simply be scanning for points of connection as they listen. Do they have a story or experience with a beautiful collection of books, or the city asking for a donation, or helping the elderly? They can plug in at any point to which they can find a tie, it simply depends upon them having an experience to connect with. It’s how conversation works. This is why when we speak with someone with whom we have things in common the conversation is much smoother than it is with someone who has different interests. I once went out with a guy who did very little outdoor recreation. The date went fine, but I was having a hard time finding common ground for discussion. We stopped by his apartment for him to grab something, and his roommate was there. As I sat and made conversation with his roommate, I found that he was an avid outdoorsman. Our conversation flew. We talked non-stop, with no awkward moments of trying to fill the silence, while his roommate found whatever it was he was looking for. The contrast for me was so stark that I still remember the pretty meaningless event years later. Unless we are skilled conversationalists who are not constantly stuck inside our own heads, and we understand how to ask questions and delve into another’s experiences, the conversation will die upon running out of common ground, or it will drone on as one person talks only about themselves.

                   So, let’s go back to this space where someone in the conversation is telling a story, our minds are scanning for a way to plug into what they are talking about, and let’s say that your scanning brings up a story about you and the city making a request from you (so you can plug in there) but your story involves a nefarious plot where you were caught stealing a book, let’s say. When this experience/story comes to mind you will automatically scan it to decide if telling this story will allow you to maintain an acceptable “face” with the people who are in the conversation. So, for example, you may be with a group of friends for whom stealing a book would be funny or acceptable – in which case you would choose to share the story because you could maintain the face you are comfortable with within this group. On the other hand, if you were with your parents, for instance, this may not be a story you would choose to tell. So, the mind is constantly scanning for ways to socially engage, but it is also protecting your socially constructed face by sifting through which stories you will share with which audiences. This is managing face with your stories.

                   Within the outdoor recreation folk group, or in my case, a group of my friends, stories are always being told. We create stories with every adventure and as I started listening closely and dissecting their stories I started to find how our stories create the masks we wear.

                   In our society, it is not looked upon favorably to walk up to others and begin talking about how cool you are and bragging about the things you’re good at. If you do that you automatically repel the people around you and you lose face for not understanding how the ritual works. It’s a ritually destructive move for your ‘face’ as a competent conversationalist. On the other hand, it IS perfectly acceptable for you to share a story that promotes a positive self-image and provides proof, through action, of your skills and accomplishments.

                   For example, one day my son and I and a friend were riding the ziplines at the Park City Olympic Park. We were racing and my son and I were teasing each other about who won and who lost. He claimed he lost because a branch hit him. This triggered the “domino train” for my friend who then started telling a story about being hit by a branch while he was riding at high speeds on a trail on the Hawaiian islands. As he told the story of biking, in what sounded like jungle, and the branch that struck out and gave him a vicious bite, he established through his tale that 1. He is serious enough about mountain biking that he will partake of the sport even in remote places. 2. That he has a certain skill set to ride in the conditions he described, and 3. That he was a little extreme because he could claim bite marks by a plant that had actually left scars. He was able to relay information about himself through the story in a form that was acceptable and starts to build his face, or reinforce the face we already know.

                   Within the outdoor recreation folk group there are a number of sorting processes going on as people talk among themselves. No one ever spells these out, they are the unwritten sorting taking place in our minds. One of these is that as we tell our stories we are imparting information about our legitimacy inside the group. The trails or areas we refer to, the sports we participate in, how often we participate and at what level tell the listener if we are a poser, a beginner, a weekend warrior or an expert. This presentation of self is enfolded in a story that is told to relive the past, share an experience, encourage, share awe, or any number of other functions, but couched in that primary purpose is also a load of information about the teller. We see, in action, that person providing proof as to his/her abilities and interactions with the world. This is one form of self-presentation among many. The stories confirm to ourselves and to others who we are.

                   So, if this is the case, and we are subconsciously or automatically sorting and editing our stories anyway, what if we managed them?

                   “McAdams, in his paper Psychology of Life Stories, says, “Life stories are psychosocial constructions, co-authored by the person himself or herself and the cultural context within which that person’s life is embedded and given meaning. As such, individual life stories reflect cultural values and norms, including assumptions about gender, race and class.”

                   Stories organize and show our motivations. They show us in action. People act for the sake of what they want and what they believe in, so stories show us rather than tell us a great deal about ourselves and others. They also allow us to show others who we are, and they portray the culture and world that we live in as well.

                   Man, we can sure get a lot of information out of a simple story. And, there’s more, so much more…but for this week, your challenge is to write out a list of your best qualities. Then find a story that provides proof of you exhibiting these qualities. If you feel you are a loyal person, find a story of a time you showed loyalty to someone. If you feel you are honest, find a story that exemplifies this quality in you. If you can’t find any examples, then you get to consider that maybe you are not as loyal or honest as you like to believe, and you can make life and living adjustments accordingly. But as you find the stories of you living up to these qualities you will see how they can be used to define and clarify yourself, not only to others but also to you. You may even want to ask your friends about their most memorable stories with you and then take a look at what those stories show you doing. Our identities develop as a result of our social experiences and our relationships with others. In fact, identity itself is a story.  But, as we have discussed in many other episodes, we get to manage those stories. Our power is in the acceptance of the messiness and realness of our stories (episode 8) because we can’t truly thrive without an acceptance and love of ourselves, and we cannot give what is not ours. But our stories are uniquely ours. Your story is uniquely yours. You have a unique voice and you can only tell the story that you know how to tell, but that’s exactly the story that should be told. That story comes from a complex social construct, but your identity is formed and reinforced by the stories you create and tell about yourself. Manage those stories by focusing on the ones that exemplify your strengths, not the stories that compare or discourage.

                   Have fun this week out there telling your stories. Remember that what we focus on is what we create. Focus on the stories of your awesome moments! I promise – you have them. See you next week on the Love Your Story podcast.

                    

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1467Wed, 21 Dec 2016 09:00:24 -070019:05falsefullWhen we talk to one another we engage in a ritual. Most people, of course, don’t think of it that way, but there are distinct patterns we follow in verbal exchanges. One type of exchange is the sharing of stories. The way we tell our stories to each other allows us to do so many things: build reputation, share awe, warn, teach, threaten, celebrate and explore, among others. Today we’ll discuss how we use stories to reveal ourselves and to reflect others.Lori LeeEpisode 013 Holding Hands–Some thoughts on Connection

                   Holding Hands–Reaching out to the Characters in YOUR Story.

                    

                   I lay by my son as he falls asleep. He curls his small cherub 4-year-old body next to mine and he wraps his little hand around my thumb. “I love you too,” he says. Then follows it with, “Say that to me.”

                   As children we come into the world ready to grab hands, but having a hand only large enough to grab a finger – we start by wrapping five tiny fingers around the larger one of a caregiver –we do it without hesitation as we figure out how to reach out and connect, hold on to one another. In the case of my son, we even ask for what we need. As we get older we are much more careful about breaking those boundaries. We are careful to stay in our own spaces and too often we forget to reach out to one another. Today’s podcast is about connecting with touch: it’s about holding hands and how human touch links us, literally closes the gap between people, and how important that is – to all of us.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Last week we spoke about random acts of kindness and the stories we can participate in by keeping our eyes open for small, kind, daily acts. This week, we’re talking about holding hands.

                   There is a photo of me with my two sons, the youngest sitting on my lap, my hands unintentionally wrapped with his, our fingers interlaced, my thumbs caressing the backs of his soft, sweet, pudgy, three-year-old hand. It’s not something we pay attention to, just something we do.

                   In another memory, we cut our way across the Albertson’s parking lot and he hollers, “Mom, hold my hand so I don’t get run over.” His voice is high and sweet, and as quickly as I take his hand he decides he wants to brave it on his own and practice stepping over cracks.

                   A dance takes place as we interact. We reach out, we pull back, we want to know we are not alone, but we don’t want to be held back either. It’s a tricky two-step.

                   To hold someone’s hand is to connect: to offer friendship, protection, comfort, to make your way undivided through a crowd, to guide, to show affection. The Beatles sang “I want to hold your ha a and.” And the world sang with them.

                   In a world where we can feel alone in a sea of a million people, the chance to hold another’s hand can be a gift, an anchor, a place where for that moment you are not alone. For that moment you are joining forces. A joining of hands is a human action that allows us to connect, communicate, and exchange energy in a meaningful way. For however long the moment lasts we are unafraid to touch. And that is a beautiful moment.

                   I sat on a plane, flying home from Ohio, after our final weekend in an emotional intelligence workshop that had lasted 3 months. The people in that workshop had become family, and I lived thousands of miles away, in Utah. There was a good chance I wouldn’t see most of them again.  We spent months working together on projects and learning, through the good and the bad, how to work together, play team, and love each other. After plenty of annoyance, quiet thoughts of frustration, numbers of calls to my life coach, I am proud to say that I finally came to a place of loving each of my team members for exactly where they were, taking them for their good and their bad and loving them in their own space – without...]]>

                   Holding Hands–Reaching out to the Characters in YOUR Story.

                    

                   I lay by my son as he falls asleep. He curls his small cherub 4-year-old body next to mine and he wraps his little hand around my thumb. “I love you too,” he says. Then follows it with, “Say that to me.”

                   As children we come into the world ready to grab hands, but having a hand only large enough to grab a finger – we start by wrapping five tiny fingers around the larger one of a caregiver –we do it without hesitation as we figure out how to reach out and connect, hold on to one another. In the case of my son, we even ask for what we need. As we get older we are much more careful about breaking those boundaries. We are careful to stay in our own spaces and too often we forget to reach out to one another. Today’s podcast is about connecting with touch: it’s about holding hands and how human touch links us, literally closes the gap between people, and how important that is – to all of us.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Last week we spoke about random acts of kindness and the stories we can participate in by keeping our eyes open for small, kind, daily acts. This week, we’re talking about holding hands.

                   There is a photo of me with my two sons, the youngest sitting on my lap, my hands unintentionally wrapped with his, our fingers interlaced, my thumbs caressing the backs of his soft, sweet, pudgy, three-year-old hand. It’s not something we pay attention to, just something we do.

                   In another memory, we cut our way across the Albertson’s parking lot and he hollers, “Mom, hold my hand so I don’t get run over.” His voice is high and sweet, and as quickly as I take his hand he decides he wants to brave it on his own and practice stepping over cracks.

                   A dance takes place as we interact. We reach out, we pull back, we want to know we are not alone, but we don’t want to be held back either. It’s a tricky two-step.

                   To hold someone’s hand is to connect: to offer friendship, protection, comfort, to make your way undivided through a crowd, to guide, to show affection. The Beatles sang “I want to hold your ha a and.” And the world sang with them.

                   In a world where we can feel alone in a sea of a million people, the chance to hold another’s hand can be a gift, an anchor, a place where for that moment you are not alone. For that moment you are joining forces. A joining of hands is a human action that allows us to connect, communicate, and exchange energy in a meaningful way. For however long the moment lasts we are unafraid to touch. And that is a beautiful moment.

                   I sat on a plane, flying home from Ohio, after our final weekend in an emotional intelligence workshop that had lasted 3 months. The people in that workshop had become family, and I lived thousands of miles away, in Utah. There was a good chance I wouldn’t see most of them again.  We spent months working together on projects and learning, through the good and the bad, how to work together, play team, and love each other. After plenty of annoyance, quiet thoughts of frustration, numbers of calls to my life coach, I am proud to say that I finally came to a place of loving each of my team members for exactly where they were, taking them for their good and their bad and loving them in their own space – without judgment.  It’s not very often that one gets to a fully loving consensus with a group of 44 different people – I’d never felt anything like it, and to leave them, like high school graduation, required an acceptance that things would never again be like they had been, because they couldn’t. Remember episode 11 and how we can’t step in the same river twice.  As I felt the wheels of the plane lift off the tarmac it was the official separation from Ohio as I flew back to Utah, into the light-blue fall sky and away from the place, the people, the experiences. I reached across the seat and grabbed the hand of my friend who was sitting next to the window. The center seat was empty except for our hands clasped together as the flight gained altitude. Her grip was firm and comforting as I was present to the moment of leaving and the tears that ran down my cheek. We said nothing, just grasped hands as the wheels left the tarmac.

                   Human chains have been formed to demonstrate solidarity in a cause. Chains have been created that included millions of human beings, linking hands to boycott nuclear missiles, to call for peace, to seek for independence. Children link hands for a game of Red Rover – when the group is successful the chain in unbreakable. We hold hands during funerals, marches, vigils, and weddings. When the World Trade towers collapsed I watched people leaping from the impossible height, hand in hand. Falling together…together.

                   A couple months ago Annie Schmidt disappeared while hiking in Portland. She was from Utah, a beautiful young lady who had recently moved to Oregon. I look at her pictures, the gorgeous young woman full of life, and I am devastated. I know a bit about her family and I can’t help but put myself in her mother’s place, in her father’s place, and I struggle to hold back the tears. I think of my son who was diagnosed with Leukemia this summer. He is also a beautiful human being, a gorgeous, strong young man with a champion spirit, a solid heart, and a 5-star smile. He doesn’t complain as he fights. He gets up, eventually, and tries to go about his day in a meaningful fashion. My mind once or twice has looked into the ugly abyss of the possibility of losing him, but I push it away as quickly as it appears because my eyes tear up and my throat closes. I watch the news and the Sioux Indians fighting against the pipeline being pushed through their land, peeling back the plains the wild buffalo still run on in North Dakota. People are out there fighting for the things they love. They are fighting for their children, they are fighting for their relationships, they are fighting for their land, they are fighting for their lives. This world is not for the weak. The journey to create and preserve relationships is not for the weak. The journey of fighting disease is not for the weak. The journey of standing up for your rights and the things you think are important, against often what feels like unbeatable odds is not for the weak. The journey to keep putting one foot in front of the other when someone you love leaves you through death or some other reason. This is not for the weak either.  So as we try to find our strength in the midst of our battles, hold hands. Hold hands because the feeling of having someone’s hand close around your own is the forming of a chain – linking two people together in love, in support, in joy, in being, in power.

                   Between lovers, couples, family, the human race, holding hands remains a sign of intimacy. Simple, but powerful. So much is said, is felt in a gesture. From intimately intertwined fingers, to the grasp across an airline seat, to a train of people tying themselves to one another so no one gets lost, to crossing the road with a child…there are a hundred reasons to hold hands, but they all come down to connecting, and connecting is why we are here. Thich Nhat Hanh said, “We are here to awaken from the illusion of our separateness.” While this illusion is understandably difficult to break through, reaching out to hug someone, to hold a hand, physically bridges the gap for a moment.

                   Martha Beck, International Life Coach, said, “Relationships are the most important human experience available to us. I realized in my twenties that the meaning of life is not about what happens to people; it’s about what happens between people. Learning to connect with each other, to experience empathy, to step outside our own experience, and to experience love in all its forms—these, I believe, are the experiences for which we became human.”

                   In Galatians 6:2 it says, “Bear ye one another’s burdens…”  When we reach out to grasp another person, to touch in a world filled with apparent separation. When we reach out to lift, to comfort, even just to connect with the squeeze of a hand there is an exchange of energy. An exchange that says, you’re not alone.

                   Driving home from Brianhead after a weekend of painful bliss on the mountain bike, there is a young blond child on her father’s shoulders staring at me from a billboard, her hands raised above her head, the American flag grasped in her pudgy fingers, the words UNITY blaring in black block letters.  I’m listening to the Disney Spirit soundtrack and there is an orchestral crescendo as I speed by.  It is moving in its own way.

                   I am returning from the Fat Tire Festival at Brianhead where along with seven others I was shuttled to and from some of the best mountain bike trails in the West.  Thunder Mountain, seven miles of intermediate to advanced up and down sequences through and above red hoodoos and alpine canyons, was amazingly scenic, but the hills were kicking my butt.

                   Jason, a much better rider than I, peddled behind me yelling, “Shift down!  You can do it!  Go! Go! Go!”  So I pushed harder even when I wanted to stop and cry.  I become more because he stayed with me and reached out.

                   At major junctions and intersections on the trail the faster riders in our group stopped and waited for those in the rear.  It was not required, but it united us in a way where, though at times we rode with no one else in sight, we knew we were not alone.  We were making sure no one got lost, took the wrong path, got hurt, felt left out.

                   In Sunday School, or was it first grade, the teacher held up one popsicle stick and easily broke it.  She then added five or six to the stack and the pile could no longer be broken.  As I drove down the interstate, four lanes on each side, I wondered how many people were crying?  How many people were excited about where they were headed as they sped along?  How many people were alone or lonely?  How five or six, or even two of us are stronger together than just a single stick resisting the pressures.

                   In the shuttle van and on the trail there were packets of energy gel and peanut butter shared back and forth as energy waned.  People from the group were taking my photo at scenic overlooks and offering to send copies.  Synergy, the interaction of different things so that their combined effect is greater than the sum of individual effects, is an exponential empowerment. If I give what I have to give, and you give what you have to give, we both have more.  And if I give and you do not, I still have more because I become more than I was before I gave, and we are both richer for it. When I reach out to you, and you reach out to me, and we pull each other up when we are face-down in the arena (remember from episode 7) we become stronger because we are not alone.

                   Near Ogden Utah there is a billboard of Mother Teresa her hands reaching out to an unseen other, the words “reaching beyond yourself” emblazoned below her picture.  I scratch a note to call my friend that just had her baby and see how she is doing.  I’m thinking about the givers and takers of the world. There are times we will need the help, someone to encourage us up the hill, take us to dinner, call and check on us, take our hand; and there are times when we are lucky enough to be the giver.  It takes both.

                   There is a beautiful piece of thin navy paper, an iridescent blue-green feather pasted down one side, a poem entitled “The Gift of an Angel by Your Side,” on the other, a small gold and blue pin with the words “blue bird of happiness” attached at the top, a hundred dollar bill and a friend’s handwriting beside the pin that says “Fly!”.  It was handed to me during a difficult transitional time in a plain brown envelope with a hug and the direction to open when needed.

                   When your butt is kicked and a rider on the trail offers you her packet of GU, you love that rider.  When you’ve taken all you can take and you’re about to bonk, that energy gel is not just a .99 cent package of rice syrup, potassium and caffeine, it’s pure gold, and sometimes it saves your life.  Sometimes just knowing there is someone that cares enough to ride behind you hollering  “You can do it!”  says as much as a billboard. Sometimes the human race shines. And sometimes reaching out and holding another person’s hand says more than words because it says, in a gesture, I am with you, you are not alone, and we can cross this dangerous street together. And sometimes when someone reaches for your hand they are saying “I love you too, now say that to me.”

                   We come programmed to hold onto one another. We arrive hardwired to grasp hands, and if we are lucky and wise, we don’t lose our grip.

                   Your challenge for this week is to reach out more than you usually would. Use your wonderful hands to close the gap between you and someone you love, someone who needs you, or just because you want to connect. Bridge the gap.

                   Have fun telling and creating your stories this week, and I’ll see you next week on the next episode of Love Your Story Podcast. PS – Pass this podcast onto your friends and go to our website: www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and sign up for our weekly challenge/inspiration.

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1463Wed, 14 Dec 2016 09:00:04 -070016:10falsefullReaching out to hold another person's hand connects us, for a moment, body to body in a world where separateness is all too real. Reaching out, touching, and connecting - a few thoughts on bridging the gaps between us.Lori LeeEpisode 012 Random Acts of Kindness – Creating a mysteryRandom Acts of Kindness – Creating a Mystery

                   The Dalai Lama said, “Right from the moment of our birth, we are under the care and kindness of our parents, and then later on in our life, when we are oppressed by sickness and become old we are again dependent on the kindness of others. Since at the beginning and the end of our lives we are so dependent on other’s kindness, how can it be that in the middle we neglect kindness toward others?”

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Last week I told a story about floating down the San Juan river and how the people and experiences in our lives become touchstones of meaning and milestones for us. This week we’ll talk about why kindness is more important than ever and how we create our own mystery stories.

                   In the timeline of the history of the world, our day is unlike any other. The speed at which we communicate and transact business is instantaneous compared with past forms of communication that ranged from only being unable to communicate with someone that was directly in front of you, to currier by horse or pigeon which could take weeks or months depending upon how far away the communication was being sent, to telegraphs, to home phones, sitting in front of the large home radio, television, or computer and eventually the internet and the crazy small devices that we can carry with us everywhere now. This of course, leaves out the eras taken to develop symbols and alphabets in the first place to be able to communicate outside of pictographs and petroglyphs. It’s been a long road. We are so connected now, with so many people, that the common person with a cell phone has a monumental voice to tell their stories to the entire on-line world with a reach completely unprecedented. Social media has given rise to the voice of the masses – to anyone who wants to speak. There is no more silence, no more getting permission, no more waiting for the powers-that-be to approve what the masses know. Today with a cell phone and a computer you are your own publisher, your own promoter. You can be connected to almost anyone, almost anywhere, even someone on the other side of the world. So, here’s the irony: this is also the time the Huffington Post called, “The Age of Loneliness.” There are lots of reports and articles written on this subject, how we don’t like to admit we’re lonely because it’s a stigma associated with losers and loners, how the local community once revered and honored as a place where people knew and supported one another has become instead often a place where everyone is disconnected because they are so busy moving fast, or tapping in virtually to people they will never see. There are numerous reasons our society has become disconnected, all while appearing to be more connected than ever, but without this sense of community and personal connectedness, we are often left feeling lonely and lost. Our stories have more moments where we stand in a crowd and feel completely alone. I have felt this more times than I have tracked.

                   The other day I was listening to a podcast and the speaker pointed out research that showed that when we leave our cell phones on the table during lunch or during a conversation, that people will not delve into deep discussions. Conversation stays on a surface level because all participants know that they can be interrupted at any time, and sharing on deep personal levels is a vulnerable and personal space that requires one’s full attention. This is just one example of the many, many ways that...]]>Random Acts of Kindness – Creating a Mystery

                   The Dalai Lama said, “Right from the moment of our birth, we are under the care and kindness of our parents, and then later on in our life, when we are oppressed by sickness and become old we are again dependent on the kindness of others. Since at the beginning and the end of our lives we are so dependent on other’s kindness, how can it be that in the middle we neglect kindness toward others?”

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Last week I told a story about floating down the San Juan river and how the people and experiences in our lives become touchstones of meaning and milestones for us. This week we’ll talk about why kindness is more important than ever and how we create our own mystery stories.

                   In the timeline of the history of the world, our day is unlike any other. The speed at which we communicate and transact business is instantaneous compared with past forms of communication that ranged from only being unable to communicate with someone that was directly in front of you, to currier by horse or pigeon which could take weeks or months depending upon how far away the communication was being sent, to telegraphs, to home phones, sitting in front of the large home radio, television, or computer and eventually the internet and the crazy small devices that we can carry with us everywhere now. This of course, leaves out the eras taken to develop symbols and alphabets in the first place to be able to communicate outside of pictographs and petroglyphs. It’s been a long road. We are so connected now, with so many people, that the common person with a cell phone has a monumental voice to tell their stories to the entire on-line world with a reach completely unprecedented. Social media has given rise to the voice of the masses – to anyone who wants to speak. There is no more silence, no more getting permission, no more waiting for the powers-that-be to approve what the masses know. Today with a cell phone and a computer you are your own publisher, your own promoter. You can be connected to almost anyone, almost anywhere, even someone on the other side of the world. So, here’s the irony: this is also the time the Huffington Post called, “The Age of Loneliness.” There are lots of reports and articles written on this subject, how we don’t like to admit we’re lonely because it’s a stigma associated with losers and loners, how the local community once revered and honored as a place where people knew and supported one another has become instead often a place where everyone is disconnected because they are so busy moving fast, or tapping in virtually to people they will never see. There are numerous reasons our society has become disconnected, all while appearing to be more connected than ever, but without this sense of community and personal connectedness, we are often left feeling lonely and lost. Our stories have more moments where we stand in a crowd and feel completely alone. I have felt this more times than I have tracked.

                   The other day I was listening to a podcast and the speaker pointed out research that showed that when we leave our cell phones on the table during lunch or during a conversation, that people will not delve into deep discussions. Conversation stays on a surface level because all participants know that they can be interrupted at any time, and sharing on deep personal levels is a vulnerable and personal space that requires one’s full attention. This is just one example of the many, many ways that technology creates a lack of connection.

                   So why am I talking about our disconnection, our loneliness, our lack of community… not because I think we should all throw our phones away or disconnect our internet, but because there are little things we can do every day to change the disconnect, one act at a time, one generated story plot at a time.

                   Gandhi said, “The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.”

                   Thomas S. Monson, Prophet of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints said, “The Savior taught His disciples, “For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: but whosoever will lose his life for my sake, the same shall save it” (Luke [9:24]).

                   He goes on, “I believe the Savior is telling us that unless we lose ourselves in service to others, there is little purpose to our own lives. Those who live only for themselves eventually shrivel up and figuratively lose their lives, while those who lose themselves in service to others grow and flourish—and in effect save their lives.”

                   Or in other words, to write the best possible life story, where the hero’s life is saved in the end, that hero’s journey is going to need to be filled with a lot of looking outward, with kindness, with service, with moments of creating goodness for the sake of another. This is what makes the hero, and apparently, what saves his life in the end.

                   Did you know that Random Act of Kindness week is coming February 12-18? Neither did I, but I found the countdown clock and it’s drawing nearer with each passing second. On Randomactsofkindness.org they have lesson plans and calendars with RAK ideas for every day of the year. They are the Random Acts of Kindness Foundation. Who knew there was such a thing? But thank God there are people who are out there wanting to pour kindness into the world. Are you one of them?

                   I remember the first time I heard about RAK as a thing. It was in the 80’s and someone had gone around putting quarters in parking meters so folks wouldn’t get parking tickets. “What a great idea,” I thought. “So simple, so fun, and it has a really big WOW factor.” I’d never heard of any such thing. It was an ah-ha moment. I’ve grown to really like RAK’s because it’s become a bit of a game where the results are unknown. I pay for the guy behind me in the drive-thru – I have no idea how it will affect him. But I can bet, at the very least,  he’s going to feel a little warm and fuzzy, and that’s going to translate into better thoughts and actions on his part. Maybe he’s had a hard day at work and he’s tired and grumpy. Maybe my $10 secret donation will change how he interacts with his kids or his wife when he gets home. Maybe he’ll pass it on by doing something nice for someone else. Maybe he was down to his last $10 before pay day, no way of knowing any of this, but you can bet that it’s adding joy to the world and you get to imagine what your butterfly effect might be.

                   On the About Us page on Randomactsofkindness.org it says:

                   “We know how important kindness is because we’ve all felt how important it is. But that’s not the only reason we know. Scientific studies have shown that random acts of kindness are good for you! They improve your life satisfaction by increasing your sense of belonging and self- worth, and they improve your health by decreasing your anxiety, depression and blood pressure. And here’s the best part: these benefits apply to the giver of kindness, the recipient of kindness, and anyone who witnesses the act! Every act improves the lives of at least three people.”

                   Looking beyond one’s self is sometimes not the first thing that comes to mind. When things are going well for us for we are often caught up in doing what we want. When we hit hard times it’s usually not even on our radar, because when we are suffering we are in a space of self-involvement. We hurt, so we focus on ourselves and what we can do to relieve our own pain. Ironically, sometimes (in fact, quite often) the best medicine is to look outward. To quit thinking about ourselves and to focus on others. It has a high success rate for getting us out of our own heads. It’s exactly what Gandhi and Christ were talking about.

                   I have another quote on my fridge from John Wesley, it says, “Do all the good you can. By all the means you can. In all the ways you can. At all the times you can. To all the people you can. As long as ever you can.”  Even reading this quote makes me happy because the idea is a simple thought that breaks through any barriers or excuses why kindness shouldn’t be the response to any given situation. Every time I read it I smile, I get clear, and I think about what kindness I can show.

                   I’ve been trying over the past 3-4 months to really focus on random acts of kindness and sometimes it’s really hard to find one. So, I changed it to just ‘acts of kindness.’ They didn’t have to be random–that’s a little easier. Then my son proffered the idea that nothing is random according to his V-sauce research, so we called it, “unplanned acts of kindness.” But then I started feeling like in order to count them that they needed to be a kindness we wouldn’t usually do, and things like smiles and holding doors are things we would usually do. So it got more complicated and more complicated. When we’d had a hard day of finding random or ‘unplanned’ acts of kindness we began reporting back on simple things like going out of our way to have a more involved conversation with the checkout lady at the grocery store, or rushing to fill one another’s glasses at the dinner table so we could count that as an act of kindness. Suffice it to say, we are a work in progress…but what I think matters most, is that we pay enough attention, every day, to being just a little kinder and looking for that opportunity to add something kind to the world. It probably doesn’t matter what you name it, how big it is, or what it looks like, what matters is the way of living that it generates. A space of looking outward, of staying aware of who needs help, a habit of being thoughtful. Now I’m not saying I’m remembering every day – I’m not. I keep a little list on my phone so I can get excited when I look back and see all the good I’ve done, but also so I can track when I lose a week or two because I haven’t been paying attention. Like any good habit it takes practice. I think the key is like Rudyard Kipling said, “Delight in the little things.” Realize that by “small and simple things are great things brought to pass.” (Book of Mormon; Alma 37:6) Don’t let the idea of random acts of kindness overwhelm. One day I was walking my dog and I found a man trying to transfer a bunch of Halloween balloons from his car into a church. Instead, the balloons were blowing across the church lawn dancing and popping. I helped him round up the strays and secure them in the church. On another dog walk, there was a young man trying to stuff arm-fulls of raked leaves into a garbage bag he had hanging from the tree. He couldn’t get the bag to stay open the leaves just landed at his feet, all his hard work undone. I had the opportunity to hold his bag for him. It was a simple five minutes. I didn’t have to create it, I just had to be present and take the opportunity. There are probably more of those around us than we realize once we start paying attention.

                   As I mentioned earlier I often have a difficult time finding RAK ideas, so when I found Brad Aronson’s102 RAK suggestions on his web page, I stole some of them to add to my own list. Feel free to adapt any of these so they work in your world. Here’s a dozen ideas to get you started.

                   1. Take a few minutes to support a young person’s dream. Find a youth in your circle of family and friends and talk with them about what they want to do. Empower and believe in them.

                   
                   

                    

                   2. Create a holiday to celebrate someone you love. Brad created a “Mia Appreciation Day” for his wife. Your appreciation day can be as simple as declaring the date of the holiday and writing a note.

                   
                   

                    

                   3. Put paper hearts or smiley faces in a box. On each cutout write something that is special about your lover or a good friend. Give her the box and tell her to pull out a heart or smiley face anytime she gets lonely or wants a pick me up.

                   
                   

                    

                   4. Find opportunities to give compliments. It costs nothing, takes no time, and could make someone’s entire day. Don’t just think it. Say it. Today at work an older gentleman walked up to me and said, “I’m too old to be hitting on you, but you look great today. I love that sweater.” What an unexpected and appreciated comment that was for me.

                   
                   

                    

                   5. Share overheard compliments. The other day someone told me how impressed they were with one of my sons. I shared this compliment with him when I got home.

                   
                   

                    

                   6. Start a habit of writing a short note of appreciation every morning when you open your in-box. Send it before you get started on your day.

                   
                   

                    

                   7. I make-up zip-lock baggies of snacks to give to homeless people if I run across them during my time downtown.

                   
                   

                    

                   8. Make a phone call to someone you need to Love Bomb and just tell them how much you love them. You’d be surprised how fabulous this goes over.

                   
                   

                    

                   9. One day I had a library fine and when I ran out to my car to get my wallet someone paid it for me. It was all very secret.

                   
                   

                    

                   10. Really listen. Not Talk. Just listen.

                   
                   

                    

                   11. Pick up a thoughtful, but small gift for someone you see daily, but for whom this action would be an unexpected treat. Just a favorite candy bar or some small item that reminds you of them, like their favorite drink.

                   
                   

                    

                   12. Forgive a debt of someone who owes you. Maybe you paid for Jenny’s lunch and she’s promised to pay you back. When she tries just let her know if was a gift.

                   
                   

                    

                   Once you get started on this wonderful game it can get exciting. Often when you do an act of kindness to someone, they are inspired to pay it forward. What is your kindness creating in the world? It’s exciting to think about because you can’t know the specifics. It’s wonderful to imagine the affect one act can set into motion, the stone thrown in the pond, the domino tipped into the domino line, but you can’t really know what story you are writing. What you can know is that you are becoming a person who lives with more kindness, a person who creates kindness, a person who might just touch a lonely soul that was feeling desperately disconnected in a culture where far too many of us are lonely.

                   One day as I paid for the man’s dinner behind me in the Taco Bell drive-thru (a Chalupa is my one fast food indulgence) I realized that the attendant to whom I gave the money could just pocket it and no one would know the difference. When I brought this up with my coach, with whom I was reporting my RAKs to, she said, even if the attendant pocketed the money, you put the intent into the world to create a kindness – you affected the attendant, you put kindness into action. It doesn’t have to turn out the way you plan, but your intent, your energy, your giving has gone out into the world. This made me feel a little better about the idea that I couldn’t control all aspects of the game. In fact, it added a whole dimension to the idea that we cannot know what events a RAK puts into motion.

                   Kindness as a way of being. A mysterious game of fun and giving. One small effort to combat the age of loneliness. However you look at unplanned, or random, or planned and completely unrandom acts of kindness, there’s not really a downside. It’s like writing a mystery novel and you will never know all the details of the story, but you will be the force for good.

                   This week’s challenge, yup, you guessed it, try to find an act of kindness every day this week and see if you can’t start a new habit! Log in to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and share with us what you did and what stories you created in the process. We’d love to hear about it. Have fun creating your stories and we’ll see you next Wednesday on the next episode of the Love Your Story podcast.

                    

                    

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1456Wed, 07 Dec 2016 09:00:28 -070017:47falsefullI remember the first time I heard about RAK as a thing. It was in the 80’s and someone had gone around putting quarters in parking meters so folks wouldn’t get parking tickets. “What a great idea,” I thought. “So simple, so fun, and it has a really big WOW factor.” I’d never heard of any such thing. It was an ah-ha moment. I’ve grown to really like RAK’s because it’s become a bit of a game where the results are unknown. I pay for the guy behind me in the drive-thru – I have no idea how it will affect him. But I can bet, at the very least, he’s going to feel a little warm and fuzzy, and that’s going to translate into better thoughts and actions on his part.Lori LeeEpisode 011 River Touchstones: Running the San Juan RiverRiver Touchstones – A story from the San Juan River

                   Heraclitus said, “You cannot step into the same river twice.” Today’s story takes this very literally.

                   One thing I do not realize the first time I head for the river is that the person who steps onto the raft will not be the same person who steps off.  The water washes not only grains of sand from the belly of the rock; it washes from me my routine, takes me to a momentary place, a liminal space, where so many things cease to matter.  The consequences of the step onto the river are as opaque as the red silt water.  It is a time and space where, like the rock, I am carved… we are carved, yet added upon one grain at a time.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Last week we shared stories of serendipity and miracles. This week I’ll share an award-winning story about how we collect the touchstones of meaning in our life travels, and why those lovely, meaningful stones matter.

                   A warm breeze hums through the screens along the top of the palapa-style hut. Grass walls swing like skirts as I stroll in, unintentionally late, my Chacos picking their way across the dirt floor scattered with peanut shells. My navy sarong wisps around my tan legs, natural air conditioning in the hot, dry desert air, and the pre-trip dinner fills with the chatter of strangers. “Where are you from?” “What do you do?” “What brings you to the San Juan?” “Have you been here before?” I see him then. But at the time it means nothing. He means nothing. Instead, I glance at the lady wearing the red and blue Hawaiian shirt with naked surfers on it, and the two older gals with funny sun hats and drooping skin at the first table. A pudgy rocket scientist from Colorado and a newspaper owner and his wife chatter as their verbal exchange disappears on the San Juan breeze. I am the journalist-on-the-job and I plop down by an artist from New York and him, the writer for the New York Times at the corner table. We introduce ourselves and make pointless chatter about the wonderful week ahead. We have no idea the difference seven days will make.  In our mid-thirties, we claim the title of “youngest in the group”.  It’s the night before we launch. The energies and gestures, some indifferent, some intense, have started to intermingle between everyone; the beginning of our metamorphosis from single to collective.

                   Tonight we will sleep in our B&B’s, our motels and lodges; tomorrow we will pile, one on top of another, into cargo vans, our torpedo-like gray dry-bags filled with too few clothes and a shortage of sunscreen.  Tomorrow we will begin to share more than we ever intended–the river requires intimacy.  You cannot live for seven days in the wild without in some part, meshing with those you bathe, barf, sweat and eat with.  There are not many circumstances in which you find yourself peeing in public with recently acquired acquaintances, but river running is one of them.

                   It’s only been a few months since I took my children, divided nine years of belongings and left my husband to try and find the happiness I was certain I deserved. Loneliness is a multi-sided space. There is the loneliness when one simply wants companionship; there is the terrible loneliness one can have despite being with another person; and then there is the compound loneliness of being untouched, unappreciated, unconnected. This is the loneliness I carry on my back as I step onto the river.

                   At 6:00 a.m. we struggle to push the rafts from the shore, the sun filling the desert...]]>River Touchstones – A story from the San Juan River

                   Heraclitus said, “You cannot step into the same river twice.” Today’s story takes this very literally.

                   One thing I do not realize the first time I head for the river is that the person who steps onto the raft will not be the same person who steps off.  The water washes not only grains of sand from the belly of the rock; it washes from me my routine, takes me to a momentary place, a liminal space, where so many things cease to matter.  The consequences of the step onto the river are as opaque as the red silt water.  It is a time and space where, like the rock, I am carved… we are carved, yet added upon one grain at a time.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Last week we shared stories of serendipity and miracles. This week I’ll share an award-winning story about how we collect the touchstones of meaning in our life travels, and why those lovely, meaningful stones matter.

                   A warm breeze hums through the screens along the top of the palapa-style hut. Grass walls swing like skirts as I stroll in, unintentionally late, my Chacos picking their way across the dirt floor scattered with peanut shells. My navy sarong wisps around my tan legs, natural air conditioning in the hot, dry desert air, and the pre-trip dinner fills with the chatter of strangers. “Where are you from?” “What do you do?” “What brings you to the San Juan?” “Have you been here before?” I see him then. But at the time it means nothing. He means nothing. Instead, I glance at the lady wearing the red and blue Hawaiian shirt with naked surfers on it, and the two older gals with funny sun hats and drooping skin at the first table. A pudgy rocket scientist from Colorado and a newspaper owner and his wife chatter as their verbal exchange disappears on the San Juan breeze. I am the journalist-on-the-job and I plop down by an artist from New York and him, the writer for the New York Times at the corner table. We introduce ourselves and make pointless chatter about the wonderful week ahead. We have no idea the difference seven days will make.  In our mid-thirties, we claim the title of “youngest in the group”.  It’s the night before we launch. The energies and gestures, some indifferent, some intense, have started to intermingle between everyone; the beginning of our metamorphosis from single to collective.

                   Tonight we will sleep in our B&B’s, our motels and lodges; tomorrow we will pile, one on top of another, into cargo vans, our torpedo-like gray dry-bags filled with too few clothes and a shortage of sunscreen.  Tomorrow we will begin to share more than we ever intended–the river requires intimacy.  You cannot live for seven days in the wild without in some part, meshing with those you bathe, barf, sweat and eat with.  There are not many circumstances in which you find yourself peeing in public with recently acquired acquaintances, but river running is one of them.

                   It’s only been a few months since I took my children, divided nine years of belongings and left my husband to try and find the happiness I was certain I deserved. Loneliness is a multi-sided space. There is the loneliness when one simply wants companionship; there is the terrible loneliness one can have despite being with another person; and then there is the compound loneliness of being untouched, unappreciated, unconnected. This is the loneliness I carry on my back as I step onto the river.

                   At 6:00 a.m. we struggle to push the rafts from the shore, the sun filling the desert with color and warmth, the blue bulk of the rafts scraping the sand, the trailer, our legs and hands. The water laps at us, pulls us in, and we find our place in the sun. Eyes locked downstream, we scan the silt-laden waters of a prehistoric desert river that has held its course for a thousand lifetimes and watched 12,000 years of human use and occupation.  When John Wesley Powell passed the mouth of the San Juan River in 1869, he barely acknowledged it.  Powell and his crew of archaeologists and geologists spent the next decade exploring and mapping the last blank spot on the United States map –the Colorado Plateau.  Like others before and after, Powell could see no practical use for the river, and so the San Juan stayed a terra incognita, difficult to access and even more difficult to harness.  Our first days and nights on the river reveal snatches of history, give the tiniest peek, just enough for us to wonder at those brave and hardy pioneers who made their lives at its sandy flanks.  It is along these sandy flanks that I begin to pick up stones.

                   Our first day we raft to Riverhouse. River House claims status as the most extensive Ancestral Puebloan dwelling on the San Juan between Bluff and Clay Hills Crossing.  With 14 storage and living rooms, a kiva and petroglyphs along the upper reaches of the alcove, this dwelling has given up secrets and clues to an ancient people we will never know.  The 1,500 dried corncobs, hundreds of potshards, a sandal and fragments of cloth and yucca date the site at 700 A.D. – 1300 A.D.  Hiking west we climb Comb Ridge, a 700-foot wall over which the Mormon pioneers struggled to pull their wagons.  The effort was so extensive oxen died in the yoke and stumbling horses left blood on the rocks.  Our efforts require nothing more than sipping our Gatorade® and at the top we peer across the vast muddy swath washing through the desert; burnt rocks lined in millennia with chocolate browns, frosted oranges, burnt sienna and buff.  James, the journalist with the New York Times, banters with me as we hike. He and his brother-in-law are out for their annual trek to a Utah river and I think little of his attention. It’s no more than I would have exchanged with anyone else…but quietly, in my own mind, I am enjoying his verbal sparring, his company.

                   As night falls we wrestle our tents, despite the wind, flapping and colorful onto the sands below River House. Here I learn that sand does not hold tent stakes, and only large stones–inside my tent–will keep me grounded.  The cooks make the futile attempt at using their suntanned hands as sand shields over strips of sirloin sizzling and popping for fajitas, while the monochromatic browns surround us: the water, the sand, the cliffs in their patina and lichen clothing.  Before I learn of stones, my tent lifts into the air, a green kite on the wind, my river mates catch and secure it for me. George and Nancy, my tent neighbors, go about my business while I sit unknowingly, by the coursings of the muddy river in my Therma-rest ground chair watching the river flow with a quiet, but startling power. These two have known me only hours, but my tent now sits staked—7-mm rope and river rocks.  When I find out what they have done, how they saved my only shelter, I am touched.  We have floated only one day together. I put this small touchstone, rubbed smooth by the river, in my pocket to remember their kindness.

                   The first night is the last night I sleep in my tent.  Too much sun. Not enough water.   Day two surrounds me like a gorgeous blister: chocolate desert water, the friction of my swimsuit clad body perched unprotected on the baby blue tube of the raft, forgetting the sun holds the power of gods. I spend my second night curled next to the coolness of the river my head a throbbing mass I’d like to tear off and send downstream.  I don’t go to my tent, the stuffiness a prison, but more importantly, it is too far from the river and I need quick access as I repeatedly hurl into the sienna current as the night passes. I lie still, curled in fetal position on my sleeping pad. Late, dark, but desert warm with a solid black sky of screaming stars. I expect nothing from anyone. It’s my own fault I wasn’t more careful—I know better—and the flat desert night spins around my head, around my body.  And it is here, in this scene that James comes, sits next to me, brings his sleeping pad out and lies by my side.  He tethers me, keeps me from spinning away.

                   “I’m sorry,” I grumble. “You don’t have to stay here.” I’m embarrassed.  I hardly know him. He keeps his hand on my back all night, does not leave me to the loneliness of being sick with no one by my side.  I think I shall love him forever simply for that comforting hand.  My first year at college I found myself kneeling on the floor over a cold apartment toilet, the first time I’d been sick without my mother to bring me water or soda and brush the hair from my face.  I cried, not because of the wretchedness of being ill, but because of the realization of the solitary aspect of growing up–the pang so stark I remember it 13 years later.  James becomes a touchstone.  At critical times what seems small to the giver makes all the difference to the one who receives.  That night something invisible happened. His hand on my back, his body sleeping by my side through the darkness and heat of the desert night, the kindness. It wasn’t a gift, it was a tie–invisible, unspoken, and from that night on I always knew where James sat, walked or swam, and I could feel him watching me in the same way.

                   Heat stroke sends me to the river’s edge, lays me out under the stars, shows me how it feels to sleep under a black sky of delirious, glowing orbs unfettered by human light, unblocked by tent mesh, but James showed me connection. Of all the stones I collected, these touchstone of the freedom of the dark desert night without filters; and the kindness of strangers, are always ones I return to.

                   In the morning when I groggily force my eyes open, I find we have slept beneath a towering red-rock structure that resembles a man’s face so completely no one has to point it out or describe it.  It is simply there, across the river, looking down, a guardian.  Guardians surrounded me. And so now does James.

                   In 1965, in Down the Colorado, Robert Brewster Stanton wrote, “The red is not in itself brilliant, but the effect of the morning and evening sun shining upon the cliffs through the peculiar atmosphere of that dry country, produces a most startling effect, till the whole side of the Canyon seems ablaze with scarlet flame.”  Rafting the 83 mile stretch of meandering river from Sand Island  to Clay Hills takeout, takes us through a history from which we lie so far removed it is hard to fathom the eons that have passed in forming the faces and layers revealed.  Shortly after the initial launch, the river runs by Navajo sandstone walls lined with thick black streaks of desert varnish where minerals from the dirt atop the cliff have bled down the face year after year after year. The cliffs have the look and name of “Tiger Walls.”  We pass through the Honaker Trail formation dated 290 million years old, we pass through the Triassic, Jurassic and Pennsylvanian eras.  And yet the San Juan is famous for the Goosenecks, a tight twisting path the river has cut into the rock where it takes eight river miles to cover one mile of land.  A prime example of an entrenched meander.  When taking the path of least resistance the route is seldom direct.  James and I become an entrenched meander. We talk on the back of the raft mile after mile. His vocabulary astounds me. I want to have him just for the words he knows.  I’m kind of ashamed to call myself a writer next to him. Shit, I need a dictionary to keep up, but it’s gorgeous on the ears. The river cannot claim independence of the larger landscape surrounding it; it has evolved as a consequence of the land.  We are the same.

                   The sun catches up with me despite wet draped towels across my shoulders and a wide brim hat. My skin screams in vibrant red and yet tomorrow is more sun that I can’t avoid. Nurse Lynn takes me to her tent and pulls out a bottle of soothing after-sun burn relief. I can’t remember the brand, but when she sent me out with the bottle in hand and told me I could keep it, again I was surprised at another personal kindness. The lotion smelled tropic and clean and I slathered it on, day after day, cooling my skin and blessing nurse Lynn. I picked up another stone, this one speckled, and added it to my pocket.

                   The river guides have two inflatable kayaks referred to as Duckies.  Each day we choose to either ride the big blue rafts while a guide rows, or to row ourselves in these bright yellow banana boats.  Near the beginning of the trip Joan and Jean, the two older women, carefully scoot their bodies into position in the Ducky. Joan, in back, her face lost in her lifejacket, becomes nothing but a hat, a life vest and two arms.  Jean, in front, seems less secure with this idea, though the two have rowed together off and on over a forty-year friendship.  Each day they choose the Ducky.  They have discovered their place on this trip like I have discovered my place under the stars.  Their second day we notice the Ducky rocking.  Jay guides our boat toward them. “I was just trying to hang over the side to pee,” responds Joan matter-of-factly with a bit of a sheepish grin. “Courageous,” says Jay, “but your technique requires refinement.”

                   On the last day, when Duckies are being divvied, Joan adamantly stakes her claim.  “We are going to die sooner than the rest of you,” she says, “so you will all have another time to row a Ducky.  We are not getting out!”  I thought of offering to wrestle her for it, but am afraid I might lose. They do their thing. We do ours.

                   The days and the nights pass and the older crowd says “the younger generation just likes to spend time together,” but I know this is how they let us save face, how they justify his attention to me when the sun glints off his wedding ring. Fun, gentle, intelligent and the tension between us is a tightly woven spring.  It’s day five of seven and the guides paddle the bulging blue rafts toward a sandy beach take-out. As the rafts slide ashore, rubber grinding sand, everyone scatters like candy tossed at a parade, finding space from each other, putting up our tent city; but somehow James and I gravitate like magnets to a desert waterfall just south of camp. It is hot and wet and we rinse the grit from our hair and feet, the water splashing from us in joyous hops, reflecting in the sunlight. I languish in the pool beneath the falls, water splashing off my upturned face, and he slowly sits down next to me. “Are we going to do this?” he whispers, as he looks me straight in the eyes, water running down his cheek, the air alive with tension, with the unknown, with the hopes of the body. In one sentence James, with his words, transforms what is visceral, unspoken attraction into something concrete. Into a stone.  I look back, into his blue eyes, needing him the way the desert needs this waterfall, and say, “No. I won’t do that to you…or your wife.” The words are a stone in my throat, I swallow hard. It has become real. It has become words. And I have let go of the tether I so badly wanted to hold on to.

                   At week’s end when the rafts slide into Clay Hills landing, one tan leg, then the other slides over the hard, bloated muscle of the raft.  Our feet touch a concrete ground that leads us away from the river.  Only then does leaving become real.  Only then do we realize we will never step into the same river twice. Only then does the liminal space disappear and the reality of leaving him, the river – wide and fast, dark and powerful, hit me hard in the stomach and the panic rises.

                   Washing the red desert silt from our clothes cannot be done; washing it from the soul proves equally difficult. This is the way water carves. The way of creation. I have filled my pockets with worn river touchstones, and as I reluctantly step from the river to the cement launch pad, I dig my hand into my pocket to make sure I haven’t lost them.  I want to turn around, get back on the river, but I know it is gone. The river we stepped into has swept past us.

                   This week’s challenge is to think about your touchstones – the moments in your life, the stories, that have been meaningful, rich with moments of learning or insight, people who have grounded and blessed you. I suggest you write them down. Start a touchstone story journal, because when you don’t write them down, sometimes you put your hand in your pocket to make sure you haven’t lost them…..and they are no longer there.

                   Until next week – have fun telling your stories. See you next Wednesday same time, same place, and pass on the link to this podcast to one of your friends!

                    

                    

                    

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1404Wed, 30 Nov 2016 18:01:34 -070021:01falsefullHeraclitus said, “You cannot step into the same river twice.” Today’s story takes this very literally.<br /> <br /> One thing I do not realize the first time I head for the river is that the person who steps onto the raft will not be the same person who steps off. The water washes not only grains of sand from the belly of the rock; it washes from me my routine, takes me to a momentary place, a liminal space, where so many things cease to matter. The consequences of the step onto the river are as opaque as the red silt water. It is a time and space where, like the rock, I am carved… we are carved, yet added upon one grain at a time.Lori LeeEpisode 010 Allow for Miracles and SerendipityAllow for Miracles – Serendipity Stories

                   Miracle comes from the Latin word miraculum (mirroraculoom), meaning to wonder or marvel. I believe in miracles. Today I’ve got some stories to tell you…yes, stories about unlikely happenings happening.

                   In the mornings I say an abundance prayer. I learned it from my friend Tony and it goes something like this: “Thank you for the joyful abundance in my life and in the life of my family and friends. Thank you for the abundance that will come into my life today. And thank you for the abundance that I can bring to others today.” Every time I say the part about “thank you for the abundance that will come into our lives today,” I get excited. I’m like a kid waiting for his birthday, waiting to see what abundance and wonderful things will show up as the day progresses. It’s an exciting way to live – always waiting for the next generous miracle to show up.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Last week was our second leadership episode where we talked about how to use the archetypes of the hero’s journey as a strategy tool for getting your team headed onto their next adventure of accomplishment. This week I’m going to share some stories, that as far as I’m concerned, show us that the universe has our back.

                   You’ve heard the word Serendipity? The word comes from the Persian fairy tale The Three Princes of Serendip. It is the phenomenon of finding valuable or agreeable things not sought for. In the story the three princes regularly discovered pleasant things that they weren’t searching for. I once had an acquaintance suggest that another way to think of serendipity is that it is the phenomenon of finding valuable or agreeable things in a way not before envisioned. In other words, things work out as they should, but more often than not, not as you thought they would. There is a space of allowing there.

                   Miracles go beyond serendipity. We often beg for miracles, search for miracles, or manifest miracles by our faith. Christ said before he did any miracle, “Be it unto you according to your faith.” I find that fascinating. So, according to this, I might draw the conclusion that first one must believe before miracles occur. Do you believe God can do miracles? Do you believe you can create miracles because you believe strongly in a course of action? That belief in God, in ourselves, in the power of Universal law and power being willing to bend for our good, despite  our current limited understanding, seems to be crucial toward the manifestation of the miracle. But often, with things of a serendipitous nature, it simply appears that the Universe is looking out for us with little thought from ourselves.

                   In 2004 I started a project collecting serendipity stories. Everyone has them if they pay attention, but there are many who do NOT pay attention. I figured if I collected serendipity stories, and shared them, that we would all become more aware of how there are forces in the universe, angels, God,  that truly have our back. These moments of magic are not distributed according to religion or region, color or culture, gender or gentry. They are across-the-board human experiences and they are crazy cool.

                   I want to share a few because I believe in miracles and I believe in serendipity, and I still believe that if we share these stories we will all become more aware of the wonderful miracles that go on around all of us every day. And, if we start realizing how many magical coincidences, serendipitous experiences, and downright miracles are...]]>Allow for Miracles – Serendipity Stories

                   Miracle comes from the Latin word miraculum (mirroraculoom), meaning to wonder or marvel. I believe in miracles. Today I’ve got some stories to tell you…yes, stories about unlikely happenings happening.

                   In the mornings I say an abundance prayer. I learned it from my friend Tony and it goes something like this: “Thank you for the joyful abundance in my life and in the life of my family and friends. Thank you for the abundance that will come into my life today. And thank you for the abundance that I can bring to others today.” Every time I say the part about “thank you for the abundance that will come into our lives today,” I get excited. I’m like a kid waiting for his birthday, waiting to see what abundance and wonderful things will show up as the day progresses. It’s an exciting way to live – always waiting for the next generous miracle to show up.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Last week was our second leadership episode where we talked about how to use the archetypes of the hero’s journey as a strategy tool for getting your team headed onto their next adventure of accomplishment. This week I’m going to share some stories, that as far as I’m concerned, show us that the universe has our back.

                   You’ve heard the word Serendipity? The word comes from the Persian fairy tale The Three Princes of Serendip. It is the phenomenon of finding valuable or agreeable things not sought for. In the story the three princes regularly discovered pleasant things that they weren’t searching for. I once had an acquaintance suggest that another way to think of serendipity is that it is the phenomenon of finding valuable or agreeable things in a way not before envisioned. In other words, things work out as they should, but more often than not, not as you thought they would. There is a space of allowing there.

                   Miracles go beyond serendipity. We often beg for miracles, search for miracles, or manifest miracles by our faith. Christ said before he did any miracle, “Be it unto you according to your faith.” I find that fascinating. So, according to this, I might draw the conclusion that first one must believe before miracles occur. Do you believe God can do miracles? Do you believe you can create miracles because you believe strongly in a course of action? That belief in God, in ourselves, in the power of Universal law and power being willing to bend for our good, despite  our current limited understanding, seems to be crucial toward the manifestation of the miracle. But often, with things of a serendipitous nature, it simply appears that the Universe is looking out for us with little thought from ourselves.

                   In 2004 I started a project collecting serendipity stories. Everyone has them if they pay attention, but there are many who do NOT pay attention. I figured if I collected serendipity stories, and shared them, that we would all become more aware of how there are forces in the universe, angels, God,  that truly have our back. These moments of magic are not distributed according to religion or region, color or culture, gender or gentry. They are across-the-board human experiences and they are crazy cool.

                   I want to share a few because I believe in miracles and I believe in serendipity, and I still believe that if we share these stories we will all become more aware of the wonderful miracles that go on around all of us every day. And, if we start realizing how many magical coincidences, serendipitous experiences, and downright miracles are constantly around us, we are bound to have hope, to feel less alone, and know that someone/some force has our back.

                   As I share these stories I’ll use their initials instead of their names.

                   M.B. from Golden Colorado was debating about whether or not to get Lasik surgery on her eyes. She was pretty much blind without glasses and had started having problems with her contacts. Leading an active lifestyle had become more difficult, but there was a giant problem to having the issue fixed. To even consider someone touching her eye was enough to make her sick. She had an inexplicable fear of her eyes being touched and when people would suggest she get Lasik she would seize up with panic. At the time Lasik cost $5000, and this was a sum she did not have, so she came up with a grand solution. When others recommended it she said, “if $5000 fell out of the sky, I’d do it in a minute, but I just can’t afford it.” This kept the well-wishers at bay and MB in her comfort zone, but it certainly didn’t solve the problem with her eyes. A few weeks of using this splendid excuse passed by, and soon she had herself believing that if she got $5000 she would surely jump right into Lasik. Well, a few weeks later her 94-year-old grandmother passed away. When the will was read she had left her $5000 with the instructions to spend it in a way that would always remind MB of her grandmother. “I can’t think of a better way to remember my grandmother,” she said to me, “than to wake up every morning with 20/20 vision. Every morning when I wake up, I think of her.” Her grandmother had never heard her excuse of not having the money for Lasik. But her angels had her back.

                   L.H. lost her watch. She kept thinking about getting another one, but she put it off and put it off. For months she was watchless, but it never seemed like the right time and it just became something that needed to be done. One day she and her friends were hiking in the eastern Sierras. They struggled up a 2000 foot climb, and tired and hungry they found a spot to pitch their tens near a chain of high mountain lakes. It was a difficult approach and the area was not highly used. The second night in camp, after a nice dinner and tantalizing scattering of ghost stories, LH put on her headlamp and headed out into the woods for a bathroom break. As she rounded a bend her headlamp caught a glimmer that startled her, especially after the ghost stories. She started to turn and head back to the campfire, but instead thought better of it and braved the unknown, turning back to the large boulder. Perched on top she found a beautiful watch sitting there, unharmed by the elements. She looked at it in wonder, picked it up, and of course at the trailhead the next morning she looked for any postings put up for a lost watch. Nothing had been posted. “This treasure was meant to be on my wrist,” she told me. There was a reason she hadn’t felt urgency in replacing her watch. I say this, because many a time I have pushed forward getting things done that “needed to be done” only to find later that if I had gone with the flow that I had felt, instead of surrendering to the pressure of the checklist, things would have worked out better, and as they needed to.

                   C.L. from Salt Lake City, Utah was starting her own fishing skirt company. She and her husband were bonefishing at Boca Paila in the Yucatan in Mexico, the place where the inspiration for the Macabi skirt was actually received. The idea for her skirt had been conceived on her first trip here, and back for her second trip, she had brought 3 or 4 prototypes. She asked her friends to use them and give her feedback, and after a day of fishing one woman returned and enthusiastically explained that a good friend of theirs, a photographer, would be flying in the next day. She felt he might be persuaded to take some photos of the new product. While everyone else, CL included, was planning to leave early the next morning, there was little hope this fabulous idea would come together. As it turned out, the photographer got in early, CL and her friends got out late, and this professional photographer was willing and able to bless CL with what became some of her favorite product photos. “I was just amazed at my good fortune,” she said.

                   J.A. was an accomplished ocean swimmer. For a time he was a lifeguard on Maui and he had experienced many types of eddies, currents and mild riptides. Often he used them to his advantage, where he let them pull him in the direction he needed to go. One beautiful, sunny day J.A. found himself on one of his favorite beaches in Kauai, but he found himself in an unusual situation. He was stuck in the water. No matter which direction he swam, he couldn’t get out. The water wasn’t pulling him out very quickly, but even with the aid of flippers he was unable to break free of the water’s control. Wearing his snorkel gear, he wasn’t panicked, but certainly uneasy and a fit frightened. “I can remember how loud it seemed as I was breathing through the snorkel. It amplified every breath. Then I noticed movement in the water below me,” he said. “My curiosity caused me to forget my current circumstance for the moment, and as it moved toward me I felt confused. It looked like a rock or a piece of the reef floating toward me. Then I could see it clearly. A very large sea turtle with a chipped beak. I had seen turtles before, but never this close, and it was amazing. I had completely forgotten about my predicament and instead only wanted to touch the turtle. He came up to me, less than a foot away. I dove down the extra foot to meet this beautiful creature. I grabbed onto both sides of his shell.”  Well, this is when the next adventure began. J.A. said, “I had seen turtles move gracefully through the water, but I had no idea how powerful they were under the water. He took off very fast, with me holding on. My snorkel gear peeled from my face and I road for a period of time until I needed to resurface to breathe. I let go and the turtle surfaced as well and looked back at me. Perfect eye contact, almost communication, and then, was gone. It was amazing! It wasn’t until he was gone that I realized I was some distance closer to the beach and no longer in the dangerous waters.”  He swam safely to the beach. It was one of the most sacred experiences of his life.

                   There are more of these, lots more, your mom, your sister, your brother, your neighbor….they all have them.

                   One time a girl told me how she had run out of money and had to live in a trailer. She found $5000 that had been hidden in the stove at some point by an unknown party.

                   Another gal was trying to save money to go to Porto Rico but was falling terribly short of what she needed, until she realized that she had a certain type of mushrooms on her land that had begun to grow abundantly. She found she could sell them, and came up with  just the right amount of money she needed for her trip.

                   After I got my contract for my first book, Wild Weekends in Utah, a multisport adventure guidebook, I was preparing to head out on months of weekend adventures. To be honest, I knew my way around many places, but not all of the wonderful Southern Utah canyons that were to be a big part of these adventures were familiar to me. I was willing to head out and figure out the lay of the land, but I also didn’t know what I didn’t know. There were a number of incredible adventures that were completely off my radar. I found this out when serendipitously I met Spence. Spence was an experienced Canyonlands adventurer, and he’d worked as an editor. Just when I needed him, he showed up. Together, we embarked on canoe trips, backpack trips, and canyoneering trips that he introduced me to. His advice and companionship, editing and ideas were exactly what I needed, exactly when I needed it. He was a miracle that showed up to play this crucial role, and then he moved out of my life. But his presence made the book significantly stronger.

                   Other stories are told of events and circumstances aligning so someone ended up in their dream home, or getting their dream job. Sometimes the miracles are big, sometimes the coincidences are small, but isn’t it fascinating that so often we are blessed with just the thing we need, right when we need it?

                   Of course, this doesn’t always happen. Sometimes the things we want most we don’t get at all, which just makes the unpredictability of the magic even more entertaining. What will show up today?

                   Martha Beck, the revered life coach and columnist for Oprah magazine, talks about something similar in her book Steering by Starlight. In her comments on how things unfold when people get started on the right path to living their best life – fulfilling their destiny, she says, “Circumstances beyond your control will begin aligning as if to facilitate your actions. I’ve see this so often it should no longer surprise me, but it always does. I have no explanation for the magical things I’ve seen happening as my clients begin making maps of their future lives.”

                   Do you remember in episode 7 when I talked about the events that come together to propel me into the long-time dream of getting my master’s degree. There is no question in my mind that it would have been nearly impossible for me to wrap my mind around making that happen had my friend Sandy not come into my life and showed me how to do it. Our paths and approaches are different, but had she not showed up in the way that she did, with the information that she did, I would never have stepped on that path at the time I did. I look at it as a miracle; as if I were being guided down a path that was desired, but also meant to be. In hindsight, I can clearly see how my masters work on the personal narrative was key to all this work I’m doing with story. It was the foundation, and in a way a legitimizer for me, to do what I’m doing now. That is pretty amazing and it makes me feel like I’m on the right path. And, that is the reason why noticing the miracles and talking about the serendipity is good for the soul. Dog on it – suddenly we feel like there are forces supporting us, that we’re not just here to make it happen or die trying, we aren’t alone.

                   When I was in the process of creating this podcast, I was starting from scratch. I had no idea what type of equipment I needed, I had no idea how to edit, how to launch, how to record. A series of declarations had led me to the path, and I was ready to walk it, but I had been working long, long hours for a couple months and was hitting my head against a thick, heavy brick wall when it came to the technical side of the production. One day the thought crossed my mind that I needed a partner. The idea was actually a pretty good one, but where was I going to find the right person who would get my dream and be as invested in making this happen – someone that I would trust enough to let them in on the project. I dismissed it, but on a coaching call the next week I ended up telling my coach about the idea. “I can hear it in your voice,” she said. “It’s going to happen. Declare it!” By the time I got off the phone I was excited about the idea. I declared it and to be honest, had NO idea or expectation that it would really come to pass. It took only one week. I was walking my dog and my neighbors were walking their kids to school. We passed on the sidewalk and I stopped to talk to these dear friends who I see only occasionally. Matt started telling me about the project he was working on called Story Trek, where he travels all over the country as the camera man for a TV show recording people’s stories in random towns across the U.S. “We have to talk,” I said, not sure how our paths were going to cross, but figuring he’d have some fun and interesting information about what he was doing. The idea of him being my partner was way in the back of my head, but when we eventually met up the following week it unfolded in minutes, as if it was meant to be. I said, “I don’t know what this is going to look like, maybe I’ll hire you to do videos, or,” I threw in, “I’ve been looking for a partner…” as I said it everything seemed to align.  His wife looked up and said, “I’ve been saying he should partner with you.” I looked at him and he shook his head in the affirmative. And, just like that we were on the same path. This was far more than serendipity, this was a miracle; an answer to prayers; even a sign I am on the right path, because I hadn’t believed I would find him…he was a gift.

                   Wayne Dyer was a huge promoter of manifesting miracles. In his book Wishes Fulfilled, he says, “I’ve seen firsthand how virtually every wish or desire I’ve placed my attention on has transformed from a mental thought into an objective fact.” Dr. Dyer was a manifesting genius and spent his life speaking, writing, and living the art of manifesting, of creating miracles by his belief in himself and his ability to use the god within him to literally create what he wanted. His life is a prime example of his teachings – he grew up as an orphan and at a young age deciding he wanted to guide others. He  manifested a life even beyond his imaginings, and he guided and taught so many, many others in this way of belief, manifestation, and creation.

                   We can create miracles – we come from a universe that is based in abundance. If it were not, life would not regenerate as it does on all levels. We were created by a creator, and thus we are the children of a creator, that means we are also creators. What if one of the big things we are here to learn in this life is how to use those powers? The power of belief is key to any act of creation. If you didn’t believe that putting ingredients in a bowl, mixing them and baking them would create a cake, you would never embark on the mission to bake a cake in the first place. Belief is first, then action.

                   In the case of Serendipity, I believe those moments are just gifts. A kiss from God, a slight nudge in the right direction, or just a tiny hug to let you know you are not alone in the Universe.

                   So, here’s a question for you – to what do you attribute serendipity? Go to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and go to the ‘contact us’ page and tell us your thoughts. While you’re at it, if you have a story of miracles or serendipity, will you share with me? Your assignment for the week is to watch for your daily miracles and feel the arms of love around you. Start to pay attention to the universal support, to God at your back, to just the right thing, at just the right time.

                   Have a great time telling your stories this week, and if you know someone who would enjoy this podcast, please pass it on! We’ll see you next Wednesday for the next episode of Love Your Story podcast.

                    

                    

                    

                    

                    

                    

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1400Wed, 23 Nov 2016 17:39:28 -070021:07falsefullYou’ve heard the word Serendipity? The word comes from the Persian fairy tale The Three Princes of Serendip. It is the phenomenon of finding valuable or agreeable things not sought for. In the story the three princes regularly discovered pleasant things that they weren’t searching for. Miracles go beyond serendipity. We often beg for miracles, search for miracles, or manifest miracles by our faith. Today's podcast is about sharing some of those stories and remembering we are surrounded by magic and love.Lori LeeEpisode 009 BUSINESS – The Hero’s Journey Storyline: A strategy tool for leadersTeam leaders, life coaches, team coaches, parents, teachers, strategy planners, anyone who needs to get people on the same page working toward the completion of a project – today’s podcast is especially for you. Episode 003 was our first episode for leaders, teaching you how to use story as a tool for defining origin, values, and vision. This is our second episode, especially for leaders. Stay tuned for a breakdown of the archetypes within the Heroes Journey and how you can use them to make perfect sense of where and how you need your team, family or group to move toward your final goal. In other words….leadership using the oldest and most reliable tool – story.

                   When you are a leader you know how challenging it can to lead a group of individuals toward a goal. There are different ideas, personalities, viewpoints, skills, and agendas. Not everyone has the skill to lead, but those who do, and do it effectively, know that it takes skill, judgment, patience, planning, and tools. Today I’ll open the story toolbox and put a new tool in your hot little hands.

                   Where do you need or want your team to go? Decide that first…then it needs to be communicated to your team. Along with this information you need to show them what to expect, what they will be up against, what it will take to get there, and why they want to embark on this in the first place. This is how it’s done. Get out your notepad, you’ll want to take notes.

                   Today I’m going to breakdown the hero’s journey into six parts. These six parts, when taken separately, allow you to use the archetypes within the typical hero’s journey to build an effective and exciting leadership approach for your next big undertaking. It will allow you, as the one leading others to the end of the rainbow, to help your team, group or family get excited about what’s ahead, understand the goals they are striving for, breakdown tasks and develop strategies for success, pinpoint the obstacle or dragon to be overcome, and get excited about the reward at the end of the accomplishment. Let’s jump right into these six parts and how to use them.

                   First, any good adventure starts out with an invitation. This is the Call to Adventure.

                   The Call to Adventure: In Star Wars Princess Leah sent out her invitation, or call for help, through a hologram in R2D2. In the Hobbit, Gandolf extends the invitation to Bilbo through a visit to his front door. In Harry Potter, Harry receives a written invitation from Hogwarts. In the Hunger Games, the Capital holds the reaping. The call to adventure is big, real, and those involved know an adventure is beginning. This is the place to start – a clear, bold invite onto the path of your adventure toward self-improvement, a family vacation, a service project, getting a new sales account, beating out the competition, taking state with your school team. Whatever adventure you and your team are starting out on, it starts with a call to action. Make it fun, make it clear, make it bold.

                   The second part of the hero’s journey is an explanation of The World we are In: Once you’ve invited your team members to place their feet on the rocky path of adventure, you, as the leader, must then ground your team in their starting point – the world as it is now. Talk about the current reality and what needs to change. Are the hungry in your community suffering and you want your youth group to help hand out burritos to the homeless? Has the high school across the valley held the state title for too many years? Is it far past time to change the company’s image of being environmentally insensitive? Let’s start with a look at the way things are NOW. The realities of the world we stand in today, and why that’s not okay anymore.

                   The third part of the hero’s journey is  The Hero enters the scene. Who is going to save us? We’ve discussed the problem to be solved – there’s been a call to action. We know...]]>Team leaders, life coaches, team coaches, parents, teachers, strategy planners, anyone who needs to get people on the same page working toward the completion of a project – today’s podcast is especially for you. Episode 003 was our first episode for leaders, teaching you how to use story as a tool for defining origin, values, and vision. This is our second episode, especially for leaders. Stay tuned for a breakdown of the archetypes within the Heroes Journey and how you can use them to make perfect sense of where and how you need your team, family or group to move toward your final goal. In other words….leadership using the oldest and most reliable tool – story.

                   When you are a leader you know how challenging it can to lead a group of individuals toward a goal. There are different ideas, personalities, viewpoints, skills, and agendas. Not everyone has the skill to lead, but those who do, and do it effectively, know that it takes skill, judgment, patience, planning, and tools. Today I’ll open the story toolbox and put a new tool in your hot little hands.

                   Where do you need or want your team to go? Decide that first…then it needs to be communicated to your team. Along with this information you need to show them what to expect, what they will be up against, what it will take to get there, and why they want to embark on this in the first place. This is how it’s done. Get out your notepad, you’ll want to take notes.

                   Today I’m going to breakdown the hero’s journey into six parts. These six parts, when taken separately, allow you to use the archetypes within the typical hero’s journey to build an effective and exciting leadership approach for your next big undertaking. It will allow you, as the one leading others to the end of the rainbow, to help your team, group or family get excited about what’s ahead, understand the goals they are striving for, breakdown tasks and develop strategies for success, pinpoint the obstacle or dragon to be overcome, and get excited about the reward at the end of the accomplishment. Let’s jump right into these six parts and how to use them.

                   First, any good adventure starts out with an invitation. This is the Call to Adventure.

                   The Call to Adventure: In Star Wars Princess Leah sent out her invitation, or call for help, through a hologram in R2D2. In the Hobbit, Gandolf extends the invitation to Bilbo through a visit to his front door. In Harry Potter, Harry receives a written invitation from Hogwarts. In the Hunger Games, the Capital holds the reaping. The call to adventure is big, real, and those involved know an adventure is beginning. This is the place to start – a clear, bold invite onto the path of your adventure toward self-improvement, a family vacation, a service project, getting a new sales account, beating out the competition, taking state with your school team. Whatever adventure you and your team are starting out on, it starts with a call to action. Make it fun, make it clear, make it bold.

                   The second part of the hero’s journey is an explanation of The World we are In: Once you’ve invited your team members to place their feet on the rocky path of adventure, you, as the leader, must then ground your team in their starting point – the world as it is now. Talk about the current reality and what needs to change. Are the hungry in your community suffering and you want your youth group to help hand out burritos to the homeless? Has the high school across the valley held the state title for too many years? Is it far past time to change the company’s image of being environmentally insensitive? Let’s start with a look at the way things are NOW. The realities of the world we stand in today, and why that’s not okay anymore.

                   The third part of the hero’s journey is  The Hero enters the scene. Who is going to save us? We’ve discussed the problem to be solved – there’s been a call to action. We know the state of the status quo. Who can we turn to in order to overcome this dark and dreary space? To fight the dragon? To free the archetypical maiden? To save Middle Earth? Well – you are! Your team is the hero. This is where you discuss how to extract your greatest strengths, how to stack your team for a win, how to minimize and overcome weaknesses and capitalize on your assets. This is where your team gets to feel the urgency, the power within them, the excitement of what they can do! This is where we do the chest pounding and the bragging. This is where you help them see the heroes they really are and the heroes they can be.

                   Enter The Bad Guy: What stands between your team and the better world you are after? Is it the competition? Is it old ways of thinking? Is it laziness? Is it not sharing the same vision? Is it bad habits? Is it Sauron? The Orks? The Dark Side? Voldemort? The Capital? Donald Trump? Discussing the obstacle or obstacles to be overcome is part of the process. What are we up against? Let’s say the name out loud, narrow our gaze, and find the weaknesses in the armor that we can exploit to overcome the antagonist. Without this fourth part of the hero’s journey, there’s no guarantee that everyone knows who the bad guy is, what you’re trying to overcome. Talk about what stands between you and the prize. Discuss approaches for overcoming the menace. Name the opponent loud and clear.

                   The fifth and most in-depth portion of the hero’s journey is The Journey itself: It’s a good idea to talk up front about the journey you will all take together. The expected ups and downs, the long days on the path in the hot sun, the cold nights on the mountain ledge, the joyful moments around the campfire or moments in front of the sunrise. While it’s not a good idea to preach too much gloom and doom, it is a good idea to acknowledge that journeys push you, test you, and try you. It’s okay to know there’s a good chance there may be moments of breakdown – but these can lead to breakthrough. Here’s the space to discuss plans, and the strategy you want to implement as you step out onto the trail of your adventure. This is the place where you discuss the mountains you get to prepare to cross, the battles you see yourselves stepping up to fight, and the approach you want to take in attitude and energy. “Today we will step onto the path, each with their assignment to do X, each with a new attitude and heart about Y. Our motto is Z and we will cross our first bridge next Tuesday.”

                   The last and final step in helping your team strategize is The Better World: So when you get to the top of Mount Doom and throw in the ring, then what? When the Capital has fallen who takes over leadership? What happens after the Death Star blows up? This is the better world you and your team are working for. What is the real life equivalent? Is it the new account you want to land and all the rewards and promotions that will come along with it? Is it the championship medal around your neck? Is it a closer family spending time and creating memories? Is it a dream realized? A job landed? A million dollars made? A new community event created? This is the part where you get to show, not tell the team what lies in store after the perseverance through the swamps of the journey, what they get when they break through the breakdowns. This is the carrot dangling at the end of the stick! This is where we talk about why we are headed out on this journey in the first place. This is what they will think back on during the hard times, so make it clear and exciting.

                   It’s a simple idea when it’s all broken down. Its power comes in the vision setting, the strategy, getting everyone on the same page without pulling punches! When we watch movies or read stories it’s pretty normal to put ourselves in the role of the main characters. It’s why we cry or feel melancholy when sad things happen in a story because we are automatically experiencing vicariously what the characters are going through. Getting to approach a potentially difficult project with the ideas of the hero’s journey fueling your perception of the challenge, really isn’t all that far-fetched. It may even be a shot in the arm instead of the usual boring approaches that perhaps haven’t worked so well in the past. Whether you actually tell your team how you are mimicking the hero’s journey is up to you, but following the same pattern still works, even if you don’t tell them what you’re doing.

                   Let me share an example of what this might look like in action. I’m going to have fun with this approach and play it up. Again, you can present it to your team in any way that works for you. This is just an example.

                   Today there is a real estate team meeting. It’s the end of December and time for their annual planning meeting for the coming year. Each team member strolls in, joking a little with one another, and take their seats around the table waiting for the team leader to start.

                   But it’s not the usual beginning everyone is expecting. Instead, the team leader passes a sealed envelope to each person around the table. The letter reads as follows:

                   Dear Insert Name,

                   As you know 2016 was a strong year for our team, but we came in third place in sales missing our mark by $5M in gross sales. This year, 2017, is going to be different. We need 10 additional clients this year with an average home sale price of $500,000 and we have 12 months to do it. You have been called to take this journey, as a team, into the lime-light of the top sales team in the Helter Skelter Board of Realtors. Do you accept?

                   As they finish their letters the team leader starts a video. As the video fills the screen with music, information on the current lending climate, current interest rate trends, the real estate projections for 2017 and the strengths of the buyer’s market they will be experiencing in the coming year flood the room. As the video concludes the team leader looks at each one of them. “You!” he says as his fist comes down on the table, “You are the men and women who are going to make this happen.” Music swells in the background as the video transitions into superhero music. “Our team is one of the strongest sales teams to work in this market. We have a buyer specialist (he points at Jean). We have two listing specialists (he points at Tyler and Stacy). We have our marketing specialists and Tim, who keeps us all organized and the paperwork filed. We are a fine-oiled machine. YOU are the heroes stepping out to set records and bring home awards. We provide top client service and are trained with everything we need to walk away with top sales team this time next year.

                   He mutes the music and his tone changes…”Last year,” he starts off, “Sweeden and Blakely took top sales team. They’ve got nothing on us, but they are lean and mean and hungry. If we’re going to out sell them we’re going to have to step up our follow-up game, take customer service to the next level, and I think we should put some focus into grooming referrals. What are your thoughts?

                   When the group has finished talking about the ways to out-pace the competition, the discussion changes to the Journey. The team leader talks about the potential ups and downs, the check-in schedules, how to overcome hard days, and what role each will play moving forward. They plan milestones and meetings. Set up stretches.

                   When they are clear on their strategy for the year the team leader asks them to close their eyes and envision the glass winners plaque sitting over their desk. He walks them through the things they can buy with the extra commissions earned, and equally important, he helps them visualize the relationships they will build with clients old and new as they improve their levels of service. He finishes off on an exciting and fun tone that guides them to a vision and celebration of what they are going to get, where they are going to be, and the feelings involved with those rewards. Before they have finished the vision is clear in their minds and they can see and feel the success.

                   Unbeknownst to the team, the team leader has just taken them on the hero’s journey. For you and the group you lead, this approach can look however will best serve your team. Play it up, play it down. Call it the Hero’s Journey or never let on that you’re following a pattern. You get to make it work for you and your situation.

                   When a person is in charge of taking a group of people from point A to point B there are a few things that are crucial to the process. Helping those people to get the vision of what they are working for, getting them on board and excited, empowering them in their roles, helping them to know what needs to be accomplished and either letting them know how it gets to be done or using the team expertise to determine how it gets to be done, and then getting excited about the rewards that can be gained from their efforts. The hero’s journey archetypes set a perfect pattern for being able to lead and achieve these goals.

                   As you implement this tool into your leadership I’d love to hear about your stories of how this works for your team, family or whomever you are leading, and what you learn in the process. Please share your stories with me by going to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and going to the Contact Us page and sending me a note. If you are interested in learning more leadership tools through the use of story, drop me a line also.

                   Thanks to Circle of the 9 Muses by David Hutchens for some of these great ideas.

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1347Wed, 16 Nov 2016 09:00:29 -070015:44falsefullTeam leaders, life coaches, team coaches, parents, teachers, strategy planners, anyone who needs to get people on the same page working toward the completion of a project – today’s podcast is especially for you. Stay tuned for a breakdown of the archetypes within the Heroes Journey and how you can use them to make perfect sense of where and how you need your team, family or group to move toward your final goal. In other words….leadership using the oldest and most reliable tool - story.Lori LeeEpisode 008 Life is Messy and that’s OkayPerhaps life is not about having all the answers, but about the journey of discovering them.

                   Martha Beck, nationally renowned life coach, said, “No part of your experience is wasted. Everything you’ve experienced so far is part of what you were meant to learn.”

                   When life is messy that’s a darn good thing to remember.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Last week we talked about how we make big things happen and this week we are going to talk bluntly about the messiness of life, and how that messiness is perfectly right.

                   When I was really young, a child, I didn’t know what I wanted to be when I grew up. I couldn’t picture myself doing any one particular thing, but I did know that someday I would meet the love of my life and we’d create a family. I had no idea then that 36 years later I’d find my life potentially half over, my youth gone and have 3 ex-husbands, 2 great kids, and that I’d be doing it all alone playing provider, nurturer, home manager, video game monitor, yard maintenance woman, house repair, cook and so on and so on. I didn’t know anything about porn addicts, love affairs, emotional abuse, abandonment, betrayal, heart-break and utter exhaustion.

                   Sometimes, okay, most of the time, life doesn’t turn out how we expect, it’s generally a lot messier, but that’s just the way it is. If you’re feeling picked on, you don’t know enough people intimately. Life is just messy. There may be meaning in my mess, or God may just make the best of a bunch of people’s various decisions, or perhaps shit just happens and we live, try to learn, and move forward. Honestly, I don’t know which it is, but these are the reasons I’ve decided our messy stories are okay.

                    

                   1. It’s okay because that’s the nature of the beast.
                   2. It’s okay because we can learn from our mess.
                   3. It’s okay because from our mess we gain empathy and understanding for other people’s messes and suddenly we are able to plug into the human condition.
                   4. It’s okay because Christ, through his atonement, offers us forgiveness, offers to help us carry our burdens, offers to give us extra strength and ability as we flex our muscles and overcome. John [10:10] “I came that they might have life, and have it abundantly. There is a way to erase the parts that aren’t working and try again.
                   5. It’s okay because from chaos comes the beauty of creation. Chaos is the fuel from which the fire starts.
                   6. It’s okay because each challenge holds an opportunity in its hands for us to become—to behave better in each struggle. To learn something.
                   7. It’s okay because the side trails we find along an unexpected path often hold more for us than a plan of our own making.
                   8. It’s okay because with a mess comes experience and from experience comes wisdom.
                   9. It’s okay because it has to be. It is what it is. Some of it we can control, some of it we can’t, and like it or not we’re along for the ride. Sometimes we will sit up and take notes. Sometimes we will curl up in a ball. Sometimes we will dance with wild abandon. And, although curling up in a ball is not the ideal place any of us want to be. It’s okay to be there when we need to be there.
                   10. It’s okay because God designed the plan and things are playing out as he knew they would.

                   
                   

                    

                   We are in good company.

                   What if we looked at someone as sacred and revered as Christ? That’s a jump to the top, but he is noted for living a perfect life, and yet his life is one of the most...]]>Perhaps life is not about having all the answers, but about the journey of discovering them.

                   Martha Beck, nationally renowned life coach, said, “No part of your experience is wasted. Everything you’ve experienced so far is part of what you were meant to learn.”

                   When life is messy that’s a darn good thing to remember.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Last week we talked about how we make big things happen and this week we are going to talk bluntly about the messiness of life, and how that messiness is perfectly right.

                   When I was really young, a child, I didn’t know what I wanted to be when I grew up. I couldn’t picture myself doing any one particular thing, but I did know that someday I would meet the love of my life and we’d create a family. I had no idea then that 36 years later I’d find my life potentially half over, my youth gone and have 3 ex-husbands, 2 great kids, and that I’d be doing it all alone playing provider, nurturer, home manager, video game monitor, yard maintenance woman, house repair, cook and so on and so on. I didn’t know anything about porn addicts, love affairs, emotional abuse, abandonment, betrayal, heart-break and utter exhaustion.

                   Sometimes, okay, most of the time, life doesn’t turn out how we expect, it’s generally a lot messier, but that’s just the way it is. If you’re feeling picked on, you don’t know enough people intimately. Life is just messy. There may be meaning in my mess, or God may just make the best of a bunch of people’s various decisions, or perhaps shit just happens and we live, try to learn, and move forward. Honestly, I don’t know which it is, but these are the reasons I’ve decided our messy stories are okay.

                    

                   1. It’s okay because that’s the nature of the beast.
                   2. It’s okay because we can learn from our mess.
                   3. It’s okay because from our mess we gain empathy and understanding for other people’s messes and suddenly we are able to plug into the human condition.
                   4. It’s okay because Christ, through his atonement, offers us forgiveness, offers to help us carry our burdens, offers to give us extra strength and ability as we flex our muscles and overcome. John [10:10] “I came that they might have life, and have it abundantly. There is a way to erase the parts that aren’t working and try again.
                   5. It’s okay because from chaos comes the beauty of creation. Chaos is the fuel from which the fire starts.
                   6. It’s okay because each challenge holds an opportunity in its hands for us to become—to behave better in each struggle. To learn something.
                   7. It’s okay because the side trails we find along an unexpected path often hold more for us than a plan of our own making.
                   8. It’s okay because with a mess comes experience and from experience comes wisdom.
                   9. It’s okay because it has to be. It is what it is. Some of it we can control, some of it we can’t, and like it or not we’re along for the ride. Sometimes we will sit up and take notes. Sometimes we will curl up in a ball. Sometimes we will dance with wild abandon. And, although curling up in a ball is not the ideal place any of us want to be. It’s okay to be there when we need to be there.
                   10. It’s okay because God designed the plan and things are playing out as he knew they would.

                   
                   

                    

                   We are in good company.

                   What if we looked at someone as sacred and revered as Christ? That’s a jump to the top, but he is noted for living a perfect life, and yet his life is one of the most heart-wrenching of stories ever recorded.

                   Christ created chaos wherever he went. He turned over the tables in the temple when the money changers were disrespecting the temple grounds. He turned water into wine – I’m sure that was a shock. He healed the sick, which caused people to congregate, causing their own forms of chaos as they followed him around. And what about when he healed folks on the Sabbath – the religious leaders were none to happy about that. He talked to women who were shunned in the community. He associated with sinners and cripples. He rebuked religious leaders who were too caught up in the letter of the law. He upended people’s lifestyles changing fisherman into disciples. His friends fell asleep when he asked them to keep watch at the most crucial time of his life – in the garden of Gethsemane. His best friend denied knowing him 3 times in the heat of the moment. He was betrayed by another of his closest friends. Of course there is his call to atone, to die on the cross– he asked repeatedly if that cup might pass from him – that was not part of what he wanted to go through. Christ, the greatest of us all, knew intimately what a life of chaos and mess looked and felt like.

                   A revered personality from out time, Oprah Winfrey: Billionaire, American television host, actress, producer, philanthropist and entrepreneur.  Oprah Gail Winfrey was born on January 29, 1954, to an unwed mother in Mississippi. After a troubled adolescence in a small community where male relatives and friends of her mother all sexually abused her, a pregnancy at age 14 after which she lost the child, and severe poverty, she moved to Nashville to live with her father. If anyone could have found a list of stories to show why she didn’t have a chance, it was Oprah. She rose above her difficult childhood of poverty and abuse to be lauded as the most influential woman of her generation. She knew what messy was, but as she stated in an interview, it was her ability to be real, to understand real, that made her the media icon that she became (I’m paraphrasing again).

                   A national icon: Abraham Lincoln was raised in humble beginnings. His story started to stray from his plan when his mother died when he was 9. A woman he loved in his early 20’s also died before they could be married, and he was heartbroken. Eventually, he married Mary Todd and they had 4 children – 3 of which died before they made it to adulthood. And then, if you know anything of the intense struggle Lincoln had during his political career as he stood up against one of the most trying times in the history of the United States. His entire life was messy and filled with great loss, risk and bravery. He had to be exhausted by the time he died. These are the heroes – the ones who rise above the mess and soldier on. The great ones who change the world.

                   We could pick any hero, any public figure that we revere, and with even a cursory look into their past, we would find the messiness and trials of being human. We are all in good company with our messy lives.

                   So let’s get personal. When it comes down to it, your peace, with whatever life looks like to you, is between you and God (whatever God looks like to you.)

                   Let me tell a story:

                   When I was a young child my siblings and I would toboggan down the back three-quarter acre of our snow-covered alfalfa field. The hills rolled in the crystal white blanket, the sun sending a million shards of crystal glitter to blind and delight. I would pull my bright blue toboggan, one slow step at a time to the top of the field where I would tumble in, my bundled body ready for the thrill of the down-hill.  One day a storm started to blow in and my mother called us all into the house. I left by blue toboggan out in the yard and only as the wind picked up did I realize I was about to lose it forever. The fields were wide open and stretched for miles, once the wind caught her I wasn’t going to see her again. I stood at our sliding glass door, still a bundled little girl, staring hard at the toboggan, willing it not to move, but the wind picked up and so did my only sled. I prayed then, like only a child really can, and begged Heavenly Father to stop the wind. “Please,” I begged, “I don’t have another sled, I want to be able to play, don’t let me lose it.” And the wind stopped. I ran outside as fast as my legs would churn, pounded across the yard and out into the field where it had blown, grabbed the rope on the front end and pulled it back and into the back door safe and sound. As I closed the door the wind started back up in a frenzy, and suddenly God became real to me. I know there are those who say, “that was a coincidence” but often the things we know spiritually are small to others, but large to us because we felt them spiritually, while outsiders do not have that insight into the experience. It was not coincidence.

                   It was the start of what has been an authentic relationship. In the years that have followed, I have been afraid of him. I have loved him. I have gotten to know him better and refused to be afraid of him. He and I have shared jaw-dropping landscapes, views from the top of mountain peaks. We have sat next to streams and lakes. We have talked in my car, in my sleep, on my bike, on my couch, and a hundred other places. We have cried together the tears of the broken, tears of utter sadness, tears of loneliness. We have not spoken for days and weeks at a time. He has waited on me, and I on him. I have called and he has not answered. He has called and I have not answered. I have pouted and demanded I be allowed to do things my own way. He is always okay with that. He’s always been there to pick me up at the end when I find myself face down in the mud. But he’s never removed the experience.  We’ve argued over principles, discussed things that I don’t think work. I’ve begged for help and he’s left me on my own sometimes and other times he’s instantly given help. He’s warned me, directed me, comforted me. He has whispered in my waking hours to remind me he is with me. I try to find my way around the commandments that don’t make sense to me, and certainly, the ones that don’t seem to work. It’s an on-going, sometimes tumultuous relationship, but it’s our relationship, and that’s what counts. Maybe it’s a little messy too. But it’s all between me and him. Sometimes I’ve felt my problems were so unfair. I mean I try really hard to live a good life. And I, like many a God-fearing folk, have exclaimed “why me,” when we are doing our best.

                   Scott Peck said, in The Road Less Traveled,

                   “Problems call forth our courage and our wisdom; indeed they create our courage and our wisdom. It is only because of problems that we grow mentally and spiritually.”

                   Did you hear that? Mess is part of Creation.  Embrace it. Love your mess. Love your story! It’s the only one you have. And, let’s not forget the whole point of this podcast…the idea is that we get to decide how we interpret, use, and accept our own messy stories. Maybe even celebrate the Pollack style canvas of our lives.

                   A predominant backdrop to my life story is nature! In nature I find peace, beauty, meaning, but also a crazy messiness of death and birth, the ruthless and heart-warming, the raging wildfires and the sun-dappled meadows, the ice-encrusted mountain peaks and the blue water and white sand beaches. There are droughts and earthquakes, storms and tidal waves, and there are Giant Redwood forests and migrating whales. There is supreme organization and ruthless destruction. Let me end today’s podcast with an essay and a few lessons from nature:

                   I washed my face with a Kleenex this morning. Strange as it sounds this is one of the things I like best about outdoor living – wiping my hands on a rock, or on my shorts because they will inevitably get dirty anyway. I can farmer hanky (which I would never do at home) and if it’s not exactly clean I can wipe it on my sleeve. I wear a hat or bandana because doing your hair out here would be ridiculous, and my only make-up is sunscreen. Of course, there is also the reflection of the sun on the water, the heat on my skin, the prickles across my legs on a cold night, the smell of campfire in the air, the mesmerizing stars and the utter chaos of nature itself.

                   Deep in the marrow of my bones I am connected to the land. It is something I could not remove even if I wanted. Quality of life is dependent upon this tangible intangible for me. It is required for peace of soul, like food and love. Sometimes it requires time to understand this type of connection, and some people never will, but for those of us who are drawn back to caress the face of the rock, to hold the trees against our own bodies, to give our sweat on the next ascent, wilderness always calling us back, it is as if all that mattered so much before we came, no longer matters and we are suddenly home. It is the beauty of nature in all its raw uncaring, it’s crazy chaos, it’s death and birth in the same place at the same time, its colorful pallet of textures and colors, and the way that so much of what we try to recreate was first created here. Elizabeth Barrett Browning said, “Earth is crammed with heaven.” Amen to that!

                   Riding in a hot air balloon over Park City, Utah I got the unusual view of looking down upon a river. I studied its crazy path as it scooped, hooped and meandered forming odd mushroom spire shapes as it found the path of least resistance down the face of the land. We do that too sometimes. Man’s general tendency to avoid pain, find the easiest way forward, and to minimize energy output effects our decisions and we wind our way through life creating crazy designs with our life path.

                   Thoreau said, “It’s not what you look at, but what you see.” On some occasions I see nothing but the river, the tree, the flowers, the stars and the underbrush; they are nothing but what they are. At other times I look at the shining mirror-dimples the sun spreads across the surface of the water, and hear the rumble as it runs toward the ocean and I learn lessons – life lessons.

                   After climbing the Grand Teton without stopping, one agonizing step at a time, I came to realize first-hand the oft-used metaphore that life is like climbing a mountain. When things get tough you just keep lifting one foot after the other. Even if you have to use your hands and manually lift your leg; just keep moving and pretty soon you’ll be sitting at the top, signing in at the register and looking at the sunrise and the view. The reward for the journey is not only the rich flow of life on the way up, it’s not just the reward of the summit, it’s also the things you learn about life such as ‘keep on truckin’, and ‘sometimes you have to wait it out in the rain,’ then there’s: ‘preparation is NOT overrated’, and ‘life is in a constant state of deconstruction and rebirth’.

                   Because of my time in nature I have a healthy understanding and respect for it. It is perfect in its systems of growth, sustaining, regulating. If you carve out a path and don’t maintain it, the plants will reclaim it. If you take some life form out of the food chain, out of the circle of life, you upset the whole. It doesn’t matter how much you love nature, if you’re out on a mountain top caught in a storm it can kill you without remorse. It is a space of utter chaos and utter organization.

                   Here’s a thought. Our lives have these same aspects – moments of ruthless chaos, and days where you’ve got it under control. Nature is perfect in its brutality and beauty. I suspect life is also – and if today isn’t the day you can see the big picture, don’t despair, trust the process, embrace the beautiful horrible mess of your life, and love your story. What’s your other option?

                   Thanks for tuning in today. Love to hear your thoughts and comments on today’s podcast. Go to www.loveyourstorypodcast.com and share. This week’s challenge is to choose one aspect of your life that is particularly messy and write a list of 5 reasons why it’s okay. An exercise that may help is to determine one of the things you are most grateful for and then step by step go backward into why you have that blessing in your life. Almost always you find that it was something difficult or messy in your life that eventually brought you to a beloved blessing.

                   Have fun telling your stories this week and I’ll see you back here next week on Love Your Story podcast.

                    

                    

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1343Wed, 09 Nov 2016 14:25:39 -070019:17falsefullPerhaps life is not about having all the answers, but about the journey of discovering them.<br /> <br /> Martha Beck, nationally renowned life coach, said, “No part of your experience is wasted. Everything you’ve experienced so far is part of what you were meant to learn.” <br /> <br /> When life is messy that’s a darn good thing to remember.Lori LeeEpisode 007 Step Into The Arena! Which stories stop you from going all the way?Thomas Edison said, “Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.”

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Last week we talked about those devastating one liners and weeding them out. This week we’re telling stories about how you really get to have the things you want most. What it means to do what it takes to make something happen.

                   When I was 18 I launched my own little hand-made jewelry business. I strung beautiful handmade beads on leather and I sold to ski resort gift shops. This was well before jewelery making was cool, or Michael’s a had a whole aisle of jewelry making supplies. I was working my way through college, and my entrepreneurial yearnings created this business as a side venture to working at Fred Meyer between college classes. I had 5 or 6 orders from various resorts, but it never got any bigger than that. When I was a stay-at-home mom I launched a fun business of designing personalized candy-bar wrappers for birthdays, weddings, any party or event – I designed the custom wrapper, printed the wrappers and wrapped the candy bars. Shipped them in ice-bagged insulated boxes so the chocolate wouldn’t melt. I put all the money into the software, the design training and the production, but fell short of putting in the marketing dollars needed, so my return on investment was a handful of orders from neighbors and friends, a new-found skill of design, an iMac, a high-end paper cutter and cases of candy bars. A few years ago when my newest hiking guidebook came out – Best Hikes Near Salt Lake City, published by Falcon guides, I put together a gorgeous plan for week-long hiking retreats that involved mountain lodgings, massage, yoga, an in-house cook and daily guided hikes in the Northern mountains of Utah. Same thing happened, all the planning, designing, arranging for providers, and when it came time to persevere through the swamps of finding clients I got bored and wandered onto the next thing caring a sense of failure at not pushing through and taking it all the way. I ended up guiding day hiking trips, but it was nothing like I had pictured. I could have put in the time and effort to market it, for sure, but if I have a wonderful idea and a snazzy product shouldn’t clients come to me? I hated to have to sell people on anything, and so these business “failures” made a tidy little stack in my bookshelf of stories.

                   One of the stories I started telling myself, that was not serving me well, was that if I put time and effort into a new venture that it will all be a waste of time and resources because in the end it will fall flat. I mean it’s happened 3 times. There is this fear monster that pops up when I contemplate doing something that might make a difference, to me or the world, and I am flooded with a fear of failure, a fear of wasted time, and a fear of wasting money on something that in the end won’t launch.

                   Now, like all our stories, there are reasons I have this fear. Namely my past experience. While sometimes our fears seem to pop out of nowhere, they often do originate from some disappointment that we don’t want to relive. But the past doesn’t have to define the future.

                   The other day I was looking through a post that Lewis Howe’s, a popular podcaster and NY Times best-selling author wrote about how he got his book on the NY Times best seller list. It was a tremendous list of hard work, networking, selling, finagling, up-selling and going the extra mile to market his own work. As I read his list of “how he did]]>Thomas Edison said, “Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.”

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Last week we talked about those devastating one liners and weeding them out. This week we’re telling stories about how you really get to have the things you want most. What it means to do what it takes to make something happen.

                   When I was 18 I launched my own little hand-made jewelry business. I strung beautiful handmade beads on leather and I sold to ski resort gift shops. This was well before jewelery making was cool, or Michael’s a had a whole aisle of jewelry making supplies. I was working my way through college, and my entrepreneurial yearnings created this business as a side venture to working at Fred Meyer between college classes. I had 5 or 6 orders from various resorts, but it never got any bigger than that. When I was a stay-at-home mom I launched a fun business of designing personalized candy-bar wrappers for birthdays, weddings, any party or event – I designed the custom wrapper, printed the wrappers and wrapped the candy bars. Shipped them in ice-bagged insulated boxes so the chocolate wouldn’t melt. I put all the money into the software, the design training and the production, but fell short of putting in the marketing dollars needed, so my return on investment was a handful of orders from neighbors and friends, a new-found skill of design, an iMac, a high-end paper cutter and cases of candy bars. A few years ago when my newest hiking guidebook came out – Best Hikes Near Salt Lake City, published by Falcon guides, I put together a gorgeous plan for week-long hiking retreats that involved mountain lodgings, massage, yoga, an in-house cook and daily guided hikes in the Northern mountains of Utah. Same thing happened, all the planning, designing, arranging for providers, and when it came time to persevere through the swamps of finding clients I got bored and wandered onto the next thing caring a sense of failure at not pushing through and taking it all the way. I ended up guiding day hiking trips, but it was nothing like I had pictured. I could have put in the time and effort to market it, for sure, but if I have a wonderful idea and a snazzy product shouldn’t clients come to me? I hated to have to sell people on anything, and so these business “failures” made a tidy little stack in my bookshelf of stories.

                   One of the stories I started telling myself, that was not serving me well, was that if I put time and effort into a new venture that it will all be a waste of time and resources because in the end it will fall flat. I mean it’s happened 3 times. There is this fear monster that pops up when I contemplate doing something that might make a difference, to me or the world, and I am flooded with a fear of failure, a fear of wasted time, and a fear of wasting money on something that in the end won’t launch.

                   Now, like all our stories, there are reasons I have this fear. Namely my past experience. While sometimes our fears seem to pop out of nowhere, they often do originate from some disappointment that we don’t want to relive. But the past doesn’t have to define the future.

                   The other day I was looking through a post that Lewis Howe’s, a popular podcaster and NY Times best-selling author wrote about how he got his book on the NY Times best seller list. It was a tremendous list of hard work, networking, selling, finagling, up-selling and going the extra mile to market his own work. As I read his list of “how he did it” I felt a little sick. Holy cow, it was a tremendous amount of work. I always leave it up to my publishers to promote my books, I mean really, isn’t that their job? But I couldn’t deny that reading about all the work he went through to get his book to go big was a price he was willing to pay to reach that milestone. I began to realize that if you want really big things you don’t drop the ball when it comes to promoting your idea. That seems like a no-brainer, but I saw it in a way that shed the light of responsibility on me. Whatever that idea is. It’s not up to somebody else – I get to support my own idea. I get to carry it through to the end. And if I’m not willing to do that up front, then I get to wait for an idea that I’m willing to work for.

                   My stories of failure were suddenly challenged by the realization that I dropped the ball and I didn’t have to. It was something I could control. Now, if I can control it, then I don’t have to be afraid of it. I didn’t have to be afraid of investing in myself, or looking silly, or wasting time, because without the fear you just keep pushing it through to the top. You push, as Thomas Edison said, one more time. And he would know. Story has it that: As an inventor, Edison made 1,000 unsuccessful attempts at inventing the light bulb. When a reporter asked, “How did it feel to fail 1,000 times?” Edison replied, “I didn’t fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps.”

                   Find a new outlet, a new resource, a new contact. It’s up to me, up to you, if we want our ideas to go big. We don’t get to give up on ourselves.

                   Here’s my question to you: What is the story that is stopping you from taking your idea, whatever it is – your ideal romantic relationship, your own taco truck business, your vision for your career as the next great physicist, your community garden, the bike race you want to organize, the friends you want to make…what is the story that is feeding your fear and stopping you from going for it – pushing past the “I’m going to fail so why bother” voice that tries so hard to keep us all in a space of mediocrity and smallness? I know, it feels real – the story feels like truth. But what if that excuse wasn’t there any more? What if?

                   Nelson Mandela said, “It always seems impossible until it is done.”  What if the stories you gave space in your head for were stories and visions of you accomplishing this thing you really want? Maybe it feels impossible right now at this moment, but today’s ceiling is tomorrow’s floor. One step at a time we create. One step at a time we create. And before we will take that step we have to believe, or have faith that our efforts will bear fruit. All creation starts in the mind with an idea, and then with a belief in that idea, and then with enough faith we begin to take that first step, and then that second step, and then that third. That’s how everything man-made was ever created. You see your refridgerator? Your car? The building across the street? Your favorite coffee shop? The book you’re reading? All these things were created in this way. First as an idea, second as a belief in the idea, and third with the steps to make it happen.

                   One of my favorite sayings – I have it taped to my fridge —  is “Tomorrow begins today.” I’ve become a fan of looking at large projects in steps. It’s the idea of eating an elephant one bite at a time. Today we get to plant a tomato seed and tomorrow, with enough care, we get to sow tomatoes. But to get that tomato harvest we have to plant, and one day at a time we get to water, weed, and fertilize. It’s possible, it’s doable, so start…if you want tomatoes.

                   Mark Twain said, “The secret to getting ahead is getting started.” Then there’s the other saying that showing up is half the battle. There is a funny cartoon of two warriors in their battle gear facing a whole army that is ready to attack. They are clearly outnumbered and about to die, and the one soldier says to the other, “Anymore words of wisdom, Mr. Showing Up is Half the Battle.” Yes, you’re not going to get ahead unless you get started, AND if you don’t show up you’ve got NO chance, but in my case, it’s that other half of the battle that I’m learning about. The half where you push through the road blocks, and where you promote your own dreams, and you try 1000 times using different approaches if your past attempts aren’t working out.

                   Thomas Edison was speaking to me when he said, “Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.”

                   I know that we all have that voice in our heads (like we talked about in episode 6) – some think of it as the voice of reason, some know it’s the devil on their shoulder, some don’t recognize it at all because they just thinks it’s their earned wisdom, but today you get to listen to the voice.

                   Write down what the excuses are that you give yourself for not doing that thing you really want to do. Then do yourself a favor and realize that the voice is a STORY. Without that story what could you do? Find your way around that story, blow it out of the water. It might hurt to make that stretch, but you wouldn’t want the thing you want if it weren’t worth having, would you? If you don’t do it today, when will you? The stories don’t change until we decide to work through them. Until WE CHANGE THEM and start to allow for real possibility. They are our stories.

                   One of my big life dreams was to get my master’s degree and my Ph.D. I had put that on hold after I got divorced from my first husband because I had small kids and I needed to support them and focus on other aspects of living. But always when I thought about what I wanted to do before I died, my continued schooling was incredibly important to me. I had lots of reasons I couldn’t do it – I didn’t have the money, I didn’t have the time, I couldn’t relocate with kids who needed to stay in their schools. Well, let me tell you about one of the most difficult and magical things I have ever done:

                   I think it was Facebook. I get a message from a high school friend, a dear friend I hadn’t seen for many years, and she’s inviting me to be her +1 for her high school reunion. She’d recently been divorced and didn’t want to go by herself, so I was the lucky gal to be her escort. We spent the night catching up and she told me she was working on her masters degree. Wonder of wonders, she was in the exact program, at the exact school, that I had planned to apply for. I had no idea we had this similar interest, but the more we talked the more our studies and schooling goals strangely coincided. When I asked how she had done it, she explained that she had received a fellowship of twenty thousand dollars to the program. I got all the details and as I pondered on the idea I felt certain I could get that fellowship for the following year because I had 20 years more publishing experience than any kid fresh out of college. With that money I could see a way to make it happen. One by one she helped me work through all those stories that stopped me. I didn’t have to spend a year studying for the GRE because I could take the GMAT which one could not really study for. It relieved a great deal of pressure for me to go that route. So, step, by step I filled out applications, took tests, wrote letters, put together referral contacts and submitted my application for grad school. She had arranged her classes in such a way that she only had to be on campus once a week, and I could see that being doable, so I forged ahead with a plan of 20K fellowship and once a week on campus. Well, I got accepted to the program, but when we got the award letters, I had been invited to teach at the University, but the fellowship was not awarded that year. I was surprised and dismayed, things were not working out as I had planned, but I was sorely tempted because of the teaching position. I’d always wanted to teach at a university and this was my chance. It had all happened so fast, and the reality of it was not in the shape or form that I had envisioned and thus dared to move forward with, but one thing led to another and before I knew it I was making the final decision about whether or not I could devote the next two years of my life, with two teenage sons, to a masters degree that would require 3 hours a day of commute through all weather conditions, while teaching at the university, while carrying a full graduate class load, and while continuing on with my career in real estate that kept food on the table and a roof over our heads. While any sane person would have said no way, the dream was so big, and here was my chance. So I did it. I plunged in and every day for the next two years I counted minutes. If I stopped for gas at the gas station 5 miles before the university, I could pee while the gas tank filled and then I could hit the road, and if there was not traffic I would arrive on campus, if I could find parking, with just enough time to walk up the hill and arrive at the English Department building with 2 minutes to spare. My whole life was scheduled this way. How many times did I wish that text books were on Audible so I could listen to the 100 pages of reading, per night, while walking up that hill and across campus. On warm fall days I brought my bike so I could get across campus faster, and I found apps that allowed me to scan real estate documents from my class room on campus, instead of working from my real estate office. I graded papers til 3 a.m. and got up at [6:00] to be to my [8:00] class. It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done, but I did it, and I graduated before most of the other 20somethings that started the program with me, who did not have kids, or jobs, or commutes. I pulled a 3.95 GPA and won writing awards for poetry, non-fiction and research both years of my program. I kicked ass. And do you know why? Because I wanted it! I wanted it. And when you really want something, you find a way around the obstacles. I look back at the whole thing in awe. In complete wonder at what a determined soul can do. Was I afraid of failure? I had no idea how I was going to pull it off. It was a complete act of faith. I believed in myself, I knew of my intent and desire, and on the first day of school, as I’m driving my 1.5 hour drive I’m having an internal freak out about. My thought was God is just waiting for me to make a mistake and all of this is going to get pulled out from under me. I don’t even know where that thought came from, but it was quickly replaced with another thought that said, God is not about waiting for you to fail so he can take things away, he is your support, he is here to help you do what is not possible for you to do on your own. And I knew that was true. But I still had no idea how it was going to unfold and what price I would pay.

                   When the voice pops up and says “what about failure?” Well, life is messy. I don’t know anyone who likes failure. But what do you think of the idea that failure is a portal. Yes a portal. Failure is a window into what to change, how to do something different in the future, a window into our own strengths and weaknesses, a window to the world around us.

                   Brene’ Brown, I’ve mentioned her work here in episode 2, is a researcher and NY Times best-selling author on the topics of shame and vulnerability. In her book, Standing Strong, she often refers to the people who are in the “arena” falling flat on their faces as they tackle challenges, try new things, and pick themselves up, lick their wounds and try again, as the “badasses!” The folks on the side, safely watching and criticizing, those are the cowards, the ones not living. You can find a dozen Ted Talks and podcasts on why failure is ok and in some cases encouraged. Why it is necessary if we wish to progress. I reiterate the words – nobody likes to fail. It hurts. It sucks. It can be embarrassing. But no one really lives big without getting in the arena and getting dirty, and no one gets in the arena without falling down a time or two. So the fear of failure doesn’t get to stop you from making things happen – because it will, stop you.

                   I get to look back at my failed business ventures with forgiveness for myself and the things I didn’t yet understand about myself, with a greater understanding of the work I need to put in if I want to go all the way.  I see through my portal a clear picture of what Does Not work. I also hear and recognize the voices that try to stop me everyday – yes, everyday – but I use what I’ve learned and I fight them off, even when I’m terrified. But that’s the struggle in the arena. That’s where the champions are born. You get to be a champion by looking at the stories you tell yourself that stop you from living the life you want to live, and you get to get rid of them completely, or rewrite them so they serve you – reframe (episode 1) those failures so you can see clearly through the portal. And that’s how you become the hero of your story (episode 2), by fighting off the things that hold you back. By not staying in the dark moments. By standing back up when you fail, because you will sometimes, and that’s okay. All the real heroes do.

                   Your challenge this week is to think about that one thing on your bucket list that you’ve never done but really want to – and then list out all the excuses why you haven’t – find the stories. Then you get to find a way around everyone of those stories. Log onto our website: www.loveyourstorypodcast.com….and tell us how you do it!

                   Have a great week of creating and telling stories. Get rid of the ones that hold you back. Retell the ones that build and empower you! See you next week on the Love Your Story podcast. And, if you enjoyed this podcast, make sure you subscribe and give us a review!

                    

                    

                    

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1337Wed, 02 Nov 2016 16:09:53 -070020:54falsefullWhat is the story that is stopping you from taking your idea, whatever it is – your ideal romantic relationship, your own taco truck business, your vision for your career as the next great physicist, your community garden, the bike race you want to organize, the friends you want to make…what is the story that is feeding your fear and stopping you from going for it – pushing past the “I’m going to fail so why bother” voice that tries so hard to keep us all in a space of mediocrity and smallness? I know, it feels real – the story feels like truth. But what if that excuse wasn’t there any more? What if?Lori LeeEpisode 006 One Line Stories – Like Kryptonite to SupermanLittle stories – one-liners, are sometimes the most powerful kryptonite in the story arsenal. Kryptonite had the power to drain Superman’s strength – it was the one thing that could bring him down. His Achilles heel. In fact, in the original comic it was suggested that he was a boring character because he had NO weaknesses. That was the point that Kryptonite was introduced into the story. We humans are anything but boring. Complex and filled with beautiful gifts, we also all have this voice in our heads that speaks to us, most often in derogative, critical tones, if not outright comments about our worth and our abilities. Let’s talk about this voice, these powerful one-liners, because they do the same thing to humans that kryptonite does to Superman. They take away our power, leave us weak and unable to use our strong and capable gifts. It’s time to get rid of them.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Last week we talked about forgiveness – how we do not give anyone the right to smoother our light. Today we are going to talk about one-liner lies that eat away at our souls. Sounds dramatic, but it kinda is.

                   The swimmer pulled his body from the pool as the water slid from his sleek physique. He grabbed a towel and dried his hair relishing the time of his last set of laps. He smiled to himself as he turned to head to the locker room, and just that quickly he heard the familiar voice in his head whisper, “Well ya, but you’ll never hit the next goal. You’re just too slow.” His momentary success was lost, that quickly, under a pile of words that played across his mind every day while he trained. As he walked toward the locker room he hardly noticed the smile on his face disappear, or the lilt in his step slow.

                   Across town a woman in a red dress, who loved to sing and dance, even dreamed of doing it on stage, shuffled around at her coffee shop job, singing when she closed in the evenings because daring to dream for anything more was just silly. Whenever she toyed with the idea of trying out for a production at the local theater the voice in her head reminder her that she was nobody. “Why would you be able to do that?” it queried. “Who do you think you are?” And so she shuffled and sang to the walls and the expresso machine, and the paper cups as she stacked them next to their paper sleeves.

                   The teen  walked with his friends down the long hallway at school. The sign taped to the gray locker caught his attention. Tryouts for the soccer team were next week. He’d love to play. He’d been toying with trying out, but he knew his skill was somewhere in the middle of the road, and what if he made a fool of himself. What if he tried and didn’t make it? It was so much easier not to stand out because then you could fly under the radar. “you’re not that good,” the voice in his head parroted as it did every time he thought about trying. “It’s safer, not to try.”

                   These three examples are simple, standard, happen over and over every day, in a 7 billion individual ways. You’re not alone. I don’t know why, but it seems to be universal that everyone has this voice in their head. I’ve often wondered, what if that natural voice in our head was a cheerleader instead – a voice that told us we are wonderful and can be and have wonderful things. What if the little nit-picky voice wasn’t nit-picking and amplifying our fears and was instead creating possibility for us. What would the world be like then?

                   Well, this is the point where the powerful take control. And, yes, YOU are powerful. Today’s podcast is an...]]>Little stories – one-liners, are sometimes the most powerful kryptonite in the story arsenal. Kryptonite had the power to drain Superman’s strength – it was the one thing that could bring him down. His Achilles heel. In fact, in the original comic it was suggested that he was a boring character because he had NO weaknesses. That was the point that Kryptonite was introduced into the story. We humans are anything but boring. Complex and filled with beautiful gifts, we also all have this voice in our heads that speaks to us, most often in derogative, critical tones, if not outright comments about our worth and our abilities. Let’s talk about this voice, these powerful one-liners, because they do the same thing to humans that kryptonite does to Superman. They take away our power, leave us weak and unable to use our strong and capable gifts. It’s time to get rid of them.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Last week we talked about forgiveness – how we do not give anyone the right to smoother our light. Today we are going to talk about one-liner lies that eat away at our souls. Sounds dramatic, but it kinda is.

                   The swimmer pulled his body from the pool as the water slid from his sleek physique. He grabbed a towel and dried his hair relishing the time of his last set of laps. He smiled to himself as he turned to head to the locker room, and just that quickly he heard the familiar voice in his head whisper, “Well ya, but you’ll never hit the next goal. You’re just too slow.” His momentary success was lost, that quickly, under a pile of words that played across his mind every day while he trained. As he walked toward the locker room he hardly noticed the smile on his face disappear, or the lilt in his step slow.

                   Across town a woman in a red dress, who loved to sing and dance, even dreamed of doing it on stage, shuffled around at her coffee shop job, singing when she closed in the evenings because daring to dream for anything more was just silly. Whenever she toyed with the idea of trying out for a production at the local theater the voice in her head reminder her that she was nobody. “Why would you be able to do that?” it queried. “Who do you think you are?” And so she shuffled and sang to the walls and the expresso machine, and the paper cups as she stacked them next to their paper sleeves.

                   The teen  walked with his friends down the long hallway at school. The sign taped to the gray locker caught his attention. Tryouts for the soccer team were next week. He’d love to play. He’d been toying with trying out, but he knew his skill was somewhere in the middle of the road, and what if he made a fool of himself. What if he tried and didn’t make it? It was so much easier not to stand out because then you could fly under the radar. “you’re not that good,” the voice in his head parroted as it did every time he thought about trying. “It’s safer, not to try.”

                   These three examples are simple, standard, happen over and over every day, in a 7 billion individual ways. You’re not alone. I don’t know why, but it seems to be universal that everyone has this voice in their head. I’ve often wondered, what if that natural voice in our head was a cheerleader instead – a voice that told us we are wonderful and can be and have wonderful things. What if the little nit-picky voice wasn’t nit-picking and amplifying our fears and was instead creating possibility for us. What would the world be like then?

                   Well, this is the point where the powerful take control. And, yes, YOU are powerful. Today’s podcast is an awareness rallying cry. The first step is awareness, right? Let’s talk about these one line stories, give credit where credit is due and realize what they do to us, then let’s use our power ever day to shut them down when they start prattling on in our heads.

                   Have you taken one of the myriad personality tests? There are plenty to choose from as we seek to understand ourselves and others better. They pinpoint and categorize behavior patterns so that people can choose a career that aligns with their strengths, or learn how to get along with people who have different behavior patterns, or to understand oneself and why you do what you do. They are used for all kinds of reasons, and I dare say that most people have taken one or two.

                   I’m a predominantly Red personality. Depending upon which personality test you take, I’m a controller, a Type A, a get-things-done sorta chic. Type A personalities are the folks who make things happen. They lead, they create, they follow through, they want respect, they prize freedom. There are so many great things about this personality type. As with all of the personality types, there are also things about Reds/Type A’s that irritate others.

                   Over the years I have accumulated the occasional comment from a client, friend, family member that I’m too controlling, too opinionated, too strong. These comments, some of them from people I loved and felt loyalty too, were often hurtful. Over time I took these comments, these one-liners, ignoring all the positive comments from other sources that lauded my strength, that celebrated my ability to achieve, that praised my authentic and honest nature, and instead focused on the friend who abandoned me, or the boyfriend who didn’t like to be challenged, and the folks who didn’t want to hear the truth, and I internalized a story about myself that I was difficult.  This story had a profound effect on me. I felt like it was truth because it was based in real life experience (granted, I have learned, a very limited aspect of my experience), and the repetition of this one liner I said to myself – Your Difficult– affected my self-perception. Once loving, outgoing and excited, I eventually started to stay inside my house and only chose to go out with people with whom I felt safe. I had great relationships with these friends; we had fun and created great memories, and who I am was something they loved, but I knew I was playing small. My world had become a select group of people that it had taken me years to truly trust. In my heart I realized this smallness was not serving me. I realized I had come to a point in life that was tired and protective, but I felt I was there for good reason and I just didn’t know how to get out of it, or frankly if I wanted to. It was unsatisfying, but it was safe. And after a few arrows in my back safety is important.

                   As I came to learn more about how we create our own stories, and I took an emotional intelligence workshop that I’ve referred to in other episodes, I worked with personal coaches who helped me get back in touch with the authentic me—the me that loves, and skips,  believes in myself, and even dares to be vulnerable. It is a process, I’ll be honest, but I see the stories now. I see how I let a handful of experiences with people whose perception of an experience with me was negative, through their lens, take precedence over the hundreds, thousands of other comments over those same years where I was praised, applauded, loved and enjoyed by so many other people.

                   We all do this – Think about the last time someone criticized you and how much credence you gave this comment – how much it bothered you – how much power you allowed it to have. I can stew on a good insult for ages because it’s hurtful. Then think about the last time you were complimented, and how you brushed it off.  Sometimes I don’t even acknowledge compliments I get, and afterward, I’m wondering to myself why I ignored the woman who told me she liked my outfit. Often times I  can’t even remember a compliment, or won’t for long, because compliments tend to roll off our backs. There’s an actual evolutionary reason for this – in a nutshell, it’s because we are programmed to remember things that hurt us so we can stay away from them. The hurtful things get larger memory space to help keep us safe. We simply aren’t programmed to spend hours, days or weeks ruminating over the lady in the grocery line who told us we had darling children or the congratulatory comment the boss gave us after our big presentation or the time a dear friend told us how amazing we make his life. We’d be far better off spending time on that though than spending that time thinking about the person who told us we needed to lose weight, or said we were difficult, or insulted our taste in paisley pants. You hear me?

                   Here’s a truth: The stories we create about ourselves can become immensely heavy. Criticism from others builds up in our hearts and minds, and before you know it you are seeing yourself through the lens of the haters. The hater’s information can be completely inaccurate – their perception, not your authentic self, but that doesn’t matter to us when we repeat their stories. We eat it up and pretty soon we are telling a story about our unworthiness. We are too fat, too thin, too stupid, too difficult, too damaged, too unworthy to be the amazing person we came here to be. These stories are so powerful because our perception is our reality, and what we perceive as reality can make or break us. The story we repeat to ourselves gets assimilated into who we are, and pretty soon we are hiding, or living small, or ready to give up, or unable to engage in a productive life.

                   A lot of these stories are assimilated from childhood. What if your step father told you you’d never be good at anything? The thing we don’t realize as children is that this comment was a reflection of the person who made it, it had nothing to do with the reality of who you were and are. Those peers, parents, teachers, aunt or uncle who undervalued you, or put on too much pressure, or neglected to tell you about your strengths, criticized you or actively tried to tear you down, their words are about them, not about you.  First and foremost, we must realize their comments are by no means reality. They are not the special truth about who we are –our authentic self. They are comments that come from hurt and damaged people reflecting their own insecurities. Everybody has an opinion – but we don’t have to listen to all the opinions, and we certainly don’t need to take their opinions as fact. Haters will always be out there – especially if you try to do something big. But just like the Olympic athletes who have to drown out the noises of the crowds, we get to learn how to block out the noise and the one-line judgment stories that don’t serve us. Other’s opinions only have the power we give them. That’s real stuff people – the game is in our own heads, and if we first realize their comments aren’t fact, and second, stop listening to the doubters, they got no way in baby!

                   What story have you made up about yourself? Think about this seriously. For me, I didn’t even realize they were stories – I saw them as fact. I am getting older, but did that really make me too old to find love? I had put on a few pounds since turning 40, but was I really unacceptable because of it? I am strong, but that strength helped me to survive an emotionally abusive husband, it helped me to survive traumas like my son being diagnosed with Leukemia, it helped me stand up and try for love a ridiculous number of times. We are not unworthy. We are not small. We are not powerless, so shut those voices down. If there is a voice in your head that is holding you back, then it’s not serving you. Your authentic self is wonderful and filled with potential, no matter who you are.

                   I know it’s not always easy to change our stories – especially these one-liners that feel simply like things we know–, but once you can see that they are false, that older people are always finding love, that all shapes and sizes of bodies are gorgeous and worthy, and that different people are attracted to different body types, that being a powerful woman is not something to be ashamed of…then you begin to wholly accept yourself!

                   While the hater’s comments still sting, cause no-one likes to be criticized, you come to know your authentic self and you can shake off the haters and their own small spaces, and the false stories that you repeat to yourself every day. Even the flaws you consider yourself to have are only flaws because you tell yourself they are. My son is often looking in the mirror complaining that one eyebrow might be higher than the other, or one nostril is not shaped like the other, or one ear sits higher on his head. None of these things are noticeably true, but if he continues to obsess about them pretty soon he’ll genuinely think there is something wrong with the way he looks. He’ll be self-conscious and concerned about things he’s created.

                   So, first and foremost accept your whole self. See your own beauty, your own potential, reconnect with the dreams you once thought you might create. Believe in yourself and check the voices in your head and the stories they tell you every day when you look in the mirror, when you try for something hard, when you need to stand up for yourself. Check the voices and the stories and weed out the lies, so you can fly!

                   I have a friend whom I will call Bonnie. As a young girl, she was filled with life and joy and fun. She danced and played and wasn’t the least self-conscious of her darling round body. As she got older and comments were made about her weight, she became self-conscious. Each segment of her life, adolescence, college, adulthood were marked mentally for her by her perception of her weight and what others might be thinking. The voices she listened to told her that somehow she was less than those who fit the magazine cover image. It’s a tough culture we live in when it comes to body image. There is no doubt about that. It’s an uphill battle. But what difference could it make if the voice in your head wasn’t saying “You’re too fat,” but “You’re beautiful.” How would she have lived differently? How would I live differently? How would you live differently? Who do those voices in our head serve – the one-liner kryptonite that cripple us from the inside out, or do we shut those down and replace them with one-liners that we create on purpose. One-liners like, hell ya, I’m awesome. I got this. I’m a beautiful woman. I am filled with love. I have gifts to share. My voice matters. I’m amazing.  Whatever you need to hear.

                   So for those of you thinking, well, if I get repeated feedback and I never listen to it, then how do I improve? Or I only tell my sister she needs to clean her house because I’m afraid her kids are going to get a disease from the stagnating fast food wrappers all over the floor. Let me say that when we get feedback from others it can definitley give us insights to consider. For instance, I understand a little more now about how some personalities feel challenged or embarrassed or run over by people who come across bold and in charge. I am working to improve and refine my skill sets. I’m working on learning how to be more supportive with souls for whom directness is too much. I’m learning to allow instead of insist my children do things my way.  I have learned that there are lots of other leaders and I can stand back and lead only when I’m needed, or feel strongly about an issue. We can use repetitive feedback from multiple sources to inform and guide us, but never to define us. We are not the interpretation of others, we are always worthy, always enough, and that’s the place we need to work from, because that belief in our authentic self, the self we all need to get in touch with, is the space from which we can love, without judgment. Get rid of the judgment, celebrate your beauty! Celebrate your beauty!

                   My challenge to you this week is to write a love letter to yourself. Remind yourself of your greatness, your potential, your talents and charms. Love yourself first and foremost, it’s the foundation for greatness!

                   Have fun out there telling your stories, and I’ll see you next week on Love Your Story Podcast.

                    

                    

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1333Wed, 26 Oct 2016 17:01:08 -070019:10falsefullLittle stories – one-liners, are sometimes the most powerful kryptonite in the story arsenal. Kryptonite had the power to drain Superman’s strength – it was the one thing that could bring him down. His Achilles heel. In fact, in the original comic it was suggested that he was a boring character because he had NO weaknesses. That was the point that Kryptonite was introduced into the story. We humans are anything but boring. Complex and filled with beautiful gifts, we also all have this voice in our heads that speaks to us, most often in derogative, critical tones, if not outright comments about our worth and our abilities. Let’s talk about this voice, these powerful one-liners, because they do the same thing to humans that kryptonite does to Superman. They take away our power, leave us weak and unable to use our strong and capable gifts. It’s time to get rid of them.Lori LeeEpisode 005 Forgiveness – Releasing dark emotion to step into the lightRumi said, “People want to be happy. Don’t keep serving them your pain.” Forgiveness can be one of the most difficult things we get to do. Stay tuned for why that serves us, not the offender. And how holding onto the dark days means that we keep serving up our pasts to everyone we come in contact with.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast.  I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it!

                   Last week we looked at personal narrative research project I did and what I discovered about how we engage with risk. This week we are going to look at some ideas on forgiveness.

                   At an emotional intelligence conference I attended mid-year 2016, I and a couple hundred other folks from around the country, found ourselves doing work to release old wounds, old stories that didn’t serve us, events of the past that had caused us to put up walls. It was a particularly vulnerable exercise where the lights were off and people were allowed, in fact encouraged, to scream out their anger, to vocally set free and release pains they had carried… always with them over the years. As I watched and listened and participated I wasn’t as wigged out as I thought I was going to be if, as my friends and I had discussed earlier, “there was screaming involved.”  In fact, what struck me so profoundly was how much pain everyone carries. Here was a large room filled with a hundred and seventy-something people from all across the country. Different races, religions, genders, states, socio-economic status, etc… but when the lights are down we are all the same – we are all carrying deep, deep pain. I was so struck by the human struggle taking place in the room when an idea suddenly became phenomenally clear to me, for the first time: Forgiveness is NOT about the other person– The one who hurt you. Forgiveness is about ourselves. When Christ said, in Matthew in the New Testament, that we are to forgive seventy times seven, I believe he was stating that there is never a time when it will be okay to burden our souls with pain, resentment, and hatred. There will never be a time when that will be good for us. No matter how many people do crappy things to us, or how many times a person hurts us, it is never enough for us to give them license to crush out our light and our love, which is exactly what carrying around anger and bitterness does to us. Let me repeat that… he was only stating that there is never a time when it will be okay to burden our souls with pain, resentment, and hatred. There will never be a time when that will be good for you. No matter how many people do crappy things to us, or how many times a person hurts us, it is never enough for us to give them license to crush out our light and our love. He doesn’t want us to have to be standing in that room screaming out the pain we have held onto. He doesn’t want us to carry around pain and anger and hatred that block out the light in our eyes and the lilt in our step.

                   Isn’t that a clarifying thought! All these years forgiveness was a difficult-to-implement concept that focused on people not being mad at each other and working through things that felt unfair. But this commandment, this practice of forgiving isn’t about allowing someone else to get off the hook. It has nothing to do with that. I know it feels like it, but it’s not about justice or mercy, (those things get worked out later) It’s a practice to free our own energy from the dark emotions that cripple and crush us right now. And even though sometimes it feels like forgiveness is letting the other person...]]>Rumi said, “People want to be happy. Don’t keep serving them your pain.” Forgiveness can be one of the most difficult things we get to do. Stay tuned for why that serves us, not the offender. And how holding onto the dark days means that we keep serving up our pasts to everyone we come in contact with.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast.  I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it!

                   Last week we looked at personal narrative research project I did and what I discovered about how we engage with risk. This week we are going to look at some ideas on forgiveness.

                   At an emotional intelligence conference I attended mid-year 2016, I and a couple hundred other folks from around the country, found ourselves doing work to release old wounds, old stories that didn’t serve us, events of the past that had caused us to put up walls. It was a particularly vulnerable exercise where the lights were off and people were allowed, in fact encouraged, to scream out their anger, to vocally set free and release pains they had carried… always with them over the years. As I watched and listened and participated I wasn’t as wigged out as I thought I was going to be if, as my friends and I had discussed earlier, “there was screaming involved.”  In fact, what struck me so profoundly was how much pain everyone carries. Here was a large room filled with a hundred and seventy-something people from all across the country. Different races, religions, genders, states, socio-economic status, etc… but when the lights are down we are all the same – we are all carrying deep, deep pain. I was so struck by the human struggle taking place in the room when an idea suddenly became phenomenally clear to me, for the first time: Forgiveness is NOT about the other person– The one who hurt you. Forgiveness is about ourselves. When Christ said, in Matthew in the New Testament, that we are to forgive seventy times seven, I believe he was stating that there is never a time when it will be okay to burden our souls with pain, resentment, and hatred. There will never be a time when that will be good for us. No matter how many people do crappy things to us, or how many times a person hurts us, it is never enough for us to give them license to crush out our light and our love, which is exactly what carrying around anger and bitterness does to us. Let me repeat that… he was only stating that there is never a time when it will be okay to burden our souls with pain, resentment, and hatred. There will never be a time when that will be good for you. No matter how many people do crappy things to us, or how many times a person hurts us, it is never enough for us to give them license to crush out our light and our love. He doesn’t want us to have to be standing in that room screaming out the pain we have held onto. He doesn’t want us to carry around pain and anger and hatred that block out the light in our eyes and the lilt in our step.

                   Isn’t that a clarifying thought! All these years forgiveness was a difficult-to-implement concept that focused on people not being mad at each other and working through things that felt unfair. But this commandment, this practice of forgiving isn’t about allowing someone else to get off the hook. It has nothing to do with that. I know it feels like it, but it’s not about justice or mercy, (those things get worked out later) It’s a practice to free our own energy from the dark emotions that cripple and crush us right now. And even though sometimes it feels like forgiveness is letting the other person off the hook, it’s really getting ourselves off the hook – the hook that’s going to keep us dangling from the end of a line, held by another person, never moving forward.

                   The Dalai Lama said of forgiveness, “It would be much more constructive if people tried to understand their supposed enemies. Learning to forgive is much more useful than merely picking up a stone and throwing it at the object of one’s anger, the more so when the provocation is extreme. For it is under the greatest adversity that there exists the greatest potential for doing good, both for oneself and others.

                   As I sat in that workshop and listened to the pains of all the unforgiven, I came to see the tragedy of not being able to let go of the old stories, the old grievances, the wounds that cut deep and never healed. Right in front of me was the thrashing of people wanting so badly to let their lights shine again in their own lives, and they were fighting for their lives. They were seeking release from the wounds that hadn’t healed so they could start to see with a brighter light and sprout wings.

                   I have this poster on my bookcase of Captian Jack Sparrow, and it says, “The problem is not the problem, the problem is your attitude about the problem. Do you understand?” Here’s a hard truth: It’s never what happens to us, it’s what we do with what happens to us. Now, I say hard truth, because sometimes it sucks to realize that we are responsible for making the best of a bad situation. On the other hand, it’s completely empowering, because with this “Stoics” mindset – you are always in control of your emotion and your life because no matter what comes your way you get to change your perspective so you can find the beauty, or the joy, or the learning, or the opportunity.

                   “Our deepest wounds are sacred spaces,” said  Katherine Woodward Thomas – I’ll bring her up again in a minute. I liked how she acknowledged the profound effect of our deep wounds. Our wounds are real – they wouldn’t hurt and wound if they weren’t hitting our vulnerable tender spaces. I find the verbiage of calling them “sacred spaces” as an acknowledgment of the role they play in our learning. They ARE spaces of learning. If you have experienced horrible things, and most of us have, we then have two choices – we are either crushed by the unfairness and the pain of the events, or we become a crazy warrior soul who fights for their life, in which case growth and progression is guaranteed. Those with the deepest sufferings are the warriors… really they have no choice: Fight and grow or be smothered by whatever event you can’t bear to let go of.

                   Those who hurt us have no control over whether or not we live a life of love and joy. That’s important to remember. We are the only ones who can decide that. Only you, only I, hold that power for ourselves. I saw this quote on-line yesterday: “Never put the key to your happiness in somebody else’s pocket.” While it seems counter intuitive – at least to me it always has, that forgiving someone else is done to save me; it is what it is. Take the key to your happiness out of the pocket of whoever hurt you, put it in your own pocket and start to shine again by breaking free of the anger, hate and pain. Easier said than done….I know.

                   Do you remember in Episode 1 when I spoke about reframing my victim story and finding a purpose, a meaning for the things that had happened in the past? It was this reframing of my story that allowed me to let go of feeling like a victim, even the little bit I held on to because I could see a potential purpose for my suffering. The wounds of my past didn’t change, I didn’t forget they ever happened. But now I could see that maybe there was either purpose behind them, or at least I could repurpose the events for a good cause. I can use my experiences to understand others better, to lift and carry, to inspire and to guide when given the opportunity. What greater use could we have for making it through the nightmares than to shine more brightly, to be more badass, to have a larger heart? Have you heard the song by Rascal Flatts “Bless the Broken Road?” If not, the words go: “God bless the broken road that led me straight to you.” A little country love song pointing out that he wouldn’t be where and who he is without that broken road he traveled, but it had purpose in leading him to the right place. Give it a listen – can be a bit of a tear jerker.

                    

                   There is a neat book called Calling in the One, by Katherine Woodward Thomas – this is her work I referred to earlier: In her book, she says, “Our unhealed wounds are invisible prisons capturing us with their iron bars just as surely as if we were locked inside cold gray, concrete walls. Sometimes it seems, no matter how hard we try to escape, that we will forever be prisoners of our own sad stories, doomed to repeat painful dynamics over and over and over again, in spite of our wishes to the contrary.”   She goes on later to discuss how, as much as we profess to hate our brokenness, that we often set up camp and put down roots and build our entire identities around our tales of woe. She then talks about the exact route that I found with my victim story – she acknowledges that we can’t actually get rid of our wounds, but we can find a way to make them meaningful, and when we do this,  THEN we can move on. Move forward. Let them go.

                   She recounts a story from the classic Man’s Search for Meaning –by Victor Frankl. Viktor was a prominent Jewish psychiatrist who survived the camps of Auschwitz and Dachau. Viktor talks of an elderly man who came to see him a couple years after his beloved wife had passed away. The man was distraught with grief and couldn’t move on with life because he was severely depressed. Viktor had been through the worst types of suffering, so he understood pain. He sat quietly and listened to the man pour out his grief and sorrow. When the man finished Dr. Frankl asked him just one questions: What would have happened if you had died first and your wife would have survived you?  Well, the man said, “for her this would have been terrible; how she would have suffered!” To this, Dr. Frankl replied, “You see, such a suffering has been spared her, and it was you who have spared her this suffering, to be sure, at the price that now you have to survive and mourn her.” The man was so moved by Dr. Frankl’s words that he simply stood up, shook his hand, and left, never to return. Dr. Frankl then writes, “In some way, suffering ceases to be suffering at the moment it finds a meaning.”

                   While these moments that break our hearts are a part of everyone’s life experience, we have the power of choice in how we deal with them. You are the badass hero of your story! You get to find your power. You get to take back the key to your happiness and put it in your own pocket. The struggle with that dragon of forgiveness is often a mighty struggle- I won’t pretend like it’s not. Finding purpose in your wounds can sometimes be more than a one-person job, like it was for me in episode one. Letting go doesn’t happen in a day, but sometimes it does.  For your own life, work with urgency toward this goal, so you can rise from the dark, let the heaviness flow from you, stand in the light and feel it warm your skin. That’s worth it.

                   And, back to Captain Jack Sparrow – “the problem is not the problem, the problem is your attitude about the problem.” All he’s saying here is that we assign meaning to the things that happen to us. The events in our lives are just events. The meaning these events have to us is created by us, through our lenses that we look through, our life perceptions. We control our perspective. If someone cuts you off in traffic you can decide if that person is a jackass or if his mother has just been hospitalized for a heart condition and he’s pushing his way through to be with her. If someone you don’t know yells at you, you can give him the benefit of the doubt that he’s had a really bad day, and empathize with him and cut him some slack because you too have had bad days, or you can confront and fight, or let the interaction ruin the rest of your day, or any number of potential responses, ….but the point is that you get to create your reality. You get to choose your response, even your interpretation.

                   There is that story about the man on the subway with his four children. His children ran all over, yelling and annoying other passengers. The father just sat there and let his children run around unchecked as he paid them no mind. When he was chastised by another rider he looked up, surprised, and then explained that they were just returning home from the hospital where their mother had just passed away and no one was dealing with it very well. I’m sure this story has been true in many cities, at many times. It illustrates how different a situation can be depending upon the lens it’s seen through. And, sense we often don’t have or know the whole story, it behooves us to give people the benefit of the doubt that everyone is doing the best they can. This perspective helps us not to create and carry around unnecessary irritation, but it’s also a reality check when bigger things happen 1. What’s the whole story here? 2. I get to choose the lens I see this event with.

                   Here’s another story. I work in real estate and a few years back I had a good friend who I was helping do a real estate deal. I had helped her purchase her first home, sell it, and we were working on the purchase of her second home. She had recently remarried after a difficult first marriage and divorce and I had been key in helping her to gain back her strength and step into her own power. We had been friends for years and I had gone out of my way to help her through a lot of difficult times. Well, as we worked on finding her a home in a city about a 45-minute drive away, we spent many days driving back and forth and she put in one offer after another on homes that she then backed out of. They waffled between building and she and her husband fought about how new the home should be, he wanted newer, but she was paying for it and she wanted it to be more affordable. Since we had been friends for years I joked that they shouldn’t build because building was hard on relationships and those two didn’t seem to be able to agree on anything. Well a few weeks down the road, and further along in the process, she was pulling out of another offer and asking if she could legally put in offers on multiple homes at the same time. I had a talk with her and we discussed ethics and consideration for the seller’s and I asked her to think seriously before we put in another offer on a home, as she needed to be serious about her desire to own that home. Well, this flipped a switch for her and she fired me, wrote a letter to my broker about why she should be let out of her contract, in which she literally made up a list of salacious comments about my work with her. The vast majority were straight up lies, while some were misunderstandings like my comment to her earlier about suggesting they not try to build a home together. This was infuriating to me. Here was a person, a friend whom I had done a great deal for over the years, a friend whom I had put in hours, days, weeks into helping them with their home purchase and here she was attempting to besmirch my reputation, attempting to provide no compensation for the time I had professionally spent helping their family, and worse outright attacking me in what was a very unexpected way. To say that I was taken aback was an understatement. For weeks I was shocked and for months I was angry. Her betrayal was so unexpected and so offensive, and to me, I could find no justification for it. As I’ve tried to look at this through other various lenses, I have come up with some theories – when she and I first met she was a woman with NO power. She was weak and victimized and her ex-husband was running over her everyday in every way. She was still mothering his children (not hers) and she was fixing his meals because she didn’t want to make him angry. He was pushy and confrontational, and she was a wilting flower. Over the years she found her strength and her voice. I’ve seen this happen more than once, where people who have not had a voice and then they take up their power, they swing to the far left. She went from having no voice to being an unreasonable bitch. She hadn’t found the in between yet. I think she was also embarrassed that I had seen her and her new husband, the supposed and sought after happily-ever-after, fighting so often as she rode over him repeatedly. While I was an indirect party to these parts of her life, this event, that was so unexpected and unrealistic to me, when seen through these potential lenses, at least sheds some light on her actions. Forgiveness to me in this situation is a freeing of the unexpected betrayal I felt by her. She wrote later and said she missed me and was sorry – exactly like that, 2 short lines. To which I so badly wanted to write a two-page tirade. But I did not. I let her go down her path, wherever that may take her and wish her the best on her journey as she figures out her middle ground of having her power and being able to maintain healthy relationships at the same time. I’m not suggesting this was the only course or the correct course; I’m sharing my chosen course and what it meant to me. Forgiveness doesn’t mean that we welcome back the perpetrators into our lives. In fact, often times that would be very unwise, but it does mean that we don’t wish them a tortured death, and we let them move on down their path while we move on down our path with a lighter load. I’ll admit, it took me time. Forgiveness is always a process for me, but I’m understanding it better and better, and that’s called growth.

                   The key to your happiness is in your own pocket, and if you’ve left it in someone else’s pocket, it’s time to go get it back. If you take anything from today’s episode, remember this – there is never a time when it’s okay for us to let someone else crush the light out of us. This is why we forgive – to be whole, to retain our light, to move forward and past the dragons (episode 2) and on to the happily ever after!

                   Your challenge for this week is to find something you are holding onto in your heart – someone you haven’t forgiven, some pain that needs to be released. Start with just one, and start the process of taking the key of your happiness out of their pocket. Find a purpose or a lesson learned from your experience. Try looking at it through different lenses in an attempt to understand their perspective. Often this process – finding a meaning for your experience, a lesson you can take from it, and then considering the perspective of the other, can help you to honor those sacred spaces that are our wounds, and wash out any bitter infection that still festers.

                   On that delicious visual, have a great week out there considering your stories, and creating new ones. See you next week.

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1327Wed, 19 Oct 2016 15:34:17 -070022:42falsefullOur deepest wounds are sacred spaces. They are the spaces for learning and letting go. Forgiveness is about taking the key of our happiness out of another's pocket and freeing ourselves from the dark emotions that block our lights from shining on a daily basis. Let's talk about it.Lori LeeEpisode 004 What Stories Taught Me About RiskTitle: What Stories Taught me about Risk

                   Intro: Lezlie Silko said, “I will tell you something about stories…they aren’t just entertainment. Don’t be fooled. They are all we have.” We all have stories. We all tell stories. If I told you how I fell 100 feet off a rock climb, you’d start thinking of your own stories, one you’d like to tell in response. Maybe a bigger/better, or someone you know did X. It’s part of our conversation…how we relate to each other. But stories are so much more – tune in today for the unexpected discovery I made while studying the stories of hikers, bikers, skiers and rock climbers. An insight into how we all manage risk!

                   s

                   I conducted 16 interviews of people who participate regularly in outdoor recreation – human-powered sports in wild places such as mountains, rivers, and deserts. The interviewees consisted of eight men and eight women between the ages of 22-75 years old. Their sports of choice included: mountaineering, road biking, mountain biking, skiing, snowboarding, SUP (stand up paddle boarding), white water kayaking, desert backpacking, and river rafting. Each shared personal stories of exploits, that I then structurally analyzed for risk using Labov and Walestsy’s structural analysis model. What that means, in a nutshell, is that these cool guys – Labov and Walestsy, broke down the personal narrative and found a pattern in the way stories were told. By breaking the stories into the parts L&W defined, you can evaluate different structural aspects of a story. So let me share an example so this will make sense–

                   Example Story from Alex, one of the outdoor recreationalists that was a part of this study

                   He said, and I’m quoting word for word, “ I was on a climb for charity, a mountain climb, I’m not a mountain climber, but we were climbing a mountain in Chile called Aconcagua. And, a, it was really, really, really, really, really really cold, like 40 below. Now this is the opening section of the story that L&W call the ( ORIENTATION). The story goes on:  And, on the day before the summit day I was feeling extraordinarily strong and then all of the sudden lost feeling in my feet and literally couldn’t walk. I mean I absolutely couldn’t do it.  This is the second section of the story that L&W call (COMPLICATING ACTION). The story goes on:  It was a small group and so it was a choice, let’s leave Alex and we’re going to go push for the summit. And they got me all set up. My friend Eric decided he was going to stay with me, long time friend, and the short part of the story is, that in 40 below temps, he… we said, let’s give it a shot and see if I can warm your feet up. We didn’t think there was necessarily something wrong, they had just gotten so frozen they had lost circulation. This section is the section L&W call the (EVALUATION): And so, he put my feet under his jacket and into his armpits… … and 10 minutes later after him screaming in pain about how cold it was, I got feeling back and we went for the summit. This is what L&W call the (RESOLUTION).

                   I said:  Not only did you summit, but you saved your feet!

                   Alex: I’m not sure. I think it would have… like circulation would have ….. ya, he did a lot of wonderful things for me with that armpit moment… That last final statement is what L&W call a (CODA)

                   So, why does this breakdown matter? The reason it matters, in this case, was that after I had collected all their stories, broken them into L&W’s structural parts, the result of my analysis brought 2 things to the forefront: 1. Risk was the roving master and was allowed in any and all parts of the stories – in everything from the orientation to the coda – risk could show up anywhere in this group’s stories. And 2. Risk received little fanfare in the narratives and was often quickly passed over.

                   Now, The scattered, but certain nature of risk within the narratives show that risk...]]>Title: What Stories Taught me about Risk

                   Intro: Lezlie Silko said, “I will tell you something about stories…they aren’t just entertainment. Don’t be fooled. They are all we have.” We all have stories. We all tell stories. If I told you how I fell 100 feet off a rock climb, you’d start thinking of your own stories, one you’d like to tell in response. Maybe a bigger/better, or someone you know did X. It’s part of our conversation…how we relate to each other. But stories are so much more – tune in today for the unexpected discovery I made while studying the stories of hikers, bikers, skiers and rock climbers. An insight into how we all manage risk!

                   s

                   I conducted 16 interviews of people who participate regularly in outdoor recreation – human-powered sports in wild places such as mountains, rivers, and deserts. The interviewees consisted of eight men and eight women between the ages of 22-75 years old. Their sports of choice included: mountaineering, road biking, mountain biking, skiing, snowboarding, SUP (stand up paddle boarding), white water kayaking, desert backpacking, and river rafting. Each shared personal stories of exploits, that I then structurally analyzed for risk using Labov and Walestsy’s structural analysis model. What that means, in a nutshell, is that these cool guys – Labov and Walestsy, broke down the personal narrative and found a pattern in the way stories were told. By breaking the stories into the parts L&W defined, you can evaluate different structural aspects of a story. So let me share an example so this will make sense–

                   Example Story from Alex, one of the outdoor recreationalists that was a part of this study

                   He said, and I’m quoting word for word, “ I was on a climb for charity, a mountain climb, I’m not a mountain climber, but we were climbing a mountain in Chile called Aconcagua. And, a, it was really, really, really, really, really really cold, like 40 below. Now this is the opening section of the story that L&W call the ( ORIENTATION). The story goes on:  And, on the day before the summit day I was feeling extraordinarily strong and then all of the sudden lost feeling in my feet and literally couldn’t walk. I mean I absolutely couldn’t do it.  This is the second section of the story that L&W call (COMPLICATING ACTION). The story goes on:  It was a small group and so it was a choice, let’s leave Alex and we’re going to go push for the summit. And they got me all set up. My friend Eric decided he was going to stay with me, long time friend, and the short part of the story is, that in 40 below temps, he… we said, let’s give it a shot and see if I can warm your feet up. We didn’t think there was necessarily something wrong, they had just gotten so frozen they had lost circulation. This section is the section L&W call the (EVALUATION): And so, he put my feet under his jacket and into his armpits… … and 10 minutes later after him screaming in pain about how cold it was, I got feeling back and we went for the summit. This is what L&W call the (RESOLUTION).

                   I said:  Not only did you summit, but you saved your feet!

                   Alex: I’m not sure. I think it would have… like circulation would have ….. ya, he did a lot of wonderful things for me with that armpit moment… That last final statement is what L&W call a (CODA)

                   So, why does this breakdown matter? The reason it matters, in this case, was that after I had collected all their stories, broken them into L&W’s structural parts, the result of my analysis brought 2 things to the forefront: 1. Risk was the roving master and was allowed in any and all parts of the stories – in everything from the orientation to the coda – risk could show up anywhere in this group’s stories. And 2. Risk received little fanfare in the narratives and was often quickly passed over.

                   Now, The scattered, but certain nature of risk within the narratives show that risk plays an integral role in the stories of the outdoor recreation folk group, and WE can clearly identify that the activities these recreationalist participate in involve danger and potential injury or death, and yet, these participants  all claimed they were NOT risk takers, despite the fact that they climbed mountains over 22,000 feet in elevation, backpacked multi-day trips across arid deserts relying only on water within the landscape, skied backcountry icy mountain tops on skis without edges, white water kayaked, and rock climbed 1200 foot pinnacles– to stand on a pizza-box size rock in utter darkness, etc. Despite this they made such claims as: “I’m not a huge risk taker.” or  “I’m a snowboarder and a mountain biker, but I’m very careful about what I do out on those things.” or  “It didn’t feel risky. It felt really safe.”  “I don’t think I would do things that are risky or dangerous, I’m pretty reserved.”—Brittany.  “I don’t think climbing is any more risky than walking to the grocery store.” –Roland  “I’m not a real physical risk taker.” –Tim.

                   The question then begs: what defines risk for these individuals, and what steps are taken to alleviate risk to the point that these clearly dangerous undertakings are no longer considered dangerous by those who choose to participate in them?

                   Now this insight isn’t about stories, it’s about how humans deal with risk – but the wonderful, powerful thing is that this information was derived from a starting point of stories. Another situation where we can come to understand the human condition in direct and indirect ways – all through story. So let’s talk about the results:

                   Risk Identification

                   Though these type of sports often seem extremely risky to the uninvolved on-looker, the participants engage in 2 steps to essentially manage the risk, the first is a quick and often instinctual calculation regarding a number of criteria in order to determine risk potential. Each person chooses their own variety of issues to analyze. Let me tell you about the 6 that I identified with this study: So when someone asks one of these skiers, hikers, mountain climbers if they want to do a certain climb, kayak a certain river, etc. the first thing they do is quickly go through a mental process of checking off the following 6 items:

                   Play through Scenarios: One tool for risk assessment was to play through a mental movie of possible scenarios and outcomes to determine whether the reward was worth the potential harm. They also gauged, in their scenarios, how the event had to play out for safety, which brings me to…

                   How Far Removed is the Risk: If a number of mistakes can be made on a given move and the participant still has a chance for success without harm or death, then the risk is more likely to be considered acceptable. If harm is only one move away, most, who used this evaluation tool, indicated they would not engage. For example, if riding a narrow section of trail on a mountain bike, next to a 100-foot drop off, one mistake can mean death. If, on the other hand, the trail is wide enough that if a mistake is made, falling off is not certain, then the risk is more than one move away and may be acceptable.

                   Experience of Others: Risk is gauged by the experiences and success or failure of others. For example, when Alex was discussing how he made his decision to move ahead with the climb of Aconcagua, one of the tallest mountains in the world, part of his process of evaluation was to see how many deaths had occurred on the mountain in the past year.  Alli said, “It’s like you can break your hand or your clavicle, but you don’t really hear about people dying (on a mountain bike).”  Talking with other people was often mentioned as a way to gauge risk as well. What experience had others had doing this offered route?

                   Scouting Conditions and Assessing Technicality: Scouting conditions is an attempt to evaluate risk potential established by the terrain and whether or not they have the skill required for success. For a river rafter or kayaker it is walking the river and assessing the flow and pull of the water, the location of rocks, length of drop off and speed of the water. For climbing a wall it may include looking for anchors, ledges, hand holds, loose rock. For backcountry skiing it may include checking avalanche conditions, looking for terrain traps and checking snow conditions. Incremental Progression: How far is this beyond my skill level? Multiple interviewees discussed the idea of incremental learning. In order to progress in the sport, one must gain skills they don’t currently have, but making big jumps from one skill level to the next possesses too much risk. Risks are acceptable if taken incrementally. For example, one interviewee said, “… how I approach that is taking on class 2 (rapids), then class 3, 4, then 5….”

                   Control: For those to whom control is an issue, they judged risk according to how much control they would retain in the situation, and how much was left to some other entity, even if that entity was gravity. Are they in control or is something else?

                   After they had gauged their situation in regard to these 6 items, they then naturally went through a process called Risk Alleviation.

                   Basically, after risk has been identified and assessed, the interviewees each had certain steps they plugged in, to further reduce risk. This final step determines whether or not the participant will engage in the sport or route. This cognitive equation takes place, sometimes in a matter of minutes, but sometimes much longer if the danger or risk is higher. There are 8 of these

                   The first is:

                   Experience: Had they attempted this activity at this level before? Did they have the experience to feel confident that they could succeed without injury? As discussed in Lee Davidson’s study “The Calculable and the Incalculable: Narratives of Safety and Danger in the Mountains,” the mountaineers in his study indicated that one of the ways for survival was to survive the initial phase of participation in the sport. In other words, if you can stay alive through your introduction to the sport, when you have the least amount of experience, then you can gain the experience needed, “learn from one’s mistakes,” and move past it. Once one has enough of their own experience, they can compare future situations with past situations. This was occasionally referred to as “judgment”.

                   Confidence: One interviewee put it this way, “I think risk is a very personal thing, and I think a lot of risks come from the mental state that you’re in. So, being confident and comfortable in what you are doing eliminates a huge amount of risk.” In other words: Is your head in the game?

                   Skill: Skill is defined as competent excellence in performance. Each of the sports mentioned require a specific set of skills to navigate the sport successfully. Possessing those skills lowers the risk of injury or death. Beth said, “I ski things that maybe someone else would never ski because that would be scary and you could break a leg, but I feel I’m not going to break a leg because I know what I’m doing.”

                   Preparation: Limiting risk can be done by prior preparation. Tim explains, “Part of the draw is that they (the deserts) can be very unforgiving…where if you don’t have your t’s crossed and your i’s dotted in terms of preparation, you could find yourself in real big trouble real quick.”  In other words, In the world of outdoor recreation preparation can mean the difference between life and death.

                   Go With Others:  Safety in numbers.  Those who mentioned this felt that recreating with partners meant that if there were trouble, multiple participants would mean help for the injured or someone to go for help, or that going with others who had been there/done that provided insight, experience, and safety.

                   Gear/Safety Equipment: In the words of Kara, “If something can save your life, why wouldn’t you wear it?”  Specifically, items like harnesses, avalanche beacons, avalanche backpacks, safe ropes, etc. were mentioned. The need to double check safety gear for tight knots and correct usage was also noted.

                   Knowledge: Two of the most experienced of those interviewed, one male, one female, both mentioned knowledge as a key to risk reduction.  Roland explained it like this, “…another piece of eliminating risk is making sure that you are doing everything correctly, that all your knots are done correctly…If you’re going to be trad climbing, you know how to place gear correctly, you know how to build anchors….”

                   Ego: Roland also noted the importance of not letting ego push you to make unwise choices that increase risk. He said, “There have been a lot of climbs and pitches that I haven’t felt good about, or you know, a storm is coming in, or the sun is setting and you’re not prepared for it, and we’ve said, “OK, we are backing off.” We’ve put our ego aside and said, “We’re not getting on top of this today, and we’ll be alive to do it tomorrow.”

                   Risk vs. Reward

                   For each recreationalist the rewards they receive from participation in their chosen activities vary. The recreationalists I interviewed unequivocally assured me that their purpose in pursuing these activities did not center around risk. Rather, risk was a necessary part of the process to be navigated, but not the attraction. The things they sought were: the challenge of the sport, the opportunity to connect with the landscape, the release from urban life, healing and rejuvenation, fun, the social connection it gives them with others, a feeling of accomplishment, to conquer their own fears, to learn to deal with challenges, build character, as a tool for keeping them present, to get to know their body, exercise, to learn new things, spiritual connection, and to keep life in perspective. Another research study done of the narratives of 22 New Zealand mountaineers found the same thing. “…While they may have to deal with danger and stress in pursuing their passion, they are not reckless, foolhardy, or adrenaline junkies. Rather, they describe themselves as typically calm, sensible, and analytical in their approach to the potential dangers of climbing.”   Zucherman, in his article, Sensation Seeking and Risky Behavior, notes, “the riskiness of sports is not the sole or even the main feature attracting sensation seekers” (p 91). And, Roberti concludes that “Instead, sensation seekers are believed to be willing to take risks in order to have rewarding experiences; rather than risk being the source of arousal, sensation seekers most actively try to reduce it.” My interviewees made this point very clear. These sports, to the participants, are life affirming rather than death defying.

                   CONCLUSION

                   Personal narratives open the windows to the soul of any group. In this case they have led to insights that have allowed me to logically define an individualized process that participants in this group go through in order to remove or reduce risk perception to a space of manageability. So here is the exciting and more widely applicable part – This process, I suspect, is similar, for other groups who encounter risk of other types: relationship risks, economic risks, social risks, political risks, etc. And with this understanding we have gained an  insight into ourselves and others as we need to predetermine where humans dare to go and under what conditions they will engage for their highest chance of happily ever after in their own stories. If we are contemplating a risky move of any time, we can probably watch ourselves go through this process, and with more awareness and understanding of it, maybe even control it, finding additional risk reduction tools? I loved this particular research project because I had no idea what I would find. And what I found was so fascinating. The next time you see someone doing something risky, you can rest assured they have identified the risks, alleviated what they could, and managed them before they began (except for the few folks out there who are disconnected from their self-preservation instinct.) When you see a skateboarder try to slide the rail, he has probably instinctually considered his skill set, put on safety gear, evaluated other’s experiences with the attempt, taken stock of his own experience, and considered the likelihood of his own injury or death. If he feels like he can manage the risk involved, he then proceeds to give it a try. This doesn’t always work out well, as the doctors and nurses in the ER room know, but it’s a process that we use to manage our risky and dangerous choices. Are you fascinated? I am!

                   Next time you think about whether you should ask out the great looking girl in the coffee line at Starbucks, watch your mind go through the risk identification and alleviation processes. See where you get stuck, and decide if the story you’re telling yourself is fact or fiction and if you should push past it! Can you alleviate one more game stopper so you can move forward?

                   Have fun out there telling your stories this week. See you next week on Love Your Story podcast.

                    

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1323Wed, 12 Oct 2016 15:00:05 -070021:44falsefullFrom the first recorded adventure tales of Marco Polo, stories of adventure, challenge and discovery have been used to entertain, to define people, to relive events and share experiences. For adventurers today it is no different. And, sometimes, what the stories tell us about ourselves is even more interesting than the stories themselves. Follow me on this adventure, as we start with the stories of adventurers to unmask risk and see what lies beneath.Lori LeeEpisode 003 BUSINESS – Calling All Leaders: Are you using story as a tool?Intro: Do you own a business, lead a team, manage a family? If so, today’s podcast is going to blow your socks off! How you can use stories to align everyone in the same vision of who you are and what you stand for? How you can use stories to define your brand and your values. Now you can lead with the most enjoyable medium in the human quiver of communication! Stories!

                   Body: Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to us it.

                   This month has been a fun and exciting launch for the Love Your Story podcast because each episode has focused on different aspects of the power of stories. In episode one we discussed how stories are fluid creatures and can be reframed to serve us better. In episode two we became the hero of our own stories and talked about the heroes journey. This week we are going to be looking at some absolutely amazing story ideas for leaders. Next week we’ll be looking at one of the funnest research projects I have done, and discuss how story revealed an amazing insight into how we can manage risk.

                   So, let’s jump right in.

                   If you lead a company, a team – of any type: business, sports, charity; or if you have a family that you lead, you’re going to love today’s insights. As I talk about these ideas, apply them to you – to the group you lead, and I’d love for you to jump on-line to loveyourstorypodcast.com and share with us how you plan to use today’s information in leading your team to success.

                   A vast majority of the stories that we share with each other are shared very informally. Talking with the guy in the cubical next to you, or shooting the breeze with a friend at the dog park. The water cooler stories happen all day every day. It’s part of the ritual of exchange between people as we live moment to moment. But once you understand the power of the story you can start to use them deliberately, with purpose. You can use story to accomplish goals and achieve clearer vision among groups.

                   If you’re a leader of any group of people you know the importance of bringing new tools to your leadership role. You know that leading others is no small task. How do you communicate and create a sense of cohesiveness? How do you create a group vision where everyone is on board? How do you lead and direct your charges in a way that creates clarity, not confusion? Not only will you be able to make your vision clearer, you will also keep the interest of your team members when you’re done with today’s podcast, because we all prefer to hear a story over looking at a page of statistics, or  a well-meant lecture.

                   The first type of story I want to talk about is the Identity Story! Who is your team and what does it mean to be a member of your team or family? How did you start? These stories are important because it’s the foundation of who you are! This step is often overlooked with the assumption that everyone ‘gets it.’ But if time isn’t allotted to defining this for the team mates, then you have a group of people who are all drawing their own conclusions. These days as new college graduates are heading into the work force, often they want a greater cause – not just a paycheck. They want meaning and purpose behind the company they chose to work for. Being clear on your identity as an employer, a family, a group or organization is keep to stability within the ranks. So we start with origin stories.

                   These origin stories are fodder for identity!– as a leader, you get to provide this for your people. How did your family start – how did mom and dad meet? How did your team come together? How did...]]>Intro: Do you own a business, lead a team, manage a family? If so, today’s podcast is going to blow your socks off! How you can use stories to align everyone in the same vision of who you are and what you stand for? How you can use stories to define your brand and your values. Now you can lead with the most enjoyable medium in the human quiver of communication! Stories!

                   Body: Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to us it.

                   This month has been a fun and exciting launch for the Love Your Story podcast because each episode has focused on different aspects of the power of stories. In episode one we discussed how stories are fluid creatures and can be reframed to serve us better. In episode two we became the hero of our own stories and talked about the heroes journey. This week we are going to be looking at some absolutely amazing story ideas for leaders. Next week we’ll be looking at one of the funnest research projects I have done, and discuss how story revealed an amazing insight into how we can manage risk.

                   So, let’s jump right in.

                   If you lead a company, a team – of any type: business, sports, charity; or if you have a family that you lead, you’re going to love today’s insights. As I talk about these ideas, apply them to you – to the group you lead, and I’d love for you to jump on-line to loveyourstorypodcast.com and share with us how you plan to use today’s information in leading your team to success.

                   A vast majority of the stories that we share with each other are shared very informally. Talking with the guy in the cubical next to you, or shooting the breeze with a friend at the dog park. The water cooler stories happen all day every day. It’s part of the ritual of exchange between people as we live moment to moment. But once you understand the power of the story you can start to use them deliberately, with purpose. You can use story to accomplish goals and achieve clearer vision among groups.

                   If you’re a leader of any group of people you know the importance of bringing new tools to your leadership role. You know that leading others is no small task. How do you communicate and create a sense of cohesiveness? How do you create a group vision where everyone is on board? How do you lead and direct your charges in a way that creates clarity, not confusion? Not only will you be able to make your vision clearer, you will also keep the interest of your team members when you’re done with today’s podcast, because we all prefer to hear a story over looking at a page of statistics, or  a well-meant lecture.

                   The first type of story I want to talk about is the Identity Story! Who is your team and what does it mean to be a member of your team or family? How did you start? These stories are important because it’s the foundation of who you are! This step is often overlooked with the assumption that everyone ‘gets it.’ But if time isn’t allotted to defining this for the team mates, then you have a group of people who are all drawing their own conclusions. These days as new college graduates are heading into the work force, often they want a greater cause – not just a paycheck. They want meaning and purpose behind the company they chose to work for. Being clear on your identity as an employer, a family, a group or organization is keep to stability within the ranks. So we start with origin stories.

                   These origin stories are fodder for identity!– as a leader, you get to provide this for your people. How did your family start – how did mom and dad meet? How did your team come together? How did your business begin? I’m going to borrow some examples from the book Circle of the 9 Muses by David Hutchens.

                   The year was 1876 and Thomas Edison opened a laboratory in Menlo Park, NJ. Out of that laboratory was to come one of the greatest inventions of the age. A light bulb. After a merger in 1892, he called his new organization General Electric. On their website, after telling this story in more detail, they say: Today, that same spirit of innovation and discovery is still a part of everything we do.

                   General Electric is using their origin story to communicate a clear picture of who they are, what they stand for, and to provide a marketing vision that exemplifies the way they want to be seen. All with a simple story, they encapsulate that they are a company of innovation and discovery. How much more memorable is that than the statement “We are a company of innovation and discovery?”

                   Once you discover what you identity story is – the one you want to use to define your group – you have stepped onto the path of a multi-pronged solution. The identity story not only defines you to your team members, it also defines you to your customers, clients, and competitors. If this story is put into marketing, retold at meetings, and used as a tool, pretty soon everyone is clear on what you are and what you stand for. I want to point out that the employee or group member understanding is not to be under estimated here. When everyone is on the same page and has a clear vision of what they are working for – the sense of unity and forward progress, with like minds, blows the roof off. If this is missing in your group, start looking for your identity story.

                   What might a family origin story look like? My mom and dad met in a small Idaho farm town in the middle of nowhere. Mom had arrived for a summer get-away with her uncle, between semesters at college, and dad saw her at a church event. After a day working out on the farm a cute girl was a welcome distraction. A spark was struck and almost 50 years later they have 6 kids, and 30 grandkids. My dad has 12 brothers and sisters, and that side of the family is hundreds strong when you start counting kids, grandkids, even great grandkids. We have a heritage of family, love of God and hard work; and we all know it.

                   Your story will be completely different. That’s the wonder of the stories of our lives – so much color and variety, but thinking about which stories you may want to use to define your family or your team, is part of the process. Maybe the origin story is sketchy at best. If the origin story is not working for you, consider the next type

                   The next story I like is called a Value Story. Does your organization pride itself, yea market itself, as being environmentally friendly? Do you stand behind the quality of your product, or pride yourself on your customer service? Are you the company with the latest and greatest – cutting edge technology, or the top fashions as soon as they walk off the runway? This is another fun one! Find the stories within your company and team that show you living up to these values. Do you remember that old story of Nordstrom taking a return for a tire because a customer insisted they had bought it there and Nordstrom had a no questions asked return policy? Well, Nordstroms doesn’t sell tires, but the story goes that they took the return because the customer was #1. Whether or not it’s true, the story built trust in Nordstrom’s return policy. It showed excellent customer service and spread, as stories do, to accomplish an entirely organic type of marketing.

                   Are you a family that prides itself on community service and helping those around you? Do you have a fun family story or two that shows your family in action? Sharing and retelling these stories to one another start to define values you’d like to see in your family. Kids love stories, kids get stories, kids understand stories better than lectures!

                   My father has a story where he was loading bales of hay after an early fall frost, and as a youth, he was excited that they would get more money for the load because of the water in the hay. When he mentioned this to his father, Grandpa looked at him and said, “They aren’t paying for water, they are paying for hay.” This one statement was a lesson in honesty that my dad never forgot. He shares the story occasionally, long after grandpa’s death, but it’s a story that defines family value.

                   the story you get to choose to use is one where you or other members of the team were at their best! A time when George Washington cut down the apple tree but chose not to lie. Retelling your family’s version of the rise-above story and using it as a definition for future actions is a way to clearly show what your family or team stands for.

                   Another example from Hutchen’s book was a 2012 customer service call that lasted 10 hours. The customer called to order a pair of Ugg boots from Zappos but in the conversation, the service rep discovered that the customer was about to relocate to the Las Vegas area, where Zappos is located. They spent 10 hours exploring neighborhoods and other details of life in Vegas. At the end of the call, the customer purchased a pair of Ugg boots. Zappos viewed the incident as an employee following protocol – and this was another experience of customer service. The story has proven to be useful in showing the extent to which Zappos will go to serve their customers—for both their employees, as well as their clients. No amount of advertising or print copy can do what a story does.

                   So, as a leader you want to be clear about the identity of your group – who you are – IDENTITY/ORIGIN STORIES! And, you want to be clear on what you stand for – which values define your actions and efforts – VALUE STORIES. And, you want to be clear on where you are going. This third story opportunity is called VISION STORIES.

                   What do you see for your team, group or company? What do you want to accomplish – what’s your desired future? Vision statements are popular in business and life coaching. They tell what the end goal is – but you’ve heard the popular adage – Show Don’t Tell – A story allows you to show your vision so you can better guide your group toward it. Vision stories are a little more complex because they haven’t happened yet. But here are 3 approaches you can use to determine yours:

                   1. Sometimes you can steal a story from another successful company, organization or family and use it as an example of where you want your team to go. What you see for your team. Stories of other’s successes that you want your team to emulate.

                   
                   

                    

                   For example, I have a Realtor friend who was just starting out in the business. He wanted to make real estate a profitable career, so he looked at the stories of how other highly successful Realtors had developed their businesses. He found a Realtor who was a top performer and who was willing to share his story of rags to riches – the struggle to the top. It was a realistic tale of success and failures with a grand ending. It provided a clear road map and vision for this man and he used this man’s story as his vision for where he wanted to be and how to keep pushing through the barriers as they showed up, just as this man had done in his story.

                    

                   2. Stories from the past that share the vision of where you want to go;

                   
                   

                    

                   Let’s say you’re a small group leader and you can envision your group coming up with the winning ad campaign the company will chose. Create this story. What does it look like? How does it happen? Do you have a story from the past where the team pulled together to win the account and you can hold this vision of team work up as an example? The speech might sound something like this: “Last year when we worked on the Johnson and Franks account, we came together as a team. Remember when Jonah and Elizabeth stayed late and ran into the janitor every night that week and were on friendly speaking terms. And remember how the janitor shared the story about his kids having that condiment fight with the neighbors and it gave us that great idea that we created the winning campaign around!” Team work, ingenuity, outside the box sourcing! This is where we are headed again.

                   This quick little story shows people working hard, looking outside the box for solutions, and winning the prize.

                    

                   3. Finally – there are stories you create for your vision for the future.

                   
                   

                   Craft these stories in as much detail as possible and get the team involved in creating the story. A story circle works great for this — then share the story repeatedly! It takes ideas and makes them real!

                   Leaders change the world! Leaders lead those who change the world. And stories, the world’s oldest form of sharing, connecting, communicating ideas, intent, identity, warning,…are an often underutilized tool. But now that you know – you can begin to use story, on purpose, with intention and you become influential on a whole new level – a strategic leader with a new set of tools to bring to the table.

                   Have fun using your new skill set, and telling your stories this week. We’ll see you next week on Love Your Story podcast. Stop by the website and share your stories with us.

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1246Wed, 28 Sep 2016 18:04:58 -070017:23falsefullStory can be used on purpose! It's a powerful tool that everyone understands. When used appropriately it can define where you've been, what you stand for, and where you are going; all in a language that everyone gets and enjoys.Lori LeeEpisode 002 You ARE the Hero of Your StoryIntro: In the Hobbit – subtitled “An Unexpected Journey” one of the favorite lines is: “It’s a dangerous business walking out one’s front door.”

                   In the hero’s journey one must always leave the known, the comfortable, the normal – comfort zone be damned, this is where the possibility begins. This is where adventure and growth happen.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   As we discussed last week, the secret is that the same story has a hundred different ways it can be told. Perspective, lenses, motive, they all change up the tale. Do you decide to see the experience from a space of opportunity? From a space of blessing? Are you focused on what went wrong and who is to blame, or on the things you finally learned from having walked that path – willingly or not? Do you see it from a space of abundance, hope, and responsibility? You get to decide. Look at both. Tell both to yourself. Which one serves our highest self? Which one builds internal space and voices that buoy you and give you power? What story do you tell?

                   In the Hobbit, Gandalf has a conversation with Bilbo. It goes something like this:

                   Gandalf: I am looking for someone to share in an adventure that I am arranging, and it’s very difficult to find anyone.

                   Bilbo: I should think so—in these parts! We are plain quiet folk and have no use for adventures. Nasty disturbing uncomfortable things! Make you late for dinner! I can’t think what anybody sees in them …

                   Gandalf:  You’ll have a tale or two to tell when you come back

                   Bilbo:  You can promise that I’ll come back?”

                   Gandalf:  No. And if you do, you will not be the same

                   Does this exchange create any amount of excitement in you? It does in me. The ante has been upped. The danger is real. The choice is there to be made. This is where living big, or living small begins – in the choices.

                   When Bilbo makes the gigantic leap of faith and steps out, placing his foot on the dusty hobbit path that will lead him away from everything he knows, Gandalf says, “Home is now behind you, the world is ahead.”

                   Mythical stories always have a hero. This main character is on a journey. Joseph Campbell termed it the “hero’s journey” and it can be broken down into very specific parts. Within the story, there is a hero, a loss or obstacle that must be overcome – a journey that will test the hero. Along the route, there are often animals, magic, other people to help or give clues, but the hero has to conquer his challenge if he wishes to come out the other side of the story with the title of hero, where he then collects the kingdom and reward. While it’s true that the journey is fraught with danger, disappointment, often initial failure or setbacks, it is also true that the big picture is about the hero learning, growing and proving worthy of the challenge and the reward. Let’s bring this home and I’ll state the obvious: You are the hero of YOUR story.

                   This is a fun perspective. This is a perspective that can help you stand back up when you’ve been leveled. It’s a perspective that can remind you who you truly are no matter what dragon you’re facing. It’s a perspective that can help you create the story you want. So, the parts of the hero story that are so exciting in the movies, in the books, in the theater, are the parts that we hate most in real life. No one likes the loneliness of waiting for Prince Charming, or the depressing sleep brought on by a poison apple, or the blood loss when the unexpected...]]>Intro: In the Hobbit – subtitled “An Unexpected Journey” one of the favorite lines is: “It’s a dangerous business walking out one’s front door.”

                   In the hero’s journey one must always leave the known, the comfortable, the normal – comfort zone be damned, this is where the possibility begins. This is where adventure and growth happen.

                   Stories are our lives in language. Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   As we discussed last week, the secret is that the same story has a hundred different ways it can be told. Perspective, lenses, motive, they all change up the tale. Do you decide to see the experience from a space of opportunity? From a space of blessing? Are you focused on what went wrong and who is to blame, or on the things you finally learned from having walked that path – willingly or not? Do you see it from a space of abundance, hope, and responsibility? You get to decide. Look at both. Tell both to yourself. Which one serves our highest self? Which one builds internal space and voices that buoy you and give you power? What story do you tell?

                   In the Hobbit, Gandalf has a conversation with Bilbo. It goes something like this:

                   Gandalf: I am looking for someone to share in an adventure that I am arranging, and it’s very difficult to find anyone.

                   Bilbo: I should think so—in these parts! We are plain quiet folk and have no use for adventures. Nasty disturbing uncomfortable things! Make you late for dinner! I can’t think what anybody sees in them …

                   Gandalf:  You’ll have a tale or two to tell when you come back

                   Bilbo:  You can promise that I’ll come back?”

                   Gandalf:  No. And if you do, you will not be the same

                   Does this exchange create any amount of excitement in you? It does in me. The ante has been upped. The danger is real. The choice is there to be made. This is where living big, or living small begins – in the choices.

                   When Bilbo makes the gigantic leap of faith and steps out, placing his foot on the dusty hobbit path that will lead him away from everything he knows, Gandalf says, “Home is now behind you, the world is ahead.”

                   Mythical stories always have a hero. This main character is on a journey. Joseph Campbell termed it the “hero’s journey” and it can be broken down into very specific parts. Within the story, there is a hero, a loss or obstacle that must be overcome – a journey that will test the hero. Along the route, there are often animals, magic, other people to help or give clues, but the hero has to conquer his challenge if he wishes to come out the other side of the story with the title of hero, where he then collects the kingdom and reward. While it’s true that the journey is fraught with danger, disappointment, often initial failure or setbacks, it is also true that the big picture is about the hero learning, growing and proving worthy of the challenge and the reward. Let’s bring this home and I’ll state the obvious: You are the hero of YOUR story.

                   This is a fun perspective. This is a perspective that can help you stand back up when you’ve been leveled. It’s a perspective that can remind you who you truly are no matter what dragon you’re facing. It’s a perspective that can help you create the story you want. So, the parts of the hero story that are so exciting in the movies, in the books, in the theater, are the parts that we hate most in real life. No one likes the loneliness of waiting for Prince Charming, or the depressing sleep brought on by a poison apple, or the blood loss when the unexpected dragon descends upon you. That’s pretty universal – we don’t like to suffer. YES, it is soooo true that having crappy or downright horrible things happen to us sucks. Here’s a reality check for you—when the big fights come that define the hero, in the stories, does the hero stay in the space of the fight (whether he wins or loses) or does he move forward? Can you picture if he stayed in the space, the clearing of trees where he was jumped by the band of trolls that robbed and beat him – and if he paced and cussed them and claimed that they had ruined the rest of his life. And he did this year after year, never leaving the clearing because he had been wronged and dammit if he left somehow this would never be made right? That’s not how the hero stories play out. That’s not how the hero moves on to become the hero.  If you stay in that space, that victim space, that tortured space, that place where the challenge, the antagonist and the obstacle that arrived to challenge you are all you focus on, even long after the event or person has passed, where does your story end? Does it end at all? Do you ever become the hero with the reward, or are you stuck in the whirlpool of reliving the dragon’s lair?

                   A few years back I spent time with a family who had some rough and life changing abuse as children. The mother of the family had been molested as a child. Now, at almost 70 years old, around every holiday family gathering, was the long going discussion about the past. About how “mom couldn’t be held responsible for the things she said or did because of this event in her childhood.” The event with the creepy uncle that should have been put in prison, was a travesty. There is no excuse for child abuse of any type, but I wondered why it was always the topic of conversation, and found the negative energy they generated, day after day, year after year, family party after family party to be a sad loss of their lives. She had allowed the creepy jailbait uncle to steal huge portions of her entire life, and to define her children’s perception of her and their life together.

                   Please understand, I’m not making light of our dragons. Not by a long shot. We all have them. Sometimes they are large, fire-breathing, armored things, and other times they are smaller but with jagged claws and sharp teeth. Whatever they look like they are our dragons. They are real. They are mean. They are heart wrenching. But here’s the take….You don’t have to stay there. When the battle is over find the lesson, find the takeaway, heal, move on with more wisdom, insight, and empathy for other travelers in their own stories. Move on toward your happily-ever-after, because one thing is certain – everyone has them, the dragons always show up, and while the path to moving forward is much easier said than done, it still must be done in order to be the hero you truly are.

                   Now, this food for thought is about choosing the perspective that will best serve our forward progress as the powerful hero of our own story. That being said, as with all things, this does not mean that we hide our stories, our journeys, our difficult times in shame. All the heroes have fights they win and fights they lose. They are heroes because they are out on the quest trying. They stepped onto the path, away from safety (safety of a risk-free job to follow an entrepreneurial dream, the safety of a terrible but predictable relationship to find a healthy love, the safety of keeping ourselves from vulnerability by not being open)  To be whole we must accept what has happened in our lives and along our journeys – we get to accept the fights we won and learn from the fights we lost. But we are both.

                   Brene Brown, for those of you who are not familiar with her work, is a research professor at the University of Houston Graduate College of Social work. She’s also the author of a number of NY Times best selling books like “Daring Greatly” and “I thought it was just me” You may know her from her Ted Talk on vulnerability. In her book Rising Strong, she says,

                   “The irony is that we attempt to disown our difficult stories to appear more whole or more acceptable, but our wholeness – even our whole heartedness – actually depends on the integration of all our experiences, including the falls.”

                   What a beautiful concept. Our hero’s journey is the real thing. It’s got the difficult stuff, the falling down, the spaces before the hero proves himself/herself, the spaces that the hero may want to hide because he/she feels shame or guilt. But who are we really? Aren’t we a true conglomeration of the total of our experiences? Hell Yes We Are! We got bloody in the fight, but we chose not to stay in the dark hours. We chose to celebrate the moments of magic, of learning, of serendipity and of strength. We get to tell our story – accepting the moments when we were not our best selves because without those moments we don’t become who we are now. It’s all a part of the big picture. There’s no shame in the times we miss the mark when we aim and try again.

                   Now I’m not saying that all the dirty laundry of our lives should be posted on FB. What I am saying, is that we need to be at peace with our own hero’s journey, with the full acceptance that YOU ARE the hero. I am the hero. And we ARE the sum of our journeys, both the good and the bad. Without the times where we are face down in the mud, we wouldn’t appreciate the times when our faces are turned to a blue sky with a summer sun and the cool breeze at it skips across our skin.

                   Brene Brown also said, “People who wade into the discomfort and vulnerability and tell the truth about their stories are the real badasses.” And, it’s true. Vulnerability really brings power. Truth brings peace. If your story needs a perspective change so you can leave the victim behind and walk into your power, then revisit the story. Reframing is a powerful tool. Last week I talked about how I reframed my story. This week, take one of your stories that you thought of from last week’s assignment, and picture you as the hero of the story. How does the story change? How does the ending change? How does the perspective change so that the hero learns, triumphs, and moves on down the path of his journey? You ARE the hero. And like the Hobbit, you are on an unexpected journey, and yes it is dangerous business walking out one’s front door, but that’s also the business of living, and YOU are writing the story. I’ll see you next week on Love Your Story podcast.

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1243Wed, 28 Sep 2016 17:50:41 -070017:00falsefullHeading out into the adventures of living big is always scary. If it's not then the adventure isn't big enough for you. So when you put your feet on that path, remember that you are the hero in this story. But also remember that the heroes win some and they lose some...that's the journey. But to become triumphant in the end the hero never stays in the swamp or the places where the trials of his/her strength are tested. No, they move on to get the reward, the happily ever after, the promised kingdom. Moving on is part of the journey.Lori LeeEpisode 001 Story Super Power – Reframing so we can Fly!Episode 001 Story Super Power – Reframing so we can Fly!

                   Stories are our lives in language! There is nothing that comes more natural in human communication than to tell a story or recap an event that has taken place in our lives. In fact, it is so natural and happens so often that we are usually completely unaware that we are doing it. If it’s lunch time for you, you’ve probably already told 3 or 4 stories this morning. But have you ever stopped to think about their power? Stories are either the source of our super powers, or our kryptonite!

                   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Since the beginning of time and recorded history stories have been the means humans used to informally share experiences, beliefs, identities, and ideologies. It doesn’t matter the culture, the country or the belief system, we are all united by STORY!

                   During my master’s research, in the field of folklore, I studied the personal narratives of hikers, bikers, skiers, rock climbers…you get the idea. The things I found, like how we use stories to build our reputations (for example, when one tells a story about riding their mountain bike along a knife-edge mountain trail, they are inadvertently sharing that they are skilled mountain biker) to share awe (such as a retelling of falling asleep under a dark night sky, untouched by light pollution and the billions of stars that become visible in that space), to inspire (such as a story of persevering through a difficult snowstorm), to define ourselves, to keep ourselves in a cage, to make sense of events…the list goes on and on. These peaked my interest because it was fascinating to discover the multitude of things that we subconsciously use story for: the sheer depth of ways we automatically use story to define our very lives, our self percerception, the world around us.  As I started working on my PhD dissertation research proposal, I found a new angle that peaked my interest, namely I wanted to research the difference between how we expected our lives to turn out vs. how different they usually turn out. I found in my research an understanding of how our families, genders, cultures, race, economic status, sexual experience and preference, education, etc. set those expectations for each of us; which then went on to highlight how our life expectations and the acceptability of our stories are created by a set of imposed laws that are created by our environment. Do you realize what this means? This means that the very stories that define ourselves to ourselves are actually created from a set of criteria that is completely arbitrary and depends upon where you were born and what that culture defined for you. In one culture you may be considered a goddess of perfect living, in a different culture you might be considered an outcast. And yet, there you are, the exact same person. Should our perceptions of personal value and acceptability be taken seriously in the big pictures?

                   As is true with most higher education research, we seek answers to things that puzzle us, things we want to make our own peace with, things we want to understand. This was no different for me. I was interested in how others expected their lives to turn out, and if it met their expectations because my life had not turned out as I planned or expected. Born into a family and culture with a prized family ethic, my three divorces have been a source of shame and failure for me. Try dating and telling someone you’ve been divorced 3 times. It never bodes well. I usually tell them 7 times, so that, “No really just 3” makes it seem...]]>Episode 001 Story Super Power – Reframing so we can Fly!

                   Stories are our lives in language! There is nothing that comes more natural in human communication than to tell a story or recap an event that has taken place in our lives. In fact, it is so natural and happens so often that we are usually completely unaware that we are doing it. If it’s lunch time for you, you’ve probably already told 3 or 4 stories this morning. But have you ever stopped to think about their power? Stories are either the source of our super powers, or our kryptonite!

                   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m Lori Lee, and I’m excited for our future together of telling stories, evaluating our own stories, and lifting ourselves and others to greater places because of our control over our stories. This podcast is about empowerment and giving you, the listener, ideas to work with in making your stories work for you. Power serves you best when you know how to use it.

                   Since the beginning of time and recorded history stories have been the means humans used to informally share experiences, beliefs, identities, and ideologies. It doesn’t matter the culture, the country or the belief system, we are all united by STORY!

                   During my master’s research, in the field of folklore, I studied the personal narratives of hikers, bikers, skiers, rock climbers…you get the idea. The things I found, like how we use stories to build our reputations (for example, when one tells a story about riding their mountain bike along a knife-edge mountain trail, they are inadvertently sharing that they are skilled mountain biker) to share awe (such as a retelling of falling asleep under a dark night sky, untouched by light pollution and the billions of stars that become visible in that space), to inspire (such as a story of persevering through a difficult snowstorm), to define ourselves, to keep ourselves in a cage, to make sense of events…the list goes on and on. These peaked my interest because it was fascinating to discover the multitude of things that we subconsciously use story for: the sheer depth of ways we automatically use story to define our very lives, our self percerception, the world around us.  As I started working on my PhD dissertation research proposal, I found a new angle that peaked my interest, namely I wanted to research the difference between how we expected our lives to turn out vs. how different they usually turn out. I found in my research an understanding of how our families, genders, cultures, race, economic status, sexual experience and preference, education, etc. set those expectations for each of us; which then went on to highlight how our life expectations and the acceptability of our stories are created by a set of imposed laws that are created by our environment. Do you realize what this means? This means that the very stories that define ourselves to ourselves are actually created from a set of criteria that is completely arbitrary and depends upon where you were born and what that culture defined for you. In one culture you may be considered a goddess of perfect living, in a different culture you might be considered an outcast. And yet, there you are, the exact same person. Should our perceptions of personal value and acceptability be taken seriously in the big pictures?

                   As is true with most higher education research, we seek answers to things that puzzle us, things we want to make our own peace with, things we want to understand. This was no different for me. I was interested in how others expected their lives to turn out, and if it met their expectations because my life had not turned out as I planned or expected. Born into a family and culture with a prized family ethic, my three divorces have been a source of shame and failure for me. Try dating and telling someone you’ve been divorced 3 times. It never bodes well. I usually tell them 7 times, so that, “No really just 3” makes it seem better. I knew I was a good person, despite these horrible experiences that had caused me so much heart-wrenching pain over the years, but it was so far from what I planned, and I had gender expectations, religious expectations, family and cultural expectations that I had not lived up to. So, studying this topic was personal for me. How do we find peace with our stories, because they ARE our stories, the only ones we have – and WE GET TO WRITE them. As I studied I learned fascinating things about story. One of the largest discoveries was realizing there is no hard and fast truth to an event. Depending upon whose perspective you looked at an event at, the story would be different because of the vastly different lenses that we all look through. Not only is there variety in what our families expect from us, but also in what are religions expect from us, and what we are expected to do if we are male vs. female. What if we are born into money – the way we view life will be vastly different than for those who have lived on minimum wage or struggled for their next meal. All these lenses – and we each have a different set – color everything we see.

                   These understandings began to make me uncomfortable — the idea that first-person accounts could often not be counted on opened a lot of doors for reality checks. As I did more research into the research others had done on the topic, I found academics in psychology, in folklore, in social sciences, etc. acknowledging the control we have in creating our own stories, I noted the concerns of the legal system regarding such things as the reliability of first-person testimony in court, even the research my thesis professor did on how the mind, over time, can believe that we were in certain places or experienced certain things that we did not, if we hear the story or tell the story often enough. As an example of this –  my professor, Lynne McNeill at Utah State University, told a story in her paper, “It Happened to Me: Motivating the shift from third to first person perspectives in legends and Personal Narratives” of when she was a young girl and she was babysitting. Uncomfortable with answering the door in an unfamiliar home for which she was responsible, stranger danger was a nerve-racking part of the babysitting adventure. One night the doorbell rang and she could see there was more than one person out there. She was really stressed, but she opened the door a little and right in front of her, at eye level, was this picture. They were holding a magazine open to the center spread and she just stood there frozen staring at what she calls a “bizarre picture of green rolling hills and a kid playing with a panda.” It was the Jehovah’s Witnesses proselyting with their WatchTower magazine.

                   Well, years later she heard her friend tell the story, only when her friend told it, her friend was telling it as if it had happened to her. How was it possible that they both had memories of it happening to them?. Being an open-minded thinker, my professor realized that there was nothing to prove that she wasn’t the one who had created the memory vs. her friend being the one who created it. Had it really been her experience, or had it been her friends? Both swore it was their own.

                   The plasticity of memory is an uncomfortable idea at best. How many people have created memories of things that never happened, or saw things happen to someone else, or in a movie, and over time adopted those memories as their own? To most people, the idea seems ludicrous. Maybe something only an unstable mind might wander to, but research shows it’s quite real.

                   So aside from the terrifying idea that the realities and stories we remember are a fluid, ever-changing thing as our perspectives and motives (We’ll talk more about this in future episodes) change, and the fact that some memories can even just be created, the over-arching issue here is that story is not fact. The story of my divorces is told from my perspective. I can focus my story on the good things that each man brought in to my life. I can focus my story on the horrible betrayals and heart-wrenching events, I can focus my story the every popular “victim” mindset or I can focus my story on what I learned—there are a lot of angles I can choose to take with any story. The question I need to ask is: Which one serves me best? Which perception of your stories serves YOU best?

                    

                   Tears streamed down my cheeks, but the sun had set and my fellow workshop attendees were caught up in their own social circles as our break commenced on the sidewalk outside the Columbus Convention Center.  I was completely unconcerned about my show of emotion because the whole group had been through so many emotional experiences that someone crying was hardly new or interesting. The dark of the evening closing in around us cooled the hot sidewalk, and the warm summer air was downright delicious after the rampant AC in the conference hall. The hot brick of the building, heated by the sun during the long day, warmed by back as I sat, knees up, head back, against the wall.

                   “What’s up?” a voice said, and I looked up to see my workshop “buddy” looking down at me. Since the past days had been filled with tears and vulnerability as everyone worked to uncover buried pains that had too long lodged in our psyches, I simply looked up at him and said, “I don’t know how to not be a victim.” I didn’t spend a lot of time explaining how I don’t spend time thinking about past grievances and injustices. I’m not the type of person who goes around complaining about how unfair life is, in fact I felt I was pretty well adjusted to the things that had happened in my life, but at the same time there is no doubt that my failed relationships, disloyal friends, deaths and cruel people I had crossed paths with had been key in forming who I was and how I saw my life. “I didn’t ask for any of this,” I said to him, “so how am I not supposed to feel victimized when crappy painful things happen to me due to other people’s choices?”

                   He spent no time placating me either and simply said, “Let’s reframe it.”

                   “How would you reframe it?” I challenged, my voice tired. “What other way is there to see it? I’ve spent the last 20 years or more with rampant heartbreak over things other people brought into my life. How do you make that look good?”

                   “Here’s what I see,” he said. “Everyone who cheated on you, misbehaved, lied, broke your trust, abandoned you, abused you and stabbed you in the back has been extracted from your life. This is their loss–they don’t get to be a part of your life anymore. On top of that, all your experiences have allowed you to become the strong woman that you are now. They have given you an understanding that you did not have, empathy that doesn’t come without experience, and understanding that gives you a depth and beauty that only the trees who weather the storm can claim. On top of that, they have provided you the fodder—the emotion and experience—so that you are able to write from a place that can touch other people. And now the past is over and you can close the door on it and get out of your own way as you move into the future you’re supposed to have, using your past life experiences to inform and inspire, but otherwise letting them stay in the past. You are done with them.”

                   Or something like that. I’m paraphrasing. But that’s what I got out of it. During that 20 minute break, and that five-minute exchange I finally saw this pile of pain, embarrassment, loss, abuse, abandonment, and all the other crappy painful words that described my past to me, in a way that would allow me to move forward. It wasn’t that it would be easy and that all my problems were solved and my issues of trust were gone, but it gave me a space, a reframe that was honest and real and hopeful, and I could work with that. What if everything crappy that had been a part of my life could be repurposed for good? What if I could see, from my current vantage point, purpose in my years of pain and deep disappointment? What if who I am now would not have been possible without walking the path I walked? And what if that mattered very much because who I am now is a woman with some degree of wisdom, understanding, and empathy? What if I wasn’t a victim, but a heroine of my own story?  The hero’s journey is fraught with deep challenge, or there would not be a hero. What if I choose to reframe my story and find the magic, the fairy godmothers, the sign at the crossroads when I needed it most, the elf that shows up to share a magic word or a riddle I have to figure out? What if, with a little faith, I could begin to see my story from a bigger picture perspective, not just from the current mud bog I am currently trying to get out of?

                   What if you could too? In the words of Hans Christian Andersen, “Life itself is the most wonderful fairy tale.”

                    

                   Now I want to be clear. I’m not by any means suggesting that we revamp our stories into lies, rather, we look deeper into our stories to find the deepest truth. If we need to make things right, then we do. If we need to change a way of being, then we do. If we need to acknowledge that a perception is completely false because well-meaning “others” fed it to us, then we do. It’s a serious process that requires a strength of character and a real dedication to working through the lies we tell ourselves that do not serve us.

                   I propose that when we look at our full life stories – our victim stories, the synopsis of our lives, we also have the power to choose our perspective and reframe the tales into stories that build and bless rather than lock us into a box of anger, hate, apathy, or carefully placed armor. On my upcoming podcasts, we’ll get serious and real about these ideas in much more detail. I’ll start breaking down some ideas for you to consider that can help you come to a place where you LOVE YOUR STORY, even if it didn’t turn out as you expected.

                   I’m going to end every podcast with a challenge. This week I challenge you to think about your life stories, so you come to the table next week with your stories in mind. Maybe even think about them from a number of different perspectives, just to see how the story changes. I know that your story feels like a fact that is unchangeable, but I promise you, there are other ways to see it. Find a way that serves your highest and healthiest purpose.

                   Have a great week out there sharing your stories and I’ll meet you back here for the next podcast.

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1229Wed, 21 Sep 2016 18:32:46 -070017:56falsefullWe all have our life stories. Most didn't turn out as expected and they all have a range of joy, guilt, heartbreak, love, shame, excitement, hope and regret. It's the human condition. This podcast is about looking truthfully, without blinders, at our stories, and finding out how we can reframe them so that they empower us and hold us high in a space of hope and self-worth, rather than keep us in small boxes of bitterness, anger, and struggle. How do we access our super powers?Lori LeeEpisode 000 IntroductionPodcast 000

                   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Before we get started in our weekly episodes I wanted to introduce myself and this phenomenal podcast so you know who and what you’re listening to.

                   Love Your Story – a podcast about the power of story, how we can use our stories to empower us, and take the prerogative to reframe the stories that hold us back, while celebrating the unique heroic journey we each take.

                   I’m a professional writer and have been for 25 years. I published my first article in an Access Fund newsletter (rock climbing activist newsletter), without payment, the year I graduated from college and was so thrilled that I persisted beyond the future file full of rejection notices to a space of 25 years later having four books published, over a hundred articles on athlete profiles, how-to cook Dutch Oven, which sleeping bag is hot this season, where to hike, snowshoe, find a good yurt, or tackle the top white-water rafting experience in the state of Utah. How does writing for the outdoor recreation industry have anything to do with stories?

                   Plenty! Who tells more stories than people who climb wild mountains, kayak running rapids, ski steep and deep powder and travel on the trails and waterways of the wild? Of all the groups with stories the outdoor recreation folkgroup thrives on making and sharing stories to define who they are within their own groups. Stories abound with outdoor recreationalist because they are creating new stories every day. I did my master’s research on the personal narrative and found amazing things – I learned that our conversations are rituals, that our stories are serving functions that we often don’t even consciously realize, that tremendous information about ourselves and our cultures can be gleaned from our stories and so much more! But the more I learned and the more research I did, the more exciting the topic became because it’s so wonderful – it’s the language everyone speaks and everyone understands.  Even more than that, while it comes naturally to tell stories, the average person has very little idea about the role that stories are playing in their lives, or the control they have over them to build empires, live dreams, or more often, to hold ourselves in small, scared places. This podcast is about giving you a tool, and the instruction manual and a broader understanding so that you can use your stories to build, empower, celebrate and free yourself.

                   We are excited to create a community, to share a broad range of empowering ideas from how and why to reframe a story, to how businesses and leaders can use stories to share their vision, branding, and company values. We’ll talk about the hero’s journey, about getting rid of stories – those one-liners in your head that keep you pinned down. Then we’ll celebrate and explore the stories of successes, failures, losses and growth that define the human experience. We have a plethora of ideas and research that revolve around this powerful language that we all speak – and we want to share these empowering and enriching ideas so that your life becomes bigger and better.

                   Matt, my podcast partner and I, want to make a difference! We want to help others and ourselves shake off the old stories that don’t work and fly high with the ones that hold us high. We both have families – He has a wonderful little family who will be heading out to travel the country next year and recording and creating stories of their travels as they spend a year on the road. I have 2 sons and a cute little yorky, and we create lots of family stories on the ski slopes and traveling adventures. We have a few harder stories, like my son’s diagnosis with Leukemia earlier this year, and a few bad marriage endeavors, but that’s all part of the bigger story! We all have REAL stories.

                   To create our community we want your feedback, questions and ideas. Subscribe and review the podcast,  then go to our...]]>Podcast 000

                   Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. Before we get started in our weekly episodes I wanted to introduce myself and this phenomenal podcast so you know who and what you’re listening to.

                   Love Your Story – a podcast about the power of story, how we can use our stories to empower us, and take the prerogative to reframe the stories that hold us back, while celebrating the unique heroic journey we each take.

                   I’m a professional writer and have been for 25 years. I published my first article in an Access Fund newsletter (rock climbing activist newsletter), without payment, the year I graduated from college and was so thrilled that I persisted beyond the future file full of rejection notices to a space of 25 years later having four books published, over a hundred articles on athlete profiles, how-to cook Dutch Oven, which sleeping bag is hot this season, where to hike, snowshoe, find a good yurt, or tackle the top white-water rafting experience in the state of Utah. How does writing for the outdoor recreation industry have anything to do with stories?

                   Plenty! Who tells more stories than people who climb wild mountains, kayak running rapids, ski steep and deep powder and travel on the trails and waterways of the wild? Of all the groups with stories the outdoor recreation folkgroup thrives on making and sharing stories to define who they are within their own groups. Stories abound with outdoor recreationalist because they are creating new stories every day. I did my master’s research on the personal narrative and found amazing things – I learned that our conversations are rituals, that our stories are serving functions that we often don’t even consciously realize, that tremendous information about ourselves and our cultures can be gleaned from our stories and so much more! But the more I learned and the more research I did, the more exciting the topic became because it’s so wonderful – it’s the language everyone speaks and everyone understands.  Even more than that, while it comes naturally to tell stories, the average person has very little idea about the role that stories are playing in their lives, or the control they have over them to build empires, live dreams, or more often, to hold ourselves in small, scared places. This podcast is about giving you a tool, and the instruction manual and a broader understanding so that you can use your stories to build, empower, celebrate and free yourself.

                   We are excited to create a community, to share a broad range of empowering ideas from how and why to reframe a story, to how businesses and leaders can use stories to share their vision, branding, and company values. We’ll talk about the hero’s journey, about getting rid of stories – those one-liners in your head that keep you pinned down. Then we’ll celebrate and explore the stories of successes, failures, losses and growth that define the human experience. We have a plethora of ideas and research that revolve around this powerful language that we all speak – and we want to share these empowering and enriching ideas so that your life becomes bigger and better.

                   Matt, my podcast partner and I, want to make a difference! We want to help others and ourselves shake off the old stories that don’t work and fly high with the ones that hold us high. We both have families – He has a wonderful little family who will be heading out to travel the country next year and recording and creating stories of their travels as they spend a year on the road. I have 2 sons and a cute little yorky, and we create lots of family stories on the ski slopes and traveling adventures. We have a few harder stories, like my son’s diagnosis with Leukemia earlier this year, and a few bad marriage endeavors, but that’s all part of the bigger story! We all have REAL stories.

                   To create our community we want your feedback, questions and ideas. Subscribe and review the podcast,  then go to our website often to share your wins and challenges, to give us feedback on the episodes, and ask questions that pop up about this broad and beautiful topic!

                   We’ll take your questions and ideas as we frame future episodes, and as we create our interactive community of people who come to understand the power of this tool and are excited about the difference this understanding can make in how we live.

                   Now go and enjoy episode 1

                   ]]>http://loveyourstorypodcast.com/?p=1240Tue, 20 Sep 2016 17:38:21 -070005:13falsefullFind out who Lori Lee is and why stories are worth a whole podcast. Introducing you to the who, what and why.Lori Lee