Key Points

• Why Mother's Day has become "just another day" for Sarah — and what that shift actually signals about her inner work
• The surprising origin of Mother's Day: created by Anna Jarvis for personal reflection and intimate family connection, then commercialized so aggressively that Jarvis spent her life savings trying to abolish the holiday she created
• The $25 billion commercial juggernaut Mother's Day has become — and why that matters for how we relate to the day
• Why being triggered by Mother's Day is often a direct reflection of needs that aren't being met on a regular basis (not just one day a year)
• The powerful insight from a mom in The School of MOM community: "I'm only triggered by Mother's Day when I feel burned out or I'm not making time for myself"
• How resentment is an expectations-in-waiting — and what your Mother's Day feelings are actually pointing toward
• An invitation to design your family celebrations on your own terms, not Hallmark's
• A post-Mother's Day reflection framework: How did it feel? How do you want to feel next year? What needs to shift between now and then?
• Celebrating six years of The School of MOM — launched on Mother's Day 2020

Quotes

"The trigger is the gift. If you're coming into Mother's Day and there's a lot of pressure on it, that means those needs are not getting filled outside of this one day a year."

"I don't need a day to be appreciated. I don't need a day to advocate for time for myself anymore — because that is just part of my being now."

"Expectations are resentments in the works."

"I'm not waiting around for someone else to give me permission to go for a walk or get a massage. It's just part of what I do now."

Resources Mentioned

• Episode 89: The Grief for a Mother Who's Still Alive SPOTIFY: https://open.spotify.com/episode/4kP528ObM87oS9uZhHQ9bH?si=pkUYRBr5QoiL8QOiYZ1OBA or APPLE: https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/89-the-grief-for-a-mother-whos-still-alive/id1771757923?i=1000763998127
• Episode 90: When Mother’s Day Is a Trigger (and Why That’s Not a Bad Thing) SPOTIFY: https://open.spotify.com/episode/3MRgYiDvClmZlE16NVjpVH?si=KliK-l2VQHeqtxfHLgEZJw or APPLE: https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/90-when-mothers-day-is-a-trigger-and-why-thats-not-a-bad-thing/id1771757923?i=1000766202575
• Flourished Mother Map: https://theschoolofmom.com/map
• Radical Flourishing — doors opening end of May: https://theschoolofmom.com/radical

What's Coming Next

If this episode stirred something in you, sit with it. The post-Mother's Day reflection is where the real work begins. And if you're ready for support in tending to what came up — Radical Flourishing doors are opening at the end of May. This is the container where the shift Sarah described actually happens.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

• Why Mother's Day triggers such a wide spectrum of feelings — and why all of them deserve to be honored
• A celebration of "the apples" — women in the School of MOM community whose strained or non-existent relationship with their mother is actually their biggest doorway to healing
• How the relationship we have with our mothers (for better or for worse) is foundational to our self-worth — and why self-worth is at the nucleus of everything we desire
• The connection between your subconscious sense of worthiness and your ability to receive, desire, and expand what you think is possible for your life
• Sarah's personal journey with her own mom — and the shift from "I would give all this up for a healthy mom" to genuine gratitude for the doorway her mom became
• An introduction to Radical Flourishing — Sarah's most intimate support container — and why doors are opening at the end of May
• The question that guides the work: How good can it get?

Quotes

"The trigger is the gift. What is on the other side of that is really claiming what you desire — but more than that, it is claiming new levels of what you desire to unfold."

"If you desire something in your life but your subconscious doesn't think you are worthy of it, it is going to be nearly impossible for that thing to come to fruition."

"I would never be where I'm at today in terms of my ability to meet and tend to and love and mother all parts of myself mindfully — if it weren't for the mother that I have."

"Let's all collectively decide to step into a new level of worthiness and self-worth — no matter what our relationship is with our mom."

Resources Mentioned

• Episode 89 — Grieving a mother who is still alive: SPOTIFY: https://open.spotify.com/episode/4kP528ObM87oS9uZhHQ9bH?si=pkUYRBr5QoiL8QOiYZ1OBA or APPLE: https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/89-the-grief-for-a-mother-whos-still-alive/id1771757923?i=1000763998127
• Radical Flourishing — Sarah's most intimate support group (small group + one-on-one + in-person retreats). Doors open end of May — limited space. DM Sarah or get on the newsletter to be notified.: https://theschoolofmom.com/radical
• Flourished Mother Map: https://theschoolofmom.com/map
• Newsletter: https://theschoolofmom.com/newsletter

What's Coming Next

However Mother's Day lands for you this year — with joy, grief, or something messier — you belong here. The school is a place where all of it is welcome, and where the healing happens in community. Reach out, get on the list, and keep going.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

• What it means to be an "Apple" — and why having a space where you don't have to explain yourself is everything
• The bucket that only your mother can fill (unconditional witnessing, love, and acceptance) — and what to do when she can't
• Why even the most well-meaning partners often make it worse — and what to ask for from the people in your life instead
• Why the School of MOM community exists: to be the circle where you are deeply seen, without explanation
• The two ends of the spectrum: numbing/compartmentalizing vs. fully insourcing your own mothering — and what to do when you're somewhere in the middle
• The first practice to reach for in a hard moment: the mindfulness of struggle ("This is really hard" + hand on heart)
• Introducing FMF — Feel My Feelings — and why carving out intentional time to be with your feelings (not alone) is the practice
• The power of non-human resources: trees, rocks, bodies of water, candles, pets — as steady companions in your FMF moments
• How naming the struggle brings your prefrontal cortex online and opens the door to the nervous system's safety and connection state
• An announcement: Sarah is opening a rare one-on-one coaching spot for a mom of daughters who is ready to close the gap between knowing and embodying

Quotes

"I am honestly ready for my mom to die — and all I want is my mom. And there's not a lot of groups where you can say something like that and people are nodding their heads."

"Your relationship with your mom is so foundational, so profoundly foundational to everything in your life — how you mother, how you relate to yourself. It creeps in."

"The next best resource, ultimately, is you — to learn how to insource what you are seeking from your mom."

"This is really hard. Hand on heart. This is hard. That's the first practice."

"What we practice, we get good at."

Resources Mentioned

• Untethered alum community — for women with dysfunctional or estranged mother relationships: https://theschoolofmom.com/untetheredwaitlist
• Send Sarah a voice note
• Flourished Mother MAP: https://theschoolofmom.com/map
• One-on-one coaching inquiry: http://theschoolofmom.com/private-coaching

What's Coming Next

If this episode spoke to you, don't keep it to yourself — share it with a mom in your life who struggles around Mother's Day. And if you're ready to stop white-knuckling it alone and start doing this work with support, reach out about the one-on-one spot or explore the Flourished Mother Map as your first step.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Quotes

"We are not meant to be on all the time — in business, in life, in motherhood, in our relationships, in and with our bodies."

"We are cyclical beings and women are part of nature. We are not meant to be on the same 24-hour cycle that men are on because our hormones don't work that way."

"Cut yourself some slack, sign out, and get some rest."

Resources Mentioned

• Previous episode on cyclical living (link to relevant episode when available): SPOTIFY or APPLE
• Flourished Mother Map: https://theschoolofmom.com/map

What's Coming Next

Sarah will be back next week with a brand new episode. In the meantime, take this week's episode for what it is - permission to rest.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

• Why "mental load" is a misnomer — and what the more accurate (and more useful) term actually is
• How our thoughts, emotions, and nervous system are inextricably linked — and why treating the load as purely cognitive leaves us without the right tools
• The difference between emotions and feelings — and why understanding this distinction is foundational to being a human who can flourish
• Why 90–95% of our experience (including the choices we make under load) is unconscious — and what that means for real change
• How the same event (a child's fever, a doctor's appointment) lands completely differently depending on what's happening in your nervous system
• Why conversations about mental load often spiral into frustration, blame, and resentment — and what to do with that instead
• The MOMsight framework: a map of the play between your nervous system, body, emotions, feelings, thoughts, and lived experience
• Why offloading the brain body load isn't just about task redistribution — it's about shifting what's happening at a root level in your body
• Resources and research Sarah loves: Brené Brown's emotion research, Mark Brackett's Permission to Feel, and the Mood Meter/How We Feel app
• An invitation: Sarah has a one-on-one coaching spot open (May through year-end) for a mom ready to do this root cause work

Quotes

"Mental load suggests it's just thoughts in our head — and it's not. So we need to call that out."

"Each of these tasks comes with a different emotional load. It lives differently in your body. The real estate that it takes up is different."

"So often we are in thoughts and emotions and making choices from an unconscious place — which means we actually don't have control. Our programming is running the show."

"It's not so simple as moving tasks around. And the more we see it that way, the less we support ourselves and shift what's happening at a root level in our bodies."

Resources Mentioned

• Permission to Feel by Marc Brackett: https://a.co/d/08Q0oNFq
• The Mood Meter / How We Feel app (Marc Brackett): https://marcbrackett.com/how-we-feel-app-3/
• Fair Play card deck (task mapping for couples): https://fairplaypolicy.org/the-cards
• One-on-one coaching with Sarah (May–December 2026): reach out at http://theschoolofmom.com/private-coaching or DM on Instagram @the.schoolofmom: https://www.instagram.com/the.schoolofmom
• Send Sarah a voice note here!: https://speakpipe.com/theschoolofmom

What's Coming Next

If this episode stirred something in you, you're ready to go deeper. Take the first step with the Flourished Mother Map at https://theschoolofmom.com/map — and if one-on-one support feels like the right next step, Sarah would love to hear from you.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

• Why somatic work moves the needle in ways talk therapy can't — I spent years as a therapist talking through problems with women. Insight is valuable — but it's limited. When I discovered what was possible through body-based work, it changed everything. 90–95% of our experience is driven by unconscious programming living in our nervous system, and you simply can't talk your way out of that.
• What actually happens in a somatic session — Whether a client is brand new to this work or has been doing it for years, the experience is consistently the same: I can't believe what just came through. The body holds wisdom, intuition, and real-time healing that the mind can't access alone.
• Calling out the line everyone repeats — "The only thing you can control is your reaction." It's everywhere in coaching culture. And it's not quite true. If your unconscious nervous system is running the show — and for most of us, it is — you don't actually have control over your reactions in the moment. Telling yourself you should is just adding shame to the pile.
• The truth about control — You have very limited control over your in-the-moment reaction, especially when you're tired, triggered, or dysregulated. But you do have real, meaningful control over something: the support you choose, the practices you commit to, and the nervous system work you do in advance of those moments. That's the real lever.
• What the Flourished Mother actually looks like — She's not always calm. She's not always grounded. She feels the full spectrum of her humanness — including the anger — but she has the capacity to be with it. With presence, with grace, with compassion. And that capacity is built over time, through practice and support.

Quotes

"90 to 95% of our experience — the lens through which we see the world — is coming from our unconscious, which lives in our body."

"You will be surprised. I am surprised every time — I didn't think anything was gonna come through. And wow, I am so grateful I did that."

"You actually don't really have control over your reaction in the moment. But you do have control over the support that you decide to get."

"What you do have control over is the reprogramming and the tending and the grounding you did to be in a body that supports you to react in the way that you want to."

"Talking around in circles about the thing you wanna do is not going to help you change it in the moment."

Resources Mentioned

• Flourished Mother Map — A personalized session with Sarah to map your patterns and path forward: theschoolofmom.com/map
• Flourish Community — Monthly membership for ongoing nervous system support and integration: http://theschoolofmom.com/flourish
• One-on-one somatic sessions with Sarah — Reach out directly to book: http://theschoolofmom.com/private-coaching
• Send Sarah a voice note: https://www.speakpipe.com/theschoolofmom

What's Coming Next

If this episode stirred something in you, the next step is simple: choose the support. Whether that's a Flourished Mother Map, a one-on-one session, or joining the Flourish community — the work you do before the moment is what changes the moment.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

• How to ask "what's the point?" from a place of curiosity rather than shutdown — and why the difference matters (nervous system style)
• The two personal through-lines behind the founding of the School of MOM: not becoming her, and becoming the mother to yourself that you never had
• Why Sarah is estranged from her mother — and how that painful, personal reality became the heart of this work
• The "Apples" community: women who carry the weight of estranged or dysfunctional mother relationships, and why they don't need to explain themselves
• Why the goal isn't to learn more — it's integration: closing the gap between what you know and what you actually live in your body
• The two roots of integration: embodied application of what you're learning, and wholeness — welcoming and tending to all parts of yourself
• Flourish State Journaling: a powerful (and a little creepy-magical) practice for inhabiting your flourishing life as if it's already here
• Why community is the secret ingredient that makes integration sustainable
• A real-time moment from right before recording: what it looked like to actually be the Flourished Mother for her daughter — and why that's the whole point

Quotes

"What's the point? Not from the lens of 'what's the point' — that's very dorsal vagal, very shutdown. But what is the point?"

"The next best person to fill the hole that's left when your mom can't fill the bucket is you."

"Mothering Ourselves Mindfully was really about me becoming the mother to myself that I always needed and I never had."

"I don't want my 30-something-year-old daughter attending a workshop on how and why she needs to make more time for herself."

"Integration means closing the gap between what you know and what you feel and you're doing in your life."

"This is it. This is what I've been working for — being that sturdy, compassionate, patient, loving human for her."

Resources Mentioned

• Flourished Mother Map — a personalized zoom-out experience with reflection questions and a custom video from Sarah. All Sarah, no AI: https://theschoolofmom.com/map
• Discover Your Dominant Inner Voice Quiz — discover your dominant inner voice (anxiety, shame, negativity, or perfectionist): https://theschoolofmom.com/quiz
• FLOURISH Community — where Flourish State Journaling and other integration practices live, including live co-working calls on the community calendar: http://theschoolofmom.com/flourish

What's Coming Next

Keep asking the question. Whether it feels clarifying or a little jarring — that's the work. Come share how this episode lands for you, grab a Flourished Mother Map, and keep walking toward the most flourished version of yourself.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

1. Why "regulated" no longer works for me — The nervous system definition of regulated (moving through sympathetic and shutdown states and returning to grounded safety) is still true and valid. But the word itself has become too loaded — politically, culturally, and personally — to land the way it's meant to. Words matter, and this one isn't working anymore.
2. The personal moment that sparked this — A heated exchange with my husband, a group call where another mom voiced the exact same frustration, and the realization that I was holding a layer of self-blame on top of the original trigger: I should be more regulated. Why aren't I more regulated? Sound familiar?
3. The systemic piece we can't ignore — Women have been conditioned to keep their voices calm, their emotions contained, and their reactions palatable. The expectation to be "the regulated one" in the relationship, in the home, in the world — is a systemic pattern, not a personal failing.
4. What I want instead: flourished — Your kids don't need a perfect mom. They don't need a regulated mom. They need a flourished mom. A mom who is lit up by what she's passionate about, who unapologetically feels her feelings, who trusts her rage and her rest and her seasons.
5. The Flourished Mother archetypes — A breakdown of the inner archetypes that live inside the Flourished Mother:
6. The Mindful Gardner — present, self-compassionate (both tender and fierce), a kind witness to herself
7. The Boundary Boss — fierce and clear about what she needs to thrive, and unapologetic about it
8. The Rest Queen & Pleasure Goddess — rest and pleasure are not earned; they're key ingredients in the flourishing recipe
9. The Cyclical Celebrator — trusts the seasons of nature, the moon, and her own body; doesn't judge the winter or rush the bloom
10. What the Flourished Mother actually asks of us — Not to be calm all the time. Not to perform regulation. But to be fully human: alive, passionate, emotionally honest, boundaried, and trusting the process.
11. Permission to let go of regulated — If the word "regulated" has been shackling you — if you've been working overtime to be the composed, calm, measured one — this is your invitation to release that goal and find the word that actually fits. For me? It's flourished.

Quotes

"I don't want to be regulated. I want to be flourished."

"Your kids don't need a perfect mom. They need a flourished mom."

"She's the woman that is unapologetically living in a nervous system that is embracing the whole spectrum."

"I don't want my girls to grow up feeling like they have to work so hard to be regulated all the time."

"I want to be living my most fun, playful, unapologetically human life — which means I'm sad and I'm angry and I lose my temper. That's what I want to model."

Resources Mentioned

1. 🌿 Flourished Mother Starter Kit — Five nervous system practices to begin awakening your inner Flourished Mother: https://theschoolofmom.com/starter
2. 📬 Reach Sarah at hello@theschoolofmom.com
3. 🎙️ Send Sarah a voice note: speakpipe.com/theschoolofmom

What's Coming Next

Stay close — we're continuing to explore what it actually looks and feels like to be a Flourished Mother, from the inside out.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

1. What the Flourished Mother Map is and why women in Flourish consistently say it's worth the entire investment on its own
2. The self-driving car metaphor: how most of us are being driven by unconscious programming we didn't choose and can't see
3. Why having the right planner, system, or notebook will never get you to your destination if the GPS is programmed to go somewhere else
4. One of the most common themes in Flourished Mother Maps: making time for ourselves and the beliefs that get in the way
5. The "achieving first, rest later" programming so many high-functioning mothers carry — and what the updated belief system looks like
6. Why we need support to make our own unconscious conscious (even Sarah, who coaches on this, needs her own coach)
7. The garden metaphor: we can't blame the flower for not blooming — we have to look at the conditions it's planted in
8. How the Flourished Mother Map zooms out to show you where you are, where you're getting stuck, what's working, and what your path forward looks like
9. The full School of MOM journey: starting with your Flourished Mother Map → integration in Flourish → your unique path to flourishing

Quotes

"You have been put in a self-driving car that has its own destination — and you didn't pick it."

"You can have the newest planner, but you're still in the same place, because you're still in that outdated, unhelpful programming."

"We can't blame the flower for not blooming. We have to look at the conditions that the flower is planted in."

"My wellbeing, my nervous system state is at the nucleus of the thriving and flourishing of my family."

"We need support to make our own unconscious conscious."

Resources Mentioned

1. 🎂 Birthday Special — Flourished Mother Map: Limited spots available → https://checkout.theschoolofmom.com/map/
2. 
   
3. 🎙️ Send Sarah your voice note right here!: https://www.speakpipe.com/theschoolofmom

What's Coming Next

If this episode had you wondering who's really driving your car, reach out — Sarah would love to do a Flourished Mother Map with you. And watch this space: exciting things are ahead at the School of MOM.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

1. What "selves leadership" actually means — We are not just one self. We are a compilation of younger selves, reactive selves, and wiser selves. The inner work here is about tending to the contracted parts while awakening and amplifying the more grounded, steady parts that are ready to lead.
2. The connection to attachment theory — Many of us grew up without a securely attached caregiver — without someone who was emotionally healthy, attuned, and present. Selves leadership is about becoming that secure attachment figure for yourself, inside the ecosystem of your own inner world. It's not too late.
3. Awakening vs. creating — This is a crucial distinction. We are not building something from scratch. We are awakening what is already there. The steady, compassionate, resilient parts of you already exist — in your body, in your lineage, in your healed and wise ancestors, even if they weren't in your immediate family.
4. The grief that comes with this work — There is real grief in realizing you didn't have the model you needed growing up. That's valid, and we make room for it. And and — we can grieve that while also discovering that the resource we're looking for is actually accessible within us.
5. What's happening in our world right now — We are living in a moment with a real lack of grounded leadership. Our kids are watching. This isn't new — the feelings of hopelessness and overwhelm are ancient — but this moment is calling us to alchemize our anger and grief into effective action. That starts with leading ourselves.
6. Emotional safety starts inside — When you learn to lead all parts of yourself, you create emotional safety for yourself first. Your kids then experience a parent who can return to steadiness — because you can return to steadiness in the ecosystem of your own inner world.
7. You are being called, not invited — This is not a gentle nudge. Women and mothers everywhere are being called to wake up from inherited, programmed survival states. The more we stay in shutdown and hopelessness, the more we fuel the very systems we want to change.

Quotes

"We are becoming the unicorns here in The School of Mom."

"No one is coming to save us. We actually have to become those humans that we so desperately crave in our lives."

"Awakening versus creating — it's so much more challenging to create something from scratch than to tap into what is already there."

"When mothers learn how to lead all parts of themselves, you create emotional safety for yourself — and you create emotional safety for your kids."

"We all have an assignment right now, and that is to wake up."

Resources Mentioned

1. The Flourished Mother Starter Kit — Five nervous system practices to begin awakening your more grounded, mindful, discerning, and attuned self. Download it at https://theschoolofmom.com/start
2. Mothering Ourselves Mindfully — Sarah's signature program. Learn more at https://theschoolofmom.com/mom
3. Send Sarah a voice message: https://www.speakpipe.com/theschoolofmom

What's Coming Next

We're continuing to explore what it means to truly mother ourselves mindfully — not as a self-improvement project, but as a profound act of leadership. Stay close for what's coming next at The School of Mom.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

1. The marketing positioning statement that made me anxious in 2020 — and why I embrace it now
2. Why I was over-protecting moms from their own shame, and the shift I've made since
3. The difference between wanting to be better from a place of "I'm not enough" vs. "I'm ready and available"
4. What "better" actually means in my world: more steady, more grounded, more integrated — not more perfect
5. The conversation I had with my daughters asking them how I could be a better mom — and what they said
6. Why shame is like an appendix: we've largely evolved past needing it, and it rarely drives healthy action
7. Who I'm speaking to now: the self-aware, high-functioning mom who is activated by growth, not shamed by it
8. How wanting to be better actually helps us integrate the parts of ourselves that feel like they're never enough

Quotes

"There is nothing wrong with you as you are, and you still get to want more from yourself."

"Better, ironically, means that you've integrated the parts of yourselves that don't feel like they're good enough."

"I am perfectly imperfect. I embrace all parts of myself — and they're super lucky because of that."

"It's possible to grow and to be better without shame."

Resources Mentioned

1. Send Sarah a voice note! → Send Sarah your voice note right here! https://www.speakpipe.com/theschoolofmom
2. Learn more about Mothering Ourselves Mindfully → https://theschoolofmom.com
3. Email Sarah directly: hello@theschoolofmom.com

What's Coming Next

If this episode stirred something in you, send Sarah a voice note or share it with a mom friend you can go on a walk with and ask: "What does being a better mom mean to you?" Those are exactly the conversations the School of Mom is here for.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

1. The Three Ghosts — the hidden forces sapping your time, energy, and wellbeing: mental load, decision fatigue, and time scarcity. Leslie breaks down what each one is, how they compound one another, and what you can actually do about them.
2. The suitcase metaphor — why trying to fit your needs into an already overpacked life is like traveling with a tiny suitcase and giving all the space to everyone else. (And why it's time to get your own suitcase.)
3. The biological limit on decisions — you have a decision budget each day. Once it's spent, it's spent. Understanding this changes how you structure your mornings, your work, and where you spend your mental energy.
4. Time scarcity and the brain — research shows that whether the scarcity is food, money, or time, the neurological impact is the same. Mothers are disproportionately drowning in time scarcity, and it's not a personal failing — it's math.
5. The health data that should stop us in our tracks — women live nine fewer healthy years than men, 80% of autoimmune disease sufferers are women, and postpartum suicide is a leading cause of maternal death. This is not a wellness trend. This is a health crisis.
6. The number one predictor of a child's health and happiness — spoiler: it's their mother's health and happiness. The research is clear. Your nervous system regulation is your most important parenting tool.
7. Why moms are being left out of the healthspan movement — men are biohacking their way to longevity while mothers are cleaning counters and filling out camp forms. Leslie is here to change that.
8. Practical strategies — from batching decisions to protecting your mornings to asking your manager what they actually need, there are real, tangible ways to reclaim cognitive space and build a life that works for you.

Quotes

"We feel like it's our fault — but the reality is, we are trying to cram a week's worth of stuff into a two-day suitcase."

"If you're not in good mental and physical health, it actually hurts your children. And nobody wins if you go down in flames."

"Health for moms is my ministry."

"You may have to fiercely defend your dignity and your human right to claim the space that you need. It's difficult, but it's necessary."

Resources Mentioned

1. 📖 Repair with Self-Care: Your Guide to the Mom's Hierarchy of Needs by Leslie Forde: https://a.co/d/0iHy0x8v
2. 🌐 Leslie's website + wellness app + research study: momshierarchyofneeds.com
3. 💼 Connect with Leslie on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/momshierarchyofneeds/
4. 📖 Estrogen Matters — referenced by Leslie on menopause, health span, and longevity for women: https://a.co/d/08miRehA

Connect with Sarah

🎙️ Send Sarah your voice note right here! SpeakPipe — Send a voice message to The School of Mom: https://www.speakpipe.com/theschoolofmom

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

1. Why staying stuck in anger or hopelessness serves no one—not you, your family, or the causes you care about
2. How mothering ourselves mindfully is an act of resistance against systems that benefit from our overwhelm
3. The privilege and responsibility white women have to use our voices for good
4. Why you cannot expect your children to be more emotionally grounded than you are—they learn from what we model
5. The importance of "owning your experience" rather than staying in victim mode
6. How no one is coming to save you—but community and support can help you save yourself
7. The boat metaphor: pick a boat, get on a boat, but don't stay on a sinking boat
8. Why transformation begins the moment you commit, even before the work starts
9. The question to ask yourself: Are you proud of how you're showing up right now?

Quotes

"We cannot, we can no longer put off the responsibility that we have to be conscious, compassionate, committed humans to our loved ones, to our communities, to our planet."

"We can't expect our children to be more emotionally grounded and intelligent than we are. They have to learn it from us."

"There is no time to waste because change takes a long time."

"No one else is gonna step up. We need you. Your kids need you. You need you."

"Are you proud of how you're showing up for yourself right now? How you're showing up for your kids and how you're showing up for the causes that you care about?"

"The transformation is in the transaction."

Resources Mentioned

1. Mothering Ourselves Mindfully: Registration ends February 19th at midnight EST. Program starts February 23rd with weekly live calls for 8 weeks on Mondays at noon. Includes one-on-one call with Sarah, Spotify playlist for replays, and intentional buffer time. Learn more at https://theschoolofmom.com/mom
2. Flourish Community: Integration space for ongoing practice and community support

Send Sarah your voice note right here! SpeakPipe: https://www.speakpipe.com/theschoolofmom

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

1. Understanding "story follows state" - how your nervous system state creates your beliefs about time
2. Common time traps we fall into: "there's never enough time," "time is a thief," "you'll miss this one day"
3. How stress states drive our scarcity beliefs around time versus ventral vagal (grounded) state beliefs
4. Why saying "I don't have time" is really "I'm not making time" - and that's okay to acknowledge
5. The distinction between seasons where something truly doesn't fit versus when it's a priority issue
6. How writing a book taught me I can never say "I don't have time" again
7. Why multitasking won't work for nervous system healing - you actually need to pay attention
8. What will you wish you had made time for on your deathbed?
9. Integration practices designed specifically for moms (not morning routines that don't work when you're sleep-deprived)
10. When it's NOT a good time to join: deep postpartum, acute life transitions, major moves or illness
11. Why I'm no longer spending time convincing women they have time - meeting you where you are

Quotes

"Story follows state. The state that we are in our nervous system, in our body dictates the lens through which we see the world."

"When I slow down, time slows down."

"I can never ever say again that I don't have time because I writing a book, hours and hours and hours of writing."

"I do have time. I make time for what matters to me."

"This is not another thing that you have to add on. It's changing how you move through what you're already doing."

"People on their deathbed say they wish they were more present, they wish they had more time to play, they wish they were in that nervous system state that is that connected grounded state."

"I am entering a new era where I no longer have time to try to convince you that you can make the time."

Resources Mentioned

1. Mothering Ourselves Mindfully signature program - starting February 23rd: http://www.theschoolofmom.com/mom
2. "It Is Round Time" - bonus training included with MOM program enrollment about rewiring your relationship with time
3. Book a call with Sarah to discuss if the program is right for you: https://app.paperbell.com/checkout/packages/149935
4. Send Sarah your voice note right here!

What's Coming Next

Registration is open NOW for Mothering Ourselves Mindfully! This 8-week program includes four small group integration calls (Mondays at 12pm Eastern or Thursdays at 1pm Eastern) and four live teaching calls. Plus everyone who joins receives the complete "It Is Round Time" series as a bonus.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

1. Why I'm "unscaling" the Mom Program from multiple groups to one intimate cohort of 15 women
2. The common thread in conversations with mothers: overwhelm, time scarcity, and the gap between what we know is good for us and what we're actually doing
3. How I'm simplifying the structure: 8 weeks, Mondays at 12pm Eastern, 8 live calls—that's it
4. The real question underneath "Can I make the time work?"—it's usually programming, not logistics
5. Why money struggles are directly connected to your relationship with your mother (the "Money Matrix" = "Mother Matrix")
6. The bonus I'm adding for early enrollees: a 30-minute one-on-one call to work through whatever's getting in your way
7. Why most time obstacles aren't actually about moving mountains—they're about asking and worthiness work
8. How this program is designed so you can't hide—accountability baked into the small group structure
9. Why now is always the best time (and why I may not run another cohort in 2026 as I focus on writing my book)

Quotes

"It's just not my jam to strip down what I know is so powerful and important for women and mothers, and that is intimacy and connection."

"I don't wanna sign up for something that I know I'm not gonna follow through with. Like I don't wanna sign up for more shame on myself."

"When we actually look at it, it's not really moving mountains, it's usually just asking, right?"

"We move mountains for our kids and we need to move mountains for ourselves."

"Money struggles are directly correlated to your relationship with your mom. We could simultaneously call the money matrix the Mother Matrix."

Resources Mentioned

1. Mothering Ourselves Mindfully - 8-week signature program, enrollment open now for February start: http://www.theschoolofmom.com/mom
2. Book a call to talk through any stickiness you're bumping up against with joining the program: https://app.paperbell.com/checkout/packages/149935
3. Send Sarah your voice note right here! SpeakPipe - Send a voice message to theschoolofmom

What's Coming Next

Stay tuned for a full episode on money and the Mother Matrix—exploring why our relationship with investing in ourselves is intimately connected to our relationship with our mothers.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

1. Why awareness alone isn't enough - you can't think your way into lasting change
2. The reality that our conscious mind is only 5-10% of our experience - the rest is driven by our nervous system
3. The flip side of unsubscribing: What do you want to subscribe to instead?
4. Why unsubscribing from the belief that you can do this alone is the most important unsubscription
5. How my body speaks in full movies and visions during somatic meditation
6. The powerful meditation vision: flying alone through the storm vs. sitting in circle with other women, stoking our inner light
7. Why the only way to fly through life's weather is to first sit in circle and become the light
8. The truth that we don't have many models of emotionally attuned, grounded adults in our lives
9. You get to be the unicorn - and actually, you have to be, because no one else is stepping up
10. Why you can only give to others what you can give to yourself (backed by my entire grad school thesis!)
11. How every time we teach or hear something, we're different people - that's why repetition isn't redundant, it's essential
12. The urgency and timeliness of this work for your lineage - we don't have time to put it off

Quotes

"Awareness isn't enough. Awareness of why we do the things we do and what we're supposed to do to change it is not enough."

"The missing piece in all of this is support."

"If you are listening and you get to be [a unicorn], I want you to actually feel pride in the responsibility that you actually have to be, because we need grounded, attuned, steady adults in our world right now."

"You can only be as compassionate to someone else, you can only love someone else, as much as you are compassionate and love yourself."

"I am walking this walk with you. I am not gonna sit in a circle with you and try to support you in releasing your shame if I haven't been able to do that myself."

"We don't have time to say, I don't have time for that. We don't have time to put it off. And now is the time."

"Why not be the mom that triggers people when you're like, 'You know what? I just don't feel busy. I sleep really well.' You're not saying it to make someone feel bad, but you're being the unicorn."

Resources Mentioned

1. Mothering Ourselves Mindfully - NOW OPEN for enrollment! Learn more at theschoolofmom.com/mom
2. Unsubscribe Integration Call & Replay - Not too late to join! Visit theschoolofmom.com/unsubscribe
3. Alumni & Current Flourish Members - Check your email for your 50% off returning rate
4. Program kicks off the week of February 23rd - 8 weeks of foundational work for thriving as a human

Send Sarah your voice note right here!

SpeakPipe - Send a voice message to theschoolofmom: https://www.speakpipe.com/theschoolofmom

What's Coming Next

Mothering Ourselves Mindfully enrollment is OPEN NOW! This is a very well-established program refined over 6 years with hundreds of women. If you desire to be a mindful human, break cycles in your family, slow down, relinquish control, or drop the resentment - you need support. Come walk with us and be the unicorn your lineage needs.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

1. The two sides of the coin: what you're unsubscribing from and what you're subscribing to
2. Why "saying no to something means saying yes to something else" is a powerful grounding question for boundary-setting
3. How different questions are more accessible depending on your nervous system capacity
4. The Marie Kondo lesson: sometimes "what will I be sad to lose?" is more accessible than "what brings me joy?"
5. Why your ability to access the "what do I desire?" question is actually a reflection of your nervous system's capacity to feel good feelings
6. How many mothers have lost access to feelings of rest, joy, alignment, and groundedness
7. The importance of meeting yourself where you are - whether that's through releasing what you don't want or claiming what you do want
8. How the body speaks in visions, sensations, colors, songs, memories, and images - not just words
9. Practical moments to ask yourself these questions: in bed, in the car, in the shower, drinking your morning coffee

Quotes

"When we are saying no to something, we are saying yes to something else."

"I invite in this question with the very strong disclaimer that you don't always need something. We don't always need to fill the space."

"That's a really cool reflection of where they are because it speaks to the nervous system capacity they have to be in the thing that they want more of."

"The language of the body is very nuanced and sometimes elusive. We need to spend some time with our bodies to really actually tune into that language and understand it."

"You start where you are, you meet yourself where you are at."

Resources Mentioned

1. Unsubscribe Live Event: January 28th, 2026 at 7:15 PM EST - Register at theschoolofmom.com/unsubscribe
2. Send Sarah your voice note right here! SpeakPipe - Send a voice message to https://www.speakpipe.com/theschoolofmom

What's Coming Next

Don't miss our Unsubscribe live event on January 28th! If you're listening after the event, stay tuned for an exciting announcement about what's coming next - we're revealing something special at the closing of the Unsubscribe event.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

1. Understanding "ready enough" - why you're never 100% ready for change and that's okay
2. The stages of change model: denial, pre-contemplation, contemplation, preparation, action, and maintenance/relapse
3. How to move along the readiness spectrum by examining the cost of staying the same versus the cost of changing
4. What mothers are ready to unsubscribe from: hypervigilance, overexplaining, multitasking, self-doubt, shame around asking for help, guilt around saying no, being the emotional load bearer, pressure to hurry, control, managing everything perfectly while ignoring needs, Instagram, social media, group chats, and other people's moods
5. Why you can't just "untick a box" - these patterns are embodied, not just intellectual
6. The importance of cadence and frequency - we don't want to eliminate anxiety completely, we need it at healthy intervals
7. Why we can't be in two nervous system states at once (like shutdown and play simultaneously)
8. What mothers want to subscribe to: rest, sleep, time in flow, trusting intuition, moving slowly, joyfulness with kids, travel, feeling like themselves, soup, puzzles, and the simple things
9. Why releasing the conflicting pattern is required to create space for what we desire

Quotes

"There's very few things in life that we are a hundred percent ready for."

"If you're in the awareness stage and there's some significant discomfort...the discomfort of staying the same is getting more pronounced for you. That is a good indicator that it's time to move, that you are ready, getting more ready to change."

"All of these that we wanna unsubscribe from are programs patterns that were never designed for flourishing or for thriving. These are patterns rooted in stress states and survival states in our bodies and in our nervous systems."

"Thinking can't unwind what lives in the body. Insight is not enough."

"When you're in shutdown, you can't also be in our safety state...That's where play lives, so we can't be in those two places at once."

"We cannot teach something. We cannot model something for someone else if we have not attuned to it and healed it in ourselves."

Resources Mentioned

1. UNSUBSCRIBE Live Event: January 28th in the evening - a 90-minute embodiment experience to unsubscribe from patterns at the physiological, somatic level. Register at https://theschoolofmom.com/unsubscribe
2. Stages of Change Model: Google this helpful framework from the addiction space for understanding readiness to change: https://www.elev8centers.com/blog/stages-of-change-model

Send Sarah your voice note right here!: https://www.speakpipe.com/theschoolofmom

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

1. Why we need to pause and reflect before rushing into the new year
2. Reflection questions to uncover what felt light vs. heavy during the holidays
3. The difference between traditions that nourish vs. those that deplete
4. Understanding the mental and emotional load of "magic-making"
5. How the holidays reveal patterns of over-functioning in mothers
6. The cost of being the default calendar keeper, peacemaker, and emotional load bearer
7. Why reflection without embodied integration keeps you stuck in the same patterns
8. The connection between overwhelm and memory loss in mothers
9. How awareness is just the doorway—the real work happens in the body
10. Why we're releasing the Gregorian calendar's pressure and honoring the Chinese New Year instead

Reflection Questions

1. What felt really light, nourishing, and genuinely joyful?
2. What felt heavy, draining, or performative?
3. When did I feel most alive and lit up like myself?
4. What did I do out of expectation or "shoulds" rather than true desire?
5. What boundaries did I hold or wish I had held?
6. What am I clear I do NOT want to carry into next year's holiday?
7. What felt meaningful enough that I want to repeat or deepen into it?

Quotes

"Every year we might say, 'Oh, I'm never gonna do this again' or 'Next year's gonna be better.' And then 365 days later... here we are again."

"There is some inherited ways of the behind the scenes of the holidays that we never actually signed up for. That we are literally caught up in the rapids of."

"Reflection without integration and embodied release is just you setting yourself up for being in the same patterns next year and just being more aware of them."

"The sooner we can do this, the more present we are in our lives, the more memories we actually have of these great moments with our kids."

"Your nervous system will choose a familiar hell over an unfamiliar heaven every time."

Resources Mentioned

1. UNSUBSCRIBE Live Class - January 28th, 7:15-8:45pm EST: www.theschoolofmom.com/unsubscribe
2. Send Sarah your voice note right here! https://www.speakpipe.com/theschoolofmom

What's Coming Next

Join me on January 28th for UNSUBSCRIBE—a powerful 90-minute embodiment experience where we'll go deeper than awareness and into the body where the patterns actually live. This isn't about managing your overwhelm; it's about releasing it at the root. We're collectively unsubscribing from inherited programming around guilt, resentment, rushing, and over-functioning. This is not a class to do with kids in the room—hire a babysitter, lock the door, maybe gather with a friend. It's free, but it requires your sacred presence and commitment. Let's start the year (the real one, which begins in February with the Chinese New Year) by releasing what's no longer in alignment with who we're becoming.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

1. The distinction between insight (mental understanding) and MOMsight (embodied integration)
2. Why 90-95% of your experience is driven by unconscious programming
3. Understanding that 80% of communication flows from body to brain (not the other way around)
4. The difference between top-down (cognitive) and bottom-up (somatic) approaches to change
5. Why insight can become a way to avoid doing the actual work
6. How nervous system work creates change "underneath the hood" that you'll notice over time
7. The importance of choosing unfamiliar paths even when it feels uncomfortable
8. Why your patterns don't want you to change (familiar feels safe to your nervous system)

Quotes

"Insight is understanding what's happening, but how am I changing this without changing the circumstances that are contributing to my reactivity?"

"Why would I go for the 20% or that five to 10% of consciousness when I can work on the 80% or the 90 to 95% and just change the way I am at baseline?"

"The women in the School of Mom are the women who have the books and they've read them, but when it comes to the reflection questions at the end of the chapter... they don't do it."

"When a mother can see and feel the full dance of the human experience happening in her body, she's no longer a victim to it."

"Your nervous system will choose a familiar hell over an unfamiliar heaven every time."

"We are not gonna pass along another generation of shame. It's not, we can't, ladies, we can't. It's actually not an option."

Resources Mentioned

1. Flourished Mother Starter Kit (5 free nervous system practices): https://theschoolofmom.com/starter
2. UNSUBSCRIBE Live Class - January 28th, 7:15-8:45pm EST: www.theschoolofmom.com/unsubscribe
3. Send Sarah your voice note right here! https://www.speakpipe.com/theschoolofmom

What's Coming Next

Join me on January 28th for UNSUBSCRIBE - a powerful 90-minute gathering where we'll collectively honor the threshold from the year of the snake (releasing/shedding) to the year of the horse. This is not a class to do with kids in the room - hire a babysitter, lock the door, maybe gather with a friend. We'll be releasing the parts of ourselves that are no longer in alignment with who we're becoming. It's free, but it requires your sacred presence and commitment.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

1. Announcing the closing of Parent Wellness Group, a profitable and successful clinical therapy practice
2. Understanding the limitations of talk therapy and why insight alone doesn't create lasting change
3. The profound timing of closing a nine-year cycle that began in 2016 when I started my clinical practice
4. How 2025 (the year of the snake) has been about shedding and releasing old identities
5. Reflecting on the parallel experience of releasing yoga teaching to make space for The School of Mom
6. Why holding onto the therapist identity was keeping me from fully stepping into my purpose
7. The difference between being liked and being effective as a guide for mothers
8. Moving from therapist to embodiment guide - helping women move insight into their bodies
9. Why familiar patterns keep us stuck even when they're no longer serving us
10. What it means to embody your values rather than just understand them intellectually

Quotes

"I cannot authentically be in a group where I am guiding and supporting women to do the scary thing, to step into their next version of how good can it get, if I haven't done this for myself."

"I am no longer interested in listening to women stay stuck in the same patterns that aren't actually serving them. I am no longer available for that."

"We'll choose a familiar hell over an unfamiliar heaven every day."

"I'm no longer responsible for your feelings and I'm not sorry about it. I'm responsible for being a guide to help you be responsible for your feelings."

"You are never gonna get there if you simply think and talk about it."

"To fully embrace and embody the identity that you're becoming, you can't have these competing identities."

Reflection Questions

1. What was happening for you in 2016-2017, and is there something resonating with the completion of this nine-year cycle?
2. What has 2025 asked you to shed or release this year of the snake?
3. What identities, patterns, or ways of living have been keeping you safe but are no longer aligned with who you are becoming?
4. What part of you is familiar and safe but actually in conflict with your next level of flourishing?

What's Coming Next

The podcast will return in January 2026 with a deep dive into the difference between insight (from therapy and meditation) and Mom-Site (embodied nervous system healing work).

Mark Your Calendar

Live Free Gathering: Wednesday, January 28th at 7:45 PM EST - A ritual and ceremonial offering to celebrate and honor our unique thresholds from the year of the snake to the year of the horse. Link coming in the new year.

Send Sarah your voice note right here!: https://www.speakpipe.com/theschoolofmom

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

• Why 50% of your happiness is genetic (your set point), but epigenetics means you can influence gene expression through environment and practices
• The happiness trap of "I'll be happy when..." and why only 10% of happiness is circumstantial
• Understanding affective forecasting: why humans are terrible at predicting future feelings
• Hedonic adaptation and why we return to our baseline happiness after getting the new shiny thing (or new life circumstance)
• The surprising research on money and happiness: there's a threshold where basic needs are met, after which spending matters more than earning
• Why having kids doesn't boost overall happiness (even though it brings moments of joy)
• The 40% solution: science-backed strategies proven to increase happiness that are entirely within your control
• The gap between knowing what's good for you and actually doing it - and why fierce self-compassion is the bridge

The 13+ Science-Backed Happiness Strategies

1. Mindfulness - The foundation woven into all other strategies
2. Gratitude - Expressing gratitude and having a gratitude practice
3. Nurturing relationships - Being intentional about who you spend time with
4. Savoring life's joys - Slowing down to really savor moments
5. Finding meaning - Looking for opportunities for growth and learning in every experience
6. Developing healthier coping strategies - Moving beyond scrolling and stress-eating to more nourishing practices
7. Avoiding overthinking and social comparison - Getting curious about these parts rather than fighting them
8. Practicing compassion and self-compassion - The road all mindfulness leads to
9. Leaning on signature strengths - Identifying and utilizing your top strengths
10. Forgiveness - Releasing resentment for your own wellbeing
11. Doing activities that engage you (Flow) - Finding what makes you lose track of time
12. Taking care of your body - In ways that honor your current season and stage
13. Optimism - Looking on the bright side (or "holloing" it, as my dad would say!)
14. Committing to your goals - Getting clear on what you want and working toward it
15. Faith and spirituality - Connecting to something bigger than yourself

Quotes

"We don't need to feel better. We need to get better at feeling." - Gabor Maté

"Happiness is really an inside job."

"There is a gap between what you know is good for you, what brings you happiness, and what you're actually doing."

"Forgiveness is the gift you give yourself."

"Life is happening for us, not to us."

"You're the product of the people you spend the most time with."

"We cannot practice mindfulness authentically without practicing kindness and compassion. All roads lead to self-compassion."

Resources Mentioned

• Project 40 happiness initiative at Wentworth Institute of Technology: https://sites.wit.edu/witdeans/archives/311 
• Sonja Lyubomirsky - happiness researcher: https://thehowofhappiness.com/ 
• Martin Seligman - UPenn positive psychology researcher: https://ppc.sas.upenn.edu/people/martin-ep-seligman 
• Kristin Neff - self-compassion.org: https://self-compassion.org/ 
• VIA Character Strengths Assessment (free): https://www.viacharacter.org/ 
• Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi - Flow research: https://mlpp.pressbooks.pub/mavlearn/chapter/flow-theory/ 
• Take the Inner Voice Quiz - Discover your dominant inner voice: http://theschoolofmom.com/quiz 
• Join The School of MOM: https://theschoolofmom.com/waitlist 
• Send Sarah your voice note right here!: https://www.speakpipe.com/theschoolofmom

Series Recap

Episode 1: Feeling It All - We don't need to feel better, we need to get better at feeling. To feel happiness deeply, we must also feel sadness, grief, and all 87 emotions (not just the 3 most people can name).

Episode 2: Getting Clear on What You Want - Before you can create happiness, you need to know what it actually looks, feels, and smells like for you. Specificity matters.

Episode 3: The Science of Happiness - Understanding the research behind what actually makes us happier and implementing science-backed strategies that fit your life.

Thank you for joining us for this three-part Happier Holidays series. Which happiness strategy resonates most with you? Send me a voice note and let me know!

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

I'll guide you through a visualization exercise to imagine your ideal holiday season, help you identify the internal parts (like "Cynical Sally") that might try to shut down your dreaming, and challenge you to get specific about what happiness actually looks, feels, and sounds like for you during this season.

Key Points

• Moving beyond the generic goal of "being happy" to get specific about what a happier holiday season actually means for you
• The importance of having a clear vision—if you don't know what you want, how can you work toward it?
• Using your imagination to dream into your ideal holiday scenario: floating through the season in your mind and noticing what makes it feel good
• Recognizing the protective parts of yourself (like "Cynical Sally" or "Inner Beth") that try to squash your dreams with "realistic" objections
• Learning to acknowledge these cynical parts while asking them to step aside: "Can we just dream a little bit?"
• Understanding that these protective parts keep us in what's familiar because familiar feels safe—even when it keeps us stuck
• Getting specific about your vision using all five senses: What does your happier holiday look, taste, sound, feel, and smell like?
• Recognizing that happiness is a spectrum—from quiet contentment to euphoric joy—not just the big moments
• The contentment side of the happiness spectrum is often happening around us but we're missing it, and it's much easier to create than euphoric moments
• Asking yourself: "Who do I need to become to have this happier holiday?"
• Becoming the person for whom a happy holiday is non-negotiable—someone who knows they deserve and are worthy of the holiday they dream of

Quotes

"What do you want? No, but what do you really want?"

"Half the time we want, or we think we want to be happier and to have a happier holiday. But like what do you really want? Like what does that mean?"

"If I don't have this awareness with her and give her an option, these parts of ourselves—they're so rooted in their protection of us—they wanna keep us in what's familiar because what's familiar is safe."

"If you can imagine it, it is possible. If the dream is in you, it is for you."

"You want to be the person where a happy holiday is non-negotiable for you. That's just what you do."

"When I do this exercise and I think about happier holidays, it really doesn't have anything to do with the big, monumental, euphoric experiences. It has everything to do with the quiet moments."

Resources Mentioned

• Take the Inner Voice Quiz: theschoolofmom.com/quiz - Discover your dominant inner voice that gets in the way of thriving: http://theschoolofmom.com/quiz 
• Join The School of MOM: https://theschoolofmom.com/waitlist
• Send Sarah your voice note right here! https://www.speakpipe.com/theschoolofmom 

What's Coming Next

Next week, I'll be diving into the science of happiness—exploring what happiness actually is from a research perspective, and how understanding the specifics can help us create our happier holidays. I'll be sharing insights from my early work as a therapist when I developed Project 40 at Wentworth, a happiness initiative that won a college association award.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

• Why grief often surfaces during the holidays, especially when traditions and family gatherings highlight absence or loss
• Understanding that we can't selectively numb emotions—when we shut down grief and sadness, we also lose access to joy and contentment
• The metaphor of grief as a wave: it will pass through if we allow it, but resistance keeps us stuck
• How emotions have a 90-second shelf life when we fully allow ourselves to feel them without resistance
• The difference between healthy emotional release and unhealthy coping mechanisms (alcohol, sugar, shopping) that create false happiness
• Why we need to "get better at feeling" rather than "feel better"—learning to be with all 87 human emotions
• Creating safe spaces to feel big emotions: cars, closets, bathrooms, or with trusted people who can witness without judgment
• How showing appropriate emotion in front of our children teaches them emotional health while maintaining safety
• The power of connection with others who understand grief—you don't need to have experienced the exact same loss
• Setting boundaries around triggering traditions, people, or rituals to protect your tender heart during the season

Quotes

"Grief is kinda like that random hair on my chest—I know it's coming, but I don't necessarily know when."

"We don't need to feel better. We need to get better at feeling." — Gabor Maté

"If we can't be with and feel our waves of unpleasant emotions like grief, it's gonna be really hard to be in the pleasant emotions of joy and contentment and ease."

"You can't pick and choose. If we don't feel sad, if we don't feel angry, we're gonna struggle to feel happy."

"Emotions are energy in motion—these neurochemical processes that when given permission to move will move through you like a train through a tunnel."

"If we ignore, deny, and resist our feelings of anger, sadness, and grief that are inevitable around the holidays, we will not have a happier holiday—or we will numb out with really unhealthy coping skills and have the illusion of a happy holiday."

Resources Mentioned

• Atlas of the Heart by Brené Brown—an encyclopedia of the 87 emotions we experience as humans: https://a.co/d/800nADj 
• The School of Mom community—holding space for women to feel emotions without shame: https://theschoolofmom.com/ 

What's Coming Next

More episodes in the HappIER Holidays series exploring how to bring intention and genuine happiness to the season by working with our nervous systems rather than against them.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

• Understanding that organizing and order in your life is not about perfection—perfection is the highest form of self-abuse
• Getting clear on who you're actually buying gifts for and having honest conversations with family about simplifying gift exchanges
• Starting holiday shopping early by blocking one hour per week beginning in September to order gifts gradually
• The game-changing strategy of wrapping gifts as they arrive rather than waiting for December 24th
• Creating a mobile wrapping station (three-tier cart) with all supplies in one accessible place
• The power of active listening throughout the year to discover meaningful gifts that make people feel seen
• How to avoid the last-minute "I don't have enough" panic by planning stockings alongside regular gift purchases
• Setting up your home for hosting success: preparing guest rooms thoughtfully, creating designated zones (snack station, coffee station), and clearing spaces before guests arrive
• The importance of delegating tasks and letting go of control over things you care less about
• Making your own well-being the non-negotiable priority on holiday mornings
• Focusing on the feeling and experience you want to create rather than perfect execution of every detail
• Treating December as a meditation to notice what works and what doesn't for future planning

Quotes

"Organizing and order in your life is not about perfection because perfection is the highest form of self-abuse."

"We all wanna feel validated and seen. We wanna love and be loved in return. Giving a gift that says, I listen to you, I hear you—that's what matters."

"The thing that we have absolutely no time for is the one thing we very much need, which is the time for ourselves."

"You're always gonna remember how people make you feel. It's the feeling you're going for, not the perfection."

"What would it be like to go into the holidays with your enjoyment and ease factor being the number one priority?"

"It is not possible to do all of this stuff in the four weeks leading up to the holiday. I refuse to do it to myself anymore."

Resources Mentioned

• Good Order Professional Organizing: https://www.goodorderllc.com/ (serving North Shore and Cape Ann areas)
• Three-tier rolling cart for wrapping supplies: https://a.co/d/hOlQvTJ 

What's Coming Next

Continue exploring how to create intentional, nourishing experiences during the holiday season by putting your well-being first and letting go of perfectionism.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

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I talk about why the words "morning routine" trigger so many moms, the reality of our cyclical nature as women, and how giving yourself radical permission to listen to your body can actually be more transformative than any prescribed 5 AM wake-up call.

Key Points

The Morning Routine Trigger

• Why "morning routine" feels loaded and sometimes rage-inducing for mothers
• The unpredictability of kids, sleep, and early motherhood years
• How non-parent providers often suggest morning routines without understanding the reality
• The loss of freedom, spontaneity, and time that triggers us

Why Traditional Morning Routines Don't Work

• The expectation that every morning should look the same isn't realistic
• Female bodies are cyclical beings - not designed for rigid daily sameness
• How seasons affect our energy and morning capacity differently
• The resistance that comes from trying to force the same routine in winter as summer

Introducing the Cyclical Start

• Honoring the rhythms of your own body, the season, and your stage of motherhood
• Giving yourself permission for mornings to look different day to day and week to week
• Letting your body decide what it needs rather than following a prescription
• How this approach reduces guilt and increases self-trust

Releasing Rigid Prescriptions

• The journey from rigid rules about exercise, eating, and routines to body wisdom
• The freedom of stopping alarm clocks and letting your body wake naturally (when possible)
• Some days waking at 5 AM, other days sleeping until 7 - and both being okay
• Connecting to natural rhythms like moon cycles and seasons

The Bikram Yoga Parallel

• Starting with rigid 26-posture Bikram practice as a "safe" structure
• Getting reprimanded for drinking water and leaving early
• The wake-up call that rigid prescriptions can harm rather than help
• Questioning where routines you once loved are now draining you

Radical Permission

• What if you gave yourself permission to sleep in every time?
• Trusting that your body knows what it needs
• How radical rest often leads to natural energy returning
• The difference between forcing yourself versus naturally waking with energy

Quotes

"Morning routine: why those two words are triggering on many levels."

"The reality is -  every morning looking the same - I have come to find is not realistic... and it's actually not really in line with a female's body."

"Starting cyclically means first you're honoring the rhythms of your own body, but also the season and the stage of motherhood and life that you're in."

"What if you gave yourself radical permission to just sleep in and skip the thing that you've been forcing yourself to wake up for?"

"When you feel the natural rhythms, you're more and more connected to your body and what it needs on a given day."

"Where is your body saying, 'Hey, this routine isn't really working for me'?"

Reflection Questions

• What happens in your body when you hear the words "morning routine"?
• Are you forcing a morning practice that's actually draining you rather than energizing you?
• What would radical permission look like for your mornings right now?
• Where in your life are you following prescriptions that no longer serve your body or season of life?
• What would it feel like to let your body decide when to wake up?

What's Next

This concept of the cyclical start is part of the School of Mom's work around awakening the cyclical celebrator - trusting the process and honoring natural rhythms. More insights from the book coming soon!

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

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I'm taking you behind the scenes of how the School of MOM has evolved since launching on Mother's Day 2020, why we're bringing back a cohort-based learning model, and what this means for women who have been waiting for the right entry point into this work.

Key Points

The Journey From Then to Now

• How the School of Mom launched in May 2020 with the original "Mothering Oneself Mindfully" program
• The incredible women who have been on this journey from day one and witnessed every evolution
• How my own learning and understanding has deepened over five years - from mindfulness and self-compassion to nervous system healing and awakening the flourished mother
• The intentional shift from "oneself" to "ourselves" and what it means for this work

Why We're Bringing Back a Cohort Model

• The challenge of self-paced learning: we all have the best intentions, but life happens
• The difference between having access to content versus actually integrating it into your life
• The power of walking through curriculum together as a cohort at the same time
• How community bonds and accountability make the learning stick
• Why some of us (myself included!) simply don't do programs unless there's a live component

What Makes Learning Actually Work

• Why watching videos on 3x speed while doing dishes doesn't create transformation
• The magic that happens in small group reflection and integration
• How asking "What did I learn? How am I going to walk this forward?" creates embodied change
• The School of Mom isn't here to dump information - it's here to help you integrate and actually become the human you're thinking about being

The Structure of Mothering Ourselves Mindfully

• A nine-week foundational program starting February 2026
• Live teaching from me on the core components: mindfulness, self-compassion, and nervous system foundations
• Small groups for reflection, integration, and bringing teachings to life
• Access to all modules plus the accountability and support to actually use them
• Think of it as "freshman year" - your entry point with your cohort of people

The Flourished Mother Starter Kit

• Five nervous system practices to stop passing down stress to your kids
• A way to start dabbling in this work before enrollment opens
• Available now when you join the waitlist

For Current Community Members and Alumni

• Gratitude for the women who have been with me through every iteration
• An invitation to share this opportunity with women in your life who've been asking "what's that thing you do?"
• Alumni welcome to return and deepen their practice - you're different now, I'm different now, the teachings have evolved
• The power of doing this work multiple times at different seasons of life

Quotes

"I've been fascinated with how the space that is the internet could create connection... I'm really passionate about the structure of our programs."

"I've really journeyed with the women that have been with me from the beginning. But in doing that, I've left behind, on some level, the women that have been ready and waiting to begin their own journey."

"We can all listen to things on three times speed in the background while we're doing the dishes and thinking about 17 things that we have to do, but we're not really getting that information and we're definitely not integrating it into our lives."

"The integration happens when you actually pause and you say, what did I learn? What do I think about what I learned? How am I gonna walk forward and integrate in my body and my habits what I just learned?"

"The School of Mom is not just here to dump more information at people. It is here to help you integrate and actually be the human that you are thinking about being."

"It's bloody brilliant." (Yes, I said that and I'm not even British!)

"Each time they did it, it really deepened their understanding. They were able to learn and actually receive more and they were at a different season and stage of their lives."

Resources Mentioned

Mothering Ourselves Mindfully Program

• Enrollment opens January 2026
• Program starts February 2026
• Nine weeks of live teaching and small group integration
• Sign up for the waitlist: https://theschoolofmom.com/waitlist

The Flourished Mother Starter Kit

• Five nervous system practices to stop passing down stress to your kids
• Free when you join the waitlist
• Download directly at: https://theschoolofmom.com/start

What's Coming Next

Enrollment for Mothering Ourselves Mindfully opens in January 2026, with the program beginning in February 2026. This is the first time in years we've opened doors for a cohort-based foundational program, so if you've been following along and wondering where to start - this is it. Join the waitlist at theschoolofmom.com/waitlist to be the first to know when doors open and to get immediate access to the Flourished Mother Starter Kit

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

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I'm talking about what it really means to "deal with our own shit" - the uncomfortable inner work of facing our inner critic, anxiety, perfectionism, and strained relationships. And why, as much as we want shortcuts, there's no way around actually doing the work ourselves.

Key Points

The Compost Toilet Metaphor

• The unexpected reality of a rustic retreat center with self-sustaining practices
• My initial resistance and feelings of unfairness about this task
• How one retreat participant helped shift my perspective with humor and companionship
• The bigger metaphor hiding in an uncomfortable weekend experience

Why We Avoid Our Own "Stuff"

• We'd rather flush our problems away than see, smell, or relate to them
• The inner critic, anxiety, perfectionism, and maternal relationship wounds we avoid
• The "why do I have to be the one?" complaint we all feel
• Wanting others to take out our metaphorical shit instead of owning it ourselves

The Resistance IS the Invitation

• Rumi's wisdom: "The wound is where the light enters"
• Seeing discomfort, conflict, and pain as teachers rather than problems
• How vulnerability in community creates powerful transformation
• What the women at the retreat courageously faced and felt

What Are You Avoiding?

• The uncomfortable parts of yourself driving your life's bus
• Inner critics, doubt, fear, resistance, resentment, and anger that need attention
• The difference between what we can delegate vs. what we must face ourselves
• Why curiosity and kindness are essential when relating to our difficult parts

The Power of Not Doing It Alone

• Community as witness and companion in difficult inner work
• How shared experience provides perspective when you're in the thick of it
• The importance of bringing someone in - therapist, friend, or loved one
• Being witnessed with compassion so you can actually release what no longer serves

The Transformation: From Waste to Nutrients

• Understanding that nothing is truly waste - it all becomes fuel for growth
• The humanure pile metaphor: how our "shit" feeds the ecosystem
• Alchemy, transformation, and reclamation in real time
• How our wounds become the nutrients that help new things flourish

Quotes

"You can't build the muscle if you don't go to the gym. You have to actually do the reps yourself."

"The wound is where the light enters." - Rumi

"When we actually see our stuff, when we put our shit out there, it can be the thing that allows us to throw it in the pile."

"What is the uncomfortable shit that you are avoiding looking at, being in, relating to, and really taking ownership for?"

"It is not fun ever, or effective or helpful most of the time to do this alone."

"When we really see our shit as the wound where the light enters, we realize that it can transform into nutrients."

"It's never waste. It is fuel and it is nutrients that helps other things to grow."

Reflection Questions

• What uncomfortable inner work are you trying to flush away without facing?
• What parts of yourself are you wanting to outsource that actually need your attention?
• Who could you invite into witness your process with compassion?
• Where is the resistance in your life actually pointing toward your growth?

What's Next

More retreat reflections coming soon - stay tuned for deeper insights from this transformative weekend with courageous mothers doing the work.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

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In this episode, we explore:

• The shift from independence to vulnerability: Why asking for help isn't weakness, it's wisdom
• What support actually feels like (hint: it's that sigh of relief when you can just breathe)
• Creative ways to build community when you're far from family or naturally introverted
• Why the "veteran mom" stage can actually be harder to find support
• The mental load conversation: dividing household tasks and knowing when to pay for help
• Self-care as a non-negotiable: filling your own cup so you can pour into others
• How tribal communities got it right—and what we've lost in modern American culture

Key takeaway: We aren't meant to mother alone. Whether it's finding your people through fitness classes, baby groups, or online communities like School of Mom, or investing in paid support like doulas, housekeepers, or laundry services—building your village is essential at every stage.

About Kristin Revere: Kristin Revere is the owner and founder of Gold Coast Doulas in Grand Rapids, Michigan. She is an elite certified birth doula, a newborn care specialist, a childbirth educator, and an elite certified postpartum doula. She is the co-author of "Supported: Your Guide to Birth and Baby" and host of Ask the Doulas. She is a mom of two and bonus mom to one. 

Resources mentioned:

• Book: "Supported: Your Guide to Birth and Baby" by Kristin Revere: https://a.co/d/4zLvWPN 
• Gold Coast Doulas services and virtual classes: https://www.goldcoastdoulas.com/ 
• School of Mom community: https://theschoolofmom.com/

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

I'm introducing the Flourished Mother Starter Kit: Five Nervous System Practices to Stop Passing Down Stress to Your Kids - a resource born from listening to my community's overwhelming desire to break the cycle and do the deeper nervous system healing work.

Key Points

The Generational Pattern You Can't Unsee

• That moment when you catch yourself reacting exactly like your mom (or her mom)
• Why you're running on programming that was never really yours to begin with
• Understanding that your current patterns aren't your fault - but they are your responsibility
• The crack is where the light seeps through: reactivity as opportunity, not flaw

Why Your Kids Don't Need a Perfect Mom

• The impossible goal of perfection and what it teaches our children
• What your kids actually need: a regulated mom who is comfortable in her own skin
• Shifting from "what's wrong with me?" to celebrating your awareness
• Moving from quick fixes to looking underneath the hood at the root

Why the Nervous System Comes First

• When your nervous system is stuck in survival mode (fight, flight, freeze, fawn), showing up as the mom you want to be is nearly impossible
• We react in milliseconds - before we can pause, assess, or choose consciously
• Stress, trauma, and programming live in our nervous system, not just our minds
• The good news: once we understand how patterns are imprinted in our biology, we can rewire them

The Problem with Mindset Work

• Only 5-10% of our experience is conscious (where mindset work lives)
• 90-95% is unconscious and subconscious - driven by our body and nervous system
• The fire hose metaphor: trying to control thoughts as they spray out vs. changing the source of the water
• Why we need to focus on "body set" not just mindset to create lasting change

The Five Nervous System Practices Overview

1. The Radical Mom Pause - Interrupting mindless, unconscious loops by bringing your body out of autopilot and into the present moment. Awareness through breath, softening, and meeting your needs in real-time.
2. Two Words: "Of Course" - When you notice yourself in an unwanted pattern, saying "of course this is where I'm at - this is my biology" interrupts self-blame and invites compassion. This shifts you from defensiveness into connection and safety.
3. Self-Compassion and Repair - After a triggered moment, offering yourself compassion first (understanding the context of why you reacted) before repairing with your child. This is cycle-breaking in real time - modeling emotional resiliency and teaching that mistakes are part of being human.
4. Be the Compassionate Presence Your Inner Child Needs - Learning to be the resource for your younger parts that may have never had that grounding presence. Understanding co-regulation: we self-regulate through relationship, and healing happens in relationship because trauma happens in relationship.
5. Awakening the Flourished Mother in You - Connecting to your nervous system's safety state where compassion, playfulness, joy, and curiosity live. When we tune into the grounded, connected, resourced state, the stress naturally falls away. We're training our nervous system to recognize safety as familiar.

The Ancestor Wisdom on Fixation

• The profound message about how we fixate on problems (anxiety, stress, perfectionism)
• When we tap into playfulness and resourced states, the fixating dissipates on its own
• Why focusing on stress alone misses half the equation in nervous system healing

Quotes

"Your kids don't need a perfect mom. They need a regulated one."

"When you react, it's not a flaw, it's just your biology. It's not a personal weakness."

"We can't always be conscious to try to override our programming. That's like mindset work means that we're really working hard to override our programming in the moment."

"We cannot change what we're not aware of. So it all starts with the pause."

"Of course, this is what I'm feeling because what I'm feeling is what I'm feeling."

"Repair is probably the most important part of parenting, conscious parenting."

"Healing happens in relationship because trauma happens in relationship."

"When we tap into the playfulness, the fixating dissipates on its own."

"When we tune into the grounded connected resource state, the stress falls away."

Resources Mentioned

• The Flourished Mother Starter Kit - Download at http://www.theschoolofmom.com/start 
• The Radical Mom Pause Toolkit - A free resource within the starter kit
• Books mentioned: Carol Dweck's Mindset and Angela Duckworth's work on growth mindset: https://a.co/d/0IhsT3Z and https://a.co/d/c4D4Z8F 
• Yoga Tune Up therapy balls for awakening grounded states in the body

What's Coming Next

The School of Mom waitlist is officially open! In the new year, I'm bringing back our original program from 2020: Mothering Ourselves Mindfully - a nine-week program where you can actually integrate these five nervous system practices into your life and embody this work in community. Because getting a handout is one thing; living it, being it, and embodying it is another. Sign up at theschoolofmom.com/waitlist (or get just the starter kit at theschoolofmom.com/start).

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

What's "Normal" Anyway?

• Why comparing your sex life to others is both tempting and unhelpful
• The truth: frequency matters less than how both partners feel about it
• The single biggest issue that brings couples to sex therapy: difference in desire
• Understanding spontaneous desire vs. responsive desire
• Why cultural stereotypes about sex drive create additional pain

The High Desire/Low Desire Dynamic

• How testosterone influences spontaneous desire (typically higher in men)
• Why responsive desire means needing to feel aroused before feeling desire
• The reality that desire levels can flip and change cyclically
• What happens when both partners have low desire
• How resentment builds when there's a mismatch in initiation

The Mental Load of Sex

• Moving beyond "what's wrong with me?" and "did I marry the wrong person?"
• Why obligation sex is deeply unsatisfying for both partners
• How sex becomes a "hot button issue" that couples can't even discuss
• Understanding that frequency doesn't tell the whole story
• The panic spiral: counting days and feeling the pressure build

Communication Is Foreplay

• Why the low desire partner often avoids initiating any physical contact
• The problem with waiting for your partner to initiate what you want
• How to be clear about desires: "I want to cuddle tonight, just cuddle"
• Why attunement to your partner's needs builds connection
• The importance of both partners being allowed to ask for what they want

Outside the Bedroom Matters

• How emotional presence and connection throughout the day impacts desire
• Why acts of service can be genuine foreplay
• The need for effort and attunement, not just one-off gestures
• Understanding that it's not the high desire partner's job alone to create the right environment
• How being on the same team translates to better intimacy

Cyclical Desire and Power Struggles

• Recognizing how menstrual cycles affect desire levels
• What happens when desire suddenly flips: "Now you want it?"
• How resentment can create complicated dynamics around initiation
• The importance of flexibility and meeting each other where you are

The Sensate Focus Approach

• Taking typical intercourse off the table to unlock authentic desire
• Why prohibition often leads to "cheating" (which means it's working!)
• How the lower desire partner experiences relief when pressure is removed
• Discovering what you actually want when the formula is disrupted
• The connection between expressing needs outside vs. inside the bedroom

Owning Your Own Desire

• The challenge many women face in knowing what they want
• Understanding you're not just a vessel for your partner's desire
• Getting clear on what actually turns you on or creates connection
• Why knowing what you don't want is actually valuable information
• The work of stepping into ownership rather than just being responsive

The Vulnerability Factor

• Why shame is one of the biggest blocks to healthy sexuality
• How sex unlocks vulnerability for both partners
• The importance of showing up authentically, even when it's hard
• What happens when one partner shows up beautifully but the other can't meet them there
• Building tolerance for the cycle of connection and disconnection

Quotes

"What actually matters is how everybody in the relationship feels about the frequency."

"The worst thing that we want is the thing that would be really scary is that our partners wouldn't want to be with us anymore."

"You are avoiding initiating what you want because it doesn't feel like you're going to be able to get what you want."

"The low desire partner never gets to ask for what they want."

"When we say what we want and someone hears us and respects that, it fills a connection piece."

"Skills don't always translate. I can do it for couples because you can see so clearly what's happening with somebody else. But when it comes to your own relationship... I don't particularly enjoy being vulnerable."

"Beginning from a place of curiosity... take the best possible interpretation."

"The more defensive you are, the less you have your own back."

Resources Mentioned

• Parents in Love by Rebecca Howard Eudy - Available for pre-order, releases October 2025: https://a.co/d/2FBxhC2 
• Rebecca's website: http://rebeccaeudy.com/
• Rebecca’s Instagram, @rebeccahowardeudy: https://www.instagram.com/rebeccahowardeudy/ 
• Rebecca’s Substack, @parentsinlove: https://substack.com/@parentsinlove 
• The importance of couples therapy (both Sarah and Rebecca are advocates!)

What's Coming Next

Start by getting curious about your own desire - not just sexual desire, but what you actually want in moments of physical connection. Are you avoiding initiating because you're afraid you won't get what you want? Have an honest conversation with your partner about what connection means to you, both in and out of the bedroom. Remember: there's nothing wrong with you, and you're not alone in navigating these challenges. Every couple faces misattunements and misunderstandings - the key is approaching them with curiosity rather than defensiveness.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

The Time Scarcity Trap

• Why "I don't have time" is probably the biggest belief we carry as mothers
• Understanding that we had more spontaneity and ease before becoming moms
• How unconscious programming around how we "should" spend our time takes over
• Recognizing that self-care is usually the first thing to go when life gets chaotic

Making Time vs. Having Time

• The hard truth: It's not that you don't have time, it's that you're not making time for it
• How the book-writing process revealed this pattern in real-time
• Writing 73,000 words in the cracks: 15-minute sessions and longer chunks when possible
• Learning to trust the process rather than forcing productivity

Auditing Your Priorities

• Examining the hierarchy: kids, work, self-care, relationships
• Asking yourself if there's congruence between what matters and where your time goes
• Understanding that you don't need to spend all open hours with your children
• Sometimes having childcare just to go for a walk is enough

The Silent Retreat Example

• Going offline for a full week as a mom: the ultimate "I don't have time" scenario
• How people say "that sounds great, but I could never make that work"
• The truth: I don't have time for it either, but I make it a priority
• Quality of presence after time away is infinitely more impactful than constant physical presence

Reframing the Narrative

• Moving from "I don't have time" to "I'm not making time" changes everything
• Avoiding extreme examples to feed into time scarcity beliefs
• Getting out of all-or-nothing thinking: Can you do this in short chunks?
• Asking yourself: If I was going to make time for it right now, what would that look like?

Your Legacy Project

• Deciding what your personal version of "the book" is
• What lights you up or feels like a deep desire?
• Why are you letting everyone else's needs take priority over this?
• Understanding that no one will hand you extra hours on a golden platter

Integration Practices

• Curiously and compassionately ask yourself: Is this true? Do I not have time or am I just not making time?
• Identify what you're saying yes to that could become a no
• Notice where time scarcity shows up in your body
• Mother that scarcity belief with curiosity, compassion, and discernment
• Make a choice to actually make time for what matters to you

Quotes

"It is not that you don't have time for it, it is that you are not making time for it."

"It is the time for me to make this a priority in my life because no one is gonna hand over on a golden platter these extra hours."

"The quality of presence with my kids, because of that time away, is infinitely more impactful than not going."

"Challenge this scarcity belief in you. Tune into where you feel it in your body. Mother it in yourself."

Resources Mentioned

• The School of Mom community: https://theschoolofmom.com/
• Mothering Ourselves First Reset: https://www.motheringourselvesmindfully.com/spaces/21046517/about

What's Coming Next

Identify one thing you've been telling yourself you don't have time for. Get honest about whether it's truly a time issue or a priority issue. Then ask yourself: If I was going to make time for this thing that matters to me, what would that look like? Remember, you don't need perfect conditions or endless hours. You just need to decide it matters enough to rearrange your priorities and make some hard choices.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

The Three Most Powerful Words

• Why "I love myself" are the three most powerful words in the English language
• Understanding the difference between saying these words and truly embodying them
• How most women struggle with self-criticism and self-hate instead of genuine self-love
• The challenge of receiving compassion versus easily giving it to others
• Working through the protective parts that resist self-love and self-compassion

Your Energy Speaks First

• How to be the woman whose energy speaks before she enters the room
• Understanding that 55% of communication is body language, with words being the smallest percentage
• The concept of limbic resonance and how we catch each other's energy
• Examining what your body unconsciously communicates when you walk into a room
• The story of Thich Nhat Hanh commanding presence without words in Boston's Copley Square

Programming for Flourishing

• Recognizing that you're programmed for both survival and flourishing
• Understanding why survival programming is stronger and more automatic
• How the neural pathways we travel most become the most pronounced
• Learning to tap into your inherent programming for thriving and presence
• Working consciously to strengthen flourishing pathways over survival patterns

Rewriting Your Story

The Legacy Question

• Asking yourself: "What story are they going to tell about you?"
• Understanding that you get to write this story through your daily choices
• Moving beyond victimhood narratives to ones of empowerment and growth
• How your story influences generations of people around you
• The ripple effect of embodying self-love in coffee shops, with colleagues, and in community

Breaking Generational Patterns

• Rewriting programming around doubt and self-worth in family lineages
• Choosing to prioritize self-care unapologetically as a model for children
• Understanding that your impact is a direct reflection of how you spend time with yourself
• Moving from survival-mode parenting to conscious, present mothering

Taking Up Space

Done Apologizing

• We're done apologizing for taking up space and playing small
• Understanding the programming that makes us shrink when we enter rooms
• Rewriting narratives around our worthiness to be seen and heard
• The goal of being like "Shavasana" for people - communicating presence, compassion, and confidence

Integration Practices

• Examining your relationship with the words "I love myself" and what comes up
• Noticing what your body language communicates before you speak
• Identifying the people in your life who support your flourishing versus survival programming
• Considering what story you want your loved ones to tell about you
• Practicing presence and self-worth as gifts to your community

Quotes

"The three most powerful words in the English language are, I love myself."

"Be the woman whose energy speaks before she enters the room."

"You're programmed for flourishing. You are. You just need to learn how to actually tap into that program."

"What story are they going to tell about you? You get to write it."

"We're done apologizing for taking up space, we're done playing small."

Resources Mentioned

• Robin Arzon Peloton class from 2020 (challenging 20-minute ride): https://members.onepeloton.com/classes/cycling?utm_source=ios_app&utm_medium=in_app&modal=classDetailsModal&classId=bb87ae4e531342bdbc915e30a63972c3&code=OTE5OGNmZTAyMDkwNDc1NWJjY2EyZWI2YzFmOGJlY2N8NzQyOGJhYjMzODA0NDJlNDhhZWVmNDQwMTIyNDdlYmU%3D&locale=en-US 
• The School of Mom community: https://theschoolofmom.com/  
• Mothering Ourselves First Reset: https://www.motheringourselvesmindfully.com/spaces/21046517/about 

What's Coming Next

Challenge yourself to embody the three most powerful words: "I love myself." Notice what your energy communicates before you enter rooms, and begin consciously writing the story you want others to tell about you. Remember that you're programmed for flourishing - it's time to strengthen those neural pathways and step into the fullness of who you're meant to be.

Key Points

• Why the "fill your own cup" metaphor is too restrictive and prescriptive for mothers who need unlimited nourishment
• The problems with the oxygen mask analogy and why it assumes we're living in constant crisis mode
• How maternal biology and protective instincts clash with rational self-care advice
• Understanding the difference between actual emergencies and perceived crises in daily motherhood
• Why we need to get out of survival mode to access the discernment needed for true self-care
• The importance of tending to our nervous systems to stop living in constant activated states

The Tree Metaphor: A Better Way Forward

• How trees unapologetically take in everything they need - sunlight, water, nutrients - without guilt or limitation
• Understanding that a thriving tree naturally creates oxygen, shelter, and nourishment for its entire ecosystem
• Rejecting the zero-sum game mentality that pits your wellbeing against your family's
• Recognizing that your health becomes your community's health when you're truly nourished
• Embracing the interconnected web of life where receiving and giving flow naturally

Getting to Know Your Inner Selves

• Why we need to understand the parts of ourselves that live in survival states
• The four dominant parts: inner anxiety, the over-planner/perfectionist, inner shame/critic, and the shut-down negative part
• How these survival-mode selves drive our decisions and keep us stuck in patterns of self-neglect
• The process of learning to mother these inner parts with curious, kind, and loving attention

Moving Beyond Survival Mode

• How to distinguish between actual crises and everyday challenges that feel overwhelming
• The importance of slowing down to see how survival patterns keep us ignoring our needs
• Why we need conscious pauses to begin rewiring automatic responses
• Creating space away from triggering circumstances to unwind and calm the nervous system

Integration Practices

• Taking the quiz at https://theschoolofmom.com/quiz to identify your dominant inner parts
• Considering retreat experiences for deeper nervous system regulation work
• Practicing the tree mindset: receiving nourishment without guilt while naturally giving to others
• Questioning why self-care advice isn't working and looking at root causes rather than symptoms

Quotes

"Fuck filling your own cup. You're not an inert plastic object. Put away the cup and think of yourself more like a tree instead."

"If I was up in a plane that was going down, I would not put my own oxygen mask on first. I wouldn't."

"We need to be the cyclical beings of nature that we are as women."

Resources Mentioned

• Quiz to identify inner parts: https://theschoolofmom.com/quiz 
• Nourish retreats: https://theschoolofmom.com/nourish 
• Simone Grace Seol's email inspiration: https://blog.simonegraceseol.com/inspiration-category/ 

What's Coming Next

Challenge yourself to question the self-care advice that isn't working for you and explore what it means to be like a tree - taking in unlimited nourishment so you can naturally give back to your entire ecosystem without depletion or resentment.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

• Why healing and somatic work takes time to integrate - our bodies are nature and change happens in seasons, not overnight
• The difference between male and female hormonal cycles and why women need longer to process and integrate change
• How years of "pulling weeds" and tending to our inner soil eventually creates beautiful blooms of presence and capacity
• Why the common thread in joyful summer moments was nature and time away from children
• The importance of being intentional about what we pay attention to through all our senses
• Why community accountability is essential - we're not meant to figure this out alone

The Integration Journey

• Understanding that a male hormonal cycle is 24 hours while a female cycle is 28 days - we have only 12 cycles per year
• How the garden analogy applies: we plant seeds, tend the soil of our nervous system, and eventually see growth
• Why expecting instant results goes against our cyclical nature as women
• The difference between having great moments with our kids and needing intentional time away from them

Mothering Ourselves First: The 10-Day Reset

• Why putting ourselves at the top of our priority list benefits everyone
• How 10 minutes a day can create an upward spiral of positive choices
• Three reasons why this timing is perfect: fresh start energy of fall, disrupted summer routines, and current world heaviness
• The power of community support in maintaining consistent self-care practices

Nervous System and Current Events

• How traumatic news can put us into freeze/shutdown mode after prolonged anxiety
• Why we can't help anyone - including our children - when we're in survival mode
• The conscious practices needed to drop our shoulders, release our jaw, and exhale deeply
• Understanding that self-care is actually the opposite of selfish

Quotes

"Not taking care of yourself is what's selfish."

"A male hormonal cycle is 24 hours. A female hormonal cycle is 28-ish days, and we have 12 of them in a year."

"The seeds that I planted many years ago... didn't grow overnight. I had to plant them and really tend to the soil and nurture them and take care of them, and now they're growing."

"If you really want to be an instrument of change, a compassionate presence for those that you love and those that you wanna help, then you must take care of yourself."

Resources Mentioned

• Mothering Ourselves First 10-Day Reset: https://theschoolofmom.com/reset 
• School of Mom community: https://theschoolofmom.com/ 
• Poem by Emory Hall (referenced but not quoted in full)
• Trevor Hall concert experience

What's Coming Next

Join the 10-day reset to experience how community accountability and just 10 minutes a day of intentional self-mothering can interrupt negative patterns and create an upward spiral of wellbeing - because taking care of yourself is the most unselfish thing you can do.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

• Why gratitude requires a specific nervous system state (ventral vagal) to flow naturally
• The difference between forced gratitude and genuine appreciation that comes from regulation
• How "should" thoughts around gratitude indicate judgment and disconnection from your body
• Why struggling to feel grateful has nothing to do with your character or worthiness as a mother
• The biology behind why some emotions (including gratitude) aren't accessible on command
• Understanding gratitude as a natural byproduct of feeling safe and regulated, not a discipline to master

The Gratitude Trap

• How mothers often shame themselves for not feeling grateful despite wanting their children or having "good" lives
• Why comparing your struggles to others ("I should be grateful because my friend is divorced") blocks authentic feeling
• The judgment cycle: not feeling grateful → self-criticism → further disconnection from gratitude
• Recognizing when gratitude practices become another item on your "good mother" checklist rather than genuine connection

Alternative Pathways to Appreciation

• Using "appreciation" as a more accessible entry point when gratitude feels forced
• The "what do I have right now that I want" practice for difficult moments
• How regulation and nervous system support naturally lead to gratitude without effort
• The difference between gratitude that comes from loss/recovery versus gratitude from a regulated state

Real-Life Integration

• Seeing inability to access gratitude as an "awareness bell" that you need support, not judgment
• Moving from survival states that block gratitude to regulated states that allow it to flow
• How dedicated self-care and nervous system tending naturally increase grateful moments
• The experience of spontaneous gratitude is a sign that your inner work is creating lasting change

Nervous System Connection

• Understanding why overstressed, overstimulated states don't support grateful feelings
• The importance of "off-ramps" from dysregulation before expecting positive emotions
• How retreats and extended self-care practices strengthen your "gratitude muscle tone"
• Why forcing gratitude when dysregulated can increase shame and disconnection

Quick Reframe Practices

• When gratitude feels inaccessible, ask: "What support does my nervous system need right now?"
• Replace "I should be grateful" with "I'm human and my feelings make sense"
• Notice what you appreciate rather than forcing what you're grateful for
• Use gratitude resistance as information about your current regulation state

Quotes "If you are struggling to feel grateful and you don't feel grateful in a moment in time, there's nothing wrong with you" "Not feeling grateful has nothing to do with your character... and everything to do with what's happening in your biology right now" "When you feel resistant or when gratitude isn't accessible, that is your little awareness bell that you need some support"

Resources Mentioned

• NOURISH retreat - extended nervous system support and regulation practice: https://theschoolofmom.com/nourish 
• Movement and grounding practices as on-ramps to regulation: https://www.motheringourselvesmindfully.com/posts/flourish-dr-lydiana-garcia-self-regulation-strategies-for-moms
• Nervous system tending and mindful self-mothering work: https://www.motheringourselvesmindfully.com/posts/flourish-%F0%9F%8C%BF-tending-to-your-soil-roots-weeds-nervous-system-mother-wound-attachment and https://www.motheringourselvesmindfully.com/posts/flourish-%F0%9F%92%90-the-flourished-mother-%F0%9F%92%90 

What's Coming Next Continue exploring how to recognize your body's signals and respond with support rather than judgment, creating the conditions where positive emotions like gratitude can naturally emerge.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

• Why the end of summer leaves so many mothers feeling depleted and activated rather than refreshed
• The connection between cyclical living and seasonal transitions - how late summer mirrors the luteal phase energy
• Understanding why your body temperature and energy naturally rise during this time, creating that "ready to explode" feeling
• How lack of routine affects our nervous system and why structure actually supports our self-care practices
• The difference between anxiety-driven "productivity" and truly nourishing self-care practices
• Why 10 minutes a day of intentional practice can create profound shifts in how we mother ourselves

The Cyclical Living Connection

• How the four stages of the menstrual cycle mirror the four seasons, with late summer correlating to the luteal phase
• Why the luteal stage has two parts: the energizing "buzzy" beginning and the building heat that needs release
• Understanding this natural temperature rise in your body and energy as normal, not something to fix
• How this seasonal/cyclical awareness helps us anticipate and work with our natural rhythms rather than against them

The 10-Day Reset: Mothering Ourselves First

• What it means to prioritize 10 minutes daily for practices that truly nourish rather than just organize or accomplish
• Examples of nourishing practices: phone-free walks, yoga nidra, therapy ball rolling, meditation, gentle movement
• How community accountability makes us more likely to maintain consistent self-care practices
• The difference between "begin" and "begin again" moments - both are equally valid starting points

Integration Practices

• Identifying what truly nourishes you versus what your inner planner or anxiety wants you to do
• Creating intentional practices that connect you to joy, pleasure, ease, and rest
• Using seasonal transitions as natural reset points for establishing or returning to supportive routines
• Building structure that supports rather than restricts your self-care

Quotes "It's not make time for yourself and go organize a drawer, right? It's not letting your inner planner or your anxiety drive the bus."

"This is why I am announcing right now that we are going to do collectively in our community a 10 day reset. It's called mothering ourselves first."

Resources Mentioned

• Mothering Ourselves First 10-Day Reset: https://www.theschoolofmom.com/reset
• School of Mom community for ongoing support: https://theschoolofmom.com/
• Yoga therapy balls as a favorite nourishing tool

What's Coming Next Join the community reset starting September 14th and discover how 10 minutes a day of intentional self-mothering can transform your relationship with routine, self-care, and the natural rhythms of your body and the seasons.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

• Why the term "mental load" is actually inaccurate - it's really a "brain body load" that encompasses mental, physical, and emotional components
• The difference between cognitive/managerial tasks (which research shows have positive associations) and emotional load (which is toxic and weighs us down)
• How every simple task carries an emotional component that creates the real heaviness you feel
• Understanding that you don't have a mental load problem - you have an emotional load problem
• The visual metaphor of carrying too much physically and why your body will eventually give out
• Why planners, systems, and delegation won't solve the deeper issue if you're carrying unprocessed emotions
• How emotional load impacts everything from your capacity for joy to your desire for intimacy
• The importance of making the invisible emotional programming visible and doing the inner work

Quotes "You don't have a mental load problem. You have an emotional load problem."

"There's no such thing as just mental. Mental is emotional, is physical. There's no separation."

"What seems like a small mental, cognitive managerial task often can carry a huge emotional load."

"The more we call it the mental load, the less we actually understand it, and that means the less access we have to helping ourselves relieve this load."

Resources Mentioned

• "Why Smart, Self-Aware Moms Stay Stuck" PDF: https://theschoolofmom.com/smart 
• The School of Mom integration community: https://theschoolofmom.com/ 
• Radical Flourishing intimate program: https://cal.com/theschoolofmom/breakthrough-call 
• Nourish retreat (October 17th in Vermont): https://theschoolofmom.com/nourish 
• Upcoming podcast episode with sex therapist Rebecca Uti about "Parents and Love"

What's Coming Next Continue exploring how to do the deeper nervous system and emotional work needed to truly lighten your brain body load and access more joy, presence, and ease in your daily life.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

• The biology behind the famous "Primal Mom Scream" and why it went viral globally during COVID
• How screaming and expressing anger creates natural nervous system regulation through sympathetic charge and release
• Why the 90-second rule of emotions means we can move through anger when we don't block it
• The community aspect of anger expression - how co-regulation makes it safe to feel what we've repressed
• Understanding anger as information and guidance rather than something "bad" or unacceptable
• How blocked anger shows up in your body through illness, digestive issues, and sleep disruption
• The difference between helpful inner voices (anger) and unhelpful ones (anxiety, critic, shame)
• Why anger is an arrow pointing toward where boundaries or change are needed in your life

The Gift of Anger

• All emotions carry information, but anger specifically signals where boundaries are needed
• When you feel chronically angry about bedtime routines, morning responsibilities, or relationship dynamics - pay attention
• This unsettledness in your body is pointing to gold in terms of what you need to advocate for
• Learning to discern which inner voices to listen to versus outdated programming to release

Cyclical Living Connection

• How the luteal phase (pre-menstrual time) naturally heightens irritation and anger
• Why this isn't PMS to dismiss - it's laser clarity on what needs to change
• Using your cycle's wisdom: luteal phase for identifying what's not working, other phases for taking action
• The "irritated squirrel" phase as a signal to tune into what your anger is telling you
• For non-cycling bodies: using moon phases or seasons (summer as the equivalent building energy)

Quick Integration Practices

• When you feel angry, pause and ask: "What information do you have for me?"
• Instead of suppressing the scream, find safe ways to express it (pillow, car, nature)
• Notice patterns in what consistently triggers your anger - these are your boundary signals
• Practice seeing anger as wise guidance rather than something to fix or hide

Quotes "The body will body" - your natural impulse to scream or express anger is healthy and normal "Anger is an arrow to point towards where in your life or relationships change or boundary is needed" "We don't use our emotions, we don't tune into our body and see it as the gold and the insight and the wisdom that it is"

Resources Mentioned

• Nourish retreat - a space to process emotions in community safety: https://theschoolofmom.com/nourish 
• Radical Flourishing program for more intimate group support: https://cal.com/theschoolofmom/breakthrough-call 
• Previous episodes on nervous system understanding and inner voice work

What's Coming Next: 

Continue exploring how to work with your body's wisdom and create the changes your anger is pointing toward, rather than staying stuck in cycles of suppression and shame.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

• Why there's no "off switch" to your thoughts (and why that's actually okay)
• Understanding that your inner critic isn't YOU - it's a protective part that's been programmed by past experiences
• The difference between your inner truth and your inner protector
• How nervous system states create the lens through which we see everything in our lives
• Why that voice feels so true in the moment but is wrong 99% of the time
• The negativity bias and how our biology is wired to focus on threats and problems
• Practical steps for questioning and redirecting your inner critic
• Why affirmations don't work when your nervous system isn't aligned
• The importance of practicing new feeling states, not just new thoughts

Quotes "What if the voice inside your head is wrong? What if it's not that you need to turn it off, it's that you need to question it."

"That inner voice is not your inner truth, it's your inner protector."

"Whatever you're practicing, you're getting good at."

Practice Invitation When you notice familiar patterns of anxiety, shame, or self-doubt, pause and ask: "Who's talking right now? What part of me is this? What do they need?" This simple practice brings your mindful awareness online and shifts you into a more grounded nervous system state.

Meta-Phrase Practice Place a hand on your heart and say: "May I choose to feel and see things differently? May I practice new thoughts and new feelings that are here for my thriving?"

Resources Mentioned

• The School of Mom community and 80-90% program retention rates: https://theschoolofmom.com/waitlist 
• Upcoming Nourish retreat for deeper nervous system work: https://theschoolofmom.com/nourish 
• Free resource at Why Smart Moms Still Feel Stuck—And What Actually Helps : https://theschoolofmom.com/smart 

What's Coming Next Continue exploring how to tend to the different parts of yourself with compassion while building capacity for new ways of thinking and being that support your thriving rather than just your surviving.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

• The five core reasons why smart, self-aware moms stay stuck despite having knowledge and insight
• Why trying to "think your way out" of body-based problems keeps you in cycles of frustration
• The difference between insight and integration - and why knowledge alone doesn't create change
• How mental load overwhelm shrinks your capacity for growth and keeps your nervous system in survival mode
• The role of your inner critic in drowning out your inner wisdom and compassionate self
• Why healing and change aren't meant to be solo endeavors - the critical importance of community
• How your nervous system runs the show when it perceives threat or unfamiliarity
• Simple, accessible practices that work with your body's capacity rather than against it

What Actually Helps

• Nervous system work that meets you where you are, starting with education about how your body works
• Short, doable practices (even 1-2 minutes count) rather than overwhelming commitments
• Community support that doesn't require you to "earn" rest or prove your worth
• Understanding that your presence is your worth - not your productivity or output

Quick Integration Practices

• Place a hand on your heart and say "of course" when you notice you're triggered
• Choose one practice you already know and commit to it for 3-5 days, even imperfectly
• Eat one meal without touching your phone to practice single-tasking
• Greet your inner critic by name and thank her for trying to keep you safe
• Assess your community - are you surrounded by people doing the work or just talking about it?

Quotes

"You don't need to try harder. You don't need a new planner... You just maybe need to turn, like orient yourself to a pathway that looks a little bit different."

"Your nervous system is running the show of our lives. When there is a lack of safety in your body... your logical brain is gonna take a back seat."

"Knowing about how trauma lives in your body... is not the same as rewiring it. Just knowing about something doesn't mean it's gonna change the thing."

"Healing is not meant to be a solo endeavor... we develop these adaptations through relationship."

Resources Mentioned

• The School of Mom community: https://theschoolofmom.com/waitlist 
• "10 for 10" dedicated practice challenge: https://www.motheringourselvesmindfully.com/spaces/14670762/feed 
• Fall retreat in Vermont (October 17-19, 2025): https://theschoolofmom.com/nourish 
• Previous episode on mental load
• Free resource recap accompanying this episode

What's Coming Next

Continue exploring body-based approaches to lasting change and the importance of nervous system work in creating the life you want as a mother.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

• The three types of mental load: managerial (planning, organizing), cognitive (anticipating, decision-making), and emotional (worry, concern, tending to emotional needs)
• Why cognitive and managerial load actually have positive associations with family satisfaction and empowerment
• How emotional load creates the most negative impact and leads to exhaustion
• The trap of believing better planning will solve deeper issues around worthiness and productivity
• Understanding your capacity limits - you're not a machine that can just "upgrade" to handle more
• How childhood models and cultural messages program us to equate productivity with worth
• The nervous system's role in driving perfectionism and hyper-vigilance around doing
• Why awareness of your programming is the first step toward change
• Learning to recognize when you're operating from "should" versus authentic choice

Quotes

"There is no planner that is going to ultimately alleviate a relationship to doing and achieving that exists for so many of us."

"You can only juggle so many balls... there's only so long you can hold that stuff up."

"You are actually worthy as you are. Subtract all the doing. You are worthy as you are."

"My productivity is a badge of honor. Proves that I'm good... because my output and how much I can hold is connected to the praise that I get."

Resources Mentioned

• Kelly McGonigal's research on stress mindset: https://www.dailygood.org/story/3107/how-to-make-stress-your-friend-kelly-mcgonigal/ 
• Upcoming Nourish retreat for deeper nervous system work: https://theschoolofmom.com/nourish
• Mental Load Research study: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/37359080/ 
• Quiz: http://www.theschoolofmom.com/quiz 
• Waitlist for The School of MOM: https://theschoolofmom.com/waitlist 

What's Coming Next

Continue exploring how to break free from productivity loops and develop a healthier relationship with rest, boundaries, and your inherent worth beyond what you accomplish.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

• Understanding that 90-95% of our lives are driven by unconscious programming from nature and nurture
• Why traditional self-care (manicures, spa days, walks) often leaves us feeling more triggered than rejuvenated
• The difference between "self-care" and "selves-care" - tending to the inner parts that are actually driving our stress
• How focusing only on the "doing" of self-care misses the emotional and nervous system work that's needed
• Why you might scroll your phone during a massage or ruminate during a walk, sabotaging your own self-care
• The reality that parts of us stuck in survival mode will continue operating until they feel safe
• How to identify which inner "selves" are present during your self-care attempts
• Why asking these inner parts what they actually need (usually not a "doing" thing) is transformational work
• The importance of witnessing anxiety, reflecting worth back to shame, and working with specific body experiences
• How some bodies need rest when we're pushing them toward high-intensity movement

Quotes 

• "Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life, and you will call it fate." - Carl Jung
• "You could be on the massage table judging yourself for being on the massage table... and thus, the action that is self-care is not working for you."
• "Self-care isn't working if you're just focusing on the doing and the part of you that is online while you're doing it is rooted in some sort of stress state or survival state in your nervous system."
• "When you turn into your anxiety, like actually maybe what it needs is to be witnessed. When you turn into your shame, maybe what it needs is to have it reflected back to it, how incredible and worthy it is."

Resources Mentioned

• The Radical Mom Pause Toolkit: http://www.theschoolofmom.com/pause 
• The School of Mom community (currently on waitlist enrollment): https://theschoolofmom.com/waitlist 
• In-person retreat opportunities (check bio for summer 2025): https://theschoolofmom.com/nourish 

What's Coming Next 

Continue exploring the deeper transformational work of rewiring our unconscious programming and learning to meet ourselves with radical compassion and acceptance in the pause.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

• Understanding the difference between vulva (external) and vagina (internal) - and why this distinction matters
• How using incorrect anatomical terms can impact child safety and abuse prevention
• The shocking reality that many women don't learn proper anatomy until adulthood
• Why the medical field has historically overlooked pelvic health education
• How shame around female anatomy affects everything from periods to sexual health
• The importance of teaching children accurate body part names from an early age
• Navigating pushback when advocating for proper anatomical education
• Breaking generational cycles of shame and misinformation about women's bodies
• Understanding that the clitoris exists solely for pleasure - making joy our birthright
• Practical tips for age-appropriate conversations with young children

Quotes

"The vulva is what you can see on the outside... when we're like, no one can touch your vagina at school, essentially what we’re saying is, the girls can’t be fingered at school.”

"When kids know what their anatomical parts are called, then they can accurately describe what we hope never happens to them."

"We have one part of our body that has one sole purpose, and that is pleasure... pleasure is our birthright."

"It's just like your elbow. It's just a part that society has deemed to have a lot more meaning behind it."

Resources Mentioned

• Information about lichen sclerosus resources, LS Support Network Homepage: https://lssupportnetwork.org/ 
• Bodies are Cool book: Amazon.com: https://www.amazon.com/Bodies-Are-Cool-Tyler-Feder/dp/0593112628 
• Pussy: A Reclamation: Amazon.com: https://www.amazon.com/Pussy-Reclamation-Regena-Thomashauer/dp/1401950248 
• Come as You Are:  Amazon.com: https://www.amazon.com/Come-You-Are-Surprising-Transform/dp/1982165316 
• Dr. Alexandra Digrado's Practice Boston Pelvic Physical Therapy: https://www.amazon.com/Come-You-Are-Surprising-Transform/dp/1982165316

What's Coming Next

Continue the conversation about empowering our daughters with body knowledge and breaking cycles of shame around female anatomy and sexuality.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

Key Points

• Understanding that you are worthy just as you are - your presence is your worth
• Recognizing that anxiety, shame, and triggered reactions are not character flaws but programming
• How 90-95% of our existence is driven by unconscious programming living in our nervous system
• The difference between fault (not yours) and responsibility (yours to rewire)
• Why pausing feels "unsexy" but is everything when it comes to creating change
• How we cannot change what we're not aware of - awareness must come first
• The challenge of swimming upstream from a society that celebrates visible doing over conscious being
• Why community support is essential for sustaining this radical practice
• How longer dedicated practice (like retreats) provides deeper rewiring opportunities

Quotes "You are not your fault. You are not the problem. It is your programming that is the problem."

"Your programming runs so deep in your nervous system, in your lineage, in the conditioning of our society and our culture."

"We cannot change what we're not aware of."

"It's so unsexy to talk about pausing. Our nervous systems are like, hell no. I don't wanna go into a moment of stillness."

"Every single mom Pause you take is radical. 30 seconds radical, so important."

Resources Mentioned

• The Radical Mom Pause Toolkit: Available at https://theschoolofmom.com/pause 
• Live call on Thursday, July 10th at 12:00 PM Eastern Standard Time: https://www.motheringourselvesmindfully.com/events/monthly-musings-71190188 
• Upcoming Nourish Retreat (Friday night to Sunday format): https://checkout.theschoolofmom.com/nourish-retreat 

What's Coming Next Continue exploring the Radical Mom Pause practice and discover more tools for rewiring unconscious programming and creating conscious, intentional mothering patterns.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

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Key Topics Covered

Understanding Neural Pathways

• How repeated patterns create well-traveled mental "trails"
• Why changing established programming feels challenging
• The difference between surviving and thriving patterns

The Power of the Pause

• Moving from unconscious reactions to conscious responses
• Activating your prefrontal cortex and executive functioning
• Creating space between stimulus and response

The Rewiring Process

• Catching yourself in reactive patterns
• Tuning into your nervous system states
• Meeting your inner needs with compassion
• Finding your personal "oil and garlic" regulation tools

Beyond In-the-Moment Changes

• Why focusing only on thoughts is like blocking a fire hose
• The importance of addressing nervous system programming
• How 90-95% of our experience stems from unconscious patterns

Meet the Flourished Mother

• Embodying the ventral vagal safety state
• Learning healthy dysregulation and recovery
• Moving from camping out in stress to returning to safety

The Time Factor

• How different nervous system states affect our relationship with time
• Thoughts from stress vs. grounded states
• Reframing time scarcity into time abundance

Key Insights

"We can't change anything we're not aware of. Pausing is like pulling off onto the scenic outlook and looking at the road that you're on."

"The space between stimulus and response is where your freedom and your choice lives."

"Making time for myself models a new way of being for my kids."

Practical Takeaways

• Use the pause to step out of autopilot reactions
• Focus on nervous system regulation rather than just changing thoughts
• Practice accessing safety states proactively, not just reactively
• Consider longer pauses for deeper transformation work

Resources Mentioned

• Awakening the Flourished Mother Meditation: https://player.captivate.fm/episode/aea1663a-d5e5-4725-b907-3b849696eff8/ 
• Nourish Retreat: https://checkout.theschoolofmom.com/nourish-retreat/ 
• Radical Flourishing program: https://cal.com/theschoolofmom/breakthrough-call 

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

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Key Topics Covered:

• Why meeting your needs is a practice, not perfection
• Understanding your nervous system states (safety, stress, and shutdown)
• The three camps: grounded safety state, sympathetic (stress) state, and dorsal (shutdown) state
• How to identify which state you're in and what your body is telling you
• Practical tools for meeting yourself where you're at
• The importance of moving through states rather than jumping directly to calm

Tools & Resources Mentioned:

• The Radical MOM Pause Toolkit: https://theschoolofmom.com/pause
• School of Mom Quiz: Discovering Your Dominant Inner Voice: http://www.theschoolofmom.com/quiz 
• Marc Brackett's Mood Meter: https://marcbrackett.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Mood_Meter_Marc_Brackett_Permission-to-Feel.pdf 
• Yoga tune-up balls
• The "oil and garlic" concept for go-to regulation practices

Key Takeaway: You need to meet your inner self where it's at first, matching the energy of your current state before gently guiding yourself toward regulation. This might mean movement and dancing for anxious energy, or gentle movement to lift yourself out of shutdown.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

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Key Points

• The radical nature of consciousness in an unconscious world - why pausing and bringing awareness is inherently transformative
• Understanding the MOM framework: Meeting yourself in the moment, Observing what's present, and Mothering your needs
• How movement serves as a bridge from unconscious to conscious awareness
• The practice of meeting your full experience - both internal and external - with curiosity rather than judgment
• Observing with acceptance, kindness, and discernment while watching for unhelpful patterns and stories
• Recognizing different "selves" or parts (like anxiety) and learning to meet them with compassion
• How the act of witnessing yourself IS mothering - fulfilling the human need to be seen and accepted
• Tuning into basic needs that aren't really basic for mothers: hunger, thirst, rest, movement, bathroom breaks
• Learning the unique language of your body through practice and curiosity
• How this practice creates lineage healing and cycle-breaking in real time

Quotes

"Simply being here is in and of itself radical. You are becoming conscious in a world and a existence that is on the whole very unconscious and subconscious."

"So many of us are living on autopilot. We are being very mindless moving through our days and our lives, and our mothering and our relationships."

"Movement is a wonderful bridge from our unconscious to the conscious."

"Just like our kids, our bodies, our humanness is desperate for attention. Not just desperate for attention, it's desperate for kind and curious presence."

"We cannot change what we are not aware of and to become aware of something we have to pause and notice and practice mothering ourselves."

"This is lineage cycle breaking and creating in real time."

Resources Mentioned

• The Radical MOM Pause guided practice: https://theschoolofmom.com/pause
• Upcoming class in The Radical Mom Pause Toolkit series focusing on nervous system tools: https://theschoolofmom.com/pause
• The School of MOM Quiz: www.theschoolofmom.com/quiz 
• Marc Brackett's Mood Meter: https://marcbrackett.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Mood_Meter_Marc_Brackett_Permission-to-Feel.pdf

What's Coming Next

The next episode in this Radical Mom Pause toolkit series will explore tools for meeting yourself in the moment and tending to your nervous system, building on this foundational practice of conscious awareness and self-mothering.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

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Key Points

• Understanding mindfulness as present moment awareness with curiosity, discernment, acceptance, and compassion
• Why slowing down or being still is essential for true mindfulness - you can't see clearly while moving through life on autopilot
• The shocking reality that 90-95% of our experience is driven by subconscious programming that often doesn't serve us
• How our nervous system carries outdated conditioning from lineage, society, and culture that we wouldn't consciously choose today
• The MOM ritual: Meeting yourself in the moment, Observing what's present, and Mothering your needs
• Why pausing feels like redirecting a Mac truck going 85mph - and why that makes it radical
• How accessing your prefrontal cortex through pausing gives you response flexibility instead of unconscious reactions
• The revolutionary act of swimming upstream against a world driven by anxiety, fear, scarcity, and dysregulation

Quotes

"Mindfulness is present moment awareness with curiosity, discernment, acceptance, and kindness and compassion."

"90 to 95% of our existence in this world is in our rooted deep programming... So many of us have programming that is really not serving us."

"There's a space between stimulus and response, and in that space is where your freedom lies. That is the pause."

"We cannot change what we are not aware of. We have to bring attention first to the thing."

"It doesn't matter how many books you read and podcasts you listen to, if you are still moving through the motions unconsciously and mindlessly going through your life, nothing is going to change."

Resources Mentioned

• The Radical Mom Pause Toolkit - available at https://theschoolofmom.com/pause Upcoming live call for toolkit participants (July 10th at 12 pm EDT 2025)

What's Coming Next

This episode kicks off a special miniseries covering:

1. The guided Radical Mom Pause practice
2. Meeting your needs in the pause
3. Rewiring your programming for lasting change

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

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Key Points

• Why we can't be in the business of comparing suffering and how all emotional experiences are valid
• The profound connection between personal loss and recommitment to self-awareness work
• How hosting a retreat while grieving revealed the perfect timing of life's challenges
• Redefining flourishing: being weepy and riding emotional waves with grace IS flourishing
• The concept of becoming "unicorns" - radically different, grounded, compassionate women The power of beginner's mind and how we receive teachings differently as we evolve
• Why repetition is essential for rewiring our programming and laying down new neural pathways
• Breaking free from scarcity-based decision making to live from abundance and hope

Quotes "We can't be in the business of comparing suffering. Your heart is valid and your heart is hard 'cause it is."

"There's nothing more important than attending to ourselves and becoming more self-aware and learning how to heal our nervous systems."

"Being weepy is flourishing for me. Riding these waves of my experience with more ease and grace... Flourishing is riding the full spectrum of my human experience with more grace and ease and rest and pleasure and love."

"We are becoming the unicorns... we are becoming the grounded, compassionate, loving their body, women and models that don't really exist around us."

Resources Mentioned

• Radical Flourishing program: https://cal.com/theschoolofmom/breakthrough-call
• Upcoming Nourish retreat at Sky Meadow retreat center in Vermont (limited spaces available): https://checkout.theschoolofmom.com/nourish-retreat/
• The School of Mom community and programs: https://theschoolofmom.com/

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

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What You'll Hear:

• Why I chose to go for a walk and record this episode when I "should" have been tackling my massive to-do list
• The reality that no one is coming to save us from our overscheduled lives
• How to break free from the trap of waiting for the "right time" to prioritize yourself
• The powerful shift that happens when we interrupt overwhelming patterns with simple self-care
• Why making time for yourself when you're busiest is actually the most productive thing you can do

Key Moments:

🚶‍♀️ Recording in real-time while experiencing the "buzziness" of an overwhelming week (2:30)

⏰ The meditation principle: "Meditate for 15 minutes a day, unless you're super busy - then meditate for an hour" (18:45)

💪 Why three simple arm circles can create profound shifts in your nervous system (20:15)

🔄 Breaking the cycle of "I'll take care of myself when..." thinking (14:20)

Quotes:

"When I am the busiest is when I need to prioritize making time for myself the most."

"The work is making time for yourself when you have no time for yourself - it's not waiting for you to have more time."

Resources:

• Information about one-on-one coaching: Send a message asking about coaching. https://cal.com/theschoolofmom/15-min-flourish-chat
• Follow along for more real-time support and community

If this message about prioritizing yourself during your busiest seasons resonated with you, please share this episode with another mom who needs this reminder.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

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What You'll Hear:

• The journey that led to our rebrand and why I felt the previous logo didn't reflect the depth and soul of The School of Mom
• A candid look at a difficult designer relationship that pushed me to trust my intuition
• How meditation and surrendering to the process revealed the perfect symbol for our brand
• The remarkable symbolism of the Maple seed and why it perfectly represents The School of Mom community
• An exciting announcement about FLOURISH enrollment closing and a new book project

Key Moments:

• 🍁 The meditation that revealed the Maple seed imagery (8:45)
• 🌱 Discovering the powerful symbolism of Maple seeds that perfectly aligns with our values (12:20)
• 🌿 How this experience taught me to trust what the brand "wants to be" rather than forcing a direction (17:35)
• 📚 Announcement about closing FLOURISH enrollment to new members and beginning work on a book (22:10)

Quotes:

"I am surrendering to what The School of MOM is meant to be and how it wants to show up in the world."

"The more I learn how to trust the language of my body, the more I realize that the best solution comes when we feel (not think) our way into things."

Resources:

• Join FLOURISH before enrollment closes: https://theschoolofmom.com/flourish
• Sign up for our newsletter: https://theschoolofmom.com/newsletter
• Follow on Instagram for updates: https://www.instagram.com/the.schoolofmom/

If the story of trusting your intuition in business resonated with you, please share this episode with someone who might need to hear it.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

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Episode Highlights:

• The Garden Metaphor: How placing our personal "garden" in a community of like-minded mothers creates the foundation for growth
• Becoming a Mindful Gardener: The practice of observing ourselves with curiosity, discernment, acceptance, and kindness
• Tending to Your Soil: Why examining your nervous system patterns (like people-pleasing or perfectionism) is essential before planting new habits
• The Plant-Nourish-Flourish Cycle: Why we often struggle with the crucial nourishment step between intention and results
• Growth Takes Time: Understanding that personal transformation follows natural cycles and requires patience, just like gardening
• Community as the Key to Flourishing: Why true flourishing happens in connection with others who support your journey

Important Announcements:

• Flourish Community is closing its doors to new members at the end of May 2025 for the foreseeable future. Register here: https://theschoolofmom.com/flourish
• Now is the perfect time to join before the community shifts to a more intimate space for the summer
• Exciting news about an upcoming book project

Share Your Garden Metaphors!

Whether you're keeping a basil plant alive on your kitchen counter or maintaining a full garden, I'd love to hear your nature metaphors and gardening experiences!

Join us in the Plant, Nourish, Flourish journey - where we learn to tend to ourselves with the same care and patience we give to our gardens.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

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• In this episode, I pose a confronting question: "Who in your life sees, loves, and witnesses you unconditionally just as you are?"
• When asked in my community, answers varied (children, aunts, sisters, a couple partners) - but notably, no one mentioned their mothers
• I share my personal answer to this question and how it’s lead to a liberational path forward
• Understanding that we often unconsciously seek in our partners what we didn't receive from our primary caregivers
• When we become our own source of unconditional love, it transforms all our relationships

Quotes from the Episode:

"When we can stop expecting someone else to be this presence for us and we turn towards ourselves to become this witness and this unconditional love... we can release the burden that we put on others unconsciously."

"It takes one person in a relationship to change the dance."

"Your love for yourself gets to be the bigger energy."

Announcements:

• Enrollment for Flourish and Write will be closing at the end of the month
• I'll be working with my community on writing a book together

Let's Connect:

I'd love to hear how this episode resonates with you! How did you answer the question? Who in your life sees, loves, and witnesses you unconditionally? Share your thoughts with me.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

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Key Points

• The School of MOM celebrates its 5-year anniversary, having launched on Mother's Day 2020
• Reflections on a recent powerful women's event called "Remember" and the insights gained about identity, ancestry, and motherhood
• The importance of "mothering ourselves mindfully" and how this work manifests in real life
• Redefining what flourishing looks like in different seasons of motherhood
• How to navigate Mother's Day when you have a complicated or non-existent relationship with your own mother
• The growth of The School of MOM community and programs over five years

Quotes

"I can see the work working... I am so much more myself, unapologetically, meaning all my feelings are gifts. All the waves of emotions that I have are welcome."

"I am absolutely unsubscribing to the narrative that it is not available to mothers to thrive."

"If you, on this Mother's Day, are feeling heaviness, grief, anger, resentment, this is your invitation to see that as the medicine, to see it as a wave."

Resources Mentioned

• Flourish - 12-month integration program
• Untethered - Program for women with strained maternal relationships
• Special cohort for therapist moms (currently has a waitlist)

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

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This week leading up to Mother's Day, I want to acknowledge that everyone listening will have a different subconscious response in their body to these celebrations. Some might feel open and expansive, while others might feel contracted and heavy. Both experiences are completely valid.

For those with strained or non-existent relationships with their mothers (what we call "apples" in our community), please know you're not alone. I've included a special meditation in the resources below to support you during this time.

On this Mother's Day, I'm celebrating all of you—your full range of emotions, your journey, and everything that has shaped you as a mother. May you know you are deeply loved, worthy of your desires, and the perfect mother for your children.

RESOURCES:

• A special meditation for those with strained or non-existent relationships with their mothers: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1vIdsrnMgDq4Ifvkp1zkJx24EpVnTgMfd/view?usp=sharing
• Book a 1:1 with Sarah at a special price through May 18th: https://cal.com/theschoolofmom/1-1-with-sarah-flash-sale
• Book a 3-pack of coaching sessions with Sarah at a special price through May 18th: https://checkout.theschoolofmom.com/3-session-pack/ [Use code MOTHERSDAY]

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

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What You'll Learn:

• Why our nervous systems aren't designed for the constant barrage of news and information we face today
• How setting boundaries around "inputs" (what we see, hear, and consume) is crucial for wellbeing
• Understanding the Four Noble Truths, which teaches that suffering is inevitable, but our reaction to it is optional
• How our nervous system state dictates the lens through which we see the world
• The importance of returning to basics: movement, sleep, nourishing food, and contemplative practice
• Why asking "What would love do?" can be a powerful guiding question

Key Reminders:

• Be meticulous about boundaries with inputs - what comes in through your eyes, ears, and mouth
• The state of your nervous system affects how you interpret everything around you
• When in a dysregulated state, your body starts shutting down vital systems
• Self-love isn't fluffy - it's foundational to being able to give love to others
• If you're listening to this podcast, you're a pattern interrupter and a lightworker

Mentioned In This Episode:

• Nervous System 101 episode
• Conversation with Shinichi Daimyo about boundaries and values. Listen here: Spotify or Apple podcast

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!

www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call