Healing Anxious Attachment

Why Men Don't Commit to Anxious Women

Mon, 13 Apr 2026 07:00:00 -0400

We're diving into the dynamic between anxious women and non-committal men, and how over-availability and trying to hold everything together can unintentionally create the very outcome you don’t want.

We also touch on why anxious tendencies attract avoidant partners, and what truly creates the space for a man to step forward, invest, and choose you.

See in you in there!

GO DEEPER

Join me inside Becoming Secure - a 3 Phase Method for changing your attachment from anxious to secure at the nervous system level 🧡

Mentioned in this episode:

❤️‍🔥 No More Situationships !! ❤️‍🔥 Sign up 👉🏼 https://link.becomingsecurecommunity.com/no-more-situationships-workshop-pd A free live class where we'll dive into .: Why high-functioning women keep attracting unavailable men and the single thing driving it that no one talks about. .: How to stop making it easy for men who aren't choosing you and what to do instead that actually creates real attraction. .: Secure vs. Scarcity -The difference between emotional security and emotional settling and how to tell which one you're living in. .: What it actually means to be magnetic (plot twist, it's not "black cat energy"). Grounded, embodied, and rested in yourself. .: A somatic practice you can use immediately to shift out of anything that resembles anxious attachment and back into your center. SEE YOU THERE! Sign up 👉🏼 https://link.becomingsecurecommunity.com/no-more-situationships-workshop-pd

Why You Should Spend Time Away From Your Partner

Mon, 30 Mar 2026 07:45:00 -0400

In a world that often glorifies constant closeness, this episode explores the power of space within relationships.

We dive into the concept of polarity - how attraction thrives when there’s a sense of individuality and magnetism between two people. Because when you’re always merged, something can start to fade.

We also touch on why space can feel especially important for avoidant partners and why many men, in particular, value freedom as a way to feel safe and open.

See in you in there!

Say Hi on Instagram - I love hearing from you @johhhannamaria

GO DEEPER

Join me inside Becoming Secure - a 3 Phase Method for changing your attachment from anxious to secure at the nervous system level 🧡

Mentioned in this episode:

Cycle Syncing for the Anxious Nervous System

Sun, 15 Mar 2026 21:00:00 -0400

One week you feel empowered, hot, regulated, grounded, making progress. The next you're spiralling, your inner critic is screaming, and you're convinced you've undone everything you've worked for. It's not a a setback - it's your internal winter.

In this episode, we cover the four seasons of your cycle and how to eat, move, and schedule your life accordingly.

Plus the specific codes that helped me personally reduce luteal phase irritability.

You'll learn what cycle syncing looks like if you're on birth control, and an intro to seed cycling as an easy hormonal support tool.

See in you in there!

Say Hi on Instagram - I love hearing from you @johhhannamaria

GO DEEPER

Join me inside Becoming Secure - a 3 Phase Method for changing your attachment from anxious to secure at the nervous system level 🧡

Mentioned in this episode:

What Disordered Eating & Anxious Attachment Have In Common

Wed, 25 Feb 2026 06:30:00 -0400

What if your relationship with food isn’t just about food?

In this episode, I share my own struggles with disordered eating and anxious attachment, and the surprising parallels I’ve noticed between the two. From craving reassurance in relationships to seeking comfort or control through food, these patterns often stem from the same place - fear of abandonment, lack of safety, and a deep need for control.

This is a conversation about the emotional roots beneath these behaviours and what healing has looked like for me as I’ve started building more security within myself.

PS. On March 5th I'm hosting "The Language of the Body Workshop" which is a perfect intro to somatic therapy and will give you frameworks for understanding what it means to rewrite patterns on a subconscious level and free you of old stories, blocks, and even symptoms.

Join the Becoming Secure women's membership to learn how to use somatic practices and inner work to heal anxious attachment 🧡

Over 30 guided somatic practices
2 live calls a month
Next workshop March 5th! (Replay available)
Individualized coaching from Johanna

learn more here 💐

Mentioned in this episode:

ChatGPT Interviews Me! (and didn't hold back)

Tue, 10 Feb 2026 07:00:00 -0400

I asked chatgpt to play interviewer and focus on what would bring you the most value. Some of the questions we covered are:

"What's one moment in your healing anxious attachment journey that really changed the game for you?"

"When we hear that the other person isn't ready to deepen a relationship what's one practice we can do to deepen our self trust in those moments?"

"What's one daily ritual or mindset shift you'd recommend that can help women stay on track, especially on the tough days?"

"Many women feel their still repeating the same pattern of situationships, if you were sitting across from them right now, what's one first step you'd have them take, to break that cycle for good?"

"What's one gentle piece of guidance you'd offer, to help women step into that new chapter?"

"What's one word you'd love for your listeners to hold on to, as they step into their journey?"

Join the Becoming Secure women's membership to learn how to use somatic practices and inner work to heal anxious attachment 🧡

Over 30 guided somatic practices
2 live calls a month
Individualized from Johanna

learn more here 💐

Mentioned in this episode:

Why Effort, Patience, and People Pleasing Stops Working

Wed, 07 Jan 2026 03:00:00 -0400

In this episode, we explore what it means to move from forced to self-sourced. When external crutches like validation, and good-girl syndrome aren't enough and you’re called to become your own anchor.

This conversation unpacks the emotional shifts, inner resilience, and self-trust that are built when you stop outsourcing safety, validation, and direction.

If you’ve found yourself gripping and forcing to hold yourself through uncertainty, this episode is an invitation to step into deep self-reliance, inner security, and embodied confidence.

👑 ✨ SELF-SOURCED 8 Week Group Program Waitlisted 👑 ✨ Learn more.

An 8 week initiation into your own power, through and beyond healing anxious attachment into regulation, inner security, and amazing relationships.

https://link.becomingsecurecommunity.com/ss-ep45-btm

Mentioned in this episode:

Anxious to Secure in 1 Year

Fri, 26 Dec 2025 15:00:00 -0400

In this episode, we dive into what it truly takes to become secure within one year.

This conversation breaks down the key shifts, practices, and mindset changes required to transform your inner world.

If you're ready to step into a version of yourself that feels calm, confident, and worthy of love, this episode is your roadmap to getting there. 🌟

Join Becoming Secure

Learn more here: https://link.becomingsecurecommunity.com/-ep44

🧡

Mentioned in this episode:

How to Survive the Holidays - Boundaried, Grounded and Restored

Tue, 02 Dec 2025 11:45:00 -0400

The holidays can be triggering, here's how to protect your peace.

This episode covers:

-How you can bring more depth and feeling into your traditions

-5 ways to clear and protect your energy

-Discerning when to have the intense conversations

Go Deeper into you Inner Work Journey:

Join the Becoming Secure women’s membership to learn how to use somatic practices and inner work to heal anxious attachment 🧡

30+ guided somatic practices
2 live calls a month
Individualized coaching from Johanna

learn more here 💐

Mentioned in this episode:

Finally Dating a Good Guy but Feeling Anxious

Wed, 12 Nov 2025 08:00:00 -0400

In this episode, we explore what happens when you finally meet a good, emotionally available man, but your anxious attachment starts to panic.

We talk about why healthy love can feel unsafe when you’re used to chaos, inconsistency, or having to prove your worth in relationships. You’ll learn how to recognize when your nervous system is reacting to safety as unfamiliar, and how to start soothing that part of you that expects love to be hard.

This conversation also touches on the difference between genuine connection and emotional intensity, and how to stay grounded when you want to run, overthink, or self-sabotage.

Enjoy this episode 🙏🏼.

Go Deeper into you Inner Work Journey

Join the Becoming Secure women’s membership to learn how to use somatic practices and inner work to heal anxious attachment 🧡

30+ guided somatic practices
2 live calls a month
Individualized coaching from Johanna

learn more here 💐

Mentioned in this episode:

Breaking the Toxic Pattern of Productivity as Self Worth

Thu, 23 Oct 2025 07:00:00 -0400

In this episode, we dive into the toxic cycle of tying our value to how much we achieve or produce and why it pushes away healthy love.

We talk about what happens when our reality revolves around being busy, rather than being fulfilled. And how women suffer when pleasure, joy, and creativity fall to the bottom of the list.

This conversation also explores how perfectionism and the need for control can pull us further from ourselves.

Enjoy!

Go Deeper:

Join the Becoming Secure women's membership to learn how to use somatic practices and inner work to heal anxious attachment 🧡

Over 30 guided somatic practices
2 live calls a month
Individualized coaching from Johanna

learn more here 💐

Mentioned in this episode:

Having Secure Standards: The End of ‘Almost Right’ Love

Mon, 13 Oct 2025 07:15:00 -0400

If you’ve ever held out for someone’s potential because you could feel how good they are deep down… this episode is for you.

We’ll talk about:

Why emotionally unavailable men can still feel magnetic
How to stop mistaking intensity for love
Moving from shrinking into high standards for love
What it really means to feel safe being chosen

Join the Becoming Secure women's membership to learn how to use somatic practices and inner work to heal anxious attachment 🧡

Over 30 guided somatic practices
2 live calls a month
Individualized coaching from Johanna

learn more here 💐

Mentioned in this episode:

Releasing Anxiety from the Body

Thu, 25 Sep 2025 12:30:00 -0400

Release anxious energy on every level, from shifting your perspective to completing the stress cycle, holding discomfort, and using somatic practices to create real relief.

I explore how to release anxiety on every level: the mental layer (shifting perspectives and letting go of rigid expectations), the physical layer (rest, hormones, and completing the stress cycle), the emotional layer (building the capacity to hold discomfort), and the subconscious layer (somatic practices and parts work).

DO THE INNER WORK

Join the Becoming Secure women's membership to learn how to use somatic practices and inner work to heal anxious attachment 🧡

Over 30 guided somatic practices
2 live calls a month
Individualized from Johanna

learn more here 💐

Mentioned in this episode:

Psychology of the Inner Critic: Releasing Negative Beliefs

Thu, 28 Aug 2025 08:00:00 -0400

The inner critic and negative self-talk often feels like our own voice, but many of its harsh words aren’t truly yours. In this episode, I unpack how limiting beliefs get handed down through parents, teachers, and society, and how even one painful comment can loop in the mind as self-criticism. You’ll also learn how projections shape the way you see yourself and others, and I’ll guide you through a simple questioning process to dismantle unhelpful beliefs so you can move toward a kinder inner dialogue.

In this episode, you’ll:

Discover how the inner critic is formed and why it speaks so harshly.
Learn how projections influence your beliefs about yourself.
Explore a practical questioning process to dissolve negative self-talk.

Go Deeper:

Join me in the Becoming Secure women's membership. Tools, teachings, and practices to do the inner work, and Heal Anxious Attachment 🧡

Mentioned in this episode:

Trauma Explained: How Your Mind and Body Hold (and Heal) the Past

Thu, 21 Aug 2025 08:00:00 -0400

Trauma isn’t only about life-threatening events, it’s also the smaller wounds and unmet needs that shape how we think, feel, and protect ourselves.

In this episode, we explore the layers of the mind (conscious, subconscious, unconscious), the difference between Big T and Little T trauma, and the trauma response or defense systems that develop as a result.

You’ll learn how the body holds these memories and why healing through somatic work can feel surprisingly safe and natural.

Go deeper inside Becoming Secure. A high-touch Women's Group with live workshops and Q&A calls, somatic healing videos, accountability for your personal growth, and a place where you'll immediately remember that you're not the only one going through this 🧡

Join the Becoming Secure membership here. 7 Day Free Trial. Monthly subscription and cancel easily, anytime.

Mentioned in this episode:

Inside Your Nervous System: Survival Modes & How to Feel Less Anxious

Mon, 11 Aug 2025 16:00:00 -0400

Your body has a default survival pattern like fight, flight, freeze, and fawn which shape how you respond to stress, emotions and triggers. In this episode, you’ll learn how to recognize these patterns, understand your “window of tolerance,” and work with your nervous system to feel calmer and more in control.

By the end you'll

Understand the four core survival responses and how they can show up in subtle, everyday behaviors.
Learn what the “window of tolerance” is and why it’s essential for emotional and nervous system health.
Discover practical tools to move from anxiety back into calm.

Resources Mentioned:

Join my Becoming Secure women's group for 30 Days of Somatic Practices, and monthly live workshops and coaching calls.

Connect with me on Instagram, I love receiving your messages 💖

Mentioned in this episode:

Discovering Your Core Needs (+Somatic Practice)

Wed, 02 Jul 2025 09:00:00 -0400

One of the most powerful things you can do on your healing journey is get good at knowing and trusting what you need — not what you were told to need, not what you think you should need, but what your body and heart are truly craving.

This episode answers a question from a Becoming Secure Community Member who asked: “How do I even know what my core needs are? And once I do… how can I meet them on my own?”

Together, we explore:

Neediness versus Needs
When to meet your own needs and when to ask for your needs to be met
Discovering your deeper emotional or relational needs
How to reconnect to your needs through your body
Core needs in the realms of intimacy, sex, safety, self-expression, and relationships
The connection between your needs and your values

This episode also includes a somatic practice to help you tune in and feel your needs rather than just think about them. You’ll walk away with clarity, direction, and a deeper sense of connection to your inner world.

Resources Mentioned:

Quiz - Which Anxious Attachment Type Are You?

Becoming Secure Community - Course + Community + Coaching

Mentioned in this episode:

Why You Struggle to Receive (Even Though You Want Love)

Thu, 26 Jun 2025 09:00:00 -0400

In this episode, I’m talking about why receiving often feels uncomfortable — especially for women with anxious attachment — and how this survival pattern shows up in your body and your relationships.

We’ll explore:

Why high-functioning women resist support
The somatic signs you’re in survival mode
How childhood patterns shaped your ability to receive
What it really takes to let love land

And if you’re ready to shift this not just in your mind, but in your body — join me for my upcoming live workshop: Held – Letting Love In. In the Becoming Secure Membership.

In the workshop we go deep into the somatic healing needed to turn off survival mode and turn on your capacity to receive.

Mentioned in this episode:

How High-Functioning Anxiety Blocks Love — and What to Do Instead

Mon, 09 Jun 2025 07:00:00 -0400

You never “need” anything. But underneath, you’re anxious, and wishing to feel more held.

In this episode, we explore what happens when high-functioning anxiety plays out in relationships — from early dating to long-term partnership.

And most importantly, how it impacts your ability to be met, supported, and chosen.

You’ll hear:

Why overfunctioning can push love away — even when your intentions are pure
How emotional management erodes polarity and leads to mothering
The kinds of men we attract when we’re performing vs. when we’re rooted in self
And what to practice instead — so you stop chasing safety and start receiving love

If you’ve ever said “I did everything and he still pulled away, why wasn't I enough?” this episode is for you.

WORK TOGETHER 🧡

🌻 🫳🏼 BECOMING SECURE MEMBERSHIP COMMUNITY - Course + Coaching + Community

📲 Find me on Instagram

Mentioned in this episode:

She’s Calm, Collected… and Anxious AF: High-Functioning Anxiety

Tue, 20 May 2025 09:00:00 -0400

You look like the woman who has it all together — grounded, reliable, composed.

But underneath? You’re feeling urgent, worried, and overthinking. Managing everything. And maybe quietly unraveling.

This episode is for the high-achieving, high-functioning woman who knows something feels off but can't break through on it.

We’re talking about the kind of anxiety that hides behind performing calm.

Inside, we’ll explore:

What high-functioning anxiety really is — and how it hides in plain sight
How emotional repression becomes self-abandonment
The signs your body is waving the white flag (even if your mind won’t admit it)
What your nervous system is actually craving
Why healing requires more than just self-awareness

If you’ve been doing all the “right” things but still feel disconnected from yourself… this one will land.

Resources Mentioned:

🔗 Join the Becoming Secure Membership for access to 30+ guided somatic practices, monthly coaching calls, and high touch support from me.

📲 Message me on Instagram

❓ Take the Which Type of Anxious Attachment Are You? quiz

Mentioned in this episode:

Anx. Attch. in Friendships: People-Pleasing, and the Fear of Being Replaced

Fri, 09 May 2025 07:45:00 -0400

We talk so much about how anxious attachment plays out in romance—but what about friendship?

If you’ve ever felt too sensitive, too intense, or too dependent in friendships—or you’ve abandoned them for romance—this conversation is for you.

In this episode, I explore the subtle (and not-so-subtle) ways anxious attachment shows up in our platonic connections: overthinking texts, people-pleasing, jealousy, and the pain of feeling replaceable. We also look at deeper patterns—like recreating dynamics with your mother or sister, using male friendships as emotional placeholders, and disappearing from your friends when a new love interest enters the picture.

Go beyond understanding your patterns and actually start healing them at the root, come join us inside my membership, Becoming Secure. You’ll get nervous system-based tools, somatic practices, and community support to help you feel safe, grounded, and secure in love and life.

⏱️ Timestamps

Note: These are approximate and meant to help listeners follow the flow.

00:00 – Intro & why this topic matters

02:15 – What anxious attachment in friendship actually looks like

05:50 – How to tell if you're over-functioning or emotionally over-relying on a friend

09:30 – The mother/sister dynamic in female friendships

13:20 – Male friendships as placeholders for father wounds

16:45 – The quiet pattern of abandoning your friends for romance

20:30 – Self-reflection and starting to shift these patterns

23:00 – Invitation to go deeper inside Becoming Secure

Mentioned in this episode:

Healing the Guilt That Keeps You Small

Mon, 14 Apr 2025 14:00:00 -0400

If you’ve ever felt guilty for having needs, setting boundaries, or taking up space—this episode is for you.

We’re unpacking the kind of guilt that doesn’t come from doing something wrong, but from trying to stay safe.

For those of us with anxious attachment, guilt can feel like a constant hum in the background—shaping our choices, silencing our truth, and keeping us small.

In this episode, I’m diving into:

The difference between true guilt, false guilt, and shame
How guilt shows up in anxious attachment
How to heal unhelpful guilt responses on a nervous system level
What it really looks like to forgive yourself and move forward

Also mentioned:

The Becoming Secure Membership

Hang on Instagram:

@johhhannamaria

Mentioned in this episode:

How to Find Yourself Again After a Breakup

Mon, 17 Mar 2025 09:00:00 -0400

After a breakup, it’s easy to feel lost—like you don’t even recognize yourself anymore. In this episode, we’re diving into how to reconnect with you after a relationship ends.

We’ll explore what that relationship revealed about you, where you may have lost yourself, and the moments that felt out of alignment. I’ll guide you through ways to help you reclaim your identity and step back into your truth.

Connect with me on Instagram @johhhannamaria. Please send me a DM letting me know that you're coming from the podcast! 🧡

Mentioned in this episode:

Moving Through a Breakup - the weight of grief, the power of emotional release, and how to stay anchored.

Wed, 12 Mar 2025 15:30:00 -0400

Breakups are hard, but if you have an anxious attachment style, they can feel almost unbearable. In this episode, I’m diving into why breakups hit so hard for AA women, the weight of fresh grief, and how to move through it with clarity and self-honoring choices.

We’ll talk about the power emotional release, the importance of clear boundaries (especially when no contact might be the best option), and how to stay anchored in your truth—even when it feels impossible.

_____

As always you're invited to join me in the Becoming Secure Membership for guided somatic practices, journal prompts, healing exercises, and live calls. Move with a group of other women towards your most secure self. 🧡

Click here for more info.

Mentioned in this episode:

Releasing the Grip of Anxious Attachment

Tue, 04 Mar 2025 13:30:00 -0400

It can feel like anxious attachment runs you. Doubt, fear of relationship ending, and low confidence are symptoms of something deeper that your body wants to release and heal.

_____

Becoming Secure Membership 🎆

Learn more here.

Mentioned in this episode:

How to Feel Secure on Valentine’s Day (Single or in Relationship)

Thu, 13 Feb 2025 09:00:00 -0400

Valentine’s Day can bring up a lot—comparison, overthinking, and that deep desire to be chosen. In this episode, we’re unpacking why V-Day feels so triggering for anxiously attached women and how to shift from chasing love to attracting it—starting with yourself.

Join the Becoming Secure membership, click for info

Here’s what we cover in this episode:

💔 How anxious attachment amplifies fears of rejection & abandonment on romantic holidays

📱 The IG highlight reel vs. reality (with real life examples)

🚫 Why Hollywood’s “grand gestures” & perfect Valentine’s fantasy are messing with your self-worth

✨ The shift from chasing love to becoming magnetic to it

💖 A guide to self-love rituals and choosing yourself first

Whether you’re single, in a relationship, or somewhere in between, this episode will help you feel more secure, grounded, and worthy—no external validation required. 💫

Join the Becoming Secure Membership

Mentioned in this episode:

The Most Relatable Q&A - Straight from the Membership

Sun, 26 Jan 2025 23:30:00 -0400

What is a genuine need and what is me attempting to seek validation? How can I leave conversations when I don’t like where it’s going but don’t want to be rude? I feel isolated because don’t look to others for support, I feel safe when I maintain the control what do I do?

During this episode I share answers to highly relatable questions from inside the Monthly Membership. Join for live calls, somatic practices, and to have me support you in your growth and healing process.

___

Did you like this style of episode? Let me know on Instagram.

Mentioned in this episode:

Become Secure within 1 Year - what it takes

Thu, 09 Jan 2025 06:00:00 -0400

In this episode, we dive into what it truly takes to become secure within one year. Whether you're healing anxious attachment, building self-trust, or creating healthier relationships, this conversation breaks down the key shifts, practices, and mindset changes required to transform your inner world. If you're ready to step into a version of yourself that feels calm, confident, and worthy of love, this episode is your roadmap to getting there. 🌟

Join the Becoming Secure Live Call membership and receive a 30% discount for the whole year 🧡.

Mentioned in this episode:

The Foundations of Self-Love You’ve Been Missing

Tue, 17 Dec 2024 07:45:00 -0400

If you’ve ever felt stuck on your self-love journey or wondered why it doesn’t feel as deep as you’d hoped, this episode is for you. Discover the essential practices, inner and outer work, and mindset shifts that create a true, lasting sense of self-worth.

✨ Go Deeper and Join the Becoming Secure Membership

When you join this women-only membership, you’ll discover how to:

calm your anxiety
heal from the past
stop self-sabotaging patterns

and become the

Secure, confident, empowered version of you who receives from life, is magnetic to what you want, and feels whole within herself. 🎇

Live calls, community + library space with teachings, prompts, and somatic practices for healing anxious attachment.

Join here. 🧡

Mentioned in this episode:

The Secret to Being Seen and Held: Love for the Strong Woman Who Feels Alone

Mon, 02 Dec 2024 07:30:00 -0400

You’ve always been the one who gets it done—the problem solver, the caretaker, or highly self-reliant. But under that strong exterior, there’s a part of you that feels anxious, unseen, or unsure in your closest relationships.

In this episode, we’re diving into the paradox of being a strong, high-achieving woman with anxious attachment tendencies, and the desire to feel TRULY seen and rest into a man. We’ll explore:

✔️ Why does “the capable one” get overlooked

✔️ Which past experiences of self-reliance create barriers to intimacy, and how can they be overcome

✔️ How can women who are used to "holding it all together" can learn to receive love and care

✔️ Why it’s so hard to ask for help or admit when you’re struggling

✔️ Practical ways to create partnerships where both supported and cherishedYou’ve always been the one who gets it done—the problem solver, the caretaker, or highly self-reliant. But under that strong exterior, there’s a part of you that feels anxious, unseen, or unsure in your closest relationships.

In this episode, we’re diving into the paradox of being a strong, high-achieving woman with anxious attachment tendencies, and the desire to feel TRULY seen and rest into a man. We’ll explore:

✔️ Why does “the capable one” get overlooked

✔️ Which past experiences of self-reliance create barriers to intimacy, and how can they be overcome

✔️ How can women who are used to "holding it all together" can learn to receive love and care

✔️ Why it’s so hard to ask for help or admit when you’re struggling

✔️ Practical ways to create partnerships where both supported and cherished

Resources Mentioned:

Quiz - Which Anxious Attachment Archetype Are You I mentioned the Calm and Collected Overthinker and the main aligning fit for this topic.

Connect with Johanna on Instagram. 🧡

✨ Go Deeper and Join the Becoming Secure Membership

When you join this women-only membership, you’ll discover how to:

calm your anxiety
heal from the past
stop self-sabotaging patterns

and become the

Secure, confident, empowered version of you who receives from life, is magnetic to what you want, and feels whole within herself. 🎇

Live calls, community + library space with teachings, prompts, and somatic practices for healing anxious attachment.

Join here. 🧡

Mentioned in this episode:

The Price You Pay for Anxious Attachment

Thu, 21 Nov 2024 08:00:00 -0400

Anxious attachment isn’t just an emotional struggle—it impacts every area of your life. From the endless overthinking to strained relationships, staying stuck in anxiety comes at a price.

In this episode, we’ll explore:

✔️ The emotional toll of living with anxious attachment

✔️ How it damages relationships and pushes people away

✔️ The financial costs of quick fixes versus real healing

✔️ Why prioritizing your healing is the ultimate investment in yourself

I also share real-life stories—from my own journey and clients I’ve worked with—about how anxious attachment patterns can drain your energy, time, and joy.

✨ Go Deeper and Join the Becoming Secure Membership

When you join this women-only membership, you’ll discover how to:

calm your anxiety
heal from the past
stop self-sabotaging patterns

and become the

Secure, confident, empowered version of you who receives from life, is magnetic to what you want, and feels whole within herself. 🎇

Live calls, community + library space with teachings, prompts, and somatic practices for healing anxious attachment.

Join here. 🧡

Mentioned in this episode:

Redefining Boundaries: Aligning Values, Needs, and Self-Respect

Thu, 14 Nov 2024 08:00:00 -0400

Creating boundaries that feel authentic, life-giving, and empowering.

In this episode, we explore how to set boundaries that reflect who you truly are.

Learn how to stop over-accommodating, start respecting your own limits, and find peace in boundaries that align with your life.

Also mentioned, the 5 Part, Master Your Boundaries Series, instant access within in the Becoming Secure membership.

Set yourself up for:

-Getting your needs met in a healthy way

-A strong ability to stay in alignment

-Feeling safe in relationships

-Building dreams with partners without losing yourself

-Clear and peaceful with your energy

✨Go Deeper and Join the Becoming Secure Membership

When you join this women-only membership, you’ll discover how to:

calm your anxiety
heal from the past
stop self-sabotaging patterns

and become the

Secure, confident, empowered version of you who receives from life, is magnetic to what you want, and feels whole within herself. 🎇

Live calls, community + library space with teachings, prompts, and somatic practices for healing anxious attachment.

Learn more about the membership!

Mentioned in this episode:

Healing What’s Buried Deep: My Journey with a Core Wound of Wrongness

Mon, 11 Nov 2024 07:00:00 -0400

Your framework for uncovering and healing the core wounds that may be hidden deep within. I share my experience of facing a core wound of ‘wrongness’ and the steps I took to move beyond it.

Learn how to identify your own buried beliefs, understand how they impact your relationships, and self worth, and start releasing the patterns that no longer serve you.

This episode offers both insight and practical steps for healing, so you can move closer to feeling secure, whole, and worthy.

✨Go Deeper and Join the Becoming Secure Membership

When you join this women-only membership, you’ll discover how to:

calm your anxiety
heal from the past
stop self-sabotaging patterns

and become the

Secure, confident, empowered version of you who receives from life, is magnetic to what you want, and feels whole within herself. 🎇

Live calls, community + library space with teachings, prompts, and somatic practices for healing anxious attachment.

Learn more about the membership!

Mentioned in this episode:

Attracting Situationships versus the Love of Your Life

Sat, 12 Oct 2024 11:00:00 -0400

What's the difference between the version of you who attracts emotionally unavailable, avoidant men, and the version of you who is attracting a partner who will choose you, and gives you the deep love you crave? This episode cracks it open and breaks in down. 🧡

Get the tools and practices to heal anxious attachment on the subconscious level:

If you listened to this episode, message me on Instagram, I'd love to hear from you!

✨Go Deeper and Join the Becoming Secure Membership

When you join this women-only membership, you’ll discover how to:

calm your anxiety
heal from the past
stop self-sabotaging patterns

and become the

Secure, confident, empowered version of you who receives from life, is magnetic to what you want, and feels whole within herself. 🎇

Live calls, community + library space with teachings, prompts, and somatic practices for healing anxious attachment.

Learn more about the membership!

Mentioned in this episode:

The 4 Anxious Attachment Archetypes

Tue, 24 Sep 2024 11:00:00 -0400

Learn about the 4 distinct anxious attachment archetypes that may be shaping your inner world and relationships: The Sensitive Soul, The Calm & Collected Overthinker, The Affection Enthusiast, and The Distant Dreamer.

I discuss how each archetype copes with triggers, their unique challenges, and what healing looks like for each type.

Take the quiz here. <<

Learn more about the membership!

Episode guide:

0:00 There are 4 different types of anxious attachment..

4:30 - 4 Archetypes Overview

9:15 The Sensitive Soul

12:06 The Calm & Collected Overthinker

16:22 The Affection Enthusiast

19:09 The Distant Dreamer

23:29 Summary of 4 Types

24:15 Healing the Distorted Coping Mechanisms

26:23 Refining Your Attachment Style

26:57 Take the Quiz

Mentioned in this episode:

Affirmations for Healing Anxious Attachment

Fri, 13 Sep 2024 08:00:00 -0400

Affirmations give our mind new and better ideas for empowering beliefs and new paths for our thoughts. Listen to this episode for 20 affirmations to rewire negative self beliefs and focus on healing anxious attachment tendencies. ❤️

Access the full practice within the Becoming Secure membership.

By joining the membership you also receive:

🪷 Coaching support from me, Johanna - a somatic therapy facilitator and inner work guide.

🪷 Live Q&A calls and workshops

🪷 Community of like minded women

10+ hours of:

🪷 Nervous system regulation practices

🪷 Healing Meditations

🪷 Psychology based teachings

🪷 Deep reflective journal exercises

🪷 And a new practice geared towards your healing every week

Join here.

How to Become Detached

Thu, 29 Aug 2024 11:30:00 -0400

Inspired by a question from a woman in the Becoming Secure membership I had to respond will a full episode because there is some major distortion around the word detached and how to be detached.

In this episode I discuss:

-Trauma bonds

-Love versus attachment

-Choosing better men

...and more!

Dive Deeper:

Hang on Instagram.

✨ ✨Go Deeper and Join the Becoming Secure Membership

When you join this women-only membership, you’ll discover how to:

calm your anxiety
heal from the past
stop self-sabotaging patterns

and become the

Secure, confident, empowered version of you who receives from life, is magnetic to what you want, and feels whole within herself. 🎇

Live calls, community + library space with teachings, prompts, and somatic practices for healing anxious attachment.

Learn more about the membership!

Mentioned in this episode:

Control Issues are Affecting your Mind, Body, and Relationships

Thu, 15 Aug 2024 08:00:00 -0400

Your need for control is fuelling your anxiety, pushing away love, and ironically..leaving you feeling more out of control.

In this episode, we explore the complexities of control and how unconsciously trying to control everything shapes our lives, drains our energy, and causes tension in relationships.

You'll learn:

How grasping for control affects you emotionally and physically
How control in an anxious attachment tendency and how it pushes away relationships and signifies a lack of trust
Signs of underlying control issues, like tight shoulders or clenched jaws
The link between anxiety, overthinking, and the need for control
Insights on releasing these patterns for a healthier, more balanced life
Key understandings for letting go, surrendering, and creating space for trust, ease, and peace in your life

✨Go Deeper and Join the Becoming Secure Membership

When you join this women-only membership, you’ll discover how to:

calm your anxiety
heal from the past
stop self-sabotaging patterns

and become the

Secure, confident, empowered version of you who receives from life, is magnetic to what you want, and feels whole within herself. 🎇

Live calls, community + library space with teachings, prompts, and somatic practices for healing anxious attachment.

Learn more about the membership!

Mentioned in this episode:

The 3 Steps of Inner Child Work

Wed, 31 Jul 2024 18:00:00 -0400

Exploring the concept of Inner Child work and what it means to heal your inner child.

Resources Mentioned:

Guided Practice - Inner Child Healing: Instantly accessible within the Becoming Secure library. Month-to-month access, cancel anytime.

Anxious Attachment Quiz: Which Anxious Attachment Archetype are You?

✨Go Deeper and Join the Becoming Secure Membership

When you join this women-only membership, you’ll discover how to:

calm your anxiety
heal from the past
stop self-sabotaging patterns

and become the

Secure, confident, empowered version of you who receives from life, is magnetic to what you want, and feels whole within herself. 🎇

Live calls, community + library space with teachings, prompts, and somatic practices for healing anxious attachment.

Learn more about the membership!

Mentioned in this episode:

Healing the Mother Wound

Tue, 25 Jun 2024 19:00:00 -0400

Exploring the 7 types of mothers and how they affect your attachment system.

-Overprotective Mother

-Critical Mother

-Emotionally Unavailable Mother

-Enmeshed 'Best Friend' Mother

-Narcissistic/Addict Mother

-Supportive Mother

-Absent Mother

Associated Practices, Meditation and Journal Prompts can be found in Becoming Secure my community and library space to go deep on the inner work. I would love to have you in there ❤️

✨ Join the Becoming Secure Membership

When you join this women-only membership, you’ll discover how to:

calm your anxiety
heal from the past
stop self-sabotaging patterns

and become the

Secure, confident, empowered version of you who receives from life, is magnetic to what you want, and feels whole within herself. 🎇

Live calls, community + library space with teachings, prompts, and somatic practices for healing anxious attachment.

Learn more about the membership!

Mentioned in this episode:

Healing the Father Wound

Tue, 07 May 2024 07:15:00 -0400

Analyzing 8 different father dynamics and why it's relevant to look at for our inner healing journey.

Mapping the patterns that drive us to:

-seek validation

-fear abandonment

-emotionally close

-attract men who 'need fixing'

-feel like we need to earn love

You'll learn how to free yourself from these patterns by identifying them and healing them through the body.

✨ Join the Becoming Secure Membership

When you join this women-only membership, you’ll discover how to:

calm your anxiety
heal from the past
stop self-sabotaging patterns

and become the

Secure, confident, empowered version of you who receives from life, is magnetic to what you want, and feels whole within herself. 🎇

Live calls, community + library space with teachings, prompts, and somatic practices for healing anxious attachment.

Learn more about the membership!

Mentioned in this episode:

Communicating Your Needs in Love - Letting Him See YOU

Fri, 26 Apr 2024 07:00:00 -0400

Holding back on your needs is not serving you in relationship. When we don't feel seen and loved we constrict and control. It is embracing authentic communication which will transforms your love dynamics, and nurture deeper connections. Let's talk about it.

✨Join the Becoming Secure Membership

When you join this women-only membership, you’ll discover how to:

calm your anxiety
heal from the past
stop self-sabotaging patterns

and become the

Secure, confident, empowered version of you who receives from life, is magnetic to what you want, and feels whole within herself. 🎇

Live calls, community + library space with teachings, prompts, and somatic practices for healing anxious attachment.

Learn more about the membership!

Mentioned in this episode:

What Ayahuasca Taught me About Anxiety

Wed, 17 Apr 2024 07:00:00 -0400

My ayahuasca plant medicine ceremony shared some profound insights as to what provokes anxiety and how we can avoid being run by it. In the episode I share the model I saw for understanding and eliminating anxiety, thoughts, overthinking, and fear.

Join the Becoming Secure Membership

When you join this women-only membership, you’ll discover how to:

calm your anxiety
heal from the past
stop self-sabotaging patterns

and become the

Secure, confident, empowered version of you who receives from life, is magnetic to what you want, and feels whole within herself. 🎇

Live calls, community + library space with teachings, prompts, and somatic practices for healing anxious attachment.

Learn more about the membership!

Mentioned in this episode:

All Things Somatic Work for Anxious Attachment

Fri, 05 Apr 2024 07:00:00 -0400

Why somatic work is key when it comes to making lasting change.

Why body based and nervous system work is not just helpful, but a requirement to your healing journey
Tracking your own subsconcious mind
Where you anxious tendencies live in the nervous system
Energy release to calm the system
What it looks like to do somatic work

Join the Becoming Secure Membership

When you join this women-only membership, you’ll discover how to:

calm your anxiety
heal from the past
stop self-sabotaging patterns

and become the

Secure, confident, empowered version of you who receives from life, is magnetic to what you want, and feels whole within herself. 🎇

Live calls, community + library space with teachings, prompts, and somatic practices for healing anxious attachment.

Learn more about the membership!

Mentioned in this episode:

Are you holding anger in your body?

Fri, 22 Mar 2024 08:00:00 -0400

In this episode we explore the importance of your relationship to anger. When we don't have a healthy expression of anger it can stay suppressed in the body which usually manifests as having a short fuse, pain, or feeling like you can't connect to your anger at all.

You'll learn:

-How to know if your anger is suppressed and why you might feel disconnected from anger

-Why we feel sensitive, easily irritated, or frustrated

-The conditioning of anger within women

-How to move it out of the body

✨ Join the Becoming Secure Membership

When you join this women-only membership, you’ll discover how to:

calm your anxiety
heal from the past
stop self-sabotaging patterns

and become the:

Secure
confident
empowered version of you who
receives from life
is magnetic to what you want
and feels whole within herself. 🎇

Live calls, community + library space with teachings, prompts, and somatic practices for healing anxious attachment.

Learn more about the membership!

Mentioned in this episode:

Finding closure when they won't give it to you

Thu, 07 Mar 2024 07:15:00 -0400

When a relationship ends anxious attachment personalities often feel a strong need for closure, replaying conversations in our minds and yearning for explanations. The fixation on closure stems from a primal urge to gain reassurance and understand why, but can often end up driving us into a spiral.

I'll share why closure is so important to you, and why the other person may not be willing to have a closure conversation.

I hope this episode can provide some solace and clarity amidst the chaos of heartbreak.

You can find the corresponding episode exercises and many more in the Becoming Secure library and community space.

✨ Join the Becoming Secure Membership

When you join this women-only membership, you’ll discover how to:

calm your anxiety,

heal from the past,

stop self-sabotaging patterns, and

become the Secure,

confident,

empowered version of you who receives from life,

is magnetic to what you want,

and feels whole within herself. 🎇

Live calls, community + library space with teachings, prompts, and somatic practices for healing anxious attachment.

Learn more here.

-Johanna

Mentioned in this episode:

BONUS: 5 Things I Did to Become Secure

Sun, 18 Feb 2024 09:00:00 -0400

I've extracted the 5 things that made real shifts when it came to my healing. I was inspired to create this episode after watching a tiktok with a similar title but hearing THEIR list was quite different. Anxious attachment manifests differently in different people, so I'm hoping this episode gives another relatable perspective.

Becoming Secure Membership

When you join this women-only membership, you’ll discover how to calm your anxiety, heal from the past, stop self-sabotaging patterns, and become the Secure, confident, empowered version of you who receives from life, is magnetic to what you want, and feels whole within herself. 🎇
Live calls, community + library space with teachings, prompts, and somatic practices for healing anxious attachment.

Learn More!

Mentioned in this episode:

Part 4: Anxious Attachment, Needs, and Manipulation...

Fri, 27 Oct 2023 07:00:00 -0400

The connection to our boundaries and needs is foundational to developing strong relationships that feel safe, nurturing, and supportive!

But what if asking for your needs feel scary?

What about the part of us that feels our needs are too much?

This episode will help you decide what your needs really are.

Go further 🌹

Find me on Tiktok or Instagram
Becoming Secure Membership - Live Q&A calls, teachings, somatic practices and more. Check it out here.

Big love!

-Johanna

Mentioned in this episode:

Part 3: The Core Strategy for Healing Anxious Attachment

Thu, 26 Oct 2023 07:00:00 -0400

This episode is thorough breakdown of what we need to understand an master of the journey to overcoming insecure attachment tendencies. Don't worry it's not complicated and you'll be able to pick it up easily.

Open your mind and heart and let this episode connect you deeper to yourself.

Go further 🌹

Find me on Tiktok or Instagram
Join the Becoming Secure Membership - my live call community, Q&A, + library space with teachings, prompts, and somatic practices for healing anxious attachment.

Mentioned in this episode:

Part 2: Mapping Your Unique Anxious Adaption

Thu, 26 Oct 2023 07:00:00 -0400

This episode has a somatic therapy based practice which is about to give you a new found awareness into your attachment tendencies.

You should do this practice while sitting, eyes closed, undistracted.

I know you're going to love it!

Go deeper - Join Becoming Secure; a library of practices and teachings to self heal, and live Q&A calls and somatic sessions.

Get support directly from Johanna inside 🕊️

Instagram - @johhhannamaria

Mentioned in this episode:

Part 1: Anxious Attachment Style Myths and Facts

Thu, 26 Oct 2023 07:00:00 -0400

Welcome to class!

You probably already know about attachment style so I only spend a bit of time defining the different tendencies; avoidant, anxious, disorganized.

I'll also break down myths around attachment style so that you can ensure that there isn't an unnecessary belief holding you back from healing.

You'll learn how attachment styles are formed and how and where they affect our relationships and relating dynamics.

I share why the Anxious - Avoidant loop happens (from both sides).

And finally I break down the typical tendencies of anxious attachers and provide direction on how to navigate the fears.

Enjoy the episode!

Warmly,

Johanna

___

Let's connect further 🌹

Find me on Tiktok and Instagram

For deeper Healing and Inner work practices here is my Becoming Secure community space with a library of content, live Q&A calls, and new practices each month! 🦋

Mentioned in this episode: