Repeat or Delete

Fort Boyard

Wed, 01 Apr 2026 02:00:00 +0100

We dive into Fort Boyard—a bizarre early-2000s game show where “celebrities” tackle confusing challenges in a French fort, guided (and mildly harassed) by Leslie Grantham and Melinda Messenger.

Expect:

Impossible challenges
Cryptic riddles
Constant swimming for keys
A dungeon, a spinning nightmare machine… and a gimp

Think The Crystal Maze—but messier, meaner, and making far less sense.

Verdict: Chaotic, confusing, weirdly entertaining. Probably should be deleted.

The Weakest Link

Wed, 18 Mar 2026 02:00:00 +0100

Apologies for our absence but life sometimes gets in the way of these things. Anyways, we are back with a new episode of Repeat or Delete and this time we are going way back to 2002 with a Celebrity Lookalike episode of The Weakest Link.

The show that brought Anne Robinson to the nations attention (make of that what you will) and inspire a whole generation of people to think that being a jerk was cool.

There's all the usual stuff as well as a secret message in there if you listen carefully

Wife Swap

Wed, 18 Feb 2026 02:00:00 +0100

Its back in time once again to 2005 Channel 4 docu-hell with Wife Swap. The show where two women swap houses and families and yell at each other.

This is apparently a classic episode starring Penny a woman with hair and another woman called Penny who also has hair. Imagine that!

There's talk of mulllets, boiled meat, chinese dynasties and the always popular "How will Planty get Thatcher into this anecdote"

Take Me Out

Wed, 21 Jan 2026 02:00:00 +0100

Continuing our dating show theme for some reason we take you back to the early 2010s with a classic episode of Take Me Out. There's really no way to describe the cocaine fuelled fever dream that this show is so watch/listen along yeah?

Blind Date

Tue, 06 Jan 2026 13:00:00 +0100

Before there was Love Island and Married at First Sight, there was Blind Date. Hosted by our second favourite scouser Cilla Black, the show has all the grace and charm of a dead horse tumbling towards an orphanage.

Sky Star Search

Tue, 06 Jan 2026 13:00:00 +0100

Before there was BTG, before there was X-Factor there was Sky Star Search. Like a non union Opportunity Knocks, Keith Chegwin hosted an insane talent show that is like a Adderall fuelled trip to Buckins.

A Very Hallmark Finale

Wed, 01 Oct 2025 02:00:00 +0100

"This is the way the podcast ends

Not with a bang but a whimper"

And with that kids, we are done. After nearly 200 episodes we have decided to call it a day. For purely altruistic reasons and not for reasons we cannot discuss.

So thank you all for listening throughout the years.

Do Not Delete The Feed.

Something is coming, in the darkness.

It cannot be seen, or stopped.

This is the link to the Petition we mention at the start about one chode getting his pants in a bunch about a book so go sign it and don't let these pricks tell you how to live.

https://chng.it/Jq64bzcdq7

Jailbreak

Wed, 24 Sep 2025 02:00:00 +0100

We are once again somehow in the Craig Charles Universe as we dive headlong into the 2000 C Channel 5 show "Jailbreak" which is sort of like if Big Brother watched The Great Escape while very very drunk.

Contestants have to escape from a fake prison by solving clues so esoteric its baffling. But you can win 100 grand so that's nice.

watch the whole glorious thing here yeah?

https://youtu.be/slUeKg-zbRA?si=07zPIvujtjHs34RZ

Dead Man Weds

Wed, 17 Sep 2025 02:00:00 +0100

This week we are joined by the fantastic Silent Mark, the worlds last true Renaissance man to take us through a bit of a forgotten British comedy gem, 2005's Dead Man Weds written by Dave Spikey and starring him and Johnny Vegas in a sort of earlier, better version of The Paper but with more nob jokes.

Also available on youtube if you like that sort of thing

Grand Designs

Wed, 03 Sep 2025 02:00:00 +0100

This week we are joined by the fantastic Gadget off of that Modern Escapism to take you through the story of a man who dared to dream but the dream was actually a dogshit sandwich covered in wasps. It is the classic episode of Grand Designs where Edward tries to build some kind of weird "lighthouse" on the coast but it is an absolute farce. The grounds to hard, the winds to strong and making things round is really really stupid.

But we have fun, and that is the main thing.

The Indoor League

Wed, 27 Aug 2025 02:00:00 +0100

How do?

The time has come for us to cover something that I have wanted to do for so long, the 1970s glorious mess that is The Indoor League. Its pub games but everyone is in beige and its a gorgeous thing. We are joined by Tom from Everything We Learned From The Simpsons as he is reet proper northern and that.

This is also available on YouTube and there's little extra jokes in there that I done and that. I learned video editing, sort of. Anyways, go watch and subscribe if you like that sort of thing. Be nice wouldn't it and cost you nothing

War of the Worlds (2025)

Wed, 13 Aug 2025 02:00:00 +0100

Something a little unusual from us this week as its a film from this year! I know right?

We are joined by the fantastic Ryan from Immaterial Gamers to go through what is quite possibly the worst film we have ever covered. Worse then Lady Circus, worse the that one with the clowns mucking about in the dark. It real bad folks.

You'll find out all about Pratfall Towers, why Amazon are great (honest), appropriate torniquet materials and why you should always turn left at the Han Solo.

The Mangler

Wed, 30 Jul 2025 02:00:00 +0100

So Castaway 2000 is now long behind us, and bereft of new ideas of things to do we decided to just go back to doing great bad films. And what a way to start off!

When an industrial mangle/steampress develops a taste for human blood only one cop, one old man and guy that possibly was in Pink Floyd can stop it. Starring Buffalo Bill and Freddie Krueger what we have is some of the most insane nonsense. And its great.

You'll hear all about antacids, lathes and what constitutes a morgue.

Pod-Castaway 2000: What Happened Next?

Wed, 23 Jul 2025 02:00:00 +0100

Our time on the island has come to an end and about halfway through this we decided to write down what we thought happened to the castaways once they left the island.

Some of it is true.

Normal service will resume soon but if you have anything you want us to possibly cover you can get us in all the usual places yeah?

Pod-Castaway 2000: Getting it in the air

Wed, 16 Jul 2025 02:00:00 +0100

And just like that its all over.

After a year on the island, our beloved Castaways are leaving and we get another sort of highlights package of the time they spent together as well as some new stuff about the lovely Christmas they had (minus the ham) and some other bits and pieces. We also get to see them leave the island for the last time and honestly, it's all very very emotional.

Thank you all for coming on this journey with us, its been informative, fun and educational (like 30 thousand dead English)

If you do want to watch along with us, this is where we watched and you honestly really should too.

https://youtube.com/@horgabostorbust?si=WKVnyD5At5LlzPHP

Thank you

Pod-Castaway 2000: Some of this lot think they're are in Bucklins!

Wed, 02 Jul 2025 02:00:00 +0100

The end is in sight for our castaways as they prepare to leave Taransay for the last time and we get some greatest moments, some behind the scenes bonus footage and Ray pops up to do some... Ray things.

We also find out about teabags, kebab talk and the mysterious Taransay 5 is revealed!

Pod-Castaway 2000: Thirty Thousand Dead English

Wed, 25 Jun 2025 02:00:00 +0100

Were still hovering about the clips sadly, because Lion TV are terrible at their job. but we manage to wangle a few laughs out of a dire situation.

We get old faces returning, Plantys hatred of old people and sheep transplants.

Pod-Castaway 2000: The Cuck Hammock

Wed, 18 Jun 2025 02:00:00 +0100

Our time on the island is coming to an end and the production team have got NOTHING to put in these shows so its a lot of old clips spliced in with some new stuff. The TV show that is, not this.

We find out all about the dirty dirty love loves of some of the younger castaways as well as some behind the scenes footage of caffeine related assaults. The Ghost of Ray makes an appearance and there is some lovely footage of the island but yeah.

Its gets better I promise

Pod-Castaway 2000: ¿Que Restaurante?

Wed, 11 Jun 2025 02:00:00 +0100

Things are winding down on the island now and everyone just seems to be mucking about and having a laugh. We get two episodes of Through the Pod-Hole with Toby from Leeds and Trev and Ben takes us on a tour of the Posh house.

There is also great sadness as Lady the cow leaves the island with her baby cow (or calf if you will) but on the other side, all the booze arrives for one last big hurrah!

Pod-Castaway 2000: Kombucha of the Sea

Wed, 04 Jun 2025 02:00:00 +0100

The day we have all been waiting for has finally arrived!

Yes, that's right, the first annual Castaway Booze Tournament is in full effect. Who will win, who will lose and who will get very drunk and make an idiot of themselves.

We also get a good bit of info on island life, how they all keep clean and a great bit of toilet fun.

Pod-Castaway 2000: She's got Milk Fever!

Wed, 21 May 2025 02:00:00 +0100

There is no homebrew contest this week because the usual amount of chaos has once again descended onto the island.

Its Bens birthday and Col and the lads try to explode him, there's deer based moral conundrums and the islanders welcome another among them. On a full moon.

Also, be sure to eat your calcium kids!

Pod-Castaway 2000: Smokin' all the Pork for Christmas

Wed, 14 May 2025 02:00:00 +0100

A sense of calm has descended on our castaways this week as the most exciting thing that's happening is a homebrew contest. That's it.

There's also talk of illicit trysts, job descriptions, kitchen related hijinks, a weird Through the Keyhole game and the Children in Need song what they done.

Pod-Castaway 2000: Death Row Hounds

Wed, 07 May 2025 02:00:00 +0100

Its visitors week on Taransay and everyone has visitors come to stay a while.

There's talk of toilet etiquette, Poly Tunnel Tours and actual pig murder.

There's some bittersweet moments too as we have more people leaving the island, some of them more well known to us then others.

Pod-Castaway 2000: Primal Chair Throwing

Wed, 30 Apr 2025 02:00:00 +0100

Another week on the lovely island of Taransay sees yet more Castaways leaving as well as horse and her wobbly child.

Yes, despite all his previous tantrums and that, Ron finally agrees to leave much to the delight of everyone else on the island.

There's unpaid vets bills, vets cutting of bits and other stuff that doesn't even have a vet in it!

Planty & John are walking 25 miles in one day for Teesside Hospice in the memory of listener James Allen

If you can spare a few quid please donate at:

justgiving.com/page/100thingspod

100thingswelearnedfromfilm.co.uk

Thank you

Pod-Castaway 2000: The Slaughter Boyz

Wed, 23 Apr 2025 02:00:00 +0100

Trigger Warning: This Episode deals with issues of homophobia, racism and domestic violence. If this may be in anyway upsetting to you, please skip and we will see you down the road.

Things are coming to a head on the island with everybody annoyed at everyone else for reasons both real and imagined. We get dog death, kitchen yelling and Peter getting a telling off.

There's Dodgy bands, dirty baths and MR PIPES!

Planty & John are walking 25 miles in one day for Teesside Hospice in the memory of listener James Allen

If you can spare a few quid please donate at:

justgiving.com/page/100thingspod

100thingswelearnedfromfilm.co.uk

Thank you

Pod-Castaway 2000: A Load of Washed Up Boys

Wed, 16 Apr 2025 02:00:00 +0100

Ahoy there!

Yes we are still doing Castaway 2000 and yes, it is getting better. While Ray may have left the island in disgrace, his tarnished legacy lives in in the burning of a wicker man that causes concern. There is also exciting horse news, a trip to the mainland and a lot of door slamming.

Also Uncle Planty reads us a horrific story about pipes, welks and sheep. So just be aware.

Planty & John are walking 25 miles in one day for Teesside Hospice in the memory of listener James Allen

If you can spare a few quid please donate at:

justgiving.com/page/100thingspod

100thingswelearnedfromfilm.co.uk

Thank you

Pod-Castaway 2000: It's a shame about Ray

Wed, 09 Apr 2025 02:00:00 +0100

It is with a sad heart and a damaged liver we say goodbye to the first castaway to leave the island of their own volition.

But do not be too downhearted dear listener because the rest of them now have pigs, paint and a mirror called Jolene. We get more Tales from Grandpa Planty, Lofty facts are still very water based and there's a lovely poem to see us out.

Planty & John are walking 25 miles in one day for Teesside Hospice in the memory of listener James Allen

If you can spare a few quid please donate at:

justgiving.com/page/100thingspod

100thingswelearnedfromfilm.co.uk

Thank you

Pod-Castaway 2000: Also, I were legless

Wed, 02 Apr 2025 02:00:00 +0100

Patience is running thin on the island, with Ray abandoning his meatballs, the school being to moist for humans and Ben lying about his beard growing abilities. Yes we are back with episode 7 of Castaway 2000, the only show that has weather as a featured guest. We also get introduced to Storytime with Planty

Planty & John are walking 25 miles in one day for Teesside Hospice in the memory of listener James Allen

If you can spare a few quid please donate at:

justgiving.com/page/100thingspod

100thingswelearnedfromfilm.co.uk

Thank you

Pod-Castaway 2000: There's a Medusa on the Island

Wed, 26 Mar 2025 02:00:00 +0100

Castaway 2000 continues with the aftermath of Rays drunken outburst, Peter gets on everyone's nerves with aggressive minute keeping and animals arrive on the island. Cows, sheep and a pony to be exact and lets see how long they last. The housing pods are nearly finished, the doctors are inbound and Ron is threatening children with a fun time.

Its getting really good.

Planty & John are walking 25 miles in one day for Teesside Hospice in the memory of listener James Allen

If you can spare a few quid please donate at:

justgiving.com/page/100thingspod

100thingswelearnedfromfilm.co.uk

Thank you

Pod-Castaway 2000: The Pact of Windermere

Wed, 19 Mar 2025 02:00:00 +0100

We're still on our Castaway 2000 jaunt and now near enough everyone is on the island, ready to go. Except the Doctors family, Ron and some others who are stuck in a haunted Toby Carvery for some reason.

Ray continues to slide into drunken madness, we get the first of the Video Diaries and tensions are running high over minor squabbles. The islanders also celebrate Burns Night and tempers spill over into an almost ruck between.... well you'll have to listen. (its Ray)

Planty & John are walking 25 miles in one day for Teesside Hospice in the memory of listener James Allen

If you can spare a few quid please donate at:

justgiving.com/page/100thingspod

100thingswelearnedfromfilm.co.uk

Thank you

Pod-Castaway 2000: Paperwork & Packing

Wed, 12 Mar 2025 02:00:00 +0100

Thank you for joining us once again as we struggle on through Castaway 2000 with Episode 4 where both groups of chosen get together for the first time and immediately fall out over contracts and beard assignment.

But they're all on the island now. Right? Right?!

Planty & John are walking 25 miles in one day for Teesside Hospice in the memory of listener James Allen

If you can spare a few quid please donate at:

justgiving.com/page/100thingspod

100thingswelearnedfromfilm.co.uk

Thank you

Pod-Castaway 2000: Git it in the Water!

Wed, 05 Mar 2025 02:00:00 +0100

We plod ever onwards with our misguided attempt at doing something new with episode 3 of Castaway. We are introduced to "The Other Group" of miscreants and ne'er do wells who are competing for a space on the Scottish island of Taransay with the rest of them.

You'll get Lofty wisdom (and Lofty Facts!), the worst assault course ever, mans conquest of fire and we find out the cracks are already beginning to show on the island.

Planty & John are walking 25 miles in one day for Teesside Hospice in the memory of listener James Allen

If you can spare a few quid please donate at:

justgiving.com/page/100thingspod

100thingswelearnedfromfilm.co.uk

Thank you

Pod-Castaway 2000: Survival of the Lofty-est

Wed, 26 Feb 2025 02:00:00 +0100

Things are heating up this week as our intrepid would-be wilderness survivors must learn to operate tarpaulin, kill a chicken and fight each other (not to the death sadly)

King Lofty spins his unique wisdom while contemplating becoming a king of the frontier and badger causes mild chaos. We also find out who has been successful in their application, who has not and what they would bring to the island as a "luxury item" .

All the episode we will be covering are available here

https://youtu.be/nccfWjdT0LM?si=w5LCYkIKnWAFm9ox

so get them watched and tell us who you think is going in the wicker man first!

Pod-Castaway 2000: The Fogle-ing

Wed, 19 Feb 2025 02:00:00 +0100

This week and over the coming weeks we are going to take you through the rightfully forgotten BBC reality survival show Castaway 2000 for no other reason then we really love it apparently.

That's right, for the next few weeks/months/until we get tired and forget you're going to hear all about a show that is a quarter of a century old. But don't let that put you off, this is some the absolute best television even made in the history of humanity.

30 odd people dumped on a remote Scottish island trying to build a community in a blatant afront to all the gods.

Episode 1 deals with a whole bunch of people trying out to be selected including a very angry Tom Baker-a-like, the oldest man in the world and some posh families.

Its a wild ride, so please join us.

Airline

Wed, 05 Feb 2025 02:00:00 +0100

Come fly with me, lets fly, lets fly away. But please do remember to bring an in date passport yeah?

We're back to maximum strength this week as we take you through the "best" of the late '90s fly on the wall shows, the mighty Airline. While most of the show is people angry that they aren't allowed onto actual planes without legitimate documents there are also genuine nuggets of gold in there and our new favourite person, Notorious tennis enthusiast BJ who is absolutely glorious.

Get it in your ears

Shafted!

Wed, 22 Jan 2025 02:00:00 +0100

James is away this week so Planty and Joe are left to their own devices and choose to take you through the short lived and incredibly confusing "quiz" show Shafted! hosted by everyone's favourite whammer Robert Kilroy-Silk.

Its a bewildering game where nobody seems to know what's going on and cant really be bothered to make an effort. No wonder it only ran for 4 episodes eh?

Normal service will resume shortly we promise

Don't Tell the Bride

Wed, 08 Jan 2025 02:00:00 +0100

Happy New Year!

We are back on our reality TV nonsense this week with a delightful episode of Don't Tell the Bride where idiot men are given money to plan horrible weddings for the supposed love of their lives.

In this episode a man who's whole personality is Army and Carling plans a WW2 themed wedding for his fiancé who is a.....beautician? Yes us neither.

Find out about wooden planes, drunken bulldogs and excessive use of the word "Vintagey"

The Merry Gentlemen aka The Dull Monty

Tue, 24 Dec 2024 02:00:00 +0100

We got into the sweet sherry a bit early this year so here's our slightly tipsy review of the new Netflix nonsense The Merry Gentlemen, the classic Christmas story of taking your top off to save a witches music venue.

You'll hear all about improbable career roles, impractical short term goals to raise money and Joe gets weirdly obsessed with nobs.

We were a little bit drunk when we recorded this (its Christmas) so yeah.

Have a very Happy Christmas or whatever you celebrate and we shall see you soon

Hot Frosty

Tue, 10 Dec 2024 02:00:00 +0100

Yeah, we know everyone else is reviewing it but in the words of the late, great Dolores O'Riordan "everyone else is doing it, so why cant we"?

Hotel Hell

Tue, 26 Nov 2024 21:15:00 +0100

This week we dip our toe back in to the slime filled Gordon swimming pool as we take you through a Cher-Tastic episode of Hotel Hell. It's Kitchen Nightmares but with a lot more semen apparently.

You'll find out about plastic plaster, the least successful hotel coup in existence and what you should always have for breakfast.

Robot Wars

Wed, 13 Nov 2024 02:00:00 +0100

Awooga!

This week to complete our Craig Charles triangle were taking you through the much loved cyborg gladiator nonsense that is Robot Wars (season 9 episode 2) purely for a reason that becomes apparent.

If you are not familiar with the concept, teams of nerds, mechanical wizards and for some reason children build and then battle huge armoured robots in an arena that has spikes and fire and that. It's honestly really good.

You will learn all about secret voices, Italian hands and why Noel Sharkey is a big fat liar

Ghostwatch

Wed, 30 Oct 2024 02:00:00 +0100

As its the scary season we thought we would bring you a terrifying moment from our childhoods in the shape of the 1992 absolute masterpiece Ghostwatch with Parkie and Lister and Greeny and the other bloke.

Broadcast as a live ghost hunt on actual Halloween night, this is tale of duplicity, horror and wanking in the high backed chair at a reasonably price hotel chain.

Happy Halloween yeah

Knightmare

Wed, 16 Oct 2024 02:00:00 +0100

Welcome stranger!

This week as part of our "people with stuff on their head failing basic tasks" series we bring you a classic episode of the fondly remembered and rightly so kids show Knightmare. A simple premise of youths guiding their behelmeted friend through a sort of non union D&D dungeon to win a prize or most likely die by falling off a ledge.

Its honestly brilliant.

You can hear all about Barry The Brave, confusing cubes, HobGoblin facts! and the only protestant march in the seven kingdoms!

All of this is on youtube and we cannot recommend it enough.

Cyberzone

Wed, 02 Oct 2024 02:00:00 +0100

Shut up Cyber Phil!

This week we take you back to 1993 then Virtual Reality was the future and you could legitimately make a gameshow based on that alone. We are of course talking about Cyberzone the short lived but fondly remembered Craig Charles technology based "Adventure" game where the rules don't matter and the points matter even less.

You will hear all about fringed jackets, pointless Wii games, correct helicopter uses and the worst prize we have ever seen.

The episode we reviewed is up on youtube if you want to watch beforehand but honestly, its better if you dont.

Time Commanders

Wed, 18 Sep 2024 02:00:00 +0100

This week we take you all the way back to 2003 with an episode of the fantastic and weirdly forgotten Time Commanders. Its sort of a bit like Risk but with way more shouting and abject failure.

You will hear all about Milton Keynes infrastructure, polo shirt envy, dead 50s rock stars, being unable to see the wood for the trees, Archers, The Archers and Jeffery Archer and some actual historical knowledge from James.

4 in a Bed : Plugs & Poached Eggs

Wed, 04 Sep 2024 02:00:00 +0100

Still ploughing our way through the reality TV world and this week its a "fan" request, as we take you through a classic week of the daytime B&B squabble fest Four in a Bed. Imagine Come Dine with Me but its people that own weird hotels and want to be YOUR friend.

You'll hear all about egg contraptions, the worst game to play with strangers, the cost of 1 fly, creepy ringmasters and how much technology is too much technology?

If you have any suggestions for shows you want us to cover let us know by all the usual methods. Or just yell them at us in the street like everyone else does yeah?

Come Dine with Me

Wed, 21 Aug 2024 02:00:00 +0100

Continuing on with our reality TV theme were doing for some reason we bring you this week Season 43 Episode 8 of the long running cookery bastard show Come Dine with me where 5 random people have to host consecutive dinner parties in the hope of winning a grand. A simple enough premise but its always an entertaining watch due to the misguided dreams of the contestents.

This episode is all about Claire who serves everything on a plank, has only a wok to cook in and makes possibly the worst chips we have ever seen.

There are clips of the show on YouTube and it is on the 4 app if you live in the UK.

Prawns

Plantys Kitchen Nightmares

Tue, 06 Aug 2024 21:15:00 +0100

Something a little different as a temporary filler until we are all back together as we take you through a classic episode of Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA as its something Joe and Mark love greatly and its something we have wanted to try for a bit now.

You'll hear all about floor food, Marks virginity and the best off brand Ghostbusters theme you never heard.

The whole episode is available on here https://youtu.be/pHchw-J91qE?si=6CPmyBycfIGG1JZK

and if this is something that you like we can do more of them. We probably will anyways

Paging Mr Darcy

Thu, 25 Jul 2024 02:00:00 +0100

James & Joe are back after a prolonged Genie related incident to take you through a proper Hallmark for the first time in a long time, the 2024 classic Paging Mr Darcy.

The story of a dull woman, a dull man and the most annoying sister in the world. You'll hear all about catering biffers, James experimental one man show and the formation of Mansfield Chunk

Guilty Pleasures - Punisher: Warzone (with Pat Veil)

Thu, 27 Jun 2024 02:00:00 +0100

This week we are joined by the fantastically talented Mr Pat Veil to go through the 2008 classic Punisher: Warzone or The Most Violent Marvel Film to Date as it should be known.

You will hear all about bullet sprinklers, Dennis Nedry facts, tales of Pats dashed boyhood dreams and Plantys one impression he can do.

Its a little more relaxed in the edit this week simply because talking to Pat is lovely experience and he definitely classes up the joint.

Go follow his social media but most importantly listen to his music, he's really really good.

https://linktr.ee/patveil

Little Hercules in 3D

Thu, 13 Jun 2024 02:00:00 +0100

Joe has been abandoned but thankfully the lovely Jay has stepped in to take him through another Hulk Hogan film, this time the 2009 classic Little Hercules in 3D although it wasn't in 3D. Starring Terrible Terry, The Big Show Tall Paul and the little buff boy you all remember from them memes a few years back. Its a simple tale of Hercules, Socrates and somehow Draculas wife going to Burbank to win a decathlon or something.

You will hear all about toilet phones, the worst teacher yet, hoarding children and the best special effect we have ever seen.

You can find Jay over on The Untitled Wrestling Podcast or if you don't like wrestling he also does One Nation Under Ted: A Ted Lasso Podcast that is.... well you can work it out i'm sure.

Guilty Pleasures: The Covenant (2006)

Thu, 30 May 2024 02:00:00 +0100

Planty is back and we go all moody as we take you through the 2006 sort of goth classic The Covenant starring a load of high cheekboned lads of indeterminate faces in a film that's a bit like The Craft if you remove everything that is good and replace it with old tiramisu.

You'll find out about imaginary spiders, the coolest mum in the world, CROTCH ROCKETS, the best chores for a growing boy and if the mayor finally got the upgrade.

Guilty Pleasures: StreetFighter (1994)

Thu, 16 May 2024 02:00:00 +0100

As people are away on holiday, getting married or have been drafted into the French Foreign Legion we decided to do a little mini series of peoples favourite bad movies and what better way to kick off then with the daddy of them all, Jean-Claude Van Dammes video game masterpiece Streetfighter.

Were joined by the John from Dammit Vacant and the lovely Ethan Edwards as we find out how much JCVD got paid, the dangers of actual knives, evil Youtube, correct stealth visor usage, the Bison Price Index and what happened to Kylie in her 3 lost days!

THIS CONCLAVE IS OVER!

James Stag Do Special! Cronus: Plug into the afterlife! LIVE!

Wed, 24 Apr 2024 02:00:00 +0100

Welcome to a very very special episode of Hallmark of Greatness where we celebrate the upcoming wedding of James and Katie by watching the 2017 Masterpeice "Cronus" live and in my front room. The audio may be bad but the joy is real as we take you through the story of a man who loses his mind or does he?

Joined by terrible audio guy Brother James we take you through the delights of white vinegar, abandoned airfields and the delights of GRANERY BAPS.

If for some reason you want to watch along heres a link. you maniac

https://youtu.be/bDnx2cBrSq4?si=alNC6Xz4kgfs6ouw

Last Orders: Star Slammer

Thu, 11 Apr 2024 02:00:00 +0100

We got confused over the bank holiday weekend but we are back bringing you a slice of fried 80's gold with Star Slammer. The story of a woman sent to a spaceship prison for putting a mans hand in jam after he exploded a wizard and pinned it on her. There is all the usual nonsense you have come to expect as well as Non-Union Sandpeople, the worst canteen in the world, crotch truncheons ahoy and an ending nobody really understood.

Get it in thine ears

Irish Wish

Sun, 17 Mar 2024 00:00:00 +0100

Come join us in our St Patricks day special as we lead you by the hand through 2024s Irish Wish starring The Lohan and Jane Seymour.

The simple tale of an unrequited love, a lakeside menace and one cool knee to the groin.

We are joined by Monorants again who tell us everything we need to know about Irish fast travel , the saints that made us and mono pooing near a cliff.

Sláinte

Last Orders: Escape from the Bronx

Thu, 07 Mar 2024 02:00:00 +0100

Its another sequel but its not intentional, the follow up to Bronx Warrior leads us down a filthy path of bad genocides, really familiar actors and obscene motorbike abuse.

Come listen to the tail of Trash, that Joey Ramone looking guy as he fights the man, himself, his parents and several planks of wood.

Nature of Love

Wed, 21 Feb 2024 02:00:00 +0100

Back on the sweet sweet Hallmark trail, this week we bring you the 2020 classic Nature of Love, the simple tale of a daft lass and rugged man. Plus so many Simpsons jokes its not even cool anymore.

You will hear all about Kiss Chase the Camp Butler, A.I. bear attacks, horrible big salads, Welsh rapping and Mr Stevens the lake pike.

This weeks synopsis machine is sponsored by Cheese.

Last Orders: Tales of the Ancient Kingdom

Thu, 08 Feb 2024 02:00:00 +0100

We got a twofer in this episode with our first ever sequel and first ever returning guests, the lovely folks from Monorants as we take you through the Kevin Sorbo vehicle Tales of the Ancient Kingdom which is a sequel to The Sword and the Sorcerer.

You will find out about overuse of flashbacks, cardboard cities, forbidden sexual practices, cloak pass the parcel, christmas decorations and rug based pratfalls.

Hello, It's Me

Thu, 25 Jan 2024 00:15:00 +0100

The gangs all back together for our first Hallmark film of the year, the 2015 classic "Hello, It's Me".

The simple story of a woman who's husband is lost at sea and still gets great cellphone reception. Also features annoying kids, the worst superhero ever and that fella that looks like a melted Steth Mcfarlane.

The Big HoG Quiz of the Year

Thu, 11 Jan 2024 02:00:00 +0100

As a little break before we plough back into the fetid quagmire of our usual subject matter, we decided as per the tradition to have a small break and play James' Quiz of the Year which relies on us being able to remember things about the films we have reviewed this year.

It goes about as well as you would expect really (that is, James tries his best and everyone else just mucks about like daft kids)

Last Orders: It's a Wonderful Knife

Thu, 21 Dec 2023 02:00:00 +0100

As a Christmas treat to ourselves we decided to cover a film that should be terrible but is surprisingly great with 2023s Its a Wonderful Knife. Its not just a terrible pun!

We would also like to say thank you to everyone who has listened, shared or helped us out in any way this year. It's been tough but we made it to the end.

We also know that Christmas is a rough time of year for a lot of people and so if you are feeling low or whatever just know that there are services out there that can help you, not just at this time of year but whenever you need them.

Samaritans Open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year

Call: 116 123

Papyrus

Hopeline UK for children and young people under the age of 35 who are experiencing thoughts of suicide and anyone concerned that a young person could be thinking about suicide.

Call: 0800 068 4141

Calm Open 5pm – Midnight every day

Call: 0800 58 58 58

Shout Crisis Text Service

A free confidential number you can text any time – day or night. Text SHOUT to 85258 to get text support

Switchboard – LGBT+ Helpline

Call: 0300 330 0630

Open 10:00 – 22:00 every day

Or if none of that appeals and you just want to talk bollocks with some idiots, both ours and Marks twitter DMS and stuff will be open so get us on there.

Have a Happy and safe Christmas you lovely lovely bastards

Mister Scrooge to See You

Thu, 07 Dec 2023 02:00:00 +0100

We are heading into Christmas season and with that in mind we bring you the 2013 classic "Mr Scrooge to See You" starring David Ruprecht as some kind of Scrooge who has to go into the future to stop Bob Cratchits offspring from being a Neo-Miser or something. Its very long and nothing happens for a lot of it.

You'll hear all about Zammo's calculator, homeless teeth, terrible business sense, the worst santa in the world, EDM soundtracks, oil drum fires and James best Only Fools & Horses impression ever!

Last Orders: At the Earth's Core

Thu, 23 Nov 2023 02:00:00 +0100

Look at this! An almost proper film. Some might say that we have lost our way somewhat but those people would be liars who deserve to be swung about by a Mahar captain.

We are of course talking about the 1976 classic At the Earth's Core starring Doug "Doug" McClure and Peter "Whoopee" Cushing in a tale about blokes drilling erm.. to the earths core. There they meet strange pig faced men and strange rubbery beasts as well as ladies with not many clothes on!

You will hear so many Simpsons jokes, the sounds of prehistoric monsters, Sexy Eggs, important field advice for drilling and James' favourite banner in a film so far!

The Thanksgiving House

Thu, 09 Nov 2023 02:00:00 +0100

As we wend our way deep into autumn (or fall if you are like that) we bring to you 2013s The Thanksgiving house, the simple story or a law lady who inherits a house with a mysterious secret. No not like murder or anything, a nice secret.

You will hear all about correct knotweed removal, core samples, the worst post office ever, BLOGS!, so much steak and a nice story about a river.

Last Orders: WolfCop

Thu, 26 Oct 2023 00:30:00 +0100

Running headlong into the spookiest of weeks we present to you 2014's WolfCop which is as dumb as it sounds. The story of a Canadian cop who for reasons is turned into a werewolf and yeah, I don't know either.

You'll hear all about donuts, bad druids, Marc Bolan, correct egg preparation and many other things in a film that should not be.

Last Orders: Beyond Sherwood Forest

Wed, 27 Sep 2023 00:15:00 +0100

Robin Hood: Beyond Sherwood Forest

We may have been away for a little while but we are back now, to take you through the most accurate Robin Hood film since that one with the snake voiced by Terry Thomas. and that had a talking snake.

You'll hear all about poor arrow technique, the songs of Space Sting, James suffering from a malady and Mark defending his beloved hometown through the traditional jokes.

Palm Springs

Thu, 24 Aug 2023 02:00:00 +0100

We are joined this week by a familiar voice to take you through the 2020 classic Palm Springs starring Jake Peralta and that angry guy from the Spiderman films. Yeah, we know its not a Hallmark film but we think we have earned this as a treat.

As usual its the normal mix of time travel, confusion and wondering what is it that makes a name.

Last Orders: Deathstalker

Thu, 10 Aug 2023 02:00:00 +0100

We are back dipping our toe into the world of '80s sword and sorcery this week with the classic Deathstalker. A film about a man who...stalks death? Not in a creepy 'stealing your underpants' type way but a scary stabbing way.

You'll hear all about reusable wax heads, the perils of jogging, houses made of wigs, strange boy-men, how to walk about boobily and a concise history of UK shot putt legend Geoff Capes!

Mark is walking 1 million steps over the next 3 months to raise money for Diabetes UK. We never ask you for money for the podcast but if you wanna donate some money to a charity then hit up

https://step.diabetes.org.uk/fundraising/mark868

and make him suffer!

The Birthday Wish

Thu, 03 Aug 2023 02:00:00 +0100

Its Joes birthday week and hes very very tired. So please enjoy this yeah?

Last Orders: Land Shark

Thu, 20 Jul 2023 01:00:00 +0100

This week we take you through the 2017 film Land Shark starring people who have never done acting before, a man who has never done special effects before and some of the best free music a scoundrel can steal.

You'll hear all about correct shark maintenance, the infernal beep machine, hoovers and the best quiz you will ever hear about our terrifying aquatic friends.

For the Love of Chocolate

Thu, 13 Jul 2023 02:00:00 +0100

The Higgens fam are back after illness, dogs and just a general sense of ennui to bring you the hottest film of 2021 starring Rhiannon Fish, the classic For the Love of Choclate.

Imagine that other film we did a while back about bathbombs yeah. Its that but with chocolate. I don't kno what to tell you really. Sorry?

Last Orders : Alone for Christmas

Thu, 29 Jun 2023 02:00:00 +0100

We finish our Half-Christmas special with the heart-warming classic Alone for Christmas or Bone Alone as its also known. The simple story of Home Alone but with talking dogs in it. None of them do a funky rap either which is a missed opportunity if you ask me.

You will find out about, Toy Story Kart Racing, the most highbrow joke we've ever made, the most low broke joke we ever made, dog escape plans, Hollyoaks and our new found love for Jonathan Nation!

Mark is walking 1 million steps over the next 3 months to raise money for Diabetes UK. We never ask you for money for the podcast but if you wanna donate some money to a charity then hit up

https://step.diabetes.org.uk/fundraising/mark868

Last Orders: Christmas Bounty

Thu, 22 Jun 2023 00:30:00 +0100

The end is in sight as we lurch towards the end of Half Chistmas with the 2013 classic Christmas Bounty starring The Miz out of wrestling and some other people.

You will hear all about Nativity based smugness, dubious wrestling knowledge, Tory party rage, Joes takeaway order, chocolate based jokes for no one and a whole lot of Christmas innuendo.

Mark is walking 1 million steps over the next 3 months to raise money for Diabetes UK. We never ask you for money for the podcast but if you wanna donate some money to a charity then hit up

https://step.diabetes.org.uk/fundraising/mark868

and make him suffer!

Journey Back to Christmas

Thu, 15 Jun 2023 00:30:00 +0100

Its hotter then a vindaloo eating contest near the mouth of an active volcano but we plough on foolishly with this weeks Junemas offering, Journey Back to Christmas from 2016. The story of a nurse hurled through time in her special "Time-Shed" to find out what the real meaning of Christmas is or something.

Honestly folks, it was so warm that our hearts were not really in this but there are still some good jokes and that.

Mark is walking 1 million steps over the next 3 months to raise money for Diabetes UK. We never ask you for money for the podcast but if you wanna donate some money to a charity then hit up

https://step.diabetes.org.uk/fundraising/mark868

And James is running 10km for Mind, which I think we can all agree is a great cause so give him a few bob if you can too yeah

https://t.co/jIErImGWYo

Last Orders: Black Xmas

Thu, 08 Jun 2023 00:45:00 +0100

Rolling merrily into Junemas, Joe and Mark take you through the 2006 remake of Black Xmas, a Christmas horror film starring our favourite Lacey Chabert as girl 3 and Buffys sister as girl 5. They may have names, we didn't bother to find out.

You'll hear all about Cilla Blacks Comeback Special, fake southerners, Chekhovs Unicorn, fake ovens, polyphonic ringtones and Mark crams in a Thatcher reference in record time!

Also Mark is walking 1 million steps over the next 3 months to raise money for Diabetes UK. We never ask you for money for the podcast but if you wanna donate some money to a charity then hit up

https://step.diabetes.org.uk/fundraising/mark868

and make him suffer!

A Christmas to Savour

Thu, 01 Jun 2023 00:30:00 +0100

With Junemas being upon us once again, we here at Hallmark of Greatness want to take your hand and lead you through a Winter Wonderland. And with that in mind we present the 2021 classic A Christmas to Savour starring Britt Irvins fringe and a sans glasses Zach Roerig. Its a classic Christmas story, like Scrooge but instead of being a mean spirited old grouch, Scarlett is an annoying chef lady who says things like "more Basil" and "Ribeye? hmmm".

You'll hear all about maple syrup reunions, meringue horror, acorn abuse and meet a lovely man named after a hat.

Instagram @hallmarkofgreatness

Last Orders: The Final Alliance

Thu, 25 May 2023 00:30:00 +0100

We joined this week by lovely Tom to ponder the question If you were a bad-ass renegade out for revenge, what would your animal companion of choice be? In this weeks episode, the 1990 classic The Final Alliance we find out the David Hasselhoffs would be a cougar, that does nothing!

We also find out about the worst karate ever, so much about motorbike gangs, how to confuse a ferret and The Hoffs Hand Shandy.

You can find Tom playing guitar/being awesome over at Spillage on instagram so go do that yeah?

Instagram @hallmarkofgreatness

Love Afloat

Thu, 18 May 2023 00:15:00 +0100

After another brief break we are back with the stone cold 2022 classic Love Afloat. Yeah, me neither. Its the age old tale of a woman, a man, a boat and a big pan of fish.

Honestly I have no idea, I watched it three times and fell asleep each time so some of the review may not 100% accurate.

We will try and do better I promise

Last Orders: Space Truckers

Thu, 20 Apr 2023 02:00:00 +0100

Hold on to your CB radio and neck that bottle of bennies as we smash headlong into the 1996 classic "Space Truckers" starring Dennis Hopper, Norm (again) and Poochie in a tale that is as insane as it is powerful.

You will learn all about how you can take short cuts in space, hotdog etiquette, robot dongs, the sad death of Quedge, geometric porcines and the many many deaths of Charles Dance!

Instagram @hallmarkofgreatness

A Slice of Chicago Romance

Thu, 13 Apr 2023 00:30:00 +0100

A two man booth this week takes you through the 2022 classic A Slice of Chicago Romance, which is supposed to be like Romeo and Juliet but if Shakespeare was kicked in the head by a horse that was also simple.

You will hear about the worst kind of pizza ever, balloon hilarity, the return of Tony Meatballs and more unlocked memories from the Higgens archive.

Instagram @hallmarkofgreatness

Last Orders - 1990: Bronx Warriors

Thu, 06 Apr 2023 02:00:00 +0100

A hot steaming slice of Italian exploitation for you this week in the form of 1982's 1990: Bronx Warriors, a film so insane no man can fathom what the hell is happening.

You'll hear all about the worst gang to be in, the peril of holes, how to spot a peg leg at a distance, why you should never canoodle in a stairwell and we ask the question "how much force does it take to push wood into a man?"

Instagram @hallmarkofgreatness

Last Orders: Dreamscape

Thu, 23 Mar 2023 00:30:00 +0100

The Power Triangle is back as we take you through the 1984 classic Dreamscape starring Dennis Quaid, Captain Von Trapp and Cory 'Bumper' Yothers in a movie about dream manipulation, sexy trains and the obligatory dirt bike chase.

You'll also find out about Joes dream job, the worst dream ever, a delicious sandwich, some hot sax action and the perils of horse racing celtic folk punk bands.

Instagram @hallmarkofgreatness

Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Love, Bubbles, and Crystal Cove

Thu, 16 Mar 2023 00:30:00 +0100

This week we are joined by John from Dammit Vince to take you through the 2021 classic Love, Bubbles, and Crystal Cove.

Its about bath bombs, bad dads and bartering. You will learn all about how Joe washes his hair, Johns willingness to explode all bathtubs, how much smell is too much smell, the only occupations that require waistcoats and Bernis inability to tell the difference between any film ever!

Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Last Orders: The Sword & The Sorcerer (Ft Monorants)

Thu, 23 Feb 2023 01:45:00 +0100

With Mark on his holidays we decided to comb the internet for the very best guests to come on and give us their take on the 1982 classic The Sword and The Sorcerer and luckily Mono and Ciara from Monrants: The Boys and that were available to do just that.

You will hear all about THE ONE LAND, oily buttock massages, the murder of Grampa Joe, Bucketheaded Wendy and the Snakey Face, why you should have strong recruitment process for your castle and the invention of the Bunkbed Brothel!

Go listen to Monorants and follow them @RantsMono on twitter and anywhere you get your podcasts from, they're top top people.

Love Map

Thu, 16 Feb 2023 01:45:00 +0100

In another shake up, we are joined by James to discuss the 2021 dating app classic Love Map. It's the classic story of an app inventing woman who must go to Florida to write about romantic outcroppings or something.

You will hear all about upskirt perversions, aggressive sandwich vendors, Handsome Ian & The Murder Quarry, pie you shouldn't eat, zen gardens and top tips to weatherproof your pagoda!

Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Last Orders: Blackbird

Wed, 08 Feb 2023 05:00:00 +0100

"Frankly my dear, I don't riverdance"

This week we take you through the rip roaring excitement of Michael Flatley smash hit Blackbird. Imagine if you can, James Bond crossed with Michael Scarn and then a big dollop of Death in Paradise.

You will hear all about Flatleys hat obsession, the perils of nets, having ravioli for supper, BOAT CRIMES, secret fights and how much Mack the Knife is too much?

Last Orders: Global Meltdown

Thu, 02 Feb 2023 00:30:00 +0100

This week we lead you through the lava strewn streets of the 2017 made for TV classic Global Meltdown starring non union Pierce Bronhomme and an annoying child in a disaster film that is literally a disaster.

You'll hear all about the Arrow Boyz, the protective power of cushions, too many Only Fools & Horses jokes, what not to store in barrels and Mark has a breakdown over this film and strange YouTube adverts.

Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Last Orders: Fatal Deviation

Sat, 28 Jan 2023 00:30:00 +0100

This episode was previously released in 2021 but due to ghost or whatever it was deleted from the server.

This week Joe, Berni and James take you through the best film ever made, Irelands only Kung-Fu movie 1998's Fatal Deviation starring/written/produced/catering by James "Jimmy" Bennett. We find out how Irish locksmiths work, the perils of working in Londis and establish that one of Boyzone is an art thief.

Also James sings a song for you.

Our Dream Wedding

Wed, 25 Jan 2023 00:15:00 +0100

For some reason we are still doing time travel and this week we present to you the 2021 classic Our Dream Wedding starring Rachel Hendrix and a man made of wet cardboard.

Listen to hear all about Lancashire uncles, the benefits of tripe, the legality of kicking children and why this would be 100% better with Dean Stockwell in it.

Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Last Orders: School Dance

Thu, 19 Jan 2023 00:15:00 +0100

Its a brand new year and we are back with the same old nonsense. This week we take you though Pete Davidsons first ever movie, the 2014 classic School Dance with that little lad out of Role Models as well.

You will hear all about rapping grannies, powerful grape juice, naked cowboys and the fact that Pedro from Napoleon Dynamite is in this for some reason. It real bad!

Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Meet Cute

Wed, 11 Jan 2023 04:15:00 +0100

We are back with a bang after the festive break with an in depth review of the 2022 classic Meet Cute starring Kaley Cuoco and Peter Davidson (not that one) in a story of time travel, love and Indian food.

Listen to fin out about what childhood tastes like, fun old man music jokes and the ethical dilemma of doing a sex with yourself in the past.

Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

The Big Daft Hallmark of Greatness Quiz of the Year

Wed, 21 Dec 2022 02:30:00 +0100

The festive season is truly upon on and in a kind of multiverse way that the kids like nowadays we have allowed the HoG regular hosts to meet with the grotty below stairs Last Orders boyz for a battle of wits, cunning and memory. It goes about as well as you'd expect. But its a good bit of fun and if you have listened to all the episodes you should be able to beat us. Its not that difficult because we are rubbish as it turns out.

HAPPY CHRISTMAS!

As always at this time of year we like to look out for others less fortunate then ourselves and as always our designated charity is Manchesters Wood Street Mission. We know times are hard for everyone but anything you can spare will make some kids Christmas just a little better.

https://www.woodstreetmission.org.uk/

As we also mentioned in this episode if you feel like you need someone to speak to over Christmas here are some numbers for UK Helplines. There is no shame in it, we all need help from time to time yeah?

Samaritans Open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year

Call: 116 123

Papyrus

Hopeline UK for children and young people under the age of 35 who are experiencing thoughts of suicide and anyone concerned that a young person could be thinking about suicide.

Call: 0800 068 4141

Calm Open 5pm – Midnight every day

Call: 0800 58 58 58

Shout Crisis Text Service

A free confidential number you can text any time – day or night. Text SHOUT to 85258 to get text support

Switchboard – LGBT+ Helpline

Call: 0300 330 0630

Open 10:00 – 22:00 every day

Visit: switchboard.lgbt

Last Orders: The Aftermath

Thu, 15 Dec 2022 00:30:00 +0100

The Last Orders boys have grown weary of Christmas joy and have decided to revert to what we know best, Steve Barkett films. More specifically the 1982 classic "The Aftermath"

The heroic tale of one astronauts quest to defeat mutants and bad boys with only Dave Matthews and a child John Denver for help. Yeah, that is what happens.

You'll hear all about the best way to run away from things (in a circle), the sad death of Coconut Joe and his family, hot Penal Code Action, big hand disease and incorrect frying pan use for beginners!

https://www.woodstreetmission.org.uk/

Samaritans Open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year

Call: 116 123

Papyrus

Hopeline UK for children and young people under the age of 35 who are experiencing thoughts of suicide and anyone concerned that a young person could be thinking about suicide.

Call: 0800 068 4141

Calm Open 5pm – Midnight every day

Call: 0800 58 58 58

Shout Crisis Text Service

A free confidential number you can text any time – day or night. Text SHOUT to 85258 to get text support

Switchboard – LGBT+ Helpline

Call: 0300 330 0630

Open 10:00 – 22:00 every day

Visit: switchboard.lgbt

Christmas with You

Thu, 08 Dec 2022 00:15:00 +0100

The special day grows closer and to prepare for the return of our lord Santa we humbly present 2022's Christmas with You starring Aimee Garcia and your boy Freddie Prinze Jr in a suprisingly fun Netflix romp.

You'll hear about our lettuce themed restaurant, which google appliance is trying to murder us, the joys of yellow soup and how stinky do trousers have to get before its a problem.

https://www.woodstreetmission.org.uk/

Samaritans Open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year

Call: 116 123

Papyrus

Hopeline UK for children and young people under the age of 35 who are experiencing thoughts of suicide and anyone concerned that a young person could be thinking about suicide.

Call: 0800 068 4141

Calm Open 5pm – Midnight every day

Call: 0800 58 58 58

Shout Crisis Text Service

A free confidential number you can text any time – day or night. Text SHOUT to 85258 to get text support

Switchboard – LGBT+ Helpline

Call: 0300 330 0630

Open 10:00 – 22:00 every day

Visit: switchboard.lgbt

Secret Past

Thu, 01 Dec 2022 00:00:00 +0100

Something different this week as we take you the the 2014 classic "Secret Past" aka A Christmas mystery starring Esme Bianco and Ryan Bittle as a journalist and a man who must work together to find out who has been sending cards to a dead mum. Its as dumb as that. Also John Ratzenberger is sort of in it.

You'll find out about early digital cameras, how not to make coffee, the dark world of Bennys Basement.com and how Sherlock could spot a pervert at 20 paces.

https://www.woodstreetmission.org.uk/

Merry Kissmas

Thu, 24 Nov 2022 00:15:00 +0100

We are ploughing through Christmas season now and this weeks episode, the stone cold 2015 classic "Merry Kissmas" only makes it better.

Starring Karissa Lee Staples and Brant Daugherty as a woman and a man who fall in love due to the mystical powers of an elevator. You will learn all about nutcrackers, our own preferred recipes for dog biscuits, why Raymond Romanos mother is on the register and what ballet actually is!

https://www.woodstreetmission.org.uk/

Last Orders: Q: The Winged Serpent

Wed, 16 Nov 2022 21:30:00 +0100

Wow. This is a doozy.

Come with us as we discover what makes the best omelette, how to be a successful RoofCop and less David Caradine wanking jokes then you’d expect.

Christmas Collision

Wed, 09 Nov 2022 00:00:00 +0100

Not even sickness could keep us from you, we are here to talk all about the 2021 classic Christmas Collision starring Sebrina Scott and John Wells as two people who are almost certainly in this movie. A story of dead mothers, Australian dads and one towns love for cookies at all costs.

You will learn about long hidden family recipes, creepy jogging boys and more puns about hot pies then you will ever need to hear!

https://www.woodstreetmission.org.uk/

Last Orders; Monster mash:The movie

Sun, 30 Oct 2022 23:58:28 +0100

What in the hell is this! a film based around that guy what done the song ages ago. its as shite as you had hoped and as entertaining as watching 8 hens fight.

Happy Halloween

Christmas Under Wraps

Thu, 13 Oct 2022 04:00:00 +0100

Its that time of year again where everyone else is doing super spoopy stuff but we have bucked the trend and decided to start Christmas Early. Thats right pilgrim, for the next few months its going to be nothing but red and green sweaters, hot chocolate and gingerbread houses!

Leading us into this season of goodwill is 2014's Christmas Under Wraps starring that lass out of Full House and the guy who ran the arcade in Waynes World.

You will learn all about placenta eating, Alaskan murder dates, the importance of a spotless spatula and can someone tell us what 0% Milk is?

https://www.woodstreetmission.org.uk/

Last Orders: Endgame

Thu, 06 Oct 2022 04:00:00 +0100

This week we take you throguh the delightful romp that is the classic 1983 movie Endgame starring Non-Union Chris Rea, Non-Union Christopher Lambert and a man made up of the DNA of all 3 Stooges.

You will learn all about the rules of Endgame, a game of count the dirtbike, the rise of facist Mr Feeny and why you should never allow yourself to be sealed in a big block of concrete.

Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Cooking up Love

Thu, 29 Sep 2022 04:00:00 +0100

It's our 100th episode so what better way to celebrate it then with a film about BBQ sauce, food trucks and 1 park bench. We are of course talking about the 2021 smash hit Cooking up Love (or The Sauce of Love as you might know it) starring Rachel Bles and Stephen Huszar (HUZZAH) as some sort of food truck rival contest judge thing.

You will learn all about the best team chants, the mystery of the little fat boy, our new favourite reviewer Brenda and just a lot of giggling at the end. Not that thats a bad thing.

Heres to the next 100!

Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Last Orders: Terror on Tour

Thu, 22 Sep 2022 04:00:00 +0100

Roll up Roll up and come and see The Clowns!

No, not the ones that startled you at a circus as a child giving you lifelong coulrophobia but the less then famous band and stars of the 1980 classic "Terror on Tour" which is a complete lie as they're not on tour anyway.

You'll find out all about the Secret Room of Blood, whatever happened to The Names (not them ones), the best way to order a pizza and will we ever find out any of the characters names? Probably not

This film was suggested to us by the always fragrant Mr Pat Veil (@PatVeil on twitter).

He's a very cool music man https://patveil.bandcamp.com/ so go and give that a listen yeah?

Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

I Married Who?

Wed, 07 Sep 2022 22:28:52 +0100

Welcome to the simple tale of a woman, a boring woman about to be married who goes for a wild night in Vegas and ends up marrying a sort of famous man. It is of course the 2012 classic "I Married Who?" starring Kellie Martin and Ethan Erickson.

You will learn all about how marriage anulment doesnt work, why you cant get married drunk in vegas, things to watch out for in men and the introduction of new character Jimmy Potatoes.

Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Last Orders: Roadie

Wed, 31 Aug 2022 09:30:00 +0100

Climb aboard the Rock 'n' Roll Express this week stopping at Meatloaf Junction, Kaki Parkway and Country and Western Boulevard where this service terminates. We are talking of course about the 1980s classic "Roadie" about a man who becomes a roadie, meets Roy Orbison and gives a child to Alice Cooper. Its really weird is what we are saying.

You will learn about Meatloaf and his tiny feet, robotic wheelchairs, 24 Kama Sutra action and why this isn't The Blues Brothers

Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Sweet Autumn

Thu, 25 Aug 2022 04:15:00 +0100

Summer is now supposedly over and so we want to get right into the autumn/fall feels with this slice of leafy pie. That is 2020's Sweet Autumn starring Nikki "Peaches" Deloach and Andrew Walker in a simple tale of death, candy and pumpkins.

You will learn all about how much maple syrup is worth, the best way to lurk at a campsite, the joys of capitalism and why you shouldnt let chocolate tell you how to live your life.

Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Last Orders: Nightmare Circus

Thu, 18 Aug 2022 04:00:00 +0100

Before we start can I just say sorry, this is a bad film with bad things.

This week we take you through the 1973/4 movie "Nightmare Circus" or Terror Circus or Caged Women 2 or like a billion other names it went under. Its stinky. Really really stinky. But we watch these things so you dont have to.

You will hear all about the Nolan Sisters, what actually constitutes a circus, the best breakfast ever and some history of old actors.

Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Walking the Dog

Thu, 11 Aug 2022 04:00:00 +0100

We are back, back again with an in depth look at 2017's "Walking the Dog" a film described by some people as existing.

Revel in the in depth plot line about a bike path!

Gasp at the mysterious elderly gentleman suitor!

Be afraid as 90 minutes passes with NOTHING HAPPENING!

You'll also learn about suspicious mother/daughter relationships, how to run a business out of literally anywhere and why bicycles are for grown ups only.

Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Birthday Holiday

Thu, 04 Aug 2022 04:00:00 +0100

No new episode this week as Joe is on holiday as its his birthday, 25 again! But he wanted to leave you a little message of thanks and ask for your help in some issues close to his heart.

If you can donate to any of these charities please do but understand you are under no obligation to by any stretch of the imagination ok. Your continued listenership is enough

The UK Sepsis Trust

The Trussell Trust

The Campaign Against Living Miserably

Many thanks and we will see you next week with the usual avalanche of wet nonsense.

Undercover Bridesmaid

Thu, 28 Jul 2022 04:00:00 +0100

It's a hot hot day here at Hallmark of Greatness so why not open a cold beverage and listen as we review the 2012 classic Undercover Bridesmaid starring Brooke Burns and Justin Baldoni. Its basically Miss Congeniality but without Michael Caine.

You can learn all about karate kicks, exploding cakes, the worst bridal shower in existence and the real life Bang Bang Bart!

Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Last Orders: Eliminators

Thu, 21 Jul 2022 04:00:00 +0100

Strap on your Mobile Units, check your S.P.O.T. and let us take you through the 1986 classic "Eliminators" as voted for by you, yes you. It stars Tasha Yar off of Star Trek TNG and some other people. Its a tale as old as time, a dead pilot is brought back as so Mandroid to travel through time to steal Roman shields for a bad guy. You know, the usual.

You will learn all about the latin for egg, the perils of boat explosions, how fire can shoot bullets at you, powder paints and most importantly NINJA SKILLS.

Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Unleashing Mr. Darcy

Thu, 14 Jul 2022 04:00:00 +0100

Prepare dear listener for tale as old as time as we take you through 2015's Unleashing Mr. Darcy starring Cindy Busby and Ryan Paevey in a somewhat bizarre retelling of Jane Austens " Pride and Prejudice" but with more tiny dogs.

You will hear all about party etiquette, why nobody knows what lacrosse is, why dog shows are for idiots and why eveyones mother always run a bridal shop in these films.

Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Last Orders: Ninja Strike Force

Thu, 07 Jul 2022 04:00:00 +0100

This weeks film of choice is the 1988 Godfrey Ho classic "NInja Strike Force" or more accurately "Three Very Different Films Cut Together: The Movie". For what he have here is a story about a young man trying to make his way in the world against a system that holds him down, a film about a bike factory/race and some ninjas fighting in the park.

You will learn all about church roof swords, terrible Australian accents, replaceable female leads, the second sexiest car wash ever and the perils of olde time diseases.

Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Anything for Love

Thu, 30 Jun 2022 04:00:00 +0100

With all the nonsense of Half-mas out of the way we return once more to the serene waters of regular Hallmark movies starting with 2016's Anything for Love starring Erika Christensen and Paul Greene.

You will learn about farty shoulders, wet meat food, the Crimes of Brandon, why women love their top half and why being a male nurse is apparently the worst thing in the world. Seriously they go on like hes Shipman or something.

Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Last Order: Dungeons & Dragons

Thu, 23 Jun 2022 04:15:00 +0100

Joined by the ever lovely Planty we are also joined this week by the indomitable That Fking Guy to review 2000's "masterpiece" Dungeons & Dragons with Jermeys Iron and Little Jimmy Olson.

I dont really know what to say about this, plagued by technical issues and the fact the film is borderline unwatchable this is not the best epsidoe ever despite having one of the best line ups. So I understand if you want to skip it.

But you should check out Deans stuff @thatfkingguy or the website Totalcultzone.com

Hes a really good guy

A Dickens of a Holiday!

Tue, 21 Jun 2022 04:00:00 +0100

Rounding out Half-mas is the publicly voted for 2021's A Dickens of a Holiday! Yes, with an exclamation point, like that town Westward Ho!

Stupid.

You will learn all about sexy phone voices, terrible action sequences, nostalgia pies and how to be the best Scrooge you can be.

Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Snowmance

Thu, 16 Jun 2022 04:00:00 +0100

Half-mas is in full effect as we present 2017's Snowmance for your approval.

Reccomended to us by Abbie Stabby (check out her art and twitch and all that) we offer you a humble story of a mad lass who wants to do deep kissing on a snowman.

Be prepared for fish jokes, sad snow angels, lady Dwight Schrute, snow nipples, sweeping zombies and Dean Popadopolis

Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Abby Stabby Links

https://www.instagram.com/abbiestabby

https://www.twitch.tv/abbiestabbyart

Last Orders: Empire of the Dark

Thu, 09 Jun 2022 04:00:00 +0100

In a change from the usual Half-mas nonsense we offer you 2019's Empire of the Dark that is part Neil Breen, part Fatal Deviation and all Zap Rowsdower!

You will learn about lanky Jawas, the importance of necks, sweaty King Arthur, explosive bread rolls, the correct way to bless things and a car that fires bridges at you!

Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

A Very Nutty Christmas

Tue, 07 Jun 2022 04:00:00 +0100

Its Half-mas so you get a half episode! 2018's A Very Nutty Christmas starring Melissa Joan Hart, Barry Watson and not Kathy Najimy.

You can hear all about biscuits named after family, why climbing a christmas tree is sometimes the answer and what Katies superhero power and name would be.

Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Meet the Santas

Thu, 02 Jun 2022 03:30:00 +0100

Its Half-Christmas so we're leading you by the hand through the 2005 "classic" Meet the Santas with Steven Guttenberg out of Police Acadamy and Armin Shimerman what was in Star Trek DS9.

You will hear a lot of bad santa laughs, resuable hairstyles, the rules of teleportation and why santa can't marry his mum apparantly.

Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Last Orders: Dinosaur Island

Thu, 26 May 2022 04:00:00 +0100

This week we let you vote for what we would watch and you picked 1995's Dinosaur Island and we couldnt hate you more for picking it.

You'll find out all about low quality puppets, The Sacred Rite of Oom-Pah-Pah, the correct amount of bosoms a lady should have (apparently) and why this island only has one horse but an infinite supply of young women.

Follow us on Twitter @hallmarkofgreat or follow Mark @100thingspodInstagram @hallmarkofgreatnessEmail hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Campfire Kiss

Wed, 18 May 2022 21:23:02 +0100

We're here to take you on a country hike to the 2017 classic Campfire Kiss starring Danica McKellar and Paul Greene. With Dana as a sort of uptight maths teacher and Steve as a jerky boss of the jerk store will they find love while up a mountain or something. I dunno. They don't eat each other like in Alive anyway.You'll learn how to tell the difference between a horse and water feature, why just eating pork is bad for your tummy, the dangers of slight inclines and why kids love to watch grown ups do a deep kiss on each other.

Last Orders: Alienator

Wed, 11 May 2022 21:28:44 +0100

Strap on your space suits as we lead you down the forest path that is 1990's Alienator starring Jan-Michael Vincent and the fabulous Teagan Clive. Joined by Planty once again, You will learn all about American Last of the Summer Wine remakes, DCI Burnside off of The Bill, ornamental land mines, the power of nets and Mr Kiplings exceedingly good bras.

Instagram @hallmarkofgreatnessEmail hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Love's Second Chance

Wed, 04 May 2022 14:38:57 +0100

All new line-up, same old nonsense. This week its 2020's Love's Second Chance starring Gabrielle Christian and Cody Ray Thompson. What should have been a sure fire hit in terms of Hallmark movies what we actually got was a film so slow, glaciers get angry and tell it to speed up.You'll learn all about Little Charlie Chino, the perils of tandem bikes and the introduction of THE WANG CLANG!

As mentioned in the episode, we are currently raising money for a friend of Joes who has brain cancer. If you can donate, please consider it https://www.gofundme.com/f/simon-w-barlow-smyth

Last Orders: Interzone

Wed, 27 Apr 2022 08:01:14 +0100

This week James and Joe are joined by Mark from 100 Things we learned from Film to take you through the 1987 Italian classic Interzone starring ladies favourite Bruce Abbott, Beatrice Ring and Joes current obsession Teagan Clive.You will learn all about Electric Priests, Rhythmic Steven & his Gyrating Fiddle Band, the sexiest foods to eat (for sex) and what happened to Rene off of 'Allo 'Allo after the money dried up.

Instagram @hallmarkofgreatnessEmail hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Bridal Wave

Wed, 20 Apr 2022 13:05:01 +0100

This week, Joe and new permanent main show resident Berni are joined by Katie fresh off her debut in The Demolitionist as we tackle 2015's Bridal Wave starring Arielle Kebbel and Andrew W. Walker as a mismatched bride and a feckless architect. You will learn all about Murder Grottos, old lady Helmet Hair and we still don't fully know what PuPu is.

Last Orders: The Demolitionist

Mon, 21 Mar 2022 22:22:54 +0100

We’re joined by a special friend of the podcast this week as we go through 1995's The Demolitionist starring Nicole Eggert as a reanimated cop who has to avenge their death. Sound familiar? Yeah we get that too.You will however learn about the worlds most expensive posing pouch, how to wield a BattlePole, why you should be wary of night time window cleaners and play "who wants to kiss these cold dead lips?"

Last Orders: Deadly Cyber Bully

Mon, 14 Mar 2022 15:18:02 +0100

This time we take your through 2020's classic Deadly Cyber Bully (or Murder in the Vineyard).Neither of which happen in the film. There is however an incompetent cop, incredibly old teenagers and very young mothers. Add to that mix, Non Union AC Slater, Jean-Ralphio and Andrew Lincoln and you have a recipe for a mess. You can learn all about a boy dressed as grapes, Joes cat adventure and how big a hectre is.And our new favourite guest reviewer, all hail The Christmas Bumburger

Win, Lose or Love

Mon, 07 Mar 2022 13:23:31 +0100

This week we take you 2015's Win, Lose or Love. It is not affiliated with the daytime gameshow in any way, sadly.You'll learn about the British version of the gameshow, a lot of talk about Heroes and what actually constitutes a victory (hint its not this film)

Last Orders: Chupacabra vs. the Alamo

Mon, 28 Feb 2022 12:36:09 +0100

After an avian related mishap, we are back this week with the 2013 creature feature Chupacabra vs. the Alamo starring that bloke off of CHiPs.You'll learn all about WIlly Blood, James sings you another song, Barny has an emotional breakdown and we find our new favourite character in Little Johnny Punting.

Love on the Sidelines

Mon, 14 Feb 2022 11:31:58 +0100

In honour of the Super Bowl, we take a peek at 2016's Love on the Sidelines starring Emily Kinney and John Reardon.You'll hear all about knock off goods, how cheques work, the secret history of Budge and a fun game of "Is this a real person"

Our Podcast of Greatness is the delightful and fragrant That FKing Show, get it listened to @ http://totalcultzone.com/

Last Orders: OCTOPUS

Mon, 07 Feb 2022 15:04:45 +0100

We are joined by this week by Mark off of 100 Things We Learned From Film and like a million other podcasts. We take you through the 2000 film OCTOPUS or octopus. You'll learn how little we know about submarines, which is an octopuses sexiest leg and why Mark is a menace.

Give them a little follow on @100thingspod and @EverySimpsonPod

Destination Wedding

Mon, 31 Jan 2022 13:29:56 +0100

This week we take you through 2017's made for TV classic Destination Wedding (not the Keanu Reeves one)You'll discover what makes a Mariachi Streetfighter, why killing old people may be justified, and why this is the actual worst film we have ever done. Including Breaking Legs.

Last Orders: "2025: The World Enslaved by a Virus"

Mon, 24 Jan 2022 13:33:46 +0100

We are back with possibly the worst film we have ever done, the Jesus bothering conspiracy theory riddled "2025: The World Enslaved by a Virus"You will hear so much about fish and their locating skills, low energy car chases, learn how to make cereal soup and how many gherkins it takes to make an accurate facsimile of Jesus amongst many other things.

Do not watch this film under any circumstance

All of My Heart

Mon, 17 Jan 2022 13:07:56 +0100

We are back! Dive headlong into the Chabertniverse with All of My Heart! See how Lacey Chabert does making croissants, selling them and having a paint fight with Non Union Nathan Fillion. Oh and Ed Asner is there talking about ducks for some reason or other.

Noelle

Thu, 23 Dec 2021 22:00:00 +0100

They said it couldn't be done, nobody in their right mind would do a Hallmark-ish film a day and they would be right. This was a right royal mess from the start, then got a bit better and then plunged into the stinky mud and never fully recovered. Anyway this is that Disney Noelle film, it's alright.

Every day leading up to Christmas were giving you a new episode to try and help raise money for our chosen charity Wood Street Mission. They provide toys for kids in our city that otherwise wouldn't get anything. So get that warm feeling in your tummy tum by donating a couple of quid yeah? https://cafdonate.cafonline.org/8208#!/DonationDetails%23/ContactDetails

The Princess Switch

Wed, 22 Dec 2021 22:00:00 +0100

So close we can taste it! 23 brings us The Princess Switch with DOUBLE HUDGE! which is a good thing. More Hudge for your budge. or something. just make its stop please

Christmas Land

Tue, 21 Dec 2021 22:00:00 +0100

Another day, another one of these things. Why are we doing this again? This one is about a woman who inherits some trees or something. It doesn't matter any more. There is only screaming

Santa with Muscles

Mon, 20 Dec 2021 23:00:00 +0100

Another Last Orders bonus, and we are joined by the handsome chaps from Dammit Vince to discuss 1996's Santa with Muscles starring Hulk "The Hulk" Hogan. This is legitimately a glorious mess of a movie and has to be seen to be believed.

A Very Merry Mix-Up

Mon, 20 Dec 2021 22:00:00 +0100

On the home stretch and day 21 gives us A Very Merry Mix-Up, which is like an instructional guide on how to get murdered or join a cult at sort of Christmas.

The Christmas Chronicles

Sun, 19 Dec 2021 22:00:00 +0100

His and Her Christmas

Sat, 18 Dec 2021 22:00:00 +0100

A Very Merry Toy Store

Fri, 17 Dec 2021 22:00:00 +0100

I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus

Thu, 16 Dec 2021 22:00:00 +0100

Jingle Jangle: A Christmas Journey

Wed, 15 Dec 2021 22:00:00 +0100

The Knight Before Christmas

Tue, 14 Dec 2021 22:00:00 +0100

Father Christmas Is Back

Mon, 13 Dec 2021 22:00:00 +0100

Christmas Wedding Planner

Sun, 12 Dec 2021 22:00:00 +0100

A Christmas Prince

Sat, 11 Dec 2021 23:00:00 +0100

A Christmas Wish

Fri, 10 Dec 2021 22:00:00 +0100

Christmas with a View

Thu, 09 Dec 2021 22:00:00 +0100

A Perfect Christmas List

Wed, 08 Dec 2021 22:00:00 +0100

Let It Snow

Tue, 07 Dec 2021 22:02:00 +0100

Last Orders: The Santa Incident

Mon, 06 Dec 2021 23:29:49 +0100

Santa Girl

Mon, 06 Dec 2021 22:01:00 +0100

Operation Christmas Drop

Sun, 05 Dec 2021 22:03:00 +0100

The Holly and The Ivy! Day 6 finds us watching 2020's Operation Christmas Drop which is apparently based on a real true story about the U.S. Airforce giving Xmas gifts to the remote islands around Guam. Its a very pretty film and its really fun to say Guam. which is nice.

A California Christmas

Sat, 04 Dec 2021 22:00:00 +0100

Watch out Turkeys! Its Day 5 of our Hallmark Christmas Jamboree and we are bringing you 2020's A California Christmas. A rich man with a plan tries to trick a woman into selling her farm and then wine happens. There are more of these films and WE MUST SEE THEM!

My Dad's Christmas Date

Fri, 03 Dec 2021 22:00:00 +0100

Silent Night! Day 4 exposes us to 2020's My Dad's Christmas Date starring handsy Jeremy Piven as a dad who has a daughter but also a dead wife or something. Who knows? Not us. This was really bad but features Mike Thecoolperson from The Young Ones which made Joe happy

Christmas Inheritance

Thu, 02 Dec 2021 22:00:00 +0100

Christmas Pudding! Peeking behind the flap of day 3 we find 2017's Christmas Inheritance starring Plop from The Office and bizarrely Andie MacDowell singing a song. We quite liked this purely for our theory of the revolving tramp.

A Very Country Christmas

Wed, 01 Dec 2021 22:00:00 +0100

Jingle Bells! Day 2 of our Advent Calendar reveals 2017's A Very Country Christmas. The story of a man who plays a guitar and a woman who doesn't. At Christmas. Also there is a child and a game we dubbed Zombie Go-Karts.

Home Sweet Home Alone

Tue, 30 Nov 2021 22:00:00 +0100

Happy Merry! Day One of the Hallmark of Greatness Christmas Jamboree brings you Home Sweet Home Alone, the not a remake and not a reboot of the original classic Home Alone. Find out why Craig hates this more then Breaking Legs, how easily Anthony can be swayed by an argument and why do this family have so much soda?

A Family Thanksgiving

Mon, 22 Nov 2021 15:04:26 +0100

Come join us as we review the worst film we have ever done 2010's A Family Thanksgiving starring that lass out of Spaceballs and Faye Dunaway for some reason. We hated this for many many reasons but listen to hear all about the best way to throw a child through a window, why hitting is a great parental strategy and why this film hates women on every conceivable level. The rage we felt is unbearable.

Last Orders : The Fantastic Four

Mon, 15 Nov 2021 14:20:33 +0100

This week we take you back through 1994's The Fantastic Four. Yes that one. You'll learn all about Hector von Broom, the legacy of Mr Film, Diamond Urchins, who is Minky Pullups and we answer the hot topic of Ben Grimms genital situation and other important F4 facts you want to know. EXCELSIOR!

Pumpkin Pie Wars

Mon, 08 Nov 2021 15:03:51 +0100

After a brief technical glitch we are back 10% stronger but 8% fatter. This week in honour of the upcoming Thanksgiving celebrations, we review 2016s Pumpkin Pie Wars starring Julie Gonzalo and Rico Aragon.

We learn about classic bakery errors, the fastest way for an old lady to block up a toilet and why solo golf is the saddest game ever.

Last Orders: Yes, Madam

Mon, 25 Oct 2021 12:09:26 +0100

This week we are joined by tremendously talented Randle Parker from the excellent podcast Randle Parkers Film Club to review 1985's Yes, Madam starring Michelle Yeoh and Cynthia Rothrock. You'll learn about Waterstones Perverts, the Asian Mickey Pierce, Gary the SuperCop, moon real estate and why spitting on a matrons chicken is a punishable offence in Hong Kong. You need to watch this movie!

This weeks Podcast of Greatness is the delightful What I Had Heard Was. Go give them a listen and a follow @WhatIHadHeardW1 yeah.

Hint of Love

Mon, 18 Oct 2021 15:16:58 +0100

Come join us as we take a stroll through the 2020 classic Hint of Love with Non Union Chris Pratt again. You'll learn all about the Bolognaise acting dynasty, too many Gordan Ramsey stories and why your future mother shouldn never show you her breasts in return for Pop Tarts. And another patented Anthony Quiz!

This weeks Podcast of Greatness is the delightfully fragrant chaps over at 100 Things We Learned From Film. Give them a listen and a follow @100thingspod

Last Orders - Bloodfist 3:Forced to Fight

Mon, 11 Oct 2021 14:42:49 +0100

Don "The Dragon" Wilson is back in this weeks movie 1992's Bloodfist 3: Forced to Fight, our third visit to the insane and baffling world of Bloodfist. This time Don has to do fights....IN PRISON! I f you can imagine such a thing. Be prepared for real bad racism, cool gang names, wet eggs, Knife Prison and karate based ghosts!

Once again we have no Podcast of Greatness as nobody has sent us their promos. It's free and somebody might hear it.

Blueprint to the Heart

Mon, 04 Oct 2021 13:45:49 +0100

Welcome Traveller, This week we take you through 2020s Blueprint to the Heart. You will learn all about Craig and his weird pronunciation of compilation, American architecture, the Chris De Bergh appreciation society and what's wrong with just being single and yourself?

This weeks Podcast of Greatness is the awesome Not Before Coffee. Give it a listen and a follow @need_3_mugs on the Twitter and that yeah

Last Orders: Titanic 2

Mon, 27 Sep 2021 15:05:53 +0100

Continuing our bizarre nautical themed disaster month we present 2010's Titanic 2 starring the grandson of Dick Van Dyke. You'll learn all about credit card based surgery, sentient electric snakes and why all ships should have emergency thrusters.

There's no Podcast of Greatness this week as we have run out of promos so if you are a cool hip podcat, send them over to us at hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com and we will most certainly play them.

Love Is a Piece of Cake

Mon, 20 Sep 2021 15:11:38 +0100

This week we deliver a lovely slice of 2020's Love is a Piece of Cake starring Lindsey Gort and Greyston Holt. You'll learn why using cake as currency is frowned upon, the importance of a good hoop and plenty of HOT CAKE FACTS.

Our Podcast of Greatness is the sort of sister show to, Weird Thing About That. Give them a follow @WeirdThingPod on the Twitter and that

Last Orders: Titanic The Legend goes On

Mon, 13 Sep 2021 21:16:35 +0100

We finally did it, we found the worst film we have ever reviewed! 2000's Titanic: The Legend Goes On and boy is this a stinker. We learn all about cartoon boobies, what constitutes a captains reception, James does a rap and we have to find a new scoring system as its that bad.

Our podcast of the week is the amazing Playlist Wars, give them a listen and a follow @PlaylistWars on the Twitter and that

Pitching for Love

Mon, 06 Sep 2021 14:56:12 +0100

After our summer holiday we are back! Fatter, sweatier and more tired then ever before.

This week we take you through 2021's Pitching for Love (or 2018's Bramptons Own if you want to be exact). We take you through sexy dentists, ice cream mistresses, givers and takers in baseball and Anthony has done a fun quiz for us.

This weeks Podcast of Greatness is the delicious Randle Parker’s Film Club. Give him a listen and a follow @RandleParker1 on the Twitter and that

Last Orders: Never Too Young to Die

Mon, 26 Jul 2021 12:45:57 +0100

This week Joe, Berni and James take you through the incredibly twisted world of 1986 John Stamos vehicle Never Too Young to Die co-starring THAT Gene Simmons. Find out all about Finnish swearing, health and safety conscious road warriors and our delightful rendition of the best theme song in the world.

Our Podcast of the Week is the cool cats over at The Podcast that Wouldn't Die (find them on twitter @TPodcastTWDie Get them up your Earballs

Follow us on Twitter @hallmarkofgreat Instagram & Facebook @hallmarkofgreatness Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com Join us Fridays on Twitch https://www.twitch.tv/hallmarkofgreat

After the Ball

Mon, 19 Jul 2021 13:06:35 +0100

This week Anthony, Craig and Joe take you through 2015's After the Ball starring Portia Doubleday and Chris Noth in a modern day Cinderella story. You'll learn all about Turkish Delight, English shoe stores and the prerequisites for a reverse Doubtfire.

This weeks Podcast of Greatness is The Beer'd Al Podcast. Go absorb their sounds and follow them @BeerdAlPodcast Get it up your earballs!

Follow us on Twitter @hallmarkofgreat Instagram & Facebook @hallmarkofgreatness Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com Join us Fridays on Twitch https://www.twitch.tv/hallmarkofgreat

Last Orders: Bloodfist 2

Mon, 12 Jul 2021 21:57:05 +0100

If you like kicking then have we got a film for you! This week Joe, Berni and James take you through Don "The Dragon" Wilsons seminal masterpiece Bloodfist 2. You'll learn all about the most dangerous park ranger in the world, James and His Muscle Men and just how many cattle prods you can buy with the budget of this movie (its more then you think).

Our Podcast of the Week is the fun boys over at Neat Cast (@NeatCastPod on the twitter) Get them up your Earballs

Follow us on Twitter @hallmarkofgreat Instagram & Facebook @hallmarkofgreatness Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com Join us Fridays on Twitch https://www.twitch.tv/hallmarkofgreat

Non Transferable

Mon, 05 Jul 2021 15:37:41 +0100

Once again Anthony, Craig and Joe take you through another straight to video delight and this time its 2017's Non Transferable starring Ashley Clements and Brendan Bradley who also wrote and did a direct of it too! You'll learn about Turkish sunsets, how much Josh is too much Josh and how to avoid the lecherous grasp of a salty sea captain.

Our podcast recommend of the week is Sweet Chinwag Podcast. Go listen and follow them @SweetChinwag Get it up your earballs!

Follow us on Twitter @hallmarkofgreat Instagram & Facebook @hallmarkofgreatness Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com Join us Fridays on Twitch https://www.twitch.tv/hallmarkofgreat

A Cookie Cutter Christmas

Wed, 30 Jun 2021 15:10:07 +0100

This week Anthony, Craig and Joe take you through 2014's A Cookie Cutter Christmas starring Erin Krakow and Miranda Frigon. You'll hear all about why children singing is awful, why adults singing is awful and the humungous amount of food eating noise that this film is predominantly made up of.

Our podcast recommend of the week is Playlist Wars. Go listen and follow them @PlaylistWars Get it up your earballs!

Follow us on Twitter @hallmarkofgreat Instagram @hallmarkofgreatness Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com We are also on Facebook now too! @hallmarkofgreatness

Love at the Christmas Table

Mon, 21 Jun 2021 13:45:10 +0100

This week Ant, Craig and Joe take you through the wintery wonderland of 2016's classic "Love at the Christmas Table" starring Marty McFlys Mum, Winnie off of The Wonder Years, Ted out of Schitts Creek and Luke from Gilmore Girls. Yes its an all star cast in what is arguably our favourite film to date. You'll discover the stupidity of indoor snowball fights, impromptu dance sequences and why you should never show a boy your tractor!

Our podcast recommend of the week is Madison on the Air. Go listen and follow them @MadisonontheAir Get it up your earballs!

Follow us on Twitter @hallmarkofgreat Instagram @hallmarkofgreatness Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com We are also on Facebook now too! @hallmarkofgreatness

Last Orders: The Ritual

Thu, 17 Jun 2021 23:20:46 +0100

In this bonus episode Joe, Berni and James take you through the 2000 classic "The Ritual" the follow up feature of director Simon Linscheid. We discover clockwork radios are real, how many leeks is too many leeks and our new business idea for a horse based Uber service.

We also give a shout out to our new obsession over at Nothing More Annoying. Go give them a listen and a follow @AnnoyingPodcast Its a real cool time!

Follow us on Twitter @hallmarkofgreat Instagram @hallmarkofgreatness Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com We are also on Facebook now too! @hallmarkofgreatness

Christmas Eve

Mon, 14 Jun 2021 14:16:46 +0100

Happy Half Christmas! This week Ant, Craig and Joe take you through the 2015 classic "Christmas Eve" starring Sir Captain Picard and Napoleon Dynamite. We find out about our imaginary sequel to Dante's Peak, Joes love for the 90s boyband E-MALE and who or what is Diarrhoea John. This is a real bad film. We also give a shout out to our friends over at Fuck My Work Life. Go give them a listen and a follow @fmwlpod they are very cool!

Follow us on Twitter @hallmarkofgreat Instagram @hallmarkofgreatness Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com We are also on Facebook now too! @hallmarkofgreatness

Recipe for Seduction

Mon, 31 May 2021 12:19:35 +0100

Its a finger lickin' miracle. Anthony, Craig and Joe take you through the amazing 2020 classic Recipe for Seduction starring Mario Lopez as Colonel Sanders in a Lifetime movie. Yes you heard that right. Its as amazing as it sounds. Find out all about correct cutlery for fried chicken, how to murder someone in the poshest way possible and what exactly is "country club ready" Also shout out to @100thingspod on twitter too

Follow us on Twitter @hallmarkofgreat Instagram @hallmarkofgreatness Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com We are also on Facebook now too! @hallmarkofgreatness

Last Orders: Raging Angels

Mon, 24 May 2021 09:33:51 +0100

This week Joe, Berni and James take you through the 1995 classic "Raging Angels" starring Sean Patrick Flanery as some kind of musician/angel summoner. You'll hear all about triangle faced children, how you can avoid demon attacks in your own home and our all new rating system The Golden Fabio!

Follow us on Twitter @hallmarkofgreat Instagram @hallmarkofgreatness Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com We are also on Facebook now too! @hallmarkofgreatness

Love on the Slopes

Mon, 17 May 2021 11:29:01 +0100

This week we take you through the 2018 classic "Love on the Slopes" starring Katrina Bowden and Thomas Beaudoin as a reclusive photographer and a reporter who does the reports we guess. Listen to find out the correct way to eat smores, what constitutes being a hermit and a cheeky visit from Anthonys cousin.

Follow us on Twitter @hallmarkofgreat Instagram @hallmarkofgreatness Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com We are also on Facebook now too! @hallmarkofgreatness

Last Orders: Carnosaur

Mon, 10 May 2021 10:06:37 +0100

In this bonus episode Joe, James and Berni look at 1993's monster classic Carnosaur. We get clarity on baby hands, the correct way to greet and befriend magpies and how many bullets we think it takes to kill a person,

Follow us on Twitter @hallmarkofgreat Instagram @hallmarkofgreatness Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com We are also on Facebook now too! @hallmarkofgreatness

Stranded in Paradise

Mon, 03 May 2021 11:03:22 +0100

This week Ant, Craig and Joe take you through the 2014 classic Stranded in Paradise starring returning Hallmark Heroine Vanessa Marcil (Ep1 The Convenient Groom) Find out what legally defines plagiarism, how much feet is too much feet, the absolute power of HR and the mystical world within a world of Hallmark that we have stumbled across.

Follow us on Twitter @hallmarkofgreat Instagram @hallmarkofgreatness Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com We are also on Facebook now too! @hallmarkofgreatness

Last Orders: Bloodfist!

Thu, 29 Apr 2021 09:09:44 +0100

In this bonus episode new friends James and Berni take us through the 1989 cult classic Bloodfist starring Don "The Dragon" Wilson. We learn about the Tip Top shop, crimes worse then murder and how to tell if your potato is poisoned or powerful.

Follow us on Twitter @hallmarkofgreat Instagram @hallmarkofgreatness Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com We are also on Facebook now too! @hallmarkofgreatness

Breaking Legs

Mon, 26 Apr 2021 13:38:40 +0100

This week Ant, Craig and Joe take you through possibly the worst film we have ever done the 2017 "classic" Breaking Legs starring nobody of any merit. Find out just how to correctly carry a bassoon, what happens when you die and go to tap dance heaven and the worst Halloween Dance Fight in human history. This is truly a "Tarble" movie

Follow us on Twitter @hallmarkofgreat Instagram @hallmarkofgreatness Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com We are also on Facebook now too! @hallmarkofgreatness

Off the Menu

Mon, 19 Apr 2021 12:55:12 +0100

This week Ant, Craig and Joe take you through the 2018 classic "Off the Menu" starring Santino Fontana and Dania Ramirez. Find out all about tethered swimming, how to avoid punches from men with moustaches and the greatest scene in film history: The Sexy Dance of the Cornflake! Follow us on Twitter @hallmarkofgreat Instagram @hallmarkofgreatness Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com We are also on Facebook now too!

For Better or for Worse

Mon, 12 Apr 2021 13:16:09 +0100

This week we take you through the 2014 classic For Better or for Worse and its the latter for sure. Find out what vegans are, the correct way to milk a cow and why a certain farmer has to leave town under cover of darkness. Contains mild swears Follow us on Twitter @hallmarkofgreat Instagram @hallmarkofgreatness Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Eat Play Love

Mon, 05 Apr 2021 14:49:14 +0100

This week Anthony, Craig and Joe take you through the 2017 classic "Eat Play Love" starring Jen Lilley and Jason Cermak as well as the 6 million dollar man and bionic women. We discuss talking dogs, the erotic power of crepes and what a love radar sounds like. Contains light swears Follow us on Twitter @hallmarkofgreat Instagram @hallmarkofgreatness Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

Love on Safari

Mon, 29 Mar 2021 14:05:01 +0100

This week Anthony, Craig and Joe take you through the 2018 classic Love on Safari starring Lacey Chabert and Jon Cor. Highlights include quality hammer action, stealthy pervert giraffes and the teleportation to and from Johannesburg. Stay tuned after the main event for a fun bonus song by Anthony Follow us on Twitter @hallmarkofgreat Instagram @hallmarkofgreatness Email hallmarkofgreatness@gmail.com

After the Storm

Mon, 22 Mar 2021 12:40:53 +0100

Were Back! This week we take you through the 2019 classic After the Storm starring Madeline Leon and Bo Yokely. After a womans house is weirdly damaged in a storm (of the century) can she rebuild it despite her own interference and lack of skills? We will never know. But if you like dogs, barns and the best impression of a man who has fallen out of a wheelchair ever, this is the episode for you.

Home Sweet Home

Mon, 08 Mar 2021 13:52:22 +0100

This week Anthony, Craig and Joe take you through the 2020 classic "Home Sweet Home" starring Natasha Bure and Ben Elliott. We find out what WWJD actually stands for, the correct way to use a hammer and the free labour you can harvest from old people.

Runaway Romance

Mon, 01 Mar 2021 12:32:49 +0100

Back to business as usual this week as Anthony, Craig and Joe take you through the 2018 classic "Runaway Romance" starring Galadriel Stineman and Trevor Donovan. We learn about Amish toilets, the perils of quiche for breakfast and the real possibility of man/bird hybrids!

The Lost Valentine

Mon, 22 Feb 2021 15:44:37 +0100

Join us this week as Anthony, Craig and Joe take you through the 2011 Classic "The Lost Valentine" starring Betty White and Jennifer Love Hewitt. Shock as we actually review a good film, marvel at Mr Meringue and his death squad and beware the room of BIG BALLS!

A Valentine's Match

Mon, 15 Feb 2021 12:27:53 +0100

Link to the movie on Youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j6snmq-wAFc

All Things Valentine

Mon, 01 Feb 2021 14:05:48 +0100

This week Ant, Craig and Joe take you through the 2016 classic All Things Valentine starring Sarah Rafferty and Sam Page. Will they learn to love Valentines, who really loves raspberry scones and is Jeremy Bolognaise a dog murderer? All this and more will be revealed! This marks the start of our weekly Valentines Season so be sure to check back every Tuesday for new episodes.

Over the Moon in Love

Mon, 25 Jan 2021 14:11:50 +0100

youtube link to full movie https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_V-PxlciMm0

The Convenient Groom

Sun, 10 Jan 2021 10:25:06 +0100

This week we discuss the 2016 classic "The Convenient Groom" Will Dr Kate ever find love with the man who broke her crystal hummingbird or will she just "say....No"