Searching Inward

6 Hallmarks of Healthy Relationships

Merry Christmas

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 25 Dec 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Scott Reall, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant wish you a Merry Christmas! To embrace the holiday spirit, the three hosts reflect on their favorite holiday moments and traditions.

“It was like that childhood wonder all over again. It was such a beautiful, unexpected moment of joy where everything was all right and good again.” -Seth [06:00]

“It was so cold that the electricity went out with no heat, so we all slept in the living room, like 15 of us, by the fireplace. And it was really cool.” -Scott [06:50]

“It was such a simple Christmas, but it was just one of the sweetest. And I think it was my all-time favorite.” -Anna [08:54]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:06] Intro

[01:51] One Christmas treat

[04:39] Favorite Christmas memories

[09:24] Outro

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Participant Interview: Derek Pham

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 18 Dec 2024 05:00:00 -0500

E108: Participant Interview: Derek Pham

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant speak with Derek Pham about his experience with Restore Small Groups. Derek shares how the eight week program played an integral part in his mental health journey as he seeked support and a sense of community and home. He also discusses Seth's role in getting him to join a small group.

“Y’all, can I just say, Derek is epically festive in every way, and that’s one of the things that I really love about him. When I think of life and energy and fun, I definitely think of Derek.” -Anna [05:49]

“I never thought I could laugh in my story. I don’t want to get dark or weird but to be crying over some of the heaviest shares and then to also be joking around and laughing, there’s just an authenticity and a gift there that I never thought was possible.” -Derek [09:48]

“That’s the healing part of what happens in a group. You said it so well, Derek. There’s no one trying to fix or even remark in some ways for the most part after what I say. People just simply witness it and listen, and that holding of my pain–that’s simply holding, that’s it–is what is really miraculous even.” -Seth [13:11]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:04] Intro

[01:23] This week’s guest

[03:04] Why he joined Restore Small Groups

[06:13] First night vs last night

[09:03] This is my story

[15:44] The group experience

[19:16] Just show up and see what happens

[22:14] Rapid fire questions

[26:11] Outro

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

6 Hallmarks of Healthy Relationships

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 11 Dec 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Scott Reall, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant talk about the six hallmarks of healthy relationships, based on Dr. Patrick Carnes’ book, “Don't Call It Love.” Healthy relationships are essential for personal and relational growth. The three hosts unpack each hallmark discussed in Dr. Carnes’ book and why they are important for healthy relationships.

“Being pursued shows you have interest. It tells me that you care.” -Seth [04:07]

“And I do think it’s impactful. Like when you’re making eye contact, when you’re listening, when you have your phone put away, and you are zooming in on whoever is speaking or whatever they’re sharing, not to respond, not to give feedback, but to just hold space for, I think it’s a game changer for a lot of people.” -Anna [12:12]

“And a person did choose to leave, and it hurt, but I have this sense of dignity and honor about myself. You know what? I rather be alone in this way than lonely in a dishonest way.” -Scott [37:59]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:46] The six hallmarks

[02:31] Taking initiative deepens the connection

[07:19] Presence is to hold space

[12:36] Completion: follow through with your promise

[18:11] Vulnerability: risky but essential

[25:11] Nurturing: caring for another human being

[28:47] Honesty: a foundation of trust and respect

[39:35] Outro

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Dr. Patrick Carnes’ Book:

Don't Call It Love

Redefining Life after Breast Cancer with Susan Davenport

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 04 Dec 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant speak with Susan Davenport, After Breast Cancer (ABC) Program Director at YMCA of Middle Tennessee. Susan shares her very moving story about asking God to help her invest her suffering from breast cancer to help other survivors find wholeness. She talks about how Scott Reall’s books inspired the curriculum they use in the ABC Program and the impact it provides for a much deeper level of healing.

“I think pain a lot of times also turns people the other direction, so I think this speaks clearly about the softness of your heart and how you allow this to shape you in a beautiful way.” -Seth [07:37]

“And I love to see how the work that we’re doing here at Restore and the work that you’re doing at the Y through ABC, they compliment each other so beautifully.” -Anna [16:08]

“Beautiful, beautiful things happen inside these small groups.” -Susan [26:13]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[00:51] About this week’s guest

[01:38] The strongest person in this gym

[05:43] Investing her suffering into a mission of support

[08:12] About ABC Program

[11:35] The community’s contribution to shared healing

[13:38] Journey to Wholeness and its impact

[19:37] Leading with faith boldly and gently

[22:02] Stories from the small groups

[26:30] Don’t be afraid to feel your feelings

[27:48] Contact Susan and learn more about ABC

[29:15] Outro

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Journey to Freedom: Your Start to a Lifetime of Hope, Health, and Healing

Contact Susan

Website: YMCA of Middle Tennessee

Website: After Breast Cancer Program

Scott Reall’s Books:

Journey to a New Beginning after Loss: Freedom from the Pain of Grief and Disappointment

Journey to Healthy Living: Freedom from Body Image and Food Issues

Journey to a Life of Significance: Freedom from Low Self-Esteem

Happy Thanksgiving

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 27 Nov 2024 05:00:00 -0500

E105: Happy Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving from Restore Small Groups! In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Scott Reall, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant reflect on the holiday by sharing their most meaningful Thanksgiving traditions and what they are most grateful for this year.

“I’ve enjoyed Thanksgiving more at this time in my life really than when I was really little.” -Scott [03:24]

“We’re going away and we are going to just write a new story. Because sometimes holidays are hard and make you more sad than glad, and so we are changing the narrative and doing something new.” -Anna [05:16]

“Also, I’m just grateful for the ways in which I have challenged myself this year and risked things and found new capacities for myself.” -Seth [08:01]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[00:53] Meaningful Thanksgiving traditions

[05:38] Most grateful for this year

[09:06] Outro

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Journey of Freedom: Week 2 "Intrinsic Hope"

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 20 Nov 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Scott Reall, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant discuss the highlights of Week 2 from their flagship program, Journey to Freedom, based on Scott’s book, “Journey to Freedom: Your Start to a Lifetime of Hope, Health, and Healing.” This week centers around the concept of true hope, redefining our understanding of hope and its transformative power that is foundational for change.

“I think hope is the greatest motivation that we feel.” -Scott [01:15]

“To grow is to allow ourselves to be vulnerable and to be limited. And there’s no way we’re going to do that if we have a false understanding of hope.” -Seth [10:29]

“The world needs your unique vision for your life, your unique being to show up fully, because if there was another one of you, one would be irrelevant.” -Anna [16:48]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[00:40] The significance of true hope

[04:07] Examples of true hope

[09:08] Mistaking hope for wishes

[11:36] The story of Michelangelo

[17:11] Vision and hope

[20:08] Real desire for change

[28:28] Struggling to hold on to hope

[31:37] Outro

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Journey to Freedom: Your Start to a Lifetime of Hope, Health, and Healing

Scott Reall’s Books:

Journey to a New Beginning after Loss: Freedom from the Pain of Grief and Disappointment

Journey to Healthy Living: Freedom from Body Image and Food Issues

Journey to a Life of Significance: Freedom from Low Self-Esteem

Participant Interview: Matt Jefferson

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 13 Nov 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant speak with Matt Jefferson about his experience with Restore Small Groups. Even though he has participated in several group and become a facilitator, Matt takes us back to his first group and how it felt liberating and organic to share about himself. He also shares how participating in a small group of functional strangers helped him get into a stronger, more stable place.

“A verbal processor if I ever saw one.” -Anna [10:26]

“I don’t think Group fixes the problems. I think it gives you a chance to figure out what needs focus and attention and how to do it in an appropriate way to make your life more fulfilled.” -Matt [21:55]

“It’s hard to see or access certain parts of yourself without other people.” -Seth [22:24]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:19] About this week’s guest

[04:08] Connecting with Restore Small Groups

[08:00] Recalling that first group

[13:44] In a stronger, more stable place

[18:27] How the group helped his process

[23:34] A secret in plain sight

[28:33] Rapid fire questions

[33:27] Outro

Follow and Contact

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Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Fixed vs Growth Mindset

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 06 Nov 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant talk about the differences between a fixed mindset and a growth mindset and how understanding these ideas can impact your personal growth, your capacity for resilience and influence your overall well being. They draw insights from the founder of these ideas, psychologist Carol Dweck and her groundbreaking research, to discuss how shifting your mindset opens up new possibilities for you life and why they’re so crucial for personal growth.

Follow and Contact

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Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Journey to Freedom: Week 1

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 30 Oct 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Scott Reall, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant start exploring Scott’s book, “Journey to Freedom: Your Start to a Lifetime of Hope, Health, and Healing,” that they used for their flagship eight-week process. Each week, they discuss what you can expect from the eight-week process in a Small Group and what’s at the heart of Journey to Freedom. This week, they start with how to step out of contemplating change of who you want to become and move into real action by taking an honest look at your life.

“Because it doesn’t matter what stage of life we go through or if things are going well, eventually there will be struggles. Or there’s parts of our life that if they got better, we would live better. So Journey to Freedom would really benefit anyone, but what it does, I think, its greatest gift, is it really does move people out of contemplation.” -Scott [06:43]

“I think that’s one of the huge values of the process that we’re offering is we’re creating this space and normalizing, it's ok to say anything that is happening in your interior world and relating it to what’s happening on the outside, right? It’s that process of integration.” -Anna [10:10]

“This is a support group, but it’s also a group process. We’re leading people through the process to a new place as they’re unpacking their story. And we talk about how we focus on a solution versus focusing on a problem.” -Seth [16:17]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:28] The heart of Journey to Freedom

[08:48] The value of the eight-week process

[11:23] The importance of welcome and safety

[15:40] Our foundations for change

[20:27] Emotion is always present

[24:02] Our process of transformation

[29:45] Personal stories of transformation

[37:06] Outro

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Journey to Freedom: Your Start to a Lifetime of Hope, Health, and Healing

Scott Reall’s Books:

Journey to a New Beginning after Loss: Freedom from the Pain of Grief and Disappointment

Journey to Healthy Living: Freedom from Body Image and Food Issues

Journey to a Life of Significance: Freedom from Low Self-Esteem

Celebrating 100 Episodes: A Journey of Growth and Gratitude!

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 23 Oct 2024 07:00:00 -0500

Today, we celebrate a monumental milestone: our hundredth episode of Searching Inward! This achievement reflects the dedication and consistency of our team and the unwavering support of our listeners over the years. Thank you for being part of this journey with us as we look forward to many more episodes to come!

Follow and Contact

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Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Participant Interview: Karen Lopez

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 16 Oct 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Scott Reall, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant speak with Karen Lopez about her journey with Restore Small Groups. Karen shares how joining a small group helped her navigate a transitional point in life with a new job, a new career in a new city.

“I really resonated and what you were saying, I felt emotional listening to you, because it was really beautiful. You said you were committed to being honest, and you absolutely were.” -Seth [14:03]

“You’re articulating so beautifully, I feel like, just the magic and the miracle of what happens in Small Group. There’s obviously a huge shift between when you walk in first night and when you walk out Week Eight.” -Anna [17:23]

“I still think of myself as ill-equipped and underprepared and unable, and at a certain point, if I’m going to make an impact in the places that I am and I want to be in, that doesn’t serve me going forward, like those feelings of doubt and insecurity.” -Karen [20:17]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:05] This week's guest

[05:25] A transitional point in life

[09:46] The experience in a small group

[17:21] Getting past the invisible wall

[22:53] Examples of newfound confidence

[27:33] A communal experience of growth and healing

[30:02] Dealing with pandora’s box

[34:35] Rapid fire questions

[38:37] Outro

Follow and Contact

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Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Topical Episode: “Radical Hospitality”

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 09 Oct 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Scott Reall, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant talk about the concept of radical hospitality, a theme inspired by Henri Nouwen’s book, “Reaching Out.” They discuss how this idea of creating a safe and non-judgemental space plays out in Restore Small Groups’ process.

“The things that are shared within the group are to remain within the group. Things like it is not a place to give and receive advice. It is simply a place to share, which makes it so safe because you know that whatever you put out there is not going to be corrected. It’s not going to be even really commented on in any kind of way, except for like ‘Thank you for sharing that,’ and I can’t tell you the power of how safe that feels.” -Anna [03:58]

“I think that the key to our groups is just always forward thinking. What would be different if you could grow out of this space? And that’s what it really comes down to is growth and the hope that comes from I can grow out of this.” -Scott [24:00]

“Our neurobiology is affected and shaped most by others. Or you could just say, we are hurt in community, and we are healed in community.” -Seth [35:48]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:17] The inspiration of Henri Nouwen

[03:18] Ensuring groups remain a safe & non-judgemental space

[05:24] The power of compassionate presence

[13:52] Personal stories in a group

[19:35] Inviting people to change from within

[24:25] Transforming isolation into meaningful connection

[27:38] The impact of feeling seen

[29:14] Embracing vulnerability and authenticity

[31:57] Radical hospitality is a two-way street

[36:53] The spiritual dimension of radical hospitality

[40:36] Final thoughts

[41:49] Outro

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Resources:

Reaching Out by Henri Nouwen

How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving by David Richo

Spirituality and Mental Health with Dori Gorman

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 02 Oct 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant speak with Dori Gorman, a chaplain for the YMCA in Nashville, about mental health and spirituality. Dori discusses her proactive approach to educate and destigmatize mental health through her role. She also shares her path towards becoming a chaplain and the people who influenced her along the way. Content warnings: Mentions of death and suicide

“As the chaplain ministry has grown, it has been what if we really that clean the inside of the cup first and we provide really intentional, thoughtful care for the 2,000 staff. And if they’re healthy and growing in spirit, mind and body, then they’re going to be better equip to care for that 180,000 members.” -Dori [13:24]

“I love just listening to you talk about how proactive the Y is being in really serving their people… but recognizing that people coming through your doors are complex humans with needs that are not just physical, but they are spiritual and emotional as well.” -Anna [20:50]

“I’m also really grateful that a lot of the work you’re doing is educating and destigmatizing, it sounds, which is so, so needed, especially as mental health became–I would say, not that it maybe even rose–we became more aware of it coming out of the pandemic.” -Seth [21:42]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:06] Intro

[01:22] About this week’s guest

[05:13] Being a chaplain for the YMCA

[11:03] Spiritual and mental health

[14:53] A typical day of a YMCA chaplain

[22:15] Dori’s influences

[31:49] Challenges in her role as chaplain

[37:10] The role of inclusivity

[41:34] The role of spirituality and mental health

[45:01] A takeaway from Dori

[47:31] Outro

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Participant Interview: Jeremy Jennings

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 25 Sep 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant speak with Jeremy Jennings about his experience with Restore Small Groups. Jeremy shares how the communal experience helped him during his mental health journey and how training vs trying helped him shift his perspective from trying something out to training to be better every day.

“And that is what we strive for is to create that environment, that space, where people feel safe to share their story and to be heard and to connect with others.”-Anna [07:46]

“Built in that idea too is like mistakes are allowed then. It’s part of the process.” -Seth [09:37]

“I think people need a place where they can just truly be their authentic self, to truly be them and not be judged, and I think people will be surprised about what they’ll find or what they will discover about themselves.” -Jeremy [14:08]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:06] Intro

[01:24] Discovering Restore Small Groups

[05:05] Jeremy’s experience

[12:52] It feels good to be seen and heard

[14:42] Rapid fire questions

[19:08] Outro

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Curriculum: Acceptance

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 18 Sep 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Scott Reall, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant continue their discussions on Scott’s book, “Journey to a New Beginning after Loss: Freedom from the Pain of Grief and Disappointment.” They talk about Chapter 6 which is on the grief stage of acceptance, when a person comes to terms with the reality of their loss.

“It’s not that the issue gets resolved as much as it gets dissolved.” -Seth [06:10]

“Grief helps us grow.”-Anna [14:52]

“Recognizing that we are powerless over these areas of our lives and naming them, I believe, is the beginning of comfort and healing.” -Scott [25:07]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:35] Defining acceptance

[06:41] Examples of reaching acceptance

[15:24] Lack of acceptance keeps us from growing

[22:35] The concept of powerlessness

[27:52] The next steps towards acceptance

[33:20] Acceptance is not a linear process

[36:19] Outro

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Journey to Freedom: Your Start to a Lifetime of Hope, Health, and Healing

Scott Reall’s Books:

Journey to a New Beginning after Loss: Freedom from the Pain of Grief and Disappointment

Journey to Healthy Living: Freedom from Body Image and Food Issues

Journey to a Life of Significance: Freedom from Low Self-Esteem

The State of Nashville with Adam Buzard

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 11 Sep 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Scott Reall, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant speak with Adam Buzard, Director of United4Pastors, which brings pastors together in the Greater Nashville community. Adam talks about his listening tour where he sat down with over 200 pastors in Nashville to discuss how they’re doing and the two major themes that emerged from those discussions. He also shares what he learned through The State of Nashville study and its impact in helping the organization's understanding of the world.

“I think one of the challenges and opportunities we have is–again–listen. Listen first.” -Adam [14:51]

“I really believe that a part of being a healthy, well-rounded leader is to provide safe spaces for vulnerability and healing.” -Seth [29:01]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:13] About this week’s guest

[03:21] His work with United4Pastors

[08:11] The State of Nashville

[14:11] Addressing the challenges

[18:24] Strategies to build trust

[28:59] The impact in Nashville

[34:16] Advice for Pastors

[36:54] How to contact Andrew

[38:26] Outro

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Operation Andrew Group: operationandrew.org

The State of Nashville: stateofnashville.com

Participant interview: Marcel Patillo

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 04 Sep 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Scott Reall, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant speak with Marcel Patillo about his experience with Restore Small Group. Initially joining to strengthen himself on an emotional level, Marcel shares how the eight-week program with an initial group of strangers helped him gain a new perspective and a new clarity of who he is and why he is the way he is.

“One of our primary things for going through our groups is you cultivate self-awareness. You can’t really travel a map without locating where you are on the map.” -Seth [06:52]

“I love the articulation of like eight weeks is not going to change your life. You’re not going to walk out completely different in circumstantially your life looks brand new, but it’s like the start.”-Anna [07:25]

“By identifying where you’ve been and why you might have the feelings that you have, it can unlock new paths to process in your life that you may have never imagined really.” -Marcel [19:00]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[00:47] This week’s guest, Marcel

[01:38] What drew Marcel to Restore Small Groups

[02:47] Marcel’s experience with Restore Small Groups

[07:25] Putting tools in your tool chest

[10:28] Identifying who he is

[12:35] The collaborative effort

[18:33] Why recommend Restore Small Groups

[21:07] Rapid fire questions

[24:30] Outro

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Topical: “Cultivating Life-giving Practices”

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 28 Aug 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Scott Reall, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant talk about cultivating life-giving practices, which are healthy habits that nurtures your mental, emotional or spiritual well being. They share examples of practices to integrate into your daily life as well as what practices have shaped them personally to stir some ideas to cultivate well being.

“We need life-giving practices because we need to attend to our well-being, and that doesn’t just happen naturally, right? It requires intentionality.” -Seth [05:18]

“Cultivating relationships with people that are also emotionally available in your life, so whether that’s friendships or family or whatever kind of relationships that you find yourself in. They’re not all going to be your best friends, but finding safe places where you can really be your real self and connect deeply and authenticity with others is crucial in maintaining emotional well-being.” -Anna [16:16]

“I believe that God—is my understanding–is my friend, and so I look at spending time with my friend, and building my friendship with God is a very spiritual process for me.” -Scott [17:49]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:04] Intro

[02:02] What is a life-giving practice & why we need them

[05:49] Defining well being

[08:43] What life-giving practices are not

[09:51] Mental practices

[13:30] Cultivating for emotional well being

[16:41] Spiritual well being practices

[19:50] What practices shape the hosts personally

[25:43] How to integrate these practices into daily life

[27:45] Helpful tips to manage obstacle and setbacks

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Curriculum: “Forgiveness”

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 21 Aug 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Scott Reall, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant discuss Chapter Six in Scott’s book, Journey to a New Beginning after Loss, which is about forgiveness. They draw from personal experiences to discuss three stages around forgiveness–the forgiveness of others, the forgiveness of God and the forgiveness of ourselves–as well as debunk the misconceptions around this process.

“You can forgive someone without reestablishing a relationship. Forgiveness does not mean that you are obliterating your boundaries.” -Anna [07:43]

“I think forgiveness is just so, so powerful in that it’s for me. It’s for me. It has nothing to do with the other person. It doesn’t have anything to do with the events. It’s for me.” -Scott [10:52]

“What moves us to acceptance and peace ultimately is forgiveness, because it is feeling the emotion so that we can move through it and process it and metabolize it so that it can stop being stuck and we can keep moving as the process that we are.” -Seth [29:08]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:27] Intro

[01:56] Definition of forgiveness

[05:20] Misconceptions around forgiveness

[19:50] Hard to forgive

[25:31] The value of forgiveness

[29:29] The practice of forgiveness

[37:35] Forgiving God

[46:26] Forgiving yourself

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Journey to Freedom: Your Start to a Lifetime of Hope, Health, and Healing

Scott Reall’s Books:

Journey to a New Beginning after Loss: Freedom from the Pain of Grief and Disappointment

Journey to Healthy Living: Freedom from Body Image and Food Issues

Journey to a Life of Significance: Freedom from Low Self-Esteem

Learning to Live Fully in Ordinary Life with Sarah Ruccio Huffman

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 14 Aug 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Scott Reall, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant speak with Sarah Ruccio Huffman, the Healing Arts Coordinator at Monthaven Arts and Cultural Center. Sarah has worked as a clinical chaplain and an expressive therapist in a variety of environments, and she discusses the value of therapy. She shares the pivotal moment that inspired her to help other people learn how to live fully in an ordinary life. She also talks about her experience with Restore Small Groups and the direct correlation between her expressive therapy groups and Restore Small Groups.

“It’s so impressive that you are able to get to that point to realize like I do need help. I do need to talk about these things. And then when you do normalize helping yourself, how that in turn helps others that are watching your story unfold.” -Anna [10:04]

“The underlying message there is that asking for help is a sign of weakness, and so I have learned along the way that asking for help is a sign of strength.” -Sarah [10:42]

“Spirituality assists and supports an expansion of our identity.” -Seth [20:59]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[00:50] This week’s guest, Sarah

[01:52] Becoming an expressive therapist

[06:16] A pivotal moment

[11:06] The value of art therapy

[13:51] Current therapy trends

[21:33] Helping military veterans

[27:30] Her experience with Restore Small Groups

[32:12] Primary issues in therapy community

[35:45] The Journey to Freedom process

[41:24] Listen to yourself and respond

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Participant Interview: Tamara Lankford

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 07 Aug 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant speak with Tamara Lankford about her experience with Restore Small Groups. Tamara shares what inspired her to sign up, how she overcame her shyness that led her to open up and be vulnerable and why she would recommend others to join a small group.

“Being in a group, it’s like working out with friends instead of trying to convince yourself to work out on your own everyday. It’s something that pushed me. It committed me to being there once a week. But the people, the environment, everything definitely allowed me to relax and open up.” -Tamara [05:32]

“We need more people that are growing and healthy and willing to be made uncomfortable so that they can become the fullest versions of themselves.” -Anna [07:58]

“Man, I love that analogy of helping you move on down the river, because I do think, continually that, like we tend to get stuck on either side of the river, and we’re not flowing in our life.” -Seth [09:59]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[00:42] This week’s guest, Tamara

[02:13] How she came to Restore Small Groups

[04:10] Week 1 vs Week 8

[08:09] Moving though the river

[10:15] The communal experience

[13:03] Rapid fire questions

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Topical Episode: “Authenticity”

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 31 Jul 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Scott Reall, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant talk about the concept of authenticity. Through their personal experiences, they discuss the practice of letting go who we think we’re supposed to be so that we can embrace who we are. To do this, they explore the key components of authenticity: self-awareness, honesty, consistency, vulnerability, self-acceptance and autonomy.

“To me, authenticity is the heart of self-awareness.” -Scott [02:06]

“I think that you understand your limitations and you embrace that, but you also understand your strengths. You understand what you bring to the table.” -Anna [19:03]

“It can be so, so difficult to be authentic when we’re afraid of what other people think, when we’re afraid of what can happen if we were to actually disclose parts of ourselves.” -Seth [53:12]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:00] Intro

[01:09] Defining authenticity & why it’s important

[07:12] Being who I am, not who I’m supposed to be

[13:05] Feeling free to be myself

[16:05] Self-awareness and honesty

[21:36] Consistency and vulnerability

[27:06] Self-acceptance and autonomy

[30:05] Personal examples of authenticity

[40:39] Values of authenticity

[43:15] Inauthenticity & struggling to be authentic

[56:22] Ways to practice authenticity

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Curriculum: “Depression & Sadness”

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 24 Jul 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Scott Reall, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant discuss the fourth chapter in Scott’s book, Journey to a New Beginning after Loss: Freedom from the Pain of Grief and Disappointment, about depression and sadness. They discuss the grief stages through personal examples and how to distinguish between feeling depressed from feeling sad.

“But you’re not going to get from depression to acceptance unless you really start to feel and process those sad feelings.” -Anna [06:56]

“What I have found that’s really profound for me is that there’s a shame attached to our depression, which makes us even more isolated with what we’re struggling with.” -Scott [28:56]

“There were just so many moments of uncontrollable emotion that was kind of having its way with me, and so, I just remember realizing I had to let it have its way with me.” -Seth [42:07]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[00:27] Last live music experience

[02:20] Depression and sadness

[08:49] More specific definitions

[12:12] Depression as a form of self-suppression

[16:55] Feeling depressed vs living with depression

[19:15] Characteristics of depression

[22:21] Defining sadness

[30:01] Living from a false self

[32:17] More personal examples

[43:56] Practical thoughts to move through sadness

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Journey to Freedom: Your Start to a Lifetime of Hope, Health, and Healing

Scott Reall’s Books:

Journey to a New Beginning after Loss: Freedom from the Pain of Grief and Disappointment

Journey to Healthy Living: Freedom from Body Image and Food Issues

Journey to a Life of Significance: Freedom from Low Self-Esteem

Participant Interview: Beth Joseph

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 17 Jul 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant speak with Beth Joseph about her experience with Restore Small Groups. Beth shares how her first small group made her feel seen, which allowed her to be the fullest version of herself. She also discusses how this inspires her to return and participate in multiple groups.

“From week one to week eight, I feel like those people, even to this day–I don’t know, a year and a half later since we had that first group–like they know me better than people who have known me for 10 years.” -Beth [10:08]

“I remember you walking in that first day and just being a little frazzled and late and being brave to just walk into a room of people, and then to come back again, just slowly let your story unfold with these people. Man, what a gift. What a gift.” -Anna [10:49]

“That is some of the magic of the process. We create this safe environment where you can name the painful parts of your life, the struggles, the issues, and you’re still accepted like you’re alluded to earlier. You’re still ok in the eyes of everyone. There’s non-judgement that fills the room.” -Seth [19:16]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[00:54] This week’s guest, Beth

[04:28] What drew Beth to join a Restore Small Group

[06:05] Her experience with Restore

[11:10] The contrast between Week 1 and Week 8

[21:28] What Beth uncovered about herself

[26:27] A pitch for Restore Small Group

[28:00] Rapid fire questions

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Participant Interview: Rianne McCulloch

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 10 Jul 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant speak with Rianne McCulloch about her experience with Restore Small Groups. Rianne shares how small groups taught her to be vulnerable to help her move forward in her process as well as help a group of strangers become friends during the eight week program.

“And I think that’s one of the big things that I learned from Week 1 to Week 8 was you get out of it what you put into it.” -Rianne [04:06]

“There’s a lot of different things that happen within those eight weeks. You go from–like you mentioned–stranger to an interesting community real quick, because of the vulnerability that the experience lends itself to.” -Seth [05:09]

“There’s something about that year nine at the end of the decade that really propels you into a new direction.” -Anna [07:11]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[00:55] This week’s guest, Rianne

[01:53] Why join a Restore Small Group

[03:12] Her experience in a small group

[09:09] Why she recommends Restore

[11:18] Rapid fire questions

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Topical Episode: “Intrinsic Hope”

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 03 Jul 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Scott Reall, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant have a conversation about intrinsic hope. Hope is dynamic and a powerful force that is essential in the human experience. The three hosts discuss this feeling as it relates to growth and change and how it can help keep us forward. They share what hope means to them and how to practical ways to cultivate it.

“One of the ways that I think I view hope is it’s the ground that I stand on that is unchanging, no matter what the weather is.” -Seth [12:51]

“We can’t obviously control what is happening externally, but the ways that we experience what is happening externally has everything to do with our mental framework, whether we are looking at it from a growth mindset or a fixed mindset.” -Anna [25:29]

“To me, the greatest motivator in all of life is hope.” -Scott [38:11]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[00:21] How hopeful are you feeling?

[04:21] What does hope mean to you?

[13:04] How threatening it can be to hope

[19:00] Qualities of hope

[25:59] Link between hope and trust

[32:03] Hope and identity

[39:16] Growth and transformation

[43:45] How to cultivate hope

[56:17] The Welcoming Prayer

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Reconnecting to Spiritual Strength with Janele Nelson

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 26 Jun 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Scott Reall, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant speak with Janele Nelson, Mission Director at YMCA of Pierce and Kitsap Counties. Scott and Janele have known each other for almost 20 years after her job sent her to Restore Small Groups in Nashville. Janele discusses her work at the YMCA and how the organization continues to provide a great place to help people reach their full potential during this time of divisiveness. She also talks about her experience with Small Groups and its impact.

“Staff development isn’t just professional. I mean, staff in the Y, you can’t give away what you don’t have. So if you’re there to actually help people in spirit, mind, body and you’re suffering, and no one’s paying attention to yours, that’s not good. It doesn’t work.” -Janele [09:21]

“I think everybody does struggle with a human condition and it looks different and unique for all of us.” -Anna [12:50]

“‘Cause I see you as a worldwide leader. Always have.” -Scott [22:55]

“We like to say, ‘What we do is solitaire work that can’t be done alone,’ and we do need to transcend moving from me to we.” -Seth [26:25]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[00:23] This week’s guest, Janele

[04:31] YMCA’s current work worldwide

[08:13] Janele’s role as Mission Director

[13:18] Primary issues in her community

[18:11] The value of Restore Small Groups

[22:27] Janele’s mission and purpose in life

[27:02] Restore’s impact in non-Christian environment

[30:53] What’s on Janele’s heart to share

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Curriculum - Journey to New Beginnings: The Grief Stage of Bargaining

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 19 Jun 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Scott Reall, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant talk about the bargaining stage of grief. This stage is a refusal to accept a reality from a loss, but goes beyond denial as it’s trying to create an alternative reality mentally. The three hosts discuss how this stage can show up and give practical tips on how to work through it.

“It’s like I can’t heal an emotional wound with knowledge.” -Scott [07:13]

“I think that’s one of the hardest reasons why loss is so difficult because there’s not a way to make sense of it.” -Seth [10:48]

“Seth, I think that’s such a beautiful reminder just that people don’t need answers so much as they need presence.” -Anna [20:03]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:07] Reflect on a loss in your life

[02:30] Writing the chapter on bargaining

[07:22] Unresolved grief

[09:25] What is bargaining

[13:10] How religion can interfere with grief

[17:54] People don’t always need answers, just presence

[21:43] Complete the grief

[27:56] Blaming ourselves

[30:53] Working through the bargaining stage

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Journey to Freedom: Your Start to a Lifetime of Hope, Health, and Healing

Scott Reall’s Books:

Journey to a New Beginning after Loss: Freedom from the Pain of Grief and Disappointment

Journey to Healthy Living: Freedom from Body Image and Food Issues

Journey to a Life of Significance: Freedom from Low Self-Esteem

Participant Interview: Taylor Grice

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 12 Jun 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Seth Abram speaks with Taylor Grice of Nashville about her experience with Restore Small Groups. Taylor shares what she uncovered about herself as she unpacked her story in the eight-week program. As she started to see pieces of herself in others, she developed special bonds with the peer group, and she describes how the community helped her move forward with some growth in her life.

“There is something that happens in a group as you get deeper and deeper, and you’re sharing more and more vulnerable things about yourself, where you start to–at least for me–I started to see pieces of my story in others, and it gave me the space to share.” -Taylor [07:02]

“When somebody else shares something about themselves, it unlocks something in me that I didn't have access to before until you name that about your story.” -Seth [09:11]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:22] This week’s guest, Taylor

[03:25] Joining Restore Small Groups

[04:59] Walking to the first group with strangers

[10:46] What she discovered sharing her story

[14:46] A group of strangers become friends

[18:16] One of the most formational thing

[19:57] Lighting round

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Topical Episode: “Loneliness, Belonging & Community”

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 05 Jun 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Scott Reall, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant have a conversation around loneliness, belonging and community and the relationship between the three. In this vulnerable conversation, the three hosts discuss how these deeply connected elements play a significant role in mental and emotional well-being and share practical takeaways to deal with loneliness in a healthy way and build a more meaningful community.

“I also think that the chronic epidemic of loneliness is deadly. I don’t think we can talk enough about how important it is that a person finds true connection.” -Scott [09:40]

“I’m just thinking about how the fine line between loneliness and belonging is largely around disclosure, how much of yourself you’re willing to disclose to truly find belonging and connect with people or not.” -Seth [14:46]

“Community is the antidote to loneliness and belonging, but just to remember that community is the people. It’s not person.” -Anna [42:29]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:58] Loneliness: the pain of being alone

[06:27] The biggest loneliness pandemic

[14:12] Belonging: security and support

[22:35] Community: mutual support and belonging

[33:42] Bringing these three terms together

[43:04] Self-esteem vs self-worth

[50:54] Practical takeaways

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Curriculum - Journey to New Beginnings: The Role of Anger in Grieving Loss

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 29 May 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Scott Reall, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant continue to explore one of Scott’s books, “Journey to a New Beginning after Loss: Freedom from the Pain of Grief and Disappointment,” and focus on the second chapter about anger–one of the stages of grief. They discuss our relationship with anger, the benefits of it during this stage and how to work through it.

“Anger is a hard one to wrestle with, and I think it’s so important for us to recognize that every feeling, whether it’s a pleasant feeling or a seemingly unpleasant feeling has both a benefit and an impairment.” -Anna [05:23]

“When you lose something, you feel that just complete untethered-ness to what was normal. Anger is what holds you up, I think, especially in the beginning. Anger is what holds you up and keeps you from being completely lost in it all. Anger is just vital, I think, to the grieving process.” -Seth [08:30]

“Forgiveness is a big part of our work in grief recovery.” -Scott [22:38]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:20] Stages of grief

[05:02] Benefits of anger

[09:25] Reality hits

[15:10] Wrong expectations

[19:58] Resentment and regret

[23:53] The role of forgiveness

[27:43] How to work through anger

[33:35] Final thoughts

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Journey to Freedom: Your Start to a Lifetime of Hope, Health, and Healing

Scott Reall’s Books:

Journey to a New Beginning after Loss: Freedom from the Pain of Grief and Disappointment

Journey to Healthy Living: Freedom from Body Image and Food Issues

Journey to a Life of Significance: Freedom from Low Self-Esteem

The Mindset of Change with Heather Lefebvre

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 22 May 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Scott Reall and George Stull speak with Heather Lefebvre, a licensed psychotherapist who focuses on marriage and family therapy. Heather previously worked for Restore Small Groups over a decade ago, where her and her husband, Steven, were essential in the development and growth of the organization. She shares her journey with Small Groups and how it inspired her to transition into the mental health field.

“If I’m sitting there with a therapist, I want to know that they’ve been down this road too. ‘Cause you and I say you can’t lead somebody out of the desert if you’ve never been in the desert. And so, Heather’s been in the desert.” -Scott [04:31]

“Group is always a tethering point of I am not alone. I am not the only one who struggles. I cannot process in my head alone and think that that is going to help me challenge belief systems, challenge my neural pathways. Like that’s not enough. I really need to go and be around, be in community, be with people who are also fighting the good fight, who are also continually seeing life as a growth opportunity.” -Heather [14:34]

“So friends, when your therapist is encouraging you to move to a more vulnerable place, trust them. They really do understand how we can grow and how we can heal.” - George [21:07]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:19] This week’s guest, Heather

[05:05] How Heather came to love Restore Small Groups

[11:30] Transitioning to the mental health field

[12:48] The value of individual therapy and small groups

[17:26] Vulnerability is healthy to our growth

[21:19] Why Small Groups are beneficial

[25:21] How neurobiology influences her therapy approach

[33:46] Recommended helpful practices

[37:36] We are good enough

[41:17] Heather’s website and final words

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Heather’s Website: mytherapistheather.com

Participant Interview: “L.A. Mike”

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 15 May 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant speak with Mike “L.A. Mike” Rada about his experience with Restore Small Groups. Mike shares how feeling lost mentally, physically and spiritually after a pretty bad case of COVID-19 inspired him to join a Small Group. He takes the host through his journey that quickly evolved into sharing vulnerably.

“It allowed me to let myself be vulnerable for once, and it was a very welcoming group of people. It was strange for me, but then it also felt great. It gave me a chance to let my guard down.” -Mike [09:11]

“I think it’s a really great description of some of the magic of what happens in a group. Where we meet one another is in our humanity first.” -Seth [11:06]

“I think you articulated well though. Like it was a catalyst for you to maybe connect your inner world and your outer world in a more honest way with the people in your life.” -Anna [15:52]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[00:28] Today’s guest, Mike

[01:54] What drew him to Restore Small Groups

[05:43] His first and last days

[11:36] Sharing vulnerably

[14:50] Something that had an impact on Mike

[18:32] Why recommend Small Groups to others?

[20:46] Lighting round

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Topical Episode: “Vulnerability”

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 08 May 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Scott Reall, George Stull, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant talk about vulnerability. They explore what this means in the context of mental and emotional well-being and break down the myths about it. Listen as they share strategies for leaning into our vulnerability and embracing authenticity.

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:19] Defining vulnerability

[03:21] Myths about vulnerability

[09:12] “I don’t do vulnerability”

[14:34] Can’t go it alone

[16:48] What is vulnerability

[22:09] Within the framework of relationships

[32:46] Takeaways and strategies

[38:30] Four feeling questions

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Faith and Mental Health with Jason Adam Miller

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 01 May 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Seth Abram and Anna Bryant speak with Jason Adam Miller, a pastor at South Bend City Church and author of the book, When The World Breaks: The Surprising Hope and Subversive Promises in the Teachings of Jesus. Jason is a helpful voice in bringing mental, well-being and faith together in such a meaningful way, so he discusses how to find hope where there’s suffering and struggle. He shares his church’s mantras and recommended practices when the hard stuff happens such as welcoming emptiness.

“When faith works until it doesn’t at a particular time in your life, like when you encounter some kind of experience and the faith we were given, sometimes it doesn't work, and you can do one of two things: you can entirely chuck faith or you can open up to maybe a new way of understanding your faith. It could be more hopeful.” -George [05:59]

“Often failure’s the best thing, right? Like whether you’re practicing a musical instrument or spiritual practice, you come to the limit of your capacity and that’s actually the liminal space where something really powerful can happen. But if you’re afraid to fail, you’ll never let yourself go there.” -Jason [16:05]

“God created each of us so incredibly uniquely. I mean, you’ve never seen two apples that look exactly alike. Like they all have very different dimensions, different qualities, and that’s what God intended for humanity. That we’re all unique. Like no two pieces of any kind of produce are identical, but anything you get coming out of a factory will be 100% identical all the time. And when we’re driven to become a carbon copy of something that we were never created to be, I just think it’s very beautiful that you’re creating this space for people to be fully human, fully unique, fully who they are.” -Anna [18:47]

“I think a lot of times people make this misconception that surrender is a passive thing, especially spiritual kind of surrender, when I think returning to the breath is an act of surrender. That I’m letting go, but it’s a deep trust that there’s something holding me while I’m experiencing this.” -Seth [24:38]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:03] Intro

[00:24] This week’s guest, Jason Adam Miller

[02:30] What opens Jason’s heart to faith and mental health

[07:31] Letting grieve consume and losing your faith

[13:16] His church’s mantras

[19:36] Recommended practices

[25:06] Misconceptions of mental health and faith

[27:27] Welcoming emptiness

[33:48] How to contact Jason

[36:02] One final message from Jason

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Book: When The World Breaks: The Surprising Hope and Subversive Promises in the Teachings of Jesus

Jason Adam Miller

Web: jasonadammiller.com

IG: @jasonadammiller

Pod: South Bend City Church Podcast

Curriculum - Journey to New Beginnings: Grief- Chapter 1

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 24 Apr 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Seth Abram, Scott Reall and Anna Bryant do implement the third of their four styles of episodes in this new season by talking about curriculum. They explore one of Scott’s books, “Journey to a New Beginning after Loss: Freedom from the Pain of Grief and Disappointment,” and talk about grief and loss. Scott explains how our whole life is nothing but a journey of losing things, and nothing stays the same. The three hosts discuss how people interpret grief and loss and the different types of grief and loss as there are more than death or divorce.

“Unless we’re taught how to deal with loss, most of us aren’t going to move into processing it, which is the grief, which is allowing ourselves to feel the loss.” -Seth [09:13]

“We need to be comfortable with the uncomfortable, and normalize that life isn’t always comfortable. And be ok with that.” -Anna [13:24]

“We cannot make a new beginning if I’m still holding on and stuck in the past.” -Scott [33:48]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:04] Intro

[01:11] The inspiration for the book

[03:33] Cultural misconceptions

[06:39] To complete communications

[08:06] The difference between loss and grief

[15:07] Different types of losses we grapple with

[32:23] Final words from the hosts

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Journey to Freedom: Your Start to a Lifetime of Hope, Health, and Healing

Scott Reall’s Books:

Journey to a New Beginning after Loss: Freedom from the Pain of Grief and Disappointment

Journey to Healthy Living: Freedom from Body Image and Food Issues

Journey to a Life of Significance: Freedom from Low Self-Esteem

Participant Story: Jim Clements

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 17 Apr 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram hear from Jim Clement, a participant of Restore Small Group from Franklin, Tennessee. Jim talks about his experience in a small group, how it brought him relief during a period of grief and isolation and what the overall experience means to him.

“When I heard those stories, it was the first thing that brought me any sort of relief at all. Was just to hear that there are fellow travelers out there. I’m not alone. There are other people that are experiencing what I am.” -Jim [06:24]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:06] Intro

[00:54] About Jim Clements

[02:05] Joining a Restore Small Group

[08:11] First and last nights of group

[13:14] The group’s impact

[14:44] Would Jim recommend a small group?

[16:42] A quick lighting round

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

Topical Episode: “Awareness”

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 10 Apr 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram start a new series format with a topical episode about awareness. The more aware a person is, the more cognizant they are of how they show up in the world. The hosts discuss how we see and understand this concept and how we can start by aiming the awareness towards ourselves so that we can begin to grow.

“I think you can’t find change, real meaningful change and lasting change in your life or growth in your life without cultivating some capacity for awareness, self-awareness, awareness of yourself.” -Seth [01:49]

“There’s two parts to awareness for me. There’s awareness of how I got here, but there’s also an awareness of where am I resisting? Where is it that I don’t want to be aware?” -Scott [06:58]

“Sometimes we protect ourselves and don’t want to be self-aware because there’s some greatness or some responsibility that we have to show up in the world in some way, right? And there’s some gift we are to the world. So sometimes, it can be protecting ourselves from, we don’t want to fail.” -George [09:20]

“Everybody has limitations. Everybody struggles. Everyone also has strengths. And so, the sum of your strengths doesn’t make you more superhuman. And the sum of your limitations doesn’t make you less than human. We are all human. And having an understanding of that and holding the tension between that is critical for self-acceptance, and you have to have that in order to grow.” -Anna [11:47]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:04] Intro

[01:06] An intimate look at our lives

[02:53] How we see and understand this concept

[05:30] We see what we believe

[10:51] Non-judgemental presence

[14:54] Looking from a place of shame, doubt and fear

[17:45] Moments of unawareness

[26:11] It doesn’t matter old how you are

[29:02] A couple of takeaways

Follow and Contact

Facebook: Restore Small Groups

Instagram: @restoresmallgroups

New Season Coming!

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 03 Apr 2024 05:00:00 -0500

After exploring The Journey of Transformation over 36 episodes, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram preview what’s to come on the Searching Inward Podcast. The new format will start in the next episode. Stay tuned!

“...We’re going to have the wonderful opportunity to invite you in to meet some of the people that we dearly know and love, who have been a part of our groups, who have experienced significant life change and are going to come and just share a little part of their story and what has been so impactful for them through the group process.” -Anna [01:04]

“Stories. That’s what we all love, and especially stories of healing and hope.” -George [01:28]

“It’s one thing to hear somebody trying to describe what Restore Small Groups is. It’s another thing entirely to hear the impact going through a group has had on someone.” -Seth [01:35]

“Things like awareness and community and loneliness and hope and vulnerability, gratitude, and growth and just topics like that. Things we can really wrap our hearts around that will encourage us to stay on the path.” -Scott [02:08]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[00:40] The new format

[01:51] Different topics to discuss

[03:03] How it will work

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Journey to Freedom: Your Start to a Lifetime of Hope, Health, and Healing

Scott Reall’s Books:

Journey to a New Beginning after Loss: Freedom from the Pain of Grief and Disappointment

Journey to Healthy Living: Freedom from Body Image and Food Issues

Journey to a Life of Significance: Freedom from Low Self-Esteem

WOOP It

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 27 Mar 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram wrap up their series on the journey of transformation by talking about WOOP it, an acronym that helps us turn our wishes and dreams into a concrete plan. They discuss what keeps us motivated, where motivation comes from and what are some of the factors that shape intrinsic motivation in our lives.

“Having a goal without a plan is just wishes, so how do we move from wishes and dreams into a concrete plan or process that I can implement on a daily basis?” -Scott [04:45]

“This practice is one of the best ways to sum up this book, because it’s basically you use this WOOP practice as a way to co-create a new life for yourself through the process of contemplation and action.” -Seth [17:19]

“And it does a huge comfort to the rest of us to see that you are a fellow traveler. You don’t have it all figured out, because man, how can you trust someone that hasn’t struggled? So we love that you lead by example in all areas and that includes the struggle.” -Anna [25:03]

“I think the message of this whole journey of transformation is that it is a process that we’re always on.” -George [25:44]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[03:30] Willpower vs motivation

[09:28] Positive thoughts won’t transform us

[12:14] The WOOP method

[18:22] What challenges the hosts

[27:08] What is the Enneagram

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Out of the Shadows, Into the Light

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 20 Mar 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall and Anna Bryant talk about getting out of the shadows and into the light. There is only one way there – through vulnerability – so they explore this central question: Do we run from vulnerability? Or do we embrace it?

“But the true relationships I can be honest and vulnerable with, and their input is received as helpful and life-giving and affirming and it gives me life. One gives me life. The other one pulls me down.” -Scott [07:52]

“A much more helpful way that light works is that it just kind of shines the next step, the next place to move towards… Light can be helpful or it can be blinding in a condemning way.” -George [08:57]

“It is so important to remember, yall. Shadows don't exist without bright light. So in order to embrace those things about you that are less than perfect, you also have to reconcile the fact that that means there’s really something bright inside of you casting that shadow.” -Anna [13:49]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[00:48] The voice of condemnation

[03:01] How shadow and light play out in life

[09:14] Believing we are enough

[12:28] Ego wants to keep us in the shadows

[19:05] How we protect ourselves

[26:03] Where hope breaks in

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Finding Your North Star

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 13 Mar 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall and Anna Bryant talk about finding your North Star, keeping your eyes focused on a goal and not just your obstacles. Scott explains how to access this North Star through cognitive reframing and the tool he’s devised called STAR.

“If we have a North Star and we do get lost and we will get lost, disoriented in a fog of our shames and our struggles, I can get redirected.” -George [04:10]

“When you think about a star, in some way, it’s not just an outward guide, but it’s a light that shines inward, that shines into us in some way that reminds us and shines a bright light into who we authentically are.” -Scott [09:26]

“I think it’s so important to have really clear goals about who we want to be internally, the kind of being that we are, not the kind of doing that we achieve.” -Anna [11:30]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:19] What is STAR

[06:14] An exemplary cause

[13:02] The hosts’ North Stars

[15:59] The acronym of STAR

[20:15] Final words from the hosts

Follow and Contact

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Deliberate Practice

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 06 Mar 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram talk about deliberate practice, a growth mindset that puts in the work when success isn’t on the horizon. As we prepare for something that has yet to arrive, we are doing the work so that when it gets here, we can enjoy it. Listen as we discuss how deliberate practice changes our brains as well as the four hosts are practicing themselves.

“I think when we live with intention, that’s when we’re at our best.” -Scott [05:10]

“We know perfection does not exist, and I think sometimes we put so much pressure to try and to try and to try and to practice so that we are perfect. And I love that no, the goal isn't perfection. The goal is growth. Practice makes progress.” -Anna [07:30]

“Progress is so much more enjoyable when you’re doing it with others.” -George [13:34]

“I can’t just talk about wanting to grow in this massive idea. I have to get specific and deliberate with the areas in which I need to grow and focus my intentionality in that space.” -Seth [14:50]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[00:59] Preparing and doing the work

[02:52] Deliberate practice changes the brain

[06:33] Practice makes progress

[09:17] Creatively and deliberate practice working together

[11:48] Movement propels intrinsic motivation

[13:57] Focus on the area

[17:53] What the hosts are practicing today

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The Secret Ingredients to Happiness

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 28 Feb 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram talk about the secret ingredient to happiness. We explore how we can rethink our purpose outside our work in our pursuit for inner happiness so that we can find a deeper meaning in our lives. We discuss the role fear and shame play into our happiness, but also share what makes each of us happy.

“The end goal is finding meaning, finding purpose. It doesn’t have to be done a specific way or in a specific place.” -Anna [06:22]

“Sometimes I think we come into a point in life where we need to make our own personal meaning because the previously held understanding no longer makes sense for us.” -Seth [08:34]

“We’re not talking about denying fear in our life. In fact, the more that we can hold it and understand it, the more that we can move through it and grow and move towards more creativity that’s bringing greater happiness.” -George [18:40]

“Facing fear to me is one of the greatest challenges to live from a creative life, to keep growing.” -Scott [19:33]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:56] Intro

[01:35] How to start living fuller and happier lives

[04:23] Finding a deeper meaning

[07:08] Challenge to make new meanings for ourselves

[11:28] The role that fears plays in happiness

[19:05] Shame is a big part of fear

[21:30] What makes us happy?

[30:35] Happiness is what makes you feel alive

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Freedom to Let Go

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 21 Feb 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram talk about the freedom to let go, starting with the word – sobriety. Many times, we’re not aware that we’re not emotionally sober. Where do you run or escape to when you don’t want to experience reality during difficult times? To find the freedom to let go, we first need to become aware of where we are so we can get on the path.

“If we don’t know where we are, it’s really hard to get on the path to freedom.” -Scott [02:46]

“We have the constant need to be entertained so that we don’t have to feel, so that we don’t have to think, so that we don’t have to really take a hard look at what’s going on in our inner worlds.” -Anna [04:22]

“It’s hard to really become our more authentic self if we don’t love ourselves.” -George [16:57]

“I think the separate self is unaware thoughts.” -Seth [21:07]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[00:43] Define our sobriety

[05:35] Sobriety is an emotional process

[11:11] Knowing what you need freedom from

[14:57] Are you really free?

[17:30] What sobriety actually looks like

[21:20] True inner freedom

[26:17] Final thoughts

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Managing Expectations

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 14 Feb 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram talk about managing our expectations. Understanding our expectations or the lack of them can lead us to a lot of conflict with ourselves and our relationships. Listen as the four hosts discuss why understanding what we expect from our lives and others, managing disappointment and facing risks will be helpful for our journey.

“Here’s what I’m hearing you say, you have to be able to risk disappointment and risk failure to grow in this, right?” -George [08:34]

“Sometimes in our pain, we look and we see and focus in on what hurts, which tends to be something more negative. And in the midst of that, we can tend to overlook what is positive in our life.” -Anna [11:07]

“I really believe that everything that has been a blessing in my life has come through the mistakes I’ve made when I learn how to respond to it in a better way. That’s how I developed wisdom.” -Scott [16:42]

“People are definitely afraid to make mistakes and like I said from my perspective earlier, I think people are also afraid of disappointments too, feeling the disappointment. But I think another way to flip this on its head is to say that people are afraid of growing, because that includes resilience.” -Seth [17:42]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:12] Why managing expectations is important

[04:59] Managing disappointment

[09:08] Open ended expectations

[10:58] Disqualify the positives

[13:59] Facing risks is healthy

[18:59] Rise up and keep rising up

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Kenosis

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 07 Feb 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram talk about kenosis, which means to let go. This act of making room by letting go of something tired and empty starts with the hope of change. If we’re still clinging to other attachments, how can we ever be free for something new and better to come in? Listen as we discuss how to give yourself grace and the space to pause to start the process of kenosis.

“I just think that part of this is like if we don’t pause and make space to have a different option than the regular paradigm, then we can’t really expect ourselves to make any changes than our normal response.” -Seth [10:38]

“That’s why I think we need grace. Grace is the most powerful force here where it helps me become aware in a very loving way.” -Scott [15:25]

“Our paradigm sometimes of a growth mindset would be that we have to try harder, right? We have to put in more effort. We have to strive more, which is the actual opposite of what this kenosis process is. It’s opening up. It’s letting go. It’s trying softer. It’s not trying harder.” -Anna [17:10]

“The ultimate letting go is falling into this mystery of love at the center of the human experience and reality.” -George [28:17]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[00:34] The meaning of kenosis

[05:15] Changing fixed mindsets

[09:25] Revisiting our narratives

[13:56] Kenosis sets up the process

[21:22] Anxiety reveals where the trust is

[24:17] Preempted work to let go

[26:12] Final words to ponder

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Along the Barbwire

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 31 Jan 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram talk about finding hope in the midst of suffering through the story of Etty Hillesum, a Dutch Jewish writer who died at Auschwitz in 1943. The four hosts discuss how to create space for joy and hope when we’re surrounded by confining things.

“So she found freedom from within, although outwardly, she was surrounded by barbed wire.” -George [03:56]

“Only you have agency and authority over what thoughts you think and the feelings that you feel, and you can choose what to think and believe and feel.” -Anna [12:17]

“Within suffering, there’s always an obstacle or an invitation.” -Seth [24:08]

“From stimulus to response, we have this ability, this power of freedom, to make our choice.” -Scott [25:21]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:03] A story about a woman named Etty

[06:13] A new paradigm to exist in something we can't change

[09:03] How to move out of the paradigm

[13:47] Hope does not put us to shame

[18:01] Suffering to hope

[25:07] Possibility for every human

[28:23] Existence is not living

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The Idealized Image

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 24 Jan 2024 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram start the new year by talking about the idealized self – an inflated ego that flatters us with unmatched beauty, power, intelligence, fame, etc – which makes us arrogant and addicted to outside affirmations and recognition. They share how a healthy sense of self helps free us from this and why it’s important not to conflate our roles with our identities.

“The idealized self image is actually holding us back from that kind of change that happens within. It’s because we’re just pursuing affirmations on the outside and not really changing inwardly.” -George [04:38]

“My whole self worth is not grounded and rooted in how I perform at this one task in this one relationship. I am so much more than that.” -Anna [09:17]

“It sounds like when you conflate the role and identity together, you don’t have the capacity for making boundaries.” -Seth [11:39]

“For me being really transparent, what has been the most motivational, influential force in my life has been shame.” -Scott [17:08]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:38] A vicious cycle

[04:30] An idealized self image as a mother

[10:44] Role vs identity

[12:51] A healthy sense of self

[16:39] The underbelly of shame

[23:20] The rejection of myself

[26:51] The hands of unconditional love

Follow and Contact

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Some New Year's Fun!

Restore Small Groups — Mon, 01 Jan 2024 05:00:00 -0500

To celebrate the New Year, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram give the gift of laughter in this special bonus episode of the Searching Inward Podcast. Enjoy this compilation of outtakes!

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[00:58] A complication of outtakes

Follow and Contact

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Toxic Shame

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 27 Dec 2023 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram talk about toxic shame as an identity. Shame can take control by creating a false self, which demands a cover up. This is a significant topic to listen to as we discuss how powerful the false self can be detrimental to our mental, physical and emotional well-being.

“I think this is one of the most significant topics for our listeners. It’s just how powerful the allure is of the false self and just how detrimental that is to our mental and physical and our emotional well-being.” -Scott [05:25]

“I have learned to live out of the false self and I’ve been doing that for nearly 50 years. And I can say like I am utterly exhausted. I cannot continue to pour out of an empty cup, and to have needs is to be human. So learning to embrace that giving and giving and giving is not a virtue.” -Anna [18:36]

“That shame, that toxic shame was so heavy, I was almost ready and willing to just walk off the stage and never come back on. And I just remember I had to make a conscious choice. Like this is not who I am. I made a mistake, but I am not this mistake.” -Seth [24:19]

“But I just remember the shame I felt that day, and it lingered. And you would think, people were just going ‘Oh gosh, you made a mistake, George. It’s ok.’ But how deep that can go to our identity.” -George [26:32]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:00] Toxic shame as identity

[05:55] The false self and social media

[12:08] Shame is dualistic

[15:37] What it looks like to live it out

[24:51] Places of vulnerability

Follow and Contact

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Merry Christmas!

Restore Small Groups — Mon, 25 Dec 2023 05:00:00 -0500

Merry Christmas from the Searching Inward Podcast! George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram celebrate and reflect the holiday season in this special bonus episode.

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[00:52] The Christmas song in Scott’s heart

[02:12] A quick word on this Christmas Day

Follow and Contact

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Letting Go of Your Attachments

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 20 Dec 2023 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram talk about letting go of your attachments. Sometimes we can get trapped by an idea or hang on to things that are detrimental to our souls. We discuss why our desires get captured and how letting go is a process, even if it’s difficult.

“Letting go is a process that some of us may be involved in for the rest of our lives, but there can be freedom.” -Scott [05:10]

“What we have seen in group and what we see over and over again is like it is the unimpressiveness, it is the failures and shortcomings and the limitations and humanity that we witness in one another that really does draw people to each other.” -Anna [13:47]

“To really free ourselves, you guys, we really do need the help of other people.” -George [21:03]

“I think in my mind, this is what healing is: being able to receive love for all of our parts, whether they feel acceptable or not, and I think this is why we have to be vulnerable.” -Seth [28:51]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[00:26] Why is letting go so difficult?

[03:31] What is an attachment

[07:58] Letting go of an attachment

[12:52] Examples of false attachments

[17:13] Community to help us free ourselves

[25:12] We must feel secure in God’s love

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Belief & Expectations

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 13 Dec 2023 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram talk about beliefs and expectations and their impact on our brains. Using the placebo effect as our example, we discuss how beliefs and expectations create hope. We may not always have a choice in our circumstances, but we always have a choice with our response to these circumstances, which is crucial to maintain a hopeful mindset. We share how broadening our understanding of choice is helpful in moving us forward.

“We may not have a choice in what our circumstances are, but we undoubtedly always have a choice in how we choose to respond to the circumstances we find ourselves in.” -Anna [01:28]

“The quantity of the time I have is not what I have any control over really, but the quality of the time, I do have the ability to respond to.” -Scott [13:10]

“I'll be clear, sometimes it’s really important to have a no, right? There are areas that we close ourselves off to in allowing ourselves to grow in. Those are the areas in which you want to challenge and disconfirm that previous no, because there is potential. There’s other potential.” -Seth [17:50]

“So in a sense, we’re being invited to say yes to the waiting with the expectation and belief that something’s good is coming up.” -George [24:02]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:14] We always have a choice

[05:37] Hope and choice are connected

[09:52] Provisional existence

[14:40] Is there a no in your heart?

[22:04] Heading to Advent season

[24:41] Can I wait and believe?

[27:54] Final words from the hosts

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Destination Postcards

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 06 Dec 2023 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram talk about destination postcards, which are vivid pictures from the near future that show us what’s possible. We must envision what we want to become, so we discuss the role hope plays into this and why we must do something in the present to allow us to participate in the future of God.

“But I do know this, George. It takes effort to work from vision.” -Scott [03:33]

“I was just thinking like being able to expand our window of tolerance, being able to process our pain, helps us to maybe to circumvent that self-sabotage cycle.” -Anna [12:45]

“I would imagine gripping so tightly does not lead to any kind of serenity that is helpful at all in getting through, but open handed trust is what we’re aiming at.” -George [23:45]

“I’m just reminded that we’ve all been conditioned in the process of growing up to react in a patterned habitual way, and unless we work with that patterning, we’re not going to start showing up in the world in a different way. It doesn’t just happen. We have to work with that.” -Seth [25:52]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:01] Hope and vision are intertwined

[04:28] Visualization for cultivating resilience

[10:22] What some resistance might be

[17:16] Anticipation vs expectation

[23:56] Final words and takeaways

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Small Wins

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 29 Nov 2023 03:45:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram talk about small wins. A small win can make all the difference in how we feel and perform, and they discuss why focusing on progress, rather than perfection, is so important. They also share how setbacks are part of the process and how to overcome them.

“Just remembering that continued efforts, steady consistent effort over time, is what brings about the change that we’re looking for.” -Anna [04:42]

“I think progress isn’t only making the right choice every day to do this, to wake up again and go for it, but it’s also realizing that it includes also my attitude towards the mistakes that are going to be made along the way. That’s also progress.” -Seth [06:23]

“How we put up our sails is really how we respond to the storms or the wind around us and how that helps us go forward.” -George [20:44]

“I can’t control circumstances, but I can control how I respond to my circumstances.” -Scott [23:13]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:04] Intro

[00:33] Focusing on progress, not perfection

[02:54] Begin on a personal level

[04:51] Progress of change over time

[09:49] The Progress Principle

[14:21] Overcoming setbacks

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Happy Thanksgiving!

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 22 Nov 2023 03:00:00 -0500

We are so grateful for you! We are taking a much needed break! We'll see you here next week with a full episode!

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Nostalgia: Moving Back to Move Forward

Restore Small Groups — Tue, 14 Nov 2023 11:29:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram talk about nostalgia and its healing properties. Looking back on your life can either bring rich memories or a longing to go back and do things differently, sometimes both. We discuss how nostalgia can motivate us and how to use it to propel us to move forward.

“I think sometimes when we think about nostalgia,... we look back at it, maybe at a time when we were particularly connected and happy and feeling secure in those connections. And I think that too contributes to the feelings of nostalgia, especially when relationships change through either just time, distance, lost, development.” -Anna [12:23]

“If nostalgia is looking back while looking forward, then the other question is how do we want our stories to end?” -George [13:54]

“I think the nostalgia actually helps us in so many ways. It gives me a positive memory and I’m sad that it’s gone, but the strength of it is that it brings a positive memory and I have the ability to make those memories new now and I move forward.” -Scott [19:58]

“I think it’s just, for one, a good thing to keep in mind – Whenever there's a rumination of thought, it means something needs felt.” -Seth [23:26]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:01] Intro

[00:34] Looking back to move forward

[05:26] How the hosts experience nostalgia

[16:26] How nostalgia motivates us

[20:50] Can you avoid nostalgia?

[24:48] Use our paths to move us forward

[26:33] Groups for the upcoming year

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How Bad is Bad?

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 08 Nov 2023 05:01:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram discuss the bad days and negativity bias. All of us have bad days, but it can get really bad if we don’t get help. Without it, the negativity bias we hold about ourselves can make us addicted to safety and focused on averting obvious danger that keeps us from growing. Listen as we share how to get out of this negativity bias and come back to ourselves.

“I think we need to hear that when we do something that is meaningful or mattering or bringing good in the world to be intentional in people in our realm to call that out and to speak life into people, really.” -Anna [14:28]

“I think part of why this stuff can be so difficult is we all want to be seen but it’s really difficult to be seen too.” -Seth [14:45]

“The negative bias and the messages and the narrative and ultimately the paradigm is so deeply entrenched in us that we’re going to set ourselves up for failure if we think that I’m not still going to struggle with these things.” -Scott [17:30]

“Affirmation is not denying the struggle. It’s acknowledging and taking the risk to share that to ourselves and with others.” -George [24:47]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:07] How to get out of negativity bias

[04:33] Coming back to yourself

[10:24] What we heard growing up

[15:58] Perseverance and resistance

[25:12] The Nine-Enders

[30:29] Final thoughts

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Who’s Telling the Story

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 18 Oct 2023 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram discuss how we remember our past and how it helps us tell our story. We remember our experiences in story form, and we share how the two selves - the experiencing self and the remembering self - work together, and how they don’t always agree.

“Going back to your old narratives is really important.” -George [09:12]

“When you’re working with the reality of that emotion, then you can begin to change how you’re actually experiencing it.” -Seth [11:49]

“So, that’s me being conscious of what emotion is telling the story and trying to rewrite the narrative in a more positive direction.” -Anna [15:48]

“It doesn’t matter what has happened, where I’ve been, what have I struggled with, God and I can create a new beginning and write a new ending.” -Scott [27:18]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:13] Remembering self needs attention

[05:34] What emotion is telling the story?

[09:16] How to listen to the story

[17:17] Examples of small victories

[21:16] Final thoughts

[26:29] A final word of hope

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Changing our Factory Settings

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 11 Oct 2023 05:02:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall and Seth Abram discuss how to change our factory settings. As we get older, we can get stuck in our ways, but the factory settings of our minds can be changed. Today we share how we can do that by creating a new response by transforming our paradigms.

“It takes concentration. It takes self-discipline. It takes effort. It takes a supportive community. It’s going to take time.” -Scott [04:33]

“I think when people are able to allow into their hearts their community, then they can be informed by it.” -Seth [22:25]

“A negative is like velcro, and a positive is like Teflon. It slips off more quickly.” -George [22:52]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[02:30] Central point of the book

[08:07] The polyvagal theory

[15:02] Motivated by value

[19:32] Unconscious habit of overconfidence

[24:26] How long will we keep punishing ourselves?

[28:11] Final thoughts

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Striking at the Root of our Lies

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 04 Oct 2023 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram discuss the moments in our lives when we believe things that aren’t true. Thoughts based on flawed beliefs can create problems for us, and what one sees depends on what one looks for and expects. Listen as we talk about how self-awareness is one step in helping us interpret the reality in our lives and why community is also important for this.

“The beginning of self-awareness is something that can begin by ourselves, but the work of that goes way beyond just something that we do in our own heads and in our own hearts.” -George [03:00]

“Sharing our truths, sharing our stories from a place of humility can free us from denial, help us see what is really true and right, but there’s such dignity in all human beings when they tell the truth. You know what, this is what I struggle with. This is it. This is the truth.” -Scott [12:37]

“Humility is what Scott was saying, I think is what actually allows you to be here right now. Because it’s not thinking less of yourself, it’s thinking of yourself less.” -Seth [18:33]

“If I’m always looking for what’s good,… and not acknowledging what is actually causing injury to me and not processing my negative emotions, that is confirmation bias that can work in a favorable direction, but can also be hindering if it’s not balanced properly with realistic views of who I am and what I need.” -Anna [21:36]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[00:52] Why self-awareness so important

[02:54] Realizing we don’t have to do it alone

[08:29] Two biases: over-confidence & insecurity

[12:53] Which biases the hosts tend to lean to

[17:30] Healthy shame vs toxic shame

[20:05] How to live more free from biases

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The Seeds of Possibility

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 27 Sep 2023 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram talk about the seeds of possibility and learning how to grow beyond past failures and present crisis. Rethinking our identity and sowing the right seeds can help us shape the kind of harvest we desire.

“The most purest form of love that I’ve ever experienced in my life is Christ.” -Scott [04:43]

“Wholeness doesn’t mean perfection. Grace helps you realize that mistakes are integral to life, to being a whole person, to being a healthy person.” -Seth [07:35]

“The notion of thinking about seeds of possibility when things aren’t exactly like we hoped them to be, to believe that that’s possible would be a wonderful gift, because I think we wear ourselves out sometimes trying to work ourselves out of things.” -George [16:36]

“I think it’s a good reminder that there are ways that we can show up, but we can’t ultimately control every aspect of how life goes.” -Anna [25:22]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[00:59] Sowing the right seeds

[05:21] The practicality of grace

[12:18] Free ourselves in world of measurements

[19:24] Start with surrender of circumstances

[27:14] Identifying the new seeds to plant

[30:28] Yielding to the love of God

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Identifying God in the Brain

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 20 Sep 2023 05:01:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram discuss the science of God. The moment we encounter God or the idea of God, our brain begins to change.

“So with that frame of reference in mind, understanding that there is more to know about God than we currently have in our limited frame of reference.” -Anna [03:05]

“I think we all believe that a more loving, gracious experience of God leads to a more loving and gracious healing and growth of human beings in the world that we live in.” -George [13:41]

“I don’t know how we can work on a process of transformation. I don’t know how we can even live with a hope that is not tied to the belief that that’s the God who will love me no matter what I’ve done, where I’ve been, what I’ve struggled with and is always, always going to be there to help me fight my way out of that place, not from judgment, but from love.” -Scott [16:16]

“You know I tell my kids, I’m trying to teach them now that, you know, associate love with God. God with love. Those two things are synonymous. So you are not separate from God. You are a part of God and when you are embodying love to someone, you’re showing them God.” -Seth [21:57]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:43] A new picture of God

[09:03] How to live more free

[14:06] It matters how we think about God

[17:49] A text out of Romans

[24:10] Why was this important for Day 15

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Aiming Our Thoughts Higher

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 13 Sep 2023 05:01:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram talk about the process of rerouting our thoughts towards where we want to go. The mind is the most powerful instrument in our lives. The four hosts discuss how our thoughts can transform our lives and create a whole new beginning.

“The idea about how transformation actually comes to be, it says something about the reality of how transformation really works in one’s life.” -Seth [11:15]

“The mind is the most powerful instrument in our lives, because it will determine and dictate where we go, up or down.” -Scott [17:33]

“I love connecting to the concept of hope and how looking up is going to… it is going to determine our trajectory of where we go with our thoughts and our reality and our behavior.” -Anna [19:09]

“We need community. We need healing community to do this well.” -George [22:32]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:13] Intro

[00:55] About Scott’s upcoming book

[03:26] Think about excellence

[06:40] Rerouting our thoughts

[13:45] The anticipation molecule

[18:09] The chemical of possibility

[22:30] We need community

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How to Silence the Inner Critic

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 06 Sep 2023 05:09:35 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram discuss how to silence your inner critic. What we consistently tell ourselves about ourselves is what forms us. We discuss how our inner critic can affect the quality of our mental health and our relationship with that. We also share how to silence our inner critic.

“Understanding where our narrative comes from, how that inner critic has been informed through our circumstances, can help us to begin to change the narrative.” -Anna [11:03]

“So memories of those scars of where in our lives we have been shamed, they make a very powerful narrative, imprinted critical narrative.” -Scott [17:55]

“I like to think there’s an ability to turn the inner critic like a spy into the inner observer. I think this is much less about rejecting anything and more understanding to the fact that at some point in time, this voice was very important for our protection and being accepted in the environments that we grew up in childhood.” -Seth [23:50]

“That sounds like a way to silence the inner critic is to remember the past in a completely new way.” -George [28:51]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:34] Intensity, frequency and duration

[03:16] Conscious mind vs inner critic

[07:26] Our thoughts influence our behavior

[13:16] Feeling deeply inadequate

[18:07] Silencing our inner critic

[21:19] The inner observer

[26:15] Priming thoughts to do things boldly

[29:23] Growth requires risk and vulnerability

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The Great and Precious Promises of God

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 30 Aug 2023 05:01:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram talk about the great and precious promises of God. They discuss how we change habits by changing the cues that activate behavior and exploring the motivation and context behind these habits.

“Context for me is very curated and that’s what allows for the motivation and the ambition to actually happen to get this stuff done.” -Seth [11:06]

“To change any habitual pattern in our lives, we have to sustain motivation. It always comes down to motivation.” -Scott [13:02]

“To me, the reward wasn’t about what was coming on the other side of that externally, but it was like what it was doing for me internally.” -Anna [15:32]

“So it’s a letting go of something and then in return, something is poured in.” -George [19:00]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:16] Celebration of Hope

[05:30] Habit formation

[12:37] Sustain motivation

[18:07] Kenosis and theosis

[22:21] Final thoughts

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Habits need more than friction

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 23 Aug 2023 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram talk about habits and how to change our mindsets towards them by adding friction. We also discuss that to work with this transformation, we need to realize that this is also a matter of the heart.

“Bad habits are like comfortable beds. Easy to get into, but hard to get out of.” -George [01:46]

“God’s will is all about indwelling goodness and being fully ourselves, who he created us to be. It’s not so much figuring out is this the thing that God wants me specifically to be doing.” -Anna [11:23]

“I think what God’s will is more about human flourishing. What does it look like for us to flourish wherever we are doing whatever it is that we feel is our vocation.” -Seth [14:46]

“Freedom comes with a great cost and it takes courage to face this journey. And that’s why you cannot do it alone. You need a healing community.” -Scott [20:22]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:43] A matter of the heart

[04:57] Work with transformation

[07:17] God’s will

[12:33] The connection between God’s will and bad habits

[18:10] What will satisfy my soul?

[27:03] Final thoughts

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What’s Going on Here?

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 16 Aug 2023 05:00:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram explore the question “What’s going on here?” As we face adversaries, that question can create openings for new discoveries to help us no longer feel helpless or hopeless. We talk about how this transforms our consciousness and leads to change and perspective to help us get unstuck.

“Is the way I’m thinking about this part of the problem? Yeah, that’s a tough reality to face, but when you’re really willing to go there, something opens up. New possibilities open up.” -George [03:02]

“Letting go of control and letting go of old patterns, even when they’re dysfunctional, it’s almost systemic, I think, in the human condition. That’s the hardest thing for our journey, I think, is that transition to a new place, to a new consciousness.” -Scott [11:18]

“I think often the words “ego” and “false self” get conflated, because there will always be value on some level to having ego.” -Seth [22:50]

“The world doesn’t have to look exactly like how I imagine it might or my life doesn’t have to look exactly as I imagine it might for it to be good.” -Anna [29:16]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[01:05] Transform your consciousness

[05:02] A place of exploring and curiosity

[09:46] Our inability to let go

[17:30] Facing adversity

[21:35] Detaching from the ego

[24:39] How George is being surprised

[26:43] Final thoughts

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The Observer Effect

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 09 Aug 2023 05:12:00 -0500

Every paradigm shift includes an observer effect, which is the proven ability of observation to influence outcomes. In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, George Stull, Scott Reall, Anna Bryant and Seth Abram talk about the observer effect and how to stop and observe, and sustain attention.

“I realized that it’s really difficult to be patient without hope.” -Scott [03:22]

“To me, the observer effect has to do with the sustaining of our attention for longer periods of time, practiced periods of times, which is super important so we can stay with the rising and the falling of our automatic thoughts, emotions and sensations.” -Seth [07:13]

“I think that it cannot be overstated, the importance of paying attention in life.” -Anna [25:24]

“How we see is what we see, and to see rightly is to be able to be fully present.” -George [29:02]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:05] Intro

[02:51] The importance of patience

[06:24] Sustain attention

[09:28] Stop and observe

[12:33] Listening beyond ourselves

[18:04] Where the divine dwells

[23:12] Final words to take away

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Becoming Our Own Choice Architect

Restore Small Groups — Wed, 02 Aug 2023 05:01:00 -0500

In this episode of the Searching Inward Podcast, hosts Scott Reall and George Stull are joined by Seth Abram, Director of Outreach at Restore Small Groups, to discuss how to become our own choice architects. Everywhere we go, the world is designed to aim our thoughts or influence our decisions. What if we made the choice to be our own choice architects for our lives? We discuss how to design a system of our lives to become our choice architects for making wise decisions, getting us to more thriving and joy in living.

“Grace is what invites me to build awareness of who I really am, but also sees where have you been going.” -Scott [12:18]

“I would say that grace is the practice of opening to receive who we are.” -Seth [16:50]

“Co-create. That’s an important landing spot for this chapter, because choice architect isn’t putting our finger up in the air and seeing which way the wind’s blowing. We have a pretty good guide.” -George [29:16]

TIMESTAMPS

[00:06] Intro

[00:29] Introducing Seth Abram

[04:28] Becoming choice architects

[05:57] Create a system of grace

[16:27] Defining of grace

[19:53] Reward of a new system

[28:15] Co-create today

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