Our gender identity and sexuality are intensely personal and nuanced facets of who we are as human beings, and finding a therapist who understands and accepts us for those facets, whatever they may be, can be incredibly daunting.

Karen and Kieran use this episode to create an open dialogue to help listeners better understand many of the common terms used to refer to gender, sexuality, and romantic relationships.

What You’ll Learn

• About Dr. Kieran Grosman
• An unexpected impact of transitioning
• Avoidance VS Self-Protection
• What do AFAB, queer, and cis mean?
• Why we should consciously create spaces for open dialogue?
• What is the difference between transgender and transsexual?
• How does the trans experience differ between generations?
• Why are pronouns so important?
• What is polyamory, and how do polyamorous relationships differ from monogamous relationships?

Psychiatry is a medical and mental health practice that lives somewhere between what we think of as medical care and mental health care. This episode aims to dispel the myth that psychiatrists can prescribe a pill to take all your problems away and clear the muddied waters around what psychiatric treatment looks like for patients, whether they're dealing with anxiety, depression, or managing chronic illness.

What You’ll Learn

• Psychiatry VS Therapy - which is right for you?
• Why can't I talk to my primary care doctor instead of a psychiatrist?
• How do appointments differ?
• Insurance and OON benefits
• What are the top three things you are seeing come in through your practice?
• How do you decide which medication to prescribe?
• Are there medications that are specific to mental health that are often abused?
• Can holistic practices be combined with psychiatric practices? What would you recommend?
• What is one common misconception about psychiatry/mental health?

On this week’s episode of So, How’s Therapy?, our guest is psychologist, coach, and expert in the field of therapy for men, Dr. Heather Stevenson.

There are certain boxes that our societies expects us to fit into, and these expectations change across cultures, generations, and genders. The world that we live in today holds men in particular to a standard of leadership, courage, and strength.

And that's exactly what we'll be discussing today.

What You’ll Learn

• Seeking out therapy: Men vs Women
• How societal gender norms affect men’s relationship with mental health
• How cultural/work stigma affects men’s relationship with mental health
• Same-gender vs different-gender patient-therapist relationships
• The most common reasons men seek out therapy
• Why it is important that men are allowed and encouraged to express their emotions
• What we can do to help men feel more comfortable seeking out therapy

On this week’s episode of the So, How’s Therapy? Podcast I am joined by Tamara Duker Freuman, MS, RD, CEN to discuss the brain-gut connection and how the two systems affect each other. We also discuss how DGBIs and how anxiety can exacerbate symptoms, along with much more.

Lastly, there is a lot of shame around DGBIs, and we take a moment to discuss why and how being open with your healthcare providers can be incredibly helpful overall.

What You’ll Learn

• About the brain-gut connection
• What DGBIs are, and what they are not
• How IBS can be treated
• IBS mimickers (and how to tell if you might be experiencing one)
• How anxiety can impact DGBIs
• What role adherence takes

Full Show Notes

https://cohesivetherapynyc.com/blog/brain-gut-connection/

Be sure to tune into episode 11 for the second half of our conversation.

OCD Is Not An Adjective.

On this week’s episode of So, How’s Therapy? I am joined by Tatyana Mestechkina, Ph.D. to dive deep into the topic of obsessive-compulsive disorder, or OCD.

Trigger Warning: Sexual Thoughts / Thoughts Of Harming Others: We discuss a few examples of intrusive thoughts within the context of OCD that have content of violent and/or sexual nature. 

While the term OCD is commonly known, it is also commonly misunderstood. Obsessive-compulsive disorder is often portrayed in the media as someone who washes their hands over and over again, or someone who has to have everything in its place – but it’s much more than that.

Today we'll be demystifying OCD, and helping you understand it at a much deeper level.

What You’ll Learn

• What OCD is (and what it is not)
• Causes of OCD
• How OCD affects the lives of those who experience it
• Different types and subtypes of OCD
• Treatment of OCD

Full Show Notes

https://cohesivetherapynyc.com/blog/010-ocd-demystified/

Be sure to tune into episode 11 for the second half of our conversation.

OCD Is Not An Adjective.

On this week’s episode of So, How’s Therapy? I am joined by Tatyana Mestechkina, Ph.D. to dive deep into the topic of obsessive-compulsive disorder, or OCD.

Trigger Warning: Sexual Thoughts / Thoughts Of Harming Others: We discuss a few examples of intrusive thoughts within the context of OCD that have content of violent and/or sexual nature. 

While the term OCD is commonly known, it is also commonly misunderstood. Obsessive-compulsive disorder is often portrayed in the media as someone who washes their hands over and over again, or someone who has to have everything in its place – but it’s much more than that.

Today we'll be demystifying OCD, and helping you understand it at a much deeper level.

What You’ll Learn

• What OCD is (and what it is not)
• Causes of OCD
• How OCD affects the lives of those who experience it
• Different types and subtypes of OCD
• Treatment of OCD

Full Show Notes

https://cohesivetherapynyc.com/blog/010-ocd-demystified/

This week on the podcast, I am joined by my colleague, Danielle DiCamillo, LCSW to discuss the effects that trauma has on both the body and the mind - it’s all connected.

We’ll discuss the different categorizations of trauma, the importance of recognizing your trauma as valid, and how you can find some relief from your symptoms - whether they are physical, mental, or emotional. Join us to learn about these topics and so much more! 

What You'll Learn

• The body and mind are interconnected and interdependent
• Trauma is stored in the body and the mind
• Trauma can affect your physical, emotional, social, and mental health
• The difference between “Big-T” and “Small-T” Trauma
• How trauma and anxiety are connected
• Some tools and techniques to calm anxiety

Full Show Notes

https://cohesivetherapynyc.com/blog/009-traumas-impact-on-mind-and-body/

Sometimes, we don’t take the time to nurture or express kindness as much as we could. Kindness is linked to happiness, satisfaction in relationships, and improved quality of life overall. It helps people feel more connected to one another.

What You'll Learn

• How to express loving-kindness toward yourself
• How to express loving-kindness toward people you love
• How to express loving-kindness toward those around you
• How to express loving-kindness toward difficult relationships

Full Show Notes

https://cohesivetherapynyc.com/blog/008-loving-kindness-meditation-with-host-karen-conlon-lcsw/

Sometimes it can feel really uncomfortable, difficult, or challenging. But you should never feel like therapy is retraumatizing, and you should certainly not feel like you are getting worse. In this episode, I'm covering all the ways that therapy might be making you worse, and how to address them.

What You'll Learn

• What 'Good Therapy' should feel like
• How to know when things are turning for the worse
• How your Clinician's skill set has to match your needs
• What to look out for
• That feeling bad in therapy doesn't mean your therapy is bad

Full Show Notes

https://cohesivetherapynyc.com/blog/007-can-therapy-make-you-worse-with-host-karen-conlon-lcsw/

Deciding what to bring up and when can feel daunting – especially if you have a lot to talk about. In this episode, I’ll walk you through how to decide what topics to bring up, and when. Often the overlooked, uncomfortable, and hard-to-talk-about topics can lead to the biggest realizations.

What You’ll Learn

• How talking about things you don’t think are important can be the missing piece to a larger puzzle
• Why progress in therapy can cause bigger, underlying things to come up
• That therapy is an ’emotional sandbox’
• Why there’s always a reason to talk about things, even if you think you can’t do anything about them
• That talking about your problems does not make you a bad person, friend, family member, or spouse
• What limits there are – confidentiality

Full Show Notes

https://cohesivetherapynyc.com/blog/006-what-should-i-talk-about-in-therapy/

It sure does feel like that sometimes though, doesn’t it? Money is a hard topic for most of us to discuss, but that doesn’t mean we should just ignore it completely. I spoke with my friend and colleague Jelisha Gatling (LMFT), founder of Let’s Unpack Therapy about money, relationships, and how we as individuals relate to money.

She actually just released a course about this very topic called Money, Mindset, and Marriage.

I honestly forgot we were recording a podcast while she and I were working on this episode. I learned so much, and there were so many ‘aha’ moments. Especially around money scripts…but more on that later.

What You’ll Learn

• What financial infidelity is and how it can impact your relationships
• Shame, guilt, and scarcity and how it relates to money
• How gender norms, our childhoods, etc. can impact our view on money
• Money and intergenerational trauma
• The four money scripts and what they mean
• How to set healthy boundaries around money with those around you
• How ‘Let me think about it’ is one of the most powerful sentences you can use

Podcast Resources For Relationships And Money Struggles

• Jelisha’s Money, Mindset, and Marriage Course
• Let’s Unpack Therapy
• Jelisha’s Instagram @savingthesaver
• Free Money Scripts Quiz

Full Show Notes

https://cohesivetherapynyc.com/blog/relationships-money-struggles-with-guest-jelisha-gatling/

If you’ve dealt with chronic illness, especially an invisible illness, it can be hard to effectively communicate with those around you about your needs. If you look good on the outside, people might think you feel okay on the inside. Unfortunately, sometimes that couldn’t be further from the truth.

In this episode, my colleague Rachel Kaplan, LCSW, and I are talking about all things chronic illness – from spoon theory to how it can impact various facets of people’s lives.

What You’ll Learn

• How a chronic illness diagnosis can alter someone’s way of life completely, how they see themselves, and how they relate to others
• About toxic positivity, and how sometimes those with chronic illness can do it to themselves
• How to better explain to someone that doesn’t have a chronic illness what it’s like to live with one
• That invisible illnesses can be some of the hardest to deal with
• If you know someone with a chronic illness, how you can better support them

Resources

• Managing Chronic Illness
• More Information on Rachel Kaplan, LCSW

Full Show Notes

https://cohesivetherapynyc.com/blog/so-hows-therapy-004-managing-chronic-illness-what-you-dont-know-does-hurt-me-with-host-karen-conlon-lcsw/

If you feel like you had well-meaning parents, but you struggle with feelings of shame, guilt, or emotional distance, you might have experienced Childhood Emotional Neglect. CEN comes in many forms, and the effects are long-lasting.

What You’ll Learn

• How Childhood Emotional Neglect is a not-so-obvious trauma
• The difference between psychological abuse and emotional neglect
• The common effects of Childhood Emotional Neglect
• Why your parents may have been emotionally unavailable or unaware
• Why we need emotions in the first place
• What we can do to begin the healing process

Resources

• Childhood Emotional Neglect Questionnaire from Dr. Jonice Webb
• Running on Empty by Dr. Jonice Webb, PhD
• Running on Empty No More by Dr. Jonice Webb, PhD

Full show notes: https://cohesivetherapynyc.com/blog/what-is-childhood-emotional-neglect-and-how-it-impacts-your-adult-life/

In reality, anxiety is a necessary part of our lives and warns us when things can go wrong. It protects us when we are faced with a fight, flight, or freeze situation, and motivates us to take charge of situations.

But while anxiety can be helpful, when it starts to impact your day-to-day life negatively it can become a problem. Living with constant anxiety isn’t good for your health – physical or mental. The good news is there are lots of ways we can work together to help you cope.

What You’ll Learn

• Why anxiety is not something we can cure (and why nobody should tell you they can)
• When anxiety can actually be helpful
• How different people experience anxiety – from Generalized Anxiety Disorder to Panic Disorder, to Social Anxiety Disorder and more
• How different types of anxiety manifest in our lives
• The difference between helpful worries and unhelpful worries

Full show notes: https://cohesivetherapynyc.com/blog/get-rid-of-anxiety/

It’s that nagging feeling you have when you’re working on something productive, but you know you should be working on that task you’ve been putting off. Or delaying a task because you don’t think you’ll be able to execute it well enough – you just need a few more hours of research and then you’ll get started. It’s avoiding tackling the work at hand, and reasoning with yourself as to why you shouldn’t work on it yet.

Perfection paralysis is avoiding tasks, even though you know you should be making progress on them. Maybe you’re worried about what would happen if you fail. Or perhaps you have negative emotions around the person or thing you’ll need to work on to complete the task. Maybe you’re concerned about what would happen if you succeed.

No matter the reason, perfection paralysis can have a negative effect on our lives and cause us to delay, avoid, and procrastinate. So what do we do about it? We look deeper into why and how we are experiencing perfection paralysis.

After all, delay, avoidance, and procrastination are rarely ever about lack of time, but rather your feelings and emotions about the task at hand.

What You’ll Learn

• First, the usual suspects when dealing with procrastination, including fear of judgment, anxiety around imperfection, imposter syndrome, and how to deal with each of them
• How delay and avoidance are symptoms of the real reasons we experience perfection paralysis – our emotions
• How I struggled with perfection paralysis and imposter syndrome, and how I overcame it.
• Learn to tackle perfection paralysis head-on, so you can finish that task that is taking up too much headspace and achieve your goals
• Lastly, My big why for starting this podcast, and how your big why can help you succeed in moving past perfection paralysis, too.

Overall, while perfection paralysis may tend to visit some of us more than others, it’s probably a feeling we can all relate to. By leaning on your support systems, doing enough research to feel confident (but not too much that it becomes its own delay tactic), knowing that it’s okay to fail, and just starting, you can overcome those fears of judgment, anxiety about not achieving perfection, and make progress towards your big dreams and goals. After all, if you let perfection paralysis keep you stagnant, you’ll never know what you could have accomplished.

My Invitation To You

What is the one thing that you’ve been procrastinating, avoiding, etc.? Challenge yourself to think about what it is that that means to you. What are you anxious about?

If you feel so inclined, DM me your thoughts over on Instagram @so_hows_therapy_podcast, or send me a quick note at info@cohesivetherapynyc.com. I’d love to hear from you.

Full show notes: https://cohesivetherapynyc.com/blog/perfection-paralysis-with-karen-conlon-lcsw/

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